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#preparing for season 3 of bridgerton
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Does Penelope deserve her happily ever after with Colin in season 3?
A look into the first two seasons as well as contemplating the third.
As controversial of a topic this is I find myself at a loss preparing for the new season of Bridgerton. It is no secret this season will be the one where Penelope finally breaks out of the mold of “the girl in yellow” and has her comeback as the season’s hidden gem. After what she had overheard Colin saying behind her back many fans have been rooting for her to prove to the ton that she is no simple wallflower.
I however find myself wondering if Penelope even deserves her happily ever after. Perhaps the director had made an error in rushing Penelope and Colin into the spot light and Benedict should have had his chance to shine with the reveal of his other half. By doing so it would have given Penelope the chance to prove how much she has changed from the past two seasons making her romance much more sweeter in season 4.
When we look back when we first meet Penelope she is a sweet girl in love with her best friend’s brother. But that sweetness turn sour as the season progresses. I still have not forgotten what she had done to Marina. While it can be argued Penelope was doing it because she loved Colin and wanted to protect him she chose the most nuclear option because she felt she had no choice. This is one that wasn’t even present in the book series and makes things much more tragic for Marina if Bridgerton continue and shows us Eloise’s happily ever after.
But with this addition comes with the consequence of changing Penelope from a shy girl harassed by those around her and trapped in yellow by her mother who writes a gossip paper to have her own voice to fight back into something much darker. While it can be argued Marina brought her situation onto herself she was a young girl who was in love and manipulated into believing she was alone by Mrs. Featherington. What I find makes it more tragic is that Colin would have married her regardless if Marina had told him what had happened to her instead of finding out through Lady Whistledown. And for those who read the books we know what awaits poor Marina after her mental health takes a turn for the worse unless the director’s change that as well.
The next and still ongoing feud is her massive fight with Eloise when she found out Penelope is Lady Whistledown. One that will carry on into season 3 and with good reason. Penelope’s choice to keep her identity as Lady Whistledown had to be her greatest and worst decision.
While Eloise is known for being very outspoken it has often come back to bite her. During her hunt for the author she had pestered everyone she knew and accidentally caught the attention of the queen who gives her the task of unmasking the author (a ridiculous thing to ask a child). This is something that could have been prevented if Penelope had told her but the secrets that are published are the most scandalous and eye catching with no one spared from her quill (even the queen). If she were to know this it could place her in even more danger or make their friendship more strained than it is currently.
The sad part is that Eloise in the books never found out this way. There was no betrayal between them and she thought her best friend being the author was wonderful.
However, Penelope’s paper in the show has been proved to change the opinion of even the highest of ranking officials. One she may not comprehend how powerful that is. She had already proven how vengeful she can be when someone tries to steal the man she loves through dishonorable means. Even if it means throwing Eloise under the bus to prevent her identity being know. Something we all see backfire when Eloise discovers her secret.
Yet as much as people point out how childish Eloise is and how she doesn’t understand how the world works the problem is Eloise has never been given the chance to understand. And she points out how much she wants to learn.
Yet in the span of two seasons she had nearly been put in danger by the Queen’s demand, watched her best friend become a different person, and learned that same best friend betrayed her and was secretly the author she had been searching for who nearly destroyed her life to save her own. Penelope has been just as childish but more spiteful yet hardly anyone ever points that out. At the end of the day both girls are barely in their twenties with no real knowledge of the world beyond what they have been raised to believe and what they have seen.
If Penelope wants to prove she is the right woman for Colin she will have to show herself to be more mature than she had been in the past two seasons. Eloise will certainly not allow this version on Penelope near her brother if she has anything to say about it. And if the rest of the family knew what she had done I have no doubt they wouldn’t as well. Penelope has a long road ahead of her if she plans to redeem herself beyond a simple wardrobe change.
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Whoever owns the Bridgerton: Official Playlist playlist on Spotify is making me so excited (also nervous) because what do you mean Unholy is going to be in the series 😭😭😭 most importantly, at what moment is it going to play (we know the answer to that one, although I can see both the carriage and the mirror scene being used)
but STILL
If Unholy is a background song to a sex scene, we know it's gonna be so hot and steamy that we might need to call the firefighters
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polin-erospsyche · 3 months
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So the spoilers …
Colin Bridgerton is really that man who’s fallen off his horse and has not got back up in over a decade, has declared he’ll stay down bad and is hell bent on catching up all the lost time huh? That man, king of love speeches apparently
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lovelyo · 4 months
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Penelope fans: Penelope saved Eloise from the Queen cause the Queen was gonna arrest her and crush her family over being LW!
Penelope fans: The Queen and LW have a banter type rivalry, she loves LW, it keeps her entertained. She wasn’t unforgiving towards Eloise, she just wanted her to do stuff for her using LW so it will make no sense if the Queen doesn’t pardon Penelope
…I don’t even gotta say it.
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mylifeisactuallyamess · 4 months
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Colin Bridgerton.
That’s it. That’s the post.
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persimminwrites · 3 months
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well i stayed up way past my bedtime to finish part 2 lol. not sure if it was worth it though..... i have many thoughts that i will stew on and maybe share later but ill just say that i was very underwhelmed :(
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freebooter4ever · 8 months
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Bridgerton rewatch won out over mr robo*t bc frankly when my life is falling apart, if choosing between romance fantasy vs depressive reality im probably gonna pick the fantasy. BUT. Somehow the first time i watched season one i must have missed this scene? I confess as many times as i rewatched season 2 i still kinda hated anthony bc i thought that he just casually tossed the singer girl aside without thought after promising to love her forever... And it turns out she dumped him??? And here i was thinking he was just another wealthy male character who throws his money around and uses women until he's bored, and that in season two kate was simply the First Woman Worth Changing For - you know, that trope where the asshole finally meets someone he values and suddenly changes. Which always sounds fake in stories to me, and i usually despise (why cant men treat all women with respect and dignity even the ones they dont want?). Except in kate's case she was just That Amazing that i ignored anthony's sudden change from asshole to romantic.
But yeah no apparently anthony has been a romantic the entire time, he just had his heart broken. ;_; sorry anthony
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pensmoon · 2 years
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Do You Ever Feel Like You're Being Watched?
Chapter 4: Brave Enough (Colin)
She has not acknowledged him yet, but he assumes that she feels his presence. They always do, never making it too far into a room without finding the other. It’s like a string ties them together, pulled taut on their wrists when they are in the same room, such that they cannot ignore it and must converse with the other before they are allowed to speak to anyone else. Not that it’s ever a chore. In fact, it is always the most memorable part of his night. Nay, his whole week.
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ladysharmaa · 4 months
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Kate mini version
Anthony Bridgerton x Kate Sharma x Sharma!sis
Summary: Y/n adapted to the Bridgerton family dynamic. However, she remains a little fearful and shy. Could the arrival of a prince change that?
part 1 part 2 part 3
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Ever since Kate and Anthony assured Y/n that they wanted her to live with them, things had gotten better. The girl felt more comfortable with them, and appreciated the effort the couple made to show that she was always welcome. Riding horses for the three of them was an almost regular activity now, and these afternoons were Y/n's favorite.
Anthony had given her a beautiful black mare, which she insisted on learning to wash and comb, even though there were servants for that purpose. The man then spent the rest of the month teaching her how to ride, and this was something that brought her very close to Anthony, who she now considered like a brother.
The truth was, living with her older sister and her husband was wonderful. There was never a dull moment and she always had someone to talk to. Furthermore, the relationship between her and Kate was the strongest, and they were more inseparable than ever. Y/n's mother had agreed that her daughter would stay at Viscount's house for a while and thus extended her stay in India.
However, even though she was comfortable in that smaller core, she still felt shy around Anthony's siblings. She loved them all, and they always treated her equally, but in the back of her head there was always that thought that she was intruding.
Now, the Bridgerton family plus Y/n were on their way to the park to have a picnic. The season was starting again and suitors from all over the world were arriving to try to find someone. On the way there, Y/n entertained herself by listening to Eloise's grumbling that she would be entering the season again, even if the last thing she wanted was to find a husband.
Bridgerton had made a point of giving Y/n her feminist speech, and despite the eye rolls she received from some of her siblings, Y/n agreed with everything she said. However, she always wanted to be married to a man who truly loved her, and that wasn't going to change.
It was a sunny day, perfect for staying right by the lake and enjoying the delicious food that the maids had prepared. Anthony and Kate were in their own world, whispering to each other with gigantic smiles, Benedict and Collin were appreciating the ladies passing by, and Eloise was reading her book while Violet had met Lady Danbury and the two were chatting animatedly. Daphne and Simon hadn't arrived with their son yet, but Y/n couldn't wait to play with the baby again.
Meanwhile, she, Hyacinth, Gregory and Francesca were walking around the lake, picking up rocks and seeing who could throw them the furthest. Probably not the most etiquette thing they could do, but Violet and Anthony hadn't stopped them yet so they continued.
"I'm starting to get tired." Y/n grumbled, rolling the shoulder of her arm that was starting to feel sore from throwing so many rocks. "I think I'll sit down and get some sun."
"We'll be right there and keep you company then. I just need to beat Gregory first!" Hyacinth promised.
Y/n smiled towards the three, then heading towards the lawn where the others were. She momentarily looked down, seeing that she had gotten a little dirty on her dress when she went up against someone. The force of the impact had been so great that she lost her balance and began to fall backwards. However, this never happened because someone managed to grab her arms and pull her up again.
When she opened her eyes, having closed them in preparation for the fall, she saw a young man, around her age, looking worriedly at her. "Are you alright? My apologies, Miss, I was distracted and didn't see you."
"I'm okay." she said a little breathlessly. Their proximity didn't help either. "I'm the one who apologizes. I should be looking ahead instead of at my dress."
"It is a beautiful dress." he said, taking the opportunity to look her up and down, letting a small smile form on his lips. Y/n's cheeks immediately started to turn pinker. "It's a pleasure to meet you, Miss…"
"Sharma." Y/n smiled. "I'm sorry, I don't recall who you are."
