#realizing that what he did wasn't right not just to victor but to the actual victims themselves who never did him any harm

[navree]

once again on my frankenstein bullshit because i’m sure it’s a very nice bookend but it is baffling that so many fix it attempts for this story are built on frankenstein asking the creature’s forgiveness in the arctic because like??? no??? the only time victor was ever in the position of “hey you should really say sorry to this guy” is after he first ran away. everything else after that should be the creature fucking groveling and saying “hey sorry i murdered your brother and then framed your friend so she’d be executed and then murdered your boyfriend and the murdered your wife which made your dad weaken and die”  because in the scales of who’s been wronged more, guy whose father was mean to him is very much trumped by guy who had everyone he loves wiped the fuck out because his son threw a temper tantrum. 

sorry.

[givehimthemedicine]

house arrest and boarded up homes

I was thinking about how the only times we ever see Vecna anywhere except at the Creel house (I mean literally in Vecna form) it's in visions, right? which he's conducting from the UD attic, really? can he leave the house?

so then I got thinking about all the "trapped at home" themes on ST and especially the boarded up exits in visions. far from a new revelation, there's not really gonna be anything "new" in this post - but I never realized how extensive it is (this isn't even attempting to be a complete roundup due to photo limit) or thought about what that means for him

OKAY Creelers, your homes are prisons... we got it... smth smth Karen trying to trap her kids at home and in turn being trapped there herself by allying with Brenner...

anyway onto the actual horror boards thing - not all Vecna visions have them.

Fred's visions, Chrissy's clock and bathroom visions, and Max's clock, mom and Billy visions do not have the boards imagery. those are also all the ones which happened outside of or not involving their homes, both in terms of the vision's setting and where the victim physically was while experiencing it.

but the visions set inside of homes got boards [and those are all also the ones experienced while inside of homes irl, though not necessarily those same homes] - the Cunningham house in Chrissy's final vision, the lab in Nancy's (not a house but was technically his home for most of his life, and is referred to as home by Brenner), and ofc Max's in the Creel house.

(honorable mention for Victor's war vision, which wasn't boarded up in the sense of the others, but it was both experienced from and set in a home, and there is some very similar blue-lit-boards imagery in the bombed house. I know there's some question as to who actually did this one but it sorta works)

and when we get to the actual Creel house, whoooboy do we go hard on the boards thing. both in the sense of the IRL house being all boarded up so that the kids have to pry plywood off that door to get in, and of the actual horror boards vision being so much more extensive than Chrissy's or Nancy's.

btw guess how many different boarded up exits Max encounters in her vision? 4. teehee get it

ok, any more homes/boards stuff outside of the st4 visions?

this is kinda Will trying to escape his house, the UD of it anyway. and depending in what way Will's UD experience was affected by what went on in the RU, consider the impys of Lonnie "repairing" that hole, from Will's pov. even if Will didn't literally get the horror boards treatment in there, as a result of this, still. Themes TM

and then much later we have Jon and Nancy boarding up the broken cabin window. yeah I know this is to stop bad guys getting in, not good guys getting out. but is it giving "horror boards but from the wrong pov" again? is this any support for the idea of the final scene being Will's Vecna vision?

and then of course there's the way that that cabin was El's former home, yet also very much a place she wanted to escape from - as was every other place El has ever called home, however briefly. in most cases the word "prison" actually does pop up eventually:

and then there's the mind lair being the fubar Creel house, and the fact that in no mind lair scenes do we ever see Vecna set foot outside of the bounds of the house, right?

in the Dear Billy vision, when it was Vecna in Max's head, he was able to chase her all around the graveyard when she ran. but when Max somehow got into his head, and then Kate Bushed it outta there, he just stood there looking grumpy and tried to stop her by making house parts fall on her, like he couldn't follow her.

[side note: if he HAD scored a direct hit, what then? send a vine out to drag her back? he stopped her that way before, why didn't he just do that again? can his vines not reach beyond the bounds of the mindscape house either?]

even the Piggyback moment where El comes-to and sees him carrying Max in (which. WHY?) he's already well within the house area.

thematically it makes sense that he would be trapped in his own mindscape. psychologically stuck in his trauma... prison of his own making type of thing.. etc etc

image limit. go on without me:

"they're still with me (taps head) in here"

Vecna getting trapped against one of those pillars in his own mindscape by El

boarded up doors imagery vs Flayed Billy and VecnaChrissysmom "open the goddamn door" (not to mention a trillion other instances of "open the door" and door imagery)

Victor telling the story of their home and his trauma from in an actual prison cell (nvm the whole Hopper prison plot)

Kali / Brenner / festering

Pennhurst "can't they just escape?" "they could, but the vast majority choose to be here"

leave your train station

and the only time I can think of that we see Vecna physically outside his house in the UD is when Nancy shoots him though the (boarded up) attic window, after which he disappears somehow. was whatever happened there (at least in part) a consequence of having gone out-of-bounds?

lab duels / if you leave your circle, you lose

Terry stuck reliving her trauma in her dream circle

you have already lost / no you have... etc etc

on first watch I figured he could do whatever and go wherever he wanted but chose to stay at home (like how Will hid at home in the UD)(actually ig I'm basing that on a lot of assumptions) but actually I don't see support for that unless I'm missing something huge.

anyway. just me rolling in the themes like a dog in poop 👍

[oatmealcrisp-freak]

Yuuri Katsuki has Bullied Kid energy.

Yuuri : Don't you dare see me as weak or perceive my vulnerability. Please comfort me and reassure me. I'll be constantly afraid of your reaction if I inconvenience you. Nothing scares me more than the people I trust lying to me. I'm more competent and at home in the face of people's scorn than in the face of their genuine love for me. The idea that anyone could see me as desirable is baffling. The world sees me as little more than dirt and I don't disagree with them. I am going to make them eat their teeth with their words or so help me I will set myself on fire trying. Just watch, I am the most beautiful woman in town and you will rue the day you underestimated me. How you like me now?

Victor, thinking he'd been dumped by the first person who'd made him happy in a very long time : I see this, I respect this, I am going to use the hell out of this. Hey. Hey fatty. Watch me pry the thing you love and use to cope with your feelings right out of your fingers until you lose weight. kinda reminiscent of what you did to me :) kinda sorta you know just a lil bit. You don't know what eros is? Okay, now you're just making fun of me.

Victor, after Yuuri had his katsudon eros realization : ...JFC he actually literally doesn't know. I. Uh. ...Huh. Well. Uhm. Okay. Maybe that means he doesn't get OTHER things too. He. He genuinely doesn't know what he did to me. He probably didn't even do it deliberately. Okay. Okay? Okay. I can work with this. THINK OF THE JUICY SUCCULENT PORK, BABE. ...I can't fkn believe this.

Victor, several episodes later when Yuuri reveals he literally doesn't remember the banquet: ...Well shit. The past year of my life has been a lie and I might be an asshole. Hm.

I've read some fics where after Yuuri's ED gets triggered and he crashes hard Victor looks back at all those early comments and goes 'I didn't mean it that way babe you're hot when you're fat and you weren't even that fat it was just that it could be unsafe for your joints to skate in that condition' and sure okay I get wanting to minimize the blow and Yuuri is adorable AF when he's heavier and i still enjoy those fics for the most part but

I disagree with that fully and completely cus nah, Victor's a petty lil bitch who can be cold and ruthless and isn't afraid to hurt people. Is he also warm and kind and loving and doing his best? Yes. He contains multitudes. But he was absolutely aiming to hurt, because he was hurt.

Yuuri, meanwhile, who's been bullied for a great majority of his childhood but has complete faith in Victor and unwavering confidence in his honesty - especially when that honesty fits his world view - that he has an entire Victor shaped blind spot : Eh? Pfft. He wasn't bullying me, what are you talking about? He was literally telling the truth. :/ I mean really, he was taking care of me.

Victor, falling to the ground and clutching his stomach with a groan because ooouuugghhh guilt-nausea : Y-....Yuuri.....

Yuuri : I mean Yurio can be a bully but that's just how he shows he cares so :3 Nah haha, I've had waaaay worse, trust me, lol

Yurio : ....I would very much like to be excluded from this narrative, one that I have never asked to be a part of?

Victor, convulsing :

I think Yuuri can absolutely pick up on when Victor is being dishonest with him and poking his sharp little fingers into the sore spots, but more on an intuitive level that he doesn't know how to make sense of logically, so he just accepts it and moves on largely without comment a;dlkf he'll probably figure it out like fifteen years down the road when he's older and wiser and one day he squints at his husband and goes "...huh, okay" and then never does anything about it anyway because he loves Victor and forgives him and also Victor's hot when he's being mean so

[witchhazelevesque]

I have this idea for an AU where Nemesis DOES invoke the “soul for a soul” resurrection principle with Hazel at Salt Lake and it's about to turn into a battle, but Leo jumps forward and is like, "Hey, you need a soul, okay? Well, there's mine."

Nemesis asks if he's willing to die for Hazel, and Leo's… worryingly not immediately shutting the idea down. But what he says is, "Think of it like... collateral. Like for a loan? Or, um, like an item on layaway."

"Layaway?"

"Yeah," Leo says. "Like this thing people did when they couldn't afford to buy something? The store would hold it and they'd like, pay it off in installments until it was done and get it then. It was like, credit cards for poor people."

And Nemesis knows that the kid is smart, and that he knows she's not going to kill him yet, so it's more like a vouching situation, where Leo's soul is like, carrying Hazel's? Like, it's enveloping it in a weird sort of embrace. But this protects it from the scales of balance, which even without the goddesses' direct interaction would have started affecting Hazel.

And it's fucking disturbing.

Because they barely know each other, and though Leo like. Just straight up wasn't going to let someone die in front of him when he could do something, he also didn't actually think it through. And Hazel's been at the mercy of too many people in her life, it doesn't matter if Leo's got no ill will or intention toward her.

And it makes everything so much worse.

Cause Leo's trying to squash down the idea of having a soulmate, even one that's not romantic, because that's not what this is about, but his lonely, hungry heart can't help itself. And Hazel is so confused because yes, she's grateful but she's also horrified. The whole Sammy situation still hasn't gotten resolved and it feels like her past is trying to pull her back into that suffocating cavern.

