#piracy is always okay kids. remember that

[leclercsbf]

Charles Leclerc congratulating Carlos Sainz on his podium at the 2023 Monza Grand Prix

[punkascas]

okay, so i don't want to, like, Start Something or whatever so we're doing a barely-tagged, separate post. i also realise this is mostly pointless because others have already said what i'm going to say, and did it better, with far more grace, and sound less like an asshole than i do.

but jesus louise helen christ, the weird fucked up ideas people have around abuse and personal responsibility and the effect of trauma. like as an abuse and csa survivor, it genuinely alarms me to read posts that use arguments i remember my dad making. like, i'm assuming most of this rhetoric comes from gen z — maybe that's inaccurate; maybe that's unfair. but right now i'm very much Having A Moment Here that the kids aren't alright.

no 22-year-old should be repeating the same awful, manipulative, logically and morally bankrupt justifications for violence and torture my dad says. like literally what's in the first two episodes of ofmd s2 is torture.

i love ed; he's an amazing character. taika is hella wowza top marks acting him. but like.

like.

torture, my dude. physical and psychological. trauma. harassment. that we see the lasting effects of through s2.

just. i. what??

so here we go, okay. have too many, zealously highlighted screenshots so i can dig into details.

cut to save your dashes. content warning for discussions of abuse and trauma (if that wasn't obvious), as well as spoilers for ofmd s2.

re: ed knew what he was doing was wrong and felt guilty about it at the time:

we have no on-screen, textual examples of this. not in the dialogue; not in the acting; not in the blocking; not in the cinematography or music. nothing.

knowing the crew are overworked and kind of traumatised by all the violence, ed bribes them with cake. because, as we know, cake like tea fixes everything. only ed wasn't even with them to share in the eating of the cake. he made izzy responsible for that. he doesn't give the crew a break; he doesn't choose less ethically-fraught prizes to hunt. there is not one scene of ed talking directly to the crew — until he points a gun at each of them.

we see ed crying (and drinking, and rhino horn-ing [way to help further extinction, man]) but it's always paired with shots or flashbacks that reference stede. ed is still all up in his feelings about stede, and ed confirms this when he tells frenchie the myth about albatrosses never needing to return to land. ed cannot go back, does not want to go back, because he was rejected. (like, stede is literally landed gentry, come on!) all he wants to do instead is stay at sea committing to this unhinged version of unstable, sadistic piracy.

but okay, okay. say we ignore all of that. let's say ed does feel sorry and guilty and ashamed of his actions. he knows what he's doing is wrong and unfair and cruel. that it's harming others. that it's particularly harming the dude that ed has, for better or worse, basically spent his life with (izzy; i mean izzy). ed… still continues to do the things! how far off are we at this point from the definition of malicious? you know action x hurts person b and then you do it anyway. is that honestly a better, happier, more ethically defensible reading of the character?

re: the crew didn't mutiny because they love ed despite his violent, sadistic actions.

mutinies were a thing, yes. but both historically and in the world rules established by the show, mutiny is disincentivised through threats, distraction via extra work, and corporeal punishment. we see both ed and izzy use all three of these to try to prevent the crew from disobeying orders. they didn't wait until the storm and izzy shooting ed to mutiny because they understood or sympathised with ed; they took the chance to kill him then because that was the first real opportunity they'd had. the reward finally out-weighed the risk given that ed was going to kill them all that night anyway.

again, we have no scenes, no dialogue, no visual or audio cues to tell us that the crew understands or loves ed — excluding izzy, obviously. fang could also be on that list, if you take into account his personality and his behaviour both in s1 and later in s2 in the fishing boat scene. but in the first two episodes, we only see the crew show trauma responses around ed. they talk about him but almost never to him. and when they do have a direct conversation with ed, it is either confrontation or head down, submissive, "of course, blackbeard; anything you say" placating. i'm so baffled where the show points to any sign of love from the crew towards ed before his "death".

re: ed can't be held responsible because he was suicidal.

uhm. no. hard no. a harder no than stede's brazilian cherry wood mast. fucked up people do fucked up things but part of being an adult is owning your fucked-upped-ness and not fucking up others while you work on unfucking yourself. children, children are not fully responsible for the impact of their actions on others when they're deep in their feelings, especially if they're feeling their feelings as a trauma response. this is because literally their brain cannot do that kind of control. it doesn't have that software pack installed yet. ed does have all the adult updates installed, even if he isn't running them at that moment. he has no right to take out his feelings on other people: to maim them, to psychologically torture them, to abuse them, to work them to exhaustion. to kill them. he does not get a free pass to do suicide by abused employees. (like suicide by cop but more indirect and passive and harmful.) talk about passive aggressive.

secondly, ed is not just passively suicidal and happy to find new risks that might end his life. he is very purposefully taking izzy with him (see: literally removing the bits of izzy that would help let him walk away from ed; the fact that ed becomes actively suicidal only once he thinks izzy is dead; the whole keeping izzy's corpse in front of his and stede's beach shack i mean inn — the codependence, she runs deep). ed is also putting the crew through the same risks, the same isolation, the same danger. both stede and izzy agreed that ed had gone full scorched earth policy. you don't get forgiven for the murder part of a murder-suicide pact just because of the suicide part. not to mention that no one (once again, you could potentially argue izzy as an exception) was good on a murder-suicide pact with blackbeard.

and then to say the crew felt guilty? i assume i'm misreading that. the crew. felt guilty. for ed's actions. that is, if not victim blaming and if not darvo, a very close inbred cousin of them. like hapsburg jaw inbred close.

re: ed healing and his view of himself as a monster.

to heal means, in part, to accept responsibility for the harm you've caused, whether it was intentional or not. it means making amends. it means building or rebuilding relationships where possible. it means putting the other person or persons' feelings and boundaries and need for safety above your desire for absolution or forgiveness. it means working through your own guilt and shame and anger (or whatever drove you to act the way you did) in a separate space, not with the people you hurt, but someone who can be a step removed, more impersonal and objective to help you reflect and face hard truths as needed. i say this as both someone involved in activism and community reparations and as an abuse survivor who has done nearly 30 years of therapy learning this in order to not hurt people. it's not ed's fault he's fucked up just like it isn't my fault i am. but it is on me, like it is on anyone, to make sure i limited as much as possible the harm i can cause to others because i learned some awful but very effective tricks at a young age to survive.

ed does not really do any of the above. he doesn't say "sorry". he speaks in generalised language. he complains about the cat bell (which he seems to wear only for one day, given the implied timeline with lucius and pete's engagement). i have a model ship on a stand that says "this is a safe space ship" as a joke because i work for the government and have written press releases that sound just like ed's "apology". where you take no responsibility and encourage "the culture" to move on.

so, really, my question becomes: ed sees himself as a monster. in s1, we had enough balance between ed's current actions and his referenced past actions to see this belief as likely untrue. in s2 though — i mean, is it? is that an unfair or inaccurate belief? i can understand how carrying that belief can get in the way of ed's growth and eventual healing but like. from an outside perspective of ed-the-fictional-character. he's not a "good" person. he's capable of and has done and continued to do horrible, cruel things. ethically, can you argue with that statement about him?

re: ed trying to destroy relationships because of his self-worth issues and instead the consequences of his actions proving that he's loved.

this is the point that made me go: right, no, i need to respond. i need to say my piece about this. izzy and the crew suffering ed's violent tyranny and then sticking around on the revenge anyway afterwards is not a sign of love. it is not showing love to bear pain for someone. it not showing love to let someone mistreat you, threaten you, hurt you, maim you. their actions are selfish and done to give them feelings of power and control over you. lying back and thinking of england to get through it is not love. it is absolutely a survival technique. but it is not love when you do it at the expense of yourself or others.

i also disagree that ed was trying to push people away or break his relationships with others. we know from s1 that ed is fairly blasé about whether crew members die. again, we don't see any friendly or intimate exchanges between ed and any of the crew to imply any kind of relationship there beyond "tools who accomplish ed's goals". the one exception, as always, is izzy. and as previously stated, ed seems bound and determined, in a very conscious way, to bring izzy into death with him. ed does everything in his power to make izzy want to kill ed, or at least agree that it's best if ed dies, and to want to kill himself so ed doesn't have to die alone. that isn't ed breaking that relationship; it's making it permanent in a really fucked up shakespearian way. the only relationship we see ed waffle between wanting to keep and wanting to push away is stede. after his corporate "apology" and the fishing trip with fang, all of ed's dialogue is with stede and a little bit with zheng until izzy's death scene. the crew loving ed just isn't a thing, at least not one we're shown. not from either side. ed's relationships are with stede and kind of, sort of with izzy (because he does manage to, if not fully break, do some major damage to that).

love did not save ed. ed wanting to live, because stede came back, because he didn't want to jump off hornigold's cliff in the first place, saved ed. izzy saved everyone else.

so yeah: that's it; that's the post. the rhetoric that abuse is love or that abuse can be "cured" with love or that trauma isn't lasting and serious and has impacts on people's daily lives is just. wild. wild.

and terrifying.

my dad was born in the 40s. why is anyone born in the 80s or later still defending this mindset? it honestly, truly freaks me out.

guess it's good i have a fucking therapy appointment on monday.

[shamelessliarkickapow]

Arrvatarr! The Last Arrbender!

Just a little WIP

Zutara pirate AU inspired by THIS FUN ART by singswan-springswan and also THIS SWEET PIECE from the Zutara coloring book by fabdante

I have this whole story outlined at about 8 chapters. (*desperate promises to self* This definitely won't be another 100k word story, definitely. I'm aiming for 40k this time. Max.) I'm gonna try a new thing and post parts of chapters here as I go - no backward glances. Chapters will go on AO3 and ffn as they're completed.

Rating: M for violence and sexual content

Summary:

Set four years later than the show in an AU where the Avatar never returned. Instead of finding Aang, Katara and Sokka went looking for Hakoda and had lots of adventures. Fast forward to now, they’ve gathered a few motley friends into their life of piracy. Hey, it’s a living! After seven years circling the globe in search of the Avatar, Prince Zuko finds himself beset by weird pirates. They mean to ransom him, but the waterbender is distracting and Uncle Iroh seems to have some kind of plan so, if Zuko's lucky, this could all turn out okay... But when is Zuko ever lucky? A silly but pretty grown-up story with real swears and some sex stuff. Here be knavish pirate jokes and most ignoble puns - avast ye bilge-rat-vipers! yarrr

Chapter 1, part 1/3:

It was a junky little steamer, but beggars couldn’t be choosers and pirates loved junk.

They struck when the fat waning moon was still high, sparkling off the sea. Katara brought their little ship up from the depths alongside and raised it up on a mighty platform of ice to put their decks at a level for boarding. The wave of their emergence shook the steamer like a can of bees - but that hardly mattered when Sokka swung aboard and Toph dropped off his back. All the soldiers who came running half-dressed onto the deck wound up trapped, bound with strips of steel torn from the very vessel they sought to defend.

“Surrender, ya scabby seal-dogs!” Toph cried, striking a pose and really hamming up the drama. “Or I’ll paint this tub with yer stinkin’ guts before I sink ‘er!”

Most of the time, as soon as Toph broke out the metalbending, the fight was pretty much over. Suki was quick, so she could usually knock out a couple of soldiers before they realized how incredibly out-classed they were. Sokka had drawn his sword and found himself without an opponent so many times now that he usually just posed with it while he demanded surrender. Which was a shame - because it was such a nice sword.

Katara, always watching everybody’s backs, locked the ships together with thick bonds of ice and boarded last to come down hard on any remaining resistance. Tonight, though, she was still on the deck of their vessel, reassuring their new swab that nobody was going to get seriously hurt.

“She doesn’t mean it about the guts, Aang,” she said with a shrug and a crooked smile. “Toph just misses those earthbender tournaments she was telling you about. Remember, we do this to feed our villages through the winter. The Fire Nation can afford to be plundered a little after everything they’ve taken from us.”

This last she said with the faintest measure more steel. But the little monk didn’t notice. He only smiled trustingly up at her, his lemur clinging to his head with a grip on his bandanna.

“Aye aye, Cap’n,” he growled, a kid fully sold on the game.

“And what’s the rule?”

“No airbending - yarr!”

Katara grinned. “Great, now let’s go loot the boots off these guys.”

She took a few running steps and surfed the short distance up to the other ship’s deck, landing in a ready crouch with a tight stream of water looped through the air around her. There was no sound as Aang alighted behind her, but even if there had been, she would not have noticed.

Most of the time, these fights ended quickly. Firebenders weren’t at their best at night to start with. Soldiers rushed out, found themselves overwhelmed, and surrendered. The captain made an appearance and perhaps fought briefly, perhaps tried to rally his subordinates, but ultimately admitted defeat and gave up the goods.

But tonight was apparently a special night, because when Katara landed aboard the steamer, there was one firebender shouting and persistently unleashing all manner of fury in a three-on-one match against her friends.

He didn’t wear a uniform or even a shirt, just a pair of loose sleep pants as if he’d fallen from his bed into battle. And he seemed entirely ready for that battle, based on the way he spun and leapt and kicked unrelentingly in the air, dodging a chunk of metal from Toph even as he kept Suki and Sokka back with athletic moves and bright crests of flame.

Katara noticed at once that he didn’t look like a regular Fire Nation officer. His bared torso was all taut muscle - not that that was unusual, as many officers maintained their conditioning, it was more just… interesting. Drew the eye. No, it was his hair that marked him as peculiar. It was grown long past his shoulders and it fell loose and very straight around his scarred, snarling face. Most officers only kept their hair long enough for their military topknot. It might have occurred to Katara to wonder just what kind of captain this was, but presently, she was more interested in putting a stop to him.

Her water whip cut the air with only a chilling hiss for warning.

.

.

Zuko woke when he flopped hard off the edge of his bed onto the floor. A floor, he quickly realized through the fading disorientation of sleep, that was still swaying from some massive disturbance. He scrambled to his feet and craned his head to get a look out the wide, high window.

On the deck below, something was going on in the dark - but the strange ice that jutted up around his ship shone brilliant and deadly in the moonlight.

“Uncle!” he shouted as he slammed through his door into the hallway. “Uncle Iroh! We’re under attack!”

The old man was already emerging from his quarters, rubbing his bleary eyes. “What, did we hit something?”

“They have a waterbender,” Zuko snarled on his way to the stairs. “It must be pirates.”

“Pirates!” Iroh exclaimed, following at a sedate trot. “How terribly exciting!”

Zuko had leapt far enough down the stairs that he could pretend not to hear that last bit. Uncle had grown increasingly… whiny in recent years. He complained largely of the boredom of their life at sea, constantly trying to get Zuko to do something - anything else.

Hey, maybe we take a little break from searching for the Avatar and visit the colonies! I know a most pleasant spa where the masseuses could work the tension out of a stone. I think it might really change your perspective on things, my nephew. A man needs to release his tension every now and then, you know?

