#proportionate thoughts of a spider

[queen-mabs-revenge]

Why Peter Parker Was Not 15 When He Was Bit: A Treatise

This was originally a twitter thread but in an effort to save the one thing I actually care about having posted there from whatever the fuck is going on, here we go!

While early on there aren't any outright 100% indisputable references to Peter's age (i.e. himself or Aunt May just saying it outright on the page), from the very beginning of publishing, there have been enough references that give a firm grounding to Peter being a senior in high school throughout the first 28 issues of Amazing Spider-Man.

ASM 8 (Jan 1964)

Right off the bat in Amazing Spider-Man 8 (a tribute to teenagers xoxo you will always be famous) we get our first definitive mention that Peter and his classmates are in their senior year of high-school at the very least from this point on in the narrative.

ASM 14 (Jul 1964); ASM Annual 1 (Oct 1964)

Peter himself states this 6 issues later trying to wheedle Aunt May into letting him go to Hollywood on assignment from JJJ to cover Spider-Man's cinematic debut in a film role offered to him by the Green Goblin (in his first comic appearance. When I say I love the Silver Age.) ASM Annual 1 confirms that the gang is in their senior year yet again.

This is already stupid long so the rest goes behind the cut!

This isn't something that's just dropped in the Silver Age and then forgotten. 26 years after those first mentions, Web of Spider-Man Annual 4 makes a call back to Amazing Spider-Man 3 and places that moment in Peter's senior year of high-school:

Left: WOS Annual 4 (Oct 1988); Right: ASM 3 (Jul 1963)

While on tour to promote the Bugle-produced book of his Spider-Man photography, WEBS, Peter states on a TV interview that a photo of his first encounter with Doc Ock was taken while he was a senior in high school.

"But Mabs," I hear you say, "so what if he's in his senior year in ASM! Even if that's true, that doesn't mean he was in his senior year in Amazing Fantasy 15, and that still doesn't establish an age! He's a super mega genius so like....he probably skipped grades, prodigy that he is! And there was a time gap btw AF15 and ASM1, right?"

Alright let's go through this. As mentioned earlier, yeah, references to Pete's age are very few and far between and are a bit wobbly but let's put them together. The first age ref we get is in ASM 16:

ASM 16 (Sep 1964)

Here our favorite public defender is "rescued" from a mugging by the webslinger. After Peter fucks off, Matt gives us the above rundown of Spidey's characteristics: about 17, 5'10" and in excellent health. So "about 17" which, granted, doesn't have to mean exactly 17 but since we've established that at this point Peter is def in senior year, based on NYS age matriculation dates, Matt's probably spot on.

New York State matriculates students based on the age they are on December 1st of a school year. A 1976 edition of school regulations lays out the process: "[a] child who attains the age of 5 by December 1 of the current school year must be admitted to the kindergarten if a district operates such a program". So this means that within the same kindergarten class, kids born from the beginning of the school year to November 30th would be turning 5, while kids born from December 1 through the end of the school year would turn 6 during the school year, and kids born over the summer would also turn 6 but wouldn't celebrate during the school year.

Following that, Sept through Nov babies would be 16-going-on-17 in the beginning of their senior year, Dec - June would be 17-going-on-18 during senior year, June - Aug would turn 18 after graduation.

Peter being 17 or 18 during the high-school run of ASM just makes sense and there's nothing in the writing up until this point to push against that! In fact, when you first start seeing the de-aging of Peter creep in, AF15 literally had to be changed to make a younger age fit!

AF 15 (Aug 1962)

ASM Annual 23 (Sep 1989)

The very first time we see 15 floated as an age when Peter becomes Spider-Man is in the Amazing Spider-Man annual 23 of 1989. The annual is trying to present itself as Peter scientifically studying his own origin story, so the direct parallels to AF15 make it really clear when it's retconning the original to make sense with the younger age.

The panel where ASMAnn23 states Peter is 15 is otherwise a near word-for-word quote of AF15. Then later, the cognate panel of Peter in science class changes AF15's "you're sure to rate a scholarship when you graduate" to "in a couple of years when you graduate, you're sure to rate a scholarship." (Gerry Conway back at it again). This is the first time there's ever a hint at his story not being centered around his senior year, and that was made explicit in this issue by changing the original dialogue in order to justify stating he was a 15 year old in this recollection of AF15!

This is also an argument against the 'skipped grades' premise. Conway could have easily just left the text of AF15 as it was which would hint that Peter was obviously very young for being a senior in high school, but instead he tried to push AF15 back in time to fit a usual high-school timeline for a 15 year old (who would be at the earliest a December baby in their freshman year and the latest a Sept-Nov baby in sophomore year, and would be 'a couple of years' away from graduating).

Plus, fr if you're gonna argue that he skipped grades, it's on you to prove that. There are literally zero references to that throughout 616 continuity so like, why tf should it be taken as given? Please.

Anyway. And so are sown the seeds for torturing the already stretched timeline to make Peter an uwu baby infant. They didn't take right away. References to age go away after this and only resurface in 1994 (as far as I could see), where we see him aged back up:

ASM 395 (Nov 1994)

'I can't believe I was only sixteen when that spider bit me' actually makes sense with all of ASM being established as fully in Peter's senior year, Matt gauging him at 'about 17' in ASM 14, the age matriculation cut off for NYS schools, and the timeframe established between AF15 and ASM Annual 1 from 1964:

ASM Annual 1 (Oct 1964)

ASM Annual 1 (which I mentioned earlier as yet another point establishing Peter as being in his senior year) also has this little timestamp. Peter is watching Aunt May mourn for Uncle Ben and mentions that Ben's death was 'months ago'. Granted, that's in no way specific but I feel like it establishes at least a rough timeframe for the intended time gap between AF15 and ASM -- and it's not years.

And to be honest, there's really only one space in the narrative that allows for a time gap at all (Stan is really attached to his 'a few minutes later!' 'later that day!' pacing let me tell you!)

AF 15 (Aug 1962) page 9, panel 1

While the narration box says 'In the days that follow' it seems like we can take that colloquially considering the stream of newspaper headlines. For all of that to take place, I feel like it's not a massive stretch to allow this panel at the very least a month or so, which gives a bit of breathing room between when Peter lets the burglar run away and when Uncle Ben is murdered. (Which if you think about it a delayed dropping of the other shoe actually makes it worse! So how about that!). But between this and ASMAnn1, I don't think you can argue for years taking place in this gap which would have to be the case for a 15-year-old bite timeframe.

So if Peter's bit his senior year, for him to be 16 when he's bit he has to be born between the beginning of the school year and November 30th (because school has to be in session when he's bit). Which fits with the official New York City 2012 declaration of his birthday being October 14:

If he's 16 when bit in his junior year (again, school has to be in sesh), you've got to decide when from December of his junior year to the end of the school year makes sense for him to be bit with the rest of the time markers and how long you're gonna give to the time skip in AF15 for it all to qualify as just 'months' up to ASMAnn1. Which definitely can be done, especially if you AF15 pages 1-8 near the end of his jr year, put the time skip over the summer between junior and senior year, and rest of pages 9-11 in his senior year. In some ways this option makes a bit more sense, to be honest!

The way I personally like to square it is to go with all of AF15 and ASM1-28 happening in Peter's senior year (which he reaches without skipping grades) interpreting the 'when you graduate' in the AF15 panel referring to the same school year. If he's 16, the bite happens sometime before his birthday which has to be before Nov. 30th and, sure, why not Oct 14 -- it fits. A month or so passes between when he gets bit and starts his show-biz stint, and when Ben gets murdered. That means the last 3 pages of AF15 (bar the first panel on pg 9) to ASM28 spans from some time in December of his senior year to the end of the school year.

(If you don't care if he was 16 or 17 when he was bit, AF15 - ASM28 can take place any time from the second half-ish of his junior year to the end of his senior year, you can decide how many 'months' the time skip is in AF15, pick his birthday out of a hat, and Matt's "about 17" could mean 18, too. Have a ball.)

