#op that last line gave me chills

[strniohoeee]

i neeeeeeddd a part two to confidential 🥺🥺 maybe where matt gets in contact with reader to give her tickets to fly her out to the next show and she's his partner in the show. they win and he fucks her good after the show and finally kisses her. he asks her out on a date and shit and it's just so cute and rough and smutty.

Confidential Pt. 2

Pairing: Matt Sturniolo X Female Reader

Synopsis: Matt reaches out to Y/N after almost a year of not seeing each other. He purchases her tour tickets, and well brings her backstage 🤭

Warnings⚠️: This is Smut. There’s some spit and some hair pulling, and uhhh that’s it. It’s just SMUTTY SMUT SMUT🤞🏽

Song for the imagine: Confident- Justin Bieber and Chance the Rapper

⚠️This is an 18+ imagine, so minors do not interact, or do??⚠️

There’s absolutely no way this is real….I have to be dreaming…..is the Matt Sturniolo DMing me on Instagram right now??

I rub my eyes and make sure this is actually him and not some fake account fucking with me.

-Hey Y/N….cant believe it’s been almost year since I last seen you

-Hey Matt….uh yeah it’s crazy. I seen you guys are about to go on tour again

-We are! I uh actually got you pre show small talk, photo op and backstage passes and tickets to fly out to our first show

-YOURE LYING

-never! And you will be my partner this time….I don’t make the rules

-OMFG WHAT THIS IS INSANE YES YES IM THERE

-Good!

That was about three weeks ago, and right now I was in LA getting ready for their first show that Matt paid for…..this is not real life AT ALL.

Pre show meet and greet started at 3:30, so I got there at around 1:30, and was just waiting around honestly so nervous to see Matt again

By the time I was called it was 4:30. I met Chris and Nick first, and immediately got so nervous meeting Matt

“Hiiii” I said giving him a hug

“Hello again! How have you been gorgeous” he said as he signed a poster for me

“I’ve been very good actually” I said

“That’s good. Can’t wait to see you backstage tonight” he said winking

“Oh…yeah I’m so excited too. We’ve been reunited” I said laughing

“God I miss your pretty face” he said smiling at me causing me to blush

“Shhh” I said rolling my eyes

“And the dress…..whew that dress looks so hot on you” he said looking me up and down

“Thanks matt” I said giving him one last hug

We did the photo op and now it was time to wait for the show to start, so like last time I chatted with some people got something to eat and drink, and just chilled

I was Matt’s partner so at some point they brought me backstage to meet the other two girls. The whole time I was competing I felt Matts eyes on me, and it was making me so fucking nervous.

However this gave him some confidence because we won the first show.

“I have to thank my amazing team member because without her I would’ve lost” he said into the mic

“Thank you LA for an amazing first show! While we set up for backstage enjoy our friend Tril!!” Chris said

After the show, and Tril performing it was time to line up for backstage, and I felt like I was going to throw up…we’ve been through this before why the fuck am I about to throw up

I was the last group once again….Im sure Matt did that

Once again I went in and spoke with Chris and Nick, and filmed a tik tok with Matt because even though I’m sure he was going to fuck my brains out….I needed this tik tok with him

“You know the drill, stay in the back, and I’ll come grab you” he said lowly to me

“Got it” I said smiling

I went back over to Chris and Nick, and chatted with them…I wonder if they knew Matt blew my back out last tour….probably but oh well

“Alright guys! Thank you so much for supporting us and coming out here! Hope to see you guys at our next one” Nick said waving bye to everyone

This time the after show photo op was after backstage, so Matt’s security guard brought me back to another room like last tour, and I just sat in there

Me and my thoughts running wild, and I was so fucking anxious

About an hour and a half later I heard the door opening, and Matt came in locking the door behind him

“There’s that beautiful girl” he said winking at me

“You’re too kind” I said waving my hand at him

“Do you know why I brought you back here?” He asked me

“If it’s not to fuck me….then we have some issues” I said running my tongue along my teeth

“Ouu she knows what she wants….I like that” he said winking at me

“Well I assume that’s why you did what you did. You want to fuck again” I said

“Of course I do. Couldn’t get enough of that pussy” he said walking over to me

He ran his fingers along my bottom lip

“Oh Matt” I said sighing

“I need you so bad, you’re all I thought about these past 10 months” he said licking his lips

“Well I’m here, and I need you bad too” I said smirking at him

He leaned down ghosting his lips over mine

“Well come on then baby” he said before pulling pack, and helping me stand up

“I would love for you to suck my dick again, but I want nothing more than to fuck the shit out of you right now” he said leaning me up against the table

“Fuck Matt” I said moaning at his words

Matt started to kiss my neck to my collar bone, and then looked at me

“I hope you know-“ I cut him off

“Yeah yeah no kissing I got it” I said rolling my eyes, he looked at me and laughed. Going back to kissing my neck

“Fuck Matt I need you now” I said running my hands through his hair as he kissed my neck

“I know baby” he said

Matt then pulled away and helped me hike up my dress. Ghosting his hand over my pussy

“Oh” I sighed

He got down and started kissing my stomach all the way to my clothed pussy. He slowly slid my underwear down

“Fuckkkk” he said biting his lip

“So fucking sexy” he said looking up at me

Before I could answer he delved straight into my pussy, attacking my clit, licking sucking….just doing it all

“SHITTTT MATT” I moaned out my hands immediately going to his hair and pulled causing him to moan into my pussy

He was lapping at me, from my entrance backup to my clit. His nose bumping into my clit

“Fuck Matt I’m going to cum if you keep doing this” I said to him biting my lip

He pulled away and looked at me

“You’re cumming on my dick” he said before backing away

Matt brought his hand up and smacked my pussy causing me to shudder and whine out. He rubbed my pussy to soothe the ache, and then spat down onto my pussy

He pulled his dick out slowly stroking it

“You make me so hard” he said looking me up and down

Matt came up to me and started to rub his dick up and down my pussy

“Oh god” I said letting my head fall back

Slowly he started to push the tip in causing us both to gasp at the feeling

“Fuck I missed this” He said running his hands over my body

“Your dick feels so good….none like this back home” I said moaning

“Oh you fuck other guys?” He said as he bottomed out

“One other guy, but that’s it” I said

“I’m not sure that I like that” he said thrusting into me

“Fuckkkk…..I’m sorry baby I was just so horny and chasing after someone who could fuck like you” I said moaning out

“And they couldn't, right?” He asked panting

“They couldn’t” I said throwing my head back

“Good” he responded

And with that his hips snapped into me, pounding into me at such a delicious rate. All that could be heard was our moaning, the table creaking and skin slapping together

“Oh god Matt” I moaned out lifting my head up to look at him

“This pussy was made for me. You just take me so well” he said as he thrusted into me

As he kept pounding into me he looked ahead of him and saw a full length mirror

“Ohh baby I want you to watch me fuck you” he said biting his lip

He flipped us over, so my stomach was against the table, and he was pounding me from the back

“Look at yourself” he said pulling my hair make me look into the mirror

“Fuck” I said as my jaw dropped as I watched Matt watching us fucking in the mirror

He kept looking into the mirror the whole time while pounding into me

I was clenching down on him nearing my orgasm

“You gonna cum baby?” He asked while panting

“Yes yes yes please” I said looking at him through the mirror

“Whenever you want…go ahead and cum” he said while gripping onto my hair and furiously pounding into me

“FUCK MATT IM GOING TO CUM” I screamed out as I clenched down on him

He kept pounding into me, and suddenly I was shuddering, my mouth fell open as I looked into his eyes while I came all over his cock. Brows furrowed as I shook with ecstasy

“Mmm so fucking good to me” he said grunting as he kept thrusting

“I’m gonna cum baby” he said and suddenly pulled out

Stroking his dick a few times before he painted the back of my thighs in his cum. Moaning and staring into my eyes through the mirror…..god this was so fucking hot

After we caught our breaths he pulled his pants back up. Walking over to the counter and grabbing napkins before wiping me down

He helped me up, and picked up my underwear for me handing them to me

“Keep them” I said winking at him as I shimmed my dress down

“I like the way you think” he said before pocketing them

He was looking at me for a moment before he suddenly pulled me in crashing his lips to mine. Sparks and explosions were going off in my stomach

He pulled away

“I thought you didn’t kiss” I said licking my lips

“I didn’t, but you’re different” he said smiling at me

“I’m glad” I said fixing my hair

“Hey, we have two days to kill in LA. Could I maybe take you on a date?” He asked me

“I’d love that” I said

“Good. I’ll pick you up tomorrow at noon. We can do lunch” he said

“Sounds great” I told him

We actually walked out together this time, and went our separate ways when we got to the exit door

“See you tomorrow” he said

“See you tomorrow” I said back winking at him before walking off

The End

Hope yall enjoyed this one, and I can’t believe I’m at 397 followers this is insane 🖤🖤

-J💅🏽

[milolovesbmc]

RANT ON THE BOYF RIENDS BECAUSE I'M A WEIRDO LOL (Warning: RIDICULOUSLY LONG!)

I saw someone say something along the lines of "Boyf Riends just doesn't work on (the) Broadway (production)" so I'm now gonna rant about it cause I'm a weirdo and I love be more chill (Context, this was under a video with a whole bunch of drawings of Michael and Jeremy in different productions, so played by different actors! Someone commented "Someone should add Broadway" and the op replied with the line I first mentioned, no hate to this person, I'm just being a nerd, also if they see this, your art was amazing and I have nothing against you!!) But anyways this just set me off not a whole tageant about their dynamic, so be prepared for that!

So side note before I start ranting, I'm not saying this in a "Die-hard Boyf Riends shipper" way or something, more in a "the thing this person says makes no apparent sense (at least to me rn)" , also if you want to discuss this feel free to DM me and I'll happily hear you out, I might change my mind about this if someone gives me a good argument, who knows! I'm more than down to discussing this

So anyways, this point just doesn't make sense because of one simple thing: The show's plot and main story points don't change from one production to another. Sure, some details or even dialogue, might change! Hell, the addition of LGW in the Broadway/off-Broadway (?) Run gave as a totally different point of view into Jeremy's character and motivations! But that doesn't change the WHOLE story or the entirety of the perception x person may have on said main character. This just lets us dig a bit deeper into Jeremy's character and how he feels in the moment of making this huge decision of (basically) dumping Michael.

So into why Boyf Riends does/doesn't "work" (work meaning in this context that they fit together, or are fit for each other to put it some way)

I have to start off this by saying that their romantic relationship would not be the healthiest one to say the least. Like you can see this in the platonic relationship they have in the show! And, man, of course it won't be, they're 16! They do not know enough about relationships, neither platonic, romantic or anything in between. Not to say their relationship would be toxic! They just have some codependency issues to work through, because it may not be that apparent but they are, in fact, co-dependent to each other in some ways! They care A LOT about the other's opinion and what they would do in their place, this is shown more from Jeremy's side (probably because we're seeing the story though his lense) than Michael's, we can see this in MITB mainly, whole he's essentially having the breakdown of his life, and we aren't able to see that much of his concern for whether Jeremy likes him or not because he's so okay with himself, he doesn't care what other people think, he wouldn't change for anyone! Which is also why MITB is such an important arc to Michael, because we see that he's not perfectly 100% confident, he's vulnerable too, and he cares, because, shocker! He's still a teenager, with complicated feelings and problems!! He just doesn't constantly feed his insecurities and anxieties because, unlike Jeremy, he likes who he is, he's come to accept himself and wouldn't change for anyone! This latter point is very important, because this means (or at the very least implies) that he will put himself first, not in a selfish way, but in a good way, that's healthy! However, this changes in The Pants Song. You could argue that "He doesn't change anything about him tho! He just decides to help Jeremy!" And you'd be right! But he does so by putting Jeremy before himself and his feelings! Because he's angry, he's grieving because he didn't expect his best friend to turn on him, he needs to process it at least and he deserves to be upset! He insists on not helping him at first, but at last he's convinced by Mr.Heere and ends up, basically doing what Jeremy's father should have done. He basically goes out and saves everyone's ass, even after he gets called a loser on the Halloween party, essentially beat up by a SQUIP-possessed-but-still-Jeremy Jeremy during the play etc.

On Jeremy's side, he is kind of jealous of Michael! Because in Jeremy's eyes, Michael is cool! And he's great! And Jeremy can't process why Michael doesn't hate himself like he does, because the two of them share a lot of traits that Jeremy is bullied for! Because even if not shown, Michael is probably bullied too, but he doesn't pay it any mind, his love of himself is too strong to be affected by it! Jeremy, in some way, kind of looks up to Michael, this could partly also be because of a lack of a parental figure to look up to, but that's a whole other thing. This could affect his view on things, because you could argue that Jeremy sees the SQUIP as that "parental" figure to look up to! Because it knows what's best for him, or so it says, and it's gonna solve all off his problems! So during the bathroom intervention, Michael essentially goes against this idol figure Jeremy has (the SQUIP) which, in Jeremy's eyes, is good! So in that logic, Michael must be the bad person in this! Which is what prompts him to push him away (both literally and metaphorically). That wasn't the point I was discussing tho so back to that! Jeremy needs Michael's approval, he needs Michael to reassure that what he's doing is right! Because nobody else will do the things for Jeremy, not his father, that's for sure!

The problem is that, well, Michael doesn't completely get this! He doesn't get that Jeremy needs him to make the decision for him or help him out, so he just tries to distract him from it with the whole "Cool In College" thing, and at the same time, accidentally confirms his fears, never with that intention of course! But he does. A good example is these lines from Two Player Game: "Dude you are cooler than a vintage cassette, it's just that no one else but me thinks that yet! You're just a nothing in this high school scheme [...]"

Is Michael saying Jeremy's fine the way he is? Yeah! You can understand that from his speech! Will Jeremy most probably just pick up on how he says nobody else thinks that? Also yes

So in conclusion, to end this all off because I'm writing this at 1 in the morning, Michael and Jeremy's relationship does have flaws, it has it's positive and negative aspects, but they can work through them! And about the whole SQUIP incident, I think they just need to actually talk about it and understand why they both did what they did (Mainly for Jeremy's part) and just move on forward! Could moving on forward mean going into a romantic relationship? Sure! It can be whatever kind of relationship you want! Can it also just continue to be platonic/friendship? Sure! Could both work out equally well? YEP! At least from my point of view!

Thanks for listening to me rant, I just have to say this probably went way off rail from what I was saying at the start and might feel kinda pointless, but again, it is 1 am and I'm not reading this again, I hope you can at least enjoy it! :)

[lorilane33]

FanExpo Dallas Write Up

So I went to FanExpo in Dallas yesterday 6-10-23, and it was one of the best days of my life! 🥺 I really went because I wanted to meet Jon Bernthal, and he happened to be within a car drive of me. But Gabriel Luna reminded me why I fell in love with him in the first place when he played Robbie Reyes in Agents of SHIELD, and I’m so glad I followed my gut and met him too. Oof. My heart 😩💜

Random cute guy in line with me named Jacob and I bonded over the Punisher while we were waiting in line to meet Jon. I feel like we were getting along fabulously. As we got to the table to pay for our stuff, I pulled out my photo op with Charlie and Jon to put my sticky note with my name on it. Jacob saw it and leaned into to me, telling me “I think that’s a really good photo. Not to pry or anything, but it’s really cool.” I then explained to him why I did it and he immediately turned back around to me and said, “well your parents are idiots if they can’t be proud of every part of you. And that was a brave thing to do.” 😩 you guys he was so sweet.

Jon Bernthal

I’m 100% positive Jon Bernthal is the first actor I’ve met to make my brain stop working almost completely. I was absolutely on the verge of crying to the point of me grimacing in the photo, but I walked up to him with my bi pride flag and explained to him that my parents will never be proud of this part of my life. I want to make a statement with people who are proud of me. He made sure to double check with me that it was right side up because he wanted to do it right, however we all see how well that went over because my own pride flag was upside down 🤣🤷🏻‍♀️🤦🏻‍♀️ We then turn to the camera and take it, and as he’s handing me my flag back he looks me very earnestly in the eyes and said, “well I am proud of you, sweetheart.” I swear I was fine until that very moment. He’s an intimidating man, and it was hard for me to look him in the eyes for very long. He absolutely murdered me.

