#proud to say i believed in them from day one while everyone else was hating

[leclercari]

“Doing the intimacy stuff brought us closer because you just have to have such a high level of trust with your co-worker. We were really lucky. Maybe it was because we had to lean into the humour and quick banter with each other on set, it just bled over into how we were in real life. I don’t know, but we became friends very fast and I’m grateful that we did.” — Taylor Zakhar Perez

[princessconsuela120]

☁ FEARLESS ☁

— ☁

Summary: as the Curtis sister its practically known that you're off limits. However, Dallas Winston was never one to follow rules. Or in which your brother gave you a strict set of rules to stay alive in Tulsa, and you have done amazingly well at breaking all of them.

Warnings: I guess angst? Cursing

Author’s Note: rekindling my love for the Outsiders recently so if any has any other requests send them in!

— ☁

IT WAS ALWAYS A MATTER OF PRIDE WHEN IT CAME TO YOUR BROTHERS. You weren't too fond of that fact that you have been single for the past 16 years of your life was something they were proud of. They were your protectors, and it seemed as if all of Tulsa was aware of that. Though your oldest brother, Darry, would never fail to remind you that these were your wishes. Of course, the wishes you made when you were 9 and didn't know there were boys who existed besides your brothers. Ever since your parents passed, your oldest brother Darry was pretty much your dad. He was doing the best he could, and you knew that, but he couldn’t help but be protective as he is, now that his baby sister is all grown up. Now you were far from being a baby, which is were the Curtis brothers long list of rules came in.

number 1 - NEVER walk anywhere alone; there are thousands of greasers in this town, you are bound to find at least one who will take you home.

Now, this rule was ultimately demolished one day you failed to find someone to walk you, and had single handed lay taken down five socs alone with your switch blade. This seemed to scare your brothers more than the socs you took down, and ultimately the rule was no longer there to be followed.

number 2 - curfew is 9:00 no later.

though you would always argue with Darry, in a town as dangerous as Tulsa was for us greasers, 9:00 was a reasonable curfew. But, this rule was ultimately outlawed the second you start your new job at the Dairy Queen, where for whatever reason you wouldn’t arrive home from your shift until after 10:00. Now this was ruled by Sodapop as strictly for your job, but Darry seemed to know better. Turns out your shift at the Dairy Queen ended at 8:30, which only peaked your brother curiosity as to where the hell you could have been for the hour and a half that followed.

number 3 - always wear your helmet while riding you bike birdie, I can’t believe I even have to tell you that.

Though Darry was reluctant to even make this one a rule, seeing as it should be common sense, after a near death motorcycle accident, it seemed important enough to mention. Sometimes having a rebellious sister was fun for the boys, and other times it ended in nights in the hospital due to motorcycle accidents. What can you say, you liked the way your hair blew in the wind, and absolutely hated helmet hair.

number 4 - whenever you are home alone all doors and windows must be locked and shut.

the boys always tried to do everything in their power to make sure you weren’t ever home alone, but there were circumstances that couldn’t be avoided. Like when pony boy had school, and everyone else was working. Like Sodapop you had also dropped out of school early, to save the money. Now, if it ever happened you were home alone, let’s just say you found a way to not be.

number 5 - no pets, you can barely take care of yourself.

another obvious one in Darry’s opinion, and also Ponyboy’s least favorite rule. The two of you had been begging Darry to buy a pet for two years now, and every time the answer was the same. No. Sodapop was allergic to dogs, so that was ruled out, and you could barely take care of yourselves let alone a pet. However, after one particularly long ride on your motorcycle, you discover a tiny kitten who had been sneaking shelter in you bike’s motor. Something you had never seen before, and when you arrived home with the tiny blueish grey kitten, not even Darry had the heart to tell you to put it back. Harley, as you decided to name him, for obvious reasons, had become your new best friend. He was practically attached to your side, and turns out taking care of him was easier than taking care of yourself.

number 6 - tell your brothers where you are going before you go out, so if anything happens we know where you are.

you had argued on many occasions that this one was a bit much. You were 16, and perfectly trustworthy. There was no reason why Darry had to know where you were at all times, in a town that you could yell in the center and be heard in every corner. Now, seeing as phones weren’t as accessible as Darry had hoped, this rule was quickly abolished when you had gained a habit of taking Ponyboy out for rides on your bike, which never consisted of specific locations to track.

number 7 - no sneaking out, once you are in for the night you’re in.

Even though your room was your favorite place in the world, you couldn’t help but have a rebellious heart like the other greasers. With a curfew of 9:00, and daylight savings where the sun was still out and you weren’t, you started a habit of watching the sunset. Now, you had a rule for this and your brother didn’t. It was ruled unfair by yourself, when both you and Ponyboy started getting caught together, sneaking out to two completely different places. Poor Darry was bound to get a heart attack from you two.

number 8 - nothing illegal, this should be a rule of life not of the house, but if you go to jail I will personally lecture you myself.

Now, this one was a special occasion rule, added after a particular series of events. It was your first time ever doing anything illegal, and of course you got caught. Even though you had your best interest at heart, the police didn’t see it that way. It was your’s and Soda’s birthday, and you felt awful that the poor guy had to work. So you went to the store, and looked around for a record to buy as his present. Stevie Wonder, you and Soda’s artist, he pretty much represented your relationship with him. But when the time came, you realized you didn’t have nearly enough money to buy it. So you tried to sneak it out of the store. Of course, hiding a record that was wider than you under your shirt isn’t the best idea.

number 9 - keep your distance from the socs, we have enough beef with them, they would love to get their hands on the Curtis sister.

This rule was a follow up rule of almost every rule before it. The Socs were the center of all evil, and it was almost impossible to avoid them. It became its own separate rule after a particularly difficult run in. You tried, you really did, but it just wasn’t a fair fight. 6 against one, and you had left your blade at home. Two-Bit had found you while he was walking home the next morning, your brothers hearts each broke when they saw how beaten up you were. Darry wasn’t mad at you, he was mad at himself. So he made it a new rule.

number 10 - no rumbles, I don’t need any broken bones.

as a greaser, rumbles were basically inevitable, it was a part of life. Knowing you, you loved to give your brothers heart-attacks, and a rumble was no different. Every rumble before this one was fine, but this was a particularly rough patch. Everything was fine, and fair, and good. Until the damned Soc pulled a knife on you. Cut up y the bridge of your nose so bad, it left you with a nasty scar between your eyes. You loved it though, though it made you look tough. Darry however hated it, it was just a reminder that you weren’t as tough as you convinced him you were.

number 11 - no, and I mean absolutely no boys. You have three brothers right here at home and enough boys in the gang to be your family. You’re too young for a boy who will just take advantage of my beautiful baby sister anyway.

this was the important one. All other rules held less importance than this one. This is the ultimate, final rule. For as long as you were brown, Darry had made a promise, to himself and to you. He would protect you, and care for you, and never let anything hurt you. Now if that meant you would be mad at him for it for your entire high school life, he was fine with it, as long as he protected you. Now, the entire gang knew this rule and helped you to follow it. But we all know how Dallas Winston feels about rules.

[gatheringbones]

[“My Bodysex Workshops were well received, so I decided to film one. You just can’t beat the moving image; it’s an opportunity to give people images of what sex might be. The best way for us to learn is to find out what’s going on with everyone else.

My girlfriend and I used a home video camera, and it took me two years to edit it on two clunky tape decks. My films were automatically labeled porn, because if you see a pussy or a penis, it’s porn. But you can’t teach sex without getting explicit, so, again, I found myself embracing the role of pornographer.

Before the Internet, every time I said “masturbation,” it either sent folks into gales of laughter or provoked embarrassed looks as they quickly changed the subject. My articles for magazines were canceled and interviews for television ended up on the cutting room floor. The bottom line of sexual repression is the prohibition of childhood masturbation. This humble activity is the basis for all of human sexuality. The Internet was the first place in my long career that I was not censored.

My old lover Grant ran my first website. At the end, he was classified as legally blind, and held a magnifying glass, with his nose an inch from the screen. When I joined forces with law school grad and cyber geek Carlin Ross, we created a new website. I believe that once Grant met Carlin, he was able to leave his disintegrating body. He made it to his eighty-sixth birthday and died proud with his boots on, with the next upload for my website sitting on his hard drive. I miss him terribly to this day. We had the most passionate love/hate affair of the century.

Carlin and I offer free, accessible sex information, both visual and written, to women and men. We call the clips where we show sexual skills, “The New Porn.” Sex education must be entertaining, not academic, dry, boring, or stilted. I’m not afraid of the word porn. If people are going to call my explicit sex education porn, then I say embrace the word. Be the new porn, be the porn you want to see. While it’s true that a lot of pornography out there is shitty for the most part, it still works: it gets people hot. The biggest turn on for me is to have a fully orgasmic partner, not someone pretending or playing. We all know the real deal when it’s happening—authentic orgasms are unmistakable. I’m a sex-positive feminist, liberating women one orgasm at a time.

Our site represents a new feminist sexual politics that’s well beyond any victimhood of rape and sexual abuse. We represent orgasmic feminism—a new movement of women who have taken control of our sex lives, and who dare to design them in any way we choose whether we’re straight, bi, lesbian, or a combination, and we can enjoy our bodies in any way we desire.”]

betty dodson, from the porn wars, from the feminist porn book: the politics of producing pleasure, edited by tristan taormino, constance henley, and celine perreñas shimizu, 2013

[concert-bflat]

I suddenly got hit with Kano Brainworms and now I have this Completely Unorganized post and it's gonna be your guys' problems now !! Just saying there is no flow to this whatsoever I just slapped all my points on and called it a day

Just. god I will Never stop thinking about the Tateyama siblings relationship with their younger selves and changing and growing and learning to accept themselves and Kano's. Not doing that. Remaining stagnant.

Like it's Everywhere . (Unfortunately it's been Sooo long since I've read light novel 5 so I don't have any sources to pull from there but I'm sure there's a ton okay)

Yobanashi Decieve is spent tearing down Kano's layers throughout the entire song and what do you find at the end? When he finally admits that he hates all this? Hates himself? What do you find at the center of the Kano Onion? His crying child self. At his core he still believes he is that crying boy, even says it himself "Ah, you never change", he's sneering at his current and past self, because they're the same, they're all the same. He's never moved on from his past habits and weakness. He looks at him and all he has to say is "Ah, you never change" and "Whoops, I screwed up"

Oh but we're not Quite done peeling the Kano Onion yet !! There's still a liiitle more left...

