#or sleeping over 14hrs straight

[blairwaldcrf]

woke up for more than five minutes for the first time since Friday... i hate it

[suzieb-fit]

Today's afternoon workout was a pilates/barre mix. If I'm completely honest, I don't actually know what the difference is, lol. Both types of training seem very similar to me.

Anyway, I'm always glad to get this kind of session into my day somewhere along the line.

So apart from a few extra miles on the bike due to me going to the town just down the road for my 4th covid jab, today has been an average Tuesday.

I decided on a 14hr fast today, rather than just my current 13hr target, and got another 20 minutes on top of that.

A good day for calories and nutrition, but the nutrition side is no effort. That's just my usual way of eating.

Slightly better sleep, but still a few wake ups and an early fully awake time.

I feel fine after the jab. Pulled my sleeve diwn, put my hacket on, hopped straight vack on my bike. I wasn't hanging about. Massive uphill climb all the way back home!

So it was over in seconds. Ok, I fully expect a bit of soreness, but hopefully that will be the only side effect.

[sialiia]

// doctor appointment went well, taken off one of my sleeping pills. (the pharmacist, nurse and my family doctor were all shocked and worried with my side effects. My doctor had only seen it once before in his practice where someone reacted that way to the sleep meds.... for context. Over the last 6-8 weeks, my symptoms kept getting worse and I was basically just comatose for 14hrs and nothing would wake me up. if I did wake up, the world would spin and i couldn't walk straight. Muscles ached so much I couldn't move in bed... fun time. /sarcasm) But anywho. got some adjustments made. on another note. IT'S HOT OUT AND IM DYIN'

[sdvharveybby]

I would love to have Harvey as a husband just so he would have to see everything I do wrong to take care of myself.

“Honey, I don’t think I’ve ever seen you drink water.” “Sit up straight- that’s why you have back issues.” “Why do you sleep like that? Your neck must be killing you.” “When was the last time you slept?” (or my favorite- the complete 180) “Honey, I think you’ve slept over 14hrs today.” 

All in all- I think if Harvey was my husband I think I’d keep him on his toes, and he would never feel like I’m safe enough to ever take off his doctor hat around me. 

[fatedtruths]

★  OLIVER MEMORIES  001    ★    ▒     IS ALIVE . . .

HE FELT LIKE A LITTLE KID AGAIN.  breath stuttering in his throat, heart suddenly lurching in panic as he heard the harsh words from the other end of the line.   Like the little kid who CRASHED the parties and functions that his parents hosted in his childhood clutching his teddy and wanting his mom because he had had a nightmare and sometimes Raisa just wasn’t enough       ( and she had never turned him away,   his father had always rolled his eyes but his mom always picked him up, put him back to bed, the one situation where she did not care more about their family’s image. )       PANICKED PLEADING injecting itself into his voice.

𝗺𝗼𝗺 !  𝗺𝗼𝗺 ! 𝗽𝗹𝗲𝗮𝘀𝗲  … 𝗷𝘂𝘀𝘁 𝗹𝗶𝘀𝘁𝗲𝗻 𝘁𝗼 𝗺𝘆 𝘃𝗼𝗶𝗰𝗲  . . .   𝗶𝘁'𝘀 𝗼𝗹𝗶𝘃𝗲𝗿. 𝗶'𝗺 𝗼𝗸𝗮𝘆.  𝗶𝘁'𝘀 𝗺𝗲, 𝗷𝘂𝘀𝘁  . . . 𝗽𝗹𝗲𝗮𝘀𝗲 𝗱𝗼𝗻’𝘁 𝗵𝗮𝗻𝗴 𝘂𝗽, 𝗼𝗸𝗮𝘆 ?

he was still shaking when he hung up the phone and gave it back to the Chinese fishermen.   of course Oliver knew the boat was coming,     he knew that it was coming to take him home, that Anatoly had sent it, but he didn’t know how much hearing his mom’s voice was going to rip right through him.   He felt like he was a kid again,  wanting to break down in his mother’s arms, wanting for her to tell him that it’s all going to be okay   ----Like when he had woken up in the middle of the night crying out of his mom-----    God he hadn’t wanted home this much in years.

𝐢 𝐝𝐨𝐧'𝐭 𝐤𝐧𝐨𝐰 𝐛𝐮𝐭 𝐈'𝐦 𝐨𝐤𝐚𝐲 𝐚𝐧𝐝 . . .  𝐚𝐧𝐝 𝐢𝐦 𝐜𝐨𝐦𝐢𝐧𝐠 𝐡𝐨𝐦𝐞

home.  he was going home.       had had the small possibility to do so two years ago, but now he was and he was going home with a MISSION in his soul. The mission, the promise that he made to his father, was THE MOST IMPORTANT thing about going back . . . but for a moment, as he’s hustled off the boat at the port and met by police, men from the us consulate and various security services and medics, he let himself feel everything that he hadn’t let himself dwell on since Slade had shoved a gun in his face.   Every raging inch of longing and grief that ran through him as he watched his family, the people he loved, moving through the world during his ARGUS mission in Starling.  LONGING and GRIEF.

