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the-seas-song · 3 years

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Richard Armitage and Astrology

Hi! I find astrology fascinating, and am an armchair expert on it myself, so I found Richard's comments in his recent Total Film Magazine interview very interesting. This is what he said:

I’ve been incredibly lucky. I’ve dabbled with having my celestial chart looked at every couple of years, just for a little tune-up. Every time, the guy sighs, and goes, “What can I say? You’ve just got a sprinkle of luck.” And I say, “That’s good, because I don’t have the talent, so I really need the luck!”

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There is a naughty, dark side to me. I am quite strongly affected by the moon. So if there’s a full moon I’ll go a bit crazy. (source)

This isn't the first time Richard's mentioned astrology – he's mentioned being a Leo, reading his daily horoscope, and finding out he was born in the Chinese Year of the Pig; but these were all informal twitter comments. He has also mentioned the effect the moon has on him before, in February 2020:

“Everyone has cycles of positive mental and emotional feelings and negative mental and emotional feelings and I know that I am profoundly affected on a monthly cycle. I always look at the calendar when I'm feeling particularly low and check the lunar cycle to see if it's a full or new moon.” (source)

However, what prompted me to write this is that Richard's personal put-downs were even more direct here than usual; and the connection that has to his natal, or birth, chart.

A little disclaimer: Personally, I think general horoscopes (like the ones you find in magazines) do far more harm than good. They are based solely on the twelve sun signs, and your sun sign is just one puzzle piece out of 25+ pieces that make up your natal chart. This is why many people don't relate to their horoscope or it's personality description.

Your natal chart, however, is a whole different animal. It's an intricate puzzle created by the exact date, time, and location you were born; which is why most people find their natal charts to be scarily accurate.

Back during the Hobbit days, a fan blog reported that Richard told a NZ fan that his birth time was just after 4 a.m. I used 4:05 for this post, and being off by a few minutes doesn't really make a difference.

Richard and self-esteem

I really feel for and relate to Richard's self-esteem struggles, because our charts mirror each other. We are both Leo suns; but I have my moon in Aries with my MC and Chiron conjunct each other in Virgo and sextile my North Node; while Richard has his moon in Virgo with his MC and Chiron conjunct each other in Aries and sextile his North Node.

What on earth does that mean?

Each planet represents a different part of you. The sun represents your ego/conscious self; the moon your emotions, mercury your mind/intellect, venus love and beauty/aesthetics, mars passion and drive, etc.

On top of the twelve planets, there are specific points and asteroids that are also important. Your MC, or Midheaven, represents your career and public persona. Your North Node describes your inner journey and life purpose. The asteroid Chiron describes your major soul wound, that you will be forced to deal with throughout your life.

A conjunction and a sextile are two of several different kinds of aspects. The different kinds of aspects are the different ways your respective puzzle pieces can interact with each other. Some are 'easy/positive' and some 'difficult/negative'. A sextile is considered easy/positive. A conjunction means two things are next to each other and overlap with one another, and is usually considered positive.

Leo and Aries are both fire signs. Fire signs are generally playful, warm, passionate, confident, and optimistic. Virgo is an earth sign. Earth signs are generally practical, grounded, sensual, and logical.

Richard's personality is dominated by an almost equal amount of Leo and Virgo influence, with both his sun (core self) and venus (love and beauty) in Leo and his moon (emotions) and mercury (mind) in Virgo.

Aries and Virgo are said to be the most difficult Chiron signs, because they are the wounds tied directly to your self-worth (Aries is the wound of Self and Virgo is the wound of Perfection). With Aries Chiron you feel a core sense of worthlessness, like you're missing a fundamental piece of your core self. This deeply felt lack of self-worth leads people to be people pleasers and have issues with confrontation and conflict.

Aries rules the planet mars. It is the warrior planet of passion, drive, and combat. A conventional Aries is confident, outgoing, impulsive, and strong willed. Aries and mars are definitely the rowdiest sign and planet in the zodiac. However, with Chiron here the traits are inverted, and so someone like Richard is much more likely to be scared of his inner passion, confidence, and willpower – depending, of course, on what the rest of his chart is like.

That leads us to Virgo. Chiron Virgo feels impure, like there is something fundamentally wrong with them. This kind of low self-esteem makes you feel like you have to constantly try to 'fix' yourself so people will love and accept you. It's an OCD type of perfectionism that only ends in failure and heartbreak.

A good example of how this works is when I talked to my therapist recently. I hadn't quite succeeded in meeting my goals, and so my automatic response was to condemn myself for failing. My therapists immediate response was to congratulate me on how much progress I had made.

Ironically, unlike with Aries, this isn't an inversion of the conventional Virgo. Conventional Virgo is meticulous, detail-oriented, focused, patient, efficient, practical, perfectionistic, systematic, and pessimistic with high expectations. If Aries is the official warrior of the zodiac, Virgo is the official nit-picker.

This means that Richard's subconscious intellectually (mercury) and emotionally (moon) expects and demands perfection, whilst simultaneously feeling fundamentally worthless. In short: ouch.

Interestingly, a significant number of celebrities have their Chiron conjunct their MC. Personally, I think Richard hit the nail on the head as to why in his essay on the Human Condition for Cybersmile:

The answer in my humble opinion, (and believe me it is humble, to a point of taking 43 years to be shared) is actually something which applies to my work as an actor. It’s why sometimes actors are called in to work with therapists, in large corporations, in schools. It’s why drama therapy is fantastic to understand what we do, how we do it and what the outcome might be, and in an improvisation where we aren’t playing ourselves sometimes we explore avenues that are too frightening or unacceptable in our own lives.

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So going back to my very first point, the “social media society” in which we’d all like to feel safe, supported, excited, creative, spontaneous, innovative, courageous, is really in our own hands. And back to acting, it’s taken me a long time to shake off the effects of bullying in school. That people were always laughing behind my back. I was always looking out of the corner of my eye. I now have incredible peripheral vision which is so useful, (as is Kinesthetic sense…Google it) but try being a brave, experimental, uninhibited actor with all of those hang ups. Wasn’t happening.

So here is the thing, and it’s key to my work and I think ours as a community. When we speak or write, we ultimately desire to ‘affect’. If we aren’t watching the destination of that affect, then how do we know our words have landed and the ‘effect’ they have caused?

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If I have a strong opinion about something which I want to express I really task myself with backing it up with the ‘why do I feel that?’

Again it’s part of my work building a believable character, and actually part of building a believable ‘me’ outside of my work. Just.. “because that’s what I feel” is a bit of a cop out.

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As for Bullying, it’s like the moment the pot boils over, or it’s the poisoned stream that can’t be cleansed, so why bother. Well I think that’s what art is for. It’s can support the best and the worst of ourselves. We can ‘attack’ a canvas with black angry paint, we can ‘savage’ a piano keyboard, we can dance until we drop, we can read about a Puritan society who executed elders, we can explore the psychology of a serial killer, and when we can’t do this ourselves we can experience it, and witness it through others.

It’s more than being nice. Edward Munch’s “The Scream” is far from nice. Francisco Goya’s “Saturn” is horrific, Metallica, Die Antwoort etc etc. But then there is Monet, Faure, Renée Fleming, Peter Jackson, Ariana Grande (ok it’s getting a bit eclectic I admit) but when we look, listen and empathize, we tune in to the Human Condition.

We are all part of The Human Condition, whether we like it or not. Social Media. Expression. The Human Condition.

Us human beings are wired for emotion and connection. For actors, their career gives them a way to safely process and explore their personal wounds through the characters they play. For Richard in particular, his mars is conjunct his North Node. So, his mars and North Node are sextile his Chiron and MC.

Remember, Aries (the sign of Richard's Chiron and MC) is ruled by mars. Mars is the warrior planet, like Aries is the warrior sign. This means that Richard's spiritual journey/life's purpose (North Node) deals directly with healing his soul wound so he can accept and embrace his inner confidence and willpower. This explains why he ends up playing a lot of ultra-masculine characters – mars/Aries are the most macho of them all.

This isn't to say I think Richard should change who he is! I wouldn't be interested in him if he was ultra-masculine or macho. However, for his own sake, I would be overjoyed to see him gain more self-esteem and inner confidence.

Extrapolating from my own personal experiences, the constant criticism and judgement I received during my adolescence from my peers and various authority figures (like family members and teachers) for being unconventional and 'over the top' caused me to turn on myself and repress my passion and will-power for several years. I think it's highly likely that Richard experienced this too.

Here are some quotes from Richard that illustrate everything I've been talking about (emphasis is mine):

Armitage is still notably handsome, but, within minutes of meeting him, it’s apparent how incongruous it is that this bookish, sensitive, self-described ‘melancholic, philosophically-minded softie’ and ardent fan of The Great British Bake Off was cast as beefcake killer totty for a considerable part of his career. ‘It’s ridiculous. It’s the complete opposite to who I am. I’m such a pacifist,’ he laughs. ‘But then, part of me always felt: “Well, isn’t that why we’re actors?”

