#perfect pause duration with ''...tom''

[unproduciblesmackdown]

cinematicmas extravagarallels: me losing it every time over will's sprinkled in vibrato on "here we go" / "but really i'd better scurry"

[jahayla-writes]

The Master Part 1

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Ringing Introductions

Y/n polished of the engraved ring, a prop for the lead of the movie she was working on. She was in Barcelona as part of the Uncharted prop department. And as such, she was overseeing the ring that Tom Holland would be wearing on a necklace chain for the entire duration of the movie. As she inspected the item, she saw her friend and co-worker Olivia approach.

“God, can I be the one to hand that to him?” Olivia asked rhetorically, her voice bubbly.

“What? The ring?” Y/n clarified, lifting up said item. When Olivia nodded, y/n raised an eyebrow and turned to her friend. “You want to give it to Tom? Why?” She questioned cluelessly.

Olivia scoffed lightly at y/n’s question. “He’s so unbelievably hot and,” she began, pausing as she leaned closer to y/n. “I bet he’s really good with his hands,” she winked with a smirk. “I wanna see them up close to be sure,” she concluded.

Y/n mentally rolled her eyes but maintained her professionalism and simply shook her head. There was no doubt that the lead, Tom, was really good looking. Not to mention fit. After all, y/n had helped with some of the costuming pieces since her work with the props sometimes went hand in hand. But, y/n didn’t care for the way Olivia was seemingly implying that was all there was to him. Y/n may not know Tom, but Olivia was reducing their coworker to a sex object and that didn’t sit well with y/n. She politely told Olivia that she couldn’t be the one to give it to Tom. While it was mostly for Tom’s sake, as y/n figured no one would want someone treating them like that, much less at work, she explained her decision to Olivia with some of the lesser reasons. She shyly told Olivia that what she was suggesting wasn’t appropriate but still further justified her choice to give Tom the ring herself by explaining that she needed to make sure it fit just right. It was true technically, as the director wanted it to hang a certain length down Tom’s chest and she isn’t sure if she got it right or not by sight guessing.

Olivia clearly wasn’t pleased, but didn’t say anything more in argument about the matter. Instead, she watched as y/n excused herself and made her way over to where Tom and his personal assistant were.

Y/n was studying the ring in her hands as she approached Tom. The cast was about to film one of the first scenes in the movie but hadn’t started yet, so it was the perfect time to give him the prop. As she analyzed the engravings she’d made on the metal, she felt her the toes of her shoes snag on something under her feet. Before she could do anything to stop her from completely tripping, her body began to fall toward. She closed her eyes as she prepared for her face to slam into the ground. Only, something, or someone, stopped her.

Y/n nervously opened her eyes and saw someone’s muscular arm had caught her and stopped her fall. She reluctantly traced the arm back until she could see who had saved her. She felt her face heat up and her eyes enlarged as they met Tom’s worried gaze. “I… thank you Mr. Holland,” she whispered shyly as she allowed him to help her stand up right again. “I’m sorry, I’m a major klutz,” she admitted with a bashful expression.

Tom shook his head and chuckled lightly. “It’s alright darling, but you don’t have to call me that,” he promised. Upon seeing the woman was still embarrassed, he gave her a lopsided smile. “Besides, I’m a klutz too at times,” he added sweetly.

Y/n bit her lip but smiled at Tom appreciatively. She nodded silently and nervously looked around his face, uncertain what to say or do now that she’d made a fool of herself. And not just in front of most of the crew, but also directly in front of the lead actor on the set. Of course she had. She laughed timidly as she glanced down at her feet, not realizing her action made her coworker smile at her.

“So, by the way, I’m,-“ Tom began, ready to introduce himself to his undeniably beautiful coworker. Only, he was cut off when their director, Ruben Fleischer, called for the set to be quiet. Tom knew this meant they were about to begin the next scene, one he had been excited to start. Only, now it made him a bit frustrated as he’d hoped to at least have gotten the name of his shy coworker before going back to shooting. Unfortunately, the woman didn’t seem to pick up on what he’d been trying to do before Ruben cut him off. As, instead of introducing herself, she simply took hold of Tom’s left hand with her slightly-shaking hands and gently set something inside of it before whispering another shy apology and rushing backstage. Tom frowned slightly but looked down at the item in his hand and smiled. Whatever her name was, she’d done an excellent job at designing the prop ring to the exact details he knew the one his character owned should have on it. He couldn’t help but let his eyes wander in the direction she’d ran off as he made his way back to the taped mark on the floor- where he was expected to stand to start the next scene.

“Soph,” y/n groaned, looking away from her coworker and friend Sophia Ali, who was one of the leads for the Uncharted movie. “It was so embarrassing,” she huffed.

Olivia simply continued to laugh while Sophia shook her head lightheartedly. Sophia moved closer to y/n and rubbed her back. “I mean, it’s not a big deal girly,” she promised sweetly. “That is, unless you have a crush on him,” she teased, but her eyes held an unspoken inquisitive gleam.

“I barely know him,” y/n laughed as she shook her head at her friend’s teasing remark. “But that’s precisely the problem”.

“You having a crush on him?” Olivia asked, suddenly participating in the conversation.

Y/n gave her friend an annoyed glance, not knowing that Olivia was genuine in her wonderment over the idea of y/n liking Tom. “I just said I don’t even know him, so no,” she pointed out, adding a little laugh to the end of her statement to soften the words so it didn’t come out harsh. “But, he’s a coworker that I’ll have to interact with a lot over the next several months, and I just face-planted in front of him,” she reminded her friends begrudgingly.

Sophia giggled quietly and pulled y/n to her for a side hug. “It’ll be fine, he seems nice enough,” she encouraged, “I’m sure he’ll forget it even happened soon enough!”

Y/n hummed hopefully and nodded. Only she followed Sophia’s eyes and found Tom looking over their way. She swallowed thickly and quickly turned her head back to the table behind her and the girls. “Anyways,” she mumbled, making Sophia and Olivia both laugh.

Tom noticed how close the woman from earlier seemed to be with his costar Sophia Ali. But, he knew he wasn’t close enough to this particular costar yet. At least not enough for it to be normal to ask what her friend’s name was and not make him look like a self absorbed actor who didn’t know the names of the crew on the set he was on. To be fair, he’d only been here maybe a full two days so far. But still, he didn’t want anyone thinking he didn’t care to get to know the crew enough to know their names. So, even when the scene with him and Sophia came to an end, he didn’t ask for her to tell him the name of the prop woman.

Y/n smiled and hugged Tati supportively. She and her friend, Tati Gabrielle, had met on the set of a previous production they’d both been working on. But this was Tati’s first big movie production she’d been cast for and she was nervous. Y/n had been reassuring her over the last few weeks that she was going to do an amazing job on set. But today she admitted she was extra nervous because she was starting to work with Mark Wahlburg and Tom; both big names in the acting industry. Yet, y/n had watched Tati’s latest scene and thought it went flawlessly. “I told you that you’d be great!” She cheered, winking at Tati as they pulled apart. “Now, go, you are needed back over there,” she said as she nudged her friend back to where Tom was waiting for the director to signal for the next scene to start.

Despite seeing their friendly encounter, Tom didn’t ask Tati Gabrielle about the woman he’d met caught earlier. Nevertheless, he repeatedly found himself catching glimpses of the woman as she ran around the set with various props. He knew he’d clearly taken an interest in her and wanted to know more about her. But, Tom still couldn’t figure out who to ask about her without seeming stuck up or starting rumors that he was crushing on his coworker.

“Seriously? That’s horrible Rach,” y/n laughed lightly. Her friend, Rachel had told her an embarrassing story about the last celebrity she did the makeup for. This time around she was Tom’s makeup artist, but it had been awhile since the girls had seen each other. As such, they had a lot of funny stories to catch up on.

“It really was, but that’s just the tip of the iceberg,” Rachel hummed as she took a sip of her water bottle.

Before y/n could try to pry her for more details, there was a knock on the door. The wooden door swung open from the force since it had been slightly cracked open already. She and Rachel turned their heads simultaneously to see who was behind it. She smiled shyly as Harry waved at them as he sauntered in. They’d met earlier as it turned out Harry was not just Tom’s brother but also his personal assistant, and therefore he had been getting things ready for Tom before the star even got to set/town.

“‘ello loves, y/n, good to see you,” Harry greeted with a friendly nod and smile. He turned to his brother’s makeup artist. “Rachel, do you mind?” Harry questioned vaguely as he nodded his head backwards towards the door behind him.

Rachel laughed and shook her head. “Needing another touch-up?” She asked rhetorically, already grabbing her tools.

Harry chuckled and nodded affirmatively. “Shouldn’t be too much, but the water from the scene messed it up some,” he explained, reciting what one of the producers commented.

“Alright, let’s do it,” Rachel nodded, throwing her shoulder bag strap over her head. “Y/n, coming?” She offered, holding her hand out to help y/n up from the blue bean bag chair she’d been sitting on.

Y/n watched silently from the side of the set as Rachel worked on touching up Tom’s makeup. She was trying to watch Rachel work, but found it hard not to stare at Tom as he stood completely still like a statue as Rachel’s brushes danced over his chiseled features.

“You all done for the day?” Harry asked, making small talk with y/n as he watched Rachel fix his brother’s makeup.

Y/n shook her head. “Nope, just taking an early lunch cause Olivia wanted to switch hers to my usual time,” she explained with a shrug.

Harry hummed softly as he thought to himself. “Let me guess, you usually have lunch around one, yeah?” He wondered, glancing over at y/n.

Y/n faltered and spun to Harry with a frazzled expression. “Yes…,” she trailed off hesitantly, “why?”

Harry laughed and shook his head. “So does my brother,” he explained.

Y/n nodded slowly, acknowledging the new information but not understanding why Harry mentioned it. “Okay…, cool,” she said, although her tone made the last word come out as a question.

Harry laughed more and shook his head. “I’m guessing Olivia knew that and that’s why she switched with you,” he explained, smirking at y/n’s innocent confusion. It can be hard to find genuine people on sets like this. People who aren’t always looking for a way to get ahead or trying to get close to the star(s). Harry had a sense that y/n was one of those rare people. This oversight was only one small example he’d noticed in support of this thesis.

Tom rested his sock-clad feet on the armrest of the sofa as his brother Harry closed the trailer door behind them.

“Gonna take up the whole couch?” Harry scoffed with a playful eye roll as he made his way to the sink. He got down a mug and filled it with some cold tap water.

“There’s a whole other one, mate,” Tom laughed, closing his eyes as he laid his head backwards until it hit the other armrest. He hummed quietly to himself as he let his body melt into the cushions under him. He had maybe an hour to rest before he’d be needed back on set and he would be making the most of it.

As Harry sat down on the sofa opposite Tom, he tossed the extra bag of crisps he’d grabbed at his older brother. He smirked pridefully as the bag smacked against Tom’s face before dropping to his chest. He gave Tom an innocent smile when his brother glared at him. “You’re welcome,” he hummed.

Tom rolled his eyes and sat up so he could eat. “Actually,” he began, tearing open the bag. “I did need to talk to you about something”. “That girl you were talking to earlier,” he explained, deciding to continue when he saw Harry’s confusion. “The one who was with you when Rachel did my touch-up, and the one I saw you talking to over at her work station… by the props,” Tom mumbled.

Harry hummed and nodded as he ate more crisps. When Tom just stared at him silently, he realized his brother was actually done talking even though it didn’t seem like the end of a sentence. He swallowed the crumbs left in his mouth and set the bag down on the table next to him. “Y/n?”

Tom shrugged, “I honestly don’t know her name”. He bit his lip bashfully. “I felt bad about it. Y/n, you said? She’s in charge of the props department, yeah?”

Harry nodded, “she’s pretty cool”. “From what I know, she’s roughly around our age, is the propmaster like you said, and is pretty talented at it, umm,” he mumbled, trying to recall what else he knew about y/n. “Oh her favorite color is y/f/c; which is why so much of her personal stuff at her workstation odds that color,” he laughed, shaking his head as he remembered asking if there’d been a reason to all the y/f/c stationary.