But in any case whichever way you choose to spin it, this shit is dumb and wrong:

Civil War 2 (Aug 2006)

and especially deserves to be memory holed for the ridiculous de-aging of Peter Parker that has subsequently been pushed into popular memory and continues throughout current Marvel 'brand synergy'. Sad and bad!

[typicalchaos]

Slashers Reacting to Their S/O Asking Them to Kill a Spider But it’s an Okinawa Banana Spider

A/N- Hai friends! So as someone who grew up in Oki Ima tell you those fuckers are BIG and they really do be looking like some shit from Alien.

This first started as a “oh slashers s/o being scared of an itty bitty spider lol” then I thought back to my childhood and remembered why my fear of spiders is so fucking fair. (Was biking at like age 6 and looked up to be greeted by one of them SoBs chilling in a size proportionate web-PERFECTLY ABOVE THE SIDEWALK MIND YOU)

Also ik they’d never rly encounter one cause they ain’t in Japan but idgaf and this is funny so they all moved to Okinawa for this one lol

So I wrote this!!- thank you for listening to my tedtalk!

Slashers: Billy Lenz, Brahms Heelshire, Jason Voorhees, Billy & Stu, Bo Sinclair

Warnings: All I can think of is profanity lmao- enjoy!!

Billy Lenz

• Will kill anyone and anything for you, so does so no questions asked immediately.

• Basically- “BILLY KILL IT!!” *bang* “oh shit was that a toaster?”

• Will probably keep the corpse to your dismay, probably thinking it’s the coolest looking bug he’s ever seen. I really couldn’t see him being scared of it.

Brahms Heelshire

• Living in the walls you get used to all kinds of creepy crawlies, and Brahms also had a soft spot for spiders, feeling solace in the fact that people fear and despise them even though they benefit society, hated for their appearance and nature. (They also helped with particularly nasty bugs-great bonus).

• So whenever you would cry or yell in fear, Brahms would gently and calmly capture any normal lil guy and lovingly place it outside or in the walls away from you.

•That being said, Brahms ran away screaming the second he laid eyes on the monstrosity.

• He’s down for getting the small-even cute spiders for you, but fuuuck that.

• Eventually he’ll grab a fire poker and stab it before running away crying with you in tow, also crying- it kept twitching!! (ಥ﹏ಥ)

• You’ll probably have to take care of the body cause no way is he going near it- he will however vehemently demand you throw that sucker in the fireplace.

Jason Voorhees

• Growing up in the wilderness Jason has made peace with nature as a whole, has even come face to face with a bear- but what the heck is that!?

• Genuinely thinks it’s some kind of hell creature of alien with how freaky it looks, half wondering if his mother’s voodoo has something to do with it for a sec.

• Freaked out, but he’s not going to fail his beloved. Simply stabbing it with his trusty machete he’s quick to dispose of it, though keeping it at arms length-just in case.

Billy & Stu

• Extremely smug and obnoxious at first when they hear you crying for them, but are quickly humbled when they look up at the ceiling corner.

• Stu starts babbling, “Yooo the fuck is that? It’s like a freaking face hugger!!”

• Billy refuses to take his eyes off of it, and you wonder if he’s worried if he does it’ll pounce at him.

• Stu makes a suggestion to just shoot it, but Billy makes the logical decision to grab a broom and swat at the damn thing.

• Backfired immediately when it fell to the floor and started tweeking out.

• Billy, ever the problem solver, would proceed to smack the ever loving shit out of the thing while Stu hoops and hollers while jumping away.

• Once it’s dead Stu picks it up and starts waving it around before Billy smacks him with the broom.

Bo Sinclair

• “It’s just a damn spid-WHAT IN THE HELL!?”

• Would genuinely consider shooting it, bugs should not be allowed to get so big.

• Might actually shoot it depending on where it is; say it’s hanging in a web in a tree bud’s gonna use the mofo as target practice.

• If it somehow got inside he’d just probably grab the bat and swing at it.

• Would never admit it freaked him out- “Just got surprised it was so damn big’.” Mmhmm (｡ˇ艸ˇ)

[natalievoncatte]

Lena watched their new visitor as she, in turn, watched the bier that lay beneath the healing power of the Purple Ray. It had been almost a full day and while she was breathing shallow breaths, Lena’s counterpart on the table was still not awake.

The cyborg stood just outside the perimeter of the beam, as still as a statue, just watching. At various times Kara, Nia, Alex, and Diana herself had all taken up silent watch next to her, along with the honor guard of Amazonian warriors.

Lena looked at… herself. Her doppleganger tapped the name tag on her leather jacket.

“It’s easier if you just call me by my number- 938. That’s how we keep track of each other.”

Lena nodded. “Others?”

“The other Lenas. There’s about fifty on the ship right now, the core membership. There’s about three hundred of us in total. We’re the ones who can’t, or won’t, go home.”

“I see,” said Lena. “Why can’t you go back?”

938 looked at her. “It’s not a fun story.”

“I’m listening.”

“Let me show you something.”

She held out her wrist. There was a piece of tech on her arm, like a bulky smart watch. When she activated it, a three dimensional holographic display appeared above the smooth surface. 938 pointed out the branches of what looked like a huge tree.

“The multiverse is much larger than you can imagine. I’ve spent some time charting a small section of it. See this branch?” she indicated one with a sweep of her finger. “This the reality cluster I come from. Our worlds are different from yours. I believe it’s because the divergence point, where the two universes split on a quantum continuity level, is further back in history. I think some of the changes can go all the way back to the Big Bang.”

“There’s so many,” said Lena.

998 nodded. “There are. There are worlds like yours, but many others like mine. We have no protectors. No Kryptonians. No Lanterns. There are worlds out there where no one has powers at all.”

“But not yours,” said Lena.

938 turned off the device, and turned away from the scene behind them. “For me it started with a lab accident. A genetically modified spider was irradiated and bit me before it died. It’d escaped from an enclosure in another lab and got zapped by my own experiment. I was sick for three days. When I came out of it, I had the proportionate strength, speed, and agility of an arachnid, plus a precognitive danger sense and spinarettes in my wrists.”

“You became a superhero?”

“Yes,” said 938. “For all the good it did. I fought the good fight for a few years and eventually ran afoul of a new gang in town. The problem was that it was led by my own brother.”

“Lex,” Lena spat.

“He’d experimented on himself. Used an unstable steroid. It drove him utterly insane and he started wearing a goblin costume and flying around on a rocket powered glider.”

“Oh God,” said Lena.

“My universe doesn’t have a Krypton. My Kara was human, only human, and I loved her with all my heart. I couldn’t breathe without her. She was my everything. I tried to keep her safe, so I kept my identity and my feelings from her, but it didn’t matter. Lex knew. He abducted her and threw her off the George Washington Bridge.”

938 looked away. “I thought I had her. I tried to use my webs to catch her but I didn’t think and the shock… I’m the one who killed her really. The sudden stop snapped her neck.”

Lena stared at her.

“I’m so sorry.”

938 shook her head. “I fought Lex after that. I was in a rage. I killed him in front of thousands of witnesses. I broke his neck, almost twisted his head off. It didn’t matter. She was still gone, and nothing would ever fill that void. I hung up my costume and turned back to science, trying to build something meaningful in Kara’s name, but no matter how many labs and fellowships I named after her it was never enough. That was how I stumbled across the multiverse, working on a portal device in my lab.”

“You found yourself, I take it. Or ourself.”

“No. I found another Kara, and in a world with no Lena. She was alone. I crossed over with some of my tech, never planning to go back. Then I realized, that woman wasn’t her. All I could ever be to her was someone grooming her to be a dead woman from another world. I despaired for a while, jumping from ‘verse to ‘verse, trying to find some reason to keep going.”

“What did you find?” said Lena.

“Lena 1467, the Sorcerer Supreme of her Earth. She’d lost her Kara too, in a car accident when they were med students. That was when the League of Lenas got going. We found more of us, started assembling a team.”

“To do what?”

