#pr hags

[zot3-flopped]

The people who see PR in celebs’ love lives got to this point because they hold certain very childish beliefs about relationships and about what pop stars feel about their fans, and also about paparazzi.

So first of all they have an incredibly simplistic view of relationships, which is that a couple should be visibly a couple or else it there is something wrong. Imagine a young teenage girl writing to an agony aunt: ‘My boyfriend won’t hold my hand in public: doesn’t he truly love me?” only there is no agony aunt to tell them to get a grip and that people use different levels of affection at different times - you know, normal stuff that people usually learn really young but these chumps have somehow not. This is where all the ‘he never claims his women’ crap comes from. I suspect they are growing up in really conservative, perhaps very Christian, families where landing a good husband means you have won a prize in life. They need to perform the role of girlfriend as a warning to others to back off, and they need their boyfriends to perform their roles as protection.

Secondly, since they are stunted emotionally, they believe that “the fans” actually have some real measure of control over what pop stars do - in 1D’s case, they fully encouraged this. All the praise of the fans, all the effusive thank yous, all the acknowledgement that the fans know everything - this is what some simple-minded fans cling onto, not the other stuff about boundaries and personal lives etc. It means that they think on some level (of insanity) that the fans and the pop star are working towards the same goal, namely a sort of shared friendship where the fans can advise the star, and he will do what they say. So when the pop star doesn’t share stuff, doesn’t let them IN, they feel a psychological wound, and go on the attack. Sometimes the man gets it; always the woman gets it. (Women are a natural threat: see above.) This is where management fill a role, too: they take the pressure off the need to blame the star himself for rejecting the fans’ clear wishes. Double points if management can be in cahoots with the woman.

Thirdly, they hold intractable beliefs about how the paparazzi industry works, and they cannot be shaken from these. It’s useless to explain that paps have gone on record saying that stars at the very top don’t tend to call them unless they have a very, very specific job that needs doing (I saw a good example of Rihanna announcing her first pregnancy, bump out, head-to-toe Chanel). What paps say is that people calling them for promo are usually at the low end of the fame spectrum, and they have a brand endorsement to do. But because some people call them sometimes, in their simple minds that means all celebs call them always, and every shot that ever appears now is called a pap walk. Half the time they’re just fans with iPhones. It doesn’t help that Backgrid have a couple of times accepted these photos onto their database, from where they’re purchased and published. The ‘low-rent celebs doing a brand endorsement’ might explain why some people are convinced he is actively promoting Lime Bikes. He’s worth £175M but yeah he’s a public bike influencer as well (rolling my eyes).

Here are some truths about Harry: he hates being photographed - according to paparazzi! -so when he looks miserable, it’s not because he’s being forced to be with a particular woman against his will. He doesn’t talk about his relationships and I have absolutely no doubt that every person he’s been with has for a long while been on the same page. He knows how to do PR and he always works hard at promotion so it doesn’t take a genius to work out that if (in an alternate universe, presumably) he ever did do a PR relationship (as if) he would do a good job at it and not scowl at the cameras in sweaty gym gear. He is rarely photographed by fans with Taylor, and currently is rarely photographed by himself as well, so either he’s setting boundaries (good) or he’s not going out as much (not good).

Harry and Taylor being spotted in a bakery or whatever is not going to sell theatre tickets in NY but that’s what those childish nitwits are angling for. It’s pathetic.

It’s cathartic to let all this out but I understand if you prefer not to publish my essay. Thank you.

👏👏👏 So many excellent, perceptive points. You are right about these PR types being childish and inexperienced. There was a poll on @apolladay with about 1k votes and 60% of Tumblr bloggers have never been in a relationship.

Here's a more recent poll with over 1k votes. 54% still live at home with their parents.

https://www.tumblr.com/apolladay/741515281930780672/who-do-you-live-with-alone-with-parent-or?source=share

[niamflopped]

'They looking in pr blogs to know what to do.'

The enormous collective ego these trolls have!

[thegreatyin]

on one hand greylu is so friendly post character development that i don't know how anyone could know him for five minutes and still think he's a pure evil shadow monster. but on the other hand he is still a living tar creature who's preferred form around strangers is either dressing up as the most regal skeleton in existence or being a formless figure of shadow and goop and also he has the voice of koh the face stealer. so. actually yeah maybe it's his own fault he's the king and lord of darkness and evil actually

[steponremix91]

Sally Kellerman, Bud Cort, and Olivia Hussey at the premiere of Brewster McCloud (1970)

[sleepingthroughmyproblems]

No way is Leonardo DiCaprio dating Gigi Hadid? She was born in 1995 and has therefore reached the absolutely GERIATRIC age of 27? What's happening to him

[killa-trav]

now it's coming out that at dortmund jadon would turn up to training late, fly out after a game for 2-3 days and he didn't get enough sleep n would spend the whole night on his playstation

what the fuck is going on

[aguacerotropical]

Japanese ppl weathering a really terrible typhoon that also led to terrifying floods (fuck climate change, this also happened in Alaska just this week!) to protest Shinzo Abes funeral have my full respect tbh

[threelionsgirl]

Hey can you write one where the reader has a crush on Mason, but he says he only sees her as a friend, and that he has a crush on the reader's friend. But after y/n moves away from him, he realizes that he was always in love with her too. Please, with a happy ending!!!!

confessing love | mason mount

warnings: fluff, a bit of angst maybe? word count: 3767 notes: I LOVED THIS ONE!! remembering that english is not my first language, this has not been revised!!! i hope you like it :) masterlist | requests are open!

Y/N's camera lens traveled around the pitch during Manchester United's training sessions. And she loved her work as a visual media creator for the club's social networks. Combining her passion for football with her passion for photography was perfect. She was living a long-planned dream. Y/N was trying to get the best angles of the training session led by coach Ten Hag. She laughed a little when she saw Rashford and Casemiro play with the ball through the camera lens. He captured good moments of the two of them until she looked for her next target. That's when her lens passed Mason Mount. Y/N always liked to take pictures of Mason last because when her camera found him, it was hard to take the focus off him. She followed him all over the pitch, looking at him through her hyperfocus lens and taking more photos of him than of any other player. Of course, she knew it was a bit unprofessional, but no one needed to know, since she was the only one operating that camera and on the website and social media, all the players received the same publicity. The ones that remained, she kept in her personal collection.

Mason was running around the pitch, until he received a ball from Shaw, which he took on his chest and sent into the back of the net. Y/N made a point of capturing every moment as he celebrated by smiling, messing with his hair in a cute way and every bit of how his body reacted and the expressions on his face. Until he looked directly at her and realized that the camera was pointing at him. Mason began to make faces that made Y/N laugh as she recorded everything, without missing a beat. The truth was that Y/N was very friendly with all the players, they were nice and good company for going out and doing something fun, and nothing was more than friendship, but she had to admit that she had developed a special bond with Mason. She knew that with him, she didn't just want friendship, it was much more than that. But she felt too cowardly to admit it to him. He came running towards her, and she lowered the camera, finally taking the focus off him. She didn't need a camera to observe Mason Mount when she had him so close. "Too much work today, Y/N?"

"I'm always very busy, Mase." Y/N wiping the camera lens. Ever since she'd discovered her crush on Mason, she'd been a bit awkward around him because she found it hard to look at him and talk to him without looking like a lovesick idiot. A shiver ran through her body when he wrapped his arms around her shoulders and squeezed with his other hand. "You need a break to relax, you work too much." Y/N was going to ask him what his ideas were for her to relax, but she wasn't so bold. "Today is Maya's birthday." Maya worked in PR at United and was one of her best friends at the club. Working with her was amazing. They always went out together whenever they could. "Oh, I know, she invited me." Mason smiled in a different way, which made a thousand butterflies fly around in Y/N's stomach. "So, I'll see you tonight, right?" She hugged the camera, too nervous to answer and stuttering Y/N just shook her head up and down. Mason left a kiss on her cheek and pulled away when Ten Hag called out to him. Y/N stood there watching Mason walk away for God knows how long, that kiss on the cheek was capable of melting her entire system. She was so caught up that she didn't even notice when Marcus approached.

She could say that Marcus was one of her best friends. He was the first person she had been close to since she started working at the club. She felt she could count on him for anything. "When are you going to tell him?" "What a fright, Rash!" She looked at him unconcerned. "You need to stop this!" "And you need to stop running away from my questions, Y/N." "I don't know what you're talking about…" "Come on, you don't lie to me. You've got a thing for Mase." They both watched Mason from afar. She looked at her friend and rolled her eyes. "How do you know that?" "I know you, honey." He laughed, pinching her nose. "Do you think I don't notice how you spend hours and hours stalking him with that camera?" "Yeah, I have a crush on him, so what?" "So you're really going to leave without exposing your feelings?" Marcus raised an eyebrow and Y/N bit her lip. A few weeks ago, she had received an offer to become a Real Madrid staffer. Moving to Spain wasn't in her plans, but the offer was too good to turn down. Her photos had been successful, and she was getting recognized for her talent, but she still didn't know if she would actually accept. She loved Manchester, she loved United, and she loved the players with whom she was already familiar. To change would be to leave that behind. Leaving Mason behind.

"I haven't decided yet. It's a good opportunity, of course, but…" "I bet having Mason would make you say no to the proposal." "Rash, you don't know what you're talking about." "I'm just suggesting it. I'm going to miss you, and I'd rather you didn't go, but I understand, and I'm advising you, if you go, go without this weight on your back." Rashford winked at her and turned back to the pitch. Y/N took one last look at the two of them before heading to the administration building, she needed to edit those photos and publish them. She knew she had a big decision to make, wondering if her friend Marcus was right. Would Mason be a good reason to make her stay in England?

Later, Y/N was at home getting ready for Maya's party when she received a message from Mason:

mase: do u want me to come and pick u up?

The truth was that Y/N didn't need a ride, but Mason's invitation was impossible to refuse. The minutes she spent in his car in the passenger seat, watching his profile drive through the streets of Manchester, were almost magical. So she quickly replied that yes, she wanted his ride. What she really meant was that she wanted his company at every moment of her life. She finished getting ready in an hour, which was about the time Mason pulled up in front of her house. In the car he seemed very excited about Maya's birthday party and for some reason that was giving Y/N confidence. Maybe Marcus was right, and she should get those feelings out soon before they suffocated her. Maya's birthday was taking place in a fancy hotel and Y/N was enjoying it with her friends, her Manchester United friends and, of course, Mason. He was great company at parties, always daring her to knock back shots of booze or asking her to dance. On the one hand, Y/N loved him, but on the other she felt sad. Every touch he made on her waist or anywhere on her body sent shivers down her spine, and when he looked at her smiling and fiddled with her hair without taking his eyes off her?

She couldn't resist. But the worst part was seeing other girls flirting with Mason when he was with her, and not being able to do anything about it, since Mase wasn't someone she could call her own. So she decided to hide in the bathroom for a while. What was supposed to be five minutes turned into almost thirty, and she decided to go out and look for Marcus. She needed her friend more than anything at that moment, but instead of finding him, she bumped into Mason, who looked five times more altered than the last time she'd seen him. "Mase?" "Y/N! You're gooone!" He said in that slurred, shuffling voice. "What happened to you, Mase? I leave you for a few minutes, and you decide to drink the whole bar?" He moved his mouth laughingly, and she supported him with her shoulders, helping him to walk. Mason in that state meant it was time to go home. She knew the friend she had. "Where are you taking me?"