Once more he had to wipe at his cheeks,   a shaky breath and he’s . . . he’s shocked to see the way that his hands are shaking too.   For so long he had been heartless,  didn’t let emotions cloud his mind and now . . .  now it’s just too much

The cops had shouted rapid fire Mandarin at him but he had feigned a lack of understanding that had only ended after his loud exclamation that he needed a translator with the arrival of LAWYERS from QC’s Beijing office.  Lawyers who had gotten him a hotel room in some high rise with promises of a doctor coming to see him. Less than half an hour later he’s standing in the bathroom, looking at himself in the mirror.  He’d chopped the wig up with the scissors he’d requested from the concierge, along with a shaving kit and an electric razor.  The fake facial hair had joined the destroyed remains of the wig in the bin before he had taken the razor to his head.   Closely cropped and with a mirror for the first time IN YEARS,  he didn’t recognize the man looking back at him in the glass. Didn’t recognize the harsh lines and sharp bones or the slightly HAUNTED, SUNKEN EYES that gazed at him.  He wasn’t the same person anymore.

OLLIE QUEEN HAD DIED ON THE GAMBIT.

With a knuckle white grip on the sink he stared at himself, a moment of respite, to gather himself, to get his story straight.  The simpler the better he didn’t know how to tell ------ with a GRIMACE his eyes shut,    his teeth grinding together and his face bowing towards his shoulder as his mind flooded with the worst of the worst from the last five years; Yao Fei, Slade, Sara, Shado, Tatiana, Thea ----Oh god Thea.  A quiet groan ripped from his lips. He didn’t have the words to explain how concerned he was, or to explain the levels of suffering, of agony all of it washing over him  and then the fear and the pain and---  NO..   Forcing his eyes open, meeting his own gaze, his shoulders straightened and he forced a mask of nothing onto his face.     Forcing all of that back down into a box.   HE COULDN’T BREAK DOWN HERE.

𝐢 𝐰𝐚𝐬 𝐚𝐥𝐨𝐧𝐞 𝐨𝐧 𝐭𝐡𝐞 𝐢𝐬𝐥𝐚𝐧𝐝, 𝐝𝐚𝐝  . . .  𝐝𝐚𝐝 𝐝𝐢𝐝𝐧’𝐭 𝐦𝐚𝐤𝐞 𝐢𝐭. 𝐧𝐞𝐢𝐭𝐡𝐞𝐫 𝐝𝐢𝐝 𝐬𝐚𝐫𝐚. 𝐢𝐭 𝐰𝐚𝐬 𝐣𝐮𝐬𝐭 𝐦𝐞 . . .  𝐢 𝐝𝐨𝐧’𝐭 𝐤𝐧𝐨𝐰 𝐰𝐡𝐲 𝐭𝐡𝐞 𝐟𝐢𝐬𝐡𝐞𝐫𝐦𝐞𝐧 𝐠𝐨𝐭 𝐬𝐨 𝐜𝐥𝐨𝐬𝐞 𝐛𝐮𝐭 𝐢’𝐦  ---𝐢’𝐦 𝐠𝐥𝐚𝐝 𝐭𝐡𝐞𝐲 𝐝𝐢𝐝.  𝐰𝐡𝐞𝐧 ? . . . 𝐰𝐡𝐞𝐧 𝐜𝐚𝐧 𝐢 𝐠𝐨 𝐡𝐨𝐦𝐞 ?

It wasn’t as hard to channel the kid he remembered being when the lawyers had come back to see him, not as hard as he had thought it would be.  Not when he was put in front of the POLICE, again,  then the  FOREIGN  OFFICE  and guys from the US CONSULATE .  He was put in front of who he thinks might have been Chinese SECRET POLICE , or SPECIAL FORCES, then there were agents definitely from the CIA. They had all gotten the same wide-eyed, exhausted but no less spoilt rich kid act and they had all clearly fallen for it hook line and sinker.  He almost hated how easy it was to convince them. For a while he let the act drop,  showing a hardened exterior and an endless supply of contempt when ARGUS had appeared in a meeting without his lawyers.     Amanda Waller was still pissed from when he escaped their clutches after the mission they had thrown him onto on Lian Yu,   but there was nothing she could do now, the news story of his survival was already breaking.  THE CAT WAS OUT OF THE BAG.   They had made an agreement of sorts,  Waller stayed away from his family and he kept his mouth shut about his involvement with them.

Like he wanted to tell anyone.

With a shaky sigh he boarded the chartered jet that no doubt his mother had organised to bring him home. Surrounded by FLIGHT STAFF, and the LAWYERS, SECURITY DETAIL and the members of the US GOVERNMENT travelling to help authorize his access into the country when they got there, sleep wasn’t going to come but they didn’t need to know that.   They all wanted to talk, he didn’t.  For once the OLLIE QUEEN that they all remembered was useful.    Though they were exasperated at the rich kid who refused to listen and settled down to nap for the next 14hrs,   no one was really surprised and no one dared snap at him, and no one interrupted him.

It was a long flight but he feigned sleep until touchdown.  Grabbing his wooden trunk before anyone else could as he’s ushered off the plane and into a blacked out car. Yet, for just a moment, he STUMBLED. The airstrip was exactly the same as he remembered,   the same strip that he and Tommy had come and gone from countless times over the years, the same strip where he and his family had gone on holiday.  No one sees the way that he swallows or the way the carefully closed off expression CRACKED as he slid into the back of one of the cars and let the engine attempt to lull the way his skin ITCHED at being surrounded by so many people he didn’t know.

