#or there's a shitload wrong with it

[salesmain]

three very promising homes popped up that we're gonna see this weekend. and one is .. a TUDOR

[simcardiac-arrested]

never volunteer for anything university related man. also go listen to this

[campbenji]

I miss jwcc, I miss watching the new seasons with my sister I miss freaking out about certain scenes with everyone I miss theorizing when the trailers were coming out I miss watching the fanart I miss how happy this show made me aaaaaaaaagghhh

[professorfcknmoriarty]

me talking to my sibling and trying to figure out why tf we watched so many goddamn charlton heston films as kids

we're a decade apart in age, and remember watching the exact same films of his soooo many times

[caffeinatedopossum]

So apparently, for years, a handful of my spontaneous "panic attacks" have actually been from asthma. O_O I was panicking because I COULDN'T FUCKING BREATHE

"It's just anxiety" I hate you + hammer car explosion + dungeon for 2 thousand years + ratio

"Just breathe" well NO FUCKING WONDER that wasn't working for me!! My dumbass thought I was just doing something wrong but I literally physically could not breathe

[snaggletoothedbastard]

i love when people shit on frodo and say sam shouldn't have helped him or saved him and should have let him fucking die because i just want to say to them, "are you calling sam stupid? i thought you liked him."

[poorly-drawn-character-concepts]

I feel like Taco Bell should bring back their logo from 1994 to 2016 because it's very like Nightcore vibes and The main people who shop at Taco Bell are stoners at 3:00 a.m. And to anyone who says something like blah blah I eat at Taco Bell. You're lying. Nobody just like goes to Taco Bell regularly. You either plan it or you see it on the side of the road. Nobody goes there like every other day and if you do, you are the negligible under 1% amount. In your opinion doesn't matter so ha

[beddhead-red]

Saint's Row will always be one of those franchises where there are very serious issues to criticize, but everybody always criticizes the wrong things.

There is a very real reason to dislike 3 & 4 when you look at what they represent for the franchise but everybody just likes to repeat "get woke go broke" 3000000x over

[valeffelees]

goofy wild take here but, um. i actually don't think making jokes at the expense of cluster b personality disorders is funny!!! i don't think it's hahaha jokes to imply all the worst characters you can think of in media have a cluster b!!!!!! i think that's really shitty actually!!!!!! and yeah i know lots of writers give characters like this a cluster b pd but imo that's shitty too!!!!!!! and bad writing!!!!!!! SILLY of me i know!!!!!!!!

[crabussy]

hey there, I’m speaking from personal experience. frequent experience. and also as someone who was bullied and mistreated for most of my life by my peers. you don’t have to listen to this advice but I at least want you to know I’m not some naive overly-trusting person who has always had people be kind to him. I’m sorry you feel this way about being kind, I don’t want to assume anything about you, but in most cases people feel this way because they’ve been taken for granted and treated unkindly. if that’s the case for you, I’m really sorry, and I get it. being kind feels like a ridiculous approach when people haven’t been kind to you. you don’t have to, but I’d encourage you to just try it. just once.

I hope you have a good day [:

I'm so serious about being kind above all else. it has genuinely changed the way I interact with the world on a fundamental level and has made me so so much happier.

[ghost-in-the-stalls]

Moving is already so fucking stressful but this time I'll be in a position where if something falls through, I won't be able to just fix it myself. And that's so much worse

[whoreash]

ghetto gatsby ──★ ˙🍓 ̟

you and itoshi sae were on opposite sides of the car— unaturally.

why is that? he pissed you— the fuck off— that’s why.

there were some things as his manager and soon-to-be-wife that you understood— but, jesus christ, did he have to fuck up with his biggest sponsor?

itoshi sae was a mean, mean man and he, surely, didn’t make things easier for you.

“hey, babeee,” the usual beginning of an apology from sae, acting all innocent as if he didn’t just create a shitload of paperwork and calls for you. “don’t be angry at me.”

no answer— rightfully so. your gaze followed the trees outside, ignoring every word and sound made from your fiancée. because, sure, he’s done things like this before, but not at the sponsor’s own event. and, definitely, not directly to his face.

it was as if he was asking for an argument with you.

