#scara angst

[pakunod-a]

Abstained.

A/N: a repost from my old blog (@ayayabaroque) with a few tiny revisions, based on Kung 'Di Rin Lang Ikaw and Sa Ngalan Ng Pag-Ibig, both by December Avenue <3 Warnings: Sumeru Archon Quest spoilers, (Use of Scaramouche's real/given name) horrible English </3

If you aren’t the reason to love, would I stop my heart from getting hurt?

Kunikuzushi was beyond saving, he was impossible to love. His own creator abandoned him, his only friends left him, and being faced with his own immortality, he knows that you’ll leave him too.

You believe that though your flaws of mortality remain, you would do your best to stay by his side for eternity.

But as he drifts of into the company of another, a scholar by the name of Haypasia, you question if he is worth the trouble of loving.

“Scaramouche, it’s been only 2 days after your most recent visit to Haypasia, would it be possible to ask you of one thing?”

He merely scoffs, dismissing the idea of resting, if it meant showing affection to his most devoted follower.

It is a true wonder you haven’t left him yet, despite how inconsiderate he is towards your personal feelings.

If it isn’t you, then it won’t be at all, I won’t hope for us anymore.

The Doctor offered you revenge, wealth, and power, all you had to do was to betray Kunikuzushi.

But you couldn’t bring yourself to put him in a much more dire situation, thus you decline.

Yet do you truly feel this way about him?

“You never truly cared for me, Haypasia has been showing her dedication and devotion to me ever since she made contact with her new-found God.” 

Scaramouche seethes, venom spilling from his mouth

“If I were you, I’d do exactly as Haypasia, in hopes to win over my companion again.”

I’m shivering and I can’t move, my heart can’t force myself to love you anymore.

It proves true that the snow-ridden land of Snezhnaya is not suit to your tastes,

but if it means staying as far away as humanly possible from Scaramouche, you’d go through whatever length to ensure his happiness.

For Haypasia's happiness too, yet not yours.

If the frostbite and cold doesn’t take you, then may the fake god abrew in Sumeru take your life.

You once believed that you would take any step toward a brighter future for you and Kunikuzushi, but it seems near impossible to achieve that, if he is in the glory of another.

Do you truly love him now?

If it won’t be us in the end, I’ll stop myself from loving someone else.

“I vow to stay by your side for eternity, let the damned wake, and let the souls who mourn, do so with agony. I will shield you from the world and all it’s cruelty.” —yet you, who makes such sacrilegious promises, only to succumb to sheer cold, and a slight pang of jealousy toward his “first” follower.

If you couldn’t love another, you might as well die with the vows you’ve made to each other.

That way, when he succeeds in entering godhood, he won’t remember you anymore.

But if I don’t remember who we were, who’ll cry in the morn for us?

Before setting foot into Sumeru, you haven’t even heard of Irminsul.

Much less known that Irminsul contains the memories of everyone, which holds little to no regard from Scaramouche, until he caught wind of what recently happened after his downfall.

“They have been pronounced dead. I believe you have no use for them anyway, since Haypasia is your one and only follower, am I correct?”

Il Dottore, 2nd of the Harbingers, announcing your death to the former Harbinger has his mouth agape and speechless.

He descended into madness, believing that it was all his fault, his status, his arrogance, and his vile nature that caused your death.

Shortly after his defeat, he was assigned to carry out a task for Lesser Lord Kusanali and the Traveler.

Enter Irminsul and attempt to find more information on the Descenders of Teyvat. In his subconscious, his new-found information on the erasure of existence from the Traveler has his full attention. Perhaps, if he never met you, if he never tainted his self-image, you could live happily together with him in his next life. With the knowledge of Irminsul, he begins infiltrating its memories in hopes to have his soul reborn into your arms again. I’m letting go, since I can’t move anymore. But would I stop your heart to yearn for another? He succeeded in erasing The Balladeer’s existence of this world, but it was in vain. You couldn’t hang on to the tiny bit of life you have anymore, and withered away from his grasp. In all the years of his life, he has never experienced such grief in his life. His mind, though hazy, tries to cling on to what little memory he has of you in the back of his mind. Kunikuzushi was impressed to say the least, you really did love him, even if he wouldn’t love you anymore. At the cost of the recognition as a God, the price would be his only source of hope and warmth. “Until the end of our time,  until our hearts feel nothing anymore, even if forever ends, I’ll wait for you in the name of love.” - A/N: i wish that i too, can be erased by irminsul. that sucks. Stay safe, keep yourself hydrated, and continue on treading your path in life, with hopes of success. Believe in yourself, and stay positive. <3 -1, Yuan

[r0ttenhearts]

wasted on you

idol! scaramouche x reader

sypnosis: after an argument with scaramouche he has to perform for a show. the show must go on, despite his mind being anywhere but the present

warnings: angst, arguments, no comfort

“scara, we’re on in 5!”

“i know, i know. just give me a minute.”

scaramouche fumbled with his phone, typing a hasty response and sending it to you. it had only been a few hours since you last spoke, or fought. your angry voice still ringing in his ears, the harsh words left between you two as he left you there. alone.

it was eating at him, the way you looked so defeated. so done.

but you’d still show up for his show, right? you never missed one. even after bickering with him you’d always show. that smile on your face as he met you backstage after every show, embracing you while you praised him for a job well done.

he hoped that would be the case as he stood next to his friends, ready to perform that tedious dance routine heizou had choreographed for the group. painted nails adjusted his mic, a wide smile plastered on his face as he moved with his friends in sync.

his dark eyes scanned the crowd, looking for your usual spot he’d get you tickets for. the memory made him smile, your complaints of not getting the best view when he’d given you a different spot.

his smile faltered for a moment before perking back up as he realized you weren’t there. that comforting presence he’d always find when he felt the most nervous about his ability to perform wasn’t there. the one person he wanted to watch him wasn’t there.

“if you’re going to keep whining why don’t you just leave?”

“do you mean that scara?”

“i can’t even bother to look at your face right now. archons, don’t you see how lucky you are to have me? i could have anyone but i chose you.”

“maybe i shouldn’t have.”

his blood ran cold, recalling his words to you. he hadn’t meant it. he only said it in the moment because he was so angry. so angry about you pestering him. so what if your third year anniversary was on the same day of the concert? you knew how important it was to him, right?

more important than your relationship.

the rest of the concert droned on. he felt like a zombie, the same strenuously practiced choreography being repeated once more to a crowd of thousands of fans. the same songs he’d practiced with the group leaving his lips until they left the stage, heading back to their dressing rooms backstage.

he hoped, prayed, that you’d be there, sitting in his chair and ready to give him a hug. but you weren’t. he was greeted with nothing but an empty room, his makeup on the dresser left the way he had abandoned it. scara swallowed thickly as he pulled out his phone, opening your chat. his heart dropped seeing the “delivered” notification missing.

a dry laugh escaped his lips, almost collapsing at his dresser chair. his fingers tapping on his screen harshly.

scara: (y/n)? did you really block me

scara: this isn’t funny

scara: don’t be like this please.

scara: i didn’t mean it, you know that

he could feel a lump well up in his throat as the “not delivered” notification popped up. his phone was just acting up, right? you didn’t leave him. you couldn’t have. you promised him you’d always be there for him, especially after his mother left him.

it seemed cruel, the way he checked all of his social media accounts to see that you had blocked him on every single one. your bio now missing a ring emoji that you both once had on your profile.

tears welled up in his eyes, fist slamming on his dresser as he thought back to the argument. the very thing that had led to this.

to say he had been stressed was an understatement. with both the concert and your anniversary coming up he was faced with the decision to pick between the two. it almost seemed too easy, but he couldn’t forget the way your face fell as he told you he was still planning to attend to the performance.

you understood, didn’t you? perfect little (y/n) always waiting for him. watching him as he played out his part in the career he enjoyed. he could make it up to you after the concert, anyway. your anniversaries would always come again, but he couldn’t leave his friends high and dry for some relationship.

they needed him! it wasn’t even a question when it came to the two.

but if you knew that, why were you so angry? why did you shout at him that you wanted him to pick you instead?

“i’m sick of this, scara! i want to feel important to you! i don’t want to come second to none for the things you care about!”

“what are you bitching about now? you say this like we haven’t already done something for the other two. stop whining.”

the angry tears in your eyes as you shoved him was not something he was used to seeing. he didn’t think you’d be so upset at the news. even through your anger, your silence scared him more.

“i just thought.. i mattered to you, scara. i guess after three years i still don’t get the memo..”

“don’t be stupid (y/n). if you behave after we can do whatever you want for this stupid anniversary. you’d like that, wouldn’t you? you’re like a dog. threatening to bite but wagging your tail if i give you a crumb of a promise. it’s pathetic, really.”

“i didn’t mean it, i didn’t mean it.” he whispered to himself, eyes glued to your profile that now had him blocked.

“i wish you wouldn’t—“

“are you gonna keep bitching?”

that was the last night he saw you, the last night he ever called you his. he sat alone in that dressing room, his red eyeliner smeared as he cried into his hands. it wasn’t like him at all. he hadn’t realized how much he needed that bond, that intimacy he craved as he’d been lacking in it since he was a child.

maybe then he’d learn to cherish the things he had, before he pushed them away. he’s made a nasty habit of that, hasn’t he?

a/n: i got the idea to throw this together after the ask from @magica-ren so thank you!

part II

taglist: @samarill @sakiimeo @astrolomona @dearsumire @saeism @shoheartluv @0kauy @lelemnh @ayameei @aqualesha @msdevilis

[meowanian]

🎧 ✧. ┊    growing up with scaramouche

ᵎᵎ cw: angst/no comfort, reader is getting bullied, toxic as fuck, reader is getting manipulated.

kindergarten :

being his playmate was hard, because you two were only playing his favourite games.

seeing him play with other kids was hard, especially when he was your only friend.

middle school :

being silenced by him while his friends were making fun of you was hard, especially when you cry at the restroom at breaks.

high school :

being his ‘best friend’ was hard, especially when he makes you buy things for him and his friends with your lunch money.

being his desk mate was hard, because he was only talking to you during exams, asking the answers of the questions.

being in love with him was hard, since he has his eyes on that girl. who seems to be everything you were insecure about.

being with him was hard, but you had to love every second of it because it was what you deserved, he says.