998 looked at the cyborg. “Fix it. Save her.” She sighed. “Our main mission is to help out and protect as many Karas as we can, but also to protect the multiverse from rogue Karas or rogue Lenas that might breach the barriers between universes.”

“I’m assuming that’s to prevent wars between timelines.”

938 shook her heads. “No. Not long after I started traveling I had… an experience. I only vaguely remember it but there were these yellow aliens and they told me that we had to protect the branches from each other so that some kind of corruption won’t reach what they called the ‘core world’ or the ‘Ab-Juda-Earth.’ The multiverse needs superheroes. We have to exist to keep it alive.”

“So you’re here to help the cyborg?”

“Both of them.”

“You know,” said Lena. “The cyborg Kara mentioned something about yellow aliens when I first met her, but I didn’t think to ask-“

“She’s awake!” The cyborg was saying. “She’s awake, let me see her!”

Lena turned and found both her Kara and Diana holding the cyborg back.

“Shut off the Ray,” Diana commanded.

Once it was off, the pair released the cyborg. She lunged across the space, limping as her metal foot clacked on the floor, slowing as she reached the bier.

“Kara?”

Lena watched, 998 standing next to her. The cyborg kept her distance, suddenly apprehensive. The other Lena slowly sat up, finally prompting the cyborg to move.

“Lena?” she rasped.

The other Lena- thinner, visibly older with strands of gray shot through her hair, smiled and cupped the fleshy side of Kara’s face with her hand.

“You found me.”

“I found you. My love. My zhao. My red sunrise. I found you.”

“It’s going to be alright, baby,” said the other Lena. “I can fix you up. I’ll make you better.”

The cyborg took a deep, rasping breath, closed her eyes, and collapsed to the floor in a boneless heap.

“Move!” 938 shouted. “We don’t have time, we have to help her now. Princess, I need to jump my ship into your airspace. Please.”

“Who are you? What’s happening?” the other Lena demanded.

“Trust us, please,” said Lena. “You’re among friends here and we want to help you.”

938 was speaking into her watch.

“I need you now, hurry.”

Outside, a booming shockwave sent a blast of air through the open, airy temple, almost gusting Lena off her feet. Her Kara steadied her, then lifted her cyborg counterpart gently in her arms.

“Get her aboard my ship,” said 998.

[hoardlikegoldenirises]

finally finished this 🌟 radiantsona?? i just thought it would be fun to do, and also play with colors other than the "official" ones 💜

some closeups

when i was picking eye shape i actually picked this shape because of. eyebrows. lmao. so they probably don't widen much.

also my chronic resting bitch face.

blurple

i considered teal, because i like turquoise as well (also pink but, that's taken), but i decided a neon purple would fit best with stealth powers.

stealthy... cloaking... honestly this power set is basically just "big time spider-man but radiant" lol

long and narrow... i have proportionally broad shoulders, so, you know. also a flat ass.

colors is proving a pain but like

It's meant to be definitely blurple, not purple, but it looks really blue on my computer and really purple on my phone so I'm like ???? idk.

[lara635kookie]

I didn't even watch "WISH" yet because in my country it will only be available at january, but people are saying it's a bad cliche so I probably won't watch at the cinema.

The thing is, even though I am a hopeless romantic, not everything has to have romance. There are princess who are perfectly fine without a prince, like Mirabel, Elsa, Merida, Moana and Raya(I do kinda like the idea of Raya with a girl, just not Namaari). But we were so robbed of seeing Asha and the star boy(he is literally a staR so I don't doubt Disney would call him StaN or something like that, so his name is Stan from now on, I am gonna call him like that, is easier than star boy). Asha and Stan had the potential to be the next Tianaveen and Rapunzel&Eugene (I don't know their ship name). The concept arts are the cutest thing I have ever seen. Also "At All Costs" (bop) would have been a love song between the two!!! Them singing it man. The pain I will feel when I don't see them passionately sing it, very "I see the light" coded, in the actual movie. Somehow, now is not feminist for a strong female character to have a male partner by her side. Like...This doesn't make sense! You can be a strong female character and have a man at the same time! Have y'all forgotten Mulan and Shang? Anna and Kristoff? Ariel and Eric? Jasmine and Aladdin? (There are more examples and I could go on all day, but you got what I meant already) I hate Disney for throwing good ideas at the trash and playing safe just for money(like Hobie Brown/Spider-Punk said "it's a metaphor for capitalism"). And as the guy looked blonde with blue/green eyes in the arts I have seen, and Asha is a black latina, they lost the opportunity of having a biracial couple ACTUALLY DONE RIGHT (Pocahontas and John Smith don't count, he is a collonizer with the most common name in the world, she deserves so much better). Like, if the thing is show how inclusive you are by having a black latina female protagonist for little girls to see and feel represented in a good way, you could have increased that feeling by making someone fall in love for her. Little girls would feel like they are beautiful and desired/desireable in a positive way and that they worthy of being loved and love and be with whoever they want to be with, even someone who has a different skin color.

I am also mad because we could have seen Disney's first evil villain COUPLE with King Magnifico and his wife, the queen(still don't know her name, sorry). Can't you guys imagine the HITS, THE FIRST PLACE OF BILLBOARD HOT 100 WORTHY songs, they would proportionate us? Even if only one song, it would be enough for me. But someone thought having a female villain would be anti-feminist and they discarded an original and authentic idea, which is what Disney built its empire on the first place. Come on Disney minorities don't want to be portrayed as those unrealistic superior beings, they want to be portrayed as real human beings with emotions, struggles, qualities and flaws. Having an iconic female villain like you guys always had(like Maleficent, Cruella De Vil, Ursula, Mother Gothel, Lady Tremaine, etc) and set her up with an iconic male villain(like Gaston, Doctor Facilier, Shan Yu, Jafar, Hans, etc) it would have been top notch, god tier. King Magnifico and the queen could have been like the Gomez and Morticia of evil. You could address so many topics by it. Like the kingdom being ruled by evil would have been a great social critic of some politicians out there, for example. And we could have had an iconic final boss battle between Asha and Stan VS Magnifico and the queen.

Anyway, what I mean by this is that if someone has fanarts or just ANY CONTENT, of Asha and Stan, tag me, reblog this or comment, I don't care, just warn me, because they are my new obsession. I will also write a fanfic about this movie with these ideas, but only after I have watched the movie so until them, please feed my hyperfixation in Stasha (Star boy/Stan×Asha), I'm begging y'all

[lovemybluebully]

I feel like Wade is definetly the type to just randomly pounce on Logan for no particular reason. Just whenever the fancy strikes him, sometimes he gets ideas on new ways to torment him that he files away for later but it's definetly mostly spur of the moment with him. But he would retroactively give reasons as to why for teasing purposes. Like "oh you just looked so cute i just had to eat you up" or "you were all frowny and I just can't have my honey badger getting any more wrinkles" and while they are always true they are rarely the actual reason because Wade wasn't thinking so much as just impulsively jumping on him with not a thought in his head other than 'get his ass' and even then he's already in motion before it registers.

Logan likes to plot, whether it's in retribution for something or just in response to Wade being annoying. He needs a way to justify it, an excuse or reason,(which Wade provides no shortage of) and that usually means he has an idea of what he wants to do beforehand, the response needs to be proportionate after all. Being annoying in general is a minor offense but a very easy and always available opportunity. As is getting him to shut up, but he has to act quite annoyed since Wade needs to be laughing too hard to speak for it to work. If its in revenge for Wade doing something particularly evil or just new in general tickling wise, he copies what Wade did exactly, sometimes even waiting for the same opportunity Wade took to fully recreate it.

-spider anon 🕷

Me reading this:

Some Spider Anon 🕷 goodness to brighten your day. 🥰

[un-pearable]

post-spider-man and his amazing friends “a fire-star is born” thoughts: why is iceman the punny one. hi fred scooby doo. incredible levels of wolverine uselessness here. firestar i do think dropping your high school rivals twenty feet into mud is not proportionate to the extremely basic drama they roped you into . MAGNET-O?????

