#ok. croissant emoji. fuck you.

[foulfiendfern]

s1 jonmartin is one of the funniest things to me

[teddiesbestestpal]

An average conversation between Morgana and Tiefsee

Morgana: * texts :)

Tiefsee: * texts ;)

Tiefsee: * hey!

Morgana: * hey

Tiefsee: * texts hey what

Morgana: * texts you said hey first…

Tiefsee: * texts ok.

Morgana: * texts croissant emoji

Tiefsee: * texts fuck you

Morgana: * after texting Tiefsee “?????”

[tf2fansderogatory]

Spy is a bland texter which is the worst crime you can commit </3 couldn't be me tbh -🎭

*Tom Cardy voice* you ask me what night am I free? And I reply yes. Full stop.

I send you a little smiley face... So you send me back a little smiley face.... So I say hey, and you write back hey, and I say hey what? And you say but you said hey first. And I say ok. Croissant emoji. Fuck you.

[bounce-a-coin-off-your-witcher]

lip synch your way into my heart pt. 3

Part One // Part Two

(listen, I’m not holding pt. 4 hostage or anything, but please leave me some comments or fun tags on this one? that’d be really cool of you)

---

Jaskier wraps his hands tightly around the warm paper cup he’s clutching between them and feels his face go hot yet again. Geralt thinks the younger man’s blush the cutest thing he’s ever fucking seen, so he’s continued to shower Jaskier in compliments to turn him pink over and over. At last Jaskier works up the courage to ask: “So how’d you manage to get so popular, anyway? What’s the secret to becoming an influencer?” 

“Looks, probably,” Geralt shrugs. He takes a sip of his cappuccino and makes steady, gentle eye contact with Jaskier. “I started making Tik Oks with my friend Yennefer as a kind of goofy joke but then I just sort of...gained a following? She always tells me it’s because of my cool hair and, uh, rockin’ bod.” 

“Ah, you’re accidentally famous,” Jaskier smiles against the rim of his cider. It’s early fall and Jaskier lives for warm cider; he drinks it at every available opportunity. Warm and sweet? Those are two of the best adjectives in the world! And, he’s learning, they also apply to Mr. White Hair himself. 

“What’re you studying?” Geralt asks. Jaskier hears the honest curiosity behind the words and marvels again that this Adonis of a man has deigned to give him the time of day, much less take him to a bougie coffee shop and pay for both of their drinks and croissants.

“I’m nearly finished with a degree in Music Theory right now, with a minor in applied psychology.”

“Can you even get a minor in applied psych?” Geralt laughs. “It took me forever to get a minor in monstrosity-based biomed added to the college roster. Although technically I have a bachelor’s in applied veterinary studies, I really wanted to go into monster research and work with the big boys in the field. Like kikimoras and maybe even some griffins. An archgriffin if I’m lucky enough to get accepted to the breeding and rehabilitation program at the University of Aedirn.”

Jaskier’s expression is screaming shock and awe and it fills Geralt with pride. Or it does, until Jaskier asks: “You have a degree?”

Geralt purses his lips and takes another slow sip of coffee. “Should I...not?”

“No, it’s just that I-” Jaskier cuts himself off by biting his lip. Geralt’s amber eyes lock onto the spot where Jaskier’s teeth have the gentle pink skin held captive and he swallows audibly. Jaskier, still worried that he’s somehow offended the influencer, is blissfully unaware of what he’s doing to Geralt. “You’ve got to be making some kind of money off this whole thing, so I didn’t think you’d need a degree. It was silly of me to assume you didn’t and I’m sorry for putting my whole foot directly in my mouth so early on in our date.”

“It’s fine, Jask. It’s not like you already know my personal history or anything; actually I was almost finished with school when the likes and follows really started pouring in.”

“That’s...cool?”

“Yeah, it’s been interesting,” Geralt chuckles. “I’ve been chased down for selfies a handful of times now and it’s really uncomfortable. How am I supposed to just live my day to day life when every other intern at my research facility wants a selfie for their Tumblr or whatever?”

“Wow. I’m glad I’m not internet famous.”

“Not yet.”

“Huh?” Jaskier asks, glancing up from his drink again. 

“Oh I just…” Geralt trails off into thoughtful silence, a habit that Jaskier has very quickly picked up on, and taps his fingers against the table for a moment. “I wondered if you’d want to go on another date?”

“I’d love to!” Jaskier answers a little too quickly. Then his eyebrows furrow in confusion, “What does our second date have to do with not being famous yet, Geralt?” 

“If we end up getting more serious,” the influencer mutters, barely audible, “I thought it might be cool to make some videos together. Or something. You totally don’t have to do that if you don’t want to, though.”

Jaskier’s pretty blue eyes go wide and shocked and terrified. Geralt’s heart drops into his shoes before he hears the whispered, “But why me?”

“What do you mean?”

“I mean...why me? There are prettier, smarter, more creative boys out there. And girls, I guess. They could get you way more likes and views than I ever could.”

Geralt's hand darts out before he can stop it, grasping onto Jaskier’s wrist gently but firmly. The younger boy could break his hold easily with one slight movement to the side, but he doesn’t. Not yet. He wants to hear what Geralt has to say. “You’re not a prop, Jaskier. I didn’t ask you out in the dumbest, most elaborate way I could think of just because I wanted more views. I didn’t spend two hours browsing through every one of your comments until I found ‘this one is my favorite’, so I could re-create it just for you. I did those things because I just...like you?”

Jaskier goes totally red this time and Geralt is elated. Then the younger man giggles nervously and makes eye contact again, “I have the right kind of vibe?”

“Yeah,” Geralt smiles. The tension that had gathered in the air between t hem dissipates, “You have exactly the kind of vibes I’ve been looking for. We’re vibemates.”

“Oh my god they were vibemates,” Jaskier jokes and they both laugh. 

“So, what’s your favorite color?” Geralt asks, and the conversation really takes off from there.

---

Geralt drives Jaskier home a little after midnight and walks him to the front door of his apartment. “I don’t think I’m ready for a goodnight kiss yet,” the brunette admits. Geralt takes one of his hands instead, brushing his lips against the back of Jaskier’s knuckles with a quiet sort of reverence. Jaskier’s eyes stay locked with the influencer’s until his hand is gently returned to his side and the older man winks. 

“See you soon?”

“Yeah. Text me whenever.”

“Cool. Goodnight, Jaskier.”

“Goodnight, Geralt. Please drive safe, and let me know when you get home?”

Geralt’s heart launches into his throat and his chest floods with happy warmth. Jaskier cares. “I will.”

---

On the relatively short drive home, Geralt thanks every deity imaginable for closing the more convenient Party City near his house for good; otherwise he’d have never met the man he hopes to make his boyfriend.

He thinks about his next Tik Tok; it’s got to be perfect. It has to be a public declaration of his feelings; Jaskier had expounded upon the romance of PDA for several long minutes during their date and Geralt wasn’t afraid of showing his cute new love interest off.

“What kind of song should I use, though?” he asks the empty air. No one replies, of course, and Geralt drives the rest of the way home in silence. 

He remembers to text Jaskier goodnight and receives a heart emoji in reply.

Oh yeah, the influencer thinks to himself, I’m well and truly fucked.

[preface2adreamplay]

Under Your Spell (Part 21) - Let Me Twist It A Little Deeper

Summary: A Jared Padalecki/OFC /Oscar Isaac fiction.

Stef is not having the best weekend at the con.

Chapter warnings: Flirting, swearing, infidelity. masturbation, angst. 

Chapter WC: 3,554

Everything was packed and ready to go. Stef lay in bed, unable to switch off the noise of the day.

‘Come on, Stef, go asleep,’ she told herself. Pushing off the covers and pulling them back on again. Tossing and turning didn’t cover how much she had moved around. 

Finally, she gave up. Grabbing her phone from her bedside table. 4am. 

Claire was staying with Richard. Jared was with his family and who knows where Oscar was. 

She scrolled through insta for a while, seeing all the photos fans had shared from the previous day. A headache was forming behind her eyes, it was gonna be one of the bad ones, she knew. 

‘Fucking sleep!’ Stef cursed. Only one thing left to try. Reaching down under the sheets, Stef rolled her fingers around her clit, the first thought that came to her mind was Jared on stage, smiling and joking. The next thought was him shirtless, the last time he was in her bedroom, jeans hanging low on his hips, arm muscles bulging while he fished around on the floor for his clothes. 

Breathing out a soft groan, Stef continued, fingers finding her opening hot and wet. She slid inside, one finger. Jared breathing on her neck, sucking soft kisses against her jaw, his voice in her ear, ‘c’mon Stef, give it to me.’ 

It was a phrase he liked to use when he was in a playful mood, she would relinquish control of her pleasure to him. When he took control of her, his hands, his mouth, his voice would be everywhere, all over her. His mouth humming against her in the most delicious way. And she would ride waves of pleasure. 