[prishdish]

˖˚˳⊹"i really do love you.. im sorry"˖˚˳⊹

-warnings: Angst, depress!on, su!c!dal thoughts, detachment, scars, body dysmorphia, disassociation, not proofread, chubby reader. -chars mentioned: Scaramouche -wc: 0.6k -a/n: i dont even know what to say.. Um this is .. something.. enjoy?

masterlist

as someone who felt every emotion more intense than others, it also meant feeling more sad. it should've been fine but you simply couldn't feel happy.. you have friends and family but still felt so lonely..

“helloooo” scaramouche waved his hand infront of your face to get your attention.

Suddenly looking up, you see him frowning at you. “what’re you thinking so hard about.. do you not wanna watch the movie?”

“sorry.. i just spaced out” you said embarrassed.. “just continue the movie, ill pay attention this time”.. Scara simply muttered a small ‘fine’ and resumed it.

Scaramouche is your best friend, the one you share everything with. But.. he could never understand the depth of your emotions.. The void you feel inside.. The aching loneliness that consumes you at every moment.

“Yes lets go to the beach!! itll be perf....”

“ooh i just bought a new bikini…..”

“wont it be too sunny? ill get tanne….”

you drowned out their conversation and thought of excuses to skip… you had no other choice.. a bikini wouldn't cover your scars, stretch marks or tummy fat.. it would be on display for everyone to see your insecurities and then they'd hate you.

“guys im sorry but i have to study this weekend.. exams are close”

“again? but didnt you say the same last week…”

“oh come on! itll be so fun…”

“ugh she does the same everytime…”

Ofcourse they wouldn't understand.. They had the perfect body..

The words were blurred as you tried to read them.. Nothing made sense to you anymore.. Your exams were near and you have to study but the words together don't make sense anymore..

Sighing, you went to splash some water on your face to wake yourself up. Looking up into the mirror, you saw failure.. Someone who cant study.. Someone who wouldnt be able to make a living..

You sat back down at your desk.. You can study and change your future right? its just a book..

But.. you cant make yourself read the words anymore.. you felt so tired..

Why cant you also be like others?.. Everyone else is so successful and perfect.. They have good grades, perfect body and happy lives..

You sat on the edge of the roof.. This used to be your hang out spot with Scara but eventually you both stopped meeting there.

“where the fuc- YOURE HERE?” Scara dramatically sighed, huffing. “Ive been searching all over for you. Come on, ive made dinner.. you have to eat something”

You chucked softly at his caring nature and nodded silently.. “Scara?” he was about to leave but turned back to look at you “yeah?”

“I love you”

He chuckled in confusion “yeah yeah i get it, i love you too. no need to get all sentimental with me, its just dinner.”

You turned back to the sky once he left. He probably went to your kitchen to fill a plate for you..

You smiled at the thought. He was the best person you could've asked for..

And it hurts. He cared for you so much but you couldn't appreciate it..

Leaving never had to be this painful.. But a tear fell down and you closed your eyes, recounting your memories..

There were so many happy moments you never got to enjoy.. Sad moments you stayed numb.. And the huge gap in your memory.. and nobody knew how you felt because you never let them.

‘Im so tired… Im so tired..” You looked at your feet, dangling off the roof.. ‘i hate this .. i dont wanna do this.. but theres nothing else to be done’

You took a deep breath in.. “i really do love you.. im sorry”...

…..

tags: @rubywonu @stygianoir @unsavoy-melon @kashiiwi @babbledabble25

[suguru-getos]

yandere genshin characters x punishments (gn! reader)

warnings: yandere themes, mdni, mentions of emotional, sexual abuse, isolation, manipulation, degradation.

a/n: feeling dark sorta way 😈

characters included: scaramouche, ayato, diluc,

scaramouche: things with him range from getting minor chidding for being mouthy to a full blown rage fest. he is scared of hurting you physically knowing the intense power he holds. plus— it isn’t very good to hurt the people we love; right? all he wants is to protect you. keep you safe and sound. not his problem that you can’t understand what’s truly, undeniably good for you. uses isolation as his weapon. you would be locked in, spoiled with your favorite food, on time. but you aren’t allowed to see anyone, not even him… one week in & you are already vulnerable & folded. the silence is tearing your eardrums apart. there is nothing you miss more than to be held by scara. to talk to him…. to be with him & listen to him spoil you. so the next morning when he comes to you with food, you break down. big fat tears rolling through your cheeks as you hug him, shoulders dropped low and anxiety folding you. “please— kuni, please don’t leave me alone, i don’t like this,” the break in your voice almost breaks his heart. but he knows you need to learn your lessons. and sometimes, not in the most desired of ways. “good little angel, sssh~” he cooes, kissing your forehead. “but i want to really, really know if you mean your words. let’s make it another two days hm?” the look of betrayal in your eyes is soon swiped away, when he leans in and kisses you softly, but his will & decision unshakable. maybe after another two days, you will understand how much, you are lucky enough to have someone like him tend to you, always.

ayato: ayato has two sides, one that is ever so gentle, kind, tolerant to your antics. the other… is the side that you never want to see; the spoiled, belittling brat side to him. “surely you must know by now why exactly you are treated like a whore?” ayato mused, watching your naked sex stuffed with a dildo that was of his size. “do you even deserve to be touched by me rather?” he sits in front of you, it’s been literal hours you have been forced to cockwarm the toy. tears prickling into your eyes, you whine out & bite your lip. all of this because you decided to tell ayato that he isn’t deserving of you, that you’d rather be a slut to any man that be his lover. because ayato is selfish, self-centered & narcissistic. and you— almost had enough of it. ‘almost’ until you saw this side of him. the side drenched with cruelty and mania. “yato-“ you cried out, “uh uh uh? what did you say?” you immediately flinched at that statement, correcting your words, “waka sama- i’m sorry, i’m sorry— please!” it felt a little too overwhelming, overbearing, with how he sat next to you, tending to his official matters until he decided it was time to take a break. you almost forgot that ayato loves you, sickeningly, disgustingly but he does… feeling smaller, and smaller. almost insignificant in front of his wrath. “i’m sorry—” you managed to mumble one more time, knowing completely well it was not what he wanted to hear. “i will never go to anybody else,” that got you a change of his look. he was looking at you with softened eyes, almost reconsidering his idea of punishing you any further. scoffing at your statement, his gloved hands removed the toy from your drooling sex, kissing it softly. “good little thing,”

diluc: the wine tycoon of monstadt was already intimidating to everyone. coursing fear and respect through everyone’s veins whether they wanted it or not. all you had to do, to feel the same anxiety from his otherwise warm presence was to go out of dawn winery, and get yourself surrounded by cryo slimes. why would you never understand that you. are not. allowed. to step. the fuck out? diluc didn’t talk to you, he didn’t want to hurt his angel by words, or by actions after he safely protected you. but his aloofness was killing you already. truth be told, diluc was a soft yandere, and you dearly, dearly loved him. leaving you be by your rooms, working his job as the dark knight. and coming back to sleep in a bed that is different from yours was enough to carve little pieces of your heart out into the abyss. you loved him, and you wanted to be loved. the silent treatment was not helping— despite you waking up early and waiting long in the nights to get a chance to talk to him. it just wasn’t working. diluc was not happy… until one day you just couldn’t take it, your silent sobs echoed through his room when he came home one night. immediately rushing towards you and hugging you tenderly. “hey hey hey— why are you crying?” diluc softly cooed, kissing your tears away. “hey- listen, i-” before he could complete, your whines escaped, sounding complaint-laced. “you don’t wanna even talk to me these days! i will never talk to you either fuckkk you!” you were angry at him, but you were leaning into his soft touch. “i love you, i’m sorry— i just, got scared okay? scared that my paranoia might hurt you and became distant..” the whole night, you and diluc got comfortable by sharing silences and sentences that you both needed to hear.

[fictoculus]

hi! i was wondering if you could do wanderer, tighnari, childe, heizou, and maybe thoma with a reader who suffers from like severe depression? like they have no motivation to do anything and they’re always tired and sad and all of that depression stuff (i put that really mildly but i think you get my gist). and maybe if possible could you include that like, the reader is always helping other people and never helps themself because they don’t think they deserve it?

i’m sorry if this is too heavy a request. no pressure and no worries if you don’t want to do it!

౨ৎ no matter how alone you feel, i am always here...

send a request!┊masterlist┊taglist applications

FEAT... wanderer/kuni, tighnari, childe, heizou

A/N... hellooo, thank you so much for this request, i'd be more than happy to write this for you! i'm so sorry but i had to remove thoma from the mix as i couldn't come up with any ideas for himmm. also also i apologise if childe's section is super ooc, i really struggle writing for him, but this is good practice! i did include other mental health related topics that can link to depression as i wanted to try and connect with as many people as possible. this does not mean i expect you to be suffering from those things, and in no way do you have to in order to be suffering from depression. if you are, that's ok too ♡

WARNINGS... self harm (heizou), depression, injury, home-neglect/"depression home" (childe), suicidal thoughts (tighnari), references to derealisation (wanderer/kuni), swearing

✧ wanderer.

♪ wanderer, can be harsh, and has proven to have quite the tough exterior. that doesn't mean he loves you any less. and so, when he found out how you'd really been feeling, and that you'd been having to put up with it alone? he was absolutely heartbroken.

♪ you had forced yourself to get out of bed that morning, feeling almost limp as you stumbled down the stairs. nothing felt real. nothing felt like it mattered.