"To your house." "I'm usually the one who takes the girls there." "Funny." She laughed and pulled him away. They arrived in the parking lot and Y/N guided Mason to where he had parked his thousand-euro car. "The key." She held out her hand, and Mason slipped his hand into the front pocket of his pants without complaint and handed it to her. He wouldn't let just anyone drive his car, but in that state he either obeyed Y/N or he obeyed Y/N. "There. Here we are. You can get to your room on your own, can't you?" she said from outside, in front of Mason's door, who didn't look very well, but well enough to get into his own house. He looked at her worriedly. "How are you going home?" "I'll manage, Mase. I can order an Uber." She shrugged, wanting to get out of there. "Not at all. You can sleep here. I'll drop you home in the morning." He suggested, taking her by the hand and leading her into his house, but Y/N didn't move, letting go of her hand. Mason seemed somewhat loving, but she needed to remind herself that whatever he was doing at that moment, he wasn't in his most sober state. Alcohol could easily manipulate his actions, and she didn't know what was real. "I'm not sleeping at your place."

"Why not?" He frowned at the refusal. Normally, Y/N never said no to him. "You've slept here before." "There were other people along." She said quietly. It was those parties that got a bit out of hand and went on until late, and everyone thought it was safer to spend the night than to drive drunk. "And what's wrong with not having other people?" He asked, moving closer. So close that Y/N could have sworn she felt something in her body fail. It could have been her heartbeat or her breathing. She gave a half-smile, refusing to answer that question. There were all the problems in the world spending the night with a guy she couldn't call her own. It was too much of a disservice to her poor heart. "You look strange." He pointed out, looking right into her eyes. "You were weird the whole party." "I wasn't."

"I know you, Y/N. Yes, you were." Mason took another step forward, holding one of her shoulders. "You don't want to tell me why?" Y/N analyzed for a few seconds, hating that moment. She knew Mason wouldn't stop until he got an answer out of her and that's when she thought of the response she'd gotten from Rashford that morning. So she took a deep breath, making one of the two decisions she needed to make at that point in her life. "This is going to sound really stupid…" "You can tell me anything." "Look…" She looked away, but Mason held her face and his touch felt so good, it brought the best feeling in the world to her heart. "I'll say it straight away, okay?" He warned and Mason nodded, interested. Y/N took one last breath and quickly poured the words over him. "I like you, that's all. I know we're friends and that I shouldn't like you, but I do and I couldn't keep it to myself any longer. I like you. Holy shit! I didn't want to like you, but I do, so what am I going to do? Hell! It's not my fault, I'm not in charge of my heart. Mase, I can't be around you without my heart leaping three hundred times and I need to know what you're thinking right now!"

Mason blinked, a little stunned by the revelation, and felt something bad inside him. The alcohol in his brain wasn't letting him think straight. "Shit…" He muttered softly, letting go of her shoulder. "Y/N…" "What?" she asked, bracing herself for what was perhaps the worst thing she could hear.

"You know I think you're amazing, right? I like you a lot Y/N you, but not like that…" He concluded and the sentence almost made Y/N's world come crashing down. That was definitely not happening. She felt pathetic. "I was actually interested in Maya…" Mason swallowed before saying it and that was the end of the world for Y/N. She could deal with unrequited love, but a relationship between Mason and her best friend? It was too much for her. "Oh my God…" She took a step back, wanting to get out of there and holding back any tears that might fall. "Mason." She whispered and he continued talking as if that wasn't the worst thing he was doing. "I'm really sorry." Y/N couldn't look them in the eye, the street seemed less painful. "We can still be friends after that, right? Nothing have to change…"

She suddenly looked at him, hurt. How could he ask her that after saying he liked her best friend? "I-I…" She stammered. "I don't know if I can go through with this until I'm sure I've gotten rid of all my feelings for you. Bye, Mason." Y/N turned her back on him and walked away as fast as she could. She couldn't do that. Walking away was the best option, until she no longer felt anything, until she saw Mason Mount as just a friend. The problem was that for Y/N it could last a lifetime.

A few days later…

Mason felt strange, he could even say a little unhappy. An unbearable emptiness. Ever since Y/N had left him, he hadn't seen her for a few days. What was that withdrawal? He couldn't even say. He even thought about asking Maya, but he felt like such an idiot after that conversation. He really had an interest in the girl, but after what had happened with Y/N, Mason didn't care, he just wanted to get that feeling out of him. Because his current condition was: he missed a girl with whom he was hopelessly in love. Like almost all of his clubmates, he was always asked what was going on between him and Y/N. Mason always denied any love interest. But it wasn't possible! Could it be that only they didn't see what everyone else saw? Or at least, only he didn't see? Maybe what he felt for Maya was just physical attraction and the person he really liked was Y/N. It had been so long since he had liked anyone and when this person appeared, Mason was terrified.

She was the one who greeted him at the CT with a smile every day and made him laugh with the photos she took of him while he was distracted. It was fun how she would blackmail him with those photos to ask for favors like buying her a milk shake or autographing his shirts. Even though Mason never said no to her, he loved their dynamic. He also liked having her at all his games, cheering him on and giving him a big hug when the game was over. Shit, Mason wanted that back. He wanted Y/N back in his life, he understood her pulling away, but he wasn't going to let it continue.

"Rash, do you know where Y/N is?" He asked Marcus as soon as training was over. "Y/N? She's resigned, Mase." Marcus replied a little sadly, but it had been Y/N's decision and he would respect it. Mason, on the other hand, looked shocked. "What do you mean?" "She received an offer from Real Madrid. Yesterday was her last day. She must be on her way to Madrid…" Marcus looked at his watch on his cell phone. He had managed to say goodbye to Y/N the day before. "Right now." "You can't be serious." "Serious. We've lost the best photographer in the world to a Spanish team." He felt a little guilty. "Do you think…"

"If she went to stay away from you?" Marcus concluded, holding Mason's shoulder. "Don't think too much of yourself, the proposal was very good, but yeah, I think what you said to her may have influenced your final decision." "Damn. I was such an idiot." "Yes, you were." "Do you think I can reverse it?" "If you want to, you can, but please, man, try not to hurt my friend anymore." That hurt, but Mason nodded and understood that it was up to him. Marcus gave him some details, but told him that it might be too late. Y/N was leaving for Madrid at that moment and Mason might have to wait a little longer. Mason found himself defeated for only a few minutes before he realized that if he really wanted her forgiveness, he would have to want it badly and to show it he would have to start right then and there. He left CT like a hurricane in his car and drove as fast as he could to the airport. He wore a hood over his head to avoid being recognized, it would slow him down too much. He looked at the screen and boarding for the next flight to Madrid had already started and Y/N was probably already in the departure lounge. He went to the nearest counter and bought the first ticket he saw. At the counter, while waiting to pay, he thought he was acting out a scene from the clichéd movies Y/N liked, but he couldn't have cared less. Y/N was worth it and if he hadn't been such an idiot, none of this would have been necessary. After passing through the boarding gate, Mason looked as quickly as possible for the flight gate, when he found it he saw the queue forming and Y/N was currently first in line, handing over her documents before getting on the plane.

"Y/N." He shouted so loudly that not only Y/N but most of the people present looked in his direction. She felt someone taking her headphones off and when she looked back she was surprised. "Mason?" The girl went static when she saw him. He came closer and she took the document back and walked over to him. It hurt so much to see him again, but she was curious and a little surprised. "What are you doing here?" "I'm asking you. I can't believe you'd leave without saying goodbye to me." She looked at him a little guiltily. "Besides, you forgot something of yours with me." "What?" "Me." He said quietly, holding her face. At that point, Y/N's brain was going haywire, as if she couldn't imagine that Mason Mount would come to the airport after her to propose. "Answer me this, why did you say that day that you didn't want to like me?" She swallowed. "Why… Because I knew you wouldn't like me back and that would ruin our friendship, like it did." "And how did you know that was true?" Mason arched an eyebrow and Y/N looked around for something to get her out of that situation.

"Well, you told me yourself." "I lied." Mason shrugged his shoulders feeling bad, even worse with the face Y/N was making. "Oh, you lied? Lied that you were interested in my best friend? What did you want with that? To make me feel bad?" Y/N took a deep breath because at that moment she was starting to get angry. "That hurt me so much, you have no idea, and now you come here after me thinking I'm going to be with you whenever you want, Mason?" She finished saying it and took a step back, at which point Mason realized that things were getting very bad for him. He approached her holding her hands, willing to make things right with Y/N. "I'm not proud of it, it's just that I was a bit terrified Y/N. I haven't liked anyone like that for a long time and I loved our friendship, but I didn't even know how much I liked you." He confessed and Y/N had to admit that it shook something inside her. "I found myself smiling for no reason until I realized that I was thinking of you. And that I couldn't waste another day of my life without you. Please give me another chance!" Y/N hesitated. This was difficult because on the one hand she was very hurt, but on the other, the fact that Mason Mount had come up to her in an airport and declared himself like that was all she had ever wanted.

"But what about Maya?" "I have nothing to do with Maya, I never have, and I don't want to. Please understand that." Y/N hesitated for a moment, looking at Mason for sincerity. She sighed, allowing herself to consider the possibility of a second chance. "Mason, it's not easy to forget what happened, but…" She looked into his eyes. "If you've really changed, if you're willing to be honest this time, then maybe we can try again." Mason let out a relieved sigh, his eyes shining with gratitude. "I promise, Y/N, no lies. I want to be more than a friend to you, I want to be someone you can trust." Y/N smiled, giving in to the moment. "All right, Mason. Let's start again, but this time, no secrets. Bring out your true feelings from the start." Mason agreed, determined to make things right. "I'd like that. And I promise I'll make up for any hurt I've caused." The two hugged, deciding to put the past behind them. "So, what's the next step?" Y/N asked, trying to keep things light. Mason smiled. "A date, maybe? Something simple, just to get us started."

Y/N laughed. "That sounds good. But this time, no made-up love triangles, right?" Mason laughed along with her. "Absolutely. Just the two of us, no complications, but…." "What?" "Let me kiss you now? I didn't want to wait until the date." Y/N laughed along with him, letting herself go and kissing Mason as she had always dreamed. And so, with laughter and a promise of honesty, Mason and Y/N took the first step towards a new beginning, redefining not just their friendship, but building something more meaningful and true.

[leajdh]

Gold rush

Chapter four: Ayo, fuck this. Are we dating? Are we fucking? Are we best friends? Are we something in between that? I wish we never fucked, and I mean that. But not really..

He was just a few more steps away from becoming a living legend. Already praised by the media as the honored one, he made a grave mistake which not only put his Ice Hockey career on hold, it disappointed even his most loyal fans so much so that his reputation sank to an all-time low.

Then he meets you; a retired figure skating champion who is now trying to find her purpose in life after her triumphs, all while still being loved and cherished by the media and public likewise.

Satoru Gojo sees his chance to not only get back unto the rink, but also to regain his former popularity.

But he soon realizes it will be a lot harder to get on your good side, because he's everything you despise combined into one person.

Will you give him a second chance and allow him to redeem himself, or is this going to be the match for your life time?

Gojo Satoru x reader (first person narrator)

Ice Hockey AU

FAKE DATING TROPE

Enemies to lovers

English isn't my first language, so expect some grammar errors

18+!!

LINK TO ALL CHAPTERS:

Against all odds, everything is going smoothly. 

It’s only been two days since the picture was posted on my instagram, so I shouldn’t crow too soon, but how can I not when the wildcard Satoru Gojo follows all my rules without any objections?

It’s just too good to be true, but it is true. 

At least for now.

We haven’t really started yet with creating a narrative. So far we just handled everything between each other. I sent him a list of rules that he agreed on and we both signed a contract. Our contract likewise our fake relationship needed an expiration date, so we came up with 21 days after his first game at the Stanley cup. 

