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havethetimeofyourstyles · 3 years

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Chapter One.

a/n: welcome to the first chapter of wtsgd! i’m so excited for you all to read this story and for what’s to come. please please please support content creators bc we’re doing this for free and it takes up a lot of energy to put out stories. so reblog, leave feedback, and send a message to motivate and support them. happy reading everyone <3

SERIES MASTERLIST | word count: 6.4k

come talk to me about wtsgd! i’d love to know your thoughts!

March 4, 2017

The trunk was filled with heavy boxes that were labeled with thick black sharpie, which didn’t seem to leave Luciana’s senses; and one too many suitcases filled with her many articles of clothing that she couldn’t get rid of—no matter how hard she tried—since she was too much of a hoarder and every piece of clothing seemed to have a lost memory in them that she tried very hard to think of, which only meant that it was worth keeping.

A droplet of sweat leaked down the side of her face due to her nonstop packing and heavy-lifting from her childhood room upstairs to her dad’s car in the driveway. It didn’t help that the sun was beaming down at her with every move like she was on center stage, in front of the spotlight, but it made much more sense for the sun to do that because that’s where she belonged: on stage.

Moving to Brooklyn, New York from Cambridge, Massachusetts during, what felt like, the coldest but the sunniest day of March wasn’t the smartest move—to be fair, Luciana was never one to make a smart move, anyways—but it was one that needed to be done. Plus, all the lifting seemed to have warmed her up.

Her destination, or now, home, in New York was one that she’d been anticipating for a while now. She had auditioned for the role as Kim in Miss Saigon on Broadway in November, and she’d gotten a callback in January for the role as the second Kim, meaning she would be on rotation to perform every week or two weeks, so the main Kim could rest. But she would still have to go to rehearsals and be on the side of the stage watching the show just in case she needed to jump in at the last minute.

It wasn’t her ideal way of playing the main lead, but nonetheless, she was grateful for the opportunity, and she would take any chance that was thrown at her to not only take another step towards her dream, but also another learning opportunity to make her a better actress.

Little Luci would’ve been so proud of the present Luci because it’d been her dream ever since she was younger, to be on stage and eventually, be on the big screen. Although she was far from completing her dream of being a face in Hollywood, this was a step that would take her to where she wanted to be in the future, and for that, she was proud of herself.

As a child, Luci had been in various commercials; from being the kid that played with slime and had no lines but to just put on a big smile while the sticky substance ran through her small hands, to being the daughter in a car commercial with one line that said “Are we there yet?” with a groan and a face of exhaustion as if she were the one driving the car. She hoped that these commercials would have someone recognize her talent, to cast her as a Disney star, but that would require moving to California, which her parents were wary of.

The commercials stopped when she reached middle school. Her early adolescent years consisted of an abundance of attitude and mood swings; Luci was a very tough and determined kid. Her love for acting had grown into a big balloon that was let go and on its way into the galaxy where no one could reach it—where no one could mess with her achieving her dream.

She would always stand in front of her white wooden framed mirror—with delicately painted colorful flowers around the border—reciting lines that she heard from a television series or the films that she watched, and she would write them down in her blue notebook. Sometimes, her parents would let her search the script up if it was available online. But oftentimes, she would test and challenge her memorization, and listen to it by ear; testing her mind, and eventually, her memorization skills were immaculate by the age of eleven.

It was perfect timing because by the time she was in middle school, she was able to snatch the roles she wanted when her school’s drama department held school plays. Her family thought that she would start to hate being on stage since school plays always ran until late evening, but being part of the productions had only enhanced her love for her talent, and it only prepared her for a quarter of what her future may look like.

All in all, from a very young age, she always knew that she wanted to become an actress. The spotlight or the center of the camera was where she always craved to be.

And she was finally making that dream come true.

A black Toyota Camry pulled into the space behind the car that was filled with her belongings. Ren and Beatrice, Luci’s lovely parents, both get out of the car with a pink box of donuts—a snack for the road and for when she gets to her new apartment.

“Ready, Lucky?” Beatrice asked, rubbing her daughter’s back. She was quite bummed to see Luci leave her childhood home, but she’s proud to see Lucky Luci chase her dreams. She was, after all, twenty-five and was bound to move out at some point, but to see it actually happen made Beatrice quite emotional.

“Ma, please, don’t cry…” Luci frowned as Beatrice pressed her fingertips to the corners of her eyes. She wrapped her arm around her mother’s shoulder, comforting her. “You’re all coming to New York in a month, right? To watch me on stage?” Luci asked, reassuring herself that she would see her family in a different state to rescue her from her loneliness.