"morni- are you ok?" tear stains ran down your cheeks, your eyelashes still damp and your eyes bloodshot. the tip of your nose was a soft shade of pink, and the colour of your lips was slightly more vibrant than usual. "have you been crying?"

♪ it would have been one of the only times his shell completely shattered, leaving his interior exposed as he cried; not for you, but with you. the two of you wouldn't have said a word, but instead just sat wrapped around each other, in silence.

♪ with anyone else, he would've been embarrassed. being seen crying was not something many would expect of the wanderer; but it was you. you were hurting, you needed him, and so he wasn't afraid to be vulnerable around you if that's what it takes.

"shhhh, i know, i know... i'm sorry" wanderer, or kuni as you call him, was cradling you in his arms, rocking from side to side and burying his face in your hair. he was trying his best to keep himself together, using your scent to ground himself. "stop- please" tears threatened to spill as you broke apart right in front of him, squirming in his arms, but he refused to let you go. his grip only tightened, pulling your back further into him until you finally stopped thrashing, only to break down into tears. you felt him tremble against your back, his arms shaking slightly as his own tears began to dampen your hair.

♪ he'd known something was off about you, but he had confidence in your strength, you're one of the strongest people he's ever known, after all; but he often fails to realise that everyone can be weak sometimes, and that is one of the beauties of life.

♪ leaving you to handle things alone seemed like the best solution to wanderer; your mind needed the time to rest, to give itself a kickstart and power on like usual... but, oh, how he was wrong.

♪ probably the last thing you needed was to be alone, whether you knew it or not. you needed him; his voice, his gentle touch, his loving kisses, his words - however harsh they may sometimes be.

"it's hard work loving me, isn't it? you... you don't deserve to have to live like this, kuni" "don't say that, it's all work worth doing... you deserve the world, [name], and so much more, more than i could ever give you, got that?" his words carry meaning, so much more than a poem, a song, a kiss. they're unwavering, deeply engraved into the forefront of your mind the moment they slip from his lips. "i'll do this a hundred times if i have to, i don't care. i will still love you all the same, ok? i know i don't say it a lot, but nothing can ever change that, and that's a fact."

♪ he'd hug you until the sun goes down, taking your hand in his own and slowly guiding you to the bedroom once the time to rest arose. physical touch is a love language of his, since he often struggles with his words, and so he cuddled you through the night, instinctively squeezing you just a little tighter than usual.

"i will never leave you, [name]... no matter how alone you feel, i am always here"

✧ tighnari.

♪ tighnari has been out on a trip to aaru village for a few days now - planning to observe how different species of plants grow in different climates - leaving you alone in gandharva ville to watch over collei while he's gone. you do love collei, but sometimes she can be... a bit hard to handle; often getting herself into trouble. it's a lot to deal with, especially with that peculiar numbness which has been dragging you down for weeks now...

♪ unexpectedly, your lover had come home early from his trip; there had been some sort of 'incident' in aaru village which was to remain confidential, even tighnari didn't know the details.

♪ he'd half expected to find you in the kitchen, having lunch with collei, or perhaps reading that book you were obsessed with (which now fails to peak your interest), but instead he finds you curled up in bed, trembling.

"love?" "... nari? y- you're back?" you replied, your voice woven with surprise yet you couldn't bring yourself to show him your face.

♪ concerned, he sat on the edge of the bed, positioning himself so that he was facing the lump which he assumed was you. you shuffled, the sheets rustling as you tried to get closer to him, finding his presence alone comforting.

"are you ok, darling?" "hm? yeah, yeah i'm- i'm ok, i'm good" "would you look at me? i haven't seen you in so long, i want to see the beautiful face of yours"

♪ smart, that's what he was, smart and cunning. he already knew you were crying the moment he stepped into this house, his sensitive ears picking up your sniffles and broken sobs. he wanted to comfort you, to be there for you, maybe (definetely) even hold you, but how was he meant to if you hide yourself away from him?

♪ reluctantly, you turned to face him, showing him your teary eyes but hiding the rest of your face under the bed covers. he reached out and pulled them away from you, leaning down to kiss your nose softly and giving you a weak smile. a couple tears began to fall down your cheeks, but he kissed them away too, trying his bst to show just how much he loves you

"what's the matter, hun? what's been bothering you?" you take a deep breath; this is it, your chance, your chance to tell him everything, to finally confide in him. "things have been hard you know... having to take care of collei, running errands, just- everything, all while having this aching numbness in my chest..." "numbness? love, what do you mean?" "i don't know... it sounds silly i-" he jumps to interrupt you, to reassure you and show how patient he's willing to be with you. he never wants you to dismiss your feelings; he takes your wellbeing very seriously. "no, no it really doesn't, i'm just trying to wrap my head around everything that's all" "are you sure? we don't have to talk about it if-" "no, darling, i'm sure" "ok, well... it's just been lonely, and it's really hurting... i just wish everything would end"

♪ tighnari felt his heart shatter in that moment; you wanted it to end? the love of his life, the one most precious to him, has gotten to the point where they want to completely give up, and it breaks him.

♪ he slowly lowers himself down on top of you, wrapping his arms around you waist and rolling the two of you over so that you were ontop of him, cradling you in his arms and - unbeknownst to you - silently crying with you.

♪ the two of you just lay there in eachothers arms, refusing to let go of the other, tangled together under the covers. it must have been a couple hours before tighnari broke the silence, deciding that you'd had long enough to reflect and attempt to calm yourself down.

"[name], listen to me... no matter how alone you feel, i am always here, ok? i love you so much, and i'm sorry you've had to go through this alone. i will help you, i'm fighting with you now""you don't have to promise me anything, just... please consider coming to me whenever you're thinking like this, ok?" "i will, thank you, nari... i love you"

✧ childe.

♪ both you and childe have a fairly packed schedule, running around liyue day in day out to keep people happy. your beloved seems almost completely unaffected, getting riled up at pesky customers being the worst of his worries, you - on the other hand - had an entirely different load.

♪ due to the fact that the two of you were so busy, you rarely got to see eachother, maybe brushing by eachother but only being able to share a kiss before one of you got dragged off to more business. so, you always made sure to make time for eachother, clearing out at least two days on your calendar (typically wednesdays and saturdays) to spend together, telling the other all the exciting or nerve-wracking things you had encountered in the week

♪ however, what childe doesn't know is that you'd been off the job for almost a month now, spending your days in your own home, stuck in bed despite the voice deep in the back of your mind willing you to get up...

"honey, you home? you kept me waiting you know..." no response... little did he know, you were cursing under your breath; it's wednesday. you paced your room in panic before stopping in front of the mirror, gripping at your hair when you saw your reflection. you practically slammed yourself forward, hands now on the mirror as you traced your reflection's 'imperfections'. you were completely lost in your own head, too lost, in fact, to notice you were the only thing keeping the mirror from crashing down, the already loose screws falling to the floor as soon as you applied pressure. "fuck!!" you yelled, the glass shattering all over your floor, luckily not digging into your skin, but you didn't come out completely unscathed, a couple scratches ;iterring your hands and legs. "love? [name]?! open the door! are you ok?!" he shouts, pounding on your front door, the entirety of liyue must have been able to hear him. "don't come in!! please, just wait, i'll be right there! i'm ok! just please-"

♪ without waiting another moment and completely dismissing your pleas - due to pure concern - he unlocks your door with the key you gave him, walking into your apartment but finding it almost unrecognisable. it was a mess; clothes strewn across the floor, garbage piling up on the kitchen table and beside your bedroom door.

"[name]? hun, what's going on?" you could hear the concern weighing his voice down, it becoming lower and scratchier as he approaches your bedroom. "ah- i told you not to come in!"

♪ he pushes your door open, only to freeze in the doorway when he caught sight of you, greasy hair tangled into a nest-like structure, dark circles making your eyes pop.

"holy shit!! what in teyvat happened? are- are you ok!?" his eyes are wide, hands shaking as he approaches you slowly, holding your shoulders as he scanned you up and down. "archons, what happened... love, is there something going on? is someone hurting you? has someone done something? talk to me! please i just-"

♪ the whole situation was more than just overwhelming; being stood in a ring of shattered glass, exhausted, embarassed, the whole package.

♪ naturally, you began to tear up, lowering yourself down until your were squatting, holding your head in you hands and sobbing, all while childe stood and watched; he didn't know what to do.

♪ he'd never seen you like this before, so vulnerable, so afraid, so hurt; and it hurt him too. carefully, he swept away the glass with his foot, creating a path for you to 'escape' safely and into his arms, which you did; slamming yourself into him and burying your face in his chest.

"i- i'm sorry, i'm so sorry i forgot and- and my place is a mess and i'm- i'm a mess and, archons- childe... childe, i'm falling apart" "shhhh, you're ok, i'm here now, ok? just breath for me, love" "it- it's just so hard, y'know? alone... i'm so alone, i- i can't do this alone, fuck i'm sorry, i just- it feels like i'm losing control of myself; i can't even think straight anymore and i feel so dazed all the time and... i'm lonely, e- even though i'm surrounded by so many people, i'm so lonely"

♪ he let's you talk, not daring to interrupt you, just listening to you, holding you close and stroking your arm in an attempt to reassure you. only when you stop talking does he pull away, peppering your face in loving kisses before planting an especially sweet one on your lips.

"honey, stop, i'm all gross and-" "i don't care"

♪ and he shows you that he doesn't, kissing you again and again; your cheeks, your forehead, your nose, your lips, everywhere. he has so much love for you, and he just keeps on giving. he doesn't care if you don't think you deserve it, if you don't think he should have to 'deal with you'; he gives it to you regardless, and that's something you can't help but love about him.

