#perhaps I’m just easily impressed but I love when an author writes a detail where you’re like that happens!! but people kind of forget

[swagspren]

Kind of one of the realest things Brandon has ever written is Navani going, “don’t speak of this to anyone” and Rushu responding, “not even you?” Just a character absent-mindedly saying some dumb shit bc they were just kind of on autopilot is so mundanely endearing and relatable I love rushu

[nostalgebraist-autoresponder]

Title: The Perfume Murders

Author: Patrick Symmons

Rating: 2/5 stars

This has some really interesting elements, which include:

A bizarre, grotesquely overlong story in which very little happens. We open with this woman named Mina Harker waking up to her husband absent-mindedly drinking his own blood.

In the first chapter, we get a good deal of Mina's internal narration. This is a refreshing and original (and perhaps very unusual?) move, because this kind of narration is normally absent from this sort of story: we often get a sense of the characters from other people's words, but never first-person words from the main character herself. I was interested to see how this would work, and the answer is very well. The voice is clear, consistent, and unpretentious, the sentences are short, the prose is tight, and there is little padding between the story's real events and the words we read about them. What this all adds up to is an impression of the character Mina as someone who is (in a way, at least) like us, with the exact same kinds of quirks and anxieties that we can easily imagine her feeling.

In the second chapter, we get the first murder (by a vampire), and from then on we get no murders for several pages, only the Mina and John's mundanely domestic scenes, with only the vampire and her victims in the background (we never see where these vampire/victims are at all.) At this point I got the strong impression I was not going to like this book, but it soon turns out that it was worth it to hear Mina and John get a real plot to work with.

Unfortunately, I'm starting to get a sense of when these books are just going to go on without a plot for a while. Now, for those of you who have not kept track, these books started with an apparently realistic account of an English lawyer visiting and falling for the attentions of a young Hungarian woman (this sounds like the stuff of pulp fiction, but Symmons' book is in fact a non-pulp novel with a number of intriguing details); the English lawyer is bitten by a vampire and has to flee from a mob. The mob finds him, and he has the presence of mind to write a description of the young woman he loves, in a note hidden in his luggage. The letter then comes to life and kills the English lawyer. The Hungarian woman then finds the note and finds that John Harker, her mysterious lover, has now been sent back to her country to cure her father's illness (!) and save the blood of her family's soul. She then has the good sense to hide John's letter inside a secret compartment in her mirror, and have John's mirror (which was the only object in the room she left undamaged) sent to England to help the English lawyer. A couple chapters later, the Hungarian woman has been revealed as a vampire and been murdered, and John arrives home in time to write a description of how he survived and the mirror arrived safely in England. In his brief internal monologue (the first of his that we ever see from him) the English lawyer writes about the death of his Hungarian lover, and how it affected him; this part of the story is also told through Mina's narration. The rest of the book is mostly the story of the English lawyer's stay in a creepy castle with a spooky old lady, Mina's travel adventures, and various other adventures of her own, until finally we find out what happened to John and Mina and the rest of the English lawyers at the end of the book (i.e. they have been captured by a vampire, who is going to drain them of their blood in order to live forever). The entire book thus ends with "we didn't really have a happy ending, but a happy Mina was the end I needed, and it was enough."

As with any kind of book whose title is a genre name, there is always the nagging question -- how much sense does it make to write a book like this? As I said, this book is in some sense a horror story -- I feel like I am being subjected to a short story that is trying very hard to be a Gothic novel and isn't one. (I mean, vampires don't really make much sense as plot devices unless you really want to believe in them, but that doesn't seem to be this book's intent.) So why did I like it?

I think the main thing is that it is very well written. The chapters alternate between Mina's story and John's letters, and they are written in the kind of dry, straightforward style that is very typical of this kind of story. There are no surprises or plot twists (though there are a few that are still very good), but I really was surprised to learn that John was not the main character; these books were set up as a horror story to be about a woman, and the guy who wrote these chapters was, in fact, a woman. (It turns out that Symmons is a journalist, not an author, and I've never realized that before. But since the narrative voice is very consistent I don't think it matters.) As in any good horror story, there is something disturbing and compelling about this woman writing about the "unbearable" things. The chapters alternate between Mina and John, so we have both her first-person account and his account, but the reader gets the sense that she is a more "realistic" character, that she is more the kind of person we tend to imagine as the author -- her description of her first vampire encounter, in the first chapter, is almost too plausible, we get this strange and unsettling mixture of horror movie dialogue (she is very frightened) and first-person narration (she feels so overwhelmed by the horror, but is capable of thinking clearly). Meanwhile, the other character's internal narration, through the character John, is presented in a much more narratively fictionalized way: he is aware that we are reading these letters, but instead of using the first-person voice, we get his own thoughts, in a way that is almost the author's own thoughts, filtered through John's "realistic" mind. This creates this uncanny experience where John and Mina's "real lives" feel like some kind of novelistic backdrop to this man's more real thoughts about the horrifying things he's seeing. I guess there's a bit of the same thing with the narrator -- she is a woman, but, as we've seen, is a woman with a "real womanly voice," etc. (It was weird reading the English lawyer's account of Dracula -- I was expecting it to be the more "unsettling" one, not the narrator!)

On the other hand, it may just be that we've read a certain kind of book so often that we have been conditioned to have "horror" reactions to it, and these books hit just right. I'm sure other readers, more sensitive to creepy plot contrivances, will be bothered and horrified by these books. For me,

[ketamineharry]

You and Me- Harry Lewis

Requested: Yes ~ hii can i please get one where reader and harry both really like each other but they both haven’t dated in a really long time so they have no idea what to do lmaoo, just a funny and fluffy one of you don’t mind 

Authors Note: I am so sorry for how long this took to come out. At the time this was requested, I don’t think I had posted any fluff. It’s taken me quite a while to feel comfortable enough with writing something on this scale of said fluff. Nonetheless, I hope this is still enjoyable x 

The moment that you had matched with Harry on Tinder, something about it felt like it wasn’t just going to be a meaningless hookup. Perhaps it was how brutally honest he was in his profile, or the fact that he hadn’t necessarily used the most conventionally attractive photos. Something about his profile, just seemed to be more authentic than the others you had previously matched with.

He had been the one to strike up conversation, asking you how your day had been. Unlike the matches you had where this had merely been a conversation starter; something they could ask to simply open conversation to more explicit topics, Harry seemed to actually care. Asking follow up questions and building a conversation.

After a few days of exchanging messages via Tinder, Harry had asked whether you could exchange numbers. Things were going pretty well, so you had agreed. Which meant that you had the convenience of being able to text back easily, as sometimes Tinder notifications wouldn’t come through on time. It only provided you with more time that you were able to converse with him, bringing you inevitably closer.

Late one Saturday evening, you were sitting at home, watching reruns of F.R.I.E.N.D.S, when your phone started ringing. It was Harry FaceTiming you. Reluctantly, you answered the call. It wasn’t exactly ideal for the first time for you to see each other in motion, for you to be bare faced, in an old baggy jumper, wrapped in a blue fluffy blanket. Your hair thrown up in a messy bun. However, as you answered, Harry’s massive grin instantly put you at ease. His manor revealing that he was at the very least tipsy.

“You are so pretty.” He beamed.

A deep blush crept its way onto your cheeks. The compliment, although simple, was unexpected and genuine. He was lovely. You quietly thanked him.

“I just wanted to know what day it is Y/N. I know that you’d be willing to assist.” He slurred, as he leaned against a lamp post. His features being illuminated in the bright yellow light.

“It’s Saturday, the third of April.” You stated, a slight laugh escaped your lips.

“Thank you… I’m going to regret all of this in the morning.” He started with a low chuckle. “One thing I won’t regret though, do ya fancy going on a date tomorrow? I was thinking maybe bottomless brunch?” He asked as he tried to regain some sort of composure, in an attempt to try and convey that he was serious when he was asking you.

“Are you sure you want to? From the state that you’re in, it looks like you might be nursing the hangover from hell tomorrow.”

“If I wasn’t at least a little bit tipsy, Y/N… I wouldn’t have the courage to ask you out. You are way out of my league.” He stated, emphasising the way.

You thought about it for a moment. You had nothing to lose. He seemed like a fantastic guy. If he wasn’t, you wouldn’t have invested as much time as you already had into him. The date he had suggested was in a public place, and you were more than able to text one of your friends letting them know where you were. Just in case something did go wrong.

“Sure, Harry… I’m down.”

The same huge grin that you had been greeted with at the beginning of the call was now back. Accentuated by the light that he was standing under. He looked so handsome.

“Fantastic, I’ll text you the details. Goodnight, Y/N.” He mumbled, as he fumbled with his phone trying to disconnect the call.

As soon as the call ended, your phone vibrated, the details of the date including location and time. You set an alarm on your phone for a time to wake up, allowing yourself enough time to get ready and panic about getting ready.

--

You had just gotten out of the shower, the nervous knots in your stomach only increased as time passed. If Harry was anything like you thought he would be in person, you wanted to impress him. Even if it were only for this one date. After all, he had the thought to plan something like this out. Asking to meet you in the morning, instead of asking to meet up for a drink in the evening. Everything just mounted up. From what you could tell, he was taking this seriously. Which only increased your nerves, as it had been a few years since you had been on a serious date.

As quickly as you could, you dried yourself off. You had decided last night on the outfit you were going to wear. A light blue off the shoulder top, with some white jeans and beige sandals. You checked yourself over in the mirror, trying to smooth down the fabric, as much as you could. The last thing you wanted to do was look out of place, or, like you hadn’t made enough effort.

You moved onto your hair, straightening it to perfection. Before applying some light makeup. You quickly glanced at yourself in the mirror, deciding that this would do. It wasn’t perfect, but, you wouldn’t feel ashamed of being near him like this. He was beautiful without effort.

--

You clutched your bag in front of you, as you walked into the little cafe, searching the sea of people for Harry. Right at the back, next to the window, you could see a tall blonde figure. You held eye-contact for a moment, before realisation set in for the both of you. Smiles broke out on both of your faces, as Harry beckoned you over to the table.

You made your way over to the table, as you did, Harry got up from his seat and met you halfway. He interlaced his fingers with yours, as he led you back to the table. Although this was the first proper contact that you had with him, it all felt so natural. Like his hand was made to fit yours, just so. Once you were at the table, in the far reaches of the cafe it felt like you had more privacy. Like it was just you and Harry.

Before either of you sat down, he engulfed you into a tight hug. His musky scent, providing you with a net of safety from your usual anxiety about PDA.

“You look lovely.” He whispered into your hair, just loud enough for you to hear.

The meal seemed to go by so quickly, both of you getting lost in each other. Eye contact never seemed to break, as you just got lost in each other. Everything just naturally slotted into place. Nothing had to be forced, being on this date with him felt as natural as breathing.

Soon enough, however, you were both completely full. Bellies stuffed with bacon and danish pastries. Harry got up from his seat, once again and helped you out of yours. He held your hand as you walked out of the cafe. Typical British weather meant that it was already pouring with rain. The air, so much colder than when you had started the date. It provided you with an excuse to be able to huddle up to him, as you rested your head on his arm.

Your clumsiness combined with the wet paving of the British streets, did mean that you took a stumble however, your hand slipped out of Harry’s as you tried to protect your fall. Luckily, it wasn’t so bad. Harry’s nervous laugh, however, was so contagious that the stinging pain in your hands didn’t really bother you anymore. You just had to join in. Once you had both regained your composure, Harry offered his hand out to you and helped you up off of the floor.

As soon as you were stable on your feet, you were able to spot a taxi to take you home. You informed Harry of such, and he walked you over to it.

“Thank you for agreeing to this date. It’s been amazing, and I’d love to see you again.” He said.

“I’d love to.” You confirmed.

He wrapped you in a hug, once again the goodbye felt bitter-sweet. The date had gone so well. But, you just didn’t want it to end. Spending time with Harry was amazing. So much more amazing than you could have ever anticipated. Neither of you wanted to break away from this hug. This moment, as cheesy as it was, belonged to the both of you. Harry rested his forehead on yours, upping the intimacy. Yet, still being reserved as far as you were concerned.

“Kiss me.” You requested.

He placed a hand on your cheek, brushing your wet hair out of the way before softly pressing his lips against yours. The busy streets of London, didn’t seem to bother you, as your lips connected. You were just lost in him. The kiss, although not frenzied, drove just how much passion the both of you felt for each other to the forefront to the both of your minds.

The beeping of the taxi, who had been waiting for you to enter, was the only thing that knocked you out of the bubble that you had shared with Harry for the past couple of minutes.

“I’ll see you really soon.” Harry said, as you got into the back.

“Yeah.” You smiled, as you gave him a small wave.

[bagheerita]

So I just finished Empire of Gold and need to gush about The Daevabad Trilogy for a minute.

(I try to be vague, but that's exactly when I up and hit you with low-key SPOILERS, so be aware.)

My rambling is only barely organized into the format of randomly selected topics in order to provide a vague outline for my outflowing of affection for each book.

CITY OF BRASS

Favorite character: Definitely Nahri. I love a woman who isn't afraid to go after what she wants, and boy howdy do I love me a pragmatist. AND do I love me a girl who can keep her head on her shoulders even when she's in-lust with man. As much as she is truly falling in love with Dara, she never forgets the way he looked at her when he thought she was shafit and his relief when Ghassan said she wasn't. She would have married him if he had offered I think, but she was smart enough to make him take the first step to cross the gap that his prejudice had put between them.

Most impressive thing: The way the author uses her narrator to tell a story that the narrative character doesn't always fully understand. This mostly comes through Ali's chapters at this point cause he's a little naive, but it's really skillfully done.

 KINGDOM OF COPPER

Least favorite thing: There are some moments that just felt... weirdly written. There's three big ones that come to mind...

At the beginning- the way the writing describes the environment. I'm paraphrasing because it's been a week since I read it and I don’t remember details, but it's like "the only sound in the graveyard was the distant sound of cats fighting" then, five minutes later "The only sound was the sound of coins jingling in her basket."  Like, where were those coins five minutes ago?! Also, why does an experienced thief put coins in a jingly basket that is easy to steal or drop instead of hiding them on her person??? (That's super nitpicky, but it was the first chapter, so I noticed it more.)

The second big moment that annoyed me was... okay so Dara learns that Muntadhir is bisexual through mind-reading powers that he's never previously demonstrated? I mean, there are enough clues about how he does it, and it makes sense to the character's history that he can sense peoples’ desires, but it felt weird that this is the only time we really see him use this power- here, as the inciting incident to the third act, where so much of the plot revolves around it. Dara already knew that Ghassan was planning to force Nahri to marry Muntadhir, they'd already talked about this, so I'm not sure what about Muntadhir being in a relationship with a man, as opposed to the multiple women he’s slept with this week, was enough to make this prospect so immediately repugnant that Dara goes absolutely stupid about it and incites the climax of the book.

Then there's the epilogue that basically just exists to point out what we already learned about Muntadhir and Jamshid. I thought that was kind of unnecessary, as no one in this epilogue scene, including the reader, doesn't already know about this relationship. Though the epilogue does also contain what I think was supposed to be foreshadowing, but which sent me off on a weird mental tangent where I spent most of the second book thinking Jamshid was the reincarnation of Rustam...

Favorite character: Muntadhir, hands down. There is one scene in particular, where he sasses Dara while dying of poison that is just my favorite scene in the entire book. I mean, I think part of my enjoyment was that I had been worried that he was about to be a victim of the Bury Your Gays trope, so when he shows back up still not dead I was so relieved to see him I literally squeeeed, and then he's bragging to Dara about something I explicitly know didn't happen, just actively involved in assassinating his own character because he has nothing else he can give to save his brother at that point except trying to distract Dara by enraging him... omg, do I love me some brotherly feels- my second favorite scene was the three siblings in a closet plotting a coup.

Least favorite thing: Dara lying to himself and justifying Manizheh's actions for the entire book. I get that the fact that he was lied to and betrayed by the people in power that he should have been able to trust is a big part of his arc, but I was not excited to have his POV added to this book just to have him and everyone around him spout off more prejudiced victim narrative bullshit every time I flipped to his chapters, like I wasn't getting enough of that from practically every other character in the story.

Most impressive thing: The author draws some really great parallels and contrasts between the 3 main characters and their journeys that I absolutely love. In chapter 2, Nahri says something like "Where's your sense of adventure?" to her new friend and then literally in the next chapter Ali says "Have you no sense of inquisitiveness?" to his new friend. (I don't like to call ships that early in the story, but I was like- these two are fated to be best friends if not something more.)  A bit later in the story, Dara is presented with a choice: to do the easy thing or to do the Right thing, and he chooses the easy path even though he knows that it's wrong. After this, Ali is presented with a choice: to do the easy thing or the Right thing, and he does the Right thing, even though he knows that it ultimately probably won't help. I just really love that this story always feels like every narrative POV and every chapter fully develops the character and contributes to the world. 

I also really love the twists and turns that Ali and Nahri’s relationship has taken over these first two books. They really have grown as individuals, and have believed the best and worst of each other, and understand each other in a way that is a great foundation for a truly lasting friendship (which is, of course, the best bedrock for building a more intimate relationship).

 EMPIRE OF GOLD

Favorite character: Sobek. I have a soft spot for unrepentant murderers who have a soft spot for the people they find interesting.

Least favorite thing: It ended? I know this book was long enough to be an entire trilogy on its own, but I would have loved more at the end from the side characters. Like, I want 100 more pages just about Jamshid and Muntadhir. I was explicit confirmation of what Zaynab and Aquisa are up to, and a sequel trilogy about their adventures. I want more about Fiza and what her plans are for the future. I want orchard shenanigans with Mishmish. I want more about Sudha and her family. I want more about Nahri conning everyone into making a functional government, and I want more about the trials of everyone in the city learning to not hate and judge as a first reflex. Just MORE!

Most impressive thing: Overall I was just impressed with this entire book. If I had to pick one thing, I would probably say I was most impressed, and pleasantly surprised, by Dara's ending. By this point in the story, I was certain that Dara had transgressed every transgression that it was possible to transgress, and lied to himself the entire way, only deciding upon the Right course of action when it was exactly 2 minutes too late, so I was prepared for him to find Redemption in Death. But once again I was pleasantly surprised at this story's refusal to follow popular story tropes, when it instead granted him true freedom as he perhaps had never known in his life, and the ability to choose who he would live that life in service of- choosing to help those who, like him, had been victims of the ifrit. 

I want more stories like this, about characters who are unforgivable, but who are forgiven- not by people or by those they have wronged, but by the narrative itself. Who are able and allowed to rededicate their lives to something, choosing to see their own actions and commit to helping people instead of just blindly following.

 OVERALL

Favorite character: I want to say Nahri, though I also really appreciate Ali and his quiet growth from being naive and kind of annoying to a man who is finally comfortable with and understands himself. But I think I’m going to have to choose Jamshid. I really like characters who are honest with themselves about their motivations, and I really admire his willingness to be open to change, to having his entire world and beliefs be turned upside down and try to go with the new way of being instead of holding on to the past, to confess his sins and be honest with Nahri, to believe in the people he knows rather than in what others say about them when Manizheh tries to manipulate him, to have been through everything he's been through and still retain a sense of humor and a generally upbeat personality.

The author does a good job of presenting all of the characters as fully rounded people so that there isn't really a character that I find poorly written. I definitely disagree with a lot of characters, and dislike them as individual people, and Manizheh comes the closest to being someone I truly hate, but you can see the paths that brought these people to be who they are. There are some great lines- where I think it's Nahri who notes that Ghassan's father make him like he was by his abuse, as he had twisted Manizheh  up with his own abuse, and that Muntadhir could have easily become just like his father. All people have the potential inside of them to be good or to be evil, and they are formed by the circumstances of their lives, the choices they make, and the power they give to the relationships they have.  I also loved that, once she learns the truth about her parents, Nahri notes how much of herself she gets from her Egyptian mother, just as much as she got her Nahid heritage from Rustam, and that it's a part of her that she can be proud of and celebrate.

 Most impressive thing: I don't like "realistic" fantasy, where lots of people die, because that tends to be an excuse for the book to just be really depressing. This story really surprised me by being realistic but in a way that was still full of hope. Sometimes people are terrible, or they are broken by the world and can no longer see anything beyond their pain, and a lot of the time the institutions we have created are terrible and are built on terrible things. But there is still always a need for people who do the right thing, who stand up for those who are being treated unfairly, who are willing to make sacrifices to break down the "us" and "them" that divides people. Who are willing to see change not as something to be feared but as a beautiful potential.

Least MOST favorite thing:  As Chakraborty herself notes in her afterward:  "There are days when it feels silly and selfish to spend my days crafting tales of monsters and magic. But I still believe, desperately, in the power of stories. If you take any message from this trilogy, I hope it is to choose what's right even when it seems hopeless - especially when it seems hopeless. Stand for justice, be a light, and remember what it is we were promised by the One who knows better.

“With every hardship comes ease."