"Prince Charles, the youngest son of Queen Charlotte and King George." he chuckled when he saw Y/n's wide eyes, who quickly made a small bow. "Please, that's not necessary. On top of that, I was the one who almost made you fall to the ground."
"My apologies, Prince Charles. I returned from India only a few months ago and it seems that I still don't know everything I should know. This mistake will not be repeated."
"It wasn't anything serious. To be honest, I'm actually glad you didn't immediately know who I was. I went against you because I was running away from an Earl's daughters who were begging me to marry them." A silence fell over them. "Who are you here with?"
"My sister and her husband's family. Viscount Anthony Bridgerton and Viscountess Kate Bridgerton." Y/n looked over his shoulder, seeing Anthony staring in her direction, more specifically at the Prince. He was about to get up when Kate pulled him down again, sending Y/n a smile and a wink. "They're looking at us right now."
"Of course, I know who they are. My mother loved the love story between them. Since then, she has only told my older siblings that she wants them to have something like that too. But they are not very interested in getting married, much to the Queen's disappointment."
Y/n just let out a small chuckle in response, not really knowing what to say. The proximity to the prince was becoming increasingly intimidating, and it didn't help that the entire Bridgerton family had noticed that interaction and were now observing discreetly.
"I apologize, Prince Charles, but I must return to my sister's family. We came to take advantage of this beautiful day to have a picnic."
"Of course, Miss Sharma. I hope to see you again soon." he nodded with his hands clasped behind his back. With a smile, he went back on his way while Y/n walked over to where Kate and Anthony were, her cheeks painted a light pink.
"What were you talking about?" Anthony questioned without being able to control himself any longer, his half-closed eyes still focused on the back of the boy walking in the distance.
Kate rolled her eyes at Anthony's exaggerated protectiveness, but the truth is that her heart started to beat faster when she saw how Anthony had so much care and affection for Y/n. It made her imagine how protective he would be of their daughters.
"Don't pay attention to Anthony, Y/n. The prince seemed very interested in talking to you. You should have gone for a walk together."
"Sister!" the younger girl exclaimed with wide eyes, becoming even more embarrassed. "He was just apologizing for going against me."
"That boy, prince or not, should look where he is going! Irresponsible, that's what he is!" Anthony continued to mumble, ignoring the look his wife sent him.
"Well, I am delighted that you made a new friend, Y/n. Now come sit with us for a while and drink some water, it's very hot."
"You're getting worse than mother." Y/n rolled her eyes in amusement. She added with a wink, "I guess it's a good training for the future."
───── ⋆⋅☆⋅⋆ ─────
"I do not want to go." Y/n stated, crossing her arms defiantly.
"Sister, we've already had this conversation." Kate repeated for the thousandth time, but still with the same patience as the first time. The older woman sighed, looking understandingly at her sister who was looking at the floor with a pout. "What are you really afraid of? It's your first ball, it's normal for you to be nervous."
Y/n was going to be subject to the season for the first time, where she could meet her future husband. Despite all the nerves she felt, she was happy to have Kate, Anthony, and the rest of the Bridgerton family with her. Furthermore, she would be in the same situation as Francesca, except that the latter had been named diamond of the season.
"How's mother and Edwina?" Y/n tried to change the subject, instead asking about the two other Sharmas who were in Prussia. Edwina was pregnant with her first child with Prince Friedrich and Mary had gone there, after a brief stop in England, to support Edwina.
"Y/n, don't change the subject. You can talk to me."
"What if no one asks me to dance, Kate?" Y/n finally revealed her fears shyly. She spoke so quietly that Kate had to strain to understand her words, but when she did her eyebrows furrowed in sadness. "You and Anthony took me in, what if now no one asks me to dance and I make you look bad?"
"First of all, you could never make us look bad and we would never be disappointed in you. I even think Anthony's biggest dream would be if you and Francesca didn't dance with anyone." Kate chuckled knowing how protective her husband was. "And I don't want you to be forced to dance with anyone. You can say no if someone invites you to dance and you don't want to. And if anything happens, call Anthony or his brothers."
"I will." the girl nodded, seeing her sister's serious look. "I hope everything goes well."
"Of course it will! And you won't be alone, we'll all be there in case you need anything. And who knows, maybe you'll see a certain prince. I heard the queen is going to make him participate in this season."
Y/n didn't respond to the teasing, she just continued to get ready with the help of the maids. When Anthony called them from downstairs, the two sisters hurried to meet him, seeing that the rest of the family was already there with the exception of Francesca.
When they saw her, a big smile appeared on everyone's faces, Violet going to give her a hug as soon as she reached the end of the stairs and Daphne holding her hand. "You look beautiful."
"Thank you." she smiled at the women, and was later praised by Eloise, and the Bridgerton brothers.
Then, it was Francesca's turn to go down the stairs, catching their attention. After the compliments she received, the girl stood next to Y/n, the two holding hands as they walked to the carriages waiting for them.
"You look very beautiful, diamond of the season." Y/n said with a teasing smile, squeezing her hand in Francesca's in comfort.
"You do as well, Princess Sharma." Francesca giggled. To relieve the tension, the girl looked straight ahead at Anthony who was helping Kate into the carriage, his forehead dripping with sweat as he looked discreetly at the two teenagers. "I think my brother is going to pass out from how nervous he looks."
"Tonight promises to be quite interesting. At least he has my sister to control him a little, or I think he would be glaring at every suitor in the room, even if they didn't even want anything to do with us."
When they arrived at the Queen's castle, they were both amazed by the place. An orchestra played in the middle while some couples were already dancing, the space decorated with various details and chandeliers lighting up the room. When the Bridgerton family entered, everyone stopped to observe the diamond of the season, who was still clinging to Y/n.
To give her the focus of attention, Y/n tried to move away but Francesca just grabbed her hand tighter, sending her a look of fear. The Sharma girl nodded in understanding, then stood on Francesca's side, also being subjected to the curious looks of other people.
"Come on, girls." Anthony said, guiding the family to a corner while everyone analyzed the environment. He then turned to his two friends, who in his eyes were too young to be thinking about suitors, but he knew that this was the right age. "If you need anything, and I mean anything, go to one of us. We'll always be here to make sure you're okay. Now, all of you split up and socialize."
"They already look so nervous and you're going to scare them even more with your nerves." Benedict placed a hand on his older brother's shoulder. "Relax, brother. Go dance with your wife, we are also here to take care of them."
"I know." Anthony sighed, running a hand over his face. His tense muscles only relaxed when he felt Kate's hand caress his arm as she smiled understandingly. "Shall we dance, Viscountess Bridgerton?"
"We shall." she giggled, letting her husband guide her to the center of the room.
Meanwhile, Y/n watched the people at the ball nervously and curiously. They were all dressed to the nines, with the best fabrics and jewelry that showed the families' wealth and status. The Sharma smiled slightly when she noticed a girl being asked by a suitor. It was obvious that they were both nervous, but when he finally managed to ask the question, the girl blushed and accepted with a big smile.
Y/n sighed, turning her attention elsewhere. Her heart was beating heavily against her chest, wondering if she was going to experience the same situation as that girl.
A light touch on her shoulder made her snap out of her thoughts. Y/n turned to the side, her eyes widening when she saw Prince Charles standing there, both hands behind his back and a perfect smirk on his lips.
"Miss Sharma, what a pleasure to see you again."
"Prince Charles." she greeted, making a small bow. "This time I haven't forgotten my manners."
"I must say you look beautiful tonight." he praised, gently taking one of her delicate hands and bringing it to his lips, lightly kissing her skin. Y/n's cheeks immediately flushed, getting worse when she realized that they were attracting the attention of others. "Are you enjoying the ball?"
"Very much, thank you. The orchestra plays beautifully. It's lovely to see so many people dancing, especially my sister and Viscount Bridgerton. I have never seen them happier."
"Indeed. We could dance too… If you would like to, of course." Y/n didn't think she had ever seen the boy being shy, but she had to admit that it was really cute to see him like that.
"Are you sure? Many people are already looking at us… Including the Queen." she whispered the last part with a look of fear. "Are you supposed to find a lady to marry this year?"
"My mother hopes so, but she doesn't pressure me into anything. Right now, I just want to dance with you. Please? Don't pay attention to anyone else, just focus on me."
Y/n swallowed hard, but nodded, resting her hand on the arm Charles offered. The two walked to the dance floor as soon as the song ended, preparing for a new melody. The Sharma girl held her breath when she felt the boy's hand position itself on her waist, pulling her closer, while the other intertwined with hers.
The music started slowly and Y/n let the prince lead her, too nervous to even remember the choreography she had already practiced several times before. Out of the corner of her eye, she saw Kate and Anthony looking at them as they danced, giving nods of encouragement but still keeping their attention on them.
The rest of the people looked in shock, seeing the youngest son of the Queen and the King dancing with the sister of Viscountess Bridgerton who had caused a lot of talk last season. The Queen was also watching them, a small smile appearing on her lips.
"You're not just focusing on me." Charles hummed, squeezing her waist to show she was just joking. "And on top of that I'm a great dancer."
"My apologies. But I can't agree with the last part. I think —" but she couldn't finish her sentence as Charles picked her up and twirled her around several times until her laughter could be heard above the music.
"Sorry, what were you saying?" he laughed teasingly, loving the blush on her cheeks. He wanted to make her blush all the time, he loved the effect he had on the girl who was constantly on his mind since that day in the park.
"Prince Charles, this will certainly not be seen very well by other people. They are all whispering about us now! More than they already were."
"Call me Charles." He said, ignoring the rest of what Y/n said. His eyes were intense, studying the girl's face and stopping on her lips before moving up to her eyes.
"No."
"No?" he raised his eyebrows, as if he wasn't expecting that answer. Y/n stepped away from him, making a small bow. And only then did he realize that the song had already ended.
"I really enjoyed this dance, thank you. I hope to meet you again. We keep crossing paths so who knows?" she smiled, turning her back and walking towards Francesca who was alone in the corner, a drink in her hand.
Prince Charles definitely wanted to see Y/n Sharma again, his gaze following the girl's movements as if in a trance. Surely him standing in the middle of the dance floor looking at Y/n would be the main topic in the paper of Lady Whistledown.