But he knew the doctor who came to meet him at Starling General

DR LAMB had been his family’s doctor for as long as he could remember, he was almost glad to see him. At least he was someone that he knew and Oliver obeyed every medical direction with no objection, with not saying anything really. Although they asked a barrage of question, Although the nurses gasped when they saw the scars and the burns          ( burns that BURNED like a bastard once his attention were drawn back to them . . .   he had brushed off the medics in China, now he’s realizing that maybe he shouldn’t have as he let out a sharp hiss and his eyes pricked as the nurses treated and wrapped the small of his back and the back of his arms   ----he hadn’t been burned before Kovar and Fuck . . .  he would rather be stabbed )      With a glance up, he caught the horror that was fairly well hidden in Dr Lamb’s eyes.   Most questions he DIDN’T answer, some that were more important or they kept asking he finally DID , . . .  with monosyllabic words mostly . . .       It was all a lot.   So much more than he ever thought it would be.   The ACHE in his chest at being somewhere familiar, at having people around him who genuinely cared for his well-being,   looking out across the darkened skyline of Starling City his eyes stuttered closed as he heard the muffled, but god so familiar, sound of his Mom’s voice through the door.  Eyes welling, a lump in his throat,  a harsh twist in the middle of his chest. . .

𝐨𝐥𝐢𝐯𝐞𝐫 . . .  𝐨𝐡 𝐦𝐲 𝐛𝐞𝐚𝐮𝐭𝐢𝐟𝐮𝐥 𝐛𝐨𝐲 !  

he moves stiffly,  barely holding control . . .  and then he fell into his mother’s arms. . .  and HE FELT LIKE A LITTLE KID ALL OVER AGAIN.

[dramaqueeenamby]

Queen {Part 3}

Taglist: @beautifulbashfulblackqueen @lavitabella87 @idilly  @ashanti-notthesinger@palmsofgranate@maliadestiny @blackpantherimagines @texasbama @profilia @90sinspiredgirl@msincognito67@onyour-right  @janellemonaenae @ilcb7 @SUNFLOWER-HOE @chaneajoyyy@amethyst09 @sarcastic-sunshines @melanisticroyalty @forbeautyandlife @fentybabyy@theresnomoregoodones@missumuch1918  @simplyjaydaa @-harmonytbh @simplyyamberr@sisterwifeudaku @purple-apricots @heyauntieeee @youcantkillamutant @tadjoa @mejustme06@bugngiz @aieyr @bamakakechick@blackbypurpose @yourwonderbelle @multipersonalitygirl@chefjessypooh @hamato-rue159@blublubleu @elaindeereads @girlie94 @nubian-queen18@autumn242 @romanticcandle @nubian-queen18 @girl-with-the-pen @headhunchess@afraiddreamingandloving @thatbish27 @almostpurelysmut@blkintrovert @xxthotii @muhhhkrysta@dreamlloudly @k-o-jass @yoyolovesbucky @kileynoelle852@mademoiselleoya  @silentlikethe-g-inlasagna  @bossyboyd03 @royallyprincesslilly @kumkaniudaku@brianabreeze  @bigdaddyashhh@pocoberry @madamslayyy @nyxy97 @imuhhhkrysta@kaykay4454fan @phambili-myking@esther-adri @bluesaladexpertpsychic @vibranium-soul@yoyolovesbucky @syreanne @maverickabull

Words: 2.8K

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Warning: There’s a bit of smut.

Queen

“You wearing a bra?”

“Mama!” You looked down at your ripped shirt that went with your relaxed outfit, the glimpses of your cleavage barely noticeable but, of course, your mother peeped it. “Yes, I am wearing a bra.”

“You don’t need to be showing off ya tidies. Not yet, at least.” You suddenly wondered why you’d even bothered calling her. Sometimes your mom could be a bit much. “And you best not be wearing no heels!”

“Mama!”

“I swear, you young people-“ You tuned her out as you waited for Chadwick’s flight to come in, eventually getting off the phone with her.

You’d met him back in April, shortly before he had to relocate to begin filming his new movie, Captain America: Civil War.

As a writer, you hated cliched terms, but it was a damn near fact that you felt a connection with him from the moment he shot you one of those alluring smiles and introduced himself.

You two crossed paths as part of a segment with Vogue which had the both of you interview each other about your journey to “stardom.” You’d been nervous that the conversation would be forced and awkward. It ended up the complete opposite.

On camera, the questions remained professional. However, once the word ‘cut’ entered the atmosphere, the two of you found yourselves wanting to know more about the other person. Contact information was exchanged, and that was the start of your “relationship.”

Though you and Chadwick hadn’t yet confirmed exactly what you were, your status as a couple was damn near inevitable.

While away for four months, you both talked every day. Whether it be a text, phone call, or FaceTime session, not a day passed where he wasn’t putting a smile on your face or vice versa.

After about a month of talking, he started to send you good morning texts. They began with just the two words, transitioned into the greeting with the blushing smiley face. Finally, he settled on a ‘morning baby.’ with the heart emoji.