Stef felt her walls contracting around her finger, her body trembling and finally stilled as she drifted into a disturbed and dream filled sleep.

Oscar had taken her by the hand, dragging her through the crowds, ‘look at them!’ he kept yelling over his shoulder. ‘Let go of me, I can’t go with you.’ Stef tried to twist her arm from his grip. They stopped at the stage where the Q&A had been. Jared sat with his wife in his lap, giggling with her between kisses. Instant fiery hot jealousy raged through her. ‘Look at them!’ Oscar said again. His dark eyes on the couple that were wrapped up in each other. Stef drew her gaze away, unable to look at them any longer. Oscar didn’t flinch when Stef waved her hand in front of his face, he was in a daze, his mouth open in a soft smile. ‘Help me get away.’ Stef shouted. Jared started, seeing Stef below him. ‘No wait, come back.’ He begged. 

Stef was running, the carpet beneath her bare feet was turning into steps too high for her to climb, she couldn’t run hard enough to get away. An arm caught her as she tumbled. 

Stef couldn’t hold back her tears, burying her face in the chest of the man holding her up. 

Stef woke suddenly, throwing the blankets away. Running her hands down her face, she glanced at herself in the mirror across the room. She was perspiring, hair was clinging to her neck. ‘What the actual fuck?’ 

Stef didn’t dream much, but that one made her feel sick to her stomach.

Wiping the bathroom mirror clean after a hotter than hell shower, Stef looked at her face, wanting the woman looking back at her to settle her nerves, tell her she wasn’t being an idiot, it went with the territory. 

Why are you really fucking surprised, was all she said. 

Stef sat on the side of the bath tub and cried. 

Claire had done her best to make up for not being around. When she finally got around to coming back to the hotel room they were sharing, Stef was dressed and fresh faced.

‘Did you sleep?’ Claire rummaged through her bag looking for clean clothes.

‘Not much. I bet it’s pointless to ask if you got sleep last night.’ Stef winked seeing Claire trying to hide a coy smile.

‘I have to shower but then we are definitely having breakfast. There is a thing on later that I wanna check out but I’ll be back before lunch and then we can head back to the airport, k?’ 

Claire was being overly nice, her voice raising a little higher with every sentence.

‘Richard wouldn’t happen to be doing the thing you’re interested in, is he?’ Stef finished applying a second layer of mascara. 

‘Maybe,’ Claire elongated the word, disappearing into the bathroom.

Stef’s phone beeped. Picking it up she saw a message from Jared.

Jared: Good morning sweet thang. x

Stef put the phone back down and checked herself in the mirror. Heaving a sigh, she gathered herself, put on a smile and bent to put on her Nike’s. There would be more walking today, it called for comfortable footwear. Her jeans were loose around her waist, she hadn’t realised she had lost some weight. Not too much to be noticeable she thought. 

Claire was singing in the shower. Stef chuckled, hearing it was one of her older songs, Claire loved the band Stef was taking a break from.

Shit, she thought, remembering one of the members had called her a couple of days previous to ask when she was available to meet up.

Every year or so they would meet, see what was going on with each other and decide if they would do new music or not. 

Hitting the call button, her old friend answered straight away.

‘Hey, Stef! How are you?’

‘Sorry I kinda forgot to call you back, Nik, I’m in Toronto right now.’

‘Yeah, I was talking to Oscar yesterday he told me he ran into you over there. Having fun?’

‘The most fun,’ she lied. 

‘We are meeting Friday night at that bar you hate.’ Nik blew smoke down the phone. Stef knew the sounds of him inhaling and exhaling like his life depended on that one cigarette.

‘I’ll be there.’

‘Great!’ He did sound excited. Stef smiled, excited to catch up with them.

‘Gotta go, I’ll get the details from you during the week.’

‘For sure. Later, Stef.’

‘Was that Jared?’ Claire peeked out from behind the bathroom door, steam billowing behind her. Strands of dark red hair plastered against her face.

‘Nah. Nik. Band meeting.’

‘Oh,’ Claire seemed a little disappointed. ‘Will you see Jared before we leave?’ Her voice kept on the side of casual/hopeful instead of the misery Stef felt creeping into her bones.  

‘I’d like to think so, but, with his family showing up I don’t know if he can get away.’

Stef didn’t have to hear Claire tutting from the bathroom to know how she felt about it. 

Stef looked at her phone as it pinged again. 

Jared had sent a very close up selfie. Laughing, she replied.

Stef: Good morning, Jared. How are you today?

Jared: Tired. Glad this con is almost over. Photo ops at 12, you gonna be around?

Stef: Yep, can swing by before we leave. 

Jared replied with a few celebratory emojis. 

‘Claire, come on, I’m hungry.’

‘Go down without me, I’ll be right behind you.’ Claire was brushing her teeth furiously.

Ok, Stef shrugged.

Filling her plate with as much food as possible, Stef was trying to figure out how to use the coffee machine when someone brushed past her, nudging her elbow, sending a piece of toast sliding off into the mug she had managed to fill with a watery mix of milk and coffee.

‘Sorry,’ a soft voice came. Stef turned to say it was cool when she met the woman’s eyes. 

‘It-it’s fine,’ Stef stammered, her eyes glued to the beautiful brown eyes staring up at her. It was Jared’s wife.

Fuck, Stef thought. 

‘You’re uhm, you’re…’ Gen tried to find a way to say her name without owning that this was the woman her husband was fucking. 

‘Yeah,’ was all Stef managed to say. 

‘Well, you’ve made him a happier man. When he comes home to us.’ Gen said graciously, putting a hand on the shoulder of a boy standing next to her, gaping up at Stef.

He had Jered’s eyes and my god, he had Jared’s hair. Stef swallowed hard, what could she say to that?

’Nice to meet you, anyway.’ 

Gen gave Stef a smile and taking her son by the hand, led him away. Stef closed her eyes, her mouth dry like a fucking desert. Suddenly, the coffee didn’t seem so important. But, there was a queue building up behind her.

‘Go ahead, I can’t seem to work it,’ Stef moved away from the person waiting patiently next to her. Rubbing her nose with her hand, she cleared her throat, not sure where to look or what to do. Fearful of moving her eyes across the room in case she were to see Jared’s family again or worse, Jared himself. She couldn’t face him now. 

Claire arrived, hair swinging, bosom bouncing, a huge grin on her face. ‘Hey did you get me coffee?’ 

Her smile turned to a horrified look, ‘you ok?’ Rubbing Stef’s shoulder. ‘You gonna puke?’

‘Maybe,’ Stef replied, ‘Can we grab a seat?’

Finding a small table hidden behind a huge, ugly plant, Stef told Claire what had just happened.

‘So she thanked you for sleeping with her husband? She’s a better woman than I would be.’

‘Claire!’ Stef pinched the bridge of her nose, the toast on her plate now finding its way to Claire’s mouth.

‘What?’ the redhead replied, ‘She could have ignored you, or punched you, or made a scene, but she didn’t. Sounds like she was just as shocked to bump into you.’

Stef nodded, her brow furrowed. ‘My life is not normal. This is getting awkward.’

‘This is probably the only time you will ever meet her or even see her, just chill.’

Stef blew out a breath, rubbing her sweaty hands against her jeans. 

‘I’m gonna get you a coffee and a chocolate croissant, then we can go see Richard. He will make you laugh and forget your troubles.’

Stef groaned.

‘Now that was my attitude when I first came to the con, you changed my mind. C’mon.’

‘Is it bad that I want a Margarita for breakfast?’

‘Yes, it is, this situation is not that bad.’

***

Claire hadn’t let Stef hide away in the room, which was a good thing. The convention was so big, the chances of her running into Gen again were slim, but Stef kept looking over her shoulder anyway. She regretted agreeing to see Jared at the photo op’s, but bit the bullet - well, asking Richard to scope out the room first and waiting for him to come back and confirm it was mostly Padalecki-free. 

Stef had never seen this section of a convention before, people lining up to take silly/well thought out pictures with Jared and Jensen. 

Jensen smiled and nodded when he saw Stef waiting off to the side. He leaned in to say something to Jared, who turned his head so quickly in her direction, his hair flipped into Jensen’s face, hitting his friend in the eye. The people close enough to see roared with laughter. Jared was falling over himself apologising to Jensen, clapping him on the back with his huge hand, winking over at Stef. 

‘I see why you like him,’ the familiar voice next to her made her smile. ’Tall, handsome, funny. I’d hit it.’

‘Oscar,’ Stef scolded softly. He was alone, standing with his hands in his pockets.

‘Where’s your date?’

Oscar made a dismissive sound, ’She bounced, I’m really good at making people feel unwanted, apparently. It’s a talent, it would seem.’

‘She left?’ Stef shook her head, laughing. 

‘Yes, she did. She said I wasn’t emotionally available.’ Leaning in so that only Stef would hear. ‘I’m kinda glad, she was jealous about everything.’