Anyway, it’s all messy and confusing and when Leo realizes he has to die he’s like… oh okay, well there’s that at least, the final payment, and all those thoughts Hazel had before about only coming back to right her wrongs and Frank’s just not been having fun and is like, totally conflicted.

But the price, death during Gaea’s defeat, mirrored in each other, two victors, one survivor, all debt paid off.

[deadbydangit]

HEHEHE YIPPEE OKOKOK so another idea that I had in mind was comforting Charlotte after a nightmare! I know she's supposed to be a big scary killer but she needs some lovins too 🥺 maybe even the reader humming her a lullaby!

- 🌱

I can do that. I'm going to add a few other characters to this. I usually have at least three characters in each post.

Comforting them after a nightmare.

Twins, Trapper, Trickster

Twins

Charlotte and Victor are light sleepers.

It's a product of their past.

So, when one is asleep, the other is always awake.

You've told them that you can keep watch so they could both sleep.

But they also need to make sure you're safe.

When Victor has a nightmare, he'll be whimpering or grinding his teeth.

Then he'll start clawing and grabbing at the air like he's trying to hold onto something.

Since Victor can't tell you what he's dreaming about, you and Charlotte can only speculate.

She's come to the conclusion that it was the day he died.

Or it's the day he had to knock over a candle stick to escape the people trying to kill him.

Maybe one where he gets stolen and taken away from his sister.

Whatever it is, make sure to kiss his cheek and hush him.

Remind him that it was only a dream, and the dreams won't hurt him.

When Charlotte has a nightmare, the first thing she does is grab for her weapon before swinging at the nearest object.

So be sure to quickly move out of the way when that occurs.

She has nightmares about when her mother died.

Or the day she lost Victor.

Even ones where you get killed.

Once she realizes it's only a dream, she sit back down.

Lean her head on your lap like her mother did.

There was a song her mother used to sing to her when she was a small child.

Sometimes that always calmed her nerves.

Hum that little tune when petting her hair.

Make sure to kiss her cheek and let her know you love her.

Trapper

Evan is a very still sleeper.

He'll snore occasionally or move a bit.

But he's usually very still.

So when he's having a nightmare, it's going to be obvious.

He's going to thrash around, almost like he's fighting something off.

He also has a habit of grinding his teeth in these moments.

He'll grind them so hard that you can actually hear the sound of teeth against teeth.

Moments later, he'll sit right up, covered in a cold sweat.

If you ask him what happened, he'll deny everything.

"No. I wasn't having a nightmare. I'm not a child."

Eventually he'll get you out of bed and head outside.

"Just... Need some air."

He usually only wears boxers to bed, so make sure you bring a blanket with you when you go out to get him.

He's going to pretend to be annoyed when you follow him outside.

"Go back to bed. You'll catch a cold."

But he's actually grateful.

The fact that you care so much about him really makes him feel like he isn't alone anymore.

If you get him to talk, he'll tell you the truth.

"It was about when I killed my father. But this time I didn't finish the job, and he came after you. He hurt you."

Just let him hold you.

Sit on his lap while he watches the moon and pets your hair.

His breathing will grow less erratic and calmer.

You're going to fall asleep on him.

But that's okay.

He'll carry you to bed, tucking you in before crawling in next to you.

Shortly after, Evan will feel calm enough to go back to sleep.

Trickster

He's the type to talk in his sleep.

"I'm sorry. I'm sorry!"

And he will thrash like he's trying to get away from something.

"Yun-Jin I'm sorry. Please don't!"

He'll sit up with a dramatic gasp.

Then, Ji-Woon will pull you into the most protective hug.

"Thank God you're here. I was having this dream where Yun-Jin was trying to kill me and then-"

He's rambling on and on about this horrific dream.

And, to be honest, he's being really melodramatic.

But you can't change who he is.

The best thing you can do right now is get him some water.

Hum one of his more gentle songs.

Then shower him with praise.

'You're the greatest boyfriend ever.'

'I love you to the moon and back.'

He enjoys those lines.

Are they corny?

Yes. Very.

Do they work on him?

Also yes.

Let him rest his head in your chest tonight.

Hearing that you're alive and there is the best stress relief he could hope for.

[kitsu-katsu]

I'm gonna make this post as condenaed and abridged brainrot to explain why Victor Frankenstein is my boy from 200 yr old media prompted by a tag question from @samathekittycat in a post I reblogged because that highjacking would've been too much

So. Basically every adaptation ever is way off, Victor in the og novel is a guy from a rich family, yes, but one that has it's own fucked up occurrences that shape him even though he says his life is the peak of idyllic and that can lead to really good character analysis

He becomes an alchemy fanatic at 13, completely obsesses over it, even harder when his father claims the whole subject to be trash and he's in general somewhat fascinated by natural occurrences as well, so he gets it into his head that he wants to change the world by attaining the alchemist dream of basically defeating death, and this is all exacerbated when he's about to be sent away to study in Ingolstadt at 17 and just days before his mother dies of an illness his cousin-sister-future wife (it's complicated, it's a whole mess with hiw mother's involvement too) contracted first, so his trip is delayed a bit, but he never really processes his grief and is not that interested in actual science at first until a professor he meets there validates the alchemists ambition and he starts to hyperfixate on science so bad he's surpassed his professors in 2 years, and with all this baggage, at 19, he decides he's going to decode the secrets of death basically, because as he sees it at this point, if applied enough in the right direction with a scientific method any mediocre man could change society

So he builds his creatire after 2 years of isolating himself completely to do it, so he finishes it at like 21, and the thing is, the guy basically did all of this in a hyperfocused state he started at 19 and influenced by All That Baggage and grief he has Not Processed, so he wasn't really thinking about the consequences of anything. So his creature opens its eyes and suddenly the weight and terror of everything falls upon him along with a good mix of uncanny valley, and he just. Collapses. He sleeps a bit, his creature's still there, and he's so scared he runs away from his dorm room and by chance meets with his bff who was back in Geneva with the rest of his family he hasn't talked to in 2 whole years, his creature sneaks out while this is happening, and when going back, Victor is so mentally collapsed and strained and also scared he mighr be called crazy that he's just glad that the creature's gone and enters a fragile state where he's just completely physically sick and done for for a Big While, he can't take care of himself anymore and can't even look at anything relatingnto science anymore

When he's getting better, he has to go back to Geneva because his brother died. Whoah-oh, it was the Creature. He confronts it eventually and it asks for a bride and promises to go away with her, this is a Whole Conflict, because Victor can't reveal what he knows or he'll be labelled insane, he also doesn't wanna finish the bride because she'll also be her own person and what if she doesn't wanna run away with og Creature as his bride? While all of this is happening, one family servant is being accused of the murder and trialed, Victor is squealing in a corner

Basically, he's very autistic, he's seen a hysteric, his creation of the Creature can be analyzed from so many different angles, from teenage pregnancy and postpartum depression, trans experiences (both transmasc and transfemme! I've seen excellent analysis from both perspectives, though I have a personal bias towards the transmasc reading), the process of artist in general (like, that point when you start drawing something and you start zooming into every detail for hours and once you zoom out again you realize you don't like how it came out at all even though you put so much time into it), his illnesses and disabilities both mental and physical are really interestingly depicted as well, overall, he's a very meaty character who was FAR from making everything right, in fact, he did a lot wrong, but he's also a victim of his circumstances, a teen/young adult in the whole duration of the thing, and is suffering tons of pressure from everywhere while losing his purpose and selse of self to his opposition to his own creation. They are the definition of "they can make eachother worse" and Victor loses everything. He's a tragedy. A tragedy that a lot of people wanna ignore and just say he's plain evil because the Creature must be plain good and they feel smart if they say the typical "Small brain: Frankenstein was the monster vs Big brain: Frankenstein was the scientist, not the monster vs Galaxy brain: Frankenstein was the monster all along" and they completely skip out on all the depth this character has

I went super aurface level in a lot of parts here, but I hope it's somewhat understandable

I recommend reading the novel though! It's Good

[sabrinasfeather]

Me rn: Hun, I tried explaining in a respectful matter why you’re Gale takes are weird interpretations but even agreed with you at times. You’ve basically just said the same shit for 3 separate posts, all of which I counteracted. Lmao Gale is the entitled nice guy? I don’t think he was the one who ghosted Katniss and threw statues at her when she kissed someone else (But wait, remember who DID that 🤗) And I really don’t get why you’ve brought up the beach kiss? That doesn’t make any sense. You’re really skewing the narrative and hold Gale to far different standards to Peeta.

no I do not hold double standard because the difference is Peeta realizes he was wrong and apologizes and changes his behavior Gale doesn't. if Peeta continue to act the way Gale was I would not be on either team. also he didn't throw the statue because of the kiss he was mad because Katniss and Haymitch because they didn't tell him about Snow's visit and because of that innocent people got killed because he gave money to rue and Thresh family like seriously didn't you read the books.

(And as for your other ask, you brought up what Liam Hemsworth said? I love Liam but Idgaf what his take is on Katniss and Gale bc he and I can have different interpretations! I don’t agree or really care what he thinks of it lol. You clearly just want the last word, have at it. It’s weird as hell that Peeta manipulating Katniss into a relationship, stalking her, ghosting her, and making her extremely uncomfortable at times is sweet and romantic, yet Gale stopping Katniss from kissing him makes him the devil. Goodbye)

this is a quote from Peeta catching Fire( He takes a deep breath. "Look, Katniss, I've been wanting to talk to you about the way I acted on the train. I mean, the last train. The one that brought us home. I knew you had something with Gale. I was jealous of him before I even officially met you. And it wasn't fair to hold you to anything that happened in the Games. I'm sorry."

There's nothing for you to be sorry about. You were just keeping us alive. But I don't want us to go on like this, ignoring each other in real life and falling into the snow every time there's a camera around. So I thought if I stopped being so, you know, wounded, we could take a shot at just being friends," he says.) Peeta was also very upset about the engagement as well he didn't want to get married like that because he knew Katniss didn't want it and he respected her boundaries. he also got her a locket with gale inside it and was basically telling her I know you love him and I want you to create a life with him and I want you to be happy even if it's not with me. does that sound like he's being manipulative does that's sound like he's being a nice guy does that sound like he's trying to force a relationship on her. No so I have no clue how you got that idea but it really just goes to show you weren't really paying attention. but you know who was actually being pushy with a romantic relationship with Katniss Gale and here's proof.