It was insufferable and uncomfortable and Zuko always dismissed the notion and stormed off to scan the horizon… but the old man had a point about the tedium. Zuko had circled the globe in his hunt for the Avatar - and then did it again, and again, until what he was doing was less hunting for the Avatar and more hunting for any kind of purpose or meaning in his life.

Because the Avatar was never going to return. That much had become obvious over the course of seven years spent searching ruins and sniffing out half-baked stories. What had not become obvious was what Zuko could possibly do instead, what other path to honor might remain open to him.

He was confident, however, that such a path would not be found in some thinly-veiled whorehouse in the colonies.

In truth, Zuko was no longer entirely sure he wanted to capture the Avatar even if one did appear. The chance to return home to his scheming, ruthless family no longer inspired in him the driving desperation he had felt when his banishment began. His sister was set to inherit the crown, presumably in half a century when Ozai succumbed to the inevitable fate of the terminally evil-and-wealthy and died peacefully in his sleep.

Meanwhile, Zuko had grown into a man in exile. A bitter and angry yet philosophical man deeply schooled in the arts of firebending, Pai Sho, and longing. Because what else was there to do?

Except, thankfully, finally, thrash a pack of pirates?

The only warning Zuko had about what awaited him on the deck was Lieutenant Jee, hanging by a strap of steel that had certainly not been affixed to the exterior door last night. “Prince Zuko,” he gasped against the pressure of the band, “it’s a metalbender.”

“Impossible,” Zuko managed - but the evidence was there before his eyes.

Beyond the open door, a girlish voice was cackling.

Zuko hurriedly kicked the restraint off his Lieutenant so the man fell free to the deck, then sent him off to rally the rest of the crew. “And get my uncle down here. Now!”

Then, bold and furious, Prince Zuko leapt out the door and reignited the lost fight.

The cackler turned out to be the metalbender, a muscular but petite girl - a teenager - whose smirk and hard postures bespoke unshakable confidence. At the instant of his appearance - almost as if she had sensed him coming and was waiting to do it - she moved through a sequence and ripped a sheet of the deck out from under Zuko’s bare feet. Or she would have, if he hadn’t hurled himself forward into a flip and come down in a roaring kick that crashed down a huge gout of flames. The metalbender blocked with another chunk of the deck.

“Stop tearing holes in my ship!” Zuko shouted, punching more blasts at her to try and flush her out of her shelter. While she was under cover, he blasted the restraints off a couple of his firebenders, then quickly went back on the offensive to cover their rise and return to combat.

“Get a real ship!” the little brat shouted from behind her shield. She shot a chunk of steel at him and he was forced to dodge even though she couldn’t possibly have seen him to aim. “This clunker’s more rust and barnacles than metal anyways!”

“Rrah!”

“Finally!” A lean man with a sword darted in to beset one of the freed firebenders. Zuko didn’t see the fight, but he saw the moment his soldier toppled over the gunwale with a cry. The swordsman grinned and shouted back toward the rigging of the pirate vessel Zuko only then realized was locked in alongside - that’s what all the ice was for. “Katara, you’re missing it! Captain’s out-! Woah!”

He went staggering back from the low arc of flame Zuko kicked in his direction. Zuko turned his whole attention back to bearing down with a sustained blaze on his first opponent. The metalbender was strong, but her technique was a little slow and, if Zuko hit her shield with enough heat, he suspected she might-

“Ow!” She tumbled out of the way, holding one hand close to her chest. “Why you bilge-sucking biscuit-burner! I’m gonna mash you good for that one!”

It happened as if in slow motion. Zuko had drawn back for a knock-out blow and was initiating the punch, but from the corner of his eye, he saw a golden flash and another figure moving rapidly toward him. He redirected his punch but was too late to do more than block the fan that had been about to strike him in the side of the head. The pale, painted face of a Kyoshi Warrior was suddenly there, looming like a specter out of the night.

She was much faster than the metalbender, and came at him with a lightning-quick sequence of jabs and slashes with her fans. For a moment, Zuko was hard-pressed to evade her attacks. She drove him a few steps until he stumbled over one of the torn places in the deck and went sprawling on his back. The warrior darted in-

-but Zuko wheeled his legs around in a dazzling circle of fire that sent her leaping back, blocking with those fans. He rode the kick to his feet and took the offensive, laying down a hard, quick series of blasts that had her backing up toward the pirate vessel, where the metalbender was one-handedly locking the last of his firebenders back down.

Zuko might have been annoyed, had he not been so busy almost getting skewered. The lean guy with the sword came up from his flank. If he had led with a stab, he might have ended the fight right there, but he tried to brain his enemy with the flat of his blade instead.

Zuko didn’t give it much thought as he ducked, darted in close to grab the guy’s sword-hand, and, with a grip on the front of his vaguely Water Tribey pirate jacket, pitched him bodily at the warrior. She was charging him with her fans out to either side and barely managed to dodge out of the way as the lean guy came hurtling past.

“Waugh-!”

Zuko kicked fire to keep her diverted and simultaneously ducked out of the way of another chunk of his ship that came hurtling toward him. He was about to press the advantage when a hissing sound cut the air, he felt a hard jolt of impact, and pain bloomed from his left pectoral like he’d been stung by a buzzard-wasp. He fell a couple steps back and took in this new opponent.

“The waterbender,” he growled, momentarily stunned.

TBC

[kyros-tha-soldier]

🏵️OP fathers day list🏵️

Hewwo, looks like I'm a bit late but happy father's day for all the dad's out there who love their kids (deadbeats Btfo we don't want you ugh) and a happy father's day for the actual one piece dilfs as well!

today i wanted to make a list for my beloved one piece papis!

Okay, let's go!

🦩 Doflamingo

i know, i know some of you are saying "ummm, who?" Yes, i agree, I'm a little biased on doffy, but hear me out. Doffy is a good dad, how? Why? The fact that he recruited kids is a bad thing, at least for irl standards, but he still cared for them, he knows that sugar is older than she looks yet he cares for her by assigning Trebol to protect her, also when he was making a toast, he gave Law, Baby 5 and Buffalo juice instead of wine. Now that's a good papi

🏰 Capone Bege

The Chad, the goat, the big father and the greatest mafioso daddy in this list, while Capone seems like a terrifying bloodthirsty gangster, he's an amazing husband and an even better father, always there for his kid, playing with him, entertaining him, and loving his wife, a real family guy!

🌊 Neptune

Cry-hoshi's (and her three brothers') father is also included in our list, yep yep! i figured that he needed to be recognized as a father more. What i liked about Neptune is that i liked how he's still loyal to his wife, but i kinda don't like how he sometimes looks weak willed, either way we Stan a mer-daddy!

🍊 Genzo

Most new OP fans may not remember him, but he's one of the Bravest civilians in one piece. He was there when Belle-mère and her daughters were attacked by Arlong and tried to defend them, making him get heavily injured resulting in his iconic scar and somewhat acted like a father figure for Nami when Belle-mère was gone (whomstdve make fun of him, he's precious and btfl 😤) he's now living his best life while following all of Nami's news and achievements.

💊 Hiriluk

Dr Hiriluk, one of the earliest father figures in OP, i liked how he went from treating chopper as a random deer, to an apprentice, to straight up treating him like his son (I'd do that too he's just super duper kyuttttte!) Sure he had his shenanigans and moments where he looked bad, but he's an overall good father figure for chopper, seeing how good he was to him and how he was the one who made him decide to become a doctor.

🍘 Sengoku

"no way, Sengoku has no kids!" ahem, did you forget that he literally adopted Corazon? We don't see much about them interacting, but from what we've seen Sengoku loved Rocinante as if he was his own child, he cared for him and would call him every now and then, and cried real hard when he died and at the end of Dressrosa when he was talking to law it felt like he held him real dear to his heart. Rocinante may have been a marine to the other admirals, but to him, he was his son.

🍳 Zeff

move over Judge, Sanji's real father is here!

He sacrificed his leg for Sanji, LITERALLY, just so the little boy won't die of hunger. And even after that, he ditched piracy and took him under his wing to teach him how to cook and be a real gentleman, he might've been harsh a little, but his heart is in the right place!

🍢 Oden

The true definition of the muscle brain trope, Oden is HUGE, kinda dum dum, he likes to goof around, extremely strong but has a soft spot for his family. He's a perfect family guy to his wife and kids, and despite all, he decided to put his family, disciples and friends at his top priorities, and that's why we totally Stan!

🏜️ Cobra

One of the OP characters that i didn't expect to be SO BRAVE for a non-fighting character. I like how he greatly cared for his daughter, but what i didn't like is how pervy he acts at times (bath scene) but other than that, he's such a beloved father, especially whenever he looked out for his daughter (along with Igaram), such a goof.

🐾 Kuma

We still don't know much about Kuma's past and his relationship with Bonney, why he chose to become a cyborg, why he's climbing the redline...etc etc. But from what Oda has shown us, Bonney loved him so much that she was willing to protect a pacifista since it reminded her of him, and ofc that speaks volumes about him.

🖤 Corazon

Ahhhhh, i remember how hard i cried during law's flashback when it first dropped in the manga, Corazon treated like as if he was his own son, he looked like an insane man at first when he kicked and beat buffalo and baby 5 (which i dunno, was uncalled for) but he's a really good father figure. He did all he could to save law, keep him entertained, made him food (they were grilling sweet potatoes in that one manga cover) and gave him all the love he needed. That is one hell of a reason for law to seek revenge against doffy!

🐋Whitebeard

Yep yep, Oyaji is here, i really like Whitebeard for how he would literally take any fatherless child (be them actually fatherless or just mentally) and make them his child. He's a VERY forgiving father as well, even when he got attacked by one of his sons, he just didn't hold it against him and forgave him. GOOOOOOOD that was sad af i cried!

🌻 Kyros

Once someone asks who's the best OP father the first person that comes to mind is Kyros. Trapped inside a toy's body, forgotten by everyone, if he tells his daughter who he is he will be thrown into the scrape heap, he had to organize a revolution. bro never took a break and ALL of this while taking care of his daughter! If this isn't one of OPs peak dad material then i dunno what he is!

And there you have it! The best OP dad's in my book!

Future dads? Take notes please!

[pi-roach]

remember kids, piracy is always okay from megacorperations and broadway

[devils-pirate-crew]

Dawson scoots over, scraping his stool along the floor, and presses himself to Dougie's side as the crew of the Sensibility and Jack's friends begin to chat. The pilot looks down at his mate, raising his eyebrows wordlessly, a silent question in his eyes.

The younger pirate sighs, running a hand through his hair - his fingers hook on the bandages, tugging at them a little bit, before he disentangles his hand from Marino's handiwork. So many questions run through his head, screamed at him by the Voices in words he can't understand. It's getting so loud. He can't remember any of it. "How are you doing?" he settles on. He doesn't notice how his voice wavers by the end of the question.

Dougie's eyebrows crease further together in concern. "I'm - Merce, are you okay?" Dougie's soft as always, quiet, tender even. It's part of why they work so well together - Dougie's a gentle giant with sadness in his eyes and mirth in his smile. Dawson's smaller, louder; he doesn't complain about his headaches, he just plasters on a grin and keeps going. No turning back. No surrender. We're all going into this watery grave together.

Footprints lined in crimson. Dawson blinks them away. "Yeah, I'm good." He takes another deep breath, trying to stabilize, stabilize, stabilize.

Dougie looks at his mate for a long moment, trying to decide whether he believes this or not. "Do you want anything?" he asks instead.

"We could go to the store later?" Dawson mumbles out. He likes going to stores when they're on land. Especially the specialists - the smiths, the jewelers, and more generally anyone in the business of trinkets. Dawson really likes trinkets. He learned the rules of piracy the hard way, that you're not allowed to take anything for yourself and that it has to go to the communal chests, because of trinkets. Siegs was not amused when he found out about the cache of shiny things Dawson had been hiding in his shore boots. It took the earnest pleading of Dougie, Nate, and Mikey to convince Nico to lay off the kid.

But sue him. He still always makes it a point to collect a few small things from every place they land - spoons, pendants, specialty items unique to the region. Hell, from time to time Dawson simply wanders on the beaches and picks up pretty shells. They're all kept in a small box by his bed, one carved with intricate, whirling designs and installed there by Akira.

Sometimes, Dawson finds special trinkets that he keeps in special parts of his small box. He tells himself that he's going to go home someday. He tells himself that when he goes home, he better have gifts ready for Riley and Jessica, for his mom and dad. He tells himself lies, as if he's ever going home, as if home exists anywhere but the Jersey Devil anymore, as if his family doesn't believe he died alone, a long, long time ago.

Dawson lies to himself as he sorts his little trinkets some nights, putting the rings and bracelets in one corner for his mother, the knives and Native crafts in another for his father, the spoons and pendants in the third for his sister, and the rocks and shells in the last for his brother. His mother always lamented how she'd never have jewelry, his father always talked about the strange savages in the New World, his sister always admired the hallmarks of the wealthy, and his brother always loved nature.

And by the time he's done sorting, there's nothing left in the middle for himself.

"Yeah," Dougie agrees softly, wrapping his arm around Dawson and pulling him into the older pirate's side. "We can go to the store later."

[adultswim2021]

Tim and Eric Awesome Show Great Job #46: “Lucky” | April 5, 2010 - 12:30AM | S05E06

We start this one off with a Kids Break. This time the kids are fully gothed-out. Tim’s trouble is that his father lost his job and now he resorts to eating his boogers as a meal replacement. This is especially disgusting and off-putting, so much so that when I watched this episode in VLC I bolted out of my chair to turn it off when the episode looped and this played for a second time. There might be worse Kid Breaks, but there also might not be. Hard to say! 

This one is one of my least favorite wraparounds: Tim has a “Musky Tusk” Necklace, which supposedly gives him good luck. You have to rub dead animals on it to activate it’s charms. They sorta dash this one off, being very disrespectful to their viewers. Hell, I got high for this one and not even that made me do smiles. They did get Ron Lynch to do a voice-over for a Musky Tusk pitch, which is the strongest part of the whole wraparound. I have a mild respect for them cutting to the closing credits early, but Space Ghost already did that, son. I hate how this one ends! 

Okay, sketches now. A sketch about Pierre using “dream cream”, a topical ointment you apply to your torso so you can have wonderful dreams. Pierre dreams that he’s hanging out with a beautiful boy and his dad. They have a cookout, where Pierre is slightly flirty with both of them. He only vocalizes his attraction to the dad, though. In one fairly dicey scene, Pierre hand feeds the boy various meats, including a hot dog. He’s also really pleased with the internet situation while looking at “sites for dads”, murmuring “megabytes per second must be in the billions!” Pierre’s dream eventually turns out to be a nightmare after the cream gets into his mouth, which you’re not supposed to let happen. 