I had a duo photo op with him and Charlie as well, and because I looked so not happy in the first one, and my flag was upside down, I decided to redo it with them. I walked up to Charlie and even though this was the first time I was seeing him I said, “I almost cried in my last photo so I want to fix it.” He gladly took the the corner of the flag from me, and I stood between them with Jon on my other side holding it again. Jon looked at me and smiled and said “thank you,” and Charlie gave me a very genuine smile and said, “thanks for being here,” as he handed me my flag back. It turned out so well and I’m so glad I redid it. 🥺 Charlie looks like such a goober and I love it 😂

I’m also so happy the handlers and Jon decided to let us get in line for his autos after his afternoon of photo ops at 6. They had ticketed people who were cut off when he had to leave for his panel that they had to honor first, and they originally were only going to do those and no more because everything shut down at 7. But there weren’t really that many people waiting to be in line behind them so they decided to let us in. We had a short convo and I thanked him for everything, and then he signed my photo op with him and Charlie. I walked away and that was that. I couldn’t have asked for a better interaction with him. Frank has come to mean so much to me, and I’m so happy the man portraying him is just as great. 💜

Gabriel Luna

He was so chill at his table, he was out in the line talking to the people waiting, and he took someone's FaceTime call. I had a chance to talk to him about how Nic Cage may have introduced the character of Ghost Rider to me as a kid, but his portrayal of Robbie Reyes cemented my love of Ghost Rider, and we ended up having a really good conversation about him. 🥺 then I mentioned that him in the Last of Us brought him back to me started him on a whole new discussion about that show and how hard we both think it is to like the second part of the video game 😆 we took some selfies, and during it he told me I had really great hair, but then corrected himself and said, “Oh wait. We both have really great hair.” I hugged him and said I had to go get in line for his photo op but I’d see him over there. He said "okay, and seriously your hair is great!" as I walked away.

His face lit up when he saw I was next in the line for a photo op, and when I got up to him he grabbed my left hand like we were dancing to pull my arm out so he could look at the tattoo that was there (it says ‘you are not alone, and is signed my another actor I met in 2018) 🥰 he said that’s really good advice to yourself, and then we faced the camera. I accidentally blinked when we did our first photo, so I got pulled out of the exiting line to go back and redo it. I’m honestly okay with that because as great as it was holding his hand i think it would have looked odd lol I walked back into the booth he was in and his back was to me, talking to the other people in the room. Once he realized I’d walked in he turned to me and smugly said “Oh! So you’re my blinker 😏” he was happy it was me! I immediately replied, “yeah. I swear I didn’t do it on purpose though,” and the whole room laughed 😆 so he pulled me in for another pic, and after he was done he gave me a really big hug, took my hands and looked very earnestly into my eyes when he told me “but for real, your hair is fantastic and you need to know that.” I said “you too, thank you again for everything.” We said goodbyes and I left. 🥰

I can’t say enough good things about Gabriel. Holy shit. He’s so kind and generous with his time, and cares about all of us so much!

[ratwizz]

All I draw everyday is adventure time self insert so blehhh :P I want some requests

I'll draw:

-my ocs :] there's info about them under the cut

-homestuuuuuuckkkk!!!

-penumbra podcast (Junoverse mainly but second citadel works :P)

-the magnus archives

-adventure time!! Fiona & cake too

-great omens

-ACE ATTORNEY

-IT

-horror movies in general

-moralton orelton

-falsettos 🛐🛐 (other musicals too if I know em :D)

-other fandoms too like fnaf, regular show, deltarune, bom musical, be more chill, ok ko, vocaloid, etc)

Okay so oc fun time!! Doing them in order of creation except julian is last

Also note, I have two oc universes one where it's just the world no fun or magic, and another where everyone has powers based on family line curses!!

Sydney Salts!! (she/her) She has a bajillion different haircuts, all done poorly in her bedroom late at night. I primarily draw angst of her because her story is very sad. She struggles feeling emotions for other people and it always hurts those around her, but she can't do anything about it. It's just apology after apology, empty room after empty room. But on her fun days she's super punk and all her clothes is made of hand me downs and trash!! Shes really into classical music and folk punk. She plays banjo, piano, synth, and guitar primarily. Sydney is SUPER FUCKING LOUD!!!! AND VERY IMPULSIVE. Notable things she has done

-gave herself an undercut with a man scaping tool

-tied her laces so tied her feet lost circulation for many hours

-chipped a young teen's tooth accidentally in the pit

-peed herself while playing hide n seek in an abandoned building cause she thought she saw a ghost

Also Sydney's power is super Hella OP. She can rearrange molecules of any connected object (including just like terrforming earth's crust if she connects to it) but it takes alot of strength and focus. Her family was cursed to be one with the earth, it started with them after a certain number of years of living they would start merging with the ground they stood on and become dirt but it's changed alot over the centuries. Sydney naturally couldn't focus her ability, but her mother worked as a power prosehtic designer and created brain plugs so she could directly connect with the objects she wants to manipulate.

Jun Kwak (he/she), Jun is my comfort oc and so I have not given her any life problems. She has it made. She's childhood friends with Meilin, since they both lived in a rich neighborhood. Since then Jun's family started having buisness problems and they moved to the ocean side to live a simpler life. Jun loves fishing, it's sweet and calm and let's him sit in peace. His plan is to build a tackle & bait store one day and spend the rest of his years on the beach. This isn't gonna work out cause plot but it's nice for now :) Jun is just a very chill and emotional but likes to goof on occasion.

Jun's family curse was to have an irresistible aroma. Jun though only produces a very subtle scent, which becomes more active in water. He mainly uses it to attract fish. The aroma he produces is affected by his health and mood so when really healthy or really during intense emotion it can affect people on land.

Mei Lin Qin (she/they) Mei Lin is very angry and very emotive. She grew up in a family who cared and loved eachother but did awful things to others. They stepped on the rest of the world to become more and more powerful. She wanted nothing to do with that so her family let her pursue her own career but blah blah plot stuff comes in. Mei Lin was super in love with Sydney but it wasn't healthy and they end up on polite acquaintance term for years. Eventually they grow and develop something of a QPR where they were both happy. Mei Lin is a gamer girl, but she only plays the most evil competitive FPS games. It fuels the menace inside her. Her and Julian have a strong friendship based on both being haters.

Her long ago ancestor was King Midas, which led her family to suffer but eventually prosper from the gold they could create. Since then the market has been overflown with gold so it's not longer so beloved. Still Meilin can produce gold as just excess on her body. Her nails are solid gold (she has a special procedure to cut it), she has natural gold in her hair, and she is very sparkly since she has gold in her pores (just trust me it works shh)

There are characters in Jun, Julian, Sydney And Mei lin's universe such as Alice (Sydney's ex and Julian's art bestie) and Aniel (a high fashion girl who took dance with Jun and Meilin as kids and they just keep running into) but I don't have much on them :P

This is Taylor (he/him) (black haired ghost loving incel) and Alec (any) (angry alien who acts like he knows human culture better than humans) they only exist in the non magic universe. Their whole thing is Taylor and Alec hate eachother through Cartoonishly shenanigans but fall in their own strange form of love. Taylor is really into ghost hunting and being inside all day on his pc setup. Alec is on earth for a personal vacation but is stranded cause he is very incompetent and also an asshole so nobody came after him. It's fun n goofy :] anytime I draw em I don't do them justice so there is little dooble.

Finally Julian Salts (he/him) , I put him last cause he's always the favorite on art fight, to my friends, and to myself. Hes angry and bitter about everything and guess what! It's your problem! Cause he's gonna bitch and moan!!! Hes super pretentious - nobody understands me - kind of artist and his perfered medium is clay sculpting. He acts all mad but he actually adores his sister (Sydney), boyfriend (Jun), and friends (Meilin and Alice) so much and that's what he usually scultps after. He only wears long skirts and sweaters with slight variation. He always has ram horns in the human and non human world. I feel like he'd look weird without them. No explanation it's just how it is. He also worked in customer service for like three months and blames that one why he's so grouchy but he was very much born this way.

His cursed family was just making them goats. Nobody knew his family was human before until the curse started dying out and the babies turned into human goat hybrids. His mom had a bad mutation and ended up dying soon after Julian's birth because of this. Julian is mostly human but he has hairy fricking legs and get scared like a sheep. His head is super tough too and his loved ones just throw shit at him because they know he can take it (he doesn't mind but acts like he does). His dad is totally human but also a dick so Julian is adopted by Sydney's family. He loves his life but will never admit it.

Okay the end :D

[perezzakhartaylor]

Boyd Holbrook NYCC experience!

Hello! Here is my full experience with Boyd Holbrook at NYCC last weekend! Hope this is coherent enough!

Tagging the following people so they see this (thank you for your interest!!): @andromedaceline @ecoustsaintmein​ @celestialmazer​ @killingdoll​ @hystericalroger​ @justafleshwoundbaby​

So I was first in line for his autograph line on Saturday morning. Waited in line for about an hour for him to show up. He nonchalantly arrives with his wonderful assistant who was handling the tickets and such. Boyd looks directly at me and says “Hi!” with the sweetest smile and I say “Hello! Good morning!” back to him. He then says hello to Melissa Navia who was signing autographs next to him on Saturday. After he gets situated and chats with his assistant for a couple seconds he looks at me and waves me over saying “Let’s do this!” I am fighting blacking out at this point because I can’t believe this is actually happening. I introduce myself, welcome him to the con, and tell him how happy I am that he was there. He tells me how excited he is to be at NYCC and can’t believe how many people are here. I let him know how much I love him in everything and how he killed it this year with The Sandman and Vengeance. He fist bumps me at this point and replies with an appreciative tone “Happy to have a supporter out there!” He asks me what I want to have him sign (I brought a Nightmare Country issue with my favorite cover to have him sign but I also wanted a picture signed too) and his assistant realizes they don’t have anything on the table and tells Boyd he’s going to go grab the pictures from the back.

Boyd taps on the table near me and says “You stay right here, we’ll hang for a bit while we get set up.” I try not to have an absolute meltdown over this and stay calm. I hand him the issue of Nightmare Country I had brought for him to sign so he could sign it while we wait. He looks at it confused and flips through it and asks “Is this a real thing?” and I say “Yeah! It’s a real comic book series running right now and it’s all about The Corinthian. He’s having a huge renaissance right now with the show and this comic book series.” He was so excited and he said “Could you imagine if we made a show with him by himself? I would love to do that!” and I said, “Yes! We NEED that. You were the perfect person to play him!” He said he’s happy people enjoyed the show so much because he gets disappointed when things don’t stick. That made me :(

His assistant came back with the photos and started putting them out, Boyd got up to help him and said “My dad was a coal miner. I have to stay humble.” His assistant had to go back and grab some more stuff so I continued the conversation with Boyd and helped him put the pictures out. Asked him how life was at the moment and some of the stuff he said was not too personal but things I’d rather not put on social media because he was being so chill and open to the moment with me. He also noticed my Corinthian shirt that I was wearing and said “THAT’S AWESOME!” (He also pointed it out to his assistant and said, ‘Isn’t her shirt awesome!?”) His assistant came back with the rest of the stuff and I had Boyd sign the below picture and told him to sign it however he wanted!

His assistant asked him if he’s up to do selfies and I said “Oh! Are you?!” and he was like “Sure! Absolutely!” and I asked him if we could take one. He came around his table and we took our selfie. 

Since he was already near me I asked him if I could have a hug (I wanted to shoot my shot!) and he told me ‘Of course! I am a huge hugger’ which made me absolutely melt and he gave me the biggest hug. I thanked him for being so amazing and wished him the best time the rest of the weekend and that I would see him at his photo OP the next day. He thanked me and said “See you tomorrow!” I let him move on to the next fan since I had already taken up so much of his time and finished up payment with his assistant and left. I was shook the rest of the day.

Sunday consisted my photo OP and I was one of the first in line for that. When we were moved into the photo booth with him I hyped him up by excitedly half-yelling: ‘Yeah, Boyd!” he looked at me and smiled before photos started with him. When it was my turn I said, “Can we please do the biggest hug?” and he said “Bring it!” and we did just that! I thanked him and left.

I wasn’t planning on having him sign the photo at the start of the day but the more I looked at it the more I said “I think I need to have him sign this!” So I waited until later in the day because I wanted people to have their time with him before I saw him again and went when his line starting winding down as the con was coming to an end. I gave him the picture to sign and he face lit up when he reacted with, “Wow! What a great picture!” and he grabbed a marker and immediately went to drawing a heart around us. 

He finished signing the rest of the picture and I thanked him again for coming to the convention, how he is my absolute favorite/how amazing he had been all weekend, and how I’m looking forward to whatever he was going to be in. He thanked me for all the love and gave me a fist bump as I left. As soon as I left the area and found a place to regroup I started tearing up. He was an absolute sweetheart the whole weekend with nothing but a gracious attitude and completely blew away all expectations I had about what I was going to experience with him. I am ride or die with him forever now! Hope you enjoyed reading this post! 

[chibitorra]

More nonsensical One Piece ramblings branching off my last post...

What if the people of the sky are actual angels... like actual disciples of the Gods.

The more I think about Eneru possibly having another God Zoan devil fruit like Luffy, the more I hope it’s true. It would just make so much sense! What if he came from a line of rulers from Birka that inherited this Godly devil fruit through the generations somehow? It would explain his insistence on being a God, and possibly why the so-called priests chose to follow him... maybe that’s why they’re called priests to begin with now that I think of it because maybe in Birka they were literal priests to a person with literal god powers.

And each sub-culture of Sky People could be disciples of a different God, as theorized in my last OP-related post. 

This is all purely speculation, but...

Lunarians worshiped Nika, God of the Sun (which could also explain why King was so adamant about seeing him again)

Shandorans worshiped the Earth God, but lost the devil fruit (possibly to Imu, who is very much still alive; could also be the big battle Calgara talks about that started the void century and almost wiped out all the Shandorans. Here’s a random screenshot that gave me chills just now.) EDIT: The name of the god is probably literally Vearth how did I not think of this sooner.

Skypieans maybe worshipped the forest god, which is why they might consider Upper Yard “Holy Land” This one is really a stretch but either way, if true, they seem to have also lost the devil fruit of their god.

And Birkans worship the God of Rain/Storms, which is now in possession of Eneru, a deranged, disillusioned individual who only seeks power. 

Like... yea the people of the sky started out representing angels because oohh people living in the sky must be from heaven!! But like... what if it’s so much deeper than just that? What if all of them are so much more important than we initially thought? 

I’ll leave off on the quote from the ponegliff “Hold the truth in your heart, keep your mouth silent. We are the ones who weave history with the ringing of the golden bell.” 

[ravenclaw-daydreams]

𝐭𝐨𝐬𝐬 𝐚 𝐜𝐨𝐢𝐧 | 𝐠𝐞𝐫𝐚𝐥𝐭 𝐨𝐟 𝐫𝐢𝐯𝐢𝐚

Warnings: Smut!! (18+ pretty please), language, adult themes.

Summary: Toss a coin to your witcher...

A/n: I would let this man do absolutely anything he wanted to me. :)

𝐘𝐎𝐔𝐑 small feet patted across the chamber, your feet molding to the cobblestone underneath your skin with every gentle step. Your slip gently caressed your body, the extra fabric flowing after you like a veil.

When he finally came into view, you had to do everything to restrain your throat from releasing a small 'aww' at the sight. There, slightly stirring, was your witcher, cuddled up under blankets to keep warm from the biting weather outside.

Bottles of rum and other liquor rested on the small table beside the bed, signaling that he was enjoying his time off before having to march off in the early hours of the morning to fight whatever monstrosity there was left to fight.

But for now, he was yours until he left again, all of him, every part. It might sound selfish if you said it out loud, but you wanted him all to yourself. To keep him in the confines of your chamber. All yours.

Alas, the Witcher could never be a caged bird, no matter how hard you wished he could be, but the nights like these made the time he was away from you all the more worth it.

You wreaked of elegance. Something that your Witcher strictly was not. Your slip looked like it was spun out of moonlight, the pure white tone almost glowing. Your hair was untamed, but neat all the same. You smelled like roses and chamomile. A goddess... perhaps that was why Geralt would continue to come back to you.

Silently, you approached his bed, gently uncovering his bear-like body, hoping he wouldn't stir because of the sudden temperature change. You simply crawled onto the bed, gently straddling his nude hips, letting your evening gown slip its way down your shoulder, exposing your upper half, your breasts now fully exposed, nipples now pebbled due to the chilled air that circulated the room.

You were in a playful mood, leaning over slightly, feeling your breasts lightly graze against his collarbone, only proving how much bigger he was than you in size, your lips placing soft butterfly-like kisses across his face. You scattered your lips over his scars, his eyelids, and lastly his forehead.

When you finally pulled back, blazing golden eyes met your own.

You gasped lowly in surprise, your hopes of him not waking yet shattered.

"You missed your queue," you smirked, your smile almost like a drug to the man underneath you.

"Forgive me. Although, I would be more than delighted to start from the beginning," he growled playfully, wrapping his arms around you and pulling you into his chest.

You giggled like a small child, before letting him flip you over, his hulking body now hovering over yours as he leaned down and gave you a passionate kiss on the lips, full of flame and desire.

Letting him slip his tongue into your mouth, your lips went pliant as you let him take what he wanted— what he needed. His hands roamed your body shamelessly, feeling every curve up like he was experiencing you for the first time.

His lips traveled to your neck and you wrapped your arms around what you could, one hand traveling up to his hair and grasping onto it as he sucked a brand new purple mark onto your flesh.