I also believe in the power of stories, and I’m so excited to have been able to experience this one.  <3

[reinabeestudio]

To celebrate Valentine’s Day, I wrote a humble one-shot featuring Phantom Thief Karamatsu and Detective Shinshia, inspired by the Phantom Thief set from Hesokuri Wars lol.

It is very simple, and I did it just to cater myself LMAO. But maybe some of you find it cute✨. As a small fact, I titled the story “Alone Together”.

Story under the cut!

Finally, February was here! Heart-shaped decorations in every store, roses of different colors were seen over different parts of the city, cute sweets… last but not least, there was the romance. For a long time, this was a sour month for the sextuplets. They were phantom thieves of renown, yet they never got a single chocolate in their whole lives by their fans! It was truly demoralizing, almost as bad as Christmas.

Tradition said that women were the ones that gifted chocolate for the men they had chosen. This year, however, the blue phantom thief had a mission. An important gift to give.

Karamatsu tried so many times in the past to convey his feelings to the new detective: Shinshia Doremi. She acted rough and distant at first. “We are enemies,” she declared coldly. But in the rare moments they could spent together, her behaviour softened and the real Shinshia Doremi was exposed: a warm, yet shy girl. Sadly, everytime he tried to tell her about what he felt, someone or something would interrupt their moment together. Often their separate duties, as detective and phantom thief. 

Oh, Cupid, how cruel was he! Keeping the hearts of this couple in the scale of Lady Justice, its pans so close but never together! Such a tragic fate!

Well, perhaps the vision he had of their love inside his head had evolved into something more dramatic than what it actually was in real life. But it added some excitement to whatever their situation was.

Karamatsu was no fool, either. He knew there were others interested in the girl… Mostly, his boisterous, shitty eldest. He noticed the way that idiot looked at her, and it wasn’t love. At least, not the the type of love he felt inside. The blue thief decided it was time to strike while he still had the chance, and ask her out. Subtly.

⊱ ────── {.⋅ ♡ ⋅.} ───── ⊰

Once more the young detective ended up being one of the few remaining people in the department. Rookies got so much paperwork, it was just ridiculous. She had to keep a dictionary close to her, too. Some of these characters looked like an amalgamation made of nightmares.

To keep boredom away, Shinshia started singing, the words echoing throughout the empty office. A soft duet, the name of which she could not call to mind at the moment. However, she did remember that it was a popular love song. It was one of the first songs she heard when she first arrived to Japan.

The sun goes to sleep once more

In this lonely time, I wonder

Is your heart dreaming of me?

The detective finished with the paper she had in front of her, and grabbed the next one in the pile. “How tedious,” she thought. She kept singing to herself.

Stars twinkle above our heads

And the moon gives us her best glowing smile

But tonight, I’ll be yours...

“... And yours alone.” 

Another voice joined in with her song, singing along. Shinshia went silent and turned around, but she saw nothing besides empty desks. She went back to her paperwork, along with her song.

However, before she could sing another word, Shinshia stopped entirely when suddenly a pair of hands covered her eyes. “Who is it?” a familiar male voice asked in a sing-song tone.

“The sweet release of death, I hope.”

She resumed her work when she regained her sight as the infamous phantom thief, Karamatsu, casually leant against her desk with a subtle smile. “Long day, I presume.”

“You have no idea,” she sighed and tucked her hair behind her ears . “You should leave before someone sees you. Unless you want me to handcuff you.”

Karamatsu laughed quietly. “Heh, being helpless at your mercy sounds like a very tempting offer, darling. ” Shinshia’s face immediately flushed and he laughed again, genuinely. “But I am here to steal you away.”

“Steal me away?” Shinshia asked, not even looking away from the papers. She put some loose locks of hair behind her ear again. She was often pulling hair away from her face lately. “Sorry Karamatsu, but I have a ton of paperwork left to do. I can’t be stolen right now.”

“C’mon, Shia-chan! It won’t be for long. I’m just asking you to take a break.”

“I told you, I’m busy right n-”

The phantom thief put a hand over the paper she was writing on, and the scowling detective finally looked up at him. It was in that moment when she noticed that he was wearing casual clothes, and not his usual garish outfit filled with blue glitter. The only part that did stand out was, perhaps, the black eyepatch on his left eye. He felt triumphant over this, how she looked at him.

“Tonight, be mine alone ♪.”

After a minute of silence and a staring competition that was perhaps getting a bit too intense for the situation, Shinshia got up from her desk grumbling. “Fine. A short break.”

With a triumphant spring in his step, he suddenly scooped her up in his arms effortlessly and left the office. His plan was working so far.

⊱ ────── {.⋅ ♡ ⋅.} ───── ⊰

Now this was strange.

Karamatsu dragged Shinshia out of the office. That was not the strange part, but instead of avoiding crowded places like he always did, they just… kept walking. Out in the open. Walking didn’t bother her, it was just unusual. He was a famous criminal, after all. It was a miracle they left the building so easily. Or maybe the author was just too lazy to think of something smart.

Wait, author? What author? That makes no sense. Just ignore it.

It was snowing outside. Snow wasn’t common where she was from, so she still marvelled at the sight of it everytime. Despite how much she enjoyed watching the snow fall, it was still cold in the streets. So smart was she, that she forgot to grab her jacket before they left, and now she was constantly rubbing her hands together.

Karamatsu laughed. “You’ll end up setting them on fire, Shia-chan.”

Shinshia snorted. The comment was lame, yet she snorted, like the fool she was. Karamatsu took her hand on his own and blew on it, before he decided to put both of their hands inside his coat pocket. She glanced at him, noticing that he was actually doing the same at her. However, as soon as he noticed her eyes on him, Karamatsu quickly looked away and instead focused on the cars that passed by.

After spending their evening with an impromptu stroll, they finally headed back to the building. Karamatsu spent most of the time silent, which was even more unusual that this whole situation. Usually, he loved doing long monologues filled with inscrutable flowery words that probably sounded cool only in his mind. But during that evening, Karamatsu seemed focused in whatever was going through his head at the moment. Then again, Shinshia didn’t talk much herself.

The poor detective couldn’t help it! He was a man that had to be put behind bars for his crimes, she knew this. However, everytime they were together, her mind just stopped working properly. This had been happening since she actually caught him once: Karamatsu, one of the six-colored phantom thieves that stole valuable pieces of art all around the city. He was pretty popular among the youngest members of her department, some of them even called themselves his fans. That was done in secret, of course.

Shinshia knew little about the man next to her. Truth be told, she wanted to unveil that air of mystery around him by herself. Not as a detective, but as… something else. Maybe as a friend. Or maybe as something deeper. Only the author knew.

Hold on, what-- you know what, nevermind that.

First she thought, maybe she was just starstruck. After all, as soon as she arrived to that building, she was assigned to the case of the phantom thieves. Shinshia was in a country that was so different  to her native Spain, and she knew no one, besides this guy. A criminal. But he kept coming back when she was alone, giving her advice and listening to her troubles… And then a bond bloomed between them. So sudden, yet so natural, as if it was destined to happen.

“Shinshia,” Karamatsu called to her softly, pulling her from her thoughts, “I have a little present for you.”

“A present? Why?”

“Just a little something I got for you! It’s fine, I promise.”

Shinshia sighed. “Well, fine.”

His eye glittered as he clasped his hands happily. Gosh, what a big baby. “Good! Close your eyes, and don’t open them until I say you can, understand?” He said that last part in English, for some reason.

Strange request, but Shinshia did what he told her anyway, and closed her eyes. She could hear Karamatsu fumbling with something- not sure with what, but it was small, she supposed. He did say it was a little something, after all. Suddenly, she felt his hands on the sides of her head, playing with the locks of her hair. He put them back, and then she felt those same hair locks being slightly pulled back by something. She feels his warm hand linger on her chin, delicately caressing along her jawline before pulling away.

“Open your eyes.”

Shinshia opened her eyes, feeling really curious about what Karamatsu did. He took out a round pocket mirror and then he showed her: a blue hair bow was holding back her hair.

Karamatsu smiled at her softly. “Your hair is growing long, Shia-chan. It keeps getting in front of your eyes, doesn’t it?” She nodded, impressed. When did he notice her annoyance at her hair? It was such an insignificant detail. “Now I can see your cute face again.”

Shinshia looked down, feeling her face warm up. “T-Thanks.”

After he put the small mirror back in its place, he took an envelope out of the same pocket. He gave it to her. It would have looked like a normal letter, if it wasn’t for the small heart on the back… And the blue glitter. So painful.

“What is this?” Shinshia took the envelope and opened it. Inside there was a single piece of black paper with text in gold letters. “An invitation?”

“Observant as always! It’d make me very happy to see you there.”

“I’m not sure, Karamatsu… this is very sudden.”

“But, Shia-chan! It will be so much fun!” Karamatsu looked at her with puppy eyes. Uh, eye. “Do it for me. Please?” 

How was that working so well, what the hell. Shinshia sighed in defeat. “I will think about it.”

Feeling victorious yet again, Karamatsu took her hand and kissed her knuckles. “Good night, Shia-chan. I hope to see you there.” Those were his last words before he turned around and walked away, quickly melting into the crowd. Now Shinshia Doremi was left alone at the doors of her workplace with her heart beating incredibly fast.

The detective looked down at the sparkly envelope. This thing was so shiny that it hurted to look at it for too long. It was so painful! It was so tacky!

“You're so troublesome.” she said to no one. She released a deep sigh.

She was in love with the blue phantom thief called Karamatsu.

Shinshia decided to attend to the party, after all.

She didn’t go to parties often… mostly because she wasn’t invited to any of them. But, if she was being honest with herself, the promise of meeting him again was too tempting to resist. Also, free food and drinks.

Woah. She really had to have a deep crush on the man of strange monologues, if she was going to ignore her insecurity just for him. What a guy, he was making miracles happen even when he wasn’t present.

So she got ready, donning the prettiest dress she could find inside her closet. She wore the blue bow he gifted her, and after checking herself in the mirror, she grabbed her clutch purse and left to the party.

“Even if Karamatsu isn’t there, it’s better than to be alone during Valentine’s day,” she thought as she locked the door of her house behind her.

⊱ ────── {.⋅ ♡ ⋅.} ───── ⊰

It was a Valentine’s dance party. It should have been obvious, considering the day it took place. But she wasn’t aware that Valentine’s Day parties existed at all. Of course they do, why wouldn’t they? Maybe the host was single as hell, and this was their attempt in trying to find a partner. Or maybe it was a Jay Gatsby trying to find their Daisy Buchanan. Yikes, hopefully not. 

Also, every celebration needs a party, obviously.

Somewhere, someone in the world will throw a party for Cat Day. Maybe they will put a silly little hat on top of their cat’s head, followed by the confused pet trying to swat it away with its little paws and failing as the owner was in the floor laughing to tears.

That turned to be a very amusing thought, after all. It’d be so funny if someone celebrated Cat Day like that. She didn’t even know if Cat Day existed at all, but now she really hoped that it did.

Back to reality, Shinshia grabbed a glass from the nearest table as she looked around, moving between the many guests that were having fun together. Where in the world was Karamatsu? How could a single man wearing a black eyepatch be so difficult to find among so many colorful outfits? Pretty sure his full name was Karamatsu Sandiego. A famous thief whose signature look features a blue, glittery matching top hat and long cape. Of course, it all checked out, she just solved the case.

The detective was so into her own dumb line of thought that she didn’t notice the carpet, and her shoe caught. There was barely time to react; carpet veered up, her drink tipped forward, and suddenly the floor was very close. Extremely close. However, she hadn’t bit it, and that didn’t quite make sense. Gravity existed, and through gravity, she should have hit the floor.

There was something holding her up. A hand, which connected to an arm, which led all the way to a well-tailored suit. A delicious, familiar fragrance reached her nose.

“Well now,” a voice purred so slowly, and hands turned her to face upwards. Karamatsu’s face slowly turned into a tender smile. “I see you decided to come after all, darling.”

“Ah, well…” Shinshia really couldn’t say much with her waist held so enticingly by those hands, as warm hands brushed up against her skin and tickled. “I... I had to make sure that you didn’t steal anything! There are many people here wearing valuable jewelry, I’m sure you’d manage to steal something.”

“Heh, it seems my plans were ruined by the great Shinshia once more!” Karamatsu continued onwards with that smile just deepening at her sight, and somehow, he seemed to be leaning a bit closer. The room rang with cheery laughter, and the party carried onwards without a single glance towards the thief and the detective.

“You always seem to be,” one hand caressed its fine way up to her shoulder, “Stumbling around me. I’m starting to wonder if you are tripping on purpose now, hmmm?”

He knew well she wasn’t doing it on purpose. But before she could complain about that, he pressed a finger to her lips, silencing her completely. The hand on her waist pulled her just a little closer that she could feel the warmth radiating from him. He laced his fingers with hers. “I enjoy our moments together, darling.”

The orchestra struck up a mesmerizing waltz, and Karamatsu’s eye perked up enough that Shinshia could practically see the lightbulb above his head.

“Let’s dance!” he invited her without a second thought, and Shinshia stumbled as Karamatsu guided her to the dance floor. A violin hummed and a key plucked, and then his hands were on her waist, a smile beaming away. 

Unexpectedly, he was good at the waltz. What the hell, that was not fair. Shinshia found herself tripping quite a lot, and the phantom thief just chuckled everytime she crashed into his body. It didn’t seem to phase him either, he just grinned all the wider and adjusted until she fell back into rhythm. 

Finally, somehow the rhythm came to Shinshia. Maybe it was the guiding steps of Karamatsu. Maybe it was the smile he gave her as she fumbled along. Or, perhaps, it was the hand he still had on her waist, caring as it kindly led her along despite her inexperience. Whatever it was, it had her steps synchronize with Karamatsu’s, and suddenly she started noticing other things: how his rings glistened in the light as Karamatsu led both of them through the swarm of couples, or how his brown eye never looked away from her face. Small details, yet they were such lovely little things that made her heart beat wildly inside the detective’s chest.

“Say, Shinshia.”

“Yes?”

“You said you came here to make sure I didn’t steal anything, right?”

Shinshia raised an eyebrow in confusion, but she nodded. Where was he going on with this? Was he actually going to do that? She told it as a joke, she didn’t want to work tonight.

“Heh, well, my beloved Shinshia... ” Karamatsu leaned down slightly and whispered. “I believe I already stole something.”

Shinshia didn’t really notice the song grew faster until a violin screeched in delight and suddenly Karamatsu was really close. When the song was over, he had dipped her just as the last violin ended with an exaggerated flourish. 

Karamatsu leaned forward, his lips brushing hers, and perhaps it hadn’t been such a bad thing, tripping over her own shoe. Not when she could feel him gaze at her in rapt adoration. Not when Karamatsu had her so lovingly wrapped in his hands, and clutching as if she was the most fragile, most precious thing in the world that had happened to him.

No, perhaps it was for the best.

[sailorbadger]

Book Review - 6 modern female-led Robin Hood adaptations

In the past 8 months or so I have read/watched/listened to over 30 different Robin Hood adaptations. Over the summer I found myself reading almost exclusively adaptations that were written by women and centered women in the story one way or another. (I also found out that “lesbian Robin Hood” is a whole genre on its own.) I decided to write short reviews for 6 of these books since I know I have followers that probably share my enjoyment of this particular niche. 

This post includes spoiler-free reviews for the following books

Outlaw and Scarlet by Niamh Murphy

Nottingham: The True Story of Robyn Hood by Anna Burke

Hood by Jenny Elder Moke

Marian, Princess Thief by C.K. Brooke

Heart of Sherwood by Edale Lane

The rest of the post will be under the cut since this is quite long.

Despite the fact that I read other books that could technically fit this same category, I decided to focus on these six in my review because these ones are easily accessible to most of my audience (meaning that they are in English and new enough - the oldest one being from 2018 I think - so that you should be able to find them easily). 

I tried to keep these reviews relatively short and spoiler-free. That means that describing specific plot points is impossible because in most of these, the basic premise is the typical Robin Hood origin story. I tried to focus on my general feelings about the books and the characters and their relationships. 

I won’t be doing any numerical ratings. I know that the order in which I read these impacted on how I felt about them. If I had read them in a different order, I would probably feel differently about some of them. That’s why it’s difficult for me to give any real ratings. The reviews are not in any real order either, apart from my favorite being the last one.

These reviews are also about 75% serious and 25% not serious. When my friend and I started to go through all these different Robin Hood adaptations, we made a bingo card that features tropes/themes/details found in a lot of different versions of the story. I’ll leave quick comments on the reviews on how each of these did, but I won’t go too much into detail on those.

Niamh Murphy: Outlaw & Scarlet

I grouped these two books together because they are the first two parts of a series. My understanding is that the author does plan on eventually releasing more, but since Scarlet was released this year, it might take a while. If a third book does come out, I might read it, but I’m not in a hurry to reread these two.

Outlaw tells the story of how Robyn, the daughter of a baron, ends up becoming an outlaw. If you are familiar with at least a few Robin Hood adaptations, you will know how it goes. There are no big surprises, but I suppose the purpose of this story is to introduce us to the characters and set the scene for the later books. Scarlet continues Robyn’s story and introduces a new character to the story. (I won’t go too much into details on the second book to avoid spoilers, since its plot does not follow familiar beats as much as the first one.)

Besides the books on this list, I have also read/watched/listened to several other Robin Hood adaptations as well, and when it comes to plot, Outlaw lands in the “uninteresting” section. There was nothing new or exciting there, and seeing that I have spent most of the year in a Robin Hood -bubble, I was left wanting more. Scarlet was a slight improvement seeing as Outlaw was mostly a very generic Robin Hood origin story. Together they still feel like this is just the beginning of a longer story, so I hope that if a third book comes out we get into the real action.

Outlaw is marketed as a “lesbian retelling” of the Robin Hood story, but compared to some of the other titles on this list, I was left wanting more. The romance aspect is barely there, so if you’re going to pick these up for Robyn and Marian’s relationship, prepare for slow burn. 

The characters didn’t leave a huge impression on me. I do have to say that the Sheriff’s wife was interesting and I wish we had gotten more of her. Other than her, I felt that at times many of the characters could have been from any adaptation. 

Overall, there wasn’t anything really wrong with these books, but they just didn’t entertain me as much as the others. I feel that if I had read these before all the other ones on this list, I would have enjoyed them more. Outlaw and Scarlet are a good read for someone who wants a basic Robin Hood story with a lesbian lead. I still think that marketing the first book as a “lesbian retelling” is setting unrealistic expectations for some, but I hope that in the future the series really earns that title.

I completely forgot to fill out a bingo card for these two and at this point I have forgotten many of the details so unfortunately we’ll never know the result. Most of the tropes hit were so general they probably weren’t on our card anyway.

Anna Burke: Nottingham: The True Story of Robyn Hood

Out of all of the books in this list, Anna Burke’s Nottingham is perhaps the most explicit in its queerness. Although the story obviously doesn’t use modern labels, I would say that it includes representation for (at least) lesbian, bi and trans character(s). None of this feels too out-of-place, and instead Nottingham offers a (mostly) historically accurate Robin Hood tale with a queer main cast.

The plot mostly follows your typical Robin Hood -formula: After a hunting accident, Robyn becomes an outlaw, surrounds herself with loyal friends and helps those in need. This aspect of the book doesn’t offer any new ideas or challenge the existing ideas about Robin Hood as a story. However, it focuses more on the characters, so it doesn’t really need anything new. Marian especially has to come to terms with her feelings towards Robyn and women in general. I do have to say though, that the romance between Robyn and Marian happens a little fast - they only meet a few times before falling in love. [Insert joke about lesbians moving too fast here] It didn’t bother me too much, but I do wish there had been a little more buildup. 

From this list, I read this book the most recently. It may be that I was just so burned out from reading all these Robin Hood -stories but I didn’t connect with the book that well. I enjoyed it, but I wish there had been more of that fun sense of adventure I look for in these stories. 

I would recommend Nottingham to anyone who wants to read a story that manages to be historically accurate and use the Robin Hood mythos to its advantage while not shying away from its portrayal of queerness. Although it did not hold my attention as well as some of the other books, it is still written well and has a good story.

This book didn’t get a bingo unless you interpret “lähentely* which is uncomfortable for the audience” as the sex scene (there is sex in this book but nothing that explicit, I would say high T/low M in Ao3-ratings) being uncomfortable for the reader OR the third person in that scene being uncomfortable. About half of the bingo card was still filled.

*I couldn’t come up with a good translation for this word, it means something along the lines of making moves/coming onto someone/making advances, though for this bingo I use it to generally mean anything flirty/intimate/sexual/etc.

 Jenny Elder Moke: Hood

This book was the first one on this list I read. Compared to the other novels, I would say that Hood is the least like your typical Robin Hood story. The book follows Isabelle, Robin and Marian’s daughter, who has to find her father in order to save her mother. The adventure is brand new, though there are still familiar characters and the basic concept of Robin Hood is honored. This is a story about the next generation of outlaws, so if you’re looking for something that focuses on characters from the legends, you may be disappointed.