This sketch actually wound up being a headache for Tim & Eric. The suggestively creepy things going on between Pierre and the boy in particular are a little squirmy. I always took the humor to simply be about Pierre being mindlessly inappropriate, and I don’t think the joke is supposed to be that he’s definitely a pedophile. He’s attracted to boys because it means a dad is nearby. That’s my take, anyway. But having a child present during a pseudo-sexual encounter is pretty eyebrow-raising.

This episode was actually briefly withdrawn from repeats because, I believe, the child actor’s parents weren’t pleased with the final sketch. I remember I actually attended an Adult Swim comic-con panel after this aired and somebody asked Tim & Eric why this episode hadn’t been rerun yet. Tim said it had something to do with being sloppy with paperwork, like they didn’t get a release signed properly or something. I vaguely recall Tim being asked about it on Office Hours and him saying something closer to what I’m alleging had happened.

My personal theory is that Tim & Eric were legally in the clear for the sketch, but just didn’t wanna upset the kid’s family and decided the moral thing to do would be to alter the sketch. So, they animated a disgusting-looking cartoon boy over the real kid to erase all traces of the child actor in the sketch. This is the version that is currently in circulation. It appeared on the DVD, and is streaming on Max. I managed to dig up a version originally sourced from Amazon, which apparently had the original cut available in HD for a brief moment. Thank piracy that it still exists.

This came back to haunt them in recent years. Pedo-panic got ramped up with shit like QAnon, and a lot of it was bogus and was wielded as a political tool. Sam Hyde’s fans in particular went after Tim & Eric, pointing towards stuff like this, and Steve Mahanahan’s child clown outlet sketches in particular. I was a fairly regular viewer of Tim Heidecker’s Office Hours, and I actually remember people calling in and trying to put Tim’s feet to the fire about this sketch. At one point one of them accused Tim of molesting his young neighbor; the kid who stabbed him while on drugs during the Tom Goes to the Mayor days. Tim actually hosted a special evening edition of his show to address this, when some Barstool Sports guy tried to pile on Tim and Eric for their child-clown related comedy.

Another recurring sketch: Lucky Duck, where Tim plays a downtrodden simpleton who winds up, through luck, getting minor upgrades during customer service situations. He’s served a large orange juice when he ordered a small, and the waitress lets him keep it. His economy hotel room is unavailable, so he gets upgraded to a regular room which includes a continental breakfast and complimentary orange juice. A very brief, seconds-long snippet of a would-be full-fledged third sketch showing him walking directly into a pool while a glass or orange juice sits in the foreground plays after the credits. This actually was meant to be a full scene, and can be found on the DVD (or on this youtube playlist).

The Lucky Duck bit is hysterical, but, uh, Tim is basically just playing a guy with downs syndrome. It’s extremely evident from his look. I sorta buy into the possibility that it’s almost a mistake. So many of Tim & Eric’s characters bump right up to the definition of being mentally disabled, but rarely do they actually read that way during shallow observation. I can envision Tim concocting this look, being drunk on laughter as it comes together, and that overpowering his sense of decency to not do it (or even think not to do it). Lotta people have been there, bro. I vaguely recall Tim referring to this on Office Hours and kinda tugged his collar as if he got away with something. He’s off scot-free, and I respect it. 

Last but not lease, this episode has the fairly funny Cinco Bro-oche, which is acted by the same company of men who did the eye-tanning sketch from whatever season that was. This one’s a bit of a rehash, in that all the same convoluted procedures for that are also required for this. It also involves installing a screw hole directly into your torso to screw the Bro-oche into. I do think this is the maybe the strongest version of this sketch. Such a pleasingly dumb concept, and little touches like calling the peace sign “the peace signal” really make me smile. 

Aside from the too-gross Kids Break, and the very lame wraparounds, this one has a lotta good in it. Lucky Duck and the Bro-Oche in particular are well-crafted, with the Dream Cream bit being a little sloppy, but with a lotta funny moments. That wraparound though is a Musky Bust.

MAIL BAG

I have to respectfully but strongly disagree with you about the Space Ghost room half episode. I thought it was hilarious and a much needed step up from the Gametap schlock. I loved everyone understandably hating the movie

I forgive you for disagreeing with me. I think I oversold my dislike of those bumpers. I liked 'em fine, really, and I wasn't being very generous by saying they were merely a cut above the GameTap episodes. They just didn't match my memories of the first time seeing them. It's more like splitting the difference between Gametap and an average episode of Coast to Coast. Plenty to like!

[blouisparadise]

Here are some amazing bottom Louis fics that were posted or completed during the month of June. We really hope you enjoy this list. Happy reading!

1) Effervescent Opal, Say My Name | Mature | 3463 words

Louis has an oversupply of milk after his first pregnancy and Harry wants nothing more than to suck him dry.

2) Tide's Deathless Death | Explicit | 4350 words

The Red Serpent gleamed in all of her marvellous glory from where she was anchored a meagre few miles away from the land. Her flag waving proudly in the afternoon sun. The image was certainly memorable, of the flag, that is; a serpent coiled viciously around a human heart, fangs sunken into the organ and blood oozing from the very spot. If not for the ship herself, the flag had its own repute of conveying the message that the captain was not to be trifled with.

There was no single man who had survived after taking up arms against the captain. Well, there was one man, but including him amongst the hoard of common faces would be a foolishness on the feared-by-all captain’s part.

That man currently stood silently staring after the captain, palm curled around the handle of his blade, and teeth clenched in anger. He was certainly going to relieve all the navies of their plight by taking down the captain. At least then, in his relatively newfound life of piracy, he would have done one good deed.

3) Nothing Even Matters (As Long As You’re Mine) | Explicit | 5826 words

“Nothing?” Harry can’t help the dry chuckle, running his free hand through his short, wavy hair, messing up his anteriorly perfectly styled locks. “I don’t think grinding on strangers is nothing.” His low, hoarse voice reverberates throughout the empty bathroom and he notes the slight shiver that courses through Louis’ body. The boy fidgets in place and squeezes his thighs together.

4) Is Ur Muffin Buttered? | Explicit | 7053 words

He knew what he was getting into when he began to hook up with Harry Styles. How could he not? Everyone on campus knew about him, the type of player he was, ready to break hearts and beds and all that. But it wasn’t as if he had planned the mess he was getting into it, at least not in the beginning.

5) Taking The Long Way Home | Mature | 12499 words

The line is quiet for a moment before the man asks. “What kind of car you got, honey?” “Uh,” Whether it’s from the pet name or the question, his brain freezes for a second. “It’s pink.”

The man huffs out a laugh. “That doesn’t tell me much, love.” “Sorry, I don’t know cars well.”

The man hums, before saying. “Tell you what, i’ll come out there and get ya, then we’ll talk about the charge on the way back.”

“Really?” He asks. “That’d be amazing.”

“It might take me a minute to get out there, at least thirty or forty. So just sit tight.”

“Alright, thank you. I really appreciate it.” He does a little victory dance in his seat. “My names Louis’ by the way.”

“I’ll see you soon, Louis.”

6) Bundles Of Pride | Teen & Up | 12796 words 

As far as Louis can remember, Harry has always been extremely vocal about his feelings, always making sure to remind him he loves him. It could be overwhelming at times, but endearing most of the time and Louis picked up on the habit as well. Now, married with three kids, the love is only tripled, and thus even if they do have a teenager in a somewhat rebellious phase who is starting to venture the relationship scene - meaning he is trying to distance himself from his parents. Harry finds it amusing while Louis is trying to be okay watching his boy grow and go through the motions the way he once did.

7) Baby, You're The End Of June | Explicit | 13684 words

“Up for it, Harold? We can go over the rundown when we get back. If you’re not busy then.”

“Yeah, sounds good,” Harry says, closing his laptop and setting it on Louis’ desk. “It’s just Harry, though.”

“You look like a Harold,” Louis says, standing up and brushing some brownie crumbs off his t-shirt. Harry briefly wonders how he’s still hungry for lunch after demolishing half the plate of brownies as he stands and moves into the hallway. “It’s the cardigan, I think.”

“You guys can flirt on the way,” Niall says over his shoulder, beckoning for them to follow him as he strides down the row of cubicles. “Come on, I’m starving.”

Harry looks at Louis, but he just laughs as they follow Niall. Oh. He thought he’d been picking up a vibe while they hung out, but apparently not. Well, it’s better to know how Louis feels now, so he can nip his growing crush in the bud. Louis is a great guy, at least they can be friends as well as coworkers.

8) Three's A Crowd, Four's A Party | Mature | 16569 words

"Morgan, sweetie, mommy and daddy have something we want to talk to you about."

The little girl looks at them confused, having no idea what's about to happen.

"First I want to tell you that we love you very much and nothing will ever change that, okay?"

"I love you too!"

Louis smiles. "What we wanted to talk to you about is that there's going to be some changes around here soon."

"Why?"

"Because mommy's having a baby."

9) Angel Of Small Death And The Murder Scene | Explicit | 20634 words

Ever since Louis read about the new up and coming Detective in town, he had immediately disliked the man, despite never having met him. So, naturally, it can only be the worst thing that could have happened to Louis when he gets stuck with Detective Styles trying to solve a murder during his supposed to be relaxing vacation over the seas.

10) Lonely Shadow Dancers | Explicit | 20838 words

“Mm,” Harry’s arms circle him, and their fumbling somehow turns into a cuddle session, “still can’t believe we’re here together.”

Growing up with someone, one tends to become used to another. Used to the mannerisms and personality of them. Used to the changes and the things that stay the same.

Harry hit puberty and sprung up into this cheeky curly flirt of an alpha and Louis still hasn’t found the time to get used to it. His stomach flutters and he bites back a stupid smile and wonders if he ever will.

11) Worth the Wait | Explicit | 29262 words

In all the words Louis would use to describe a baby shower, the last one he’d ever thought to use was depressing.

12) You Fill My Lungs With Sweetness (Can I Be Close to You?) | Explicit | 29884 words

Busy picturing Harry’s stupid face on the stupid dummy, Louis goes through a series of kicks before returning to a low guard and cycling through punches. Harry’s still talking, gesturing with his hands as he rounds Louis, standing to his back. “You do a few butt-shaping exercises, tighten this up a little bit,” he smacks Louis’ arse and the omega freezes while Harry cheerfully continues, “you could pull this off.”

“You know what?” Louis snaps, lifting on his tiptoes to get the leverage so he can wrap his arm around the alpha’s neck, forcing him to bend in half while Louis locks him in a chokehold. “Pull this off,” he snarls. They stagger over a few steps, Louis gritting his teeth as Harry tries to break free. “Is it because Payne hates me?” he complains, voice edging on an annoyed whine, “Or is it, like, an omega thing?”

Too late, Louis realizes that Harry has got a grip on his leg and this time as he pulls against Louis’ hold, it loosens, the alpha lifting him in the air before slamming his back into the mat, breaking Louis’ grip completely. Harry kneels on the mat, hovering over him with a sneer, “Don’t kid yourself. Nobody thinks of you that way.”

13) Code Blue | Teen & Up | 40546 words

During their last show, Louis, unexpectedly, passes out backstage. When he comes to, Harry forces him to go to the hospital. What the doctors find is about to change their lives forever.

14) Insane | Mature | 47013 words

"Did you hear that? "

Truth or dare is said to be a fun, innocent game played among children and young adults at parties or with friends, so no one expected two high-school boys' lives to be at risk all because of one stupid dare.

15) Home Is Where The Heart Is (But God, I Love The English) | Explicit | 47458 words

“Niall, there is absolutely no bloody way your club shelled out over £400,000 to have Harry Styles ugly mug plastered all over London’s bus stops.” Louis scowls from the passenger seat as their car flies by yet another bus stop with his sworn enemy’s face on it.

“Harry was a proper diva that day too,” Niall fondly reminisces of the alpha. “Kept demanding they redo his hair and swatting away any of the players who touched it.”

“They could've done his hair six ways to Sunday and he still wouldn’t look any more attractive than some bigheaded giraffe type,” Louis continues on his tirade, hoping to get his best mate to commiserate with him, but it’s becoming increasingly far-fetched, especially since said best mate is also on the same football team as said giraffe.

16) Heat Wave | Mature | 64100 words

Italy, 2018. Summer in Italy is sticky, especially in Marina di Pietrasanta. Louis Tomlinson, a soft and independent omega, goes to spend his holidays there with his daughter Alice. He has rented a vacation home built on a large estate owned by one Harry Styles, a kind-hearted alpha who is not very fond of children, but he tries.

A lot can happen in fifteen days.

17) These Still Waters Run Deep | Explicit | 64602 words

“You and your brother are very different in that way,” Louis hums, noticing the subtle tick in the alpha’s jaw.

“Andrew and I are different in many ways,” he states, nostrils flaring the slightest.

Louis sighs from his nose. “I have never been one to conform to the conventional standards of royal morals. They’ve placed me in a box that I do not fit in, leaving me always wanting what I cannot have. It’s natural, at this point, to hold my words and pray everything blows over without a fuss.”

“You are free to speak as you wish,” Harry says intently, the ‘with me’ goes unsaid but it’s there, reassuring. “What do you want, Louis?”

Clacking hooves outside the house and the whinny of the horses for their carriage are loud in the silence as Louis thinks, staring at the alpha painted in orange and yellow and thinking ‘you’—knowledgeable and confident and willing to speak. I want to be like you. I want you.

18) Late Nights And Good Intentions | Explicit | 71808 words

“About last night,” Harry says suddenly, as if he’d been debating on whether to say anything. Louis whips back around to look at him.

“Do not finish that thought,” Louis says just as abruptly.

Harry looks at him oddly, as if assessing him. With a small frown, it seems the assessment is over. “I only wish to say that you do not have to dwell on it. The rest of the men will surely forget by tonight.”

“And you?” Louis asks, raising an eyebrow. “Will you forget?”

“I will remember every second of it fondly,” the Lord says, no trace of a tease in his words.

19) Lost & Found In Oblivion | Explicit | 74779 words

Everything wasn’t at all like he had planned. He was supposed to answer the door calmly and coolly, like a proper experienced adult dressed in protective hoodie and joggers. Not like this. But this was what he had and he had no choice but to roll with it.

“I fucking paid for this, didn’t I?” Louis muttered to himself and took a huge inhale.

20) Cherry Red And Gloomy Blue | Explicit | 94940 words

There was an alpha in his kitchen.

There was an alpha in his kitchen and he was in his panties and he reeked of sweat. Oh my God, he thought, what—

Suddenly, their eyes met. A strangled sound came out of Louis’ mouth as he got caught staring, his lips still parted as he scrambled to find something, anything, to say. The alpha preceded him.

“Cazzo,” he cussed, the glass he was holding in one of his hands almost slipping from it. He looked as surprised as Louis felt.

