#ordonian rants

[ordonianhero]

Story time

Cw: mention of harassment

When I was in high school around early 2000s I joined “gay straight alliance”. During that time I studied the numbers of those apart of the lgbtq+ were discriminated against in schools when identifying as lgbtq+ and how schools felt with that. It grabbed the attention to our local news paper asking me to make a commentary piece in it. Mind you I was a junior in high school.

I wrote the piece with facts and proof how it was still on going. How schools need to change their policy on “S.H.” To included those apart of the lgbtq+ community. We brought a visual with desks that showed what daily life was like for those who are lgbtq and stories of people murdered based on their sexual and gender identity.

That summer school changed their policy, adding sexuality and identity of lgbtq+ being included based on things I said and did. In my senior year. I was saved by said policy. And here is how. I was in a class where I helped with disabled teens (since I couldn’t do p.e. For my health) there was a student who I friended and who begin reporting false reports I was making advanced on her. This was only when she found out I was a trans. Every day I was pulled out of class for false reports.

On Halloween i was nearly kicked from school till my parents slept in and explained what was going on since apparently nobody else would listen to me. I was was having panic attacks over this. Like imagine this. You’re in a class and being pulled out of it by a police officer to tell you to quit making advances on someone who you weren’t making advances towards. Yeah. That!

The school then finally recognized I was the true victim. Sadly their way of dealing with it was locking me in a class room for my safety I stead of dealing with the student making the false reports. My friends (bless them) took me side and went after the person and called them out on their behavior once they knew what happened.

The person left our school. This person used their religious belief to S.H. Me and make false reports because they thought they could get away with it. So…….

With all that going on in the Linked universe with this server. And then publicly posting (we got recites idiots) of their true behavior and such. Reminds me of this all over again. So no! I Will not let this happen again. NO WHERE IN YOUR RELIGION GIVES YOU THE RIGHT TO TARGET US IN THIS FANDOM. YOUR VIEW IS FAKE NEWS! (Also don’t quote the Bible, cause Bible was written like a fanfiction by people who had no connection to god/goddesses.)

So this my personal experience on this issue. Do I hate religion. No. I think religion is good in helping people better themselves in a spiritual side. However nowhere does religion excuse the amount of judgment a person makes. God/Goddesses love you no matter who you are. If your lgbtq+ they love you. If you believe differently (region wise) they love you. Racially different, you were loved.

Along the line of schools showing porn to children, people who have been found to be false. In elementary all we learned in separate gender classes about what to expect from our body changes. Middle school to high school was about being smart and using protection and about sexual transmitted disease. Nothing bout sexuality. Which was hardly touched on. Nothing pornagraphic! Doubt they are doing that even now! Your proof and reports are in fake reports. So hi. We are calling you out because you’re the reason majority of those who identify as lgbtq+ and such are the target of misinformation and people with dangerous ideology. Ones where many may ender their life due to your comments. To lot worst. So don’t “@“ me. I won’t respond, but will expose you, so people know who not to trust.

I am here to protect my fellow people. You didn’t need to say what you said, because now we all know in a app and fandom surrounded by people of all walks of life. Who we know not to trust. Don’t want to make it politics, well fuck. That was on you when you publicly announced the server. “Don’t like pride on a political commercial” guess what. Many died to make pride to happen. That ain’t political or commercial. That was wanting equality rights. To be allowed to love who they love and not be thrown in jail over it. Gay marriage, I can’t tell you how sad it is that people are so stuck thinking gay marriage ruins those who are straight. It harms no one. You’re the one worrying how it impacts you.

Gender affirming surgery is necessary. I know each state delt with that differently and yes a small percentage detransition. However Majora is medically necessary. Many doctors refuse to do surgery on those who are of teenage, unless parental okay and a clinical counselor signs off it is needed so this person gets ontop of hormone therapy. You facts are incorrect and done by people who have been found incredible.