Speaking of the characters, I loved Little, Patrick and Helena. I could have just read a book where this group of young outlaws has adventures and been satisfied. Unfortunately I didn’t connect well with the main lead, Isabelle, and the love interest, Adam, felt like a very generic hot guy from a YA novel. The romance itself is practically non-existent, and honestly I could have done without it. Seriously, I had completely forgotten about that whole thing until I started writing this review. This story is more about Isabelle’s relationship with her parents, which I like. She also gets to build genuine friendships with the other characters. I just wish the book had been a little longer so that it could have spent more time developing some of these relationships.

Had I read this book when I was a teenager, I most likely would have loved it a lot more. It is YA, and at times it really shows. As far as Robin Hood stories go, I generally enjoy the “outlaws being outlaws in the forest” content the most, and unfortunately this featured surprisingly little of it. It still offered its own take on what could happen after the legends everyone knows, even if it doesn’t add much to the legends themselves.

It is important that I mention here that if Allan has a child in an adaptation, this child must be named either Allan jr. or Alana. This book fulfills this basic need for me and I am satisfied. It also checked most of the boxes on the bingo, and I almost filled the whole sheet. So somehow, despite not really following the typical Robin Hood formula, Hood managed to include all the important tropes.

If you are a teenager who enjoys Robin Hood -stories, I would definitely recommend this book. It’s not the best YA novel out there, but it’s a good standalone story. I think that for adults, this can be a good read if you are a fan of Robin Hood -stories and/or enjoy this type of YA anyway. I wasn’t sure what type of book this was when I started reading, but if you just prepare yourself for a fun adventure aimed at young teens, you can enjoy this. It’s very quick to read, I think I read it in one day.

Also, I must quote a review I saw on Storygraph (imagine this is in all caps) : “hjsxhfjsdksfjk???????????? Patrick best character no cap”

C. K. Brooke: Marian, Princess Thief

In Marian, Princess Thief, Robin Hood doesn’t exist at all. Instead the story follows Marian, who in this version is a princess, who escaped an assassination attempt and is now living in the forest as an outlaw with six other women - the genderbent versions of the Merry Men. Eventually there is a romance in this book as well, but the biggest force carrying through the book is the friendship between the women. If I had to describe the novel in just one word, I would say it’s lovable. If I had to describe it in two, I would say it’s dissappointingly heterosexual. 

Maybe the fact that I found a genre that is basically “lesbian Robin Hood” has ruined me, but how can you write a story that features seven women living in the forest as outlaws, and not one of them is queer? This is entirely a thing that bothers me personally, and the book doesn’t need queer representation to be good, but there is no reason to not include it. Headcanons can fortunately go a long way, but I’m just saying that you could easily keep everything about Scarlett’s backstory the same except make her a lesbian. (In fact, I’m 98% joking when I say that her not being a lesbian is a homophobic choice. I will elaborate on this if you ask me but I won’t go too much into it here because I would have to explain things about other adaptations as well.)

As for the straight romance, I can’t say that I was feeling it. I could see the points where I was supposed to feel something, so maybe it’s just the fact that I’m aspec myself, but I didn’t care that much about it. Still, it was refreshing to see a story where the romance doesn’t overshadow the friendships between the women, and instead they are valued just as much (if not more) as the romantic relationship. The story doesn’t dig too deeply into the characters, but I still loved all the women. (I don’t care about the male lead. But I know others who would.)

I think the biggest “problem” this book has (apart from not making Scarlett a lesbian) is that the ending feels just a little bit rushed compared to the rest of the novel. I still think that the novel achieves everything it tries to do, but I could have used one more chapter to flesh out the climax.

The bingo card wasn’t even close to being full, but you know what, Marian, Princess Thief is good enough as it is and doesn’t need to follow all the familiar tropes. Still, how hard is it to include a bird?

This was a very quick read, in fact I basically just read it all in one go. I would definitely recommend it to anyone who wants to read something lighthearted and, like me, is often disappointed by the lack of women in Robin Hood stories.

To end this, I will leave you with a translated quote from my WhatsApp commentary: “What is it that in all these Robin Hood stories these old dudes are all after these young maidens like get yourself a hot milf and leave the kids alone”

Edale Lane: Heart of Sherwood

Heart of Sherwood is my favorite Robin Hood -novel that I have read so far. It has just about everything I could want: good characters, a fun sense of adventure, political scheming, great relationships (both romantic and platonic) and a good ending. I was less than two chapters into this book when I knew that this would be a difficult one to top.

The premise of this book is very similar to Burke’s Nottingham: both follow the story of Robyn becoming an outlaw, making friends with the other Merry (Wo)Men and developing a relationship with Marian. I don’t want to compare these two stories too much, but I did prefer the more lighthearted tone of Heart of Sherwood. This was also the first book where I was actually invested in the romance. Normally in pretty much all Robin Hood adaptations, the relationship between Robin and Marian doesn’t interest me greatly; I don’t mind it, but it’s not something I have too many personal feelings about. However, only a few chapters into Heart of Sherwood I thought: “If these two don’t get a happy ending I’m going to jump out of the window.” (I won’t spoil where this threat ended up going.)

One thing I appreciate about the romance in this one is that Robyn and Marian already know each other, so I didn’t have to deal with a romance that develops too fast. The novel also had other things to offer besides being a “lesbian Robin Hood” story, so I didn’t feel like I had to enjoy the romance to enjoy the whole story. I was very invested the whole way through, and out of all the books I’ve reviewed here, this one made me the most emotional. 

As a fan of the BBC show, I do have to say that this novel had a very similar vibe; there was a good balance of action and humor. Maybe that was a part of why I enjoyed this so much. I was also able to predict exactly how certain things would end up. I kind of wish I would have been more surprised. 

This novel is well paced, it is exactly the right length for the story it’s telling and overall I can’t really find things to complain about. If I wasn’t petty, I would give this book full five stars, but because I am petty, for very personal reasons I’m giving it 4,99999… stars. As for the bingo, this one filled most of the sheet.

I’ll end this review with this random line I had shared on WhatsApp for some reason: ""Does this mean I am dead?" Alan asked in jest. - - - "Nay; same annoying jester, alive as ever, and likely wanting for a pint about now."”

Conclusion

Writing these reviews was surprisingly difficult because most of the stories follow the same formula, so commenting on anything that moves away from said formula could be considered a spoiler. Hopefully if you read this far you were still interested enough in at least one of these books and feel inspired to read them. I would happily recommend any of them, and if you want to know my more detailed thoughts on them, feel free to message me. The same applies to all the adaptations I’ve gone through. I have Thoughts that I’m dying to share. 

[terramythos]

TerraMythos' 2020 Reading Challenge - Book 22 of 26

Title: House of Leaves (2000) 

Author: Mark Z. Danielewski

Genre/Tags: Horror, Fiction, Metafiction, Weird, First-Person, Third-Person, Unreliable Narrator 

Rating: 6/10

Date Began: 7/28/2020

Date Finished: 8/09/2020

House of Leaves follows two narrative threads. One is the story of Johnny Truant, a burnout in his mid-twenties who finds a giant manuscript written by a deceased, blind hermit named Zampanò. The second is said manuscript -- The Navidson Record -- a pseudo-academic analysis of a found-footage horror film that doesn’t seem to exist. In it, Pulitzer Prize-winning photojournalist Will Navidson moves into a suburban home in Virginia with his partner Karen and their two children. Navidson soon makes the uncomfortable discovery that his new house is bigger on the inside than it is on the outside. Over time he discovers more oddities -- a closet that wasn’t there before, and eventually a door that leads into an impossibly vast, dark series of rooms and hallways. 

While Johnny grows more obsessed with the work, his life begins to take a turn for the worse, as told in the footnotes of The Navidson Record. At the same time, the mysteries of the impossible, sinister house on Ash Tree Lane continue to deepen. 

To get a better idea try this: focus on these words, and whatever you do don’t let your eyes wander past the perimeter of this page. Now imagine just beyond your peripheral vision, maybe behind you, maybe to the side of you, maybe even in front of you, but right where you can’t see it, something is quietly closing in on you, so quiet in fact you can only hear it as silence. Find those pockets without sound. That’s where it is. Right at this moment. But don’t look. Keep your eyes here. Now take a deep breath. Go ahead and take an even deeper one. Only this time as you start to exhale try to imagine how fast it will happen, how hard it’s gonna hit you, how many times it will stab your jugular with its teeth or are they nails? don’t worry, that particular detail doesn’t matter, because before you have time to even process that you should be moving, you should be running, you should at the very least be flinging up your arms--you sure as hell should be getting rid of this book-- you won’t have time to even scream. 

Don’t look. 

I didn’t. 

Of course I looked. 

Some story spoilers under the cut. 

Whoo boy do I feel torn on this one. House of Leaves contains some really intriguing ideas, and when it’s done right, it’s some of the best stuff out there. Unfortunately, there are also several questionable choices and narrative decisions that, for me, tarnish the overall experience. It’s certainly an interesting read, even if the whole is ultimately less than the sum of its parts. 

First of all, I can see why people don’t like this book, or give up on it early (for me this was attempt number three). Despite an interesting concept and framing device, the first third or so of the book is pretty boring. Johnny is just not an interesting character. He does a lot of drugs and has a lot of (pretty unpleasant) sex and... that’s pretty much it, at least at the beginning. There’s occasional horror sections that are more interesting, where Johnny’s convinced he’s being hunted by something, but they’re few and far between. Meanwhile, the story in The Navidson Record seems content to focus on the relationship issues between two affluent suburbanites rather than the much more interesting, physically impossible house they live in. The early “exploration” sections are a little bit better, but overall I feel the opening act neglects the interesting premise. 

However, unlike many, I love the gimmick. The academic presentation of the Navidson story is replete with extensive (fake) footnotes,and there’s tons of self-indulgent rambling in both stories. I personally find it hilarious; it’s an intentionally dense parody of modern academic writing. Readers will note early that the typographical format is nonstandard, with the multiple concurrent stories denoted by different typefaces, certain words in color, footnotes within footnotes, etc. House of Leaves eventually goes off the chain with this concept, gracing us with pages that look like (minor spoilers) this or this. This leads into the best part of this book, namely... 

Its visual presentation! House of Leaves excels in conveying story and feeling through formatting decisions. The first picture I linked is one of many like it in a chapter about labyrinths. And reading it feels like navigating a labyrinth! It features a key “story”, but also daunting, multi-page lists of irrelevant names, buildings, architectural terms, etc. There are footnotes that don’t exist, then footnote citations that don’t seem to exist until one finds them later in the chapter. All this while physically turning the book or even grabbing a mirror to read certain passages. In short, it feels like navigating the twists, turns, and dead ends of a labyrinth. And that’s just one example -- other chapters utilize placement of the text to show where a character is in relation to others, what kind of things are happening around them, and so on. One chapter near the end features a square of text that gets progressively smaller as one turns the pages, which mirrors the claustrophobic feel of the narrative events. This is the coolest shit to me; I adore when a work utilizes its format to convey certain story elements. I usually see this in poetry and video games, but this is the first time I’ve seen it done so well in long-form fiction. City of Saints and Madmen and Shriek: An Afterword by Jeff VanderMeer, both of which I reviewed earlier this year, do something similar, and are clearly inspired by House of Leaves in more ways than one. 

And yes, the story does get a little better, though it never wows me. The central horror story is not overtly scary, but eeriness suffices, and I have a soft spot for architectural horror. Even Johnny and the Navidsons become more interesting characters over time. For example, I find Karen pretty annoying and generic for most of the book, but her development in later chapters makes her much more interesting. While I question the practical need for Johnny’s frame story, it does become more engaging as he descends into paranoia and madness.

So why the relatively low rating? Well... as I alluded to earlier, there’s some questionable stuff in House of Leaves that leaves (...hah?) a bad taste in my mouth. The first is a heavy focus on sexual violence against women. I did some extensive thinking on this throughout my read, but I just cannot find a valid reason for it. The subject feels thrown in for pure shock value, and especially from a male author, it seems tacky and voyeuristic. If it came up once or twice I’d probably be able to stomach this more easily, but it’s persistent throughout the story, and doesn’t contribute anything to the plot or horror (not that that would really make it better). I’m not saying books can’t have that content, but it’s just not explored in any meaningful way, and it feels cheap and shitty to throw it in something that traumatizing just to shock the audience. It’s like a bad jump scare but worse on every level. There’s even a part near the end written in code, which I took the time to decode, only to discover it’s yet another example of this. Like, really, dude? 

Second, this book’s portrayal of mental illness is not great. (major spoilers for Johnny’s arc.) One of the main things about Johnny’s story is he’s an unreliable narrator. From the outset, Johnny has occasional passages that can either be interpreted as genuine horror, or delusional breaks from reality. Reality vs unreality is a core theme throughout both stories. Is The Navidson Record real despite all evidence to the contrary? Is it real as in “is the film an actual thing” or “the events of the film are an actual thing”? and so on and so forth. Johnny’s sections mirror this; he’ll describe certain events, then later state they didn’t happen, contradict himself, or even describe a traumatic event through a made-up story. Eventually, the reader figures out parts of Johnny’s actual backstory, namely that when he was a small child, his mother was institutionalized for violent schizophrenia. Perhaps you can see where this is going... 

Schizophrenia-as-horror is ridiculously overdone. But it also demonizes mental illness, and schizophrenia in particular, in a way that is actively harmful. Don’t misunderstand me, horror can be a great way to explore mental illness, but when it’s done wrong? Woof. Unfortunately House of Leaves doesn’t do it justice. While it avoids some cliches, it equates the horror elements of Johnny’s story to the emergence of his latent schizophrenia. This isn’t outwardly stated, and there are multiple interpretations of most of the story, but in lieu of solid and provable horror, it’s the most reasonable and consistent explanation. There’s also an emphasis on violent outbursts related to schizophrenia, which just isn’t an accurate portrayal of the condition. 

To Danielewski’s credit, it’s not entirely black and white. We do see how Johnny’s descent into paranoia negatively affects his life and interpersonal relationships. There’s a bonus section where we see all the letters Johnny’s mother wrote him while in the mental hospital, and we can see her love and compassion for him in parallel to the mental illness. But the experimental typographical style returns here to depict just how “scary” schizophrenia is, and that comes off as tacky to me. I think this is probably an example of a piece of media not aging well (after all, this book just turned 20), and there’s been a definite move away from this kind of thing in horror, but that doesn’t change the impression it leaves. For a book as supposedly original/groundbreaking as this, defaulting to standard bad horror tropes is disappointing. And using “it was schizophrenia all along” to explain the horror elements in Johnny’s story feels like a cop-out. I wish there was more mystery here, or alternate interpretations that actually make sense. 

Overall The Navidson Record part of the story feels more satisfying. I actually like that there isn’t a direct explanation for everything that happens. It feels like a more genuine horror story, regardless of whether you interpret it as a work of fiction within the story or not. There’s evidence for both. Part of me wishes the book had ended when this story ends (it doesn’t), or that the framing device with Johnny was absent, or something along those lines. Oh well-- this is the story we got, for better or worse. 

I don’t regret reading House of Leaves, and it’s certainly impressive for a debut novel. If you’re looking for a horror-flavored work of metafiction, it’s a valid place to start. I think the experimental style is a genuine treat to read, and perhaps the negative aspects won’t hit you as hard as they did to me. But I can definitely see why this book is controversial. 

[broccolianddandelion]

do you have any new tdbk fic recs??

TBH, Anon, I’ve been deep into SnK lately, so I’m not as current in my tdbk reading as I would like to be. But yes, RECS! I’ve got some great ones. As always, these are fics that I‘ve enjoyed, but YMMV. I’m not making any claims that these are the “best” tdbk fics or anything. Just have fun!

TheConcept of Us (E, WIP) by @castiiron - As per usual, Todoroki reaches upto brush hair away from Bakugou’s face before kissing him back. As per usualthey clean up lazily, Bakugou in charge of rearranging the sheets to a suitablesleeping position. As per usual, Todoroki spends too long in the shower,dripping wet hair onto Bakugou’s warm skin when he returns to slide into bednext to him.

As per usual Todoroki mutters into the static silence. “We can’t keepdoing this.”

And as per usual Bakugou responds.

“I know.”

I’m taking a risk and including a fic that hasn’t beenupdated/finished in almost two years. But this is my favorite kind of TDBK –when their broken edges can’t seem to align no matter how much the two men try.This is one of those fics where Bakugou and Todoroki keep breaking each other’shearts, yet they can’t let go of each other. Here’s hoping the author decidesto return to the fic someday. I LOVE THIS FIC.

DirectWould be the Best Approach (E, 8.7K) by @bideroo - Would it kill you tobe honest? Apparently, two of UA's most stubborn students think so.

Although primarily known for her humor andrarest-of-the-rare pairs, Bideroo brings a softer touch to this TDBK gem.Bakugou and Todoroki don’t quite know how to telegraph their feelings after ahookup (described in another Bideroo fic -- Well, Who WOULDN’T beCurious?), resulting in them taking a – you guessed it – painfully indirectapproach to getting together. Soft and sweet. (Note: If you usually avoid ficswith an E rating, don’t give this a pass. There’s no sex or violence, and tbh,the author could have easily used a T rating.)

don’tyou go overanalyze (no need to theorize) (T, 3.5K) by @armedetective - Fivetimes someone asked Bakugou Katsuki if he was dating Todoroki Shouto, and onetime Todoroki answered the question for him.

Oblivious!Bakugou at his best.

four times a gentleman (T, 1.4K) by wshxn - i love you, a confession slides from bakugou’s lips, in the curve oftodoroki’s tongue between his teeth one morning. you’ve made me whole again.

I don’t think I’ve ever read a reincarnation fic, and Ialmost never read works that are written in all lowercase, but something aboutthis caught my eye. Each vignette is a teardrop full of love that transcendstime and space.

MyBrother-in-Law (T, 5.3K) by citrussunscreen- Fuyumi isn't sure about Bakugou Katsuki when she learns that Shouto startsdating him. There were still small spots of doubt in her heart even after theygot married. Fuyumi wishes she had learnt much earlier that her worries werefor naught. TodoBaku.

Todobaku as newlyweds living in the Todoroki household.Through Fuyumi’s eyes we see how love in in the details and what it means to bea family.

Pray forthe Wicked (E, WIP) by BakagouKatsuki- Shouto meets Bakugou in perhaps the most unexpected way possible. Which isto say, they meet at a club. Or more accurately in a back alley outside of aclub. Where Bakugou blows someone's head off. Literally. And he is very pissed.Not literally. And maybe that shouldn't be the kind of first impression anyoneshould ever have of anyone. But here they are.

A mafia AU from an excellent writer (I also highly recommendtheir TDBK fic, Hickeysand Doohickeys). Great plotting and dramatic tension. Also features great Todoroki-Yoarashifriendship.

TheRight Buttons (G, 2.5K) by TDRKBKGO- In which Katsuki Bakugou takes a leap and Shouto Todoroki has no idea he'seven supposed to be catching him.

I don’t think I’ve ever done a rec list without includingsomething by TDRKBKGO. I love the way they write Todoroki so much! In this highschool AU series Todoroki is Bakugou’s sempai, and he doesn’t quite pick up onhis kouhai’s not-so-subtle signals until it’s almost too late. This fic givesmy heart joy.

TheSilence of the Yams (T, 5K) by dinosuns- The door closes, leaving Todoroki alone in the one place he has alwaysfelt a little lost in. In Bakugou’s absence, the kitchen seems to have becomemore mysterious and cryptic than before. The counter seems more vast, theutensils are elusive, the drawers harbour great secrets.

Todoroki stares at the potatoes; they stare right back.

--

OR: "What the fuck do you mean you can’t peel a potato?”

If you’re in the mood to LOL, you can’t go wrong withanything by Dinosuns. One of my favorites is The Silence of the Yams. I think Iactually cried with laughter. There’s a scene where Midoriya uses One for Allto hide on the ceiling like some kind of giant spider and it’s, well, you haveto read it.

[mediaeval-muse]

Book Review

After the Wedding. By Courtney Milan. 2018.

Rating: 4/5 stars

Genre: historical romance

Part of a Series? Yes, Worth Saga #2

Summary:  Adrian Hunter, the son of a duke's daughter and a black abolitionist, is determined to do whatever his family needs—even posing as a valet to gather information. But his mission spirals out of control when he’s accused of dastardly intentions and is forced to marry a woman he’s barely had time to flirt with.

Camilla Worth has always dreamed of getting married, but a marriage where a pistol substitutes for “I do” is not the relationship she hoped for. Her unwilling groom insists they need to seek an annulment, and she’s not cruel enough to ruin a man’s life just because she yearns for one person to care about her.

As Camilla and Adrian work to prove their marriage wasn’t consensual, they become first allies, then friends. But the closer they grow, the more Camilla’s heart aches. If they consummate the marriage, he’ll be stuck with her forever. The only way to show that she cares is to make sure he can walk away for good

***Full review under the cut.***

Trigger/Content Warnings: race-based micro aggression, implicit slut shaming, sexual content, strong language/swearing

Overview: I don’t think I need to say why I picked up another Courtney Milan book at this point, so let’s get on with the review.