Close-up shot time !! Now you can see in its fullness his weakest moments, he's mocking his own suffering. He smiles and mocks himself, closes his eyes to his own pain and just bows. Throws my laptop

There's also this official art !! I think about this a lot but have never voiced it out before so here we go~

Just. Everyone showing off the wounds that led to their deaths, either with a smile/some enthusiasm or indifference at worst, with a pretty character-telling pose as well. And then fucking Kano, not even focusing on the photoshoot but staring directly at the evidence of his weakest moment, holding it limply, detachedly. Maybe saying that he's starting at it with scorn is too strong a word, his face looks slightly bitter at best, but I'd bet everything that that's what he's feeling.

I don't know just. Everyone around him, whether it's his siblings or the whole god damn Dan, being shown with some form of acceptance of their pasts and traumas, meanwhile Kano's still staring it in the face. Damn, you really don't lie when you say you haven't changed huh?

God my favorite example though, the one that makes me Scream.

Thank you Sidu for this art! I am now on the ground crying.

I'm too lazy to grab them right now but Kido and Seto also have art of themselves with their past selves. Kido fondly pats the head of her younger, insecure self, having growing confident and comfortable in her own skin. Seto holds his past self's hand in something liks solidarity. He doesn't have to be scared anymore. He's becoming the stronger person that he wanted to be.

And Kano?

Ah. well~. He's clinging to his past self, sobbing into his lap while his past self attempts to comfort him. Hm. With growing up you should become someone that your younger self can be proud of, right? Like Kido and Seto. They overcame their shortcomings so they could become proud of who they are today, right? Kano's collapsed in front of his past self.

Guess he didn't really do that, huh?

If anything, he's putting himself even lower than his past self. Maybe he hasn't grown, maybe not even stagnated but rather became worse, just with the same flaws that he had in the past. He didn't change at all, he just sank lower.

Your younger self can attempt to comfort you but didn't you hate yourself back then, too? So what does that make you now? Your younger self looks hunched over and dejected. He's probably just as disappointed as you are.

Ah, and there's text too, right? What does that say?

Mm. (I might have written an incorrect character but this sounds about right I think?) I feel like this was said somewhere else in kagepro, also in regards to Kano, but to be completely honest I totally forgot where. Still though. Uh.. fun! Kano says to himself not words of comfort but assurance that the future will only be more miserable, that he will only hate himself more as time goes on. As if you couldn't already tell with the art itself.

In Yobanashi Decieve, present Kano sees his other self suffering and jeers scornfully. They never changed. Here, past Kano and present Kano suffer together, with present Kano openly suffering if only to himself, clinging to his past hurt for comfort. Together they think, they never will change, they'll only get worse. It'll only get more painful.

Ahem. Just. Ugh! This one piece says so god damn much, and even more when you put it next to Kido's and Seto's. It killed me when I first saw it and still kills me to this day !!! God !

Also I don't have any funny images for this one but. Thinks about. (And I might have some details wrong because again, it's been a while since I've read light novel 5) How he thought he was useless as a child, wondered why he wasn't discarded like a functionally useless object (pretty sure he thought this while his mom threw away a broken tv remote or something?). And then in manga route 2 how he gives his life away as a tool to preserve the others' lives. He has a "use" and he's expending his whole life on it. Like I mean they're gonna die anyway but do you Really have to be like that I Hate you I hate you I h

Like once he has an objective purpose like that he faces it with an easy smile on his face. Bittersweet, yeah. But he does it so god damn willingly. Maybe he's just pretending to take on the role so easily, but still, I can't help but think that he found some comfort in having a direct "use" like this. Even if it just meant his death, for a hopeless cause. If he could just fulfill this purpose, then....

Just the way he smiles at his own demise during that Whole Sequence, even when the remainder of the Dan is Right There.

Just man. Collapses.

Kagepro is all about change and growth and growing up and realizing change and the future really isn't too scary. Meanwhile Kano's stagnant, still sees him as unchanged from his younger self, is too scared to change his manners even if it may help him. No wonder he hates himself. I'm just. Guh, shoves the themes of the narrative in his face Kano Please I'm begging

Like mf he looks content like everyone else in Summertime Record but Are You Really. Are you Really happy yet. Have you really found it within yourself to accept change. Accept yourself. Accept Everything. Do you really think that you'll be able to finally make your younger self smile?

Buries my face in my hands God this man will never Not haunt me for the rest of my days. Get him therapy. I'm normal about him.

I was supposed to be working on assignments but here I am, with my stupid little Kano essay at 1 in the morning. I doubt anyone's gonna read this but if you did I hope you enjoy? This man is very silly in all the worst ways. I love him, I hate him, I want to shove him into a microwave. I want to put him under a microscope. I have multiple times. This man is like a fundamental character that will never Not be a part of my life even when I thought the kagepro hellhole was somewhat behind me for the meantime. He just. Man! He's a lot. And I hope you're in pain with me now too over it ! Okay that's all bye byee~

[the-quiet-blogger]

"The Giggle"

You know it's been a while since I've gone truly absolutely batshit over a Doctor Who episode, but here we are. Spoilers, obviously, under the cut.

First of all: UNIT

While I'm not a huge fan of The Doctor working for/with Earth-based Space police, I think it's a great idea to have the companions in a safe environment where they have a place to use all of the knowledge they've gathered during their journey throughout the starts. They get paid to continue doing what they love and while it does set things up to have future (LIVING) companions to make little cameos (or even an option for a spin-off series, I think that it's ultimately a good choice that RTD decided to let the companions have a space where they can live, grow, and continue to help.

One problem I have with this is that this is exactly where Martha and Mickey went at the end of 10's run -- and yet absolutely 0 (zero) mention of them or their whereabouts. They're the OG companions joining UNIT, so where TF are they??

Also this guy?? The Vlinx?? I both love and hated that we didn't get much explanation for this Guy in the Chair. Just "Oh you're helping?! Sure! Absolutely no reason to think that this new alien and the weird thing that's happening are related ANYWAYS--"

A bit like Panda from JJK where it's just "yeah and this is Vlinx, it works here, moving on,"

LOVE the jab about antivaxxers using the narrative of the Zeedex. It DOES help, but since you're asking the masses (who all wholeheartedly believe that they are right and everyone else is wrong) to put this on, it becomes a bit harder -- we saw how Kate reacted the moment she willfully put it on. Also return of our #Queen for her role as the News Anchor. Glad she has a name now.

Secondly: Donna <3 my absolute beloved. She has grown so fucking much. From yelling at the world because that's the only way to be heard to quietly asking The Doctor what is wrong. She has grown into her own woman, though of course still missing a lot of main action before the metacrisis was resolved (I could write a whole other deep dive about that episode too). When she noticed that the laughter was notes -- "The Giggle" hiding behind the screen, I was so proud of her. This is why the Doctor needs an "every day" human -- and Donna is so blunt that she won't hold back on her observations, though I have to wonder if the whole recorder conversation with Rose was how she came out. I hope so, that's just so chaotic.

I've seen some people argue that there is still some TimeLord in her because of how smart she's been in these last few episodes.

To that I say

"bitch, do you not remember the bees disappearing???"

Donna Noble is a genius and an idiot. Both can exist in the same person, in the same character, and that's exactly what they proved with the previous episode.

and SPEAKING OF her being a genius

She loves The Doctor, not romantically, but in a "platonic soulmate" kind of way that makes my heart full. When she realized that The Doctor never mentioned Mel or any of their adventures, she pointed it out. Not only that, she told The Doctor point-blank that there's always something that the Time Lord seems to be running from. There's never really been a moment when he's stopped and talked about any of the shit that he's been through and she can tell that it's starting to wear on him.

"Maybe that's why your old face came back. You're wearing yourself out"

and he immediately changes the subject and charges forward despite her telling him a harsh truth. She's travelling with him again, sure, but it was supposed to be some short little trip and I think the main reason she went with him in the first place (whether or not she will admit it) is because she saw her friend in crisis and wanted to be around to help -- to figure out what exactly he needed from her. With each episode, she's tried to guess why his old face came back, but nothing stuck.

The fucking puppet show.

Now, I feel like this is a great way to catch up new fans with any old Doctor trauma that they may have missed. It was also a way to shove it into The Doctor's face just how many of his loved ones that he was responsible for killing.

Now, before I hear any one say "but what about ______??"

Rory wasn't as close to The Doctor as Amy had been. "The first face this face saw" and while they did become closer later on, he would always have a special place in his heart for Amy. He watched her die for fucks sake.

Martha wasn't mentioned because as far as he knows, she's still alive and kicking ass. That's part of the reason he will up and abandon certain companions, so he doesn't get them hurt.

The Fam - left behind and alive. Remember 2/3 of the original Fam chose to step away from the TARDIS and Yaz was left before 13 could regenerate as she "needed to do this on [her] own". While, yes, I'm sure the Doctor feels guilty about leaving them behind, it's not nearly as bad as getting them killed.

Anyone else had either survived as far as The Doctor was aware, or hadn't been as close as those particular companions. That is why those 3 were chosen.

Now, back to the puppet show

Mentioning not only the lost companions but also the Flux

God I do not have the time to go into this half-assed recreation of a tragedy trying to be as big and bad as the Time War and Gallifrey. I feel like Chris Chibnall felt snubbed with a female presenting Doctor and gave us the most half-written mediocre bull shit he could have. RTD is already having to fix it with mentioning it several times and exactly what happened in the aftermath. Just looking up "Doctor Who Flux" you get so many results that all try to "explain" it.

If your audience has to look up how your writing makes sense, you aren't smarter or cleverer than the masses, it's just shit writing.

However,

While the actual Flux episodes and following regeneration made it hard to understand not only what happened, RTD breaks it down.

There was a terrible decision to be made. The universe was dying. The Doctor had to choose and a lot of deaths now lay on the Time Lord's shoulders.

BUT! That was also the only piece of The Doctor's trauma that couldn't be waved away with

Which is when The Doctor challenged the Toymaker to a game.

Back too 2023, we get...quite honestly one of the best scenes I've seen in New Who, only rivalled by Here Come the Drums with the Master dancing along. No, Rasputin doesn't come close to this cunty rendition of Spice Up Your Life.