"You body," he grumbled in a thunderous and deep tone against the skin of your neck, "It never gets old."

You whined at his praise, the heat between your thighs warming up your body as you tried to rub your thighs together for friction, which didn't go unnoticed by Geralt.

"Aww, hush," he smirked, a devilish glint in his eyes, "Patience is a virtue that looks good on you."

You gave a small huff, but your attitude was promptly cut of by the sound of tearing fabric, your evening gown now nothing but sheds of cloth as the man above you tossed them to the side.

Just as you were about to protest, he pressed your lips to his eagerly, his hands exploring your breasts as you felt his skin fully pressed to yours, his height pinning you down as your eyes closed. The kiss was stealing your breath away.

You did your best to take back your stolen air when he pulled away, looking down at you with so much admiration, you thought you might burst.

“Take me, Witcher. Make me yours,” you pleaded, but unbeknownst to you, you already were his. Completely and undeniably.

But it became apparent that he needed to prove it. A love such as his needed to be described by not only words but also by touch. His one true love. A purpose. Something he longed for to couple with his chaotic, dutiful lifestyle.

“My dear. You already are,” the snow-whites of his teeth caught the firelight, his lips pulling back, a smile gracing his gruff features, “my perfect little dove.”

His hand gently grazed your cheek before you felt him line himself up with your aching, soaked core, and he huffed in amusement when he heard your breath hitch.

A beautiful flower all to himself. To please his cock, to keep him warm, to love him like no other could.

Slowly, you felt his tip pierce your veil. No matter how many times he had been inside you, it always felt like he was opening you up for the first time. You hissed, Geralt placing a comforting kiss to the tip of your nose.

Little by little, he pushed his large length into you, muttering praise and kissing you gently every time you made even the slightest noise of distress.

Finally; finally he was pushed in as far as he could go, your cunt gripping onto him like a vice as he took a moment to let you breathe and adjust, something he rarely did.

“Your so radiant. How could I have ever thought to pass up something like you?” You heard him say, which lead you to wonder if he truly meant to say it out loud.

Leaning over, his lips attached to your neck once again, licking and nibbling the dark spots littered across your skin. New, old, it didn’t matter.

“My perfect girl,” you felt him smile against your skin.

Suddenly, you felt him begin to unsheathe himself from your core, all the way to his tip, before slipping himself back in just as slowly as he took himself out.

You mewled at his actions, your nails digging into his back as he started a slow, calculated rhythm, taking you in the most delicious way possible.

All the while he muttered words of tenderness into your skin, “You always feel so perfect around me. Like you were made for me, my favorite body to lose myself in.”

This which was true. After the things he’s seen and done in his life, you were his faultless escape, a reminder of how beautiful life really could be.

Unhurriedly, (and almost unnoticeably), his pace began to pick up, his grunts and groans of pleasure mingling with your higher pitched moans and whines melodically, an ideal song of pleasure and passion.

Soon enough, he began to pound into you, and that was the point your brain went haywire, your moans increasing in volume as he took you selfishly. You scratched harshly into his back.

This only drove him to continue. The mixture of pleasure and pain was a perfect combination of everything he seemed to seek after.

Your fingers moved up his back, now into his tangled platinum mane, and he growled, his thrusts becoming harsher, driving himself into you vice like it was the last thing he would ever do.

"G-Geralt!" you moaned, your voice stuttering due to the brute force of his frantic, unrelenting, and punishing thrusts, "I- I lo-ve you!" your weak voice yipped, and everything stopped dead.

When you opened your eyes, you found his, his yellow eyes like a tiger's as he stared at you with a look you couldn't read. It was a spur-of-the-moment thing. But maybe that wasn't all that was.

"My dear, you have no idea how long I've longed to hear those words fall from your lips." he sighed, leaning down and capturing your soft lips with his.

Without warning, his thrusts resumed, and your world fell back into a spiral of pleasure once again.

"Say it again," he groaned into your ear, his deep voice like thunder, sending chills down your spine.

"I love you," you said with more confidence, a look of determination and lust crossing your features, Geralt watching as it did.

With renewed vigor, his pace resumed, the tip of his shaft banging into your g-spot with every brutish hit, your arms wrapped desperately around his large frame, nails digging into his scars and breath becoming ragged.

Suddenly, you felt the coil inside you tighten to the point it was almost painful, knowing that you were about to let go. Geralt understood the signs, sometimes you were convinced that he knew more about your own body than you did.

"Cum for me, petal, I want to feel you," he grunted, wiggling his hand down where both of your sweaty torsos conjoined until his large thumb found your dainty pearl.

He rubbed it in tight, quick circles as your eyes finally rolled back, your body shaking violently as you felt your sight turn a bright white. You fell into a state of ecstasy as he continued to rock you through it, the tightening of your slick cunt driving him over the edge, his balls constricting as he came deep inside of you.

You mewled at the warmth that bloomed in your core, Geralt's lips going into the crease of your neck, leaving soft kisses everywhere he could reach as you slowly found yourself coming back down to Earth.

Soon, all that could be heard were the soft breaths of the two lovers that laid exhausted on the bed. You loved the feeling of him in your arms as he did everything not to crush you, the white of his hair mingling with the tangles of yours.

Finally, he lifted himself out of you and you let out a whimper as he tried to ease the discomfort with a kiss to the nose. He flopped to the side of you, immediately pulling you in.

He held you tightly as you rested your head on his chest, his fingers gently trailing up and down your exposed arm. And you both sat in silence, reveling in the love you shared for one another.

"I missed you," you finally muttered, feeling your lover let out a low 'hmm' above you.

"As have I."

You opened your mouth to say something, but you stopped yourself, not knowing how he would react; if he would get offended.

"No, speak your mind, girl."

His commanding tone sent you straight to submission as you felt his fingers tilt your chin up to look at him.

"I'm just... afraid you won't be here when I wake up in the morning. The bed gets so cold, and I-"

You were cut off with a quick kiss to your lips, "Everything I do, I do for you. I used to only do what I did for coin, nothing more. But for you, I use the coin to take care of both you and I, the future that you and I both want."

"Truly?" you questioned.

"Truly," the witcher replied, sincerity lacing his voice, "After all, you said you loved me. Couldn't give that up, could I?" he smirked.

You tuned red, "No, it would be a shame if you did."

Geralt let out a chuckle at this, "You're stuck with me."

"I wouldn't have it any other way."

[palaceofpassion]

After arriving in Atlas, meeting Penny and her father then arrested Illia was worried. Then scared during the meeting with Ironwood he brought up a warrant that was placed on her last time she was an Atlas. Jaune placed himself between her and the Ace Ops, arguing in her defense. Oddly Weiss did the same. After some discussion it was decided that she would wear a tracking bracelet but otherwise we remain free. Before turning in Illia thanked Weiss but also ask her why? The weren't close at all.

"Arrest her!"

Today was not Ilia's day, she couldn't believe how many things had happened at once. From stealing an Airship just yesterday, to arriving in Atlas, to their robot? friend being alive! To then getting arrested by the Aceops, and now she was about to get arrested again and thrown into the Atlas slammer.

She knew that coming here was a bad idea. And now she had no where to run! Yet, even in her most harrowing of moments, her heart steeled itself with resolve. All because she had her best friend by her side. Jaune had quickly gotten in front of her, ready to defend her if need be.

"She's with us, she's not with the Fang anymore, and she helped with removing them."

Ironwood gave her a glance, one that chilled her to the very bone, the stare of a madman already on the edge. "Be that as it may. She's still a danger. We will keep her locked up till we can confirm that it's safe."

Then a voice she hadn't expected cut through the the following silence. "That shouldn't be necessary."

Weiss Schnee, of all people, stood besides Jaune, giving him a quick tap on the shoulder.

Ilia's eyes narrowed for a moment at the sudden sign of affection.

"Ilia's been through a lot with us already. She's aware of everything going on, including Salem. And yet she's stood by us instead of running away."

"That doesn't-"

To everyone's surprise, especially Winter's, Weiss didn't let him finish. "General, we could really use all the help we can in times like this. And having Ilia by our side would send a good message."

"She's got a great Semblance for espionage." Jaune chimed in, "And she's a trained combatant."

The bunny looking short woman chose to butt in, "You can't expect us to let this animal in here! Who knows what hse'll do."

"Alright."

"What!?"

Ironwood finally spoke, "I can see... that you are telling me the truth."

He took a step forward, and Ilia nearly took one back, "But there are going to be some caveats. One she will wear a bracelet tracker. She is free to go anywhere she wishes. However, we will know of her whereabouts."

Jaune didn't like this answer stepping forward only to be stopped as Weiss grabbed his hand, "What if it's booby trapped."

"General, I feel that's a bit over the line, isn't it?"

"Considering our situation? I think not. But you have my word, it is a tracker and only a tracker. I'll have Doctor Polendina handle it, as I believe you'd be more comfortable trusting him?"

Penny, thankfully chimed in, "I can vouch for the tech! Father would never do anything to harm a customer or someone in need."

"It'll only be on for the next week, I promise once things are sorted out, then we'll let her be for free."

Finally Jaune's stance lightened, "Thank you sir."

"No, thank you all. Having you here is... it's reassuring."

The bunny girl didn't seem to like that answer, as she stormed off fuming.

The larger woman seemed to shrug, giving Jaune a quick wink.

To Ilia's surprise, Weiss seemed to slightly growl at that.

Now she was getting suspicious.

Eventually they adjourned, Ilia would be bunking with Jaune and his team, as his partner.

Though before they all separated she needed to clear the air.

"Sch... Weiss, can I talk to you?"

Weiss seemed to hesitate for a moment.

"Yes."

But she eventually agreed.

"Why did you help me?"

Weiss bit her bottom lip, thinking about it herself.

"Because... because you've been there for Jaune, when none of us have... I... no we owe you that much at least. And... I suppose being as envious as I am, I wouldn't want to lose due to a technicality."

She gave no further answers simply turning around and leaving.

"Wait what?!"

[freckles-and-wings]

Transcript from Misha Collins M&G at #DLConline

“Cas has meant a great deal to many, especially LGBT fans have seen themselves in him over the years. So now that he has confessed his love for Dean, and seemingly come out, how do you feel about his confession?”

I feel mostly good about it. I talked to Berens, about this ending, a year and a half ago. It was a long time in the making. It was really important to him and really important to me. When he pitched me the storyline it gave me chills. I thought - this is awesome. This vindication and this expression of love - at the end - it makes it all worth it. I was really happy about it. You know, it’s interesting, there are some fans who are asexual who have taken solace in the fact that Cas hasn’t made this kind of declaration [before] so I feel bad that those fans might get a little bit alienated. However, I’m sure that a lot of them are also okay with this. There’s a trope in Hollywood of “kill the gays” and so Cas meeting with his demise only seconds after making this homosexual declaration of love fits into that fairly insidious trope, however, for some reason, that is, in my mind, not really as important as the declaration itself. I completely understand people being upset over that. I think that, in the end, of Supernatural, everyone is going to die. I’ve always known that, that’s not a spoiler, I’ve always known that, it’s how the show has to end. But how they die and what quality that death takes has resonance and importance in the Supernatural universe. I think… In the end, that won’t prove to be the lasting point of Castiel’s. I know the intention in the crafting of the story wasn’t to use the “kill the gays” trope. Could Cas have lived in the space of having made that declaration in relation to Dean for longer before dying? Perhaps. But there’s something so dramatically poignant about that particular moment and that particular exit… I don’t know, I’m now getting a little bit too heavy about it.

“I’m still seeing a lot of people online saying ‘oh no, that was totally platonic’. Misha, did you play it as romantic love, does that terminology even make sense for an angel?”

I was actually gonna write an op-ed about the character’s end. Then I decided not to, because I don’t really want the fictional narrative to be dictated by my analytical take on it. I want the story to live and breathe on its own for people to interpret as they want to interpret it. I could just lay down the line and say, “No, this is how it is… Your interpretation is wrong”. I know what Cas is thinking. I know what was going on in my head as I played that scene. I don’t think it was ambiguous. But there is… I guess I’m about to do what I said I wasn’t gonna do… I will say… We’ve always said, “People can interpret this however they want to interpret this. This is a work of fiction”. But I think we did things, we said things that were pretty unequivocal. There’s of course the whole issue of him being an angel, he’s an energetic being from a multidimensional… Or whatever that line was that Ben Edlund wrote about Cas. You know. What does that mean for an entity such as Cas? I suppose one could go down that intellectual rabbit hole. But I think we know what was going on there.

When do you think Cas knew he was in love with Dean? When did you know? Was it at the same time?

I mean… I’ve been playing it for a while. But I knew this was the ending for more than a year of shooting. I knew where the arc was taking us for that time. So Cas certainly knew it for at least a year. But… But you know, it also is an interesting thing to observe. He says, “The one thing I want is the one thing I can’t have” and I think repression is a very powerful tool. I think a lot of people live under such tightly-held repression. They don’t allow themselves to admit things. Often. In the real world. To an extent, that was happening with Cas. That’s my guess.

Did you have a discussion with Jensen about what the reaction would be?

I wish that I remembered more clearly the conversations that Jensen and I had about the ending. I don’t have a really vivid memory of that unfortunately. I do know that I was a little worried because I knew what the ending was long before he did and I think I was a little worried that he was gonna push back on it. If Jensen were to flip out, and said, “We’re not doing that”, we would have not been able to do it. I also think it was very honest to Dean’s character. I actually thought that was a very true [reaction].

If we had a chance to see it, how do you think Dean would have responded?

I don’t know. I honestly don’t know. We never discussed that. To be honest, I don’t think Dean reciprocated with romantic love. This is me speculating. I feel like I’m wading into waters I shouldn’t. This is my take, it’s not Cas’ take because Cas doesn’t know. I don’t know what’s going on in Dean’s head. I shouldn’t speculate. It wasn’t a contingent declaration. It wasn’t “I need you to love me back”, it was a very open-hearted, vulnerable and unconditional declaration.

What was reaction when you heard about the confession scene? 
My reaction was “Awesome”. I mean, my first reaction, when Bobo pitched me the idea, was “Oh my god”. I had chills. I was very happy. When I read the first draft… The first draft didn’t have the punch that it needed. I gave some notes. But I was still very happy that we were doing what we were doing.

[highdramas]

bandit like me | criminal!bucky

warnings: language, violence, references to criminal behavior, allusions to sexy shit, bucky being a cocky asshole

word count: 2197

summary: if you and bucky are doomed, you want to see the glorious fallout.

note: this is the start of a bucky au series which will eventually be based on the heist from oceans 8! this is just an intro to bucky’s history with the reader, and their dynamic, but i’m so excited to continue!

enjoy! <3

god, you love vegas.

there’s a certain sort of dirty glamour that you can’t find anywhere else, you think-- and while you spend the majority of your time in new york these days, you find that your heart always has a certain tug to las vegas. after all, it is where you got your start as one of the finest pickpockets and swindlers on either side of the mississippi.

among other things.

it’s where you met james buchanan barnes for the first time.

you’d heard his name like a whisper in the wind for years before you met him in person. james “bucky” barnes, criminal extraordinaire. of course, you were young, and you had stars in your eyes and you had not yet been hardened by the world. you had not yet had to kill your way out of a shady job, had not yet conned a man of everything he was worth.

that was your favorite part, you think.

taking from men what they had earned unfairly.

if justice wasn’t coming for them, you would bring it upon them yourself. you would take it all and you would feel no remorse. their wealth, their assets, their connections.

sometimes, even their wives.

but those were petty games that you had played when you were young. you like to believe that you are more mature now; both in your swindling and in your personality.

sometimes, you miss those days. you miss running with natasha and chewing up men and spitting them back out. you miss the high of pulling off a real good job. you miss watching a man crumble beneath you, begging for mercy. of course, you would never give it. but you would make a show of thinking about it, and natasha would laugh, and she would say, “stop playing with your food, honey.”

that’s another thing.

you rarely reveal your real name.

not even to your closest confidants. not even to natasha.

no, you find that there are two ways that you introduce yourself. you either stare straight with a narrow gaze, murmuring something along the lines of, “your worst nightmare.” or, you smile sweetly with an outstretched hand and your head gracefully tilted. “call me honey.”

there’s only one person that you’ve worked with who knows your real name.

and he’s sitting at the hotel bar.

already, you can feel your annoyance begin to bubble. you can do one of two things-- you can saunter over there and properly ignore him, knowing that he will notice you instantly. or, you can go up to your room.

you decide you need a drink more than you need your sanity.

somehow, you’re sure that he already knows you’re here. you approach the bar and tap on it, smiling at the bartender. “cosmopolitan.” you turn your head to the right and he’s already looking at you.

“i thought you’d never show, doll.”

a smirk begins to play on your lips, and you thank the bartender as you slide your drink to yourself. “i should get a restraining order,” you muse as you lift your glass to your lips, taking a lengthy sip. “you creep.”

bucky laughs and he takes a sip of his own drink, and you don’t even have to look to know what it is-- whiskey coke. god, you always gave him shit for it. told him he should at least drink his whiskey neat. he would always give you that same stupid smirk and he would say, “what, i can’t have a little sweet, honey?”