Tom nodded his head as he absorbed the information his brother was offering. “Do you know if she is talking to anyone at the moment?” He asked quietly.

The Master Series Navigation

Tom Holland Masterlist

Peter Parker / Spider-Man Masterlist

All My Works / My Main Masterlist Navigation

[ugly-crying-over-bucky-barnes]

Promises Not Kept Part 21

Summary: Tommy Shelby made a promise to Jonah Ward while in the war. A promise he didn't keep. But it comes to haunt him when he tries to drown out his sorrows with a young woman.

Part 21: Everything seems alright if only just for a moment. 

  It was so easy to block out all the noise from the reception below. Once the door of the bedroom was closed, Tommy and Leah cast aside the outside world. In that space and in that moment, they were the only things remaining.

           Leah hastily worked at undoing the buttons of his suit. Her worries about keeping their guests waiting weren’t even in the back of her mind. She simply wanted to express her physical love for her husband.

           But Tommy set the pace. His fingers wrapped around her wrist to slow her down. Kissing her languidly, he murmured affectionate words against her lips. “So beautiful. So fucking beautiful.”

           “Please…” Leah gasped softly.

           He didn’t relent and kept his steady pace. Taking his time, making her wait. “Turn around.”

           She did so without hesitation. A soft sigh slipped off her lips when she felt his hands carefully undoing the ties of her dress. Every touch was lasting, burning through the fabric and just kissing her skin. Her toes curled when she felt Tommy’s breath on her bare shoulder. His lips grazing over the skin. He paused beside her ear. Playfully tugging at her lobe with his teeth before whispering to her.

           “You’re mine, Leah.” His deep voice had her reeling with lust. “No other man will ever touch you this way again. Only I’ll get to see you like this. Undone.”

           “Tom,” She whimpered. “Please don’t tease me any longer, please.”

           “Say it.”

           Leah knew what he wanted her to say. “I’m yours, Tommy. Forever.”

           In a flash, he grabbed her by the waist and turned her so she was facing him again. But this time, she stopped him before he could kiss her.

           “Now you say it.” She wrapped her arms around his neck. “Say it, Tommy.” His lips parted, small pants of want all he could muster. “Say it.”

           He groaned with desire and pulled her flush against him. “I’m yours.”

           “No other woman will touch you the way I touch you. Make you feel the way I do.” She ghosted her lips over his jaw causing a sharp jolt of electricity to travel down his spine.

           “Yes.” He responded. It was difficult to hide the breathiness in his voice. He was too far gone to even attempt it.

           “Then take what’s yours.”

           Tommy didn’t need to be asked twice. He picked her up and brought her to the bed they shared. He pressed into her, letting her feel his weight. One hand hitched her thigh up to his hip, simply rocking together as they kissed.

           Leah was dizzy with desire. For as many times as he’d kissed her before, somehow the feeling still overwhelmed her.

           Tommy pushed himself up so he could get rid of the rest of his clothing. After he tugged his undershirt over his head, Leah saw the fresh bandages that still covered his side. Though it had been some time since his confrontation with Alfie on the beach, he was still healing.

           Wordlessly, his wife grazed her fingers down his abdomen. Just barely touching the edges of the white gauze. She traced back up, dipping between the planes of his ribs and flattening her hand over his chest. Her palm resting over his tattoo. “This is the end of this, Tom.” She whispered. “No more. I can’t take you getting hurt again.”

           He didn’t look away from her even if he couldn’t outright promise her he would never get harmed again. There were far too many people who would love to get a crack at him. “I’ve got more important things to focus on.” He responded, hoping it was enough to keep her satisfied on their wedding day.

           A soft smile spread across her face. “Like?” She prompted.

           “Like raising a family with you.” He lowered down, leaning on his elbows. “How’s that sound, aye?” His nose brushed over her jaw, his hair tickling her cheek.

           She squirmed with want and looped her arms around his neck. “That sounds nice.”

           He drew back to give her a devilish smirk. “Then I’ve got to get you pregnant, Mrs. Shelby.” He replied coyly.

           His wife giggled and chewed on her lip. “Cheeky boy.” She accused before attacking him with kisses.

~~~~~~

           As they attempted to reassume their put-together look of wedded bliss, Leah and Tommy lingered in the bedroom.

           “So I was thinking about things we could do while you’re taking a break.” She said from her spot at the vanity, trying to fix her hair as best she could.

           Tommy was sat on the bed putting on his cufflinks and arm garter. “Yeah, any ideas?”

           “Well, I know how much Charlie would love to take the horses out. Find somewhere to picnic. I think you ought to take him out riding at least every other day. It would make him so happy.”

           “Yeah, alright, I will.” He nodded in agreement. Spending time with the horses and his son sounded relaxing enough.

           “And of course you can go hunting. Maybe even try to golf? Sort of posh but…” She laughed softly and shrugged. “You owe it to yourself to relax.”

           The idea made Tommy absolutely sick to his stomach. But he faked a complacent look as he stood up. “Be nice to try new things.” Of course, he wanted to try new things. Wanted to try his hand in politics. Wanted to show those rich bastards that a workingman could speak just as eloquently as they could. Wanted to see changes he pushed for put into action.

           But he wasn’t meant to be doing anything while on his holiday.

           Tommy stood behind Leah at the vanity, resting his hands on her shoulders. She glanced up at him in the mirror. “I can’t tell you how happy I am right now.” She touched his hand. “Not only being married but…but being able to see you relax for the first time well…ever.”

           The smile on his face was detached. Still, he bent down to kiss her cheek. “Take your time getting ready, I’ll stall for you.” He murmured and went to leave the bedroom. He was surely going to be sick if he had to keep talking about the holiday he was dreading.

~~~~~~~~~

           And things were okay for about a month. Tommy and Leah bickered a little bit about the duration of his holiday. Eventually, she convinced him to wait out the summer. Three months of doing nothing but relaxing. No work. No business. No politics. Nothing.

           Tommy was grateful for the memories he’d made in that first month. Charlie and Leah kept him busy enough that he didn’t feel like he was sitting around and twiddling his thumbs.

           Together they took long rides out into the pastures. Charlie’s little pony tied up alongside Tommy’s gelding. Sometimes they went out to the stream that fed into a crystal clear pond or up to the glens to find the perfect meadow.

           On shorter trips, they took Cyril along who liked to romp around the tall grass, chasing butterflies and rabbits in the thicket.

           On a particularly sunny afternoon, the three, plus Cyril, went out to the pond. It was a warm day so they decided to take Charlie so he could swim. For a brief moment, Tommy was serene.

           He lounged in the grass by the pond, legs outstretched, resting on his elbows. Cyril was sat near him, the mastiff paying close attention to Leah and Charlie. Leah had hitched up her skirt so she could wade into the water with Charlie who was swimming around like a little frog. He kept chirping at her to watch as he practiced ducking his head underwater. Leah praising the little guppy every time he resurfaced with a triumphant grin.

           The hazy summer day felt like a romantic dream. The opening of a novel or a play. When everything was just perfect and airy. The mesmerizing blues and greens of the lush forest sparkling with mystique. The sun reflecting off the water and shining a façade. The laughter of his son and wife sounded too melodious. They appeared to glow in the summer shine.

           Something in Tommy’s gut twitched. His forehead creased and he looked down at his hand resting in the dewy grass. It was shaking.

~~~~~~~~~

          “Frances?” Leah called into the other room.

           “Yes, Mrs. Shelby?” The maid entered the doorway.

           “Is Tommy still out fishing?” She checked the clock a second time. Her husband had been due to be home half an hour ago. He’d promised that they would all have lunch together on the lawn. When he left, he seemed to be in a daze but Leah assumed he would keep his promise and arrive home at the time they agreed on.

           “No, Mrs. Shelby. I haven’t seen him arrive home. Should I ask one of the stable boys to go and fetch him?” Frances asked politely.

           “No need.” Leah stood and set aside the letter she was writing. “I’ll go get some fresh air, it’s not too long of a walk.”

           “It’s a bit chilly out, let me fetch your coat.”

           “Oh,” Leah stopped her before she left. “fetch one of Tommy’s riding coats, I don’t want to get any of mine dirty. It’s awfully damp out there.”

           “Yes, ma’am.”

~~~~~~~~

           The walk to the pond took Leah around the back of Arrow House’s property and into the trails. She often took walks on them with Charlie, so she was familiar with the route. Although it wasn’t raining out, there was a heavy damp feeling to the air. The sun had barely made an appearance all day but Tommy still insisted on going out. After all, he was meant to be relaxing.

           But Leah could tell he was on edge. Strangely, even more so than when they were all under threat from Luca Changretta. It obviously seemed backward, but Polly mentioned the possibility of a change in Tommy’s demeanor. So Leah did her best to watch for the signs and act accordingly. He was entering his third month of holiday. But Leah couldn’t see how that would contribute to his uneasy behavior. How could anyone on a break get so anxious?

           Leah arrived at the pond and found Tommy still there. He noticed her coming but didn’t stand to greet her. His eyes stared out across the marshy pond, glazed over in deep thought.

           “Caught anything?” She asked softly.

           His head barely shook to the side to answer.

           Leah touched his shoulder and cleared her throat. There was tension radiating from him but she couldn’t understand why. He was simply sitting there, sitting by a peaceful pond, no enemies holding guns at his head. No danger in sight. “You’ve gone quiet the last few days. I’ve been worried.”

           The muscles in his jaw flexed but he still didn’t say anything.

           “Tommy, if there’s something bothering you…”

           He heard it before she did. And he heard it differently than she did.

           Planes.

           German planes.

           German bombers.

           Tommy reacted quickly. He grabbed Leah by the waist and dropped them both to the ground. Tucking his head under his arm, he braced for the impact.

           Leah hardly could react in time. “Tommy!” She pushed him off. “Tommy, they’re just hunters!”

           His ears stopped ringing when he heard another gunshot. Then another accompanied by the cheerful rejoicing of hunters and a bark of hounds. Slowly, he released his hold on Leah.

           She stood up in disbelief. “What the hell was that all about?” She demanded and took in her now mud-covered dress.

           Dazed, Tommy looked around and then up at her. He tilted onto his side and remained there for a second. “I heard planes.” He whispered.

           Leah looked up at the gray sky. “Well, I hardly think there are any planes flying that low.”

           He shook his head. “Bombers. I heard bombers.” The soldier stood up and held out his hand. “I’ve got the shakes now.” He’d known for weeks now. Couldn’t seem to get control of it even when he dug his fingernails into his palm or sat on his hands. Still, he had yet to tell Leah about it.

           His wife took his hand, resting it gently over her palm. Indeed, his hand was trembling violently beyond the man’s own control. “I’ll call the doctor.” Her irritated tone softened. “He’ll be able to see you on Monday. Maybe sooner if you need it.”

           “Don’t need a doctor.” He muttered and began to pack up his fishing gear.

           “I’ve heard about this, men who came back from the war suffer…”

           Tommy cut her off. “Don’t need a doctor.” He repeated in an icy tone and turned his back to her.

           Leah wrinkled her nose and crossed her arms over her chest. “So now you’re not going to listen to me at all?” She kept at him even when he gathered everything and started walking down the trail. “Even though I’m your wife and I’ve got every right to be worried about you?”

           His strides were much longer than hers and he didn’t slow his pace. Instead, she had to jog a few steps to keep up with him. “Leah, I’m not having this conversation. Forget about it.”

           “Forget about it? I’ve heard you up all hours of the night. You drink all day and all night. You’re always angry!” She snapped and slogged her way through the muddy path to catch up. “Charlie’s terrified you’ll be upset with him. He asks after you because he has no clue what’s gotten into you. Neither have I!”

           “Leah…” Tommy spoke her name in a warning tone but didn’t stop or slow down.

