#proximity to kakashi au

[itischeese]

Expanding on the Obito-is-smart-actually-he's-just-stupid-around-Kakashi AU from here, because it haunts me and I have many thoughts about it. (Note: while most of that can be interpreted as headcanon, and is an explanation of canon events, this post goes into an actual AU version, where canon events aren't followed, because I am gay and sad and cannot take it anymore.)

Normal Obito has an Actual Plan of things he wants to do when he becomes Hokage, including making sure no one clan can be discriminated against in law, building trade relations with other shinobi nations to create actual lasting alliances not built on war (like Kakashi post-canon lol), and actually doing something about the Hyuuga hierarchy stuff, with the help of Hiashi and Hizashi, who he's already created a sort-of-alliance with.

Obito-around-Kakashi is completely unable to articulate this, and instead ends up blurting out things like "fancy hat" and "people will like me," and looking like an indecisive fool who doesn't know what he's doing. Everyone who's interacted with Obito outside of Kakashi believes he can do it, and would do a good job. Unfortunately, Obito spends A Lot of time around Kakashi, including interacting with Most People, so the number who believe he'd make a good Hokage is... distressingly small.

One would think that, given he was able to function and activate a two-tomoe sharingan when Kakashi wasn't looking, he would be able to dodge the boulder fine while Kakashi was knocked out. Unfortunately, he'd just grabbed Kakashi to throw him out of the way, and without Protecting Kakashi being a direct motivator, holding Kakashi in his arms, even just to throw him out of the way, is enough to make Obito's brain stall completely for long enough to get canon'd.

Rin survives becoming a jinchuuriki because Obito trips and crashes wildly into the clearing when he sees Kakashi, and incidentally he ends up crashing into Rin just before she can jump in front of chidori. Unfortunately, Kakashi sees Obito and gets distracted long enough for an enemy to land a blow, and Obito, intelligence fully impaired by proximity to Kakashi, thinks Kakashi is dead. Mangekyo-activation and nigh-instantaneous death of every enemy shinobi in the vicinity ensues. And then Rin heals Kakashi. Because he's Not Dead.

The combination of passed-out Kakashi and Must-Protect-Precious-People allows Obito to tell Rin that Kushina's a jinchuuriki too (he got suspicious bc of the floating hair, and Kushina humored him when he asked), and her and Minato should be able to do something about the seal of the Sanbi. Needless to say, she's rather happy to stay alive and not have to horrifically traumatize one of her precious people.

[mixelation]

In the new AMAZING au, what does Kakashi think about obito? Is Kakashi....okay?

i think it's more fun if by the time tori's around, they're like.... friends. they have fun banter. kakashi is actively relieved when obito shows up to stressful situations when the stress is someone threatening kakashi

this time around obito is ~technically a genius~ but he's even worse at following orders. so early team 7 kakashi views him as a rival and respectable opponent but also as like... a fuck up. like what is obito even DOING 90% of the time. he's late all the time and he talks back to authority and he ignores orders and ugh ugh ugh

obito 4D chesses his way around the kannabi bridge incident so there's no singular moment of "and now we are bonded FOREVER" even though obito has considered just sticking a sharingan in kakashi to force that moment, and also like, offered it to kakashi a couple times. so i think it's a process of many years of forced into close proximity by shared missions where kakashi very gradually comes around to him. he gets used to obito being.... obito.... and sometimes views obito's hinge-free lifestyle as a boon. like, yeah kakashi WANTED to do something horrible to the guy who hit rin in the face with a kunai, he's not going to complain if obito hunts him down and sets him on fire even if the platoon captain said no??? sometimes he has to talk him down from doing something completely insane (like giving him his eyeball) but it's been ten years and obito hasn't hurt anyone kakashi actually cares about. so by the time they're both 22 kakashi is like "actually sometimes being a troll gets you want you want" and "yeah obito is a violent unhinged freak, but he's OUR violent unhinged freak" bc being violent and unhinged is MUCH less of a red flag for ninja. like no obito is not allowed to babysit naruto solo but also kakashi would trust him with his life

he IS kind of concerned about obito's interest in team 4? like, um. sensei...... do you know obito is uh........ like that................

(minato has been VERY CONCERNED about obito's sanity several times. but also obito is, you know, comically OP and Minato has spent over half his ninja career at war. he's not going to do an intervention, because why would you do anything to nerf one of your best guys? but obito's file does have seven thousand notes on it, and rin and kakashi's files also have notes about obito. for example that one time with kiri taught them that rin's safety has to be a priority on field missions because otherwise obito will go insane as our resident ultra talented medic-nin, just normal policy about saving the medic first folks nothing to see here)

[doobea]

♡‧₊˚ i got my eyes on you ೄྀ࿐ˊˎ ─ 1K MILESTONE EVENT

THANK YOU NOTE: hi hi i just want to give a big thanks to everyone who's stuck around for this long hehe i never would've imagined in a million years that i would be talking and making friends with some of the people here right now!! its been such a pleasure writing for you guys and its made me realized why i fell in love with writing in the first place - i love reading all the lil comments, love receiving asks about a particular story, and love love love when i somehow convert others into loving one of my fave characters hehe i know i've been on and off with certain things in recent months and that's primarily due to burn out and my personal life, but i hope that i can continue to share my creativity with you guys for the rest of this year and hopefully onto the next! that being said, let's get to the event...! || STATUS: CLOSED

EVENT: this will be a sfw character x reader event, with fics that'll range between 1k-5k max word count (it'll honestly be up to how i feel). reader will either be gender neutral or fem! based on your requests (it will automatically be gender neutral if there's no specification). below i've listed some tropes and you have free range of submitting between two/three tropes + a "tracklist" of my favorite characters!!

TROPES:

second chances

enemies to lovers

friends to lovers

college AU

coffee shop AU

hospital / medical AU

soulmate AU (specify or i pick)

streamer / esport AU

office romance

sport AU (ex: hockey, basketball, swim, etc.)

historical romance / period romance (specify era)

fake relationship

arranged marriage

slow burn

hurt / comfort

forced proximity

brother's best friend / best friend's brother

or you can suggest a trope/AU if it's not listed!! just has to be something that im comfortable with! (forgive me idk theres so many endless tropes my brain is fried...)

TRACKLIST:

choso kamo (hes my pookie, my everything, yum)

yuuji itadori (how can we not love him)

megumi fushiguro (with this treasure i summon...)

sukuna ryomen (i can explain,,,)

satoru gojo (kakashi 2.0)

sae itoshi (yea ig he's alright...)

rin itoshi (grumpy cat)

seishiro nagi (what a bum)

oliver aiku (scruffy, muddy man)

yoichi isagi (perfect boy next door vibes)

RULES:

as mentioned before, this event will be strictly SFW - i will not be accepting anything remotely NSFW.

im not entirely sure how many reqs will be sent in but i'll pick and choose whichever i want to start with first. im currently aiming to complete at least 5 milestone reqs.

please do not rush me, there is no specific timeframe for these to get done and, as a reminder, im doing this out of my own comfort :3

UM HAVE FUN WITH THIS GUYS HEHE AND THANK YOU AGAIN FOR YOUR ENDLESS SUPPORT AS ALWAYS I LOVE YOU MWAH

© 2023 DOOBEA. do not copy any of my writing and translate/repost.

[crimsonalchemistress]

Dynamics I would've loved to see in Naruto, in no particular order

Sasuke and Temari in a low-stakes combat team-up, mostly played for laughs. I just really want to see her use her Giant Fucking Fan to power up Sasuke’s fire attacks to comedic levels of Too Much™. Would they have chemistry? Most likely no. Is the idea still hilarious to me? Hell yes it is. Although I can see both of them enjoying the ensuing chaos/horrified shock in their own ways.

Lee and Omoi team-up. The megaphone of the Power of Youth™ with the sentient anxiety disorder is, again, very fucking funny in my head, especially with how they would annoy everyone around them from completely opposite directions.

Kabuto being jealous and petty towards Sasuke for stealing Orochimaru's attention. Like he knows Orochimaru is just trying to get the Sharingan but also Orochimaru was his master first not Sasuke's but goddamn pretty boy gets everything he wants, doesn't he?

Sasuke and Shino friendship. They had A Vibe going during the Konoha Crush arc and it's a shame we never got to see it again.

Sakura and Kiba meddling while trying to get Hinata and Naruto together. Half the time they'd be at each other's throats and the other half they'd take turns holding each other off from pounding Naruto for doing something stupid.

Ino and Naruto (andHinataMyPoorBabyGirl). Same thing as Sakura and Kiba but for getting Sakura and Sasuke together. Except now Hinata is involved due to her proximity to Naruto and she has to keep both of these Loud Blonde Idiots in line. God help her when Sai decides to get involved.

Sakura, Tenten, and Lee as a genin team(definitely going more into AU territory here but whatever). Not a single ninja nepo baby in sight, all hard work and skill, no genetic or inherited skill.

Sakura and Karin comforting each other after the Five Kage Summit arc. Sakura deserves more girl friends and nothing brings girls together quite like talking shit about men. It just would've been so sweet and maybe even a little gay to see them work through their feelings together.

Kiba and Naruto friendship. I think it speaks for itself. Barely half a brain cell between the two of them. The antics they would get up to. The people they would piss off. The migraine medication Sakura would be dependent on while keeping them from getting into too much trouble. It can be so personal, y'know?

Kakashi and a therapist. 'Nuff said.

The Mizukage's boot and my sternum

[anyon-else]

Will You Remember Me As I Am Now? (The Red Room pt.10) | For the first time in your life, you understand what true happiness feels like, and it's both exciting and terrifying. You know now that you have to hold onto it before it's ripped away. (Marvel AU) – spotify playlist | read on ao3

Pairings | Kakashi Hatake x Black Widow!Reader + Sakura Haruno, Sasuke Uchiha, Naruto Uzumaki, Orochimaru, Kabuto Yakushi

Warnings | female!reader, fluff, hurt/comfort, angst, abuse, violence, guns, manipulation, nightmares

Word count | 9.3k

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Life was pleasant.

You hadn't realized that a feeling like this existed. For as long as you could remember, your existence was contained within a small echo-chamber where you learned only about the world's cruelties. On a good day, you didn't add another scar to your seemingly never-ending collection. On a bad day, someone died at your hands. The bad days were often more frequent than the good ones.

But now, it seemed that the Red Room and all of the pain associated with it was just a distant memory. Even your nightmares had slowly faded away, only reappearing between long periods of restful nights.

The dizzying change wasn't necessarily hard to accept. Especially when you were becoming so attached to what your life had become.

Tonight, you'd been invited to Sakura's first movie night since she'd gotten back.

Kakashi was on your right side, tired eyes straining to focus on the movie. Naruto sat at his feet, leaning back on his legs and nodding off every few minutes. Sakura was pressed against your left side, leaning in your shoulder with a small, content smile. Sasuke was on the floor next to her, leaning just slightly on her legs and watching the screen with interest.

According to Sakura, movie night was a fairly normal activity for the four of them. Before she was taken, they'd had one at least once a week. However, when Kakashi had asked you to join them, he told you that this was their first time continuing the tradition since Sakura was taken. He could never bring himself to suggest it without Sakura being there, and Naruto and Sasuke never brought it up either.

So, while Sakura probably saw this as her reintegration of a continuous and simple tradition, you noticed the way that Kakashi glanced over the three kids fondly. Every now and then, you'd catch him looking at each of them as if taking a head count, just to make sure he had all of them there.

You couldn't remember what the name of the movie they'd chosen was. In all honestly, you were barely paying attention. From the moment Kakashi had sat down at your side, close enough that his arm was pressed against yours, you'd felt your heartbeat spike. Frustratingly, it refused to lower despite your best efforts to focus on the movie instead of the proximity.

This had been happening more and more recently. It frustrated you that you had little control over the way you reacted to his presence, and even more infuriating was that you didn't know why.

And you couldn't ask him. The thought alone made you want to crawl into a hole. But it was also becoming troublesome; it was getting harder and harder to sleep in the same bed as him when your heart was beating out of your chest. Some nights you worried he'd hear it, but he seemed perfectly normal.

So normal that it aggravated you.

Why were you so effected by his presence, yet he seemed perfectly fine? He slept peacefully. He rarely got flustered. He was acting the same as always, and while you were grateful that he wasn't confronting you about any odd behavior, it didn't seem fair that this mysterious nervousness was only effecting you.

However, now wasn't the time to ponder on the reasons. It was all you could do to keep your heart from racing. It was unfamiliar and unpleasant enough that you wished your body would just calm itself down without your intervention.

You were disappointed in yourself. Could you really not control anything about your body, from your actions to your feelings?

Sakura glanced at you when you shifted, trying to adjust and put as much space between you and Kakashi that you could. If it was the physical contact that made you so nervous, you knew that you should've just told him that you didn't want him touching you, but this felt different from the unpleasantness that you generally associated with touch. You were so confused, and it infuriated you.

Sakura was giving you continuous and frustratingly obvious glances whenever Kakashi shifted. You knew that she felt your heart-rate pick up, and this new tangle of emotions was not made any less frustrating by her knowing looks.

At one point during the movie—which you'd discovered through short intervals of attention was about a friendship between a fox and a dog—you noticed Sasuke's subtle nudge against Sakura's leg. It would've been easily mistakable as a shift in position, but the small glance that he shot her was painfully obvious to your well-trained eyes.

For a moment, neither Sasuke nor Sakura moved, and you felt it acceptable to let your guard down and shift your attention back to the movie. However, the moment you lifted your head, Sakura leaned closer to you and pressed herself into your side. She sighed happily as she pushed much more than her full weight on you, and while it wasn't necessarily strange that Sakura clung to you like this, her movements ended up crowding you against Kakashi's side. You were practically hip-to-hip now, though Kakashi didn't look anywhere near as startled as you felt by the change. In fact, he smoothly and nonchalantly pulled his arm from between your hips and laid it over the back of the couch behind your head. Your eyes widened, and your heartbeat picked up again despite his arm being a few inches from your neck. Sakura looked at the new position, and you wanted to shove her off the couch when a smug smile spread across her lips.

Kakashi, much to your chagrin, didn't look the least bit phased. He and Naruto were completely engrossed in the movie, oblivious to the silent war that you'd decided to start against Sakura and Sasuke.

"Psst," Sakura whispered, loud enough to pull Kakashi's attention away from the screen, "you're heart's beating pretty fast. Are you feeling okay?"

You heard the false concern in her voice, and you met her forced frown with a glare, pointedly facing her rather than Kakashi when he raised a brow at you and Sakura.

"I'm fine," you grit, closing your eyes when Kakashi's hand fell to your back to feel your racing heart for himself. He you'd become far more comfortable with his touch over the past few weeks, but now it was beginning to have the opposite effect that you wanted. You thought your heart might burst from your chest if this went on any longer.

"It is beating fast," Kakashi muttered, misguided concern in his voice. He probably thought you were having a panic attack, "you don't have to stay. Do you want to go back to our room?"

Our room. Damn him. Sakura covered her mouth to hide a snicker and Sasuke was grinning like a cheshire cat. Damn them too. Damn it all.

"Yeah," you said hoarsely, clearing your throat and stepping away from his touch, "that'd be good, I think."

You left the room quickly, steps echoing in the vast space of the lounge. The movie continued playing, and you released a heavy sigh when you entered Kakashi's room.