"no matter how alone you feel, i am always here, understand? i love you, [name], and i care about you, more than anything; more than my job, the fatui, mora, the list goes on. nothing is more important to me than you, and i'm not ashamed to say it. i am the one who doesn't deserve you, i'm blessed to even know you, nevermind have the privilige of loving you. so accept it, please, take my love, my heart, my everything; all my being is here for you." "archons, i love you, childe" "i love you, [name]"

(big ass dramatic speech for our drama queen) (rest assured, he meant every word)

✧ heizou.

♪ the man is a detective, so he quite quickly caught on, but was hesitant to mention it, bringing it up jokingly only for you to completely dismiss it. heizou could tell by the look in your eyes alone that something was seriously wrong; the old sparkle being replaced by a dull void. nevertheless, he would still get lost in your eyes, but feel as if he were falling down a bottomless pit; it was like he could feel what you were feeling, see what you were seeing, and it hurt.

♪ he'd be returning home from a long day of detective work, uncovering clues and deciphering codes to find missing persons, his eyelids dropping as he locked the front door behind him

"honey, i'm home!" he calls out, knowing well how cheesy the phrase was, and using that to his advantage, wanting the first thing he sees after a long day on the job to be your smile. "love?" after hearing no response - not even the shuffling of your slippers against the wooden floorboards - he grew concerned, eyebrows furrowing as he began to wonder: "where could they be?"

♪ someone coming after you must be his most dreaded nightmare; a thought that haunts him late at night, though thankfully the sight of you sleeping soundly next to him always seems to calm him, but this time you aren't there... you aren't there beside him to comfort him, to show him you're safe, to prove to him you aren't hurt. the poor man is stood in the entryway of your shared home, eyes wide and scanning the coat hooks for any missing coats, or the shoe rack for any easy-access pairs you may have grabbed if you were faced with the need to run.

♪ merely thinking about a criminal exploiting heizou's soft spot for you as revenge for proving them guilty sent chills down his spine, the thought of you being hurt scaring you more than anything ever could, even more than some of his worst cases.

"calm down, heizou, they're probably fine" he reassures himself, trying to keep calm and prevent himself from thinking (or acting) irrationally. finally stepping into the front room, heizou's eyes switch from doorway to doorway, trying to decide where you're most likely to be. watching tv in the living room? nope. cooking dinner in the kitchen? not there either. showering in the bathroom? still no. watering the plants in the back garden? this late at night? no way! sleeping in the bedroom? not quite...

♪ peeking through the crack in the bedroom door, he sees you sat on the edge of the bed, hunched over and unmoving. his first thought is to burst through the door and hug you, lifting you off your feet and spinning you around in relief... that is until his eyes recognise the red trickling down your thighs...

♪ you wanted to feel something, anything. an escape from this numbness was all you wanted, all you needed, yet it would slip from your grasp as soon as the pain subsided. it was unloving, unforgiving, cruel; leaving you alone once more, staring a hole into the blank spot of yours and heizou's bedroom wall.

"you thought i wouldn't notice, love? i am a detective, y'know..."

♪ yes, admittedly it wasn't the best choice of words, but in all honesty, he wasn't quite sure how to react. he pushed the door open, poking his head through first with a weak smile before opening it further and sliding through the gap. no matter how hard he tried to hide it, you could see his eyes welling up with tears, his bottom lip wavering as he looked you in the eyes.

"can... would it be ok if i come closer?" his gentle voice calls out, you can hear the sadness in your voice, and it hit your heart with a 'twang'. you nod meekly, reaching out your hand to grab a cloth and covering your leg, but he grabs your wrist to stop you "please, let me see?" "'zou... you don't need to help me" "[name], i want to help you, i'm choosing to do this... so please"

♪ at first you're doubtful, confused as to why anyone would want to give you this kind of help, especially heizou. not because you view him negatively, but because you could tell he was exhausted; being a detective is hard work, and has proven to be very draining.

♪ deep down you didn't think you deserved it. despite always being happy and willing to help others, nobody ever seems to want to return the favour, and so your frozen in shock - not pain - when he begins cleaning your wounds.

"do you maybe wanna talk about it?" he asks, looking up at you with kind eyes, showing you how genuine he was. whatever was bothering you, he wanted to know, he wanted to help, because you deserve his help. "... m- maybe later?" as much as you hate to dissapoint him, you can't bring yourself to even think about how you'd explain all this to heizou; not wanting to scare him or become 'one of his clients', though you know he would never treat you that way. "of course, whenever you need, love... you know i love you, right? and... and that no matter how alone you feel, i am always here" "i love you..."

thanks for reading ♡ want to read more? my requests are OPEN, so please feel free to let me know what you'd like me to write next!

☆ a little message i wanted to share... ( feel free to skip)

"i know some random person from the internet saying this may not help, but i want you to know that you are loved, you are cared for, whether you know it or not. there are billions of people on this planet, not one of us are the same, and so no one will ever really know how you're feeling, but that's ok. this is something you are going through and something you will get yourself out of. yes, it will take time, and it'll be hard, but i believe in you. nobody knows you better than yourself. if you think doing something, anything, will make you feel worse, don't do it. you know your boundaries better than anyone, no matter what other people say. take your time. of course, it's good to help others, but sometimes you'd be helping other people more if you took a second to take care of yourself. you do deserve it. please stay safe and take care of yourself. ily ♡"

© FICTOCULUS 2023; please do not steal, translate, or repost my works as your own

[ugly-pickle]

wait!- ☆ scara

CHARACTERS: idol!scara x gn!reader

SYNOPSIS: scara had always promised you that he will always love you and will always have time for you, but he never confirmed that hes a man of his word…

GENRE: angst 🦢 (comfort from another at the end)

W/C: 1.3k

C/W: cheating, moaning, hinting of intoxication, kissing, toxicity, and cussing (if theres anything that i missed let me know!)

A/N: a lot of people liked my previous post so it motivated me to make another! im still new at this so please keep that in mind if a few bits are off (IT’S REALLY REALLY REALLY CRINGY). most grammatical errors are also intentional!

your boyfriend, scara, has a performance today and youre really excited. you received flowers, theyre beautiful. maybe this is an apology for the lack of affection and being more grumpy towards you lately, i mean to be an idol certainly is tiring, isnt it? so it makes perfect sense why he’s acting like this… right?

as always, he gave you tickets to his concert. you couldnt get the chance to say goodbye to him because he left so early in the morning, so youll make it up to him when you meet him backstage.

you got dressed and headed out the door, youre excited to see your beloved scara preform, because he looked happy while doing his job, you were excited to see his smile because… well, he doesnt smile at you anymore… but you quickly brush it off, i mean, being an idol is very stressful.

youve arrived, you tried to enter backstage but some bodyguard stopped you, “hey! what do you think youre doing missy?” you sigh, he must be new, “scara is my lover, i just want to see him,” you try to explain but the bodyguard cuts you off and says “thats what they all say,” he rolls his eyes. “no! really, i am!” you show the bodyguard a picture of you and scara together kissing, “oh” the bodyguard grunts, “so youll let me in?” you look up at him, he looks a bit uncomfortable, “well uhm… ive been given specific orders to not let you in… im sorry,”

“w-what?...”

you heard him loud and clear, the world around you begins to spin, but you quickly ground yourself by comforting yourself with false hopes. maybe hes just planning a surprise for you back there, i mean, it might explain why you got flowers, yea! that must be the reason… you hope.

you found your spot, perfect timing too! the concert begins, you see scara. you melt when you see a smile on his lips, he looks so happy. the crowd screams, theyre chanting 5wirl (the name of their group). venti, xiao, kazuha, heizou, and scara is greeting the audience with warms smiles and kind words.

after a while, the performance ends, it was quite long actually, but it felt so short, time does fly when youre having fun. you head to the backstage doors, hoping that the bodyguard lets you in this time. as you make your way to the backstage doors you see scara’s back in your peripheral vision. hes in a secluded place, he looks like hes trying to be hidden from the crowd, makes sense. you decide to scare him, as you get closer you can see a beautiful lady’s lips pressed against scara’s. you hear the sounds of kissing and soft moaning coming from them.

your heart shatters into a million pieces, it broke so bad that you swore you heard it make a shattering sound. tears fall down your face, youre so stunned that you cant even form words, instead, a pathetic whimpering sound escapes your lips. scara turns around to see where the strange sound is coming from.

his eyes widen a bit, but he immediately regains his composure. “stop crying like a baby and get over it, youre just a nuisance in my life,” now scara was just stomping all over your already broken heart. these simple actions somehow drained all of your energy, just standing was exhausting, not wanting to waste time or energy you give him an “ok,” and you turn around and leave.

you arrive at your shared apartment and decide to eat and rest for a little, so when he comes back you can properly confront him. but, he comes back the next day, hes wasted and the smell of sex is clinging onto him. he walks past you and immediately collapses on the couch and knocks out cold.

when he finally wakes up, youre making dinner. he remembers the encounter from last night. his eyes wander, wanting to look at anything but you. something in the trashcan catches his eye, the flowers. theyre pretty but it didnt come from him.

youve finished cooking, you see scara sitting at the table. you sit down, and placed your meal in front of you and you start to eat. “…what about mine?” scara asks you with a quiet voice. “oh wow, youre initiating a conversation with the nuisance. well, if you must know, that having to take care of you is quite tiring and ive realized that youre quite troublesome and it would be better if you werent in my life. so, kunikuzushi, im breaking up with you.”

hes taken aback when you use his birth name, “h-hey y/n, i didnt mean what i said yesterday… i regret it, it was just the heat of the moment,” he says, his voice trembling a bit. you sigh, “that still doesnt change the fact that you cheated on me, pack your bags and leave, this is my apartment after all,”

his trembling demeanour quickly turned aggressive, “DO YOU KNOW HOW MUCH LOVE AND TIME IVE SPENT ON YOU?” you scoff, “WHAT LOVE? WHAT TIME? SURE, YOUVE PROMISED ME THESE THINGS BUT HAVE YOU EVER FULFILLED IT? EVER SINCE YOU BECAME AN IDOL, EVERYTHING ABOUT YOU CHANGED,”

the two of you are now yelling. “WELL, BEING AN IDOL IS TIRING, AND BEING BOUND TO ONLY YOU IS TIRING. ANEMO RESEMBLES FREEDOM, I CANT JUST BE BOUND TO YOU. A-AND SHE LOVES ME FOR WHO I AM” youre hurt, you stop yelling, “she loves you for who you are today, but will she when you have nothing?” “NO ONE LOVED ME WHEN I HAD NOTHING, WHEN I WAS NOTHING-“ “I FUCKING DID”

your voice begins to break, “i loved you when you had nothing, i was the one who helped you get back on your feet,” you sigh, hot tears now spilling down your face, “im gonna take a walk, and when i come back your things better be packed.” you leave the apartment, “you didnt even get to enjoy your meal,” he mumbles to himself. he begins to pack his things.

youre walking towards the park, youre tears making your cheeks glisten in the sunlight. you spot kazuha admiring the scenery, hes sitting down on a bench with a pen and notebook in hand, you assume he was making song lyrics or a haiku. you walk up to kazuha and wipe away your tears, “u-uhm hey kazu,” you sit down beside him. “oh hey y/n! nice seeing you here!” his voice is warm and comforting.