“that’d be no fun,” he says and god you know that he’s right, but you hate to admit it. “who you here for?”

all the attempts of not looking at him are futile, and you throw a glance in his direction. he looks as glorious and handsome as ever. the man drips with luxury. from his suit to his hair to his beard which has grown out slightly since the last time that you saw him-- everything about him tells you that he is expensive. “you think i’d tell you?”

“i’m here for pleasure, darling. i’m not going to infiltrate on your job.”

you scoff. “i have a hard time believing that. when are you ever not thinking about work?”

bucky’s desire to work is the cause of all of his success, as well as all of his problems, you think.

part of you feels sorry for him, knowing how much stress he places upon himself. another part of you can’t help but resent it, knowing it is the reason that you two would never, ever, ever possibly work as something more than easy flirtation and a good night between the sheets.

“i’m a changed man, honey.” bucky gestures to the barstool beside him. “you gonna stand and drink that all night?”

a pointed look is thrown in his direction and you finally take a seat. “you knew i would be here, didn’t you?”

“heard from nat,” bucky takes a sip from his drink. “i’ve got some intel on your hit.”

your hit isn’t your normal vegas regular. no, your hit is alexander pierce, one of the highest ranking government officials you could sink your claws into. you’d met him networking at an event in dc and he had been quite interested in you, which you always liked to use to your advantage. luring him out to las vegas took little effort and much amusement, buying you time to do your research.

you’d clear his room of all his belongings and sell off the paperwork to your government contacts who would purchase them for a steep price, and you would be on your way.

without a trace.

you were good at that part. going off the grid. no social media footprint, nothing to track you by-- you were living in the world partially invisible. you like to keep it that way.

though, sometimes it gets lonely.

no one knows that better than the man who sits beside you now.

“spit it out, then.”

bucky smiles and for a moment, you think he might say something else, but he begins to divulge quickly. information about his security detail, shift rotations. information you could’ve found out easily, but don’t mind having handed to you. but you’re less interested in that. your brows furrow as you look at him. “how far out of your way did you go to get this intel?”

he gives a nonchalant shrug. “far enough.” he smiles. “gotta help out my girl.”

“i’m not your girl,” you say with a smirk. “if anything, you’re my bitch. getting me intel, following me around to tell me.”

this gets a laugh out of him and you look forward again, finishing off your drink. “now that’s my girl.” he throws a hundred dollar bill onto the bartop and follows suit, tipping his head back to empty his cup of its contents. “walk with me?”

you stare and watch as he outstretches his hand to you. despite your better judgement, you take it. the pair of you walk side by side until you’re stepping out into the still warm air, but the breeze offers enough of a chill that the hairs on your arms stand up. bucky looks over at you and begins to shuck off his jacket, making you immediately protest. “bucky, no--”

but he’s already draping it over your shoulders, and you are tugging it just a bit closer to you, and you note that it smells like him. like that stupid ysl cologne you bought him all those years ago.

well, you didn’t buy it. you’d stolen it.

no words are exchanged as you move along on the sidewalk, watching on at people busking and performing on the street, ignoring the elsa’s and spiderman’s who try to pull you in for photo ops. one of them gets particularly aggressive and bucky pulls you into him, as if you’re not a woman who has driven a dagger into the gut of a man for far less, saying, “move along, pal.”

“so touchy tonight,” you purr, leaning into him slightly when he doesn’t remove his arm from your waist. “like the good ‘ole days.”

“oh, you remember?” bucky jokes, and it already has you laughing. “you were acting so coy back there in the bar, i thought that you might’ve forgotten me altogether.”

you shake your head and you stop in the street. you wear his jacket and he straightens his tie and he smiles down at you. “of course i didn’t.” you jut your chin up. “doesn’t change anything, though.”

what doesn’t it change, exactly?

it doesn’t change that the last time you saw james buchanan barnes, you had told him that you loved him. and he had told you that he loved you in return. and you had both agreed that it needed to end now before either of you caused irreversible damage to the other.

criminals being with criminals never ends well.

“not a thing,” he agrees with you. he pushes a piece of hair back and it’s getting harder to remember why you were so stubborn when it came to him. why, exactly, you felt the need to push your feelings away so desperately. “wish it would, though.”

“yeah.” a small, almost shy, smile works its way onto your lips. “me too.”

bucky’s jaw slacks and his fingers trail your cheek, and you can feel the cool metal of his rings against your flesh. “it’s not like this with other people, is it, honey?”

“of course not,” you nearly hiss. “is it like this with other people for you?”

bucky has a knowing sort of smirk. “no.” he wets his lips, his eyes settling on your lips for just a beat too long. “it never will be.”

the tension surrounds the both of you, and you’re the one to break it. you press your hand to bucky’s chest and push on it slightly, pushing him away, pushing away all of the feelings and confusion that comes with him. “we’re not doing this tonight. i’ve got a job to do in the morning.”

you begin to walk, and bucky is on your heels. “so our pillowtalk can be about work,” he says, and you can practically hear the cocky and sly charm in his words. “i made sure to get a king bed. and a bottle of moet.”

again, you stop, and you turn to him. you’ve nearly walked a circle around the block, and you can see the hotel not far off. “you really got info from nat about my job, got me intel to butter me up, and then want to take me to bed?” you huff and even you can’t help but laugh. “nothing’s changed, barnes.”

you set off again and he groans, following after you. “you know it’s not like that.” he catches your wrist and he spins you, getting you to face him. “it’s never that that… simple with you.”

you rip your wrist from his hand and make your way into the hotel lobby, making sure your hips swing just a bit more than usual. you remember bucky laughing and gripping those hips on a late winter night in new york city, nearly three years ago now-- “such a tease,” he had said into your ear.

“bucky,” you say as you both approach the elevators. “it’s not happening.”

he sighs and he hangs his head. “yeah.” he looks up at you. “i do miss you, doll.”

“yeah, i know.” the elevator doors open and you step into them. bucky tries to follow after you, but you hold your hand up. “i’ll be seeing you, james.”

“see you, honey.”

the doors click shut and you practically collapse. the effort of pretending to not love bucky is exhausting.

in a blur, you go to your room and unpack your things. you take off your makeup and your expensive jewelry that you plucked off the wrists and necks and fingers of random passing civilians during all of your worldly travels. when you pick your phone up, you notice that you have a text from an unknown number.

floor 45, room 7.

you roll your eyes and toss your phone back onto the bed. you’re a strong woman-- certainly strong enough to resist the temptation of knowing exactly where to find the one person that you want.

one hour passes. you scroll through instagram.

another. you finally crawl into bed.

three hours. it’s nearly three in the morning and you cannot sleep.

by four, your feet are in slippers and you wrap a silky robe around your body.

you don’t move. 4:30am blinks at you on the clock.

at five, bucky is opening the door, rubbing the sleep from his eyes and staring at you.

“don’t say a word,” you hiss before you’re grabbing for him, pulling him to you, and pressing your lips to his.

but bucky is a smug asshole. as you move through his suite, his hands are everywhere, and he pushes you back onto the bed. once he’s hovering over you, his lips just a ghost above the shell of your ear, he can’t help but whisper…

“looks like nothing’s changed.”

[alphabravocharliedelta]

Therefore I Am | Russell Adler x Bell! Reader IV

Series: Call of Duty: Black Ops Cold War

Therefore I Am | Russell Adler x Bell! Reader

Chapter IV

Word Count: 6900+

[Chapter III] [Chapter V]

Summary:  [Y/N] “Bell” [L/N] was content with dying. Shot by the person whom they admired and left to die, the world was now left in the hands of the team they once thought as family. However, it seems that fate had other plans in mind…

Content Warning: mature content, gore, vulgar language, blood, injuries

Notes: Things are getting juicy! A lot happens in this one since I merged two parts into one chapter, I just didn’t want to series to run on for too long. I’m glad you’re all enjoying it though! Hopefully there isn’t too many mistakes since I don’t look over what I write sometimes.

[Y/N] "Bell" [L/N]

July, 1983

CIA Safehouse, West Germany

After your meeting with Mason, it took another half week or so for everything to get back into order.

You had to go through a psychological evaluation, answering a tirade of questions about your personal mental health. At first you thought about lying just to fuck around, but decided against. It would have just added more problems to your already growing list, and you certainly didn't want to get pushed aside. They wouldn't show you the results and passed it off. Soon enough, you were free to go. 

The CIA basically had you on a leash. Someone had to keep an eye on you wherever you went, and the perfect way they went about it was to put you back under Adler's wing. You had nowhere else to go. 

Then again, it was time to refresh and flex your skills. Unfortunately, they didn't give you back your belongings. The pistol and vest you had was now gone. A bit of yourself felt a bit empty without it, but at least they took it upon themselves to throw away the sentimental baggage that you held onto for so long.

Adler had yet to make an appearance since the base. He wasn't even there on the plane ride to Germany, leaving you to travel with Lazar and Mason, whom both snored loudly. You didn't have much to bring with you other than the clothes on your back and a few care packages Mason had forced you to carry, saying something along the lines of Woods craving "a sad excuse for candy", which turned out to be a pack of Hershey's. 

As the ETA to the safehouse got closer, you couldn't help but dread the moment you had to walk through the metal shutters. What were you supposed to do? Act normal like nothing ever happened, and carry on with the day? That felt like the most obvious answer, and yet the thought of just having to work alongside him again made you both irritated and anxious.

The three of you arrived in West Berlin early in the morning, approximately at four a.m.. You could see the landing strip become dimly lit with the ground lights, as well as the control tower poking out in the distance. The airport was rather quiet and not busy as you had anticipated. A nice chill met your exposed skin as you walked out of the aircraft, and you felt Lazar placing a hand on your shoulder.

“Welcome back, Bell.”

Orange streaks poked through the sky by the time you arrived. The outside of the safehouse looked no different since the last time you laid eyes on it. 

It was still anchored in its spot, not a leaf out of place. However, the inside felt so foreign, as there were things now occupying the spaces that were once empty. A couple of more metal tables were placed around the main area, and there were now a couple of towers made from file boxes. It felt a bit more cramped because of it, and you almost knocked some over on your way out. At the same time, though, more cozy at least. 

First thing you did was get a haircut. More specifically, Sims took it upon himself to give you one once he arrived. He wasn't a professional or anything but he does a decent job, surprisingly. Your head felt significantly lighter.

Going to drop off your bags, your room was left untouched by time. It was lightly furnished, your bed was shoved into the corner with fresh sheets pulled over it. A wooden table was pushed against the wall near the door, drawers empty. On top of it, there was a Swiss watch. It seemed fairly new, but there were a few nicks and scratches on the glass cover that gave its age away. The leather strap had light creases, and it stretched out as you secured it around your wrist. Someone already took it upon themselves to adjust the time.

That was when you noticed a small rectangular package that was sitting next to it.

It was wrapped in brown paper, and pulling back the tape, it unfolded and revealed a bunch of old newspapers that served as wrapping paper. Perplexed, you ripped them off, and found a weird device. Wrapped around it was some kind of wiring. Sifting through the papers for some sort of explanation, you search for a note of some kind but to no avail. You never seen something like it before, and asked around the safehouse (except him) what it was. They told you it was recently produced, and that it was basically a portable cassette player. No one seemed to know who gave it to you, or if they knew, they wouldn't reveal it to you. Whoever it was, you were thankful for. 

Having music blasted into your ears couldn't be more reassuring. The voices were drowned out, and you were able to just listen to the noise of musical instruments and heart-moving vocals. You found it easier to focus in this state. 

There weren't a lot of selections on the tape, and they were also from different genres. You listened to all of them on loop multiple times, even when falling asleep. Seeing how Sims was the supply man around here, you would probably have to ask him about it later. If he was generous enough, you'll see. 

Though, in return, you couldn't hear the talk going around the safehouse. If anyone needed your attention, they would need to tap you on the shoulder, or wave a hand in your view. You developed the ability to roughly read lips so you didn't need to take off your earphones as much, but if anything happened outside your peripherals, you didn't notice.

As for Adler, right when you set eyes on each other, it was like you both, begrudgingly, made a silent pact to avoid each other as much as possible. If one of you happened to be nearby, either you or him would make a detour. And if it just so happened that he needed to talk to you, he would send someone else in his stead to deliver papers or to just advise on what you needed to do next. Sims refused to be the messenger after the second time, and you even saw him talking to Adler in the back corner telling him to suck it up.

“How old are you again? Because this is getting ridiculous. You’re going to have to get used to working with them again, or I will formally write both of you up for therapy,” you heard him say.

Three days after your arrival, a briefing was finally held at twelve o' clock sharp, 

You took a seat on one of the metal stools near the radio station, rotating the knob around and listening to the music stations. Most of them were static, as there wasn't a definitive signal in these parts. Unable to come to a decision, you flipped it off.

Hudson comes around, giving you a small nod when he noticed you had already joined up in front of the board. Everyone else gathered, pulling out stools or sitting on top of the table. You had to nudge Woods to the side just so you could get a view of the evidence that was being put up.

"Finally got ourselves a mission,” Hudson starts. “Our sources informed us about more intel on Soviet activity regarding a catastrophic weapon, and it has Perseus written all over it. Detonating the nukes failed, so this is probably Plan B. As for what, when and where, we don't know yet. With the intel we’re going to obtain, we can find out. The bastard’s been lying low for the longest time, so it’s about time.” 

Hudson points directly at you with the marker in his hand.

"Bell, you're in on this one."

You perked up immediately as Hudson mentioned your name, taking out your earphones. It almost felt unbelievable. After months without having anything to do, you finally had the opportunity for some action, and the first thing was being deployed on a mission. It felt like a welcome back gift from Hudson in a way. Or maybe it was his way of apologizing. With that man, you could never tell. 

"You'll be providing distance support with Woods as Adler and Mason go in to snag our prize."

You nod, fixing your posture. Truth be told, you weren't exactly paying attention, since you expected just to stay in West Berlin. But now things were different. 

“As for where, you’ll be going back to East Berlin. The Iron Curtain is still strong, and security is tighter than ever since last time. The two groups will enter through different ways, more details on that later. You’ll both head to this area—” Hudson circles a place on the map, just between East Berlin and the border of Poland. 

“You’re going in light. You'll be dressed as civilians, and the CIA informant I mentioned will meet you here, get the guns you need. From there, it’s all or nothing. Try not to cause mayhem.” He tosses the marker onto the desk. “Questions?”

"Yeah, I have one. Any reason as to why you need Bell on this one?"

All eyes turned to the speaker, which was none other than Adler. You gritted your teeth, annoyance already beginning to make its rounds. Of course he would pull something like this.

"Is there a reason as to why we shouldn't?" Hudson replies coolly. "Bell already proved themselves back at Solovetsky. That's enough for me."

"Yeah, what the idea, Adler?" Woods challenged, hopping off the table he sat on. He strided over to Adler, confronting him face to face. "Something wrong with Bell?"

"Bell hasn't exactly had the healthiest of minds as of lately,” Adler states coldly, getting up from his seat to meet Woods eye to eye. “One fatal mistake and the mission's compromised."

"It's not like Bell was given a choice on that matter, considering what you've all done," Mason joins in with a blatant distaste. "Unless… there's something else you’re hiding."

Adler shot a glance towards your direction, and you sent him a death stare in return. He contemplated for a moment, before backing down against Woods. 

You couldn't tell what was going on inside that mind inside of his and you hated it. You couldn’t even catch a breath whenever he was around, and his mere presence or thought of him agitated you. Despite pledging to yourself not to let him get an advantage over you, he never failed to piss you off in some form.  

"Bell's going on the mission, Adler, whether you like it or not. Work as a team. They didn't go through a psych evaluation for fun," Hudson affirms. "You all leave the first week of August."

Once the meeting was dismissed, you put your earphones back on, turning the music back to its max volume. You grabbed a small roll of bandages from the back storage, wrapping them around your hands as. The punching bag seemed like a great idea at the moment for blowing off steam, and you headed over before you could bash a wall in. 

Testing the weight of it, you propel it away from you, stopping it when it returns. Getting used to it, you gave it a final push.

When it rounded towards you, you sent a clean jab to its side and watched it recoil upon impact. 

You continued this cycle, increasing your hits each time as you relinquished your anger. What the hell was his problem?

There was a tap on your shoulder, causing you to jump. You resisted the urge to instinctively draw back a fist, instead holding it at your side.

Turning around, you found Woods waiting patiently with a stern, but intrigued, expression.

"What is wrong with you?" you growl.

"You're going to go deaf with that shit blasting in your ears. I could hear it a mile away," he advised.

"Is that what you came here to tell me?" You return back to the bag as Woods just took a seat on top of the table nearby.