("Tell me about it," I say. "If I could've just hated him in the arena, we all wouldn't be in this mess now. He'd be dead, and I'd be a happy little victor all by myself."

"And where would we be, Katniss?" asks Gale.)

and mind you this happened right after katniss told him she can't be even think about a relationship right now because she's scared of getting killed and her family getting killed and mind you this also happened right after the quarter quells was announced. so maybe it's Gale who's actually pushing for a relationship not Peeta. also Peeta wasn't stalking again I have no idea how you even got that seriously the boy just had a crush.

and as for the Liam Hemsworth thing the reason I even included because his interpretation is actually correct but you know what don't take my word for it take the words of the author Susan Collins herself.

(Suzanne Collins, who authored “The Hunger Games” series, seemed to echo Hemsworth’s sentiments. In an interview with The New York Times, she shared that Gale and Peeta function “less as two points on a love triangle, more as two perspectives in the just-war debate.” Collins continued on to share what the characters represent. “Gale, because of his experiences and temperament, tends toward violent remedies. Peeta’s natural inclination is toward diplomacy. Katniss isn’t just deciding on a partner; she’s figuring out her worldview.”) so I think you get my point and it's not that she's trying to say you shouldn't fight or anything but it's important to not cross that line in times of war and that's what Gale did and that's why they don't end up together. so I really think you should just go ahead reread the books because it's obvious you weren't paying attention .

Okay, you do realize throwing a statue at someone is pretty weird right? No offense but that is legit a warning sign for abusive behavior. Sure, Peeta apologizes, but A) He only did it when he was forced to interact with Katniss on the train. If he didn’t, he still would’ve been refusing to interact with her. B) Peeta does say this after finding about Katniss and Gale’s kiss.

“Was that the only time you kissed Gale”. After Katniss told Peeta she was personally threatened by Snow, Peeta’s biggest concern is that if she only kissed Gale one time. He also seemed pretty threatened about Gale in the 1st book, getting mad at Katniss when finding out Gale wasn’t related to her and he also gruffly says “She’s just worried about her boyfriend (Gale)” when talking about the love act.

Gale does try to help Peeta as well. Remember when he told Katniss he was still keeping her alive after the 1st interview? Or when he helped trained him for the games and told her he was pretty likable? And again, how he risked his life to save Peeta, played ‘real or not real’ to help with his hijacking, and he gave him the nightlock pill, which almost put Gale in the same fate as Peeta.

Also, the “Where would we be quote” again, doesn’t mean a romantic relationship, that is just interpretation. Considering that Gale doesn’t even talk about it afterwards, he likely was thinking about how Katniss wouldn’t have to be in the games again.

Also babes, Suzanne Collings legit blamed Gale for justifiable actions in a war (Taking over the Nut) and a decision that wasn’t his orders (The Capital Plaza) I’ve read these books numerous times, thank you very much. People are allowed to have opinions, if you can’t handle that maybe you should lock yourself in your room and cry about it. Or touch grass, or get a job, you clearly need it. Also, you harassing me with Peeta has genuinely only made me ship Everthorne more and hate Peeta more too 🫶

[bronze-bell]

Aesop didn't expect to hear such... joy from Victor as he delivered the letter, as he couldn't move. It was unfair, how even as he heard such wonderful things, he couldn't be there for them. He couldn't join. Even the wood of the door was... truthfully, Aesop saw that small distance as a blessing, keeping it from being so obvious just how little of his composure remained. How close it was to cracking, leaking the million suppressed emotions and bleeding him dry.

The sound of footsteps indicates a distance taken, only to return within moments. He really was trapped here, wasn't he? But... which of them was locked here? Would it be wrong to say both of them were reeling each other closer, terrified of letting go?

A letter slides through the mail slot, and Aesop struggles to catch it, to keep his hold. Victor definitely knows. Please let these words not be harsh, please let them be so kind as all the others.

Victor was placing so much trust in him. Was so willing to be near him, every part. He was willing even to call Aesop an angel. An incredulous laugh escaped. Did Victor know what he was saying? More human than himself. That... can't be right. Such paralysis only grew stronger, Aesop's breaths shaking as he continued.

The further he read, he could feel his knees growing unsteady as he realized just how Victor understood exactly what he meant, what he was... and how that didn't impact the postman's opinion of him in the slightest. Aesop truly didn't deserve someone so kind. Someone who would trust him in life and death. He should have forgotten what another person's warmth felt like, yet here he was, being showered in it. Wrapped within and reminded what it could be.

Click. Click. Aesop knew what that sound meant, and as he folded the letter back into its envelope, all he could do was lean, one hand placed on the door, and blink away the tears he could feel threatening him once again. Once he was sure he was at least... presentable (barring the red, swollen eyes he could not check), he slowly pushed the door open. He needed to be held right now, his frame shaking as his weight brought him collapsing into Victor's room.

Victor feels himself fueled with a similar aching in his heart as he waits to hear Aesop's reaction. The laugh, disbelieving but kind enough to indulge him all the same, makes him just a little anxious. Has he been too forward with this? Too clingy to the man who he'd never even brushed fingers with until last night?

He rushes to stand up as he hears Aesop's weight shift onto the door, and tries to look just a little presentable, before realising that there's still lettering supplies everywhere and he probably needs to move them. They are placed neatly on the desk as the door starts to open, and he suppresses the urge to run to it immediately, lest he startle the man away, instead keeping his pace at a more calm walk to hide his growing giddiness.

He helps to pull the door inside, and Aesop practically falls onto him as he stumbles in, barely balanced in a way Victor is sure he'll mirror soon, leaning on the wall as the door is shut and locked again. Victor approaches, shyly, cautiously, to wrap his hand gently around Aesop's and take him over to the bed, though it requires almost no effort as Aesop is all too easily pulled along, nearly collapsing as the two reach their destination.

Victor sits with him, closer than normal, and observes the way Aesop's ashy eyes drift to Victor's gold ones before snapping away, not wanting to scare him. In truth, he almost wants that gaze on him, wants to be captured in the attention of somebody with such sweet intentions for him, instead of one that he doesn't know the thoughts of. Or worse, someone he knows holds hate for him.

It's then he realises that Aesop has been crying. He's still crying now, actually, tears trailing down his face for a reason Victor doesn't quite understand. It makes Victor want to cry too, not understanding what he's done wrong but needing to make things right. With a shaky breath of courage, he turns to Aesop fully, and successfully catches his confused face in his scarred hands, wiping away tears with as delicate a hold as he can muster.

He moves closer, ever closer, until he can press into Aesop a little, wanting to have just a little of the touch for himself, so he doesn't feel as sad when he's inevitably pushed away. Aesop is looking at him now, but his look is one of confusion and what Victor worries is fear as he leans into it all.

Victor doesn't know what he'll do when Aesop comes to his senses and rejects it, but for a precious moment, the world is in his hands, and it's wonderful to pretend he could be loved in the same way.

[shelbgrey]

Glory of love(Eleazar Denali)

Chapter 8: The field trip

Warning: bride of Frankenstein spoilers!

Table of contents

“make sure your permission slips are turned into me or Mr. Denali before you get on the bus” I said as students passed by and handed in the proper slip of paper.

“here you go, miss. Swan” Tayna smiled and handed both her's and Edward's permission slips. “thank you Honey” I said taking them then walking towrds Eleazar.

“Hey, handsome” I smiled. He smiled warmly as he fixed the stack of paper he collected from the students. “Hola hermosa(hello beautiful), did you get them all?” he asked as I handed my half of the slips.

“yeah I got them all, we'll do a head count once everyone's on the bus” I said.

I looked around the parking lot, making sure everyone was here. My eyes stoped on Tayna as Tyler Crowley walked up to her, I couldn't help but tune in when her gold eyes widened.

“so I was wondering if you maybe want to go to prom?” he asked. I chuckled and turned towrds Eleazar. He heard it too and just shook his head in their direction. “she'd squash him like a bug” he said.

“umm... Actually me and my sister decided we were just gonna go together... I can't bale out on her” Tayna said. You could tell she wasn't actually lying, she did lie like Bella did to Mike Newton.

“oh, that's okay... Family comes first, right? ” he chuckled softly.

Before he was about to walk off but she stopped him and glanced at an annoyed Edward “you know what, I'd love to go with you” he smiled and walked off.

Me and Eleazar looked at each other shocked as the plot twist unfolded before us. After Tyler said his goodbye, Tayan walked up to us with a smirk on her face.

“I don't even want to know” I sighed. “everyone on the bus!” I yelled out getting my 1st and 3rd period classes attention.

~~~~~~~~(.......)~~~~~~~~

“She's alive, alive! The Bride of Frankenstein” the screen shouted. I smiled at the sliver screen when the birde showed her face for the first time. Dispite her being a creature she was truly beautiful.

I looked over to Eleazar as he stared intently at the screen. My heart fluttered when I thought back to our date the other night, but since there was a bunch of students around our touches were limited. That didn't stop me from moving just a little bit closer to him. His hand then fell to my thigh, gently squeezing it.

“this movie truly is depressing” Eleazar whispered in my ear. I shrugged knowing he was right. It was the scene in the movie where the bride becomes terrified of the monster and rejects him, most of the movie was about him not wanting to be alone. This movie humanizes the creature by giving him the need of wanting a friend.

The bride screamed in terror at the sight of the monster and Eleazar leaned in whispering in my ear. “that should have been your reaction” he joked.

I rolled my eyes. “I don't see you as a monster like the bride dose him” I said softly.

“well, I'm greatful for that” he smiled and kissed the side of my head quickly before anyone else could see.

“we belong dead!” the creature growled and the movie ended with him and his bride, along with her creater being blown up to smithereens. The movie ended and theater room lights came on.

“that's how it ends!?” Tyler said flabbergasted.

“you never seen this movie?” Angela Webber asked.

I chuckled as we all stood up. “that's a bunch of bullshit Miss. Swan” I nodded agreeing with him as Eleazar moved out of the way so I could exit the isle of chairs.

“Yes it is... We'll talk about it on the bus” I said.

“ridiculous” Tyler said shaking his head.

Like I promised there was a full discussion on the bus. There was many people confused or pissed about the ending but some had already knew the ending.

“but she was a creature too, so why was she scared of him?” Jessica Stanley asked.

“okay, the way I saw it was the story was trying to symbolize this social change. After the bride realized she has the same scars as the monster, she understands what Victor did to her... She wasn't gonna except”

“isn't that kinda selfish?” Edward asked suddenly. I looked up to where he was setting in the back alone. I gestured for him to continue. “Victor Frankenstein and Dr. Pretorius Damned them both, so why don't they just be together when they relize they're one in the same”

“maybe she was just scared” Tayna responded with her arms crossed. “... Or she's dumb”

“but he wasn't evli” Eric said. “when he befriends the blind guy he becomes more human after all the things he was taught”

I gestured towrds Eric. “this is why we saw this movie, it's gonna help you with your final project”

“that ending sucked though” Mike mumbled.

