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#or rather. is it about being lazy
emzawheezy · 9 months
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drunk food. Home fries, ground beef, onions, green pepper, cheddar cheese and barbecue sauce. quick “pickled” red onions on top and lime juice :)
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inkskinned · 1 year
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they want to talk about mental illness and acceptance and how everyone is a little ocd it's cute and quirky and their "intrusive thoughts" are about cutting their hair off and you say yours are about taking a razorblade to your eye and they say ew can you not and everyone is a little adhd sometimes! except if you're late it's a personality flaw and it's because you are careless and cruel (and someone else with adhd mentions they can be on time, so why can't you?) and it's not an eating disorder if it's girl dinner! it's not mania if it's girl math! what do you mean you blew all of your savings on nonrefundable plane tickets for a plane you didn't even end up taking. what do you mean that you are afraid of eating. get over it. they roll their little lips up into a sneer. can you not, like, trauma dump?
they love it on them they like to wear pieces of your suffering like jewels so that it hangs off their tongue in rapiers. they are allowed to arm-chair diagnose and cherrypick their poisons but you can't ever miss too many showers because that's, like, "fuckken gross?" so anyone mean is a narcissist. so anyone with visual tics is clearly faking it and is so cringe. but they get to scream and hit customer service employees because well, i got overwhelmed.
you keep seeing these posts about how people pleasers are "inherently manipulative" and how it's totally unfair behavior. but you are a people pleaser, you have an ingrained fawn response. in the comments, you have typed and deleted the words just because it is technically true does not make it an empathetic or kind reading of the reaction about one million times. it is technically accurate, after all. you think of catholic guilt, how sometimes you feel bad when doing a good deed because the sense of pride you get from acting kind - that pride is a sin. the word "manipulation" is not without bias or stigma attached to it. many people with the fawn response are direct victims of someone who was malignantly manipulative. calling the victims manipulative too is an unfair and unkind reading of the situation. it would be better and more empathetic to say it is safety-seeking or connection-seeking behavior. yes, it can be toxic. no, in general it is not intended to be toxic. there is no reason to make mentally ill people feel worse for what we undergo.
you type why is everyone so quick to turn on someone showing clear signs of trauma but you already know the fucking answer, so what's the point of bothering. you kind of hate those this is what anxiety looks like! infographics because at this point you're so good at white-knuckling through a severe panic attack that people just think you're stoic. even people who know the situation sometimes comment you just don't seem depressed. and you're not a 9 year old white kid so there's no way you're on the spectrum, you're not obsessed with trains and you were never a good mathematician. okay then.
mental illness is trending. in 2012 tumblr said don't romanticize our symptoms but to be fair tiktok didn't exist yet. there's these series of videos where someone pretends to be "the most boring person on earth" and is just being a normal fucking person, which makes your skin crawl, because that probably means you are boring. your friend reads aloud a profile from tinder - no depressed bitches i fucking hate that mental illness crap. your father says that medication never actually works.
you still haven't told your grandmother that you're in therapy. despite everything (and the fact it's helping): you just don't want her to see you differently.
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shannonsketches · 6 months
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Why is the anime so weird, it's not even the same series dude?? It's like,
Anime:
GOKU: I have a great idea to bring peace to the universe, and my leadership and compassion alone will unite us all. I have No Flaws and am A True Relatable Everyman :)
VEGETA: NO! I AM THE BEST AND I WILL CAUSE PROBLEMS UNTIL I AM RECOGNIZED AS SUCH!!!!
Manga:
GOKU: Vegeta what's cornmeal made of? I know it's what the corn eats, but what's it made of? VEGETA: Hey Kakarot let's play the quiet game until one of us dies.