This was a fairly recent phenomenon. Your nervousness hadn't been this bad last week, and the week before you'd been perfectly content in Kakashi's presence. You'd still been able to sleep somewhat soundly, though you'd recently started facing away from him at night. It was hard to tell whether that was a result of growing trust or increased nervousness.

God, you were losing it. You were a spy. A former Black Widow. You were better than childish crushes, though you were really doing your best to convince yourself that there was something else going on. Unfortunately, that was the only explanation that you could come up with.

You couldn't really be blamed for it, though. Not when you got to see his face night after night, mask discarded like he was completely comfortable being so vulnerable around you.

It made you overthink to an infuriating extent.

You sat on the bed, thinking hard enough on this revelation that you'd slowly come to over the past week that you barely heard the door opening behind you. The fleeting hope that it was Sakura coming to check on you vanished when Kakashi's familiar weight sank into the bed.

"Sakura said I should come check on you," he said, and you closed your eyes. She really had it all planned out.

"I'm fine," you told him, careful not to let any emotion into your voice. What that translated as was a cold and closed-off response, which was likely not going to make him feel reassured by your answer.

"It's okay if you're not, you know."

Everything was becoming irritating. Kakashi. His unending patience. His warmth. How secure you felt around him. It was too good—too...safe. It was completely different from anything you'd ever experienced.

"I am," you sighed, deflating at his gentle tone. He nodded, leaning back on his hands and looking up at the ceiling.

A few months ago, the idea of adjusting to a place like this would've made you laugh. It hadn't been safety that you wanted, it had been routine. Order. Even if it was enforced by pain. In fact, that was something you were so used to that you would've welcomed it with open arms.

But even though the person you'd become was a far cry from who you were, you found yourself becoming more and more comfortable with yourself as each day passed. Each time Sakura laughed at your joked, or Sasuke asked to spar with you, or Naruto asked if you wanted to have ramen with him, you wondered what you had done to make them willing to spend time with you.

You wondered what you had done to make Kakashi feel safe in your presence. You wondered and wondered, but even when no answers came, you felt content.

You woke later that night frozen on your side of Kakashi's bed, gripping the sheets and trying to force yourself to breath. Tears rolled silently down your cheeks and dampened the pillow below you, but you were paralyzed, unable to move to wipe them away.

Kakashi hadn't stirred. It gave you the chance to collect your thoughts, though that was easier said than done. It had been a few weeks since your last nightmare, but your reaction to them kept increasing in intensity. You had grown too used to a pleasant night's sleep. Now your nightmares seemed even more daunting than before, and the idea of sleeping without Kakashi was equally as terrifying.

It took a few minutes to get your stiff limbs to begin moving. Eventually, you stood from the bed and shuffled towards the door to Kakashi's small balcony. The air was crisp, and you took in a deep breath once you'd closed the door behind you.

Your gut was churning.

Things had been quiet at the compound since you and Kakashi finished the mission. Your wounds had fully healed, and with less prominent marks than many of your other scars thanks to Kakashi and Sakura's superior medical care.

Everything was fine. Nothing was out of the ordinary, and HYDRA didn't seem to be a threat to you now. Your previous suspicious that Sakura was still in danger despite Kakashi's reassurances were disappearing with each day that passed, as was the fear that you were losing your mind. Adjusting was becoming easier and easier, and it seemed that way for Sasuke and Naruto as well. You were fitting into their little family with more ease than before.

But looking out at the calm, clear night sky, you felt a familiar, unpleasant feeling in your stomach. It was probably the Widow whispering in your ear, convincing you that all of this was too good to be true, but you felt that there was something else. Something that was giving you this gut feeling.

"Maa," Kakashi muttered behind you. You listened to each of his footsteps as he walked to your side; now, with your lingering sense of dread, it was harder to focus on your nervousness. You studied the surrounding area carefully, looking for a threat that had likely never been there in the first place, "aren't you cold?"

Right. It was the middle of winter, and the middle of the night, but you'd neglected to wear a jacket. In all honestly, you'd barely noticed your poor clothing choice, too caught up in your panic to think of anything but the endearing pull of fresh air.

"A bit," you shrugged, "I just wanted to come out for a second. I'll come back in soon."

Kakashi shrugged, but before you could stop him, he had disappeared inside and returned with a jacket. You'd seen him wearing it when he left the compound for missions, and he generally kept it hung over his desk chair. You felt your nervousness returning when he draped it over your shoulders.

His hands brushed against your arms as they pulled away, and you closed your eyes to try and stop yourself from visibly shivering. Every time he did that, you wanted to grab his hand and keep him close, just to stay in his peaceful presence a little bit longer. The foreign urge made you want to scream; a few months ago, you would have scoffed at the idea of feelings like this. They made people weak and soft.

But now you understood the appeal to a frustrating extent. You still heard Orochimaru's voice like a devil on your shoulder whispering in your ear, telling you that this was why so many Widows died before their time. Their feelings—their humanity—were their downfall. And you'd always looked down on them, just like all the others.

How had you become your own worst fear in so little time?

Was this the person you'd hoped to become? Had you ever hoped to become anything?

You stood with him in silence, listening to the wind rustle the trees and scanning between the trunks, triple checking that there was nothing lurking just out of view.

"What's bothering you?"

It was only logical to tell him about this foreboding feelings, but you also didn't want to raise any alarms if you were just getting worked up over a gut feeling. You had no desire to send Kakashi on another goose chase—not now that things had actually calmed down enough for him to relax.

"Nothing."

He accepted your answer with a nod and further silence. It sent a rush of gratitude through you, and you turned to face him before you could think better of it. You ignored the Widow's voice and Orochimaru's reprimands in your head telling you that acting on childish feelings would only create weakened resolve and depleted strength.

But you felt powerful when you were with Kakashi. Orochimaru's teachings had far too many holes for them to have the same grasp on you as they did before. Especially now that you understood more accurately what humanity entailed.

It felt like freedom.

Kakashi met your gaze, elbows still resting on the railing, but he shot up when you lunged at him. He was frozen in place as you wrapped your arms around his waist, keeping him locked in a tight hug. You were unsure of yourself, and you worried when he didn't respond to your gesture that you'd done something wrong—were hugs meant to be this tight? Should you have given him some sort of warning? Sakura had never minded hugs like this, but that was different. Hugging Sakura never made you feel like your heart was going to burst from your chest, or that your stomach was turning itself over again and again.

It took Kakashi a few seconds to recover, and you thought that he'd stopped breathing in that time, but when he regained his senses he was quick to reciprocate. You let out a sigh when he wrapped an arm around your waist and brought the other to the back of your head, pressing it firmly into his chest and letting out a deep, relieved breath. You felt it against your cheek, a comforting warmth in the cold night air.

You weren't sure what possessed you to do this; it was both brave and, from what Kakashi had seen, completely out of character. But it was something you were desperate for. Just one touch that provided comfort—one reassurance that you were allowed to be someone new. That you were allowed to choose who you wanted to become, and feel these new emotions that had always been forbidden before.

I'll teach you how to be human.

Kakashi's words echoed in your mind, and you thought about how much he had already done. About the progress you'd made in so little time. You were proud of yourself. For the first time in your life, you felt that you'd accomplished something for your own sake rather than someone else's.

Kakashi pressed a kiss to the top of your head, hands still pressed against your back to keep you close.

Maybe, just for this moment, it was okay to ignore your worry. Things were so good, and if this forboding feeling would go away you'd be able to relax. Maybe this kind of gesture wouldn't feel so significant. Maybe, after enough time, it would become normal to hug Kakashi. To hug Sakura, and even Sasuke and Naruto. To be part of a family. To have a home.

"Is this okay?" you croaked, swallowing against your dry throat. "Can I do this?"

"Yes," he whispered back.

You'd never been held before. Not like this.

Everything about your life now was so precious. You were becoming more and more desperate to keep it safe.

You also noticed through the contented haze of your thoughts that Kakashi's heart was beating just as fast as your own.

The next morning, you woke up alone.

Muffled voices slipped under the door, and you could make out Kakashi's voice directing the three kids as they cooked breakfast. You could smell something sweet all the way in the closed bedroom, and it lured you from the warmth of Kakashi's blankets. You trudged into the kitchen groggily, following the sounds of Naruto's shout of surprise and Sasuke's angry groan.

The kitchen was a disaster. The flour that Naruto had supposedly just spilled was spread over the counter and the floor, and some of it had somehow ended up on Sasuke and Kakashi. Sakura had sidestepped the mess and spotted you before the others.

"Ah!" she smacked Kakashi's shoulder, eyes wide in surprise, "Good morning! You're up early, huh?"

"I always get up early," you grumbled, narrowing your eyes at the frozen group, "what's going on?"

"Uh..." Naruto looked around, dusting flour off of the counter and running his hands over it frantically until he found a small, cylindrical object, "happy birthday!"

Confetti shot out of the small tube, and you watched it flutter to the ground to reveal a still-grinning Naruto. You blinked at him, completely bewildered. Birthday? Whose birthday was it?

"What's all this?" you asked, approaching the mess on the counter. From the looks of it, they were in the middle of making pancakes. There was a stack of them on a plate and a mixture of ingredients in a bowl in Sasuke's hands for more batter, which was presumably where the flour mishap had happened.

"Duh. I just told you! It's for your birthday!"

"It's...not my birthday."

"Huh?" Naruto turned towards Kakashi, "but you said...Kakashi-sensei! Did you get the day wrong?"

How would Kakashi know your birthday? You didn't even know your birthday. The concept of birthdays was practically nonexistent in the Red Room; you'd never really given a second thought to yours. When you discovered that people celebrated theirs every year, you thought it was a useless, time-wasting tradition.

"I saw it in your file at the bunker," Kakashi explained when he saw your puzzled expression. You looked at him, but you had to quickly avert your eyes from his soft smile, showing itself in his eyes above his mask.

Oh. So he...remembered your birthday? And went to all this trouble just for a day that was fairly insignificant in the grand scheme of things.

Huh.

You felt your heart skip a beat as you stared at the man, eyes wide and mouth agape. You probably looked comical, and the grin on Sakura's face told you that you weren't being very subtle about your conflicted feelings.

"We made you breakfast!" Naruto said happily. He slid the full plate of pancakes across the table at you, then gave you a wide assortment of syrups and fruits. You approached the table carefully, still reeling from the fact that today was your birthday, and that the others had decided to do something for you to celebrate.

"Eat," Sakura smiled, softer than her previous one. She seemed to understand your confusion, even though she hadn't experienced it herself. Being in the Red Room since birth creates a detachment from one's identity that was hard for you to reconcile now that you were out, independent of Orochimaru's will, "we made it for you."

"Thank you," you muttered, chest warming as you looked at the small buffet that they'd created. Naruto kept pulling toppings out of the fridge—first whipped cream, then chocolate syrup, then strawberries.

"Eat! We're making more, so don't worry about leaving any for us."

It was the first time you'd ever tried pancakes, a fact that you informed the four of as you ate your fill. Naruto looked horrified, mouth open wide before he began shouting about how sad it must've been for you. You didn't attempt to remind him that you'd never exactly been worried about the lack of pancakes in your life.

"Try this one!" Sakura grinned as she pushed a large, spotted pancake towards you, "it's chocolate chip and it's amazing."

"Is not," Sasuke grumbled, ducking away from Sakura's attempt to shove him to the side. "What? They're too sweet."

"Mm," you hummed around your first bite, smiling at the two, "'s good."

"Tch. You all have bad taste."

Sakura glared at Sasuke and caught sight of his plate despite his best efforts to hide it.

"Ew, are you putting raisins in yours, weirdo?"

Kakashi reached over Sakura for the spatula that she was waving at Sasuke and flipped the remaining pancakes on the griddle. When he'd finished, he slid it back into her hand and watched her smack Sasuke's with it.

"Don't insult our pancakes when yours looks like they came out of a retirement home."

Naruto giggled, and you smiled to yourself as they bickered. Kakashi continued making the pancakes with each of the kids' chosen toppings, unfazed by the escalating argument that Naruto had become involved in after an insult to his own topping choice.

"Shut up, Naruto! You add an ungodly amount of chocolate to yours, so you have no room to talk!"

"You shut up! Chocolate is the best topping, believe it!"

Kakashi shook his head at their bickering, and you could see his eyes scrunching as he smiled behind his mask. You were glad that Sakura was enthralled with her argument, too distracted to see your cheeks turning red as you watched Kakashi's emotions through his eyes.

You pictured his face under the mask, smile small but still so full of joy. He really was beautiful.

You choked as the thought crossed your mind. Kakashi glanced up when you practically inhaled the bit of pancake you'd been chewing hit your chest to try and dislodge it from your windpipe.

Beautiful? You had never really been interested in those kinds of observations before. Sure, you could acknowledge things that were beautiful versus not, and you knew what features people generally found attractive, but this was an entirely new feeling.

Every day you added to the list of things that were new about your life. It was exhausting.

But it was also exciting. That was another new feeling. You constantly felt excited about this new life you'd been given.

"Don't choke," Kakashi griped after you'd finished coughing.

"Helpful," you grumbled, avoiding his curious gaze and looking instead at where the kids were still arguing. Sakura had Sasuke in a chokehold, grinning at him as she held him up by the throat. The boy looked like he was starting to go blue in the face; he was tapping Sakura's arm in an attempt to alleviate the pressure, but she just tightened her hold. Naruto had gone silent, argument forgotten as he grabbed Sakura's shoulder with a nervous smile.

"Uh, Sakura? I think he's had enough..."

Sakura looked up, and you finally got a clear look at the smile on her face. Rather than the playful, slightly guilty one that you'd expected, it was a familiar smirk that greeted you.

"Kakashi," you barked, but the man had already realized what was going on and taken action. He jumped at Sakura and freed Sasuke from her hold. You heard the boy coughing and taking in gasps of air before you lunged for Sakura, ignoring the part of your mind that was begging for this to be a dream, focusing instead on the problem right in front of you.

Save her, a part of you screamed. It was the part that she had helped you unlock. It was the one that had been growing since you escaped. It was one that you wanted to hold on to.

Stop her, another voice said, old and familiar like a long-forgotten friend. It was the Widow's voice, reaching out to you again after her long silence. Her phantom hands pressed against your back and pushed you towards Sakura—towards the threat—before she could reach Naruto. The boy had taken a defensive position, but he looked considerably more hesitant to engage with his friend than you felt. Before Sakura had a chance to lunge at him, you wrapped your arms around her waist and threw yourself back so that she landed on top of you.

"Sakura!" you shouted at her, wrapping your legs around her waist at the same time that Naruto and Kakashi grabbed each of her arms and pinned them to the ground. You could still hear Sasuke catching his breath a few feet away, and you tried not to focus on how pained his breathing sounded or how hard Sakura must have tried to kill him.

Not Sakura, you reminded yourself, Orochimaru.

"Sakura, you're stronger than he is," you grunted. Sakura growled, the sound almost animalistic, and Kakashi grabbed the back of her head before she could launch it back into your nose. She snarled again, baring her teeth at him and continuing her vicious fight against the three of you, "Sakura, please! If you can hear me, then fight!"

Her struggle continued, and you tightened your hold on her when her movements became more sporadic.

"Orochimaru," Kakashi said over Sakura, voice carrying across the room and leaving an echo in its wake. Sakura had gone silent in an instant, full attention on Kakashi, "interesting. So you can hear us and see us through her eyes?"