[purityvalentine]

I thought you hated spiders?

depends on the spider!

i don't like spindly spiders and house spiders

but i like tarantulas.

if they have proportionally fat legs i like them more

i also like jumping spiders to some extent

i still wouldnt want them wandering around my house wild but i would keep a pet tarantula

[radiantmorningstar]

Advanced Fighting Fantasy: Tobrin's Chronicle 3

Year 297 AC of the Deer, Seaday 19th of the Month of Hiding

Tobrin wants to put a sizeable distance between him and the elvish picket riders around the village. [Consider this a “forced march” of the sort described in AFF Core Rulebook, 200-201.] He’s able to move two hexes north (instead of one) to the Sulla River, which runs from the massive spring in the center of Redianteris, past Skyhand, and then east to empty in Plentiful Bay. [Make a Stamina check: 2d6 roll = 8, success.] Upon reaching the river, Tobrin is tired and cannot make another forced march for 24 hours; however, he is not incapacitated from his efforts.

A cool breeze comes off Plentiful Bay and waves crack against the cliffs, sending foam high into the air. The sound of the crashing waves and the cries of gulls are nearly constant as the water of the Bay stretches along the eastern horizon. Before him, the Sulla River thrashes over the falls to empty into the water 100 feet (about 30 meters) below. There is no visible bridge or natural way evident that would allow Tobrin to cross the river without getting wet or risking the strong current.

[Roll chance of encounter, 1-2 on 1d6, roll = 6, no encounter.] The Sulla River is deep and Tobrin doesn’t find any crossing points, no matter how carefully he surveys the terrain. But he feels like he won’t be safe from the elf patrols unless he gets to the other side. [Does he try to swim across? Roll: 5, 4 = Yes and {scarce, measure, behave}].

He tries to swim across. [Make a check against skill+swim to see if he can calculate the uncommon proportionality of the river at this location and account for the strength of the current. Roll is 2d6 vs. 10-2 = 10, failure.] Unfortunately, halfway across the river, Tobrin gets caught in the current and is carried over the falls into the Bay. He takes zero damage, since the fall is less than 50 meters into deep water and loses no possessions.

He’s able to swim to an outcropping of cliff rocks and, after catching his breath, notices a steep path that twists up to a cave mouth in the cliff face. Inside, he discovers a hollow cavern containing rough-hewn statues of the Seven Gods of Evil: Slangg, Death, Disease, Decay, Arhallogen, Hmurresh, and Tanit. It looks like this is a small hidden shrine, but also like it hasn’t been used in a long time.

[Does he decide to search the shrine? Roll: 3, 1 = Yes but {late, expand, memory}]. He decides to search the shrine and, in so doing, recognizes the placement of the statues as a tradition from the Order of the Omega, a cult of demonolators, who have lately come into power back in Nemea. [Roll 2d6 under Skill to search, but add World Lore and Religion Lore: Nemea, general for a 6+2 = 8 target. Roll: 11, failure.] Tobrin finds nothing of value in the shrine except dusty clay offering bowls at the feet of the statues, full of what look like dried rose petals and dead spiders.

He finds a narrow stair made from cliff rocks and takes it back up to the top, on the other side of the river. Tobrin spends the rest of the day in thoughtful reading of his grimoire, sitting with his back to a lone cypress tree jutting over the edge of the cliff. He makes a fireless camp that evening and falls asleep to the rhythmic sound of the waves.

[zaptap]

it's been over a year since atsv came out... which also means it's been over a year since i started reading spider-man comics (well. spider-people comics, since i'm reading about the other ones too)

just made it to 2008--or, in other words, i just read one more day. wow that really was bad huh. you could really tell nobody involved in writing the comics at the time wanted to do that. literally every character telling peter he should let aunt may die. madam web helps him get in contact with may's spirit and even she says to let her die

but noooo, the editorial people are like we can't have peter parker married to a supermodel anymore because kids can't relate to it enough. he needs to go back to being just a normal guy, with the proportionate strength and agility of a spider, who is also single just like our target audience. also we can't simply make him divorced because that would age him too much so we'll have him make a deal with mephisto that retcons his 20-years-of-comics marriage out of existence to save his aunt who probably should have stayed dead after she died in the clone saga. even though we decided using mephisto to end the clone saga wouldn't fit for a spider-man story we're still going to use him here

anyway from what i hear spider-man comics might not ever have been good since this point? at least the ones about peter parker. only a few more years until miles shows up (and i'll get to pick up ultimate spider-man again, after reading up until just after peter died a year ago and deciding to give 616 another shot), and then a few years after that spider-verse will introduce spider-gwen

and the jms run was pretty good, as i'd heard. despite one more day, despite sins past (apparently they retconned that one recently thank god. literally the entire time i read it im like what the FUCK were they thinking who thought this was even remotely a good idea). though these years were still somewhat annoying to get through because i didn't like the secondary spider-titles much

[labwebs]

As someone who'd been solidly on the outside of 'high school tradition' even before getting powers, it honestly wasn't a huge surprise that he'd missed that. Even when he'd been part of the yearbook, he'd left the action shots and sports coverage to others. To be honest, if she hadn't mentioned it before, Peter wouldn't have even known that MJ had been a cheerleader at the high school they'd both gone to. It'd been a world way outside of his own at the time.

He was glad that their worlds had merged now, though.

"Oh. That." Peter cringed, shuffling his feet uncomfortably and somewhat wishing he hadn't already finished the dishes so he'd have something to do with his hands while he explained his end of that particular memory. "That was like... two days? about? after I got bit by that spider. I dunno what I was thinking- just that he'd- he'd hit me the week before and I wanted to get even 'cause I could after that but I wasn't gonna hit him." He paused for a moment, considering as his face scrunched up. "Probably for the best, considering what I did to the backboard."

He hadn't thought about that day in years. It'd been so different even back then in the very early days. Sure, he was used to it now and mostly did it without thinking but it'd taken a lot of figuring out how much of his proportionate strength it took to do everyday tasks without, say, pulling a towel rack out of the wall or something like that.

"I mean realistically I know it wasn't that long ago but... man that feels like a different lifetime these days."

"You never asked, Tiger..." MJ shrugged, as if she might just leave it there without explaining any further. Truth be told, neither one of them had done a lot of digging into the ex files. Sure, she knew quite a bit about Gwen and the horrible cascade of events that had led to her death. But even when her friend had been alive, MJ hadn't asked a lot of questions about Gwen's relationship with Peter ... and she'd asked even fewer of him.

It wasn't that she didn't care, of course she did. MJ just didn't think knowing any details was a good idea - after all, it had nothing to do with her. It was something that belonged to Peter and the ghost of her friend, and she'd only cause all three of them pain by inserting herself where she didn't belong.

Her thing with Flash, on the other hand? Didn't need such protections.

"We had a fling, it was nothing serious." MJ finally elaborated, looking almost bored as she did. "Felt almost like we had to at some point, you know? Star football player and the cheer captain, high school tradition and all that. He was ... he was different, after you embarrassed him in the gym. Kinda shook the proverbial ground under his feet, I guess. Maybe for the better, if what May heard is true."