Amazing, cunty, terrifying, entertianing, and fun.

"I think they're still falling" -- BITCH?!?!?! Ugh. I want more of the Toymaker. What a fun villain and Neil Patrick Harris knocked it out of the goddamn park. No matter what you thought about this episode, this dance routine was a highlight.

I also love the reference to when The Doctor had tried to reason with The Master, asking to go amongst the stars with fun filled adventures, taking on the burden of being their jailer and caretaker for the rest of eternity if it meant that humanity was safe.

Of course, we all know what comes after the Toymaker refuses the call to the stars.

I immediately started crying. Before The Doctor even started with those last words, I wasn't ready to say goodbye. We went from "I don't want to go" to "allons-y". From him dying alone in his TARDIS to being immediately surrounded by loved ones

"He's not dying alone"

And he didn't have to.

I choked on my crying so hard I almost died myself. I know David Tennant had always said that he thought The Doctor was asexual to some degree, but this is just ridiculous. /pos

But, when you consider the salt line at the edge of the universe and how that myth became a reality because of The Doctor's actions -- the fact that bigeneration was once a myth and now a reality suddenly opens up a whole door of possibilities for this upcoming season with Ncuti Gawa.

Now, The Doctor(s)

14 was consistently surprised in their actions, their off-the-hand comments. Something that 10 always struggled with was saying how much people meant to them.

And one thing about 14, they are filled with love. They openly say "I love ____" whereas 10 never did.

"Rose Tyler, I--"

Having to leave those he loved behind, never wanting to admit when he cared more than he did. As long as he spun and ran away from his feelings, they could never catch up to him. Right?

14 is different, always saying "I'm here", "You're okay" and slinging around the word "love" as if they would never grow tired of it. 14, obviously, is The Doctor after Amy, Clara, Billie, and the Fam. After avoiding a family with the Ponds, losing Clara after realizing they were toxic for her, a friend who never expected anything more from them, and Yaz's fam who only wanted to be a safe space for them to be able to turn to. Yaz, the last companion that was pushed away by The Doctor, had loved them and told them so and gotten nothing in return.

And there were so many different ways that 14 showed this love. So many hugs!! So many reassurances!! And so much love that The Doctor was sharing amongst everyone who could hear them -- and yet not a drop of that love or compassion showed inwards.

I am so emotional about this hug, it's not even funny. Literally healing their younger self. The love, the understanding, the "I'm here" -- finally someone who understands literally everything 14 has gone through. The acceptance of the hug (THE TUCK INTO THE NECK?!?!?FSKFBWILDNLADN) I fell to my knees!!!!! SOBBING!!!!!!!!

BUT!!! Not only is 15 born on the battlefield, but also born surrounded by love and fun. Pants or not, 15 is ready to save the world and make it a good time for those around them. Self assured, fun, smiling, and loving-- 15 jumps into the world with a confused hug and love for their past & current self. After years of therapy, I keep hearing some of the same phrases along the lines of "you have to look to your past/younger self and let them know that it's okay, that they shouldn't have had to go through all of that alone" and this was exactly that, only on a Time Lord scale.

Now, personally, I had fun watching the game of catch with the Toymaker after 15 was introduced. I thought it was a fun way to share the spotlight with Gawa as the 15th Doctor and let the audience know some hints as to what we have to look forward to.

The terms of endearment melted my little heart. I'm always a sucker for a good nickname, both in real life and in fiction and 15 was full of them.

"Honey, sweetie, pumpkin pie, you are too traumatized to be flying the TARDIS right now, get OUT and take a NAP"

That was basically what was said, right?

And then this...home. The Doctor having a family. This is quite honestly the perfect, happiest ending that The Doctor wearing this particular face could have had. All those years running away, fighting hard, and keeping on a strong face, and this is what that was for. All that running and avoiding, and love for everyone else but themself and now they finally can take a break and focus on taking time to say "what the hell". Maybe go to therapy. There's so much fic potential for this as well, the kinds of companions they could run into casually or little every day struggles that are literally alien to them.

I've seen a lot of posts upset that this plot point seemed to be circling around two points: 1) this a repeat of the metacrisis ending and 2) not the first time The Doctor had domestic bliss.

To that, I say:

the metacrisis Doctor was half human and would be able to grow old with Rose in that parallel universe. It was also the traumatic ending of the DoctorDonna (or so we thought) and on that beach, the Doctor, the Time Lord Doctor, still couldn't say how much Rose meant to him. He also said that living life, day after day, was the one thing that he could never have.

2. On Tranzalore, The Doctor was not resting. He was taking care of the tear in the universe and defending it from the monsters that would constantly be on the attack. Every day was a fight. And when he spent those 24 years with River Song, he knew that this was the last time they would meet before her end. How can you relax when you know that these are the last moments you're going to have with your loved one. You watched them die and this is the best that you can do with them in their last days, knowing that you can't stop death from coming.

And there is something so incredibly healing about The Doctor allowing themselves to stay here, with only occasional trips to the Moon with their favorite niece. and the possibility of them perhaps becoming a Curator -- who knows!!

And now we have Ncuti Gawa's 15th Doctor to look forward to and all of time and space!! I am so incredibly excited to see where this takes us on Christmas.

[vexo-silent-o]

This is for @imakeartandaskmickeymous

DUCKTALES (2018 series) SPOILERS AHEAD JUST BE WARNED IF YOU HAVENT FINISHED THE SERIES

They asked about Misté's (my ducktales OC) lore, and im happy to explain :) So basically my idea was after agent 22 took webby from FOWL's lab, they had just a little bit of scrooge's DNA left and decided to attempt another experiment. something backfired with her genetic coding, and now she has ✨autism✨ (because i do too, and i want to put more positive autism representation in the world). Gandra Dee (love her by the way) hated that FOWL was creating these kids just to use them, and decided to "save" her. She brought her to Gyro Gearloose's lab and left her outside the door. Gandra told the other members of FOWL that the genetic "malfunction" had caused her to die, and they believed her. Gyro didn't want to just leave her, and so he kept her and attempted to raise her. FOWL put her file with webby's and labelled it "July - FAILED". Gyro named "July" Misté, which is the Haitian-Creole word for mystery. He attempted to raise her to the best of his ability, and she idolized him her whole life. She preferred to stay in the lab, and didn't really trust people, which Gyro tried to help her through, but it didn't really work, but then one day Huey and fenton were looking for a file of Gyro's and stumbled upon misté's room. She got to know them, they became friends, and they introduced her to everyone else. Louie in particular came to see her as a younger sister, and is very protective of her. When Gyro started taking care of BOYD, Misté decided he was now her "younger" brother. she hopes to become an adventuring scientist, helping the triplets and webby on their adventured in the future using gadgets she makes.

little tidbit, for a while, she tried to come up with ideas just to get positive parental attention from gyro. He was just bad at showing it, but eventually he got better and now he isn't shy about showing his approval, especially by saying "im proud of you", which means a lot to misté

tidbit two, when misté is introduced to gandra by fenton, gandra immediately recognizes her, but keeps quiet. Eventually, on the adventure where we find out Webby is scrooge's daughter, we find out about misté's identity. Gandra feels bad, but no one holds it against her. Scrooge is happy to have TWO daughters, and webby is happy to have a sister.

Just btw this is a complete AU in my mind, and no one can stop me because it doesn't affect your precious ducktales timeline lol

[yrrtyrrtwhenihrrthrrt]

Fun fact about my agender ass I fully believed that gender identity did not exist until I was like fourteen

Like I had not experienced it so I assumed nobody else had. Now I know that gender, the gender binary, gender roles, are all social constructs, but from my understanding, gender identity isn't. Many many people are born with a gender identity in their brain, and sometimes it is the one they are expected to have, and sometimes it isn't, and sometimes it changes over time, and sometimes it develops over time, but most people have some gender identity in some way.

I, as well as some other people, just, don't.

And I had no way of knowing that anyone else experienced this. I really thought it was just a game everyone agreed to play. You get assigned a blue pinny or a yellow pinny in gym class and that's that. It kinda sucks but that's the game. It's not like "blue pinny" is a part of your identity, it's just an arbitrary assignment. You might wish you were on the yellow pinny team, because they get a head start in the dodgeball game, but you don't identify as a yellow pinny team member. And that is exactly how I saw, and still see my own gender.

And I have to apologize for this but this resulted in, when I was young, transphobia. It wasn't the violent kind you often see today, but it was dismissive and distasteful. Obviously I'm not proud of it. But I thought "how the fuck can you identify as a gender aside from your AGAB? Nobody "identifies" as anything you just take the assignment and go so ObViOuSlY it's made up." And I was talking to my sister about this and was like "I mean if you woke up in an alternate universe where you were a man, it would be no issue at all, right? I mean aside from having to get used to different body parts and being treated differently, it would be fine" and she was like "no???? Tf??? I'd be really upset!"

And that right there rocked my fucking shit and turned my world upside down. Anyway I learned a lot since then and I support everyone and their gender identities now, obviously, as it was over a decade ago. I realized that "I guess I'm a girl because I was born that way and I don't care enough to change it, even though I literally hate being perceived as a girl I'd hate being perceived as any other gender just as much" doesn't actually make me cis (shock!!) This is also why I much prefer the term agender to nonbinary. I've been asked if I'm nonbinary when I say I'm agender, and I know some agender people identify as nonbinary (power to you!) But to me, "non-binary" feels like a gender identity that is. Well. Nonbinary lol. It's like asking an atheist "so you have a non-Abrahamic faith?" Like no they don't have any faith at all. I don't have any gender identity at all. That's how I see it anyway.

But all this to say being agender is weird. And while I'm about as allo as they come, I can relate to asexual people in a lot of ways.

It's like there are these boxes and everyone else can see them, and everyone else can exist in them comfortably, and sometimes people have to change the shape of their box but at the end of the day, it'll fit them. But I can't see the boxes, yet I've been put inside one, and everyone else can see it. I don't want to change the shape of my box, it wouldn't make a difference. I just don't want to be in this box at all. I can't see it, I keep bumping into the walls. I'm glad when the boxes make other people happy, but all I want is to get rid of it. And while it's freeing to identify as agender within myself, to start using any pronouns instead of exclusively she/her, I know that everyone else can still see the box. If they didn't see me as a woman, they'd just see me as something else, some other box, and that's not any better.

And I'm so tired.