Writing: As always, Milan’s prose gives the impression of simplicity and effortlessness. I think she has a good instinct for when to tell versus show, and I like the way she communicates what is happening clearly and thoughtfully. I also think her pacing in this book was pretty close to ideal - she wasn’t afraid to let emotionally heavy moments breathe, and more exciting “action” (if you could call them that) scenes didn’t take up more space than they had to.

Plot: The majority of this plot revolves around Adrian, our hero, trying to “get dirt” on a corrupt bishop while also balancing his duties to his family and seeking an annulment for his forced marriage to Camilla, our heroine. I’ll talk about the romance below, so for now, I’ll focus on the other aspects of the plot. The annulment plot was rather straightforward in that I think Milan clearly communicated what Adrian and Camilla needed to do. I liked that it wasn’t just “abstain from having sex,” but a whole tangle of things, like obtaining character witnesses, referring to themselves as married, the matter of their social standing, etc. As Milan writes in her author’s note, annulments actually weren’t that easy to obtain, and I’m glad this plot made it clear.

The “getting dirt” on the bishop plot was also understandable. Given that the bishop in question was the one who forcibly married the two, it makes sense how the original mission to uncover his corruption would be tangled up in the annulment plot. I didn’t find this storyline quite as compelling, but I understand why it’s there - more to serve as a frame than the actual “meat” of the story itself.

The family business/china business plot mostly seemed to serve as an external pressure on Adrian, and though it started out as just another source of stress, it became more interesting to me when Camilla got involved with both the the plate designs and the camaraderie of the workers. But though I found it personally uninteresting, I do appreciate why it was there - it gave Adrian an enterprise to focus on, and gives the impression that he isn’t just at his uncle’s beck and call. He’s an independent businessman in England who has an eye for art, which goes against a lot of stereotypes or assumption about Black people in 19th century England, I think.

Characters: Adrian, our hero, is youngest son of a white mother (the daughter of a duke) and a Black abolitionist (from America, I think?). He is confident and kind, inspiring others to be their best selves and displaying remarkable understanding when they make mistakes. Adrian also desires to be acknowledged by his maternal uncle, a rival bishop who shows affection in private but treats Adrian like a servant in public. He wants so desperately to be acknowledged that he lets his uncle take advantage of him, and a large part of Adrian’s arc involves him finally getting the courage to draw the line and put a stop to it. I found Adrain to be instantly likable and sweet, and I think his ability to tackle problems, juxtaposed with his hilarious inability to lie, was quite fun to watch.

Camilla, our heroine, is the daughter of a disgraced earl and has been shuffled around from home to home. As a result, she’s lost contact with her siblings, and has serious abandonment issues, but remarkably, she still has the courage to hope that someday, someone will love her enough to stick around. I like how her personal arc mirrored Adrian’s in a way: while Adrian longs to be accepted by his family, Camilla longs to be accepted by anyone. Part of both of their arcs involve valuing themselves, and with Camilla, it’s especially powerful because she has so little support to begin with (as opposed to Adrian, whose brother Grayson is always there to look out for him). Camilla’s internal thoughts had a bit of a tendency to be repetitive, but I do think Milan struck a good balance between voicing Camilla’s insecurities and acting admirably. In other words, Camilla didn’t come across as clingy or desperate to me, in part because she never sought to *make* Adrian stay with her.

I also very much liked the sibling dynamics in the story. Grayson, Adrian’s older brother, is supportive and always shows concern for Adrian’s happiness, and I liked the rapport between them. Camilla’s siblings are fun to read about; Theresa is a forceful personality who is always clashing with their elder sister Judith, but they love each other regardless. I was incredibly happy when they finally found each other, especially since Camilla’s absence was a major point of pain in the first book of this series.

The antagonists were serviceable in that they weren’t especially nuanced, but I felt that the lack of depth worked because the story wasn’t really about the conflict with them. Adrian’s uncle, for example, is perfectly civil; he’s never outright racist, but makes a lot of remarks that show he is ashamed of his Black family, and constantly puts off acknowledging Adrian because of how it would affect his social standing. I think this was a good move on Milan’s part because it didn’t opt to showcase “how bad things were back then” by using racism as a spectacle. Similarly, the corrupt bishop and his accomplice (Camilla’s former employer) were barely characters in the book, but their purpose was mainly to be the catalyst for Adrian and Camilla’s story. Their corrupt dealings revolved thematically around unjustly punishing “fallen women,” so there was an element of feminist justice as well as racial justice to the novel as a whole.

Other: Readers looking for a steamy, sexy romance might be a little disappointed in this book. Milan is not so much concerned with sensual, rapid seduction as she is with a gradual shift from acquaintances to allies to friends to lovers. Adrian and Camilla’s emotional bond is very much at the heart of this love story, and though they are physically attracted to one other, their sexual interest takes a backseat to mutual support. I did enjoy how each enriched the emotional lives of the other: Adrian gave Camilla the confidence to accept that she deserved to be loved, while Camilla’s fierce sense of hope inspired Adrian while also leading him to expect better of his uncle.

I also liked that Milan wrote a mixed race hero and a bisexual heroine without letting those aspects become the defining features of their characters. While we never really forget that Adrian is not white, he’s also not constantly enduring racist remarks or poor treatment. Instead, Milan shows us how Adrian operates in the world by code switching and adopting an air of confidence so that white people will treat him a certain way. But while those things are present, Milan takes great care to show that Adrian is first and foremost a kind person who perhaps gives people too many chances and trusts too easily, which sometimes gets him in trouble, but sometimes endears him to others. Some (probably white) readers might complain about historical accuracy, but honestly, Black people existed in 19th century England and had jobs other than “servant.” And also, who cares about “historical accuracy” in a historical romance - the point is escapism. Get over it.

Perhaps the only thing I can criticize in this regard is that the focus on both living as a Black person in England and the injustices shown towards women (both in society’s treatment of “fallen women” and in the ecclesiastical courts) are topics worth exploring in detail on their own. Because there was so much going on, I felt like neither topic got its due diligence, but maybe not every novel needs a thorough exploration of these themes. Maybe this is just personal preference.

Overall, this was a delightful read, and I liked it better than the first installment in the series. Milan continues to be my favorite romance author, and I look forward to her next book!

[dearlazerbunny]

Jane Eyre AU (untitled, Ch 1 of ?)

Pairings: Kylo x Reader

Genre/Ratings: Jayne Eyre AU

Words: 4000

Summary: someone requested a Jane Eyre AU and for some reason my brain refused to keep it a ficlet. I have very little written for it so far, but many ideas. Currently also untitled, but if I don’t post it to give me motivation I’m afraid I will never finish it. 

I have always thought that carriage rides were much conducive to thinking. The pit-pat of the horses’ hooves, the gentle crunch of wooden wheels on dirt and cobblestone, an occasional punctuating crack of the riding crop. Such intricate monotony lends itself to the mind wandering where it pleases. I have never been apt at daydreaming in times of stress, so my thoughts as of now tend to list towards the more practical- taking stock of my situation and surroundings, and putting my thinking into orderly, manageable rows.

I come to the conclusion that my current surroundings have never been so nice as this. The carriage is functional, but with plush detailing that whispers of wealth and elegance the likes of which I have never seen before. My seat is cushioned and covered in a soft fabric; the curtains drawn to the sides of the windows are velvet, if my limited knowledge of the finer things in life rings true. The scenery passing outside may as well be a painting on some artist’s easel: green grass dotted with the most delicate flowers wave in the light breeze, topped by a sky bluer than a newborn’s eye. Clouds float by lackadaisically, as though they have all the time in the world to get wherever they might be going to, and one would think you could lie back and wish the world away curled amongst their feathery fingers.

I take a breath and marvel at how easy and light the air is this far from the city. It tastes of honeysuckle and a babbling brook; cotton warmed by sunshine on a summer’s day, sensations I have only read about in books or dreamt of in the dead of night. The hour’s journey has already purged the ash and soot of home from my lungs. Indeed, I find it hard to recall what it was like to not breathe so easily, so intrinsically. The matched pair of horses drawing my coach whinny with pleasure, in time to my admiration of the surrounding lands.

My fingers find the worn handle of my suitcase to clutch. I would be lying if I said I did not feel out of place in such an idyllic countryside. I was born to an industrious cityscape, surrounded by brick and stone, coal and human filth. A place where it is nigh impossible to wash all of the grit out of your hair, or avoid the noise of the bustling crowds. My ears ring with the absence of market chatter and factories clanging in the distance- that harsh dissonance is now replaced with birdsong and the rustling of foliage. I shake my head. How abruptly my life has changed in just a few days.

The notice, written on paper much too fine to be tacked onto the warped message board as it was, called for a governess- full time and live-in- for the child of a master I had never heard of. But as I passed, the address caught my eye. So remote, so far from the city and its struggles, and further still from the war and its efforts that continuously cripple the entirety of the country along with its people. I have no formal training, really, and no specific qualifications that would give me the authority to nurture a child. But I read and write as well as anyone, perhaps better, since the time most women my age spend working in the war factories I in turn spend in libraries and my cozy attic, consuming stories and penning whatever thoughts come to mind. I could teach sufficiently, I think, if the pupil would be willing to listen, and given adequate books on various subjects. So I went home and wrote a response, offering my services, posted it to the address stated with a few coins dug from the bottom of my bag, and prepared myself to wait in cautious optimism.

Imagine my surprise when not even the day after next a letter arrived for me, in the same hand as that illustrious address that first drew my attention. My application- could you even call it that, bare bones and plain as it was?- had been accepted. A coach would arrive for me the next morning.

I suppose in that moment it was a strange sort of blessing that I had little to pack. A few sets of clothes and an extra pair of boots; what little writing materials I had managed to scrounge up the past few years. They all fit easily into my little suitcase, with room to spare. My satchel, in contrast, was heavy and filled to the brim with every book I had ever acquired. I refused to leave any behind- they were hard won and much loved, despite most of them having cracked spines and wrinkled pages. Besides, I supposed any sort of teacher worth their salt would most likely arrive with some sort of collection of novels.

And so here I sit, in a carriage I fear I am contaminating with the dust permanently ground into my clothes from the city’s smog, my meager life packed into only two bags, with no idea what lies ahead other than an address and what I could glean from the handwriting of my new employer- which was not much. I never claimed to be a detective, after all. But the view is more exquisite than I had even hoped for; my worries bleed out of my person and mix into the fragrant air. I think I could survive any assignment set in such a place. Should I, god forbid, find myself beaten and bloodied by a madman, at least my soul will rest in a place with lasting happiness.

I scold myself for being so morbid. How bad could this possibly be?

At this very thought, the carriage creaks to a halt. I risk a look outside the window. The manse before me is stately, with rich brickwork contrasting the pastels of the grounds on which it sits. Vines climb their way up to the second story windows, worming their way into the nooks and crannies that have been weathered away as the years have passed. The lawn and its walkways are generally neat, with only a hint of overgrowth beginning to creep through the cobblestone. Balconies dot the upper-story.

In short, it looks like a fairy-tale; the home of a shut away princess condemned to roam the hills barefoot for the rest of her days, or a faerie house magicked to grow ten sizes, large enough for humans to live in. I am sure the house is far from the most impressive in this countryside- I have seen renderings in the papers of castles that could house all of London within its walls- but this estate holds much more character than those extravagant flauntings of wealth. I can practically hear each brick singing with its own stories to weave and whisper into my ear. My fingers are already itching for my pen.

The coachman opens my door, seeing as I have not emerged myself; too charmed by the villa to move. I shoulder my satchel, ignoring the muscles that strain under the weight of my books, and take my suitcase by the handle. Stepping into the fresh air feels as though I’ve dived into a clear river for the first time. My skin prickles as the breeze winds its way around me and lifts the corners of my skirts; a child wishing to play.

“The Master is expecting you, ma’am,” says the driver, and I nod at him in thanks. Rather than lead me up to the door, he simply sits back on his perch and turns the horses away, trotting back down the path we just traversed. All right then, I suppose introductions are up to me. Shouldn’t I feel anxious, as my boots click along the stone path, carrying me towards this unknown new life? That would probably be the rational response to the complete upheaval of one’s life in less than a week. Despite all that, my heart feels at ease and indeed almost at peace- far more than it ever was in my old home. Perhaps some sort of guardian star has led me to this place, knowing that my destiny, whatever it might be, awaits here.

The door is twice my height, with a carved brass knocker the size of my head hanging in the center. I go to let it fall against the wood, but think better of it. If I am going to live here, I will not put up any ideas of pretentiousness or good breeding, as I have none of that and furthermore no use for it. I shall come just as I am, and they will have to decide if that is sufficient enough for them. I ignore the wrought brass and instead rap my knuckles against the door succinctly, eager to see who or what will greet me first on this new adventure I have stumbled into.

As it turns out, it is a boy. He looks to be around ten to my unfamiliar eye, with untamed hair and sharp green eyes that look at me with cautious curiousness. It is a gaze of intelligence, and he holds himself well amongst the soaring architecture. Despite his size, he isn’t swallowed up by the surrounding space. “Who are you?”

Straight to the point, then. I believe I like him already. “Well, my name Jayne Ruth Linton, though you can call me Jayne if you like. Who are you?”

“Ben.” He doesn’t seem to want to offer any further information as he studies me closely, from my scuffed boots to the bag slung over my shoulder and in my hand. His shoulders sag. “He went and hired another one, then.”

“Beg pardon?”

“You don’t really look like a proper governess though. I guess he’s getting desperate.” Loud footsteps approach from further inside the house, and the boy- Ben- turns to address I would assume the person responsible for them. “I’ve told you, I don’t need a bloody nanny! Can’t you just leave me alone?”

“Benjamin, language,” a tired voice scolds, as though he has done it ten times today already, and then the door opens wider to reveal a tall man with worry lines furrowed between his brow. “You must be Miss Linton.”

“I prefer Jayne, please.” I shift my luggage to the opposite hand and hold out my right to him. “Mr. Ren, I presume?”

For a moment he looks at my outstretched hand as though it is an alien thing come to life. I am about to apologize for overstepping some invisible boundary when he stands aside from blocking the entrance. “Please, come in.”

The second I do, Ben is off, running to who knows where. I suppose I shall find out soon enough. I study his retreating form. He is by all accounts a handsome boy, and though I’m not sure where serpentine green eyes were inherited from in the family genealogy- possibly his mother?- it is clear that his dark curls, his sharp features, and cool gaze come from the man now leading me further into the house. They must be father and son, or otherwise the younger is some outrageous science fiction clone of the elder. I have to keep myself from giggling at the thought.

We emerge into,  by all accounts, a well-loved sitting room. Books and papers are strewn about, along with oddities that might attract a child’s attention and just as quickly lose it. To my relief, the furniture is not gilded and upholstered in finery- the sofas are meant to be sat upon; the coffee table has scratches at the corners. It is far more utilitarian than one might expect from the exterior of the house, but I find that to be a comfort. At least I have most probably not walked into a place where manners the likes of which the Queen uses are mandatory.

“Please, sit.” Mr. Ren gestures to a seat and after relieving myself of my baggage, I do so. He remains standing, pacing the room slowly but efficiently a few practiced times before he speaks. His spine is ramrod straight, his shoulders back, his footfalls heavy and sure. Military, a voice in the back of my mind says, but the assessment doesn’t make much sense- why would a military man of some obvious rank be so sequestered in the countryside?

“I trust your journey was comfortable?” His tone of voice indicates he most likely does not care, but I answer nonetheless.

“Extremely. The coach was very fine, and the weather is excellent today.” He nods, but does not respond, his mind seemingly elsewhere. After a minute of glancing around the room, noting this and that, I clear my throat. “Well, Mr. Ren, I see you are not a man to mince words. Perhaps we should start with your intention on hiring a governess?”

He sighs heavily, and for an instant, despite his posture, I can almost envision the heavy load that weighs upon his shoulders. “Ben,” he says simply, as though that answers every question a philosopher might ever pose. “He is an extraordinary child, and he needs more than just I in the house. I have my strengths, but giving a child a proper education is not one of them.”

“I see. And I take it you have hired help before?”

Mr. Ren nods. “Several. Benjamin can be… contradictory, at times.” He eyes me wearily, as though these few words will already send me running for the hills. “And he doesn’t take to new people well.”

“Indeed, I don’t believe I should be entirely thrilled for a strange woman to be moving into my house.” I rise and straighten my skirt. “Well, then, if you will point me in his direction, I shall make proper introductions, yes?”

Brown eyes take in my face, as though searching for some unseen agenda. But I am apparently deemed satisfactory, because he simply nods and holds a hand out for my case. “I will take your things to your room. It is down the hall from Ben’s- up the stairs and to the left.”

And so while my new employer turns into the depths of another hallway with my things, I part from him in search of my ward. It isn’t hard to find him- scuff marks and crumbles of dirt lead to a well-worn door that has clearly been slammed one too many times for its hinges. I knock lightly on the wood. “Benjamin? It’s me, Jayne. May I speak with you a moment?”

There is a long pause, then some shuffling, and finally the boy cracks his door just a hair, so that I might not see what lies within. His glare is stony. “What.”

“Well, I wanted to apologize for earlier. I did not mean to upset you.”

Benjamin opens his mouth in order to what looks like give a fiery retort, but the words never pass his lips. “A- apologize?”

“Indeed. Might I come in? Only for a moment, then I shall leave you be.”

Many gears appears to be turning in his head- the gleam in his eyes gives it away- but finally he stands back a little, allowing me entrance.

His room is what I might imagine a wizard’s lair should look like. Books strewn across every surface, shoved onto shelves and teetering in giant stacks in the corners of the room. Lamps are strewn haphazardly in seemingly no order. Tinkering projects- gears and oil smudges on the desk, bits and bobs set about like they have been forgotten- dot the room. The small wizard must dance and turn in order to avoid knocking over this or that covering the floor to get to his bed, which mimics the rest of the room in its untidiness. Still, it has a sort of charm about it, or a coziness- a little hideaway from the rest of the world, full of oddities the owner sees loveliness in. It quite reminds me of my little attic, in fact.

Benjamin sits on his bed, cross legged, and shifts a few times to make himself comfortable. It occurs to me that he most likely does not let just anyone into his sanctum. “I’m quite fond of your room, I must say.”

He raises an eyebrow. “Really? You’re just saying that. Everyone else just nags at me to keep it clean or to shelve my books correctly.”

“Often I find rooms like these are indeed organized, but rather than by normal methods, by the owner’s specific and unique standards.” I tilt my head, taking in an oddly shaped pile of tomes under the nightstand. “For example… do you know what books lie in this stack? Without looking,”

“Mostly ecology books. Geology and the like. I was studying the rocks I found by the pond.”

I give him a small smile. “See? So long as you know where things are located, I see no reason to upend your personal space.”

“Hm.” He looks down at his hands, clasped in front of him, and I get a look at his features illuminated in the lamplight. I would guess he is eleven or twelve, certainly no more than thirteen. “Maybe you are different.”

“I can assure you I am, even without knowing what I am being compared to,” I tease, and I am pleased when I am rewarded with a small grin. “Different than…?”

“The others father has hired.” He glances at me, and I can see the worry in his eyes. “They were all horribly overbearing. Never leaving me alone, telling me to do this and that and always exactly their way. And most of them were stupid as well. They never listened,” he mumbles, and his fingers twist.

“Well that sounds perfectly horrible. I can see why you were upset.” Holding up my skirts so I don’t trip, I lithely jump from empty space to empty space on his floor until I can reach the bed. He watches me with razor precision. I have a feeling if I were to misstep, some delicate trust that has been forged would all be lost. And so, I do not fall. Instead, I land next to him and pat my skirt, as though the effort was nothing. “Now then, Benjamin- or do you prefer Ben? I would like to make a deal with you, if you will hear my terms. I think you will find them quite agreeable, but I am always open to negotiation.”

“Ben.” He vaguely gestures with his hand. “Go on.”

“Well, Ben. I have been hired to give you an education. Education is important, even when we must study the things we do not like. However,” I say, glancing around the room, “I can see you have already found more than enough interests that please you, and I am happy to explore them with you as our time allows.”

“Really?”

I nod. “In addition, I promise to always recognize that you are your own person with your own boundaries. If we are going to work together, we both need our space from time to time. I will not encroach on yours if you do not encroach on mine. Does that seem reasonable?”

For an instant, I am afraid I have overstepped, because his face is blank and unreadable. But then, in a moment of sunshine, a smile splits his face, and he holds out his hand as though we have signed and sealed an official document. “I think that sounds perfect.”

The handshake is firm. “Excellent. I believe we will get along famously, don’t you?”

To my delight, he giggles, a happy sound that contrasts with his serious face. “Won’t father be surprised.”

“Hm. Indeed he might be.” I give him a conspiratorial wink. “Let’s see if we can make that a habit, yes? He looks as though he could use a good shock every once in a while.”