So go on, play like we don’t know or seen your true shit. Your facts are false. Your language is harmful and we ain’t throwing an tantrum. We are calling you out. Your views are false views based of fake documents. And if your religion truely telling you to discriminated a whole community of folks based of how they are. That ain’t a religion.

Any ways. Enjoy your life. Must be hard to spend so much you life hating people based on fake shit.

[trying-to-thrive]

Just got even more mad about urushiol oil being in existence, that's funny

[monstrous-fusion]

Rancher / Twilight Princess / he/she / 21 years

Though he is but a simple farmhand from Ordon, Rancher is exceptionally brave, often going out of his way to help those in need. Possessing a heart of gold and dogged loyalty to his greatest good, Rancher is the ideal hero. The only thing marring her perfect image is a shadowy form and a regret that boiled his blood.

A huge thanks to @wildsage00 for all the help with her design! I really appreciated your guidance and advice with this one <3 she looks wonderful

Some fun facts about her under the cut!

This MIGHT just shock you, but he loves Ordonian Goats. Sometimes she wishes she could have been turned into a goat rather than a wolf--they're more friendly, but still powerful and not to be trifled with. It still hurts him that the goats hate her wolf form so much.

Bugs!!!! Every once and awhile, she'll go out to the city and help Agitha with her bug preservation, and he ended up learning a lot about them! His favourite sub family of bugs is Holoptilinae (a subfamily of Reduviinae, or Assassin bugs) because of their feathery little legs! Also, he WILL give you a huge rant about how Daddy Long Leg ""spiders"" aren't actually spiders (Minish would agree).

Rancher is their best horse rider in the group and physically the strongest next to Engie (guess a lot of chucking coal into a furnace makes you pretty physically strong). She can (and will) lift a fully grown Ordonian goat if she has to.

[science-lings]

LU Voice HCs but Only Stupid Opinions

Sky- Markiplier, deep beautiful voice syndrome. Generally has a very smooth voice that makes the ladies (and not ladies) swoon. But he has the capacity for great rage. He can fuckin scream dude. He’s a little scary when he’s angry. He also has a wonderful laugh. 

Hyrule- Jacksepticeye (not all of these are youtubers I promise), I just think that giving the most seemingly soft spoken Link Sean’s voice is very funny. He has a strong Irish accent and has the ability to be very loud when he wants to. I’m pretty sure there’s a thing in one of the versions of his games where you can yell in the mic and kill enemies and if anyone could do that it would be Mr. Septiceye. Also I think Hyrule should be allowed to swear. 

Four- Tom Holland (but with his nerdy american accent, except Vio, he’s fucking British), Also Blue sounds like he’s a native New Yorker. Generally pretty shy and soft spoken but he kind of just sounds like he knows things. You can just hear his voice and know that he’s a little nerd boy. He sounds smart. But he also sounds stupid. I don’t care if it doesn’t make sense. 

Legend- Brian David Gilbert, he sometimes sounds like he’s losing his mind. He can talk really fast and he doesn’t sound nearly as mean as he wants to. Has a really nice singing voice that no one expects. Manages to sound very smart when spewing complete bullshit. Goes on rants and dramatic monologues. Can cry on command. Intellectual but in the way that sounds like he’s halfway to going insane. 

Warriors- Flynn Rider, he always sounds like he flirting, peak swave fuckboy disease. I know in reality he sounds like the ultimate anime boy but I just think it would be funny if his voice was that of a snarky pick-up artist. Also he sounds unquestionably bisexual.  

Time- Henry Cavill (But specifically using his Geralt voice), he’s deep and gruff and dadly. he does a surprising amount of grumbling. but his voice is usually very soft. Has been known to say ‘fuck’ with a lot of feeling under his breath whenever there are problems. 

Twilight- Markiplier (But this time doing his absolutely terrible cowboy voice/ southern accent. It’s so bad), again, beautiful deep voice but his accent is so bad that it sounds like he’s faking it. He’s not. That’s just what every Ordonian sounds like. Stop bullying him. 