Sakura's eyes were blank, as if her body had been left vacant for a split second. Then she was blinking, and though her body had gone still in your arms, her lips split into a smirk.

"Sakura–" you croaked, tears burning in your eyes as the girl craned her neck as best she could to look at you. When she saw your broken expression, her smirk split into a grin and she let out a laugh.

"My Widow," Sakura whispered, studying your scar as if to confirm your identity, "I hope you enjoyed this phase of rebellion, but I've come to collect what you owe me."

"She doesn't owe you anything!"

"Quiet," Sakura hissed, whipping her head towards Naruto and silencing him with a single, scathing glare, "she owes me everything. She owes me her life. And that is what I've come to collect."

You could feel yourself beginning to shut down. These words were so familiar, and it had been far too long since you'd been reminded of your place. It was a shock to be thrown back into the mind of the Widow, but Orochimaru's were enough of a catalyst. Your head was spinning, and you fought to regain control over your senses despite feeling waves of nausea crashing into you.

"I want to kill you more than anything," Orochimaru said, and the words felt like daggers coming from Sakura's mouth.

This feeling of complete and utter helplessness was what you'd been battling against all this time. It was what you thought you'd overcome, but you were the same as before. You hadn't changed at all, and this was proof. One word from Orochimaru, and you were falling back into your bad habits like they were old friends welcoming you home.

It was as comforting as it was painful.

"It's an ironic kind of punishment for both of us that you're what I need to go back."

"You're more delusional than I expected."

Sakura turned towards Kakashi this time, blank expression focused on him. She studied him carefully, looking between his eyes for any hint of emotion other than forced indifference. He didn't blink.

"Hatake," she finally said with another grin.

"It's good to finally meet you, snake," Kakashi said patiently, still holding Sakura's arm despite her lack of struggle, "I hope you know that this is technically trespassing on SHIELD property."

"You stole something from me," Sakura shot back, "and I've come to collect it."

"You haven't come to collect anything," Kakashi shook his head, leaning closer to Sakura and looking into her eyes. Into the eyes that Orochimaru was watching him through, "you're nothing more than a coward. Not even brave enough to confront me face-to-face."

"You?" Sakura cackled. It sounded wrong coming from her, "I have no interest in you, or any confrontation. What I want is very simple. And I'm willing to offer a trade."

"We don't want anything from you–"

"Freedom," Sakura interrupted Naruto sharply, glaring at him intensely. Naruto flinched at the unfamiliar expression on Sakura's face and turned away, "for Sakura. That is what I'm offering. All I'm asking in return is for my Widow back."

That's it?

It seemed like an easy trade-off. Sakura's freedom? You were willing to give anything for that. Giving yourself up was always an option you'd considered, and now you had the opportunity to save her. She could finally live without fear, and without Orochimaru's control looming over her like puppet strings.

Freedom was the only thing you wanted for her. It was never something you expected for yourself, even if you'd momentarily deluded yourself into thinking it was a possibility.

Trying to be human had proven too difficult for you. Orochimaru was calling you, and you would answer with a promise of loyalty. For Sakura, you would give yourself back to him in a heartbeat.

"No."

You froze, limbs seizing at Kakashi's declaration. You stared wide-eyed at the ground, hearing only your quiet breaths as they began to quicken.

Then, like a switch flipping within you, anger crashed into you in waves.

"It'll only be a matter of time until we figure out how you're controlling her," Kakashi was saying, though you could barely hear him through the ringing in your ears and the heaviness of your breathing, "and then you'll have no power over us anymore."

A hypocrite. That's all Kakashi was. For all his talk about not wanting to be Orochimaru and about giving you back control of your own life, he was standing in front of you—not even looking at you—and deciding with no hesitation that you couldn't save Sakura.

No, that new, happier voice said. She could barely be heard over the Widow's ferocious anger, but she clawed her way to the surface and fought desperately to speak, don't do this. That's Orochimaru's voice in your head. That is exactly what he wants you to believe.

The Widow fought against this new voice, but she dug her fingers into your mind and refused to let go.

If you tell yourself that Kakashi is the enemy, you'll alienate yourself from the only people who have ever seen you as an individual. That's exactly what Orochimaru wants. Kakashi is just trying to–

"Wha...what's going on?"

Sakura's voice had changed again. It sounded terrified, and you realized that you were still immobilizing her in a vice-like grip. Despite your previous anger, you glanced at Kakashi almost involuntarily for confirmation that Orochimaru had let go of his hold on her.

"M-my head," she whispered, pressing her palms against her forehead and letting out a panicked, broken sob, "it hurts. Ah–Kakashi-sensei, it...it feels like I'm dying."

"Sakura," Kakashi yelled when the girl began to fall to the side, slumping into Kakashi arms and letting out sporadic, wheezing exhales, "Sakura, does anything else hurt?"

"I'm dying," Sakura choked, curling into herself on Kakashi lap and holding the back of her head against her chest, "it hurts so bad. I think...am I going to die?"

"No, Sakura, you're–"

"I don't wanna die. I can't...I just came back. I just came home. Please, just don't let me die."

"Orochimaru is still controlling her," you muttered, kneeling next to Sakura and placing a hand against her forehead. Her temperature was normal, "he's making her feel like this. He wants us to see it so we'll break."

And it was working.

Kakashi's indifferent mask had broken into something pained and terrified. Naruto was rambling to Sakura, telling her that everything was going to be okay. Sasuke was standing behind Kakashi, throat bruised with her handprint and fists clenched tight at his sides. He stared at Sakura with a pain in his eyes that you had never seen before.

You could stop this. It was such an easy problem to solve that it was almost laughable.

"Stop," you muttered, pulling Sakura's shoulder so that she was facing you. Your throat tightened at the sight of her face, streaked with tears and twisted in pain, "stop this. You can have me, so stop hurting her."

It took a moment, but you saw the shift that took place on Sakura's face. The pain fell away, and then that emptiness was back. You almost preferred the pain to this—she looked like a corpse.

"Think this through," Kakashi said next to you, voice shaky as he stared down at Sakura's limp body, "we can figure something else out."

"There is no other option, Kakashi," you muttered, anger forgotten. You were too tired for anger. You had already made up your mind. "You have your family. They can all be safe again."

Kakashi stared at you, eyebrows pinched together and still just as pained as they were before. You wanted to run a hand over his forehead and smooth out the frustrated wrinkles in his skin. You wanted to tell him that this was okay with you. That this was what you wanted. To protect Sakura. To protect him and Naruto and Sasuke. To give them back their lives.

They had a chance to be a safe. You weren't going to let them give that up.

Sakura began to move slowly. Her movements were robotic enough that Kakashi and Naruto allowed her to stand, though they stayed close to her side and followed her to the kitchen. She picked up a spare napkin from breakfast and swiped away your empty plate with little regard to it shattering on the floor.

"Pen."

It wasn't Orochimaru's voice, but it wasn't Sakura's voice either. It was like an empty void had taken hold of her, expending only the energy necessary to complete its task.

Sasuke placed a blunt marker into her waiting hand, though she didn't seem bothered by the divergence from her instructions. Instead, she scribbled something on the napkin, then handed it to you with empty eyes. She was looking right through you, recognizing you only as the recipient of the note that she'd written. On it was an address.

"This is your house," you muttered, glancing at Kakashi with wide eyes.

"Meet there," Sakura commanded monotonously. Then, with no warning, she crumpled to the ground.

For as long as you had known her, Sakura had been fascinated by mythology.

She would tell you stories when the darkness of a cell became suffocating for both of you. She would whisper the words with so much excitement, wanting to share the stories that you'd never had the opportunity to hear. She'd tell you about Helen and Artemis and the magnificent creatures that lurked in forests and within caves. She transported you into a world wholly different from your own, where you could imagine yourself sailing the Aegean Sea in the open air, part of an equal collective of heroes whose responsibilities matched your own. Where you could swim with mermaids and face Charybdis' crashing waves and the monstrous form of Scylla. Where pain was simply a part of adventure rather than a means of control.

When you were free, she gave you the book of Greek myths that Kakashi had read to her as a child. She said that you always seemed interested in what you had to say, and you kept it by your bedside in Kakashi's room and reread the stories that Sakura had once told you. You told her every time she asked what you thought that you preferred the way she told them.

You remembered reading about the HYDRA. That was one story that Sakura never told when you were both in the Red Room. You had stared at the detailed painting of its long, snaking heads and the sharp points of its teeth and wondered if this was how Orochimaru saw himself. As one of those terrifying creatures, looming over the world like a god and multiplying each time he raised a girl to become a killer.

The Hydra had poisonous blood so virulent that even its scent was deadly. The Hydra possessed many heads and had regenerative power: for every head chopped off, the Hydra would regrow two in its place.

Orochimaru had left Kakashi's door hanging open in invitation. Kakashi's hands were wrapped tight around the steering wheel, though you were doing your best not to look at him. You almost couldn't stand the tension in the car or the silence that had persisted since Sakura passed out. She was sitting in between Naruto and Sasuke in the back seat, slumped on Sasuke's shoulder and supported by Naruto's arms around her waist, holding her steady. She hadn't stirred since she collapsed.

Kabuto was waiting for you in the doorway. You felt a chill race down your spine at the sight of him, and you could already feel yourself beginning to shut down. You could practically feel the intensity of his gaze, and you wondered if the slight ache in your cheek was a phantom pain that originated from your many memories of his fists hitting you again and again, insisting that pain was the only way to make you stronger.

You had become so weak. You hadn't realized it before, but you'd been too relaxed while you were with Kakashi and the others. You'd let your guard down for too long, and now you were paying for it.

Kakashi didn't move when you opened the car door. You glanced back at Naruto and Sasuke with a silent but firm order: do not come out of the car.

Kabuto didn't move when you began approaching him. His face remained expressionless, though you could see the tension in his body. His hands were balled into fists, and when you finally stopped a few feet away from him, his eyes narrowed just slightly.

Kakashi opened his door at the same time that Kabuto took a single step forward and slapped you across the cheek. The strength of it left your face stinging, and you felt your lip beginning to bleed where a ring had caught on the skin. It was far too familiar to be surprising.

"You have no idea how much you've destroyed," Kabuto said, and you only began to understand just how angry he was when you heard his voice. It was low and dangerous; the man was usually more composed than anyone you'd ever met. This level of anger from him was new territory. "If we didn't need you, I'd kill you where you stand."

You kept your lips sealed shut, ignoring Kakashi standing at your back. You saw Kabuto's eyes shift to meet his and waited with shallow breaths for one of them to move. You certainly wouldn't be the first.

"I see you've found another master," Kabuto sneered, glaring at you once again when he'd finished studying the indifferent expression on Kakashi's face. Kabuto grabbed your shirt and jerked you forward, his movements sudden and sporadic. You reached back and caught Kakashi's arm just as he began to move it. This wasn't the time to hinder Kabuto or Orochimaru from doing what they wanted. Not with Sakura's life on the line.

Kakashi's arm was tense in your grip. You tightened your fingers around his wrist just slightly, hoping that your silent reassurance would be conveyed in the gesture.

You knew it would only do so much. Time and time again, Sakura was being ripped away from him. He had to be sick of seeing her in pain.

And one cause of that pain was standing right in front of him.

Kabuto pulled you close enough that his lips were next to your ear. You felt warm breath on your skin and closed your eyes, fighting not to shrink away.

"You're nothing," he hissed. "Don't forget that just because you're needed."

You knew what you were. You had always known—you had just forgotten. For the briefest moment, you'd deluded yourself into thinking that you could mean something. That you could become someone.

A pipe dream. That was all it would ever be.

The creature was so poisonous that it killed men with its breath, and if anyone passed by when it was sleeping, they breathed its tracks and died in the greatest torment. Even the smallest contact with the Hydra’s blood could be fatal.

Orochimaru was waiting for you on Kakashi's couch. He didn't seem bothered by Kakashi's presence at your side; he must've been confident in the threat that he was holding over you both. He knew after Kakashi's many attempts to get Sakura back that he wouldn't risk her. Not for you.

Kabuto had said it himself. You were nothing.

When you saw Orochimaru for the first time after so long, it felt like you'd never left his side. You mind went blank, and you froze where you stood. You barely noticed Kakashi's pack scattered around the room, all motionless but still visibly breathing.

You were at attention, though you made sure that you weren't looking directly at Orochimaru. He didn't tolerate eye contact with his Widows. He claimed that it made them seem too human—too emotional. He wanted complete detachment from any kind of personal connection with you. To the Widows, Orochimaru wanted to be a god—untouchable and all-powerful.

You couldn't move. Your body wasn't responding to any of your brain's commands. You just stood, waiting for your fate like a deer waiting patiently for headlights to meet it. Orochimaru stood from the couch in silence, calm and collected and appearing as if he was in complete control of his emotions.

You tried to embody that same control, but found that panic mounted within you each time he took a step in your direction. By the time he had stopped in front of you, you'd stopped breathing altogether in an effort to hide your fear. To hide how terrified you were at the idea of going back to him. Any residual longing you'd felt for the familiarity of the Red Room disappeared as you stared at the wall next to him, eyes and lungs burning. With Orochimaru so close for the first time in months, you wondered how you had ever wanted to be near someone who's entire being screamed danger.

Orochimaru didn't move for a long moment. When he did, you felt the pressure of his cold fingers gripping your chin. He moved your face until you were forced to meet his gaze.

Terror seized your body when you finally looked into Orochimaru's cold, snake-like eyes. He was looking at you like he could see into the very depths of your soul, and you finally exhaled in a choked, broken whimper. There was the slightest upward twitch of Orochimaru's lips.

"You've made things very difficult for me," he said, the words slithering from his mouth like a snake escaping a cage. You felt them coiling around your throat with the familiar intent to kill. Despite how calm he may have looked, you had been studying him for signs of anger your whole life. His fury was practically dripping from the corners of his mouth as his lips shifted up into a smirk, "but even so, I've decided that you still have a place as a Widow."

Orochimaru's fingers had tightened on your chin, and his smile had widened into something crazed.

"You want that, don't you?"

Speaking seemed like an impossible task, but you forced your lips to part and felt the expected answer forming in your throat.

"Yes," you croaked, though it was hardly convincing. Orochimaru laughed and turned you around to face Kakashi and Kabuto where they stood in the doorway. Orochimaru's fingers fell to the back of your neck, and you recognized the warning in his tight grip.

"Then why don't you tell that to Hatake before he does something he'll regret."

You took a moment to clear the fog from your mind and look at Kakashi. The indifferent mask had fallen from his face, and Orochimaru seemed to see how desperate he was to stop the scene that was unfolding in front of him. Kabuto was keeping him far enough from you that he wouldn't interfere, but his shoulders were rising and falling too quickly to be from anything but panic. He looked ready to lunge towards you the second he found an opening.

His eyes met yours immediately when you turned around, searching for anything other than the desperate terror and resigned acceptance that he saw.

You wished you felt brave enough to speak. To reassure him and stop him from panicking when he didn't need to.

Don't move. Don't let him hurt her. It's okay. This was always going to happen.

"Tell him," Orochimaru ordered, "where it is that you belong."

His hand on the back of your neck felt like a shock to your system, waking you to the reality of what was happening. You were back in Orochimaru's cruel hands, waiting with bated breath for his next move. But through your hazy panic, one thought fought through and left your lips before you could even consider stopping it.

"Not until you fix her."