21) Locked Hearts | Explicit |100486 words

England, 1840. Triggered by a heart filled with ambition, the powerful Pack Alpha Harry Styles decides to create an alliance with the neighboring pack through marriage. The de Winters, having heard of Styles’ reputation as a charming yet abusive lover, refuse to put their only omega son through a life of misery—although they have no qualms coming up with a plan to make the advantageous alliance happen, even if it means subjecting someone else to that fate.

Enters Louis Tomlinson, a servant with a pitiful past who, against his wish, finds himself roped into a dangerous scheme that might very well cost his life in the end.

22) Sweet Lou | Explicit | 115949 words

The Sweet Lou is a mafia romance between Louis and Harry. Louis is the son of a mafia don, and Harry heads his own crime family. Though he's destined to marry Louis’ sister, they can't escape their obvious connection.

Check out our other fic rec lists by category here and by title here.

You can find other monthly roundup fic rec lists here.

[derivativealigner]

I rewatched the second season of South Park and took so many notes that I had to split them into two parts. Like seriously, I took so. many. notes. And pictures this time. I started rewatching just in case I’d find some cool little facts to sprinkle into my fanfic but I went way too far and now there’s a million facts under this cut (including gay stan, a domestic violence psa, and craig fucking dying)

Stan doesn’t like hospitals, he finds them gross and he gets sick 🤮. Also the hospital in South Park is called Hell’s Pass hospital. Early seasons have the name as Hells Pass but it gets fixed later

Cartman has to sing all of Come Sailing Away by Styx if he hears a part of it. After he says this, Kyle sings the first part and Cartman has to sing the rest. Kyle does it again later, which is kinda mean

Cartman’s mom tries to abort Cartman, who is an eight-year-old child and thus cannot be legally aborted. Later, after she slept with Bill Clinton to change the law and make 40th trimester abortions legal, it turns out she meant adoption

Kenny sacrifices himself to turn on the generator to the hospital and save Dr. Mephesto’s life along with others. He says “I’ll fucking do it” then does it and dies, absolute legend

Cartman gets way too into his deputy role. He goes undercover, pretends to be a prostitute, says “Respect my authoritah!” a lot and beats people up with his police stick

Kenny’s brother first appears when Cartman responds to a call about a disturbance at Kenny’s house. Apparently there are like 10 adult family members in the house at that time. Kenny’s dad has a black eye because Kenny’s mom punched him. She says he can’t hold a job

Token sits in the classroom in season 2

Cartman starts hating hippies in this season, like a lot

Chef tells the boys that the right time to do drugs is in college

Ike’s name is Ike Moisha Broflovski and he was born in 1996, making him 2 years old in 1998 when this season aired

This is probably obvious but yeah Kyle and Ike are circumcised

Kyle says family isn’t just blood, it’s who you care about, and he says “That’s why you guys are more than just friends, you’re my family. Except for Cartman.”

Craig’s finally sitting in the classroom in S02E04

None of the boys like dodgeball

Clyde gets a dodgeball to the face and he cries :( and he’s the only one who cries by the way

Pip throws a dodgeball in Kyle’s face and breaks Kyle’s nose

When Kyle’s mom tells the boys about conjoined twin myslexia (which isn’t a real term) and says anyone might’ve absorbed their dead twin in the womb, Stan and Cartman run away screaming but Kenny and Kyle stay to listen. Kenny even leans in to look at the book “Freaks A-Z!” that Mrs. Broflovski is reading from, and when she leaves, Kyle grimaces and Kenny laughs

Stan’s mom (Sharon) calls Kyle’s mom (Sheila) when Stan is all freaked out and trying to put an icepick through his brain, and Sharon tells Sheila to get run over by a truck. Sharon is pretty mean in these early episodes

Mr. Broflovski doesn’t really listen to what Mrs. Broflovski is saying, bad husband >:(

South Park’s team is always called South Park Cows no matter the sport

The school nurse, Nurse Gollum, went to Colorado State University

I just realized Butters exists. I think he appeared before S02E05 but I didn’t notice but yeah he’s there with the dodgeball team, injured

Here’s a picture to make up for my disgusting anti-Butters bias

Kenny’s dodgeball uniform number is 69 obviously. Kyle is 7, Stan is 4, Cartman is 325

Sheila smacks Gerald in the face so hard he falls off his chair, lots of violence perpetrated by women in this show. Remember, don’t do domestic violence no matter your gender, it’s not cool

I realized after this whole Butters thing that I should’ve made more notes about Pip, so I’ll make a note about his anger issues now. When people call him French, he gets angry and throws dodgeballs at them

The boys launch a jelly roll at Ms. Crabtree and make her crash the bus. They do it just for fun

The kids somehow go to China in the school bus

Cartman references Moby Dick, but he probably doesn’t know what he’s talking about

Kevin Stoley gets named in S02E05 and has his first speaking role when he says he has Chinese parents and after Cartman hears it he immediately says something racist. smh cartman, what a problematic fave

Cartman says “I love you guys 😊” but Stan and Kyle just stare at him and he goes 😐 “Eh, screw you guys 😠”

If Jimbo and Ned really fought in Vietnam, they youngest they could’ve been in 1998 is early forties, which means in the latest seasons they would be early sixties. Btw they met in Vietman

Jesus and Pals is a recurring TV show in seasons 1 and 2. Jesus just kind of lives in South Park

I just remembered that Terrance and Phillip are really old in canon, it’s so weird, like how can South Park canon still be changing, it’s been 20 years

Also the early seasons are casually racist who knew

Kenny flashes his ass on a tape the boys send to Jimbo and Ned’s TV show, which airs and at least 12 people see Kenny’s bare naked ass

Cartman really doesn’t like hippies in these early seasons. He throws a chair at Ned and yells, “Take that, hippie!” (Ned is in a catatonic state and did nothing to provoke this)

Jimbo and Ned live together I guess. Jimbo’s gonna take Ned home and show him some hardcore porn to snap him out of his catatonic state, good husband unlike Gerald Broflovski

Saddam Hussein is in hell and has a Canadian accent and is Satan’s lover in S02E06, I guess he died in Canada in the first episode this season but I wasn’t paying much attention since that’s the Terrance and Phillip episode that pissed a bunch of people off in 1998 because the audience wanted to know who Cartman’s dad is instead. It was kind of a boring episode so I understand why everyone was pissed, but it is funny that Matt and Trey did that so I’m not mad about it

Aww look at them!!! We’ve got background Style, the vaguest inkling of Crenny, and Cartman/Cake

I’d take more screenshots but it’s a pain since I’m watching legally and stupid legal websites block screenshots so I have to find youtube videos instead ughhhh piracy is the answer kids

Apparently there’s a huge waterfall and canyon somewhere close to South Park, maybe? At least in Stan’s dream

Mary Kay Bergman was an incredible voice actor. How the hell did she voice all the moms, Wendy, Shelly, principle Victoria, the mayor, Nurse Gollum, and fucking Ms. Crabtree??? Holy shit what a queen

Kenny has some feelings about death. He reimagines the episode where death boops him to death and in his version, he beats death the fuck up, then has ice cream and is happy 😊 But again, this is in Stan’s dream

S02E07 kind of establishes that nobody remembers Kenny dying because when Cartman tells a story where Kenny dies, Kyle questions how Kenny could’ve died then when he also died just a few hours ago when a giant monster took him

rip craig, he falls out the bus and into a canyon

But it’s okay because it was all Stan’s dream so everything in the episode is questionable. Everything after this is no longer a dream

Pip’s parents are dead and he has to go to summer school while everyone else is having a nice summer break

Officer Barbrady and the mayor are having sexual relations, I’m sure this is the most interesting note I’ve made so far. Idk I’m just writing everything down, this is how I enjoy things, I have no off switch

Ew summer bus stop, cursed

Kyle casually sings little tunes every once in a while, how cute

This is pretty obvious but Kenny likes dirty jokes, he laughs when Cartman innocently says he loves Chef’s salty chocolate balls (which are chocolate candy). Nobody else laughs

Cartman says “Screw you guys, I’m going home” or variations of it a lot in this season

So Stan throws up when he likes someone, right? Well, he’s watching an indie movie about two gay cowboys who start making out and he throws up, which is either a terrible homophobic joke or confirmation that Stan’s a little gay. I know which one I prefer

Kyle says Mr. Hankey is his best friend after Stan. Like I know it’s definitely canon that Stan and Kyle are best friends but it’s still nice to see confirmation, it’s very precious. Also Kyle is best friends with literal shit, so cute 😊

Kenny deaths:

S02E02 Kenny sacrifices himself by connecting a generator wire, which electrocutes him but brings power back to a hospital

S02E03 A tree falls on Kenny and crushes him

S02E04 Kenny falls in a grave and the gravestone falls on him

S02E05 The Chinese dodgeball team throws a ball at Kenny and he gets splattered against a wall

S02E06 Two guys pull on Kenny and tear him in half, as in one has the head and one has the legs

S02E07 A big scary monster plucks Kenny out of the school bus and carries him away. Also in Cartman’s fake memory of Fonzi jumping over cars, the motorcycle hits Kenny and crushes him against a brick wall. Kenny gets smashed against walls a lot, doesn’t he?

S02E08 Flashback: Baby Kenny has a firecracker and it explodes, sprinkling little baby Kenny parts everywhere. Later in the episode, current day Kenny dies when a giant firework snake bumps him off a stage and under a fence, which then crushes him.

S02E09 Kenny is playing with a yoyo outside a movie theatre when a bunch of people come outside and trample him to death. They say “Oh my God, I found a penny!” and “You bastard!”

I’ll post part 2 of season 2 in a couple days. I’m having way more fun writing these stupid notes than I thought I would (also gnomes is coming up soon and i am fucking ready for tweek)

[lostinwoods]

A satire of How the Inuyasha world went to shit and Yashahime happened!

Before anyone reads any further, there are certain warnings.

Warnings: Mentions of the rainbow pearl being a secret porn stash with nefarious powers. Pedomaru is an imposter.

Trigger: Depicts trauma of an underage Rin. 

A poorly made imagine by an enraged fan, where only Sunrise Pedomaru ( read imposter) is a piece of shit but the rest are moral characters.

Note: Do not be like Pedomaru. Be moral, do not follow porn logic! I honestly did not want to but I realised there is no other sane way to somewhat absolve Sesshoumaru-sama and simultaneously keep it trashacanon. So, blame the plot!

-----How the conversations might have happened back then-----

Kirinmaru- Hey, you Naraku! I gave you life even after having severe case of racism... You have an important mission to complete.

Naraku- Kukuku.... I am the great Naraku-sama. Who do you think you are to make me your underling?

Kirinmaru- The dude who sent the demons materializing in your body. I am the one who turned you half!

Naraku- Fuck you! I am not your slave.

Kirinmaru- *grits teeth* Okay, fine, you youngsters don't know how to work without taking bribes. I would give you the chance to regain the Shikon and would allow your one wish upon it!

Naraku- *Smirks* All according to plan!

Naraku- So, what would you have me do?

Kirinmaru- Do anything, I mean anything but keep away that demon named Sesshoumaru from his home.

Naraku- Why?

Kirinmaru- *Inhales slowly* That guy's got a collection of pedophilia porn stash there, hidden in two rainbow pearls. He is not....and I repeat not to be allowed near his house and most importantly that porn stash.

Naraku- Why?

Zero- Because the Shikon has told me that there would be a union which would be a catastroph in making.

Naraku- So?

Zero- You dimwit, there would be Kids' as a result of his pedophilic relation with his human ward. Even we demons do not support such notions!

Naraku- Wow, never thought a guy could be more twisted than me.

Kirinmaru and Zero- No kidding! Just know that the union should not happen!

-------- 8 years later after Naraku's death-------

What no one will ever know is that the real Sesshoumaru was being kept captive in an underground dungeon and his twin brother, Pedomaru (a sick twisted pedophilic fuck) was postering as him and taking his place after Naraku’s end. He took the rainbow pearls the original Sesshoumaru was keeping away from him.

Zero- Bro, bro... Wake up! Sesshoumaru (she doesn't know he is an imposter) defeated Naraku and now he is spending time watching his porn stash and preparing gifts for his human ward.

Kirinmaru- *Slurs, half asleep* Ya? Go and burn 'em down and keep that kid away from him.

Zero- Yes bro, Imma on my way!

Zero- *Sends Root-head to cause havoc and distract Sesshoumaru. Meanwhile, she flies to his sky castle and steals the rsinbow pearls*.

-----Another 2 years later------

Zero- Bro, wake up! Terrible news, Sesshoumaru's gonna be a dad!

Kirinmaru- *Sits up straight and wears his horse mask to hide the disgust on his handsome face* Keep the kids away from the pearls at all cost!

Zero- Okay, on my way.

------10 mins later-----

Zero- I should have never allowed you near that porn stash. I am a terrible failure of an aunt!

Pedomaru- Zero!

Zero- Oh, you remember my name.

Pedomaru- How could I not. You have no clue what you did. I was on my last episode of 'Boku no Pico' and you took them down. I did not even get to know whether they....

Zero- *Eyes almost falling out of its sockets* Not only Loli but Shota as well??? You are the scum of this century!

Pedomaru- *Smirks* And that got me kids.

Zero- *Smirks* And the rainbow pearls with me!

-----Meanwhile on the other side----

Riku: Kagome-sama? You are the leg. Shikon priestess correct?

Kagome: Yes, I am!

Riku: I am Riku and I am a pirate.

Kagome: Yeah and I am the destroyer of Naraku and also an awesome time traveler. But such things are rocket science to you, Mr. unreliable narrator.

Riku: So, there's gonna be a comet and it's gonna bring calamity. Thus it should be destroyed by the inu brothers.

Kagome: Sure...... Because comets can also do other things...you know things other than setting the ground on fire or creating a hole on the ground... you know, like bringing literal darkness.

Kagome: Oh and Mr. Unreliable narrator, have you heard that my bro-in-law is a major creep who actually had sex with his daughter figure. I am sure the comet can do nothing more terrible.

------10 mins. Later. In a hut----

Inhabitants collectively: God, we should have seen this coming.

Kagome: Yeah, why didn't I take that tongue twister seriously?

Sango: Man, you telling me I have to see this shit happening to a girl the same age I was when I started slaying demons? I had hoped nothing worse could happen to a girl my age, think I jinxed it!

Kaede: Poor Rin!

Rin: *After birthing for several hours* Huh, only if I was an adult, I could have actually given birth without going through two miscarriages in the last two years.

Kagome and Sango: Sorry Rin, we should have never allowed you to go and stay at his palace for those two years. Back then we thought that he was your caring father figure. But, that bastard actually showed you such crap porn and coerced your consent! Rin, you should have reached out to us faster, at the time when he had started those things!