Wind- the ‘WHEN WILL YOU LEARN THAT YOUR ACTIONS HAVE CONSEQUENCES’ meme kid. SonicFan06 or something like that. He has the ability to screech. He also has terminal pre-teen voice that constantly cracks. Will scream just to annoy people. (im so sorry i don’t know many famous children, maybe like Finn Wolfhard from early stranger things seasons where he’s trying so hard to be an edgy teenager but he is literally a baby. that has Wind vibes) 

Wild- Karen Gillian, idk man I have very strong opinions on what his voice sounds like. I like to think of him having a soft scottish accent that used to be super strong before he spent so much time at the castle with all the posh people. I also really think he has the vibe of someone with a really androgynous voice. Like he doesn't have to disguise his voice in Gerudo Town. Also because I project as much gender envy into this little twink as I can. He gains power whenever people struggle to fit him into a gender binary, and that includes his voice. 

[navii-blaze]

The Desert's Torture

     This is not connected to any of my other stuff besides the fact that it is a Linked Universe AU fanfic. All rights and credit goes to the creator and Nintendo. Hope ya'll like it. Btw, I realized that since it is hard to tell which hero is which I made a cheat chart to reference. As you may tell, I took some inspiration from some of the other fanfic authors for this AU.

Hero of Warriors- War, Captain

Hero of the Sky- Sky, Hylia’s hero

Hero of Legend- Veteran, hero of the golden goddesses, hero of oracles

Hero of Hyrule- Ace, traveler

Hero of Time- Time, pops, old man

Hero of the Wild- Wild, cook, amnesic

Hero of the Four Sword/Minish- Four

Hero of Twilight- pup

     The hot sun blared on the heros' backs as they trudged through the wasteland of the Gerudo. They left at dawn, hoping to get to the city before the heat set in heavily, but they misjudged the nature of the foreign desert. Each one of them had shed off their armor and heavy layers, even the most prideful hero took off his prized scarf. The heat sapped their energy, making each sand dune seem like a mountain to walk over. 

 "You know, I've been in some pretty rough environments, heck I've been inside Death Mountain of all places. But nothing like this." The hero of twilight groaned as the sand rubbed between his feet and sandals. The desert back in his time had certainly never been this hot, so hot that he had forced himself to wear his standard Ordonian garbs, minus the shirt part. It would be a lie if he said that he was comfortable with showing off so much skin. The only times when he exposes himself like now was when he participated in wrestling matches. When he changed into his home garbs he couldn't help but notice a couple envious glances towards him, particularly from Ace and Veteran. But he supposed that he couldn't dismiss their jealousy if he couldn't dismiss his own. 

His eyes drifted over to to the youngest of the group, who was for some bizarre reason, full of energy and hadn't broken a sweat yet. Yet as he envied his ability to keep moving, he couldn't help but feel sorry for the hero of the Four Sword. With every question about the kingdom of Hyrule Wind asked him, it seemed like the smaller hero had a harder time walking. Suddenly Ace's voice interrupted his thoughts. 

"Hey look! An oasis!" What was once an exhausted and sweaty caravan of swordsmen turned into an alert and energetic group of young males half running, half still sluggishly walking towards the palm trees on the horizon. Nearly thirty minutes passed before they finally reached the new found paradise. It was abandoned, only a few boxes and barrels showed evidence of any past activity.  After scouting the area, the heroes set down their bags and weapons, with any sense of caution quickly disappearing. Taking the absence of other people as a blessing, they quickly stripped down to their under garments and dove into the cool spring for relief. Groans and sighs of relief filled the still air, occasionally interrupted by a playful splash or two. 