           “I’ve been dreaming about this for weeks, being able to relax and live without the worry of being killed. But now you’ve changed so much and you won’t even talk to me!” She wouldn’t relent. Too many times she’d sat back and stayed quiet. No more. Polly had given her more than enough wisdom on how to deal with a Shelby man at his worst.

           So she stopped in the middle of the path. “Thomas Michael Shelby you fucking stop and speak to me this instant!” She shouted.

           Tommy’s gait stuttered. It was so seldom that Leah raised her voice that it caught him off guard. But it didn’t relieve the building tension inside. So he kept walking and left her there.

~~~~~~~~

           It was a good thing Arrow House had so many rooms. Because Leah did not want to be in the same room as Tommy for at least the rest of the day. She was already deciding which room to sleep in because damned if she wanted to sleep in the same bed after what he’d done that morning.

           To spare Charlie, she did her best to conceal her anger. There was no need for the little boy to worry about both of his parents.

           But when Charlie asked where Tommy was, Leah instructed him to go find him. She stayed behind, tidying up his room so she wouldn’t have to see her husband.

           Not much time passed before Leah heard glass shattering. She got up and hurried into the hall, worried Charlie might’ve fallen and hurt himself. Instead, the little boy was rushing upstairs in tears.

           “Something’s wrong with daddy.” He whimpered.

           “Oh dear.” Leah mumbled under her breath and scooped Charlie up. “He’s alright, poppet, he’s just…sad.” She walked downstairs to find Mary so she could watch after the trembling child.

           Another loud noise came from the big room and when Leah stormed in, she was met with a disaster. Self-Destructive chaos that Tommy inflicted on himself. Several glasses had shattered on the ground. Some books and papers were knocked off the desk that Tommy was using to try and stay upright.

           No matter how much he drank, he did have a limit. And it appeared he had reached that limit about three glasses of whiskey ago.

           Not noticing Leah’s entrance, Tommy fell to his knees, gripping his hand. He let out a sob and hunched over. Such a powerful man with such an air of confidence had resulted in nothing but a drunken mess on the floor.

           It stabbed Leah right in the heart to see him in such a state. She didn’t think he was stupid or being silly. He was hurting.

           “Tommy, what’ve you done?” She sighed and picked her way over the broken glass to get to him. She knelt down and reached for his hand.

           “Lee…” He groaned and lurched forward a little.

           She let him lean on her shoulder and grabbed his injured hand. The broken glass had sliced open his palm and blood was beginning to trickle down his pale skin. “Goodness.”

           “Doesn’t hurt.” He slurred and slumped against her shoulder. “Can’t feel it. Can’t feel anything.”

           Leah pinched his arm making him yelp. “You feel that? That’s your bloody wife about to take care of you.” She said firmly. “Now sit still and wait. Don’t be touching anything else.”

           With some help, Tommy leaned against the back of his desk, legs outstretched and slouching like a petulant child. But he obeyed and stayed put while Leah grabbed a cloth to apply to the cut.

           The two of them sat surrounded by glass in the rich carpet. The sunlight was starting to fade and they were left in darkness soon enough.

           “M’sorry, Lee,” Tommy whispered after his wife grabbed a bit of gauze to wrap around his hand.

           “Don’t apologize. You can apologize to your son in the morning when you’re sober.” She replied tersely.

           He nodded sloppily and let his eyes slide shut, his head resting against his desk. “D’you still love me?”

           Leah scoffed. “That’s a ridiculous thing to ask, Thomas. And now’s not the time.”

           “Do you?” He didn’t seem to hear how peeved off she was.

           “Of course I still fucking love you.” She huffed. “If I didn’t love you then I wouldn’t be here putting your pieces back together, now would I? If I didn’t love you then I’d’ve taken your Bentley and disappeared. But I’m still here, aren’t I?”

           “Yeah.”

           Finishing with a knot in the gauze, she let Tommy’s hand go limp in his lap. “I don’t know what goes through that big brain of yours.” Her eyes were steady on him. “But I know that you’re hurting. And you can’t continue to live this way. Maybe I’m not the person who can help but I need you to know that I’m always here for you.”

           He grumbled in response and leaned forward, burying his face in the crook of her neck. She wrapped her arms around him and cradled him close.

           “It’s okay to be hurt, Tommy.” She soothed. “It’s okay to cry, it’s okay to have emotions. It’s okay not to be okay.”

           He shuddered against her, the substances in his blood causing him to lose the calm demeanor he was so proud to keep even in the worst of situations. Years of suppressing emotions had finally caught up to him. He was able to ignore them in the fast-paced life he kept. The life or death situations keeping the dark thoughts at bay.

           But after three months of living quietly, he couldn’t continue pushing them away. The things that haunted him, creeping over his shoulder and whispering in his ear, were now standing in front of him and screaming in his face. The men he watched die, the earth burying him, the song they all sang together, the sound of the enemies approaching. The men he had killed. Grace’s death. The moment he realized Leah and Charlie had been taken.

           Tommy’s fingers curled around Leah’s shoulders, gripping onto her. “It’s too much.”

           “Sh, let me take it then. Let me handle it. For a moment.” She whispered and pressed her lips to his hair. “Give all the thoughts, all the burdens to me.

~~~~~~~~~~~~

           After reassuring Charlie that everything was okay, Leah got Tommy to bed. She practically had to undress him; he was still thoroughly fucked up by the whiskey. But eventually she got him under the covers and he passed out seconds after hitting the pillow. Before long, he was snoring away.

           Leah stayed up reading, her hand gently rubbing Tommy’s back as he slept. She was emotionally exhausted after the day. It scared her seeing him so out of control. But there was little she could do to put him back together. That was up to him. All she could was be there for him and try to support him.

           With a sigh, she realized she wasn’t really absorbing any of the words on the page. Instead, she had been reading the same paragraph over and over again while her mind ran amok. She put the book aside and reached over to turn off the lamp. With the room swathed in darkness, she was left alone with her thoughts.

           She knew she was pregnant. Had known for almost a month. There were suspicions when her period was late and then Polly confirmed it for her. Leah was ecstatic to tell Tommy, but couldn’t bring herself to. Not when she noticed the decline in his health and behavior. What would another child do to him? Scare him? Anger him? Cause him more stress? Anxiety?

           He seemed so unstable; there was no way of knowing. And yet, Leah knew that she needed to tell him soon. Before she began to show and he accused her of lying.

           She also needed to go to the doctor. But Polly warned that the second she did, Tommy would know. He knew all the doctors in Birmingham and they all answered to him whether they liked it or not.

           Leah rolled over and wrapped her arms around Tommy, pressing her forehead against his back. “Tommy, I’m pregnant.” She whispered. She wanted to hear the words, test them out on her tongue. Even though she knew he was out cold, panic bubbled inside. What if he suddenly waked and demanded to know what she was talking about?

           She waited for a beat, but Tommy’s breathing didn’t stutter and he didn’t stir.

           “I’m pregnant.”

           Nothing. The whiskey had done its job of knocking him out for at least another few hours.