Of course, you reciprocated the kind gesture with texting him every evening with a bible verse, usually the one that you read and based your devotional journaling on.

However, on the days where you didn’t get to do your devotional, you’d just find a verse that you felt was right and forward it.

Chadwick, also religious, always seemed thankful for the messages.

And, of course, you two always said good night to each other via the telephone or video chats.

So yes, you considered yourself in a relationship with the actor. You were just waiting for him to confirm it.

“Damn, girl.” Your head shot up as you heard his voice. “Can I talk to you?”

You couldn’t help your giggle as he dropped a line from the inside joke between just the two of you.

You untangled your legs and stood up, taking note of how his eyes trailed across your outfit.

“You been watching me, eh?” You managed a small smirk as you crossed your arms, taking in the sight of him. How could a man who just finished a 14hr non-stop flight from Germany to California look so damn good?

You’d tried to convince him to take an easier flight, one with layovers so that he could at least have breaks, but he wasn’t trying to hear that.

He said he was just ready to get back stateside....and that he wanted to see you, prompting you to play Jodeci’s song, Come and Talk To Me.

Ergo, your little inside joke.

Chadwick licked his lips and beckoned you over with a flick of his fingers. “C’mere, girl.”

You wasted no time in closing the distance, placing your arms around his neck, expecting a hug but surprise overcoming you as he grabbed your jaw and connected your lips.

You were momentarily stunned. Chadwick was such a private man, yet there he was sucking on your bottom lip while his hands moved down to squeeze your ass.

You moaned into his mouth as you realized how much you’d missed kissing him.

However, you also realized that things were about to get too heated for a public environment and, reluctantly, pulled away.

“Welcome back, Mr. Boseman.” You pecked his cheek, smiling as he quietly groaned, his hands still familiarizing themselves with your backside.

“I’ve missed your ass,” he murmured, his thumb feathering across your cheek. “So damn much.”

If you were a white girl, you’d be blushing up a storm. “I can tell.” A cheeky expression as you took a glimpse over your shoulder. “Can’t keep your hands off it, can you?”

He rolled his eyes and tapped your bottom, finally allowing his arms to drop as he went to grab his bag. “Let’s get out of here.” You went to make sure that you hadn’t left anything on the seat when he pulled you into his side and whispered in your ear. “Before you make me show you just how much I missed you in front of all these white folks.”

You elbowed him as you two started walking, his arm wrapped around you. “If you don’t stop before they call security.”

“Good, maybe I can get the video from them to hold me over when I have to leave ag-“

“Chadwick,” you were growing way too flustered from both his uncensored statements and the anticipation of an inevitable sexual experience.

You two had yet to be intimate as you had a two month rule in which you abstained from sex for at least 60 days to ensure that you didn’t put out before you were sure that there was a potential for longevity.

You also required a physical copy of recent testing to ensure that should you decide to engage in unprotected sex (you were on birth control), you’d be safe, something Chadwick provided a week before he informed you that he was returning to the states.

Having recently turned 30, you weren’t interested in dating just to have a boyfriend.

You were seeking a husband.

“Besides, you just got off a 14hr flight,” you reminded with a small shake of your head. “No way you’re up to doing anything but going back home and sleeping.”

Q - U - E - E - N • Q - U - E - E - N • Q - U - E - E - N - Q - U - E - E - N - Q - U -

“Oh yes!” Your throat was raw so much so that you were literally contemplating how you were still able to talk. “Right there, daddy!”

Chadwick grounded his hips into you, prompting your head to drop down as you realized your vision was growing hazy. “Like that, baby?”

You couldn’t force a response and instead nodded furiously as he continued to pound into you from the back.

However, you quickly realized your mistake as his large hand came down on your ass.

“Words.” You continued to fist the sheets, quietly wondering how much longer your knees and arms would be able to hold you up. At the rate he was going, not long. “I wanna hear you say it, my Queen. Say how good this dick make you feel.”

Just him calling you his Queen had you ready to cum. “I-,” a loud and elongated groan left your mouth as he grabbed a handful of your Afro to better direct his powerful thrusts. “I love your-your dick—fuck—i-i-inside me.” Your mouth dropped open as you chowed down on your bottom lip, nearly drawing blood. “God, it feels sooooo good.”

You were suddenly wishing that you 1. accepted his offer to fly you out for a weekend while he was filming and 2. made an exception to your two-month rule.

This man and his paralyzing ten inches were definitely worth risking it all.

Chadwick seemed pleased by your response as he slowed down his movements, giving you a second to catch your breath.

“And this sweet pussy,” you released a rather unladylike like sound as his hand reached forward and started playing with your clit. “It’s mine?” Your eyes were damn near in the back of your head “I asked you a question.” He growled, resuming his bad decision causing pace. “Is it mine?”

“Yes!” You forced out. Honestly, with the way he was wrecking your body, you’d agree to just about anything. “It’s yours. This pussy is all yours.”

“Damn right it is,” tears streamed down your flustered face as he circled his hips. “My name gon’ be the last to leave that pretty lil’ mouth of yours.”

If you were thinking straight, you would have caught his underlying meaning, but then he grabbed you and pulled your back against his chest, his strong forearm across your breast as he continued to rearrange your guts.