[beautifulpersonpeach]

another reason i'm happy for chap 2 is bts destroying all the narratives about them and women bpp. in the wild days of ✨discourse ✨ on tumblr, thank you for being the voice of reason. before i'd see people say bts avoids women because of armys, bts never works with women, bts hates women, bts has weird relationship with women, the relationships is weird because of armys. but what happened? rm worked with soyoon and now armys are listening to her music, became her fans, respecting her. jimin danced with women and nobody died. his female dancers are loved in fandom. suga has been working with women for a decade and the fandom never cared. all those bts - women theories and discourses just look so stupid now.

the same with the discourses about bts relating to other idols in hybe and general kpop. before covid bts played with txt and after covid in chap 2, bts returns playing with txt as their idol and comeback activities return to full. like normal like was always expected.

bpp my question is, where did these theories even come from?

***

Hi Anon,

It's funny, isn't it? I mean, on one hand there's always a faction of the fandom that believes the members belong to them and cannot date anyone (male or female), just as there is in every other k-pop fandom. But as you said, the talking points in certain k-pop spaces about ARMY's overall response to BTS working with women, being around women, having friendships with women, especially in contrast with how BTS relates to ARMY, has zero basis in reality.

Outside of the usual fandom tone-policing and checking y/n shippers (and taekookers), the whole idea of BTS - women - ARMY as a whole having any sort of weird relationship is a very recent thing too, because this is not a talking point I saw anywhere in the fandom before 2020. Going by some forums I was in at the time, I suspect this particular 'concern' was started by fans of other k-pop groups in 2020 and I'll just leave it at that. Like I vividly recall a Taemin stan telling me without preamble to wake up to the fact BTS is "kept away" from women. With BTS's long history of working with and interacting with women whether or not ARMY was in the picture, none of those theories made any sense to me.

It's such an odd thing to even debate or discuss given everyone can see with their own eyes how that dynamic has played out for the last 10 years. There's no conspiracy or anything to even theorize about, far as I'm concerned, because many of their female friendships and work relationships are well known.

Nobody lost their shit when Ryujin was spending time with BTS, when she filmed the reel with BTS, and afterwards when she talked about working with them. And I can list off 10 other women (at least) who this is true for too.

I hear you too about BTS working with other idols especially within HYBE. It's true that while touring in 2019 BTS was very busy and appeared 'removed' from TXT who where just ramping up, and that since 2015 BTS had focused more on curating their own content/variety shows given they'd been repeatedly disrespected and blackballed by the Korean media establishment. But they still interacted with other idols and after they clarified their plans for Chapter 2, just continued as expected. But somehow, the talking point of BTS feeling 'too proud' to interact with the rest of k-pop (by k-pop stans), that too took on a life of its own, and was made to seem more nefarious than it actually was. I still find a bit amusing tbh.

I think one reason these sorts of theories about BTS and the most innocuous things get obsessed over as fact by k-pop stans, is because for a group like BTS, those people have nothing else to say. There's very little you can actually hold against a group like BTS. And I'm not saying that just because I'm a fan. The fact is with the history most k-pop groups have, very few of them could last anytime at all in BTS's position with the amount of scrutiny on the group.

A second reason is k-pop fans relying on pre-conceived notions about a group they don't like, and then applying the worst examples of issues they've seen in their own or other k-pop fandoms, to BTS and ARMY regardless of whether it applies. For example, VIXX is in the news lately because a member worked with a broker to dodge military service in Korea, but before now that group was notorious for some of the most disturbing kinds of fan-service I've ever seen in k-pop.

Exhibits:

A female fan giving Hakyeon her thong to sign

(A lot of k-pop stans back then and today think this is cute, but imagine for a second if this was a BTS member and ARMY lmao)

*

The group members designing thongs and other lingerie for their female fans

(I mean, I can see how this could be a flex but imagine for one sec if this was in BTS's history)

*

And there's the group including a BDSM contract for their fans in their album

(Almost 10 years later and I still don't know what to say...)

*

Another example is members of Shinee saying point blank they can't talk about their dating life because their fans have told them they don't like it.

I mean, imagine if BTS did any of that today. Heck imagine if they did that years ago. K-pop stans are still making them pay dividends for War of Hormone and mixtape lyrics from 2015, even after a Women Studies professor vets their work, even after HYBE has female CEOs for their sub-labels, and even after on Blind in Korea female workers say HYBE is the best company in the entertainment sector to work for.

A lot of the talking points, criticism, or discourse around BTS sounds bonkers, especially if you know what else is going on in the industry, what other groups are doing or have done with nary a mention from the wider k-pop fandom.

It reminds me of how Jimin was getting flamed for missed insurance payments because someone stole his mail, while during the same day the news broke, Yang Hyun-suk (the guy who manages BlackPink and is debuting Baby Monster this summer) was in court after a former female trainee in his company claimed he threatened to kill her, gave her drugs, and pimped her out. If you took a look at the trending k-pop pages on Twitter or k-forums, you'd think Jimin was the one facing a sentence and not the guy that remains at the helm of YG.

Because as I keep saying, for many k-pop stans, the underlying issues are less important than who those issues are about. Apply the same thinking to the theories you see about BTS and women.

Even in the case of outright dating rumors in the past 10 years, the fandom didn't collectively lose their shit. Jennie's case being the exception because she had the double misfortune of triggering the most unhinged side of the fandom (taekookers) and belonging to a group whose fandom has some of the most extreme rivalries with ARMY, and so many from her fandom worked to disprove it as virulently as taekookers did. I consider Jennie an anomaly for that reason because there have been several examples over the years when nobody cared. For example when the dating rumors of Jimin with Seulgi from Red Velvet happened, the most people did was speculate and move on...

*

I've rambled lol, but anyway, what I mean to say is that agree with you Anon.

[arizona2004]

Courts of Love and Hate. Chapter 1

Nyx x OC-Juniper(Tamlin’s daughter)

Note: in this Nyx was born later than is canon(I wanted Tamlin to have a son about Nyx’s age and that doesn’t make sense as canon) 

WC:3118

Request linked here   chapter 2

Nyx

I swallow a heavy sigh as my uncle Cas goes on about the Spring court. We just returned from the annual high lords meeting, where everyone was supposed to discuss finally restoring the sacred mountain in the middle so that meetings can be held there, but instead, half of the meeting was spent bickering and insulting one another, and I’m not proud to say the Night court was half of the problem.

I know there is a lot of history between the Night and Spring courts and that the Highlord Tamlin is largely at fault for hurting my family, but I can’t help but wonder about the unity between our courts. If there were peace between the north and south Prythian would surely have fewer enemies trying to invade. We should appear united. 

I interrupt my Uncle to say as much while we all finally collapse in the sitting room. I feel my father's gaze on me but I’m too focused on the look of pride on my mother's face to turn to him and see what he thinks of my thought.

“What are you suggesting Nyx? A peace treaty? It’s not like we’re at war with Tim Tam. We just don’t like him,” Uncle Cas says.

“I just think, maybe if we started acting more civilly, he would too, and our future generations can be at peace with one another.”

“There’s too much bad blood between us.”

“There doesn’t have to be. If we make peace now, then we can settle this. I don’t know the full history, and my children don’t need to know any of it. Nor do the Spring descendants.”

“I’d like to agree with you, Nyx,” my uncle Az speaks up, “but history is important.”

“Yeah,” Mor says, “what if centuries down the line, the Spring court attacks us, making claims about the past as reasoning because they didn’t keep to the deal, and your descendants have no understanding of the feud between the courts?”

I plop down on the couch between my parents, giving in because they’re right: my idea was stupid.

It wasn’t stupid, Nyx, my father speaks into my mind, it just wasn’t the solution.

Keep using that smart head of yours, and you'll figure it out one day. You’re the future of all of us; we believe in you, my mother chimes in before they both return to the conversation.

I, however, ignore my family and let myself get lost in thought. I double-check my mental walls, ensuring the only crack is the one I leave open for my parents to speak to me as they please but not look any further. 

I ignore them in favor of thinking of her. The one secret I keep from my family: Juniper.

She was at the meeting today. It took hell to convince her father, but he relented because “we aren’t discussing anything too unladylike,” apparently. That’s what she said in her most recent letter. I know she loves her father, but I also can tell he’s a misogynistic asshole who needs to get his head out of his ass. The only reason Juniper doesn’t hate him for it, I think, is because she doesn’t care much for court politics.

She worries about things like whether or not her shoes match her dress or if she accidentally made a spelling error in one of her letters. That’s what I love about her. She’s always worried about the little things and would rather be a writer than a Highlady. 

I asked her once what she would do if she wasn’t a princess, and apparently that was an easy question. She would be a writer; she’d write books and poems and articles. She’s good at it too. She asked me the same question, but I have no idea what I would want to do besides lead my people. I feel pride when I come up with a solution to help my parents fix a court issue and joy when I hold a sword in my hand or pull from the well of power in my gut. I don’t get that feeling with anything else the way Juniper gets it when writing. 

She says it’s because I was born to be a leader, but I’m not so sure about that. I’m not sure about most of the things I do when leading our court. My mother says that’s okay because it’s not like I need to lead the people by myself anyways, but my father was doing it at my age. I should know how to too, right? 

As the bitter feeling of anxiety settles in my gut, I shake my head and try to return to my happy distraction. Juniper. She was wearing a mint green dress with darker green accents decorating it. And dark green slippers to match. Her long blonde hair fell down her back in thick waves, framing her soft face in gold. Her green eyes found my blue ones as soon as she sat down beside her brother. She looked away quickly, but I couldn’t. I barely get to see the face behind the letters, I was entranced until my uncle spoke.

“It’s impolite to stare,” Azriel's voice was quiet over my right shoulder.

“Oh, he’s blushing!” Cassian piped up more to the left. “Think she’s pretty, do you?”

After that, I only risked an occasional glance in her direction. Our eyes didn’t lock again until the very end when we all got up to leave, and I could swear she smiled. Just a little bit, a small tip of the edge of her lips. The image is ingrained in my head. Green dress, matching shoes, blonde hair tucked behind her ear, dark eyes piercing mine, pink lips tipped up in the faintest smile. 

Kissable lips. Or so I imagine. The only time I was ever close enough to Juniper to kiss her I was a fumbling fifteen-year-old, and I accidentally fell on top of her in a dark garden. 