‘You’re not into chicks that are fawning over you?’ Stef bit her lower lip.

‘Nah, maybe I just didn’t like her.’

‘You heading home today?’ 

‘Yeah, you?’

‘You don’t sound excited.’ Stef was watching a couple set up their photo, within seconds their experience was over. A fleeting moment that would stay with them forever. 

Jared made eye contact with her and pulled one side of his mouth into a grin, looking over Oscar quickly and greeting the next in line. 

‘Want me to get out of your hair?’ Oscar murmured. 

‘No,’ Stef hooked her arm into his, changing the direction so she was walking away from Jared’s line of sight.

‘We haven’t had time to hang much at all.’

‘You want to hang with me?’ 

‘Yeah.’ Stef squeezed his arm. Oscar’s chest puffed out a little. 

‘What’ll we do then.’

‘I saw a stall with some stuff that had your Star Wars guy, Darius specifically requested something with your face on it.’

Pushing his tongue between his teeth, Oscar threw his head back to laugh. 

‘Why the fuck not, let’s buy my own merchandise.’

***

Jared: Where did you go? Photo ops just done.

Stef: Just grabbing a drink, you want one?

Jared: I’ll meet you in the bar, I’ll be about 5 minutes.

‘Is that him?’ Oscar eyed her over his drink, taking a long gulp and sighing. 

‘Yes, he’ll be down here in a few minutes.’ Stef put a hand on his arm. He had rolled up his shirt sleeves. One fist resting on his hip and he cocked an eyebrow, glancing around the room, he looked too hot. Stef had to check herself.

‘Why are you looking at me like that?’ He said, not looking at her, his eyes resting on a pair of blondes sitting at the opposite end of the bar.

‘Like what? I don’t want you to go if that’s what you mean.’ Stef pouted.

‘No, you’re looking at me like I’m lunch.’

Stef opened her mouth to laugh, involuntarily spitting her drink across his lap.

‘Oh shit, I’m so sorry.’

Oscar brushed the droplets away, laughing too much to form a coherent sentence. ‘I didn’t think it would have that effect.’

Wiping her chin with a napkin, she eyed him curiously.’ What kind of reaction did you think you would get?’

‘I dunno, I thought it might make you argue with me.’

‘You want an argument?’ 

’Nah, I just wanted to wind you up a little before your dude gets here.’

‘My dude, as you say, is already here.’ Stef raised her eyebrows in greeting as Jared made his way toward them. Oscar turned his head, not bothering to adjust how he was sitting, legs splayed open, knees on the outside of Stef’s, keeping her sitting in place at the bar. 

‘Hey,’ Jared said softly, tucking hair behind his ear. 

‘Hi,’ Stef grinned up at him. He was nervous, shifty. 

‘I guess I should formally introduce you both.’

They did that thing that men do when they don’t think women notice, they were eyeing each other, sizing each other up. Shaking hands and making pleasantries. Neither spoke, waiting for Stef to break the ice.

‘We will be leaving after lunch.’

‘Isn’t lunch, like, right now.’ Jared checked his watch.

‘Shit it is. Where the hell is Claire??’ Stef reached into her bag and checked her phone. No messages. Typical.

‘I cannot trust that woman around Richard, my god!’ Stef huffed, pressing the call button and listening to the tone on the other end, knowing Claire wouldn’t be picking up.

‘She could be back in the room.’

Oscar was half grinning, a knowing look on his face. ‘Better go check, you don’t wanna miss your flight again.’

‘Again?’ Jared was looking incredibly awkward now. 

‘Oh, Claire has made Effie miss a couple of flights over the years. She almost missed a video shoot her band was doing in Italy.’ 

‘Oh don’t remind me, that woman causes me stress I could do without.’ Giving up on the idea of Claire picking up her damn phone.

‘I gotta head back up to the room anyway, we will be leaving soon too.’ 

Jared put a hand gently on Stef’s elbow, hoping to get her up off her seat and away from Oscar. 

‘Yeah I’ll walk with you,’ turning to Oscar, placing a beer mat on top of her glass. ‘Mind my spot for a few minutes?’ 

Oscar nodded, turning his attention back to the blondes at the bar.

‘Nice to meet you, man.’ Jared offered Oscar his hand, the shorter man taking it, ‘You too, finally.’ Oscar winked at Stef as she walked away.

Stepping into the elevator, they were finally alone. Jared grabbed her waist, drawing her to him. ‘Damn, I’ve wanted to kiss you all fucking day.’ His teeth were nipping at her lips, teasing. Stef stood on her tip toes, trying to reach his mouth. ‘Kiss me then.’

Jared groaned when their lips met. It wasn’t long enough. The doors were opening on her floor. He took her hand in his, leading her down the hall. Stef was looking down at her small hand wrapped in his. ‘That ok?’ He squeezed her fingers.

‘Yeah, just surprising.’ 

Jared shrugged, stepping behind her as she slid the key card into the hotel room door. They were greeted with two naked bodies writhing on the bed. 

‘Oh god!’ Stef covered her face, unable to tear her eyes away from Richard’s naked ass bouncing as he pummelled into Claire.

Pulling the door closed with a bang, she covered her face, eyes wide. ‘How can I un see that?’ She gasped, laughing so much she thought she would puke.

Jared was on his knees, unable to speak. 

It took a few minutes for them to calm down, Richard’s frantic cries of ‘are you guys still out there?’ made the situation worse. Neither Stef nor Jared could answer him.

Jared had managed to drop his gum onto the carpet, causing him to laugh even more.

‘Don’t put that back in your mouth.’ 

‘That’s what she said.’

‘Oh Jared, please stop, I’m in pain from laughing.’

A large hand was on her back, her face was suddenly crushed into his chest. He was gasping for air like he had run a race. 

‘Well that’s put a good ending to a rough weekend.’ Jared was wiping tears from his eyes.

Stef remembered running into Gen earlier in the day, her stomach twisting with guilt. Or maybe it was jealousy. Or a sickening mixture of both.

Swallowing, she looked up at Jared.

‘What’s up, babe?’ 

‘Nothing.’ She lied, kissing him gently on the mouth.

‘You sure?’

‘Yeah, I’ll just miss you is all.’

‘You have good company downstairs, Oscar is keeping your seat for you at the bar.’

‘Jared…’ Stef wanted to explain what had happened earlier, but he cut her off with another kiss.

‘I’ll call you tomorrow, I’ll be back home. After the kids go to bed. Sound good?’

’Sounds good.’ Stef agreed, unable to hide the disappointment in her eyes at how this weekend had panned out. 

Richard opened the door, having dressed himself in a hurry. ‘Come on, man.’ he said to Jared, pushing past them, his cheeks flushed, hair tossed from Claire’s fingers. 

‘Gotta go.’ Jared kissed her quick and left, following Richard down the hall. 

Stef stuck her head in the door, ‘you decent?’

‘Doesn’t matter, you saw everything just now.’ Claire wasn’t half as bashful as Richard. 

‘Oscar is waiting for me at the bar. Meet us down there?’

‘Let me just fix my sex hair and I’ll be down.’

When Stef made it back down to the bar, she saw Oscar talking to a woman. She was hitting his arm and laughing. It was fake. Everything about her was. You can spot when someone wants someone because of their fame, and this was one of those vacuous women.

Stef put her arm between them to get her drink. ‘Oh hey, you’re back.’ Oscar looked happy at her reappearance. 

She was one of the blondes he had been ogling. His face said ‘please help.’ And while Stef would usually have left him to it, she decided on this occasion to do a good deed. 

’I’m Stef,’ she said, sticking her hand out for the stranger, who took it, gingerly.

‘Sorry, are you with him?’ She asked, pointing a talon at Oscar’s chest.

‘Yeah,’ Stef said simply.

The blonde looked her up and down, taking in the old Nike’s, loose jeans and band t-shirt. 

‘Call me,’ she mouthed to Oscar, swaying back toward her friend. 

‘Do not call her.’ Stef warned, sliding back onto the barstool, her legs fitting snuggly between Oscar’s again.

‘Just filling the time til you came back,’ Oscar sighed, leaning his torso toward her.

‘You look flushed, what’s up.’

‘I just caught Claire and Richard fucking.’ Stef looked at him, wide eyed and excited. 

Oscar put a hand over his mouth, his nose scrunched up as he laughed. ‘No fucking way.’

Stef finished off her beer in one gulp. ‘Buy me another one and I’ll describe Richard’s ass to you.’

‘Oh fuck, please don’t. But, I’ll definitely buy you another drink.’ Oscar winked, turning to grab the barman’s attention.

Butterflies. He had given her butterflies with that look.