Kabuto froze at your words. He knew that as well as you did that ignoring Orochimaru's orders almost always ended in death.

"You offered a trade," you croaked. You voice sounded weak, and you almost felt ashamed that Kakashi was seeing you at such a low point, "so hold up your end of the bargain."

"Look at you," Orochimaru said with another laugh, condescension dripping from the words, "I almost want to be proud, but you and I both know that you weren't raised to speak out against me."

You wished you had never left. You wished you had just given Sakura to Kakashi the day that he came for her and gone back inside. You wished that he had left you there.

"You forgot your place, and now you've made it my job to remind you," Orochimaru hissed in your ear. "Now tell him where you belong."

"No," you whispered, the word so faint that you weren't even sure if you'd said it. But the tightening of Orochimaru's fingers around your neck was evidence enough that he'd heard you. Kakashi took a step forward, but froze when Kabuto raised a gun and pointed it at his chest. His wide eyes were still studying you, watching every minute reaction to Orochimaru's torment.

The man that he'd been itching to get his hands on was right here in front of him. He was close enough that he could take one leap forward and close his hands around the man's throat. He could fix this. He could stop you from giving yourself back to him.

"Kakashi-sensei!"

Naruto's voice was high and panicked on the opposite side of the door. He was keeping his distance, and it was clear that he didn't see you or Orochimaru standing in the center of the room, but Orochimaru still held tight to your neck to keep you from moving towards the boy. You closed your eyes and fought against the urge to follow Naruto's distressed cry.

Kakashi's reaction was instantaneous. He had turned around in a heartbeat, ignoring Kabuto's weapon and taking a step out of the house to face Naruto.

"Sakura's seizing!"

Kakashi's body went taut at the same time that all of the fight drained from your body. This was it. This was Orochimaru's trump card; the one thing that he could hold over your head that would make you do anything he asked.

He could kill Sakura. He didn't even have to be in the same room as her to make her heart stop.

"That's enough," you croaked, attempting to face Orochimaru but stopping when he thumb pressed deep into the junction of your neck, "I understand. I belong in the Red Room. I-I belong to you."

You heaved against the panic that still swirled in your stomach. Nausea was crashing in waves inside of you, and you thought you would've collapsed had it not been for Orochimaru holding you up by your throat.

"She stopped!" Sasuke shouted, voice farther from the house than Naruto's. Kakashi visibly relaxed and ordered Naruto to go back to the car and watch over Sakura. Naruto didn't protest.

Kabuto looked satisfied by your compliance, but Orochimaru was still tight. There was a long pause after your words, and you wondered if it was too late to give him the answer he wanted. Maybe you'd already dug your grave deep enough to lay in.

I belong to you.

You tried to change. You tried to escape. You tried to become human.

It just wasn't what fate had in store for you.

"Good."

Orochimaru's grip slackened, and he let you fall past his fingers until your knees hit the floor with a hard thump. You stared down at the wood with wide eyes, wondering how everything had changed so fast. Just this morning you'd discovered that today was your birthday, and Kakashi was making you pancakes with the kids. And not even two hours had passed.

Kakashi knelt in front of you with little concern about Kabuto or Orochimaru. You couldn't bare to look at him—not after he'd seen what Orochimaru could do to you. At how quickly you'd let him erase months of progress.

You felt hesitant, careful fingers brushing against your cheeks, and when you didn't react to the touch, Kakashi pressed his hands on either side of your face and lifted it so that you were forced to meet his eyes. It was a much gentler way of meeting your eyes, and you felt a deep sense of longing for it.

"I'm sorry," you croaked, "I tried."

He shook his head, brushing his thumb under your eye to keep a tear from falling. He was close enough that you knew Kabuto and Orochimaru wouldn't be able to see the movement, but neither were paying attention to the scene. Kabuto was waiting impatiently for Orochimaru to become bored with the emotional display, but Orochimaru was silently standing a few steps from you, barely paying attention to what the scene.

"Don't do this," Kakashi whispered. You wondered if you could trap the sound of his voice in your mind and hold on to it while you rotted away in the depths of the Red Room, "we can protect her."

"I know we can," you said back with a slight smile. You pressed a hand against his and closed your eyes, wondering why you hadn't accepted this kindness from him earlier. Maybe you would've gotten more of it before it was ripped away. Enough that it would take longer to forget the feeling of how warm his hand felt against your skin. But you knew that the feeling would slip away before you were ready to let it go, "just make sure she doesn't blame herself for this."

"I can protect you both," he pleaded. Your breath hitched, though it sounded more like a broken sob. Kakashi's face fell even further.

No one had ever protected you. No one had ever been given the chance. And no matter how much you wished it, Kakashi wouldn't be able to either.

"Take care of them."

Some ancient writers tried to come up with a rational explanation for the myth of the Hydra. Heraclitus, for example, suggested that the Hydra really had only one head, but was accompanied by its numerous brood—that is, the Hydra was really many snakes rather than a single many-headed snake.

"One of your doctors is a Widow," Orochimaru told Kakashi from the doorway, "her name is Shizune. She's the reason that Sakura's examinations weren't conclusive. You'll be able to get answers from her after six months have passed. In those six months, I won't have any use for Sakura, so unless you come looking for me or my Widows, she won't be in danger."

"Absolutely not. That's not what we agreed–"

"You have no bargaining power," Orochimaru snapped, looking down on Kakashi like the man was an ant that he wanted to crush. You shrunk away from him and back towards Orochimaru to avoid any further retaliation against either of you. Kakashi's hands fell from your face as you leaned away, and you tried not to feel like you were ripping yourself away from the only chance you'd ever had at happiness.

"Forget the Red Room and any connection you and Sakura have to it, and you won't ever have to see it again."

You were hesitant to look at Kakashi again, but the fury on his face when you did left you paralyzed.

Was that anger for Sakura?

Was it for you?

"Understand one thing," Kakashi said lowly, eyes alight with an unfamiliar rage, "I'll never forget this. And one way or another, I'll see you again."

"If that days comes," Orochimaru said with a dark smile, lips split like an open wound, "it'll be your last moments alive."

A sharp sting in your neck finally made you look away from Kakashi. His eyes widened when your body went slack and you fell to the side. He reached forward and caught your head before it could hit the floor, but his hand quickly disappeared when you were lifted into less gentle arms. You recognized the grip as Kabuto's, and despite your best efforts to stay conscious enough to be aware of your surroundings, darkness quickly swallowed your vision.

The Hydra's one immortal head was cut off with a golden sword given to Heracles by Athena. Heracles placed the head—still alive and writhing—under a great rock on the sacred way between Lerna and Elaius, and dipped his arrows in the Hydra's poisonous blood.

The last thing you saw was Kakashi, out of focus and still kneeling on the ground with his hands resting on the floor in front of him. Darkness prevailed, and freedom slipped through your fingers.

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Author's note | i'm sorry this chapter took me so long. i rewrote the end after i had it basically finished because i didn't love how it turned out, but i think i'm happy with how it ended up. it also ended up being very long oops. please let me know what you think!

also if you're interested please check out the spotify playlist linked with the summary. i'm lowkey obsessed with it.

title is from "Timefighter" by Lucy Dacus

[bougiebutchbitch]

Okay so I re-read manga in War arc and am I overthinking this or do we underestimate how much Obito and Gai straight up don't like each other? Like, Gai side-eyeing Kakashi when he approach Obito, Obito thumb-downed Gai and Gai beat the shit outta him while forgetting his face, Obito called Gai Beast Face and yelled at him to not come at him and Kakashi, Gai seemed to don't, really, care for Obito's downfall, focusing on its effect to Kakashi and cheering Naruto when he mocked Obito, GAI DIDN'T EXIST ON A PANEL OF OBITO'S TSUKUYOMI IMAGINATION

My point is I like to imagine in Everybody Lives AU Obito and Gai is the two sunshine duo whom everyone assume to have bright supportive camaredies like Naruto and Lee, but actually their personalities kinda clash and they just somehow dislike each other

They fight each other for Kakashi and they fight together for Madara

sfiphgksdfhgklsdfgsdfgsdfgkhlsjdflghsdg I AM OBSESSED WITH THIS

GAI LITERALLY DOES NOT EXIST IN OBITO'S PERFECT WORLd I'm sCREAMINGGGGG

This is so fucking hilarious... for bonus points, I imagine in the Everybody Lives AU, their Extreme Dislike of each other starts off as vaguely Kakashi-centric. Gai hates Obito for abandoning Kk and contributing to his big ol' breakdown and then almost killing him and everyone else (AND NEJI LET'S NOT FORGET). Obito hates Gai for being So Fucking Perfect and having a good life and him being Kakashi's bestie (and more ohohoho) after Obito's 'death'.

Kakashi is mildly worried / amused by this but mostly just BUSYBUSYBUSY hokage-ing, and does not have time to chaperone his two beefybois.

However. It does not STAY Kakashi-focused. It very quickly moves into them both genuinely grating on each other and winding each other up by breathing in each other's proximity and challenging each other to stupid contests to prove themselves and -

HEY NOW KAKASHI'S FEELING LEFT OUT -

[theredconversegirl]

Hello Are there any trapped sasusaku aus like stuck in an island or something?

Hello nonny,

Thanks for stopping by! 💕

I enjoy all kinds of forced proximity scenarios in fics, they bring a little thrill and the tension... 👌 My favorites, in this case, are snowstorms and desert islands.

I checked my faves and TBR lists, and here's what I have to share:

Trapped Fics 🍅🌸

*In which they are stuck or trapped somewhere alone.

Theory of Time By: Pensulliwen

In the confrontation between Team 7 and Hebi, Sakura's determination to retrieve Sasuke leads to the two being trapped in a cave, both nearly out of chakra, with nothing to pass the time until their rescue/suffocation but conversation. [Rated T, complete]

🍅🌸🍅🌸🍅🌸

Two night stand By: Hiatus indefinite

"One night stand is usually not my thing.." She spoke slowly as her eyes met his and he studied her flushed face for a while before a handsome smirk appeared on his face. "Then don't stand. Just lie down..." Two strangers stuck together in a blizzard bond in a most unusual way. [Rated M, complete]

🍅🌸🍅🌸🍅🌸

200 Days of Summer By: cutecrazyice

It was so ironic how the one person she never wanted to see again more than anyone in the world would end up being the only person she was stuck with for…oh, let's say 365 days. [Rated M, complete]

🍅🌸🍅🌸🍅🌸

Stuck By: misericordia98 | ao3 link

He wasn't sure if his day could get any worse than this, but apparently, it could. Elevator SS/Modern AU. [Rated T, complete]

🍅🌸🍅🌸🍅🌸

Us And These Walls By: pain_somnia

Sasuke Uchiha just made it so difficult to get to know him as anything other than Obito’s ridiculously hot cousin. And then the quarantine order was issued. [Rated M, complete]

🍅🌸🍅🌸🍅🌸

Seven Minutes By: sokku

What are they to do when they get locked in a closet? Sasuke seems to understand the answer to that solution. [Rated E, complete]

🍅🌸🍅🌸🍅🌸

Snowstorm By: RoseHenderson

The last she knew, Sasuke had tried to kill her. Now, for some reason Sakura didn't fully understand, she was trapped with him in a cave in the middle of a snowstorm. [Rated M, complete]

🍅🌸🍅🌸🍅🌸

Pink Dust By: ValkyrieFaery

Team Kakashi was dispatched to investigate a mysterious disturbance of chakra. How Sakura had managed to get into this mess, she did not know. Through a series of unfortunate events, the Kunoichi had somehow gotten herself stuck. In a cave. With none other than the infamous Uchiha Sasuke. With no way out... [Rated E, incomplete]

🍅🌸🍅🌸🍅🌸

Through the Mountains By: CatFlorist

A rockslide traps Sasuke and Sakura in a maze of tunnels that runs through a mountain range. Legends say the tunnels were built by two lovers to meet in secret, that love finds its way in the dark. When their torch runs out, Sakura has an idea on how to make it out. [Rated K, complete]

🍅🌸🍅🌸🍅🌸

Growing Felines By: xKaileo / @xkaileo

Sakura is a manager at an animal shelter. Sasuke is a volunteer who visits often when he feels the need for companionship. When Sakura's stuck at the shelter in a blizzard and Shisui can't make it in to help her look after the animals, he asks Sasuke to check on her... knowing full well his younger cousin has been crushing on the pink-haired shelter manager for weeks now. [Rated T, complete]

🍅🌸🍅🌸🍅🌸

7 minutes in heaven By: Saku015

The (dis)advantages of college parties. [Rated M, complete]

🍅🌸🍅🌸🍅🌸

Weathering the Storm By: wolf08

Mid-mission, Sasuke and Sakura are trapped in a torrential downpour. But they choose the wrong spot to hide and instead Sasuke finds himself facing a storm within. [Rated K, complete]

🍅🌸🍅🌸🍅🌸

LockDown By: NeyugnNosila

Sasuke and Sakura get stuck in Konoha's Academy School that's on LockDown! What will happen while the two are in there? [Rated T, complete]

——————————————————————————

If I missed anything or anyone has more recs, please let me know. 🙏 I hope you enjoy these stories! 😁

Stay Safe,

xoxo

[sukuna-lover]

- Before You Follow -

~ Please Read before requesting ~

- DNI Information -

• If you are a minor DNI with my NSFW posts. You can however interact with my SFW posts. But at the end of the day I ain’t your parents/guardians so I can’t force you not to interact with my NSFW. But I prefer if you kindly respect my boundaries and DNI with my NSFW contents :)

• If you are an ageless blog I will not block you since I don’t know you age BUT this is your warning that I post NSFW content on here! So do not report me since this is your warning!

• If you are here to spread hate you will just be blocked, no question asked

• If you are gonna be homophobic/transphobic, racist, etc, I will also just block you since this is a safe place.

- Request Information -

• Character/Reader:

- Add as much or as little details as you want!

- If you don’t let me know what gender reader you want it’ll will automatically be GN!Reader

- If you are an POC please let me know and I’ll make the reader that POC :)

- Will Do F!Reader, M!Reader, GN!Reader, POC!Reader, FTM!Reader, MTF!Reader and Plus Size!Reader

• Character/Character:

- Add as much or as little detail as you want!

- If it’s NSFW let me know which character you want as bottom/top or I’ll choose :)

- I will do Trans!Character

- I will do both platonic and romantic relationships

*Note: if you chose Dabi (Toya) let me know if it’s Dabi or Toya! If it’s Toya let me know if it’s an AU where he didn’t become a villain or whatever :)*

- Anime’s I write for -

Bungo Stray Dogs: Any characters (besides Kenji, Kyouka and Teruko)

Black Butler: Sebastian, Snake, Claude, Undertaker, Joker, Grell, William, Agni, Mey-Rin and Ronald

Haikyū: Any Characters

JoJo’s Bizarre Adventure: Any Characters

Jujutsu Kaisen: Megumi, Gojo, Itadori, Toge, Maki, Getou, Nanami, Mahito, Mai, Sukuna and Toji

My Hero Academia: Preferably Shigaraki, Dabi (Toya), Twice, Toga, Aizawa, Hawk, All Might (True form), Chisaki, Shinso and Amajiki. But I’ll do any :)

Naruto: Itachi, Pain, Kakashi, Shikamaru, Madara, Gaara, Naruto, Sasuke, Minato, Neji, Kiba, Sasori, Temari, Deidara, Zetsu, Tobi, Izumo and Kotetsu

Attack On Titan: Erin, Jean, Levi, Hange, Sasha, Mikasa (Maybe), Erwin, Armin and Connie

Angel Of Death: Isaac

Diabolik Lovers: Shu, Reiji, Kou, Laito, Yuma, Subaru, Ruki, and Ayato

Chainsaw Man: Denji, Makima, Aki, Power and Angel

Demon Slayer: Giyu, Rengoku, Akaza, Muzan, Ubuyashiki, Sanemi, Iguro and Tengen

HunterXHunter: Chrollo, Hisoka, Illumi, Feitan, Kite, Ging, Meruem, Neferpitou and Shaiapouf

- What I’ll Write -

• SFW

• NSFW

• Textfic

• Oneshot

• Dribble

• Head Cannon

• SFW/NSFW Alphabets

• AU’s

• Incorrect quotes

- Do And Don’t -

Do:

- Angst: Major character death, breakups, happy ending, arguments, cheating and unrequited love

- Fluff: Getting together, proposal, first kiss, confession, first holiday together, anniversary, birthday, comfort, etc.