“Daddy,” you powered through your exhaustion. “I’m gonna—Oh god—I’m gonna cum.” Your breathing became labored as you dropped your head, your body completely spent.

Chadwick was also nearing his climax as his rapid movements started to slow down. “That’s it, Queen.” You whimpered as he nipped at the back of your neck. “Cum with daddy.”

It was as though your body responded to his commands because right on cue, your juices flowed all over him as his seed spilled deeply into you.

Your mind was so foggy, your thoughts distorted. You weren’t even coherent as Chadwick slowly pulled himself out of you or as he went to go get a towel to clean the two of you up.

It was a good ten minutes later, him resting beside you, the covers pulled over your nude and sweaty bodies before you managed to get a sentence out.

“Can...can we...” Correction, a fragmented sentence. “I-“

Chadwick chuckled and pulled your trembling body into his chest. “Go to sleep, Queen.” If you still actually had feeling below your belly button, you thighs would have clenched just from him calling you that. “We’ll go get breakfast in the morning.”

Your eyes widened. This man just fucked up your whole life with eight inhuman and cervix shattering orgasms over a two hour period and now he was offering to take you out to eat?

Yeah.

Husband material, indeed.

Q - U - E - E - N • Q - U - E - E - N • Q - U - E - E - N - Q - E - E - N - Q - U - E -

“I feel like people are looking at us,” you commented as you wiggled in your booth, wishing that you’d dressed in something nicer. 

Chadwick laughed softly.

“You wanted to come here. I would have taken you someplace nicer-”

“Hey,” you pointed your fork at him. “I don’t wanna hear any slander, okay? Denny’s is a staple, and this French Toast Slam is the GOAT.”

“Mmmhmm. Just make sure that you eat it all.” His smile dropped into a sly smirk as he started to dig into his own Ultimate Omelette. “You gon’ need that energy.” He fell out in laughter at the mortified look on your face.

“A respite?”

“This is the respite.”

“Chadwick, I like being able to, ya know, walk.”

“And I like eating that pretty pussy till’ I see them eyes roll bac-” you quickly looked under the table to kick him, prompting more laughter from the actor.

“Oh my god, you are so inappropriate.” You mumbled, sliding down in your booth and covering your face with your hand, unable to help it as your light laughter forced its way out. “Can I ask you something?”

He nodded, grabbing and shaking the ketchup bottle. “Of course.”

You took a deep breath. “Your ex-” You witnessed the obvious change in his demeanor and started to switch up your inquiry to something less uncomfortable, but you needed to know. “You said you were with her for a little over a year, correct?”

“Yeah.” He offered no other comment as he kept his eyes on his food.

You leaned back in your booth, “Why’d you two break up?” Before he could answer, she inserted. “I told you about my ex.”

Myles was your on and off boyfriend that you met while attaining your masters. He was a nice guy, a hell of a journalist, and the sex was decent, but he wasn’t looking for commitment. It was often why you two broke up and got back together after a few months. However, your last break up, six months before you met Chadwick, ended up sticking. You couldn’t be with someone that you couldn’t see yourself eventually settling down with.

You needed to make sure the same wasn’t going to happen with the man across from you.

“The truth?” He propped a brow. “She was too clingy, only with me for a come-up, her family was too involved and invested in our relationship which also raised alarm, but overall….I couldn’t deal with her immaturity.”

“Let me guess…..possessive and jealous.”

“Extremely,” he shook his hand while recalling his time with her. “She’d get upset with me just for taking pictures with fans or signing autographs.”

“Oh no, that bitch had to go.” You found yourself declaring boldly while taking a bite out of your French Toast. Looking over at Chadwick, you found him staring over at you. You finished chewing and swallowed. “What?”

“I like you, Queen.” It was a simple statement, but his quiet tone sent chills down your spine. “And no, I’m not saying that just because we had sex-”

“Really good sex,” you murmured, putting your elbow on the table and resting your face in your hand as you tilted your head. “No, but I like you too, Chadwick.” You watched as his arm reached across the table to hold your hand, running his fingers over your knuckles. “Talking to you comes so natural and effortlessly: your aura is….welcoming. You have this calmness to you that I really enjoy.” A beat. “And I suppose it doesn’t hurt that I’m immensely attracted to you.”

You didn’t know why or how the hell you two ended up having this conversation is such a public establishment but you both were seated on the far end of the restaurant, and the only other guests were a middle-aged white man and an elderly couple.

“Aside from the fact that you are absolutely gorgeous, you are so intelligent, so talented, and confident in who you are. Your heart is pure, your spirit enticing, and I find myself wanting to know more and more about you.” You smiled warmly at his praise. “And that right there….your smile. It’s infectious. You are infectious. I found myself thinking about you a lot while I was gone….about us.”

“Us?” you slightly raised your brows as you stared at conjoined, brown hands.

“I see us lasting, Queen.” His voice turned serious as he eyed you with amazement. “I see longevity.”

You tried not to expose your surprise at his use of the same word that expressed the exact same thing that you were seeking in a partner. “So...years.”

“In the double digits,” he alluded, and you couldn’t help the way your stomach flustered at how bold he was being.