Fuck, she thought

[ktrsvo]

I looked through my old docs and found this dumb story where the whole class fought over a massaging chair and a napping closet, and kaminari was like “fuck all of u guys”, and iida was mad at everyone, saying, “everyone step away from the chair, we shouldn't be fighting over silly, trivial things!” and mineta tried to climb on it, but bakugou grabbed him by the collar and said, “oh no you don’t, grape bitch,” and tossed him at the wall, and everyone cheered, but immediately went quiet again bcs oh, right, they’re all still fucking fighting, so kaminari suggested, “lol, then let’s host a contest: the first person to make todoroki smile today gets both of the prizes for an entire week”, and he was only half-joking, but then everyone took it seriously. 

so when todoroki walked inside the room, they all pretended to act natural, except for bakugou, the guy just walked straight-up to todoroki and yelled, “fucking smile, asshole!”, and kirishima said, “wtf dude you can’t just say things like that!”, and todoroki just gave bakugou his ice queen glare and walked away. sero, ashido, and hagakure sent him memes and they watched his reaction carefully, but he just sent back the sunglasses emoji with a blank face and sero was offended bcs it was hard to tell if todoroki appreciated them or not. 

uraraka gave todoroki a cookie that aoyama secretly powdered with salt, and todoroki said “um...this...has..a very..interesting..taste”, and then he walked away, and then aoyama laughed and said, “salty, are we?” and, mutinous, uraraka glared at him. in her head she accused him, “i know you did this, you - you croissant.” the entire class was starting to get very antsy and irritated after a few more failed mishaps. why! is! todoroki! not! doing! the! thing! we! want! him! to! and then all of a sudden midoriya walked inside the room saying, “hi guys what did I miss?” and everyone was like oh... hey midoriya... and then todoroki immediately walked over to him, and then midoriya just said, “oh, hi, todoroki-kun,” and todoroki smiled at him, and then midoriya said something else and todoroki laughed, and after they both left the room, everyone started sulking bcs the competition was cursed from the very beginning the end

ok im sorry this is fever-dream garbage i will leave

[haunting-kind-of-high]

Vampire!Roman headcanons

So, this is part of my Being Human AU, based on the awesome show Being Human. This one focusses mainly on Roman and a bit on his relationships with the others. 

This turned out much longer than I originally intended oml

Warnings: Mentions of blood, death, the plague, that's it, I think

He was bitten when he was around 20

It happened at night, when Roman was alone in his chambers

It’s a miracle the intruder snuck into his room, but it’s a vampire we’re talking about so what’s more miraculous?

After that, he just… disappeared

He travelled across England at first

But there were too many memories, and after a few decades it got painful

So many people died

And then the Plague came and even more people died

He just had to get out

So he did

And he travelled the world after that, watching how society changes

He would stay somewhere for a while and then leave if staying got too risky

Either because he went a little too far with his blood-drinking needs, or because too many people close to him had died

Sometimes he’d leave if all his friends were dead, and staying around just hurt him too much

He was in Rome when the Renaissance started and he still loves every memory he made there

Seeing the world changing like that… it was fantastic

Loves ancient mythologies

He probably knew a lot of famous painters let’s be real

I also really like the thought of him knowing Hal (an awesome vampire in the show who’s cool)

Maybe he was the one who recruited Hal? I’m not sure if it fits in the show’s canon though

He has at least heard of him because every vampire has

Roman is a hella gay vamp

Goes to pride every year he’s able to

Is so happy pride exists because he needed that when he was a young 100 vamp

Rome was probably one of the best periods of his life and he never wanted to leave

But after a while, when everyone he knew was dead and he couldn’t stand to be there for much longer

So he continued his travels

He travelled through Europe and Asia

Somewhere in the 1880s/1890s he briefly joined the Old Ones

The Old Ones are a group of vampires who are… well… pretty old

They’re also super powerful, immune to religious symbols, and they’ve got more cool perks

But Roman wasn’t too fond of their way of living, so he left them and returned to England in 1915 to fight in the war

After the war, he went to America

He didn’t want to stay in England anymore

Too many painful memories

That was when he decided he wanted to stop drinking blood

Or try at least, because it is fucking hard

And he started to remember the people he killed and he couldn’t stop thinking about it and he hated it, but he hated blood more, even though he needed it so much

At first, he went to New York first and travelled a bit

He met Logan in 2011

It was in Michigan somewhere

He saved Logan from being beaten up by asshole vampires but that’s a story for another day

They weren’t super close at first, but Roman helped Logan find his way in the supernatural world, Logan helped Roman find his way in the modern world, and they grew pretty close

Logan tried to help Roman with his resolution to stop drinking blood but he didn’t know how to help

Roman appreciated the help though

After a pretty bad relapse, Roman decided he had to move and Logan insisted on going along, even though Roman protested this

But Logan didn’t give up so they moved in together

They moved to Florida

Once they moved into their house, he really had to get used to Patton being around, but he warmed up to the ghost pretty quickly

It was strange, though

He has a lot of nightmares

About the night he was turned into a vampire, about the people he killed, about the wars he fought

It’s not unusual for him to wake up in the middle of the night, convinced he is in the middle of a war, or back in medieval England

At first, Patton tried his best to comfort Roman. He didn’t need to sleep anyways

But it was difficult because Patton had no idea what it was like, and Roman hardly told anything about his nightmares

Roman liked having someone around at night, though

When Virgil moved in, he grew more open about his dreams

He wasn’t planning on it, but he plans on spending the rest of his life with Virgil and he can’t exactly hide his nightmares for all of eternity

And once he does, he’s glad he opened up to Virgil

Virge seems to know exactly what to do to help him out and his presence is a comfort

Sometimes, Roman will wake up thinking he is in the middle ages and he will be disoriented for a while, before Virgil reminds him that it’s 2018 and everything is fine

Roman is so intrigued by modern technology

I mean, phones can fit entire portraits in them, and it takes just a few seconds to make?

You can contact someone on the other side of the world in mere seconds?

Witchcraft, that’s got to be it

Smartphones don’t always work well for him, because his touch is pretty cold but that doesn’t stop him

Huge space geek

Believed the moon landing was fake for a little over 50 years, though

He just couldn’t believe that something was out there and that people can walk on that something

Still in denial about it

But Logan knows

In fact, he was the one who told Roman it was real

He still teases Ro about it every now and again

But yeah space geek Ro

Can't believe there are things out there other than small dots of light

Gets defensive when people make flat Earth memes because he believed that for ages

“I mean, it’s not that unbelievable, right? You can’t see that it’s round, what else are we supposed to believe? How were we supposed to know it was round?”

Every time he brings it up, the others reassure him that it's a joke and it's not meant to ridicule him or whatever

Still forgets the concept of round Earth sometimes

Same with the heliocentric model

"You can see the sun moving! How can it move across the sky if it isn't actually moving? It doesn’t make any sense!"

He has had a lot of discussions about this with Logan

Still doesn’t understand it

Loves Candy Crush

“It is so colourful and cute! How does one come up with this ingenious design?”

The others don’t tell him that there are tons of other games like it

He texts like parents

You know, using correct grammar, lots of emojis

I’m looking forwards to the movie *tons of emojis but for some reason I couldn't get them to work*.

He used to start every text he sent with a “hello (…),” or something similar and he used to end them with a signature thing

But the other convinced him that everyone knew it was him sending the texts and that it was only more effort for him

So he stopped that

The emojis and correct grammar still stand tho

Ok.

Virgil and Patton still haven’t convinced him to give up the ‘Ok.’

It’s agony

He is adorably naïve when it comes to spam and phishing mails

He’s lucky the others are there to stop him from clicking the damn link

“But it says right here that I still have to pay-”

“That’s a lie, darling, they just want your money.”

“But-”

“Just delete the mail.”

Always goes to Logan when he has a problem with technology

Constantly mixes up the slang he learned across the ages

“Don’t flip your wig, Lo! Everything is going to be fine.”

“I had a gas tonight, guys.”

But no one knows what it means

The fifties slang are his favourite. They’re just so fun.

He also uses medieval words a lot, as that is what he grew up with

Keeps calling water Adam’s ale

One time Logan got hurt and he requested an ‘acopon’

No one knew what he meant and it took him ages to explain because he couldn’t come up with the modern equivalent of the word (which would be a plaster)

Sometimes he’ll be stuck in like medieval language for an entire day and no one will understand what he’s saying

Like, it sounds kind of familiar, but not familiar enough to be sure of the meaning

It’s really frustrating to all of them

Also misuses modern slang a lot

“Would you look at the weather outside? It is so bright, and not a single cloud! How wonderfully lit!”

“I… I’m not sure lit means what you think it does, buddy.”