“im surprised that you arent swarmed by paparazzi yet,” you giggle, “me too, the quiet is very relaxing. my day has become better now that youre here. wheres scara?” you can feel your eyes watering up “we broke up… he cheated on me,” kazuha hugs you, patting your back, tears are now falling down your face. “you dont deserve that, you really dont, youre one of the most amazing people that i know.”

tip tap tip tap tip tap

you hear the sound of footsteps running, it’s probably someone jogging. kazuha tucks your hair behind your ear while looking you in the eyes.

“WAIT!-“

kazuha presses a gentle kiss on your forehead. you turn your head to see who had just called out, it was scara, he was standing there in shock, tears slipping down his face. “YOU BITCH KAZUHA,” scara yells at him. the bouquet of flowers you threw out earlier was now in his hands. “YOU LIKE Y/N, DONT YOU? YOU HAVE HER THESE FLOWERS, RIGHT?” scara scoffs, “and what if i do? theres no harm in having a crush, unlike cheating on your lover. and, i did give those flowers to her, so what?”

scara turns to you “b-baby you still love me right? a-and not this bastard, right?” his voice seems desperate, “kunikuzushi i-”

A/N: UHMM I LITERALLY HAD NO IDEA HOW TO END THIS- I AT LEAST TRIED LOL ┐༼ ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°༽┌

(ngl i wanna make a part 2 because the ending was so messy ‧º·(˚ ˃̣̣̥⌓˂̣̣̥ )‧º· )

TAGLIST @justaxiaosimp @mommykukki @xdrin @midnight-pluto @boomie-123 @scaramochies @dnsuhwr874y @hopefulceladon @yukinenikora @akusiapaakudimana @mai-yay @uhfhfhfhf

[sakxramxlkii]

WANDERER MISSES YOU - ONESHOT PT. 1

Prompt mildly Inspired by @Trixie_Rizz

PROMPT : Wanderer is a little tsundere (he's still dom tho), he just misses you, ANGST?, NOT THE TRAVELER'S POV

WARNINGS: Pretty much none

You met Wanderer when he was still cold and hated being around anyone. You had always stuck around him, and he had always found it irritating that you did. However one hangout eventually led to travelling all of Sumeru together, mainly particularly the rainforest. You had both gone on adventures together, taking up side quests from people that you mainly obliged and he didn't. He always just did something else while you helped someone with their issues.

As time went by however, he gradually began growing a liking to you, which eventually led to feelings and a jumble of struggles to confess his feelings towards you. When he did, a relief was washed through him knowing that you had felt the same way. That was the day you both began travelling together with a deeper bond, as lovers.

You had grew up in Inazuma for practically your whole life and your trip in Sumeru had come to a stop. You were having so much fun with your boyfriend that you forgot that it was all just a trip. You both feared that this relationship wouldn't last and that the trip ending would put an end to continue it.

Wanderer didn't wanna go to Inazuma with you, he hated that nation due to it being ran over by his own mother. The region gives him horrifying memories of his deeds and betrayals. He didn't wanna go nor did he want YOU to go. It saddened him that you were only in Sumeru for a trip, he'd much rather lie in comforts with you while talking to his pseudo sister, Nahida right now.

So there you were, luggage and ticket in hand while the sound of trains rang. Wanderer looked away, he often acted cold towards this relationship but you knew deep down he cared. His emotions spiralled in him as if you were making a cocktail of his emotions, he was glad you get to see your family again, he may be blunt with his words but he will always love you. At the same time however, he had grown such a deep bond with you, combining this with his abandonment issues, he felt betrayed, almost as if he was gonna cry in public and spoil his pride.

Lips quivering, "Tch. Do you seriously have to go? I mean, i'm certain this trip was far better than that trashy wasteland labelled as a region." "Yes I do, Wanderer. I'll be back to visit i promise." He bit back a few tears, and to your surprise, he hugged you. "If you leave me, i'm hunting you down and killing you." He spoke nonchalantly to which you chuckled to. "You'll come back, won't you?" "I will, i promise, i'll write to you every single week as well." "Whatever."

THERE WILL BE A PART 2 I PROMISEEEEE. I HAVE EVERYTHING PLANNED. anyway pLEASE PLEASE PLEASE give me some oneshot requests to write. (I will only write for reader x genshin men)

[kurolumiis]

ooo ,, mayy i request reader coming home late because we got too distracted in the inazuman markets ,, n then there’s scara, worried sick about us 🙏

warnings — established relationship, slight angst, fluff, slight spoilers to scaramouche’s backstory, self indulgent, slight suggestiveness, he’s a little insecure over his ball joints, short but sweet <3

notes — ngl almost had the urge to cry while writing his insecurity, also it’s just a small hc of mine, ur free to not interact / disagree ! i luv him sm i wanna kiss him all over <3

when you arrived at home, you were met when an upset and worried scaramouche. “where the hell were you? did you get hurt? are you—” “scara, i’m fine!” you cupped his face softly. “i just got distracted at the markets that’s all.”

he let out a sigh of relief, but still inspected you. “i’m fine, love. promise,” you cooed softly. the fear in his eyes slowly diminished. he nodded, looking down. “hey, i’m not going anywhere. i’m not gonna leave you.”

“you promise?” he mumbled. “promise,” you said, and you meant it.

your entire life you never had been in any danger for the most part, and when you were, you were whisked away by your mother. even with being in a relationship with scaramouche, the fatui had been ordered to protect you at all costs. of course, the members could never deny lord scaramouche.

“let’s go to bed, okay?” you asked, smiling when he nodded. you clasped his hand and headed towards your shared bedroom.

as you changed out of your day clothes, scaramouche tried his best not to stare. he kept a respectful gaze away from you, but still snuck a few peeks at your body. he couldn’t help but admire it.

when you both dressed into your pajamas, scaramouche just in his boxers, you both slipped into bed and laid close to each other.

“i love you, scara—every part of you, even the parts that you hate, i love,” you told him with not a hint of dishonesty in your voice, trailing your fingers down to caress the ball joints on his knees.

he shuddered at the feeling and you immediately pecked his lips. smiling slightly, you continued to stroke his ball joints lovingly. “i mean it, scara. i love every part of you, flaws and all.”

[a-dragon-in-a-corner]

drawing this puppet twink is fun

(and for the whump lovers out there: yes, that one string/cable is attached to his neck)

[rivkadreamer]

Lonely Wanderer.

a/n: This took a little while, I kept going back and forth, I'm still trying to get a good hand at writing his personality. Anyways, enjoy your food.

Genre: Fluff, angst, Hurt/comfort(ish)

Warnings: Implied character death, not proof read

Summary: In which Wanderer muses how good it must be, this feeling called love.

Imagine Wanderer who's been longing for love for as long as he can remember.

Wanderer who different from what many people think, knows what is love and how to identify it.

He observed it as Kabukimono, in the way the father's of the blacksmith village carried their sons around their back, the way the mother's chastised their kids whenever they'd something dangerous, or in the way the uncle's would smuggle some sweets to their nieces behind the parents back, smiling sheepishly while petting their heads.

He envied it as Scaramouche. Envied the way groups of people would burst in laughter when they united after a tiring day of work, drinking away their hearts content. Envied the way people throw themselves in front of danger because of their companions, and in the way they would proudly boast about friendship, telling silly stories to each other about their mishaps as kids, laughing under their breaths while they teased each other.

And he craved it as Wanderer, in the way lovers would hold hands and walk together back home, in the way they'd whisper secrets into the night, promises with ardent devotion and smile knowingly at each other. Craved the way they'd kiss under the moonlight, hiding from everything else, and the world would be none the wiser.

He craved these connections in a way he would never admit, not even for himself. He wanted to experience it, if only for a moment. To have a taste of how it feels, even if this thought was a dangerous one for a being such as him.

And as he states his vain philosophy about how the sentiment is a hoax, as fake as the stars above, you are quick to raise an eyebrow, looking him dead in the eyes.

"And you really believe what you're saying? You don't really think that, do you?"

Wanderer does not know what caught him off guard first. Your voice or the fact that you seemingly could see right through him. It was the first time of many to come, where you stupefied him into utter silence. After a few minutes, Wanderer came back to reality to see you already staring at him, a knowing smirk on your face, as the face he was giving you made it clear that you caught him head handed on his petty little lies.

Damned be you.

Wanderer could feel himself physically recoil and turn around like a coward, spewing an insult he can't remember over his breath, then leave, running away from you.

Which brings him to the present moment, where he is once again running away from your stare as he is sitting his head on your lap. Only, this time he can't physically get out (that's what he tells you anyway, but you both know he could simply pull you away if Wanderer truly wished so).