With that we make sure that people don’t suspect us from faking the relationship. We also decided the reason why we will break up is the long distance, something like; My life and home is in Idaho and his life and career is in New York City. I know, not romantic at all, but realistic. 

Coming to my rules, they are simple but strict.

Satoru isn’t allowed to post anything without asking me beforehand (exceptions are campaign pictures and videos).

The reason for this rule is simple. I don’t trust Satoru to not post anything stupid that will ruin the narrative I’m going for. With the picture of his head on my thigh, he set a tone for our relationship from which I want to break away. Everything will be family friendly from now on. A lovestory Disney would want to cinematize.

This rule also includes no talking to the media unless his team (which I am part of) approves.

2. Decluttering his social media.

Initially I thought I had to do much more. Suguru told me after the crash Satorus PR-team deleted every party picture or video. It didn’t matter if alcohol was in the frame or not. All this is gone. However, I decluttered even more. Yesterday I started my research on the people Satoru follows. Without mercy I deleted everyone I thought wasn't good for his image to be associated with. The only problematic one I didn’t unfollow is one of his teammates. Toji Fushiguro. 

Apparently a welcome visitor at casinos and race tracks. Bad enough for me already, but the cherry on top are the allegations from older women that, before he became a pro ice hockey player, he used to scam them for money and housing. 

But I looked more into it and I would rather say these old hags did not really get scammed. More so they were his sugar mamas and now they are mad at him for leaving them. Hence there was never a criminal prosecution. 

The biggest problem with Satorus social media are all the girls he follows. 

With a lot of them, he publicly hooked up. All gorgeous women; either models, singers or actresses. I gulped at that and thought on how to handle it. My initial thought was to simply not do anything. Just let them follow each other. I don’t want to come across as the girlfriend who is super jealous and if the media figures out (which they will) that Satoru unfollowed all his former liaisons, it will be a headline and I will be the villain. 

But this issue clashes with another rule.

3. For the entirety of our fake relationship neither him nor me are allowed to engage in any romantic or sexual relationship with another person. Doesn’t matter if it is happening in real-life or just online. Nothing that can cause any fanfare.

Personally I do not think it will be a problem for me but I have less (a lot less) faith in Satoru. He is known for his playboy lifestyle, so I was generally surprised as he agreed so easily to this rule. Even as I wanted to include a paragraph in our contract that I am given the honor to cut his penis of if he cheats. 

Sadly Ichiji told me such a paragraph isn’t legally allowed. 

It would have definitely strengthened my trust. 

Back to rule 2. I therefore just unfollowed some of them. Some had been canceled before for actually serious stuff like internet scams or selling their fans overpriced junk. As soon as I saw a post with CODE: whateverhernameis20 I unfollowed. 

4. I created an excel list with amazing athletes, especially female ice hockey players for him to follow. As an athlete himself, he needs to be more supportive and generally show more interest in what is going on in the sports world. 

On different dates he will follow certain athletes so it doesn’t look suspicious that he randomly decides to follow a ton of them. Everything in nibbles. 

Saving his reputation is a climb not a shortcut. 

5. He attends AA meetings each week. For this rule I was given an annoyed snort from Satoru but he did not say anything after I looked daggers at him. I will drive him there and pick him up, no excuses. 

Five rules but the most important one isn’t for him. It is for myself. 

I need to try to trust him. 

Trusting someone isn’t easy, especially after everything he did to me. But I have to overcome my issues with him to make this work. 

In spite of everything, I want him to be loved by his fans again. I want the best for him.

Only when he succeeds will I be able to make peace with myself and move on. 

Every therapist would shake their head and rip out their hair at this statement but I never learned how to correctly get over things and move on. All I know are challenges and they made me move forward, so I will handle this my way. The way even Suguru thinks would suit me the best. 

Today I am late as I run down the tribune in my boots. Satoru is already training, skating sideways in zigzag lines as Mei Mei screams instructions at him. 

Stumbling down the stairs I notice Suguru, who’s intensely watching the training. With a huff I fall next to him on the bench. “Sorry, I’m late but I couldn’t find the pink stockings off the set. I hope white is fine too”, I breathe as I tie my white skates on. Suguru turns his head to the side and watches me, blinking a few times. 

As for today, we will take the first official photo of Satoru and I together. Essentially confirming our relationship. So far everything is just rumors, neither of us has confirmed anything. With this picture we will officially start the fake dating storyline.

“White’s his favorite color and it suits you, you look really pretty”, his eyes are glued to my face and he smiles. Before I have the chance to turn red, Mei Meis' scream startles me. 

“You’re late!” 

I look at her as she is now turned towards me. Apologetic, I put my hands up and Suguru snickers beside me.

“How did your ears survive her screaming all those years?”, Suguru asks me as I finish tying my skates. I put a hand behind my ear and joke: “What did you say?” 

He laughs lightly again and I am happy about his reaction. 

Standing up I stretch a bit before I go on the ice. Upon hearing no more skates scratching the ice, I look at the rink and see Satoru staring at me, which sends a shiver down my spine. 

Since the day I agreed on being his fake girlfriend I have had a hard time maintaining eye contact with him, hell, even being near him makes me unbelievably nervous. 

Worst of all, I can’t tell why. I should actually be more relaxed around him since we buried our conflict and work together now, but as soon as I feel his freaky blue eyes on me, I feel like a deer in the headlights. 

Suguru softly strokes his index finger over my hip bone. I quickly turn my head towards him.

“Hey, are you alright?”, he asks and looks at me with a frown. His glances never make me nervous. When he looks at me, it feels nice and warm. Meanwhile Satorus peeks make me feel vulnerable like he can see right through me. 

All flaws, all my thoughts, open for him to see and mock. His stare gives me a weird sense of self doubt. 

I shake the thought off. 

“Just feeling a bit fussy”, I sigh: “You know, this is all really weird.” 

“I know”, he grins: “but it will all work out, so no need to worry.” I wish I could be as much of an optimist as Suguru. He gets up too and I notice the significant height difference between us. Even with my skates on he is taller than me. Half a head shorter than Satoru, but Satorus is also freakishly tall. 

“You are going on the ice too?”, I point at  Sugurus' feet which are in skates. 

“Somebody has to take the pictures”, he responds. 

“Right”, I reply with a neutral smile but internally I am pouting and stomping my feet. 

This makes everything even harder. Playing all lovey-dovey with Satoru will be hard enough, but now having Suguru focus on all the details and probably giving pointers. 

I should have stayed in bed. 

We walk down to the rink entry. I throw the blade protectors to the side and step on the ice, gliding over it with ease. I stop next to Satoru, whose entire focus is on me. 

“Good to see you, princess. Looking like there was no pea under your mattress”, he grins and I twist my mouth in confusion. 

“The princess and the pea. Did your dad never read you fairytales?” 

He knows the answer to that, but he still likes to get a rise out of me. 

“I know the fairytale but your comment still makes no sense.”

He skates closer to me and I focus on his nose, so it at least looks like I am looking in his eyes. 

“It’s no fun explaining it.”

“No one is forcing you.”

“Well, maybe there was no pea under your mattress but you definitely stood up with the wrong foot.”

I roll my eyes and skate a bit backwards. 

“It is my way to say that you look well rested.”

“Thank you?”, I frown, unsure what well rested means. A weird compliment? A strange gag? Whatever it is, nothing about us screams boyfriend and girlfriend. 

“And you look well exhausted.”

His hair is flat on his scalp, single pieces of hair glued to his sweaty forehead. He has reddish cheeks and sweat drops travel down his neck to his covered collarbone. He breathes still a bit heavy, the hot air he puffs out turning white due to the temperature. 

I curse myself for finding him incredibly hot at this stage. 

Why does he have to look hot all the time? 

This is unnatural!

“I’ve been here since 7am while you probably had some sweet dream about me”, he grins again, well not again. He is grinning at me the entire time. 

“You mean about your sponsors. Burberry wants inclusive rights for my public outfits, making me an ambassador.”

“No need to thank me.”

“I am not thanking you, I will thank you once Dior comes through. Checked clothes do not really suit me.”

He chuckles: “Quite picky.” 

“Are you really surprised?”

“Not at all.”

I foolishly look in his eyes and feel that shiver again. Turning my head instantly, I gulp and look for Suguru. He’s talking with Mei Mei, both of them stepping on the ice as well. As they glide towards us, I feel strong arms slinging around my shoulders from behind, holding me into place so I do not slither away. Satoru places his sharp chin on my head and exhales. I’m as frozen as the ice under my feet. 

“I know women hate this more than anything, but smile. We are in love or have you forgotten?”

He is right, but how can I smile at him if I can't even look in his eyes. This is going to be a disaster. 

“You’re messing up my hair”, is all I can mutter.

He inhales and I feel his broad chest extend against my back. His body is a living heater in this cold hall. 

Warmth spreads through my entire body, especially in places I should not feel hot for him. 

“Nonsense, you look like an angel”, his chin moves from my head to my shoulder as he leans more forward, his arms still around me. 

“Have I ever told you how much your little skirts turn me on?”

My breath is stuck in my throat, even if I had something on my mind to return, I physically couldn’t.

“Well, have I?”

Why does he have to torture me? I shake my head, still unable to move much less talk. 

He huffs disappointed. “I would prefer if you used your words, but I will teach you another time.”

He instantly lets go of me and I can barely stand on my wobbly legs, only now noticing that he held me really secure. Before he skates past me towards Suguru and Mei Mei, who are only a few feet away now, he pinches my left butt cheek. 

“Now smile, we are in love, don’t forget it”, without giving me a second look, but I know he is grinning like the devil himself. 

I will kill him. 

“Are you ready?”, Mei Mei asks me. With a dry mouth and still in a state of shock I nod. 

I’m the furthest away from being ready. 

After what felt like hours, we still did not manage to take a good picture. We tried different poses, tried to fake spontaneous pictures and even left the rink to take some pictures on the tribune. I cross my arms over my chest and try to remain positive. Just one good picture and I can get away from him. 

Get a grip!

The worst thing is, Satoru is a natural talent. He looks perfect on every photo, while I look- “It looks like you just met a fan!”, Mei Mei tells me: “You know you can look at him, right?” Why does everyone have to torture me? As if this entire situation isn’t awkward and embarrassing enough. 

I sigh loudly and throw my hands up in frustration.  “I’m trying”, I mutter. I can’t even look in his eyes for a second, before turning my face away and becoming a nervous wreck. 

“Then stop with this customer-service-smile!”, Mei Mei spits back. She isn’t known for having patience. 

“I don’t know, each pose seems way too unnatural. I don’t like how the pictures turn out”, even if I had been able to look at Satoru all lovey-dovey, the pictures wouldn’t give me the vibe I want. 

“Usually you aren’t being that difficult”, she adds and I want to strangle her. 

Satoru says nothing, just leaning on the edge of the rink, waiting for instructions. He hasn’t tried anything funny, but his gaze never leaves me and I am too well aware of that. 

I shake the goosebumps off. 

“I just don’t like it…”, I mumble and Mei Meis nose flares. I can tell she is angry with my behavior. 

Before the situation can escalate, Suguru suggests: “How about we try it again tomorrow with a new approach? It has no value to try and force it now, besides Satoru has a massage appointment in thirty minutes.”

I don’t want another try, I want to get this over with, but Suguru is right, as always. Whatever block I have in my mind, it is my problem and I need to fix it. I chew on nothing and act as nonchalant as possible. 

“Okay fine, tomorrow.”, I hum and want to set off, just getting out of the rink and home. But Suguru stops me just as I am about to leave the ice. “Hey, just so you know, you did well. This”, he swirls his index finger in a circle “isn’t easy. It takes time to get used to each other.”