#dbtag#I do not understand this writing it's so bad aklsdlkasjd#Toei wants Goku to be Clark Kent SO bad and he SO isn't lmao#they're so good and dumb and rounded and complex in the manga what is the anime so afraid of#Toriyama said 'no no this man is a detached faux-immortal who has a dear pure heart but he's childlike and selfish even though he's kind'#and toei went 'got it goku's never done anything wrong ever in his life'#toriyama said 'Vegeta's gone through a lot and he's finally settling into his more mature leadership role with the confidence he's earned'#and toei said 'got it vegeta has the confidence of a high school bully except now he can interact with his family as a comedy bit'#girl hWHAT#Toei trying to group Goku and Vegeta as two people who would rather train than be with their families and Toriyama said NO Vegeta wants#to be HOME this is the first time in years that he's HAD ONE and it makes him HAPPY to be with his wife and children!!#Vegeta trains so that he can protect the things he doesn't want to lose again and Goku trains because it's the thing that makes him happies#They are NOT the same lmao And yeah Vegeta still wants to beat Goku but he also knows that Gohan could dogwalk both of them if he wanted#He also knows Trunks and Goten are going to surpass them it's not about being the best anymore he's past that he just wants to Not Need Gok#He just doesn't want to have to rely on Goku to save the day he wants to be Enough on his own he just wants to know he can be#because every time it's mattered he WASN'T and people he loved were lost to his inability to protect them and he carries that#Like Whis diagnosed him with anxiety and cptsd out in the open and Beerus said he was self-centered for feeling guilt#+ he lowkey enjoys the rivalry it keeps him goal-oriented so he can't get complacent and lazy which is what triggered his Buu Saga breakdow#realized how Fucked Up it was that having a home and loving family made him feel like he was failing and went 'wait no I won actually??'#now he's chill as fuck in the manga. cool confident leader.#and sometimes he is childish and dumb with Goku as a treat#you know what rocks about his rivalry with Goku in Super though is that it's Playful. Vegeta is learning how to Play.#You ever seen a shelter dog get introduced to a really playful dog and it takes a minute for the shelter dog to understand it's safe here#And then they're both running around the backyard playing hot potato with one braincell?? That's Goku and Vegeta's relationship#and the way the anime sleeps on that dynamic is so fucking criminal especially when it's literally canon it's in print it's out there#you had the playbook how'd you fumble it this bad#anyway that's my 25+ year blorbo thoughts I love Geets a lot okay#And I love Goku in the manga a lot I'd forgotten that he's actually a great character when Toei's not fucking up his whole vibe
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anglerflsh · 5 months
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wow ive been kind of off lately I should take a day to rest an[explosion]
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bleakbluejay · 11 months
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Please don't fucking do this shit, it's weird and feels kinda racist.
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I have been re-watching She Ra and the princesses of power and noticed something
In the first scene, where Adora and the other horde cadets are training, they're fighting these illusions of princesses
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But what's really attacking them are these horde robots,
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Almost feels like they're hinting at something there...
Adora has these glasses on, which generate the illusion
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But catra never has the glassses. She was never under any illusion
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Kinda foreshadowing a bit there aren't they
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porcubus · 6 months
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Something i'd like to point out
We can assume the final part of p2 of the canto was not only from heathcliff's perspective but dante's as well, considering we know they can look directly into their memories when resonating with them.
we did not get a new cg for carmen's appearance. This is something you could chalk up to time on the artist's part, and wanting to focus purely on "main" story cgs perhaps? But for this im gonna assume it was purposeful
For those who aren't aware or need a refresher, this CG is from ayin's perspective, from ayin's memory of laying with her in the grass in the past, in the first game
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its personal, and there's only one body who could have this image in their mind.
when viewed this way, the lack of even a redraw feels more intentional 😀...?
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opens-up-4-nobody · 18 days
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...
#bleh. i need half the country to pls stop being on fire. id like to go out and run pls. but its so smokey i can barely see the mountain#i live near :-/ also im just tired and frustrated. its incredible how quickly i vasilate between#things r going well. i should stay in my program and work with cyanos forever. to no no no im not cut out for this. i gotta leave. to yay#let me throw myself head first into consuming every second of my life with working. but only on the things that dont require me to think#which is y im not cut out for this and should be bannished to a world of only doing lab work and following instructions#also i have an screening interview monday for an R0DBT group. so i might b going to control freak classes#assuming i cant convince the lady that im not fit for thr class. which obviously i am bc im my therapist listed the ppl who r#usually put into r0dbt and i was like hm im a lot of those things. but also its 2hrs every week and thats a lot of time. and i feel like im#already on the path away from violently structuring my life specifically bc ive done so much damage#ugh. also i have ridiculously high self standards but i only do anything halfway bc i cant fail if i never try 100%.#so im like a fake control freak. or rather i cant even fully commit to being controlling. im lazy and i dont have the drive.#which almost makes it worse bc im stading at this threshold of control where it destroys me but never actually succeeds in being a perfect#thing. which is def a distorted way to think about it but there u go. ugh. im just tired and my arm hurts too much to draw bc#im older and older everyday. and i dont wanna read papers. i dont wanna grade or work on my presentation. i didn't want to spend 3.5 hrs#doing transfers this morning. and my mom's been dead for 6months and 3 days now. and i still dont kno where ill be a year from now#unrelated
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inundatae · 10 months
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anyway being basically ace/probs grey, i indulge by shooting neuv with the grey beam as well.