~~~~~~~~(.......)~~~~~~~~

“how long have you been a vampire Eli?” I asked as we layed in the hammock in my backyard. After school we went to my house where there was a bit more privacy.

“since the mid 1700s” he said.

“dose someone have to be dying to become like you?” I asked. Eleazar shook his head. “no, that's just how we prefer to do it... Carlisle's never turn someone if the had the choice”

“did he turn you?” I asked resting my head on his chest. “I don't remember who turned me... When you turn your human memories becoming foggy, so I never really found out who turned me”

“did it hurt?” I asked softly. I fiddled with one of the buttons on his black shirt.

“the venom was excruciating... But it takes a lot of restaint to turn someone beacuse when we tasted human blood a sort of frenzy starts to happen” he explained. It hurt thinking about all that pain he went through, I only hoped he wasn't alone when it happened.

“did carlisle introduce you to the whole animal blood diet?” I asked.

“no, actually I met Tayna, Kate, and Irina beofer carlisle. They had the same diet... I didn't want hurt anyone so I tried it once I left the vulturi and joined there Coven”

“who are the Vulturi?” I asked. “they're basically vampire royalty, I was part of the gaurd for centuries but then left when I met my first wife” he explained. “remember when I told you Carmen left me for someone I used to work with?”

I nodded looking up at him. “well he was part of the vulturi... The infuriating part is I left the vulturi for her and she ends up joing with her mistress”

“I'm sorry” I said reaching up playing with the ends of his hair at the neap of his neck. He smiled down at me. “nothing to be sorry for... I'm with you now and that's all that matters.”

The sun came out unexpectedly and peaked behind the tree the hammock was attached to. The sun hit Eleazar's face, making him shine like a diamond. I'd never seen anything so enchanting. I staired at him lovingly as I placed my hand on the side of his face.

“amazing” I whispered, stroking the side of his face with my thumb. He leaned down and our lips connected as the sun crawled back into it's cloudy cave.

We parted ways due to my need for oxygen. He placed his hand on my jaw and leaned back in, but pulled back when he heard the back door open.

“Hey, y/n-oops” Bella said suddenly stopping. I set up making the hammock rock a bit. “am I interrupting something?”

“si-”

“no!” I said cutting Eleazar off. “we were just talking, what's up?”

Bella sighed and slapped the side of her thigh. “my truck is acting up again... And we need to meet dad at the dinner”

I sighed and fell back into Eleazar's arms making the hammock almost tip. “I can drop you guys off” he said rubbing my back.

Bella nodded and went to the front of the house where Eleazar's car was parked. Eleazar was now known to drive fast, it didn't bother me until we made it to the diner a lot quicker than I wanted. He parked next my Dad's cruser and Bella got out.

“I'd offer you to join us but you don't eat” I smiled. Eleazar only shrugged and pressed a quick kiss on my lips. “see you at school tomorrow”

Eleazar shook his head sadly. “tomorrow is gonna be sunny, we can't go out” he grabed my hand and kissed it. “but all call you when you get off work”