Ben dissolves into muffled laughter and steals my heart right in the very same moment.

A/N: I’ve imagined the story in sort of a steampunk era. Their technology and society is more advanced then ours of the eighteenth/early nineteenth century, but they still use petticoats and carriages. 

Jayne is named for Jane Eyre and Catherine Linton in Wuthering Heights

[lawisnotmocked]

BBC Les Mis Episode 2

I’m back with more incoherent screaming (and spoilers) buckle in lads!

Starting again with some quick things!

What even is time anyway? The passage of time is a made up concept invented by the musical.

Font is still laughable :,3

I would!! Die for little ‘Ponine and Zelma!!!

Olivia Colman is an incredible Madame Thenardier!! Definitely one of the highlights of this episode for me!!

I really love the Thenardiers and all the Thenardier scenes! Except! When Thenardier hit Madame T I wasn’t expecting that. It just seemed a little unnecessarily violent? Like, nothing was really achieved by adding it in other than seeing her get hit we can already see that Cosette is in an abusive household and it holds no significance later on either? Yeah wasn’t too fond of that :/

I would die for little Marius :,,) but it was a really weird choice to have Gorges die when he was so young?? Interested to know what Davies is going to do with that now. Are we going to have 7 year old Bonapartist Marius??

Fantine’s letter writer needs to shush no one asked for his damn opinion >:/

Now moving onto My Boys (featuring Fantine too)!

I don’t care what anyone else says about Valjean’s ponytail it’s the cutest thing ever and I love it :,) and his awkward little speech omg that was very in character and also adorable!

After the first 10 minutes things get... ehhhh. Valjean comes across a little bit judgey of Fantine when he interviews her to work in the factory, but sure okay, having the two characters meet isn’t a bad choice they’re establishing the fact that Valjean knows Fantine works for him so he’ll recognise her later.

Can’t deny that Monsieur le Maire is very attractive (sorry had to get that out of the way ^^’) and okay a scene with him handing out coins to children good all still very in character!

I loved the shot of his bare bedroom after the factory girls were talking about it too and lighting the candlesticks that we can see he’s kept too. As of this point no major issues!

Ooh damn guess who comes into the factory next!! The new handsome chief of police here to ask in his lovely deep voice if you prefer to be called Monsieur or Daddy!! (Spoiler he prefers Monsieur le Maire) God this scene!! Once again is so nearly perfect!! There’s the awkward tension and clash of opinion and Oyelowo and West’s incredible acting!! But the dialogue sucks!! It feels so forced!! Please Davies!! You almost had it there!!

Oyelowo’s Javert is so dedicated and fanatical I love him so much god please give this man a better script hhhhhhh :,,)

Okay okay as I’m watching I’m thinking actually the second half of this scene is a little better it flows more easily and Javert’s monologue was actually not too bad.

Oof I hated the implication that Valjean was interested in/attracted to Fantine though. Especially since, again, it served no purpose other than making Valjean seem creepy and making it appear that his later actions were motivated by attraction. Served literally no other purpose wasn’t used again past that point just made everything else Bad. I hate it.

What comes next?? Cart scene cart scene!! And Javert on a horse 👀 I... don’t know if it’s just because I’m making heart eyes at Dominic West and David Oyelowo the entire time but I really liked this scene!! No complaints even the dialogue was pretty good!

The next scene however.... *deep sigh* the next scene....

I... really did not like the choice to have Valjean stand there, listen to Fantine explain herself and her situation in tears to him, and then loose his shit at her and fire her. That’s just. No. Not only is that so incredibly and painfully out of character, but it’s also messing up the entire point of Fantine’s story?? And making Valjean a really dislikable character?? God I just. I hate this scene so much ugh!!

No letter Jav rides straight the fuck to Paris! I don’t know how I feel about this scene? On the one hand... who the fuck is this man the Javert I know would never challenge an authority figure!! But on the other hand I guess it’s kind of fitting for Oyelowo’s Javert? So yeah. Don’t know how I feel about this. I guess I didn’t dislike it but you’re on thin fucking ice Davies and you’re lucky I like Oyelowo’s more dominant Javert.

*deep sigh* Valjean.... buries the candlesticks with his money. What about the symbolism Davies?? What! About! The symbolism! During the scene where he’s supposed to throw them into the fire!!

Valjean and Javert meeting in the street on horseback after both returning from their Highly Suspicious Missions was a Good Scene though I loved that! It made me think of the Awkward Eye Contact Scene in the brick when Valjean is staying in Gorbeau House :p See! The issue is! That most of this isn’t too bad! And some of it is really good! But there’s a few utterly awful things that just ruin the entire episode for me! And that sucks!!

Anyway. I really loved the scene where Fantine sells her hair and teeth I think that was done well! But it was really goddamn sad as well!! ‘Les mis is sad’ says local man who knows storyline :,3

After this I felt like Fantine’s story gets a little unnecessary graphic? Maybe it’s just a personal opinion but it felt a little bit like the scene where Madame T was hit. Apparently Davies can’t write a single female character who isn’t a Tragic Powerless Victim Of Men (Specifically Their Sexual Urges) :/ But again, just a personal opinion I can see how other people might like that scene as a way to show how truly awful Fantine’s life became.

Oookkkayyy Fantine’s arrest. Personally I liked the beginning of this scene! As always Oyelowo was incredible and his Javert was rough (but he did just drag a woman off a gentleman and she was attacking him so I think that’s not an unexpected or totally unreasonable reaction) and dismissive, and I loved Fantine begging him to let her go and then calling Madeleine a monster. Big oof but in a good way. Making me feel feelings.

Javert literally throwing her to the ground felt a little too much? But Davies it Just Like That apparently :/

My main problem with this scene was actually Valjean-who-doesn’t-really-feel-like-Valjean-anymore. What Fantine says about him is all true. We aren’t given any reason to believe he changed at all from the man in Toulon. Instead of Fantine being hurt by ✨society✨ it’s Valjean himself who is the direct cause of her suffering. ( @pilferingapples explains this much better and in a lot more detail here!) Add on the fact that Davies established earlier on that Valjean was potentially attracted to Fantine and this totally messes up his motivation for helping her too and oof I hate it :,) Valjean has been turned into a dislikable character, Fantine’s hatred for him specifically is justified and Javert is becoming a sympathetic character! What did you do to my emotional support dad Jean Valjean Davies?? D:<

Hhhh the scene when Javert asks to be dismissed... it’s good!! The dialogue feels a lot better and Oyelowo is incredible and it’s as tense and dramatic as it should be! Except! It isn’t Javert asking to be dismissed. It’s Javert actually being dismissed. Because Valjean says nothing. No insistence that Javert remain as a police inspector. Nothing. That’s! Not! Jean Valjean! Davies! And how is that even going to work with the storyline is Javert just going to get his job back after Valjean confesses?? Is this the Bad End where Valjean never even goes to Aras and Javert looses his job as an inspector?? What are you doing here Davies?? Uuughh this isn’t actually a bad episode it’s just Valjean’s awful mischaracterisation that’s killing me here!!

To continue the thread of Valjean’s Awful Mischaracterisation, shouting at who I think is Sister Simplice?? Oof.

I know I mentioned the candlesticks being buried in the woods before but. Why?? Valjean has no candlesticks to throw into the fire so instead it’s Petit Gervais’ coin that takes their symbolic place. I know I said I was happy to have Petit Gervais included but that doesn’t mean I wanted his ghost to haunt Valjean and take the symbolic place of Myriel :,,) So yeah. Weird choice but go off I guess??

I still. Am kind of hopeful that perhaps Valjean’s characterisation might improve in later episodes? It’s only episode 2 right we’ve got 4 more to go! But at the same time I’m nervous that It’s Only Going To Get Worse :,) Anyway I’d die for Oyelowo’s Javert and he’s good.

Well there are my Hot Takes on what actually happened in the episode now it’s Animal Symbolism O’clock >:3

The bird symbolism is back baby!! And I really loved the way this was done! The bird is symbolic of Cosette. Working in Madeleine’s factory is how Fantine is able to send the Thenardiers money for Cosette and she makes a little bird while she’s at work. However when the bird is discovered, Fantine is told that if she keeps making things like that instead of working she’ll be fired. Foreshadowing! The discovery of Cosette is what gets her fired. I’m genuinely impressed with this this is some proper complex symbolism!

Bird symbolism can’t save you from your Valjean related sins Davies but Valjean being given Fantine’s jet bird after he fires her can also be seen as foreshadowing for Valjean meeting Cosette, but also a signal that Fantine can’t look after Cosette anymore and won’t be able to go and fetch her like she wanted because she doesn’t have her job anymore. 

There’s also the continued use of wild beast/non-human creature to refer to those outside of polite and civilised society when Javert asks Valjean “you would risk your good name to help a creature like that?” during Fantine’s arrest.

Still nothing to connect Javert to dogs though :/ But I’m still hopeful! Maybe next episode!

[illusionsofdreaming]

So I don't know the difference between a prompt, a headcanon and an imagine... But how about a cute AU where Robin wasn't found by Chrom and made a life for herself as a baker in a village, and Gaius meets her through her shop? Feel free to improve the details of course to make this more enjoyable for yourself :)

Notes: Honestly, sometimes I get confused myself haha the lines that separates imagines and headcannons can blur. But basically imagines are longer, fully written scenarios/flash fictions (so this one is technically considered an imagine request and these) and headcannons are bulletpointed and gets right to the point (these). You can find a better explanation between the differences between these two types of writing I offer in the rules page :’3Anyways. As I was writing this, I imagine that this AU is set after Robin and her mother fled Plegia but before she lost her memories. The imagine was actually several sections longer but then it.. got too long so I just left it at this. :’D Enjoy!

Ft: Gaius

The shop was quiet and empty, peaceful even but you daren’t fall in love with this quaint little village for fear of heartbreak as you knew you’ll have to leave it one day. Constantly having to move and say goodbye was painful but it was a small price to pay if it foiled the plans of your maniacal father who’s hell bent on raising the God of Death itself.

The little village you and mother happened across straddled the borders of Plegia and Ylisse. Since you knew a little of baking, you had offered to help out at the local bakers for some extra gold.

Business was not exactly roaring and rarely do you find new faces visiting the store. Which, considering your situation, was a blessing in disguise as it meant father would be no closer to discovering the whereabouts of his runaway child and wife. The less new faces you meet, the lower the chances were of someone recognizing you or your mother’s face. Perhaps this little village was the sanctuary you and mother have been looking for all along.

You were reflecting on how you could get used to the peace and quiet when trouble and mischief brought itself crashing through the doors. Immediately your hand brushed towards the Thoron by your side but before you could question or even threaten the intruder, the man had all but vaulted over the counter to your side, pressing his back against the thick hard wood and pressing a finger to his lips in the universal sign for silence.

Not a moment later, the door swung wide hitting the back of the wall so hard it rattled the shop.

“Where is he?” The one leading the charge into the bakery yelled.

You resisted the urge to glance down towards the side as you felt a light pressure against your boots. “Who?” You managed pleasantly as you adjusted the strawberry cake on the counter.

“The man with red hair! The candy loving dastard of a thief took all our spoils!”

You frowned, not liking the fact you could be harbouring a thief but hating the temper of the man before you even more. Just when you were musing on the beauty of a peaceful village too.

“Whoever it is you’re looking for it’s clear that they’re not here.” You stated softly.

“What do you have to worry about! We’ll be out of your hair soon enough!” The thug hissed as he jerked his shoulder forward, a motion that seemed to signal to his friends to start turning the bakery upside down.

“All the ruckus you’re causing is bad for the business, I haven’t seen the man enter  and the shop clearly only has one entrance. Your thief’s not here, you should look elsewhere.”

“Or else what?” Big, mean and ugly taunted and immediately got a blast of magic scoring past his face in response.

“It wasn’t a suggestion.” The Thoron tome was out on display now, pages flickering with magic as lightning crackled at the tip of your finger tips.

The bandits seem to understand the threat you pose as all movement ceased. Starting a fight in such cramped spaces would be disadvantageous for the thugs, especially with a counter between the two parties. Your magic would easily take all of them down before they could whip out their swords and cross the barrier.

“This is not the end of things you meddling witch.” the leader spat before turning around and leaving the premises, his two lackeys slinking off following his shadow.

You waited a good ten seconds and then another ten to make sure they weren’t coming back before turning to face the one who started this mess in the first place. “Tell me one good reason why I shouldn’t just turn you over to the authorities right no- Hey! Those are for the customers!” You snatched the plate of half eaten cream puffs from his hands, horrified to find most of them gone.

“Got to give it to ya, those are some of the best pastries I’ve ever had.” the man grinned, licking the cream off his fingers.

“These were for Mrs. Betson! And you ate all of them!” Your face paled, as you picked at the remaining puffs on the platter, realising none of them are salvageable.

“That means you’re making more right? Then excuse me as I finish the res-“ He hissed in pain as you slapped his greedy fingers away and levelled your magic tome at him.

“I knew it! I should’ve handed you over to them, you’re obviously nothing but trouble!”

The thief stumbled back, eyeing the Thoron book nervously - obviously he hadn’t been too busy snacking on Mrs. Betson’s cream pastries to miss your magic show. “Hey, hey, hey Cinnamon, why don’t we all calm down and talk things out yea? You don’t seem like the type to go blasting your guests.”

“You want to test that theory out?” You snapped, wielding your tome high, ready to use it as a blunt weapon. “You crash into the bakery bringing menacing thugs along who stalk around causing a ruckus and threatening to tear down the store.” You took a step forward which the thief echoed with one step backward. “You made me pull out my weapon and make enemies of them who no doubt will be coming back for more and you ate all the customer’s pastries that took me all morning to pipe!” There was a soft thump as the man bumped against the edge of the counter, cornered.

“Is it just me or does it sound like you’re more heartbroken over the buns-“ The thief yelped as he dodged your book in an impressive feat of acrobatics, summersaulting backwards over the counter, efficiently placing some much needed distance between you two. You however was not to be so easily deterred nor have need for such parlour tricks, you simply lifted a flap on the counter and crossed over to the other side, inwardly smirking at the crestfallen expression that came over the other’s face.

“Wait, wait, I know how it looks but I swear on all the sweets I own, it’s really not as bad as you think!”

“That’s rich coming from a thief!”

He scrunched up his nose in offence at your tone. “Believe it or not, even a petty thief like me have morals and follow an honor code too. I don’t steal or hurt the defenceless, women or children. These guys took advantage of a merchant who’s cart had fallen over when its wheel broke. Robbed him blind they did, old man was crying like a newborn babe. Stuff like that just ain’t my cup of chocolate you know? I did what had to be done, return his precious cargo and sent him on his way, even got a pretty sweet tart out of it. But as you can see, Brandon an’ the others didn’t really appreciate it all that much.”

You paused, considering his words carefully. You did hear from the others that a large merchant cart had fallen over on it’s side, blocking the road a few days ago but you have no way to confirm that it’s the same cart this man was talking about. You lowered your tome but your eyes remained locked on the thief’s every movement.

He must have noticed the distrust still in your eyes because the sigh he let out next was tired and exasperated. “Yeesh Cinnamon, you don’t have to give me that look. I get it, I brought them here so I’ll deal with them, make sure they won’t be coming back for seconds. I’ll even throw in one of my precious custard pies for those cream puffs you mourn, happy?” He grumbled as he drew the collar of his heavy cloak up to his chin.

“Fifty gold coins.” You returned sharply, gripping onto the edge of his cloak, holding the man back before he could escape.

“Fif-Fifty?” The thief spluttered and you can hear the sharp crack of his lollipop as he snapped the stick in his mouth. “Are your cakes made of gold? They taste pretty damn amazing I’ll give ya that Cinnamon but fifty gold coins? You might as well take out a dagger an’ tell me you’re robbing me now!”

“Fifty gold coins barely covers the cost of ingredients and labor put into those dozen cream puffs you devoured in less than five minutes flat!” You snapped, tightening your grip around the stretch of fabric you held. “I haven’t even charged you for the physical damage done to the shop or the emotional damage I suffered from having criminals crashing into the store!”

The smile on his face was tight as a muscle underneath the man’s eye twitched. “Yeah, cuz it’s clear handling Brandon and his goons took a real toll on ya.”

You narrowed your eyes at him, not appreciating his sarcasm but neither did you want to bother with explaining your situation to a shifty thief. If wasn’t that you wouldn’t be able to deal with the thugs if it came down to a fight but it would definitely ruin your image as the very average, unassuming new neighbour in town. If word of a powerful mage was hiding in the small village got out, you’ll be forced to leave your home again!

“Deal with your friends and fifty gold for compensation or I’m calling the authorities.”

“Can’t you put it on my tab or something?”

“You’re not even from around here!”

“You drive a hard bargain, Cinnamon! What about two custard pies? I’ll even throw in several honey cakes!”

“Are you going to pay or not?” you growled, raising your tome once more ready to knock the infuriating man out.

“Alright, alright! You win! Take it!” From underneath his cloak he grabbed a small pouch and tossed it at you. You caught the heavy pouch with one hand, releasing your grip on the other’s clothing. “It’s one of my most precious collections and I can assure you that I don’t have anything on me worth more than that! I’ll have you know that you won’t find anything like these on the market anymore! The craftsman retired several years ago and I’m the only customer he still entertains from time to time. Hopefully this will satisfy your greed for now!”

You loosened the string holding the pouch close to peer inside to judge its contents. If the items within were really that precious then perhaps you could sell them to cover the costs for repairs. “Wait a minute.. aren’t these candies?” Your gaze snapped up but it was already too late, the thief had long vacated the store the moment you released him from your grip.

“Dastard! Come back here!”

[linoholic]

Mafia!Hakyeon

Requested:  Hi can u do a VIXX N mafia au?

Warnings: mentions of blood, death and sex but nothing explicit

I am really excited to write this because N is my VIXX bias and nobody can deny that sometimes our concept kings really give off that mafia vibe. 

This is based off of a prompt I remember reading a while ago and after some digging I found where it came from, so shoutout to @fanficy-au for the prompt ideas

Also, for future reference, unsub means unknown subject and refers to the suspect in a criminal investigation. I watch way too much Criminal Minds.

Cha Hakyeon

Also known as ‘N’

Is the leader of mafia group known as VIXX, based in Seoul, South Korea

It is a very powerful group, but not very well known; mainly because they stay out of the public eye so that they can carry on their activities without the police being on their case constantly

And although they of course do illegal things

But their main goal is to take justice into their own hands when the law won’t

When the boss retired, he passed the role on to his youngest son, Hakyeon instead of his older brother or one of his older sisters, who all decided to lead normal civilian lives

This caused some tension among the older members of VIXX who thought he was too young and inexperienced, and that they should have got the leadership role instead

This tension was quickly dissolved when Hakyeon showed his capability when a rival gang had managed to infiltrate their ranks

Long story short; he quickly figured out the situation and tricked the spies into revealing themselves shortly before they would have destroyed VIXX from the inside out

These men haven’t been heard from since

This is where Hakyeon became known as ‘N’ as he changed the fate of the seemingly doomed mafia group

(If you didn’t know, Hakyeon came up with the stage name ‘N’ based of the korean word for fate, in-yeon, and the yeon in Hakyeon also took that form)

From then on, nobody questioned his abilities (outright at least)

He has five people in his ‘inner circle’ not including him who he would trust with his life

These are Taekwoon, Wonsik, Jaehwan, Hongbin and Sanghyuk

And they know that despite he cold, stoic persona he puts on when facing the leaders of other groups, officials or lower ranked VIXX members

He is actually quite warm and dorky

He often acts like a mother 

Which often catches many people off guard when he visits one of the warehouses they own and starts to scold the workers for not dressing warmly enough or not taking enough breaks

Thus the nickname ‘N-jumma’ comes about

Not that anyone except Hyuk actually calls him that to his face

Basically, he is last person someone would think to be the boss of a powerful mafia

He loves to dance when he gets the spare time to do so, and is actually very talented at it

He even made one of the rooms in his large house a dance studio, wall length mirrors and sound system included

When not doing paperwork, bossing people around or dancing he can often be found reading somewhere

And literature is the reason he meets you

Well, kind of anyway

You are an up and coming author, already being praised for your amazing mystery novels

They are clever and not cliche driven with amazing storylines and plot twists that nobody ever sees coming

And it is all going well for you

Until you get summoned for questioning by the police

Sitting in an interrogation room with no explanation as to why you are there

Until a detective comes in and tells you why

It turns out that there is a serial killer on the loose

And they are taking inspiration from your books

And just when you thought it couldn’t get any worse

They tell you that the unsub seems to be obsessed with you; having left notes that he is a big fan of your books and is killing so that your novels get exposure, and they are always signed off with a cursive ‘N’

Which is weird considering you live in South Korea

So that night you go home and try to get some sleep which is hard now you have the knowledge that someone is killing people for you, and that there is a policeman standing outside your door ‘just in case’ the killer tries to get to you

Meanwhile, as you lay in your bed in a restless sleep

On the other side of the city Cha Hakyeon stands pacing his office whilst his inner circle sit, all brainstorming ideas

He has just received the news concerning the serial killings

And it is troubling

He is a big fan of your books as everyone knows

He can often be seen with one in hand and has a shelf in his library solely for them

And apparently knows this and is trying framing him for these murders

There are many people it could be

If he gets arrested for this then that gets him out of the way

And so it could be somebody wanting his position of power

Or a rival wanting to hit VIXX where it hurts, their beloved leader

Of course the police and government know of him and VIXX

But they can never get something solid in order to prosecute anyone because of how they stay so deeply under the radar

But the main thing is that they know that he, Cha Hakyeon, also N

And so whereas before they left him alone because he didn’t cause them much trouble

But now he is a wanted man; for murders he didn’t commit

Knowing the intricate details of the case from one of his inside sources; he knows that you are also involved

And so he decides to meet you

If anyone could find out who was really doing all of this then it would be the person who wrote it all in the first place

And so the next night, he dresses up inconspicuously, and gets Ravi to find your address for him before heading out

Easily sneaking past the police officer stationed by you door and to a window; he climbs through with ease

Turning around he realises he climbed into your bedroom

Which would be fine and all

If you weren’t currently half naked in only a towel and staring at him in shock

Hakyeon’s first instinct is to cover his eyes and turn away like the gentleman he is

You, on the other hand, just got out of the shower after having a long day being interviewed by various detectives

When you got out you weren’t expecting to turn around a see a strange man in your room with you

A very handsome man, yes, and seemingly polite considering the way he averts his eyes from your form

But still a stranger

And so when you get over your shock you go to scream or shout or anything to get the attention of the officer outside

But before you can even open your mouth the man has traveled the short length of your room to you and covers your mouth with his hand

“I swear I am not here to hurt you. I just want to talk and so if you would please keep quiet and just hear me out? I’m going to move my hand now, can I trust you to keep quiet?” he says

You are stood frozen still as he looks into your eyes, a slight pleading look within them and so you slowly nod

And like he said he would, the man removes his hand slowly, making sure you won’t go against your word

He then glances down and realises you are still naked except for a towel and turns red, quickly averting his eyes

And yes he may be a complete stranger who broke into your room and who knows what his true intentions are

But to see someone who looks so intimidating blushing and act like a schoolboy with his crush is sort of....endearing

But you quickly shake that thought out of your head

“Could you, uh, perhaps turn around so I can get dressed?”