           Leah lifted her head and pressed a kiss to the bullet wound on his shoulder blade. “I’m pregnant with our child, Tom.” She whispered. Once she said it, she couldn’t stop. “Polly thinks it’s a girl. I want to go to the doctor and hear the heartbeat. Think about it. A sister for Charlie. A beautiful little girl with your eyes. She’ll be here soon. Soon enough.” She swallowed and rested her head back onto the pillow, her arms withdrawing from Tommy’s waist. “I’m pregnant.” She said aloud one more time before pressing a palm to her abdomen.

~~~~~~~~~~~

           Tommy woke up the next morning with an unbearable headache. He could hardly see for a moment and his body groaned with protest as he sat up. The bed beside him was empty and bright sunlight shone through the curtains. So he naturally assumed it was late in the morning and Leah was already up and out.

           “Fuck…” He swung his legs around to press his feet to the floor. The pounding in his head was merciless as he rubbed his eyes. But he was slowly starting to remember a few things about the night before. The gauze on his hand reminded him of the glass cutting his palm. The careful application of the bandage reminding him that Leah was there to take care of him. Her gentle hand escorting him to bed. And he’d dreamed something. Something odd. Leah sitting up in bed beside him, holding a baby girl in her arms.

           Strange.

Permanent Tag: @papa-geralt-of-cirilla @giftofdreams @biba3434 @kimmietea @karmezii @enrapturedbythemoon @vampgirl1997 @tarafaithe

Tag list: @shelbyblinded

Masterpost

PB Masterlist

[loserholland]

12 Years

𝟎𝟎𝟏 𝐒𝐢𝐠𝐧 𝐢𝐭 𝐚𝐰𝐚𝐲

𝟎𝟎𝟐 ➺ 𝐓𝐢𝐦𝐞 𝐒𝐭𝐚𝐧𝐝𝐬 𝐒𝐭𝐢𝐥𝐥

Pairing ➺ Tom Holland x Reader

Warning ➺ Whole lotta angst��

Word Count ➺  1,970

Summary ➺  Marriage can be hard.

A/N ➺  I also just started a permanent taglist so if you want to be on my permanent taglist please don’t be afraid to send me an ask!! Also should I do a part two?

✿ 𝓟𝓮𝓻𝓶𝓪𝓷𝓮𝓷𝓽 𝓣𝓪𝓰𝓵𝓲𝓼𝓽 ✿ - @hollandfieldblurbs 

☞  Masterlist  ☜

12 years. 

That’s a long time if you ask me.

12 years of being together, 5 years of dating, 1 year of engagement and 6 years of marriage. 

During that duration of time that was one hell of 12 years, so many ups and downs. Ever since Tom had came back from filming, he seemed a little off he has been quite distance and quiet. 

(Y/N) couldn’t put her finger on it, she pushed it to the back of her mind telling herself that he may be jet lagged or trying to re-adjust to the time difference that’s what her heart told her. Yet her mind said other wise.

She didn’t want to suspect the odds, she didn’t want to question the vow that they had made to each other so she continued to lie to herself. That was until their 12 year anniversary.

It happened just like yesterday, Tom had been out all day at the gym and so (Y/N) had made a beautiful candle light dinner and dressed in one of Tom’s favorite dress that he loved on her. She lit the last candle on the dinner table as the front door unlocked a small smile painting her lips “Just in time.” she whispered to herself as she headed to the hallway to greet her husband.

“Hey, perfect timing!” the voice of his wife greeted as Tom kicked off his shoes he wore a confused look on his face as his wife leaned up to kiss his cheek. “What’s all this for?” (Y/N) brow’s furrowed for a second before letting out a dry laugh “Today is our 12 year anniversary, today marks the day you  asked me to be your girlfriend..” Tom’s facial expression changed as his mouth formed a small ‘o’ “Let me go shower first I’m um all sweaty..” Tom began to head up the stairs. (Y/N) let out a shaky breath, she was done listening to her heart, she didn’t want to accuse her husband of 6 years of cheating her best friend of 12 years abandoning their vows. 

“You have been so distant lately. Did I do something wrong? Is it because you’re jet lagged? Are you still trying to get use to the time change because you came home almost a month ago I’m pretty sure you would’ve been back on your normal schedule. But the one thing I don’t want to ask you is something I’ve pushed to the back of my mind, something I don’t want to suspect my husband of 6 years abandoned a vow he made to his wife. So please ease my mind, please tell me I’m crazy and thinking other wise please Tom please.” tears, tears slowly streaming down her rosy cheeks.

“Tom please tell me I’m wrong.” Tom lowered his head in shame before turning around to look at his wife, he wanted to run down and hug her but he felt disgusted with himself for causing her to lie to herself about what her own husband had done to her. 

It was the look that painted it face, the way his muscles tensed as he turned to look at his wife. It was the aura that filled the house, the silence so loud you could go deaf. He wanted to ease her mind, he wanted to reassure her that he was trying to get use to the time difference. But the last thing he wanted was to continue lying to her, the love of his life, his best friend, his soulmate.

“You’re not wrong.” 

Pain

Betrayal 

It was all she could feel for the next few months, they passed each other everyday their house was so quite you could hear her heart shattering. They lived like ghost, Tom now slept in the guest bedroom along with his clothes in the guest closet 

Guilt

Sadness

It was all Tom could feel for the next few months, anytime his wife passed him she couldn’t even look at him. When their hands grazed against one another she immediately pull her hand away from his. (Y/N) had the master bedroom to herself, he didn’t want to be selfish and claim the master bedroom.

Empty

That was what they both felt, as they tossed and turned all night the space next to them.. empty. It was what the house felt like, empty. It was as if they were two strangers living together, passing each other everyday without a single word. They felt empty inside, something they wanted to fill a void with.

Monday morning, Tom had been up all night searching all night on what they could do to make their marriage work. Marriage Counseling. 

Where the two could talk and hopefully sort out what had happened for the past months. He walked into the kitchen, the house was so quiet she could hear his footsteps as he descended down the stairs she gripped the kitchen counter waiting for her coffee to finish pouring into her mug. “(Y/N).” his voice made her heart ache yet sent shivers down her spine, it’s been so long since they’ve talked.

“What is it Thomas?” Ah first name bases... ouch. Tom leaned against the island as he let out a shaky breath “I was uh, doing research and came across um marriage counseling if you’re up for it.” Marriage counseling hm.. I guess we could do that, it could save what we have. 

“How soon can we start?”

Rain, everyone seems to love it. The way grey clouds set in blocking out the yellow sun as fresh rain pours down onto the ground creating a intoxicating scent that everyone loves. When it rains people tend to stay in doors cuddled up watching a marathon of disney movies or kids playing around jumping into puddles with a huge smile on their face. Yet (Y/N) and Tom had others plans, sitting in a room with a counselor as fresh rain painted the windows setting the entire mood.

“How long have you two been married?” (Y/N) stared at her ring, her beautiful heart shaped wedding ring remembering the day Tom got down on one knee and asked a dying question you either say yes or no to. Hell she didn’t even let him finish, she got down on her knees and screamed yes one too many times as she kissed her boyfriend well now fiancé a dozen times. 

“Six years.” she whispered “I guess you could say we were high school sweet hearts.. we’ve been together since freshmen year.”  Tom worked up the courage to ask her out on a date around halloween time, and started dating around christmas. They spent every holiday together, every birthday, all the ups and all the downs together. 

“We dated for five years, we took a trip to Paris for her twenty-first birthday.. before we left Paris we had dinner on the eiffel tower and I uh proposed to her.. we were engaged for a year then we got married. Six years of marriage, 12 years together..” Tom answered awkwardly glancing at (Y/N) every other word but her gaze was fixed on the window watching as rain slid down the glass.

(Y/N) never really got an answer from Tom, she knew what he did but never got to the why part of the situation. 

“So why are you two here today?” Now that, that was the dying question (Y/N) glanced at Tom urging him to answer the question since it was his idea to do this. “Well, I was away filming for an up coming project and cheated on (Y/N).. it was a one time thing but I never told her till our 12 year anniversary.” That’s when the tears she had been holding back for the past three months came streaming down her face. It was as if she was a ticking time bomb at any minute she could just blow, the wall she had built up between her and her husband came crashing down as it tear slid down her cheek.

“Why?” she whispered finally turning her attention to Tom “Why did you cheat?” finally her question would be answered she’d be at peace with herself and wouldn’t cry herself to sleep every night. 

“I was lonely.. I was so drunk. You couldn’t fly out because of how busy you were at the hospital and it was a stupid mistake. I know I shouldn’t have done it but, it was just as if we were becoming distant everyday with you always working at the hospital and me going away to film it’s as if were always away from each other.” huh, so our jobs were the problem? He felt lonely? Imagine having to deal with three months of living alone while your husband is away filming in another country or state. 

“So, is our jobs the problem? I had to deal with you being away for three months, three months felt like an eternity. Hell, every time you leave to film it’s as if my life is in slow motion, I can’t live my life without you. It’s as if my life is on pause every time you leave to film because I don’t have you next to me in bed or to talk to at breakfast and dinner. When you’re away filming you have friends on set, I sit alone at home counting the days till you come home.” (Y/N) brushed away the freshly fallen tears.

Pain comes in all shapes and forms.

A beautiful thing never gives so much pain as does failing to hear and see it.

It’s been four months since they’ve been going to marriage counseling. They’ve made some progress but today (Y/N) had came home with divorce papers. Now they’re going back and forth at one another, it was a war of hearts.

“Do you seriously want to sign away 6 years of marriage?” Tom questioned as he pushed himself against the island watching his wife move away from him. 

“Yes! Honestly Tom, nothing has been the same even if we go to counseling we’ve still been so distant.” (Y/N) argued back as she wrapped her arms around herself.

“(Y/N), you are willing to sign away 6 new years, 6 thanksgivings, 6 christmases, 6 birthdays?” She didn’t want to sign away the memories they’ve made but she felt as if they were getting no where. 

“Yes.” It was simple and short but Tom was not backing down.

“We’ve been together for 12 years (Y/N), 12 wonderful years. You are willing to sign it away?” fresh salty tears pricked her vision as she let out a shaky breath she looked at away for a second trying to compose herself before answering Tom. 

“Those 12 years were over that day you came home from the gym, that day you told me you cheated so yeah.. I’m willing to sign away 12 years.” Tom clenched his jaw taking in a sharp breath before grabbing the pen that was set on the island. 

He signed his part setting the pen down loudly taking his car keys in hand and placed the papers in front of her “I’ll have my stuff out by tomorrow morning.” he brushed past her and into the garage. That’s when reality began to set in, he didn’t try to fight. He didn’t try to reason nor argue, he just signed it without a problem. It was over, the 12 wonderful years were over..

A part of her didn’t want to sign it and wanted to continue fighting for her marriage.

The other part of her came to accept what had happened and was willing to sign it.

She looked over the paper and sighed, the silence in the empty house was deafening. She just let the love of her life walk out without a protest. It was over, their marriage was really over..

[samwrights]

The Game // [1]

Summary: Tom Holland, Harrison Osterfield, and Jacob Batalon started a game back when they first began filming Spider-Man: Homecoming—to sleep with as many different extras as possible before the movie premiered. Their current targets are the ladies of the band Navy Skies, a ragtag group of young adults that were blessed with the opportunity to play in the homecoming dance scene. Fed up with the boys’ sick game, Laura and Zendaya are taking bets on who gets their heart broken first.

Pairing: fuckboy!Tom x OC, fuckboy!Harrison x OC, fuckboy!Jacob x OC, hints of TomDaya

Words: 2643

Inspo: Kick It // Neck Deep

Disclaimer: Lyric graphics were created by me, y’all. I’m not saying don’t steal it cause they’re not that impressive tbh but like don’t steal them.

Life was a pretty simple concept. Some people really wanted to complicate things and find deeper meanings within it, but at the end of the day, all there really was to it was to ensure you were living your best life. Dream big, work hard, and don’t allow anybody to take that from you. At least, this was the mentality that Cameron Lucia had adopted at a young age. She never let things like friends and family keep her planted in one spot. If they were truly family, they would never hold Cam back from chasing her dreams.

Or best case scenario, they came with her wherever she went; entirely inspired from her nomadic, carefree spirit. That was the situation she was currently in, anyway. At the ripe age of twenty four, Cameron and three of her closest friends she had met at her day job ended up packing up with her and moving out of state. It wasn’t that far fetched, or so she believed. The four of them had formed a band on top of their friendship and collectively decided they were going to move closer towards the music scene in Nashville, Tennessee in hopes of getting their big break. But after long debates about cost of living and not wanting to lose their city charm, the four of them settled on living in a northern suburb just outside of Atlanta.

The four of them had been living in their spacious, two bedroom apartment for the last six months and were still loving every second of it. Cameron always thought it was funny that people assumed they would be tearing out each others hair being in a band, living, and working together. With all of their different personality harmonizing, she knew they would prove everybody wrong.