@labwebs

[asfateentertwines]

The Surprise

Okay so trans pregnancy Spider won my poll - thank you to the one person who told me who should carry lmfao - but it was a close tie. Consider this canon to the little universe but I think I'll try to write the incubator baby headcanons too cause it was really frickin close lmao

TW: Trans pregnancy, mentions of sex, medical stuff

So Ningni was not planned to say the least

Penetrative sex for Spider and Rotxo is...a process to say the least

Rotxo is double Spider's size and lets just say biology is proportionate. Hence, the build up is nothing to rush through and with three kids, it's a luxury they don't get often

Plus, with their differing biology, they never really paid mind to reproduction between them

Sure it was theoretically possible but they didn't linger on it all so much

Rotxo may have thought about a baby of their own biology but it was too much a health risk and he was never sure how Spider would do. He didn't ask, wouldn't, but...maybe he dreamed sometimes

That said...maybe protection wasn't always at the forefront of their minds

Spider finds out he's pregnant after Kiri starts getting an odd sense around him, she eventually visits the ancestors for advice and is informed their brother needs to see a Tsahik immediately

They bring Spider to Tsireya first, not wanting to alert anyone with how precarious the situation might be, and she is the one who affirms Kiri's information

It scares the shit out of him

Tsireya and Kiri keep the information quiet but they won't for long - namely for his own health

Abortion isn't really a thing in Na'vi culture - mating is for life, something that means even unplanned pregnancy or teenage mishaps are between a mated pair. Medical intervention occurs but an unwanted pregnancy is nearly unheard of

Children are a blessing from Ewya - while unplanned or untimely pregnancies may happen, it's not often and it's not like it is on earth. One doesn't have to leave everything behind to be a parent.

Still - come hell or high water, no one will take the choice from Spider

Tsireya takes Anea and the boys that night, Spider pulling Rotxo into the water for a late night ride to tell him

Honestly, Rotxo didn't predict shit, homie got blindsided

Spider cries, a mixture of terrified, hopeful, and sick all coiling in his throat, and tells Rotxo that they might have messed up

He tells him of Kiri's odd feelings, how a woman Kiri didn't know told her that he was blessed, that the next generation is growing, and how Tsireya confirmed he was with child.

Rotxo is thrilled but guiltily so, terrified for what it could mean for Spider and for their family.

It's a long talk about whether or not they have a choice here - Spider hasn't even told Norm or been formally checked out - but they opt that, if it can be done safely, Spider will carry the pregnancy to term

It's not an easy decision - Spider wants the baby, at least, he thinks he does, but carrying the child to term could be a painful experience, dangerous to his body but also his mind. Growing up with intersex being the standard meant that pregnancy wasn't a female thing, but he's human, and he knows the difference

the dysphoria of the coming months will be harsh and he knows it'll bother the limited medical transitions he's been able to make

With Norms help, he's more androgynous than anything by human standards and he's been able to become comfortable in himself - pregnancy will send it reeling back

Then, there's the side of how painful and dangerous a pregnancy might become

He knows how different his body is and he knows that this won't be easy

But...Ewya blessed him

It's what he's wanted his whole life and he won't give it up now

Rotxo will be at his side and so he decides to do it

His pregnancy is the scientific question of the ages that Norm thought he discovered each time one of the Sully kids walked in his lab, but an organic Na'vi and human child is more than a little unexpected

The baby is studied closely, the growth an alarming thing when na'vi size is taken into consideration. Afterall, a newborn Neteyam was about the same size as a one year old Spider

Unfortunately for Spider, this means a good six months of bed rest

Fortunately for him, he has three very excited children

Anea tries to find out everything she can about his pregnancy. Given he has to spend it's duration in the hut, she spends most of her time with him where they can both breathe and she can help

She becomes his little helper - gathering supplies so they can prepare things for the baby, getting him food, books, and entertainment, and helping him get around as the pregnancy continues and movement gets difficult

Wialik patrols the hut, much to Rotxo's amusement, and tries to protect his uncle and sisters. From what, he couldn't say, but Rotxo finds it insanely amusing

Wialik also ends up collecting pieces to make beads, working with surprising patience to start their newest additions songcord with his family. He enlists Astayì, Kiri's oldest, and makes little figures like a child born in the Ash clans would receive. He claims it's to help his knife skills but they all know better

Vipeì writes stories and lullabies for the baby

He's little, only about 6, so Tsireya and Neteyam help him with learning songs and teach him stories to tell

He works with Rotxo too to make clothes, both for Spider and the baby

This being the first baby they had real time to prepare for, Rotxo goes a bit overboard in getting things together

He and Vipeì make Spider clothes to help conceal his chest and make new shawls that knit over his shoulders

They also make a frankly obscene amount of baby clothes and blankets, anything that a human-Na'vi child may need - a bed for the marui and one for the hut, clothes for any sort of temperature intolerance, and toys galore

By 6 months in, Spider is bedbound entirely. He's sick, drained, and craving things he can't even eat. His body is beyond heavy and he relies a lot on his family to help him - it's a lot of time spent with his brothers teasing, Tuk's mischief, Kiri's support, and even Neytiri and Jakes care.

Norm monitors him constantly in the last few months before it's decided that intervention is needed - he'll be in serious danger if they let him continue.

Ningni is born 8 months into Spiders pregnancy, something that was a risky decision on all sides. Quite simply, she was too big for him to carry much longer and her needs were difficult to predict when her species wasn't even something they could guarantee

She's a pale blue, appearing a few shades lighter than Rotxo (something her brothers claim comes from them) with tiny blonde curls. Her hair is starkly human, something Spider fears and Rotxo loves. She combines them in the face in a way they're both proud of, but her eyes are big and brown and neither of their own. Paz had to leave her mark somehow

Ningni is tiny for a Na'vi but frankly appallingly large for human standards

Spider is on bedrest for several months and then on limited action after, but Ningni is thankfully born able to breathe both human and Pandoran air

She's clearly blessed and accepted easier than her family thought she'd be (though most of the clan hopes she's the only of her kind)

Her lungs can breathe both her parents air, her body tolerates food of both cultures, she has the extra fingers of humans, the enhances sense of Na'vi, and the flexibility of humans. Her strength is a bit lesser than a true blooded Na'vi, but she's astonishingly well adapted

As she grows, she's sort of an oddball like her Auntie Kiri was

She's in tune with the world around her but rambunctious and mischievous like both her fathers

She's a bit of a jack of all trades - choosing to do everything and nothing all at once

She's the type of kid that need constant supervision and both Jake and Norm smugly say she is much alike Spider was as a child

Due to Spider being with her near constantly in her younger years, she's very close to him but Rotxo is - very proudly - her hero

[meant-to-be-a-hero]

Current List Of (St)Eddie Fics

Swing My Way - 45/45 - (Steve x Eddie)

Steve Harrington can't turn down a friend in need, so when Nancy Wheeler asks for help breaking into a secret BrenCorp lab, he has no choice but to say yes.

Eddie Munson is BrenCorp’s newest security guard, but as much as he wants to do a good job, he can’t say no to a pretty face. Especially when he’s thought Steve has a pretty face for years.

The Strange Energy Research Lab Eddie is guarding is full of mysteries, and when a hasty exit exposes he and Steve to two of them, their lives are irrevocably changed.

Steve starts literally climbing the walls, with the proportionate strength and speed of a spider and a sixth sense that keeps him safe from danger, while Eddie finds himself sharing his body with an interdimensional creature that can form around him like a second skin.

Adopting the identities of Spider-Man and Venom, the pair set out to unravel BrenCorp's secrets while its shady CEO arrays his dark forces against them to reclaim what he believes is his.

And amidst the chaos of their new superheroic lives, Steve and Eddie find themselves growing closer. Their secrets may at first keep them apart, but they may also be what ultimately draws them together.

A Pack Of Two - 32/32 - (Steve x Eddie)

Legends say that broken hearts will be mended if you spend the night of the full moon atop Heartbreak Hill. When Steve Harrington’s girlfriend dumps him, that sounds like the perfect way to fix his broken heart.

But the following day, Steve’s body starts to change. His senses kick into overdrive, and fangs and claws start appearing where fangs and claws absolutely should not be. The only person who can help him through his newfound transformation is the mysterious Eddie Munson.

As Eddie helps Steve re-take control of his body, Steve also starts to take control of his life. He's tired of living the way other people expect him to – and he's done doing things that don't make him happy. And, as he finds out, Eddie makes him very happy indeed.

With time ticking down to the next full moon, Steve must find a way to master his new abilities, navigate his way through a potential relationship with his werewolf mentor, and perhaps realise that the true enemies aren’t always the ones in front of us.

 Or, Steve Harrington and the month that changes his life forever.