Rin: *With silent tears in her eyes* Yes, back then I did not understand anything. But I started understanding after my second miscarriage. Thus I sent Inuyasha-Sama that SOS. I am only thankful that he barged as my saviour at the right time! The least I could have asked for at this point is healthy kids. They look so beautiful. Finally I can hold them in my....

Pedomaru: *Saunters in and picks up the kids* They need to pass the rite of courage and cowardice.

Rin and the rest: Fuck you too asshole! You dare take them away with a shit like pass some rite. Keep your disgusting hand off them. Get outta here! Right this moment!

Jaken: *Tearfully* I will take care of the rest!

Rin: *Wails mournfully* I lost them again. The one time I could see them with my eyes, that nymphomaniac takes 'em away. Should have listened to Master Ungai back then!

-----In a forest----

Pedomaru: *Places the bundles of the kids on the ground and whips out the rainbow pearls holding his secret porn stash. Then he inserts said jewels in the eyes of each girl*

Jaken: *Erects a barrier that could easily be seen through by Zero* 

Zero: I order you to burn that place down. I am sure he's got some of his stash hiding in that tree. Get the kids away but do not forget to remove 'em, the main stash's in the kids' eyes.

------In a certain Shrine----

Kagome: *Kisses her daughter's forehead and hands her a beni* We had always decided that if we ever had a daughter, we would give her this beni. Keep this with you Moroha, it is an anti-pedo lipstick. It will keep you safe from your piece of a shit uncle.

Inuyasha: *Unsheaths Tessaiga* Kagome, the Pedo and his boytoy's here!

Pedomaru: *Zooms past Kirinmaru and digs into Inuyasha's eye and fishes out a black pearl* Finally found the secret porn stash of Dad. I had always wanted to get to this. Finally! *Seals off InuKag in the pearl and turns towards Kirinmaru* I hope this is fine. Let them watch some porn and educate themselves!

Kirinmaru: * Resets his mask lest it slips off and shows his disgusted face* Well, I guess it's fine for now!

Kirinmaru continues to side eye Pedomaru all the while ploting how to get rid of those porn stashes.

He returns to his abode and speedily creates some underlings.

Kirinmaru to underlings: I order you all to collect the rainbow pearls that are scattered around the continent. Remember, do not look inside them and never use them. They are weapons of great caliber.

Underling 1: *In a nasaly voice* Kirinmaru-sama what is in those pearls.

Kirinmaru: Listen carefully because I would say it once. Those pearls are secret porn stashes of dubious content. They should be removed at all cost. Find them and bring them to me. Oh, and never allow Riku to get a hold of them. That boy has already lost his articulate power of narration after he began that black market piracy of the rainbow-pearl porn stash.

The underlings all shouted in sync: Yes, understood Kirinmaru-sama!

And thus began Yashahime: A tale of twins who embark on a journey to save the world from the rainbow pearls and their wrath!

We sincerely hope they could choose their boat carefully! And the real Sesshoumaru is brought to justice. RIP Pedomaru, the imposter!

[emiline-northeto]

2) 📝 book that everyone has to read, 7) 🛋 book that keep you up all night, 8) 🎁 book that was surprisingly good, 13) 🎥 favourite book to movie/tv show adaptation, 17) 🌎 favourite fictional world, 29) 🥊 character you’d punch in the face

2) 📝 book that everyone has to read

Of the things I’ve read or re-read recently:

A Memory Called Empire by Arkady Martine – Space! Diplomacy! Interesting linguistic things! Politicking! Mystery! Interesting things about empire and colonialism! (also I just finished the sequel, A Desolation Called Peace and it was also excellent)

Last Night at The Telegraph Club by Malinda Lo – I’m still trying to figure out how to put in to words how much I liked this book but it was so good and I wish there were more queer historical fiction books like it. It also does have a happy ending.

Perennial rec:

I talk about Connie Willis a lot and that’s not going to stop now: To Say Nothing of the Dog which is delightful and charming and very funny. Hijinks and shenanagins and romance and plot twists, and if you like Jeeves and Wooster or that sort of style of things you’ll probably like this.

7) 🛋 book that kept you up all night

Doomsday Book by Connie Willis - part of her Oxford Time Travel series and can stand alone, an undergraduate historian is supposed to travel back in time to 1320, accidentally ends up in the period of the Black Death. It’s so good and it kept me up because I had to find out if everyone was going to be okay, and I still think about this book. It is not however, necessarily a good book for the current times unless reading about plagues is something that’s helping you deal with things right now.

8) 🎁 book that was surprisingly good

Meet Cute Club, by Jack Harbon. I’d heard very good things but I wasn’t sure if I’d personally like it because I haven’t entirely figured out what I like in contemporary romance, and I don’t think I’ve read any other contemporary m/m. It was pretty good though, and I enjoyed it.

13) 🎥 favourite book to movie/tv show adaptation

The Remains of the Day. It’s such a good adaptation, and I’m always so impressed by how well they did adapting a book that is entirely in first-person narration and has remarkably little dialogue all things considered, and turned it into such a faithful adaptation. It’s not entirely the same of course but ahhh, it’s so good and it captures so much of the story anyway, and it’s just absolutely gorgeous.

Honorable mentions to the 1995 Pride and Prejudice, the Emma Thompson Sense and Sensibility, and Miss Pettigrew Lives for a Day

Also, in terms of adaptation that’s least like the book, The Princess Diaries movies, especially the second one. I can’t remember now if I ever read further than the first book in the series but I did not like those books at all, and I adore PD2.

17) 🌎 favourite fictional world

Ooh, this is such an interesting question, and there’s so many ways to approach it. I think I’m going to for now go with the world in Lois McMaster Bujold’s Challion series not because the world itself is a particularly kind or egalitarian one (it’s definitely not), but because she has created such an interesting theology and the way that people interact with their gods and their gods interact with them I find quite fascinating.

29) 🥊 character you’d punch in the face

When I was younger, Holden Caulfield from The Catcher in the Rye. Now, definitely Charles Wilcox from Howards End. What a jerk.

40) 🏰 favourite historical fiction book

I definitely cannot pick just one here,

·      The Witch of Blackbird Pond by Elizabeth George Speare (I had a used copy as a kid and I read it so many times it literally fell apart)

·      The Remains of the Day by Kazuo Ishiguro

·      The Lady’s Guide to Petticoats and Piracy by Mackenzie Lee

·      Last Night at the Telegraph Club by Malinda Lo

·      Brother Cadfael series by Ellis Peters (historical mysteries)

·      The Kopp Sisters series by Amy Stewart

·      Shadow of the Moon by MM Kaye (I didn’t do content warnings on the others but I’m putting a significant racism and colonialism cw on this one.)

Send me an emoji book ask

[jonghoshoe]

Hearts Awakened, Love Afraid

Proofreading? idk her, I almost lost this entire fic I refuse to read through it all rn.

Summary: Seonghwa hasn't had a letter from Hongjoong in weeks, he finds out why.

Pairing: Seonghwa x Hongjoong, side Wooyoung x Yeosang

Word Count: I finally hit 3k words :)

Contains: I honestly don't know what to put. It starts okay but gets sad real fast, there’s death and mentions of blood, homophobia, references to suicide ig? Maybe a descent into madness too.

It’s fucking dark ok.

@mingi-ivity

Used lyric prompts from @taesblue . ‘’Can I trust you if I give you myself?’’ And ‘’Will you now forever remain out of reach of my arms?’’

-

It’s barely dawn when Seonghwa receives the letters, stacked up high and bound with a ribbon.  He recognises it as being from one of his shirts as a child, he and Hongjoong had play fought that day, and when it’d torn off he had insisted that he kept it, fabric still attached and fraying thanks to the expert seamstress. 

The collection of writings is passed to him by a masked man, an associate of Hongjoong apparently, he wouldn’t give his name but Seonghwa feels as if he’s seen him before once, when Hongjoong had brought him to a lovely garden as children, it was by a small house at the edge of the city. Hongjoong knew him supposedly, though the man was a teen at the time. Despite face now being covered. He’s almost positive it’s him. He’d told them his name back then, Seonghwa doesn’t remember what but it was something biblical. 

Seonghwa and the masked man don't exchange many words, the man simply confirming his relation to Hongjoong, saying that he had passed and had wanted these passed on to him.

It isn’t until the twilight of that day when Seonghwa finally has time to read the pile of letters, his royal duties taking up so much time of the day. And he can already feel his gut wrenching when he reads the note atop the pile.

If you’re reading these then something has happened and I have no use in keeping them. Maybe something has been revealed, I’ve gone missing or been killed, maybe I just finally needed to let things be known. Maybe my whole crew has been compromised. 

‘Seonghwa.

Throughout the years I've written many letters left unsent to you, sneaking me into your lessons has paid off after all. Had I been illiterate like most who are as unfortunate as me, you may have never kept in contact for so long. 

Please take the time to read my letters, I know most of it is inconsequential now, but I feel bad having never sent these.’

The handwriting is shaky, Seonghwa has seen Hongjoongs writing, as recently as just a few years ago, though it was rarely tidy, it was generally steady, he can’t help but worry for what state he must have been in while writing that.

He worries even more for what’s been left unsaid. Hongjoong had kept in touch with Seonghwa even after becoming a pirate and a fugitive, he was well liked in the city and seemed to make as many friends as enemies wherever he went, so he’d always found somebody to deliver the messages back to him.

It’s unfortunate they had to resort to letters, but after they’d both grown up a little more and were told the implications of their social statuses. They rarely had time to meet anymore. Seonghwa always gave his friend as much gold as he could when they met though, as a helping hand but also so Hongjoong could buy the stationary for writing his letters, which Seonghwa had encouraged he send.

The first letter is easily recognisable, Hongjoong had always signed his letters as a child with badly drawn stars, insisting they reminded him of Seonghwa.

They go pretty standard as far as letters go, nothing too surprising in the content of them, but Hongjoong had always been a perfectionist, and most of the letters compiled here are similar to ones he’s already received, likely first drafts. It’s cute that he kept these, the first draft is always less thought out than the edited final one, but for Hongjoong, who wears his heart on his sleeve, Seonghwa supposes these are rather embarrassing, none of his emotions held back as he scrawls whatever came to mind that he’d wanted to tell his friend. 

The letters begin to stray as he grows older though, Hongjoong must be in his late teens at the time of the first one.

‘Seonghwa!

Work today was so much more exciting than usual. I have a secret to keep! I obviously can’t send this to you because of that, but I’ve written to you so much that it’s easier to do that than write a diary entry.

You remember Wooyoung and Yeosang? They went on a date during our break today! But they told me I can’t tell anyone, Apparently boys aren't allowed to date eachother?

I think that’s unfair, They’re both so in love! I can’t imagine having to hide that from anyone! They’ve been together forever and can’t even say they love one another? It makes me sad, Imagine if you couldn't openly love anyone? What a depressing world that would be!

I don’t really have anything else to say, but I never knew boys could like boys! Can girls like girls too? Can you like both? I wonder if I’ll ever like a boy.

-Hongjoong’

Seonghwa chuckles at the letter, clearly it hadn’t been sent in case it had been lost and his friends were outed. Now he supposes Hongjoong sees no reason to hide the truth anymore.

The next letter is dated to a week after the event.

Apparently, there are no rules at sea, you can do and be whatever you want! That’s why there’s so many of them! San said he’d ask his friend about it next time he comes to town, so Wooyoung and Yeosang can love freely!

‘Seonghwa!

Today was awful, the boss caught Woo and Yeo holding hands and fired them! For holding hands! When we all met later for dinner together, San mentioned he knows a guy, a pirate!

That sounds so romantic and cheesy, leaving behind an uncaring world to sail the sea with you beloved. Sounds like the plot of a romance novel!

-Hongjoong’

I might go with them, apparently a life of piracy is the most free you can get, I’d like that. I think it’d be nice to not have to worry about everything I do here, about living, about working, about whether my friends will be okay.

I don’t know how I’d message you though, I doubt I can send letters from the sea!

Ah, so that’s what had spurred his life of piracy. He’d wanted freedom for himself and his friends. Seonghwa feels a little bad now, he’d berated Hongjoong for what he’d done when he first found out, calling him irresponsible for doing something like that.

Of course it was all in his head though, Hongjoong had already taken to the sea by the time he found out, and never stayed anywhere long enough for Seonghwa to send him a letter, he could only receive them.

The next letter is dated two days later.

He’s assured us we’ll be okay now though. Also! I learned that the pirate is the same guy we went to the garden with as kids! It almost seems like fate.

‘Seonghwa.

We had to leave in a hurry, I never knew that my friends love was illegal! They were going to be arrested and Sans pirate friend was at the docks so he let us board with him. We couldn’t prepare for this at all, I can only write this because I keep it my stationary in my bag at all times!

We’ll have to work here, a boat doesn’t take care of itself after all. Nor does a crew feed itself. But we’re assured we’ll be safe. He trusts we’d never do anything we aren’t supposed to so he and the older pirates said they’ll mentor us!

Gosh- I probably can’t send this, too much detail that others shouldn’t know. It happens a lot right? People try and intercept royal mail? I’ll need to rewrite this before I can send it to you. Make it less harmful for you if it gets out. Can’t have the public hating you for talking with a pirate now can we!

-Hongjoong’

That explains the rush then, why he was here one day and gone the next. Seonghwa wonders when Hongjoong had first been able to send his rewritten letter.

The letters continue for a while, mostly uneventful, they mostly consist of Hongjoong writing down his conflicting feelings regarding the position he’s found himself in. Seonghwa also learns the pirates name is Eden, he thinks that must be the man he saw today. Though why he is somehow still here when Hongjoong and his crew are, remains a mystery.

‘Seonghwa.

We were separated from Eden today, things went wrong and we ended up on opposite ends of the city we were in. We left as soon as we could. Eden said we should leave before him if anything like this is to happen. We have a rendezvous point. In case we’re separated. An island a long way North from here. Hopefully he’ll be okay.

I’ve been appointed leader now, it’s...weird. I never saw myself as being in a leadership position, he said I was most fit for it in his absence. I don’t see how, but I’ll have to live up to it now.

Is this how you feel, Seonghwa? Being in a position of power that you didn’t ask for? I can’t imagine royalty have much say in their succession to the throne.

You must have been crowned by now, It’s been years since I left. I wish I were able to say the real reason. I probably could by now, but I’ve kept it so long. I can’t even remember exactly what it was.

Our newest additions, Mingi and Jongho, have been a big help. They’re always a reliable shoulder to lean on in times like this. I might go visit them later, They’re good listeners. I don't know what lead them to this life, they’re both such kind people.

Though I suppose so were Wooyoung and Yeosang.

I don’t know if I’m ready for a leadership position, no matter how temporary. And if Eden doesn’t return...

I don’t want to think about that now. I’ll go above deck, maybe I can distract myself. Yunho is good at cards, maybe I’ll play with him for a bit.