“okay, bye Eli” I said leaving his car.

~~~~~~~~(Cullen residents, Eleazar's pov)~~~~~~~~

“you did what?!” Irina shouted. I rolled my eyes and walked into the living room.

“I thought you were smarter than this! This is could end so badly” she continued. I whipped around causing her to take a step back.

“I wasn't gonna lie to her, and it won't end badly” I confirmed.

The whole family heard the ruckus. What started out as a small conversation between me and the three blonds I call family turned into a screaming match. And once Irina knows, the whole house knows.

“Irina you knew this was coming” Carlisle said coming up behind me. “you two have been friends for centuries. Are you really gonna be mad at him for being happy?”

Irina sighed and gave me a apologetic look. “What if it puts her in danger... Or you?” she asked me. I crossed my arms and looked her in the eyes. “then I'll protect her”

She nodded, excepting that. Esme then came up behind me with her hand on my shoulder. “well, we can't wait to meet her... Why don't you bring her over tomorrow after work”

I sighed, I could only imagine how they'll act when I bring her home. I loved my family, but there was always something happing. Rather it be a prank or Rosalie and Edward trying to kill each other. But I couldn't say no to Esme and y/n was special enough to were I want my family to get to know her like I have.

“okay, I'll ask her” I smiled softly at Esme. “great” she smiled and left to finish up somethings around the house.

“I'm happy for you El” Carlisle smiled and padded my back.

[froguemorgue]

you know, i need someone to tell this to, and unfortunately for you, you have been randomly selected as that person.

Alexander Hamilton's biracial cousin once removed aka Peter Lytton's son was called Don Alvarez de Velasco (you prolly know that) now as non-spanish speaker what i didn't realize was that his ma had essentially named him Lord de Velasco. and by GOD do i need the story behind it. is it like when black men would be named Mister so that their white peers couldn't sidestep the honorific? was there something else at play? Did they live a good life after Peter Lytton's death? mulattos could at the very least reach the upper rungs of society in the Carribean and being a Lytton has to count for /something/ so did Alvarez ever "rise" in Crucian society in so much as he could? Did his mother call him Don or Alvarez?

ofc, im not asking you this directly. but its just. he's been reduced to alexander hamilton's cousin's bastard biracial son and drops off mention in any text i could find. granted I'm also driving my chariot through that road because i don't know another road. the only other mention i came across was a historical society in st croix hosting a lecture titled with his name and was about the lives of mulattos i think, i believe. i was desperate for some info on this figure that i even wrote a mail to the society that was prolly promptly deleted as spam because of how stupidly it was written

who was he, yknw? i wonder if we'll ever know

did you ever have a figure like this? atp I'm just yappin lmao sorry for the long ask!

HOW DID I MISS THIS? i still love you, sorry, was not ignoring you!!

When you ask about whether I have historical figures like this I wonder about, YES! and they're almost always women or non-white people. We know their names (if that) and their general relation to the White Dudes history focuses on. It isn't often we know much else, even with some deep dives into any primary documents and context that would clue us into the rest. Wish they'd all just keep diaries, hahhaha. Of course that wasn't always possible and so many people, if they were even literate or had the means to keep diaries, wouldn't even write about themselves in complete honesty. History loves writers because their poetry, fiction, diaries, pamphlets, and letters give us more to learn about. Again, it was such a privilege to be a writer at all, and people marginalized by history and modernity are disproportionately affected by systemic erasure of their existence. History is told by the victors, or whatever they say.

I'd say I wonder about most historical figures, but somebody like Hamilton's cousin is up there for sure. His mother has always piqued my curiosity because obviously her ex husband Lavien was a major POS but history remembers HER exactly how he wanted her to be remembered: a whore. It pisses me off when biographers (r-r-r-ron) reduce her to that, and as a result, LMM's impression of her in the musical was much of the same and it's TRAGIC UGHHHH. It's actually so disgustinf that I start to foam at the mouth because what a fucking injustice.

After your message to my inbox and during my subsequent response, I actually started to go on a rabbit hole reading AGAIN about Alexander's childhood because the number of times he moved, the adults involved in his life, and how he was treated because of his illegitimacy makes it hard to remember exactly what went down. Now added to the list: Hamilton's cousin once removed who happened to be mixed. And though I will not reduce Alvarez to a prop on his own, how interesting to better understand Lytton, right? Of course every person's existence contextualizes other people, but with that said, understanding Don Alvarez as his own person is much more interesting. I'm happy knowing as the years go on, more and more colleges and historical societies are funding and publishing research for biracial, Black and Indigenous people in history, as it seems the Liberal Arts College of the Virgin Islands has done. And yet... the lack of readable information about Don Alvarez online is so, so disheartening.

If you can't contact the historian and speaker for that talk on Crucian Lifestyles, your only recourse is to go out there and dig through mountains of archives until you can find it out yourself. curiosity is so draining

[oh-three]

Loki S2E4:

Oooh, maybe Victor Timely is the guy who pruned Loki in episode one. Or, maybe it was his episode four self. Either way, something tells me we're about to find out.

Whoa, Miss Minutes keeps surprising me.

Also. More of Hunter Renslayer, ooh.

"See you soon" is literally this man's catchphrase.

WHOA, THAT'S A BETRAYAL. Not that I didn't expect it, but wow. Gotta say, Miss Minutes is right, though. Clearly, he didn't really do much.

Alright, let's see what Victor's gonna fuck up.

Who left this man alone after he went through the TimeDoor??

Okay, can't blame him for the crisis though. Not after last episode.

"Your words changed me" is the single most powerful phrase ever. I don't even remember this lady's name, but I like her.

O.B. and Victor complimenting each other and O.B. slowly realizing who he's talking to is the funniest thing ever. He's fanboying over him the way Casey was fanboying over him.

Also, the fact that Sylvie stuck around is pretty neat.

MOBIUS 😂

My man really does not want to go out in the suit again, and Loki's his scapegoat. They are such a married couple.

SYLVIE, STOP ADDING FUEL TO HIS REPRESSED EMOTIONS. LEAVE HIM ALONE.

Brad, what the fuck.

Hah, get called out. You're out of friends.

D-90 and B-15 just stepped into the wolves' den 👀

Not Brad grabbing his collar the same way he grabbed the straps of his uniform in episode one.

Lmao, D-90 getting told to go help Mobius- and just Mobius- watch Victor. Alone time with him oughta be awkward.

Loki defending Mobius 😭❤

"What if you are wrong to believe that this place can be any better? What if I was wrong to spare him? It would be easier to burn this place down and start from scratch." Yes, but as Loki tried to tell you, it's harder to take the difficult path- and, oftentimes, the difficult path is the right one. Nothing that's right is ever easy.

^^^^ "Trying to fix what's broken is hard."

Ahhh, I see you coming around.

Sylvie does have a point, though- it'll be dangerous letting Timely go after this.

"We are gods." drops mic

Wait, you guys didn't try the pie.

Dammit, Renslayer.

OH NO. SHE'S GOING TO KILL THEM ALL.

HOLY SHIT.

That was so horrifying wtf.

At least Brad seems to be having regrets already.

Whatever you do, DON'T LOSE HIM, D-90.

Just. This scene with D-90 and Victor. It's funny and sweet, and I love it-

WAIT, NO. BRAD, WHY.

COME BACK, D.

There's something very significant about D-90 getting pruned exactly one season after pruning Mobius, and I don't know how I feel about it.

Everything is going wrong.

And now they're gonna think Timely kill D-90. Nice.

Well, at least B-15's smart enough to know it was Renslayer.

I can't decide if Victor's a great actor or a terrible one. 😂

"There's still time." Hello, past Loki, you have no idea what our poor present folks are going through right now.

I still want to know why that phone's ringing.

Ah, so Loki literally did prune himself. This moment is like watching Harry save himself in Prisoner of Azkaban.

The look on Sylvie's face Lmao 🤣

ANSWER THE PHONE.

Bet it's Renslayer. Oh. Nvm.

CASEY, WHAT ARE YOU DOING.

Miss Minutes glitching into oblivion is the most satisfying thing ever.

Okay, now that Brad's exposed, someone please prune him. He's expendable.

Oooh, the systems being offline means that magic works in the TVA. 👀

THEY ENCHANTED HIM. 😂

RAVONNA'S BEEN PRUNED.

IT ACTUALLY WORKED, AYYYY.

Okay, is Victor doing this out of the goodness of his heart or does he actually have some sinister plot? Is he about to die?

THIS IS THE SAME MUSIC THAT PLAYED BEFORE THEY FOUGHT ALIOTH LAST SEASON.

I am having a fucking blast with this.

WHOA.

FUCKING RIP.

THAT IS NOT WHAT I WAS EXPECTING.

Thank god it wasn't Mobius or Loki.

SHIT, IT EXPODED.

AND THERE'S THE MUSIC THAT PLAYED AFTER MOBIUS GOT PRUNED.

I HATE CLIFFHANGERS. 😭

[darkfictionjude]

Etymology nonnie here! 

There is so much to talk about. I used the update as a chance to play everything again from the beginning. So I have a lot to say (apologies to you, and your eyes, as I'm not sure if you have fully recovered, and yet here I am writing long ramblings). 

1) This is basically about what I became known for. Names. I became the etymology nonnie after writing about the origins of the names of the Crown siblings as I was trying to come up with a name for my MC that was the right fit. 

Well, I also did an ask a time later rambling how, while I like the name Indiana, I thought it became a bit of a meme, when placed along Cairo Crown. After all, it's almost as if Victor and Prudence went and said: “This kid is meant to be an archeologist, hence the name”. And I would have left it at that, if it wasn't because the name began to call me more as time went. As well as the idea of having the name of Imre's idol felt exciting and interesting. 

So, I ended up having my MC being Indiana, or Indy. Me, who found the name funny initially, ended up falling in love with it and now I cannot name my MC anything else. 

It doesn't help that it means now both my MC and Imre have the same initial. So, if my MC was a cheesy (and way to wholesome given what we know) boy, I could see him drawing a heart with I+I inside. Worse, it doesn't stop there. It can be ever cheesier: I+I=We. 

I just know Imre would be amused by it. I'm not sure if he would find it cute, silly, both or neither. But I know he would be amused for certain.

Speaking of my beloved. I did enjoy reading how he reacts to MC when we are romancing him. How he seems perplexed by what he is feeling, and yet actively used his charm and seduction to bring MC to his side. And I love how my MC is “I cannot trust him, I know it. And yet, I keep bringing myself to trying to”. 

The whole phone call, if it wasn't for the murder of Sammy, was also delighful in this regard. The back and forth. MC being awkward because he praised Imre's voice in a way that makes obvious he is enamored. Imre using the chance to flirt, to praise MC… As if I needed even more reasons to romance Imre. 

2) I replayed the first side quests to see which one is more urgent for me. After all, I may like my MC to be a good Samaritan, but I prefer to focus on what will help someone the most. 

Because of that, I tried to play the taxidermy side quest and the siren side quest. And, while I spent more time on the latter (and liked it a lot). The cheese rat side quest seems significantly greater of a problem to be solved. As is actually dangerous to Mr. Ewekes (I hope I got his name right). But it could become a danger to the town as whole, if left unsupervised.

That said, I love the lake side quest too. Had this been an RPG, of which I'm rather fond to, I would probably played them all. Yet, because you structured the side quests in a way that only one can be played, I had to choose the cheese rat ones. It's the biggest problem overall. Also, I do love the social classes commentary of the cheese rat quest. 

3) Speaking of which, this brings me to the Crown family and their money troubles. I realized Sally said Victor and Prudence wanted MC back. Yet, for the life of me, I cannot see a reason why they would want MC back. Then, it struck me. It's money. They probably don't have enough money to keep MC there, or they don't consider it a priority. 