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andmineisyellow · 3 months
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Season 3 really feels like the end of an era for the show. And I don't just mean that because Polin will be taking a step back next season. That's something I'm used to and prepared for with the show's leads. But there are so many other things that are going to change too. The Featheringtons won't be up to their shenanigans, which means the show's comedic tone will shift. There will be less Peneloise, and for the first time, Eloise and Queen Charlotte's plots won't revolve around Whisteldown. Season 4 will also be the first season where the opening scene isn't a Bridgerton's debut into society.
In a lot of ways, season 4 is going to feel like a whole new show. And I don't think that's a bad thing. Shows should be able to evolve and most of these elements will reach their natural conclusion. But it's also a bit scary not knowing what the future holds. We've been with many of these dynamics for so long. Polly Walker in particular has been such a force that I truly can't picture the show without Portia Featherington.
I'm looking forward to seeing what a new era will bring, but I'm also finding it hard to accept that we have to say goodbye to this one.
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maefansblog · 2 months
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Colin's Feelings for Penelope
Buckle up, because this is a long one.
Colin has always had feelings for Penelope. It did not just happen because of her glow up or because he was jealous. It also doesn't happen overnight. They are true friends who turn into lovers.
Feelings can start as admiration, protectiveness, care, friendship, pride, and turn into jealousy, lust, and love.
As he says in Season 2, "Our relationship has taken shape so naturally over the years, one could take it for granted," Colin tells Penelope. "You have always been so constant and loyal, Pen."
I've said this in another post, but Penelope's makeover revealed who she truly was, while Colin's makeover was to cover his insecurities. Colin fell in love with Penelope because she truly stepped into herself. As Lady Danbury said that all Penelope had to do was be herself.
When Colin apologizes in the garden in Season 3 Episode 1, it almost feels like a love confession.
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In Lessons, he encourages Penelope to be herself-even referencing how they first met!
Colin's relationship is so strong with Penelope that he remembers how he and Penelope first met. He even recalls it fondly, calling her charming.
Colin is constantly chasing after Penelope in Season 3!
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He is constantly touching her and wanting to get her alone.
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Colin has so many longing looks where he is pining for Penelope. I'll describe a few of them. In Season 1 Episode 8, when looks for Penelope across the ballroom and catches her gaze before going up to her. In Season 2, when Colin returns home, and the world stops when he catches Penelope’s eyes.
Like in Season 3, when Penelope leaves Colin when she says things changed. He has such a lost puppy dog look. Then, with Goodnight Mister Bridgerton, he is so disappointed in himself and longs for Penelope to return. He has a longing and jealous look when Penelope is talking to Lord Basilio and Lord Remington during the Full Moon Ball.
The longing at the sweets tent, after the balloon rescue, when Lord Debling dances with Penelope at the Innovation Ball, the mirror pine at the library, before and during the wedding dance, when Penelope wears her nightgown, at Francesca's wedding and before the big Declaration at the Butterfly Ball.
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Colin ALMOST confesses his feelings at the Willow Tree and before Penelope first danced with Lord Debling at the Innovation Ball. His words got jumbled and his nerves got the best of him. Normally, Colin prepares words before saying something important and he had no time to prepare.
Colin intended to confess his feelings when he went to the Queen's Ball (in Episode 4) and interrupted Penelope and Lord Debling's Dance.
I think Colin had rehearsed his speech a thousand times in his head. He probably imagined a thousand endings, (a few with his heart shattered, a few with them waiting years until they are together, a few with them courting, a few with them engaged, many wet dreams, a few with them married and having a family).
To Colin, if Penelope reciprocated his feelings, his idealized mind was that they were going to be together forever. I think he *tried to wait to propose,* in order to treat Penelope as she deserves.
When Colin cuts in the dance, he is not going to let anyone steal his girl. When Penelope left him on the dancefloor, he had already felt the sting of heartbreak. Yet when Penelope exited alone for her carriage, he began to hope again and could *not* let her leave without telling her. Chaos Colin definitely kicked in, and he was running on pure impulse.
He chases the carriage down with the sole purpose of confessing his feelings. He has no qualms with being alone with Penelope because he's been alone with Penelope before, and no one bats an eye.
Again, he's dreamed up a thousand endings. Colin saw his entire future realized, knowing that all of them ended happily ever after together.
We know Book Colin and Show Colin are separate people and separate stories.
However, a part of me thinks the show Colin kept the part of "I wouldn't have compromised someone without rendering a marriage proposal" stuck.
[Also, Book Colin doesn't start the day off thinking he was going to marry Penelope. He follows Penelope to the church, gets jealous that she might be meeting a Lover, is shocked that she is Lady Whistledown, they argue, he gets a little turned on, she states that she doesn't believe she's beautiful, then Colin declares she is. He knows he's going to marry her in that moment, compromises her, and then immediately proposes.]
I don't think Colin intended to propose. (Although I make jokes that he did! 🤣) He had imagined it. However, once she said she reciprocated his feelings, he was going to marry her. He had no control of his impulses. He was locking her in. He was going to propose.
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He kisses and compromises her with no thoughts but Penelope, Penelope, Penelope... like she is a siren. (Book reference.) His face looks like he's hypnotized and living out his wildest fantasies. This was Penelope, and this was love. (Another Book reference.) So when they arrive at Bridgerton house, he is firm that he loves Penelope, she has feelings for him (he doesn't know if she loves him yet), and they are going to be together forever. He has the look of "Yes that's my wife!"
When he exits the carriage, I think he had proposed so many times in his dreams that he forgot to actually say it out loud. He happily asks, " For God's sake, Penelope Featherington, Are you going to marry me or not?"
Then he locks in. Telling his mother, family... probably getting no sleep to get their new home set up. Colin is ready for forever with Penelope.
He publicly claims her.
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He reassures her on multiple occasions that he cares for her, has feelings, and even loves her.
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Colin tries to protect her the only way he knows how. He does this by helping her with Cousin Jack in Season 2, offering to help her find a husband at the beginning of the season, saving her from the hot air balloon accident, and even her mother's wrath.
He tries to protect her, but feels like he fails and makes things worse. Especially when he thinks she's been kidnapped, only to find out she's Lady Whistledown. When the Queen interrupts his wedding to try to capture Lady Whistledown, Colin wants her to give up, but she can't because Penelope is Lady Whistledown. He tries to solve things with Cressida, and Cressida increases the money for Blackmail. Although I made a joke in the next picture, it does show why Colin would be upset.
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Even when he is mad he loves her and wants to be married to her. He ravished her on the street and was giddy to dance with his bride on their wedding day!
Penelope has also changed the way he views intimacy.
From their first kiss, the world as he knew it shattered. Colin came to a realization that he had deeper feelings for Penelope than he had never thought to examine because they had been such close friends for such a long time. She completely opened his eyes.
The carriage kiss and more demonstrated the passion that can be expressed through combining emotional and physical intimacy.
The mirror scene was something that could never compare to anything else. It was definitely love making.
The modiste kiss was a confirmation that Penelope truly loved Colin. She wanted Colin to return to who he really was instead of the fake persona that he was putting on. With this news, Colin is filled with passion and an overflow of love for the person who sees him as he is and loves him all the same.
This is why to mix physical intimacy, while Colin was angry at the beginning of their marriage, feels wrong for Colin. He is tortured by this. He sleeps fitfully, but his love for Penelope has transformed him so much that he can't go back to his beginning persona and fake intimacy. He knows true intimacy and doesn't want to sully it.
He can't stay away from her, though. He won't give up Penelope. That's why he sleeps on the sofa that they first made love to be close to her rather than choose another room in the house.
Which makes Colin's Declaration of Love so great in the end. He doesn't take away Penelope’s chance to reveal Lady Whistledown. She is sharing with the world who she is. He doesn't try to change her. He has fallen even more in love with her because he knows even more about Penelope. Colin doesn't have to fake who he is or his feelings for Penelope because he knows that Penelope accepts and loves Colin for being himself.
Colin and Penelope's final intimacy scene shows them both coming together on equal levels, knowing each other fully, and loving them all the same. He is able to love and be loved. He is able to let Penelope take the reins in certain aspects of their relationship, and he is secure enough to let her. (The puns were just naturally there.)
So Colin has had true feelings for Penelope. Their relationship progressed so naturally. He was her friend. Eventually, they turn into lovers. This is why Colin Bridgerton is top tier. This is why this couple holds such a great spot in my heart. 💕
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Thanks for reading and diving into the mind of Colin Bridgerton! 💕
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maryleclerc · 21 days
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A SERIES: THE UNION OF HEARTS AND DUTIES
pairing: prince!charles leclerc x noble!reader
summary: as the diamond of the season, will lady y/n find a true match?
warning: english is not my first language, bridgerton theme, haven’t watch ss2-3 yet, took place in the 1920s era. not proofread/beta read yet
TUOHAD series
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CHAPTER 1: The Diamond of the Season
The night was alive with anticipation as I, Y/N Y/L/N, stood before the grand mirror in my room, my reflection framed by the soft glow of candlelight. It was an evening I had long dreamt of, one where I would step into the world as the Diamond of the season, the most sought-after young lady among London's elite. The title had been both an honor and a burden, one that brought with it the weight of expectation. Tonight, at Queen Charlotte's ball, I was expected to shine brighter than ever, to captivate the gaze of every eligible suitor, and perhaps, to find a match as fortunate as my sister's.
The gown I wore was a masterpiece of Regency fashion—a flowing creation of silk in a shade that complemented my complexion perfectly. The delicate fabric clung to my form in just the right places, the empire waistline cinched below my bust with a ribbon of deep blue, matching the color of my eyes. My hands, encased in sheer gloves, fluttered slightly as I smoothed the skirt, a gesture of both nerves and excitement.
My hair had been carefully styled into a high bun, every strand meticulously placed by my lady’s maid, revealing the nape of my neck. I had always been told that it was a subtle but powerful feature, an allure that added to the elegance of my presence. The pearls that adorned my ears and the simple necklace at my throat were the finishing touches, heirlooms passed down through generations of the Y/L/N family.