“i, really, didn’t do anything wrong,” ahh, so now he’s in the right?

you could choke sae right now. and, of course, he has to act all unbothered, a perfect way to react to your silence. that will, clearly, help his case.

“you, literally, called him a dick.”

“only because he was rude to me. and you.”

“itoshi,” at that, his gaze led to you, the name uncommon to him, especially from you. “you lost our biggest, fucking, sponsor.”

“who needs a sponsor, anyway? i can handle myself.” sae mutters, his careless personality overpowering any sense of urgency.

“your whole marketing team is, practically, gone, your retirement is fucked and a lot of your salary is due to them,” you answer, looking over at sae, eyes hooded from pure anger “so tell me, how much of that can you handle?”

he lets the silence sit in the car— because he has no idea. he has no idea about any of it.

“you’re going to apologise to him.” the earnestness in your voice, worries sae— but he doesn’t show it. rather, he lets his usual self answer.

“i’m not apologising. i did nothing wrong.” sae’s stubborn character was something you got warned about before becoming his manager. luckily, you weren’t one to lose in arguments.

“itoshi sae. you will apologise and i don’t want you fucking up like this, ever, again.”

you’re met with silence yet again, eyeing sae’s facial expression— inspecting the tug of his brow and roll of his eyes. he’s avoiding your gaze— a sign of his loss.

“will you kiss me, if i say yes?”

“what—“ you look at sae, with a ‘are you fucking kidding me’ look, which is only met with a silent plead from his eyes “okay, yes! i’ll give you a, fucking, kiss,”

sae nods and mutters a ‘i’ll do it’ before sitting, waiting, expectantly, for the kiss he was promised.

“you’re so stupid.”

are the last words that leave your mouth before you lean over the backseat and give sae an open-mouthed kiss. exactly, the one he likes. you, really, were too kind to him. whatever. you couldn’t care less when his tongue, gently, prods into your mouth— sharing your saliva.

you, definitely, didn’t care when his hand moved to grasp onto your hip, the other angling your head. sae knew how to lower your defenses, and you let him. every single time.

the argument will have to wait, because right now, sae’s wayyy too distracted by you and your body and your lips— which won’t change later but, oh well.

he’ll apologise, but, he can’t promise this won’t happen again.

after all, itoshi sae got a fuck ton of hate sex after.

[muniimyg]

𐙚₊˚⊹ bbydaddy!yoongi (4) ⋆𐙚₊˚⊹

series m.list // taglist

🏷️ permanent taglist: @joonsjuice @pamzn @defzcl @whoa-jo @taetaecatboy @jksusawife @un06 @firesighgirl @rrosiitas @butterymin @parkinglot-nights @musicjournalsjdb @kissyfacekoo @jkslvsnella @vampcharxter @bloopkook @somehowukook @bbystarcandykoo @ddanasjk @luvismenu @remgeolli @parapiop7 @lil0u0 @crazyovayou @mggv97 @thvgukk @rpwprpwprpwprw

//

when yoongi calls to confirm the results of the blood test, reality hits all over again. 

you’re pregnant. 

his voice was gentle, with the same calm professionalism he uses with all his patients… but it couldn’t mask his genuine warmth as he told you the news. you want to believe he sounded excited but it was hard to tell. you settle for the telling warmth in his tone instead.

hearing it out loud brought a whole new set of feelings—joy, fear, and then something else: the unavoidable question of how you’d tell your friends.

having a clingy friendgroup is not for the weak. 

but having a clingy adult friend group—the kind who carve out time for you amidst career chaos, endless emails, and hectic schedules—is something else entirely. 

they’re the type who know what you’re thinking before you can even say it. the type who catch your tone shifting over text and who will show up unannounced if they don’t hear from you for a day. they mean well, but keeping things under wraps with them is practically impossible.

which is why telling them worries you. 

you can’t hide it.

you know you can’t.

truth be told, you don’t want to. they’re your friends and you love them to death. this baby is worth every second of celebration.

the thought had barely settled before it started to plague you.

how exactly do you explain this to a group of people who work together? who run a whole practice together? a group who’ll want to plan out everything with you, to fuss over you like you’re a ticking time bomb, and who—above all—will probably have a shitload of questions you don’t have answers to. 

they’re the people you’ve shared birthdays with, career changes, heartbreaks, and random tuesday nights. now you’re going to share this news, but there’s no manual on explaining an accidental pregnancy to your closest friends without it sounding like a rom-com gone wrong.

a part of you already know how they’ll react. 

they’d be thrilled, supportive, maybe a little over-the-top. 

and then confused.

yoongi?

as the father?