It is hilarious

When he starts dating Virgil, he finds out about Vine and because Virgil loves vines so much, he starts watching them too so he can understand the references and surprise Virge by making references himself

But he gets them wrong a lot too

One day, Logan and Patton are talking in the kitchen

Roman just looks at them and turns to Virgil with a

“And they were roommates”

Virgil almost chokes on his drink

“Oh my god, they were roommates”

Roman’s favourite vine is the croissant one

“I could have dropped my croissant” becomes his thing

It’s cute, but it starts getting annoying when he says it to everything

The others just let him be, he is a 700-year old dork, he needs this

He is upset he doesn’t show up on camera, because otherwise, he’d be all over vine

He had so many great ideas for vines

He has definitely seen some of his old stuff in museums

“Oh my goodness, my old sword!”

For a 700+-year old vampire, he doesn’t know when to chill

But he just gets excited when he sees his stuff

At one point in his life, he has definitely seen an old portrait of him in a museum

And someone definitely saw him looking at it

And they definitely saw the resemblance

And they definitely told Roman about it

He just nodded and told the person that his friends told him about it too

Wishes he could just steal the portrait because it makes him look so good and handsome

He thought about it, but quickly realized that telling staff of the museum that “he wants this portrait because it is him” would sound just a tad… weird

He’s really upset about it

Gets really nostalgic a lot

He has experienced so many things and seen so many amazing things

Met so many people

He misses them a lot

It just hurts to know that you’ll outlive most people you will meet in your life

He has always tried not to get too attached to people because they’re going to die anyways

But somewhere along the way, he let this attitude go

One way or another, he always grew to like a few people

He likes to tell his friends about what he remembers of his travels and experiences

Especially Logan, cause that man is a fucking history nerd

Roman loves Logan so much, because he’s so smart

They have the best conversations

A lot of them are about some event in history, or about modern-day society, cause that still confuses Roman

Loves cartoons

They’re just so cute and so amazing and sweet

He and Patton watch a lot of them together

As a ghost, Patton doesn’t need to sleep, so sometimes they will stay up until four am binge-watching some cartoon

Virgil and Logan try to tell them to stop – especially Roman

But it doesn’t work

Roman is very protective over Logan, because he is the only mortal of their group

Of course, he and Virgil can still die, but there’s a smaller risk of it happening

Patton is already dead

But Logan can still die

And Roman wants to keep Logan around as long as possible

So every time something even remotely dangerous happens around Logan, Roman is there to safe him.

Can’t have their favourite werewolf die

He is scared to lose Logan, but he knows it is inevitable

He just wished it would be different

Roman has quite a few of vampire contacts – they need to work together in order to avoid being discovered, after all

I mean it would be weird to have a passport that says you were born in 1296

So there are vampires to take care of that

Roman knows quite a lot of them personally and they always question his scent

It’s blood-like, as it is supposed to be, but there is a hint of dog

Roman mostly says that it’s because he has a dog, but there are a few people who know he doesn’t have a dog

There’s one or two who know about Logan and they don’t understand him

Why would a vampire be friends with a werewolf? That is unheard of

Roman is also friends with a few vampires who like to organize dog fights

Where a werewolf – during full moon – is caged with a human, who has a knife. At the end of the night, just one survives

And Roman lives in constant fear that one day, they will go after Logan for their sick forms of entertainment

Roman has seen a few dog fights when he was younger, and it is absolutely horrible

He doesn’t want Logan to have to go through that

And then there’s the risk of Logan dying, which makes it even worse

He thought about asking them to not capture Logan, but he feared that they would do it on purpose, just to spite him

So Roman thought of a system

If Logan was ever out and vampires came up to him, he would call Roman, but not say anything

Roman is in his emergency contacts, so that works well

And if Roman heard what was going on, he would track Logan’s phone to see where he was going – taking a few wooden stakes with him – and save his friend

There’s no way he would allow them to put Logan through something as horrible as a dog fight

Sometimes, the age difference between him and Virgil is quite… difficult

They’re both from different generations, obviously, and their experiences are just totally different

They try their best to understand the other, but it’s difficult sometimes

Virgil doesn’t know what it’s like to fight in a war, to see your best friends dying, to wander the earth, knowing that you will never die. He doesn’t know what it’s like to see half your city dying to the Plague

Virgil tries

But he just doesn’t understand

But it’s fine, because Roman loves him and they will have an eternity together to understand each other

He really loves Virgil a lot dude

On multiple occasions, he’s written Virgil a super romantic love letter

You know, one of those extra ones

Super extra

Lots of “my love”, “my darling”, lots of romance

But it’s cute

Virgil has kept every one of those letters

Roman listens to classical music a lot

But he also sort of likes rock

Nothing too heavy though

He can handle most genres though, but rock and classical music are some of his faves

Tries to headbang

But he can’t do it

Virgil says it’s because he’s to old for that crap

Roman doesn’t believe him

He’s young at heart how dare Virgil

Yeah Roman is v cute

[spacedys]

gonna send you somethin reall quick

it aint gonna be a dick pic nono

romance needs claarityy but baaby that dont work for meeee

im sendin miiixeeedd messsagessss

mixeeedd messageessssss

i send the first text in a cuuteee wayy

and thsn i dont reply for seeeveenn fucking days yeaahh

mixed messaggesss

mixed messaaagessssss

ohhh you text me one night iif im free and i reply yeeess, full stop.

i send you a little smiley face (SMILEY FACE)

so you send me back a little smiley face (SMILEY FACE)

AND THEN I SAY HEY AND SO YOU WRITE BACK HEY

AND I SAY,,, HEY WHAT??

AND YOU SAID,, YOU SAID HEY FIRST.

AND I SAY.

ok.

CROISSANT EMOJI.

fuck you.

MIIXEEED MESSAGEESSS

MIXEEEDDDD MESSAGESSSSSS

ONE SECOND, I SAY YOURE VERY PRETTY

AND THEN I SHOW UP AT YOUR HOUSE AND I KICK YOUR DOG YEAH

MIXEEDDD MESSAGEES

MIXED MESSAGEEEEESSS

I PAY FOR THE DOGS VETERINARY BILLS

BUT THEN I PUNCH YOUR DAD IN THE DICK

HA

HA

HA

HAHA

now were going to a hoosspitaall just me you and your dad in the back of an aammbuulanceee

and even with your dads broken dick, the air is filled with

sexual tension

im real sorry for punchin your dad in the dick i wont do it agaaainn

you make me shake his hands and promise but as i do that, i ball up my other fist and i—

PUNCH YOUR DAD IN THE DICK AGAIN

I PUNCHED YOUR DAD IN HIS FUCKIN DICK

AGAIN

[ittybittypbandj]

The Internship - Chapter 2

A multi-chapter Bittyparse fic with fluff and angst! Woot! 5 chapters, weekly updates. Also on ao3. <3

Summary:

Eric Bittle arrived in New York two weeks ago, newly single and ready for a fresh start. This internship was just what he needed to jumpstart his life.

Kent Parson loved his life in New York. He was at the peak of his NHL career. He had friends, the world’s greatest cat, and everything he thought he needed.

He never expected a small Southern blonde to burst into his life and turn everything on its head.

“Lordy, Bun, he winked. Winked! What on earth was I thinking, stayin’ late like I could just make myself at home?”

Señor Bun listened patiently, all floppy ears and non-judgmental beaded eyes. Bitty turned away from the desk, where he’d just finished organizing video clips on his laptop for work the next day, and pulled back the covers to climb into bed. He settled Señor Bun into the crook of his arm and tugged the quilt up around his chin.

“You’re the best listener, Bun.” Bitty nuzzled the worn rabbit and closed his eyes. He hadn’t talked to Señor Bun when he lived with Jack – it seemed too juvenile for his serious-NHL-star boyfriend’s bedroom – but he always felt better after spilling his feelings to his rabbit, and today’s events definitely needed Señor Bun’s comforting touch.

The thing was, Bitty had liked Kent’s wink. Really, really liked it. He’d enjoyed the whole day, in fact. Kent was surprisingly warm and welcoming. He’d been a great host, offering them drinks, chatting with the crew, picking up lunch from the Cantonese restaurant on 10th Ave.

He was also easy to look at, and Bitty wasn’t blind – built like a daydream with his blonde waves and solid muscles. He was only a few inches taller than Bitty, but Bitty would bet he had thirty pounds on him, all pecs and abs and quads, mercy.

But he shouldn’t be thinking about all that. It was too soon after his and Jack’s breakup to be thinking about someone else, and Kent Parson of all people. What on god’s green earth was he doing?

He opened his eyes and stared at the ceiling in the dark. Sometime last month, he’d stopped counting the number of days since the breakup. One day it just didn’t make sense anymore. It was like he’d looked down at himself and found a millstone in his hands he never realized he’d been carrying, and once he realized its weight, he could finally drop it.

He still had sad days, and little things sometimes knocked him off-balance like a gust of wind. Jack had been his first boyfriend, first real love. Bitty missed a lot of things about their old life. He’d hear a person speaking Quebecois on the subway, or see ducks in a neighborhood park, or smell maple syrup as he walked past a café, and memories would wash over him.