“I believe in marriage, Chadwick.”

His reply was instant. “So do I.”

Your heartbeat was so erratic, the thrill of your conversation bringing you such happiness. “And kids? I know you said that you like them, but you can like them and not-”

“No more than three.” He answered for you with a small smile on his handsome face while destroying any doubt that you may have had over this recently confirmed relationship. “But the number doesn’t make a difference, I’d be just as happy with one.”

“There is definitely the cutoff point,” you chuckled. “I’m not pushing out anymore over that.”

His eyes twinkled with mischief. “That’s probably a good thing especially if they inherit your big ass forehead.”

The smile on your face dropped as he laughed. “You know what….fuck you, my forehead is big but cute.” You weren’t even upset as you’d made comments about your forehead while on FaceTime with him on more than one occasion. It was something that you were insecure about once upon a time ago but now embraced and jokingly poked fun at.

“It is,” he agreed, finally letting go of your hand so that you two could resume eating. “And I like big.” He commented slyly as you rolled your eyes. He was like this while away for four months but you were surprised that he was being so vulgar in public. “Them titty’s, that ass-”

You arrogantly interjected. “You love my big booty.”

“Mmmhmm. Especially when you throwing it back on my-“

You almost choked on your food.

“Chadwick!”

---

A/N: I gave ya’ll a break from the angst with backstory because only I create a whole story to accompany what was supposed to be a oneshot.

*sighs*

Next chapter returns to the present time, though....

[spn-ficfanatic]

The One Moment- Ch3: Three Months Later...

SERIES MASTERLIST - PART 1 - PART 2 - - -  PART 4

Chapter Summary: It’s been 3 months and you still haven’t told Jared the biggest part of your past. It’s about to come to a head though when Lacey calls him distressed in the middle of the night… where have you gone??

Genre: Angst angst babeh

Words: 2116

Warnings: Mild swearing, alcohol use

Jared rubbed the sleep out of his eyes as his blaring phone woke him up. He glanced at the clock, 10:10pm, and groaned before reaching for his phone. He was surprised to read Lacey’s name on the display and was immediately concerned.

“Lace?” he asked drowsily.

“I’m sorry to wake you Jared but is Y/N with you?” she asked frantically, obviously distressed. Jared sat up, his concern mounting with every passing second.

“No, she said she was sleeping at your place tonight. Hang on, I’ll make sure she didn’t sneak in while I was sleeping.”

Jared kept the phone to his ear and could practically hear Lacey pacing the kitchen while he walked out to his living room. A sliver of streetlight was shining through the slit in the curtain, providing enough light to confirm he was alone.

“She’s not here,” he confirmed to Lacey. “What’s going on? Is she ok?”

“I don’t think so,” she replied with a groan. “It’s just I’ve come home and she’s not here, her hot chocolate’s on the floor, it looks like she left in a hurry and I just… I have a bad feeling.”

“Hang on, her drink is on the floor?” Jared asked.

“Spilt, mug broken, all over the floor.”

He was running back to his room by this point to throw on some clothes. “I’m going to be there in 10 minutes ok, and we’ll figure out… whatever this is, ok? Just hang tight.”