I wonder if these diary-letters will ever see the light of day. If they do, I hope they’re only read by you Seonghwa.’

Hongjoong hadn't signed off the letter this time. Maybe he was so eager to distract himself that he forgot.

He relates to him, about the leadership thing. Seonghwa hadn’t at all wanted nor been prepared for taking on the throne. But he had to anyway after the passing of his parents, nobody else was eligible. The people will probably grow tired of him soon, he refuses to take a wife. And if he can't make an heir then he leaves nobody to ascend to the throne when he himself dies.

Good, it should be kept that way. Let him be the last one to be forced into this.

The next few letters are as expected, detailed accounts of what happened while they sailed to their destination. Mostly just Hongjoong getting used to leading everyone. Yeosang and Wooyoung were wed, apparently the captain is able to do that. It sounds like a lovely evening, even in Hongjoongs hungover description of it the following day. There’s a letter detailing their arrival to the island, and that strange things had been happening. It gets the most concerning about three days in though, as they tried to go inward to climb a small mountain there for the best vantage point.

‘Seonghwa.

We’re at the base of the mountain now. Everyone keeps joking that San should have no trouble climbing it. I can tell they’re on edge though.

We aren't alone here. I’m certain of it. We all feel as if someone is watching us. 

Things are out of place that shouldn’t be, or go missing, or we’ll think someone is there and then they’re not. There isn’t much in the way of living beings around us, so we can’t possibly chalk it all up to that.

I can't wait to get off this damn island. I don’t know what’s here and frankly I don’t want to. Whatever it is, as long as it doesn't follow us back onto the ship then we’ll be fine.

Hopefully we aren’t just all going paranoid.

I can find moments of peace in moments like tonight though. I’m up in a tree, impractical for writing, I know. But the leaves block out the sky.

I like watching the sky, the stars remind me of you. I wonder if you watch it too?

I don’t know what life I wanted, But now I’m sure this isn't it. I was so stupid as a child, if only I’d known about my feelings sooner.

I think I may be in love. With you.

This is so disjointed, maybe I’m going crazy after all.

It’s so stupid, I can never return now, I can’t leave my friends and by now we’re wanted in most places near our home, likely there too.

That’s what you get when you try to teach a bunch of kids to steal, we only didn’t get caught because we were so fast. We wanted freedom, and we were willing to run until our legs gave out beneath us to get it.

All I know now is this is not the life I want. It’s the one I've chosen, but it wasn’t a very thought out choice.

If I could fix things, I’d return to you, maybe confess my feelings. You were always so accepting weren't you? I’m sure even if they aren’t reciprocated, you’d never hate me for it. But I can’t return, not now. If could, Can I trust you if I give you myself? Would you hide me away from the world? So I could finally be with you?

Will you forever remain out of reach of my arms?

I would continue writing, but something is happening in the distance, it may be nothing, but I should wake everyone and check just in case. ‘

Yet again, it isn’t signed off. Seonghwa is worried, not even processing this letter before he moves onto the next one. It’s barely legible in words and writing.

‘ Seonghwa!!!

Its us its us itsus???

More us? They look like us

they arent us, we are us.

firefirefire so much fire

and smoke and mirrors

the sea? will I find them through the sea??

they came through mirrors??

where were the mirrors?

they have the answers

I should go

I need answers

they said they have them

what answers?

do I have questions?

bloodbloodblood

they were bleeding

are they real?

are they hurt?

theyre us are we hurt?

are we real?

I need answers

I have to go

through the mirror through the water through the sea

I need to go

will I come back?

maybe I can if I go

im sorry I cant give you all happiness

I wish I could give you freedom

if I get answers

I need answers

I need you

I need Seonghwa

I miss Seonghwa

I love Seonghwa

I want him iwanthimiwant

take me back take me back rewind it all

take me back to him

how?’

break the clock

bring me back

i want out

When Seonghwa finally reads the last letter, the writing is neat, but it isn’t Hongjoongs.

Seonghwa can’t bring himself to read the last letter, not after this.

Hongjoong loves him?

What does he mean by more of them?

Why is he only saying all of this now?

I don’t know what happened, Everyone is missing. I’ve searched all over the island and found nothing.

‘Seonghwa.

I’m sure you’ll recognise my name from Hongjoongs letters. I’m Eden.

I’m going to return to you and give you his letters, you deserve to have them. It’s the least I can do for the both of you.

I don’t know why I’m not being affected like they were.

I don’t know you, But Hongjoong talked about you often, I always wondered when he’d come to terms with his feelings, it seems that it was too late.

I can't give you anything to bury, but I found a piece of his shirt beside his letter, I don't know why it's bloodied, but you should have it more than I should.

I'll leave it in an envelope with the letters.

I’ll tie the stack with his ribbon, though I suppose it’s really yours. 

He never took it off in the entire time I met him.

I hope despite all of this, you can somehow carry on.

-Eden'

I won't stay long, I should return to the sea, I should warn people about the island.

I hope for your sake that our paths never have to cross again.

'Carry On'

Seonghwa doesn't know if he can. Doesn't know if he'll ever get over what he and Hongjoong could have been, ever get over the haunting words of his last letter, if he'll ever stop keeping that shredded piece of cloth in his pockets until it's nothing but threads.

Seonghwa doesn't know if he'll ever be able to carry on without Hongjoong.

He just wishes he knew where the island is. Wishes he could search for Hongjoong himself, he needs to see with his own eyes that he's not coming back.

Because he has to come back, there's so much they missed, so much they could have done, could have been.

He needs to know what happened, he needs to know what Hongjoong saw, what made him walk into the water to find answers, what took Hongjoong away from him. Seonghwa has been waiting all this time for Hongjoong to come back, for him to maybe change his appearance and return with a new name, to finally be able to see him again.

He needs his own answers now.

To talk with him, laugh with him, smile with him.

If he knew what he does now, to maybe even marry him.

Maybe he'll go down to the docks tomorrow, the sailors always love to chatter and gossip. if Eden is true to his word. Maybe Seonghwa can find that island, 

Find Hongjoong.

[neoatiny]

정 윤호 | Ateez Yunho (pirate!au) | Ateez Headcannon

“My compass is your whispering. Even if you go back a long time, please stay by my side.” -Ateez, Mist

The Sailing Master of the Horizon

The dude is LouD

I mean LouD as in you-can-never-not-hear-this-guy-talking kind of LouD

You can always hear him happily chatting with however is near him

He spends most of his time in the captain’s quarters helping Hongjoong build maps

When he does leave the quarters, everyone is happy to see him

He’s always cracking jokes

Would have been such a chaotic duo with Wooyoung if he just s t o p p e d stealing his things

He can’t find his parchment? Probably hidden in between the kitchen plates

He can’t find his telescope? Probably dangling over the bulwarks by a piece of rope tied to the railing

And when he can’t find his compass that’s he’s said countless of times before is irreplaceable? Probably wedged in between some broken planks on the deck

Isn’t really one to hold a grudge so Wooyoung never listens and continues to steal his things

Is the most wonderful artist the captain’s ever met

The whole crew has ever met let’s be honest

He can draw maps, buildings, caricatures

You name it, he can draw it

Takes requests when he’s off-duty and Mingi holds his drawing close to his heart (he won’t admit it no matter how many times Yunho teases him about it)

San and him get along well because “he actually understands the importance in learning the names of various plants”

Yunho is shut-lipped when he gets injured because he feels it’ll be a problem to others

When he got his first injury on the Horizon, it took weeks for his limp to heal and Seonghwa was the one to find him hiding in the storage room, messily rewrapping bandages he stole from the medbay around his leg

It was the first and last time he saw Yunho cry

Captain told everyone to keep an eye on him discreetly, but Yunho knows

He’s a smart guy, after all

Restlessly proves that he’s useful to the crew because he’s scared of being left behind

“Captain, if we continue to head in this direction, we’ll bump into an Honor Guard ship in four hours or so”

“Yes, Yunho. I know.”

“…Oh” :(

Was a very cheerful kid back in his hometown, Caligo

Loved to help the townspeople (carry milk bottles, carry out flyers, find missing cats, etc)

Everybody loved him, but it was also because his father was part of the town council so they needed to respect his son

Didn’t have a lot of friends even though he played a lot with the street kids

They always asked him for money saying that he “Had loads more at home, so why not give some of it to us?”

Yunho thought he was doing a good deed at the time, always following others to make them happy

Had loved exploration since he could remember

His father was an exploration enthusist himself so Yunho always played with his father’s telescopes and cartography kit

Made a really descriptive map of the town when he was 9, marking where everyone lived and worked

Drew them himself and was praised by his father for it, gifting him his silver compass that he used to travel with when he was younger

His mother was also proud, but slightly disturbed on his amount of research into the town

During the Nox War, general soldier recruitment happened and most of the men in town got drafted to fight

During those times, his father became more snappy and more unloving towards him

Whenever that happened, his mother would take him to the garden to comfort him

“Do you want to play a game, Yunho?”

immediately would stop crying and they’d make little maps of make-believe islands with his mini cartography kit

Yunho always won, of course

They’d post them on the garden’s walls and they would take care of the flowers

Yunho pretty much knows every single type of flower and their meaning

When he was 11 years old, his father went POOF and disappeared for over a month without any word

His father got replaced by someone else on the town counsel and that man did e v e r y t h i n g to badmouth his father

“He left without a word! Do you want someone who leaves the town while they’re in need?”

When his father eventually came back, he constantly ignored him, muttering about sea thieves

Yunho would later come to learn in one of his father’s dusty books that it was another term for pirates

His parents would fight in his father’s study and he’d cry while listening in through the door

“You can’t just come back without saying anything, Kyungho! Our neighbours are badmouthing us! Our son believes you don’t even love him anymore!”

“He isn’t important! He isn’t important right now, Yunha! The Honor Guard, Yunha. Somebody lied and said that we helped a band of pirates. They’re going to come for us and you want to worry about people judging you? You want to worry about him?”

He isn’t important. Those words would be a constant reminder as he grew up

He felt alone and it didn’t help that he no one in the town would talk to him anymore because of the new council member

Yunho has this scar on his right hand after someone threw literal glAss at him

“You and your family aren’t welcome! Your father abandoned us!”

The house seemed to grow emptier and emptier as days went by

One late night, his mother had brought him to the garden after he heard loud noises from downstairs

“Mo-Mother? What’s happening? Where’s father?”

“Let’s play a game, Yunho.”

And being the obedient son that he was he agreed

“I want you to stand very still, okay? Don’t move because…because then you won’t be able to see the surprise your father and I planned for you.”

He should have known something was up when he saw her mother not dressed in her nightgown

She disappeared and all that kept him company were the chirping crickets

"The stars looks so nice tonight.”

Some time passed and she still hasn’t come back

And she never did

His mother had abandoned him in the garden and tried to run away and officials found her in the outskirts of town by a dingy boat

On the same night, his father and mother were hanged in the gallows for aiding in piracy (false charges but nobody knew that)

He was taken away the next day, never seeing the garden ever again

Stayed in the town orphanage which obviously did not have enough space to accommodate all the kids inside

Spent sleepless nights wondering why she did what she did

maybe she did it since she knew he wouldn’t get hanged and maybe she did it for his safety and it wouldn’t have been the best for him, but it messed with him for y e a r s

Especially since the older boys in the orphanage would not let him forget

“If you were important, your mother wouldn’t have left you to rot in that stupid garden.“

He hated the town and he hated everyone so the moment he saw a flyer (‘Looking for a Navigator’) for a local merchant ship he was OUTTA THERE

Had only a small bag of money and his father’s compass around his neck before he left 

Spent only six months on the ship before they got raided by pirates (you know who)

The captain was absolutely fascinated by the maps

"Who drew these?”

“I did.”

Don’t blame Yunho for speaking up he was just afraid he was going to die if nobody spoke up so give him a break

“You’re an amazing artist.”

That was the day he joined the Horizon, the Pirate King’s ship

“Mingi! How would you feel about not having to navigate anymore?”

He had joined during the early years of the Horizon and it took the captain almost a year to actually learn anything personal about him (oof)

Said yes to the captain’s proposal since he was still a bit (very) terrified of him

Didn’t really believe the pirate life was for him, but he accepted it fully

He’s a very big reason why the Horizon is more merciful with the people they encounter on sea

He’s glad he met the captain and swears he’ll have his back no matter what

He finally had a family and he wasn’t just going to go and leave them like his did

:’)

————

Captain, take care of him, please-

Horizon Masterlist / Taglist

1 out of 8 headcannons finished

[neoyi]

I hope your okay with another ask! “:D I hope this is a simple enough ask; Any general headcannons for all the knights? (or at least your favorites?)

Simple ask indeed, but general enough for me to fill a textbook. Admittedly a lot of my headcanon is centered on either Propeller or Specter Knight because I’m not nearly as invested in the rest as I am those two. But still, what headcanons do I have? Okay, I’ll try and write one headcanon for each knight so I don’t go overboard.

1.) King Knight: ...is smarter and cleverer than he looks and acts, but has a problem of not applying himself because he’s so delusional and one-tracked in his goals. King Knight is very determined and we see in spite of a doting mother, he doesn’t lack independence. Look in his room and you can get an idea of what he does. He works out, he draws, and he’s handy with tools. He cares for his rats! They may be his subjects, but if his pets aren’t kept in good condition, then they’d be dead weight to him, so he knows how to properly care for his animals. It’s possible he likes animals; he shows more affection to spinwulves than he does anyone else. And of course, if you should choose, he can Joustus, a game that generally requires strategy. King Knight is kind of like that guy who has a degree in like engineering or something/ It he could just utilize it properly, he could get him a very good job, and a cushy life, but he rampantly chooses not to because he’s that much of a BONEHEAD. He’s dumb in a different way and it’s holding him back.

2.) Plague Knight: ....and Mona does not want children. They knew right off the bat and decided then and there once they were officially dating. They aren’t the type of people to be parents and kids are...well, little things running around ruining science experiments and throwing shit around. Besides, Plague and Mona already throw shit around, why should those little bastards have all the fun?

The closest the two come to having “kids” is creating imperfect clones of themselves as they get older. Most of them were merely tasked to finish what they themselves started and keep mad science alive. As centuries pass, the clones would keep creating more clones to continue their work. Each clones were a little less perfect than the other, and in time, they’ve more or less reduced to Blorbs. Specter Knight, still around centuries later, occasionally would check on them (if not at first to keep them away from the public since they carried Plague and Mona’s chaotic desire to raise Hell), but soon decided they were now harmless enough to be left alone to their own device.