His World Inverted - 22/22 (Steve x Eddie)

The Kingdom Of Hawkins has been at peace since the end of the Inverse War, in which Sir Steve of the Harringtons and his companions defeated the Dark Lord Vecna forever.

Now, Steve has returned to Hawkins and resumed his age-old quest – trying to find a girlfriend. But why is finding someone so much harder than fighting monsters ever was?

When a new quest arises, sending Steve, Nancy, and Robin out into the kingdom to try and rescue their missing friends, a familiar face reappears – Eddie Munson, who Steve and the others had thought lost during the War. But Eddie's different now – Inverted, possessing a strange, warped appearance and new abilities. And just as Steve and the others begin to adjust to their friend's return, tragedy strikes.

Now, with his senses, his body, his very mind warped and changed, Steve must contend with his new state of being even while the fate of the kingdom still rests on his shoulders.

Will Steve and his companions be able to save the kingdom, and their friends? And in the process, will Steve be able to complete his other quest, and find someone who sees him for who he truly is?

Love & Monsters - 31/31 (Steve x Eddie)

Vecna is gone, destroyed in a final confrontation between his forces of darkness and the protectors of Hawkins. But his final act of revenge has unleashed a multitude of monsters across the country, all pulled from the collective unconscious.

Now, it's up to Steve, Eddie, and their friends to head out and take all of these creatures down.

As they face off against myths and legends made real, monsters from movies and their deepest, darkest fears, Eddie and Steve will learn about themselves, about their relationship, and the true depths of their feelings for one another.

Can they clean up Vecna's final mess and make it home in one piece? And what will their relationship look like when they return?

Little Bites Of Happiness - 15/15 (Steve x Eddie)

Vecna has been defeated, and Hawkins is safe once again. The battle is over, and the danger has passed at last. There’s just one problem: Eddie Munson is still dead, and for Steve Harrington, that’s unacceptable.

Steve’s not sure why he cares so much. What he does know is that he has to bring Eddie back, no matter the cost.

And hey, if psychic powers and other dimensions exist, then surely magic isn’t far behind?

But what he and Robin bring back isn’t Eddie. At least, not entirely. It’s something darker, something deadlier, and something hungry.

With Robin at his side, Steve sets out to rescue Eddie and purge the darkness that has tainted his resurrection. But to do that, Steve might have to face his own secrets, and finally come to terms with feelings he has long been denying.

[Set after the events of Stranger Things Season 4, with vague allusions to some version of Season 5]

The Music's No Good Without You - 14/14 (Eddie x Reader)

Leaving Hawkins to chase your dreams in New York feels like the best decision you’ve ever made. At least until you get there, and realise that chasing your dreams is actually a lot harder than you thought it’d be. Feeling creatively suffocated, you decide to join a band so that you’ve got somewhere to sing when the rest of the city seems to want you to do anything but.

The band in question however turns out to be made up of very familiar faces – Steve Harrington, Nancy Wheeler, Robin Buckley and...Eddie Munson, the man you’ve had a crush on since high school. There’s only one problem: Eddie doesn’t date – he’s too focused on achieving his dream of superstardom for that. But maybe you can show him that achieving his dream doesn’t have to mean closing off his heart in the process.

It’s not going to be easy, especially when an old flame returns to make your life, and the lives of your bandmates, miserable. Together though, you can overcome anything. You’ll win Eddie’s heart, and achieve both of your dreams, no matter what it takes.

[Rock Band AU - doesn't reference the events of the show]

Come Back To Me - 12/12 (Eddie x Reader)

You’ve had about enough of Hawkins. Between the disappearances, the murders, and now an earthquake, it’s about time for you to relocate to some place a little safer. But those plans fall apart, literally, when you find yourself plummeting through a fissure in the ground and into a hellish dimension beyond.

Trapped in a terrifying reflection of Hawkins and stalked by dangerous creatures, things take a turn for the worse when Eddie Munson makes the scene. As you spend time with Eddie though, you come to realise that perhaps you shouldn’t believe everything you’ve heard on the news about him. Logic and reason have always been your go-to, but when it comes to Eddie, maybe this time you’ll have to think with your heart instead of your head. If you don’t lose them both first.

As the shadow of Vecna threatens to drown Eddie in darkness, the pair of you fight to uncover the secret behind his resurrection so that you can both forge a path out of the Upside Down and back to the surface. And maybe, you might just forge something else along the way. A bond strong enough that even Vecna’s evil can’t break it. A bond of friendship, and maybe even...love.

[Set after the events of Stranger Things Season 4]

Go Your Own Way - 10/10 (Eddie x Reader)

After a year of tragedy you didn't think you'd ever smile again until you joined the Hawkins High Hellfire Club. The fact that Eddie Munson, your Dungeon Master, is perhaps the hottest person you've ever met doesn't hurt matters, either. When you're around him, things feel bright again, and you begin to feel as though your life might finally be getting back on track.

But when Eddie finds himself at the centre of a police investigation, you're drawn into a mysterious conspiracy involving otherworldly monsters, dark alternate dimensions, and a terrifying curse. It'll take everything you have, as well as the assistance of the most unlikely of allies, to clear Eddie's name and save the entire world (and yourself!) from the demon known as Vecna.

And then there's the matter of your heart. With the world going insane around you, the only thing that doesn't seem in question are your feelings for Eddie. Is it even possible that he might feel the same way about you, or is your love life destined to be a critical fail?

[Set during the events of Stranger Things Season 4]

[spookyscarycreepydollgirl]

Warning: The following snippet contains; Minor mentions of blood and gore, some body horror, lots of arachnophobia triggers. Size difference. A shady fae creature on their best behaviour. Unspecified bargains with said shady fae creature. Some very dead monsters.

The face was familiar, though the size of it was not, nor was the number of eyes, the chelicerae protruding from his jawline, the sharpness of his canines or the number of arms. Speaking of his arms and indeed his limbs in general not only were they larger but proportionately they had elongated to the border of grotesque but merely the border as if Bastion were fighting to maintain some semblance of the illusion of humanity in her presence. That illusion was already well and truly lost, because the being before her was not merely huge and grotesquely proportioned but it’s movements were more like a spider than a man.

“Do not run Ida.” The creature cautioned, in that all too familiar, ever gentle voice, albeit this time with the disturbing addition of distorted reverberations, as though the same voice were overlapping with itself, just slightly out of sync and speaking at both higher and lower frequencies at intervals.

“If you run, I will most definitely chase you and I fear even with our agreement, I will not be able to control myself”

“Are you going to eat me Bastion?” She asked carefully, after all, when dealing with inhumanity, it never hurt to clarify, for all she knew he was simply warning her away from a more painful death, not warning her away from the prospect of death in its entirety, in which case, she was in fact going to have to run.

He laughed and despite the distortion there was something quite deprecating about it. “As much as I would love to, in this particular instance I am in fact trying to behave myself, come here Ida.”

Naturally she stayed where she was. He huffed at her. “Yes I realise it seems counterproductive, but please come to me” There was a note of desperation in his voice and after taking the correct amount of time to assess if this was a ploy, Ida took pity on him, moving towards the hulking thing before her, though even she wasn’t quite sure how she managed to cross the distance.

Multiple arms wrapped around her, the embrace was warm and oddly gentle but there was an undercurrent of strength to it and Ida held no illusions about her chances of breaking free should he not want her to. He buried his face in the crook of her neck and sighed. Honestly at this size he was a little heavy but the way he seemed to sag with relief as he held her, made her feel obliged to weather through it with dignity.

“Apologies Ida, I did not think they would be so brazen as to attack you while you were under my protection. It was terribly rude and I am quite upset with them.”

As she patted one of his arms in what she hoped was a comforting gesture. Ida thought about the numerous dead monsters presently leaking blood and viscera onto the forest floor and concluded that The Spider Prince had a remarkable talent for understatement.

[queen-mabs-revenge]

❤️ parker family values ❤️

cinematic parallels 😊

[vazelbeak]

Whos your least vs favorite character in HH and HB and why?