The hero of twilight nearly submerged himself all the way into the water, desperate to get the desert heat off of him.  He shot a glance at his descendant who was listening to the most prideful hero talk of his conquests and battles. Knowing that the captain’s rants tended to go on for a while, he decided against joining the conversation and moved next to his mentor, who draped his arm over Twilight’s shoulders.

“How long do you think we’ll stay here pops?” the hero of twilight felt exposed in such an open area, but the coolness of the spring kept him confined to the paradise in the vast desert. 

The elder shifted into a more comfortable position, “Beats me pup, I think we’ll settle for the night, it’s already past midday, and there’s no telling when our next stop will be.” the heroes spent the next hour basking in the coolness of the spring, no monsters in sight except for a lizalfos camping out a couple hundred yards away.  

They set up camp rather quickly, Time’s and Wild’s warnings of the night chill going through the heads of the heroes that were inexperienced with the extremes of the wasteland.  By the time the sun dipped on the horizon, the oasis was decked out by multiple sleeping cots surrounding a fire made from the wood of a palm tree Wild cut down, and a spark of ever-burning fire magic from a spell Hyrule cast.  

For the rest of the evening and a hour into nightfall, the heroes talked among themselves, mostly concerning how much desert was left to travel.  The hero of Twilight and the youngest of them all stood on opposite sides of the camp keeping watch.  Twilight’s eyes scanned over the endless dunes of sand, the cold breeze blowing bits of sand on his face.  When suddenly movement caught his eye from far off.  He walked over to where the abandoned crates where and climbed on top of one.  The hero took out his hawkeye mask and equipped it, adjusting the lenses until he saw what he had been looking for.  It was the lizalfos from earlier, they had paid no mind to them then, except for keeping an extra eye out for any change in the reptiles’ behaviors.  But now he saw them changing into armor and gathering weapons, moving fast and with intention.  When he shifted his gaze over a couple meters he realized what those intentions were.  Two lizalfos were approaching the oasis, fast and stealthy with their weapons out. 

He took the mask off, cursing at himself for not noticing them sooner, Twilight grabbed the nearest sword and shield and started banging the sword against the metal.  Upon hearing the alarm for intruders, the heroes snapped awake, grabbing their swords and equipment.  Wind ran over to the hero of twilight, his eyes frantically scanning the area.

“What’s happening? Are we under attack?” The older hero nodded and pointed towards the direction of the incoming monsters.

“The lizalfos camp from earlier is preparing for battle, they have sent two scouts this way for whatever reason.  Tell the others the situation and have three archers be ready to draw their bows.” Wind nodded and sprinted back to the other and explained to a very confused hero of time what was going on.  Meanwhile Twilight took out his bow and crouched behind the crates, he looked over his shoulder and saw that Time had picked Wild, Sky, and Wind to take up their bows and find a secluded spot.  The others were sorted out hastily into either a defense or offense position.

An enemy horn made Twilight turn back to where the lizalfos were supposed to appear.  The two spotted from earlier had disappeared behind the dunes, causing the twilight hero is worry.  His worries were soon lessened when his mentor rushed to his side, crouched down with his hand ready to pull out his unbreakable clay-more. 

“I saw the lizalfos just before they disappeared, keep your bow ready pup.” Twilight nodded, and risked yet another glance at his comrades.  To his right stood the most polished of the group, sword out while Ace hid behind a palm tree with an arrow nocked.  Next to the fire stood the hero of the Four Sword alongside with the hero of oracles, both armed with spears.  The youngest hero covered his left, Sky ready at the bow not too far away.  Realizing something was missing, Twilight frantically scanned the area, almost dropping his guard.  A movement from the top of one of the trees drew his attention, and eased his growing panic.  His protege was perched on the top of a tree, how the amnesic managed to climb so fast was unknown to him but that wasn’t of importance right now.  Each one of their gazes focused on where the enemy was said to be approaching.  