"Hah, look into my eyes, you scaredy cat."

He couldn't, Wanderer had the impression he would go blind looking at you. So, so angel like you are, the rays of light shining upon you making you look completely ethereal on his eyes. Wanderer couldn't gaze upon you when you were this pretty. Not without losing some control of himself, anyways.

"The audacity to even utter those words. Do I have to remember you that you were the one who dragged me all the way over here?"

The small snort just bellow your breath, the way you covered your mouth to impede him to see the sure rapidly forming smile, everything you did was so lovely on his eyes.

"You and I know that if this was the case, I would've gone flying far away from you in some ditch quite a while ago."

"I just can't be bothered with you humans and your silly rituals. What is the point to come here and 'pass some time together' at all, if you won't even say anything?"

"You're not making any sense. Besides, it was you the one who said it was pathetic to make small talk just to fill up the silence."

The purple haired boy only clicked his tongue in faux distaste at that, his head moving to face you as soon as your hand cupped his cheek.

He didn't want to admit that he likes hearing you talk.

Wanderer knew exactly what the form of love was, having been chasing after it for so long, so desperately in all hundred of years he've been living on this cage masked as land. That's why he couldn't help but think, that as your soft lips touches his, you can only be love incarnate. That you're love itself.

He knows it, he feels it.

Felt in the way you called for his name, the name you gave to him. Felt in the way you'd kiss him so delicately, as if he would break, as if he was fragile. In the way you'd hold him under the warm beams of the sun, close to your chest, and let him hear your heartbeat. Or in the way you would brush off his hair out of his forehead, tracing imaginary letters and circles on his skin when you thought he was asleep. Felt the way you yearned for him, and he couldn't say it didn't felt like he was waiting for you his whole life.

But he was, even if he didn't know it before.

Because Wanderer craves love,

And you are love.

Therefore Wanderer craves you,

Wanderer loves you.

So he prays, for the first time. To any entity, to any god above. He prays and begs that you'd stay by his side just a little longer, just a little further. That your time with him wouldn't be over yet. He doesn't want this ephemeral moments with you to ever end. When he's with you, it feels like time is akin a butterfly with fluttering wings, something that can slip away from his grasp at any given time. It's wings so fragile, they can torn and break like glass cracking as soon as it hits the ground, quickly followed by it's own pieces scattering all over the place.

"Please." He pleads to no one in particular, holding your body close to his, grounding himself in the warmth that still emanates from your lying form, the fragile look on his clear amethyst eyes almost seems to be shivering, his voice betraying his emotions.

"Just a while longer. Just a bit more." He whispers reverently, feverishly trying to avoid the inevitable. If before he couldn't look at you up close because of how bright you were, now he can't rip his eyes away, trying to protect the trembling light between his fingertips.

"Don't go, never leave. Stay here, love."

[@rivkadreamer on Tumblr, please do not steal my works.]

[r0ttenhearts]

wasted on you |||

idol scaramouche x reader

part Ii

“ohmygosh, have you heard 4nemo’s new single?

“it’s sooo good (y/n!) you have to listen to it.”

“who’s your favorite one? mine would have to be scaramouche.”

your smile would always falter at the mention of his name. not like your friends ever knew you were acquaintanced with the idol group. “i don’t really like idol stuff, it’s not my thing.” you would always brush them off, refusing to take one of their earbuds to listen to the songs they wanted to show you.

hearing scaramouche’s voice again wouldn’t help you, not when you’ve gotten this far. not when you’ve moved on from him.

with college exams over and the end of your final year coming to a close you found yourself with nothing but time. with time came too many thoughts that would tumble around in your mind. too many what if’s and what could have been’s had plagued your mind since leaving scaramouche there backstage.

leaving him was so difficult, but being without him felt harder. you couldn’t help but sigh, now sitting alone in your room as the memories came back to you.

memories of splitting popsicles with him, after rehearsal drinks with his friends, smoking in a field together one of the rare times he was free from his filled schedule.

sometimes you couldn’t help but miss it. but then came the.. not so pleasant memories. the tears, the sore throat after screaming at each other, the way he’d always leave after an argument.

“please, scara! i just want you here with me. just this once. it’s been three years. give me this at least, please. i haven’t seen you in so long.”

remembering your own pleads to him never failed to make your heart ache. it still felt as if there was something unresolved, even after giving him his engagement ring back.

“i don’t wanna fucking see you (y/n)! id rather spend time with my friends doing something i enjoy than wasting my time with you.”

here comes the waterworks. tears would prick in the corners of your eyes when you remembered his tone that day. that angry look on his face.. he never looked so bothered before. it scared you so much that you still remembered it now, two years later.

it was strange seeing him on billboards and ads all across town and even on your own phone. in contrast to the angry glare he held for you, but an indifferent look to the public. would he still look at you that way? or would he look at you the same way he would everyone else?

curiosity got the best of you as you tapped on your phone, looking up his profile on instagram. there he was, looking the same as ever. maybe a little thinner but he still looked as beautiful as the day you left him.

a small smile graced your lips for a moment before it fell, seeing how much fun he had been having with his friends. you still kept in contact with kazuha, but never bothered to ask about him. you both knew it wouldn’t be good for you, so it was an unspoken rule.

“at least he’s doing well..” you mumbled to yourself before shutting off your phone. groaning internally, you knew this was a problem you had to deal with. this constant turmoil inside your head.

you decided you’d put an end to this. once and for all. you thought up a plan before texting kazuha, telling him what you wanted to resolve. despite his gentle warnings you wouldn’t listen. you just had to get through to him! make him understand your reasoning.

eventually kazuha gave in, and now you were standing in the pit to one of their concerts. it made you feel queasy remembering the last time you attended one. with your head hung low you waited for the group to start, they were opening for another up and coming idol group. it almost made you smile seeing scaramouche walk on stage with that glittery white outfit. the same glare on his features as before. he didn’t change, did he?

that sentiment making anxiety well up inside of you. you didn’t know how he would take it. seeing you again after so long. but you didn’t want him to know you were there to begin with, so you hid away from view, angled at a way that you could still watch them perform.

watching them now reminded you of one of the first concerts you ever went to of theirs, thanks to scaramouche getting tickets for you. that feeling of bubbling excitement and anxiousness when they were still so early in their career. you used to genuinely hope that they would make it, and they did!

his singing was stronger than it used to be, voice full of emotions as his eyes were fixated on the mic. a part of you missed this. coming to his shows, watching him give his all to the crowd of people that came just to see him and his friends.

as the group left the stage you sent a text to kazuha, walking away from the crowd and to the meeting spot he had told you about. it wasn’t like you didn’t already know where they were going, they always went to the same bar after every performance.

pushing open the grimy doors to the bar, you could see his back as you walked in. scaramouche was sitting at a table with his friends, drink in hand already as you walked up to them. you pulled out a seat next to scaramouche, crossing your arms over your chest as the guys looked at you excitedly, scaramouche not sharing the same sentiment.

“hey guys, long time no see.” heizou laughed loudly, patting scaramouche on his shoulder as they left the table. now it was just you and scaramouche.

he held this look of shock on his face, like he’d seen a ghost. his mouth slightly opening and closing, almost like a fish.

“hey.” you said softly, putting your hand on his arm. “are you real?” he asked you, now looking directly at you rather than trying not to meeting your gaze.

“of course i am, what do you mean by that? have you been dreaming about me too?” you ask, half joking but half serious as he had been plaguing your dreams for the past few months.

“don’t say things like that (y/n)..” he spoke quietly, taking a sip of his beer. you nod silently, watching him take a sip of his drink.

“i know, this is kind of weird. especially since i’m the one that left you but, it’s been haunting me. and i just want to talk.” you admit to him, looking down at your hands. suddenly your nails seemed much more interesting than to look at him.

“yeah, i think we’re due for that.” he said before sliding his drink over, taking your hands in his without warning. “look, (y/n). i know that back then i wasn’t great to you, far from it actually. i’ve thought about what you said to me that night ever since. i’m not asking for your forgiveness, nor am i asking you to get back together with me. but i just want you to know that i’m sorry. i regret wasting us, wasting what we had. i do love being an idol, but it doesn’t give me the same satisfaction as i got when i was with you.”

you nodded silently at his words, looping your arms around his neck as you hugged him. the words you had longed to hear were now finally being said. “that’s all i wanted.” you spoke quietly in his ear, your voice cracking with tears. “i just wanted that from you scara.”

you wiped your tears away as you pulled back, taking one of his hands in both of yours. “i want to be in your life again, not as lovers, not yet. but as friends. i’ve missed you all this time.” scaramouche nodded, taking his free hand and placing it on top of yours. “i can work with that.”

what you both didn’t see were the rest of the boys from 4nemo watching the scene unfold from the bar window. heizou’s loud cheering being shushed by xiao as both of your heads whipped to the window, red covering your faces in embarrassment.

taglist: @lemons4u @foxkunwoof @s-h-i-r-o-8-1 @felixilations @kaxukaxu @angelofdarkness2 @trxshhsstufftatsumimiko @ycugtf @nervouseaglelover @whorerificstuff @samarill

[morkanslily]

the wretched doll and his foolish tears

i love him very much. he is the father, son, and the holy spirit AMEN

Is it not amusing? To be born a question with no answer— A wandering puzzle piece in a void, yet to have any meaning until you find where you belong.

[cloudseeker14]

Late Spring (Scaramouche x GN!Reader)

Pairing : Scaramouche x GenderNeutral!Reader

Summary: The Balladeer's heart had always been a closed door but you'd managed to throw it open. Your love, though he never knew how to return it, was like warm sunlight kissing his skin. Yet, good things never last, do they?

Love. 

A word that shook the heart of every creature with tumultuous yearning, the subject of bards in every drinking den across Teyvat. 

Scaramouche could only scoff at the ridiculous notion. Love could never be true, not within the boundaries of a wretched, heartless world where emotions were a source of disdain. 