The youngest of the group was Malachi, or Mac as he preferred, was freshly twenty one. Though lazy, he was the star socialite of the bunch. His charisma made their lives easier when it came to booking shows and just being the go-to person to have a one on one talk with. Ruby was the second youngest, but also held a very mature composure due to growing up way too soon—taking on the role of ‘Momma Bear’. Her incredible work ethic helped put all of Cameron’s dreams into motion. Danielle, or Dani, was a mere week younger than Cam and always focused on getting shit done, but they never held her back from being the life of the party. Cam was clearly the dreamer—always comping up or collaborating with her group of friends on proposing new insane schemes.

Together they supported each other in any which way they could, whether it be financially or trying to rationalize whatever impossible dream came to Cameron’s mind. They always started off crazy, like when she started booking their band at every single bar that she could possibly find in downtown Atlanta. They always ended up working out in mysterious ways, like when booking agents and producers wanted to feature Navy Skies in an upcoming unknown film right here in Atlanta. They couldn’t pass the opportunity up.

That chance brought them to where they were today, sitting in make up getting their hair done for their brief cameo on this unknown film project. Cam, Ruby, and Dani did their own make up at their own request. Since Mac had a buzz cut and the girls were only getting their hair done, he took the liberty to get his make up done, enjoying getting pampered with the miniscule amount of make up they gave him. “It feels like a facial that I so desperately need.” He laughed, causing his friends to laugh with him.

The band was called to set, and they followed a stagehand down the hallway of the school they were filming in, and entered the gymnasium. Heads turned upon the group entering—everybody was dressed in semi-formal attire while a banner that read ‘Homecoming’ hung behind the stage. That explained why the outfit selection they were all given were all dresses and dress pants.

“So for you guys, we don’t need anything super directive.” The stagehand said. “Think of this as a recording session, we’ll ring an alarm when we need you to kill the sound completely.” He explained that the amplifiers were going to be kept to a minimum; just loud enough to be ambient noise but not enough to overpower any dialogue. They were only required to do a half hour set, and none of the band mates didn’t have to talk throughout the set as they normally would have for a show.

“Okay, cool. Let’s get set up.” Said Ruby as they got on stage and unloaded their instruments. Cam set up all the microphones while Dani assembled her drum kit, and Mac and Ruby tuned their bass and guitars respectively. The gymnasium was packed with unknown people pretending to be students. If anyone would have known any of them, it would have been Malachi. But the only one he had recognized in the crowd was Zendaya, which was enough to leave Mac the slightest bit starstruck.

The experience was actually pretty cool and almost felt like a real show to the band. The fake students bopped along and some even danced with each other. When cameras weren’t zoomed in on actors, whom Navy Skies assumed to be major characters of the film, said actors were dancing amongst themselves and just being goofy. Zendaya was swinging along with the people she had grown close to over the duration of them film—Harrison, Jacob, and Laura. “Hey, these guys are pretty good.” Z said as she danced with Harrison. The students in the crowd were yelling along and cheering on the band, nearly forgetting they were extras in a film. Jacob and Harrison were no exceptions to Navy Skies’ hypnotism as they paused their movements for a brief moment. Jacob nudged Harrison, a knowing look in his eyes with a devilish smirk on his lips.

“Who you calling dibs on, mate?” Haz asked, reciprocating his friends now wicked features.

“I like the little blonde one on drums.”

“Perfect, I’m digging the guitarist.” He said, staring at the girl with a curly pixie cut. Harrison’s eyes were immediately drawn to the tattoos that covered both arms from shoulder to wrist. Zendaya and Laura rolled both of their eyes.

“Are you guys playing your stupid game again?” Laura asked. The boys just grinned in affirmation. See, since the beginning of the filming Spider-Man: Homecoming, Jacob, Harrison, and Tom started an unnamed game to see which of them could sleep with the most extras from the set. Right now, Harrison was the front runner, despite being an extra himself.

“I’m going to laugh so hard when this stupid game blows up in your face.” Zendaya sneered, a sly grin on her face at the mere thought.

“How do you figure?” Jacob asked. “They’re extras, they’re here for like a day and then it’s like it never even happened.”

“One of you guys are going to fall for your flings, and then she’s going to find out she was just a part of some stupid game and hopefully she puts your asses in place.” Laura added, taking a firm stance with Zendaya that what they were doing was wrong on so many levels. “You guys need a reality check.”

“Nah, that won’t happen.” Both Harrison and Jacob said in unison, their eyes focused on their targets. No, it wouldn’t happen.

Navy skies finished their half hour set with the alarm buzzing within in the gymnasium, signaling that sounded needed to cease. After setting down their instruments, the band mates took a seat off the edge of their stage, taking a drink from the water bottles provided from the film crew. Each of them were panting slightly, covered in a thin film of sweat from having to continuously perform. “I think we sounded pretty great.” Cam said as she tried to catch her breath. The band talked amongst themselves, only pausing when they noticed the same stagehand from before walking up to them. Behind him stood Zendaya and the people she was dancing with earlier in the scene, plus one more that none of them recognized.

“Hey guys, everything sounded amazing! But the cast was wondering if you could play an encore show? We’ll make it worth your while.”

“Keep talkin’.” Dani said, immediately switching to hardball mode despite being the smallest member of the band.

“We were thinking of tossing you guys an extra grand?”

“What?! Hell yes!” Mac screeched before the band could discuss it. Which, in any other circumstance would have angered the girls, it weren’t for the fact that they just earned five grand off of a show that didn’t require them to put a down payment for the venue. There was no argument to even be had.

“I guess that’s a yes.” Cam laughed. “But can we get a couple minutes to cool off?”

“Oh yes, of course. Take a breather, you guys can go change back into your street clothes if you want. I’ll let you guys know when you go on and you can treat it like a real show this time—no cameras.” The stagehand walked away, leaving the band to head off in the direction of the dressing room they had used earlier to change back into more comfortable clothes.

While the cast waited by the stage, Harrison and Jacob got Tom up to speed, letting him know who claimed who so far. “I guess that leaves me with the singer, is it?” He asked, staring at the girl with incredibly long brunette hair as the band returned to the gymnasium. Even in a simple baseball tee and ripped jean shorts, the front woman’s tattoos were the most noticeable features about her. They covered every visible inch of her arms and hands, even up her neck. He wondered what other parts of her body were tattooed. Tom, unfortunately, had been filming a different scene and didn’t get to see the band play. But judging from Harrison and Jacob’s infatuation with them, they must have left some kind of impression. With a couple of strings being pulled, Tom was able to get them to put on an encore show.

The band returned to the stage, trading in their dresses for ripped jeans and solid tees and looking much more relaxed. The cast walked up towards the stage, Zendaya being the first to break the ice and introduced herself to the band. “Hey, guys. We just wanted to say how much we all loved hearing you guys play and hope you don’t mind that we asked the film crew to have you guys play an encore.” She said, gesturing to herself and Laura and the boys. “I’m Zendaya, and this is Laura.”

“Oh, party. Mac, I’m the bassist.” The only male member shook both of the ladies’ hands firmly.

“Ruby, guitar.” She gave a slight wave to everyone. Harrison’s mouth twitched with the slightest smile as his target introduced herself.

“Dani, drums.” The petite blonde gave an awkward wave.

“And I’m Cameron.” One by one, the boys learned their prey’s names. It was officially game on now.

“I’m Tom, lovely to meet you, darling. I play Spider-Man.” He held his hand out to Cam, awaiting for her to shake it. Instead, the band all looked at each other before letting out a collective laugh. Tom looked at them confusedly, retracting his still empty hand. “What’s so funny?”

“We’ve been trying to figure out what movie we were going to be in for the last month.” Ruby said, still chuckling. The collective group shared a laugh briefly. As they waited around for the encore show to start, the group chatted amongst themselves, the boys buttering up their marks while Mac, Z, and Laura hung out.

“So, Spider-Man, is it?” Cam asked, her natural teasing tone coming through as she spoke to Tom.  “How did you land that role?” He laughed, answering with charm that he usually reserved for interviews. Cam was nodding along, showing she was listening.

“How long have you lot been in a band?” Tom fired back, his British accent resurfacing as he pulled himself out of character for the day. He knew he needed to keep his questions as innocent as possible to earn the trust of his prey before he could corner her and go in for the kill. Though she had answered, he hadn’t quite heard it due to focusing on his own thoughts more than their conversation.

The stagehand came back, clipboard in hand along with four sealed envelopes that he distributed to each of them. “You all ready to go?” He asked, looking at Navy Skies. They all nodded before hopping back up from their seats on the stage, getting ready for round two. By now, all of the actors, main crew and extras, gathered around.

“Ready guys?” Cam asked into the microphone while looking at her band mates.

“Let’s kick it!” Malachi enthused, signaling their start to a newer alternative set list that they had been working on in recent months. Cheers amongst the crowd erupted as heavy, fast paced chords blared along the amplifiers—this time at full volume. The cast took immediate notice to their stage presence, seeing how Mac and Ruby were in six with little head bangs as Cameron walked the length of the stage. She crouching real low to be face to face with the front row that was made up of Laura, Harrison, Jacob, Zendaya, and Tom before walking up beside Ruby. As she wrapped an arm around her guitarist, harmonizing their siren song as they sang out their next verse.

Cameron took back center stage, opening her arms wide while her bassist and guitarist joined in for the last line. The final words lingered before rapidly moving onto their next song. It was no help that Zendaya and Laura were looking at the boys, each of them unknowingly jumping along to foreshadowing words.

“Do you think they’ve realized?” Laura asked, yelling into her friends ear to be heard over the music. Zendaya shook her head.

“Definitely not. These girls don’t even know them and they’re calling their shit out.”

“Wanna make a little wager?” Zendaya raised her eyebrows, giving Laura an intrigued smile. “I’m betting all of them are going to fall for their targets. Whoever loses has to be the one to tell the girls they’re just another name to add to their list.”

“I’m betting Harrison falls for his.” She replied with a deep set smirk on her lips. Honestly, it didn’t really matter who won this bet—Z was just excited to see someone break it to them that they couldn’t just run around doing this to poor, unsuspecting girls. They had learned to tune out Laura and herself after the game had been established.

“Harrison? He’s the one winning their stupid thing!” Laura said in disbelief.

“Well, let’s get real, Jacob’s girl seems like she would only go for a one night stand.” At Zendaya’s statement, their eyes turned to the drummer. “And I could see Harrison falling for a girl like her. He’s the only one who’s got a real chance of being heartbroken.” She said, discreetly pointing to Ruby.

“What about Tom?” Laura asked.

“Please, Tom may be a participant in this silly game, but he’s in dead last and he would never fall for a girl like that.” There was the slightest sneer in Z’s tone as they glanced at the lead singer. “Besides, we all know I’m the one he falls asleep with at night.”

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[maevefiction]

Your Light in the Mist - Chapter 40

We wound up staying at Diana’s until Sunday, then headed home to the chaos that awaited us. My gift for Tom had been well received, the shades of red he’d turned much like watching a tomato ripening in a time lapse video. We decide to wait until he was done filming to have our playtime, hoping things would be a smidge less stressful and that we’d actually have plenty of time to just fuck around. Literally, as the case happened to be. He’d given me a leather lingerie set, complete with crotch-less panties and a corset that I knew would turn my boobs into a squishy shelf…but the best part was the policeman-style cap, which I’d been wearing around the house to torment him.

Monday was spent in the office with Trudy, testing and testing and testing again, over and over, until any bugs we’d found were worked out. As far as we could discern, we were ready to roll. After the security company was done installing everything on Tuesday, it was time to go live with the group of 50 we’d chosen as beta testers. Luke, who’d left at noon with Simon to take care of the final wedding prep tasks, texted me more than two dozen times to express his amazement as he delved into Manageall’s features before, I assumed, Simon took his phone away from him. Radio silence ensued until midnight, when Simon came knocking at the door in a full blown panic because he wasn’t certain his shoes were the same shade of white as his suit. It took me more than an hour to convince him that they were, in fact, the same, and he wrapped me in a grateful embrace and finally left me to get some rest, Tom already in bed and snoring.

The office was officially closed for the next five days, so on Wednesday, when I wasn’t practicing singing, I pretended to not be working while I was actually working until it was time for the quiet dinner we’d planned at Luke and Simon’s. It was just the four of us, plus Roland, who was an absolute delight. We bonded over movies, music and tech and as we were leaving he gave me a tentative hug, blushing furiously afterward, Simon whispering in my ear shortly thereafter that it looked like SOMEONE had a quickly developed a wicked crush on me.  

New Year’s Eve dawned crisp and clear, and Simon and I took a late-afternoon cab ride to Searcys so we could check in and make sure everything was exactly as it should be. We entered the Gherkin, and he grabbed my hand as we got into the elevator, his skin clammy.