Is that, or Sally is very sus. I do still suspect (although I think I'm wrong), that Victor may be dead and Sally is covering it. And the fact Sally is almost desperate when he says Prudence wanted MC back (in that scene from the previous update), when she never seemed that affectionate towards MC (if anything, Prudence seemed entirely checked off from MC) and now is way too apathetic to actually demand something as important as getting MC back home. Well… Maybe Sally is not in the best place mentally. And not just in the traumatized parentified mess we have previously discussed, but also in as something more serious. Could be Sally making this whole thing up? 

Speaking of messed up relationships. I don't think I explored everything about the emotional mess Percy is in. While it is clear he is in complete denial about Prudence affection for him and her favoritism for Orla (which may be a coping mechanism). It's how Sally treats him that probably has a stronger effect on him. 

For instance, Sally, by virtue of being parentified, does have a parental role. For MC this is obvious and clear, as there is also an infantilization of MC following Sally's parentification (which is shown wonderfully by how Sally seem surprised MC went through puberty, like, why were you expecting MC to remain a kid forever?). But in the case of Percy, he still has to more or less answer to Sally. If MC is the kid, Percy is the rebellious teenager. The problem comes, however, from the fact that Sally has decided to ignore Percy for MC in a blatant and undeniable manner. Inside the home, is not MC who is the black sheep. But Percy. Since only the brothers and MC are the ones who are effectively living and interacting together. 

So now I'm not surprised at all that Percy would trade places with MC. MC was gone for two years, has done nothing to warrant the level of affection Sally shows. And yet, he is still preferred over Percy. Sally, even if way too overprotective and condescending, is so incredibly caring to MC. While Percy is only criticized and ignored by him. 

Of course, Sally does not have a responsabilty to be Percy's parent. Arguably, none of them want that. But because of the parentification, Sally doesn't seem to know how to he a sibling. And has only widened the distance between him and Percy. It's heartbreaking, really. 

And from the flashbacks we have had… I think Percy was in a better position than currently, yet it was obvious he still was paid less attention than the rest. Sally is the heir, Orla was the only/eldest daughter, and MC was the baby. Percy was, at most, the spare.

I+I=We 😭😭😭😭 a good pun crime. I do like how you used Indiana for a male mc I feel that even though most use it for girls it serves very well in a unisex capacity like the name Ashley

Also yeah I try not to have a favourite in side quests but Mr. Ewekes has to be the most entertaining for me since it's not only funny but the choices are extreme to how to deal with it

Very interesting what you say about why MC was brought back... is Sally telling the truth?

I think how you explained it, MC is the baby and Percy is the rebellious teenager lashing out to be paid attention to and envious that MC does nothing is achieves more

[non-cannon]

A while back I made a Fabina post where I mentioned off hand that I felt that all of the original British members of Sibuna were changed (for the better) for knowing Nina/being in Sibuna, but that I would be saving that for a later post. And well, the more I thought about it, the more I realized that everything I wanted to say about Fabian was covered in that post (TLDR he became braver and gained some much needed self confidence). I also realized that I only have a little to say about Patricia and Alfie, and more to say about Amber. So this post will be briefly covering Patricia and Alfie before I go off about Amber.

Also I remembered that my original thesis was not that this characters (Fabian, Amber, Patrica, Alfie) changed per say, but that they start the first season being presented as very common stereotypes, and then as the season goes on they prove to be so much more than those stereotypes/subverting those stereotypes/tropes.

Patricia:

In my opinion Patricia's main character arc happens in season two and three and it involves Eddie. What happens in season one as she interacts with Nina and joins Sibuna is that she goes from being seen by us the audience from being the stereotypical mean girl to being an incredibly loyal friend.

Alfie:

He starts season one off as the comic relief character, and Jerome's partner in crime. When he accidentally gets involved in Sibuna, it's his chance to become more than that, and he takes it. And even before then he has the very real and heart warming conversation with Patricia about dealing with trauma.

Sibuna (and Nina because without her there would be no Sibuna), gives him something serious to do. Something more than being a punchline, something more than being Jerome's lap dog. And he leaps at it. He tries so hard to be worthy of the trust and respect that Sibuna (mainly Amber) gives him, and he hurts so much when Jerome emotionally blackmails him into failing. And I just, season one Alfie gives me the feels, you know?

Amber:

Amber starts season one being the stereotypical dumb blond popular girl in the power couple with the jock. And I think she starts the show thinking that that is all she is, and all that she can be. And her arc with Nina and Sibuna across seasons one and two is her learning that she is so much more than that. That she is allowed to be more than that. And as much as I hated her leaving in season three, I think her chasing her dreams and going to fashion school may just be the culmination of her finally realizing that she can do what she wants, and he actually knowing what that is (also she was forced out by Victor and co, but shush).

You would expect someone like Amber to be mean, and for like 5 seconds in the first episode, when she says that Nina is in her seat, she almost is. But Amber is one of the kindest people ever (not counting the way she treated Alfie in season two). And there are so many times in season one that she could have been justifiably mean and vindictive when Mara stole Mick from her, and for the most part she wasn't. The closest she really got was running against Mara for class president, and when she had the opportunity to win when Mara thought it had been rigged in her favor, Amber did not hesitate to do the right thing when learning the vote hadn't been rigged. Also by the end of the season Amber is full on supporting Mick and Mara's relationship.

I think a lot of Amber being dumb is her thinking she is. When Nina called her a genius for coming up with the name Sibuna, with the way Amber reacts, I think that may well have been the first time anyone had ever told Amber that she wasn't stupid. Amber acts less stupid over the course of the show. And I think it's not just a case of her being smarter than anyone else gave her credit for, but also a case of her being smarter than she gave herself credit for. And that moment, and Nina, and Sibuna in general helped her realize that she isn't stupid.

Amber isn't stupid. She knows when to keep a secret when it matters. She has a high emotional intelligence, she's (for the most part), really good at figuring out people's relationships and what not. She comes up with the idea to record Sara's diary. She figures out the solution to a number of clues. She's the one who figures out how to get Trudy back. She's really good at fashion. And while she's not a straight A student, the school (according to the trailer) is Britain's premier boarding school, and at no point is it indicated that she's in danger of failing anything.

Amber is smart, but when the show starts, she thinks she is, and that she's supposed to be, but thanks to Nina and Sibuna, she learns that she isn't and that she doesn't have to be.

[jennawynn]

Chronotrek TOS to series finale

oops, I did it again... I forgot to update. got lost in the sauce. or something.

Honestly, I thought I had been updating at least once a season, but I guess not. Also got distracted binging the entire series of The Expanse in about a week over the holidays. BUT I just finished the Original Series. So I guess we'll go broad strokes since the play by play is pointless.

TLDR: How fucking disappointing an end.

Season 2-

Unlike much of TOS to new!Trek, T'Pring is spot on for appearance. Not that I think it's important or even a _good_ thing for most of them to be beholden to the original, but I was impressed by that. Though the whole 'property of the victor' thing is very squicky. I thought the Vulcans were 'evolved'. And then I guess he didn't gotta fuck after all.

By 2, Uhura's actually doing work. She's not just eye candy on the bridge. But then they have Jim say that finding a girl on the ship is losing an officer. Because women can't fucking exist without being partnered and can't be partnered and still work. This bullshit was actually still happening in the Navy when I was in. Men were unwilling to invest time and training in women because we'd just get married and get out to have babies anyway where a man is likely to stay in and retire. The men in my class in boot camp were told by their instructors that women join to find men, not because we actually wanted to serve or excel.

8- (Jim across the intercom) Scotty! Scotty! Stop getting your ass kicked and respond so I can tell you there's an intruder in your area! Scotty! Scotty, respond!

I hate this so much. Like when Jim and Uhura were in cells and the dude was obviously assaulting her and Jim kept shouting 'what's happening? are you ok? what's happening? what are you doing? are you ok?' like Jim, ffs, use some context clues, some deductive reasoning, and stop shouting for people to acknowledge you and DO SOMETHING.

Rainn Wilson was a good choice for Mudd in New!Trek though.

Why would they have to pay royalties? I thought this was post-currency? Post-scarcity? Is there still money?

9- This one was also squicky. So obsessed with gender. Body takeover, "love" that isn't recognized as such until it's wearing a pretty face. But of course one is a man and one is perceived as a woman so therefore let's change everything we thought so we can stay together and call it love.

10- Amanda's a pretty good reconstruction too, if aged down in New!Trek.

14- I wasn't expecting them to go the "Jack the Ripper is an immortal alien" route.

It always cracks me up when they cut to a super wide angle shot of a fight to sub in stunt doubles who are really obvious, though I suppose they wouldn't have been on a 60s tv.

19 Heeeey Dr. M'Benga!

This whole thing with the exotic witch women and how sexual she is and how she's dressed. Like that's not dumb enough, she lets herself get grappled more than once posturing with the phaser but defaulting to the dagger. Shoot one and they'd fall in line! But gotta keep reinforcing the idea that men are stronger than women.

21- Jim's look of indignation at Spock's statement that he would fit right in as a Nazi lmao

22- I don't know why I never realized that Trek is all (at least so far) in the Milky Way, that they don't even get as far as Andromeda.

26- so they can just. time travel. at will. what?

Season 3

3- hold up, roll that back. there's an ancient pregenitor superrace that seeded humanoids everywhere? This is the first I recall it being mentioned in Trek (though the trope or a version of it is also in the expanse, mass effect, etc.) "Preservers". Is it ever explored more? It's a surprise to Bones and maybe Spock too- certainly not common knowledge.

This is from before 3, but I really like the way Bones and Spock have this begrudgingly respectful relationship, like brothers. They tease and pick at each other, but have each others' backs against anything (besides Jim maybe)

4- Kirk can see the kid doing the thing. Fuckin' ground him.

Spock says fuck them kids.

Ugly = Bad was alive and well in the 60s.

5- And then they somehow have a discussion that Good =/= Beautiful in the very next episode.

Gen Obs- It feels like TOS spends more time on the bridge than other shows. The Bridge or the planet they're on. The other shows so far show more engine room, hallways, ready rooms, bunks, etc. Other places on the ship than just the bridge. They have them in TOS, but they seem underutilized. I don't have the data to back it up and couldn't find it (which was surprising to me).

Another obs- they overcommunicate for the audience's sake, but rarely with each other. Kirk never explains his thought process or orders to the people he leaves in command. When something planetside affects the ship, he doesn't tell them, he just says 'I'll take care of it down here'. His crew and his backup are often left in the dark.

13- There's so much in this one I don't like but the line about Kirk being into spanking made me smirk. Canonically in love with the Enterprise indeed.

14- Jim: Mr. Spock and I are brothers! Spock: Captain Kirk is speaking figuratively and with undue emotion Kirk: *offended face* Spock: However, what he says is logical and I do agree with it.

19 Kirk did seem to become more of a manwhore the longer the season went, no? Why did they all lose their shit so much around women? It's exhausting.

22- I love that Scotty gets to wear tartan/kilt in dress uniform.

heeeyyyy Kahless