Hm, now this I'd say takes some thought, both because of how we don't have Hazbin out right now to entirely judge (how much they change from the pilot to the show like designs can very quite a bit Not just because of more or different writers but because of generally more resources provided like time and money, but that varies studio to studio.) But also because it depends on criteria, which if up to me, I find a lot of Vivs characters are good in certain areas but unfortunately lack components in others needed to give them well rounded personalities, motivations, backgrounds, ect.

Hazbin

Least favorite: This likely isnt too shocking as I find Angel Dust is for a lot of people is kinda both a least and most favorite simultaneously. He has a very distinct character design workable for a silhouette test which I can easily give credit to! However He doesn't appear to look much like a spider in those as much as a general insect. My mind immediately goes to a stick bug not because of the legs but just proportionally he doesnt really have any spider proportions and even non silhouette speaking if the spots under his eyes were his other eyes, my problem with that is the both only look like spots, and don't act like eyes. I also find myself not a fan of how his design thus far hasnt tied into his capabilities. Personally I'm a fan of zoology, I loved catching bugs and lizards as a kid and my grandpa worked in pest control so he actually did at times teach me about insects. So when I see Angel dust, a spider next to someone like Val (who ive heard a varied cockroach and moth) my immediate thought goes to "Angel youre a spider, youre arguably the most capable of taking him out".

Looking it up the animals that are largely immune to spider venom are hedgehogs, skunks, ground squirrels, and pigs (points for his pig I will presume it intentional!) While the idea perhaps he has gold teeth replaced his canines that could be used for that, it also brings to question why didn't Angel use them prior? Or did he and somehow fail like not using enough? How did Val get the upper hand when to my knowledge Angel had 40 more years in hell than him? What was angel even doing before Val even arrived? Overall I find him to have interesting bits to him, but he has the development reminiscent of OCs I made in highschool where they were largely based upon aesthetics, but the substance that ties those pieces together is largely lacking. I'd also enjoy his character more if the whole "sinners being based on animals and objects" wasn't aesthetic (hell if they actually meant something symbolism wise, like Angel being a spider bc he himself for lack of a better term in life was toxic. He got by in life by weaving nice webs of lies and false promises, and the moment someone fell for it and got caught, he would poison them and turn them into Husks.

And maybe thats part of what weirdly works for him and Husk to become close. Be it Husk is already an aftermath of what Angel turned people into, making him almost redeem himself by helping someone that represents all the things he did wrong to people, or maybe its just Angel is put in a place of for once needing to see someone not for what they can do for him, but for who they are, because he never had to face anyone in the aftermath of what he did to them.

Most favorite: It may just be the personal family stuff, and it may just be my love of animals, but Husk has to be a favorite. Its very possible and likely because unlike the others we haven't had as much of Husk shown or given to us to really dislike. He comes off as your grumpy older dude who even just seeing the basic details of characters before watching the Pilot, I could see him playing a father figure role to someone like Crymini (or Crimini? I don't see enough of her to remember the spelling.) a rebellious teen which iirc was part of the original idea, and seems to semi carry into the show now if the leaks gave any idea since he was listed as a shoulder to cry on. And that bit is good! We should be able to see that pose and expression on his face and read that! Overall unlike Angel his personality reads as more charming by contrast to Angels constant jokes and being mean. (Unfortunately for Angel hes given traits that for some people like me, that gets grating fast when theres nobody he's going back and forth with and theres direct consequences to his actions that only appear to hurt others. This is funny when theres acknowledgement of a character having tried their best or theyre a jerk but there is a invaluable ability that makes their behavior a sort of price to pay for which also makes said character come off as despite the behavior having good intentions or at least good for helping the people we're supposed to root for) but Husk while he can come off as a jerk as a grumpy character has it balanced by having other characters provoke it and appear unbothered by his annoyance. It makes him a jerk to the audience, but not to the other characters that would make him hard to like. His design id say while not the worst, also doesnt entirely make the most sense I know he was apparently made by Viv's sibling so I'm not gonna look to style, but I am like angel gonna look at the function. With a magic and slot machine themes I'm left wondering why he's a cat mixed with a bird and not a dove mixed with a lion (two animals associated with magic and even vegas wheres slot machines are associated with) or even just a dragon theme in general as theyre seen as magical creatures. Looking at his design it does leave a lot to be desired, but hes meant to be a cat with wings and looks like one. I will say I'm not a fan of his outfit as it stands. Both because it doesn't really read as a ba tender outfit, and because his lack of shirt just immediately makes me think "theres gonna be so much hair in those drinks" which is specifically an issue because a bartender outfit would help remedy this to a degree. I think as it stands Husk is a favorite for me because what little of his character we have is relatively consistent, we don't know enough about his backstory for it to drastically contrast with his current life in hell yet, and his design tells us his personality, but only in pose and expression. I also wish his design meant something such as if he's essentially a sorry excuse for a dragon because a Husk implies he's a shell of what he once was and so instead of looking much more like mythical creature he's reduced to looking like a cat with bird wings. Wings that based. Being dark on the inside would either be fake or poorly maintained to the point he's incapable of flying. Itd be cool if his appearance tied into a theme of someone who's somewhat lost sight of all the magic in the world/become desensitized to it all (and therefore good in the world). He is one of the last people next to Vaggie to fall for tricks that rely on you being overly trusting of people. He does however fall for stuff that feeds into his need to be the smarter person it makes him feel validated because you have to be smart to pull off magic tricks and not being smart makes him feel like he has nothing. Imply he won't take a card because he can't read it and he'll snatch it out of your hands to prove you wrong. But he really likes seeing peoples eyes light up at a slight of hand trick.

I would like to think bc Husk has stopped seeing good in the world its the ways others like Charlie and Vaggie try and fail at things that almost force Husk to care because despite him being that way, he can't stand other people going down the same path. So he may not say anything when you fail at something and get upset over it. But the next morning after a night of complaining youll see whatever it is completed. I really hope they manage to make his character work i think it could be done really easily with what we already have.

Helluva

Least: I think as much as I would like to say Millie for how under utilized and how much potential she could hold as someone who grew up on a farm and became an assassin, it doesn't compare to the shift from concept to final product that Blitzø had as well as his constant screen time that doesn't help. Starting visually Blitzø doesn't really look like a clown turned assassin and the spikes on his back give an iguana esque look to him as an Imp. I like the stylized head shape that a 3/4s angle can give his head a heart shape, however i find his forehead marking both overly complex and that it doesn't appear to serve much of a purpose to where it would benefit being simplified. Naturally I think it would be cool to see how Blitzo's iguana traits tie into his design such as not being very aware of social ques because iguanas often communicate visually. However my biggest problem with Blitzø is how he seemed to work much better conceptually. Which is to say Blitzø is a jerk.

Now, jerk characters have to be handled well. The more of a jerk they are and the more it touches upon real life forms of unpleasant behavior the more you need to work to make their behavior palatable enough to keep the audience engaged. We're supposed to root for Blitzø after all! But when Blitzø calls Moxxie the r slur, he sexually harasses his employees, those are very real things that are not very funny IRL (having experienced some of these things, it especially makes them all the more grating which is something that should be somewhat accounted for in making jerk characters by balancing their traits). And luckily there are ways these jerk traits can be remedied. Ill keep it to three I type long enough and my talking tends to be worse.

Jerk characters are very case by case due to the varied nature in which theyre a jerk. However there are general balancing methods.

-Karmatic repercussions. Karmatic repercussions are often the use of am almost cosmic force punishing a jerk character for their actions. It often is more employed in kids cartoons but the idea is to make fun of them for how they act or make them. A good example id point to is Squidward who is often an annoyed grumpy jerk who refuses to engage with the fun of spongebobs antics but this is remedied by often having a sort of punishment that is funny. Its funny for Squidward to be run over by giant rock because he naturally doesn't believe spongebob can ride a rock, as well as being comically squished in the sand.