- TextFic: Angst, Crack, Fluff

- Head Cannons: SFW, NSFW, dating, How (character) would (Blank), etc

- AU: Soulmates and University

- Mental/Physical Health: Any

- Tropes: Enemies/Lovers, Friends/Lovers, Rivals/Lovers, Grumpy/Sunshine, Fake relationships, Fake relationships/Real feelings, Forced Proximity, Love Triangle, Forbidden Love, and Everyone can see it

- Other: Stalking, Stockholm syndrome and kidnapping

•NSFW:

Bondages, Blindfolds, Dominance, Asphyxiation, Face fucking, Humiliation, Impact Play, Mirror Sex, Masturbation, Voyeurism, Breeding Kink, Exhibitionism, Praise Kink, Edge Play, Orgasm Control, Somnophilia (Constantly), Over Simulation, Dumbification, Dom/Sub, Spit Kink, CockWarming, Branding, Sex Toys, Dacryphilia, Size Kink, Oral Fixation, Threesomes, Temperature Play, Knife Play, Daddy kink, cum eating, degradation, mind corruption and cockolding

Don’t:

This is mostly for the NSFW but I will not do any type of body fluids (besides spitting), nothing that isn’t consensual but that also includes CNC rape, any type of date drugs, age play, foot fetishes, fisting (It’s not my cup of tea), necrophilia, incest of ANY kind including step siblings. I will also not do any minor/adult stuff ESPECIALLY NSFW and romantic! I’m sorry but I will not do Mommy kink either! Also I won’t do AOB (Alpha, Omega, beta) and Mpreg.

Maybe:

• I understand that many people have different type of coping mechanisms and like to read things that helps with it! So these are some of the things that I MIGHT write!

- Abuse: Mental, emotional and physical. If you request any type of abuse just know that it will NOT end with you staying in the relationship!

- Suicide: If you request for the reader or a character to die for Angst reasons I MIGHT write it. But if you want it to be where the reader or character is suicidal and someone comfort them please write it so I know!

- Ships I’ll Write -

Bungo Stray Dogs:

Dazai/Chuuya

Dazai/Doppo

Rampo/Poe

Atsushi/Akutagawa

Tetcho/Jono

Black Butler:

Sebastian/Grell

Sebastian/Claude

Snake/Joker

William/Grell

William/Ronald

Haikyū:

Kuroo/Kenma

Hinata/Kageyama

Oikawa/Iwaizumi

Nishinoya/Asahi

Tsukishima/Yamaguchi

Daichi/Sugawara

Akaashi/Bokuto

Wakatoshi/Tendō

Tanaka/Kiyoko

Hinata/Yachi

Ukai/Takeda

Yaku/Lev

Kiyoko/Yuchi

JoJo’s Bizarre Adventure:

Jotaro/Kakyoin

Dio/Jonathan

Abbacchio/Bucciarati

Narancia/Fugo

Weather/Anasui

Jujutsu Kaisen:

Megumi/Itadori

Gojo/Getou

Gojo/Nanami

My Hero Academia:

Shigaraki/Dabi

Aizawa/Present Mic

Hawk/Dabi

Kirishima/Bakugo

Momo/Todoroki

Deku/Todoroki

Deku/Bakugo

Denki/Jirou

Aizawa/Midnight

Denki/Shinso

Naruto:

Naruto/Sasuke

Izumo/Kotetsu

Attack On Titan:

Levi/Erwin

Levi/Hange

Sasha/Connie

Jean/Erin

Chainsaw Man:

Denji/Aki

Denji/Power

Aki/Angel

HunterXHunter:

Hisoka/Illumi

*Note: This does NOT mean I will not write for any other ship you might have! This is just ships that I like or is really popular :)*

- The End -

Thank you so much for reading until the end! If I didn’t mention anything that you might have questions about please don’t hesitate to send an Ask and I’ll answer it as soon as I can!

Also please be aware that if you send an ask/request all the characters will be age up to be 18+ since I will NOT write NSFW Content for minors!

[prince-everhard]

Weekly Oneshot Challenge - week 10

Title: the pursuit of knowledge Rating: T (mild swearing) Fandom: Naruto Word count: 1647 Summary: Kakashi expects his team to shake the world someday. He doesn’t expect them to shake his world doing homework of all things. [strike team au]

-

“Sensei?” Kakashi looks up from his book at Sakura’s tone. 

All of team seven is studying, even Kakashi. After the grueling month of “conditioning boot camp” that Kakashi shamelessly stole from his ANBU days, the team had fallen into a more sedate routine. Sedate in this case is relative, as Kakashi has also just as shamelessly scoped out how his fellow jounin sensei are treating their students. He won’t say that he finds his peers’ work to be lacking. He’ll certainly think it, but he won’t say it. 

The other genin teams of this graduating class meet three times a week, train for a couple hours, and take on a D-rank or two a week. They rarely see each other outside of training or family functions. Team seven trains almost daily, with a mandated rest day in the middle of the week. From the time they wake up until the time they get ready for bed, they are in some way training or working. Kakashi has made a point to have his team study in the evenings after pushing their bodies during the day. D-ranks are just another kind of training with added parameters and his students’ naturally competitive natures. 

His team also has the benefit of seeing each other almost all day every day thanks to Kakashi’s digging. Jounin sensei aren’t required or even expected to house their students like with an apprenticeship, but there was enough of a precedent for him to offer his family home to his students despite the council’s pushback. Opening his family home to them only made it easier to foster their teamwork and oversee their progress. Naruto was happy to have someone to come home to, Sasuke quietly grateful to have an excuse to avoid the ghosts of his clan, and Sakura was eager to escape the smothering presence of parents who didn’t understand her shinobi lifestyle. So team seven eats, sleeps, trains, and even relaxes together. Between the proximity and the shared misery of their initial training Kakashi can see how his genin has grown both as a team and as individuals.

Their studying in the evenings is varied and intense. There are days where he lets them loose on his father’s old library with no direction; whatever catches their fancy or they want to pursue is fair game. Kakashi finds those evenings entertaining, in a way. He finds himself surprised by what his genin choose to study. Seeing Sasuke thumbing through medical texts surprised him. Naruto’s gravitation toward traps and fuinjutsu is on-brand enough to settle his nerves, though in a few years he knows others are going to have a problem with it. Sakura seemingly picks something at random and when Kakashi comments on this after the third or fourth time she’s changed subjects she tells him firmly that no knowledge that can help the team is bad knowledge and he lets her be after that.

This night isn’t one of their free study nights. Kakashi has them focus on history, his family library supplemented with choice books from the jounin section of the Konoha library. With the Hokage’s purpose of this team weighing heavily on his mind, he has them studying the founding of Konoha. Naruto has a text on the clans of Konoha laying in his lap, though his focus is on notes from the Uchiha clan that Sasuke had offered when they found out the evening’s study topic. If Naruto seriously wants to be Hokage, he’ll have to know the people he’ll be leading. Sasuke is reading about the founding of ANBU and standard training procedures first created by the Nidaime. While Sasuke doesn’t have any goals beyond fratricide, Kakashi thinks that molding the next generations of the village’s elite protectors might suit him. And Sakura-

Well, Sakura has a veritable mountain of books around her armchair, but the one in her grip isn’t one that Kakashi remembers giving her. Kakashi can see general history books on the founding, the major and minor ninja wars, immigration into Konoha, and even a small tome about the battle at the Valley of the End. He’s mildly alarmed at the origin of the book in her hands. Kakashi just barely remembers seeing the same book in Kushina’s hands, once. It’s the journal of Mito Uzumaki. 

“Sensei,” Sakura repeats, and something about her voice has her teammates looking up as well, “Were we put on this team together because Naruto is the kyuubi jinchuriki?”

Sasuke’s brow furrows immediately in thought. By contrast, Naruto’s eyes go wide and his usually tan face goes concerningly pale. Kakashi pings his chakra to check that the security seals on the house are intact and active. He sets his own book down (a tome on wartime psychology gifted to him by the current Yamanaka head) and turns his full focus to his brightest student. Something like that damning feeling of being handed their files in the Hokage’s office fills him. “What makes you think that, Sakura?”

Once, Sakura might have quailed under the full force of his scrutiny. But he’s proud to see that she glances at her team for moral support and straightens her posture even though he’s not muting his chakra. “It’s a lot of little pieces that I’ve been putting together,” she begins. “At first, I thought that being put on the same team as someone with the sharingan was a political statement. Something like, look at our two oldest kekkei genkai working together. And without other details, that makes sense.” It really does, if you’re looking at it from a political angle instead of a military one. “But that leaves a few loose ends. If they wanted to make a political statement, we would have been under a sensei from a clan, probably the Sarutobi.” Sakura seems to come into herself as she speaks; her confidence only grows as she goes further into her reasoning. “And while the Hatake family have fielded several noteworthy shinobi, they’re not politically powerful in the current village climate.” Kakashi shouldn’t be surprised that Sakura has researched his family. No knowledge is bad knowledge, after all. 

“But then that leaves the third teammate. Choosing someone with no clan and no kekkei genkai would have been the best move if this team was politically motivated.” At this, Sakura looks over at Naruto and something in her gaze settles his fear, even if just a bit. “Naruto is an Uzumkai. Even in the orphanage, they kept his last name. It didn’t take much digging to find out there was an Uzumaki clan.” Kakashi can see Naruto mouth the word clan to himself and curses the Hokage and his edict under his breath. Sakura pauses for a sip of water. “The Uzumaki clan has historical ties to Konoha, sure, which could have explained Naruto being in this team if there was still a clan to make that point. But the Uzumaki clan was decimated and scattered when Uzushio was destroyed.” 

All the air seems to leave Naruto in a gust. Sakura looks unsure, hesitating on the edge of her chair, but Sasuke reaches over and taps Naruto’s shoulder with his fist. Naruto waves Sakura on, looking at the floor. “The Shodaime’s wife was an Uzumaki. Uzumaki Mito. The details are a little fuzzy, but it does seem to line up- Madara Uchiha defected from the village and attacked it, but it’s not widely known that he did this using his sharingan to control the kyuubi.” Sasuke doesn’t seem surprised by that announcement. How much of his clan’s history had been taught to him before they were wiped out? “It’s more widely known that the Shodaime used the mokuton to subdue the tailed beast, but it’s not publicly known what happened from there.” Uzumaki Mito was a fuinjutsu master, as were most of the Uzumaki. While the Shodaime was holding the kyuubi, she used her fuinjutsu skill to seal the tailed beast inside herself. She became the first jinchuriki of the kyuubi.” The journal was a big piece of the puzzle, but Kakashi is still impressed with how well Sakura had gathered the information and slotted it together.

Sakura points at herself. “Mokuton.” She points at Sasuke. “Sharingan.” She doesn’t point at Naruto, but instead looks at him with something sad and gentle in her expression. “And an Uzumaki with startling amounts of chakra, an insane healing factor, born on the night of the last kyuubi attack.” At that Naruto does look up. His eyes meet Sakura’s and something happens there that Kakashi can’t quite name. The end result is a ghost of a smile on Naruto’s face and Sakura turning to look at her sensei with defiance in the set of her jaw. “Were we created as a tailed beast containment squad?”

Sasuke has moved his hand to grip Naruto’s shoulder, his gaze also heavy and insubordinate. Naruto is looking between his two teammates with wonder and hope. Kakashi decides, in this moment, that he won’t lie to his students. They deserve the truth. “Yes.”

“Fuck that!” The expletive comes unexpectedly from Sakura. It startles a laugh out of Naruto and even Sasuke nearly smiles. “We’ll be the best squad Konoha has ever seen, and we’ll do it on our own terms.”

Kakashi watches fondly as Naruto’s grin goes as wide and carefree as usual. “The best ever, believe it!” He puts his fist out into the space between them, which Sakura immediately leans forward and presses her fist into his.

“On our own terms,” Sasuke agrees, and he also reaches out and presses his fist into theirs.

All three of his students look at him expectantly. Kakashi’s heart swells and his eyes prickle with emotion. Maybe before he vowed to make them strong out of fear, but now there is only affection as he reaches out his fist as well. You’ll shake the world, he vows.

[itischeese]

bls consider

Obito: ugh having crushes is the *worst*, whenever i have a crush on someone I ALWAYS act stupid around them!!! Kakashi: I don't see how that's any different from normal for you, you're *always* acting stupid even if i'm the only one there to see it. Obito: Rin: Minato: Kushina: Kakashi: why are you all looking at me like that

YOIFEEWYHIEFW YES.

[crescentmoonrider]

I posted 2,865 times in 2022

That's 147 more posts than 2021!