Bitty hugged Señor Bun tighter and sighed, feeling guilty for the little part of him that desired Kent Parson and his muscles. It was disloyal. Kent was the Bad Guy. Wasn’t he?

“We’ll get through this, Bun, just you wait and see. We’ll be courteous and professional. It’s a business relationship, that’s all.”

As reassurances went, it felt a little hollow, but Señor Bun didn’t comment and Bitty let the conversation drop. He closed his eyes, burrowed a little lower under the covers, and focused on his breath until he drifted off to sleep.

_/_/_/ \_\_\_

Kent: [image07194421.jpg]

Jack: Is Kit wearing a Rangers jersey?

Kent: dude

Kent: read better

Kent: it says Purrson 90 on the back

Jack: Hah, you got her a personalized cat jersey. You’re ridiculous.

Kent: you’re just jelly cuz she could own ur ass at hockey

Kent: her FO% is .52

Jack: I repeat, you’re ridiculous. How’s your day?

Kent: her slapshot tops 90mph

Jack: Did you run today?

Kent: yeah but it was muggy as balls

Kent: u?

Jack: 6 miles, 39:50, light hills

Kent: slacker

Jack: What was your time?

Kent: a gentleman wouldn’t ask

Jack: C’mon, Kenny…

Jack: Please?

Kent: haha

Kent: oh man I forgot I ordered delivery. gotta go, food’s here [sushi emoji] [grinning cat emoji]

Jack: OK weirdo.

Kent dug the heels of his hands into his eyes. Ugh, why did all of his texting turn into piles of steaming shit?

He was texting Jack to build their friendship. Back when Kent was seeing his therapist regularly, they’d talked about what Kent would do if Jack started communicating with him again. They’d written down a list of strategies that Kent could use to help rebuild their friendship as adults, without the tangle of hormones, stress, and unresolved mental health issues that led to their first fiery downfall.

This – texting Jack pictures of Kit – was part of Kent’s Being-Friends-With-Zimms List. So far Jack had initiated most of their text conversations, sending Kent his workout stats and asking him for Netflix recommendations. Kent figured it was his turn, and Kit looked hella cute in her Purrson jersey. He wasn’t about to offer Jack his morning run time; he was always faster than Zimms and it wasn’t polite to brag.

He wanted to eventually get around to asking about Eric, since he was pretty sure adults asked each other if it was OK to be friends with their exes. But, like, one step at a time.

And then Jack had called him Kenny in his text. It was the first time since that party at Samwell years ago. Kent called Jack ‘Zimms’ all the time, and Jack called him ‘Parse’. Those were hockey nicknames, Parse-and-Zimms, Zimms-and-Parse.

Kent’s stomach felt twisted in knots. ‘Kenny’ wasn’t a hockey nickname. It was intimate, and a decade ago it would have been followed by desperate, whispered Quebecois. Kent had convinced himself ages ago that Jack didn’t think of him as ‘Kenny’ anymore.

So, Kent totally freaked and aborted the conversation with made-up sushi. Fuck his life.

He sighed and flipped his phone over. This friendship plan was therapist-approved, damn it. He wouldn’t waste his best chance at being friends with Jack on one stupid texting freakout.

Kent: sorry Zimms, the delivery guy was downstairs

Jack: It’s no problem.

Kent: so, tell me about ur run. get passed by any little old ladies?

_/_/_/ \_\_\_

Bitty and Kent emailed frequently in the two weeks leading up to launch. There were a surprising number of details to iron out. They exchanged photos. Bitty sent a list of proposed posts for Kit’s Instagram and Twitter. Kent replied with changes (Kit always wrote in first person, #NYClife was better curated than #NYC, etc.). Bitty appreciated Kent’s thoughtfulness.

He didn’t appreciate sorting through a deluge of emails from Kent, though, and he wished they could do some things over text. Kent had a habit of sending an email half-written, then replying four or five times with additions and random thoughts. Was it weird to give a professional contact his personal number? It wasn’t, right? He had Meesha’s number. But with all the weird history between him and Kent, what if it was a bad idea?

The night before launch, after sifting through another forty emails from Kent, Bitty finally bit the bullet and emailed Kent his cell number.

Tomorrow’s the big day!!!, he wrote. The advertising placements go live at 3am, social media at 9am. We’ll monitor the comments and retweets from the office. You and Kit are going to do great.

Here’s my cell if you need anything. Shoot me a text if you want help replying to Kit’s comments, or if you need me to use the admin functions to block a troll (not that Kit will have any trolls, she’s the sweetest li’l thing and the internet loves her).

Talk to you tomorrow!

Eric

An hour later, Bitty’s phone dinged with an incoming message.

[Unknown Sender]: hey this is Kent

[Unknown Sender]: texting so you have my number for tomorrow

Bitty: Hi Kent! How y’all doing tonight?

Kent: good, watching minority report and drinking wine. Kit’s practicing her autograph

Bitty: She’s such a sweetie [grinning emoji]

Kent: u?

Bitty: I’m waiting for a batch of mini-pies to finish baking, then I’m off to bed. You & Kit should get some sleep too, big day tomorrow

Kent: pie??? [pie emoji] [heart-eyes cat emoji]

Bitty: I’m a bit of a baker. It helps when I’m nervous [blushing emoji]

Bitty: Someday I’ll bring you some, how’s that sound? My blueberry cream cheese pie was first runner-up at the Georgia state fair

Kent: you are my hero

Bitty: Lol talk to you tomorrow Kent

Kent: night Eric

_/_/_/ \_\_\_

“Can I get something started for you, sir?”

Kent stepped forward and smiled at the barista. He ordered a latte and a morning bun. She rang him up and efficiently prepared his order, handing him a to-go mug and a pastry the size of Kit’s head. He squeezed into a booth with rustic benches and a bud vase of daisies, and waited for Eric.

This was Kent and Eric’s first Post-Launch Monthly Touchbase, or whatever businessy name Eric had called it in his email.

The day was gorgeous – cool and dry, which was unheard of in New York in August – and Kent didn’t want to waste it by meeting in an office. He’d asked if they could meet somewhere else, and Eric had recommended this sunny café near Washington Square Park. It was eclectic and cute, and Kent was going to chirp Eric to hell and back over the hipster croissant/bagel hybrid – cragels? bagants? – the café was supposedly famous for.

After ten minutes, Kent spotted Eric through the window approaching the café, tugging earbuds out of his ears and looping them around his thin fingers. He wore a pale yellow sweater over a light blue button-down and navy khakis that hugged his thighs, and Kent silently, sternly reminded his dick that this was a business meeting.

Eric ordered and made his way to the table. He set down a small pastry between them and looked at Kent with his warm, inviting brown eyes.

“Have you tried the cragels? They’re just lovely. I got us one to share, they always sell out.”

Kent groaned.

The business part of the meeting was efficient and smooth, like all of his and Eric’s interactions so far. In the two weeks since launch, they’d texted regularly and kept up with the marketing plan, so really all they needed to do was confirm the advertising placements for September.

Kent enjoyed working with Eric. He was capable and self-assured. Although Kent was starting to discover he was something of procrastinator, if the number of emails Eric sent after midnight was any indication.

Bitty tapped lightly on his phone screen. “Let’s see now, you’re in training camp starting September third…any dates we need to work around before then?”

Kent tore off a strip of morning bun. “Well, we’re already back to training every day, with morning workouts and ice time most afternoons. I don’t think there’s any conflicts though,” he took a large bite and paused as he chewed, “I’ll text you if something comes up.”

Bitty looked up and his lips quirked into a smile. “Lord, I forgot y’all’d be in daily practices already. I can’t believe how quickly I’ve forgotten the hockey schedule. This meeting wasn’t at a bad time, was it?”

Was Eric making a reference to Jack’s schedule or his own college days? Kent wasn’t sure, so he politely ignored it.

“Nah, you’re golden. I started early and did upper body work before coming here.”

“Bulking up for the season?”

“You hadn’t noticed?” Kent asked, fake-sweetly. He flexed comically and Eric laughed.

“Well you keep workin’ on that morning bun, hon. I’m sure that helps.”

Kent gawped. Eric was chirping him. He grinned. It was on.

They joked and talked as customers filed in and out around them. Kent’s cheeks hurt from smiling. Eric’s short hair had gone a little fluffy where he kept unconsciously running his fingers through it. Kent had an irrational desire to grab Eric’s wrist and gently kiss each of his fingertips. He squashed the impulse and rearranged their empty plates in the center of the table.

Somehow the conversation turned to Vegas. It was less weird than Kent expected, although he knew they were both dancing around some of the particulars.

“Why did you move to New York? The Aces wouldn’t have traded you, right? Not right after the Stanley Cup win. I expected them to give you the C or something.”

Kent nodded. “They wanted to. They were ready to re-up my contract, add a no-move clause, the whole nine yards. I just, I never really settled in Vegas, I guess. I’d made a few friends, some guys on the team I’m still close with, but it was hard being all the way across the country. When the Rangers put out feelers – Smith was retiring as Captain, they were looking for something long-term…” He shrugged. “I was interested.”