That was four years ago now, and since she responded to my letter two weeks after our clumsy meeting, I have been helplessly in love. And desperately trying to hide it, terrified of my family or hers ever finding out.

I know my parents wouldn’t care all that much, they would understand that you can’t help who you love, we don’t get to pick and choose. They wouldn’t judge her based on anyone's actions but her own. A scared little part of me, though, wants to keep her all to myself, away from the prying question and curious eyes of my aunts and uncles. 

She’s my secret, and I want to keep it that way, so when my uncle Cassian says my name in the same sentence as hers I panic.

“Nyx’s cheeks are all pink, he’s probably thinking of Princess Juniper again.”

“I am not!” I immediately defend myself, trying to figure out what everyone was talking about while I was daydreaming. 

“You seem awfully defensive,” he says, smirking.

I defer. “You can’t think about someone ‘again’ if you’ve never thought of them at all.

“You’ve never thought of the Spring Princess? Not once?”

I shake my head.

“Well, that’s concerning. How can you never think of anyone at all and still know who they are? Is your brain ticking properly?”

“You know what I meant, Cas! I don’t sit around thinking about her. Ever.”

“Okay, okay,” he says, putting his hands up. “There's no reason to get angry; I was just teasing.”

“I’m not angry,” I say, trying to calm down and hide the frustration building in my chest.

“Your hair’s on fire, sweetheart,” my mother chimes in.

Fuck. This happens sometimes. I’ll get mad or anxious, and what looks like black and white flames start burning to life atop my head. At first, my parents thought they were just dark and light shadows that would show up when I was emotional, but they quickly learned it was more like fire, hotter than any other fire known to fae. My father has the scars on a few of his fingers to prove it. 

Neither of my parents moves away from me, but I know they must feel the heat radiation from my head at this close distance. Dad places a comforting hand in between my shoulder blades while mom holds my hand. The flames flick out of existence.

“I’m sorry,” I say. “I was just frustrated.”

“It’s okay,” Cas starts to say but changes course as I stand, “don’t leave, Nyx. Everything's fine.”

I walk out of the room anyway and quietly walk up to my bedroom for the night. I hate losing control like that. 

Juniper

Falling onto my mattress, I feel light. Like I’m floating on a cloud. My heart is fluttering in my chest, and I can’t help the grin that stretches my face. I wrote to Nyx just before the meeting, so I can only assume he’ll write to me next. I just can’t wait for the letter to arrive. I’ll sit in my room all day tomorrow and wait for the black crow to arrive at my window if I must. I never thought such a dark bird could bring me so much joy. 

I’m still dreaming about what life with Nyx could be if our parents just got over their differences when a hand waves over my face. I sit up abruptly, not having noticed anyone enter, and incidentally get smacked in the face.

“Shit, Juniper! Are you okay?” my younger brother, “I didn’t mean to hit you, but honestly it was kinda your fault.” I glare at him. “What? You sat up into my hand.” 

“Whatever,” I grumble, rubbing my face. “What are you doing here?”

“We need to talk to you,” my older brother-Kai- says from the end of the bed.

“About what?”

“The meeting today,” Kai says, settling at the foot of the mattress with a firm expression.

“Yeah,” Oak adds, crossing his arms and attempting to mimic the glare. 

“What about it?” I ask, kicking off my shoes and avoiding their eyes. “It was rather boring and…unmannerly. The Highpeople insulted one another half the time. Especially our father.”

“You just don’t understand the history between our families. There’s so much hate and blood. The Night Court has done cruel and unthinkable things to us.”

“Well, if I don’t know the full history, then tell me, Kai, explain it so that I may understand.”

“Yeah!” Oak perks up at my side.

“No,” he says, remembering Oak is there. “Father would not want you to know, and you,” he directs his attention to Oak, “are far too young.”

“I’m twelve!” Oak grumbles. He and I are relatively close in age, only six years apart, while Kai is 14 years older than me. For fae, though, that’s still pretty close. 

“This is not what we came here to discuss. We’ll table this conversation for another time,” which just means he’s never going to bring it up again, and it will not be discussed.

“I thought this was what we came to discuss. The Night court being evil and all that?” Oak asks while scooting more onto the bed, pushing me over.

“Well, sort of, yes. Juniper, we couldn’t help but notice, at the meeting, you noticing the Night Prince.”

“No, that’s not right,” Oak interrupts, “I noticed him; he’s hot. Juniper was ogling him!”

Kai starts to speak up to tell Oak not to say things like that, but I interrupt him, “I was doing no such thing!” I defend. “He was just sitting right across from me. I couldn’t help but see him every time their Highlord or Lady spoke.”

“Hmm,” is Kai’s only response while piercing me with a glare that makes me want to spill all of my secrets. I swallow the lump in my throat, though, and force my body to relax. “Whatever the case was, we came here to tell you you ought to stay away from him.”

“He’s bad news, so don’t get any romantic thoughts,” Oak adds, pointing at me sternly.

“If you are thinking about romance, I’m sure father would let a nice spring lord court you. Many of them ask about you.”

“I’m not looking to find a husband right now,” I tell Kai sternly, “Certainly not with any of the lords.”

“Why ‘certainly not with any of them’ they are good males.”

“I’m not attracted to any of them. Romantically or otherwise.”

Kai's cheeks pink slightly as he looks at me with one of his stern, protective expressions, “You ought not be attracted to anyone otherwise unless already romantically.”

Of course, he would be naive enough to think I only feel romantic attraction. “I can be attracted to whoever I please. Besides, it’s not entirely my choice, more of a bodily response.”

Kai goes even redder. I’m sure he cannot fathom why he is having this conversation with me. “Juniper, you cannot-”

“Relax Kai. I said I felt attraction, not that I act on it. Besides, I don’t want to.”

“Good. You shouldn’t,” he says sternly and thoroughly. I know part of it is to protect me. I wonder if he’s also insisting because I’m a woman, and ‘it wouldn’t be proper’. He’s hypocritical like Father in that way sometimes. I hate it.

“What are we even talking about?” Oak asks, slightly confused. “I thought there was only one form of attraction.”

“And what kind was that?” I ask curiously.

“The one that means you like someone,” he says helplessly. A smile quirks my lips, and I notice one on Kai’s too.

“There is the attraction that means you want to court someone. And then there is the attraction that means you want to-” Kai stops, searching for the right words, but Oak offers a suggestion of his own.

“Fuck them?” 

I choke on air, a blush running up my neck, while Kai turns ten shades of red. “Where did you learn a phrase like that?” he asks.

“Heard some of the guards talking about it,” Oak supplies, which I’m sure upsets Kai. He’s tried to keep Oak as sheltered as possible. Kai is somewhat like our father but tries to keep as far from being like him, I’m not sure why, but he seems to want to keep Oak a happy faeling for as long as possible. 

“Come on, Oak,” Kai says, pulling our little brother from the bed. “This is not a topic I planned on discussing with you yet, but if I must, then so be it, but it is not for our sister's ears.”

“Okay!” Oak jumps to attention, happy to learn what it means to ‘fuck’ and I say nothing, knowing it’s for the best to let Kai think I know nothing about sex. 

That night I can’t help but lay in bed a little late, my thoughts running back to what Kai said earlier and the insults exchanged at the meeting. What happened between our courts?

Eventually, I fall asleep and wake early in the morning to a slight pecking on my stomach. I open my eyes to find a crow sitting on me. This isn’t the first time this has happened, so I don’t panic, I just untie the letter from its ankle and watch the bird fly away. 

A smile quirks as I open the letter and remember what I wrote to Nyx after that happened the first time. Your bird rudely woke me this morning. He sat on me and pecked me awake before dawn.

His response made me laugh. It always does. Whenever I’m outside, and a letter arrives, your bird sits on my head and tries eating my hair.

I’m still not sure I believe him, but it makes me laugh anyway. I open his newest letter, not bothering to even roll out of bed. He goes on for pages about how lovely I looked at the meeting. I can’t help the blush or the feeling of pride that fills me. I spent days planning my look; I’m over the moon that he liked it.

He answers questions from my last letter and doesn’t mention anything about the meeting beyond how happy he was to see me again. I can’t stop thinking about the feud between our courts, though. So after I respond to everything else in his letter, and mention how dashing he looked yesterday, I bring it up. It’s just a few questions. I’m sure he understands I probably know a lot less than him about the history, and I’m curious as to what his court's side of it is. 

I call over a Cardinal and tie the note to its leg before releasing it with directions to Nyx. Then I form a plan for breakfast while dressing. My lady's maid comes in mid-way through me getting ready and doesn’t even bother to scold me for getting ready without her; she gave up on that years ago. Instead, she picks up where I left off and sends me down for breakfast with my father and brothers. 

I sit through the beginning of our meal quietly, as Kai and father speak about something, and work up the courage to ask my questions. When silence fills the room with the end of their conversation I know it’s probably the only chance I’ll get.

“Father, I was hoping to ask a question,” I say before I can chicken out.

“Yes?” 

“How- how did the former Highlord, before you, die?” he stops and looks at me shocked and probably annoyed by my asking.

“Why would you ask a question like that?”

“I only noticed it wasn’t in the history books I have. Several of the other Highlords’ deaths are mentioned, but not his.”

“It is not in the books you learn from. He died with the rest of my family: my brothers and mother. Killed by the current Highlord of the Night Court and his father”

“How did his father die?” I ask before I can stop myself. 

“I killed him,” he snaps, struggling to reign his anger in. I should stop asking questions, I know I should. And the look on Kai’s face is begging me as much.

“But why would they kill your family?”

He freezes at that question, staring at the food on his plate for a few moments before looking up and piercing me with a cold stare, “Because they wanted to, Juniper. And the Night court thinks they’re entitled to everything they want. Stray away from thinking about them!” he growls, making me tense in my chair. “You’re dismissed. Go to your room.” I don’t hesitate to stand and practically run from the dining hall. 

[lemme-just-oops]

Can you do the Arcana Twilight boys reacting to mc who loves giving them affection but when they get affection they cry because they are the one who always gives affection please?

Hope this isn't too much! Have a great day!

Alpheratz: This giant can be lazy, and likes his personal space. But even he knows to show appreciation to those he holds dear. When he realizes that he just made you tear up, he believes that he insulted you without realizing. Asks what the matter is and will softly wipe away every tear.