… what, when, where, and why?

not that he’s a bad guy or anything but simply because there were no (obvious) moments that led up to this…

regardless, it’s like you can almost hear jimin’s gasp, feel jin’s bear hug, and imagine hyemi tearing up before tackling you in her usual affectionate way.

they’ll want to be there for every step of this (probably more than you can handle) but that’s the beauty of having friends who genuinely make the time… friends who go out of their way to show up—not just when it’s convenient but because they want to. they’re the type who, as adults, choose each other over and over again despite life’s demands. 

you all take pride in being involved in each other’s lives—big moments, small moments, and now…

this moment.

but exactly how much is there to be proud of when you explain how nasty you and yoongi were with each other?

how this mess could’ve been avoided if you didn’t beg for him to creampie you?

yeah…

that’s a tough one.

as you’re still trying to figure out how to break the news, your timer dings.

you pull the last tray of brown butter oatmeal chocolate chip cookies from the oven, the warm smell of melted chocolate filling the kitchen. you set the tray down with a sigh, hoping a night of stress-baking will take the edge off. but before you can even start on another batch, there’s a knock at your door.

before you can think to answer, hyemi is already pushing it open, holding an expensive wine bottle aloft like a trophy, her eyes alight with excitement.

“hyemi—”

“wine night!” she grins, crossing the room without hesitation, snagging a cookie from the cooling tray as she pushes the wine bottle toward you.

you catch the label and gasp. a prized chateau margaux. the kind of bottle she probably saved up for weeks (or borrowed namjoon’s credit card) to buy.

“you did not…” you say, eyes wide.

“oh, but i did,” she giggles, giving you a wink. “thank you, namjoon.”

you shake your head, a smile tugging at the corner of your mouth. “i knew it.”

“well?” she nudges the bottle toward you. “what are you waiting for? let’s open this and—”

you hesitate, trying to find the words. “i… i can’t tonight… or for the next few months.”

her smile falters. she clutches the bottle closer, looking genuinely wounded.

“w-wait, what? but—i fought namjoon for this, you know? and you’ve wanted this bottle for forever!”

“hyemi, i have to tell you something—”

“are you breaking up with me?” she jokes, only half-serious as she takes another bite of her cookie.

you roll your eyes and grab the cookie back from her hand, taking a bite yourself.

“it’s not you, it’s me.”

she laughs, swiping the cookie back with a shrug. “so what is it? and holy shit, these cookies are insane—”

“i can’t drink.”

“why? you’ve gone to work hungover before.”

you struggle to find the words, fingers tightening slightly around the bottle in your hands.

“no, it’s not that. it’s… different.”

hyemi’s brow furrows, her eyes narrowing as she peers at you, picking up on your hesitation. “what? don’t tell me you’re on some sober cleanse or something.”

“no… hyemi, i…”

“i mean if you are, i totally support you. i just think there’s too much good wine in this world and not enough time—”

“i’m pregnant.”

hyemi’s jaw drops, her eyes widening. her mouth opens and closes in shock, but before she can get a word out, there’s a loud crash behind you both.

you whip around to see the rest of the guys standing at the doorway.

jimin is frozen, a shattered wine bottle at his feet, red liquid pooling across the entryway as he stares at you in wide-eyed disbelief.

your eyes lock with yoongi’s, who stands in the middle of the group, his expression soft and steady as he takes you in. he tilts his head, just slightly, a quiet, unspoken reassurance passing between you two. you can feel your heart hammering, cheeks burning as you try to focus on anything other than his gaze.

the silence stretches for a beat too long before taehyung breaks it. 

“mommy?”

this isn’t exactly how you pictured them reacting to the news. 

as you sit on your couch, the atmosphere feels heavy. they’re in disbelief, and the only way they know how to process it is by falling into their medical roles.

nam joon and jin, being the doctors they are, sit close to you and begin a quick physical assessment and blood pressure test.

nam joon carefully rolls up your sleeve, a comforting smile on his face that softens the tension in the room. 