Eric made a supportive noise. “I reckon it’s nice being closer to family. I know I’d love to have my mama closer than a plane ride away.”

Kent shrugged again. “I’m not really close with my mom and stepdad. It’s cool to be near my sister, though.” He couldn’t hide a grin as he bragged a little. “She’s a senior at NYU, majoring in Biomolecular Science. A total whiz kid. I have no idea where she gets it.”

Eric smiled at him and something warm fluttered in Kent’s belly.

“What about you? How are you liking New York?”

Eric tensed subtly, a tightness in his shoulders and jaw, before he relaxed and leaned forward.

“It’s great. I mean, it’s a once-in-a-lifetime opportunity, y’know? I always wanted to see the world outside Georgia, and this is my chance.” His smile faltered and he picked at the napkin in front of him. He appeared to be thinking.

“I never really thought New York was where I’d end up, but it’s been a good change. When–”

Eric stopped. Kent held his breath as Eric exhaled and squared his shoulders.

“When Jack and I broke up, I was worried I wasn’t gonna find anything up north and I’d have to move home with my parents. I felt like such a failure. When Shitty – he’s a friend of mine from college – when Shitty helped me land this internship, I was nervous as all get out. New York City, lord. But if this was my chance to stay and make something of myself, I wasn’t going to waste it.”

Kent nodded and watched Eric’s face. This was the most personal conversation he and Eric had ever had – shit, it was the first time either of them had mentioned Jack – and he watched Eric’s eyes for any sign of regret.

Eric glanced up and caught Kent’s eyes, then returned his gaze to his napkin and huffed a little laugh.

“Listen to me, ramblin’ on. You’ve probably got all sorts of important things to do today and here I am, monopolizing your time with my life story.”

Kent wanted so badly to reach out and press his fingers against Eric’s face, smooth the frown from his cheekbones. He squeezed his fingernails into his palms under the table.

“I like your life story,” he offered.

Eric looked up, questioning.

Kent smiled in a way he was sure looked dopey, but whatever. “I mean, I like talking to you. Although your choice in cafes is abhorrent. I’m totally choosing the next location. Us New Yorkers gotta educate you newbies.”

His chirp had exactly the desired effect. Eric’s eyes lit up and he straightened in mock indignation.

“Abhorrent? Mister Parson, this café is adorable. Where would you have us meet, a hot dog cart?”

“Somewhere that respects the sanctity of the bagel, for starters.”

Eric laughed, full and rich. He shook his head as he began to bus their dishes. “Well, you just let me know what New York institution you think I need to try first, and we can meet there for next month’s meeting.”

Kent smiled and grabbed their things. He wants to do this again, his sentimental brain thought stupidly.

When they got outside, Eric turned to walk toward the subway at the same time as Kent started walking the other way. They both stopped and turned quickly to face each other, and Eric nearly collided with Kent’s chest. Kent grabbed Eric’s upper arm instinctively, steadying him as he laughed.

Eric’s cheeks flushed at the contact, and at that moment Kent wanted Eric so, so badly. Eric was handsome and bright. He lit up Kent's day like a ray of sunshine through clouds.

And okay, Kent realized that was a corny metaphor. And the whole 'cloudy day' thing wasn't totally accurate – Kent loved his life in New York. He was at the peak of his NHL career, leading the league in assists and taking his team to the playoffs for three consecutive years. He liked the guys he played with, he’d made friends, and he kept in touch with Troy and Scraps.

Hell, he’d even dated a little, something he couldn’t have imagined as a rookie in Vegas. Neither of his recent ex-boyfriends had been endgame material, but he was proud of himself for the serious therapy that finally helped him feel stable enough for a relationship.

In short, he hadn’t expected a small Southern blonde to burst into his life and turn everything on its head. But right now, he felt like there was an Eric-sized hole in his world, and here was Eric, right in front of him.

Eric’s laugh faded and he looked up at Kent with wide, vulnerable eyes. Kent stared at his eyelashes, flitting open and closed as he blinked.

Oh god, Kent suddenly realized he’d been staring for way too long. Had Eric noticed? He dropped the hand on Eric’s arm.

“I, um–” he started, stopped.

Eric jumped in, “I, uh, I’ll email you about the advertising placements.”

“Yeah, the advertising placements,” Kent echoed.

They watched each other in silence. Eric licked his lips, and Kent’s mouth went dry.

“I have to get to the office,” Eric said finally. He waved a hand in the general direction of midtown, but kept his eyes glued to Kent's.

Kent nodded. “I should get home, feed Kit before she gets hungry and starts hunting the neighbors.”

Eric laughed, and just like that the moment passed.

“Take care now, Kent. I’ll be talkin’ to you soon.”

Kent returned the smile. “You too, Eric.”

He watched as Eric walked away. He lifted his left hand and lightly traced his lips with his fingers. If he concentrated, he could almost imagine the feeling was Eric's lips brushing his.

Fucking hell, he was such a sap. He shoved his hands in his pockets and, when Eric’s blonde head finally disappeared down the subway stairs, he turned and walked toward home.

[portmack]

bored n sad

1. DO YOU SLEEP WITH YOUR CLOSET DOORS OPEN OR CLOSED?- idc

2. DO YOU TAKE THE SHAMPOOS AND CONDITIONER BOTTLES FROM HOTELS?- no

3. DO YOU SLEEP WITH YOUR SHEETS TUCKED IN OR OUT?- out i hate when theyre in 

4. HAVE YOU STOLEN A STREET SIGN BEFORE?- no

5. DO YOU LIKE TO USE POST-IT NOTES?- i like them as bookmarks and sometimes ill have to do lists on them

6. DO YOU CUT OUT COUPONS BUT THEN NEVER USE THEM?- occasionally 

7. WOULD YOU RATHER BE ATTACKED BY A BIG BEAR OR A SWARM OF BEES?- bear 

8. DO YOU HAVE FRECKLES?- no

9. DO YOU ALWAYS SMILE FOR PICTURES?- eh

10. WHAT IS YOUR BIGGEST PET PEEVE?- when people are late

11. DO YOU EVER COUNT YOUR STEPS WHEN YOU WALK?- all the time

12. HAVE YOU PEED IN THE WOODS?- probably

13. HAVE YOU EVER POOPED IN THE WOODS?- no

14. DO YOU EVER DANCE EVEN IF THERES NO MUSIC PLAYING?- eh

15. DO YOU CHEW YOUR PENS AND PENCILS?- no

16. HOW MANY PEOPLE HAVE YOU SLEPT WITH THIS WEEK?- 0

17. WHAT SIZE IS YOUR BED?- twin xl

18. WHAT IS YOUR SONG OF THE WEEK?- new york by st vincent

19. IS IT OK FOR GUYS TO WEAR PINK?- sure

20. DO YOU STILL WATCH CARTOONS?- yeah

21. WHAT IS YOUR LEAST FAVORITE MOVIE?- idk

22. WHERE WOULD YOU BURY HIDDEN TREASURE IF YOU HAD SOME?- my bank account

23. WHAT DO YOU DRINK WITH DINNER?- water

24. WHAT DO YOU DIP A CHICKEN NUGGET IN?- i dont eat meat

25. WHAT IS YOUR FAVORITE FOOD?- croissants 

26. WHAT MOVIES COULD YOU WATCH OVER AND OVER AGAIN AND STILL LOVE?- foodfight (2012)

27. LAST PERSON YOU KISSED/KISSED YOU?- nah

28. WERE YOU EVER A BOY/GIRL SCOUT?- no

29. WOULD YOU EVER STRIP OR POSE NUDE IN A MAGAZINE?- not at the moment

30. WHEN WAS THE LAST TIME YOU WROTE A LETTER TO SOMEONE ON PAPER?- yeah

31. CAN YOU CHANGE THE OIL ON A CAR?- i cant even drive

32. EVER GOTTEN A SPEEDING TICKET?- no

33. EVER RAN OUT OF GAS?- no

34. WHAT’S YOUR FAVORITE KIND OF SANDWICH?- not a fan

35. BEST THING TO EAT FOR BREAKFAST?- pancakes

36. WHAT IS YOUR USUAL BEDTIME?- anytime

37. ARE YOU LAZY?- not really 

38. WHEN YOU WERE A KID, WHAT DID YOU DRESS UP AS FOR HALLOWEEN?- idk

39. WHAT IS YOUR CHINESE ASTROLOGICAL SIGN?- boar

40. HOW MANY LANGUAGES CAN YOU SPEAK?- uh the closest to being fluent was italian but i used to be able to half speak spanish and latin