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'I think the turning point was losing my mum,” he says. “Up until that point, I felt like I mustn’t put a foot wrong, that if I said the wrong thing or revealed too much about my personal life, it could all come crashing down, and it would come down on my parents, and they wouldn’t be proud of me anymore.” He shrugs. “Now that I’m past that I’m actually much more carefree about the choices I make.” (source)

Richard Armitage puts his head in his hands and emits a noise that's somewhere between a sigh, a laugh and a groan. “Oh no! Why would you want to pin this up?” he says with a horrified whisper.

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Never has a man seemed more ill at ease with the heartthrob label. He squirms with embarrassment in his chair every time the subject comes up. He is grateful for the loyalty of his fans, he says, but worries that “there is this thing of, 'Is he just totty?' Because the industry will sometimes write you off as a serious actor if they think that. I have always been conscious of that and fought against it, because I don't really see myself like that at all.”

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This brings us back to Astrov, who looks so relentless towards the future that he can't see the truth in front of his eyes. “It's interesting that he's an outsider in the play. I've often felt like that myself in life. I'm quite a solitary person. I enjoy my time with me, and sometimes it's not necessarily healthy, because I can talk myself into quite a dark place.

I'm an optimist, but at the same time, there's a discipline in me that will attack me for not working hard enough, not achieving enough, not being good enough. You always think, 'I'll grow out of that. With success, those voices will disappear.' But they don't, they get louder. I suppose I'm learning a bit about myself through Astrov.” (source)

The answer in my humble opinion, (and believe me it is humble, to a point of taking 43 years to be shared) is actually something which applies to my work as an actor. … And back to acting, it’s taken me a long time to shake off the effects of bullying in school. That people were always laughing behind my back. I was always looking out of the corner of my eye. I now have incredible peripheral vision which is so useful, (as is Kinesthetic sense…Google it) but try being a brave, experimental, uninhibited actor with all of those hang ups. Wasn’t happening. (Human Condition essay)

So I kind of travelled on that line for a while, and I was bullied for it as well. The problem with me is that as soon as you try to push me down or say “you can’t do this” and “I don’t think you should do that”, I immediately push back. So I did – I’d decided really young that I was going to try to make a career out of it.

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Actually, there was something I wanted to add to what Shaun said, about inclusivity, is that um, no matter how – how much confidence you have or how, in my case, lack. Y’know, I always felt like a misfit, or an oddball, or that I didn’t belong. But I always – I always told myself that ‘you exist in the world, so therefore there’s a place for you in this industry’. I think anybody who feels like, “I can’t become an actor because…” – you exist. And, y’know, the job of filmmakers is to write about our life and society, and if you are a part of that, then there’s a place for you in the industry. (source)

I'm a bit of a brooder. I don't like confrontation, so I think I suppress things. When my temper does come out, it goes all the way – the kind of temper you can't apologize for. Yep, the chair getting thrown out of the window. Those emotions are scary, but hey, they come in useful when you're acting. (source)

Armitage is a noticeably calm presence but he talks with passion.

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In the past, he has described himself as a shy person. “Not any more,” he says forcefully. “I mean… if I’m very, very honest, I’m a big guy, I think I’m at times quite a frightening person.”

In what way?

“I think I’m quite uncompromising. I can’t bear bulls---. And in a way the shyness is me protecting other people from that. I can feel that there’s an intimidation that can happen if I own my full height, and speak at my full volume. So I’ve learned over the years to just tone it all down a bit.” (source)

I've become one of those actors who find it difficult to say no when things are offered. I think if I had come out of drama school and been an instant Hollywood superstar I would be taking long, leisurely holidays. But I always feel somehow it's going to be taken away from me so I work when I can. When you struggled with work as I did when I left drama school you make hay when the sun shines. There was a time when I thought, and my agent thought, it wasn't going to happen for me. We both sat down and I actually said I don't know if I can stay in this state. The interesting roles have only come since I got into my 30s. But I didn't know that was going to happen. I'm a bit of an all or nothing kind of guy. To be honest, I had no blind faith in myself. I don't think I could have stayed around as a jobbing actor. I would probably have quit. Who knows? I think I would have found that too frustrating. But at the moment when I thought I was going to quit, something happened and it all changed again. (source)

[talking about being cast in the Hobbit]

There was a little bit of guidance as to what they were looking for. I felt that I was too young for the character, too tall for that character, so I thought, you know, ‘I’ll just look at the scene they’ve written’. And then I realised the essence of the character that they were aiming for. So I went to meet Peter and Phillipa and we read some of the scenes. I think we spent an hour-and-a-half talking about the character and what their vision was, and I sort of explained who I thought he was, and that was it.

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Yeah, my first instinct, whenever that kind of thing happens, is to say, 'Well what's wrong with the part? Why did nobody else want it'? Which is kind of the story of my life really. When I get offered something, I'm like, 'Well there must be something wrong with it if they're offering it to me!'

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But you know, the thing is, you talk about all of this: ‘How did you get the role? And how did it feel when you got the role?’ And once all that’s died down you start to think, ‘I’ve actually got to go and play this now’. They’ve trusted me. Everyone’s happy, everyone’s celebrated, the phones have gone down and the deal’s been done. Now it’s over to me to make the role work. And that’s the scariest moment, because you do have that elation and then the work begins and you think, ‘How the hell am I going to do this?’ (source)

How was it for you taking on this beloved role, this character that has such a huge responsibilty on his back? Could you relate in some ways?

Richard Armitage: Yeah. There is always building within him this paranoia that he’s not a good enough leader, and that weighs him down. I have experienced that same feeling as an actor in this role. And I was aware of taking on the responsibility of that character, so there was something I could latch onto there, as one of the people who loved ‘The Hobbit’ book and had envisioned that character. It took me a while to be convinced that I could do it, it wasn’t until I saw some sketches, this one particular pencil sketch….there was something about this characters eyes and the way that his hands are crossed, I thought, “I think I can do this, I can pull this off.” (source)

Q: I wanted to ask you about what your Arkenstone is. For you personally.

A: Me personally?

Q: And I meant for this to be materialistic. What's the thing that you covet so much that it makes you mad that you don't have it?

A: Well, it's actually not material. It's not material, and it's – (laughs) You want a comedy answer, don't you? But it's respect. It's the thing that always eludes you, you know. You have to fight for it and when you get it, your arkenstone, the thing that crowns you, is respect.

Q: And also a sweater.

A: And a sweater. I do have this little natty number.

Q: It's a good one man.

A: Tom Ford made this personally. But hey, he can have it back. I don't covet wealth and material. (source)

Q6: You’ve done a variety of different roles, I wonder what influences you to pursue those roles?

R: More often than not, you go where you’re wanted. So getting hired is still kind of a revelation to me, a shock and a surprise. Sometimes you have very flat periods, where I don’t really care what comes next, I just want to work on something. I feel like I’ve got a little cloud of luck over my head so the right thing always seems to come along. But again, I’m easily excited about literature and stories, so I’ve always said I don’t really pursue glory, I’d happily do acting for two people in my living room if it was a role that I really enjoyed with a story I’d really like to tell. So it’s chance, I would say.

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Q8: Once in an interview about Thorin, you were asked what your arkenstone was and your answer was respect. I like this answer a lot. So I was wondering what’s your red dragon? As you said yesterday he’s a character who sheds his skin, improves, and becomes something. I was wondering if there was something you’d like to improve, become?

R: I guess the antithesis of that is disrespect. Do you mean in myself?

Q8: Yes.

R: Yeah I try not to be too disrespectful. I guess I value the truth. I think we’re living at a time at the moment where the truth is warped and there’s a word that’s been in my head for a long time, and particularly recently it’s come to the surface. When I was studying Macbeth, at the RSC, I read a long thesis about the gunpowder plot, which was one of the things they thought that Shakespeare (or whoever Shakespeare was) was stimulated by to write Macbeth. And the word equivocation was used in this thesis, it was actually about equivocation and what equivocation is. And if you look it up in the dictionary, at the moment most politicians are equivocating. When you don’t answer a question, or you bend the truth to make it seem like you are answering the question, and in fact you’re telling a lie. So I would say my red dragon would be equivocation.

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Then there was the physical form that I was studying and observing, but also, I do sometimes enjoy locking myself away in a room and reading a book or just doing something alone, and you sometimes can go a couple of days without speaking to anybody. I don’t know whether anyone else experiences this or whether I’m just a weirdo. But I find that when that happens my voice changes, and I always forget how to make a noise, I have to do a warm-up before I go into the world and start speaking again.

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Q15: I was wondering if you ever had to pull out of a project because it felt wrong or something, and what is the point where you say “nope I can’t do this”?

R: Um, no. But that’s partly to do with the fact that I have a lot of loyalty, probably too much loyalty for my own good, really, and there’ve been moment when I’ve been on board a project, and actually it happened this year with The Lodge, I was already on board that project and something else came along which was bigger and better and brighter and more money, and your agent says “look we can pull you out of The Lodge, they can probably recast it,” and here I think “I’ve already started this process, I don’t want to let people down,” and I don’t have a problem with that at all, I never have any regrets over the things that you miss or the things that you decide not to do, I think there’s a strong enough reason why you’ve decided not to do it, but in general no I haven’t ever pulled out of something. There was one television show I remember, I’m not going to say what it is, but after the first readthrough, I did call my agent and asked, “can I get out of this?” And then he quickly got back to me and said, “don’t do it. Don’t build a reputation built on disloyalty.” So I try not to.