He is so nice. I sometimes hate him for it. 

“But Satoru and you will be a great team, I can feel it”, he cracks a crooked smile at me and I smile back.

“That’s the smile I wanted!”, Mei Mei screams over and I instantly lose it, looking back and forth between her and Suguru, whose smile turns softer. 

“I will see you tomorrow”, I step off the rink and wave good-bye to Mei Mei and ignore Satorus gaze again. 

I’m such a coward. 

With a groan I fall on the couch next to Utahime, who is eating soup and watches TV. She turns down the volume and pats my head. 

“From your reaction I guess it didn’t go well.”

I just groan more into the soft cushion of the couch.

“What happened? Do I need to kill him? You know I would do it.”

Utahime was against this entire fake relationship. She can’t stand Satoru, thinking the same things as me. He’s arrogant, self-centered and reckless. And his good looks do nothing for her. 

I wish I was immune to it too. 

“No, not he is the problem. I am!”, I flip over on my back and look up at her: “I get so uptight and irritable when I am around him. I don’t know how to explain it and it affects the photos.” 

She frowns.

“You know what this sounds like?”, then she gives me a small grin. “Stop, no, it isn’t like that at all.” And it really isn’t. 

The more I think about it, the more it is clear that everything is connected to the first day we met. Hell, we nearly had sex in my car and afterwards we wanted to blackmail each other. Not the best way to start a fake relationship, but I can’t tell her. Nobody knows about any of this and I am just glad no one asked how Satoru even got a picture of his head on my thigh. I’m a good liar but I have no tale for this one.

“So what is it then?” 

“I don’t know”, I sob in my hands. Hime just keeps on patting my hair. 

“You can always quit, right?” 

Another slight fabrication I told her, so she wouldn’t get too concerned. Contractually I’m bound to Satoru until our end date. 

“Yes, but I don’t want to”, I sigh: “I just need to get a grip.” Suguru is right, it takes time to adjust to the entire case. 

I managed tougher challenges. 

I can do it. 

“And rethink this entire photoshoot. It looked like we were high schoolers going to our first prom and my parents forced us to take pictures. Maybe we should just hire paparazzi, who take the first picture of us together on a date or whatever”, I sigh, frustrated with myself. 

She still pats my head and slurps her soup, just allowing me to let my mind figure out something on its own.

“Or maybe we should just let our PR teams make it official and never post a picture. No, that’s not good either”, I grunt some more and sit up. Instead of answering me, Hime just holds a full spoon under my nose, not saying a word. I put it in my mouth and eat. She knows me. I don’t want any advice, I just want to think out loud. 

In the end I know I will find a solution. I always do. 

And if not, I still have Suguru, who seems like the true mastermind of solutions. 

He will get me. 

I can count on him. 

I spend the rest of the day running errands and buying myself a new phone using one of  Satorus cards. 

He insisted on giving me one. Not just to buy a new phone (it was his fault I threw my old one against the wall, obviously), but also for other stuff I want. I told him I don’t want his money, which he didn’t understand. Why else would I have agreed on being his fake girlfriend?

I didn’t have the guts to tell him everything Suguru and I had discussed and my five reasons, so I told him I have my own reasoning and it actually isn’t his business. 

While I said that, I got nervous again and couldn’t look at him, crossing my arms to at least look a bit confident. 

However, as I mentioned before he can see right through me and I swear to God he stared me down without saying a single word, just to make me more nervous until I had no other choice than to grab the card out of his hand and declare defeat by accepting it. 

But this arrangement has nothing to do with money. I’m not buyable. I do this to grow as a person. 

And for a new phone (again, his fault I broke it). 

After that I will put his card away and never touch it again. I do not want to be in his debt in any kind of way. 

It is better if he owes me something, which he does. Just by me agreeing to help him, he is in my debt and I would like to keep it that way. 

If he is on the edge of messing up, I can guilt trip him. If he is even really capable of feeling guilt.

At least towards me. 

I still don’t get him. How he feels towards me is an enigma. 

Does he like me? Ha, good joke. No, why should he? All we did so far was playing with one another. He wants a fake relationship with me because I’m a goody two-shoes in the public eye, not particularly because he likes me. 

Does he hate me? Also no, I would say. I don’t hate him. If I was, I wouldn’t be able to do this and so would he. 

That’s why my guess is he accepts me but doesn’t particularly like nor dislike me. Just what I feel for him. 

Yeah, because whatever I feel automatically applies to him. 

Nevertheless what I definitely know is that I am on high alert around him and he fucking knows it and uses it against me. Again a game he plays with me. Something to keep him entertained. 

Maybe that’s what he feels towards me. He sees me as a little plaything to help him through the boring time in recovery. 

So much for trying to trust him. Not even in my own weird scenarios do I give him the benefit of the doubt that he isn’t a sadistic ass. 

Does he really need me to save his career or is it all a charade? 

I can’t get this bile of a thought out of my head. He talked too much about my father, who is the coach of his archenemy team. I have the eerie feeling it is all connected to him and Satoru is lying to me. Lying that it has nothing to do with my father. 

In the end I have to accept I’m not a special snowflake like Suguru made me seem like in our conversation. Satoru could have chosen hundreds of other girls with a similar reputation as mine without the ties to one of his archenemies. 

And again, so much for trying to trust him.

Trust takes time, especially after everything Satoru and I have been through. He probably doesn’t trust me either. 

Maybe in the long run I am in the wrong and Satoru has no interior motives, but as long as I am not a hundred percent certain, I will have my doubts. 

Keep your fake boyfriend close, but your enemy closer, and Satoru is both for me. 

After all I didn’t not hear the final whistle. The match is still on and so far we have the same score. 

I fall in my bed and set up my new phone, putting in my old sim card and working through all my notifications I got over the last few days. 

It is around 11pm when I suddenly get a text message. I was just looking through pinterest for some inspo pictures for tomorrow's photoshoot as a message pops up: Come over.

I instantly know it is Satorus number. Who else would want to talk to me? 

Suguru maybe, but he would word it differently, even better call me. 

No, I know it’s Satoru.

For a second I ask myself how he knows I have a new phone but he probably can see the debiting of his card on an app or something. 

Why?, I plainly wrote him back after a few minutes of contemplating.

I fucked up, I get back and my heart stops for a second. 

Fucked up? What? 

This could mean a thousand things. 

Satoru, what did you do?, I type faster than I have anticipated. 

We didn’t even announce our fake relationship and he already messed up! 

Fuck against all odds, I should have known a wildcard like him has no chance of bettering himself. 

I go from shocked to angry as he simply answers me: Just come over and I will explain.

He doesn’t need to repeat it another time. I am on my feet in an instant, changing into one of my training skirts and pulling my snow boots on to keep my legs warm. I’m in too much of a hassle to even think about putting tights on. I would only rip them. 

How could he manage to mess up already? 

I stomp outside and use my phone light to navigate to the resort. It is cold but my anger keeps me warm as I sprint up the stairs onto the third floor. From Utahime I already know Satoru stays in room 301 so I don’t even ask him over text as I knock softly on his door. I’m on the edge of kicking it in, however I don’t want to disturb Shoko, Suguru and Ichiji, who are staying on this floor too.  

After a few seconds Satoru opens the door and without an invitation I step in. 

“What did you do?”, I walked inside his room, leaning at a wall across his bed and twitching my right leg nervously, waiting for him to finally talk. 

But as always he takes his time, closing the door quietly and entering the room, sitting down on the edge of his bed with wide legs. His hair is damp. My guess is he must have showered a few minutes ago. He wears a compress shirt, which must have been a pain to put on after having freshly showered. 

I try to only conduct that thought. 

Not how unbelievable tight it fits around his muscles and flexes perfectly with every move he makes. Focusing on his pants doesn’t work either. 

He wears grey sweatpants. That’s all I have to say.

If I didn’t know any better, I would say he does it to get a rise out of me. Nothing but entertainment for him. 

I will not give him this victory. I cross my arms and for the first time in forever I manage to look in his eyes. 

Anger wins over nervosity. 

“I fucked up”, he just repeats what he told me over text. 

I roll my eyes. “For fucks sake, what did you do?”, I want an answer now. No more beating around the bushes. A clear answer.

“I fucked up by believing in you”, his eyes wander from my exposed thighs to my eyes, looking sharp and challenging in a way.

“Eh?”, I mutter and frown, being flabbergasted. He just leans back on his elbows and stares at me. My anger leaves and my confusion mixes with the overall nervosity I feel when I am with him. I instantly can’t keep up the eye contact and look elsewhere. My mind starts to race. I can’t think of a reason why he should not believe in me. 

I mean, yeah my doubts about him are good reasons but he doesn’t know about my inner thoughts. 

Right?

Yes, right. He is not a mindreader, even though when he looks at me in this certain way I feel like he is. 

I hate his piercing blue eyes. They freak me out so much. Of course I think he can read my mind. His type of eye color would be given to supernatural beings in movies. Beings able to read minds. 

He laughs deeply and cuts me instantly out of my thoughts. I dare to look at him again. His focus is still completely on me and I clasp my arms firmer around me to calm myself down. 

“I believed you would be able to pull this fake relationship off, but you can’t even look at me.”

He noticed. 

Of course he did.

Fuck. 

I take a deep breath and act nonchalant, giving him a skittish smile. 

“You called me over in the middle of the night to tell me that? Are you serious?”

“Yes, I am. So what’s your problem?”, he counters. 

“I have none”, I lie. 

“Lie”, he immediately fires back.

“I was just frustrated with the whole thing, like come on. The photos looked so fabricated in the worst way.” 

“Because they are”, he blurts and tilts his head to the side, analyzing me. God, I hate his glance on me. 

“Duh, Sherlock, but it shouldn’t look like it”, I huff and turn my head to the side. 

He holds himself more up from the bed and grins: “Well, and aren’t people in love supposed to be able to look at each other?” 

I have no answer for that. I’m caught in a dilemma, again. He knows exactly how to get me and he enjoys it. 

“So I will ask again, what’s your problem?”

He won’t let go of this theme until I answer him and too bad he seems to be able to read through all my lies. 

I contemplate on trying another lie or just sprint out of his room, which would probably be easier than feeding him another fabrication. 

However I can’t run away from him or lie my way through this fake relationship. 

In the end I agreed on our deal and talking openly about my struggles is hard and even embarrassing, especially in front of Satoru, but I would rather want him to see me as an emotional fool than a wimp. 

And I would be damned to be the one quitting this deal. 

Letting him win, no. 

Even when this shouldn’t be a competition, I can’t stop seeing everything between us as a spiel. Surely I need to accept the rules have changed and now we are playing as a unit and if I go against him, it will bite me in the ass as well. 

Granted, I still don’t trust him and probably never fully will, but I need to be able to communicate with him. 

“You”, I answer quickly and give him a side-eye. That’s all I can muster. 

“Me?”

“You”, I say again without a further explanation. 

“Care to elaborate”

Not really, but I have to. I lean against the wall and I am thankful for the dime light in this room. It’s just illuminated by the bedside lamp and the moonlight outside the window. 

“Just everything”, I let it slip out and finally decided to be honest: “in the matter of a few hours we went from wanting to blackmail each other to faking a relationship. We lied, argued and I threw your lunch at you. We nearly even-”, I stop but Satoru ends my sentence: “fucked.”

“Correct.”, I bite my lip: “And I could ignore all this and try my best to move on, but you keep looking at me in a way that makes my skin crawl.”

I wanted to add his teasing words and touches too, but then I would have to admit this affects me and for now telling him I have a problem with the way he looks at me is enough to confess. 

Small steps. 