105 posts created (4%)

2,760 posts reblogged (96%)

Blogs I reblogged the most:

@pikarasaaa

@duesternis

@dabiden

@proximally

I tagged 2,029 of my posts in 2022

Only 29% of my posts had no tags

#jujutsu kaisen - 209 posts

#pokemon - 144 posts

#video - 121 posts

#long post - 80 posts

#homestuck - 59 posts

#mob psycho 100 - 58 posts

#gif - 57 posts

#dracula - 51 posts

#clothes - 51 posts

#history - 41 posts

Longest Tag: 139 characters

#(slams the table) give me back my hours of pmd i didnt mean to load that save file i didnt even mean to have a save state my finger slipped

My Top Posts in 2022:

#5

it’s been..... 3 years......... oops ?

for the luckily unaware, i first posted about this AU back in 2019 for the kakaobi week, said “someone remind me to make a post with like, more details about this AU” and then promptly forgot about it

anyway uh, Root AU !

basically, Obito is found by Root, Orochimaru is brought in to experiment on his body with some HashiraDNA™ (it’s not like Obito would survive otherwise, so no consequences if things turn out badly Again) and surprisingly the graft takes

so now Danzo has a new tool, Orochimaru has a long-term pet project and some reassurance that his HashiraDNA™ experiments could work, and Obito is Going Through It

his new body is super fucked up. not only is he now a weird amalgamation of cells that only fit together thanks to seals engraved inside his skin (? or whatever the equivalent of skin is for half-tree-half-man limbs), but the rest of his body is Also covered in seals to guarantee obedience, silence, not bringing harm to Root or Danzo, not revealing his original identity, not killing himself... but also some of them are responsible for keeping him alive, so it’s a mixed bag

his new name is Kinoko, in katakana. because i thought it was funny to call him mushroom and/or tree child, even though it doesn’t fit the pattern of Root names. also it’s just fucked up enough that Orochimaru would like it i think, so we’ll just say he’s the one who chose that name

so that’s the origins of Kinoko

because his old self has been buried by Root training, seals, and trauma, his feelings relative to Kakashi and Rin are pretty different from canon, in that while he witnessed Rin’s death through the shared sharingan connection with Kakashi (which led to the discovery of said connection and the implementation of some news seals inside Obito/Kinoko’s eye socket to make sure nothing from his side goes to Kakashi) and it awakened his mangekyou, he doesn’t keep a grudge. Rin’s death becomes just one more fucked up Root thing in his mind

unlike Kinoe, whose mastery of mokuton is used to great avail with complex buildings and structures, Kinoko’s version of it is incomplete and entirely tied to his body. on the one hand, this limits his range a lot, but on the other he doesn’t require hand signs and thus can launch very efficient surprise attacks

by the time Team 7 is established, Kinoko is assigned to watch over them and make sure nothing goes wrong with either the 9 Tails or the last living Uchiha who isn’t an abomination of nature

while he cannot reveal his identity, nothing in his programming forbids him from being accidentally spotted by Kakashi, which accidentally happens. accidentally

yeah Kinoko is kinda tired of Danzo’s shit, turns out, and would very much like some freedom

51 notes - Posted July 23, 2022

#4

This is true love.

just had to draw the queerest straight couples in jjk on a double date

Hakari and Kirara have such t4t swag... and of course there’s wifeguy and monsterfucker supreme Yuuta and whatever he’s got going on with Rika

in both cases : relationship goals, albeit in a very different way /o\

51 notes - Posted October 5, 2022

#3

my good buddy @b4kuch1n has been doing dress-designing streams these days, and made me want to flex my fashion muscles myself a bit

also, yknow

yuuta in a cute dress good

67 notes - Posted March 21, 2022

#2

See the full post

127 notes - Posted August 31, 2022

My #1 post of 2022

ino is just so shaped, i love him

228 notes - Posted March 29, 2022

Get your Tumblr 2022 Year in Review →

[panharmonium]

au spinoff of my sister @padmerrie’s modern-day bookends au (au-ception!) where kakashi takes responsibility for sasuke after his family dies except in the early days kakashi is still rooming with obito because they’re 21 and broke and still in school (and haven’t had their semi-falling-out yet).  obito feeds sasuke nothing but pizza and soda and couldn’t get him to school on time if you paid him but he does always have the biggest, happiest smile for the smallest, saddest kid.

[sasutiddy]

Ok more hokage's househusband Sasuke because i have brainrot and this AU has become a lot more than expected

Sasuke and Naruto elope right after the war, half because they just realized that they are crazy in love and half because Naruto really doesn't want Sasuke to go to jail, and mayhaps being the husband of a war hero will cut him some slack

So Yeah, they are the first of their generation getting married but they do so with only a few people present (team taka, team 7, and Iruka) right after Sakura estabilizes them, so IMAGINE everyones surprise when they come back attached by the hip and being lovey dovey

Tsunade sees that shit and goes binge drinking immediately because if she, at any moment, was doubting passing the hat to Kakashi, now she was sure SURE

They go back to Konoha alright, but the second Sasuke steps inside village territory he is forbidden from getting out until he "proves himself" to the elders, he hears that shit and immediately decides that he is going to be a bitch about this

After some fighting he gets the Uchiha compound land back with Kakashi's help and starts renovating babyy, and out of pettiness he doesn't let anyone else live in there outside of him and Naruto, the whole thing is mostly a fully planned giant forest/garden around a big house, also he puts a big ass wall around the whole thing, the elders are, of course, furious

After some months in, Sasuke kinda settles in his new Konoha life, since he already kinda decided that he'll just wait to get permission to go out of the village from Naruto when he ends up being Hokage, he decides that in the meantime he might as well learn a thing or two about caring for their house and pets and things like that (also, how to take care of the growing collection of house plants that Naruto is buying)

And with that, Sasuke starts....taking care of the house when Naruto is away, a thing that happens a bit more often when Naruto starts his Hokage training; (it's kinda earlier than expected, but Kakashi really knows that with Naruto, he'll have to pass down so much because that boy has so many gaps in knowledge) so, Sasuke learns how to cook well, specially the recipes from his mom's cookbook, learns how hard it is to clean a house, (he regrets building it so big in his lazier days) and overall learns how nice and fulfilled he actually feels while caring for his new home with the man he loves

Naruto and Sasuke quickly become pet fanatics; Sasuke starts the whole thing with falcons, but then after that he just gets a bird obssession, at one point he buys chickens, he raises chickens and he's very happy with that, Naruto, on the other hand, gets kinda crazy when he realizes he can have frogs, and fish and things like that!!! The pounds around the forest are full of frogs and pretty koi fish

Once Naruto becomes Hokage Sasuke gets his "can get out of Konoha" free card, but he mostly doesn't use it: like yeah, he goes out to see team Taka for a bit and see if he can bring them back with him (they didn't go after the war because they were kinda afraid of being locked up) and when he does finally convince them they kinda take a few weeks to just hang out and chill together, after that he takes some vacations and sometimes accompanies Naruto when he goes to other villages, but he does not go on missions and a fuckton of people are very mad at him for it

When they get kids (and they get kids of course) Sasuke is, of course, the stay at home parent, and he is an INVOLVED one at that, he is there and present at EVERYTHING, and even if both him and Naruto discovered that Naruto can be a bit of a workaholic, he gets his husband in line to be just as present in their kids lifes (he sometimes has to remind himself with how little affection Naruto can run with, and how he seems to think it's the same for everybody else, it takes a while, but they kinda fix it little by little)

Once the kids are at the academy Sasuke and Shino start a very...weird friendship, they always look like they are plotting murder when they are just talking abt which bugs would work the best in pollinating Sasuke's new flower garden or whatever

The few times a year Sasuke and Shikamaru have to see eachother are everyone's else's hell, the entire village always seems to forget how much those two like to inconvenience and bother eachother when they are in proximity, Naruto and Temari say it's because of how long they spend apart: Suna and Konoha are far away and being ambassador and literal desert princess is enough for Shikamaru and Temari to not come to visit that often, and time makes people forget how bad Sasuke and Shikamaru can get

Chunnin exams with Sasuke screaming at the top of his lungs for his kid to obliterate everyone, Naruto almost does the same but is stopped by Sakura every time before he starts a war or something

Sasuke drives people in the Hokage tower CRAZY at least twice a week, he brings Naruto lunch and they always end up making out in the office or smt like that, more than one person has entered the place just to find them in compromising situations, Sakura constantly reminds them that the place is full of windows and it's easy as shit to see them

They are disgustingly in love, and happy, and everyday Naruto gets home and says "I'm home!" and Sasuke responds "Welcome home" with a soft smile on his lips and they have a quick kiss before Naruto goes to talk with the kids, and after that, when Sasuke is all done with his chores and things like that, they'll sit in the front porch side by side, holding hands, and watch the kids run around and play or train around the forest, Naruto will talk abt his day and ask Sasuke about his, and they'll be the most fulfilled they've ever been in their entire lives

[anyon-else]

I Set A Fire to My Soul (I Hope It Ate 'Till It Was Full) (The Red Room pt.9) | You realize after spending two weeks at the compound that existing peacefully actually seems like a plausible way of spending your life. It makes you feel free, a feeling that you're wholly unfamiliar with. It's something you want to get used to. (Marvel AU) – spotify playlist | read on ao3

Pairings | Kakashi Hatake x Black Widow!Reader + Sakura Haruno, Sasuke Uchiha, Naruto Uzumaki, Orochimaru (mentioned), Kabuto Yakushi (mentioned)

Warnings | female!reader, fluff!!! some hurt/comfort, not much this time around (just you wait though)

Word count | 6.4k

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At first glance, Kakashi's room was sparse of anything but a few pictures and a small potted plant in the window. It was the opposite of Sakura's room, which was teeming with decor and testaments to things she was interested in before she was taken. Seeing it had been like seeing a version of Sakura that you'd never had the chance to meet. A happier version.

But Kakashi's room gave little away.

You weren't exactly sure what you were seeking from Kakashi, and you almost wished he'd suggest something for you to do. You were standing awkwardly by the door as the man gathered a few books from his bed and set them aside. You eyed the newly-emptied space and wondered if it was too late to back out the door and shut yourself in your room.

But the thought of being alone again made your stomach twist in fear rather than nervousness. This was easy compared to the idea of dreaming of Orochimaru again. You were having trouble coping with the hold that he still had on you in your dreams.

"You can sleep in the bed, if you'd like. I can sleep on the floor, or–"

"No, don't. I'm imposing on you, I shouldn't take your bed too."

You both eyed the rather sizable space on the mattress, and you were sure that Kakashi was turning over the same idea that you were. Sharing a bed didn't seem all that different from sleeping together in the tent, but this wasn't something you were doing out of necessity. This was born out of fear and crippling solitude.

"I...don't want you to do anything you're not comfortable with."

Were you comfortable with Kakashi? It felt like you were, but you couldn't remember when exactly that shift had taken place. On the mission, when you'd accepted that you had to rely on him to watch your back? Or at his house when you spent nights getting a few hours of light sleep on the couch with him.

Admittedly, his bed looked much more comfortable than his couch.

"It's fine," you took a hesitant step towards his bed, glaring at it like it was an obstacle, "I don't mind."

He clearly didn't believe you, but he shrugged, slipped under his covers, and picked his book back up. No expectations or demands, but not a rejection either. It was a new type of kindness that made something in your chest loosen.

You slipped carefully under the covers on the opposite side of the bed, leaving enough room so that you wouldn't shift and touch Kakashi in your sleep.

The mattress sank with your added weight, and you turned on your side to face Kakashi, eyes cracked open. As much as you wanted to avoid looking at him for fear of getting flustered, you still couldn't bring yourself to put your back to someone who wasn't Sakura. This was all so new. Trusting someone enough to keep them out of sight while you slept was one too many obstacles for the night.

But your quick heartbeat wasn't the same as it had been during your panic attack. It wasn't a feeling that threatened to consume you. It was just a reminder that you were in close proximity to Kakashi.

You were starting to accept that there was something about being in his presence that made sleeping through the night peaceful. That something also seemed to make the logical side of your mind shut down.

That night, Kakashi woke up gasping for air.

He knew that being next to you wouldn't give him a one-hundred percent success rate for restful nights, but he'd at least hoped that he wouldn't have to deal with waking from a nightmare in front of you so soon. Maybe after you'd both gotten used to this arrangement (one that he selfishly hoped would last longer than one night).

Obito's face still lingered in front of him, and he shook away the unwanted images of his friends dead, all because he wasn't strong enough to keep them safe.

"You okay?"

He glanced down at you and chuckled at the unfamiliar picture of your eyes barely open and your face pressed against a pillow. He should've figured that you'd be a light sleeper. Next time he'd have to try and control himself after waking up. You hadn't come here just to be burdened by his nightmares.

"Yeah," he sighed, "sorry, I'm alright. Go back to sleep."

He let out a heavy sigh, resting his head in his hands and squeezing his eyes shut. He had to keep it together. At least until you had fully adjusted.

"If you want to talk about it," you said quietly, voice still groggy, "I don't mind."

He laughed, looking down at you with a small smile.

"You don't look happy to be awake right now."

"I can be awake," you shrugged. He started to protest when you shifted, but you waved him off and settled on your side.

"Lay down," you muttered, more of a suggestion than anything else, but he didn't hesitate to do as you asked. "Hold out your hand."

Again, with little hesitation and almost no thought of your motives, he extended his hand until it was midway between you and him. You mirrored the movement, and he froze from shock alone when you hooked your pinkie around his. He wondered if it was just exhaustion that was making you act without thinking, but you seemed a bit more aware now. Maybe you were just becoming comfortable with his presence faster than he'd expected.

"I used to do this with Sakura," you whispered with a fond smile. "She was troublesome. Whenever I messed up and got thrown in a cell overnight, she would always make sure she ended up there with me. There were grates between each cell with just enough space for us to do this. She wanted me to know that I wasn't alone."

Kakashi felt his chest ache at the idea of you and Sakura being imprisoned in the place that was supposed to be your home. The image of Sakura deliberately putting herself there just to do then what you were doing for him now made the gesture feel much more significant. It almost felt sacred.

"It made me feel at ease," you whispered, eyes barely open, "how do you feel now?"

In all honesty, his heart was still racing. But images of bloody bodies and comrades lost weren't haunting him anymore. He gave a hum in response and closed his eyes, focusing on the warm point of contact between you. He felt that warmth spread through the rest of his body and lull him to sleep.

He only slept for a few more hours, but he woke well-rested and found that he had an easier time fending off unwanted memories than the last time he'd jolted awake.

He also felt a strange, unfamiliar weight on his arm.

You hadn't woken yet, but you had moved at some point in the few hours since you'd both fallen asleep. Instead of just holding on to his pinkie, you had grabbed his hand and pulled it towards you, hugging his arm and tucking it into your chest.

He felt his heartbeat pick up again. He sat completely still, afraid that moving would wake you up.

He thought he'd seen what you looked like when you were at peace when you slept during the mission. Even when you spent nights on the couch, you seemed to be sleeping peacefully. Now, you almost looked happy. He swore that he saw a small smile on your face, though that could've just been his mind playing tricks on him.

He thought back to when Sakura was younger and small enough that he could lift her on his shoulders. At that age, she liked the feeling of being surrounded in a hug. He always wondered if it was the reassurance that nothing could get to her that was appealing.

Kakashi had spent his fair share of nights trying to chase away nightmares of her parents' deaths by hugging her close and keeping her tucked under his chin. He couldn't imagine that her nightmares improved while she was in the Red Room. It was likely that you had taken over for him and spent nights keeping Sakura close to try and unburden her of her fears.

Maybe you'd gotten used to having something to hold. Maybe being deprived of that now was taking more of a toll on you than you realized.

He did his best to keep still, but a few moments later, your grip on his arm and hand tightened enough that he knew you'd woken up. He glanced up and met your eyes, though you looked more confused than anything else.

"Mm..." you sucked in a breath, looking down at where you were holding Kakashi's hand. Realization dawned on you at the same moment that you threw it back at him, your confusion morphing into horror, "I'm so sorry. I didn't even realize–"

"It's alright."

"I didn't mean to...make you uncomfortable or anything."

"You didn't."

"Oh," you huffed, turning on your back and staring up at the ceiling, "okay. Good."

He wanted to ask if you remembered waking up last night, either to give you some peace of mind that he'd been perfectly comfortable with you touching him or to determine whether or not it was drowsiness that made you so open to comforting him. But you looked embarrassed enough as it was, so he kept his mouth shut.

"Thank you for letting me stay here," you said quietly, "I appreciate it."

"Anytime."

You nodded, giving him a small, half-hearted smile before you were on your feet and heading towards the door. He sat up and watched you go, searching for the right words.

"I mean it," he rushed out before you could rush out. You glanced back, expression unreadable, "really. You can sleep here anytime you want."

It shouldn't have been this hard to talk to someone, but he felt himself second-guessing all of his words just to make sure they were the right ones. He wanted to figure out how to talk to you in a way that made you feel at peace.

"Okay," you nodded, "thank you."

He didn't expect you to accept his offer, but that night, you were in front of his door once again.