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Q18: I think you are very handsome, but your character Francis hated the way he looked, how did that make you feel?

R: Francis hated the way he looked? Yeah. I guess there is something we relate to in that. Without getting too personal, I don’t always enjoy looking at myself in the mirror. I don’t do it very often, to be honest. I do it just to be sure I don’t have food on my face. I do it in character, actually. I do spend a bit of time studying my own face when I’m playing a character, which is interesting because your face does change. (source)

He cannot see the handsomeness: “I think I am odd-looking. I have big lines on my forehead.” I squint, looking for them, but he is talking over me, sounding slightly panicked. “I shouldn’t draw attention to it, because then everyone else will see the oddness.”

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Laziness is what makes him angry: “Laziness in myself. Laziness in other people. And dishonesty. All things I feel capable of myself. I have a propensity to be lazy and lie about it. Fear makes me rageful. There are words in The Crucible I actually find it quite hard to say.” I beg for an example — The Crucible is in the public domain. “No,” he says, “you’ll see it in the play.” I tell him it will make no sense in print if he will not tell me. But he won’t. So I change the subject. It works. “OK, I will give you a line.” He inflates a little and says: “Is there no good penitence but it be public?” And then: “Were I stone I would have cracked for shame this seven month.” (source)

Q: How would you describe your evolution as an actor since you started?

A: I think everything has to do with the fact that today I’m not afraid anymore. At first, I was embarrassed to do something wrong or do things badly or make myself ridiculous. Today, I am almost looking for opportunities to be ridiculous or vulnerable or to make as much of a mistake as possible. In a sense, it’s now the opposite of being undercover.

Q: Are you the actor you dreamed of being when you started?

A: Not yet. I am not yet fearless enough. It’s in waves, actually. But I have already approached this dream. There were moments, especially during Arthur Miller’s The Crucible, which I performed on stage, where I felt I had no control over things. That’s what I’m looking for: to lose control.

Q: You often play bad guys. What do you like in these characters?

A: I like disobedience. I like the fact that you can be disobedient thanks to your creativity. As a person, I must always be polite in life, be careful and correct so as not to hurt anyone. In a fantasy world, I can be as offensive as I want. It’s an outlet. (Laughter)

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Q: Many actors are moving to directing. Is this also your goal?

A: I would like to, but I do not think I’m smart enough. I am good when it comes to working with another’s vision. I do not think I have that creative spontaneity that creates a vision from scratch. But the future will tell. (source)

I applaud Richard for being so open and direct about his fears and insecurities. It takes a lot of bravery to do so. And while I've seen some fans get annoyed with his continual self-deprecation, I think his honesty and openness is much more significant, and shows his inner strength. He doesn't try to pretend to be someone he's not.

He recently described himself as “patient, obsessive, and silly” (source). The patient part is classic Virgo, and the obsessive part comes from an element of his natal chart that I have not mentioned.

The silly part, however, is classic Leo. Like I said above, he has an almost equal amount of Leo and Virgo in his personality. Personally, I'm proud to be a Leo, but I also know we get misunderstood a lot of the time. I wrote the following for an essay of mine on Leos in Disney:

Your sun sign represents your core identity. Just like the physical sun is the center of the solar system and its energy creates life, the astrological sun is our consciousness and life force. Each of the twelve sun signs are ruled by a different planet and element.

Since Leo is the fixed fire sign, we don't inherit the reckless and impulsive nature of fire, but instead are a steady flame. No sign is more reckless and impulsive than Aries, because they have the double combination of being a cardinal sign and a fire sign. Meanwhile, all four of the fixed signs struggle with stubbornness and admitting when their wrong.

Leo's are well known to be natural leaders and the rulers of the zodiac. We are ruled by the sun and our animal is the lion. We dream big and are born with big personalities, and we can't help but be theatrical and dramatic. This means we are always self-centered in the sense of being strong-willed and having a strong sense of self. It does not mean all Leos are egotistical.

Unhealthy Leo traits all revolve around the ego: attention-seeking, egotistical, selfish, bossy, controlling, pushy, jealous, possessive, lazy, vain, arrogant, aggressive, and obstinate.

Healthy Leos, however, are known for our fire-based traits – being animated, theatrical, happy, outgoing, independent, competitive, charismatic, creative, open-minded, open-hearted, confident, assertive, playful, warm, social, courageous, idealistic, affectionate, romantic, optimistic, and adventurous.

What isn't often talked about is our steadiness, our fixed-based traits. Leos are authentic, steadfast, fiercely loyal and protective, consistent, persistent, full-hearted, dedicated, need to do their best, generous and selfless, honorable and moral, genuine and direct, extremely supportive, hard-working and responsible, dignified, strong-willed, and ambitious and determined.

Something that is often mentioned but highly misunderstood is our trait of courage. Having courage doesn't mean you're fearless or reckless. The definition of courage is “the power or quality of dealing with or facing danger, fear, pain, etc.” It means that instead of running away from our problems or denying our emotions; healthy Leos face them and be genuine and direct with ourselves, embracing our vulnerability.

Having a big personality doesn't necessarily mean someone has a big ego. C.S. Lewis once said, “Humility is not thinking less of yourself, it's thinking of yourself less.” Leos have huge hearts and are incredibly generous. The sun never goes retrograde, always shines, and gives life and energy to all living beings – it isn't selective or discriminatory. Healthy Leos are like mini suns; which is why we are also irrepressibly upbeat, optimistic, and fun-loving.

We're not pushovers. We are like roses – we have both flower petals and thorns. If you mess with someone we love you're going down. We're too loyal and protective to let major things slide; and even if we forgive, we never forget. Little things? We'll try to work them out with you.

Being naturally strong-willed and assertive is healthy – it just means we usually make horrible subordinates and yes people. There's nothing wrong with having high standards and being open about them. In fact, in relationships it's far better in the long run to open and frank about what you need and what you consider a dealbreaker from the beginning.

And oh yes are we ambitious and competitive – but most often with ourselves. We're natural leaders who always dream and think big. For a healthy Leo it's not about being the best, but doing your best. We have to be grand and intense, we're ruled by the sun. It's all or nothing for us. Settling is not something a Leo does. We need to be the best leader, the best friend, the best partner, etc. that we possibly can.

Also, in astrology each sign rules a different body part, and Leo rules the heart and upper back.

Adding to this, Leos are known as the Kings/Queens of the zodiac not because we're egotistical, but because our sun sign is the sun. It's like a double amount sun. I could go into significantly more detail about this, but it involves a lot of technical astrological details; so if anyone wants to know more just message me!

Going back to Richard, having his core self (sun) and love/beauty (venus) in Leo explains why he is an actor and artist; and why he is often warm, silly, and dramatic when he feels comfortable – his long interview with The Anglophile Channel (and it's deleted scenes) does a great job of showing the synergy between his Leo and Virgo sides.

We see Richard express the heartfelt, generous, sincere, and honorable side of Leo all the time. This is why I'm sure he has the inner-confidence and strength hidden within him to overcome the deep pain his Chiron causes him (like it does to us all). I hope he continues to find projects and people that help him on his journey to heal.

Thank you for reading this, I'm wishing him and you all the best. Take care!

#Richard #Richard Armitage #Astrology #Mine

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wisteria-lodge · 4 years

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tentatively, double lion + bird secondary model

Hello hello! A small ask for you, because I like the way you words about sorting hat chats. You make lots of sense!

Thanks, @aqueenvictorious. I really like “words” used as a verb.

I've been trying to sort myself for years at this point, and my only conclusion so far is that though I adore my family and would cause destruction on their behalf if necessary, and though I feel vaguely protective of humanity as a whole... a loyalist I am not. But am I a bird or a lion?? I care passionately about some things (I just spent an hour crying because birds are starving to death because of profligate use of pesticides and I CAN'T FIX IT grargh) and I'm usually quick with a response or opinion... but I don't know that they come from me, internally, specifically?

So far I’m leaning Lion - having a response or opinion that you’re very sure of quickly is very Lion, and so is using your emotions to process issues.

I read a lot. All the time, about lots of things. It's not like I'm just deciding, not like it's an impulse, I just spend so much time flooding myself with data that of course I have and/or can formulate opinions quickly. But then... it doesn't feel like something I construct. I do, sometimes, as a conscious choice, seek out specific info so as to create an opinion about a specific topic, but I don't feel like I have an actively constructed morality.

@paint-the-ravenclaw is a Bird (I’m a Lion) who writes very, very well about what Bird Primary processing feels like from the inside. I love this post, and this other post. But I’m copy-pasting my absolute favorite comparison of these two modes of thinking here, because I think it might help you:

“A Lion’s moral compass is forged from their experiences. They process information in a much more organic, subconscious kind of way than Birds do. It’s sort of like… you know how machine learning algorithms work? You kind of just throw a bunch of data into a computer, give it some algebra to work with, and stir everything up until it spits out a conclusion and you don’t really know what happened in between. It doesn’t give you a step by step analysis. But the conclusions it shows up with can be scarily accurate.