24- And the disappointing end. In this idolized utopian setting, not only is it not permitted for a woman to be a starship captain, but then they "prove" that women are too emotional to command.

The last line of the whole series: "Her life could have been as rich as any woman's if only...."

Not as rich as any person's. And if only she'd been content to her 2nd class status and not pushed for equality. How fucking disappointing.

Everyone always points to 'the actresses WANTED to wear miniskirts because empowerment' when they talk about the sexism of the original series, and I tried to watch with that in mind, but that just feels like a smoke screen for the actual shitty sexist takes.

The show equates a woman with emotion and sexuality. She's a good officer right up until she falls in love (or someone falls in love with her), then she's just a woman- a liability and a pleasure object. They only use women in episodes that require someone to be or fall in love with them. Even Uhura and Chapel aren't completely immune, though they are the biggest exceptions and the only recurring female characters. Though of course Uhura's the comms officer (cause women talk) and Chapel's a nurse (not a doctor).

Like even if you remove the miniskirts and the gross inappropriate touching from the equation, there's still a lot of ick happening. They can imagine a future where the races are equal but not the sexes.

[troublewithvampires]

salvatore siblings mega post.

just realized i've never made a post talking about sal's siblings? wack.

anyway, i don't have drawn visual references for sal's siblings, but i do have like. approximations. these aren't completely accurate but they're definitely close. (picrew link)

sal has three siblings, of which he's the youngest: jesse burke, beth armstrong (formerly burke), and martin burke. in modern day, beth and martin are still alive, but jesse died in the late 1990s.

more info and approximate faceclaims and picrews under the cut! this is really fucking long, though, so no one is obligated to read all of this. it got out of hand very fast.

short summaries:

jesse was a stockbroker who was involved in a lot of white collar crime and helped establish some of sal's mob connections. he and sal were closer than the other siblings, who were pretty distant. after sal went missing, jesse investigated himself and found out he was murdered--shortly after, victor had him... eliminated.

beth is retired now, married to her long-time best friend and mother to three children, who each are adults now with their own children. she became a mother younger than she was ready to handle, but she was determined to do right by her daughter and make a good life for herself.

martin is an army veteran, having fought and lost a leg in the vietnam war. in modern day, martin is happy with his long-time romantic partner, a man named carson, and their six dogs. after sal disappeared, martin and beth became close again, talking after years of bitterness.

content warnings: non-graphic talk of drug abuse/overdoses, suicide, terminal illness, transphobia, and abuse.

jesse burke - 1934-1999 (died age 65)

(approximate faceclaim: eric stoltz) (age in picrew: 35)

jesse was very close with beth and martin when he was younger, but after their father's death he began emotionally drifting apart from the family. he never had much of a chance to bond with baby salvatore, but he did what he could to help out around the house.

from the age of 16, he was basically the man of the house, despite being only a teenager at the time.

still, the moment he could, he left home to attend university (studying finance and business), and he found it was a breath of fresh air. he had a lot more to worry about with his studies, but he felt like he could breathe for perhaps the first time. so while he stayed in touch with his siblings, he rarely, if ever, came home after he left to go to school.

very book-smart and charismatic, very good at finding the right people to be friends with and making sure to leave an impression on them. though he was very intelligent and a hard worker, his greatest skill was identifying the right people to mingle with and making the right impressions on them. truly a king of networking.

this charisma helped get him in the door with the right people to get his foot in the door in wall street, and by the 1970s he was working with a prestigious stockbroking firm. jesse got to live his best 'wolf of wall street' life, without a care in the world.

as an adult, he actually was on pretty decent terms with salvatore, unlike his siblings. sure, they rarely talked, but he really respected what sal was doing. it wasn't legal, sure, but they were both making names for themselves away from their family. they were both businessmen, and jesse thought that was all that mattered.

jesse also was pretty accepting of sal being a man. he didn't *get* it, sure, but he saw no reason to question it and never made a big deal about it one way or the other. his little sister was actually his little brother? oh, cool. well at least he's making something of himself, unlike the other two.

he was so impressed with sal, in fact, that he helped sal with networking. jesse is the one who introduced salvatore to mario gianette, aka nickels. he was the *in* sal needed to finally start working with the boss he worked with until he died.

in the mid 70s, sal completely cut ties with their mother and other siblings. jesse reached out to him after this, and the two had a drink together. they didn't talk much, but they enjoyed each other's company.

in the early 80s, sal introduced jesse to his closest associate, victor bonicelli. jesse and victor got along very well and started working very closely together. sure, jesse wasn't directly involved with any of the *super* illegal shit (in his words), but he helped keep the operation running financially.

when sal disappeared in the mid-80s, jesse was devastated--much more than he was when his mom passed the year before. he had a very public breakdown and was strongly urged by his bosses to take a break from work. for the first few months, he tried to use his money and influence to *find* sal, to no avail.

in the meantime, he ended up leaning a lot on victor. sal was victor's best friend, right? so they could grieve together.

a few years later, jesse discovered that victor was behind salvatore's disappearance. before he could do anything with this information, though, victor had him taken care of.

in the late 80s, jesse's firm was the subject of numerous criminal investigations into his mob connections. before he knew it, all of his business partners were turning against him to save their skin, and he became the scapegoat for all of the debauchery he and his associates had been up to for years.

jesse was arrested and spent ten years in jail, losing basically everything he had in the process. during this time, he wrote dozens of letters to salvatore--he knew sal would never read them, but the guilt for working with his brother's killer was eating him alive and he had to atone *somehow.*

when jesse was released in 1999 on parole, he just kinda... fell off the map. about a month later, he was found dead in a hotel room after an overdose.

beth armstrong - 1938-present (still alive)

(approximate faceclaim: jane seymour) (age in picrew: 32)

beth is the middle child, and she certainly acts the part. with an inferiority complex a mile wide, she's always been keenly aware of the fact that she's not as impressive as her siblings in many ways. she's not as nice as martin, not as smart as jesse, not as hard-working as salvatore. she was just beth.

beth has never been very family-oriented, but as the siblings' mother had to spend more and more time away from home to earn the money to care for them, she was often stuck caring for her younger siblings.

she began to resent this as she got older. she'd always been outspoken and fiery (how else would anyone pay attention to her, after all?), but she became doubly so during her teen years and into her early 20s. she threw herself headlong into activism, right around the beginning of second-wave feminism and the flower power movement.

beth still lived at home in this time, helping take care of her younger brothers and the house when she could, at least up until she was 23 and their uncle clarence took sal away and enlisted him to work with his mob buddies. at the time, beth was fucking pissed at her mom for allowing it, which led to them having an explosive argument one night.

beth said some things she regrets, calling her mom an irresponsible cunt who never should've been a mom, and anna fired right back--she told beth to her face that she didn't know the first thing about motherhood, so she had no room to talk. she was *nothing* and would always *be* nothing to the people around her unless she got her shit together and stopped being such a self-righteous little bitch. after that, they nearly stopped speaking altogether.

about a week later, beth left home, moving out to live with a friend for a few months before getting an apartment by herself. she was determined never to go back.

for a few years, beth took a few odd jobs to get by, never really settling into one career. she tried to keep in touch with her siblings, but jesse was an asshole and martin seemed to be turning the same way. as for sal... beth never really understood him, and she was fine with that. she never approved of the shit he was involved with, but she knew he didn't have a choice. i think beth pitied him, but there was a part of her that was bitter. sal was at least *something.*

(and in regards to sal being trans... beth never knew about that, really, and as far as she knew, he was a cis woman forced to dress as a man to make money for their selfish irresponsible mom.)

then, when beth was 26, she had a drunken one-night stand with a man named robert, which resulted in her getting pregnant. robert gave her no way to contact him, and she couldn't find him in the end to tell him about his baby.

she didn't know what to do, and for a time she spiraled, terrified of what the future held. she couldn't have this baby! she couldn't be a mother. she didn't want to be a mother. but it seemed she didn't have much of a choice--abortion wasn't legal at this point, and beth couldn't in good conscience put the baby up for adoption.

eventually, she moved back in with her mom--anna seemed eager to meet her grandchild, enough so to forget about the previous animosity. by this point, sal had moved out entirely, but beth didn't pay much mind to that. she figured he was fine, happy somewhere with their uncle. aside from the money he sent each month to support her and their mom, she didn't care at all.

before she knew it, beth was back where she was before, living with a mother she constantly butted heads with. however, this time around, her priorities were different--she had her own kid to think about. beth was determined to be a better mother than anna, no matter what.

her daugher, allison, was born in early 1965, a tiny girl who screamed and wailed from the moment she was born. and beth... was apprehensive, but she loved this baby. and as she held her newborn, beth promised her in a quiet voice that she'd give her a good life. allison would never grow up feeling unimportant--beth would make sure of it.

in the years that followed, beth began throwing herself headlong into being a family woman. the same passion she once threw into activism was now dedicated to making sure this was a healthy, stable household for her daughter. she didn't always succeed, though, and in her desperation to make things be okay, she drove the family apart. martin moved back in for a short time, and he grew angry and bitter at her constant fretting that they needed to be a family and she needed to take care of them. she couldn't understand why he wouldn't cooperate with her, and he couldn't understand why she cared so much.

when her mom got sick, beth became even more entrenched in being a caretaker for those around her. she and her mom never got along, sure but the idea of living in a world without her made beth's head swim. she was constantly stressed trying to keep things together, but still, they fell apart.

in the mid 70s, beth ended up in a screaming argument with salvatore about this very issue. she thought he was being selfish for not wanting to come home and see their mom before she died, even though beth had once been the same way. by the end of the conversation, beth was in tears, and she told sal to go fuck himself. he told her to do the same. and they never spoke again.

beth kept living with her mother up until 1977, when allison was 12. that year, anna passed away. about a year before that, beth met a man named joey at her job as a waitress, and they'd hit it off right away. he was the new cook, and he was the first person in a long time to treat beth like she really mattered. they were fast friends, and they had a close bond. thicker than thieves in every sense of the word.

so, when beth came to joey in tears after her mother finally passed, joey had no problem moving beth and allison and into his place right away. not as a romantic thing, but to make sure his friend and her daughter would be okay. they had nowhere else to go, after all, and he had the space and money to be able to help them out.