Two weeks later

Sakura woke up far earlier than she would've liked with stiff limbs and excess energy to burn off. Her room had enough space that she could stretch out on the floor and try to loosen up, but she still felt an ache in her legs that she knew was a result of cutting off her training so abruptly after her escape. She had gotten used to an intense daily routine in the Red Room, and while it wasn't the most pleasant form of training, she almost missed starting her mornings with activity.

It had been nearly two months since she was given permission by her doctors to spar. And while she didn't want to bother you to train with her, Naruto and Sasuke wouldn't be as much fun. They didn't know the tricks and techniques that she'd learned in the four years that she'd been gone, and they'd have to take time to get used to her new fighting style. That morning, she found herself itching for a challenge.

Your room was only one door down from hers, and she hadn't pondered much on the habitual silence coming from it day after day since you'd returned. She knew that you were light on your feet, but around her you weren't as careful. You'd never felt the need to hide your presence from her. She helped you get used to the idea that you were allowed to take up space. That you didn't need to conceal your presence like a ghost everywhere you went.

When she opened the door and peaked into your room, she was only slightly concerned to find it empty. In fact, it looked untouched. She didn't even see your small bag of clothes next to the bed where you usually kept it.

Were you out? No, you wouldn't have left without telling her. Maybe you were already in the gym? Did you go for a run? Were you making breakfast? It was five in the morning, no one was up yet and the compound was silent. She could hear her own footsteps echoing in the hallway; she would've heard you if you were wandering around.

She didn't start worrying until she had stopped in all of the main rooms of the compound and found them vacant.

It wasn't like you to disappear without a word. You knew how worried she'd get if you left without telling her, so she was confident that if you had left of your own volition, she would've been the first to know. That left one option: you had been taken. Maybe HYDRA had taken you, or SHIELD had found out that you were staying here.

In her panic, she realized that she needed to tell Kakashi-sensei that you had disappeared. While there were quite a few plausible explanations for your absence, all of them seemed less likely than the worst-case scenarios. Sakura wasn't used to not knowing where you were, and it was making her panic grow by the second.

She sprinted down the hall, mind racing through possible explanations faster than she could keep up with them, and her panic had grown enough by the time she reached Kakashi's room that she disregarded any need for privacy.

"Kakashi-sensei," she gasped as she opened his door, swinging it against the wall with a bang, "I can't find..."

Oh.

"Uh..."

What? What?

You were...in Kakashi-sensei's room. You were in Kakashi-sensei's bed. Kakashi-sensei was in the shower and the door was shut, and you were sitting under his covers like you had slept there. Had you slept there? What was going on?

Sakura felt like she had fallen into an alternate universe.

You were staring at Sakura like she was a ghost. In fact, she wasn't sure she had ever seen that expression on your face before. She had seen worry and fear, but never this mix of shock and embarrassment. She wished she had a camera.

"What are you doing here?" you said through grit teeth after a long silence. You glanced between Sakura standing shocked in the hallway and the closed bathroom door where the shower was still running.

"What am I doing here?" Sakura let out a disbelieving laugh, "what are you doing here? Does Kakashi-sensei know that you're in his room?"

"Wha-of course he does! It's not what you think, nothing is going on, but you need to leave! You can't just walk into people's rooms!" you said. You looked like you were aging years in the seconds that Sakura was standing in the doorway. You glanced back with a groan when the shower cut off, "Go, go, we'll talk later."

You stood from the bed and practically tackled her through the door. She stumbled back with a disbelieving laugh, a mix of shock and glee on her face.

"We will talk about this later," you repeated calmly, though you still looked mortified, "Just...go back to sleep or something. Do not tell the others."

The door slammed before she could say anything else, and it took her about a minute to move from in front of it. Her paralysis lasted until she heard you shuffle back to bed, and it reminded her that you weren't only sleeping in Kakashi-sensei's room, you were sleeping in his bed. She still hadn't quite recovered from the shock, and processing what she had just seen seemed like a monumental task. How had she not noticed?

Sakura nearly sprinted away from the room, rushing down the hall and opening Naruto's door in the same abrupt fashion as she had Kakashi-sensei's.

"Naruto," Sakura whispered, hoping that you hadn't hear her scampering away from Kakashi-sensei's room, "Naruto! Wake up!"

"Huh...wha-? Sakura, wha's goin' on?"

Naruto's face was pressed into his pillow, and he looked like he had no intention of getting up despite Sakura's urgent tone.

"Naruto, come on," she grinned, shaking the boy, "Y/N is in Kakashi-sensei's room."

Naruto shot up at her words, fully awake and staring at her with wide eyes. She nodded when he gave her a disbelieving laugh, grin growing wider.

"No way," he laughed again, and Sakura slapped a hand over his mouth when he opened it again.

"She'll hear you, dummy! We have to be quiet!"

Naruto looked at her wide-eyed, nodding against her hand and waiting patiently for her to deem him ready to be released.

Sasuke's room was a bit more intimidating than Naruto's, and Sakura found herself calming enough to knock quietly at his door. He opened it a moment later, rubbing his eyes and glaring at Sakura and Naruto tiredly.

"It's five in the morning," he grumbled, then perked up, "is something wrong?"

"No," Sakura shook her head at the same time that Naruto gleefully said, "yes!"

Sasuke looked unimpressed.

"Y/N is in Kakashi-sensei's room!"

While Kakashi-sensei had trained his charges extensively in stealth, they seemed to forget all of their lessons as they stumbled down the hall to his room. Naruto couldn't stop giggling as he raced down the hall, and Sasuke looked more shocked that Sakura had ever seen him.

This was new and very exciting territory. Kakashi-sensei had never had a...

A what? A girlfriend? The idea of you being someone's girlfriend felt wrong to Sakura; it was so...normal.

"What do we do?" Naruto whispered, backing away from Kakashi's door like it was a wild animal.

"There's no way this is happening," Sasuke whispered, head in his hands and voice very distressed, "what is going on?"

"This is weird, right?" Naruto whispered nervously, "I mean, we're just...sitting outside of his room."

"We need answers!" Sakura grinned. "This has never happened before. I mean, Kakashi-sensei? No one ever sleeps in his room with him!"

When had this happened? She was wracking her brain to create a timeline of events, but she was coming up empty. Maybe something had changed on the mission.

That would be so romantic.

Footsteps sounded on the other side of the door, and she heard you mumbling something to Kakashi as you approached.

"Hide!" Sakura whispered, though not as quietly as she would've liked. All three of them stumbled to their feet, and Sakura groaned at their luck when Naruto tripped over Sasuke and took both of them down. She grabbed them by the back of their shirts and tried dragging them to their feet and out of sight, but the door clicked open before she could begin moving them at all.

"Jesus," you gasped, backing away from the three with a hand over your chest. Sakura supposed they probably looked like a comedy skit, all tangled up on the floor and looking at you like deer in headlights.

"What?" Kakashi said from out of sight. When he appeared, Sakura almost laughed.

He was wearing a fluffy grey robe that was tied tightly around his waist. His hair was dripping from the shower, and he was maskless.

"No way," Sasuke muttered again, followed by a delighted laugh from Naruto.

There was a long moment when the five of you just stared at one another. Then Kakashi nudged you out of the way, grabbed the door, and slammed it shut.

"What are you doing?" you hissed at him. He was red to the tops of his ears, and he was looking just about anywhere to avoid meeting your eyes. "Now they'll be even more suspicious!"

"I was caught off guard!" he whispered back, voice low enough that the kids would only be able to hear if they were pressed against door. The thought had you glancing at the shadows under the crack of the wood. You narrowed your eyes and kicked it.

"Ow," Naruto shouted, followed by two identical shushes from Sasuke and Sakura. You scowled.

"I'm never going to have a day of peace again," Kakashi grumbled, "they'll never let me live this down."

"Maybe because you slammed the door in their faces. You look like a teenager who was caught by their parents."

"I've never had to deal with this before!" he threw his hands in the air, "even if it's just for nightmares, they'll be insufferable. All of the questions..."

His face fell into lethargic horror at the thought.

"Don't be dramatic," you huffed. You opened the door in one swing and glared down at the three brats falling at your feet. Sakura met your glare with an innocent smile.

"Good morning," she smiled. You glared harder, "it's lovely out today. Wanna go on a walk?"

"No," you grumbled, "I want peace."

"We want answer-mmhp," Naruto shouted over Sakura shoulder, cut off by her hand blindly slapping backwards and landing over his mouth. She held it there and gave you another innocent smile.

"Listen, all three of you. I will say this one time and one time only."

The kids all froze, and you even noticed Kakashi stop in his tracks to look at you.

"I have nightmares, and being next to someone at night helps. That's all."

"Aw man," Naruto grumbled, turning towards Sasuke, "we thought Kakashi-sensei had a girlfriend."

"Hey," Kakashi stuck his head through the door, now fully dressed and slightly less red than before, "all of you go run three miles."

"Wha–, sensei," Sakura groaned, "what were we supposed to think? You were practically naked–"

"Four miles."

"But–"

"Five."

"Fine, fine, geez."

Naruto and Sakura sulked towards the gym, but Sasuke paused and gave you a long glance. It didn't hold any of his previous coldness; now it was just curiosity that lingered in his gaze. Once he was apparently satisfied with his observation, he glanced at Kakashi and tilted his head, then turned and followed Sakura and Naruto down the hall.

"Good morning," you muttered to a wide-eyed Kakashi. He looked like he had gone into overdrive, and you imagined he was picturing the horrors that would come that day as a result of this incident. Five miles wouldn't do much good to deter them from being insufferable.

"Right," Kakashi sighed, "great morning. Once I leave this room, I'll live the rest of my life being tortured."

"Oh, please," you waved his concerns away, "how bad could they be?"

"You clearly haven't spent enough time with all three of them together," Kakashi mumbled, "they feed off of one another. They're evil."

"Dramatic," you repeated, glaring pointedly at the mask that he was pulling over his nose. He shrugged.

When you left Kakashi's room, it didn't take long for you to run into Naruto. He was standing in the doorway that led into the gym, watching Sakura and Sasuke spar disinterestedly. When he saw you next to him, he perked up. It was the first time you'd ever gotten such an enthused reaction from the boy.

"Hey," he looked behind you, presumably for Kakashi, "can I, uh...talk to you?"

Interesting, but not as weird as it would have been if he hadn't just discovered you sleeping in his guardian's room. You leaned against the opposite side of the doorframe and tried to look as open and safe as possible.

"I thought you were supposed to be running?" you asked.

"Nah, Kakashi-sensei's never serious about that stuff," Naruto laughed, and you couldn't help a small smile. Kakashi really was like a father to them, and you desperately hoped Naruto didn't see you and this newfound closeness as a threat to him.

"I just wanted to...ask what your intentions are, I guess? With Kakashi-sensei."

You almost laughed at the question, but Naruto looked dead serious. You glanced at Sakura and Sasuke and saw that they hadn't stopped sparring to look at you and Naruto. So this conversation was likely happening independent of their input.

"I don't have any intentions," you said simply, "what I told you is all there is. It's a mutually beneficial arrangement, that's all."

Naruto didn't look convinced, but he moved on quickly.

"We didn't exactly meet on great terms, but I know from what Sakura's told me and from what I've seen that you're a good person. It's just that...Kakashi-sensei doesn't have that many people that he relies on. He has friends, sure, but they're more like...coworkers. He goes on missions with them, so he always feels like he has a responsibility to keep them safe. He doesn't really let his guard down much. I don't know why, but he doesn't act that way with you."

You weren't sure how you felt about being told that you were unique in someone's eyes. For most of your life, you were simply a cog in a machine. There was nothing about you that differed from your fellow Widows. You were basically a copy of the girls who came before.

"He lets his guard down around you. And he does that with us too, but he's our guardian. I think your presence is like...a reassurance that he can unwind without worrying that someone will get hurt. He's always looking out for us, never letting himself rest, so maybe you can take some of that weight off of him. Keep him from taking on too much."

"I think you're overestimating how much he trusts me."

"No," Naruto smiled, and you tried to reconcile the boy standing in front of you giving you rather wise advice with the one who had come poking around your cell when you first met, "he does. I think it makes him nervous how much he does."

"How can you tell?"

"Dunno," Naruto shrugged, "but we spend every day with him. We notice when things have changed. And all three of us have noticed it. He's more relaxed."

Did he seem more relaxed? You supposed that you hadn't known him before, so you didn't have anything to compare it to, but it was hard to imagine Kakashi being even more vigilant than he already was. You wondered just how much stress he was under on a day-to-day basis.

"Please don't leave," Naruto muttered. Your eyes widened, and you had to stop yourself from letting out a shocked laugh, "if you do, it won't just hurt Sakura. It'll hurt him too. I don't think he even realizes that, but it will. And none of us want to see that happen."

"I don't think–"

"It's true."

"Shit–" you jumped away from Sasuke, who had somehow managed to stand behind you and listen in on the conversation without you noticing, "again? Seriously, this shouldn't keep happening. I'm supposed to be a spy."

"Maybe you're distracted because you're talking about Kakashi-sensei," Sakura said with a sly smile. You narrowed your eyes at her.

"Why would I be distracted?"

"Oh, no reason," she shrugged, taking Naruto and Sasuke by the arms and dragging them back to the middle of the gym, "no reason at all."

Distracted. You weren't easily distracted, and Kakashi was low on the list of people who could throw you off balance. Orochimaru and Kabuto were distracting. Kakashi was just Kakashi. He didn't stop you from breathing. He sometimes made it easier.

That wasn't distraction.

You pushed Sakura's irritatingly cryptic words aside and joined Sasuke next to the mats, watching Naruto have a significant amount of trouble taking Sakura down. Both were laughing, and even Sasuke had a fond smile on his face as he studied the match. You noticed that he was paying more attention to Sakura than Naruto, eyes focused on her footwork as she side-stepped her opponent's attack and knocked him to the ground.

"How come," Naruto panted, stretching out the shoulder that he'd landed on when he fell, "I can't keep up with you anymore? It's not fair."

"How do you think I feel? I miss having sparring partners who can actually put up a fight"

"Hey!"

"Kidding, kidding," Sakura laughed, turning away from a sputtering Naruto. "Oh. good morning, Kakashi-sensei. Sleep well?"

"I slept fine, thank you for asking, Sakura," Kakashi spoke smoothly, no trace of his previous embarrassment in his voice, "and you?"

"Oh, it was a bit lonely," she shrugged, "but I suppose you wouldn't understand that problem."

Sasuke snickered, then became conveniently enraptured by the opposite wall when you glared at him.

"Hey, Kakashi-sensei could take you down!" Naruto told Sakura, pointing at the man excitedly.

"Of course he could," Sakura scoffed, "I didn't train that hard."

She glanced at you, and in some sudden revelation, her eyes widened and she jumped off of the mats. You let her hurriedly push you onto them in her place with just a bit of resistance and a dead expression on your face.

"Spar Kakashi-sensei!"

You gave her a flat look, wholly uninterested in sparring at the moment. You needed breakfast. You were also in the middle of a good part of Icha-Icha, but you'd been too tired last night to keep reading. You'd been looking forward to returning to it all morning.

"I'm tired."

"No, you're not. You slept great."

"You're such a little shit," you grumbled, glaring at her, then at Naruto and Sasuke with equal amounts of contempt, "all of you."

Naruto was grinning and trying to pull an equally as inconvenienced-looking Kakashi onto the mats with you.