Birds are more like… say, the Sorting Hat Chats quiz. I doubt it uses a machine learning algorithm; more likely it’s a points scoring system. If you had access to the code, you could see the underlying flowchart and the weight and values assigned to different questions and answers. You’d be able to tell what it was doing at each step. This kind of algorithm is less susceptible to random bias, but you have to be really confident in the way you’ve constructed the algorithm because you’re doing everything manually, and that gets WAY harder the more complex the issue is.”

I have a similar tangle with my secondaries, but I thiiiiink that boils down to "lion with strong bird model and a passionate jealousy of and longing to be a snake." Cause when the chips are down, I'm usually moving before I even have a chance to think, and flinging myself into the chaos. I have a bad habit of stopping problems with my body. Or getting tired of listening to people wrangle and just decide "fuck it im the smallest person in the room but I will just move the entire conference table MYSELF so this is OVER WITH."

I do see the Bird secondary model, for sure. But I must say, this is a very Lion-flavored ask. You hit me with a lot of emotion, a lot of intuition, like you just sat down and wrote whatever came to mind. No attempting to explain your logic, or your worldview, or giving me lists... which are things that I am coming to expect from my Bird asks.

Also, you give me very Revolutionary vibes, and that’s what I call the Double Lion archetype... that I suspect you are.

#sortinghatchats #sort me #wisteria sorts #double lion #lion primary #lion secondary #bird secondary model #bird primary vs lion primary

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gingerwritess · 5 years

Note

Hey there!! So I have 2 motives for dropping into your inbox! 1) (the more important one) YOURE SO AMAZING AND I LOVE YOUR WRITING AND YOURE JUST AWESOME. I hope you know that ❤️ aaaand 2) I know your requests are super full, so whenever you get to this is great, your writing is just so awesome and I wanted to ask if you’d be willing to do one with Loki and an insecure reader?? Anyways, hope you have a great week! Love ya!!!!

this is while you’re still kinda new to waking up next to loki. take that relationship status how you will ;)

ps thank you smsmsksjdjwhej sorry this took so long to answer!

* * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * *

“You’re really pissing me off.”

Loki cracks an eye open. “…I beg your pardon?”

Sighing, you backhand his chest and roll onto your stomach next to his sleeping form, staring down at him. “I said you’re pissing me off.”

“I’m…sorry…?”

“Why are you so goddamn perfect?”

A laugh catches in his throat—that scared him. God forbid you ever wake him up with those words one day and actually mean them.

“It’s infuriating,” you grumble, poking a finger into his cheek. “We just woke up, for pete’s sake, can’t you at least have morning breath?”

“…who is Pete?”

Annoying little perfect prick. You let out a groan and drop your head onto his perfect chest, bringing up a hand to rest over one of his perfectly chiseled pecs. “No one, it’s an expression.”

Strong arms wind around your shoulders and you wiggle around a bit to get comfortable, eliciting the tiniest of groans from your godly pillow.

“I’m just really sick ‘n tired of waking up to the literal definition of perfection every morning,” you sigh, drumming distracted fingers on his chest, “when I have to look like a moldy piece of trash every morning.”

His hair is never frizzy, always sleek and shiny and perfectly wavy and luscious—bed head who? You don’t think he even knows what snoring is, or what drool is, and he never has that foggy half-asleep messiness about him.

Whereas when you wake up, mirrors crack.

And you’re fairly certain you could kill a man just by breathing in his direction before brushing your teeth.

“You do not look like a moldy piece of trash,” Loki laughs, tilting his chin down to press a kiss to the top of your head.

“I do too. Why do you even kiss me in the mornings?”

“Must be something inconsequential, like I love you or something.”

You glance up at him with a scowl.

Fuck, even from this angle? Where are his double chins???

“Fine, I love you too, but seriously.” You nuzzle back into his chest, subconsciously trying to hide your face from his adoring gaze. “How can you even stand to-to…you know.” A wave at your face. “Look at me?”

Loki’s brow knits together. You can’t possibly be serious, with these ridiculous concerns about what you look like first thing in the morning, right?

Maybe he shouldn’t laugh, judging from your serious silence and nose squishing against his chest. His heart flutters; you’re trying to hide in his embrace again.

A cool thumb strokes over the soft skin of your shoulder, steady and reassuring. “No words could begin to describe your beauty, fair maiden.”

“Ha ha, very funny—”

“Shh, let me finish.” His chuckle rattles your head on his chest. “You are the most beautiful creature I have had the pleasure of seeing, and I’ve seen many, many worlds in my lifetime.”

“Yeah, yeah, you’re supposed to say that,” you groan, absentmindedly running your hand up and down his torso. “It’s like, your job to say that. That’s like when a grandma says you’re pretty, it doesn’t count.”

Caught up in your insecurities, you miss just how much Loki is squirming under your distracted hands.

“B-but I mean every word,” he swears through gritted teeth. “You are stunning, simply ethereal, a goddess—oh, fuck, darling…”

Your nails barely scraped over his nipple and you don’t even notice his cursing or how his body jolts under you, too busy trying to point out your flaws.

“My hair is awful, Loki, it’s a freakin’ birds nest in the morning, and I drool in my sleep—there, I said it—and my body’s all lumpy, I’ve got rolls and cellulite for days, and—Loki!!”

He’s on top of you now, knees on either side of you and pinning your wrists next to your head. “How dare you,” he breathes, chest rising and falling rapidly. “How dare you speak of yourself in such a way?”

“It-it’s true,” you squeak—his eyes are flashing as he scowls down at you, almost scarily. “I’m not good enough for you, mister perfect.”

“Right…” The fingers around your wrists tighten.“I am the perfect one, of course.”

Loki seals your mouth with a searing kiss, burning hot and angry, and when he pulls away with a pop seconds later, he looks…different.

His hair is curly, tangled, sticking up in weird places, crumpled with sleep and messy—you bite back a shocked giggle. The eyes normally so crisp and striking first thing in the morning seem tired, a little puffy with leftover sleep and crinkling beautifully at the corners as he smiles down at you.

Those perfect eyebrows of his aren’t precisely shaped, his lips a tiny bit chapped, and he smells faintly of cotton and sleep and…you.

You’ve never wanted to hug him more than you do now.

“Loki…you look like you just woke up.” Pulling a hand out from his grip, you reach up to cradle his jaw with a grin, running your thumb across his lips. “It’s a good look. Refreshing.”

“Do you see now?” He smiles down at you, turning his head to press a kiss to your palm. “Don’t you dare hate yourself for being human. Every little thing that you hate about yourself, I get to love for the both of us.”

“You’re such a sap.” You pat his cheek with a grateful smile, laughing a little at his disheveled state. “Thanks for pretending to have bed head to make me feel better.”

His smile turns sheepish, embarrassed. “No, no, I’ve lied to you, my love.” He hangs his head in shame. “I’ve never wanted you to think of me as anything less than the best I could be, so…I lied to you.”

“Wait, wait, wait. You’ve been using an illusion every single morning??”

“…yes.”

“And here I am, getting all self-conscious about what I look like in the morning?”

The look in Loki’s eye is simply broken. “I am so, so sorry, I never should’ve—”

His voice dies out when you pull him down and firmly press your lips to his, knotting your fingers in his tangled, messy hair. “You’re so stupid,” you giggle, stealing another kiss. “We’re both so stupid.”

A cracked smile breaks out over his face and he rests his forehead on yours—he can’t help but agree with you.

“Let’s be ugly every morning together, okay?” You hug him close, burying your face in his wild hair.

“How about we be beautiful every morning together, instead?”

You laugh and kiss him again, and Loki sinks down to rest lightly on top of you, this time burying his face in the crook of your neck, not hesitating to plant a breathy kiss there, too.

“I’m still pissed off, though,” you murmur, gently stroking a hand through his hair.

“Why, my love?”

“You still taste like peppermint.”

* * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * *

hope you enjoyed, feel free to send me ideas!

loki tags: @bluediamond007 @himitoshi @drakesfiance @destiel1597 @dangertoozmanykids101 @archy3001 @jcalpha1 @yzssie @skullvieplu @forthesnakeofdragons @skulliebythesea @wegingerangelica @storiesfrommirkwood @agarwaeneth @adaliamalfoy @laurfangirl424@paradisaicsam @fitzsimmons-is-forever @ladylokimischief @katelinwrites @tarynkauai @polaristrange @loavesofmeat @canadian-ravenpuff-multishipper @lou-makes-me-strong @holyn0vak @chocolatealmondmillk @swtnrholland @kenzieam @jessiejunebug @catticas @the-republic-and-face-of-texas @doralupin01 @whitewitchdown @atomiccharmer @falconfeather23435 @babygirlicecream @avengrcs @vethrvolnir2 @bookgirlunicorn @wabisabigrl @myhealingstar @khaleesi-marvel @ei77777 @spacecrumbs @scarlettrosella@rocks-are-pretty-odd @confessionsofastrugglingteen @easilydistractedwriter @arttasticgreatnessoftheawesome77 @fluffyllamaswearinghats @milktearose@lcyouinhell @h0tshotholland @dontmesswithmemundane @southsidesarcasticwriter @helnik-s @lilith-akemi @fire-in-her-veinz @unlikelysamwinchesteronahunt @mischievousbellerina @kcd15@mellowgirl01 @lokislilcaribbeanprincess @allthingzhiddleston @scorpionchild81 @lokixme @vast-ish @blue-automne @galaxycharmed @devilbat @kangaroobunny @end-up-well