Arcturus: He will not leave you alone until you understand that you are worthy of being loved and appreciated. The road there will be long and exhausting, but he will make sure you give yourself the positive attention that you need, every day.

Pollux: NO. He will fight your tears away by hugging you so tightly, your body will stop functioning for the entire time. Sends you motvational quotes every few days because they help him with his confidence and may help you learn to see your worth too.

Sirius: He understands in what environments you will blossom and which ones let you whither. He is not physically affectionate, but he knows how to make anyone believe his words. So when he tells you of how you are the morning rays in his darkest nights, they may cause you to tear up, but he will tell you that he means every word of it. Might also guide you in a different direction in life, where even the people around you will treat you positively, but he would never confess that he does this.

Spica: Every evening at 18:30, you are to meet him from now on and just listen to him as he tells you all the things he is proud of. Even if it is just small things that do not mean a lot to you, he notices and he wants you to know how wonderful your uniqueness is. And with that set schedule, he will have you cry but get used to being shown affection, while also able to rant on about you.

Vega: He is really sorry for making you cry, and will hold back for a moment. Asks you if you are uncomfortable and if you want him to take a step back, just in case you feel overwhelmed and need space for yourself. Even if you assure him that everything is fine, he will take it slow. Telling you that you look better one day, buying you something another. He hates seeing you cry, even if they are tears of joy, and wants to avoid thism

[Author notes]

I wrote these ones first, but then I realized that I misread the prompt. But take them as bloopers.

Alpheratz: Him and crying? As unlikely as it sounds, it does happen on occasion, though usually he can teleport away before anyone sees. But this time he does not, and he certainly tries not to hide it either. His cheeks just rub against yours and he sobs between all he is saying, while the tears rub against your cheeks.

Arcturus: DO YOU KNOW HOW MUCH HE NEEDS THIS?! This man has always been there for everyone, smiling from ear to ear just to make their day even the tiniest bit better. But has anyone ever shown the same to him? Has anyone ever lifted the burdens he swallowed for everyone else's sake? No. So as soon as he cries, he will not stop until the exhaustion takes over and sleep finally rests him.

Pollux: This man does not cry, he claims. That morning, he cried because snakes do not have arms. He barely ever cries from tragedies, such as loss. They just turn him numb. But he does cry from joy quite often. So, when you show him the affection you feel, he gets teary eyes, but will not cry fully.

[writingbyricochet]

Writer Q&A Tag Game

Thank you so much @mthollowell-writes for the tag! I loved reading your answers and this was fun to fill out :)

1) What motivates you to write?

Mostly my mind cannot stop thinking of Situations. Whether they're for characters from my current TV/film hyperfixations or my own OCs, writing is the best way for me to get it out of my system and the artistic form I'm the best at.

2) A line/short snippet of your writing that you are most proud/happy of. If not maybe share a line of someone else's work you love (just please credit them)

From Where Paradise Died and Lived:

Sophie was just about draw her hand away, and perhaps he felt the pressure lessening, for then he brought his own hand up to cover hers, to keep her from moving it. He held her hand there, his fingers curling just barely under hers, not with any force but with a lightness she had just been administering to him. And underneath it, a reassurance that seemed to communicate he wanted something that quickened her heart. She knew if she proceeded here, she would be crossing a line she had thought she wouldn’t cross for a long time yet. She finally raised her gaze to meet his, and all sense escaped her—his eyes looked like the way she felt, all the encouragement she needed. A little bit scared, a little bit in love, she kissed him.

3) Which OC makes you smile every time you think/talk about them and what are they like?

Honestly, I haven't gotten to write a lot of him yet, but I have a soft spot for Fendley. He believes passionately in the Velitovan cause and wants to fight for its independence...but he's also the biggest homebody and hates being away from Merity. The two parts of his personality are just direct contradictions to each other, it makes me laugh.

4) What process of writing do you enjoy the most?

Character building: creating a backstory, personality, aesthetic, all that good stuff

5) What part of writing do you think you are the best at? (Yes stroke your own ego it's okay)

Describing inner turmoil? When I look at the passages I'm most proud of, they all have to do with an internal dialogue of some kind, usually in a situation with heightened tension or vulnerability where a character has a lot going on in their mind.

6) What is something in the writeblr community is most enjoyable?

Making friends with everyone! The support system is a huge motivator and definitely something that keeps me going.

7) A writing tool/device you use that helps you with writing? (It could be speech to text, a writing program etc)

Scrivener, my beloved. I was working in Evernote for way longer than I ever should have and was getting just so sick of it that I finally took the plunge to get Scrivener. Night and day comparison. There are so many great tools and functions and I love being able to have one document for a WIP and its outline, characters, worldbuilding, everything. It's definitely pricey up front, but in the long run worth it since it's just a one-time purchase. Highly recommend giving it a trial run to anyone interested.

8) A piece of worldbuilding that you like in your own story? (It could be the magic system, a particular place in the story, a law etc)

I really love the country of Velitova, especially the lands beyond the Idylwild. In-universe they're written off as being sort of rural, but the nature out there is so beautiful and pristine. Huge rolling hills, a huge lake surrounded by flowering trees, cliffs facing a wild ocean...yes.

9) What piece of advice would you say to encourage others to write if they are having a rough patch?

Stop writing: Whether it's a for a few days or a few months, taking a break from my WIPs and re-setting my mind whenever I am struggling is always the best solution.

Return to worldbuilding: I've seen a lot of people discuss how we get desensitized to the cool things in our WIPs after a while. Creating more cool things that will be new to me as well often makes my WIP exciting again.

Get outside: Traveling always inspires me, but I find even walking around your neighborhood can be so helpful! I especially walking among trees in the fall, that air of melancholy during that time of year just gets me.

10) Tag some people whose works you love/have been your biggest supporters

Love to @sugar-phoenix, @macabremoons, @orphicpoieses @awordchemist @moonlitinks (all of whom should take this as a gentle tag to answer the Q&A yourself!), and special shout out to my IRL best friend @canofpeaches who always goes feral whenever I send her a WPDL snippet (hope you did not combust reading the one above) <3

[mbti-enemies]

hey, guys! fellow INFP here, I used to have this loathe towards my own type (slash myself in general) too a few years ago

I think it came mostly from some stereotypes I used to hear a lot of back then, stuff like "crybaby", "too sensitive", "manipulative", "dramatic", "self-centered", "selfish", "loonies", "antisocial", "illogical" or things like "INFP's forgive but rarely forget", "INFP's moral standard are too high/unreal", that "we're too obsessed with idealism", "we're stuck in the past", "we victimise ourselves all the time"

and these comments used to really get to me, I'd overthink it for an unhealthily amount of time, specially because I was in a really dark place back then and I'd see myself relating to most of these definitions. I couldn't even focus on all the plenty of good things people had to say about me because when you hate yourself it's is just hard to believe in any perspective that's different from yours.

but then I started working on it, I was so done with hating myself and surrounding myself with toxicity all the time, I'd prioritise everyone else but me, I'd neglect my own happiness and needs until I had a breakdown, pushed everyone away and started this cycle all over again.

It's mentally exhausting and you can't take care of anyone if you don't take care of yourself first, you must always be your first priority and offer yourself the same kindness that you offer to other people.

there's this quote from a book that says "we accept the love we think we deserve", and it's true! once you realise all the good things there is about you and how lovable you are, no one can convince you otherwise, all you need is your own validation, be happy with who you are, clap your own baby steps and stop damning yourself for every tiny mistake you've done, and I promise you'll attract all the good people who will love and accept you for exactly who you are!

people who won't think of your sensitivity as "drama"

you are allowed to feel, you're not "too much", you're allowed to be overly happy and excited over the smallest things, you're allowed to cry when you feel like it even when it seems like "there is no reason to", you're allowed to feel pain over things that you thought you'd be over by now because it's been so long, you're allowed to take time for yourself, to try new hobbies, you're allowed and you should set up boundaries! you're allowed to cut people off when you don't feel good around them, you're allowed to use your voice and stand your ground.

take care of yourself, drink water, eat everyday, try journaling, take long showers once in a while, listen to music, look yourself in the mirror and tell that person looking back at you that they're worthy of every good thing in this life even if you don't believe it (yet). and if all you did today was survive, I'm proud of you for that, and so you should be! I promise you things will get better eventually even if it doesn't feel like it rn. you're amazing and shouldn't accept mediocrity when you are this beautiful human being in and out <3

I'm not perfect and neither are you, there are some days that I see myself falling back into old habits, days when I don't feel lovable, when the highs feel too high and the lows too low, days when I disassociate way more than it'd be considered healthy, etc etc, but you know what? things always get better at some point.

I now have friends I can always count with!

I force myself to share my problems even when I want to stick myself in a cave and never come out again because the world suddenly feels like a horrible place to live in, and I feel like no one cares about me because everyone is probably too busy with their own problems. I promise you there are people who care, you just need to allow them to love you because believe it or not, you are lovable. let them know you need help, or just a hug sometimes.

and you know what's funny? some of my closest friends are also INFP's and I'm so happy that they exist! here are some amazing traits about INFP's: (based on my own experience with them and being one myself, because you're allowed to see and knowledge your valuable traits... I know , shocking)

INFP's can be: empathetic, generous, open-minded, creative, passionate, thoughtful, deep, carrying, intense and vulnerable in the best ways, so very understanding, poetic, kind-hearted etc etc etc

you guys are amazing and I'm very proud of you! (this is for every one who needs to hear it, even if you're not an INFP) <333 have a good way, a great week and an even better life!

(For the earlier infp askers)

Infp, this is the sweetest, truest thing. thank you so so much for taking the time to share this <333

HEAR HEAR

also I think this is gorgeous advice even if you’re not an infp, if you’re struggling with low self esteem, and literally everything else

[docholligay]

Shamash Questions: The last batch (I think)

Tell me if I’m wrong ahaha.

Your favorite bit of writing this year! All three winners got three points, thank you everyone who put in an answer for this, they made me feel good. I know most of you are here for the liveblogging, so it means a lot to me that you read my creative shit also.