As I studied my reflection, I couldn’t help but think of my sister. She had found her match at a similar ball, her marriage a love story that had become the envy of the ton. I longed for the same, for a partner who would see beyond my title and status, who would love me for who I truly was. But with the eyes of the entire nobility upon me, the pressure was immense.
My mother’s voice broke through my thoughts, calling from the hallway. "Y/N, you must hurry! The carriage is ready, and we mustn't keep the queen waiting!"
I took a deep breath, steadying myself. "Yes mama, I'm ready!" I called back, my voice steady despite the flutter in my heart. I knew the importance of this night, of the decisions that could be made under the glittering chandeliers of the palace. 
As I left my room and descended the grand staircase of our home, my parents waited at the bottom, my mother’s eyes gleaming with pride, while my father’s expression was one of quiet approval. They had prepared me for this moment, for the role I was to play tonight.
The journey to Buckingham Palace was brief but felt endless as my mind raced with thoughts of what the evening would bring. As we approached, the palace loomed before us, its grand façade lit by hundreds of torches, welcoming the nobility of England to another night of tradition and potential romance.
Upon arrival, we were greeted with all the pomp and ceremony befitting our station. The grand hall was filled with the most prominent families, their gowns and jewels sparkling under the brilliant chandeliers. Musicians played a lively tune, and the air was thick with the scent of roses and the murmur of conversation.
"Make sure to keep a bright smile on your face!" my mother advised, reminding me that a lady with a confident smile is a force to be reckoned with in the world of high society.
I took a deep breath, feeling the weight of her words. The carriage door opened, revealing the grand entrance to the castle, illuminated by the soft glow of lanterns. The night was alive with the murmur of conversation and the rustling of elegant gowns as guests moved gracefully toward the ballroom.
As we stepped out onto the cobblestone path, I reminded myself of the importance of this evening. My every move, every glance, and yes, every smile, would be scrutinized by the eyes of the ton. But I was ready. I had been prepared for this moment, and I knew that tonight could change the course of my future.
With a final, reassuring glance at my mother, I allowed a confident smile to grace my lips and walked forward, ready to embrace whatever the night would bring.
As I made my entrance, I could feel the eyes of the ton upon me, whispers following my every step. But I held my head high, my mother’s lessons on poise and grace echoing in my mind. Tonight, I was not just Y/N Y/L/N; I was the Diamond of the season, and I would fulfill the role expected of me.
The evening unfolded as I had anticipated, with numerous introductions and dances. The suitors who sought my favor were charming and well-mannered, each attempting to outshine the others. But as the night wore on, I found myself seeking something more—an encounter that would set my heart alight, a connection that would make me believe in the possibility of love.
It was then, as I stood near the refreshment table, a glass of champagne in hand, that I felt a presence beside me. Turning slightly, I found myself gazing into the eyes of a man who took my breath away. He was tall, with dark hair that was slightly tousled in a way that suggested both nobility and a hint of rebellion. His eyes, a striking shade of green, held a depth that immediately captivated me.
"Lady Y/L/N," he said with a bow, his voice smooth and warm, "I hope I am not too bold in asking for a dance."
I recognized him instantly—Prince Charles Leclerc, the talk of the ton, known for his charm and his title as the most eligible bachelor in Europe. But there was something in his gaze that set him apart from the others, something that made my heart skip a beat.
"Your Highness," I replied, curtsying gracefully, "I would be honored."
As we moved to the dance floor, the orchestra struck up a waltz, and the world around us seemed to fade away. His hand rested lightly on my waist, guiding me effortlessly across the floor, and I found myself losing track of time, of the whispers around us, of everything but the man before me.
"You are as enchanting as the rumors suggest," he murmured, his eyes never leaving mine.
"And you, Your Highness, are as charming as they say," I replied, feeling a smile tug at the corners of my lips.
For the first time that evening, I felt a spark of hope—a sense that perhaps, like my sister, I too could find happiness in a match made at one of these grand balls. But as the music came to an end and the dance concluded, I knew that this was only the beginning. The path ahead was uncertain, and the world of the ton was filled with both opportunity and danger.
The grand ballroom of Buckingham Palace is bathed in the warm glow of chandeliers, the air filled with the soft strains of the orchestra. The guests, adorned in their finest attire, swirl around the room in a dance of color and elegance. After a waltz that left many in awe, Lady Y/N Y/L/N and Prince Charles Leclerc step off the dance floor, finding a quiet corner to converse.
"You dance with such grace, Lady Y/L/N. It is no wonder you have been declared the Diamond of the season. I must admit, I’ve rarely enjoyed a waltz as much as I did with you tonight," Prince Charles said, offering me a glass of champagne.
"Your Highness flatters me. But I believe it is your skill as a partner that made the dance so memorable. I must thank you for that," I replied, accepting the glass with a slight blush, my voice steady but tinged with warmth.
Prince Charles softened his gaze as he leaned in slightly, lowering his voice so only I could hear. "It is not mere flattery, I assure you. In a room full of splendor, you outshine them all. I find myself drawn to your presence, Lady Y/N, more than I have been to any other in quite some time."
My heart quickened, but I maintained my composure, meeting his gaze with a calm yet curious expression. "You honor me with your words, Your Highness. But I must wonder, what is it that truly draws you to me? The season has seen many a lady catch your eye, has it not?"
Prince Charles paused, considering my question thoughtfully before responding with sincerity. "Indeed, there have been many beautiful and accomplished ladies this season. Yet, from the moment we met, there has been something... different about you. A strength, a wit, a kindness that goes beyond mere appearances. It is as though you see the world with a clarity that others do not, and I find that both intriguing and refreshing."
My eyes softened as I listened, my own curiosity deepening as I spoke more openly. "I must confess, Your Highness, I had not expected such earnestness from a prince. The world we live in often demands appearances over authenticity. It is rare to find someone who values the latter."
Prince Charles nodded, a serious yet gentle expression crossing his face. "You speak the truth, Lady Y/N. The weight of expectation can be a heavy burden. But in your company, I feel a sense of ease, as if I can be... simply myself. Tell me, do you share this feeling?"
Pausing for a moment, my gaze grew thoughtful as I considered his words. "Yes, Your Highness, I believe I do. In your company, I find myself able to speak more freely, to be more at ease than I often am in such settings. Perhaps it is because you see beyond the surface, just as you have seen beyond mine."
A warm smile spread across Prince Charles's face as he heard my words. Stepping a little closer, he lowered his voice once more. "Then perhaps, Lady Y/N, this is the beginning of something more than mere titles and duties. Perhaps this is the start of a genuine connection, one that I would very much like to explore further... if you would allow me."
I could feel my heart flutter at the sincerity in his eyes. Returning his smile, I replied softly, but with a voice filled with promise, "I would very much like that, Your Highness."
The night had passed peacefully, spent in conversation with Prince Charles. It was a chance for us to truly get to know each other, and by the time morning arrived, a sense of understanding and connection had begun to blossom between us.
The next morning, after a pleasant breakfast with my father and mother, our maid entered the room carrying two issues of Lady Whistledown’s paper. By now, we were quite familiar with the name, and the anticipation of what the infamous writer might reveal this time hung in the air.
My mother, holding the paper, began to read aloud. As she progressed through each line, her expression shifted from mild curiosity to wide-eyed surprise. Finally, she turned to me, her voice laced with both excitement and concern.
"Y/N, my daughter, read what Lady Whistledown has written. Is it true? Tell me."
Curiosity piqued, I took the paper from her hands and quickly scanned the contents. A mix of shock and confusion washed over me. How could Lady Whistledown have known such private details? I could only manage a somewhat awkward response to my mother’s inquiry.
“Dearest gentle readers,
Another season has come to an end, and once again, a new Diamond has been crowned. If you happened to miss the excitement, this season's Diamond is none other than Miss Y/N Y/L/N, a young lady from the distinguished house of Y/L/N.
But the season's drama did not end there. Prince Charles himself has proposed marriage to Miss Y/L/N. It seems the lady could not resist the undeniable charm of the prince. But will this union be one of true love, or is it merely a match made for mutual benefit? Only time will reveal the truth.
Yours Truly,
Lady Whistledown”
[to be continue…]
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If we react so fiercly to a scene that's like a 5/10 spice, I'm scared to imagine what will happen when we get the actual spicy scenes or a kiss that's gonna be like ♾️/10 on the hotness scale
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natti-ice · 6 months
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Hi lovely!
Could I ask for a Benedict fic where him and reader get pretty messy with the his paints? 💕🥹
Pairing: Benedict Bridgerton x fem!reader
Warnings: 18+ mdni, nudity, sensual touching, kissing, implied sex (1k words)
Reblogs and comments are greatly appreciated<3
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You had met Benedict at a social event this past season and the two of you got on very well, any time you saw each other in passing you had to stop and make conversation. You felt at ease with him, he was so down to Earth unlike most of the uptight socialites of the city. You were very fond of him in general and it seemed he felt the same about you. Not to mention the fact you were also very attracted to him. He often spoke to you about his art and his passion for finding the beauty in life, he showed you his work book of sketches, all of random things he found beautiful even if most people don't.
Today on a casual stroll in the park, Benedict casually asked you if you would like to be the subject of one of his paintings, you had never thought of modeling before but it intrigued you. You were always curious on how people viewed you and this would show you his perspective of you, so you agreed. He brought you back to his studio and showed you some of paintings he had hanging around by artists that inspired him, then he lead you over to the center of the room where he had a large sheet of white paper spread across the floor. You assumed it was to protect his floors from any paint drippings but you were quite wrong.
"This is our canvas for today, my lady" Benedict smiles
You chuckle and furrow your brows a bit "I'm sorry what? Are you going to draw a life size version of me?"
"No, dear" he laughs softly "I'm going to paint with you. I want to use your body as a brush, if that's okay with you of course" he adds that last part in quickly to reassure you can pull out at any time. There's a sparkle in his eyes as he explains how he wants to cover your nude bodies in paint and roll around making an abstract design. "So, what do you say?" His voice is filled with hope, he desperately wants you to say yes.