“One spotted at two o’ clock,” Twilight snapped back to position from Time’s warning and nocked his bow to his right, still hidden by the crates.  The desert wind blew softly across his face, causing a shiver to run down his spine.  But the wind carried another sensation, a stench of a reptilian odor, coming from his left rather than his right.  It was nearly too late when he recognized the trap, springing out of his position Twilight fired an arrow next to an unsuspecting hero of Hylia, finding its mark in the neck of a lizolfos.  

Stumbling away from the monster’s corpse, Sky had a mortified look as he contemplated what would have happened if Twilight hadn’t seen the reptilian beast at the last second.  Snapping out of his shock, the first hero readied his bow again and now with a fierce look in his eyes, scan for any signs of movement.  As the first wave appeared itself, he started to let loose on the incoming lizalfos.

Twilight was starting to feel overwhelmed by the sudden appearance of monsters, the fact that he was about to run out of arrows didn’t help.  A lizalfos decked out in more armor than the rest jumped out from behind a dune and charged full speed at the camp.  Reaching for his quiver, panic briefly overtook Twilight when he didn’t feel any more arrows.  Cursing beneath his breath, he threw down his bow and unsheathed the sword Rusl had given to him after his quest to save Hyrule.  The hero of twilight leaped over the crates with his sword and shield and was almost brought to his knees by the sheer amount of force the lizalfos brought down on him with its mace.  

He started to feel the effects of his arm and shield taking the burden of the monster’s weight, his muscles straining and cramping from the pressure.  The weight was suddenly lifted as Time brought his sword down on the beast’s head, Twilight cringed as the sound of a splitting skull echoed through his ears.  

The two warriors stood back from the monster, breathless as they looked around at their comrades.  Everyone seemed to be holding their positions alright, Ace had been forced to abandon his bow like Twilight did and now stood side-by-side with Captain.  The hero of oracles had a limp in his leg, and had to fall back a little and use his bow.  

It seemed like only a couple of minutes before all of the lizalfos in the area were finished off by either arrow or blade.  Once Wild gave the sign that the cost was clear from the top of a tree, they huddled near the fire.  As soon as injuries were wrapped and potions handed out, their leader quickly laid out a hastily made map of the oasis.

“Alright soldiers listen up,” Time’s voice quickly caught the attention of the heroes, even Wild’s attention as he inspected Legend’s bruised leg.  “Like nearly every battle before where we have fought together, the next part of this battle needs to be won with precision and caution.  We don’t need to risk anymore injuries tonight.” his hand absently gestured to Legend, whose face was hidden by his large auburn bangs.  Time’s voice distracted Wild, causing the veteran hero to grimace as Wild accidentally tightened his bandages too much.  

While the two silently bickered over Legend’s leg, Twilight paid note to his mentor as he created a battle strategy on the hand-made map.  Or, at least tried to pay attention.  He had been up for quite a while now, back when he was standing watch, he only had fifteen minutes left of patrolling before he could wake someone else up to take his place.  It didn’t help when the breeze stopped blowing, making the atmosphere cool and comfortable when he stood next to the fire.

Holding a yawn back, Twilight just barely made out Time’s instructions before they dispersed into new positions.  Twilight made his way over to Time, a question on his mind that he had been meaning to ask.  But just as he approached his mentor, a high pitched whistle from Wild sounded for the second incoming wave.  Looks like his question would have to wait.  

I kid you not at multiple times while writing this I wrote the same fricken sentence over and over again and it took me like 10 minutes just to proof read it all so that there wouldn’t be an extra sentence in there.  Anyways, school sucks, takes up too much of my time, now I’m debating if I actually want that botany degree or if I can start practicing on a guitar in hopes of becoming a street musician with a day job at Taco Bell.  Life be like that sometimes...  Well, hope you guys liked it, please leave some form of feedback, comments on how I can improve is extremely appreciated. Thx for reading, peace out.

[ordonianhero]

I am sorry, i ate so many waffle friends, I hate this world and done with whatever new thing is being thrown at me.