The retelling of the Snow Queen. Partly because that was one of my absolute favorite stories as a kid, so I'm generally a sucker for it, but also because I really love your Usagi in it. I know you generally don't love Usagi, but you took her sweetness and sunny, indomitable disposition and it fits so perfectly with that story that I would have thought she was your favorite if I didn't know better.  -- Lindsay Thank you! I’m hoping that with the restructuring of my time in January, I can finish the damn thing next year

I believe it’s called Mean Time, but if I have that wrong the one with Tracer’s nightmare of being out of time. The tension as she slowly realizes what’s happening is brilliant and that “only a second even if it lasts for days” before she cuts her throat is just perfect. Also it’s a different mindset then Tracer is usually portrayed in your writing while feeling completely in character. I always appreciate how your characters are continually affected by trauma even as they continue to grow and change. --automatuck9  Thank you so much! I really loved and felt so good about how many people enjoyed that one.

Lena and her little orange door. I love your writing, it makes my energy spike every time, leading me to want to draw at like, the most inconvenient times lmao (work, shopping, funeral, you know.) That piece of writing got into me, and I was so taken with it, I had to immediately get my little phone pen out and start scribbling notes, half not caring if they were legible; I just had to get the damn feelings out!! I love Lena, I love Hana, and the whole scene between them, the bubbly, the ham, the offhanded "congrats! Have a sammy." It was so good, I reread it several times to make sure I'd gotten everything.  --Rhio Oh thank you! This was also one of my favorite things I wrote this year, I felt like it really hit that hilaritragic thing that I like to do, and love to hit. I was proud of it. Anyway, Lena’s orange door is one of my beloved little character details, and it’s one of the things I have her family leave, even when someone else moves into the house. it just should be orange!

kvetching:

This is a lovely place, but the bathroom sinks. Don't get me wrong, the style is lovely. Simple, functional, but a little more geometric and appealing than the standard basin. But who makes a sink flat? Sinks needs to be sloped, so the water runs into the drain. It is the reason for the half spherical basin. These sinks are completely flat. The water near the drain, drains. Wonderful. The water in the front corners though? It sits. And any dirt in the sink? It sits too. The sink requires twice as much cleaning as a correctly sloped sink. Three times as much when the cats are sleeping in it. Who's bright idea was this! It makes no sense! -- pounce, 1 point Who the fuck DOES make a flat sink?

Fucking caramel is a curse set upon us by the gods for daring to reach for ambrosia and failing and I am never making it again. (Until 10 years have passed at which point I will have convinced myself that it's not really that bad but, future self, listen to me carefully, look deep into your past self's eyes, you are fucking wrong, it is that bad, and I hate you in advance for what you're about to put us both through.) (I don't consider this petty but I'm currently suffering trauma from making caramel last night and I don't care, I'll take any excuse to talk about how fucking awful caramel is.) -- Geeky (p.s. Thank you so much for your video on the subject. I say down and watched it after our multiple failed attempts and the attempt after was the one that finally worked.) , 2 points And you’re welcome!! I’m so glad it helped.

I just cleaned my shower. This is a task that I, and all humans, must do with frustrating regularity and frequency. And why? This is the portion of my home in which I do my cleanest activities, namely, cleaning my body, an instrument which is generally not particularly dirty. I am not covered in filth or slime; I am not the host of Dirty Jobs, nor do I have one. I don't even have a hobby which places that extra grime upon my person. I shower every day, and the worst thing I am regularly washing down the drain is a build up of dead skin cells and shed or shaved hair. My drain moves water quickly and none sits on the bottom of my shower. And yet? Scummy build up along every flat surface unless I scrub them every few days. The worst offender is of course the floor. This does makes sense in many ways as all water and body runoff must hit the floor and pass over it before reaching the drain. But what is on the floor of the shower which encourages tiny bits of bacteria, skin cells, and soap laden water to remain, unwelcome guests continuing their stay and doing unspeakable things in my space, things which will give birth to those most unholy of demons: soap scum and mildew? Texturing. Yes, the very thing which prevents me from falling in the shower and breaking something embarrassing, is also the thing which brings the most possibility for bacterial growth. Why can we not produce a flooring which prevents both the need to let emergency services see you naked and also does not trap body runoff water? We have sent people to the moon. We have created a device which rewarms McDonald's fries and makes them taste good. Why can we not make maintaining a clean bathroom without constant scrubbing an easy and cheap endeavor? My elbows do not have enough grease to keep this cheap textured lino clean, I am not a thirteen year old boy with constant masturbation muscle in my forearms! -- Lindsay, 3 points. Perfection. Hilarious. No notes.

If Fareeha, Lena, Angela, Hana, or Winston were magical gs (girls/ gorillas) what would their transformation yell be?  only 4 of you answered, so you all got a point! (at least)

Fareeha- Combat Armor, Lock On! Hana-MEKA Tokki, Hop In! Angela- Valkyrie Suit, Fly Out! Lena- Chronal accelerata’, Dash Up! Winston- Gorilla Tech, Turn On! All together- Overwatch mechanical G’s, roll out! -- Beefsalad33

Raptora Online! The Cavalry is Here (look I know it's the obvious, easy answer but it's also the correct one so there!)! Let there be mercy (but said in Swedish)! Who's ready for trouble (in Korean)! Science! (Yes I cheated but it's right in my head) --Furi My favorite part about this is that Angela is Swiss, but I canjust imagine her being given this and being too kind to correct someone so she just learns to say it in Swedish

Lena strikes a dramatic pose, signaling to her fellow heroes. It goes quiet, and she turns around to look at her second. "Pssst. Fareeha. That's your cue." "I'm not doing it." "What do you mean you aren't..." "I said I'm not doing it! It's demeaning!" "We can't transform unless you say it!" "Then I guess we'll have to fight monsters with our collection of high powered military hardware!" "You know it doesn't work that way. Now do it, or you'll risk people getting hurt." Fareeha sighed and held her hands up and with a very sarcastic voice said "It's time for hopes and dreams to save the day." Lena smiled as the transformation began. "See? Was that so hard?" Fareeha grumbled. "Gonna see if I can change these words...." --Shavedjudomonkey you got three points for making me literally laugh Aloud with Then I guess we’ll have to fight monsters withour high-powered military hardware”

Winston: By the power of friendship! And science! Hana: Systems, initialize! Game on! Fareeha: Justice... shall be served! Lena: Call sign Tracer, reporting in! Angela: May medicine guide me! -- Seolh

[lilikags]

reo thing

There’s a part of this fandom who believes that Reo had everything he wanted, growing up. Well, he’s rich. He could buy everything he wanted. Well then, does that make sense? To a lot of people, yes- after all, what else could he want that he could not get? Wasn’t he the guy who always said “Get what you want”? 

But here’s the thing: what did he want? It’s easy to think that he just wanted to be popular- to get good grades, to win competitions, to have everyone’s support. That’s what he did, that’s what he was to the people in Hakuho. But were those actions really because he wanted it, or because he was told to do it? Now, he’s pretty much every parent's dream child- with that many achievements, any parent would be proud. He always looked like he was on that path, the one for success and always having every resource he could possibly touch. But did he want that, or did his parents want that? You tell me. 

What might be really hard to consider is that Reo thinks everybody hates him- so he can’t trust anyone. Now, think about it: when you have billions of dollars at your disposal, do any of your peers think that you’re “one of them” or “relatable”? No, your money would solve all of their problems and you wouldn’t have their problems, so you’re not “one of them”. They want something from you- your money. It’s not rocket science to figure out that the more money you have, the more stuff people want from you and the more likely it is that people will suck up to you to get into that tap of money for their own interests while still hating you out of your ability to solve their problems. (In other words, they hate because they’re jealous)

He’s an outcast. He’s something else. He’s a genius. That’s what everyone believes- after all, how could he be at the top every single time? How could he have the top grades, the good personality, the looks on top of that, the background even? Now, with the grades thing, there’s a secret that can result in this: teaching your kid early. You take away the time people say “Oh, kids should play” and turn it into “I’m teaching my kid how to read so that he will be ahead of the class”. Kids are given time to grow emotionally and socially when they play, but it is highly likely that Reo’s parents had him be taught math, language, business, etc. instead. If you start with basic concepts from a young age and keep at it every day at lunch and dinner for years, you’ll get pretty far. Combine that with putting classes in his schedule, and he’s basically already studying hours and hours at a young age. He already had a leg up, and with a good schedule, and tutors to help him understand better, it is realistic that he learned everything in a steady pace with his natural intelligence to help him forward. He earned confidence, he wasn’t really held back by self-doubt in terms of his ability to deliver results. That’s why he has a hard time accepting loss. It’s gifted kid syndrome- and he didn’t know how to not be more than “perfect”. 

About his emotional growth- he has basically had very little emotional growth since just about forever. I imagine Reo to be a relatively well-behaved kid ever since he was young, and if there was any first message he came across first, it was to do what his parents said. It was obedience- and in order to do that, he had to shut his own emotions down, and put on a mask. That mask was carried with him everywhere. People are individualists but also value fitting in- they want to do what they want, but they don’t want to be labeled as an outcast. There are people who prioritize one or the other, and Reo chose conformity. Conform to what? He definitely didn’t conform to the other people at the school; he was so different that everyone was jealous. That didn’t matter to him; he conformed to expectations. People talk- putting his parents in the spotlight of this discussion. He has a natural intelligence- that allows him to go far. He was well behaved compared to kids his grade. What parent wouldn’t brag about how well they brought up a child like that? Then, based on what people hear, they have expectations too. “Because this kid’s a genius, he can do anything!” “He’s so well behaved for his age, I’m sure he’ll become a fine gentleman when he’s older!” But he’s so lost in the mask that he forgot what his real face looked like. In fact, he might’ve not even taken any real good look at it, because he’s always been conforming to the expectations. That’s why, when he discovers Nagi and soccer, he finally discovers a part of himself for the first time and he loves it more than anything. That’s why he’s so desperate to cling to that, why he’s so clingy to Nagi, when Nagi “left him” for Isagi in the second selection. 

In fact, Reo had so much of everything (material) that he didn’t want any of it. Seems a little paradoxical- if you have everything, shouldn’t that just cover everything you want? Theoretically, it should, but think about it like this: what are you going to do with all of that extra stuff? It’s just laying around, something should be done with it. But he didn’t know what to do with it. There’s a point where having too many things becomes a burden rather than a useful tool- and he reached that point. Just because someone is rich, or born rich, doesn’t mean that they are wasteful. They may spend more than others, but it was early on that Reo learned that money was a tool, and he knew he’d better use it well.

obligatory @ss-slep tag

[frostytundra01]

Transmedicalism, a Retrospective From Someone Who Used to Be There

Transmedicalism doesn't really make any sense.