"You gotta put more 'oomph' into it, Bell. Put the hips to work."

"If I wanted tips, I would ask Sims." 

Regardless, you adjusted accordingly and delivered a series of jabs and hooks to the bag in front of you. Although better, there was still room for improvement. But, you couldn't concentrate now with Woods silently judging you with crossed arms, but you obeyed every suggestion he gave. Put your weight more on the tips of your toes, keep moving, etcetera. Sweat was already beginning to run down your forehead, your shirt sticking to your skin and the threads of the bandages fraying.

Heaving, you stop assaulting the bag when you start to feel your chest constrict. Something white flashes just outside your peripherals, and you quickly catch the towel Woods tossed. 

"Why don't you take a break and talk with me for a bit?" 

Sighing exasperatedly, you pull out your left earbud and you unwrap the bandages. He was unusually persistent today, but you knew he was too stubborn to be ignored. "Okay, let's hear it."

"Well, to start off, you looked kinda pissed earlier."

"Did I?" you questioned curtly, flexing your fingers. "Maybe I just have that kind of face."

"Don't be a stick in the mud, it wouldn't kill you to talk about it. You know me, I can keep secrets."

"Because you're the expert in quiet."

"Of course I–" He cuts himself off in realization. "Did Mason tell you that?"

"Probably."

"Goddammit," he swears under his breath. "Anyways, Bell. Let's talk."

You hummed in response. Mason did say he was a good listener. No wonder they were buddies. "Before we do, tell me what happened to Mason. He said he went through the same shit I did."

"Weird way to start off, but yeah, it’s some fucked up stuff, really." He hands you a water bottle, which chug instantly. "Mason was originally brainwashed to be a sleeper agent for the commies. They gave him the ability to read some sort of numbers. I don’t really get it myself, but Hudson and Weaver were getting desperate, and needed to find out what they were. They strapped him into a chair… gave him a harsh time. That kind of crap."

You wipe away excess water from the corner of your mouth. "Sounds like you guys go far back."

Woods chuckles. "'Far back doesn't even cover it." 

"Why do you want to talk, anyway? Before, I was the one to initiate the conversation."

"I just want to get up to date with you," he claims, although you could detect some kind of hidden intention behind his words.

You roll your eyes. "I'm serious, Woods. Did Adler put you up to this?"

"It always goes back to Adler doesn't it? You asked Mason the same thing." 

“And if I did?” 

"Just talk to the guy he’s really bothering you. Hell, I’ll turn a blind eye if you happen to sock him in the jaw again.”

You smirk at his thoughtfulness. “Inciting violence in the workplace now?”

“Don’t tell Hudson,” Woods jokes. “But, in all seriousness Bell, what's up?”

"Nothing." You eyed him for a bit. He had a raised brow and tapping a finger, just waiting for you to tell him anything. It was clear that he didn't plan on leaving you alone, so you took a seat on the floor. "You should learn how to mind your own business."

"Come on.”

"No."

“I’m not going to shut up until you do.”

"Fine." You lower your voice just enough so Woods could hear. It took a bit to force the words out, but knowing the type of guy Woods was, you felt a bit more confident. "Truth be told, I… don't think Adler's exactly happy to have me back."

"How so?"

"You're kidding, right?" You scoff. "You saw what happened earlier. Bossman didn't even want me on the mission."

"A dick move on his part."

"No shit." You gave a heavy sigh. "I-I don't know. It's what I expected, but it still hurts. Like, I worked with the guy, and he shoots me in the end… Maybe a small part of me expected him to be a bit apologetic."

"When you've been doing this kind of work for years, you'll experience some stuff. By all means I'm not defending him, but seeing a body you got rid of come back to life isn't exactly easy to come to terms with."

You roll your eyes. "Wow, I feel so much better."

“Hear me out, Bell,” he starts, and you prepared yourself mentally for a long talk. “When you were MIA, there was a part of me that wished you were alive. Even being told that you had supposedly ran back to Red, it didn't feel like you would do that, you know? But we had no other choice but to accept it as reality. 

"Hudson dismissed the team shortly after that. We went back home, left the safehouse behind for a good year and a half, we thought our work was done. Then we got a call, saying that there's been suspicious activity relating to Perseus going amuck, and then fast forward to today, we’re back where we started. The place felt a bit empty without you, kid."

"You missed me?"

"Fuck yeah we did! Having someone a bit younger on the team really livens up the mood don't you think? Another newbie to bully a bit. So think of this as making up for lost time."

"That's nice to hear, I guess."

Woods scratches the back of his head. Talking to you was harder than he thought, especially since you were so adamant on hating Adler. It wasn't his job to maintain your relationships in the workplace, sure, but you having this mindset would hurt yourself and everyone else in the long run. Plus, he hated seeing you like this.

"I'm sure Adler's just trying to wrap his head around this,” he comes to say. “Just give him time. He was ordered to kill one of his own, after all."

"On the contrary, isn't it me that should be 'given time'?” you challenged. “I'm the one that took the bullet, not him. It's his fault for being a lousy shot, and me being here is the consequences of his own actions."

Why should you give Adler the benefit of the doubt? Clearly he didn't feel any remorse for what he did. While you have yet to speak a word to him, it felt like he personally had it out for you. Adler should have to deal with you, not the other way around. And the stunt from earlier further proved your point.

"Just think about it, Bell. We all have our own emotional baggage. I'm not saying that yours isn't important, but everyone has their own shit to deal with. What I'm saying is to just let things play out. You never know."

"Because you definitely have the experience of being presumed dead by your best friends," you utter sarcastically under your breath. 

Admittedly, hearing everyone's stories so far about how they felt during your absence was heartwarming. You thought it would be awkward trying to settle back in, but instead they all welcomed you back with open arms despite the lies they've been told. 

Woods’s expression drops slightly, like he had just remembered an unpleasant memory. "Well…"

You perk up, raising your eyebrows, suddenly a bit interested in hearing his story.  "...You're joking."

He smiles wryly. “You know Kravchenko, right? Had a bit of an encounter with the man, and needless to say, he’s on my shitlist now. Mason and I have it in for him, that guy is dead the moment we see him.”

“What happened?” 

The veteran adjusts his sitting position, leaning back on his hands and giving out a loud sigh.

“We were caught by a few Viet Cong soldiers, forced to play Russian roulette. Scariest fucking thing I’ve done, you Russians are deranged as hell. But, we managed to make it out of there and turned the place into a living hell. Then, there was Kravncheko, beating the shit out of Mason, so I stabbed the fucker in the back. And he still wouldn't kick the bucket, and decided to pull a damn grenade. So, I took him on a trip, right out the window."

"You survived?" you say in awe. Woods really had a way of telling stories.

"I ain't dying to the likes of him! But, he came to first, and then threw me into a POW camp, before shipping me off to Da Nang. But I wasn't going to fucking die in that shithole, so here I am now."

"Hm, I guess we have something in common now,” you grin.

"Well, now that I told you some of my history…" Woods hops off the table to sit beside you. He props a knee up to rest his arm on, and it reminded you of a child who's excited for a bedtime story. "You need to share some of yours."

You gave a dry laugh, shaking your head. "...You set me up for this."

"C'mon. Sharing is caring."

"I'm not a storyteller."

"Well you are now."

0000

“Bell sure has taken a liking to the Walkman.”

Adler looked up from his station, and found Lazar standing across from him. 

Taking a peek over in your direction, you sat alongside Woods near the punching bag. You were both exchanging something he didn’t know about, and even saw Woods giving him a few glares over the shoulder. Shortly after though, the conversation turned lighthearted, both of you laughing at something.

"Mason!" you shouted. "Did I ever tell you about the time where Woods assaulted the mannequin?!"

Woods jumped up. "Bell! What the fuck?!"

"Oh shit, sorry."

The Walkman Lazar referred to was poking out of your back pocket, playing whatever cassette tape inside. A wire poked out from the end of it, before parting into two, leading to your ears.

“What about it?” Adler says flatly, before resuming his work on the mission files.

You haven’t spoken a word to him. Not one bit. Even after he questioned Hudson's choices. Whenever he did talk to you, if he even tried to, you would only nod or shake your head in response to him, and the only time you would look at him was to scowl. He noticed you would flinch slightly at the tone of his voice, and he couldn’t help but feel a little guilty about it. Or how you would lock the door whenever you went to rest. 

Not only that, but it was clear that you were talking to everyone else but him. It had taken some time for you to warm up to the rest of the members again, but it was noticeable that you were closer to Lazar and Mason. While they weren't full blown paragraphs, you would engage in brief conversations with them frequently. You were on close terms with Woods and Mason, and Sims was decent. For Hudson, at least, whenever he dropped by, you answered with single word statements. And you hated Hudson.

So if you hated Hudson, how did you feel about him?

“You haven’t been exactly doing your best at trying to reconnect with Bell either, you know,” Lazar points out, before taking another bite from his food. 

“Are you implying that I take initiative instead?”

Lazar shrugs. “If what you call earlier 'taking initiative', you need a new approach.”

Adler had nailed it relentlessly into you that you’ve known him and Sims since Vietnam, but the truth was that you only knew each other for a few months. He couldn't exactly waltz up to you, declare an apology, and expect everything to be how it was before you found out. So, he could only hope you were faring well, or managing a way to deal with it all.

"I'll think about it," was all he said. 

"If you say so. You need ideas? Let me know." Lazar was about to walk away, before pausing and turning back. "Drinks tonight?"

"Ask Woods. He's been dying for one."

Lazar laughed before departing.

Thinking about what he had told him, Adler couldn't help but feel a little spark of relief. If one were to look closely enough, the corners of his mouth were upturned slightly in a smile. It wasn't noticeable to the naked eye, but it was there. 

He was the one who left you the Walkman after all, so to hear that you favored it dearly was a plus one in his books.

0000

Giving out a loud yawn, you slapped your cheeks trying to keep yourself awake.

It was now the first week of August, and it was just your luck that you couldn't get a good night's sleep the day prior. As exhausted as you were, you've been looking forward to getting back onto the field. Hopefully you weren't as rusty as Woods claimed.

"I'm surprised you never shot the asshole yet."

You looked up from your scope at the building across from you, where Woods sat comfortably. Adjusting your grip on the rifle, you resumed to survey the streets below you, noting the positions of bystanders and patrolling guards. 

"Shot who?"

Berlin was just as depressing as it was the last time you were there for the Volkov mission. Sneaking through the U-Bahn, meeting up with Greta Keller and her asking you of a favor; breaking into the apartment due to Lazar (graciously) volunteering you, only to be compromised thanks to Lukas Richter, whom you let free beforehand. The dark side of you would have loved to put a bullet through the backstabbing traitor, but Belikov did the job for you (unfortunately).

“Damaged goods.”

You worked with Adler on that mission.

“Oh.” You had answered your own question. “Truth be told, the thought never really crossed my mind. But, now that you mentioned it…”

You adjust your position, now looking down at an alleyway a good distance from where you were perched. You trained your crosshair to be about the height of a six foot male, pointing it directly at the corner of the wall. 

“You’re sick, Bell,” Woods’ voice echoed in your earpiece. “You know that?”

“Bastard did say that I didn’t have ‘the healthiest of minds’,” you retort, doing an awful mimicry of Adler’s voice. 

“I can hear you.”

Good.

"It's Mason. Look sharp, we're in position."

The building of interest wasn't as large as you thought it would be. Apparently it's an old apartment building with a clothing shop on the first floor. There were no occupants, most likely forced to relocate upon the start of the war. 

Zooming out, you see Mason and Adler round the corners on opposite sides of the building, wearing the uniforms of local police. Mason was on the left side, and Adler on the right. They took positions next to the door. You could hear Adler countdown, and you held your breath as they both opened their doors simultaneously, peeking inside before slithering in and shutting the door.

“First floor clear. Moving to second.”

Your vision was limited, but you kept an eye on the windows on each floor, waiting for any suspicious activity. Everything was going smoothly so far, the duo having no issues as they continued up the building. 

You saw something shift. “Heads up, movement on the fourth floor,” you utter into your earpiece. 

“Got it,” Adler confirms over comms. 

After a moment of time passed, the weather started to turn sour. It almost seemed like the weather reflected the mood of the people: the skies completely dark and rain continuously pouring. The rumbling cracks of thunder rolled in following the flashes of lightning. You winced at the first clap of thunder.

“Don’t tell me you're afraid of a little thunder, kiddo,” Woods taunts from his end. 

“I was just caught off guard.” 

“Third and fourth floor clear.”

Mason and Adler rendezvous on the fourth floor, and you could see Mason drag a body out of view as Adler closed the door. They converged in the middle of the room, but a wall blocked your view. 

“What the hell? Is this what we came here for?” Mason voiced in disappointment.

“Why, what is it?” 

You couldn’t hear the reply over the clap of thunder. The hairs on the back of your neck stood up. You felt uneasy, the operation was going by too smoothly. The guards around the area never so budged from their spot, instead chatting away with their partners, or too busy being held up on unsuspecting bypassers. You wiped away the raindrops from your scope using your finger, before taking the chance to sweep another view of the streets once again.

Another flash of white and a clap of thunder. 

"Mason, Adler? What's the hold up?" Woods asks. You both waited for a response, only to hear static. He repeated the question again with more urgency. 

Nothing again.

"Shit…" you cuss under your breath. You couldn't see anything from the window. 

Looking at your watch, the team was supposed to meet at the extraction point in twenty-five minutes. From there, you would be taken back to West Berlin. But Mason nor Adler had confirmed anything, and you were all going to fall behind schedule at this point.

Contemplating the choices, you folded the bipod for your rifle. You wouldn't have time to dismantle the attachments, so you threw the strap around your shoulders to let it hang from your back. Whipping out your sidearm, you loaded in a few bullets and adjusted the silencer at the end. 

“Woods, I’m going in,” you announce, already dashing towards the edge of the roof. “Cover me.”

“Dammit Bell, wait—”

“Don’t worry about it. I got this.”

Vaulting over the edge, you slide downwards on top of a metal shed, before landing on a balcony. You cursed silently as your equipment banged and jingled with every movement you made. Praying that the Stasi had horrible hearing, you lean over the rail, checking to see if there was anyone patrolling under you. With the coast clear, you tested the strength of a nearby pipe before climbing down on it. 

You could feel it just waiting to give out any moment, but you made it down without any trouble. Landing with a thud, the alley was dark, scarcely illuminated by the streetlights. Rain was pouring down, the sound of the droplets hitting the pavement covering your tracks. 

Rounding the corner, one soldier stood alone. They had a cigar in their mouth, and you could smell the fumes making its way your direction. The smell of nicotine and tobacco made you sick to the stomach for some reason. You waited for the next boom of thunder to occur, and when it did you snuck up behind them. 

Covering their mouth and having a good choke hold on them, you dragged them back into the depths of the alley where light couldn't reach, before snapping their neck. You put the body inside a nearby bin, and continued on your way.

"Woods, how's it looking over there?" you whisper.

"Still no sight of them. Are you sure you got this?"

"This is me we're talking about."

You stuck close to the walls, making sure to avoid any well lit areas. The clothing shop was just across the street, and you didn't have a clear path. Clicking your tongue in annoyance, you looked for any other possible routes nearby. A couple of patrol cars were lined up alongside a makeshift barricade towards your right. There were two figures sitting on the hood of one of them.

"Hey, need your help on something. At your four o'clock. Two on the car. You take the one on the left."

"Got it."

"On my mark…" you began to count down, steadying your crosshairs onto their head. The rumbling of thunder started to go off as you held your breath to steady your aim. "Now!"

The thunder drowned out the sound of the silencers, and you quickly ran over to the cars as lightning flashed. 

"Good hit."

Working quick, you pulled both of their bodies off the car and shoved them under it, tucking their arms and legs in. The rain was already cleaning the blood off the car, not noticeable from a distance.

You let yourself catch a breath before moving behind the next car. Peeking over the trunk, you could see that the attentions of a couple police officers were pointing towards the general area of Woods position, and you prompted him to move to a different area. "They got eyes on you Woods, try find a better area before they start moving."

“Well, time to pack it up. You’ll be on your own for a bit, kid.”

Entering the shop, there were racks of clothing pushed up on the sides. A few shirts were strewn across the ground, and the cash register was propped open and rusty. The lights were off, the streetlights casting a dim glow inside. An open door was behind the counter, leading to a flight of stairs. 

Going up, all the doors leading to each floor were wide open, and taking a peek inside, there was no one. It was eerily quiet, to a point where your light footsteps echoed. The building appeared smaller when you viewed it from afar, but travelling up 

Pulling the door open to a crack, you peered inside and saw that a group of Stasi were gathered around something on the floor. They were speaking erratically in German, trying to figure out what to do. Leaning in a bit more, you realize that they were surrounding the Adler and Mason, who were on the floor. They weren't moving at all.

Were they dead? 

No, there was no way. They wouldn't go down without a fight. But the simple thought of it made you sick to your stomach.