You think about his offer for a moment, the thought of being naked with him excites you but also makes you very nervous. You have only known him a short amount of time but you trust him a lot, you nod with a soft smile "okay, I'm in."
"Excellent" he grins and claps his hands together once "you can get undressed while I prepare the paints." he gives you a comforting smile then turns around and walks to the back of his studio where he keeps his paint. You slowly start to undress, you feel the butterflies in your stomach intensifying as you shed each piece of clothing. Finally naked, you fold your clothes neatly and set them on a small sofa nearby. The window of the studio is cracked out letting in a soft breeze, you feel goosebumps grow on your bare skin and your nipples become erect.
A few moments later, Benedict came back carrying a tray with small cans full of paint "alright here we are-" he stops dead in his tracks when he sees you, his eyes wide in surprise as he takes all of you in "wow... you're absolutely breathtaking" his voice is so soft it's almost a whisper
You chuckle nervously, you feel your whole body start to heat up "um, thank you, sir" you wrap your arms around your body, very aware of how exposed you are. He steps closer to you and sets the tray on a small table, he picks up a can filled with red paint and holds it up to you.
"May I?" He asks for permission, you nod slightly giving him full access to your body. He dips two fingers into the paint and slowly runs them along your collar bone, it slowly starts to drip down your front as your body temperature melts the paint. He works his way down your body, streaking the red all over you, his fingertips ever so slightly graze your nipples sending a shiver down your spine. "Beautiful" he whispers softly before setting the paint canister down and began to strip his clothes off.
You watched him closely as each article of clothing flew from his body leaving him bare in front of you. He gripped your arm softly and turned you around, he slowly poured some of the paint down your back letting it cascade down your back. He presses himself against your back slightly, you can feel his breath tickling your neck as he began to place soft hot kisses along the side. He used one hand to rub the red all over your back, a gasp caught in your throat as his larges hands rubbed soft circles on your ass.
When he finished he turned you around to face him, he picked up a can of blue paint and handed it to you "now you do me" his voice soft but laced with something more sensual. You take the can and start to smear blue all over his body, trying desperately to avoid his intimate areas as best as possible even if it was staring right at you. Once he was blue from the neck down he gently took your hand and brought you down to the paper on the floor. "Lay back, darling," he instructed playfully "we're gonna roll around a bit" he chuckles before rolling on top of you, his arms wrapped around your body as he goes in for a kiss.
Things escalated quickly from there, paint began to adorn the paper as you two made love. Shades of blue and red mixed together leaving streaks of purple behind, hand prints of different colors could be seen throughout the paper. Moans filled the studio, there was also the occasional sound of paper ripping when things became too intense. When it was all said and done, Benedict framed the work and even put it up in a gallery. People always asked how he created such an abstract piece of art, he came up with a story of how he just started throwing paint at the canvas. Only you and him ever knew the truth.
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dreamscribee · 5 months
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💎The Season's Diamond💎
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✩₊˚.⋆☾⋆⁺₊✧✩₊˚.⋆☾⋆⁺₊✧✩₊˚.⋆☾⋆⁺₊✧✩₊˚.⋆☾⋆⁺₊✧✩₊˚.⋆☾⋆⁺₊✧✩₊˚.⋆☾⋆⁺₊✧✩₊˚
ʚɞ Anthony Bridgerton x female reader
ʚɞ PART 2 and PART 3
ʚɞ Summary: Amidst preparations for the Queen's ball where the season's Diamond will be chosen, Lady Y/N Dalton navigates her feelings for her close friend Anthony. As plans and secrets unfold with the help of the Bridgerton family, Y/N faces a transformative evening that could determine her future.
ʚɞ Word Count: 530 (Words), 3,158 (characters)
ʚɞ Warning: This ends with a cliffhanger, more parts will come.
✩₊˚.⋆☾⋆⁺₊✧✩₊˚.⋆☾⋆⁺₊✧✩₊˚.⋆☾⋆⁺₊✧✩₊˚.⋆☾⋆⁺₊✧✩₊˚.⋆☾⋆⁺₊✧✩₊˚.⋆☾⋆⁺₊✧✩₊˚.
At the bustling French boutique Modiste, Madame Delacroix flitted around you, pinning and tucking the fabric of a gown that shimmered like the morning dew. The air was filled with the scent of fresh silks and the soft murmur of anticipation. Lady Bridgerton, standing by your mother, was deep in conversation, plotting with a fervor only matched by their desire to see you named the Diamond of the season.
"You truly have an eye for elegance, Y/N," Lady Bridgerton praised, watching you twirl gently in your nearly finished gown. "This shade of blue not only complements your eyes but also sets you apart in any crowd. The Queen herself will be enchanted, I dare say."
Your mother nodded in agreement, her eyes gleaming with pride. "Indeed, Violet. With this gown and the right presentation at the ball, Y/N will outshine all. We must consider every detail meticulously."
As plans were laid and laughter shared, the evening sun dipped below the horizon, casting long shadows through the windows of the Bridgerton estate where dinner awaited. You felt a flutter of excitement, not just for the ball but for the chance to spend more time with Anthony, whose earlier attentions had left your heart racing.
Dinner was a lively affair at the Bridgerton household, filled with boisterous talk and the clinking of silverware. Anthony sat across from you, his gaze often lingering longer than was customary, filled with an unspoken question. Every smile, every glance sent a thrill of wonder through your heart about his true feelings.
As dessert was served—a delightful array of sweets that only added to the evening’s indulgence—Anthony cleared his throat, capturing the attention of everyone at the table.
"Lady Dalton, Y/N," he began, his voice steady but imbued with a warmth that made your pulse quicken, "I have been considering the upcoming ball and the Queen’s selection of the Diamond. While we all hope for the best, I believe Y/N’s brilliance is evident to all, regardless of titles or accolades bestowed."
You blushed, heart pounding, as murmurs of agreement circled the table.
Anthony continued, "In fact, I would like to propose a toast." He raised his glass, his eyes locking with yours. "To Y/N, whose grace and beauty surpass any jewel in the Queen's crown. May she always shine as brightly as she does tonight."
Glasses clinked in unison, and cheers filled the room. Your eyes met Anthony’s, and in that moment, you sensed the depth of his regard, something perhaps deeper than mere friendship. But before you could ponder it further, Lady Bridgerton leaned in, her voice low and conspiratorial.
"And now, my dear, we have a surprise for you tomorrow that might just tip the scales in our favor for the Queen’s decision," she whispered, a mischievous twinkle in her eye.
Your heart skipped a beat, curiosity piqued. "What kind of surprise?"
"You shall see," Lady Bridgerton replied, the mystery lingering in the air as dinner concluded and the evening waned. You were left wondering about Anthony’s lingering looks and the impending surprise, your mind a whirl of possibilities as the night drew to a close, setting the stage for an unforgettable day to come.
︵‿︵‿︵‿︵︵‿︵‿︵‿︵︵‿︵‿︵‿︵︵‿︵‿︵‿︵︵‿
Just binged Bridgerton in prep for Season 3 and now I'm basically an expert on all things Anthony 🎩✨. Brace yourselves for a deluge of Bridgerton bros content - it's about to get regal up in here! 🍿👑 #TheViscountWhoLovedMe #MoreBridgertonBrosPlease
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smolvenger · 4 months
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The Baronet Seeks A Wife, Chapter One.
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A Crimson Peak Multi-Part Fanfiction.
Thomas Sharpe x fem! Reader Arranged Marriage AU.
Summary: England in the 1890s. When your spirited sister, Charlotte, defies your family by running away from her arranged engagement to Sir Thomas Sharpe, you are the one who must keep your family from scandal and ruin...by taking her place as the baronet's bride.
Word Count: >7K words. You may want tea and scones as a repast as you read this.
Warnings: Angst, some hurt/comfort, and fluff at the end. I attempt to convey the period as accurately as I can bc if you don't like it or find it interesting why write it. Period accurate attitudes of gender and social class. Mentions and discussions of sex, but no smut (yet...let me just say...after Bridgerton season 3 episode four...I have *ideas* heheheheh). Brief mention of childbirth. The fear of domestic violence is mentioned, but not portrayed. Grammar and spelling mistakes. If I miss something and you see something that could be triggering that I didn't mention, then it is your responsibility to please please please tell me. I will take full accountability for how I portray marginalized groups and sensitive subject matter and make sure to better my writing and make sure affected parties are protected.
A03//My Ko-Fi//My Etsy Shop//Masterlist//Wattpad
Taglist: @asgards-princess-of-mischief @jennyggggrrr @five-miles-over @fictive-sl0th @ladycamillewrites @villainousshakespeare @holdmytesseract @eleniblue @twhxhck @lokisgoodgirl @lovelysizzlingbluebird @raqnarokr @holymultiplefandomsbatman @michelleleewise @wolfsmom1 @cheekyscamp @mochie85 @fandxmslxt69 @skittslackoffilter @mischief2sarawr @jijilaufeyson @steasstuff @anukulee @kimi01985 @goblingirlsarah @foxherder @giona45-5 @goddessgirl43
London, 1898.
“I won’t marry him!” your sister cried.
You have seen this scene plenty of times. You could recount it like a play production you had seen too much. You were sitting in the parlor, trying to read a book and rest your feet. But your mother and your older sister, Lottie, were on each other’s last nerves.
‘Lottie, you have to!” your mother insisted.
You found you couldn’t focus on the words. You only sat there in stillness, watching in silence. A maid walked by the door, her eyes flicking over to the scene, but then she kept walking down the hallway.
Your mother pressed a hand to her forehead and sighed as if in pain. 
Your older sister, Charlotte, was curling her fists on her side. The red dress, the new one father ordered for her at the shop, only made her seem angrier. She was literally burning with the fire of fury.
Mama let out a huff. Then she glared at Charlotte, her arms akimbo.
“Listen to me. Right. Now.” your mother began.