“This is happening. It’s happening. I can’t believe it. It’s incredible. I’m so…happy. Also, I’m pretty sure I’m dying.”

I laughed. “You’ll be fine. Everything’s going to be fine. Fine.”

His eyes narrowed. “If that was your attempt at assuaging my nerves…LAME. SO LAME.”

“You think you’re the only one with nerves? I cannot, for the life of me, get the last part of the song right. Because I am not Nina Simone. My scatting SUCKS. SO HARD.”

He released my hand in order to poke me in the shoulder. “I AM GETTING MARRIED AND YOU ARE COMPARING YOUR NERVES WITH MINE?”

“Actually I’m trying to distract you, asshat. Not working, is it?”

“No. Do you have any booze?”

The elevator doors opened, and as we stepped into the room he burst into tears. The round tables were all in place, forming a ring around the room with the center reserved for dancing, with an open spot on the far side of the room where the DJ had begun setting up. They were covered in charcoal grey cloths that matched the gentlemen of the wedding party’s suits, peppered with silver stars, glossy black circular Lucite slabs resting atop them. The centerpieces were twelve silver cylinders arranged in a ring, each with two white roses wound together in them, symbolizing midnight and two becoming one. Which was, you know, a totally minor detail that everyone would be too drunk to care about, but Simon had been so pleased with himself at coming up with the idea I knew he’d be pointing it out all evening and it was my duty as his maid of honor to fill in when he was too sloshed to speak any longer. The chairs, eight per table, were glossy black as well, the napkins gleaming white, the clear glassware and silver flatware smooth and unmarked. Above us was a net of white fairy lights that formed an artificial ceiling several feet below the pointed top of the room, and the floor was black stone, rectangular tiles shined to perfection, my reflection staring back at me when I glanced downward.

“Maude, Maude, it’s…it’s…I just…” He fanned his face with both hands. “Crying is bad. So bad. I can’t start off the evening looking like a puffy, splotchy nightmare.” Several deep, cleansing breaths later he was back in control, walking the room in search of imperfections. The sun had nearly set, and as we looked out the windows the city lights began to come on in quick succession, and the skyline was even more beautiful that it was during the daylight hours. As we drew closer to the DJ, the staff erected a rectangular table that would hold the cake and champagne fountain, the spot directly in front of it marked with an 18” silver star, indicating where the vow exchange was to take place. A voice sounded from behind us.

“A bit early, aren’t you, Simon?”

Turning around, I was stunned by the familiarity of the face in front of me. Her hair was dirty blonde, down past her shoulders, eyes a warm brown, smile welcoming and friendly. Dressed in loose black slacks and a black turtleneck paired with sensible black flats, I was tickled by the silver star-shaped earrings and chain belt she’s chosen to match the theme of the event. Around her neck was a black leather camera strap, the Nikon D5 it connected to in her right hand. Simon squeaked, then gave her a gentle hug, introducing us after pulling away.

“Maude Gallagher, meet Willa Morgan, high-end fashion photographer whom I suckered into shooting a wedding and now owe a huge favor that I will likely never be able to repay. Willa, meet Maude, Social Media Director for Prosper PR and my bestest friend whom I suckered into being my maid of honor which I’m sure she regrets and will hold against me for-ev-er.”

We both laughed, and I extended my left hand, which she shook firmly.

“Lovely to meet you, Maude.”

“Lovely to meet you as well, Willa.”

Her smile faded as she released me, replaced with a look of intense concentration. “Would you two mind standing on the star there so I can gauge some angles?”

We obliged, goofing around and pretending to make out while the poor woman attempted to do her job, eventually giving up on us, shaking her head as she laughed and set about acquiring shots of the rest of the set-up. I whispered in Simon’s ear as we moved to make room for the fountain assembly dolly.

“Um, is it just me or does Willa look EXACTLY like Brie Larson?”

He stared at her in the distance, then turned to me, eyes wide. “You know, I never thought about it before, but she really DOES. I wonder if I have a Doppelganger.” His nose crinkled as if he’d caught whiff of something vile. “Nah, there can’t be anyone out there as pretty as I am.”

It was going on six when we departed, waiting until every little thing was in place, right down to the wedding favors, which were silver mesh bags containing black and white M&Ms with Luke and Simon’s faces on them. I would never forget the day we texted about it, both of us rendered unable to correspond for at least ten minutes after Simon suggested having a special batch made up with dick pics on them for any guests who annoyed him.

Upon my return to our building I was thrown without pause into the chaos that surrounds any wedding party preparing for the celebration. I would be joined at Simon’s side by Roland and Phaedra, who was thrilled that she was so loved that she’d been included as a friend and wasn’t stuck sitting out as the mother of the groom. Luke had Tom, as well as Emma and Darren, his best mate from university. I hadn’t realized how close he and Emma were, but she and Tom had both followed him over to his own firm for personal reasons as well as professional ones. Emma and Phaedra’s dresses, both still hanging on the rack in the hall, were dove grey, with a halter-like top, almost a V-neck with the sleeves removed, leaving only a ribbon of fabric over each clavicle and connecting with the bodice, shoulders fully exposed. They were, in a way, the reverse of my dress. The waist was high, an under-slip of satin topped with translucent silky fabric flowing to ankle length. When I entered our flat my female cohorts were standing in the middle of the living room, clad in white terry-cloth robes, waiting for the make-up and hair team to ready their materials. Emma ran to embrace me.

“Maude! Hi hi hi! It’s been a bit, how are you? So great to see you!”

I squeezed her back, letting go and pulling away when one of the make-us-beautiful people thrust another white robe in my direction. “I’m good, how’s everything with you?”

Her nose scrunched, and she bit her bottom lip briefly. “Well, I’m starting to stress, if I’m honest. The benefit is seventeen days out and I’m still waiting on confirmation from people as to what songs…”

I interrupted her. “Aaaannndd I’m one of those people. Shit. Sorry. Gonna speak for Simon too, because he’ll never remember to tell you. I’m doing ‘Before I’m Dead’ by the Kidney Thieves, Simon’s doing Nirvana’s ‘Heart Shaped Box’ and together we’re attempting ‘Crystalized’ by the xx. Here, I’ll text you that right now. Do you need the durations? I can send you the files too if you want.”

She brushed the side of her hand across her forehead. “Phew. Thanks, that’s one down. Please, do send the files if you have them. I’ll check the length myself. And thank you for being willing to do it…I feel so blessed to be surrounded by such generous people. Ohhh…by the way, I’ve seen the app and it is INCREDIBLE. Can’t wait to use it...” She sighed as one of the hairdressers called her name, then smiled. “Oh well. We’ll get to chat in the car on the way, I’m sure.”

A snort escaped me as I typed out a message for her. “Like Simon’s going to let any of us get a word in edgewise.”

We both laughed, and Phaedra looked up from her own phone, waving as I headed to the bathroom to undress. Once my robe was safely secured over my nakedness, I opened the door to find one Thomas William Hiddleston standing five feet away, already dressed for the evening in his charcoal grey suit, white shirt, silver tie, cummerbund and pocket square. He smiled, and I first melted at the sheer beauty of him, then had a mild panic attack when I realized that the six months until I’d see him dressed for our wedding seemed both like a second and an eternity all at once.

He waved. “Hi.”

I waved back. “Hi. You look like…like…like you should come on over here and kiss me.”

His head shook from side to side, slowly. “That’s a terrible idea.”

“Is it?”

He nodded. “Yes. Because I know what’s under that robe. And if I get any closer…”

Raising my hands up near my ears carefully, I began to move backwards into the bathroom. “Right. Okay. Yep. But you know the dress is kinda…worse…”

He saluted, body tensing visibly. “Well I’m off then. Love you.”

“Love you too. One word. Pasties.”

His response was but a muffled groan as he strode quickly into the hall. I was whisked away to a director’s chair, where Marcus sung the praises of my hair and tamed it enough so it could be left down and loose. Emma’s had been pinned into a bun at the nape of her neck, Phaedra’s braided and wound around her head, creating a band of sorts. They were both in the middle of a pre-makeup facial, which I had no interest in receiving but quickly discovered wasn’t optional. After I was deemed clean, fresh and acceptable, foundation was applied, then silver crème and smoky grey shadow, black winged liner, and black mascara. My lips took the longest, first lined with a deep, dark red, then carefully painted blood red, and finally coated with a several layers of silver glitter gloss.  I stood and stretched, arms straight up over my head, sighing softly as I lowered them back to my sides. An older woman approached me, black hair, rail thin, dressed in pink yoga pants and a black and white fitted T-shirt with a giant Hello Kitty on the front. There was a large brown satchel over her shoulder, and a garment bag slung over her outstretched arm. She smiled beatifically.

“Hello, Maude. I’m Gillian. Ready for your dress?”

“Yes. Yes I am. Thank you. Where would you like me?”

Her steel-blue eyes narrowed for a moment. “Well, we’ll need a private space, unless you don’t mind…”

My left hand shot up to shoulder height, palm toward her. “I’ve managed to make it this far without anyone in the room seeing my boobs…let’s keep the streak alive and head up to the master bedroom, if that works for you.”

She nodded, and I led the way, allowing her to enter the space first, then followed, closing the door behind us.

“Lovely flat you have here, Maude.” She placed the garment bag on the bed, ever so gently, and the utter weirdness of having a stranger in a place where so much intimacy happened made me cringe. Just a little, but still…a cringe. Gillian set her satchel on the chair and began rummaging through it, pulling out a small package and a bottle of what I knew had to be body glue. She looked around, pointing toward the bathroom.

��Probably best if we apply the pasties in there…oh, I almost forgot…” Her hand delved back into her bag, neon pink nails seeming to flash as she moved. “Ah, here they are. I have panty options for you as well, in case you need them.”

“Thank you, Gillian. I think I do need them…all my stuff is either dark or patterned.”

She walked into the bathroom, hot-pink Mary Janes clicking on the floor, and I followed. She spread everything out on the countertop…first came the half dozen pasties, all different shades, but all circular with a silver star that matched the dress perfectly in the center. Next to them she plopped a pile of fabric, the details as yet indiscernible, but there was a variation of tone there as well.

Her hands clapped together. “All right then…set your robe aside and we’ll get to work, if you please.”

I undid the tie, let the front hang open, then pulled my arms back through the sleeves and let it fall to the floor. She looked me up and down.

“Oh good, I believe I’ve gotten your sizing just right. And, you wax. Thank the lord for small favors.” I could feel my right brow rise against my will. She laughed. “No shade intended, but gals who prefer the au naturel look make it a bit harder for me to conceal the works without them wearing boxer briefs. With the style dress you have, it has a tendency to ruin the illusion, if you know what I mean.”

“I understand completely.”

She sifted through the pile and held up something that could only be described as a high-waisted thong. I took a moment to consider whether or not I was okay with my ass cheeks hanging out, then quickly shook my head. Next was a simple brief, and I nodded.

“Excellent choice. They’re form fitting and will be rather snug, which should be just fine with your shape. I don’t see much chance of spill-over happening. Now, let’s see which tone matches your skin best.”

Once that decision was made, I put them on…and she wasn’t kidding about the snugness. They were, like, snug to the tenth power snug. But, just as she thought, the band sat right at my waist and thus, there was no muffin-top to be found. She walked around me, checking out the rear view, nodding as she circled back to my front.

“Perfect. They match so well it looks like you aren’t wearing a blessed thing.”

The pasties came next, in the same shade. I stayed behind when she left the room, figuring peeing before putting on the dress was better than going afterward, because with my luck I’d dip it in the bowl and this way I’d at least make it to Searcys in decent shape. Probably. Catching a glimpse of myself in the mirror on the way back to the bedroom, I decided I most closely resembled an extra from the Rocky Horror Picture Show, which started me singing the Time Warp under my breath. Gillian was cautiously removing my dress from its bag, and when she lifted her head to smirk at me I knew she’d heard me.

“Oh, that’s a classic, Maude. Well done. You should request it tonight.”

I chuckled. “That is an excellent idea. What’s a wedding without a good pelvic thrust session?”

We both laughed as I stepped into the dress, then slowly worked my arms into the sleeves. Gillian zipped me up, inhaling sharply as she walked round to my front.

“Gorgeous. My word. Futuristic, yet ethereal. Stunning.”

I walked over to the bedroom mirror to take a look, my reflection’s jaw dropping open. The transformative power of a bit of makeup and some fabric never ceased to amaze me.

“Wow, it really DOES look like I’m totally naked. Great job matching the tones, Gillian. Perfection.”

She’d begun gathering her things, stuffing them all unceremoniously back into the satchel. “Thank you kindly. Do you need help with your shoes?”

“Well…probably not…but if you have time…”

She nodded and retrieved them from their box on the dresser. They bore some resemblance to dance shoes, with a two and a half inch spike heel and thick sole in the rounded toe area, two half-inch straps across the top, thoroughly coated in large pieces of silver glitter that matched the stars on my dress perfectly. I remained standing with one hand on the bedpost to maintain my balance as she slipped them on and secured the straps.

“There you are, then. Take a few steps and make sure the straps aren’t too tight.”

I did, heels clicking on the floor, then turned back to her. “Just right. Danceable, even. Thank you.”