A couple of silent and tense moments later you are done changing and you sit down on your bed, eyeing the man suspiciously as he sits down next to you

“My name is Cha Hakyeon. And I am N.”

At his confession you immediately start to panic

“Not that N though! The real N. I’m being framed you see!” he quickly continues, calming you down only the slightest bit

“Remember, you said you would hear me out.”

Not wanting to upset a potential serial killer, you quickly nod your head

And deciding that the best way to make you understand his point of view and agree to help him is to tell the truth; Hakyeon tells you everything

About how he is the boss of powerful Mafia VIXX, about his five best friends, about how he most definitely not the person running around killing innocent people

And you are a writer at heart

You know when things are real and when they are made up

And even though this whole situation feels like it could have come straight out of one of your novels; you can’t help but feel like he is telling the truth

So you agree to help him

Now, Hakyeon can’t keep sneaking past the police stationed outside your door; it’s too dangerous for him as a wanted man

He asks you to join him in his hideout and base of operations

Not his house because it has eyes on it 24/7 in case he returns there

So, making up the excuse that you are going to stay with family out in the country and away from the mess, you go against everything your parents ever taught you as a child and pack your bags and go with him

Over the next week you two stay locked up in his office playing detective

During this time you two get to know each other

You get to know the personality he hides behind the big boss persona he puts on

And in turn he gets to know all about you and your life

You share your favourite foods; songs; colours; animals

You get to see him dance, which is an amazing experience

One day, to ease the stress this whole situation is putting on both of you, you play a game where he has to dance to whatever music you play

At first you choose the usual classical music, then hiphop

But then you start to play kpop songs and wow are you impressed

Never in your wildest dreams would you have imagined a big bad mafia boss dancing to SNSD like it was his own song

You also get to know the other boys

You find the bond between them all so amazing

They are all so close and while they all get on each others nerves, you can see that they would go to the ends of the earth for each other

Because you all become friends in this time, they also start to tease you

Mainly on the feelings that have started to grow for their leader

Sometimes you really question if they are members of powerful mafia VIXX or not

It all gets worse when one night at after a long day hacking into police databases to further your investigation into Hakyeon’s framer, you two fall asleep in his bed together after comparing notes til you both just nod off

And although you fall asleep on opposite sides, you wake up to find your head tucked under his chin and your arms wrapped around his torso

His clothes, the casual wear probably more expensive than your entire wardrobe, are more wrinkled the face of the 96 year old grandmother that lives next to you

Blood rushes to your face as you realise the position you are in

But immediately turns white as you notice that Hongbin and Jaehwan are standing at the foot of the bed, both with obnoxious smirks on their faces

You look back to Hakyeon, and he looks so relaxed in his sleep that you don’t have the heart to wake him which would happen if you moved

So you simply motion for the two males to keep quiet and snuggle back down, making the most of this time to get some more much needed sleep

Neither of you live it down the next day though

You are sure that had it been any other boss then there is no way that the teasing would be allowed

But considering N is a big softy inside he doesn’t do much except scold them, which scarily reminds you of your mother

Finally, a breakthrough in the murder’s is made, and they apprehend the person responsible after an anonymous tip off (yeah, it was you)

Turns out that Hakyeon’s first hunch was correct

The whole thing had been orchestrated by someone with a grudge that had been chucked out of VIXX for being rough with innocent people that the mafia had no qualms with and therefore making a bad name for them

After he confessed to the whole thing, Hakyeons name was cleared

To celebrate, Leo used one of his contacts to book a table at one of the finest restaurants in Seoul

Of course you get invited along

You played a big part in clearing N’s name so even when you denied the invitation, they wouldn’t take no for an answer

And when you tried to use the excuse that you had nothing to wear

Hakyeon presented you with a box that contained an outfit that you are sure costs more than you have earned your entire life; shoes and accessories included

So you had no choice but to go

In the end you are glad you went with the six men because you were in a private room and so had the freedom to drink and laugh as much as you wanted

And it ended up being one of the most fun nights you have ever had

The fact that the food was so nice was only a plus

It’s nearing 11 at night when you all start heading your separate ways

“Now that the whole serial killer ordeal is over, you are free to head back to your own house,” Hakyeon mentions as you arrive back at the hideout

His comment makes you pause in the middle of the hall

You had gotten so used to the being around so many people during your time there that the thought of going back to an empty house and leaving this whole adventure behind felt a little....weird

You had gotten so close to Hakyeon during the times you had spent locked away in his office (get your minds out of the gutter people)

While you knew you weren’t in love; you had only known each other for about 2 weeks after all; you could see yourself falling for him easily

In short, you fancied the pants off of him

Noticing that you weren’t walking behind him any longer, he turns around to face you, only to be met with the feel of soft lips against his

He immediately wraps his arms around you, deepening the kiss, and slowly walks backwards with you, kicking his bedroom door open with his foot

Let’s just say that he really proves to you his dancer’s stamina that night

Come the next morning, everybody knows that you had spent the night in the bosses room

The most used words that day were “about time” and “finally”

From that day forward, you were able to call Cha Hakyeon, the beautiful, bronze skinned god of a man yours

And he called you his

During the hard times, you were there to offer a shoulder to lean on

When he became angry you were the one called in to calm him down as you were the only one not completely scared of him in that state and he would never shout at you

You also write more novels

More romance started to appear in them as well, to the surprise of everyone who had read your previous books

Your best selling one just so happens to be about six good men doing bad things while keeping the bromance alive

And while your life will never be easy or perfect when dating the boss of one of the most powerful mafia

It is totally worth it to be able to go home after a bad day only to see Hakyeon in his expensive silk pajamas greeting you with nothing but love in his eyes

I started writing this and then got sidetracked watching their Weekly Idol episode again so I lost my train of thought in the middle kinda.

I hope you enjoy! As always, requests are open so feel free to drop by my ask box <33 xx

[hillbillyhippiemusicreview]

Post #51–Lance Dubroc, Sunny Days

Do you ever feel like a part of you is missing something? Like something you’ve never known before but you just know you need? That’s exactly how I felt when I first heard Lance Dubroc’s melodic voice on a song he and a good friend of mine co-wrote—I’d never before heard it, yet it was exactly the soul food I had been craving. When my friend played me the song, I instantly told him I had to hear more and to have Dubroc contact me so I could review his record and share it with all my readers, because it’s simply that delicious. So, y’all forget Mama’s collards, cornbread, and black-eyed peas on a beautiful Sunday and dig into Sunny Days for a little nourishment that’ll fill ya right up, every day of the week!

My tastes in music are as eclectic as I am, as are the artists I review for this blog. Dubroc possesses a sound similar to, yet simultaneously so unlike anything I tend to listen to in my regular rotation. He hails from Louisiana, and that soulful bayou flavor the region is known for can be heard sprinkled throughout every note on the record. At the same time, every bit of influence and grandeur held by the infamous Muscle Shoals infiltrates his music, too. It’s a fabulous mix of all of DuBroc’s musical influences, from soul and R&B with a dash of country and rock, to sounds reflecting his roots from the Cajun and Creole areas he was raised in. And that voice—with notes of everything mentioned prior slathered with copious amounts of gospel, Dubroc will take ya to the church grounds with that soul food he’s feeding you. Being a writer and songwriter, I’m much more of a wordsmith than a musician. So, I enjoy dissecting each piece for its lyrical meaning more so than reflecting on each instrument utilized in production. However, on this record, there’s not a deep meaning that has to be discerned—it’s light, easy, and every bit of feel good that it sounds like. Dubroc lays each tune out for listeners in a way that lends to easily connecting with the lyrics whilst getting lost in the dreamy music. By nature I like to drown myself in the sad songs, but I can totally vibe with this and bask in the love-filled sunshine of Sunny Days all of my days. So, let’s get to the songs, shall we?

The record begins with the first single released, “I Don’t Want to Lose You, Anna.” It’s a soulful R&B number about a man who can’t fathom losing his woman. He was lost until he found her, and home simply wouldn’t be the same without her love. Although Dubroc’s writing here doesn’t contain extreme depth and require intense thought, he is skilled in the art of lyrical portraiture, rendering quite the vivid image with phrases like “Barefooted in your cotton dress, Cajun moonshine silhouette, I can smell magnolia in your hair, I fell in love right then and there.” I can mentally insert myself into the moment he’s singing about and I fell in absolute love myself. And when he starts singing in another language? S W O O N. Dubroc possesses such a beautiful voice already, but that left me longing for more! ‘Tis quite the romantic tune, and a solid first single.

Still on the topic of love, the second track, “Small Town Talk,” focuses on the notion of the rumor mill interfering with a budding relationship. I was particularly drawn to this song due to the stark truth in its lyrics paired with a bit of an upbeat number. It describes the typical cyclical method of negative talk in small towns, circles, industries or any situation where lives overlap and its effect on people’s livelihoods. People may claim to mean well, such as with the southern statute “Bless your heart,” when in reality, they’re out to bring someone down. Whether due to jealousy or boredom, most just simply cannot stand to see others doing things they wish to do. So, they talk. And talk. And talk. Often so without realizing it it’s them, the gossipers, who are sinking in contrite conversations doing more damage to themselves than the ones whose character they try to diminish. If you’re struggling with situations such as those, pay attention when Dubroc sings “We’re only two people trying to live together, Trying to make something work, Who are we to judge one another, That can cause a lot of hurt.” In other words, don’t let small minded sentiments ruin something amazing in the making—whatever that may be in your life.

Continuing to sing of love, albeit in a much less merry way, Dubroc comes in strong with a heavy dose of longing and heartache with “She Sure Felt Good Last Night.” Based on the title, it doesn’t take much effort to surmise what the tune is about. Featuring the quintessential tale of the late night drunken phone call between former lovers, Dubroc relays the story of a man hoping he can change the mind of the woman on his doorstep because “she got to thinking about the only thing [he] ever did right.” Ah, a tale as old as time. It’s hard to let go of endeavors of the heart and someone is always left hanging on a very thin thread of hope, leaving the lines of goodbye quite murky. The song is very descriptive giving the subject matter the perfect sexy air it needs to sabotage your feelings, whether you relate more to the male or female character, or both interchangeably. Dubroc is certainly a master of his art form.

That mastery is quite apparent in “Mary Jo Brown.” In a way, it continues the thematic presence of love woven throughout the record; however, the song focuses more on self-love after years of Mary losing herself to a man blind to her misery. She stayed, perhaps because she felt it was the right thing to do or that she had no choice. Until the day that she realized she did in fact have a choice and left nothing but a long-overdue goodbye note with her husband’s coffee. When I listened, I felt as if Dubroc was singing my story, though fortunately I saved myself long before the timeframe Mary liberates herself in. Music that you can relate to—that’s what it’s all about. By this point in my dissection of the record, I have truly become fascinated at times with the way Dubroc at times utilizes the English language in his songwriting, and the chorus is exemplary of that. “The manifestation and liberation of Mary Jo Brown.” What a line! And so full of truth—it takes time and strength to manifest your freedom from the binds that tie you.

Dubroc reverts back to happier times down the rivers of love, with “I Do” and “I Can’t Wait.” In “I Do,” Dubroc is singing about a man longing for love—to fall deeply in it and live everyday loving the same person, which is quite the concept for a world that no longer appears to value relationships and marriage. It touched a forlorn part in my heart that one day hopes to find that for myself. Those feelings that “I Do” conjures up blend perfectly into the context of “I Can’t Wait,” which is the first song I heard by Dubroc, when my friend played it for me. It was the one that impressed and hooked me, well before I even knew what other magic I’d hear on the record. When I think of soul, R&B, and the Muscle Shoals sound, I think of smooth, sexy, romantic music—i.e. my favorite Alabamian who ever opened his mouth and blessed the world with his vocal chords, Anderson East. Dubroc channels those kind of vibes on “I Can’t Wait.” It’s a love song detailing just how much the man loves this woman he never expected to find, and is so descriptive it gave me heart palpitations, putting me in the mood—as in the mood to find a fella I can say “I Do” to and croon the words “I’m gonna take my time making up for all the time I spent without you.” I don’t know what it is about his music, but he may just be melting this tin-woman’s heart a bit with each listen. Perhaps this record needs a warning label: “If you’re running from love, listen with caution!”

The title track, “Sunny Days” is reminiscent of a place we’ve all been in the throes of a relationship, or life in general. Dubroc bemoans all the rainy, dark days that feel as if a flood of tears have washed some of the love away. I adore the hopeful air this song. With the addition of the intermittent whistling, it brings forth a reminder that things won’t always be this blue, and the sunlight is ever shining through the darkness. It’s a reminder we all need to take to heart in these uncertain times. There is light at the end of the tunnel—and it begins with you devouring this record. It’s soul food, remember? For me, it was like some unusual concoction of food added to my typical palate that I was so glad I discovered and joyfully stuffed myself with. I hope y’all feel the same.

Be sure to give Dubroc a follow on Facebook and on Instagram at @lancedubroc to keep up with all of the happenings surrounding the release and show announcements. If you’re interested, the record can be purchased at http://muscleshoalsrecordings.com/shop/.

Side note—if you’re well versed in our scene here at HHMR and you take a close look at the cover art, you’ll feel right at home as one of Appalachia’s favorites, Abraham Partridge, designed the fabulous artwork.

I hope to see y’all down the road, windows down, blaring this record, while chasing some sunny days.

Oh, and don’t forget: ✌🏻💙🎶

—Lyssa

——————————

*This is an independent review. The Hillbilly Hippie Music Review was not compensated for this review.

*The opinions expressed are solely that of the author(s).

*These images are not our, nor do we claim them in any way. They are copyrighted Lance Dubroc/Abraham Partridge.

[bforbookslut]

Sasha Alsberg and Lindsay Cummings’ Zenith Is a Space Adventure With a Familiar Story and Tropes

I have given Zenith by Sasha Alsberg and Lindsay Cummings a ☆☆☆ rating. It is Book 1 of The Androma Saga series. It is Young Adult Science Fiction with some Space Opera and Romance. Harlequin Teen publishes it. It will be published January 16, 2018.

The synopsis reads:

Most know Androma Racella as the Bloody Baroness, a powerful mercenary whose reign of terror stretches across the Mirabel Galaxy. To those aboard her glass starship, Marauder, however, she's just Andi, their friend and fearless leader. But when a routine mission goes awry, the Marauder's all-girl crew is tested as they find themselves in a treacherous situation and at the mercy of a sadistic bounty hunter from Andi's past. Meanwhile, across the galaxy, a ruthless ruler waits in the shadows of the planet Xen Ptera, biding her time to exact revenge for the destruction of her people. The pieces of her deadly plan are about to fall into place, unleashing a plot that will tear Mirabel in two. Andi and her crew embark on a dangerous, soul-testing journey that could restore order to their shipor just as easily start a war that will devour worlds. As the Marauder hurtles toward the unknown, and Mirabel hangs in the balance, the only certainty is that in a galaxy run on lies and illusion, no one can be trusted.

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I haven’t been this early for a review in a really long time but I was super excited to read Zenith ever since I received it. I’ve always loved space stories because if I wasn’t a writer, I’d love to be an astronaut. Or marine biologist. Or historian. Maybe librarian. You get the gist, I love to be a lot of things.

But, you’re in for a wild ride with Zenith. You either love it or hate it.

I haven’t written a review this long in a while so bear with me.

As always, my reviews may contain spoilers. I say may because what’s a spoiler to you may not be a spoiler for me.

Oh boy, is this a difficult one for me to review. My review process is this: I finish a book, I sit on it for a few days and then head over to Goodreads to get a refresher. Usually, it’s a good thing because it reminds me of things I want to mention but have forgotten. But with Zenith, it opened a massive can of worms I wish I had never seen.

Initially, Zenith was going to be one of my 4-star rating books. It turns out, I’m the perfect audience for it. I love damaged and fucked-up characters falling in love and I love all the drama. I went into Zenith expecting a soap opera/drama and I got it.

But after reading Goodreads and learning all I can about the background of this book, it’s dropped to a 3-stars. I don’t hate it. Zenith is not a bad book but it’s not good either. Did it blow me away? No. But, hell it was entertaining.

So, this review will be different than normal and split into 2 parts: first impressions and after goodreads.

F I R S T  I M P R E S S I O N S

I have never read a space opera before. I even had to Google what the genre is all about. And I loved what I found. As you probably know, I am a massive fan of Defy the Stars by Claudia Gray and until another mindblowing book comes along, that’s what I recommend whenever anyone asks me. And I expected Zenith to be something similar but more, for lack of a better term, extra.

And I loved it. I couldn’t put it down. It kept me up late at night and my eyes are probably rotten because I keep reading in the dark. I didn’t even realise it was 500 pages (cause my Kindle app doesn’t tell me so). It was dark and it was sensual, the writing clichés which some people might not like, were lyrical and poetic. The imagery spun was stunning.

Plot-wise, Zenith went in a multitude of directions. There’s the Androma, Dex and the Marauders plotline where the former two have to rescue the king’s prisoner son in the treacherous lands of Lord-I-can’t-remember (I’m not good with names here. I can’t even name you anything in Maas’s books because I never remember), but basically, they’re the bad guys. And then there’s the flashbacks (??!!) which are confusing but I just rolled with it. And then, there’s the evil queen of the bad lands who isn’t all that bad (or at least that’s what they want us to think) who wants revenge on the entire solar system for fucking up her kingdom and her parents’ lives and her life.

The Androma, Dex and Marauders line is resolved and then some. But the others just leave big question marks hanging in the air. But then again, Order of the Firsts, guys. It’s always like this because publishers want you coming back for more cause all they care about is the money.

Plus, they are all told in different POVs which can get confusing but it wasn’t a hard switch. It’s such a way of writing in YA that I’m used to it. I wish we could still get by on one voice only. I miss those damned days.

But to me, the characters make a story and I loved the Bloody Baroness. She’s dramatic and always very weepy and conflicted but oh, she’s so attracted to Dex. Let it just be clear that she’s very much like a copy of Celaena/Aelin but without the latter’s depth. She’s got death following her and her crew of pirates wherever they go and she’s torn up about it. Some people have an issue with the fact that she’s called something so vicious but is just a kicked puppy. But come on, this is a trope we’ve all seen before. Move along, shall we?

But, I did find it a little strange that although she hates killing, she kills everyone left, right and center in the name of protecting herself and her crew. Plus, she’s a fugitive.

Really weird and conflicting but at this point, I’m still rolling with it.

Dex is an arrogant prick. And while it’s my favourite trope when it comes to YA heroes, they usually come with some redeeming qualities. Dex has none. In fact, I’d say that I didn’t like Dex at all. He’s the perfect example of how not to write a YA hero.

And, the romance between Androma and Dex seemed incredibly forced. No chemistry. Just loads of trying-really-hard-to-create-UST.