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themadvigilantist · 4 years

Text

new things about dantalion that he still won’t talk about or do or bring up unless forced:

his voice is most often dark and deep. Can also be as whispers or male and female alternating voices.

note that this can change over many faces and used to be poetic but now just doesn’t do that. what was the point?

dantalion doesn’t have a gender or pronouns to call them but, a millenia of people labeling danta as ‘he’ and ‘she’ and ‘they and them, their, theirs, themself, sie, hir, hir, hirs, hirself, zie, zir, zir, zirs, zirself, mx (etc.) or whatever you want to address them as, this is fine and they will respond to any of them

note that he just hates being called an angel and if asked ‘what’s in your pants?’ he will say, ‘your death date, wanna peek?’. after all he can appear as anyone but, he picks specific faces to stay in because he likes different attributes that they have. like one’s voice versus one’s eyes versus how they look in clothing or a wig or makeup.

note that he tends to just use he pronouns but, this was out of pure will to not just put down ‘demon. dantalion’ not mister or miss no, just ‘ah right this way, demon. dantalion’ but he has used dn as an abbreviation of demon in the place of said pronouns from time to time. if he remembers it.

he always knows how you think - consciously and subconsciously - and he can control these thoughts however he pleases. he can also teach people how to be telepathic.

note that he will never do this for any reason or for anyone. there is no exceptions. if vin or v cut you out through a bond, he won’t help you adapt to that by being telepathic. he’ll ease your mind, calm it down but, he will never offer a choice of telepathy. this is only because one: the drawback is that you still can’t read the mind of that ‘special someone’ you love and two: you still won’t be able to read his mind. there is no so-called ‘door’ where one opens and either one can read the other’s mind when it comes to him. that angel bit of him kicks in and kills the ‘invader’ by burning their mind completely until their eyes are just sockets. do not attempt to be the first to enter his mind if you are telepathic human/other species. you will die as a result.

note that the only reason vin can specifically do so and not [insert telepathic species here]/evangeline/v/allura/vigil is because vin had him in his head for what is marked down as years were actually many millennia (regenerations included). his species were trained to ‘expand their mind’ on a internalized literal level, vin expands his mind just as quickly as dantalion could burn someone out.

note that the only reason vin’s tardis (and at one point, vigil’s) is psychically able to talk to him - even outside vin’s body - is that the sentient technology is just that: technology. both dantalion and a tt capsule cannot possess each other because both minds are constantly at a standstill. he can understand what they are saying because the tt capsules are a flesh body away from becoming angels/demons themselves.

He change said thoughts of all people at his will.

note that this also means that whatever kilgrave (because i rp a kilgrave @drbabygirl) does, that’s just basic extreme easy level okay. this is worse. don’t tempt him to do this, he’ll do it like he’s oprah and the world is his audience about to get a special surprise but hopped up on mentos, soda, caffeine and red bull all in one.

He teaches all art & sciences. You need a sculptor for tomorrow, he can fix that. you need a physics and biology teacher? he got you.

He can teach on how to achieve alternative states of consciousness (OOBE, Lucid dream, higher states, past life reading, hypnosis etc.) and he can accompany you during them

note that he won’t. he just won’t. humans need sleep. don’t break your brain.

He can help you open astral senses or knowledge of something that you want to know (you might die or you might go into a coma. or a deep sleep. it depends on what you want to know) but, he won’t do it.

Teaches persuasion, manipulation, lies, flirt, good speeches, relations, mind control, generally all social skills. he does all of this too, this is why he has friends and lovers and why he has an abandoned apartment building as his earth home, resident of one: himself.

He can heal or help you with low self-esteem, negative thoughts, neuroses, depression, other coded wounds in one’s subconscious.

he doesn’t talk about doing this but, if your muse is just chill with a demon who has a taste for killing and taking his advice on anything when it comes to those issues, this is the reason why.

he will never say it like that. and he will do it while the other is conscious just like a tardis will just automatically translate without the human/species consent. it’s just there.

He can suddenly put in a state of deep peace and relaxation, and show you how to do this with your mind and has the ability of knowing the exact word to calm said mind.

note he will not teach you how to do this. he’ll just calm your mind. the last human he taught this died gruesomely despite trying to making it seem like a good thing but, only realized the second dantalion just watched with a confused grin that dantalion wasn’t going to help stop what was happening to them.

He can cause love or other emotions

note that it used to be that if the person didn’t know you at all (i.e. a complete stranger) they couldn’t instantly fall in love with you but, now at this point, he can actually do this. though this will intentionally backfire for those that ask this of him. it will get the desired effect for a day but, then it becomes a ‘if i can’t have you no one will again’ situation.

why is your muse extremely annoyed/angry by his presence? that’s him. the little shit.

Has the ability to cause obsession (any kind of obsession), illusions , fear or hallucinations. This is why ‘scaring’ him doesn’t work. He’s not easily phased by what a canonical/original villain can do, let alone a beginner of a ‘good guy’. If he can cause fear then he will have no fear and remember, he enjoys manipulating the mind so, if you want to scare him, you might need try a little harder than ‘angel-based’ weapons and ‘demon blood’. Maybe showing (accurately) on how to turn him back into an angel will work (and with positive results. He’s knowledgable so, he’ll know if its’ incorrect or correct without giving it away and i won’t give it away because ahaaaaaaaaaah i haven’t written it and i’ll forget it so, no. good luck.)

Cause lust (and he’s extremely very good at it. scarily good at it. i wish i was exaggerating but, it’s also canon-based on the actual demon so, i’m not exaggerating. i’m just relaying it. could i write it? no but, i can list it.)

that kink, that one kink you think no one knows that you/the muse have - that happen to be an actual thing - he knows it and will not tell you how or why he knows it and knows well enough to make a profession of it. he’ll act on it. (me, i gotta research it but, HEALREADYKNEWITIMUGH)

Finds a person similar to others and causes them to unite (even if your other half is technically dead) either romantically or platonically.

Knows secrets (knowledge, but not only) and reveals secret councils, which means that if there is a secret society, he will know about it. unfortunately, no exceptions.

Can show a person other aspects of their own personality and makes that person more charismatic or who they want to become. yet again, depending on the person as of late, he bounces off what their partner wants and eggs people on.

hence why for most of vin’s spouses, he tends to wind people up when it comes to hurting him/desiring him because its what they mentally want to do and he always want someone to act on what they actually want. it’s the truth.

Can cause people not paying attention to you. This is a benefit for espionage but, can also be horrible for others who want to be noticed but, he just goes ‘nah, suffer’ .

He’ll text symbols like -

eyes/eye | 👀/👁👁

faces | see any emoji

crown | 👑

books | 📚

the speaker | 🔊

the judge | 𐑡 or 👩‍⚖️

Judge’s stuff of high social rank | 🔨

scepter | not invented yet

psychedelic waves/smoke | ♨️💨♨︎

dandelions | ⚘

brain | 🧠

mask | 🎭

mirror | not invented yet

water | 💦💧🌊

clouds | ☁️☁︎

the priest [note that now he uses a different emoji for this] | 🗣

#c: dantalion #mv: decretum #mv: prowess #mv: canonie

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glitterandmoondustofficial · 6 years

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Side To Side: Extra Chapter

Characters: Ruby, Law

Rating: Teen

Warnings: Nakedness

Notes: This is something that happens but never really fit in the actual fic ¯\_(ツ)_/¯

Extra Chapter: A Date

Ruby brushed her hair in Law’s bathroom, smoothing out the waves and making the usual mess more tameable. She hummed softly as she looked at herself in the mirror. Her body was marred with bruises and hickeys and bite marks from the previous night(s). Things were going well between her and Law. Like, scarily well. She almost believed she was in a coma dreaming all of this because things never went this well for her.

The sound of footsteps filled her ears as Law dragged himself into the bathroom. He looked sleepy and offended to be conscious. His hair was messier than usual and he had sleepy bags under his eyes (added onto the emotional baggage bags). Best part was that he was naked; they had both recently decided to just not wear clothes to bed, unless they were cold. That meant Law was almost always naked. Ruby greedily watched him as he walked into the room and to the sink, appreciating his hips and stomach and the scratch marks on his back that may or may not have been from her.

“Morning, sleepy head,” she said and he grunted, squirting toothpaste on his toothbrush before putting it in his mouth. Ruby grinned and leaned up on her toes to kiss his cheek. He blinked and stared at her like he just realized she was in the room with him; which was cute. Perplexed and wide eyed with a toothbrush in his mouth.

“Morning,” He said dropping the toothbrush from his mouth. He quickly but clumsily caught it, causing Ruby to giggle at him. He had a small blush on his cheeks as he reached for a hand towel to wipe his mouth, embarrassed frown on his face. He was so cute when he was flustered. It was certainly great how Ruby was able to see this side of him despite him being a dangerous pirate who looked like that. Muscles and tattoos and scars and wonderfully firm and rough skin. Ruby was pretty sure she had dreamt him up. Ruby leaned up and kissed his cheek again, nuzzling his cheekbone softly. She felt him relax and enjoy the early morning affection. “Have you showered?”