You felt bad for your mother. There was a lot on her mind. To have both daughters out in society at one time. They agreed it wasn’t fair for one daughter to go about having fun when the other couldn’t. Charlotte was older, so she was more experienced in being out in society. She made her debut it seemed ages ago. You recalled your own debut. You had your turn to wear white and curtsy before the queen before she dismissed you for the next girl. You were already beaming with excitement. Ready to enter the glittering, grown-up world of the London social season. Prepared to dine and dance in pretty dresses every April until August.
But every year, it seemed the bags under Charlotte’s eyes increased. Now years had passed since then. And mam still had two daughters who were still out. And unmarried.
Charlotte dreaded going from your country home to London for the warmer months.She hated the constant balls, parties, meals, picnics. She at least liked riding her horse in Hyde Park but loathed she couldn’t go faster. She would sneak out to smoke cigars. Bugs and reptiles fascinated her more than gossip. She scribbled down notes. She turned prickly if any man asked for a dance. She spoke boldly and even swore. She enjoyed the horse races and polo games and sports, but the art of feminine flirting was beyond her.
But your parents had plenty of money and two daughters. But only so much money could support so many seasons. And as the eldest, the pressure was on Charlotte. There was the occasional brave soul who proposed marriage to her. Only to face the inevitable, flat rejection.
So Mama and Papa took matters into their own hands.
Mama met enough people who networked her to cross paths with a single baronet. They porposed a marriage between him and Charlotte, to which he agreed. Your sister was engaged after a mere three meetings with the fellow. Not that you had a chance to meet him either. So no rejection. No proposal. A ring on Lottie’s finger forcibly placed on her like a child force-fed turnips to her mouth.
“Lottie, do you know how much that dress costs? The very one on your back? Every season, your father and I make sure you and your sister have new gowns so you may be presentable in public. That is what they demand- that eligible ladies always dress in fresh new clothes. So any gentleman will not scoff at you wearing yesterday’s rag. You may not like it- but this is for your future. For your family’s future.  May I remind you- You are the eldest. You must make a good match not only for your sake- but your sister’s future. If you marry well-then she will be set up to succeed. There are plenty of decent men with more than enough money to make you comfortable here. Every year, they ask to dance with you. Every year, at least one proposes. And every year, you say no. ”
Charlotte huffed, folding her arms.
‘I didn’t want to marry them. Any of them. I wouldn’t make them happy and they wound’t make me happy at all.”
Your mother glared down.
“You have had more than enough chances to secure yourself forever. Do you want to live at the mercy of your father’s charity all of your days? If he cut you off this minute and threw you out of the house, you would have nowhere to go, and no way to survive. Lottie, do you realize how many seasons you have had? Do you realize how much we must pay more and more for you both to be presentable when you are out? Do you realize how much this is costing us and yourself?” she scolded.
She caught her breath. Charlotte was breathing hard, and you could see glimmers of tears in her eyes. Mama stepped closer.
“Charlotte…you’re no figure of pity. Not yet. You have had plenty of chances- they still call you the Wild Rose of London. Your face won over dukes, earls-so many girls would have loved to be in your shoes!” she said softly.
Mama was right. Charlotte was considered the beauty of the family. When she made her debut, heads turned to look at her. Everyone, you included, thought she would make a match easily. After all, your father was in charge of a great business that made a lot of money. You were now part of the upper crust. So a pretty face, a decent family reptutation and a sizable dowry with her bold, vivacious character would have won someone’s heart. And in a way they did. The first man who proposed to Charlotte you thought was going to be like shooting a sitting duck.
Even though “spinsterhood” did nothing to dampen  your sister’s face,you were all proven wrong. Very, very wrong. 
Lottie slouched as much as she could in her gown and frowned. A habit she never abandoned as a child.
“Your father had to take action. You will be a part of the esteemed Sharpe baronacy and he will reap the monetary benefits. He is a nice man, pleasant, charming, and he will take care of-”
“So am I nothing more than a thing you auction off at a bazaar? Not a person with a heart? With feelings?” Lottie combated.
“We were going to be driven at this rate to ill repute, and financial ruin all because you wouldn’t marry!” your mother argued.
“Then why not let me wear an old dress?” Lottie shot back. “Or have me not do a season! Let me remain a spinster and paddle my own canoe!” 
“Sir Sharpe will take care of you. He promised it!” Mama assured.
“Being stuffy old Lady Sharpe and wasting my life in balls and parties is going to drive me to insanity! An arranged marriage- mama, it’s practically medieval!” Lottie shouted.
Your mother folded her hands.
“Your father has set it in stone. There is no point in this conversation. You are going to marry Sir Thomas Sharpe, and that is final!”
Your sister jumped up. She stormed off, slamming the door shut childishly as she huffed off to her room.
Your mother turned to you. You sat in your own blue tea gown, not expecting company. For a night of no events in the London season was a special treat. All of the picnics, lunch parties, park trips, operas, theatre, and balls were fun- but back to back, it was exhausting. But hearing your mother and sister yell at each other was ten times worse than the exhaustion. 
You stood up.
“Am I….a bad mother?” she asked. You saw tears in her eyes too.
You put a hand on her shoulder, a fine, matronly gown of dark green brocade. You offered her a handkerchief. 
“I only think you are a desperate mother put into a difficult situation.”
“She won’t listen to me. Much less your father…she only listens to you anymore. I hate we must do this…and I hate myself,” she sniffled. 
You patted her shoulder.
“Mama, let me speak with her. Let me help patch things up. Make her happy,” you offered.
She nodded. You exited the library, walking up the stairs to Lottie’s bedroom. The odd servant paused in their dusting to curtsy at you. You wold give them a nod and a smile, before you continued. Walking past vases of daffodils and over velvet rugs, you found the door locked shut. Crying coming from inside.
You knocked on the door.
“Go away, papa!” she fussed.
“Lottie, it’s not papa, it’s me!” you assured her.
Your sister went over and opened the door, letting you in and shutting it after you entered. With it’s wine red wallpaper, the place seemed to be dark as the sun was dipping outside. Her desk empty of any papers and her hat set on top. Her colllections of newspapers piled on one chair near her parasol. The drawer where she hid her cigars was kept with a lock and a key she dared not tell even you.
“Lottie…I’m so sorry you have to do this, and how miserable it makes you…it sounds like a nightmare,” you admitted.
You could see tears streaming down her face.
“Do you remember when I was eleven and asked mama and papa for a pet snake? They know how much I love snakes- they’d give me little toy snakes. I wanted a real one. I’d call her Cleopatra for the irony of it. But they said no. Every year I asked and they kept saying no.would always say no. They try….but they can’t love me, or understand me. And I keep trying to please them…and I keep failing and now…they’re throwing…”
She sat on the bed and began to cry. And you hugged her.
“Here….here…” you said. “My poor girl, my poor Lottie!” you cooed. 
“I want to go places. Have adventures and jolly, capital times.  I want to run, and explore and see things! Not be stuffy old Lady Sharpe in some stupid house having babies until I’m killed from it!” she mourned.
She shoved aside her journal and laid down on her bed. Tears streaming her face.
“It’s what you deserve…Lottie. A life like that! But now,  we need to think of what we can do and not what we can’t do,” you suggested.
You paused, thinking for a second. You leaned closer as she turned away. A gentle hand on her side.
“Sir Sharpe…you’ve met him, haven’t you? What is he like?” you asked.
“He talks about his stupid inventions all day,” she muttered from her side. “And he won’t answer anything about what his dead sister was like or what was in that old mansion.”
There were only three things you knew about Sir Sharpe as of this morning. He was a baronet. He grew up in a mansion called Allerdale Hall. He lost an older sister. But that was it. Now thanks to Lottie, the sum rallied up to four.
You leaned closer, more mischief in your voice. You hushed to a whisper.
“What does he even look like? Perhaps he’s at least handsome! Maybe at least…on your wedding night…” 
Lottie turned over, wrinkling her nose. 
“I’m sorry, YN, but he’s ugly! He has a big forehead, and big ears, and a big old nose!” she cried. Her voice far too loud for the question you asked.
She grabbed her pillow and hugged it around her.
“Don’t get me started on my marital duties. I could retch at the thought of it. If Sir Sharpe even thinks of going to bed with me, I’ll box his big ears off!” she decalred.
Part of you couldn’t help but laugh a little. Even Lottie’s own pretty, pink mouth was curved up in a small smile at her own words.
“Practice on that pillow!” you dared.
She hit the pillow again and again.
“This I’ll give Sir Sharpe and -this! I’ll give Sir Sharpe!”
She reached over and got her parasol and gave it a few more good whacks. Feathers were starting to burst out from it and litter the floor.
“Heavens, at this rate you’d have killed him!” you commented. 
“He would have earned it!” she replied.
‘“Then you’ll be a criminal and I’d have to bail you out of prison!” you replied.
“Oh no! Then I guess we must be outlaws and run off and live like Robin Hood and the rest! Better than listening to Mrs. Mean drone on about governesses!”
Both of you burst into laughter. The Means lived up to their name and every reception they found a new group of people to complain about. You both heard it all and had to silently look at each other to promise to only laugh at them when it was done.
You both laughed, smilng bright. How you missed the easy days of your younger years. You could play about and get in and out of trouble. You and your sister knew where to strike to hurt each other, but couldn’t live without the other. You fought as intensely as you played. You did everything side by side. You took her hand and hugged her again, even though she was still sniffling.
Lottie sagged her shoulders. Her hold on the pillow loosening.
“But…I’m unhappy. I wake up every day with this and I’m miserable. Like I can’t get out.” she sighed.
“Think of this….” you reasoned. “I hear husbands are easier to manage and persuade then fathers! Once you have money and you’re not under their thumb, you can go about as you want and do what you want! Idon’t think Sir Sharpe would stop you….”
You paused. A horrified shiver ran through you.
“Not that I…know much about him. Do you think he….did he ever…ever…hurt you?” you asked.
She shook her head.
“No, he hasn’t been less than gentlemanly. And he wouldn’t hurt me in any way after we’re married, I’m sure.” she replied.
You both sat on the bed and held hands.
“Then don’t be afraid, Lottie…maybe marriage isn’t a prison, but your key to freedom! Once you’re a married woman, you can do whatever you want and Sir Sharpe won’t stop you. And if he does anything, tell me. And I’ll box his ears!” you replied.