Whipping out a flashbang, you ripped the door open and threw it in as hard as you can. A blinding light flashed before you. Squinting through the brightness, you took the one closest to you as hostage, letting them absorb any bullets that fly your direction. You popped one shot into each of the guards, four in total, before adding your makeshift bulletproof jacket to the pile. They fell to the ground, clutching their chests as they drew their final breath. You stepped over them, kicking their arms aside. 

“Well, I found them.”

“How do they look?”

Adler and Mason remained unmoving as you got to them. Squatting, you leaned close to check if they were still breathing.

You gave a sigh of relief. “Unconscious.”

“Well we don’t have all night, Bell. Wake ‘em up, I hear police cars approaching the area.”

“Yeah, give me a couple minutes.”

You brought your hand up to Adler’s face, about to deliver a good slap to wake him up, but you stopped midway, noticing his rather peaceful expression despite the situation.

There were strands out of place from his normally styled hair, and his sunglasses were just about to slip right off the tip of his nose. Finally, the man was quiet. But, you had to admit, the more you looked at him, you couldn't help but find him rather–

What the fuck is wrong with me?

This was the guy that tried to kill you. The one that didn’t want you on the damn mission. And yet why did you feel this way? 

Brushing aside your thoughts, you propped Adler against the wall, only to notice that there was a hole in his side. Lifting up his shirt, there was a bullet wedged inside him. It wasn’t lodged in too deep and didn’t hit any important arteries or parts. You whipped out your med kit, pulling out a large gauze pad and some tape. 

"Bell?"

Adler stirred awake on his own as you worked on him. You didn't even notice him becoming conscious until he groaned and adjusted his weight. His hand shot towards his side instinctively as you applied pressure but you slapped it away. 

"Glad to know you still care at least," he comments in amusement as you cleaned the area.

"Don’t patronize me."

A look of astonishment played on Adler’s face as you scowled at him. You just spoke to him.

As much as you wanted to argue with the guy, you slapped the gauze over his abdomen, securing it tightly with tape before bringing out your roll of bandages. It wasn't the best of treatments, so he would have to fix it up back at the safehouse.

"Are we on speaking terms again?"

"Don't make me regret my decision,” you spat. 

You couldn't stand it. The silent treatment you were giving him was already difficult to maintain with Adler always having some kind of remark or witty statement at his disposal, and your first instinct was to retort back with any insult that came to mind. 

And with that, you purposely tightened the knot of Adler's bandage, gaining a little satisfaction seeing him wince. "Ouch."

"God you never shut up, do you?"

Though, you had to admit, it felt a bit more relaxing to finally talk to him.

You moved over to Mason, giving his face a few slaps. It took a bit, but he stirred awake, his hand automatically going to touch the back of his head. "Ugh, the hell?"

"Get up, don't have much time." You pass him his rifle, pulling the lever back for him. Mason groggily got up to his feet, taking the gun out of your hands. "Woods, how's it looking out there?"

"They're making a barricade around the area. Our escape route is blocked."

"Well shit," Mason chimes in. "How long until exfil?"

Adler looks at his watch. "Five minutes. Not enough time."

"Well, we'll just have to make do, don't we?" You kick one of the downed rifles towards Adler. 

He picks it up all while maintaining a stony expression. You could tell he was resisting the urge to lecture you, but had the decency to pick his own fights. 

Adler hops right back up, even taking the time to brush himself off. "How do I look?"

"Pathetic," you remark.

"Are you two done flirting?" Mason yells from the stairwell, sticking his head through the door. 

The three of you urgently made your way down, taking a bit of a shortcut by vaulting over the railing.

"There should be a car nearby," you tell them. "Woods, meet us at the coffee shop around the corner, we'll do a drive by."

“Well you better haul ass, cause we got friends!”

Running out to the street, Adler and Mason follow your lead while keeping their weapons up. The rain showed no signs of letting up, and the police sirens were getting closer. You went to the nearest car and pulled at the door handle. "Of course it's locked," you hiss under your breath. 

You break the window using your elbow and reach in to unlock the door. Some idiot left the keys inside the car so you slid it into the ignition and revved it awake. "Get in!"

Slamming on the gas, you didn’t give them the chance to close the door as the car lurched forward. The tires screeched loudly under you, leaving marks on the pavement as you sped off. Red and blue lights flooded the darkness, and you turned the wheel sharply to avoid the building. 

“Mason, get your door open! Woods is going to be on that side!” you bark over the gunfire. You hear the rear window being pelted relentlessly, Adler and Mason ducking to avoid the bullets. He forcibly kicks the door open, but it just breaks right off and strays away as you drove down the street.

“The zone’s too hot! Woods might as well be a beehive if he tries to jump in here!” Adler exclaims while reloading. 

You dove your hands to your side, fishing out a small C4 and handing it over to him. “Try not to shoot at me this time around, will you?”

“Very funny.”

Adler uses the butt of his rifle to knock out the remaining glass from the back window. Seeing a good opportunity, he tosses the C4 out, and shoots it with perfect precision. Orange and yellow raged outward in the air, shaking the entire vehicle and causing you to swerve a bit. From the mirror, you could see a couple of police cars flip over.

The coffee shop was just a click away, and you could see Woods taking cover behind a raised flower bed made from stacked bricks. You honked the horn to let him know of your presence, and he poked his head out.

You slam on the breaks while gassing at the same time, tugging the wheel towards the left and bringing the car to a small drift. It stops in front of Woods, who dives right in while giving out a cheer.

"Nice driving, Bell!” 

And with everyone back together, you speed off into the night, leaving behind another mess once again in East Berlin. Hudson wouldn't be exactly ecstatic to hear about it, but the job was done.

[strniohoeee]

Confidential

Pairing: Matt Sturniolo X Female Reader

Synopsis: Y/N travels to the US for the triplets tour, and what happens when Matt takes a little extra liking to her, and invites her beyond backstage.This is for a request I got asking for an international reader having some fun backstage with Matt😏

Warnings⚠️: This is SMUT. I mean I think there’s smacking like one time. Other than that it’s POUNDTOWNNNNNN

Song for the imagine: Backstage Passes- EST Gee, Jack Harlow

Read part 2 here🫶🏽

⚠️This is an 18+ imagine, so minors do not interact, or do??⚠️

These girls will do anything for some backstage passes

Yeah lights, camera, action

I had flown into the US for the triplets tour because I loved them so much, and simply couldn’t pass on this offer. I was so sad they weren’t touring international, but I was so fortunate to be able to go to the US for them.

I had arrived to the states, and had two days to kill before the tour. This was easy I went shopping, out to eat and just chilled in my hotel room.

The day of the tour I was up and out early, so I could get a good spot on the line. I had seen that many people were waiting hours to get in, and I didn’t want to be that person.

I had pre show small talk meet and greet, pre show photo op, and I had backstage passes. I mean I loved these guys so fucking much I had to interact with them at any cost

I waited a good two hours before we got in for the small talk, and when it was my turn I was so nervous and excited!!

I first met Nick. I ran over to him, and gave him a hug

“Hii, how are you?” He asked giving me a hug

“I’m good! How are you?” I asked him

“I’m good thank you” he said

We took pictures together and chatted before I moved onto Chris, and it was the same with him picture videos and chatting.

It was now my turn to say hi to Matt, and this is who I was the most nervous for because I was team Matt, and he looked so fucking good today

“Hi! So nice to see you” he said giving me a hug

“Hii! It’s so good to see you! How are you?” I asked him

“I’m good! How are you?” He asked me

“I’m good! I’m rooting for team blue” I told him flaunting off my blue outfit

“I see that! We’re gonna win tonight baby” he said, but my head lingered on him saying baby….

“I have backstage passes, so I’ll be there to congratulate you when you win” I said to him

“Oh yeah?” He responded giving me a smirk, am I going crazy, or is Matt being flirty with me????

“You already know!” I told him

That interaction ended, and then we did the photo op, and we waited for the show to start which took a few hours of waiting, so I snacked and drank some water

After the show was over, and Chris had won I was devastated. Matt had this in the bag, but he fumbled horribly. Tril came out to perform, and then by 9:30 they were calling everyone for backstage to get on line. I waited on this line while they did the after show photo op.

I was the third and final group. I was so nervous and excited, and I just couldn’t wait to see Matt again so we can talk about him losing

I had met Chris and then Nick. We chatted and took pictures together, and even filmed a few tik toks. Finally I was the last person to talk to Matt

“So good to see you again” he said before giving me a hug

“So great to see you. You had that in the bag I thought you would’ve won” I said to him as he signed my stuff

“Man, I know! I was so so close” he said shaking his head

“Maybe next time? I could be your partner next time, and we’ll win” I told him

“Oh with you on my team. Id be winning in every aspect” HES FUCKING FLIRTING HE IS

“Is that so?” I asked with a flirty ring to my tone

“Very much so. You in another body con dress…on my side. Yeah I’d be winning” he said winking

The wink? The fucking wink?? I know I’m not going crazy.

At this point the security was telling everyone that there was two more minutes before it was over.

Matt went over to speak to the security guards, and they nodded while looking at me.

“Hey so stay at the back of the line, I want to chat with you a little longer” Matt told me

“Oh okay sure!” I said super excited. Its not everyday that a fan gets to stay extra long backstage with their celebrity crush

Everyone had left, and they shut the door before I walked out.

“Hey follow me” Matt said as he started to walk to another door that led to another long corridor

I followed him till we got to an extra room. I assume it was for any of their guests that came to this venue

Matt had locked the door. Something I took note of

“Take a seat” he said gesturing to the couch in the corner

I sat down, and he sat next to me. Not too far, but not too close either

“So…” I said trying to break the silence

“What would you do for backstage passes” he suddenly blurted out

“Ummm pay for them?” I said laughing

“No. I mean like if you couldn’t buy them, and all you could do was bribe your way in…what would you do” he asked me now completely turned towards me

“I’d do just about anything” I told him

“Would you suck a dick” he said

“Matt….where’s this going?” I asked getting a little uncomfortable

“Would you suck a dick for backstage passes” he asked again

“I mean it depends” I told him

“Depends on?” He said prying

“Depends on who they are, and if I find them hot” I told him

“So would you suck my dick, would you fuck me for more backstage passes?” He asked licking his lips

“Matt that’s….I don’t know” I told him looking down

“Well look at me. I’m powerful, I’m hot it’s not everyday I’m asking a girl this question” he said standing up

“I…” I simply could not form an answer

“What if I said you had to suck my dick.” He responded now standing in front of me

“Why would I have to suck your dick?” I asked looking up at him

“Because I’m in charge, and I said so” he told me

“And if I Don't want to” I said back

“Then there’s the door” he said moving and waiting for me to get up, but my feet weren’t moving

“Exactly my point. You want to” he said now standing in front of me again

“I never said that” I told him back

“So then leave” he said pointing to the door

“No” I told him, honestly my mouth was moving fast than brain

“So then stop talking, and use that mouth of yours to suck my cock” he said. My mouth dropped. I was genuinely shocked by his vulgarness. This was not Matt

Within a few seconds my hands were on his waistband and I was tugging his pants down allowing his dick to spring upwards

Am I really about to suck thee Matt Sturniolos dick?? God what has my life come to, and I never want this to end

“You in that tight dress hugging your every curve has made me so fucking horny” he said petting my face

“Now suck” he said lightly smacking my face

My mouth opened and immediately I took his dick into my mouth. Allowing him to slide all the way to the back of my throat before I gagged

“Fuck” he said inhaling sharply

I pulled back, licking the tip and sucking harshly before going back down. Jerking whatever wasn’t in my mouth with my right hand

I had to take a second to get my breathing back, so I slowly started to stroke his dick.

“You look so hot with your mascara running down your face, and your lips all swollen” he said looking down at me

“You look so hot like that with your dick in my hand” I said looking up at him through my lashes

“Do you wanna fuck?” He asked

“Yes” I said looking up at him and licking my lips

“Good cause so do I” he said lifting me up and placing me on the table that was in the room

He started kissing my neck and down to my collar bone

“I don’t kiss, I hope you understand” he said looking at me

“Tuh. But you fuck and get your dick sucked?” I asked rolling my eyes

“Yeah cause I’m in charge. I say what goes” he said looking at me sternly

“Yeah whatever you say” I said back to him smugly

He slid my dress up and moved my underwear to the side

“So fucking wet” he said slowly rubbing my clit

“Fuck Matt” I said sighing and throwing my head back a little bit

He started to jerk his own dick before slowly inserting himself into me.

“Fuckkkk” I said now completely throwing my head back

“Ready?” He asked me grabbing onto my hips

“Yes please” I said propping myself on my elbows

Without a second thought he immediately started to point into me ruthlessly. Hitting my g spot in all the right ways

“Fuck you take me so well, doll” he moaned out

“Fuck matt keep going….HARDER” I yelled out to him

Matt gripped my hips harder and started to slam into me at an ungodly pace. Anybody walking by would hear skin and moans, and this table creaking under us

“Fuck just like that” I said with my brows furrowed

Matt was relentlessly thrusting into me. Moaning and groaning every single second

“Oh goddddd” I moaned out letting my jaw fall slack

“Fuck keep clenching on me, and I’m going to cum” he said pounding into me which caused me to clench down on him again

Matt picked up his shirt and put into his mouth biting on it before grabbing my thighs and pushing them back a little bit, so he could screw me at a new deeper angle

This caused me to fall back and grip the edge of the table for support

“Fuck fuck fuck oh my goddddd” I moaned out completely loosing my mind

He let one leg fall down and used that hand to start rubbing at my clit

“Shitttttt” I said picking my head up to look at him

“I’m gonna cum I’m gonna cum” I said clenching down on him. This made him rub my clit harder and faster

“FUCKKKKKK” I screamed out before I came all over his cock. Shaking and trembling and speaking gibberish. This was the best orgasm I’ve ever had

He let me calm down before pulling out and jerking himself off. It took about thirty seconds before his mount went slack, allowing the shirt to fall from between his teeth

“Fuckkkk” he said as he came on my lower abdomen. Shaking and convulsing

Once we both came down from our high he picked his pants back up, and walked over to grab some napkins before wiping me clean

“How sweet…cleaning me up” I said to him as he finished wiping me off

“I usually try to keep my cum sluts nice and pampered” he said before walking to the trash to throw out the napkin

“God you have a way with words” I said hopping off the table and sliding my dress down again

“What can I say?” He said smugly

He helped me gather my things before deciding which one of us would leave the room first.

I decided to leave first.

“Bye Matt. I guess I’ll see you at the next tour” I told him giving him a kiss on the cheek

“Yeah. I hope to see you on the next tour. So we can do this again and again” he said kissing me on the cheek

“Still no kiss?” I said half joking

“I told you I don’t kiss, but maybe next time” he said giving me a flirty smile

“See you then!” I said and turned to the door. He smacked my ass before opening the door for me

“I’ll see you around” he said nodding his head

The End

Hiiiiii I hope you guys enjoyed this one💋. For the person that requested this I pray to the lord above I didn’t disappoint ❤️❤️ I got so many more stories coming for yall 😁😁

-J💅🏽

[starr-fall-knight-rise]

HASO, “Living the Dream.”

I didn’t get a lot of time to write today, but I hope you all still like it :)

“No! Absolutely not!”

“This isn’t your decision to make.”

“President, this is completely insane. You have to see that.”

The two officers turned to look at the president of the UN who sat in his seat idly fiddling with a paperclip. It spun, once and then twice between the fingers of his right hand before he bothered to look up. 

The UN president was a sturdy man in his late sixties with greying hair, dark eyes and a slight paunch.  He wasn’t a man of unusual intelligence or anything like that. In fact his greatest ability and charismatic character in front of a crowd, but behind the scenes, the man was racked with indecision and uncertainty.

Admiral Kelly stepped forward and looked around the table at the other ranking officers falling lastly on the UN president who she stuck with a steady gaze, one she had been told when she was captain, had the ability to freeze even the bravest man’s blood in his veins.

“The GA has made their decision and I tend to agree with them.”

“It’s madness.” Another officer said leaning forward in his seat.

“That boy doesn’t have nearly enough experience. He was on your ship for less than a year, has only flown ten combat missions in his entire career, AND only a SINGLE ground Op.”

Another Admiral stood in agreement to back them up, “The boy is barely old enough to grow a beard much less command a ship. He has no experience.”

Admiral kelly kept her eyes narrowed. 

She knew the kind of effect she had on people. Even though she was no more than five foot five, her parents had always said her personality added another three feet.

“With all due respect, Admirals, how many of you have more than a year of experience dealing with aliens?”

The men’s jaws worked but they said nothing.

“How many of you have even fought in an alien war?”

More silence.

“How many of you have been on an alien ship?”

No one responded.