3.) Treasure Knight... and Propeller Knight are rivals and they both haaaaaaaaaate the other’s occupations in the pettiest of ways. They’re pirates, so they automatically have a rapport, but Treasure Knight finds it insulting that Sky Pirates are A Thing. Pirates belong in the SEA. They fight giant squids and bury treasures deep in the heart of lost lagoons and islands. SKY Pirates? What the heck is even a SKY pirate? What does a SKY Pirate even do? Where’s the big ocean with all the Mystery and Scary Ass Sea Creatures? They fly with birds???? There’s Mountains?????????? They don’t even have GIANT squids, just medium-sized Sky Squids. And Floating Islands? That’s just cheating.

Every single one of their meeting inevitability end with the two having a pirate match to secure the most gold or engage in a duel. Sometimes Treasure would win some, other times Propeller would. They would keep this fierce competition  until they died.

But

That doesn’t mean neither one disrespected each other. From Treasure’s personal perspective, Propeller Knight is many things - frivolous, fancy, and shallow - but he is still a PIRATE. Sky Pirates are Dumb, but they’re still PIRATES. Propeller Knight goes by his own code that Treasure personally doesn’t get, but he respects the hell out of him because Propeller sticks by it and uses his piracy to achieve his goals. When push comes to shove, they can, have, and will shake hands through mutual kinship.

There is one thing both Treasure and Propeller can 100% agree on though: Subterranean Pirates are the WORST. Why is that even a THING?!

4.) Mole Knight: ...is not just digging in the Lost City because he “claimed it” as his own nor because it’s a good place to practice his superb digging skills, Mole legitimately and genuinely is curious about the history behind it. He’s an archeologist; a man thirsty for knowledge. He knows a lot about history in general, but his expertise lies in the Lost City.

Post-Shovel of Hope, he learns to share his findings with others. His obsessive need to keep the ruins for himself dissipates over time and he learns the value of teamwork. There are others like him who shares his love for knowledge and past civilizations; Mole is incredulous to know there are other working theories he never considered! In the end, it is not his pride that mattered most to him, but his passion to uncover and preserve this beautiful, ancient world. After all, he has ancestral ties to the Lost City and the best way to keep that alive is by sharing his knowledge with others.

6.) Tinker Knight: ...once invited his friend Propeller Knight over to show him something he invented. It would be handy because he needed a way to record his many inventions. He shows off a projectile that displays a moving image on a screen. He calls it...”Moving Pictures!” Propeller is amazed; this could, indeed, store information in ways the written word cannot.

Propeller asks him after, “Tinker, my good friend, have you considered using this Moving Picture for purposes other than recording?”

Tinker is puzzled, “What more could I use it for?”

Propeller chuckled, “Perhaps you can devise a story out of it. Like a stage play, only using these, er, what did you call them? “Celluloid”, to capture a story. We could have words written on the screen after a person speaks since it’s silent.”Tinker is flabbergasted. No, he only intended it to be used to archive his inventions and ideas. Why would anyone want to make a story through his Moving Pictures?Propeller, not listening (of course) sighs, “And you cannot call it Moving Picture, it’s too mouthful. Come on, Tinker, you who speak so pragmatically, would know to shorten it. Perhaps we can call it “Movers.” Or “Mov ‘ems.” Oh! I know, “movies.”

“That is a bad idea. I do not like it at all.” Tinker scoffed.

“Well, it was worth a shot, “Propeller shrugged, “How goes that rocket blueprint of yours? When will my dreams come true; that I shall one day reach the Moon?”

7.) Polar Knight: ...My headcanon is that he is too secretive to have a past that could be told... Also I haven’t really thought too much about this guy. Get back to me when I play his story mode in Showdown.

I do personally believe he is NOT related to Shield Knight though. He likely knew her, but only through proxy from Shovel and Black Knight.

8.) Propeller Knight: ...has always had a beautiful face. He takes great care to ensure it looks nothing less than perfect. But living a life as a pirate comes with drawbacks. One day, during a time of great grievance in his life, Propeller Knight comes face-to-face with a foe most personal. The battle is horribly one-sided for Propeller was at his lowest. He lost concentration and with it, an eye.

The first few days wearing that unsightly eye patch was too much to bare. He had to readjust to his newfound vision for one, but his face - no longer perfect. He questions so many things in his life; he’s made so many sacrifices, so many enemies, and lost a few good people in his life under various circumstances. Him losing an eye seemed paltry in comparison, but it symbolized the decisions he’s made and he has to live with it. Who is he? A Pirate? A Prince? Neither or Both? Does he fight against the corrupted nature of the Rich and Powerful even though he once lived among them?

He can’t answer them now. All he can do is slowly let the scars heal. He will not take for granted the friends, family, and love he has in his current life. They will be his rock and he will carry them to the winds. Propeller puts on his eye patch and stands up. He can still look at the setting sun.

9.) Shovel Knight: ...I don’t think he’s a fish person. But I’m boring and think all the knights are human.

10.) Shield Knight: ....spent some time suffering nightmares. She would wake up and remember that she hasn’t been trapped for a while. The Enchantress is a distant memory, but the events are still recent that she still endures these horrid flashbacks. Shield Knight imagines she’ll never really get over them, but her determination is strong and she knows little by little, the nightmares are becoming less and less of a occurrence.

Recently, she’s been taken to gardening. Shovel introduced it to her. They don’t really have a home since the two are always on the go, but that little farm house Shovel vanished off to years back still remain. So they often return and plant new crops. Shield found it patronizing and difficult at first, unsure what Shovel saw in it and how it could help her. Now she finds it therapeutic.

Nowadays she can go alone and pick out fresh carrots and potatoes without Shovel at her beck and call (so she lets him sleep in a bit.) It feels good. It feels peaceful. She could get used to this.

11.) Black Knight: ....I imagine he’d be the type to sacrifice himself so Shovel and Shield can be happy. Maybe one day he does exactly that. It also meant saving the world as well. Black Knight regrets a lot of things, but this he does not...

12.) Specter Knight: ...”You will not remember me centuries from now,” He proclaimed one day. For one who was always sure of their relationship, this was a particularly alarming moment of vulnerability from Propeller.

“What?” Specter Knight tilted his head in confusion.

“You once told me you shall always carry me in your heart; that way you will remember me long after I’ve passed on,” Propeller elaborated, “But be real. Undead immortal or not, you cannot think to remember who I am thousands of years from now. It will be so long and you will have done so much by then.”

“Propeller...” Specter was incredulous and frankly, kind of hurt. Why would Propeller assume this of him?

“It is alright, you are not obligated to do so. I want you very much to live a wonderful life long after I am gone,” Propeller smiles, “Make friends, have adventures, help people....fall in love again. It is alright if you forget me because you will have a life fulfilled.”

Specter is silent and for a while, it seemed believable what Propeller said would be true. He lowered his head, then remembered he was sick of it, sick of feeling sad when it took years to learn how to be happy. He stared intensely at Propeller and sternly told him, “No.”“ Excusez-Moi?”

“I will help people, I will make friends, I’ll go on grand adventures, and yes, maybe I will fall for another centuries down the line, but you are a damn fool if you think I will forget you,” Specter clutched his chest, “Thousands of years from now, if I am still wandering this strange planet, I will still remember you.”

Propeller looks at his lover, stunned. He is touched. This is the kind of grand romantic gesture he lives for, but he tears up not out of joy, but somberness, “...I appreciate the thought, Donovan, but it’s alright if you cannot keep this promise. I’m just saying.” Specter sighs and wraps an arm around his husband.

                                                          ~*~

Ten thousand years, the sun is red and the planet drying. Very little life exists, and Death walks collecting the last remaining souls. He eyes the massive star, forever looking like a malicious red sunset (he loved the sunset...) Soon, it would go supernova and perhaps, perhaps he can finally rest for good. Then he can be with his loved ones.

Wind is rare nowadays, but whenever he feels a breeze his way, Death knows who is watching him.

He has not forgotten him...

[weekendwarriorblog]

30 Minute Experiment: Work #30ME

So I’ve already gone through a couple Pink Floyd titles and one from The Cult, so I might as well start working my way through The Godfathers’ Birth School Work Death in terms of topics for this 30 Minute Experiment. (For anyone just joining, the idea is that I pick a topic and write about it for 30 minutes straight, without interruptions. When the time is up, I post. No edits, no re-reads, probably many regrets.)  Okay, let’s do this...

It will surprise absolutely no one that I’m a bit of a workaholic and I’ve been one for most of my life. I think my first job must have been when I was 14 or 15 or so when I got a bicycle and started delivering newspaper, a job that I quite liked because it was a quiet suburban neighborhood in Westport where not a lot happened. (I do remember one day being flashed by an older woman who came to the door wearing absolutely nothing not realizing I was on the other side leaving her newspaper.)

One of the weird things going on in this pandemic is that after losing a writing gig I had just started, it gets harder and harder to push myself to do the much-needed work I have to do, whether it’s doing these #30Mes or writing my weekly Weekend Warrior column or cleaning or working on some of my long dormant screenplays or even writing to my imprisoned penpal (who I just got a letter from so I need to get back to him fairly soon.)

At a certain point, everything seems like work, even if it’s just scheduling time to hang out on Zoom with friends or family, which is something I did far less of in the days pre-pandemic (Can we maybe start a new numbering system so that 2020 is Year One and every year that follows would be 1 Post-Pandemic for 2021, etc? It feels suitable.)

But this whole time and even over the past four years I’ve been spending a lot of time trying to find some form of steady work, and sadly, things were so unstable pre-pandemic that it’s only gotten harder as more of my movie-writing colleagues are losing jobs and there are far more opportunities. I mean, anyone who reads my Weekend Warrior every week (or EVER!) will know that there are still movies being released, even if not all of them are getting any kind of theatrical release. Some of them are even quite good. 

I was talking to one of my colleagues last night about the work situation and how everything just came to a stop in March when most of us had things planned or in the works, which unfortunately revolved mostly around movies. 

But the current situation has become a great equalizer in terms of people needing to cover a lot more smaller indie movies, TV series and streaming stuff if they want to keep their jobs. I’m pretty sure that the job market is going to look very different in a few months as the country starts slowly reopening, and I think the people who don’t want to do the actual work like going to see movies and having varied tastes, won’t survive. They’ll just give up and go take one of those regular 9 to 5 desk jobs that are out there.

Believe me, I’ve been ready to make that transition for a couple years as I lost a lot of freelance outlets, some being closed, others just going in a different direction. It’s tough out there, and it’s really hard for me to take any sort of dog-eat-dog mentality when it comes to work, because I don’t like seeing my friends struggling. That hurts me almost as much as my own struggle (which I’m happy to say has taken an interesting and slightly positive turn this week).

Sure, I’m definitely ready to be done with this and to get back to work, even though it’s been some time since I’ve had any steady work hours -- probably the Tracking Board where I was doing a 9 to 5 shift five days a week -- and I’m going to have to get back into some of the good working habits. I already try to go to sleep at a reasonable hour and don’t stay up past midnight playing video games (or Android games) or doing some of the other distractions that would keep anyone else from getting work done.

I mean, if you read today’s Weekend Warrior, you’ll see that I spent a lot of time watching and writing about a bunch of movies just so that people will have some idea that there is good movie entertainment still coming their way which hopefully they’ll look into it. I don’t want to too far down the tangential wormhole of the movie biz right -- I’ll have plenty of time to talk about that over the next few months -- but the pandemic equalizer that I mentioned hasn’t really helped the smaller indie movies as I’d hoped since people still would rather throw on Netflix or Hulu or HBO and binge watch some show or another. 

I have a LOT of stuff that I’ve been meaning to watch but my desire to keep my brain in gear and stay motivated in terms of my writing has led to things like this experiment, which I’ve done a pretty good job keeping up with. If I really look at this to see how it helps me in terms of earning a living, I think I can say fairly that it’s a daily job that forces me to think and write quickly, which is something that’s important for most of the better writing jobs out there. And it only takes 30 minutes a day, so it’s not like it’s taking me away from any of the time-wasting activities I’d love to do instead.

Sure, I’m definitely trying to use this time productively even if the “work” I’m doing doesn’t do much to help me financially, although I will say that doing this stuff helps me both mentally and emotionally, which is half the battle when you’re dealing with a job and people you have to work with. I learned that the hard way at a few of my recent jobs post-CS, but I’m not going to get into all of that. I believe very strongly that sometimes you just have to do something to maintain your own mental health even when it’s not the best decision on the grand scheme of things.

I do miss having some of the structure of a job in my life even though I feel my calendar is just filling up with other things, even if it’s just doing things to help support my friend’s own mental and emotional health by taking part in their activities. Believe me, as much as the monotony of the day-to-day may have been getting to me a few weeks back, I feel like I’ve moved past that, and now I’m so focused and disciplined about getting things done, who knows? Maybe I’ll even have a few screenplays done by the time I’m allowed to go to a movie theater or press screening again.

I can only imagine how much harder this is for my friends and family who have gotten used to going to an office five days a week and have built their entire lives around that structure. Of my immediate family, only my sister and her husband and kids were doing anything in that vein, since both my brother and I have always been homebodies for the most part.

Right now, I’m not sure if I could even deal with going on the subway every day to go to a job, but thankfully, more businesses are figuring out how to stay running while allowing employees to work from home. At least as a writer, I don’t necessarily have to be anywhere, although as I’ve said before, I still prefer to see movies on the big screen... preferably without my own name watermarked across it. (This is done to avoid piracy, obviously, since it can be traced right back to me.)

Although I’m slowly inching towards a point in life where most people are ready to retire, I think I’ll be good to keep working in some capacity or other for at least the next ten years. The down time in between jobs these past few years has made it far easier for me to be thrifty so it’s no like I’m trying to support a ridiculous comic book habit anymore and have less need for consumerism. 

I can’t remember if I discussed during the “money” topic but I do feel better when i know i have money just in case I want to do something fun when that’s allowed again. There have been too many times in recent years where I’ve had to decline an invite to go somewhere just because I was worried about how even spending $20 might affect my ability to eat for that week. (Yes, things got that bad!)

I guess we’ll see where things go in the next few months, but I don’t think you’ll meet another person who is more than ready to go to work for 40 to 60 hours a week once again, since I’ve also gotten better at scheduling my time. I mean, it’s still not great but when it comes to working, especially as a writer, I feel that I’m always getting better at facing new challenges, and I do hope some will still come my way.

I have about five minutes left to go in today’s #30ME, and I’m not sure if I have that much more to say about “work” right at this moment, but I do want to say that if you got far into today’s ramble, I hope you’ll drop me a line with some suggestions and opinions. It doesn’t mean I will change what I’m doing since as I’ve said, these are more for me than anyone else, but it would be nice if someone is reading them and maybe it changes their opinion of me (hopefully in a favorable way). 

That’s it for me today but I’ll be back tomorrow..maybe talking about the “Birth” or “Death” part of that Godfathers song. 

[lightsaroundyourvanity]

the sparks between us, pg-13 [1/8]

RWBY. yang x blake. [ao3]

“Ah, finally. Time to kick up our heels and relax.”