“You’re welcome. Let’s get you downstairs….it’s just about nine and the car needs to be en route by ten after at the latest. New Year’s Eve traffic is hellish, I assure you.”

Phaedra and Emma were waiting in the living room, and they applauded as I descended, both unable to resist the urge to fondle the fabric when I reached them. Emma’s eyes widened when she realized that I didn’t have a full netting underneath, as most sane people would.

“Maude, my lord, those…are those…the stars on your…”

Nodding, I reached out and patted her on the shoulder. “My boobs. Yes. Pasties.” She blushed, and Phaedra sighed.

“Oh, how I miss having breasts that don’t point directly at the floor. Enjoy them, girls, while you still can. The day will come when you have to be cautious lest you light them on fire whilst preparing a meal.”

Emma’s blush deepened. “Phaedrea, oh my god. You’re horrid.”

I did my best to suppress my laughter, but to no avail, and Phaedra joined in. “I speak the truth, Emma. It’s your future. Best embrace it.”

We were interrupted by Simon shouting as he traipsed through the open door.

“LADIES. OUR CARRIAGE HAS ARRIVED. WE MUST LEAVE AT ONCE FOR THE BALL.”

He stood by the kitchen counter, waiting, and I shook my head, incredulous at how absolutely perfect he appeared. Like he’d sprung up from the pages of an elite fashion magazine, his blonde hair slicked back, white suit practically glowing, and when he smiled, I damn near lost my shit.

“Dude. Simon. Dude. Seriously. My god. You’re like an…you look like…like…like an ANGEL. I mean, I know you’re NOT because, reasons, but WOW.”

Four steps forward brought him to me, and he kissed both my cheeks, then took my hands as he leaned back to inspect my attire. “You’re looking rather heaven-sent yourself, Maudie. And thank you. I do look damn fine, don’t I?” He kissed Emma and Phaedra next, expressing his appreciation for their beauty as well, and then we were out the door and down the stairs. Since the ceremony wasn’t until midnight there was no way to hide Luke and Simon from each other, so we’d decided to all share a single stretch limousine. Tom’s expression as he watched me approach him stirred up a slew of emotions in me, running the gamut from mild embarrassment to blatant desire, his unwavering stare seeming to bore right through the little I was wearing. As I drew closer his eyes filled with tears, his jaw unclenching as he smiled and reached for my hand.

“You. Are. So. Beautiful.”

I took hold of him, leaning in to catch his scent as we neared the limo.

“Oh good god, you’re wearing that new cologne again. That little hint of sandalwood mixed with orange…how am I supposed to LIVE?” He chuckled. “And thank you. You’re beautiful too, babe.”

He kissed my cheek as he helped me climb inside. “It’s going to be a long, long night, isn’t it?”

I nodded as I slid over next to Phaedra to make room for him just as Simon cracked open the first bottle of champagne.

“Oh yeah. I hope you have your phone, because I need to capture all this insanity so I can show it to their kids twenty years from now. Preferably right after they give them a lecture about how partying is so very, very inappropriate and bad for them.”

***************************************

It was five after ten when we arrived at Searcys, and the elevator ride up was unusually quiet, Simon and Luke clinging to each other and nervously adjusting each other’s lapels and white rose boutonnieres. Phaedra, Emma and I wore wrist corsages comprised of black netting and two intertwined white roses secured with silver ribbon, for which I was grateful. Schlepping around flowers and trying to have a good time while keeping them looking decent sounded like a total drag. Tom and I held hands, loosely, purely for the purpose of maintaining a physical connection. My nerves were still ever present, despite the fact that I’d sung in front of groups larger than this in the past. To be fair, I’d been intoxicated for most of those shows, though. Tonight, I’d try to lose myself in tasty tidbits and pretend that it was just a friendly karaoke bar, not someone’s once-in-a-lifetime moment. The doors slid open, and there we were, walking into a space that was positively overflowing with love for two people who deserved every single drop of it.

We were whisked away for photos, Willa directing us around the room, deciding who would be in which shots, carefully selecting the perfect backdrops. Once she was through with us, the hors d'oeuvres

stopped circulating and it was time for the seven course sit-down meal to begin. The wedding party was seated closest to the windows on the left side of the room, set back a few feet from the others. It was odd, eating prior to a ceremony, a backwards wedding of sorts, but the food was ridiculously delicious and the company unparalled so time seemed to speed on by. A sorbet was served as a palate cleanser after the main course, and at quarter to midnight we rose from our spots and retreated back toward the entrance where the hair and makeup folks were waiting behind oriental-style screens. Luke and Simon had timed their vows to last for five minutes, so the refresh was brief, followed by us all taking our places for the walk across the dance floor to the silver star marker. Phaedra and Darren walked first, followed by Roland and Emma, then Tom and me. Once we were on the proper sides, the wedding march began, and I had to bite my lip really, really hard so I wouldn’t weep at the sight of Luke and Simon walking towards us, hand in hand, their love for each other so clearly visible in their eyes, their expressions so joyful it was almost painful. They took their places on the star, Willa shooting discreetly yet furiously the entire time, and the officiant began. I missed most of that, only tuning in fully when the vow exchange began. Luke went first, his hand shaking as his right reached out for Simon’s left. His voice was clear, deep, and strong.

“Simon, that day you turned up for an interview…I thought that was the best day of my life. But it wasn’t, actually, because every day since that day has been the best day of my life. You’ve reminded me that there’s so much more to life than striving toward the next slot in the chain of financial success, shown me that joy can be found in even the smallest and bleakest moments. And, you’ve improved my wardrobe in ways I never could have imagined.”

Everyone laughed, and Simon reached up to pat Luke’s cheek.

“Over and above all that, you’ve taught me how to love, and how to love unconditionally. You are the man I dreamt of but never thought I’d ever find. My lover, my friend. It’s my honor to have you as my husband, and to be yours. From this day forward, it’s us, together, always. I call upon these persons here present to witness that I, Luke Windsor, do take thee, Simon Ahlberg, to be my lawful wedded husband. Will you accept this ring as a symbol of my commitment to you, to us?”

Simon’s voice broke as he answered. “Yes. I, Simon Ahlberg, take thee, Luke Windsor to be my wedded husband.” Luke slipped the platinum band onto his ring finger, then released him. Simon’s right hand reached out to take Luke’s left, and one incredibly deep breath later he began to speak.

“Luke. That day, when I walked into your office, I was on a mission. A mission to fundamentally change the way I was living. I was burnt out, used up, and in search of something new, something different, something that would inspire me, something that would make me wake up every morning excited and full of wonder. I thought that something would be an occupation, because that’s what filled my life before, but it turned out to be…you. Especially the waking up excited part.” Snickers and guffaws rose up around the room. “It was YOU. And I am the luckiest man, not only on Earth, but in the vastness of the universe, because I have you. Because you love me. ME! It’s ridiculously cliché, but Luke, you make me want to be a better man…and it’s my honor and privilege to share your life from this day forward as your husband. I call upon these persons here present to witness that I, Simon Ahlberg, do take thee, Luke Windsor, to be my lawful wedded husband. Will you accept this ring as a symbol of my commitment to you, to us?”

Both of their faces were damp with tears, and Luke swallowed hard twice before he responded. “Yes. Yes, yes, YES. I, Luke Windsor, take thee, Simon Ahlberg to be my wedded husband.”

Simon gently slid the platinum band, a twin of the one he now wore, onto Luke’s ring finger, then reached out to grasp Luke’s right hand with his left. The DJ began the ten second countdown to midnight, and the officiant spoke.

“Let it be known that these two men before me, and before all persons present, have, through their vows, declared themselves bound in matrimony. Ladies and gentlemen, I give to you…the Windsor-Ahlbergs!”

With that the clock struck midnight, Simon and Luke kissed, and congratulatory cheers mixed with shouts of ‘Happy New Year’ rang out. Tom was in front of me before the DJ could even begin to play Auld Lang Syne, his hands on the sides of my face as he bent so we were eye to eye.

“This is it. 2016. Soon enough, we’ll be saying our own vows, exchanging rings and I…I…I’m so in love with you, Maude. Happy New Year.”

His lips met mine, his hands wound around my waist, and mine around his, as we swayed to the music and I realized that I’d honestly never fully comprehended what it was supposed to mean, that New Year’s midnight kiss. Because any I’d ever received before hadn’t meant anything to me when compared to the way I felt right then, in that moment. We broke the kiss as the song ended, and the DJ’s voice boomed loudly through the sound system’s speakers.

“HAPPY NEW YEAR PEOPLE!” A round of cheering broke out again, and the DJ laughed. “All right, all right, you’re excited. Before we party, two things to take care of…the cutting of the cake by our happy couple, and…their first dance. We’re going to do the dance first, because you know someone’s going to get cake smeared all over them and that’s not a good look for the photo album, now is it? Luke and Simon have chosen ‘Feeling Good’ as their wedding song, and it will be performed by none other than maid-of-honor MAUDE GALLAGHER. Give the lady a hand!”

The applause was ridiculously loud, and I looked up at Tom, shouting over the din. “Happy New Year, you beautiful man. I love you. I’m probably going to die of embarrassment when I get to the scatting part, but…I love you.”

He kissed my forehead as he released me. “You’ll be amazing. Go. Do it. I’ll be right here, falling for you all over again.”

My head tilted to the left, mouth open, eyes narrowed. “Dude. I can’t even with you.” I planted a quick kiss on his cheek. “Thank you.” And then, a microphone magically appeared in my hand, and there I was, standing on that silver star, with Luke and Simon staring at me from the center of the dance floor. And so I dove into the first verse acapella, the way Nina Simone had done it all those years ago.

Birds flyin' high, you know how I feel Sun in the sky, you know how I feel Breeze driftin' on by, you know how I feel It's a new dawn, it's a new day, it's a new life for me. Yeah, it's a new dawn, it's a new day, it's a new life for me, ooooooooh... And I'm feelin' good. Fish in the sea, you know how I feel River runnin' free, you know how I feel Blossom on the tree, you know how I feel It's a new dawn, it's a new day, it's a new life for me, And I'm feelin' good Dragonfly out in the sun, you know what I mean, don't you know, Butterflies all havin' fun, you know what I mean. Sleep in peace when day is done: that's what I mean, And this old world is a new world and a bold world for me... Stars when you shine, you know how I feel Scent of the pine, you know how I feel Yeah, freedom is mine, and I know how I feel.. It's a new dawn, it's a new day, it's a new life for me And I'm feelin'... good.

The scatting was actually decent, and I knew that what I’d just completed was a personal best for me as far as performances went, and would probably turn out to be the best performance of my life. And it had little to do with me, at all. It was because of the two people running toward me, embracing me, and the love they had for each other that had set them free. And I knew how that felt, and that’s what poured up out of my soul, what powered my voice as I sang those words. Tom joined the group hug, then pulled me away from Simon and Luke.

“My god, that was incredible. You…I just…wow. Wow. Speechless.”

I grinned and pinched his cheek. “Oh, speechless. The best compliment Tom Hiddleston can possibly pay.”

He laughed, and the DJ announced that the time had come for cake chaos. Simon went first, and I was stunned when he held the piece steady and allowed Luke to take a dainty, mess-free bite. Luke’s full on face-smooshing smear fest when it was his turn was equally surprising…and insanely adorable, especially when he tried to help wipe it off and Simon kissed him instead. I turned to Tom.

“Two things. One, if you try to do that to me I’m going to bite your hand off and two, this is all so precious and perfect that I may soon vomit. Will cake help, do you think?”

He nodded. “Cake always helps. And then, dancing?”

“Yes. Cake. Dancing. More cake. More dancing. Repeat as necessary until the paramedics show up to treat either my sugar overdose or painful bodily injury.”

And that’s exactly what we did, until 4 AM rolled around and we staggered to the elevator, then out to the waiting car. Simon and Luke had taken their own to a nearby hotel, where they’d stay until late afternoon tomorrow, when they’d be boarding a plane to enjoy their five day honeymoon in Greece. Phaedra had agreed to see Roland home, and shared a car with Emma and Darren as they were all headed in the same direction, which left Tom and I to our own devices. He wasn’t blotto drunk, but drunk enough to be a terror as far as propriety was concerned, fingers running up and down the V front of my dress, caressing my exposed skin, hand slipping under the fabric to cup my right breast, letting out a frustrated groan because my nipple was hidden beneath the pastie. There was no privacy screen, and I gave up caring that the driver might see, or that he might crash while staring at our antics, instead pulling Tom into a kiss, his mouth tasting of whiskey and ale. Making out was enough of a distraction to get us home without actually exposing ourselves, and when we arrived he ran up the stairs to our flat, taking them two at a time, waited for me for ten seconds, then ran back down, then back up, over and over until I managed to successfully navigate my way to the landing in my stupid heels. His hands were shaking so badly he couldn’t get the key in the door, so I took over, and he pushed me inside as it opened, turned me left into the kitchen, then pressed me up against the counter overlooking the living room. I felt his hands lifting my dress, then on my lower back as he guided me to lean forward. Next were his thumbs inside the waistband of my underwear, rolling them down to my ankles. I heard him unzip, and I moved my legs as far apart as they could go, groaning as the head of him brushed against me before he thrust himself forward and home. It was quick and dirty, his hips rolling as his cock worked its way in and out, faster and faster until I came with a gasp and he followed, whimpering softly, then collapsing on top of me. Several minutes passed and just as I began to entertain the thought that he was out cold he whispered in my ear, voice lacking its usual resonance.