“Yeah,” he pouted a bit in response, but quickly hid it. Ruby smiled and started to kiss his face over and over, causing him to laugh. “You’re adorable, Law.”

“You’re the only one that thinks so.”

“Oh, I don’t know, I wouldn’t be surprised if the crew thinks so, too.” She grinned and kissed him one last time. Law snorted and made his way to the shower; turning it on while Ruby reached for her panties on the counter to put on. She stopped short when she got a brilliant idea. “What if I joined you?”

“Didn't you already…” he trailed off, realizing what she meant. “Well,” he smirked. “If you really feel you need one.” Ruby grinned at him and followed him into the hot water.

~~~~~

“I actually have to shower, you know,” Law murmured to her as Ruby nuzzled his neck and ran her fingernails across his back and butt. She whined a bit into his neck.

“But I wanna relax with you in here,” she said not making any move to get out of the shower and get ready for the day. He reached for her face, tilting it up and kissing her fully. Ruby lost all of her composure, instantly losing track of any and everything. Law pulled away from her and her lips subconsciously followed his. “How was that supposed to convince me to leave?” He chuckled at her before giving her a quick peck on the forehead.

“It wasn’t supposed to. I just wanted to kiss you, I do get that privilege these days.”

“True,” she wrapped her arms around him snugly. She closed her eyes contently “Law, let me take you on a date.”

“A date?”

“Yeah,” she opened her eyes. “I wanna pretend we’re normal for a night.” She looked up at Law and smiled at his “trying not to smile happily” smile.

“If that’s what you want.” Oh, she had become so good at knowing when he was excited and happy.

“It is,” she kissed his chin. “I’ll go ahead and let you take an actual shower. I’ll see you on deck, alright?” He hummed and kissed her forehead. Ruby got out of the shower and dried off, already starting to plan her date with her boyfriend on their next island trip.

#side to side #ruby #one piece fanfiction #lawxoc

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reyloisblessed · 7 years

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This has probably already been discussed somewhere, but I just read your post about Kylo's hands/fists and body language and it made me think. I've seen posts by ants criticizing his body language at the start of the interrogation scene that his crouching below Rey was predatory. I don't read it that way BUT do you think there's a chance he was actually on one knee?? Either way I think it was sweet that he's looking up at her but that would be adorable!

Hi hi! o/ Thanks for the ask.

The unfortunate truth about body language: it’s scarilynuanced. A person looking through a narrow lens can easily misjudge thesituation. You can’t read body language as small snippets or five second cuts.You have to look at the overall arc to understand the shift in character growthand dynamic. Not to mention this is a story, and stories are tied to symbolismwhich is equally as nuanced. This is where people who make these types ofarguments misunderstand, I’m afraid.

TFA was not solely the interrogation scene. It was afast paced story that covered many characters, many places and many dynamics,so their argument that Ben was predatory in his actions when looking up at Reyis deliberate ignorance on their part. They are purposely cherry picking andignoring the other aspects of not only Ben Solo, but the story as a whole.

Ben Solo is damaged and volatile in this film. He’sscarcely holding onto his sanity and it shows. He’s been manipulated andabused, but that doesn’t make him any less dangerous. He is very dangerous.It’s this fact that completely debunks their argument of him being predatorytowards the protagonist in the interrogation scene, because it’s their relationship in particular that Ben’sentire story arc hinges upon.

Throughout the film we see Benportrayed as a masked monster, filled with rage, and yet when he pursues andcaptures Rey, his body language completely shifts. His voice even changes. Adamdoes a splendid job on nuance and most can miss it. This isn’t entirely an anti’sfault, either. The film was purposelywritten to mislead viewers. That’s why Reylos have had to fight so hard ontheir side of the argument, because the Reylo community has done the research.You’ve many talented people who have studied film, folklore, mythology andvarious other crafts to know what’s actually being communicated in the story.That and all the canon evidence staring us in the face.

I’ll be frank. When I first saw TFA I was not a fan ofthe movie nor any of the characters, least of all Kylo Ren. However, I neverdoubted that it was compassion I perceived from him in the interrogation scene,because the film already showed me his chaotic, villainous side. That and youhave the mirrored Poe interrogation which was starkly contrasted to Rey’s. You don’twaste screen time on another interrogation scene, now with theprotagonist, if it’s only going to rehash elements that have already beencovered. You would have had a very different scene between Ben and Rey if thiswas the route they’d chosen to go.

Yet theydidn’t.

The scenewas paramount is showing a NEW side to Ben Solo, one the audience was notexpecting, and this particular side is revealed in the presence of ourprotagonist. Ben’s body language speaks volumes on a subconscious level. He notonly was below Rey looking up, a sign of submission and reverence, but he alsoapproached her with this oddly stiff walk that stuck out like a sore thumb. Igot the impression that he wasn’t completely comfortable exposed before her,arrogant peacock or not. His feeble attempts to control his facial expressionswere a glaring indicator, too.

On a sidenote, but I consider it a major factor for this argument, Ben allows Rey tospeak first. This is what sold itfor me that she was actually the one in charge of the entire scene. Whetherconscious or subconscious, Ben allowed Rey the power to dictate his first wordsto her in the situation. It’s funny. She’sthe one asking him questions and he’s answering. Now watch Poe’s interrogationagain. Who’s interrogating who here?*wink wink*

Moving on, Benwas exposed and this interrogation scene was meant to illustrate something veryimportant. Not everything is as it seems with Ben and/or Rey. Keep in mind thatthis was the scene where Rey’s Force abilities truly awakened. You could haveeasily had an antagonistic fight between Ben and Rey that rouses her abilities,but this wasn’t only about Rey’s Force powers. Yet again, more nuance. Thisscene was about both of them and their interesting relationship moving forward.

Lastly, I think Ben was squatting before Rey. Not kneeling orcrouching. Crouching is a totally different posture. Both his hands appear tobe resting on his knees and the way he rose up as he took off his mask gives methe impression. He also is slightly teetering from front to back, keepingbalance. Adam does a decent job at hiding it, but it’s hard to hold a positionlike that and be stone still. I’m not saying he isn’t kneeling. He definitely could be, but it doesn’t appear thatway to me.

#reylo #asks #anon asks #interrogation scene #anti fuckery #body language #nuance #this turned into an essay #i'm so sorry #lol

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ladyfogg · 7 years

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Worshipped

Fic Summary: After Constantine restores Sarah’s soul, Felicity comes home to find the magic man locking lips with Oliver.

Fic Pairing: Felicity/Oliver/Constantine

Warnings: Smut

A/N: This was a wonderful commission I didn’t know I needed in my life. It was pretty fun to write. Enjoy!

Felicity was exhausted. As used to the vigilante lifestyle as she was, the day had proved to be particularly taxing. Nothing could prepare someone for watching their friend's soul being returned to their body. Oliver had left some time before she had, equally tired, if not moreso. Eyes drooping, Felicity stifled a yawn as she let herself into the loft. It was quiet, with most of the lights off, bathing the loft in shadows.

“Oliver?” she called.

There was no answer, and Felicity frowned as she locked the door behind her. Taking a few steps further into their home, she noticed a tan trench coat slung over the back of the couch. Felicity turned her attention to the open balcony doors and froze. Oliver and Constantine had not noticed she was home, since they were too wrapped up in an intense, and slightly painful looking, liplock. Felicity’s mind went fuzzy and then blank as she watched, mouth agape. She stared for a good thirty seconds before she came back to herself and realized she should speak up. Though, she had nothing prepared for walking in on her boyfriend kissing another man.

“Woohoo, hello,” she said loudly, scaring them apart.

“Felicity!” Oliver exclaimed, breathlessly. “It's not...this isn't…” John smirked and Felicity found she was also amused at the normally composed Oliver Queen stuttering and stumbling over his words.

“So, I didn't just walk in on you and John Constantine making out?” she asked.

“It was...a goodbye,” Oliver said.

“Looked like one hell of a goodbye,” Felicity said.

“That it was,” John spoke up. He reached into his pocket and withdrew a cigarette, slipping it between his lips. “Pretty sure there was tongue.”

“You tongued him?” Felicity asked, raising her eyebrows.

Oliver snatched the cigarette out of John's mouth, tossing it over the balcony. Amidst John's protests, Oliver entered the room, making for Felicity. “I'm sorry,” he apologized. “It didn't mean anything.”

“Thanks, mate,” John said, sarcastically.

Felicity found she wasn't angry, or jealous. She was more surprised than anything else. “Oliver, I'm not mad,” she told him. “Confused? Yes. Exhausted? Yes. Curious? Very much so. Aroused? Slightly, but that's something else entirely…” She forced herself to stop babbling.

John caught her slip up and he grinned. “Aroused you say?” he teased.

Felicity shook her head as Oliver’s eyes widened. “No! Nope, forget I said that,” she urged. “I’m sorry. It’s late and my brain pretty much stopped functioning when I found you two going at it.” She regarded Oliver curiously. “There aren’t many people from your past you haven’t slept with, are there?”

Oliver cracked a small smile and gave a slight shrug, neither confirming nor denying her question verbally. She had her answer regardless.

Felicity nodded, “That's what I figured,” she said. “Not that I'm judging! I would never judge you for...whatever happened before me isn't...you’re very handsome, and women like...well, people like you…”

“You’re taking this scarily well,” Oliver commented, eyes narrowed suspiciously.