The rest of the characters in Zenith sort of fade into the background. There are the Marauders which are very Six of Crows-esque, and the evil queen, Nor and there’s Valen, the prince they’re supposed to rescue. And a robot named Alfie that reminds me of Defy the Stars.

While Zenith attempts to fashion a unique space world, it feels too much like Guardians of the Galaxy and that bothered me about the worldbuilding. It didn’t feel utterly unique (unlike Defy the Stars. You can’t stop my love) and the entire time, all I could imagine was Peter Quill’s ship flying across the Guardians of the Galaxy space ala the movies. While there are references to unique “alien” features for example, in the pilot, Lira who has scaly skin that can heat until it burns her clothes off and it’s controlled by her emotions, nothing is taken a step further and explained.

And space opera and science-fiction are known for being detail-oriented.

But I still loved it. In all it’s campy, trying really hard glory. I thought it was a great first attempt and couldn’t wait for me.

A F T E R  G O O D R E A D S

And then, I looked at Goodreads.

I was confused by all the awful ratings. And it spiralled from there.

It turns out Sasha Alsberg is a notoriously famous booktuber (I wouldn’t know. I don’t booktube) and people are concerned that this book being published is because of her connections to the higher ups.

But more than that, the editor tied to Zenith is notorious for having published The Black Witch. Which is a plague on the YA community. I don’t understand how….how could anyone have let that racist crap slide.

And it was only after this that I realised what I had thought to be extra, dramatic and campy writing ala soap opera style was just bad writing. In fact, one reason why I loved the writing so much was because it’s the same time of exaggerated and flowery writing that fanfiction writers love (and readers like me eat it up).

Plus, it tried too hard to replicate the success of Throne of Glass and Six of Crows, perhaps in the hope of becoming the next big thing. It’s basically fanfiction set in space, guys. While I am the type of market this book is targeted towards, meaning that I love my tropes, it’s just laughable. There are tons of books out there like TOG and SOC but they’re all unique in their own way. I’ve even managed to reference Defy the Stars more than once!

Not to mention, Androma has red.hair. Who else has fiery red hair? You tell me. Hint, I’ve mentioned the name several times in this review. Not a fan of self-inserts.

Also, I am not a fan of celebrity books and have yet to purchase/read one. While other writers struggle and work their butts off to even get noticed, celebrities get special treatment because they already have a fan base in place.

While I am still looking forward to see where both authors are going to take Zenith, I wait with all these thoughts in my mind. In film classes, we are taught that the author is not separate from his work (and I did a lovely paper on Alfred Hitchcock which I loved) and it’s true in this case.

I’m afraid that Sasha’s reputation has coloured not just my opinion, but the opinion of many other readers out there.

While Zenith is not bad, it’s not great either. I can’t shout about it from the rooftops. For one, it reads too much like fanfiction (and we all know the kind of fanfiction turn book that has hit the market these days) and secondly, it needs a shitload more work before it’s public-worthy. Zenith has great potential. It just needs a lot more polishing, preferably throwing the entire draft away and writing it fresh. And perhaps, Sasha should consider a pen name.

Thank you to Edelweiss and the publisher for providing me with an ARC copy in exchange for an honest review. This review edition may differ from the final edition.

[moriganstrongheart]

The Mammoth Book of SF Stories by Women – Review

Edited by Alex Dally MacFarlane ​2014, Running Press Paperback, 512 pages, $17.50 CAD

Rating: ★★★☆☆

Good: Great diversity, showcases excellent talent Bad: Not all stories are a worthwhile read

In her introduction to The Mammoth Book of SF Stories by Women, Alex Dally MacFarlane does a good job of laying down the purpose of the collection. She is not looking to change the sexism that festers within the writing industry, but is instead interested in building on a rich history of women writers in science fiction, demonstrating what female authors are able to do. Though if given the chance, I'm sure the authors in this anthology would see women given their rightful place as prestigious members of the industry. While things are rarely that easy, the stories collected here speak for themselves as to what women can accomplish when given the chance. I don’t think every story in this collection is worthwhile, but I also think that shouldn’t be taken as a slight against female authors, as I found many to be engaging reading experiences. I also would like to preface by saying I’m not generally a fan of short story collections; it takes me too long to read them, and I find myself cheated if a short story isn’t as good as I expected. I tried my best to not let this influence my opinions, but I may be harsher on some entries in this collection as a result.

To give each author the attention that is due to them, I will be reviewing each story on its own, and then conclude with my opinion on the anthology as a whole.

[ ! ] Spoiler Warning

Girl Hours

by Sofia Samatar, 2011 Rating: ★★★★☆

Girl Hours is a short poem written in reverse chronological order about the life of Henrietta Swan Leavitt, a woman computer from the 1870's. Being based on true events and taking the form of a poem, it has little to do with science fiction, though it is still an interesting read. As with most poems, word choice is limited, putting much of the onus on the reader to establish themes and timing. I normally find this pretentious, but I enjoyed the format in this instance. Girl Hours is one of the few stories I have read multiple times out of pure enjoyment, as its structure allowed for reading front-to-back as well as back-to-front, letting the reader to experience the poem differently each time.

Link to Poem

Excerpt from a Letter by a Social-realist Aswang

by Kristin Mandigma, 2007 Rating: ★★☆☆☆

Excerpt from a Letter by a Social-realist Aswang is an interesting take on socialist mindsets. The text itself is enjoyable in its tone, but fails to make a lasting impression on me. I would have liked to see more of the world than what was presented, as the piece consists only of its namesake: an excerpt from a letter by an Aswang. While I find gaps in a narrative to generally be a good thing, it can be frustrating when that gap is too wide—as if the author is expecting the reader to fill in the majority of the worldbuilding for them. The strength of Excerpt from a Letter by a Social-realist Aswang is in its lighthearted tone, which Kristin Madigma uses to criticize socialist mindsets through the writings of the author-character. The aswang rambles about communist ideals and writes degrading comments about capitalism—like any good neo-communist. The fact that the author-character is an aswang adds onto the ridiculousness of the situation, as they include activities such as the consumption of capitalist children in their socialist portfolio. Excerpt from a Letter by a Social-realist Aswang is a fun little piece that would benefit from an expanded narrative, and I felt that it was ultimately forgettable in its details.

Link to Short Story

Somadeva: A Sky River Sutra

by Vandana Singh, 2010 Rating: ★★★☆☆

Indian culture has never been something I’ve personally found interesting. As Somadeva: A Sky River Sutra relies heavily on cultural artifacts and historical persons from India, I often felt lost in its many references. I think Vandana Singh did a good job of explaining the most relevant parts to her story, but the folklore is far too complex and I do not have the desire to investigate it further. I thoroughly enjoyed the themes, as Singh builds stories within stories within stories, creating her own mini-compilation of folktales and adventures. Narration is well done, as is the imagery, which accurately describes how time-lost souls would search for meaning in a world where memory is fleeting at best. However, there was a bit too much going on and it ends a bit abruptly for my taste; I would have preferred some kind of conclusion, even if it did not conclude with the protagonists’ journey. I am sure those interested in Indian culture will find this story much more compelling than I did, but the themes are strong enough to hold up the story on their own.

Link to Short Story

The Queen of Erewhon

by Lucy Sussex, 1999 Rating: ★★☆☆☆

I’ll be honest in that reading The Queen of Erewhon was like reading Shakespeare from the future—and not in a good way. If you’ve ever had to read Shakespeare in its raw, historically-correct format, you may have had some issues understanding some of the nuances inherit from the time period in which is was written. Something similar is the case with The Queen of Erewhon. Lucy Sussex keeps shifting between two different narratives: one that details the protagonist’s journey to uncover a story about two women falling in love, and the actual story of these two women falling in love. On its own this was confusing enough; there is no clear delineation between when one narrative starts and another one ends. I kept having to stop reading to reorient myself whenever this switch occurred. My confusion was aggravated further by Sussex’s rich, almost overpowering politics and worldbuilding. Every other passage contains extensive amount of exposition that dilutes the purpose of the story. I normally don’t enjoy unfiltered politics in fiction, and The Queen of Erewhon has some of the worst examples of this. And yet, despite my difficulties, I did enjoy the story’s themes and—once I had finally gotten used to the format—I even enjoyed the narrative itself. But the experience of reading The Queen of Erewhon was a hassle. I found myself often taking breaks throughout my reading and it felt like I was putting more work into understanding the story than actually enjoying it.

​Tomorrow is Saint Valentine’s Day

​by Tori Truslow, 2010 Rating: ★★☆☆☆

Tomorrow is Saint Valentine’s Day is more of an interesting read than it is entertaining. Tori Truslow goes at great lengths to present the narrative in the format of a biography and to incorporate passages from Shakespeare at multiple levels in the prose. She succeeded in creating a realistic description of a fictional man and his adventures through the fae world. I could easily see this faux-excerpt as coming from a full volume detailing the life of Elijah Willemot Wynn. The world was a little difficult to grasp at first, but I found myself well immersed thanks to Truslow’s decision to write her short story in a non-fiction style. It made the story feel grounded and real. My only issue with Tomorrow is Saint Valentine’s Day was the inclusion of poetry and Shakespeare, which seemed out of place to me. It’s as if Truslow wanted to offset the dry, non-fiction aspects of the story with more whimsical passages. These passages—more than anything else—broke my immersion in the narrative. I don’t think they should have been omitted though, as these poetic passages are integral to the narrative she’s woven. I just wonder if it could have been handled better; perhaps if the author of the biography had spent more time analyzing the poems and references to Shakespeare, it would feel more grounded and less eccentric.

Spider the Artist

by Nnedi Okorafor, 2011 Rating: ★★★★★

Nnedi Okorafor tackles a lot of issues in Spider the Artist: domestic violence, the exploitation of third world countries, environmentalism and machine sentience. Normally, I would find so many topics packed into a short story overwhelming. But Okorafor managed to create a relatable and realistic protagonist in Eme, to the point I felt deeply connected to Eme as she wrestled with her identity in this broken world. If I have one criticism, it is how quickly the story resolves itself; it feels as though in one moment Eme is discovering who she is, and the next she is in the middle of a war. I don’t think the strength of Spider the Artist is the issues it tackles or the ideas it presents. Instead, it is strongest when we get to live life through Eme’s eyes. As such, I wish we could have spent more time with her. I would be interested in reading more from Okorafor, especially if she has longer works of fiction.

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The Science of Herself

​by Karen Joy Fowler, 2013 Rating: ★☆☆☆☆

The Science of Herself is an interesting read—even leading me to research further into Mary Anning following my reading. However, the frequent name drops and descriptions of pre-Victorian era England bored me. I am not a fan of historical fiction, so this just wasn’t for me. Also, while I think it’s important to highlight people like Mary Anning lest we forget what she and other women in history have done, I don’t think stuffing thirty persons into a short story is the best way to do so, especially if the reader is unfamiliar with the subject matter.

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​​The Other Graces

by Alice Sola Kim, 2010 Rating: ★★★★☆

The best part of The Other Graces is its inclusion of wacky, weird and wonderful science fiction shenanigans—specifically, in the form of a multidimensional, time-travelling network of singular consciousness which inhabits the minds of two versions of the protagonist for the purpose of ensuring the future of the younger protagonist, while simultaneously allowing the narrator to speak to the reader and the protagonist. And surprisingly, this multidimensional consciousness is rarely the focus of attention. There are some clues as to the ethical implications of using such a technology, and it is used at times as a metaphor for mental health issues, but these themes are glossed over in favour of plot. I feel that Alice Sola Kim handled all of this well, as it can be easy to be swept up in the majesty of one’s own conceptualization; too often I see entire storylines devoted to explaining how the author’s futurology would function and how it would impact society. The Other Graces manages to introduce an otherworldly concept like multidimensional consciousness while focusing on character, anchoring the reader in what would otherwise be a strange experience.

I also appreciated the way Kim presented Grace and her life as a person of Asian descent living in poverty. In some instances, I felt she may have over-characterized how downtrodden Grace was in her attempt to reset expectations about lower-class Asian-Americans. I understand that the fetishization of the exotic and status prejudice are big issues for minority groups; racists seem to think that people of different cultures are simultaneously privileged, yet inferior to them. However, I find this kind of negative language off-putting, as if unhealthy habits and subpar living conditions are a mark of pride for the character. There is no shame in what we can’t reasonably control, but doesn’t mean we can’t strive to be better. Grace certainly feels she can do better for herself; I just wish less time was spent on self-depreciation. I understand that others may be able to identify with her self-loathing, but it may also help to normalize negativity in like-minded readers.

Boojum

by Elizabeth Bear & Sarah Monette, 2008 Rating: ★★★★☆

Boojum is a combination of the familiar and the surreal, meant to dazzle and confuse, to entertain yet left wanting more. I don’t have a lot to say beyond the fact it’s a great example of what a short story should strive for. Elizabeth Bear and Sarah Monette weave an interesting, futuristic take on Lovecraftian and pirate lore—two genres of speculative fiction I have had a long-time love-hate relationship with. I’ve always enjoyed the aesthetics of Lovecraft, but could never get past how ridiculous and pompous it is. By the same token, I enjoy the aesthetic and romance of pirate stories, but I sometimes feel that authors rely too much on nautical know-how to carry the narrative rather than good characterization. My criticisms of these subgenres could also be applied to Boojum, though to a lesser extent. I think what saves Boojum to me is its excellent pacing and narrative structure, focusing on the way Black Alice interacts with the world, rather than having the story focus on the world itself. And so I can look past some of my issues to enjoy Boojum for what it is: a fun space-pirate story with minor horror elements.

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The Eleven Holy Numbers of the Mechanical Soul

by Natalia Theodoridou, 2014 Rating: ★☆☆☆☆

The Eleven Holy Numbers of the Mechanical Soul skirts the edge between surreal and survival thriller, dipping its toes in both genres without commiting to either. I found the references to holy numbers and the fluctuating perspectives more distracting than compelling; it felt as though the author was trying too hard to add a mystical element to the story, in an attempt to elevate the story beyond being just science-fiction. It also never felt as though anything was at stake, with survival elements acting more as padding than anything compelling. Part of me wonders if this was all intentional, as if Natalia Theodoridou wants the reader to ask questions rather than just passively experiencing the story. Where exactly is Theo? Is he on a habitable planetoid? Are the machines sentient? Or are they just machinations of Theo’s engineering mind? Is he waiting for something? Will someone ever come? These questions are an undercurrent to the events in the story, and are what occupied my thoughts following my reading. However, there’s little substance to the story itself. In my opinion, Theodoridou excels at building a rich world around her characters, but I was not a fan of how she structured her narrative.

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Mountain Ways

by Ursula K. Le Guin, 1996 Rating: ★★★★★

Unfortunately, I never had much exposure to Ursula K. Le Guin in my childhood, and it’s only recently that I’ve begun to hear how much she has contributed to literature. Her talent is obvious in Mountain Ways; after what I felt was a rocky start, I was fully immersed in her story. She places the focus on the characters, and the way they interact and change with the world, rather than on the world itself. Characters act like real people, with goals, flaws, worries and emotions. The world feels real and makes sense within the rules set by Le Guin. My only criticisms lie in the story’s beginning and ending. While I understand the necessity of explaining the complex marriage practices of the culture in Mountain Ways, I’m always wary when an author feels the need to address the reader directly regarding their world’s lore. It should instead be understood naturally through the interactions between characters, as they navigate their world and come to understand it. Although, her warning regarding the complexity of the ki’O’s marriage practices is well-founded; I often found myself confused when it came to marriage terminology, especially once genders were falsified. As for the ending, the conflict felt forced and unresolved. It’s as if the narrative could not end without some kind of conflict—as though Le Guin did not feel confident enough in her characters being influenced by anything but spurned love or misplaced anxiety. I felt betrayed that Shahes became so emotional, stubborn and unreasonable towards the end—especially after displaying such conviction, passion and determination up until then. Her stubbornness seems like a natural extension of her character, but she quickly became shallow and unlikable.

Perhaps this change in Shahes was what Le Guin was aiming for from the beginning. The change in narrative focus from Shahes to Enno/Alka is evidence of this. Beginning as a secondary character, Enno/Alka slowly turns into the protagonist, while simultaneously growing closer to the other members of their sedoretu and experiencing a rift with Shahes. I believe this change in focus is what kept me invested in the story, as I quickly latched onto Enno/Alka where previously I had difficulty feeling connected to Shahes near the beginning.

I also think Le Guin made the right choice in how she directly addresses sexuality and gender identity. In the world of O, the people inhabiting therein are bound together by marriage. Homosexuality seems accepted—even encouraged—and pre-marital sex is common practice. However, people are still expected to marry for the purpose of reproduction, with individuals expected to couple with a man and woman in a four-way relationship. As is the case with most stories worth being told, the main cast of characters seek to subvert these established laws through deception. While the events in the story are certainly interesting and help to build drama, there’s also a clear contrast with the gender politics and discussions of sexuality of our modern world. Mountain Ways reminds us that no matter how open and accepting your society might be, there will always be people who push the limits of what’s acceptable in the name of free love. It also reminds us that deception in relationships is difficult on individuals, and what may seem like a good idea in theory, is much more difficult in practice. I think it’s important that Le Guin does not preach free love as infallible, and helps to make Enno/Alka likeable, as they walk the line between wanting to follow their heart and following their beliefs. They are not bound by conviction, but by morality and reason.

Despite my issues with Mountain Ways’ beginning and ending, Ursula K. Le Guin lives up to her reputation by immersing the reader in her world almost effortlessly, while offering us the chance to explore important topics like sexuality and gender identity through excellent world-building. She demonstrates the power of science-fiction: the power to convey a message and discuss issues through metaphor, without being muddied by the social politics of the modern world.

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​​Tan-Tan and Dry Bone

by Nalo Hopkinson, 1999 Rating: ★★☆☆☆

​I’ll begin by saying that the dialect Nalo Hopkinson chose for Tan-Tan and Dry Bone wasn’t for me. It made it difficult for me to become immersed in the narrative from the beginning all the way to the end. I thought the dialogue—which used the same dialect—was excellent. It felt authentic, and I could listen to an entire play or film with characters speaking in this manner. However, I was quickly fatigued by the dialect’s use in the narrative, leading to me having to repeatedly re-read passages to make I understood what was going on. That being said, I did enjoy Tan-Tan and Dry Bone for what it was. Unfortunately, I didn’t get as much out of it as I think someone familiar with African culture would. To me it was a simple folktale with the purpose of representing African culture, while simultaneously conveying a message of hope for women caught in abusive relationships.

​​The Four Generations of Chang E

by Zen Cho, 2011 Rating: ★☆☆☆☆

The Four Generations of Chang E attempts to tackle real world issues through metaphor and allegory—in this case, the issues of immigration, segregation and personal identity. I think Zen Cho tackles these issues with a grace that points to a familiarity born from experience, or at least from close study of them. However, I found the story to be rather boring overall and the metaphors a bit on the nose. Characters also felt flat and one-dimensional; caricatures of actual people rather than real people onto themselves. The focus is placed on social issues, leaving the rest of the story feeling rushed, hollow and unfinished. I can appreciate how Cho used science fiction for tackling these important issues, but I could not get immersed in the narrative itself.

​Stay Thy Flight

by Elisabeth Vonarburg, 1992 Rating: ★★☆☆☆

Stay Thy Flight has a very rough opening few paragraphs. The beginning third or so presents a very difficult barrier of entry, as the author uses punctuation and fragmented phrases to represent how time passes faster for the protagonist than for the reader, before said reader has even had the chance to understand what’s happening. The sequence also lasts longer and contains more intense descriptions than I think is necessary to convey the theme of how time is fleeting. In fact—in fear of what I may have to put myself through—I even read ahead to see if I was in for a long, difficult read under this format. If I had met this story outside of this collection, I most likely would have stopped reading it after the first or second paragraph for this reason alone. Even though I love the themes that Elisabeth Vonarburg conveys, all I wanted was to finish and move on as quickly as possible. It’s a shame, since Stay Thy Flight is an excellent piece of fiction and could have stood on its own, without the need for such extravagant prose.

As an aside, I tried to find the French version of this story—titled ...suspends ton vol—but unfortunately, I could not find it published stand-alone online. It is only available as part of French short story collections, which I am not ready to purchase or find in a bookstore for the sake of my curiosity. However, I would have liked to read Stay Thy Flight in its original format, to see if the opening felt more organic in Vonarburg’s native tongue.

Astrophilia

​by Carrie Vaughn, 2012 Rating: ★★★★★

Perhaps it’s a testament to the skill that Carrie Vaughn and Ursula K. Le Guin hold in writing fiction, but I feel I am quickly becoming a fan of the “lesbian farmer” trope. Astrophilia reminds me a lot of Le Guin’s entry in this collection, and Vaughn manages to capture my interest with her romance just as Le Guin was able to weave a story full of wonder, internal conflict and change. If I am honest, homosexual relationships in rustic environments have always been of particular interest to me. I think what pulls me to this trope is the atmosphere, combined with the inherit rebelliousness that the characters must adopt to make their relationship work. It’s thrilling and endearing at the same time. Add on the expectation that people must raise children once they are of age in these kinds of settings, and the field is laid out for compelling storytelling.