She stood from her seat, hands resting behind her back, “If you are expecting to find someone with more experience, you are kidding yourselves. And don’t come at me with some bullshit about how other officers have more combat experience. You may be right but that was against HUMANS, human conflicts and human wars. We need someone who doesn’t have their head so stuck in the past. If we send a vet in, MAYBE they will be able to deal with an alien conflict, and maybe they’d fowl it up by thinking humans are the same as aliens.” She looked around the table, “If we look at this, really look at this, he has the most experience out of ANYONE in the UNSC. He was the first one to discover aliens, he offered himself as a subject to be tested by aliens, he helped to establish communication between our species. He fought in an alien war and lived, and afterwards he came back for more.”

She turned to look around the room, her hands held wide, “The GA love him, the Chairwoman knows him by name, and they asked for him personally. Most of this isn’t even about alien conflict. We don’t have to worry about his prowess on the battlefield if there are never any battles. He doesn’t want to fight them, which means he will do everything possible to avoid war, and, most importantly, he is still loyal to the UNSC.”

She looked around at them with a very serious expression,

“I don’t need to tell you about what It took to survive operation steel eye. I know you've all read the reports. By rights that boy should be suing the UNSC for all it’s worth, but for some reason he is loyal enough to come limping back to lay at the feet of the UNSC. If I were him I would have gotten out at the first opportunity, but he’s proven a loyalty to the UNSC that we can’t just pass up. He has experience, he has guts, and he has loyalty to spare, and, lord forgive me for saying this, but if he does fail, no one will be surprised. But if he succeeds, he will be a success story the UNSC can front for the rest of this millenia.”

Looking around the table she could see that her words were making some impact on the waiting generals. She felt bad about some of the things she was saying. She hated making it out to seem like the boy was just a pawn to be used and discarded if it didn’t turn out, but that was the sort of thing these men understood. She could raise other points, the real points, but they wouldn’t be likely to listen.

She could blab at them all day about her experience with the young man. How she knew him to be ready to work, honest to a fault, funny, charismatic in an awkward sort of way, and probably the most trustworthy young man on the face of the damn planet. If there was anyone she would trust to hold the entire world in the palm of their hand, she would let him do it. Granted she would supervise him to make sure he didn’t accidentally drop it, but she KNEW that given time and some maturing the boy would make an excellent leader.

She could feel it in her bones.

Right into her marrow.

Andshe would always be there to watch him and provide her expertise if he ever needed it. 

She wasn’t worried.

Instead of saying any of this she took a deep breath, “We are going into a new age, and we need to have flexible minds. Old war dogs like us aren’t going to cut it, too setin our ways.” She turned to look around the room, “And if he fails, I will take full responsibility for his actions.”

She knew what she was doing was rash, setting her entire career on one man, and no more than a boy at that, but she had faith, and more than that, she knew who had trained him, and had to admit that he had a pretty damn good mentor.

***

Adam Vir had fallen asleep.

No one could really blame him, his flight back from Andromeda had come in late, and he hadn’t slept in over 24 hours, but still, slouched against the wall in a cheap plastic chair with his mouth open and a line of drool running down his face was hardly becoming. Despite this, no one gave him a second lance as they hurried up and down the hallway at fort harmony listening to the distant sounds of jet engines starting up on the runway crisp and cool in the early morning chill.

“Lieutenant.” Adam Vir jerked in his seat as a boot gently kicked his shoe, nearly toppling over.

“YES!”

He looked up to find Admiral Kelly standing over him, and made an undignified scrambled to his feet wiping drool from his cheek feeling red rise up from under his collar as he made a wobbly and very undignified salute.

She only smiled, “At ease, Lieutenant, and come with me.”

He let his hand dropped and he quickly followed her up the hall watching as eyes turned to look at them in mild curiosity as they passed.

Admirals didn’t often speak to lowly first lieutenants, “Where are we going, ma’am.”

She turned a corner and he nearly ran himself into the wall, dodging to the side only at the last minute and staggering a bit as he tried to keep pace with her. He was blushing madly now feeling like a clumsy idiot next to her graceful strides. 

What he wouldn’t give to be just a little bit more like her, so calm and cool and poised and…

She motioned him into the next door, and he stepped inside,holding it open for her as he did.

It was her office, which he guessed by the name plate on her desk and several shadow boxes on the wall behind her desk, each one of hem holding some medal or award or other she had received for distinguished service.

The glass on those boxes was old and mostly coated in dust not having been disturbed in a long time, as in comparison to the framed picture on her desk, which was lovingly dusted clean every morning. It looked like a picture of her family, brothers, sisters, mother and father. Her father being a very tall, very broad looking islander, while her mother was a very petite asian woman.

She clearly hadn’t interhited her father’s height, and looked more like her mother.

She Turned to sit behind the desk, hands clasped before her as the stars glittered lightly on the shoulders of her uniform.

Kelly nodded for him to sit and he did as requested.

She nodded to the yellow envelope on the desk before her, “Open it.”

He paused, and did as told, opening the envelope and tipping it’s contents out onto the desk.

His eyes were caught at first by a large folded blueprint, which he opened and spread out on half the desk before him.

It didn’t take him long to figure out what it was.

He glanced up at her, “Is this the new ship?”

She nodded.

“Next generation?” he was practically drooling, “What I wouldn’t give to fly one of these.” He looked up at her, “Are you going to be flying her, she’s beautiful.” Granted all he could see were the white lines of the blueprint but he could just imagine.”

She smiled slightly.

“Why don’t you take a look at the rest of it.”

He forced his eyes away from the blueprint and down to the rest of the packet.

On the table before him two glittering silver bars winked up at him.

He reached out with a hand and picked up the captain’ bars frowning. He then turned his attention to a pile of white papers and quickly scanned his eyes over the pages. Aam Vir may have behaved like a big idiot but he had been top of his class at the academy, and unlike the big oaf he looked like, he had pretty good reading comprehension.

Didn’t take him more than a few seconds to scan the page and…. freeze .

He blinked, re-read the lines five or six times.

Re read it again.

Looked up at kelly then back at the paper then back up at kelly.

“I…. what is this?”

She tried to contain the small smile that flickered over the front of his face, “What does it look like.”

“It…. well it LOOKS like a written recommendation for a promotion… a promotion to captain and orders to loan out for the GA…. on the next constructed interstellar ship.. .but….”

He looked up knowing what he hoped but not daring to believe.

It was when her small knowing smile was split by a grin that he knew.

His ears went suddenly muffled, his heart sped up to light speed and he thought he could hear her speaking but he couldn't hear her.

“No way!” he said 

“No way, no way no way. No friggin WAY.”

She stood, and he stood, and he found he didn’t know what to do with his hands he found himself walking in a small circle. He held the paper out to hre, “IS this serious, are you serious?”

“Serious as a heart attack.”

“No way.”

“Yes way.” “You’re serious.”

“I just said so.”

He looked down at the page and then back up again one last time, and he was suddenly so overwhelmed that he just couldn’t handle it anymore and he threw his arms around her. It was probably the most unprofessional show of emotion the UNSC had ever seen. No salute, no handshake none of that professional stuff.

Instead, he, a junior officer, was hugging the fleet commander, who he now realized was like  almost nine inches shorter than he was, and…. Was he crying?

Yep, crying like a big ugly baby, ok maybe not so bad.

He was laughing and crying and completely overwhelmed to the point of probably losing his promotion.

Luckily for him Admiral Kelly laughed with him.

Man she was was fucking amazing.

Until he eventually pulled away grinning like an idiot and not bothering to wipe his eyes..

“Take a couple deep breaths for me, Captain.”

Captain!

He loved the sound of that.

Captain Vir

Captain Adam Vir of the UNSC.

He took a few deep breaths, calmed himself down enough so he could speak, straightened up, “Thank you ma’am, I won’t let you down.”

“I know you won’t. Now get out of here, and pull yourself together before the promotion ceremony.”

He grinned again, “Yes Ma’am.” In his enthusiasm turning away, he nearly tripped over his pushed out chair, but managed to right himself before hand, giving a rueful smile and running from the room.

He managed to make it outside before bursting with excitement jumping up into the air and pumping his fist, before dancing around in a circle shouting and chanting.

A couple columns of marching soldiers looked very confused as they walked past him like he was some kind of lunatic, but it didn’t matter to him.

He had made it!

He had made it 

His dream had come true and he had made it. 

[rpg-elf-girl]

Shadows House

I have a lot of thoughts surrounding this particular show, both good & bad.

Allow me to give a quick summary for anyone who hasn't seen/read it!

Shadows House is about 'a faceless family of nobles who all live within this giant manor, the Shadows House.

When a Shadow comes of age they receive a 'Living Doll' to both serve as their face and to clean the soot they emit from their bodies.

The most important rule of the living dolls is "don't fret over trivial matters"

A task which is difficult for the ever curious doll Emiliko.

Watch this tale unfold as Emiliko & her mistress Kate navigate this ever mysterious Manor together.'

For a fan of slow burn thrillers, horror, slice of life, supernatural & mystery series' this has been an absolute blast!

It's not quite the combination of genres you'd expect from a show, but it works really well here!

In fact I was so into the anime that this is actually the first show where I broke down and read the manga!

Unfortunately there's no official English release, but at least there are some people translating the series!

As much as I'd like to go on about the manga, this post is meant to be more so about the anime so I'll (try to) leave it at that.

Though i feel obligated to warn anime onlys I'll likely refer the manga a lot in a spoiler section latter in this post I'll try to be vague but I can't guarantee anything. For anyone worried about that I'll lable it do you can read on until then.

Everything from the animation to the music was amazing & completely fit the mood of the story! I remember a couple scenes where I actually teared up because of this!

The Ending theme is an absolute banger! I've listened to that on repeat ever since I first heard it! And the Opening is also great! It's cool for it to be an instrumental, stuff like that is pretty rare! I also heard the song in the op as a motif in the music throughout the show! It really sets the right mood in each scene it's in! It's amazing for getting into each episode!

In terms of adaptation almost everything from the beginning to the end of the Debut arc was done amazingly well!

Even with the stuff they cut it still holds true to the spirit of its source.

The main important part that was cut is something that could easily be introduced latter if they decide to go for a second season, so I'm not too mad about that.

However! Everything after the debut is a bit of a different story.

There was a lot I liked about the last couple episodes but there were some parts that were immersion breaking for me.

I've been being vague up until this point l, but I'm planning on going into spoiler territory for both the anime and manga after this. So I'll make a quick spoiler free summary of my thoughts before moving onto that.

I really really loved this show but in my opinion the last 3 episodes were the weakest of them all. They went anime only for the ending. I don't mind that on it's own, but it was rushed and the writing was sloppy at times.

Now I'm not telling you to not watch the show! Most of It's really really good, and I can still see people enjoying the parts I'm talking about if they want to give the anime a try. Overall I've fallen in love with this series and I could never recommend it enough.

If what I'm saying is giving you bad vibes the manga is available and doesn't have the issues I've mentioned. You can look for a translation online, it didn't take me long to find one so don't worry too much about that.