John chuckled, shoving his hands in his pockets as he watched with amusement. “This is well?” he asked.

“Well, she hasn't hit me yet,” Oliver told him.

Felicity sighed with a tired smile. “As I said, I'm exhausted right now, but I also trust you. If you say it didn't mean anything...I'll take your word for it.”

“It probably helps we’re two incredibly handsome men,” John said. He slung his arm around Oliver’s shoulders, who barely reacted, still focused on his girlfriend.

Despite herself, Felicity had to agree. “Yeah, well. That might be helping a little,” she said. “So, I’m assuming you’re just leaving, John? Hence the overly-friendly goodbye.”

“He was,” Oliver said, knocking John’s arm away as he turned to face the other man. “Again, thanks for your help with Sarah. If you need me, you know where to find me.”

“Now, hold on, mate,” John said, leaning in closer. “I’ve got no plans after this. Don’t see any reason to go rushing off just to find a hotel room somewhere. Tell you what, why don’t I stay a bit and we can catch up.”

John reached out and placed his hand on Oliver's lower back, leaving no room for misinterpretation on what he offered. Felicity grew warm at the sight of them, watching as Oliver subconsciously shifted into the touch. He closed his eyes briefly, and she could practically hear the string of obscenities he was mentally shouting. However, as arousing as she found the thought of the two of them together, Oliver was her boyfriend and felt she should have a say in the matter.

“I’m not leaving so you can have sex with my boyfriend,” Felicity told John. “I'm not that understanding.”

John’s heated gaze met hers, and she felt her cheek flush. “Who said anything about you leaving?” he asked, reaching out to tuck a strand of loose hair behind her ear. The tips of his fingers grazed the shell and even such a small touch was able to make her shudder. “I think we could stand to get better acquainted, don’t you agree?”

Felicity almost forgot to breathe. “I...you mean...the three of us…” she stuttered.

It was suddenly too hot in the loft and Felicity couldn't take her eyes off John or Oliver, looking between the two rapidly. They stared back, John waiting for an answer, Oliver gauging her reaction. She was surprised he didn’t outright refuse, which led her to believe he wasn't opposed to the idea.

After nearly a minute of stunned silence, Oliver spoke up. “John, I don’t think she’s interested,” he said, putting a hand on John’s chest and gently pushing him back so there was some space between them.

“I never said that,” Felicity blurted out.

Oliver’s head whipped around to look at her. “You’re actually considering this?” he asked.

“You are too!” Felicity accused. “And, why shouldn't I consider? It's not something that has ever been presented to me before.”

John looked way too pleased with himself and began to undo his tie. “Well, well,” he said. “Seems your bird has a bit of a naughty side to her, Oliver. You lucky sod.”

Oliver ignored him, stepping closer to Felicity. “Do you realize what you’re agreeing to?” he asked, taking her hands.

Through the lust and nervous excitement, Felicity felt a surge of annoyance. “I’m not a prude, Oliver,” she said. “I fantasize just like every other person out there. Granted, none of my fantasies involved you and me in bed with a British magician, but...since when have our lives ever worked out like we imagined?”

“Warlock is more accurate,” John corrected. “And if our Ollie here isn’t up to it, I will take my leave with no hard feelings.” He paused, tie undone and hanging around his neck as he leaned in to whisper in Oliver's ear. “Well, one hard feeling.”

Oliver sighed heavily, giving him an annoyed look before turning to Felicity once more. He looked as if he wanted to speak, but she didn't want him to try and talk her out of it. The last few days had been awful, and the prospect of sharing a pleasurable evening with two gorgeous men was thrilling. Terrifying and daunting, but still thrilling. Felicity leaned in and kissed Oliver, silencing whatever he was going to say. He immediately yielded to the kiss, hands leaving hers so he could cup her face. She tried not to be conscious of the fact that John was no doubt watching them, and instead focused on Oliver's wonderful lips moving along with hers.

The kiss didn't last as long as she would have liked. When they parted, Oliver smiled, eyes sparkling with mischief. Felicity smiled back, and Oliver lunged forward, pulling her into another kiss. This one was less chaste, more excited, and she completely lost herself, until she felt a hand on her lower back that was definitely not Oliver's. Drawing away slightly, she turned her head to look at John. He flashed her a smile, before slipping his hand onto the back of Oliver's neck and yanking him into a kiss. Up close it was even more stunning than the last. This time they both held her close, trying to include her even though they were the ones kissing. Felicity cocked her head and studied them, noting how both seemed to be trying to force the other to yield. And judging by the way Oliver grunted, she had a feeling John was winning. They gasped for breath when they broke apart, both turning their heads to give her smoldering looks.

“Shall we take this to the bedroom then?” John suggested, an arm around each of their waists.

“Uh, sure,” Felicity stuttered. “That’d probably be the most comfortable. Big bed and all.” God she felt out of her element. For once in her life she wanted to be chill, but that didn't seem like it would be possible.

“I'll lock up,” Oliver said, motioning to the front door. He gave her a quick kiss on the temple before stepping away to take care of the security system.

John offered his arm and Felicity shakily accepted, leading him up the stairs and to the bedroom. Once the bed came into view, the reality of the situation overwhelmed her and she had to take a moment to collect herself. Felicity stood stock still as John's arm slipped from hers and he wandered over to the bed, sitting on the edge with such ease, it was as if he owned the place. Arms wrapped around herself, Felicity wandered over to stand in front of him.

“If you couldn't tell, this is a first for me,” she admitted.

John smirked, leaning back on his hands. “I gathered as much,” he said.

“You've done this before I take it?” Felicity asked.

John nodded, getting to his feet. He reached out and gently placed his hands on her hips. “No need to be nervous, love,” he said. “I believe in boundaries and if you're not comfortable--”

Felicity screwed up her courage and grabbed John by the front of his shirt, pulling him into a kiss. John's noise of surprise was muffled, but she could feel him smile as he relaxed against her. Kissing John was different from kissing Oliver. John had some bite to him, nipping and rolling her bottom lip between his teeth. While Oliver was controlled even in the throes of passion, John was anything but, exploring and discovering her mouth hungrily. He tasted faintly of cigarettes, which Felicity could tolerate, especially when his tongue petted hers. The stairs creaked, and instinctively Felicity jerked away.

John's mouth was slightly parted, his cheeks tinged red, and his pupils blown wide from arousal. He looked past her, smirking as Oliver came to stand by them. “She seems a bit nervous, mate,” John said, hands squeezing her hips.

Oliver came up behind her, putting his hands on her shoulders. “You know I won't let anything bad happen to you,” he said.

“If I didn't want this then I wouldn't be here.” Felicity snapped, annoyed.

Oliver came around to stand next to John, and the next thing Felicity knew, she was pushed onto the bed, landing on her back. Both men shared a smirk before meeting her gaze again. Felicity’s stomach fluttered as they descended on her. It was hard to tell whose hands were whose, as they tugged and pulled at her clothing, wrestling her from her pencil skirt and neatly pressed blouse. Clothes gone, she laid spread out before them, naked and flushed. John worked the buttons of his shirt, while Oliver yanked his own up and over his head.

“How do you want to do this, mate?” John asked. “I’m open to suggestions.”

Oliver studied Felicity, allowing himself a smirk as he undid his pants. “What do you want, Felicity?” he asked.

“I don't care as long as someone starts touching me,” Felicity responded, sitting up and yanking her hair free from its ponytail.

Oliver smiled lovingly, and reached over to gently remove her glasses. As he leaned over to place them on the nightstand, John took the opportunity to kiss Felicity, gently laying her down. His lips traveled across her cheek and down to her neck, drawing a small sigh out of her. When Felicity’s eyes fluttered open, Oliver leaned in, capturing her mouth this time. Hands began to roam her torso, long fingers and rough palms gently kneading her breasts.

She was overwhelmed by the sensations, not used to kissing someone while another's mouth feasted on her neck. Their differences were more noticeable this way, as each went at their own pace. Kissing Oliver wasn’t new to Felicity, yet this time it did feel strange. If she had to describe it, it was almost like he was trying to compete with John, to keep her focus on him even though another man was currently making his way down to her chest. One of them spread her legs, and she followed through, recognising Oliver's skilled fingers seconds later as he stroked her slit. His lips left hers and John came back up to take his place, his thumb circling her nipple, almost exactly the same way Oliver's circled her clit. Oliver moved further down the bed and John swung his leg over Felicity, straddling her body.

Her hands, which had been stationary, finally moved, sliding up John's back. Just then, Oliver's tongue swiped along her folds and she gasped, clinging to John. His mouth pulled hers into another breathtaking kiss, tongue continuing its brutal exploration. A hardness swelled against her stomach and Felicity wormed a hand between them, wrapping her fingers around John’s length. The weight against her palm had her flushing with excitement. He wasn’t as thick as Oliver, but he was longer and she found herself growing bolder with each stroke and squeeze.

John hummed with approval, bending his head to nuzzle her neck again. Another difference between the two: John made noise. Oliver did too occasionally, but not like John. Not loud gasps and moans, with whispered words of encouragement. Felicity had to rely on Oliver’s body language to tell her if what she was doing felt good. John made it abundantly clear that he liked what she was doing. Meanwhile, Oliver's mouth worked her slit expertly, tongue flicking and stroking just the way she liked. He wrapped his lips around her clit and sucked gently, making Felicity lose concentration on John's cock. She found it difficult to focus again, melting into the mattress as Oliver’s tongue delved inside of her.