“just relax your arm for me,” he hums, positioning the cuff around your upper arm. his fingers brush against your skin, and you can’t help but notice how professional he is, even amidst the whirlwind of emotions flooding the room.

“you’ve been feeling okay, right? any nausea or dizziness?” he asks, focusing intently on the task at hand.

“tired. sleepy. think i’m nauseous the most, though,” you admit. “i throw up… like every other day.”

he nods, squeezing the bulb to inflate the cuff. “that’s completely normal.” he pauses, glancing up at you. “are you okay? emotionally and mentally?”

you nod, glancing around the room. “i’m fine.” 

your eyes meet yoongi’s.

he’s seated directly across from you, leaning forward, elbows on his knees, fingers interlaced. he’s watching you intently, with his usual cool indifference masking an intensity in his gaze. yoongi’s quiet presence anchors you, even though he says nothing.

should he say something?

what does he even say?

you don’t know.

he doesn’t know either.

as the cuff tightens around your arm, you take a deep breath, catching the supportive glances from everyone else nearby. their chatter fades into the background as nam joon’s focus brings you back to the moment.

“okay, let’s see what we have here,” nam joon murmurs, watching the gauge as the cuff slowly deflates. “hmmm. your pressure’s a little high but good overall. are you stressed?”

“a little right now,” you exhale. “guys, this is too much—“

“did you just do a home pregnancy test or go to the doctor?”

you freeze.

“oh shit,” taehyung calls from the doorway. he’s just been helping jimin and hobi clean up spilled wine. “screw the pregnancy test stuff—i wanna know who the babydaddy is.”

from the back, you hear jimin and hobi laugh as they finish picking up glass shards. taehyung raises a teasing brow. 

“okay but seriously… didn’t know you wanted a baby that bad, ___. could’ve just asked jungkook to help you out.”

yoongi straightens, shooting taehyung a sharp look. “alright. we good here? you guys did a quick physical and checked her blood pressure—”

“your babydaddy is clean, right?” jimin chimes in, feigning seriousness. “___, i hope he’s worth the labor and delivery.”

“oh my god. shut up,” you say, rolling your eyes.

it’s then that you glance at hyemi, who sits on the other side of the couch with jungkook. the two of them are stress-eating your cookies, crumbs dotting the space between them.

hyemi, chocolate smeared at the corner of her mouth, raises a brow. “is this why you’ve been so sick?”

“yeah,” you nod. “i got the confirmation yesterday.”

“yesterday?” her eyes widen, and she sets down the cookie, scooting closer to you. “oh my god, ___. this is huge! congratulations!” she grabs your hands, her excitement lighting up her face. “we’re happy about this, right? you want this?”

before you can answer, she wraps her arms around you, pulling you into a tight hug. you let yourself sink into her warmth, feeling the tension unravel.

“yes, i want this. ahhh! don’t make me cry,” you whisper, fighting back tears as you pull back, smiling through it. “god, it’s the pregnancy hormones.”

“already?” she gives you a small, amused smile and wipes at her eyes, fixing your hair. “i’m just so happy for you, ___. you’re going to be the best mom. seriously.”

“as long as her blood pressure stays stable—”

hyemi swats at him. “nam joon, shut up, yeah?”

yoongi lets out a quiet chuckle, leaning back with his hands in his pockets as he watches everyone swarm around you. though he’s giving his usual cool exterior, there’s something in his eyes—a soft, almost possessive gleam that’s hard to miss.

from the corner, jungkook sneaks in, sliding a little closer to you. 

“so,” he begins with a grin, “guess i’ll have to start calling you a milf now, huh?”

yoongi stiffens, jaw clenching almost imperceptibly, his eyes narrowing at jungkook. the tension isn’t lost on you as jungkook’s shoulder brushes against yours, and yoongi shifts in his seat, his gaze hardening in a way that feels oddly protective.

“so, seriously… who’s the babydaddy?” taehyung drawls from across the room, folding his arms with an amused smirk. “he’s clean, right? or should we head to the clinic and run a few tests? just to keep you and baby safe… big news and all, so we’re just trying to make sense of it.”

“god, you’re all insane.” you huff.

“maybe let ___ breathe,” yoongi mutters instantly. his gaze flicking between you and jungkook with a faintly annoyed look. “yah, she just confirmed she’s pregnant. that’s it.”