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eorzeashan · 8 months
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everyday I experience whimsy thinking about how Eight went from the perception of a diabolical mysterious mastermind to (• ̫ •) in the span of a few years. imperial dissolution turns the hardest operatives into the fluffiest companions
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roostertuftart · 2 years
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Also, and in complete fairness I haven’t seen this said yet, but if anyone does think it’s OOC for Kyle and Tolkien in this episode (as I do see on a surface level an argument for it being so since both of them are not particularly known for indulging in kinda “silly” stuff) I think, idk. Consider reevaluating the characters a bit. Assume you’re wrong in your interpretation of them before assuming it’s the creator’s who don’t know what they’re doing! I’m not saying Matt and Trey are flawless about character consistency by any means, but I do think they’d be proven to put a lot of care and effort into characterization especially recently and especially with the kids. There’s a number of reasons this makes sense for both Kyle and Tolkien and may not seem obvious at first, not to mention they are still just cringey kids above being the serious “mature” ones in their groups and it makes sense they’d be silly sometimes or indulge in fun things like TikTok, cringey or not. It’s honestly really nice to see them do so, especially with their personalities not changing otherwise, because it creates so much more of a well grounded basis for them as characters. Real people are never the serious ones all of the time, and honestly that’s never even exactly what Tolkien and Kyle were written to be!
They’ve always had less serious sides, had moments where they placed the less elegant and mature part for fun, and we see that here in such a real way. We see them goofing off and making fun stupid videos and enjoying the attention and making of them, and taking it seriously and Whatnot- But we also still see them being themselves in the same vein outside of when they’re making their videos which is natural and really nice! Nothing has changed ultimately! It’s just a new side to them both and I love seeing them just be… Happy! Relaxed! Chill! And indulging in an interest they found they shared and loving each other’s company. It’s really sweet!
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pyreofsunflowers · 18 hours
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I want to actually kill someone I just had to spend one full fucking hour of my nursing school I am paying so much fucking money for listening to an advertisement for a shitty nursing home 2 hours away from my home. I tried to just quietly study for finals (which is next week mind you, and my last final before my NCLEX.) and a fucking teacher came over and grabbed my phone out of my hands and just set it on my desk lmao. I am a grown fucking adult and I really don't want to listen to an advertisement for a facility that is desperate for people, overworks its existing workers and has shitty benefits. Did I mention the mandatory overtime, no real weekends, and expectations to go on unpaid company trips? I fucking hate advertising. I hate that I'm expected to sit through a shitty ad for a company I have no realistic way to work for. I am so fucking fed up with being fucking advertised to every second of every fucking day. Teach me about AIDS or give me study tips or talk about ANYTHING THAT IS RELEVANT AT ALL. I AM SO FUCKING SICK OF THIS SHIT
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warlordfelwinter · 1 year
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there's more to do, and i still want to live
--
was listening to the bg3 soundtrack and the chorus of I Want To Live gives me such durge feels and got me thinking about how miserable these few seconds were for Rain, standing there thinking of the little dreams he'd dared to have that he might have a happy ending after all this, thinking he should have known better than to hope
also i like to pretend bhaal had held the companions back with some sort of magic bc otherwise i'd hope they wouldn't just fucken stand there like they do in the game jsklfdngsf
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uzukibeans · 3 months
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a lot of media complaints about having a female character’s arc center patriarchy/sexism for being cliche or woke laziness is kinda… silly
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spamtoon · 5 months
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(Out of nowhere, you are approached by a familiar lightbulb-headed Cog.)
Ah, it's you, cat. Thinking you're oh-so-slick. Muttering and whispering under those raggedy whiskers of yours... Thinking I am unable to hear it all...
Well, you've simply underestimated my fantastic hearing. You probably want to know the reason why I'm here, taking a 'break' from my incredibly important scientific breakthroughs? It's quite simple, really!
(She gets close, and squints her eyes.)
I know what you are.
Farewell, now!
(She then leaves the way she came from.)
(Spam giggles immensely, covering her face... it always seems like she's giggling, isn't she? This lasts... at least thirty seconds. Longer than usual.)
And I know what I am too, Sparky! You broke through something, that's for sure. Really, broke through...
(She looks down, continuing to laugh nervously.)
You know, I find it odd you Havent tried to bulb blast me into the stratosphere by now. I mean knowing how you acted with Frostbite. Is there something peculiar about me that you perhaps can't quite track? Something about me that you... don't know what I am?
I know, I know, I'm talking to nobody again. But you were there when I had a moment today with the one the only Frostbite The Bravecog. You may be remaining. Lurking in the shadows. Knowing about these thoughts that I'm thinking.
(The giggling resumes, lasting far shorter this time.)
Your brother's a piece of fucking barp, by the way
(She braces for impact for a few seconds, wincing while smiling, before comically looking around to realize nobody's there. She sighs.)
Wow, okay maybe toony superhero show logic doesn't apply in this situation. Cool.