John noticed, yet was not annoyed. “Don't worry about me, love,” he panted, grinding himself against her stomach. “Tonight it’s all about you.”

He cupped her chin and turned her head away, exposing her neck for him to nip and suck on. Oliver still tasted her, and between the both of them, her body was in a constant state of motion. She twitched and shuddered, moaning under their attention. The next thing she knew, Oliver's finger pushed into her, and she clung to John, arching her back with a loud moan. John smirked down at her, hand covering her breast to knead and squeeze the warm flesh.

“Bloody hell, he’s working you good, isn’t he?” he commented.

Oliver’s mouth left her folds as he peppered a few kisses along her hip. “Feeling a little left out, John?” he teased, breathlessly.

John chuckled, still nuzzling Felicity’s neck. “Maybe a bit,” he grinned. “You've already had the pleasure of dear Felicity. Maybe I could have a taste?”

“Be my guest,” Oliver said.

Felicity forced her eyes open, watching John kiss his way down her body as Oliver moved over. John settled between her legs, dipped his head low, and ran the pad of his tongue through her already slick folds. Felicity never felt so beautiful in her life. Being wanted always made her feel powerful, but being wanted by two men at the same time was something else entirely. She felt almost worshipped, with the way Oliver kissed her thighs, and John’s mouth worked her expertly. She could feel the beginnings of an orgasm building, and she fisted the sheets as her body jerked and twitched, hips gyrating along John’s mouth. Suddenly, two mouths were on her and she couldn’t handle it anymore.

The last of her nerves flew out the window, and she reached down to curl her fingers in their hair, tugging urgently so they knew what was on the way. Two fingers breached her, two tongues swirled her overworked clit, and that was the final straw. Felicity came hard, back arched and moan echoing through the loft as the waves of pleasure froze her in place. When she finally came down from her high, Oliver and John were kissing, sharing her taste between them.

“She’s quite fun, your Felicity,” John smirked between nips to Oliver’s lower lip.

Oliver smiled back, glancing at his girlfriend. “That she is.”

Felicity scoffed, gently kicking them. “I’m not a ride,” she said, her words slightly slurred. She was incredibly blissed out, body covered in a thin layer of sweat.

John broke the kiss with Oliver, pushing himself up onto his hands and knees to tower over her. “Would you like a ride?” he asked.

Felicity’s eyes widened at the prospect, suddenly realizing this night was far from over. Just like that, her body bounced back, desire burning hotter than before. Once she had the visual of herself writhing on John’s lap, she nodded enthusiastically. Two pairs of hands gripped Felicity’s body and she found herself rolling with John until he was laying on his back, while she sprawled across his chest. Between her legs, his cock nudged her excitedly, and somewhere in the back of her brain alarm bells sounded.

“Oliver…?” Felicity called.

“I’m on it,” Oliver immediately responded. He climbed off the bed and made for the nightstand, opening the small drawer. He pulled out a box of condoms and John squeezed Felicity’s hips excitedly once he noticed.

The taken care of, Felicity relaxed and John tugged her down into a kiss. He moaned into her mouth as Oliver joined them on the bed, straddling John's legs behind her. Her boyfriend yanked her back up, pressing her back to his chest as John smiled up at her. Oliver dropped his mouth to her neck, hands reaching up to cup her breasts. Being surrounded by so much hot, masculine flesh was intoxicating and Felicity found herself wanting more. Of everything. More kisses. More touches. More excited nips and bites. Just more pleasure, so that when the night came to its inevitable end, she would be thoroughly spent and satisfied.

John felt around for one of the condoms, and she watched as he carefully tore open the package. One of Oliver's hands slid down her stomach, but instead of touching her, like she expected, he reached out to grip John’s cock. Felicity watched, fascinated, as Oliver pumped the other man with practiced ease. Whether that ease came from having a cock himself, or experience with another man, she wasn’t sure. And given the circumstances, she figured asking him could wait. She added it to the never ending list of questions she had about Oliver Queen.

John groaned and instinctively thrust up into Oliver’s hand, jostling Felicity in the process. Understanding how John felt left out, she found herself wanting to participate as well, and reached out to help. Oliver stopped stroking John long enough for her to wrap her hand around John’s length. Then he covered her hand with his own, and together they stroked John, earning a string of swears for their efforts.

“Keep that up and this is going to be over far quicker than I would like,” John gasped, condom still in hand.

Oliver and Felicity chuckled in unison, letting John go. She had been so nervous before, but now in the thick of their passion, she was eager and aching. Oliver touched her unexpectedly, urging her up onto her knees with a hushed whisper. Felicity lifted herself so he could swipe two fingers through her wetness. John watched, eyes glued to Oliver’s ministrations between her legs as he hurriedly rolled the condom onto his swollen prick. Oliver spread her folds with his deft fingers, which allowed John to push into her with one hard thrust.

Felicity gasped, thighs already quivering from adrenaline and anticipation. Her body accepted John without a shred of resistance, swallowing him greedily. Oliver continued to rain kisses along her neck and shoulders, fingers pressing slow circles around her clit as John slowly slid into her, until she was firmly seated on his lap. It was an incredible experience, to be completely full of John, his hands gripping her hips, while Oliver's chest lined up her back. His stubble scraped her neck as he nipped and sucked, and she knew it would be red in the morning.

John groaned, eyes watching her and Oliver. “She's beautiful, mate,” he gasped.

Felicity could feel her boyfriend’s smile and hear it in his voice. “She's amazing,” he agreed.

She wanted to respond. But speaking seemed to not be an option, so she settled for letting her hands fall to John's chest. She took over, unexpectedly grinding hard on his lap. John nearly doubled forward, before he threw his head back with a guttural moan. Oliver pressed in closer, his cock tapping her backside persistently. She tried to reach behind herself for him, but he placed a hand on her shoulder and forcing her to lay on top of John. John wrapped his arms around her and picked up the pace, taking her hard and fast. The slapping of flesh could be heard over their moans, and Felicity could only lay with John and take it. Through her lusty haze, she craned her neck over her shoulder to glance at Oliver, only to find him watching them with a hungry stare, jerking himself off to the image of her being taken by another man. His gaze lacked jealousy or possessiveness. It only held adoration and fervor, and then slight amusement when he found her watching him.

Felicity gasped as John's cock brushed her sweet spot. Overcome with pleasure, she faced John again and her mouth was immediately accosted. He kissed her deeply, hand burying into her hair. This time she delved her tongue into his mouth, drowning in the feel and taste of him. She could feel a second orgasm coming fast, and she squirmed on top of John, whimpering. Disappointment in herself reared its ugly head. She didn’t want it to end just yet, they had just gotten started, and based on the way her body was convulsing, she knew this next one would probably be her last for the evening. Already she was getting sore, and her body was weary.

John's thrusts became erratic. He pounded up into her with a ferocity she had never experienced, and seemed neither troubled nor bothered by the fact their coupling wouldn’t be lasting very long. He chased it with determination, body slipping against hers as they became drenched in sweat. Felicity tensed, and the last of her control slipped away as the pleasure passed over her in waves. She broke John’s kiss to cry out, walls clenching around his shaft as she froze in place. John grunted in triumph, and pumped his hips several more times before he too came, moaning beautifully.

Boneless, Felicity barely reacted when Oliver lifted his hand from her shoulder, only to grab her by the waist. John's softening cock slipped out and then Oliver pushed in instead, draping himself along her back. It was nearly too much. Overstimulated was an understatement. Every thrust shook her to her very core and she lay trapped between the two men, too tired to do much more than moan.

Oliver didn't seem to care, taking his pleasure from her while John held her close, peppering her lips with kisses. Oliver reached around her to grab for John, kissing him just as harshly as when she found them on the balcony. Yanking back with a moan, Oliver called her name, a desperate chant that she would never grow tired off. When he finally came, it wracked his whole body and he rode the orgasm with several weak pumps of his hips, before he collapsed.

The silence was broken only by heavy breathing. Oliver eventually rolled off of Felicity, dragging her with him so they weren’t crushing John anymore. She lay motionless between them, willing her heart rate to slow down.

“Sure know how to show a bloke a good time,” John panted.

Felicity laughed softly and Oliver's body behind her shook with his chuckles. “I could sleep like this,” she confessed, nuzzling John's neck. Oliver was molded along her back and she tucked her head under John’s chin.

“Mmm, me too,” Oliver said, pressing a kiss to her shoulder.

“I'm game,” John said lazily, removing his condom. He tied it closed and dropped it on the nightstand, before turning to face Felicity completely, burying his face in her hair.

The events of the day had taken it's toll and the lovers were too tired to do anything other than get comfortable. Oliver carefully removed his condom, before pulling the comforter over the three of them. Felicity had already dozed off and John was nearly there himself. Oliver watched them for a moment, until sleep claimed him as well, a sated smile on his face.

#ladyfoggdrabbles #constantine fic #arrow fic #commission #john constantine fic

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