Lottie’s tears were drying in trails down her cheeks. Yet she smiled in spite of herself. Then you hugged one last time.
“I should ring for some cakes and mint tea from Anne! That will cheer you up!” you said.
As you rang the bell for them. Anne, one of your maids, hurried up. She took the order and promptly left. She returned with a tray in only ten minutes. You both relaxed on chairs as the tray balanced on a mahogany table.
Turning, you saw Lottie write about in her journal.
“Oh, croissants! My favorites,” Lottie cooed. She picked up one and began to dig in.
“I’m just glad you have thing that make you happy…I just want you to be happy, Lottie,” you said.
The pastry returned to her plate.
“And…YN…”
Her mouth opened as if to speak. Then she stopped. She reached over and held your cheek. Studying you carefully, as if you were a piece of art. A work she could only admire in person once before she had to leave. Something she had to commit to memory. There was a sad smile on her face.
There was a sad smile on her face.
“I want you to be happy too…”
She kissed your forehead and you smiled. As she helped herself to a big slice of strawberry cake. Her eyes were tired, crinkly.
“I think Lady Charlotte Sharpe has a ring to it. Like the heroine of a book!” you said.
Charlotte turned to face the window. The sun melting down and the sky promising night.
“But this isn’t a book, this is reality…” she responded.
She looked at you and then at the ring on her finger. The engagement ring already commissioned. Costly and pretty, but useless and ominous on Lottie’s hand.
“I think you would have liked him...” she said.
“Sir Sharpe will be nice to have as a brother,” you replied.
She looked at you. But said nothing as she nibbled on her croissant. As the tray was partially emptied, you excused yourself. But Lottie caught your arm. You saw her lip quiver. She leaned closer, her voice quiet. And Lottie was not a person who liked to be quiet. 
“I’ll always remember that your words. That we must do what we can and not dwell on what we can’t. Thank you, Y/N. Thank you for the tea, too.”
By dinner time, she was quiet. She dressed nicely and ate modestly. Then went to bed without a word to you.  As you went back up to change for bed. How unlike her! Your sister was chattiest at night! But you but shrugged it off. She was probably just exhausted. London’s balls lasted from night until six in the morning and you would be lying if you said they didn’t take a toll on you too. And you would need some rest if there were to be callers, a garden party, and maybe a horse ride in the park  the next day.
❁ ≖≖✿❁ ≖≖✿❁ ≖≖✿❁ ≖≖ ❁
When you awoke the next morning, the sunlight streamed like melten butter into your room. Outside, it was another lovely day in May. People were already tittering about the Ascot opening later this month.
Your maid helped you into your day outfit of a white lace skirt and a blue skirt with flowers patterned with silk. You only hoped Lottie had improved. Before breakfast, you would check.
You knocked on her door.
“Lottie! Good morning!”
No reply.
“The chef is making us bacon! It’s going to be delicious!”
No response. 
You beat your fists against the door.
Nothing. And she was a light sleeper.
“Lottie?” you called out louder.
You realized the door was unlocked and opened easily.
She was gone. Servants followed you inside. Her bed wasn’t made, there was no sign of her.
“Is she in the garden? Is she riding in Hyde park this early? ” you asked Anne. But the maid shook her head.
Then, to your shock, you saw there was a piece of paper on it. And a ring. Coming closer, you saw it was her engagement ring.
You felt the world pause as you read her handwriting.
“Hello everyone,
You need not fear, for I am not hurt or seduced by some scoundrel.
I cannot be Sir Sharpe’s wife.
I love all of you. But I cannot do this. This is not what I want for my life.
I shall be safe, do not worry.
But do not try to reach me for some time.
All of my love.
Charlotte Y/L/N.”
Breath knocked out of you. You stood frozen. You hardly heard your parents rushing in. You didn’t feel your father snatching the letter from your hands. Looking down, they were still in the air and shaking.
Your mother began to sob.
All of your plans were canceled. A private detective was hired and Charlotte’s lady’s maid was fired for permitting this. Though the sobbing maid insisted she didn’t know where Charlotte went. All day long, people scurried about in a panic. 
You felt tears well up in your own eyes. Alone in your room, it was your turn to burst into crying.  It was already as if your dear sister was already dead.
You recalled the letter said she was unharmed. She wasn’t about to be left pregnant with some scoundrel’s bastard. She hadn’t…taken her own life and for her to return only as a corpse. As far as you knew, no news meant she was alive and safe. That would have destroyed you. Taking hope in that, you went back to put on a brave face to your family.
There was the odd caller in the afternoon. But their noses were upturned. Knowing they would report anything and everything. The slight smiles on their faces as they looked about made you want to scream.
Why didn’t Charlotte think about this? The next day, your grief boiled to a silent rage. By running off and vanishing, it meant there was a scandal. And now society would all turn their faces away from you. They would frown and whisper and gossip. The unvirtuous daughter who ran off. And no one would want to go to your parties or dinners. No one would want to see you or associate with you. And no man would ever want to marry you, knowing you were the sister of the runaway spinster of a disgraced family.
That last part pained you. Not that you knew from Charlotte there was shame in being a spinster. But…you hoped to fall in love. Not just to marry a man of stability, to meet a wonderful, nice man who made your heart patter fast. To be kissed and receive valentines and dance and have him drop to his knees, begging for you. Just like in the fictional books you loved. 
But the days dragged by. The detective returned after a week and shook his head. And the hope for anything good in your future seemed more and more like a fiction itself.
❁ ≖≖✿❁ ≖≖✿❁ ≖≖✿❁ ≖≖ ❁
You paced about in the gardens one afternoon. It was better to do something with your anxious energy. Two weeks and no sign where Lottie vanished. You sat by, hoping the coolness of the breeze drifting through flowers would calm you. But not even the loveliness of an English June could distract you.
Anne stepped forward and curtsied.
“Pardon me, Miss. But your father wants to have a word with you in private,” she announced.
She led you up, taking you to Papa’s study. It was a room in dark green, his favorite color. A few books lined up the walls and his desk was placed behind the window. Your father was staring outside when he turned around as you were brought in.
“Ah, sit down, my dear,” he requested.
You obeyed. Sitting on the wooden chair before his desk. Your father brought out a decanter of brandy and poured himself some in a little glass. You noticed it was a generous amount. Not that you would blame him.
He poured himself a second glass and offered it to you.
“I have some news with you, Y/N…” he began.
“Have they found her?” you asked with hope.
“No. And that is exactly why I have to tell you this…”
If there was no update, then what could it be? You wondered. You took the cup and held it in your hands. A little hesitant to drink it yet since it was still so bright in the day.  It didn’t feel right to drink such a spirit so early to you. Something was brewing- you just had to let him say it. 
“The engagement between your sister and Sir Sharpe it was…it is still and shall be beneficial. To us and to the Baronet. We must be respected by all sorts of society through connection to the baronacy. He needed the money- his own little toys wouldn’t be enough to sustain a gentleman’s life. And with Charlotte’s disappearance- you understand why we don’t have as many visitors as we do?”
“It’s a scandal, papa, I know.” you replied.
“But…we must return to society. We cannot show up defeated. We cannot let them beat us. We cannot become a laughingstock or a figure of pity.”
Where was he going with this? You held your tongue and folded your hands. The drink carefully balanced over your lap. He was only repeating everything you already knew.
“There is one way out that solves all our problems. Especially if at this point, Charlotte isn’t to be found…”
“We can’t give up on finding her, on making sure she is safe!” you insisted.
“We have more immediate matters..” he continued.
You raised the glass to your lips, taking only a sip. It burned down your throat onto your churning stomach. Your father looked directly into your eyes.
“ I have one daughter left who is out. But YN, I don’t think there are many gentleman who will want to associate with a ruined family. No gentleman will consider you marriage…But…”
“But?” you prompted.
“But there is one gentleman who doesn’t think so…” he continued.
“Who?” you asked. You put both hands over your cup.
Papa looked directly into your eyes.
“Sir Sharpe.”
Your throat tightened. Part of your vision went dizzy. You began to piece together where this was leading. Nausea gripped your insides as your hold on the glass turned into a grip.
“He knows he needs our money and to be back into society. We still need the respect of his title…and we have a daughter left who must be taken care of…”
You found yourself hyperventilating. Words choked out of you.
“Am I…am I…”
“YN, you are going to marry Sir Sharpe in your sister’s place this coming month.” he announced flatly.
A sound came out of you. You put a hand over your mouth. You now knew what Lottie felt. Your whole body went tight. You had to catch your breath. How glad you were to be sitting, for your legs were already shaking bad and your vision was spinning. You looked down at the floor, trying to pull yourself together. Your father kept talking.
“Now, I know this isn’t pleasant. Especially for a romantic such as yourself. I know you have yet to be formally introduced to him. But, Y/N, my dear- we have to be practical about these matters. There is no respectable solution to this problem at this point, if Charlotte is to not return.”
He was right. As twisted as this was, was there another option? 
Who would want to associate with a family who couldn’t keep an eye on their eldest? Who would want to invite a family who let their daughter run away to their breakfast party? Who would want to court the sister of the woman who ran off from her own marriage? Who would want to marry the daughter of disgraced family? 
The more you thought about it, the more you realized there were few options. You were now too socially stained to marry anyone. Your days would be spent alone. Sitting in your house as others lived their lives happy and free, laughing at you behind closed doors.
Your family had no other options out. 
A marriage to a man who belonged to a knighted family would earn you respect. It would be telling society that at least one man from a respectable house saw worth in you. You would still go to events not as a figure of pity and ridicule, but as one of them- even ranking above them.
You didn’t want to be a figure of ridicule. Someone who everyone would smugly turn. Whispering to each other “how glad I am that I’m not her!”
You had to marry. And marry well.
You would never be proposed to at this point. There would be no courtship. No dances. No poetry. No marriage proposals. No valentines. No love letters. No Passion. No balls. No laughter.
But there was never going to be a proposal like this.
No future. No safety. Nothing if you denied your father or refused him or rebelled as Lottie did.