“that’s it,” you sigh repeating him. then, feeling a small wave of relief. “and honestly, why are the nurses in this room so immature? who can i report you guys to?”

jimin, taehyung, and jungkook laugh. 

“our bosses,” they reply in unison, completely unbothered.

the warmth of their support fills the room. 

as you soak in the moment, hyemi’s watchful eyes drift to yoongi.

he’s now casually seated beside you, close enough that his knee brushes against yours. every now and then, his hand lightly hovers by your arm or shoulder, his touch lingering just a little longer each time. hyemi tilts her head, something slowly clicking in her mind.

“wait a second,” she says, raising a brow. “yoongi… did you know about ___’s pregnancy before the rest of us?”

the room quiets, all eyes shifting to yoongi. before he can answer, jungkook—oblivious to the weight of the question—leans forward. 

“oh shit… is that what her blood test was for at the clinic? i might’ve accidentally seen the paperwork but didn’t peek—thought she was low on iron or something.”

silence falls over the room, each of them piecing things together. one by one, their eyes dart between you and yoongi, confusion shifting to surprise until jin’s eyes widen with realization.

“…wait,” jin’s voice is soft but full of shock.

yoongi keeps his gaze steady on you. 

his expression softening as he takes your hand, giving it a reassuring squeeze. his thumb brushes over your knuckles, a small smile tugging at his lips. it’s subtle but full of meaning, and you feel warmth pool in your chest, despite the tension.

then taehyung breaks the silence, his eyes wide, mouth slightly open as he points at yoongi with dawning realization.

“...daddy?”

[tacagen]

just came back to this and realized i really formulated it vaguely so you cant even say what i actually implied. elaborating: his ASS was CONVICTED after his first fight with barry and 100% on all the news since 'nothing ever happens in this damn time'!! his NAME is DIRECTLY LINKED TO THE REVERSE-FLASH IN THE ARCHIVES RIGHT BEFORE F*NISH L*NE!! NOT MENTIONING HIS 21ST CENTURY HISTORIC ACTIVITY(tho idk how exactly that works considering there are variants where reverse-flash's identity didnt make it to 25th century but there should be SO much documentation in 1 iron heights 2 ccpd+court since there mustve been trials to put him there in the first place 3 flash museum as it already existed in 21st century, using the information from 2 other sources above (which well. above all must be completely digitalized by 4 freakin centuries after. like cmon TF were they up to for that entire time if it didnt include making the info easier to access/find/etc at least once) so i cant see how that could possibly happen except for eo throwin all that shit fuck outta window at some point to keep the mystery for his pre-reverse era but then again he still needs all that info to check his own history and all the changes and it was shown to be in the archives (collected by other people before him) so? man i wish timey wimey actually made at least some sense in at least 1 flash variant. is it really too much to ask.)!! NO WAY THE KNOWLEDGE IS NOT PUBLIC!! EVERYBODY KNOWS!! ESPECIALLY PEOPLE WHO KNEW HIM FROM HIS PRE-SPEEDSTER ERA!! NOT EVEN MENTIONING THE MUSEUM STAFF SOME OF WHICH FALL ON THE PREVIOUS SPECTRUM AS WELL!!!! AND NO ONE CAN DO ANYTHING ABOUT IT CAUSE THE ONLY PRISON CAPABLE OF HOLDING SOMEONE OF HIS SPECTRE OF POWERS AGAINST THEIR WILL WAS BUILT BY HIM FOR PARADOX SINCE APPARENTLY HE IS THE ONLY COMPETENT PERSON OUT THERE and, well. thawne is obvs not stupid enough to include in the design his own cell (btw. does this mean that thawne as a time travelling time altering genius TM could be the one responsible for the complete incompetence and poor anti-meta/speedster equipment of police/gov forces/etc and lack of means of detention around his time so that he can do his silly little museum work and scheming (AND get to be the hero in case some outside force attacks since again no other compenent people and actual means of defence but him//renegades created by him and hunter??) and well. generally existing peacefully without worrying about getting imprisoned here too considering that even 21st century iron heights does, in fact, have the necessary kinds of technologies and use it successfully on meena and august and whoever else (not mentioning it was PERFECTLY CAPABLE to contain thawne himself for some time) because there REALLY is no other fucking explanation on how THOSE of ALL things are lost and forgotten in 25th as well.). the central city of 25th century just has to live with the fact there is this murderous speedster that still works a normal job, can do pretty much anything with the city and time itself (but actually usually doesnt because hes hyperfixated and busy running his precious museum but yk threat is still there.) and no one can stop him from it and with being fully aware of it all. also if it wasnt enough at least PART if not majority of 25th century public actually thinks he IS a hero after the paradox's defeat. the internet arguments about him must be unmatched. also i think he (and his museum tours especially) is an obscure tourist attraction now. like cc's people at this point be like look at our local little deranged squeak squeak from the flash museum that basically owns the city and can do whatever he wants and also dies an unreasonable amount of times regularly. his appearance was foretold by flash's history because that rat can time travel and you can literally see him both on display and explaining all that including his involvemet live on his museum tours. so silly. so fucking insane. where else could you possibly have this.