Which is funny because this is coming from someone who used to be in these kinds of spaces. It was before I realized I was trans, a whole can of worms in and of itself, and I didn't realize partially due to the spaces I was in.

There are better videos and posts on this with mounds of evidence and papers and whatnot so don't take this post as your only sourse but this was on my mind for a while and I had to get it out.

It's such a sad state of being when you boil down being trans to the suffering people face. Not everyone has dysphoria because for some people their bodies are fine, they just happen to be a guy or a girl. Others aren't anything, both or something else entirely. It doesn't matter how you're trans because there's no right way to be trans. Gender is complicated and acting like it isn't really only hurts people.

This wasn't what I always believed, and this isn't what everyone believes either even if it's true.

Honestly, a lot of people would call me a trender now even though I have some pretty bad dysphoria. Mostly because my gender isn't binary, I support all trans people and I don't pass. I don't even really care about passing too much, I feel good when people call me a guy but I like skirts, I like looking cute and that doesn't change the fact that I am a guy. Cis men can do the same things and we don't berate them like we do trans men, mostly anyways.

Even I probably would have made fun of myself as a kid because I was in all of these spaces. Anyone who was on YouTube in 2018 knows how toxic the community was. I was really young back then and just figuring out I wasn't CitHet though at the time I thought I was Cis. My parents weren't supportive and I didn't have anyone to talk to so I used YouTube for escapism. I loved Kalvin Garrah because at the time he was the only trans youtuber I knew existed. I ate up every single piece of gay media and because of that I fell down the Truscum pipeline.

None of those spaces are really happy, it's hard to be when your entire identity as a trans person is built around hating other trans people. Anyone who didn't have dysphoria, anyone who didn't fit in were the scum of the earth and 'trenders'.

The funny thing (or sad thing really) is that a lot of people they bullied actually fit into the boxes they assigned for 'good' trans people. They had dysphoria, they were binary. The only difference was the fact that they looked trans. If you didn't look cis, if you even touched the color pink, if you didn't praise the cis overlords, the cis gods, you were a trender. Honestly it took saying you supported all trans people to be called one. Then once you were a trender you were the enemy, you didn't deserve to live, you didn't deserve to exist because you were faking something, even if you weren't. Breden, Milo, everyone else deserved so much better than being bullied, for some of them bullied off the internet. They didn't get that though and that breaks my heart that some of these people even died because other trans people hated them so much.

I've even seen someone say that if you were proud of being trans that made you a trender and isn't that just sad? Where are we at when not hating yourself means you're lying about your own expiriences. Sure for a lot of people being trans isn't easy, but that doesn't mean you have to hate yourself at all times. Why should we wallow in sorrow when we could be happy? Why do you want to take away trans joy?

The thing is, even if some of these people are faking, at the end of the day who does it actually hurt? There are a lot of arguments to this but most of them don't really make sense.

One of the main things I see are that fake trans people are hogging up trans health care. And I get this! Surgury isn't cheap, hormones aren't cheap and a lot of times there feels like a limited amount. But the thing is that there isn't, it's just that we aren't visible and Cis people don't want to put any effort into helping us. By deviding the community you're really just making it easier for Cis people to deny us, making it harder for everyone to get healthcare and laying down while our rights are being taken away.

We can see the effects of this aready, florida, texas, everywhere it is getting harder and harder to get healthcare and a lot of this is because we're so busy fighting each other that we're not fighting for our collective rights. If we said fuck it and actually worked together maybe we wouldn't have had to worry about this.

Another argument I see is the classic 'if they transition their going to give themselves dysphoria' which is kind of weird since like, not every trans person wants to transition? Those that do often feel euphoria from having their bodies match their brain. Others just change how they look outwardly and that's enough to feel like themselves. Why does it matter what genatallia people have? You don't actually know if they have dysphoria, you are not them and do not get to decide what is best for them. Even if transitioning isn't what's best for them why would bullying them off the internet help anything?

The last argument pretty much boild down to 'you'll make us look wierd in front of the cis' and like, who cares? Why do you want to be a cis bootlicker? Why do you want to uphold a white patriarchal version of gender like it's the default?

You aren't getting any points by being a Cis persons lapdog. You do not get extra points for being a token trans. It will not save you from the trans genocide, when all of us are killed, when all of us are dead because we looked different, because we look trans, because we aren't binary, they aren't going to love you. You are not suddenly going to sit at their table because you're one of the 'good ones'. They don't respect you, they respect what you bring them, a talking point, a symbol of not being a bad person because one trans person likes you. When you are done, when your token is spent in the vending machine of cis power you'll be killed just like the rest of us. You aren't their friend, they don't love you. They just want to use you until your use is up.

It took a long time for me to learn all this, it took a long time to accept myself as a trans man and an even longer time to realize I'm a bit more than that but I'm so much happier now. I was miserable as a Transmed because I hated myself and everyone around me. I don't know if this will reach anyone or change any minds but I put it out there so now I can stop thinking about this. If you're a transmed I hope you can at least think about this and maybe stop bullying other trans people.

Anyways, peace out.

-Tundra

[tobiashwn]

s̠҉͍͊ͅc͕͗ͤ̕̕R͉̜̎͡͠Ḛͭ̉̇͟ā̤̓̍͘M͉̅ͮ͒ͤs̠҉͍͊ͅ ỉ͔͖̜͌N̺̻̔̆ͅT̨͈͗̌ͥo̯̱̊͊͢ T̨͈͗̌ͥḣ̖̻͛̓Ḛͭ̉̇͟ A̷͙ͭͫ̕B̩͎͍̾ͅy҉̃̀̋̑s̠҉͍͊ͅS̵̙͕̀̃

hello everyone ! it has been a long time running since i’ve been back on the tumblr rp scene ! i am here with my boy ‘tobias moon aka toby’. i’ll say the traits on his graphic should be a dead giveaway to what type of insufferable asshole he is and proudly lives as. check the tldr below! i’ve been horrid at plotting lately so what i will offer up front are random starters for the plots below if anyone interested, just comment with the number !

also always forget this part,,, here’s his profile and background ! everything else is wip rn ( plots and wanted connections ). 

rich, smart, handsome, what else do you need?

tobias moon, also goes by toby, that goodlooking guy, asshole, you name it

go ahead and deny it and say you hate him all you want, he knows deep down you like him and definitely had a crush on him at least once in your lifetime

born in machester, uk on august 15 1995 ( if the leo sun doesn’t give a sure fire sign idk what will )

currently 27 years old and thriving at his age

his parents have continued to reside in manchester while he’s lived in hwando for the past few years for his studies in geumdal village, hanok 102

graduate student and choose to major in defense against the dark arts with a minor potions

proud jujak house representative

captain of the jujak quidditch team and competitive beater

despite being a fucking haughty bitch, where he talks big he walks as well. doesn’t back down from a challenge and knows he’s good at what he does ( highlight confident )

plans to go pro with quidditch

the moon family and the matriarch

comes from a long line of prominently pureblood dark wizards

his father was speculated to be a death eater, however, this has never been proven or confirmed

mother is famous fashion designer in the wizarding world

despite the family’s history with dark arts, they maintained a suspiciously powerful influence within sections of the wizarding world that keep them rich and affluent to this day

after the passing of his grandfather, his grandmother became the head of the family line ( referred to as the matriarch )

the matriarch: as any scary intimidating grandmother with only expectations she can meet is

has disowned relatives and her own children who have turned against the family or disgraced the moon name

has a tolerate-hate relationship with tobias 

although his mother is also pureblood, she came from a much less noble family and the matriarch has never truly accepted her

when tobias does something good, she acknowledges him as his father’s son

and when he does something she doesn’t approve of, he’s known as his mother’s child

like the back of your hand

currently on the island for ulterior motives ( you can’t actually believe he’s there just for his education can you? )

instructed by his father to learn everything he can about the island and the hwangmun organization hence furthering his graduate studies into defense against the dark arts

no better way to learn about the enemy than pretending to be one of them right?

his education and quidditch are just to pass the time and make things easier

the matriach resides on a magically protected mansion sobaeksan near danyang, away from major cities 

tobias frequently visits ( aka heeds her every call ) 

eyes on me

okay felt the need to make this bec it’s actually a big part of his character

despite being a haughty deviant, tobias is actually very serious about his gameplay, strategies, and reputation as the captain of the jujak quidditch team

he’s not unfair but will hold you accountable

will not lecture or be stern but that’s because he expects everyone to act like actual adults with brains. give him respect and he gives you respect. give him trust and he gives you trust. 

if you ignore practice, his words or instructions as captain, or do anything to jeopardize anyone on the team or the team in general, he will put his foot down and you will deal with the consequences ( he will bench you or put you on suspension )

he doesn’t go out of his way to intimidate his teammates of these expectations. they are what they are - expectations that everyone should be aware of

in all, can promise he’s a good leader and captain whether you’re actually friends with him or not

wanted connections 

people who don’t get along with him ( whether it be because he doesn’t deny his family background or because he’s an asshole there’s so many reasons pick one lol )

neighbors from hanok village!

old roommate from jujak dorm days?

quidditch teammates ( hmu let’s figure out dynamics! )

you have/had a crush on him? and he openly flirts with you with this knowledge ( or without :shrug emoji: )

tutors you in dada or potions

he’s loaned you money

actual friends? lol

random starters

you’re rich... but you still eat at the school cafeterias? maybe this prompts tobias into taking you out to an expensive dinner ( probably him just showing off tbh )

you can’t stand him but you’re professor told you to get help from tobias for the subject your struggling in

you spill your drink on tobias and it stains his shirt... man oh man is it your unlucky day because that shirt was FUCKING expensive

you’re practicing spells and one backfires, almost hitting tobias but he deflects just in time... uh oh... will he believe you weren’t trying to attack him?

you’ve heard about tobias and his family but this is your first time actually running into him and interacting with him and wait... he’s actually kind of cute?

you’ve been studying in the grand library for a few hours and notice that tobias keeps staring at you... what the fuck stop sTARING

that’s all for now folks, i will update with official plots and connections when i get to those. if a random starter did not interest you and you drop a like, i will slithery slide into your dms later! if you read this far you’re a chump. i mean champ. IM JOKING REALLY PLEASE. will catch you guys on the flipside!!