You would just be tied and tethered to a ruined family all of your days. But becoming Lady Sharpe would free you from that. You could start anew. Spring again like a wild tiger breaking out of its cage to bear her claws.
And this was your only chance.
“Yes, papa. It will be an honor.” you replied. You would do your duty, as all daughters must.
Father walked out from behind, abandoning his drink. He put a hand on your shoulder and then pulled you for a hug.
“There’s my brave girl,” he said.
He released the hug.
“Alright, Sir Sharpe is going to visit at dinner tomorrow. And my associates at work will be there too, to celebrate. That way, you will have a formal introdution and you won’t be walking down the aisle to a complete stranger.”
You felt your fists grab your skirt. With your free hand, you grabbed your cup of brandy and downed it in one gulp. The burning ran through your body, and you prayed it would calm your racing mind.
“Do I need to wear my nicest dress?” you asked. You at least didn’t want Sir Sharpe to think he was settling from the society beauty. Downgraded from the Wild Rose to her frump sister.
“Considering he has already said yes to this arrangement, I doubt wearing your ugliest dress will do anything to about the matter,” replied your father.
❁ ≖≖✿❁ ≖≖✿❁ ≖≖✿❁ ≖≖ ❁
Anne dressed you in a cream dinner dress of country silk and velvet. Your sleeves puffed like clouds. there was lace as a “belt” around your waist. The bottom showed an underskirt that was a color between light brown and pink. Anne had hair like yours, and knew how to style it as you liked. Your dress almost white in the light. Already you were going to meet Thomas looking like a bride.
The grandfather clock in the hall chimed seven o clock. You thought you would sweat through your dress. Part of you was tempted to lock the door and not step a foot out the whole night. But you knew you could not delay the meeting anymore. At this rate, you would just meet him on your wedding day. You just had to get it over with.
Besides, you were going to spend the rest of your life with him until only death or divorce did you part. You were just holding back the inevitable. 
“You look beautiful, miss,” she gushed as she looked at you.
“I wish I was as pretty as Lottie, sometimes. Or as brave as her…” you lamented quietly.
“Don’t compare yourself to her, miss. You know she has her own sufferings. And it will only make you more unhappy.” Anne advised, giving you a pearl necklace. She attached it to you from behind. 
 Both of you looked at your reflection in the mirror. Anne leaned in closer with an encouraging smile. “Just think of all this like armor to a battle, Miss Y/N. You can’t give up the fight, yet.”
I can be brave, like Lottie. I can fight, like she can. You thought. How could you be as stupid as to forget your own advice to her not long ago? You would do your best to find the way to make it a good situation. Manipulate your position and standing to your favor, even. For that was what women always did. For being the “weaker sex”, they always found a way through to survive. So what made you think you would just cry and pity yourself all of your days?
You reminded yourself of this. Still you felt heart racing hard as if the gallows was what awaited you next month and not the altar. Holding your head high, like a queen in her palace, you walked out of your room and downstairs.
A few women had shown up in the foyer. They eyed you greedily but you would not give them a figure to be pitied. You kept a stoic face as they offered a few tepid congratulations. But you felt so buzzed with anxiety, you only half heard.
“We’re so happy you found a husband,” said one.
Husband- husband! A husband! A fiancee! How was it that it happened already? And with no romantic proposal in a moonlit garden away from a ball. Just in an office that smelled of whiskey with your father relaying that you were now engaged. And your husband- no, you weren’t married yet, no need to panic now. Though you saw no men around, you knew that your fiancee was under this roof. 
You didn’t feel ready. You felt like you were just an adolescent playing dress up and not a grown adult. 
“Ah! There you are, YN!” your father greeted as he walked over, dressed in his evening tuxedo. He offered his arm.
“He’s in the library, sharing a drink with the other men. I think it’s time I introduce you both,” he announced.
Swallowing, you took his arm. The one thing keeping you afloat in the ocean of turmoil raging inside you.
Papa walked you over to the library. Your heart picked up as if you were running. In just a few short seconds, you would see the man you were bound to for the rest of your life. Your mind was itself running at a hundred miles a second and you felt yourself shaking like a leaf.
Father turned to the door and your fears screamed inside of you.
You dreaded what your sister said. Her voice ringing in your ears bemoaning Thomas’s apparent ugliness.
“He has a big forehead and big ears and a big old nose!”
He was ugly. You had to settle for that. But what made you were frightened was that perhaps he was a bad person. Perhaps he would hurt you, betray you, break you even.
Wait…didn’t Lottie say herself he wouldn’t treat her in that way? But…you weren’t Lottie! He could act completely differently…
No…you were forming an entire judgement on someone you hadn’t even met!
But, even if he wasn’t handsome…perhaps he would be a nice man. Men didn’t have to be handsome to be good. They could be kind, respectful, patient, gentle, genuinely kind husbands.
So which one was he? A kind, pure soul? Or an irredeemale monster?
Both? In between? Neither? There was only one way to find out. And the answer was standing with the other men beyond that wall.
You took in a deep breath, your father opened the door.
The dark green, musty library already smelled of cigars. Lottie would have loved it. There was a bit of laughter, as their smoke floated to the air. Cups of whiskey was passed and there was talk of this and that issue in Parliment. So many men in black suits like a horde clamored around, as if each one was copied from the other.
Your father cleared his throat.
“Gentlemen, may I introduce to you my daughter, Miss Y/L/N.”
Once, it was Lottie who was “Miss Y/L/N” and you just went by Miss and your first name after. But now that she was gone, you were promoted up. You were Miss Y/L/N and the family’s fortune and future were already on you like a yoke you had to drag across the field.
“It appears that for one of you, you are about to be a very lucky man next month…” your father continued.
One by ones, heads turned to see you. Some in curiosity. Some in boredom. Some in hunger seeing your neckline. You were already making guesses as to who your fiancee was with each passing face. Already one man had a curled mustache. Another had grey hair with busy sideburns. Another round spectacles and short brown hair with a mousy face. Most of them were wrinkled, lined with grey, with a gruffness to their demenaer.
“Sir Sharpe,” your father announced, turning his head.
Your eyes followed at once. That is him- you thought. That  is him! That is him, that is him, thatishimthatishimthatishim-
An old man patted a hand on the shoulder of another. The younger had hair had longer, dark curls He was so deep in conversation with someone that he almost forgot. The grandfather nudged him. The younger figure paused.
“Thomas! I believe your lady is here.”
Then he turned around. 
Thomas Sharpe was the handsomest man you had ever seen. 
The breath you had was knocked out again as you took him in. What on earth was Lottie thinking? Looking at him, you began to question her taste and strength of vision.
Thomas was a tall man with a hair full of raven curls. Slender, but not thin for he had a broad chest. Soft blue eyes that only contrasted with his dark hair and a face the color of porcelain. You now understood the fairy tale of Snow White and why she was the fairest in all the land. For the male equivalent was here before you. He had high cheekbones and large hands. He looked like the hero of a Bronte novel, but one if the author confirmed his handsomeness rather than his ugliness. 
He looked into your eyes and he smiled at you. Butterflies fluttered around your stomach and you could feel your eyes widening.
Your father gestured at him and he walked over.
“Sir Sharpe, this is my daughter.Your fiancee.” your father announced.
“Miss, I am glad to finally be acquainted with you. You look beautiful, tonight,” Sir Sharpe greeted. 
He raised your hand to his lips and looked right into your eyes as kissed your hand. A gasp could not even escape your throat. Something was stirring beneath you when his lips touched your gloved hand. You felt a sensation you dared not name in the most private part of you. 
Finally, steeling yourself back to the earth, you remembered basic etiquette.
“Thank you, Sir Sharpe. I am glad to make your acquaintance as well,” you replied with a curtsy.
Sir Sharpe sat across from you at dinner. You hardly said a word unless someone asked you something. 
You couldn’t believe this. You couldn’t believe him. You somehow found your appetite again and ate. But you felt self conscious with each bite. Thomas was watching you- what was he seeing? Would he judge you? You moved even more carefully and properly as you could.
 Every time your eyes met,  Every time he looked at you, a heat rushed through your whole body and your eyes would return demurely back to your plate or the napkin on your lap. When he smiled at you, you felt as if you could die. You had to remember your feet was touching the ground as you wiggled your toes in your pointed shoes.. 
He spoke poliely when asked to, but mainly listened. There was polite talk about the weather or the Ascot opening race. Thomas would ask you about what you thought and you found your replies were timid. You didn’t want to make a wrong move, you didn’t want him to hate you, you didn’t want-
Then your father stood up, raising a glass.
“Now, everyone,” he declared. “Let us have a toast. To Sir Sharpe, the delightful Baronet who I have the honor to call my son in law not long from now. And to the marriage of my beloved, dutiful daughter-”
You found yourself looking down. Dutiful, dutiful. This was why you were here. Lottie was not dutiful and broke everything. But now here you were to fix it all. For everyone’s sakes, including yours. It would have be you thrown to face the unknown of marriage to this unknown aristocrat. Yes, he was handsome. But he was still a stranger.
“Cheers!” toasted your father.
Everyone replied with cheers as they clinked glasses. Thomas gave you another smile and clinked yours. You felt yourself become timid. His looks, his smiles, and you were acting no better than an loony adolescent.
Thomas delayed going to after-dinner sips of brandy with the other men. He remained in the parlor with the women sipping on coffee and went to you. He led you over to a corner away from nosy mamas. He spoke lowly, for you to hear.
“How are you, Miss Y/L/N?” he asked.
“If I must be entirely honest, I am afraid,” you confessed.
His eyes softened at you. They were the color of a spring sky. You had never seen eyes as blue as his.
“YN, I know this is sudden. And I’m shocked as you are. But…”
He offered his hand and you took it. Your glove over his skin. Then he placed his other over yours, and already you found yourself chilled comparing his large hand to your own. To feeling that one bit of touch. For now you were almost married, and to touch was permitted.
“You don’t have to be afraid of me…I will try to make you happy, with everything I can.” he promised.
“Nothing will happen to me. You won’t hurt me. And you won’t let anyone hurt me, will you?” you asked.
A shadow of sadness passed over his face.
“No. I won’t.”
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