WAIT I JUST FUCKING REALIZED WHAT SHE MEANT but like. Dude if she meant that then what's the point I mean the whole ahh sellbot department barping knows unless you're Really low on the ladder. Heheh... maybe she did mean what I thought she meant.
Oh i'm so fucking screwed. What kind of bitch gets filament fever
#bright spark#<- for finding this again later. haha i called her sparky#the way she talks fucking tickles my brain so much im so . ohguohguohoghog SHE#SORRY THAT THIS TOOK SO LONG you see i was in the mindset that i would do this one little thing and then i would do my work which uh.#that leads to so so SO much procrastination. including on fun things! oh so fun things.#today was an event.#i also spent quite a bit of time ruminating i “would she really say that” is worse when shes literally you#to clarify. she is spam's aunt by like. building standards. not really in her found family. so its fucked up but as i said in discord this#is like. a “your mom's kinda hot” level crush. you know. also sorry i really wanted to say filament fever its been eating at me okay#nothing SERIOUS the way my f/os (and spam's f/os (plural now?? i guess?? if today was a canon event)) are#honestly mark still feels like the only real one with her to me but damn it. if spam's reflecting My Changes then she's Reflecting My Chang#spam in toontown unlike my other sonas is the most “its just you again” out of all of them and thats partially because her main#cog connection... is frostbite. they bounce off each other like we literally bounce off each other and damn it shes been so stagnant on her#own because of it. mark happened and she mirrored that because i kept fucking talking about him while we were in character and ideally#i should TRY to fix her. but also man because i'm not doing Serious lore stuff with her i dont. even know if i want to.#i kinda brushed it over the rug by saying that she relies on her constant entertainment so readily because she herself still doesnt feel#like she has a place outside of cogs only. sure she's in high roller backstage sure she's in allan's family now but shes not Doing anything#with herself the way that her friends are. mole's a ranger. frostbite cohosts. wishes... has chip. and something she doesn't have--#living and fully growing as a toon. rather than being haphazardly slapped into a world. and in some respects she's envious of frostbite#finding themselves so quickly because she distracts herself because she's still kinda struggling with it. despite everything. yes she lives#happy and carefree a lot of the time but she keeps buying those dumb phones because when she's truly alone... her mind starts to wander.#that's what mark is for. so that spam can dream of a world where she has a purpose. even if its fake and fragile and just nothing compared#to the great friends that she already has. where she feels like its worth it doing something when she doesn't have anyone. and in that#respect. with the goons ma allan parallels in sonboy the spam cathal parallels shine. seeking tv (and to a lesser extent games) as a#method of escapism. even when one's life is already pretty good. because there's nothing else worth doing without friends or family.#the internet isn't just cool. it gives her something to be when it seems like everyone is something but her. and maybe thats a lazy#excuse for why it seems like she doesnt HAVE anything to call her own but that but damn it i'm trying my best to twist it around.#spam has such a HISTORY yknow? even if it feels like i havent established her much.#spam is the hearts to frostbite's spades not just because they're the duo of all time but because spam's fake stupid love keeps her going#sorry i just started rambling in the tags of this post about spam it. happens. she loves her friends so much i need to reiterate that okay
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Hurrrrrrk
😑
I need to just... start collaging all the Tumblr posts and Bible verses I see and read that COULD NOT POSSIBLY BE ANY PLAINER an answer to whatever my prayer/grouse/grumble/rebellion du jour is.
He is not subtle. -_-
#Christian toddler temper tantrum#It's been going on for... months now#It exasperates me no end when I try to give my children a treat and they regard it with suspicion and distaste#And yet for... months. Three months? Four months? I have been shrieking at God#“I DON'T WANT IT!!!” about a blessing He has very blatantly wanted to give me#And He is being SO PATIENT#But I still DON'T WANT IT#I don't CARE if it's for my good and would make me so much happier! I don't want it!!!#I don't want to put in the effort it would require to ready ME for such a blessing#I would rather sit as a squalid little pot in my squalid little corner than undergo the necessary cleansing and crucibling...#(I don't care if I just made that word up) (It's accurate)#I'm TIRED#And I already know what cleansing and crucibling will take#And I dread it#I'd much rather sulk and whine than accept the Good Thing#Sulking and whining is easy and Character Development is not#I am lazy. And tired.#Some years ago I read a book called Hinds Feet On High Places and it was an excellent sequel to Pilgrim's Progress#Just wonderful and I loved reading it#But I find I don't like living it#*Whinge* *whine* Waah waah waah etc...#...anyway He's basically dropping a brick a day on my head now so I think He's maybe about done indulging me and my tantrums so#my options are get my hiney in gear and get ready to accept cleansing and crucibling or I'm just gonna get unceremoniously precipitated#into it (As has been His method throughout my life until recently)
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