Lacey sniffed and asked him to hurry before hanging up, leaving Jared to finish getting ready and run out the door at full speed.

~~~~~~~

He was out of breath by the time he stopped at your front door, and knocked loud enough to wake the whole floor. Lacey opened the door nearly immediately, holding her phone in one hand.

“No luck reaching her,” she commented, holding the phone up.

“Me neither, I was ringing the whole drive over,” he replied, walking through the threshold and heading to the kitchen. He almost expected to still see the chocolate on the floor, though felt silly when he realized that obviously Lacey would clean it up before he got there.

“Lacey, what’s going on? How scared should I be right now? Because frankly I’m at a 9 already.”

“I’m sorry for scaring you Jared, it’s just… well, how much has she told you about her last job?” she asked him, rubbing her arm nervously. She didn’t want to betray your trust but she couldn’t find you without help after coming off a 14hr shift; she already felt like the walking dead and as much as she loved you and was worried about you, realistically the idea of running across town to find you at this time of night was daunting.

Jared looked at her confused. “What does- never mind. Um, she’s not really told me much. She loved it but there was a creepy guy that scared her off. That’s about it.” He thought back to when you’d first told him about Brad, and while he knew there was more to the story he didn’t want to push it so early in the relationship. And when you started wearing color to work the day after your first date it seemed like you’d completely moved past whatever happened, so he didn’t want to open up old wounds unnecessarily.

“Shit. Ok well, she’ll hate me for this but I think I have to,” Lacey said as she moved to the dining table, shaking her head and saying quietly to herself, “Sorry babe,” while lifting your tablet to Jared. He took it and his eyes were immediately drawn to the headline on the screen.

EARLY RELEASE FOR SERIAL STALKER

Lacey stood beside Jared, not wishing to read the story again and holding her arms across her stomach in an attempt to settle the butterflies flying around in there. She waited impatiently while continuing to check her phone, hoping you’d have the sense to message her. Apparently you didn’t.

“She… it was on this page when you walked in?” Jared asked, turning to Lacey and holding up the tablet.

“Sitting on the kitchen bench. She must have been having her drink when she came across it,” Lacey replied, rubbing her eyes tiredly.

He turned his eyes back to the article, shaking his head. “She never told me.”

“She wouldn’t have wanted to worry you,” she replied, reaching out to rest her hand on his arm. “She just wanted to forget the whole thing. And you helped her do that Jare, she hasn’t had a single nightmare since the night after the club.”

He put the tablet down and started pacing the kitchen, trying to figure out what to do next.

“So, she saw the article and then what? Where would she go if not to my place?”

Lacey looked to the floor guiltily, and Jared didn’t miss it.

“Lace? What is it?”

“She’s really going to hate me for telling you this,” she repeated, shaking her head and sighing. “I mean it; she may not ever talk to me again.”

Jared frowned and crossed the kitchen to her, reaching out to give a reassuring hug. “I’m not going to let that happen ok? I promise.”

She rested her head on his chest and sniffled. I can see why she likes it here, she thought to herself, before pulling away to face him.

“I think she’s at The Elephant.”

He raised his eyebrows in surprise, “The British pub down the street?”

Lacey nodded. “Either there or The Crazy Horse. I thought perhaps if you went to the Elephant, I could check out the Horse and hopefully one of us will bump into her.”

“Wait, back up. Why do you think she’s at a pub of all places?” Jared asked, closing his eyes and rubbing his temple with his forefingers. Lacey started moving around the room, gathering her jacket and purse before pulling your jacket off the hook near the door.

“Sweety, there’s a reason Y/N doesn’t drink. And I promise you it’s NOT for whatever bullshit reason she gave you,” she replied, reaching out to hand Jared your jacket before shrugging her own on. Jared looked at it in confusion and Lacey rolled her eyes. “She left without it and it’s below freezing outside. Cummon Jared, Y/N told me you were smart!”

Jared put on his best Sam-Bitchface but decided to let the comment go. “Yer but, what if you find her instead?”

“I have another for her in my car. The Horse is a bit further away and I’m too tired to walk it. It’s cheaper so she may have headed there, but the Elephant is closer. They were her two favorite places after Brad. Close the door behind you.”

Before Jared realized what was happening Lacey was already out the door and headed to the stairs. He quickly gathered himself and chased after her, closing the door as instructed, hoping he would be the one to find you. But scared of what he would find if he did.

~~~~~~~~~~

You mostly liked this pub for the atmosphere. The guys were fairly gentlemanly, and had the sense to know when a girl wanted to be left alone. You would have been surprised to see your old bartender pal was still working there if you’d been thinking straight at that moment. As it was, all you could think about was having a drink. Lump in throat, you lifted your finger to Mr Bartender to get your usual, and recognition flashed across his face for a moment before pulling your old favorite whiskey off the top shelf.

“My God, Y/N! Haven’t seen you in ages. Where have you been hiding?” he asked, a large smile spreading across his face. You tried to smile but was sure it looked strained, as you shrugged and put your credit card on the counter.

“Just keep them coming for me” you replied quietly, refusing to meet his gaze. His demeanor changed immediately as he poured the drink and laid it by your hand, reaching out to give it a gentle squeeze.

“If you need to talk, just holler ok?” he said kindly before reluctantly walking away to attend to another customer.