41. DO YOU HAVE ANY MAGAZINE SUBSCRIPTIONS?- used to have a fourfourtwo one but not anymore

42. WHICH ARE BETTER: LEGOS OR LINCOLN LOGS?- legos

43. ARE YOU STUBBORN?- only when im right

44. WHO IS BETTER: LENO OR LETTERMAN?- idc

45. EVER WATCH SOAP OPERAS?- no

46. ARE YOU AFRAID OF HEIGHTS?- no

47. DO YOU SING IN THE CAR?- no

48. DO YOU SING IN THE SHOWER?- no

49. DO YOU DANCE IN THE CAR?- no

50. EVER USED A GUN?- no

51. LAST TIME YOU GOT A PORTRAIT TAKEN BY A PHOTOGRAPHER?- senior pictures in high school

52. DO YOU THINK MUSICALS ARE CHEESY?- yeah 

53. IS CHRISTMAS STRESSFUL?- yeah

54. EVER EAT A PIEROGI?- not since i was like 6

55. FAVORITE TYPE OF FRUIT PIE?- i dont eat pie

56. OCCUPATIONS YOU WANTED TO BE WHEN YOU WERE A KID?- soccer player or vet

57. DO YOU BELIEVE IN GHOSTS?- eh

58. EVER HAVE A DEJA-VU FEELING?- sure

59. DO YOU TAKE A VITAMIN DAILY?- not currently

60. DO YOU WEAR SLIPPERS?- no

61. DO YOU WEAR A BATH ROBE?- no

62. WHAT DO YOU WEAR TO BED?- usually sweatpants and a tshirt

63. WHAT WAS YOUR FIRST CONCERT?- not counting music festivals i think owl city/maroon 5/vv brown

64. WALMART, TARGET, OR KMART?- target

65. NIKE OR ADIDAS?- abibas

66. CHEETOS OR FRITOS?- pringles

67. PEANUTS OR SUNFLOWER SEEDS?- i dont like either

68. EVER HEAR OF THE GROUP TRES BIEN?- idk

69. EVER TAKE DANCE LESSONS?- we had to take a dance class in 5th grade and we learned choreography to a high school musical song

 70. IS THERE A PROFESSION YOU PICTURE YOUR FUTURE SPOUSE DOING?- no

71. CAN YOU CURL YOUR TONGUE?- yeah

72. EVER WON A SPELLING BEE?- no

73. HAVE YOU EVER CRIED BECAUSE YOU WERE SO HAPPY?- yeah

74. OWN ANY RECORD ALBUMS?- several

75. OWN A RECORD PLAYER?- yeah

76. DO YOU REGULARLY BURN INCENSE?- no

77. EVER BEEN IN LOVE?- hm 

78. WHO WOULD YOU LIKE TO SEE IN CONCERT?- tbh ive seen all my favorite favorite bands i think, but maybe hop along

79. WHAT WAS THE LAST CONCERT YOU SAW?- saintseneca/yuck

80. HOT TEA OR COLD TEA?- coffee

81. TEA OR COFFEE?- coffee

82. SUGAR COOKIES OR SNICKERDOODLES?- either

83. CAN YOU SWIM WELL?- well enough

84. CAN YOU HOLD YOUR BREATH WITHOUT HOLDING YOUR NOSE?- yeah

85. ARE YOU PATIENT?- you could say that

86. DJ OR BAND AT A WEDDING?- im not a fan of weddings

87. EVER WON A CONTEST?- yeah

88. HAVE YOU EVER HAD PLASTIC SURGERY?- no

89. WHICH ARE BETTER: BLACK OR GREEN OLIVES?- i dont eat olives

90. CAN YOU KNIT OR CROCHET?- no

91. BEST ROOM FOR A FIREPLACE?- no room

92. DO YOU WANT TO GET MARRIED?- not really

93. IF MARRIED, HOW LONG HAVE YOU BEEN MARRIED?

94. WHO WAS YOUR HIGH SCHOOL CRUSH?- someone that turned out to be a hardcore republican but i didnt know that at the time

95. DO YOU CRY AND THROW A FIT UNTIL YOU GET YOUR OWN WAY?- no

96. DO YOU HAVE KIDS?- i have dogs

97. DO YOU WANT KIDS?- no

98. WHAT IS YOUR FAVORITE COLOR? - bue

99. DO YOU MISS ANYONE RIGHT NOW?- not really

Tell me the 3 best things about you.- im reliable, thats all i can think of

On a scale of 1-10, how strict are/were your parents?- they werent strict with me because i was well behaved and did well in school so probably like 1-2

Who was your worst teacher? Why?- my ap english teacher probably

Who was your favorite teacher? Why?- i like my archaeology professor

Which would you pick: being world-class attractive, a genius or famous for doing something great?- idk

Who are the 3 greatest living musicians?- joanna newsom

If you could change one thing about yourself, what would it be?- everything

What was your favorite toy growing up?- idk

Name 3 celebrities you most admire.- i dont really care about celebrities

Name a celebrity you think is lame.

What accomplishment are you most proud of?- i guess being about to graduate college

Which of your friends are you proudest of? Why?- not really sure who considers me a friend anymore

What’s the most beautiful place you’ve ever been?- barcelona

What are your 3 favorite movies?- foodfight, foodfight, foodfight

Which historical figure would you like to be?- dont care

What’s the right age to get married?- whenever you want to

Tell me 3 things you remember about kindergarten.- i could probably name at least half my classmates

What paper that you’ve written are you most proud of?- ive only written 3? maybe 4 papers all throughout college and im not really proud of any of them they were just assignments to me

What’s your favorite ice cream flavor?- black raspberry or nutterbutter

What’s your favorite holiday?- im not a holiday guy

If you could eat only 3 foods for the rest of your life, what would they be?- i basically already do that

If you could be a cartoon character for a week, who would you be?- thats a good question but im not gonna answer it

What’s one choice you really regret?- several choices i made around age 13

What’s a great book you’ve read recently?- i havent read a real book in a few years :-(

Do you feel like a leader or a follower?- more of a leader

If you could ask your pet 3 questions, what would they be?- why are you a rat

What’s the most courageous thing you’ve ever done?- not die

Who would play you in a movie of your life?- me

If you could be an Olympic athlete, in what sport would you compete?- idk i guess soccer or tennis maybe snowboarding 

If you had to live in a different state, what would it be?- ive lived in 3 states

What living person, other than family members, do you most admire?- hm

What has been your favorite family vacation?- honestly probably random places in Pennsylvania thats vague but those are usually fun

If you could choose your own nickname, what would it be?- idk

Who is the funniest person you know?- some guy from high school

What’s your favorite thing about one of your grandparents?- my grandma is wild

Do you ever talk to yourself? When and what do you say?- not out loud 

When you’re having a bad day, what do you do to make yourself feel better?- suffer 

What’s your favorite smell in the whole world?- i cant smell well my nose doesnt work

What do you think is the greatest invention of all time?- computers

Using one word, how would you describe your family?- mess

Would you rather win an Olympic medal, an Academy Award or the Nobel Peace prize?- nobel but not the peace prize

What’s your favorite time of day?- afternoon

What’s your favorite season?- fall

What’s the one food you could never bring yourself to eat?- i dont eat most things

If you could ask the President one question, what would it be?- fuck you

If you could pick a new first name, what would it be?- theres a couple i have in mind

What’s your dream job?- i wish i knew

Cake or pie?- cake

What’s the best part about having siblings?- someone to play vidya games with

What is the scariest movie you’ve ever seen?- i dont watch scary movies

If you could travel anywhere in the world, where would it be?-italy

What is your favorite family tradition?- we dont have many

Who’s your celebrity crush?- eyes emoji

What trait do you like the most about yourself?- hm

What are you good at?- school

What fictional character do you wish you could meet?- theres a long list

What’s the first thing you do when you get home from a trip?- sleep

Would you rather spend five days exploring Disney or New York City?- disney since i live near nyc and hate it

Whose parents do/did you wish you had?- what

If you could shop for free at one store, which one would you choose?- probably an electronics store

What personal trait has gotten you in the most trouble?- im kind of blunt without realizing it idk if thats a personality trait

Who is your favorite athlete?- who do you think

Would you rather be the most popular kid in school or the smartest kid in school?- i was close to the latter already

What do you like to do on a rainy day?- sleep

What is your favorite thing about the beach?- idk the beach makes me sad these days

If you could be anywhere else right now, where would it be?- asleep

What is your favorite Disney movie?- lilo and stitch

If someone made a movie of your life would it be a drama, a comedy, a romantic-comedy, action film, or science fiction?- dark comedy 

Name a product or service you love so much that you’d happily be that company’s spokesperson.- probably none

If you were guaranteed to be successful in a different profession, what would you want to do?- i wish i knew

What’s the worst thing you did as a kid?- something i deeply regret

What is your favorite day of the week?- thursday

Which super power would you like to have and why?- shape shifting

3, If you were a bicycle, what part would you be?- the brakes

4If you were a t-shirt, what colour would you be and why?- black