“I look at you like I look at everyone else”, he sits straight on the bed and has his arms crossed too. I don’t believe him, but he’s more stubborn than me. If he doesn’t admit it on his own, he will never, even when I would call him out on his bullshit. 

If he doesn’t want to be honest, I will be dishonest too.

“Good, maybe I just have a general problem with your eyes.”

“My eyes are the problem now?”

“Yeah, your freaky blue eyes.”

He laughs deeply again and his white teeth beam in the light moonshine. 

“This is a first one. People normally find my eyes quite beautiful.”

They are. 

In a strange way. 

But I would never tell him.

His intensely colored eyes aren’t the actual problem. I know it, he knows it. It is the way he looks at me with them. It would freak me out with everyone, but his special eyes make it even harder on me. 

“Okay, got it”, he smoothly gets on his feet and walks over to a shelf. Rummaging in the dark through a section he pulls out a sweat headband. I watch him curiously as he slides it over his forehead and over his eyes.

“Problem solved.”

I start to laugh in disbelief.

“This doesn’t solve anything, Satoru. You can’t forever walk around blindfolded.”

He shakes his head and stands tall, looking in my direction. 

“Not forever, just until you are comfortable around me”, he says and for whatever reason he actually seems serious. 

“This is so stupid”, I mutter and get my full weight back on my legs, no longer leaning against the wall but my arms are still crossed and the frown never leaves my face. 

“Stupid is that my girlfriend can’t even look in my eyes without getting flustered.”

“I’m not getting flustered.”

“Sure”, he buzzes and I pucker my lips at that. 

He is right, but I would never tell him.

I hate it when he is right. Which he sadly often is. 

“Are you looking at me?”, he asks as he steps towards his bed with confidence and sits down again. Weirdly enough he is good at being blindfolded. 

“Right at your blindfold”, I answer and pronto earn a smirk from him. 

“Good girl, we are making progress.”

I snort at his comment and tap my foot on the floor. 

“What now?”, I ask and curse myself for getting a heat flush in my cheeks.

Satoru pats on the spot next to him on his bed. I do him the favor and sit down, his head immediately turning towards me as my weight dents the mattress. “Personally I would suggest that you let me fuck this issue out of your brain.”

I roll my eyes.

“Don’t roll your eyes at me, young lady.”

“How did you know?”, I look at the sweatband. It is a thick material that completely covers his eyes. No way he can see me.

“I just know you”, he grins from ear to ear. 

“Creep”, this comment even earned me a wider smile from him. 

“Yeah, your suggestion is not happening”, I quickly add before he continues his shenanigans. 

A big pout appears on his face, which gains him another eye roll from my side. For him to even suggest this out of funsies is moronic.

But what am I even expecting, he literally just blindfolded himself. 

Stupid.

Wait.

I sit next to him and look in his face without getting nervous. It works? Weirdly enough. 

God, I am pathetic. I’m really getting nervous from his stares. How did I ever win Gold medals when just his eyes make me uncomfortable? I had millions of eyes on me and it never bothered me. 

I need to get a grip. Now. 

“No, we will do something I never do when I am in bed with a woman”, he leans slightly forward into my space.

“Talk about ourselves and all this other stuff. That’s what you ladies like to do, right?”, another smirk.

“A creep and a sexist too”, this time I didn't roll my eyes. Satoru laughs heavily and lets his back fall flat onto the mattress. His arms over his head as he continues to chuckle with his shirt rolled up, exposing his lower stomach, which moves with his laughter. With all my willpower I maintain myself from looking more downwards. 

Damn, these grey sweatpants. They should be illegal. 

I would rather look into his eyes now than seeing this. This sight doesn’t just leave me nervous, it makes me think of the night in my car as I nearly said ‘fuck it’ and would have given in to him. 

Regret is a cruel thing, especially when I see how everything after that night has turned out. Nevertheless having sex with him wouldn’t have solved anything. 

Well, maybe I would be able to look into his eyes or let’s be real, I would be even more nervous around him. 

“What’s your favorite color?”, he asks out of nowhere. 

“Why?”, I ask instead. 

“We are supposed to be a couple and barely know about each other”, he extends his arm and snips with his finger against my forehead: “and hopefully knowing me will help you be more comfortable around me. We are in love after all.”

I rub the spot on my forehead he managed to brush and wonder again how he was able to do that with the blindfold on. After a while I answered him, telling him my favorite color. He tells me his too, but I already know it. Suguru mentioned it today. 

We start to talk. First about mundane things like favorite food and seasons, but we soon drift more down into past stories and our general life. Satoru lives in a penthouse on the Upper East Side, and as he told me the price for it, I nearly fainted. He has no siblings and comes from a family of real estate and financial moguls. They weren’t happy with his choice to become a professional Ice Hockey player but Satoru doesn’t care what they think. He never let them dictate his life. 

Unlike me who was put into skates the moment I learned to walk. I envy his carefree nature. The entire time we talked he was always positive, witty and completely pleased with himself, like he never regretted one thing in his life. He laughs at his own jokes before he even utters one word and he is quick with his remarks. 

He can keep up with me, which is something I appreciate in a person. Do I still think he is arrogant, self-centered and reckless? Yes, but I can see why. 

If I had his life and success I would probably behave the same way. You reap what you sow and Satoru was born to be a living victory. Our conversation made me understand him a tad more. 

After a while of talking, I lie down next to him, looking at the ceiling. 

“I’m sorry for being difficult. I thought it would be easier for me”, I confess and feel him move closer next to me. His head turns and even with the blindfold on I can feel his glare on me. Slowly he spins in my direction and opens his arms. Instead of giving him the hug he seems to ask for, I only frown. 

“Stop frowning and come here.”

How does he know?

With an annoyed sigh, he grabs my shoulder and pulls me to his chest, slinging his arms around me. I slightly yelp at his action but let him be as he starts to slide his hand up my back to my neck, gently rubbing circles with his thumb there. 

“It’s fine, don’t apologize. We are a team now, mate” 

“Mate?”, I grunt in disbelief. All that is left for him to do now is to give me a fist bump and hand me a can of beer before burping in my face.  

I can feel him smile into my hairline as he presses his lips against my forehead. Again, I let him. No protest, nothing. 

With him it is always against all odds.

“So what are we? We aren’t really dating, we sadly aren’t fucking and I bet you wouldn’t consider me your friend.”  

“We are-”, I pause for a good second and think. 

“We are something in between that.”

He groans lightly, dipping his nose in my hair. 

“Call me what you want, just not mate.”

As if he isn’t calling me princess every other sentence. 

“I like partner”, I add and gain another snort from him.

“What, are we a law firm?”, I push lightly against his chest, just now registering that we are really close as I particularly lie in his arms. 

“Okay, partner. I have one more question for you.”

“Mhm?”, I murmur, my eyes slightly closed as my hand stays flat on his pec. 

“Didn’t I tell you how much your little skirts turn me on?”, my breath hitches in my throat. 

“I-”, I start but never finish the sentence, heat glowing in my face. He leans down to hear me better. An act to make me more skittish. As if he doesn’t know exactly that I have no answer. 

“Don’t act coy, you knew exactly what you were doing when you decided to pull up in that outfit.” 

Did I? Maybe unconsciously. 

I try to press myself up, but he doesn’t let me go and crushes my body more into his chest. With a swift motion he rolls us to the side and hovers with his elbows next to my shoulders over me. His face inches away from mine, still with his blindfold on. The only reason I am able to look at him. 

“So let me ask you again, partner”, one of his arms travels down my side, stopping right at the end of my skirt. 

“Please let me fuck this issue out of your brain”, his fingers play with the hem of it, softly touching my skin. 

I don’t move, but my body isn’t frozen like it usually is when I am with him. This situation feels familiar, his fingers on my thighs feel familiar. It was like this when we were in my car. The same grip, the same warmth and the same rawness. I’m not sure if I can resist a second time. 

Thankfully my brain is smarter than my body. 

“This is a bad idea”, I whisper as his fingers move my skirt up my ass, exposing more of my skin. 

“It’s not, trust me. It will help both of us.”

I laugh breathlessly at his answer and stop his hand from moving in between my thighs. I love this fucking blindfold. It really helps to withstand him, but only if I keep looking at his face. Once I get his body in my sight, I will cave in.  

“How will it help you?”, I ask in a low tone. He doesn’t care about my hand holding his back from moving up. He slowly keeps going until he reaches the already soaked fabric of my panties. 

"Contractual I’m only allowed to fuck you”, he answers and it certainly isn’t written like this in our contract but in a way he is right. We aren’t allowed to have sexual contact with other people, but we can. 

I should have phrased it better. 

“and sex really helps with the enormous, gigantic, unbearing pain in my leg.”

What a charming idiot. 

Even in the dim light I see the feigned pout on his face and I would giggle at that if his fingers weren’t dipping slightly under my panties. Satoru doesn’t move his hand further in, he waits for my allowance. 

“Is that so?”, I roll my hips lightly, gaining a low hiss from him. 

“Yes.”, he snaps the hem of my panties against my skin, making me quiver. 

“Are you trying to guilt trip me?”, I blow into his ear, grazing his earlobe.

“Only if it works.”, he brushes his finger featherlight over my clothed pussy, securing a whiny moan from me.

“Where are the cameras? Want to film me a second time?”, I joke breathlessly, not able to tease him more.

“No cameras, just us. I’m serious.”, he presses his hand now on my abdomen, still waiting for my go. 

My go?

In a clear moment I realize what I’m just doing here and all my self-doubts come crashing down on me like an avalanche. I wriggle quickly back, but not entirely out of his hold. Hastily I shake my head and he can feel the movement. 

Something in his mimic switches. The playful pout is gone, making his face appear sharp and rough again. 

“Use your words”, he demands: “just say no and I will never try anything with you again, I promise.”

Instead of giving him a clear answer to his question I stutter: “What if you don’t like it?”

His forehead is immediately covered in wrinkles as he sits up, his hand appearing from under my skirt to now push down on my right hip. I know this expression so I continue to stammer an explanation: “We are on a good path, I don’t want to risk it by getting intimate.”

“I get that, but why should I not like it?” 

A logical question from his part, but a hard one to explain from my view. 

By being trimmed to be perfect all the time on ice, the urge to become excellent in every  other aspect of my life is present. Not only always looking put together, no, also always performing impeccably in everything I do. With that comes the weakness to care what other people think of me, as if to make sure my act is superb. Not only to the public, but also to people in my private life. I want to be considered perfect by them too. The fake relationship with Satoru wrench this well put together image I created of myself and it irks me. But I try to see it as a challenge to overcome it, not caring about what random people think of me. However this doesn’t apply to people I personally know. 

And I know Satoru. 

Knowing someone doesn’t instantly mean spending time with them. 

Heck, I am no virgin. I went to the Olympics. After the competitions are over, we celebrate with meaningless hook-ups. 

There is a reason the organizers put condoms in each room. 

But the keynote is meaningless. 

It was just one time and I have never seen them again. 

I didn’t have the need to perform in such a situation.

Do I still care that they thought I was good? Sure. 

But would I freak out if they thought I wasn’t? No.      

Because I certainly didn’t care at these moments. They were often quick and fun and over. A good time where I was able to finally let my guard down and enjoy being just me. 

I’m sure some of the guys didn’t even know in what segment I was competing, because I for sure didn’t know theres. In conclusion I never acted when it came to sex, because I only ever slept with a person one time. 

With that being said, with Satoru it would be different. We will spend time together. A lot of time. He knows me. Dismally the real me. 

I showed him my ugly side by being a competitive, stubborn bitch, who would have loved nothing more than to blackmail him out of my rink. 