"Don't you three want food? I know none of you can cook."

"Cook after!"

"Maybe I won't want to after."

"We'll go out."

All three were watching you and Kakashi eagerly. Sakura looked conflicted, like she was trying to decide who she should place her bets on.

"Did you three finish your five miles?"

"Of course we did!"

"Pretty quick for a couple of short stacks."

"Hey!"

You snickered, ignoring Sakura's glare.

"Fine," Kakashi said, meeting your unimpressed stare with a smile, "but I expect you to observe carefully. You'll be seeing two different fighting styles, so pay close attention to the strengths and weaknesses of both."

"Kakashi-sensei," Naruto groaned, "why does everything have to be training?"

"Oh, I'm sorry, Naruto," Kakashi turned his smile from you to the sulking boy, "would you prefer to write me an essay on this instead?"

"No! Not at all, I'll watch very diligently."

"Good," Kakashi nodded, then turned to you, "well, this feels familiar."

"Right," you scoffed, "because last time was just so much fun."

Sakura was looking between you and Kakashi with wide eyes, and you didn't want to imagine what kinds of assumptions she was making about your comment. You ignored her questioning gaze and steadied yourself in front of your opponent, hands raised in a defensive position.

Kakashi still had his hands in his pockets, and in the split second that you wondered if you should attack first, he was gone.

He's quick, you thought with a scowl, though not quick enough that you couldn't detect his presence behind you. You stepped forward just as his leg attempted to kick yours from under you, and you barely missed getting thrown to the ground as you spun towards him.

You heard a mix of shouts from the kids, and most of them were encouragements for Kakashi as you continuously sidestepped his attacks.

But he was the only one attacking. You were just trying to keep up.

He had you cornered, and you let out a frustrated grunt when you felt your foot hit the edge of the mat. Kakashi barely paused, so you settled on a rather crude attack and leapt at him, grabbing him around the waist and pulling him to the ground.

He landed on his back with a surprised grunt, though it didn't take him long to recover. This time, though, you had the upper hand on him. Your attacks were swifter, but they had less power behind them. One technique that was encouraged in the Red Room was to tire an opponent out with fast attacks until they couldn't counter one with increased strength. It was especially useful for stronger opponents like Kakashi, who used more raw strength in his offense.

The match continued for far longer than you would've liked. You'd thought that you'd have an easier time beating him, but you wondered if he would actually manage to take you down. You were on fairly even footing in terms of skill, you'd known that from the beginning, but you knew enough tricks that you thought you'd have the edge on him.

It seemed you'd underestimated his strategies. It must've been a lingering feeling of superiority over SHIELD that rubbed off on you from Orochimaru.

You were even more surprised when, in your momentary distraction, Kakashi reused his move from the beginning of the fight and swept your legs out from under you. You landed with an oof on the mat, head knocking against it and arm aching where your gunshot wound had almost finished healing. You probably shouldn't have been sparring, but curiosity about Kakashi's skill in close combat took precedent over concern for your still-healing injuries.

"If I hadn't gotten shot," you panted, looking up at Kakashi's pleased expression, "I would've won."

"Of course you would've," he said jovially, mood apparently lifted by his victory. He held out a hand, and you took it begrudgingly, allowing him to haul you to your feet.

You narrowed your eyes at the hushed voices behind you and glanced back at Sakura, who was whispering something in Naruto's ear that made him grin and giggle.

"Did you learn anything useful?" you ruffled her hair, pushing her head to the side playfully and sidestepping her when she tried to shove you.

"Oh, sure," she laughed, "lots of things."

Naruto laughed again, and even Sasuke cracked a small smile.

"You guys are weird," you huffed, stretching your arms above your head and following Kakashi out of the gym.

Later that night, after you'd successfully finished your Icha-Icha volume and ranted about it extensively to an amused Kakashi, you were pulled into Sakura's room hastily and rather aggressively on your way back to the gym. You stumbled inside on ungraceful feet, tripping over them as you tried to catch yourself. Sakura offered no help; she glanced out into the hall once you were inside, then closed the door quietly behind her.

"You know, you could've just asked if you wanted me in here."

She shrugged, then leapt into her bed and patted the spot next to her in invitation.

"Can I ask you something?" she said once you had settled in on the empty side. You hummed your assent, sitting up and giving her your full attention when you saw how serious her expression looked.

"Are you...happy here?"

The hope in her eyes was so clear that you had to look away. She wanted you to say yes more than anything, but it wasn't that simple. happiness was never that simple, especially when you had never really thought about your own happiness at any point in your life. It had never been enough of a priority.

Now that you thought about it, you weren't even sure what it meant to be happy. How were you supposed to tell? How could you even give her a truthful answer without knowing it for yourself?

"I...don't know," you told her honestly. Her hopeful expression didn't fade, and she nodded like she had been expecting that answer. "I'm comfortable. I feel safe here."

She smiled, and you couldn't help but mirror it. You hadn't realized how much you missed spending time with Sakura; it had been a while since you'd been able to sit down and talk like this, just the two of you. You realized somberly that it was the first time you'd been able to do it outside of the Red Room.

"You're smiling a lot more," she told you happily. You looked at her, brows furrowed. Had you smiled more? You didn't feel all that different, but you supposed that the person you'd been when you escaped with her was a far cry from who you were becoming. It hadn't even been long, and she already saw that much change?

But now that you thought about it, you saw the change too. Your nightmares were becoming more infrequent, and you no longer felt the constant pull of the Red Room and of Orochimaru's promises. They appeared to you as a distant memory; a thing of the past.

You tried to remember when you'd stopped assuming that you would eventually go back. When you'd accepted that you were no longer a Widow.

You wondered when you had become okay with that fact.

"I'm so happy," Sakura laughed, silent tears rolling down her cheeks, "none of it even feels real."

"What do you mean?"

"This," she motioned towards you vaguely, then towards the door where you could hear Naruto and Sasuke talking to Kakashi from the lounge, "you being here. Everyone being safe. For the first time in almost five years, I'm surrounded by people I care about. And you're smiling so much, I just..."

Her words were becoming more strained, like she was trying to keep herself from bursting into tears. You reached towards her on instinct, and she was quick to lean into you and wrap her arms around your waist. She was crying quietly into your chest, gripping your shirt and muffling the sounds of her cries in the fabric. You buried a hand in her hair and tucked her head under your chin in a familiar set of movements.

"I'm so happy," she cried quietly, pulling you closer and sniffling. You rubbed her back, unsure of how to respond. You felt something swell in your chest; this was the first time that Sakura had cried in your arms because of something good happening. The last time she'd done it, it was because you were leaving. You had been reassigned after your mission together, and her terrified cries often haunted your nightmares.

"I...I think I'm happy," you whispered. She paused; it almost felt like her breathing had stopped. "and I want to stay. I am staying. If...if you and the others will have me."

"Of course," she laughed, though it sounded more like a sob as she tackled you to the bed. You chuckled, wrapping your arms around her and relishing in the lightness in your chest. It was such a new feeling. It was freeing. Maybe that was what happiness felt like.

If it was, it was something that you wanted to get used to.

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Author's note | ahhhh i'm so excited about this chapter. i've had it started for a while so i'm glad to finally get it published. also, i have this series planned to the end, but i'm absolutely love writing it, so would anyone be interested in a sequel series (that i've already begun planning)?

anyways, as always, let me know what you think and leave me some love if you enjoyed!

title is from "Trust" by Lucy Dacus

[momowho34]

Time for another naruto au post that so long and complicated it might aswell be a fic in and of itself. Why am I like this :,) Naruto au where Itachi runs away from the village with Sasuke in tow and doesn’t leave him behind. Also Itachi is a little older then a teenager because it makes more sense. Buckle up this is a long one.

Itachi refuses to kill his family and runs to warn them but when he gets there everybody’s dead except for Sasuke, (who witnessed the whole thiNG OOPSY-) so he takes him and runs for their lives.

Itachi joins the akatsuki but uhhhhh now there’s a four year old tagging along and Itachi’s too scary for anybody to mention it.

Imagine the fluff and angst potential with the akatsuki oooooof there’s so much omg

At first they all think it’s super annoying but within like two days they would all gladly die for this kid. Seriously they were pretty sure their hearts were made of stone at this point but apparently not.

Kisame is surprisingly really good with kids, partly because he appears fairly calm on the outside without being too standoffish so Sasuke likes him best. Also Kisame could happily play peek-a-boo for the rest of his life he likes the small things

Kakazu is awful with kids but sasuke likes him anyway and he hates it (not really) Hidan.... really doesn’t know what to do. He’s never cared about another person in his life, okay? He kind of wants to kill the small child but he knows Itachi would steal his fucking knee caps and bury him at the bottom of the ocean so he doesn’t even mention it ever

Sasori is the mom when Itachi isn’t around. They would all feed him candy until he fucking died if Sasori didn’t stop that. Sasori is also the one to go “oh my GOD Deidara you can’t dare him to climb that mountain he could fall and hit his head no I don’t care about that deidaRA HE IS SEVEN YEARS OLD ITACHI IS GOING TO KILL YOU WHEN HE GETS HOME MARK MY WORDS—“

Tobi likes to blame all of his mistakes on Sasuke as a joke. Also they all teach Sasuke bits of their fighting styles so he becomes even more formidable and all of them are kind of freaked out by how quickly he masters their techniques

When he’s too young to tag along on missions he has to stay with Konan and Pain. He really values Konan because she’s really the only one of them who treats him like a person instead of a stupid child that needs protection.

“He costs too much,” Kakazu says. “He shouldn’t be here, what about how much it costs for him to stay with us” all while consistently finding room in the budget to get the kid anything and everything even though he’s fairly low maintenance to take care of

When Itachi arrives, everybody tries to disregard the rumors paired with Sasuke being there. Because of Itachi’s overall demeanor and Sasuke’s refusal to talk about it, they assume that he killed his family but didn’t kill his little brother for some reason

...And then Sasuke starts having nightmares. Like loud, screaming and crying in the middle of the night nightmares. Every time it happens, Itachi wakes up, calm and collected, and holds him until he falls asleep again. They all start having doubts about Itachi really killing his family.

Itachi doesn’t really hold a grudge against Konoha, but he didn’t see the whole family die like Sasuke did. Sasuke wants revenge, and he’s dead set on it.

Okay yeah but what abt the actual plot and stuff??? Don’t worry I’m there.

So a while later after that during Naruto’s three year journey (which he still takes with Jiraiya because he needs training to fight Orochimaru who is still a big threat btw) he meets this weird black haired kid staying at the same hotel he is.

Turns out they’ve both got caretakers who are absent (Jiraiya’s at a brothel somewhere and Kisame and Itachi are off killing some guy) which sucks so they bond over that and compare abilities and beat the shit out of eachother a little and develop a mini rival complex all of that but then

“Wow you’re so cool! You fight just like a ninja! You should come back with me!” Naruto laughs one day. Sasuke asks “Back to where?” And Naruto’s like “back to the leaf village of course! I’m a leaf village ninja, I’m out here training with my sensei! I forgot that I left my headband in the room, I can show it to you.” But Sasuke just gets really pale and runs off and Naruto doesn’t see him for the rest of the trip.

He thought he’d never see him again but then Sasuke gets separated from the Akatsuki members reeeaaaallly far away from their base and Konoha. As he’s trying to figure out what to do, a certain ninja crew happens to be in town. Naruto is like “omfg I know this kid!!!!!!!! Hey Sasuke!!!!! Hey Sasukeeeee!!!!!”

Sasuke is like o-o but then he starts to consider his options. If anybody figures out about his sharingan, he’s straight up fucked. His eyes are gone, he probably gets murdered. Naruto is like “what r u doing here????” And sasuke spins a fairly convincing story

He’s like “oh yeah and I know my way around this place so I can help you out could I maybe seek asylum in your village maybe??? I could be helpful” just so he can head in the general direction of Konoha and hopefully get closer to his base along the way.

So Kakashi begrudgingly agrees and Sasuke tries not to burn alive because he’s in the general proximity of leaf soldiers that he fucking hates and he will not grow attached to any of them at all no siree, not at all, no way!

Sasuke begins to grow close to them, of course. Sai and Sasuke do goth shenanigans and he fights with Naruto and tries to get Sakura to leave him alone (what is up with her why is she being so weird?)

Oh bonus angst: Tobi used to talk in his sleep sometimes, and at some point Sasuke drops “those who break the rules are scum, but those who leave their friends behind are worse then scum” casually and Kakashi almost has a full blown panic attack.

This is when he first realizes something is seriously up with this kid; and his first name sounds... familiar. His suspicions are just suspicions until they run into Orochimaru. Now Orochimaru could just out Sasuke as akatsuki, instead he plays with his feelings a little bit. He keeps saying things like “how does it feel to fight on the same side as your enemies for once?” And “have you forgotten already?” They defeat him without Sasuke revealing his sharingan but the jig is up in Kakashi’s mind.

Kakashi doesn’t quite connect the dots; but he’s almost there. Whoever this kid is, they’re coming back to the village for sure. It’s the safest thing to do. Meanwhile the Akatsuki are freaking out. Itachi is unhinged and almost grieving, they have no idea where Sasuke could be. The team is out in full force; including Tobi

And you know, Obito doesn’t care. He shouldn’t care, nothing matters in this false reality. It just doesn’t. Tobi might have given a shit about Sasuke, but Tobi isn’t real. He’s just a front, Tobi doesn’t exist. So why is he looking so hard for this stupid kid that he shouldn’t give a shit about? Obito convinces himself it’s just a front, it’s just part of Tobi’s act, but it’s not. What’s happening to him? Why is starting to feel things now, so deep into the plan?

Annnnnndddd that’s as far as I got with it lmao. That’s still pretty fucking far tho

[chatonyant]

Meet Tart, an oc which i’ve shoved into far too many aus that at this point there is no original lmAOO 

Anywho, presenting this is,,, kinda embarrassing but I hope you guys like him! I’ll add story snippets below the cut, it’s all purely self indulgent fun 

uhhhhhh i have no idea why that first picture is on its side, it’s not anywhere else and i have no idea how to fix it :( edit: postingg it fixed it tumblr whatthefukc

Tart is a bastard Nara (because i wanted him to have shadows; it was a prominent theme of this oc) and is around Kakashi’s age, a year or two younger? Anywho, they end up tentative friends when they were kids because Tart learns sealing from Kushina so it’s interaction via proximity. Tart as an adult is a smug, sly bastard with a flirty streak who’s as graceful as a dancer. He’s a smooth talker around others and friendly and soft with kids, and his greatest strength as a ninja is that he’s fast and accurate. Not a tanker at all, he’s more of what a stereotypical ninja would be. As a kid he’s quiet and observant, logical and a bit stoic. He doesn’t care too much for the rules but also doesn’t go out of his way to break them. So as kids Kakashi and him had a bit of a mutual respect for each other. 

He’s ANBU (i put cat cause i couldn’t think of anything else-- sorry tenzou), and tends to be sent on long term infiltration missions because he’s really good at acting and seduction i mean manipulation (both???) 

Kakashi and Tart both have a “mask”, but when they’re together in private, there’s no reason to keep it up any longer; they’ve been through a lot together and are rather similar, though they show it in different ways. 

Gai and Tart are also friends, and it’s horrible for Kakashi because Tart is a filthy filthy enabler

Tart is taller than Kakashi and boy does he tease the shit out of Kakashi for it