- Heart of gold where is counts. I am under the impression this was the goal for Angeldust but functionally this is where your jerk character frequently is a jerk however will show their kinder side after things go too far or to prevent things from going too far. Usually youll see this is persistent for villains who team up with the protagonist against another far more evil forces but sometimes its out of remorse for a protagonist. A workable example id point to would be Cotton from King of The Hill who's a jerk, but when Peggy loses her teaching license he does help her get it back despite largely being a unpleasant person. He's unpleasant but when it counts he helped her. (I dont have a good gif for this one so this will have to do)

-Who cares he's a loser. This one is fairly simple and utilized in a lot of cartoons. CodeName: Kids Next Door, The Grim Adventures of Billy and Mandy, Pokemon, Invader Zim, ect. Where a character is a jerk but theyre a loser which both downgrades the seriousness of what they do and makes us take what they say less impactful. A decent example I point to is Jack Spicer from Xaolin Showdown. He's a bad guy but we take his evil actions less seriously and are able to believe him becoming a good guy because we don't take those evil actions seriously.

And thats where Blitzøs concept art comes into play. i think a lot of his unpleasant and jerk traits would've been much more tolerable and able to be put up with if he was meant to be loser. He could insult Moxxie only to trip and fall into a mud puddle and it would work because it takes away any of the gravity of what he says. Quite literally "who cares what Blitzø says about Moxxie hes a loser". But on top of that its the way Blitzø is made a focus that also contributes to him being so grating. Youd think an episode focusing on where Millie grew up would focus on her and tell us a bit about maybe where and why she went from a farm to the assassin business and how she found the job but we got Blitzø and Striker. Youd think an episode that seemed meant to focus on Loona and Octavia based on the thumbnail and implication we'd see Loona's backstory would be about them, but instead it's Blitzø and Stolas on a sitcom set that we've had no indication really had any meaning or purpose to the story beyond Blitzø for some reason having trauma over seeing Loona at the pound. Which in itself was one of the big things that made me dislike his role im the story. Typically when you set up a flashback giving a characters backstory through the eyes of another person its to present a contrast in how they respectively viewed the situation or how that effected the character.

It would make sense if it was about why Blitzø is so over bearing towards Loona, because he's really trying to make her feel like she could do something with her life and that she's not a hopeless cause like she was told. But the way Blitzø is the one traumatized and we don't see how Loona was effected or how this looked through her eyes makes it feel like a last minute jumpstart to get Blitzø and Stolas out of the building after writing them into that situation.

Looking at it on a writing stand point and setting aside how unnecessary it felt to the plot akin to Millie and Moxxie's plot, a set up like that would have been a perfect for Blitzø to confront what happened that made him no longer perform on stage and why it was so significant. It felt like a perfect set up where Blitzø after having a flashback to how he met Loona would disregard the teleprompters and make a grandiose speech about how you can't just replace family the moment they become inconvenient to you. That in choosing to raise them as your own you have to take responsibility for not properly training and teaching them to behave and so he needs

Blitzø would be talking about its not right for him to just replace Loona when he adopted her knowing she had issues and made no efforts to actually correct her behavior. (In which Blitzø being overbearing would make sense as seeing this his responsibility even if Loona's an adult). But to the people on set, their actor just went of script and improvised a touching and impactful speech about the importance of responsibility. And as they end the episode, Blitzø gets the applause and cheer that makes him think he'd should consider becoming an actor as he makes his way to his dressing room until he's handed a paycheck and can't believe he's making so little. What do these guys take him for?! Do they have any idea how exhausting it is go be on camera for that long without commercial breaks?!

From their he and Stolas sneak out of the building while everyone else is preoccupied leaving the check discarded on thr floor of the dressing room and part of the joke is the actor Blitzø was mistaken for is later found dead is mourned for having died after giving the best performance of his life. Maybe someone sees Stolas discard his human form and they think he's the owl man cryptid known for hovering around people or places before tragedy but only conspiracy theorist types believe that.

But the sitcom plot didn't amount to much and the excuse Blitzø has a panic attack over Loona's trauma to a point of on camera claiming to see a kid snorting coke in the dressing room (which let me say with the amount of child actors that have come forward regarding how they were mistreated and knowing they turned to drugs either over stress or over their parents giving it to them, it comes off rather tasteless) doesnt even come off funny as unlike Darla Dimple in Cats Don't Dance, she wasn't mean or rude in a way to make it feel funny as though Blitzø was actually doing some good by revealing she did something horrible.

And because of that it just makes it harder to enjoy because Helluva Boss ends up this big show where Blitzø is the center of attention but he is arguably the least enjoyable character to have on screen. He's overall not a balanced enough character to find engaging on screen but its arguably made worse knowing theres such a massive contrast between who he is on screen vs the conceptual work that made his character feel much more balanced for the role he plays that feels like came to be from self fandomization.

Most: I don't know if this may be the personal connection speaking but to me, my favorite character is Octavia. Visually she doesn't look much like a hybrid between a swan and Owl as much as the crow owl hybrid Stolas is reminiscent of. I think it would be more interesting if her outfits had more variety in which she had royal clothes she has to wear but her outfit we currently see her wear is meant to be causal and comfortable but because she's part of the Goetia that is her only outfit meant to be because she's heavily expected to embrace her royal status and get used to walking around in royal attire. (Perhaps this is even an outfit she made herself and she would love to design clothing if given the chance?). I wish we saw more incorporation of the animals Stolas and Stella were and how Octavia inherits those traits as it could be a means to expand on how whether we like it or not we inherit our parents traits and not just physically. (Also perhaps expand on how Stella may be so against divorce because Swans mate for life meaning if Stolas leaves her she intended to kill the both of them. Meanwhile for Stolas as a tawny owl, while some mate for life its not universal potentially reflecting why divorce is seen as a problem. And in a way its their contrast in mentalities regarding marriage). Id argue she has the most interesting and compelling narrative of having to learn the harsh reality of your parents not being perfect and how to handle that. A struggle that you especially become aware of when your parents split and actively despise one another. My only issue with it is how often her feelings are dismissed or diminished as though an "id never forget about you" erases the times Stolas did ignore her or forget about something important in favor of Blitzø and Stella. (Viv your claim to writing the moments that everyone praises ignores how you as the creator of an indie production greenlight the worst moments too and its shameful to see you throw your fellow writers under the bus like that.) We've never seen anything meant to make these moments outliers or implied such outside of Stolas's insistence he does care for her and often times far too late.

And as much as it can be argued "why would Stolas remember, why didnt Octavia wait until he was done on the phone?" I both admittedly sooner sympathize with a kid who misunderstood their parents over a parent who to my knowledge would face no consequences to hanging up or holding the phone away to quickly ask "what" incase of an emergency as well as find it to be rather bad writing to make such a reach for why Octavia would feel so upset that she'd run away, just to flip it and insist "no actually she doesnt realize how much her dad loves her though". It feels inconsistent especially when we see Stolas in the audience of a sitcom set and not (what i feel wouldve made the focus on him more justified) ditching Blitzø because unlike his assassin boyfriend, Octavia has no means to protect herself and no familiarity with the human world.

To me Octavia would be an interesting figure to give us a sort of parallel or contrast to her and Stolas's upbringing. Did Stolas stay with Stella because in being raised by Paimon he assumed two parents was better than one based on what he wanted? Does Octavia need to produce an heir? Why not?

I think it would be an interesting direction if because Stolas was forced into an arranged marriage he has an aversion to anything that feels more than causal because his only experiences with love as a kid involved being forced into molds chose by other people and by result while he spared Octavia from needing to produce an heir, he's struggled to allow her form much in the way of any relationships outside her immediate family and it makes her likely struggle to understand other people since her interactions have been so limited. Overall I like her as a character, visually her design doesn't really work with what we know but could be expanded on to work if we got more of her character, and I really hope they actually give us more to her than just being "Stolas's sad daughter who just tragically doesn't realize he loves her"

A lot of it boils down to their intended ideas may be interesting and hold a lot of potential, but if you can't balance them out enough to be entertaining on screen and interesting characters both visually and writing wise, its gonna be really hard for me to root for who you want me to.