The almost sex in my car was a performance. I wanted to trick him, so I performed in a way I knew he would like. I act and act and act to come across as perfect, but I can’t do this when it comes to real sex.

I never got complaints, but the self-doubt of not knowing for sure if I will be good, is eating me alive. I know I am good on ice, because I train my ass off. Every jump and figure gives objective points. I can count it and get a score, but intimacy is subjective. I don’t know what he likes or dislikes and even the thought of not knowing what he is thinking drives me nuts. Satoru is already an enigma to me, but bringing in the mystery of intimacy? 

No, thank you. 

Worse is, he is an expert in hook-ups. At least if I believe the tabloids. 

Screw that, I saw some of the conversations he had per DMs with some of his liaisons. He is an expert, unlike me. 

I can’t keep up this act with him. I am afraid I will slip and perform badly and this will ruin everything between us. 

In a god-awful form I would feel the need to be perfect for him, if we sleep together, because in my head he is perfect in this discipline. And now we are back at the core of all evil. My hatred for losing. Losing against him. 

What if I like it and I am certain I will but he doesn’t? I would never overcome this foul pain for failing. 

“I don’t know, it’s just a thought.”

When I’m with Satoru I mutate into an individual who’s unable to tell a good lie. 

And when it comes down to this theme, I can only try to lie. I would never tell him my real thoughts. Not with something that defines my character so harshly. Being perfect. 

“It’s a stupid thought”, he states and drops his knees to the ground, sitting in front of me, his upper body between my legs. 

I know it is a stupid thought, but it is still lingering in my mind, not going anywhere. 

“I promise I will love it.”

“You can’t promise that.”

“I can”, no hesitation in his answer. He truly believes it and this makes me even more insecure, even if he meant it to take my worries away. 

“How?”

His huge hands are sitting on my hips, engulfing my entire frame as he looks up at me, still wearing the blindfold over his eyes. As he leans more forward his broad chest parts my legs even more. 

“Because I actually like you.”

I can only roll my eyes at that statement. 

“Yeah right, I gave you so many reasons to like me.”

He cackles and presses his cheek on the inside of my thigh, his hands pulling me closer to the edge of the bed towards him. 

“Right, you did. You are an absolute cunt”, this bastard chuckles, slightly grazing his teeth along my soft skin. I don’t dare to breathe. 

“and that’s why I like you. The beloved, little ice princess for everyone but to me you are a treacherous, filthy wench, who likes nothing more than to see her opponents slowly decay on the ground, while standing winning over them. Fuck baby, we have so much in common. So please, I’m begging you, let me fuck this insecurity out of your brain.”

My jaw is stiff and jammed together. I should yell at him for the way he described me. 

But… indeed I give it to him, he is right about me. I’m not the pure Gold medalist I portrait myself to be.

Still his words don’t make any sense. Why would any person like me for being in his words a treacherous, filthy wench. Only psychos would find this real version better than the one I show off to the public. 

Well, I called him a psycho before, maybe he really is one.

No… I think?   

Eventually after going over his words over and over again, I have no other answer to this than: “Okay.”

And that is all he needs as he pulls me forward with such a force, my back falls flat on the bed. Even with the blindfold on, he knows exactly what he is doing. In a rush and equally eager motion he yanks my panties down my legs, not even being patient enough to completely pull them off my feet, as he arranges my legs on top of his shoulder. 

With a hunger I have never experienced with another person, he leaps his mouth unto my pussy. His flat tongue moves up from the hole to my clit, making me jolt.

“This is not-”, before I can continue, he slaps me firmly against my ass, making me choke on my sentence. 

“I decide how I will fuck your insecure, wet cunt, so shut up and enjoy.” 

I do as I’m told, but I can’t keep quiet for long. I moan his name, not caring about the others on this floor. Satoru isn’t bothered by this, he lets me be as loud as I want to be. 

Holding my hips tight, he is not letting me squirm away. Torture, everything is torture with him as he draws slow but steady circles with his tongue. I just know he likes to see me wince, even now when he is physically not able to do so with his blindfold. Feeling his devilish grin appear between my folds each time I whimper, makes me feel more and more like I’m losing. I talked about the debt I don’t want him to have over me. 

Well, that is now more apparent than ever before. I will never be able to repay him for this pleasure. I’m a hundred percent convinced.

“I already love it”, he declares before filling me up with two of his digits. I grab into his oh so soft and damp hair, wanting to feel him more. His fingers move in rhythm with his tongue. In and out, slowly like he wants me to suffer. Which I do.

He finds the right spot every time his fingers are back into me. I swear to God he knows it, by the way he can feel my inside starting to clamp around his insanely long fingers.

But he mocks, even ridicules me by not letting me come to my high. I’m so embarrassingly close to begging him. 

To please just let me cum. To please just let me finally lose, so I accept it sooner that I will be in his debt forever.  

Luckily he picks up his speed once I clasp my legs around his face, resting my heels on his hard shoulders. 

“So perfect for me”, he chuffs and every little insecurities in felt before melted right away at his words.

I won’t tell him I’m close, I just want to cum without him dragging it out over and over again. 

And he will if he knows. 

Yet, I’m not good at keeping my closeness hidden as I grind absolutely feral and needy against his tongue, shifting my hips hastily up and down. Just chasing my own peak, not caring for a second what Satoru thinks, oddly enough.

But I forgot he has done this rodeo more than enough to read a woman's body. Right as I can almost taste the pinnacle of my orgasm, he stops and bites harsh on my inner thigh. I jerk up, completely out of breath and mad. 

Oh, so mad. 

Before I have the chance to throw ruthless cusses at him, he softly kisses the spot and pushes my legs off him, tossing me downright to the side. He stands up towering over my frame on the bed. 

“What are you doing?”, I ask with teary eyes in between rapid breaths.  

“Did you forget? We are a team now and for our first play I want us to cum together.”

Still I don’t know how he knows exactly where which part of my body is, but he grab my jaw harshly and snickers: “I know how fucking much you love a fair game.”

His thick thumb presses against my lips and I let it in. A mistake. He pushes it down my tongue, trying to gag me by moving it more and more down my throat. First I can handle it, sucking on it. But Satoru is never satisfied, he always seems to take it to the extreme as he holds my throat with other hand in place, lightly choking me from the outside too. I bite down on it as I can’t take it anymore, finally being able to breathe again as I gasp for air. 

“If you ever do this when my cock is in it, you will regret it.”

Spit is traveling down my chin as I look up at him. His face is turned to mine and if he didn’t have the blindfold on his agonizing eyes would look right at me. 

“Want to give it a try?”, I counter in a challenging way and instantly hate myself for it. Satoru is unpredictable and I’m not in the state to deal with his dick down my throat when he is sullen. 

After a few long, gnawing seconds he smirks at me and I allow myself to fill my lungs with air again. 

“Another time gladly”, he just announces before stepping back and gripping the rim of his pants. Satoru hasn’t even seen my naked body, but I can see the rock hard outline on the fabric. I gulp.

“But for today I have already told you my plan.”

His pants are down and he’s not wearing boxers. I knew it from the almost sex in my car that he is huge, but seeing his cock so close in front of my very sight, I whiz down the bed. Satoru notices instantly and grabs my ankle. 

“Satoru, I will die”, I share my unfiltered thoughts with him. I know confessing this will feed his ego well, but I don’t care. 

“No one has ever died”, he wipes over his mouth, which glistens with my juice and uses it to pump his colossal cock with his other hand a few times and adds with a wide grin: “so far.”

It is way longer than the average, even with both my hands I wouldn’t be able to completely cover it. The head is soft pink which sticks out against his pale skin and is already dripping precum. His girth is massive and overall slightly curved to the left. Mother nature really has her favorites and she decided to bless Satoru more than everyone I have ever encountered. 

“Not funny”, I murmur with a dry mouth as he pulls me towards him again, leaning over me. 

“I thought you like challenges.”

“I’m serious.”, and I’m being serious.

He sighs as he slowly reaches out to my face and collects the drool I choked out before. Holding out his flat palm to me, he doesn’t even need to say a word for me to know what he wants me to do. I still hesitate. 

“Never took you as a quitter”, oh, this fucking asshole. 

He knows exactly how to rile me up.

I spit in his hand, drawing a little smile out of his focused face as he coats his length with it. 

With his range I will need all the help I can get, even when my pussy is right now more wet than she ever was. 

Casually he leans on top of me, upholds his own weight with his left arm, so he doesn’t crush me as his right hand aligns the tip of his cock with my hole. I stop squirming and let him gradually insert his tip in. I whine into his shoulder, biting down on his neck as my hands claw into his back. He gasps heavily and shows mercy by giving me a few seconds to accommodate the sensation. 

The only fucking plot twist is, I never truly accommodate to it. It feels like he is splitting me open, leaving me raw and wounded. Once he starts to roll his hips, I see stars and cry into the crook of his neck.

“Psht, my angel, trust me, it will be fine”, he holds my head in his large hand, wiping a tear off my cheek: “I was made for you and you were made for me.”

I can’t even register his lovely words as all my cells are entirely focused on his dick entering me. 

He stops the movement of his hips for a second to kiss my temple, before slowly starting to move again after I adjusted myself a bit. I feel more than full, ready to break into two. He is stretching me completely out. 

After what felt like forever, he is fully tucked in. At this intensity all I’m able to do is keep my mouth open and try to breathe so I’m not fainting. He was right, he can fuck the insecurity out of me, because my brain is not able to think in this state. Every cell is targeting what Satoru is doing to me. 

Gently he takes my hand and guides it down from my chest to my abdomen, letting me palm his bulge inside of me. I can sense it twitching and pulsating inside of me. I whimper.

“See, you didn’t die”, he tries to joke. I would like to think that he does this to smoothen my angst, but he probably means it in a tantalizing way. 

“Ready?”, he asks and the rational part of me screams No! but I want to, no, I need him to move. 

“Mhm”, I weep and wrap my legs around his waist, ready to let him in even deeper. 

“Good”, he quickly purrs and I should have known that he won’t hold back. Slipping out of me, he barges into me again in a rough and provoking manner. Completely out and back completely in. My entire body feels equally nothing and everything all at once. I’m wholly at his mercy as he picks up the speed, pulling one of my legs up his chest unto his shoulder to penetrate me even further. Babbling his name and incoherent words all together, he puts his hand over my mouth to keep me quiet. I sink my teeth into his palm and grab the sheets, hoping my body will get used to it, but it never does. Unable to form a thought, just getting dumbfucked for what felt like hours.

Satoru doesn’t seem to be out of breath, while I get brain fog and grasp that not even my training for the Olympics made me feel this exhausted. 

But I don’t want this to stop, it’s painfully good and he hits the right stop each time, bringing me closer and closer but I try my best to suppress the coil forming in my insides that wants to finally be released. He wants us to cum together and he’s not there yet. My hands wander from his back to his chest under his compressed shirt, that clings even more to his body now with all the sweat and heat coating it. Once I touch his chest to caress his solid muscles and he starts to groan gravely into my ear, I can’t take it any more.

“Please, I can’t ‘ake it no more”, I sob: “Allow me to cum, please.”

He only chuckles intensely at my statement, letting his lower body crush more into mine as I feel the waves of mocking laughter.

“I said together”, he is stern again, making it clear that there is no way around. Right now I want to please him more than anything in this world, so I listen and be good.  

Picking up his pace again, I notice his thrusts getting sloppier, his groans becoming lower and sharper. 

“Now, angel. For me”, and I do as he says as he dives into me one last time, painting my walls with his warm cum. My eyes roll back into my head as I come undone. After a few seconds of breathing heavily with closed eyes I open them again and see him staring at me. 