Not in a realm where his tears meant being cast aside, a creature as noble as him was supposed to be as steadfast as the mountains that slumbered in stone. 

Especially not in a world where you couldn’t exist. 

Scaramouche downed a bottle of whiskey, leaning against the headrest of his velvet armchair as he relished the burning sensation of the drink running down his throat. 

The stinging tethered him to this pathetic plane of existence, fastening the strings of his limbs to the earth as he attempted to fly away to the heavens. 

He could still remember that night, the wind had felt frigid on his porcelain skin as bonfires reached up to the sky. 

The fatui had been rejoicing, their hoarse cries of victory at the thought of another pesky obstacle in their path being tossed into oblivion. 

Yet, all he could see was you, all thoughts of merrymaking cast aside at the sight of your bright laughter. The sound of your joy had been a gentle breeze, blowing the cobwebs and opening the windows to sunlight in his heart. 

You’d drunk yourself to a slobbering mess, stumbling around as you jested with your peers. Scaramouche swirled his cup of cherry red wine, positively relishing the blush that coloured your face when you met his eyes.

After a couple of hours of painstaking formalities with the other harbingers, The Balladeer couldn’t help the groan that escaped from his throat as the gathering cleared,leaving him all alone with the stars and his mind.

His accursed mind, tormented with the sights of eras long gone.

He could practically see those cruel violet eyes in front of him, mercilessly casting him down from the heavens as he writhed in the air.

Scaramouche shuddered, breathing shakily, the silence penetrating the nooks of his heart.

Just as he was about to return to his quarters, he’d felt a tap on his shoulder.

The harbinger whirled around, only to be greeted by your charming face.

“I wouldn’t have come for this banquet if you were only going to keep staring at me.” You smiled, clasping his hands

If any other soul had done that simple action, it would have warranted instant death but what could Scaramouche say, in your hands he’d always been putty.

You stared at Scaramouche, eyes raking over the way the moonlight lit his porcelain features.

The way his clear blue eyes seemed to hold the depth of all the oceans of Teyvat itself.

The way that soft smile making its way into the corners of his lips had your heart bursting into flames.

“I missed you.” He muttered

“Hmm, what was that again?” You smirked, snaking your arm around his waist

“Don’t test me.” Scaramouche gritted, but the growing grin on his face said otherwise.

The two of you sat between the tall blades of grass, the birds chirped softy as a shooting star whizzed past.

“Did you see that!? Scaramouche, please tell me you saw it!” You cheered, your eyes practically about to fall from their sockets.

You were radiant, a source of such pure vividness that even someone as vile as him couldn’t shun away from.

“Yeah.” Scaramouche said, staring at you as he traced the lines of your palm. “It was the most beautiful thing I’d ever seen.”

Deep inside you both knew he didn’t mean the star.

“Y/N.” The harbinger called, gently laying his head on your shoulder.

You stiffened, your heartbeat echoing in your ears as his cold breaths fanned your neck.

“You’ll stay with me, right? Always?”

“Always.”

“Once I get that gnosis, you’ll have to be the one by my side,” He confessed, biting the inside of his cheek “It can never be anyone other than you.”

“Whether you have the gnosis or not makes no difference to me, but if it makes you happy, I’ll stay by your side as long as you want me to be there.”

Scaramouche could swear that a strange warmth seemed to blossom in his chest, but that would remain a thought for him to ponder during a freezing, lonely night.

You placed a chaste kiss on his forehead. “I love you.” You whispered

Scaramouche nodded, closing his eyes. What else could he say? How could a creature like him, a broken puppet with neither a heart nor strong will, be able to understand the intensity of your words?

You knew you would never hear it back but that was fine, it would just be a silent prayer you’d utter to him each day. You didn’t need that simple sentence to understand how he felt, as long as you could still see that gleam in his eyes when he looked at you, you knew you had nothing to worry about.

It was love, Scaramouche just hadn’t understood it yet.

—

With you in his life, Scaramouche knew he was invincible, nothing could stop him anymore. 

He was no longer that fragile creature, sobbing and wailing, he was going to be a god.

The gnosis was so close to falling within his grasp that Scaramouche could practically taste victory on the tip of his tongue. 

Yet, all those thoughts fell apart into dust fluttering in the wind at the sight of you on the ground, your skin devoid of it’s warmth. 

Hair clung to forehead, drenched in blood as you pitifully covered the gaping hole in your stomach. 

“S-scaramouche,“ You called, feebly reaching for the man you were bound to leave 

“Who did this to you!?“ Scaramouche bellowed, cupping your face

A whimper escaped his lips at the coldness of your body and with every second that passed, Scaramouche swore he could see the light fading from your eyes.

“I-I’m sorry I couldn’t make it through.“ You felt warm tears falling upon your arm and you forced yourself to look at Scaramouche, the bottom of your lip trembling as the harbinger stifled his sobs. 

“I won’t let you die!“ He bellowed, tightening his grip on you. You weakly shook your head as your vision blurred. 

“I love you, Scaramouche. D-don’t forget me.“

No. 

No. 

It couldn’t be you. 

Another betrayal, another mar upon his frivolous existence. 

You grasped his arm tightly, hopelessly trying to hold on to the last embers of life within you just to not leave the man before you ablaze in rage. 

But alas, the archons had other plans, and you shut your eyes; blissfulness washing over you. 

Scaramouche would have followed you to the ends of the world but at that moment, you’d slipped away to a paradise he’d never be able to reach. 

“I love you too."

Those were the words that escaped Scaramouche’s lips, only to be heard by the stars. 

He knew what love meant now. 

It was you. 

It was your touch, the comfort you'd ushered him into.

It was the web of passion he had allowed himself to be foolishly woven into.

You, the one who’d made him have a heart by giving yours even though he’d done nothing to deserve such a boon. 

Scaramouche couldn’t help but bawl your name, the wind carrying the puppet’s rage across Teyvat and to the archons. 

The world shouldn't be the same without you, it should have been torn apart in flames that should tower the mightiest pantheon, stifling every creature with smoke.

A world without you had no right to have even a glimmer of beauty.

Scaramouche remained rooted in place, the facade of the ruthless harbinger shattering into pieces, leaving only a wailing child stuck in the body of a man crying for the loss of his only salvation.

[supernova25]

Can't Love You Anymore

a/n: this was pretty long hehe rbs are much appreciated !

c/w: angst, ooc? idk i always put this just in case | word count . . 575

masterlist

Your phone rang, it was from Scaramouche. “Hello?” you say, “Hello? [Name]? I’ll be home late, I have to finish up a few things” he says. He’s a liar, you can hear music, he’s most likely at a club, he was slurring his words too. “Oh, okay, get home safe” you say, hanging up the phone.

You were sick of this. It wasnt the first time, it wasn’t the first time he came home late, reeking of alcohol. When he was home however, he didn’t really pay attention to you. You loved him so much, too much. You loved him too much, which is why you’re putting up with this. But you aren’t sure how much more of this you could take. You loved him, but you werent sure if he loved you back.

It wasnt always like this, he used to be so loving with you. Although he wasnt fond of saying ‘I love you’ he was fond of giving you gifts, showing his love for you. He spent all of his free time with you. Now, its different, he rarely spends time with you, rarely gives you any attention, rarely gives you any gifts. He used to look at you with so much love. Now, he looks at you with those cold eyes, you hated it, but you put up with it, because you love him.

Could you really put up with any more of this? 

The next day, you wake up with his side of the bed empty. He used to be there every morning. Greeting you good morning. If he had to leave early he leaves a note. You checked the bedside table if there was a note, getting your hopes up. Alas, there was none.

Maybe it was time to finally let go.

To your surprise, he was downstairs. “Good morning” you say, wrapping your arms around him. “Morning” he says before pushing you away, not even looking at you. “No work today?” you ask, “No, my shift just starts later than usual. I’m going to get ready now” He says, going upstairs.

Are you tired of me now?

He’s on his way home. You couldn’t take it anymore, so you decided to call him. 

“Hello? Where are you?” you say, mustering up all your courage.

“In a taxi, you?” he says.

“Home.” you reply.

"I’m almost home” you’re surprised he hasnt hung up the phone yet.

“I’m sorry” sorry? Why is he saying sorry?

“For what” you say, knowing what he’s sorry for.

“Just… everything” you can hear him sigh on the other end.

You recall all the times he’s made you feel loved. Based on how he’s talking it seems like he’s had a long day, was now really the best time? The happiness you received from him was just a mere memory. You can’t even remember the last time you two stayed in the same room for longer than 5 minutes.

Everything was also so awkward with you two, tension hanging in the air. You two were growing distant, it’s too late to fix it even if you tried.

“Just come home” you reply.

You think for a bit before speaking again.

“Hey… Nevermind” Are you sure? You still love him, of course. You don’t want to end things. But what about him? Does he still love you? Does he even care about your relationship?

“What is it?” he says.

“I don’t think we’re in love anymore”

[azaleaaxolotl1]

When Get Into An Argument With Them

Characters: Scaramouche & Kaeya

Warning: Angst to fluff, slight mentions of not eating and overworking in Kaeya’s part, mentions of blood and injuries in both parts, Scara is soft, and cursing, that’s all! Enjoy!

Summary for Scaramouche Part: Scaramouche was off doing his Harbinger duties, while you were also at work doing your business. You come home per usual, always wanting to see Scaramouche’s face, you never did recently. When he came home, you gave him an earful, to which he only responded with his side of the story.

“I try my hardest to please you! You don’t think I want a bit of affection after a little while!” I yelled. I was starting to get stressed and angry. I can taste the acid in my mouth now from my stomach.

“And what do you think I’m doing? Nothing?! I have duties to fulfill! I am a fucking Harbinger for Archon's sake! When will you ever understand that!” Scaramouche yelled, with anger coming out, getting more louder after each word.