“I’m so sleepy. Will you tuck me in?”

“Yep. You’ve gotta get off me first, though.”

“Ohhhh. That’s right. I’m sorry.” I felt his weight lifting, then disappearing completely. I turned around to find him staring at me, eyes moist. “You’re beautiful.”

I snorted, then bent to remove my shoes so I could slip out of my underwear. “Thank you. You’re not so bad yourself.”

He turned me around slowly, unzipped my dress, then slid it off my shoulders and allowed it to fall to the floor. I rotated to face him, and he pulled me into an embrace and nuzzled my neck.

“Wife.”

“Soon.”

“Since I saw you.”

I inhaled sharply. “Thomas.”

“Love you.”

“I love you too, baby. Let’s go upstairs, okay?”

“M’kay.”

I made him go first, just in case. Not that I’d have been able to catch him if anything happened, but it made me feel better. I helped him undress, then tucked him in, as requested, kissing him goodnight before I headed off to shower. The pasties came off rather quickly, the makeup, not so much. Especially the glitter gloss, which made me grateful I didn’t have to deal with such shit on a daily basis. I toweled off, used the toilet one last time, then crawled in next to Tom. He rolled over, muttering something I couldn’t quite decipher as he wrapped his arm around me, hand cupping my breast. My eyes closed as his warmth enveloped me, and I dozed off trying to count how many days remained until June 29th.

****************************************

We spent the weekend recovering, just the two of us, heading out for food periodically but otherwise just enjoying…being. Time felt like the enemy, and even though I tried to ignore it, my brain kept counting of the days we had left before his flight to Australia. Monday I was back in the office, working on marketing materials for the app and testing the customer management systems with Trudy. The rest of the staff picked up any slack left by Luke and Simon’s absence, their duties relatively minimal as our client base had been made aware of the wedding and honeymoon schedule well in advance. Tuesday and Wednesday were more of the same, with the additional tasks of contacting all the beta testers to request their reviews and creating an instructional video to post on the main website. Thursday was freak-out day, as it was my last official day of work prior to launch, and the last night I’d be sharing a bed with Tom for more than two weeks. Seventeen days, to be precise.

Dinner was delivery pizza, followed by ice cream sundaes for dessert. Afterward, I helped him pack, and the strangeness of assisting the person I had grown so used to and loved having so close to me prepare to be so far away melted my brain a little. We showered, then attempted to sleep, but spent most of the night making love or simply staring at each other, as if committing as much detail as we could to memory so we’d have it as a touchstone while we were apart.

Friday morning we were out the door and into a waiting cab by ten AM in order to arrive at Heathrow in plenty of time for his twelve forty-five PM flight. It would be a long one, twenty-five hours at minimum, during which I hoped he’d get some rest. Brisbane awaited, and there’d be staff housing as well as opportunities to visit the Hemsworths in Byron Bay. Jordan had chosen the Gold Coast to film, Queensland offering savannah-like settings as well as a tropical rainforest.

Both of us were silent on the ride, holding hands, his thumb rubbing my wrist. We’d agreed to say our goodbyes just inside the main entrance, with me then returning to the cab and heading home while he checked in and went through security. The cab driver helped unload his baggage, then drove off to circle around until our paths coincided again, at which point he’d pick me up.

I felt like I was going to puke at the sight of the gates, which made me wonder if this was going to become a ‘thing’…me stress-barfing at airports. Tom set the backpack he’d slung over his shoulder on the floor next to the rest of his luggage, then turned to me.

“Well. Guess this is it, then.” He ran one hand through is hair. “Not sure I can do this, Maude.”

I reached out to touch his arm, reveling in the feel of his long blue coat. “Yes you can. It’s okay. It’s going to be fine. Seventeen days and you’ll be picking my ass up in Brisbane. No big deal.” His hand caressed my cheek, and I burst into tears. “Shit. I told myself I wasn’t going to cry, and now I’m crying. Epic fail. I’m sorry.”

He pulled me into his arms, one hand on the back of my head pressing me to his chest. “Don’t you be sorry. I’m the one who should be sorry. I’m the one who has to leave.”

I leaned backwards so I could see his face, noticing that he was trying to hold back his own tears but was losing the battle, one already spilling over and running down his cheek. “No, I am. I’m the one who has to STAY.”

We clung to each other, weeping quietly, until we both breathed deeply, knowing it was time to let go, whether we liked it or not. I wiped away my tears with the back of my hand. “All right. I need to get the fuck out of here before I wind up throwing myself on the floor and wrapping my arms around your leg like a ball and chain.”

He laughed, then bent to kiss me…long, slow, deliberate and full of everything we couldn’t say. He broke away first, taking my hands in his.

“I am going to miss you like I’ve never missed anything ever before in my life. But we’ll text, we’ll call, we’ll Skype, and I’ll be busy and you’ll be busy and the days will pass and you’ll be back in my arms again in the blink of an eye.”

I nodded and let go of his hands. “It’ll all be okay. I know. You know. It doesn’t make it suck any less, but it’ll be okay. Stay safe, Hiddleston. I love you. Heart and soul.”

He smiled, red-rimmed eyes displaying a glimmer of hope, and joy. “I love you too, Maude. Heart and soul. I’ll see you soon. Good luck with the launch, and the show.”

“Tell Kong I said hello. And, you know, everyone else, too.”

“I shall.”

With that, he gathered up his luggage, returned the backpack to his shoulder, then turned away from me and began to walk down the hall. I waited for a moment, staring at him, and he spun around quickly, waved, then turned back around and kept going, and I turned myself and half-jogged out to the curb, choking back seemingly endless sobs as I waited for the cab that would bring me back to our flat. Our flat, with just me in it. Alone.

[bunnyandbirb]

Birb’s B-Movies #1 : Birdemic: Shock and Terror

IMDB : 1.8 / Rotten Tomatoes : 19%

Birdemic: Shock and Terror is a 2010 ““““romantic thriller”””” film written, directed, and produced by the same guy (which we all know is the hallmark of a good movie.) Unlike those masterpieces however, Birdemic doesn’t feature the writer/producer/director James Nguyen as its lead actor... though I’m not entirely sure that it would’ve impacted the quality of the movie much either way.

I stumbled upon Birdemic a few years back and instantly knew that it would be one of my favorite movies of all time. It features all the characteristics of a *quality* film: comically bad acting, dialogue so stilted it’s hard to believe it was written by a real person, truly “special” effects - all compiled by what I can only imagine were two monkeys at an editing desk. It’s almost impossible to understand this movie without just sitting down and watching it, so I encourage you wholeheartedly to witness it yourself.

As the movie starts we’re introduced to our lead, Rod, who is clearly an alien still getting used to his new human body. The movie provides plenty of exposition into his life right off the bat, with five minutes of mundane traffic shots intermingled with equally dull shots of Rod driving. The same 20-second music clip is played on loop for the duration of this entire sequence, sometimes with a few second pauses in between each repetition.

When he finally decides to get out of the damn car, Rod has a horribly audio-balanced interaction in a diner, where he creeps on some girl that he remembers from high school. The girl, Nathalie, is a model who has photoshoots exclusively at one-hour photo studios in strip malls. She diligently cuts her sandwich into pieces and leaves the diner without eating any of it. I originally assumed that Rod runs after her to ask what her problem is, but alas. Instead the two have a painfully awkward conversation and split ways after exchanging business cards (score!) Apparently, director Nguyen had told Nathalie’s actress not to socialize with Rod’s actor outside of filming. This is either because he wanted to keep Rod’s extraterrestrial identity a secret, or he wanted to ensure that the two main characters would have no chemistry whatsoever. He succeeded at one of those, at least.

Rod spends his time watching news broadcasts on global warming, driving through more traffic, and wearing long sleeves under a t-shirt to play basketball. Not only is he terrible at pretending to be human, Rod is also one of the worst salespeople I’ve ever seen.

But hey. Despite barely being able to string together a coherent sentence, Rod somehow manages to whip million dollar deals out of his ass without even breaking out of his monotone. So maybe I’m the dumb one.

The next 50 minutes of the movie pass by like this:

Some guy comes by to install solar panels.

Our favorite couple find a jpeg of a dead bird on the beach.

Nathalie’s mom forgets her lines but they keep the take anyway.

This scene happens.

Rod calls Nathalie his “Hot Ferrari.”

There is a performance of the most memorable song of this century.

Rod and Nathalie go on three (count it, 3!!) awkward dates.

One of these is a double date where they go to watch An Inconvenient Truth.

Another is a mostly silent outing to a pumpkin festival, where Rod looks like he is desperately trying to understand the world around him.

Finally, Nathalie and Rod end up in bed together. There are several agonizingly slow pan shots of seemingly random stock footage of landscapes before we are rewarded with this:

Yes. Those are birds dive-bombing a town, complete with plane sounds.

Rod and Nathalie wake up, and it is revealed that Rod likes to have sex with his pants and belt still on. (This is probably the biggest plot twist in the movie.) They look out the window and see an animated gif of a bird hovering right in front of the glass. After realizing that their phones all don’t work, they push the mattress against the window (which is supposed to help… how?) The birds eventually all leave for no reason and they meet another couple, Ramsey and Becky, that was staying in the room next to them.

The four of them run to Ramsey’s car in preparation for another bird attack, all wielding the most efficient weapon possible: clothes hangers. This swiftly leads up to the greatest fight sequence of all time.

They drive out of town, saving two zombies disguised as children on the way. Ramsey, an ex-marine, drops this line of wisdom: “I'm just tired of all the fucking killing in Iraq. Why can't we just give peace a chance?” before picking from his arsenal of assault rifles and opening fire on any birds in sight.

In between towns, they meet a scientist named Dr. Jones (who Rod eloquently points out by saying, “Hey, look! There’s an old guy on the bridge!”). Dr. Jones lectures to the group for what seems like forever, explaining the dangers of global warming and loosely using that as a reason for the sudden bird attacks. And no, it doesn’t make any sense.

Becky gets instakilled by a bird while innocently taking a shit in a field. The poor girl hardly even got to say any lines. Ramsey and Nathalie try their best to cry. Rod doesn’t even make an attempt.

As the rest of the group run away, they pass by a bus full of people who are being held hostage by birds.

Ramsey has apparently lost his will to live, and goes on a suicide mission to save the passengers. Of course this goes badly (how could it not?). Ramsey and the extras are all sprayed by some kind of bird acid, which looks suspiciously like orange juice with pulp. Pulp is pretty disgusting, so they all scream in prolonged agony and die on the spot.

Rod, Nathalie and the zombie children drive to a convenience store where Rod tries to buy gas from the very authentic Middle-Eastern owner. In fact, I have suspicions that the owner was not actually an actor at all, and Nguyen just asked him to say some lines for the movie. The guy looks like he does not give a single shit about what’s happening. It was also confirmed by the actors that the crew often just showed up to places to film without permits, so there’s that.

In any case, the makeshift family drives along until they get held up by a random cowboy who wants their newly-purchased gas.

He obviously dies via convenient bird, and Rod leaves the scene without even taking the gas with them.

At this point, Nguyen decides that he hasn’t shoved the moral of this movie in our faces enough. As our main characters enter a wooded area, we encounter Tom Hill, a “tree hugger.” Tom gives yet another hamfisted spiel about protecting the environment, only to end the conversation with “I hear a mountain lion! I gotta get back to my house and you better get to your car!”

A forest fire arbitrarily starts as they’re running back to the car, and they make their way to the final location of the movie: the beach.

Rod and Nathalie’s friends, the couple they went on a double date with earlier, are found dead in a car because why not. Rod catches a fish and Nathalie proves how useless she is by bringing back a tub of seaweed. The “kids” refuse to eat either of these things, presumably because they only consume human flesh. They all lock themselves in the car again as the birds attack one last time.

Then the birds leave. Why? Who knows.

We don’t get an explanation, but we do get this scene that doesn’t change until the end of the credits. As you can tell by the wing flaps-per-second, the group of birds on the right are in much better shape than the ones on the left.

Birdemic is a perfect example of a movie that has gone so far into the ‘wrong’ that it loops back into the ‘right.’ I already watch it at least once a month and if anything, it has completely changed my perspective on clothes hangers. The fact that a movie like this was made to be genuinely good gives it that b-movie charm that can’t be knowingly emulated.

Favorite line from the movie: “It's the human species that needs to quit playing cowboy with nature. We must act more like astronauts, spacemen taking care of Spaceship Earth.” - Dr. Jones

Thanks for reading this excessively long overview... OTL

~Stay tuned for more nonsense~

- birb

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