You sat on your stool, eyes glued to the glass in front of you. There was a small part of you, the sensible part, that was screaming at you to pull out your phone and call Lacey. You knew she’d be knocking off work right about now, but instead you decided to put your phone on silent. Sighing, you closed your eyes and threw the drink down your throat, relishing in the burn before lifting your hand to request another double.

~~~~~~~~~

Jared couldn’t help but think back on the last 3 months as he jogged down the street, snow crunching beneath his feet. He smiled as he remembered the first day you’d come to work after your first official date. Bright pink dress, purple scarf, blue jacket and yellow knee-high boots; you were basically a walking rainbow and he loved it. He caught a few people whispering about Eric’s new assistant, and wondering what happened to Y/N. He couldn’t help but laugh whenever he heard them, earning him a few odd glances. A couple even checked their backs to make sure he hadn’t stuck a “kick me” note on them before slowly backing away from him.

His smiled turned to a frown as he found himself standing at the entrance of The Elephant. He took a deep breath before pushing the doors open, not really knowing what to expect. As it was he was pleasantly surprised to find it was a classy joint, with soft jazz playing in the background. He stood by the door, eyes scanning the crowd before falling on your slumped body at the counter.

“Shit,” he commented quietly, before making his way over to you. As he did he pulled out his phone to text Lacey, ‘Got her’, and pocketed it as he reached you. He was concerned when you didn’t even look up at him, so he pulled out the stool next to you and sat, laying your jacket on the counter.

“Bloody Lacey,” you said, laying your head on the bar and resting your arm over the top to avoid looking at your boyfriend. “How much did she tell you?” you mumbled.

“Enough. I’d like it if you told me the rest though,” Jared said quietly, reaching out to run his fingers through your hair. You moaned, before batting his hand away.

“That’s not fair, you know I love when you do that,” you told him, raising your head to look at him via the mirror behind the bar; it seemed like a good stepping stone to actually looking him directly in the eyes.

“Christ Y/N,” said Jared, taking in your puffy bloodshot eyes and rosy cheeks. He was alarmed to see you like this, and swiftly took the rest of your drink and downed it in one go.

“What the fuck Jared, that was mine,” you complained, reaching out to take the empty glass before huffing when finding it empty and putting it back down on the bar hard.

“You’re cut off,” he said sharply, indicating to the barman that you were done. He nodded with obvious relief on his face, and took the card that Jared held out instead of charging yours. Jared turned back to face you, and could see you were having trouble focusing. “Shall we go back to my place?” he asked gently.

You shook your head and replied, “staying here.”

“Yer, hun that’s not happening. My bed is much comfier than this bar counter I promise. And something tells me you’ll be getting acquainted with the toilet bowl soon enough.”

You wrinkled your nose in disgust, before shrugging and nodding in agreement. That apparently was a bad idea though because you groaned and put your hand to your head, closing your eyes tightly. Jared frowned and reached out to take your hand in his, gently pulling you to a nearby booth instead. You sat down and he was grateful that the barman followed with your jacket and a glass of water.

“I’m glad you’re here mate. That was the last drink I was going to give her, I swear.”

Jared nodded and thanked him, before placing the drink at your lips. “Drink,” he instructed, and was thankful you did so without argument. Once you sat the glass down he reached for your hands again, wrapping them in his own that seemed twice that size as yours.

“Please talk to me,” he begged, and you dared to look into his eyes.

Part 4 HERE

“Everything” Tag List - @angelsandwinchesters , @grace-for-sale, @growningupgeek

“The One Moment” Tag List - @pansexualmoose, @winchester-writes, @winchester-lover999, @fandomoniumflurry, @oneshoeshort, @ellen-reincarnated1967

[irenicnomad]

Struggle day (unknown), account 1

It's 7:30 pm. I have 13-14hrs left to finish with the portions for the exam tomorrow. 10am, Locomoter exam. It's hard. It has a lot of anatomy. Im bad at it because my memory is weak. Also because the subject is dry. I dont like studying what is superficial.

I dont have just anatomy to study for. I need to finish physiology, embryology, histology, biochemistry, pathology, pharamcology, and xommunity medicine for the same Locomoter module. (Thank God microbiology is out). All in 13-14hrs. I need to skim through topics i never studied before. Topics whose classes i havent all attended.

But? Im depressed.

I had a fight/argument with my sisters over my parent's childishness. It was bad. I hoped since a long while now that my only purpose, then, was to bribg my family together, close, with strong foundations of trust and love and loyalty and respect and understanding.

After that fight, I realized its impossible. I dread a future where my sister will walk their own paths, drifting away from each other, from family. Because those are not family values. I thought we were one. Are we? Are we a dysfunctional family. We are. Hence why i made a promise, a purpose, to bring my family together. To fix each other. To bring us all as one.

I wasnt the problem. My sisters werent. My parents werent. We all were, together, the problem. I worked to fix myself. I made sure i was more leniant, understanding, thoughtful, and soft with the other members of my family. I worked. I listened. I had their backs. I hid what they wanted to be hidden. I was there for them. Over all, i listened and understood.

Did they do the same? No.

Did i tell them about my promise? No. I didnt see the need to. If you promise, then work on it. I dont believe in what is verbal. I believe in what must be done.

I learned. What was the point to fight for, when youre the only one fighting for? They werent fighting against me. But they werent fighting for each other.

Why does everything have to revolve around one member of the family? Why the selfishness? Why the narcissm? Why the lack of understanding? No body wants to listen. But everybody wants to be heard.

I was never heard. I was always the only one listening. Always apologizing for my sisters and parents behaviors. Always taking in their mistakes and blaming myself for it. Everything was my fault to them.

I pray im not being selfish. I despise that character.

Oh i pray i pray.

My second sister though, she is a fighter too. Stronger than i am. She is as musch as i am in the pursuit of bringing the family construct together.

Atleast. Im happy. Atleast. Even if it werent for me. Atkeast she is doing it for the other members.

Im depressed. Ive scrolled through insta aimlessly. Through twitter, hoping for new words, but came out worse. Through facebook, aimlessly. Oh amd so many other apps.

Im still laying in bed. My eyes burn from the tears ive shed after the fight. The tears that fear my family's fate: loss, being apart, being strangers. Ive grown tired of fighting.

And i dont want to eat either. My stomach's growling. I dont want to eat. I want to stay hungry.

Also, i havent prayed all 5prayers for 3-4 days straight. I didnt want to. I couldnt. I couldnt get myself to wudhuu. I couldnt get myself to pray. Mentally. Physically i maybe capable. But mentally, i was dead.

I need sleep. I need to sleep this dread off my system. But i cant because of my tight time with trying to finish studying for my exams.

It eats your head. Knowing you never 'really' had parents. I trust neither. Neither listened to me. Neither were there for me. It was always about themselves. Never their children.

Here is my account so far. I feel miserable, and melancholic. Just minutes after i wiped my tears, i visioned myself hanging off the ceiling of this hostel room.

(Im tired. I want to give up. I want to fail this exam. Again.

(,yes my writing is very basic. Yes there are typos. But i cant bring myself to brush up on my writing, and proofread. Im sorry anum if ive failed you.)