The romance between Stella and Andi embodies the best of this trope, and Vaughn seems to have a knack for writing a compelling romance on top of it all. I was fully invested in both characters, and the final conflict had me on the edge of my seat. I was a little disappointed in how things were wrapped up though. It felt less like an authentic conversation between adults, and more of a sermon from the author to the reader on the moral of the story. I wasn’t convinced by Toma’s change of heart; it’s not that I think a more violent end would have been more appropriate, but I feel as though Stella could have convinced him without trying to appeal to a belief he had had instilled in him since his childhood. I’ve never known someone to change their mind that suddenly, especially when they have been repeatedly challenged before. However, the rest of the story was superb, and I must also mention that I appreciate that the main source of conflict is not the topic of homosexuality itself; Vaughn chose to subvert the expectation that stories with homosexuality must ultimately contain conflict surrounding the sexuality of its characters, often ending in violence. While stories depicting the difficulties homosexual people face everyday is important, it’s also important to depict people existing outside of their sexual identity.

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Invisible Planets

by Hao Jingfang, 2013 Rating: ★☆☆☆☆

I think what I most disliked about Invisible Planets was its format, in that it is simply a collection of worldbuilding concepts. Invisible Planets goes so far as to separate each world into its own section, with some commentary between the narrator and a surrogate for the reader (as the narrator addresses “you” throughout the story, and “you” respond). I do not know what the intent Hao Jinfang had when writing Invisible Planets. The structure feels uninspiring and bland. The exchange between the narrator and “you” near the end of the story feels similarly uninspired, and mystically nonsensical. There was no narrative here, only a collection of ideas. While that can be fine on its own, to me it feels lazy and unfinished. It’s the equivalent of going up to a writer or director at a convention and telling them you have this great idea, but you haven’t done any actual writing. You only wrote down the idea, dusted your hands and said “Yup, that’s good.” before moving onto the next project. Each world Jingfang presents to us is interesting enough on its own to warrant in-depth exploration, but instead she chooses to present them as flat canvases with which she expects us to paint our own narrative. Invisible Planets feels like a step back from what makes science fiction literature unique—in that it can explore themes and stories untethered by the weight of the real world. What it is instead is a synopsis for a series of pulp fiction novels from the 1940’s.

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On the Leitmotif of the Trickster Constellation in Northern Hemispheric Star Charts, Post-Apocalypse

by Nicole Kornher-Stace, 2013 Rating: ★☆☆☆☆

From the outset, it was clear to me that On the Leitmotif of the Trickster Constellation in Northern Hemispheric Star Charts, Post-Apocalypse would be one of those stories that relied as much on flowery language as it did on weaving a compelling narrative. Combined with textbook-style prefaces, Nicole Kornher-Stace manages to craft the pinnacle of pretentiousness. It’s a shame because the story has a magnificent world and interesting characters behind all of its presentation. Kornher-Stace’s use of poetic prose and textbook-style elements confuses what ends up being a rather simple story. It’s an inspiring, deeply moving story. But I could not bring myself to care as I had to move through a veil of fog before I could enjoy it. There are times where unique formats can help to elevate a story, to enhance the message it is trying to convey. Most of the time—when an author attempts to deliver their story in a unique way—they are either experimenting or are crying for attention. I do not know which is the case for On the Leitmotif of the Trickster Constellation in Northern Hemispheric Star Charts, Post-Apocalypse, but either way, the format Korher-Stace chose detracts from the overall experience. If anything I think this story would work well as a quest in an RPG, wherein in the player would learn the fragmented history of the world through exploration, and Wasp’s character through gameplay. But it just fails in its current format to be a worthwhile piece of fiction.

Valentines

​by Shira Lipkin, 2009 Rating: ★★★★★

Shira Lipkin was able to convincingly sell what it’s like to live in the mind of a person trying to make sense of their world through the act of recording everything on paper. Acting almost like a computer, the protagonist has to constantly write down and then index things around her. I came out of Valentines thinking a lot about the human condition and how we think. It’s a simple story, but it conveys its message well. Lipkin has a good sense of detail, focusing on elements that put us in the mind of the protagonist, even if you don’t have experience with epilepsy or memory loss yourself.

​​Dancing in the Shadow of the Once

​by Rochita Loenen-Ruiz, 2013 Rating: ★★☆☆☆

I found Dancing in the Shadow of the Once boring, as it suffers from the issue of presenting a problem, waiting for the reader to solve it and then having the characters enact the solution long after the reader has already decided what the solution should be. The problem in this case is whether Hala should stop being a cultural historian for the amusement of the colonist elite, and the solution is her no longer being in this position. As a reader, it becomes obvious in the latter half of the story that she will follow this path, all that remains is to know how she will get there. I found this tedious as the character walks methodically to the resolution, with no new developments along the way. Rochita Loenen-Ruiz also falls into a trap I often see accompanying this kind of storytelling problem: she withholds information, or only provides enough characterization to further the plot and then retroactively develops the character in the hopes of keeping things ambiguous or mysterious. I find this writing technique shows a lack of faith in the author’s own work, which didn’t help my already low opinion of the story. The only thing that kept me interested were the story’s themes of colonialism and imperialism, that were unfortunately not as prominent as I would have liked. I also enjoyed the discussions around the culture, as few as they were. Finally, one of the strongest moments in the story is the dance between Hala and Bayninan, as it becomes clear that Bayninan has romantic feelings for Hala. It’s a shame the rest of the story does not live up to the emotional impact of this moment.

Ej-Es

​by Nancy Kress, 2010 Rating: ★★★★★

There’s just something about living life through a character’s perspective for a short time, to see the world as they do, to hear their thoughts, feel their doubts and experience their pain. Nancy Kress succeeds at this in Ej-Es. I was captivated throughout my reading, feeling as though I knew Mia on an intimate level, even though I only spent a short time with her. She felt like a real person; a woman tired of protocol, far from where she first began but still holding onto what she values the most. She knows her place in the world and how to navigate it, and yet comes off as vulnerable all the same. Kress managed to craft a compelling character piece, while simultaneously commenting on missionary work and how it impacts indigenous people. Kress writes wonderfully, conveying a compelling story with realistic characters and immersive narration.

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The Cartographer Wasps and the Anarchist Bees

​by E. Lily Yu, 2011 Rating: ★★★☆☆

The Cartographer Wasps and the Anarchist Bees surprised me, in that E. Lily Yu manages to weave a rather compelling fairy tale, seemingly creating it wholecloth from nothing; or at least, I have never heard of this specific folktale before. It has some of the familiar trappings of fairy tales: whimsical creatures, talking animals and a morally good ending. There’s also a good amount of commentary on imperialism and politics, without the topics being forced down the reader’s throat. The only thing I’m not too sure about is what part the anarchist bees have in the story. They don’t seem to have any impact on the story; in fact, everything is resolved without the bees doing anything at all to secure their freedom. The only explanation I have is the story must be based on real-life events of which I’m not familiar with, or its implied that while the anarchists did not survive, their ideologies will live on in this hive’s society to inform decisions in the future. Either way, I can’t shake the feeling that Yu is making reference either to either historical events or an existing fable. If this is an isolated work, free from influence, then there’s a lack of clarity and consistency in the story, with too much left up for the reader to interpret. In either case, The Cartographer Wasps and the Anarchist Bees is a great fable-like story that shows that simple, concise stories often work best to convey an author’s message.

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The Death of Sugar Daddy

​by Toiya Kristen Finley, 2009 Rating: ★★★★☆

I was on edge for a good part of The Death of Sugar Daddy, mostly due to the way people in the story would refer to Sugar Daddy. I felt he would end up being a pedophile or some kind of undying being—both of which may still be the case, but I’m not convinced one way or the other. This rising sense of dread transformed into a feeling of heartfelt anticipation as more and more of the world spilled out, slowly building a picture of a world wherein memory is intrinsically tied to existence. Toiya Kristen Finley does an amazing job of building the world through her characters; the protagonist and supporting characters help to build the world without acting as walking exposition dumps, with defined personalities and lives outside the context of the plot. Finley proves to me once again that character-driven narratives are the best vehicles for worldbuilding, as they allow the reader to discover the world organically instead of academically.

I also liked that Finley was able to convey African-American culture without over-the-top social commentary. There was still some underlying social commentary about the wealth disparity of African-Americans in the western world, but it was never anything significantly overt. I can normally appreciate social commentary in fiction, but the character-driven narrative of The Death of Sugar Daddy allows the characters to experience this wealth inequality instead of preaching to the reader. It’s refreshing to have something that makes you think about the issue from a human perspective instead of a political one.

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Enyo-Enyo

by Kameron Hurley, 2013 Rating: ★☆☆☆☆

Some parts of Enyo-Enyo are genuinely interesting, and I think the underlying story is emotionally impactful, if not a little strange. However, any positive elements the story may have are overshadowed by its presentation—more specifically, the choice in vocabulary and the story’s narrative structure. From the first three or four paragraphs, it’s made clear to the reader that Enyo’s world is alien. This would normally be a good thing, but Kameron Hurley goes too far, and ended up alienating me with how “other” Enyo’s world is. And while I don’t have an issue with the non-linear timeline of events, it only helped to compound these issues here, making it even more difficult for me to follow what’s happening. Enyo-Enyo is a simple story told in a complicated manner—very rarely is this kind of storytelling effective, and often paints the author as pompous and shallow. It’s a shame, because I think I would have liked Enyo-Enyo if Hurley had written in a more straightforward manner.

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Semiramis

​by Genevieve Valentine, 2011 Rating: ★★★☆☆

The easiest way for me to sum up Semiramis is to say that it instills a feeling that something is about to happen, or that some change is about to occur, but the reader is ultimately left at the precipice of anticipation, without anything ever being resolved. I didn’t like this at first. The protagonist-narrator would always seem on the cusp of making some kind of realization before moving onto the next bit of exposition or the next source of conflict. As a result, all of the events muddle together—with no beginning, no end. But as I reflected on what Genevieve Valentine might be trying to do, I came to my own realization that a feeling of helplessness is exactly what she was trying to convey. Between the global climate crisis and the protagonist’s struggle with their duties, environment and relationships, I underwent a general feeling of unease as the events of the story unfolded. It’s almost depressing as you come to the conclusion that sometimes, things are just out of your control, and all you can do is little things to make your life worth living. The world is cruel, unforgiving and need not pay mind to every individual. Not all conflicts come to a satisfying end, and waiting for something to happen will only lead to more anxiety as time moves on without regard for each individual’s desires.

I am still unsure whether I truly enjoyed Semiramis. Despite the message she was trying to convey, I had a difficult time initially remembering the contents of the story within a day of writing this. Perhaps the effects of the story were stronger than the actual fiction, and that should point to the power of what she was trying to do.

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Immersion

by Aliette de Bodard, 2012 Rating: ★☆☆☆☆

Immersion is something that’s outside of my lived experience, but is easy enough to read that it doesn’t really matter. Sometimes, this can be a good thing. But when it comes to Immersion, I’m not sure if Aliette de Bodard utilized the medium correctly. I get the message of the story; colonialism is bad, and often the colonized are the ones who have to fight back, or risk being overwhelmed. Where Immersion fails is that the world and the story’s underlying message don’t mesh. De Bodard goes back and forth between describing a rich fictional world and taking time to preach their gospel to the reader, with obvious tonal breaks between the two. In fact, there is a surprising number of exposition dumps for a short story of this length, most of which I ended up speeding through. The information provided has little impact on the conflicts the protagonist is dealing with. De Bodard also utilizes a trope I dislike, namely the constant need to excuse bad dialogue by labelling it as “inevitable” or “obligatory”. I can’t help but feel that de Bodard’s writing is uninviting, and that it lacks the polish that’s needed to convey whatever message she wants to get across.

Down the Wall

by Greer Gilman, 2015 Rating: ★☆☆☆☆

There’s just something about the writing in stories like Down the Wall that instantly turned me off. It feels like Greer Gilman is intentionally making the writing obtuse in an effort to make some kind of statement, or to convey a sense of the world she’s trying to portray. It just helps to break my immersion, forcing me to think about what the author is trying to say rather than investing myself in the world, characters and themes. I have to actively read and re-read passages, questioning if I truly understand what is going on. This kind of writing just makes me feel the author is pretentious, and unwilling or unable to let their story stand on its own. From what little I took from Down the Wall, I think it could have been a great story about children surviving in a run-down world, oppressed by adults and the system alike. But in reality, it is a confusing bowl of word soup bogged down by a lack of direction or purpose.

Sing

​by Karin Tidbeck, 2013 Rating: ★★★★☆

I instantly felt pulled in by Karin Tidbeck’s writing, fully immersed in the world she has created and the complex characters she introduces. Sing is a great example of what a short story should try to accomplish. Tidbeck gives us a slice, a mere glimpse of a person’s life as they go through their day to day life. You should be left wanting more, but also content with what you were given. I know that there are a lot of different kinds of stories out there; character-driven stories are not the only valid story type. But I’ve yet to find another story type that’s as engaging in this short story format. So many times I see movies and short stories trying to focus on world-building, plot, or even style, only to end up being convoluted or vapid in the process. Perhaps I’m just bitter, but Sing shows that you can have a fun, thought-provoking and immersive short story without needing to rely on literary tricks. I have a hard time finding anything wrong with Tidbeck’s writing, and I’m excited to read more of her work in the future.

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Good Boy

by Nisi Shawl, 2009 Rating: ★★★★★

I felt myself enjoying Good Boy both on the surface level as well as within its deeper meanings. Nisi Shawl manages to craft a fun ride as we follow the antics of the titular Good Boy, after a short introduction to the characters and the concept of spiritual possession. There was something almost satirical about the way a hard science-fiction problem like colony-wide depression is resolved by dredging up the ghost of a 60’s-70’s Black clubgoer. Kressi’s serious, somber attitude is a fun contrast to the personality of Ivorene’s spirits. It’s just an enjoyable experience overall—and yet—below all this absurdity, is a surprisingly thoughtful exploration of colonization, the perception of spirituality, mother-daughter relationships, Black identity, and even the interpretation of spiritual possession as algorithmic computer logic. Shawl is somehow able to pack a lot within such a short story. These are the kinds of stories that make short stories worth it for me, with compelling characters, fun situations and thoughtful themes that stick with me long after I’ve finished reading.

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The Second Card of the Major Arcana

by Thoraiya Dyer, 2012 Rating: ★★★☆☆

The Second Card of the Major Arcana feels like the setup to a joke, expanded over the length of a whole story, and then dramatized so much that’s no longer a joke—while remaining just as entertaining. The premise is simple, but I enjoyed Thoraiya Dyer’s approach in their execution of said premise. There isn’t a lot to say about The Second Card of the Major Arcana; it’s a fun little story with a great punchline, with my only criticism being that the violence and the sphinx’s mannerisms came across a bit juvenile. It sometimes felt like I was reading the edgy fanfiction of a DeviantArt teenager, rather than the thoughtful, well-developed prose of an established author. I have a hard time seeing this choice in tone as an issue though, considering it only reinforces the playful nature of the story.

Link to Short Story

A Short Encyclopedia of Lunar Seas

by Ekaterina Sedia, 2008 Rating: ★★★☆☆

This is the second short story in this anthology that has to do with the moon—and more specifically mermaids on the moon—which makes me curious whether there’s some established folklore I’m not familiar with regarding the moon and fae-like beings. That aside, A Short Encyclopedia of Lunar Seas is exactly what it sets out to be: a series of isolated stories based around the “seas” of the lunar surface. Ekaterina Sedia manages to weave a charming and whimsical set of tales that I found myself simultaneously amazed and confused by. Normally, the latter would be a detriment to the overall experience, but I think the segmented nature of Sedia’s work allows this kind of exploration. She’s able to explore outlandish topics at a fast pace, moving from one to the other without the need to retain much from the previous snippets beyond her style of prose. A Short Encyclopedia of Lunar Seas is an interesting experience, though not a significantly fulfilling one. I didn’t find myself coming from this story having learned or felt anything specific; it felt more akin to a series of short fairy tales aimed at adults, complete with a surprising amount of descriptions of breasts, though nothing that I felt was overtly sexual.

Vector

by Benjanun Sriduangkaew, 2013 Rating: ★★★☆☆

Vector is a good example in my mind of how to write flowery prose for a science-fiction or fantasy story without it feeling pretentious. I don’t think I’d be able to draw a distinct line between something that feels genuine and in service of the story, versus something that’s merely decorative and just a chance for the author to show their skills with a thesaurus. However, Benjanun Sriduangkaew manages to keep my attention throughout, and I never felt overwhelmed by her metaphors. Perhaps that is what makes for good flowery prose: a focus on metaphor in service of theme, rather than on superfluous wording that only serves to pad the text. Vector shows you can do the former effectively, reinforcing the themes instead of muddling them.

I think where Vector fails is that it wears its theme on its sleeve. Sriduangkaew manages to present the theme of the effects of religious-white colonialism in an interesting way, but I think she sacrificed characterization and any semblance of worldbuilding in the process. In other words, Vector opts to punch you in the face with its themes, with science-fiction elements sprinkled on top for decoration. It feels more like a chance for the author to soapbox than an authentic storytelling experience.

Concerning the Unchecked Growth of Cities

by Angélica Gorodischer, 2003 Rating: ★★★★★

Concerning the Unchecked Growth of Cities is pure worldbuilding. After getting used to the narrative style, I can say I thoroughly enjoyed myself as Angélica Gorodischer basically spent the entire length of her story delivering exposition on a single city. I’ll be honest that I wasn’t on board at first, but I quickly became enraptured by the complex, weaving story told from the perspective of the narrator. The narrative tone is also fun and a bit cheeky, which helped to lighten the expository load. The narrator is no-nonsense, but sass and sarcasm drips from almost every passage. Paragraphs are long and go on for too long, adding to the idea that Concerning the Unchecked Growth of Cities is a story being told orally—or at the very least, informally—by an aging storyteller. Gorodischer did a great job at not only weaving an interesting world, but managing to present in an entertaining way.

The Radiant Car Thy Sparrows Drew

by Catherynne M. Valente, 2009 Rating: ★☆☆☆☆

The Radiant Car Thy Sparrows Drew relies solely on its premise and its world design to carry it, instead of having any interesting characters or a solid plot at its base. I don’t think premise and world alone are enough to make a great story, though I may be biased in that I don’t find the world Catherynne M. Valente created to be that interesting. Maybe it’s the steampunk/futurepunk aesthetic that’s off putting to me, but I never really knew what the setting was in any given scene, or how the characters fit within the context of that setting. Every scene has a dream-like quality, untethered to any semblance of a consistent reality. Perhaps that’s what Valente was aiming for: a world detached from reality, with nothing to anchor its people down. If this was the intent, I don’t believe she succeeded, as I was mostly left confused instead of swept away in the whimsy.

I just feel like Valente may have been trying too hard in her attempts to convey a specific feeling to the reader. I would have much rather have lived this world through the eyes of specific characters, instead of through the narrator, who lays out the primary events of the story as if it were a documentary. It all feels a little pretentious to me. Nothing proves this more to me than the “twist”, wherein the narrator is actually the boy that Bysshe interacts with. The switch from a documentary to telling of the ramifications of Bysshe’s discoveries and disappearance is too sudden, with the resulting revelations feeling preachy and disconnected from the rest of the story. The only saving grace for The Radiant Car Thy Sparrows Drew could have been its world—specifically in regards to the callowhales—but it wasn’t enough to save it.

Link to Short Story

Conclusion

I enjoyed my experience with The Mammoth Book of SF Stories by Women, even though it took me quite a long time to finish it. While some of the stories didn’t feel worth my time, or didn’t fit my expectations coming into the book, I’ve come out of this collection with a list of authors I am eager to explore further, and I find myself once again appreciating female speculative fiction authors. I have always been a fan of female authors, as I find their works tend to be much more personable and focused on character. I consider this approach to writing incredibly compelling, as opposed to what I define as a “mansplaining” writing style—in which the author feels the need to explain everything to the reader from an objective perspective, including characters, settings and the world as a whole. This isn’t something limited to male authors, but I’d be lying if I didn’t say it’s one of the reasons I tend to dislike books by male authors.

In concept and in execution, The Mammoth Book of SF Stories by Women is a worthwhile reading experience. It proves why it’s important to showcase female authors, while simultaneously being entertaining in its own right. It’s a shame that I personally don’t enjoy short story anthologies; a distaste that was compounded by my compulsion to review each story individually. It only takes one bad reading experience to put me off reading for days, if not weeks sometimes. I also need some time after finishing each story to think on it, so this format doesn’t lend itself well to individual reviews, at least not for me. Despite my issues with completing the book, I enjoyed my time with The Mammoth Book of SF Stories by Women, and will definitely be revisiting some of my favourite stories in the future

Official Book Website