Also! if you're an anime only who's finished the series and want to know where to pick up the Manga I'd recommend at least skiming through the beginning. I know it might not be what you're looking for but there were a bunch of small scenes that either got cut or were merged for adaptation purposes that I think are super cute & give more context to different aspects of the setting. However! Pay close attention during the "night watchers part" something important got cut .

~~~Now for spoilers!!!!~~~

I don't want to make it sound like I'm some manga purist who hates the very thought of the slightest change from the source. I'm anime only for a lot of different shows and I've always despised it when that type of manga reader reared it's ugly head.

While I'll admit some changes did bother me I won't make a fuss about the smaller stuff.

With that said!

I hinted earlier in this post that I didn't have a big problem with Robe-same being cut. That was because without them there it does make for a more complete story if they only get one season to work with.

If there is another season they can easily be introduced latter on. Like maybe Emiliko & Shaun can meet them when the Debutant class reunion is going on before they talk on the roof (or right after that) I actually think that would be the perfect time to introduce them (other than the time they were supposed to appear, but I digress)

Louise teaming up & being friendly with Kate can be explained with some dialogue changes at the first Debutant Class Reunion. Louise can say she was just trying to show off or that she just wanted to get back at Edward and that she isn't interested in helping Kate with her problems. Things can then go on as they did in the manga.

Kates being reckless & telling everything to John can be explained by her being extremely panicked when Emiliko went missing, as long as there are some lines of dialogue adressing this it's fine. Though I do wish she tried to keep some stuff a secret but couldn't because Shaun tries to interfer because he's still brainwashed, or something along those lines. It felt a bit weird after she just told Emiliko to keep that stuff between them. Still that could be explained by how panicked she was.

There are other things, but I don't want to drag the post on too long. Most of the issues can be fixed with little changes here & there.

I never had a problem with the idea of them going in an anime only direction. I just want to have a good time with the show.

Unfortunately I can't 100% vouche for the direction the show went in. There were elements that I can't excuse, even viewing it as it's own entity instead of an adaptation.

My main complaint with it is how they handled the brainwashing of Ricky & Lou. They didn't say a word when the Debutants were talking badly about Edward & even went along with a plan to go against him. It makes absolutely no sense!

Shaun freaked out when John only suggested that he didn't have to be loyal to the house. These guys were flat out rebelling against an adult! It felt like Ricky & Lou didn't have a purpose & were just there to be there.

The whole point of the coffee is to influence shadows against doing stuff like this. It makes the coffee seem pointless and the adults seem dumb for relying on it to control the kids.

I haven't even brought up the fact that both of their brainwashings were broken by something as simple as a few kind words. It straight up contradicts the rules established by both the Anime and Manga.

This becomes very apparent when you consider all the trouble John & Kate went through to free Shaun & Emiliko.

This was my biggest complaint, but I have some other issues as well.

The next big one is how they handled Edward.

1. Why on earth would he even consider kidnapping Emiliko when he had complete control of the childrens wing? Before this point he was depicted as being a lot more crafty than this. He could easily have Kate monitored or something.

2. Why didn't he use his powers to stop them like what he did to Maryrose & Rosemary when they fought back being taken to the adults wing? He's already shown off his power at this point, why not?

3. Why did he reveal his soot powers at all!? Especially while using his face in front of the kids! The whole unification thing is one of the biggest secrets of the house for good reason! There's no way he wouldn't get in huge trouble for exposing it to children!

Here are some other related questions.

Why didn't Kate, Emiliko, & John react to Edward using soot powers? They shouldn't know about unification yet so why didn't they act shocked, or say anything about it?

Is Edward being banished even an option in the Shadows House? Wouldn't the third floor lords just dispose of him rather than risk letting him leave?

How did John even get a veiled dolls outfit? Louise had to use her powers to get Kate one & she left a long time ago.

I can't think of much else at the moment, but I think you get my point.

Please don't take this as me saying that I hate the show because of these episodes. Even if I consider them the weakest of the series I still found a lot of parts to be very enjoyable!

Like I thought it was adorable When Edward was attempting to interrogate Emiliko & she kept being her sunshine self pretending to eat & falling asleep.

Barbara getting to tell off Edward for breaking the rules was great!

I loved seeing Shaun hatch the plan to get Kate into the adults wing to save Emiliko.

Seeing John (attempt to) sneak around the adults wing had me rolling!

The ending scene of Shaun, Ricky, & Lou singing gave me the chills.

(Though I wonder how they'd handle Shaun & Emiliko being brainwashed again since they already used the scenes where they're freed)

Kate & Emilico being propelled by John back to the children's wing was absolutely amazing! I found Shaun & Ricky running over to catch them to be super sweet! (Not to mention the way that scene was animated was absolutely gorgeous!)

Getting hints to what was supposed to come after the debut was nice, at least the groundwork is there in case this gets a season 2!

To (try to) wrap this all up while there were a lot of things I loved and disliked about this show I still had a really fun time watching it!

I kinda hope there's a season two just to see if they can tidy up the mess that the last few episodes created.

Regardless of whether that happens or not I came out of this with a series I absolutely adore.

Heck I could make a whole other post about the manga. (Hopefully one that's less ranty)

Anyway! I won't take any more of your time.

I hope you all have a wonderful day/night! And I hope to see you in my next post!

(Sorry if this one was a bit of a mess!)

[darksaiyangoku]

Current RWBY Volumes ranked

My rankings for the RWBY Volumes. Here we go:

Volume 6- This, to me, was RWBY at its peak. This was such a great volume. It expanded the story and world so much more and gave us more insight into Salem and Ozpin. The Apathy are some of the scariest things too. Not as much as the Nazguls but they come a close third.

Volume 3- The beginning of darker times. The tournament was so fun and then with the snap of a finger, everything comes crashing down!! Everyone was nearly pushed to their limits here and seeing Pyrrha's death and Ruby's Silver Eyes in action still give me chills. Awesome volume and it introduced us to our fan favourites such as Qrow, Winter and even Adam.

Volume 8- The story gets much darker than before and we get to see just how ruthless Salem and her forces truly are! The Hound was one of my favourite enemies and I have a feeling we haven't seen the last of them yet. However, it seems like nearly everyone also had OOC moments and they just didn't feel like themselves. There's a fine line between character development and OOC and I think CRWBY took it too far in the other direction.

Volume 2- This was just a lot of fun and while it would've been nice to explore different character dynamics and some more training from the cast for the Vytal Festival, this was still a good volume nonetheless. Roman Torchwick was truly one of RWBY's best villains.

Volume 1- A lot of the problems with this one are more technical than anything, as they were just starting out. In terms of story, it feels more like a prologue rather than a complete volume in its own right. However, it has still has a charming quality to it and its always nice to see where it all started.

Volume 4- Now while I do like Volume 4, this one does have a lot of problems. Especially with the lack of a proper timeline, it makes everything seem like its happening simultaneously even though characters' dialogue and actions seem to imply they're weeks or even months apart from each other.

Volume 7- Filler, filler, filler. It was nice to see Penny back and the Ace-Ops were cool but the story and pacing was both somehow painfully slow and incredibly fast.

Volume 5- This is where a lot of RWBY's shortcomings were magnified and it had a lot the same problems as Volume 7, with a lot of filler and the final action scene being an absolute mess. Maiden Raven was awesome, though.

That's all I have so far. This might change as soon as the other volumes release, so look out for the updated version soon. 'Till then, I wish you all well.

[cpd5021]

Runaway

This one is getting posted early because I’ll be insanely busy tomorrow. Enjoy!!

Happy Wednesday!!! One week closer!! They’re finally back to filming and I am soooo excited! Thanks to  @joy-meathiel  for this prompt!!

“Alright, listen up everyone. We’ve got a problem.”

Not the best words to hear first thing in the morning, especially from Voight who really didn’t see much of anything as a threat. It was my second week back from New York, but my first official day back in the unit. The first week had been spent filling out countless amounts of paperwork and doing debriefings to get caught up on everything I had missed while I was away. To say I felt nervous was an understatement. Not only was this my first day back under Voight’s noticeably watchful eye, but it was also the first day back with Jay. Not that we hadn’t been hanging out for the last week, enjoying the Bartoli’s I was promised and catching up over beers at Molly’s or my place. But something about spending the whole day with him had my stomach swirling in a way I couldn’t understand. I pushed the thoughts aside and turned my attention back to Voight, who, to my surprise, was staring right at me with a concerned look on his face. I sent him a questioning look, my eyes darting quickly to meet Jay’s who looked just as puzzled by Voight’s intense stare, before turning back to Voight. 

“Sarge?” 

I pushed when it didn’t seem like he was going to elaborate. He crossed his arms over his chest and let out a sigh, his eyes never leaving mine.

“We’ve got to get you out of town for a bit. Word is there’s a target on your back.”

His words set a panic rising in my chest, along with an extreme confusion as to how I could be anyone’s target after being gone for so long. 

“Who? How?” 

I asked, standing and moving to lean against the front of my desk. He chose to ignore my question and instead turned to address the rest of the bullpen. 

“Upton is going to be out of commission for a while until we get a handle on this thing. I’m going to assign one of you to get her out of here and somewhere safe. You’re to stay put until you hear from me and only me, is that clear?”

The room nodded in agreement, their faces a mix of concern and confusion. I looked to Jay again and my stomach did another lurch when I saw him raise his hand. 

“I’ll get her out of here, I know somewhere that’s perfect to lay low in.”

Voight nodded in Jay’s direction and then pivoted to walk back into his office, I was hot on his heels, grabbing the door before he could close it. He sat in his chair and motioned for me to sit down. 

“You’re going to go wherever Halstead takes you and you’re not to contact anyone until you hear from me. Got it?”

I nodded in agreement but still pushed for more information. 

“What is this about Sarge?”

He leaned back in his chair, letting out a sigh as he rubbed at his face. 

“The thing about those lines you crossed Hailey...they were big players. Gael has people in every corner of this city and he’s not stupid. At first he was targeting Roja’s but he’s smart enough to figure out she was too new for those kinds of connections.”

My heart ached at the mention of Vanessa. My first night back, after Jay had picked me up from the airport, we headed back to my place. I had been able to tell from his demeanor as we approached my house that something was up, but nothing prepared me for the blow that came when we walked into my place and found it void of any trace of my roommate's presence. Jay had explained all about how Voight had sent Vanessa back to narcotics and she was in a major undercover op. How I would likely not hear from her for a while because she had gone dark for the coverup. And how it all had to do with Gael. I had broken down at the realization that my actions had put her at risk and that she had been forced to uproot herself from this life that she fit so well into. Jay had calmed me down enough to give me the letter she left, stating that none of this was my fault and she would be so pissed if she found out I blamed myself. Her written words had brought a smile to my face but it wasn’t enough to ease the guilt that had settled into my chest. I swallowed hard and brought myself back to the present, looking at Voight and feeling lost over the mess I had put everyone in. 

“We’ll figure this out and we’ll get ahead of it. But for now, I want you out of the picture.”

I nodded again, blinking back the tears that were threatening to gather. He motioned for me to leave and I did so, feeling defeated as I went to find Jay. When I found him in the locker room, he was tossing some of his things into a black duffel bag in his locker. I sighed and moved to do the same. 

“Where are we going?”

I asked, assuming he had some remote hotel in mind and cringing at the thought of spending any more time in a hotel bed after the last month and a half in New York. He glanced up at me then, a slight smirk on his face that faded when he saw my own face. 

“I know somewhere good. It won’t be so bad.”

His avoidance of a direct answer had my defenses going up. I straightened my back and turned to face him directly. 

“Jay?”

He smirked again, his face turning the slightest shade of pink under my stare. 

“Ontario…”

My eyes bugged out at his reply. He was insane if he thought I was leaving the country.

“Canada?” 

I managed to choke out, causing him to chuckle at my hoarse voice. 

“No, sorry. Wisconsin. My family has a cabin up there…”

He trailed off when I still didn’t relax. I wasn’t sold on the idea of even leaving the city let alone the state. 

“Jay...hiding out is one thing but I’m not running away. This is all my fault, I should stay to help clean it up.”

I hated the way my voice sounded utterly defeated as I tried to argue with him. I knew I wasn’t going to win this fight anyway between him and Voight, so it was probably best to just go along with the plan. It didn’t hurt to try though. 

“Hailey, the most important thing right now is to keep you safe. Voight will figure this out and you’ll be back before you know it.” 

He took a step towards me, placing his hand gently on my shoulder to reassure me. I sent him a half hearted smile and then finished gathering my things. 

*****

The four hour drive up to the cabin surprisingly wasn’t that bad, we stopped once for gas and some snacks but Jay made pretty good timing to get us here. When he pulled up the long driveway leading up to the quaint little cabin nestled back in the woods, I couldn’t help but let my jaw hang in amazement. The setting looked like something from a Hallmark Christmas movie and I suddenly felt even more nervous about this whole situation. Spending an unknown amount of time with Jay was one thing, but here? This was going to be interesting. He informed me that we could settle in at the cabin and then head back into town later for some groceries and other necessities. I hopped out of the truck and lugged my duffel bag from the back seat, my jaw still slack the more I took in. I followed him up the steps of the covered porch, noting the adorable swing hanging from the rafters and gasped when we entered the cabin. It was floor to ceiling pine and it smelled amazing despite sitting vacant for who knows how long. There was a small couch propped in front of a fireplace with a tiny TV mounted on the wall above. I doubted there was any cable service this far out but the huge collection of movies on the bookshelf in the corner of the room looked promising. A long, solid wood table was in the center of the cabin, a top one of those old fashioned braided rugs and the kitchen looked just the right size for preparing some cozy food. I noted a door down a short hallway that I presumed was the bathroom and a set of stairs that led up to a loft above us. Under any other circumstance, this would be the perfect vacation spot. But the current situation was still leaving a bad taste in my mouth. Jay moved beside me, taking my bag and trekking up the stairs to the loft. I followed after him, curious to see more. At the top of the landing I noted a huge king size bed with what looked like a handmade quilt on top. Way better than the hotel beds I had been picturing. I was so busy admiring the comfyness of the bed that I didn’t notice Jay had come to stand in front of me. 

“So, there’s only the one bed. But I’ll take the couch.”

He rubbed at his neck, looking suddenly uncomfortable. 

“Jay, it’s your cabin. I’ll take the couch.”

He smiled sheepishly at me, glancing back at the bed before turning back to face me, a blush covering his cheeks. 

“We’ll figure something out.”

We headed back down the stairs and Jay gave me a brief tour of the tiny cabin. There wasn’t much more to see than what I had already noted but I enjoyed listening to the way he pointed out all the little details as we went. This place held memories for him, that much was obvious. 

After the tour inside, we walked around the property for a bit. He told me how him and Will used to come up here all the time and how their dad was a big hunter. His eyes lit up when he talked about all the delicious cooking his mother would do in the tiny kitchen and the sight made me melt a little on the inside. After a while, we decided to head back into town before the sun went down. Even the quaint little grocery store was enough to warm my heart and I kept picturing myself in a Hallmark movie. I picked up a sweatshirt from the little tourist section of the store, earning a grin from Jay. I had a limited wardrobe from what I had grabbed from my locker so the added warmth of the sweatshirt looked inviting. 

Back at the cabin, I relaxed into the couch that was incredibly comfortable after Jay had shewed me out of the kitchen, telling me he was going to cook for us tonight. I blushed slightly at the way my mind travelled at the thought, but managed to hide it before he noticed. I pulled my new sweatshirt closer, feeling a sudden chill as the evening air cooled down outside. Jay noticed and suggested I go take a hot shower while he finished dinner. I couldn’t object to the thought of some hot water so I grabbed my bag from upstairs and headed into the bathroom. For such a tiny cabin, I was surprised at the size of the shower in this bathroom. It had been redone to look like one of those spa showers and it was definitely big enough for two people. I shook those thoughts from my head and stepped into the hot water, letting my body melt in the steam. Once I was done in the shower, I tugged my new sweatshirt back on along with a pair of black leggings I had thankfully stashed in my overnight back. As I opened the door, letting the steam from my shower swirl in the short hallway, my nose was instantly filled with the most amazing smells. I followed them out into the kitchen and paused at the sight before me. Jay stood over the stove, stirring something in a large pot while another boiled away beside him. I watched as he bent to pull a pan of garlic bread out of the oven, adding to the wonderful aromas in the cabin. I shuffled into the kitchen, catching his eye and causing him to smile my way. I noticed a light blush spread across his cheeks but he turned back to stir whatever concoction was in the pot. I stepped up beside him, glancing into the pan and noting what appeared to be a homemade marinara sauce. 

“I didn’t know you could cook.”

I teased, sending him a smirk when he scoffed my way.

“There’s lots of secret talents I have that you don’t know about.”

His innuendo caused me to blush and it was my turn to dip my head down. 

“And you said I was aloof…”

I countered, trying to ease the sudden tension in the room. He chuckled at my response before motioning for me to go sit at the table while he plated our food. We enjoyed the meal, paired with a glass of wine he must have had stashed at the cabin as it wasn’t something we picked up in town. After dinner, I battled him over the dishes and he eventually conceded, letting me wash them up. Although he remained right by my side, drying them as I went. Once that task was done, I returned to the couch and drew my knees up by my chest, the chill back in the air now that it was fully dark out. Jay noticed my shiver and moved over to the fire place, expertly working to start a fire that cast a dim glow around the room. Once again I had the feeling that I was in some romantic movie and had to remind myself that this was Jay and we weren’t like that.  

“Add skilled fire builder to my list of skills you’re learning about.”

Jay smirked as he sat on the couch beside me. He sat on the opposite end but the couch was small enough we still sat incredibly close. There was no way either one of us would sleep comfortably on this tiny thing, a fact I would point out later. We fell into an easier banter, sipping on some beers Jay had grabbed from town and for just a moment I had forgotten all about why we were actually here. It didn’t take long though for our banter to bring up a joke Vanessa had once told and my mood instantly changed. Jay picked up on the shift in my mood and reached a hand over to grab my shoulder. 

“Hailey...none of this is your fault.”

He tried to reassure me but we both knew that wasn’t the case. I sent him a half hearted smile at his attempt to make me feel better. 

“Jay...we both know all of this is my fault. I never should have done what I did. I screwed everything up.”

We fell into a silence for a moment as Jay pondered how to proceed. 

“Hailey...what happened, yea you crossed some lines. But I think you’ve beaten yourself up enough for it. What’s done is done and eventually this will all work out. Vanessa is a tough girl, she’ll be alright and you’ll hear from her again. I promise you she isn’t mad. She made me pinky promise to make sure you know that.”

I smiled genuinely at the thought of that exchange between the two of them and Jay seemed relieved to see my mood lighten. 

“And New York wasn’t all bad right? I mean, it sucked not having you here for multiple reasons but you’re back now.”

His words confused me a little and I was asking him what he meant before I could think better of it.

“Multiple reasons?”

It was Jay’s turn to blush again and he brought his beer bottle to his lips, obviously stalling his response. I drilled my eyes into the side of his face, letting him know I wasn’t going to drop it. 

“Well yea...I mean, you’re the best partner...and everyone missed you…”

He stammered out a reply but I could tell there was more he wasn’t saying. Suddenly all the feelings I had pushed down after he got shot were front and center and there was a tiny spark of hope rising inside of me that he might feel the same way too. 

“Did you miss me? Aside from being your partner I mean?”

I picked at the label on my bottle, suddenly losing the confidence I had when I asked the question. 

“Of course.”

His words came out so sure that it caused me to look up and meet his eyes. I saw something within them that I couldn’t quite put my finger on. 

“I missed you too Jay.”

 I admitted softly, my words barely above a whisper. 

“Can I ask you something?”

His question threw me off a little but I nodded my head, waiting for him to continue. 

“What did you want to say to me in the hospital room? Before my phone blew it. I’ve been wanting to ask you ever since but it never seemed like the right time. But now, we have pretty much unlimited time so….what was it?”

My heart pounded the second he reminded me of that day and what I had truly wanted to admit to him. The fact that he brought it up made me think even more that maybe he did feel the same way, even though I had never finished what I was going to tell him. 

“It doesn’t really matter.”

I whispered, trying to cop out of this situation. As much as I did love Jay, I wasn’t sure he felt the same way and I couldn’t risk losing him. 

“It does to me.”

His soft response had me looking up at him again, that unrecognizable look even stronger in his eyes now. I smiled at him shyly, my head still dipped down as I picked at the label even more. Suddenly, his hand was over mine, taking the empty bottle from my fingers and setting it on the table in front of us. 

“I had just realized something after you got shot. But that would have been a horrible time to tell you.”

I mumbled out my words, really wishing he would let this go.

“So tell me now.”

He pushed, causing my heart to beat even faster. The way he was looking at me made me think he knew exactly what I was going to say and I wasn’t sure how I felt about that. When I didn’t respond he started talking again, slower this time as if he wasn’t sure this was a good idea. 

“Well, when you got sent to New York...the first week was rough and I thought it was because I was missing you as my awesome partner. Adam...just not the same. But then I would go home and the first thing I wanted to do was tell you all about my day and listen to everything that happened with yours. And then I hated that we weren’t having the same days and that you were off on this big adventure, probably kicking ass and showing everyone else how awesome you are. I wanted to go grab a beer with you at Molly’s or stay home and watch stupid Office reruns on TV. I wanted to hear you laugh, to know that you were okay at the end of a rough day. I’d wake up in the morning and the first thing I’d think of is if you got your coffee...because we all know how that goes if you don’t. I wanted to pick you up and drive into work together, or at least have to fight you off of my pens when you forgot yours. Hailey I...I guess what I realized, when you were gone...is that I kinda fell in love with you. And maybe I’m totally off here and that’s not what you wanted to say to me and I’m probably ruining everything right now but I just needed you to know because it’s all I think about now. You’re all I think about now…”

He trailed off and I blinked away the tears that had gathered in my eyes. The sight seemed to alarm him and he shifted on the couch as if he was about to get up. My hand grabbed his arm, holding him in place as I shifted myself on the couch to face him better. I bore my eyes into his, hoping that he could see in them that I felt exactly the same way. I didn’t trust my voice to speak but I wanted to show him just how right he was. I placed my hand against his cheek, smiling back at him when his lip twitched up into a nervous smile. I closed the gap between us, bringing my lips to rest just above his so they touched when I finally spoke. 

“I love you too Jay.”

And with that I pressed my lips against his. He instantly returned the pressure, placing his own hands against my cheeks as the kiss deepened. Sparks ignited between us and I could feel my breathing coming in gasps as our tongues danced against each other. When we finally broke apart, our foreheads rested against each other and our eyes shared the same look of passion between them. Our lips crashed again and this time Jay was pulling me into his lap, his strong hands gripping my thighs as my arms wrapped around his neck. Without any effort whatsoever, he lifted me up and I could tell he was headed for the stairs. My life might be a huge mess, caused by my own doing, but for the next few hours...I was in one of those stupid romantic Hallmark movies.