beth, joey, and allison settled into their new life together gradually, soon becoming a close little family unit. joey and beth's relationship remained platonic for years, but they co-parented allison very well. for all intents and purposes, they were her parents.

to make things easier, eventually joey and beth decided to get married. not out of any romantic interest in each other, but just to make sure they could take care of allison and be there for each other. while living with joey, beth was allowed to really be herself, not forced to take care of everything and keep a splintering family together against all odds. it was... freeing. beth had two more children with joey (a boy named scott in 1979 and a girl named rebecca in 1982), though no romance blossomed between them still. they were happy to coparent as friends, with no spark of anything between them.

so freeing, in fact, that beth decided to leave the past behind. she wasn't interested in the sinking ship that was her old family--she had a new family, after all. one that loved and appreciated her.

still, she wanted to do right by her siblings, so she did keep in touch with them, to some degree. she never spoke to salvatore again, but she did send him one last letter that their mother had written him, as an attempt to offer some kind of closure. she never heard back, but she didn't think much of that.

... until sal went missing one year later. beth was shocked when she heard the news, and she spent the evening bawling into joey's chest. though she hadn't spoken to sal in years and had written off her old family for the most part, she couldn't help but wonder what could've been... sure, salvatore was an asshole, but still! it put something into perspective for beth: even if her old family was shit, they were still family, and she didn't want to lose them.

in the aftermath of salvatore's disappearance, beth reached out to martin, and the two started talking. they caught up, and over time they began to mend their damaged relationship. it wasn't perfect, especially because jesse never returned any calls from either of them, but it was real. the road was rocky, but it was there. for the first time in decades, beth's family began putting itself back together.

in modern day, beth is still married to joey, has retired from a fulfilling career as the manager of a grocery store, and her three children are now all adults with their own children. she is loved, and she is happy. she's had a lot of hardships in her life, but she's satisfied with where she is now.

martin burke - 1944-present (still alive)

(approximate faceclaim: paul blackthorne) (age in picrew: 33)

the youngest of the burke siblings, and the one who was hit hardest by their father's disappearance. martin always idolized their dad, and he never had much time to process that grief.

as a child, martin was always very kind and pacifistic, but both of those qualities certainly became less prominent with time. the older martin got, the angrier and angrier he became, and by the time he was an adult, he was *deeply* cynical and bitter towards those around him.

almost the moment he turned 18, martin left home to join the military. he grew up on stories about his cousin, scott, who was (in his father's words) a war hero during world war 2. martin was never close with scott, but he wanted to follow in his footsteps regardless.

after all, dad always talked about how great scott was. maybe becoming the kind of man his dad could be proud of would make martin feel closer to the old man.

anyway yeah lmao martin fought in the vietnam war. he was never particularly patriotic, but he went into the war thinking he'd be a *hero* and could *be a great man* just like scott. that didn't happen, though--instead, martin was severely injured in his first battle, and soon after he was medically discharged and sent home.

for the first few months after he came home, martin lived with his mom and sister beth while he recovered. his left leg was completely fucked, and ultimately it had to be amputated. he had to re-learn how to walk and function, and he also had to deal with his family.

during this time, he interacted with salvatore a few times, and he grew to resent sal for the pure, simple fact that sal had an *out.* he didn't *have* to be there, because he had a *job* and a *life* and *friends* who loved him, and he could just fucking go and never come back.

one day, martin met a man named carson, a nurse at the local hospital who was charged with helping martin with his physical therapy. immediately, martin was a huge dick to him--what kind of man took a job as a fucking *nurse* outside of combat?

carson quickly put that bitch in his place and martin shut his mouth REAL fast haha!

eventually, carson and martin became very close, and over the course of several years, they fell in love. eventually, they moved in together in the late 70s. after that, martin mostly stopped talking to his mother and sister, though he keeps in touch sometimes. he's much happier with carson's family.

when sal went missing in the 80s, martin was... unsurprised, but he was definitely upset by it. for a good few weeks, he wondered what could've been if he'd stayed in touch. maybe he could've done something. ultimately, though, he decided to just... move on and not dwell on it too much. enjoy the moment with the love of his life.

he had similar reactions to the deaths of jesse and his mom--sure, it sucked, but he had to keep going. and at least he had carson to lean on, as well as other friends he made over the years.

carson and martin are like... that old gay couple that's been together for decades, married in all but name. they're bonded for life, and they're enjoying growing old together with their dogs. (they have six dogs total: bandit, roger, pirate, zeus, ziggy, and princess)

modern day martin is still a little jackass, but he's settled down. he's no longer as angry and bitter, and now he's just like. a sweet old man.

[mischief-lies-and-stories]

Loki Episode 6 Incoherent Thoughts

Wow, I can't believe the season is over. Spoilers, obviously. Lots of caps lock.

Did I say my stomach hurt last week? I didn't know what that meant. I just got out of a meeting, and my stomach has been hurting for the last hour and a half.

Marvel look at me. If anyone dies I'll kill you. The bar is so fucking low, this is the only thing I'm demanding.

Hey, you know what will be fun? And by fun I mean hopefully poor planning on my part when this doesn't happen? Let's use this note to keep a running tally of how many times I cry in this episode: ||||||| [That's 7.]

AAAAAAAHHHHHHH I haven't even clicked on anything and the Disney+ banner for the show just says "He's good" which could be taken multiple ways and all of them are HURTING ME ALREADY

ARE YOU KIDDING ME MARVEL??!! BOOKENDING THIS SHOW WITH FIRST AND (I'M ASSUMING) LAST EPISODES TITLED THE SAME THING??? There's the first tears holy fuck not fair [This is when I first realized we probably were not getting surprised with a third season, but I didn't want to jinx it.]

I'm not ready for this I'm not ready for this

Oh my god no theme just logo mother fuck oh no wait REVERSE THEME???

Loki but it happens instantaneously

Ohh okay.

Loki bud you gotta go further

WHY DID HE LOOK AT MOBIUS WHEN HE SAID THAT WHY DID HE LOOK AT MOBIUS I'M A FOOL

OH MY GOD WE'RE DOING THIS REALLY FAST OH MY GOD ARE WE GONNA HAVE TIME FOR ALL THE SHIT I SAID WE WEREN'T GONNA HAVE TIME FOR OH NO THERE'S SHIT I DIDN'T WANT TO HAPPEN THAT I THOUGHT WE WOULDN'T HAVE TIME FOR

"Mobius, you're in luck. It looks like Mobius but it's actually Victor Timely." LOKI!!! Speeding up the argument. Hey, is now a good time to bring up the fact that I've had this headcanon that Loki has an eidetic memory, but I've had this headcanon for so long I forgot it was a headcanon, but when he quoted Mobius's words about the jetski back to him last episode, it turned out I was right? He literally just fast forwarded through the argument because HE REMEMBERS IT. (Yes I know I'm stalling I'm sorry I don't want this series to end and also I'm scared)

"Wizard!" Lol

Does he understand ANYTHING that he just said? OR did he just remember THE ENTIRE CONVERSATION WORD FOR FUCKING WORD??? Eidetic memory. I'm pissed I didn't realize this wasn't canon before because now saying I was right means jack shit and I'm stalling again.

FUCKING FUCK CENTURIES??!! Well NOW he gets it (I bet the memory helped though, and the fact that his friends' lives depend on it.)

LOKI PLEASE TELL THEM WHAT'S GOING ON AND WHY YOU HAD TO DO THIS AS SOON AS YOU FUCKING CAN

WAIT

HE'S DONE THIS ENTIRE THING BEFORE

HOW MANY TIMES DOES MOBIUS GRAB HIS JACKET

Wait he's gonna grab him because it's the only way to get him to stop for a second

LOKI PLEASE TELL THEM WHAT'S GOING ON SOON OB LOOKS SCARED

I'm stalling again, I know

I am also scared

Damn that was a very sexy jacket grab but he's weirded out so no kiss grr

LOKI LET HIM GRAB YOU IT'S CUTE

I think even if he succeeds Timely's gonna die

THAT WAS TOO FAST

YEP

GODDAMMIT NO DON'T I DON'T WANT TO DO THIS

I DON'T WANT TO WATCH THIS SHIT AGAIN

DON'T GIVE ME THIS SYLKI BULLSHIT AGAIN

DON'T DO IT

ALSO DON'T KILL HER PLEASE

IS THE ONLY WAY TO STOP HER TO KILL HER DON'T YOU FUCKING DARE MARVEL I WILL END YOU

Oh my god that's why he cries in the trailer

He kills her and goes back to the beginning to stop her before so he doesn't have to kill her

No no no please Apollo get your fucking dodgeball away from me [I maaay have let my accuracy with last episode go to my head a bit...]

Oh. Oh shit

EEW DON'T CALL HIM THAT ABOUT THIS GROSS

FUCK YOU YOU PIECE OF SHIT

OH SHIT LOKI CLEVER BOI

EEW FUCK YOU YOU FUCKING HIGH SCHOOL BULLY LOOKING FUCK

Loki wait why are you alone. You told Sylvie you didn't want to be alone anymore. I thought you'd figured out you can't do this by yourself.

SEND HER BACK

KICK HER THROUGH A TIME DOOR

COME ON LOKI THINK YOU WANTED TIME TO THINK AND YOU GOT IT SO USE IT

GOD I DON'T WANT TO UNDO EVERYTHING

OH MY GOD NO WAIT THIS IS THAT PART IN GROUNDHOG DAY WHERE HE TELLS THE LOVE!!! INTEREST!!! THAT HE'S IN A TIME LOOP

Fucking hell I hate it here I hate time loops I hate repetition

OH MY GOD YOU WENT BACK TO THIS MOMENT TO GET ADVICE??!! LOKI OH MY GOD

LOKI YOU GOT THERE FASTER THAN I DID

OH MY GOD I'M GOING TO BE WRITING ABOUT THIS HEARTBREAKING MOMENT IN MOBIUS'S PAST FOREVER

WHY THE FUCK DID THEY GIVE US THE MOST GUT-WRENCHING CHARACTER BEAT ABOUT MOBIUS IN THE LAST FUCKING EPISODE EXCUSE ME

RAVONNA KILLED AN EIGHT YEAR OLD AND THEY PROMOTED HER

WAIT A FUCKING SECOND WAS THE EIGHT YEAR OLD KID LOKI

WAIT A FUCKING SECOND DID MOBIUS STEP IN TO SAVE ANOTHER LOKI FROM BEING PRUNED

No she's NOT, MOBIUS, YOU'RE THE REASON

GODDAMN THEY'RE BOTH CRYING I KNOW WE SAW THIS IN THE TRAILER BUT OUCH

NO NO NO STOP NO STOP

IF HE DOESN'T FUCKING COME BACK BEFORE THE END I DON'T KNOW WHAT I'M GONNA DO

AND I MEAN MO NOT DON

How many tallies does this scene get because I paused it and I'm sobbing

Like I had to do this in the season one finale, too, but that was because I was angry crying. I've been fucking gut-punched. BY A CLIP THAT WAS IN THE TRAILER TOO I DON'T KNOW WHY I'M SO FUCKING UPSET

Okay. Let's keep going.

JESUS CHRIST WE'RE ONLY HALFWAY THROUGH?! HOW MUCH MORE PAIN CAN I TAKE?!

OKAY the transition from Mobius disappearing and heartbroken Loki to Mobius disappearing and heartbroken Loki IF THEY DON'T MAKE THIS CANON THEY'RE THE FOOLS [I'm so fucking tired of this time loop I seem to be in. Give me some mainstream canon gays in 2023 for the love of god (of stories).]

FUCKING HELL IF YOU KISS HER I'LL KILL YOU MYSELF

NO DON'T YOU FUCKING DARE

DON'T

DON'T

FUCKING HELL DON'T

IF YOU KILL HIM MARVEL I SWEAR YOU'LL REGRET IT I FUCKING SWEAR

NO NO NO

DON'T YOU FUCKING DARE DON'T YOU FUCKING DARE

LOKI DON'T YOU FUCKING DARE

LOKI IF YOU DESTIEL ME I'LL PUNCH A HOLE IN MY TV

IF YOU SYLKI ME AGAIN I'LL PUNCH A HOLE IN MY TV

IF YOU DIE I'LL LOSE MY ENTIRE MIND

FUCK YOU

FUCK YOU

FUCK YOU AND THE FACT THAT I'M ABOUT TO BE WRITING ABOUT THIS SCENE FOR A WEEK

SYLVIE DON'T MAKE THIS SYLKI DON'T

OH MY GOD THE COSTUME CHANGE IT'S NOT THE COAT BUT GUESS WHO SCREAMED

THE HORNS ARE A LITTLE HALLOWEEN COSTUME BUT I'LL TAKE THEM

IF YOU COME BACK FROM THIS AND SYLVIE KISSES YOU I'LL KICK BOTH OF YOUR ASSES THOUGH. I HAD FINALLY STOPPED BEING NERVOUS ABOUT THAT EVERY TIME YOU INTERACTED [I'm aware this fact is not apparent based on all of these posts.]

I refuse to believe the god of stories gets written out of the story that's unacceptable

Set them back into motion and then COME BACK

YGGDRASIL FUCKING HELL YEAH

OH MY GOD HE BECAME THE FUCKING TREE AGAIN

After. Fucking fuck you

THE TREE

VERITY

IF NO ONE CALLS HER VERITY I'M GONNA CUT SOMEONE

BUT I WANTED LOKI TO CALL HER THAT

OB THAT'S NOT HELPFUL

MOBIUS

ANTMAN REFERENCE FUCK YEAH

OH MY GOD HE'S SO SAD FUCK THIS I CAN'T HANDLE THIS I HATE SAD MOBIUS

WHAT FILE

HIS FILE OH MY GOD

PLEASE BE ANYTHING BUT DON I'LL SHRIEK

OH MY GOD HE IS BROKEN THIS IS DESTROYING ME

HE'S ALSO LEAVING I KNOW IT

YEP

MOBIUS

NO IF VERITY CRIES I'M GONNA CRY AGAIN [Oh shit. I have now cried 8 times actually (if we count post-episode tears). I may be too attached to Verity.]

ALIOTH GET HER!!! GET THE BITCH

NO HE IS CRYING IN THIS SCENE NO NO NO

SYLVIE OH MY GOD