No blindfold. 

How could I ever find those eyes scary?

“So beautiful”, at first I thought I said it outloud, but these are Satorus words.  

I push his sweaty hair back and kiss him. For what we just did, this kiss feels way too innocent, but it is the ideal ending. Shyly letting my fingers linger against his jaw, he kisses me a second time with more force but still nothing compared to the dirty kisses we shared in my car. Resting his forehead against mine, he pants lightly before giving me his usual wide flirtatious smile.

“Did it work?”

I still lie under his huge body, mouth slightly open and my mind too blown to register what he wants from me. 

I just let out a confused noise, which scored me one of his lighthearted grunts. He strokes his nose alongside mine, not breaking eye contact.

“Fucking your insecurities away?”

“Obviously”, I whisper, his eyes being the only things in my field of view. He hovers himself up and glides out of me, making me miss him immediately. 

I watch him putting his pants back on as I just lie there, unable to move. For a minute I am sure he broke something in me because I can’t maneuver my limbs. 

“No need to thank me”, he discloses with a wide smirk as he pulls my panties up and my skirt down to cover me. I’m actually glad that he isn’t cleaning me up or inviting me to take a bath in his room. I will do this on my own. The kisses were already on the edge of being too romantic. Can’t risk more.

“I wasn’t planning to”, I snap back, becoming defensive again as I lift myself up, feeling the soreness in my legs and core. As I manage to stand up with wobbly legs, Satoru watches me with a fat grin. 

“Will you be able to be on the ice tomorrow for the photos?” 

I glared daggers at him for this mischievous tone. 

“I had tougher challenges.”

“I should have really filmed this, just so I could repeat the part where you sobbed because you thought my dick would kill you.”

Asshole.

I show him my middle finger and step past him, concentrating on keeping my steps steady. I walk to the door and turn one last time around, seeing him leaning against a wall with his arms crossed. 

“This was a one time thing”, I declare, but not really believing myself either once I uttered it.

“Sure”, he replies with his mouth twitching slightly upwards. I know he is holding a simper back. 

“I’m serious.”

“And I said sure.”

I roll my eyes and open the door.

“No word to anyone”, I demand and slam the door behind me way too loudly for the time of the day. 

I hush down the stairs and stroll as fast as my aching legs allow me to home. His cum is already leaking out of me as I step under the shower. I regretted not fucking him in my car and now I wish I could say the regret I felt wasn’t worth it. I should regret sleeping with him, but I don’t. 

It was as good as winning feels like, at certain times even better. 

But I was right. It has to be a one time thing. He already cracked my body open, no need for him to get closer by doing the same to my mind. 

I let him in today. Not just in me, I mean my inner thoughts. I laid my self-doubts out like an open book while he still hasn’t shown me a bit of a vulnerable side. 

He gained the lead this night, but I’m on his heels. A second time I won’t let myself be so frail and delicate in front of him.

Never again.

The next day I wake up with throbbing legs and a raw feeling in my bottom line. I swallow two ibuprofen pills and wait for them to hit, so I can at least attempt to put my stockings on. I opt for a light grey set. No skirt, a leggings this time. I won’t be able to stand his teasing today. 

I arrive at the rink on time. Suguru is talking with Shoko as I step past them on the tribune. I wave them hello and they both smile at me before falling back into their conversation. I fall heavy on a seat and begin to loosen the ties of my skates, so I can get them on. The painkillers help but everything still feels tender and bruised. Satoru is on the ice already with Mei Mei. Once he notices me, he glides over the ice towards the tribune, ignoring Mei Meis fierce instructions. With his signature smile he walks over to me. 

“Hi”, he says before looking me up and down.

“Hi”, I mumble back, able to look into his eyes. 

“No skirt?”

“No skirt.”

“Why?”

“I don’t want a certain person to enjoy himself too much.”

He snickers and takes my skates out of my hands. 

“Can you walk?”

“No, I flew here”, I roll my eyes: “Of course I can.” barely

“Feisty today”, he catches my legs and gently guides my foot into the skates. He is so enamored in his actions that he doesn’t notice me gloom over his sudden affectionate side.   

“How are you?”, I ask him to break the silence as he ties my skate. He quickly looks up at me and tilts his head like he would have never imagined me asking him such a question.

“Good, but I’m pretty sure Mei Mei is actively trying to kill me with this training”, his hair is already sticky again from all the sweat and his pale cheeks are rosy. 

God, is he beautiful. 

I shake myself in disbelief after that thought. 

“But thanks to a certain person the pain in my leg is bearable”, he grins down as he slips me on my second skate.

“So, you and the certain person are even?”

He huffs and looks up at me after tying my second skate. 

“Not at all, I still expect a ‘thank you’ card and chocolates.” 

“Idiot”, I snarl, but end up smiling. He still kneels in front of me like he did yesterday, but this time it feels lighter, better. Like we made a huge step into the right direction for our deal to work. 

“By the way, you did great yesterday, partner”, he slaps my leg a couple of times.

I give him a dirty look and complain instantly: “You are so corny, it is unbelievable.”

Before he can counter something, probably something even more corny, Suguru shouts from a few feet away: “I got the photo!”

We turn our heads confused at his direction as he walks over to us with his phone. He shows us a picture he just took from us. Satoru with his hand on my lower leg, grinning up at me and me smiling down at him. 

A real smile. Filled with affection. 

“I like it”, Satoru states, getting back on his legs. Both men are now looking at me for approval. I nod, rambling: “it’s really good”, before Mei Mei screams at Satoru to go back on the ice and Suguru tells me he will send me the picture. I just nod again, ignoring what happens around me.

“Hey, are you alright?”, Suguru asks me this question way too often and whenever he does, I am never alright. 

The way I smiled at Satoru in this picture. 

Ayo I’m fucked. 

[zot3-flopped]

I gather some larries/PR idiots (I think led by stylesunchained?) are claiming that TR isn’t relevant enough to be mentioned and journalists aren’t writing about her/them as a result… So, they claim it’s a PR relationship but simultaneously that TR is “not relevant enough” to write about? How do they explain Harry and TR still being together if neither of them is gaining anything from this PR relationship, since they argue that the “beard” agrees to “stunts” in exchange for fame/relevance?

Multiple journalists have said that photos of celebs with their boyfriends/girlfriends sell much better than ones of the celeb alone, and that applies even if the partner isn't a celeb.

Stylesunchained the 'journalist' has worms for brains. She thinks that this photo was taken by a pap called by Harry and Harry posed for the shot, but the pap deliberately cut off Taylor. It was clearly just taken by some random creeping round the sunbeds and their view was partly blocked by a pillar.

[niamflopped]

King & Queen of exquisite profiles.

[bumble66]

Not to discredit your post, but I stopped believing rumors years ago when my fave got accused and rumored of all sorts of things he's done and it turned out none of those rumors were real and they were made by people who wanted nothing but views no wonder they went viral, or they simply hated him. Ultimately, I strongly believe Chris and AB are PR and I'm sure and certain that he will get smth important from it or a good paycheck OR they just wanted that woman name out, rather than he's doing to "cover his sexual orientation" we know nothing about celebs actually and why they do what they do, so I wouldn' t assume. I'm not against lgbtq don't get me wrong. It's PR that's for sure, but we don't know why and assuming will only generate useless buzz.

Yes, he could be straight but I heard that most male A listers are gay and bi because they have to use the casting couch. No real het dude would do such a thing for A list roles. There is also this quora answers summary of him someone made when asked if he were gay. Add to that that being gay runs in families and he already has a gay brother! But it is also a possibility that he is just a guy who wants to stay single but his PR hag told him that being single for too long will reignite old gay rumors. So Hollywood is a homophobic place either way cause they have the money and resources to push him as an openly bi or gay man (if he were one) but they rather put him in this netflix PR relationship (According to Edwin Jusino). I still believe in those lgbt rumors though because decades ago the gay men of datalounge uncovered all the gay stars that are out and proud these days. There is also research of "gay voice" and when Chris mentioned he is laser focused, his voice became so high pitched and when someone mentioned the barbie movie, he said "my brother's in it" in a mysterious gay voice too. I think it's cute. That's why I love and support him to get out of this mess. I hope more people wake up and stop PR relationships altogether #Gaylor.

[cardboardheartss]

My Overall Thoughts and Opinions on Min Hee Jin vs HYBE Situation

D.I.S.C.L.A.I.M.E.R I AM NOT SIDING WITH ANY PARTY IN THIS SITUATION! JUST SHARING THOUGHTS!!

It’s been a rough week for bunnies! Tokkiville has been getting invaded and ravished by so many people!

Firstly, I would like to begin with sharing my outmost remorse to the nwjns girlies! No member of they group has to be treated this way by BOTH parties. I know they currently stressed out but I really hope they know that they will be okay. Yes, there will be tons of changes in all aspects of their career but they have no choice thanks to the slave contract they signed with HYBE. See all the information MHJ put out about the girls not debuting pisses me off the most… imagine, your daughters left home to go train for god knows how long for their dreams having a 100% chance of just being crushed, even I as a CEO and parents would angered by this. Im unsure if the members had already known this but if not, imagine how they feel right now?

Secondly, Min Hee Jin, for her, she has her problems… i mean you did see the two tarot readings and Astro chart observations lol. Seeing people getting made at her bring ILL’IT into this situation makes no sense, do you not want someone who has obviously been copied to not call out the situation?! She’s not saying it’s the girls fault, she’s calling out the managers and directors for lacking creativity and uniqueness. Literally all of ADOR’s staff were mad pissed, I mean i would be too. Look even nwjns members said the same thing here. Once again, Min Hee Jin HAS her problems but right now she is fighting with the literal devil, one of thee richest businessman in Korea. She no longer wanted to be in HYBE and obviously with her capitalist tendencies, she wanted to take over HYBE too! Min Hee Jin is not wrong for not wanting to share her ideas with company because they’re obviously using her for their own benefits… SHE HAS THE RIGHT TO DISAGREE AND FIGHT FOR HERSELF, HER COMPANY ANDD MOST IMPORTANTLY THE NEWJEANS MEMBERS.

even Min Hee Jin said herself that she’s just a regular person who graduated from an art school and now she’s going head for head with Bang Si Hyuk? She truly has the guts and I applaud her for that.

Thirdly, kpop stans. Once again I just want everyone to shut their mouths and started practice their vocab because these people can not read. Why would you bring in groups that weren’t even supposed to be involved in the first place? Like just log off man.

Lastly, Bang Si Hyuk, this one hag. All I have to say about this hypocrite is that he’s weird. Imagine shading a whole ass group and telling Min Hee Jin she’s “enjoying it a little too much.” That fuckhead, I’m telling you congratulating a group under your company is not that much of a big deal. Him not wanting other companies branching out of hybe instead wanting all of them to be under HIS name and labels?!?! I don’t want to share more thoughts because i genuinely hate this hag and I am looking forward to more dirt on him coming out.

Also… why would Bang Si Hyuk allow a whole ass Pro-Israelist under his company andd GEFFEN too, a whole ass known pedophile and sex trafficker?! You can see all the controversies and articles about their actions and how people dislike them but you’re over hear taking down Min Hee Jin for what fucking reason?! Make it, make fucking sense man!!

People asking why she’s crying/swearing?! Are you being fr… once again I understand it’s all her mess too but personally I would be crying if I knew the amount of money I’d be losing, my hard work being copied, and losing the only group I worked so hard for to create. People complaining about nwjns members comforting Min Hee Jin… unless you’re Minji, what do you want the rest of the members to do… celebrate, throw a party, dance and be joyful over losing the one person who helped make them who they are today?