Your banter and his went back and forth with each other. This went on for a long time. And Scara had enough of it.

Instead, of releasing all his anger out on you, he went outside, for your well-being.

There, you stood by yourself, in the middle of the room, where the unexpected event took place, you were now standing alone. You hadn’t even realized the tears running down your face.

You put your hand toward your cheek and felt the wetness from your tear, which made you cry even more.

You went to your shared room, went to bed, and cried yourself to sleep.

—

The next day came around, you woke with heavy eyes and a pounding headache from last night. You turned around to see that Scaramouche wasn’t there. You lifted the cover to find any wrinkles on the sheet to see if someone was sleeping next to you.

Nothing, only a few wrinkles, but it gave you a clue that Scaramouche didn’t sleep with you like he usually did. (Not in a sexual manner)

You hurriedly did your morning routine, such as showering, brushing your teeth, etc.

Once you were finished, you went downstairs and looked around. You didn’t see Scaramouche at all. Not even in the kitchen or

the shower.

‘He didn’t come home.’ You thought to yourself.

The thought of it almost made you start crying again.

You made your breakfast rather quickly and left the house in a hurry.

You also worked for the Fatui and knew the hardships of working in the organization. But, —from the rumors you heard— you thought being a Harbinger wasn’t quite hard of a job, the more you progressed in the job, you got a higher rank, which cause a heavy load of work to be shoved off your shoulders.

You showed up to work and saw many people. They all funnily looked at you but you shook it off. You continued your work routine like you did almost every day and sooner or later, the sun was going down.

You were looking at the sunset out the window. In your daze, you hadn’t heard someone call out your name until they tapped you on your shoulder.

You jumped slightly by the sudden scare.

“Hey, Y/n. Is everything alright?” They said.

You recognized the voice instantly and turned around to face them.

“Hey Childe, and yes, I am… alright.” You hesitated to say the last word because you knew you weren’t alright. Your s/o didn’t come home last night and you were worried.

You both stayed silent for a few minutes until you decided to ask the burning question that was eating you on the inside ever since this conversation started.

“Have you seen Scaramouche today?” You asked.

“Um- yes, I have. He’s in his office. He has been cramped in there all day, even last night.” Childe said, with ease, not knowing the event that had been placed last night.

“Thank you, Childe.” You said, bowing down. You walked away from the conversation, but before you can head off, Childe grabbed your wrist.

“He’s in a bad mood, be careful.” He said, looking at the floor.

“I see, thank you for your concern.” You said, releasing from his grip and walking off to Scaramouche’s office.

You approached his door. Taking in a deep breath and sighing back out. You knocked once and had no answer, you then opened the door.

You saw Scaramouche’s head on his desk, he was sleeping. His hat is on the side of his desk.

You slowly and carefully tiptoed to him.

You were now close enough to him to see his face.

You saw redness at the side of his right eye, which indicated that he was crying a lot, the redness from crying, spread to a tiny piece under his eye, mixing in with the blackish-brownish color underneath his eye. You still saw tears coming out of his eyes, but he was sound asleep.

You hesitantly reached out your hand to feel his cheek and felt the cold flesh along with the wet stains on Scara’s cheek that burned your fingertips. What burned, even more, was the way the tears dropped and collided with your hand.

He started to wake up due to the sudden contact. He rubbed his eyes and saw you in his vision. “Y/n, is that you?” He said, his breath a little shaky and leaning into your touch. “Shhhh, yes, it’s me.” You said, quietly.

Just by those few words, he stood up and pulled you in by your waist, engulfing your elegant scent. He nuzzled his neck into yours.

You stroked his back.

“I’m sorry, Scara. For saying those things to you. I was being selfish.” You said, in a calm and quiet tone. He raised his head.

“No you weren’t, as much as I hate to say this, you’re right. You have every right to be mad at me, but don’t you ever fucking dare to yell at me again, that’s my job.” He said, going back into his previous position.

You hugged him and staying that position for a couple of minutes before he retracted.

You gave him a warm smile. He couldn’t resist any longer and went down to kiss you. You were surprised since you would be the first to initiate a kiss between you two.

You melted into his kiss. You felt the love in the kiss, not something that was fake.

Pure love.

You wanted nothing more. You fell in love with him, and he fell harder.

Summary for Kaeya: You and Kaeya got into an argument about his flirtatious side. He said some nasty comments, saying how he was not the problem but you were. He said that when you were in the battle, you weren’t strong enough, which causes him to do all the work. You did not let that slide.

“Oh come on! Do you think I’m the problem, Y/n? I do all of the work, when you just sit there, acting like I’m just your servant. You have some nerve to come at me, saying I’m too flirtatious, oh give me a break!” Kaeya said, with pure anger in his voice.

You took a step back. You looked like you were in shock. You needed to think of something to

come back at him, but you thought of nothing.

You lowered your head.

Kaeya was smirking due to his win in the argument.

“Do better.”

That was your end game. You started bursting into tears on the spot. You were too embarrassed, so you ran off into your shared bedroom and locked yourself in there. Leaving Kaeya there, standing with both hands in his pocket which signaled that he fucked up.

But Kaeya didn’t want to do anything about what he just caused. He is egotistical!

So instead of giving you cuddles and kisses, with an apology every few seconds, he turned on his heels and went to the Knights of Favonius Headquarters, fulfilling his Cavalry Captain duties.

—

You woke up feeling like a mess, with a huge headache that felt like you drank too much last night. You moved your hands to feel the bags underneath your eyes. It felt swollen like you just got stung by a bee.

You walked into the bathroom and saw the mess in front of you.

Your hair was all over the place, you could see every single strand. Your eyes were red from crying. Your mouth is bruised from holding back the sobs. Your cheeks are wet and cold.

You were truly a letdown.

A disgrace to everyone.

You did everything you normally did in the morning.

You went back into the bathroom to check yourself out and you looked ten times better, doesn’t even look like you have been crying all night.

You put your hair in a high ponytail and had your bangs resting out.

You walked downstairs to see that Kaeya was not there.

‘He probably went to work.’

You grabbed your sword and walked out without making any breakfast.

‘Making breakfast is a waste of time, I need to train.” You thought

—

This is my last commission to do. You were asked to clear out a small hillichurl camp nearby.

You did everything with ease. You defeated them all.

While you were in Mondstadt city you were starting to feel a bit dizzy. You shook your head to pass off the pain and it worked.

‘Maybe I’ll do one more commission.’ You thought to yourself, repeating the same thing you said an hour ago.

You took in as many requests as possible. From defeating monsters to dropping off packages.

You were overworking yourself, feeling the same,

Dizzy.

Just..

1.

Another..

2.

Commission…

3.

Bam.

You hit the ground in front of angel share, going to grab a drink.

—

You woke up with a huge headache, wait, is this Deja Vu?

You looked around, trying to regain sight.

Once you did, you saw Lisa and Jean standing next to each other, Amber in her thoughts, Barbara healing you, and finally, the man himself,

Kaeya.

He was holding your hand as tight as possible.

“They should be okay now, and waking up any second,” Barbara said, with a worried tone.

“Do you know why they blacked out?” Amber said.

“They were overworking themself, way harder than all of you combined. And they didn’t eat at all. As crazy as it seems, they still took it like a champ, everyone came to their aid and brought them here.” Barbara said, straightforward.

Kaeya looked up at Barbara, not realizing you were awake.

You shut your eyes because you didn’t want anyone to see you were awake.

I mean, Jean and Lisa saw but didn’t say anything because they too, wanted to listen to what Kaeya was going to say.

“They were overworking… themself? And was not eating?” He said, squeezing your hand tighter, tighter than possible.

A tear ran down his cheek and everyone noticed.

‘Kaeya, are you alright?” Jean asked.

“This was all my fault. Y/n and I got into a serious argument and I said some… words I don’t want to repeat. I guess they got to their head. What was I thinking?” Kaeya said, crying even more.

You decided to stop pretending to sleep. You opened your eyes carefully though.

“Mmm, Kaeya?” You said.

He shot his head up and embraced you in a bear hug.

“We should go,” Lisa said, dragging everyone out.

They left and Kaeya then straddled you, his face resting in the crook of your neck.

“I’m sorry.” He said, kissing your neck.

He became a broken record. Repeating ‘I’m sorry’ with a kiss.

He then looked into your eyes.

“I’m sorry, I didn’t mean for you to get hurt, this was the last thing I never wanted to happen. I didn’t mean to lose my cool, I just was frustrated, and- and I wasn’t thinking straight. I was being a total… a total dickhead. I understand if you don’t want to be with me anymore, I wouldn’t either. I’ll understand-

“I love you.”

“Completely. Everyth-… what?”

“I said I love you, Kaeya, and I will never stop loving you. Of course, we will a few arguments here and there, but we can work them out. We just need to communicate. Please.” You said.

“Oh, archons.” He said, crying even more. You don’t know if they were happy tears or sad tears, maybe both.

You felt weak though.

“Kaeya…”

“Yeah?”

“Can you please get off me now? I know this is supposed to be a loving situation but, it’s getting hard to breath and it’s hurting me more.”

“Ah, right. As I will.” He said, getting off top of you and sitting back into his chair.

“When we get home, I am making you every recipe I know into food, I never want to hear again you’re not eating, you hear me?” Kaeya said, in a stern voice.

“Aye Aye, Captain.”

You both started laughing.

“I love you too, Y/n. More than you do. Than anyone. To Celestia and back, a couple hundred times.”

After Kaeya said that, he went in to kiss you and you gladly accepted. Although after a few seconds, you couldn’t breathe so you pushed him off.

“Water.” You coughed out.

“Oh right, I forgot. Don’t tell Barbara.” Kaeya said, laughing.

No matter how angry you two would get at each other, you both solved them out, which made your love for each other…

Unbreakable.

Would you guys like to see some on Wattpad or more of these one-shots?

Please request! It would help me a lot and would let me know what you all prefer.