typed some Thoughts in the tags but then realized it should be a separate post.

[tgcg]

parallel movement

[1]===============================================

TG: no rose look were dj crabapple so when we hang out its a mashup i dont get what the problem is

TT: Disregarding the unsavoury implications of you "mashing up" with Karkat, I find it very interesting that you won't even say the word.

TG: i dont need to say the word because it is not even relevant to the situation it is lightyears away dude youre lost in fuckin space with this

[2]==============================================

GA: Very Well Then

GA: Tell Me Karkat What Did You Do Yesterday Again

CG: WE WENT TO SEE A RERUN OF THE EARTH MOVIE "SHARK TALE (2004)" ON ITS "VENICE FILM FESTIVAL PREMIER ANNIVERSARY" OF SEPTEMBER 10TH.

GA: You Remembered All That

CG: YES?

GA: Well

CG: ????

GA: So Anyways You Had Gone To See A Movie Together

CG: YES, KANAYA. BUT KEEP YOUR IGNORANCE-SHAFT'S LOWER MANDIBLE FROM CRATERING THE GROUND JUST YET, BECAUSE WE EVEN HAD A *MEAL* AFTERWARDS!

GA: Interesting

GA: And At What Time Did You Eat Together

[3]==============================================

TG: i dunno man like 7:40:13 pm we didnt book so we had to wait a shitload of time but thats irrelevant

TT: So you had dinner together?

TG: i swear to god if youre on this psychoanalysis non sense again im gonna flip

TG: dont you dare lift your hand up and stroke your chin in consideration with that index finger and hum in a thoughtful tone dont you do it

[4]==============================================

GA: Hmmm

CG: WOW! NOW YOU'RE EVEN STOOPING SO LOW AS TO REPLICATE LALONDE'S CONTEMPTIBLE LITTLE "PSYCHOANALYSIS" ROUTINE. CLASSIC! WHY DON'T WE JUST INVITE HER OVER HERE RIGHT NOW SO I CAN PROSTRATE MYSELF FULLY TO THE WHOLE AUDIENCE! BUT GASP, WATCH AS THE PERFORMER SKIRTS AROUND THAT THINKPAN-MELTING PITFALL LIKE AN ANGELIC FUCKING BALLERINA ROUND THE TRAPDOOR, BECAUSE THAT HOLE LEADS STRAIGHT TO--

GA: Karkat Please Relax Im Just Trying To Ascertain How Your D-

[5]==============================================

TG: --mashup

TT: "Mashup" went.

TG: yknow whats funny i dont ever hear an usher raymond iv of that word while you and kanaya are all tuckin each others hair behind yalls ears and blushing demurely

TT: You have it all wrong, Dave; Kanaya and I's regular meetings of intercultural exchange are just that, not --

[6]==============================================

CG: HMMMMM.

GA: Touché

[arreat]

more Poolverine shit cause the hyperfixation is not fading

Logan has issues with abandonment and being alone, anyone who knows anything about his past could probably guess this. So when Wade W Wilson barrels into his life to drag the sad alcoholic out of his miserable world, invites him to live together, and gives him what is essentially a new lease on life, it’s a little bit of an understatement to say Logan got a little attached to Wade.

Now this would all be fine and dandy if Logan didn’t have a shitload of trauma and all, but hey I wouldn’t be writing this if things went smoothly would I?