Their music, choreographies, PR management, events, album covers and just overall everything that nwjns identifies with being associated with Min Hee Jin being thrown away like it’s nothing? I would comfort that person too because why not and I understand where the worry from these girls comes from…

imagine you’re all unique and different from the rest of the industry then all of a sudden you wake up one day and now you’re going to be like the rest of the industry with the recycled concepts, terrible mediocre lyrics that have NOOOO correlation to the concept and being forced to have those “high notes.” I would be crying myself to sleep too.

I know Min Hee Jin said this issue is not rooted in misogyny, I need her to wake tf upppp! Imagine a whole ass middle aged/ boomer KOREAN man seeing YOU, a creative and hardworking FEMALE CEO debuting a group of young FEMALES that is excelling soooo well domestically and internationally. Getting daesungs, stream after stream, compliments, praise love and support world wide.

It’s pretty obvious where it’s all rooted from but it’s fine, one day the truth will eventually come to light 😌🤲🏽!

it’s already come to light, so I just need people to wakeeeee uppppppppppp!!!!!!!

Anyways! Live, laugh, love NEWJEANS 🐰✨

[karriethemechtech]

Awesome AWS-9Q (DeLacey)

Mass: 80 tons Chassis: Technicron Type G Power Plant: Pitban 240 Cruising Speed: 32.4 kph Maximum Speed: 54 kph Jump Jets: None      Jump Capacity: 0 meters Armor: Durallex Heavy Special Armament:      3 ER PPC (C)      1 HAG/20 Manufacturer: Lüneburg Vehicle Corporation,Irian BattleMechs Unlimited,Technicron Manufacturing      Primary Factory: Braunschweig,Irian,Savannah Communication System: Garrett T19-G Targeting & Tracking System: Dynatec 2780 Introduction Year: 3150 Tech Rating/Availability: F/X-X-X-E Cost: 8,083,800 C-bills

Overview The Awesome was designed in 2665 for the Star League by the Technicron Conglomorate and was based on the aging STR-2C Striker. While not as fast as its forefather, the Awesome is a strong assault 'Mech.

Capabilities The Awesome's abilities are nearly entirely dependent on its particle projection cannons. The AWS can withstand a severe and consistent onslaught from its weaponry thanks to several heat sinks. With one and a half tons more armor than the Striker, the AWS is more protected than even the BattleMaster. The Amazing, like any other BattleMech, has weaknesses. While it is lethal at range, it is less effective in close-quarters combat since its PPCs have a tougher time connecting with the victim. In that case, it just possesses a light weapon and a left fist to fall back on. Because of its limited mobility, it is vulnerable to flanking attacks from speedier opponents seeking to get past the PPCs. While they face arguably of the heaviest rear armor found on any BattleMech, the Awesome's lack of rear facing armaments or a weapon mount on its left arm has offered numerous MechWarriors a fighting chance. Formations of Awesomes (or even just a few) are incredibly effective and tough to stop or defeat when correctly placed by commanders who are knowledgeable of the AWS's limitations.

Deployment A basic upgrade to the original 8Q introduced in 3057, the heat sinks are upgraded to double heat sinks and are reduced to nineteen. The saved weight is used to add a fourth PPC to the 'Mech as well as a Guardian ECM Suite. Although there was some criticism for using basic PPCs and not upgrading to ER models, the 9Q proved itself during Operation Guerrero to be quite devastating. This clan salvage refit by Kerrie DeLacey swaps the left arm-mounted PPC for a Type 0 HAG/20 and two tons of ammunition, the other PPCs for Type DDS "Kingston" cERPPCs, and removes the small laser and ECM. To make room for the increased payload size, the heat sinks have been exchanged for their Clan equivalents.

History Awesomes can be found in every military House. Because the Free Worlds League has the last remaining manufacturing factories capable of generating the Awesome, it also has the most Awesomes of any of the Great Houses. Opinions on the 'Mech vary greatly within the League. Many people laud its powers, while others believe that its limited mobility is too high a price to pay for what it can do. Similar sentiments exist in the other Houses, but none of them can debate the issue beyond academics. Few commanders would turn down the opportunity to acquire an Awesome for their army. The Awesome is typically used to assault a fixed position or to breach the enemy's line of defense. They are also in demand for defensive operations. MechWarriors piloting the Awesome can expect to be involved in heavy battle and to be charged with obtaining or guarding the most crucial objectives from the adversary.

Notable MechWarriors Karrie DeLacey: A former MechTech of the Magistracy Armed Forces, Karrie fell into the mercenary life once she found that the skills she learned on the battlefield weren't as applicable in the civilian sector. After a disastrous first and only deployment with the now-extinct Dark Wolves Mercenary Company, she founded a mercenary company of her own: DeLacey's Last Resort. Extremely proud and boastful, Karrie drew up the plans for her custom Awesome as part of an argument on the proper battlefield role such a mech should have. The design trades pure firepower and heat management for greater single-point impact and a greater ability to brawl, "like something that big ought to be able to." While unconventional, it has served her well on the battlefields of the Last Resort's ugliest deployments. Still a proud Canopian citizen, Karrie pays each year to receive dossiers on elections back home, sending her ballot via the HPG network. While exceptions for the mandatory elections are made for citizens traveling abroad, she claims it "just wouldn't sit right not to."

Type: Awesome Technology Base: Mixed (Standard) Tonnage: 80 Battle Value: 2,517 Equipment Mass Internal Structure 8 Engine 240 Fusion 11.5      Walking MP: 3      Running MP: 5      Jumping MP: 0 Double Heat Sink: 19 [38] 9 Gyro: 3 Cockpit: 3 Weapons and Ammo Hyper-Assault Gauss Rifle/20 Ammo (12) CT 2 2 ER PPC RT 2 6 3 Double Heat Sink RT 6 3 HAG/20 LA 6 10 Double Heat Sink LA 2 1 ER PPC LT 2 6 4 Double Heat Sink LT 8 4 ER PPC RA 2 6 2 Double Heat Sink RA 4 2

Features the following design quirks: Battle Fists (LA)

[ingravinoveritas]

Hi!! Neil Gaiman just answered my question if Anna and Georgia are in GO and the answer is NO. Anna was pregnant and Georgia was offered a part but turned it down for….. reasons? Unknown to us other than that she believed the part should go to someone older and more experienced? Wonder what part she’s been offered and what her character could’ve been. Also, if there was a hypothetical season 3 we have to be worried if they’ll be cast in it now. Cause he said that they’ll definitely get a part somewhere in the show

Wow, okay...my inbox has been blowing up since Neil's post earlier. Well, for those who haven't gotten to see it, @yami-no-kokoro helpfully posted a screencap above, and it seems that Georgia and Anna will not be appearing in GO season 2...but I'm not entirely sure I buy the explanations as to why.

The first thing that struck me was that Neil actually answered this question at all, instead of "wait and see"-ing it as he has done with seemingly every other GO 2-related question. I also noticed that Neil specifically mentioned that Georgia was offered a part, but AL was not. I'm sure there was a reason for it being phrased that way, but had AL been offered a part, it would've been very easy and made sense to say that there.

As for the explanation of her being pregnant and avoiding people because of Covid, we know and have evidence that this is not really true, as AL was in Scotland during filming with Lyra, and was photographed in a restaurant in Glasgow eating with Michael and Jon Hamm. Also, Michael was on set every day with countless people and then with her, so anything he would've been exposed to, she would have been as well. Logically, then, it seems like she was not taking stringent precautions against Covid, because had that been the case, she would have stayed in Wales instead of following Michael to Scotland for six months for a film shoot while pregnant during a pandemic. So to me, that makes Neil's response seem like a PR one, for the sake of glossing over the fact that AL was not offered a part.

In terms of Georgia...again, the explanation given is a curious one. My feeling is that Neil was softening up the truth, which I am guessing is that Georgia was offered the part, looked it up online, found out the person she was asked to play was older than her, got pissed off, and declined the offer. As you said, Anon #1, there don't seem to be many reasons that Georgia would turn down a role or any opportunity to further her career, so had the part been a more glamorous or attention-grabbing one, she probably would have accepted it without hesitation. I do not at all buy for a second that this had anything to do with Georgia pushing for "age appropriate" casting, except in the sense of "I'm too young to play this part and how dare you even ask, go cast some old hag instead." But again, that translated into another PR response (and a nicely finessed one, which is not at all surprising since Neil is a talented writer) that does indeed reflect well on Georgia.

I know tonight was the BAFTAs, so I'll just touch on that briefly, but Anon #2, it seems that Georgia was there at the event, but just not on the red carpet:

Right away, I have to say I'm confused by "I find it all too much" and am not even sure what that means. Earlier in the day, Georgia posted a picture of herself breastfeeding Birdie and hashtagged it #mybaftalook, but it didn't seem to get a lot of traction, as all I saw on Twitter and elsewhere was pictures of David (and Catherine, and Billie) at the BAFTAs. So I don't really know what was going on here, but her entire vibe today just seemed so weird overall. Why would she not want a picture with David on the red carpet? Was she not invited to walk the red carpet? I don't think we'll ever know for sure, but putting out the narrative of "I find it all too much" just seems disingenuous, especially since she was on the red carpet with David only recently at the Olivier Awards. (EDIT: What I wrote here was based on a misinterpretation of Georgia's post that was very different to how other people read it. I have attempted to clarify my thoughts here.)

Going back to GO 2, though, I did see some of the comments that you mentioned, Anon #3, and I find it interesting that people want to categorize specific blogs as "haters" or "anti-Georgia/Anna" when a) More often than not, it seems like I end up saying out loud what others are thinking, but by no means am I the only one thinking it--especially if the results of the recent poll about GT/AL being in season 2 are any indication; and b) I do not categorize myself as anti-Georgia/Anna, but rather anti-the mentality that they are somehow above reproach or criticism simply because of who their partners are.

I have never and will never tell anyone that they shouldn't like Georgia or Anna. If you are a fan of theirs, then by all means, be a fan. Nobody is all bad (or all good, for that matter), and if you like them, that is completely your prerogative, and go ahead and have a gay old time. But I will not be quiet about the things I've seen from Georgia and AL that discomfit me, nor put up with a narrative that I feel is phony. And I think that right there is the nuance that seems to be getting missed--that what I have a problem with and dislike is Georgia and AL's actions/things they've said, rather than just them as people. I think if folks looked at it that way, it might also help them view Georgia and AL as their own person instead of "David's wife"/"Michael's girlfriend" and would enable us to better have these discussions.

If what Neil said is, in fact, true, I do feel relieved to know that Georgia and AL are not in GO 2. To me, GO is something incredibly special, and Georgia and AL just do not "fit" in that world, and them being in the show would have had a detrimental effect on the illusion/magic of the GO universe. I think the analogy that best explains this is Mary Martin as Peter Pan on TV in the 1950s. In the scene where Peter flies, the actor is put in a harness/on wires to give the appearance of flight. It's the illusion that enthralls us, that immerses us in that sense of magic, and in that moment--even just briefly--you don't see the wires and start to believe that human beings can fly. Season 1 of GO and the incredible chemistry between Michael and David created that same sense of magic and wonder in so many of us....but having Georgia and AL in it would be like seeing the wires.

As for a possible season 3, there's about a thousand different factors that will determine if there even is a season 3, let alone if Neil will cast them or even have parts for them to play. We saw how long it took between seasons 1 and 2 of GO (though Covid was obviously a large part of that), but if that is any indication of how long it could be until season 3, a lot of things can change in a few years' time, so who knows what will happen.

So, those are my thoughts on today's developments (and of course this had to happen on Mother's Day, of all days). Hopefully we'll have more GO 2 stuff to talk about in the coming weeks...