Even Yang knows how out of place she must look when she flops backwards onto the powdered blue satin chaise, shamelessly props up one dusty boot. She doesn’t care. It’s comfortable (well, it’s horizontal) and Yang is bone tired. She folds her hands behind her head and leans back.

It’s been twelve hours since they’d arrived in Atlas. Twelve hours of security checks, protocol checks, weapons checks… and Yang had been ready to check out since before they’d even landed. Between sky piracy, losing her motorcycle, mortal combat, and battling skyscraper sized Grimm from the depths of the ocean, she had had a day.

Yang briefly lets her eyes shut in sweet, sleep-adjacent relief, and then blinks them open. She’s not the only one who looks tired. Ruby sags on her feet, and instinctively Yang wants to jump up again, put her to bed. Weiss looks even more high strung than usual, her arms crossed tightly over her chest. And Blake…

Blake has been wearing that same odd expression since they’d disembarked the airship. It’s complicated by shades of sadness, relief, exhaustion… and peace. Yang can’t imagine what Blake is thinking. They’d killed Adam together, but Yang had seen only the man who had tried to take her apart, piece by piece. She wonders what Blake had seen. All the directions he could have gone, all the moments he might have. He chose wrong every time. Yang won’t miss him.

Yang watches Blake for long enough that Blake notices, and their eyes meet. Yang tilts her chin towards Blake, and Blake bites her lip, smiles, and crosses over to join Yang on the chaise. She drapes Yang’s legs over her lap, and Yang sits up on her elbows.

This dynamic between them, this charged-and-not charged, is a new level for them both. Yang doesn’t know what to make of it, but she feels like a kid with a crush at a sleepover. All of the nerves on the backs of her legs feel more alive right now, and when Blake rests her hand on Yang’s kneecap, she thinks that she might explode.

They’ve always been affectionate. They’ve always been close. But there’s something more to it now. A promise. And if Yang thinks that she knows what it all means, she still doesn’t know how to say it aloud, not yet.

Yang’s reverie is shattered when Weiss lets out a disgusted noise. “You’re getting mud on everything.”

Yang looks at her boots (they’re filthy), and then up at Weiss. She raises an eyebrow. Like: After all this, you’re really going to play the princess card?

Weiss looks at the ground. “Well, you are,” she mutters.

Yang’s heart softens. Sometimes, being a brat is the only way that Weiss knows how to be vulnerable and scared. Yang lashes out with her fists instead of her tongue, but she gets that. And she thinks about how very vulnerable, and very scared Weiss must be feeling right now, back in the place she’d clawed her way out of.  

So Yang swings her legs down and sits up straight, and feels a mournful pull away from Blake when she does – except there Blake is again, resting her head against Yang’s shoulder, and Yang’s blood starts to sing. Weiss rolls her eyes, but she’s smiling.

Yang looks to Ruby again, uncharacteristically quiet. She frowns. “Doing okay, sis?”

Ruby smiles, but even that reveals how tired she must be. It’s like every ounce of chipper has been drained out of her, which Yang didn’t know was possible.

“I’m fine,” says Ruby. “Just…”

“Tired,” Weiss finishes. “I think we all are. What was General Ironwood thinking, making us go through all that bureaucracy? After everything we’ve been through?”

“Atlas is on high alert,” Blake says thoughtfully. “Makes you wonder what for.”

A hush falls over the four of them. Yang knows that they’re all remembering the armada that flanked the continent when they flew in, and maybe, distant and behind that, the last time they’d seen an Atlesien fleet surrounding a kingdom. Vale. Yang feels a phantom tug of pain from her arm.

“Whatever it is, we’ll get to the bottom of it,” Ruby says. A touch of her old strength returns to her voice. “We’ve faced worse. We have the relic. We have our mission. And if anyone in Atlas thinks they can stop us, well—”

Ruby’s speech is cut off mid-sentence when she breaks into an enormous yawn. Everyone giggles. Yang jumps to her feet and puts her arm around her sister.

“Okay, hero, time for bed.”

Ruby sleepily protests, but Yang ignores her and steers her towards a bedroom.

The apartment General Ironwood had given then was a little dainty and pastel for Yang’s tastes, but it was easy to navigate. The first door she opens is a bedroom, and she ushers Ruby into the overstuffed four poster.

“Yang?” Ruby asks, as Yang tucks her in.

“Yeah, Ruby?”

There’s no response. Ruby is fast asleep. Yang smiles and brushes a piece of hair from Ruby’s face. Her baby sister, saving the world. Like this, she still looks eight years old to Yang, but Yang has seen her lead battles with confident efficiency, seen her turn Grimm into stone with her eyes. And Yang is so, so proud of Ruby. She’s growing up into one of the heroes she’d always admired.

When Yang returns to the living room, Weiss is sorting through luggage, picking out her own. Blake is still on the chaise, and Yang reclaims the seat next to her.

“I’m going to bed too,” Weiss announces. “That was—”

“A day,” says Yang.

Weiss smiles. “It really was, wasn’t it? Night, you two.”

Weiss trips out, carrying her suitcase, and Yang glances at Blake. It’s just the two of them now. She wonders if they should talk. Or if she should put her hand on Blake’s knee and see where the wind sways from there.

“Are you tired?” Blake asks suddenly.

“What? No!” Yang is beyond tired, and she proves it a moment later by badly smothering a yawn. “Okay, maybe a little bit,” she admits sheepishly. “But not if you want to hang out.”

“I do want to,” says Blake. And then it’s like she’s read Yang’s mind, because she puts her hand. Right on Yang’s knee.

Yang turns to Blake, and a thousand words could bubble to her lips, but none of them seem to want to come out. She’s better with her hands. She lifts one now, rests it on the curve of Blake’s cheek. “Blake…”

Blake leans into her touch, and Yang is amazed all over again that they’ve eased into this point. At the intersection of new and familiar it all holds. She wonders what it would be like to kiss Blake. She bets her lips are soft.

“Tomorrow…” Blake murmurs.

“Huh?” Yang is still thinking about Blake’s lips.

“We’ll hang out tomorrow. We need to, um. Talk.”

Yang doesn’t know what they could possibly have to talk about that they can’t show each other.  And Yang knows that they have everything to talk about.

“Qrow said we could be here days before anyone will see us,” says Yang. “We’ll have plenty of time to…”

“Talk.”

“Yeah. That.” Yang’s thumb skates over Blake’s cheekbone, and she sees Blake’s lips part. I should kiss her now, Yang thinks. She wills herself to lean forward, to bring their mouths together. Except that…

Except that Blake has been through so much, and that it’s three in the morning, and that even if Blake does want to kiss her too (Yang thinks she wants to kiss her too), she might not appreciate it under the circumstances. She did just say they’d talk tomorrow.

So Yang takes her hand from Blake’s cheek, and her eyes from Blake’s lips, and pulls her into a hug, because that’s safer. Blake seems surprised for a beat, but then she buries her face in Yang’s shoulder and holds her back. Yang feels longing well up inside her.

“Good night,” she says into Blake’s hair.

Yang is exhausted when she goes to bed, but she lies awake for twenty minutes anyway, thinking about dumb, sappy things, like what it feels like to hold Blake’s hand.

--

Sharp knocking at the door wakes Yang the next morning, and she rolls over and puts a pillow over her head. She can still hear the knocking. Yang wonders if this is her responsibility somehow until she hears quick, precise footsteps in the other room and thinks, Oh good. Weiss.

Yang hears the sound of the door opening and muffled (but enthusiastic) greetings. She realizes that she is awake now anyway, so she throws the pillow aside, gets out of bed, and goes to investigate.

Weiss stands in the foyer talking to a taller, more remote version of herself. That must be her sister, Yang realizes. Winter.

“I’m so happy you were able to come over,” Weiss is saying. “It’s so good to see you! I was worried you might be busy—”

“Weiss. Are you going to let me in?”

“Oh! Of course!” Weiss steps aside, and gestures for Winter to come in, shuts the door, takes Winter’s coat. “Have a seat! Would you like coffee?”

“I’m fine.” Despite her clipped tone, there’s warmth in the way Winter treats Weiss. She crosses through and takes a seat on the blue chaise.

Yang clears her throat. “Hey.”

Weiss (fully dressed, nervously fluttering Weiss) takes one glance at Yang and looks mortified. “Yang,” she hisses. “Did you just roll out of bed?"

“Um. Kind of.” Yang tries to smooth out her hair, but it’s a tangled mass. “I’ll go get dressed.”

“No, stay,” says Winter. She looks at Weiss. “I’ve actually come to talk to your whole team.”

“I’ll get the others,” Weiss says. She’s gone in an eager flash.

Yang sprawls in an armchair, and soon the whole team is gathered, looking sleep rumpled and curious. Weiss returns with a tray of coffees, and Yang takes hers with both hands and is grateful for the first scalding, life-affirming swallow.

Blake sits on the floor next to Yang and sips a cup of tea. Yang can’t believe how good Blake looks after waking up. She can’t believe she never noticed it before – they’d shared a room for over a year, hadn’t they? But again, there’s that crackling new awareness. Yang wants to throw Blake over her shoulder and take her back to bed and stay there, warm and curled up against each other, until at least early afternoon.

Instead, she cocks her head attentively when Weiss speaks.

“What did you want to talk to us about, Winter?”

Winter sighs and puts down her cup. “It’s a little bit awkward.”

“Is it General Ironwood?” asks Ruby. “Is he ready to see us already?”

“Well, that’s just it. He’s not going to be able to see you. Not for a few weeks.”

Yang nearly chokes on her coffee. “Weeks? We don’t have weeks!”

Winter is nonplussed. “Unfortunately, all you have are weeks. There’s… a lot going on in Atlas that I can’t share right now.”

“So what are we supposed to do? Just sit around here until Ironwood deigns to talk to us or we get attacked?”

Yang feels her temper rise. It’s all frustration, fizzy and insubstantial, but she wants to throw it at somebody anyway.

Winter makes a terrible target. She remains cool; frank and apologetic. “That’s the other reason I came. If you’re interested, I have a job for you.”

“We’re interested,” says Ruby. She doesn’t look around the room first. She doesn’t have to. If the choice is between sitting on their hands or doing something useful? It’s no question at all.

Winter sizes up Ruby thoughtfully. After a beat, she nods. “Good. I was hoping you’d say that.” She takes a breath. “As I was saying, there’s a lot going on in Atlas right now. We’ve had to recall everyone on active duty because of—well, actually, that’s—”

“Classified,” Yang interrupts. “Yeah. We get it.”

“Of course.” Winter looks very much like she is trying not to roll her eyes. “Well, because of that, petitions from outside the kingdom have been going unheard. Villages who are facing threats from the Grimm. Most of the huntsmen in Atlas have obligations to the military, but I was thinking, well, if I could send a team who weren’t from Atlas…”

“Winter,” Weiss gasps, “Are you asking us to break the rules?”

“It’s more of a loophole than anything…”

“I love it!” Weiss starts to throw her arms around Winter, thinks better of it, and then pins them to her side. “Intrigue is an excellent source of sisterly bonding.”

“You know I can’t go with you. I’m needed here.”

Weiss’s face falls. “Of course.”

“Where do you want us to go?” asks Ruby.

“A village in the north called Neiden. There have been reports of increased Grimm activity.”

“Not for long!” If Ruby had her scythe on her, Yang thinks that she might have whipped it out, just for the dramatic effect.

“Why?”

Everyone turns to look at Blake, who is looking at Winter, confused. Suspicious, even.

“You care about the army. You care about these rules. There must be dozens of these unanswered distress calls. Why bend the rules for this one?”

It’s so like Blake, to cut right to the heart of the thing, to want to know the heart of the thing. Admiration socks Yang in the chest.

Winter fidgets. “You’re right, of course.” Winter pauses, sighs, and then continues stiffly. “It’s like you said. We have dozens of these distress calls. All unanswered. The Atlesien army is the mightiest in all of Remnant, and they can’t even protect Atlas. Desperate times. I wish I could say more, but—"

“Classified.” Yang hears Blake and Ruby join in the chorus with her and grins.

Colour rises in Winter’s pale cheeks. “I believe in Atlas, but I worry that Atlas is spread too thin. And it’s forgetting the world outside the kingdom. If we could help even one town… I had a friend at the academy from Neiden. I picked the case at random, but maybe that’s why it stood out.”

Yang’s eyes slide towards Blake again. Blake’s features have softened. Yang tries to guess at what thoughts are turning behind them. A stand against a rising tide is something that all of them can understand, but for Blake, that understanding is more personal.

“We help where we can,” Blake says softly. She and Winter share a look. Winter nods.

“When do we start?” Ruby asks.

“Tomorrow,” Winter says briskly. “I can get you there, and keep you supplied, but that’s all the help I can offer. This isn’t a sanctioned mission.”

Yang pumps her fist. “Black ops! Respect.”

Blake still looks concerned. “We’re still only students,” she says. “What makes you think we can do this?”

Winter smiles. “Because Weiss thinks you can. And I believe in her.”

--

Weiss walks Winter out, and Ruby goes to take a shower. Yang reaches her hand down just as Blake lifts hers. Their fingers tangle together, and Yang squeezes Blake’s hand.

“No rest for the wicked, huh?” says Yang.

“This feels like something to keep us from causing trouble while we wait for all of the adults to stop talking.”

Yang shrugs. “Maybe it is. That doesn’t mean we won’t be able to help people."

“True.” Blake looks thoughtful for a moment. “I liked her. Winter. Even if this is just busy work, it seems like she really… cares.”

“She reminded me of Weiss that way.”

“Me, too.”

Yang tugs Blake’s hand towards her, and Blake follows automatically. She gets off the ground and curls up with Yang on her chair, legs dangling over one arm. Yang still holds her hand, and she runs her thumb over the lines of Blake’s palm.

This is more than friendship. Sitting in each other’s laps, feeling each other’s skin – Yang is pretty sure that this all goes beyond friendship. This grey area they’ve found themselves in intoxicating. And fragile. And Yang’s still not sure that she should be the one to ask for more. She’s happy to have this, even if her thoughts are straying towards Blake’s mouth again.

Maybe this mission will be a good thing. It’ll give Yang the chance to blow off a little steam. Yang thinks she could even look forward to it: A straightforward hunt without the world hanging in the balance. No gods, no monsters, no ghosts.

“Hey, if we’re going further north, you know what we need to do?”

“Hm?” Blake sounds half tuned out, but her ears prick forward.

“Buy you a new coat.” Yang pauses thoughtfully. “And maybe a sword.”

Yang’s day starts planning itself in her head, as easily as falling dominoes. Shopping with Blake. Trying on clothes with Blake. Running her hands over weapons components and talking about designs with Blake…

Yeah. A straightforward hunt was just what Yang needed.