While with Wade, Logan has gotten irreversibly attached to him. The banter, the domesticity, and the feeling of being accepted by someone is something Logan hadn’t felt in a while. He can’t ever get fully drunk due to his dealing factor, but god, Wade’s kindness and adoration makes him feel like he’s pretty fucking close. But as the two spend more time together, Logan is always waiting for the other shoe to drop, for him to do something that will disappoint Wade and damage their relationship. What if Wade kicks him out, or even worse, slowly realize the Wolverine isn’t actually worth helping? Logan can’t help but think that one day Wade will stop being impressed by him since he’s no longer useful, just a sad, washed-up, alcoholic tool that’s only occasionally handy for timeline saving.

So, Logan makes himself useful. Cooking for the two, cleaning the living space, trying to find a job to cover rent, taking care of the dog, Logan does it all in a desperate attempt to stay in his perception of Wade’s good graces. Wade certainly doesn’t complain about it, offering to help on occasions but being refused by a grumpy Wolverine.

What brings the status quo all crashing down one day is a simple comment from Wade before they’re about to head to bed,

“Hey peanut, you consider ever moving out?” Of course to Wade, it was just a harmless question, giving Logan an out in case he preferred living without a chatty ADHD cancer tumor and a blind woman in a cramped area. So when Logan suddenly tenses aggressively as his breaths become more laboured, Wade is confused. Suddenly, all of the possible things Logan has done “wrong” flashed through his head. Was it because he accidentally stabbed Wade while sleeping? Was he too harsh on the merc, telling him to shut up? Did he snore too loud, or did Wade just get sick of the close proximity? For all the joking Wade did, Logan couldn’t get a proper read on what he actually meant. The Wolverine slowly stood up and faced Wade, voice barely audible and breathing harshly.

“Wade. Are you telling me to move out?”

“You doing ok there peanut? Feel your water break or something?” Wade joked weakly, surprised by the sudden change in Logan’s demeanour, failing to lighten the mood. In fact , the deflection made Logan’s expression even worse, as he thought Wade was just being nice and not explicitly stating he wanted him out of here. At this moment, Logan realizes he is not above begging to stay with the merc. He can’t bear to look at Wade as he stammers,

“Please don’t make me leave, I promise I’ll be useful to you, tell me what you need me to be. Please.” Logan rasped, slowly staggering towards the merc, hands desperately grabbing at Wade’s arms. The merc tries to speak, but gets interrupted.

“I can be useful Wade, you need help taking hits? Is it something physical you want with me? You’re always joking about my abs and “tits” and shit, you want that?” Logan pleads in an increasingly maniacal tone. Wade, horrified at Logan’s statement interrupts.

“No what- what are you taking about? I’m not forcing you to move out, Logan, it was just a suggestion!”

Logan still can’t bring himself to face Wade, suddenly ashamed at his words. He attempts to turn and leave, but is stopped by Wade as the merc continues.

“Pookie look at me, yes I know difficult task, but I need you to know I’m being serious when I say you don’t owe me anything.” Wade says.

“I don’t know what perception you have of me, but I would never coerce you to do something that you weren’t into because you felt the need to repay me for god knows what reasons. Consent is mandatory AND very sexy. In fact, I’m very happy to have you living with me, I just asked to make sure YOU wanted to live with ME.”

Wade rambles on while reassuring Logan, but at this point poor wolvie is overwhelmed with the idea that Wade actually wants him here? It’s a novel concept that someone would want Logan just for being Logan. It was never about who he was as a person, only the role he could fill. Bad guy, good guy, the Wolverine, a weapon, all his life he tried to live up to labels and expectations, thrown away if he didn’t meet them. He always needed to impress, to be useful to get people to stay.

Tears gently rolled down his face as Wade brushed them away softly, guiding the two to bed. “Shhh it’s alright honey badger, we can talk more about this in the morning. You’re tired, let’s get you to bed first” the merc whispers as he walks.

The two eventually go to bed, Logan falling asleep tucked against Wade while listening to his heartbeat Both had their arms wrapped tight around each other, Logan finally feeling safe in someone’s embrace for once.

(They then had a healthy conversation about stuff and yeah this post is getting too long and the author doesn’t want to write more dialogue rn 👍)