Luci was an independent woman. She could do tasks by herself, go places alone, and she wouldn’t have a problem with it; she enjoyed the company of herself. But to know that at some point she might be alone—that everyone had left her behind or forgotten about her—was what scared her. She needed to know that the people who loved her unconditionally wouldn’t forget about her.

“Of course we’re going!” Ren exclaimed with a smile that Luci was going to miss seeing everyday. “We can’t miss our baby on the Broadway stage. If we could, we’d go to every damn show that you’re in, but that would be a lot of gas, no?”

She chuckled, nodding her head. She felt tears pricking her eyes at how supportive her parents were—they’ve always been. If she could, she would take them with her to New York, but her one bedroom apartment and their work said otherwise.

“Now, Lucky, don’t cry.” It was Beatrice’s turn to comfort her daughter. Like any parent, when they see their child cry, it breaks their heart and they cry too. “We’re gonna see you real soon. You can always come back anytime you want. We’re just a phone call away and we’ll pick you up,” Beatrice said between sniffles. The mother and daughter were embracing so tenderly and comfortingly—enjoying every last moment together until they got to see each other again.

“Jeez, you’re both the same—always crying!” Ren interrupted, making the two women laugh; and he was glad they found what he said amusing because he couldn’t handle the sad moment. “C’mon here, my Lulu.” Luci settled into her father’s arms, hugging him tightly. She’s always been her dad’s girl, despite having a close relationship with her mother, her relationship with her father was something that felt like home; he always knew what to say and when to say it. It helped that she was the female version of him. “You’re gonna be the best star out there, I’m sure of it. Now, I want you to have fun, alright? The fame, the fortune, the big city…it doesn’t amount to anything if you’re not having the time of your life” He comfortingly rubbed Luci’s back, holding her in a warm and tight squeeze.

Luci smiled at her father’s words. She was always a bit hard on herself when she would mess up or forget a line or a movement that correlates to a specific line in her script. When she was younger, she would beat herself up for a sliver of a moment; she would cry into her pillow—sobs loud enough that they were heard from downstairs. Luci would think that she wouldn’t become a well-known actress just because of the minor forgetfulness her mind had presented. But Ren would gently tap on her ocean blue door, letting himself in because he knew his daughter didn’t have the energy to get up and let him in, and he would sit beside her, gently urging her to sit up with him. Once she complied, after many groans of refusals, she would be glad she did because her father looked deeply into her eyes—and it was like looking into the reflection of clear and clean water—and told her she was a star. It was only three words, but those three words reminded her to never give up and get up when she would hit the pavement of what she felt like were her fallen hopes and dreams.

Ren would then end it with a statement of advice that had always lingered in her mind, resonating to the silent and harshful words that she tells herself. ‘Nothing will amount to anything if you’re not having the time of your life.’

A rush of gratitude settled upon her as her eyes became glossier by the seconds she was in Ren’s arms. Beatrice looked at her greatest treasures fondly, a smile appeared on her face only for it to be replaced by a look of confusion.

“Where is that damn brother of yours? He said he was going to be here at ten!” Beatrice interrupted the sweet moment she was having with her father, making them disconnect from the hug—just as Ren did with Luci and Beatrice.

Speaking of the devil, her dear brother was making his way towards home on the side of the street, wearing a grey sweatshirt that was stained with his sweat as his earphones were nestled in his ears, loudly playing music. He loudly sang along to some rap song, breath staggered as he rapped along with his hands.

Nathan smiled once he stepped foot onto the driveway as he took out his earphones, seeing his family look at him vigilantly. Luci laughed, shaking her head.

“Hey, there’s our superstar, little Ana!” Nathan opened his arms, ready to hug you but she quickly stopped him, curving her spine backwards to deny his hug. Ana had been one of the many nicknames her family had called her when she was growing up from the second half of her name, but Ana seemed to have stuck with Nathan as no one else really called her that, so it was his own personal nickname for her.

“Ew, please, do not hug me.” Her face wrinkled in disgust from the spell of her brother’s sweat from his run. Nathan chuckled, playfully rolling his eyes before turning towards his parents.

“Ooh, donuts-”

Beatrice slapped the back of his hand before he even got a chance to open the pink donut box. “Not until you shower and change. Lulu needs to be in Brooklyn by three!”

“Ow, mother!” Nathan whipped his hand away from Beatrice’s burning slap, although he was just playing around and being dramatic. “But fine, alright. The star always gets what she wants, am I right?” He dropped his head towards Luci, sighing before he hurried inside the house to take a quick shower and change.

Luci giggled, telling her parents that she would be right back to go up to her room to check if she’d gotten everything, even though she knew that she had everything, she just needed to reminisce alone for a moment.

Her feet took her up the wooden stairs, where she, for some unknown reason, always spent her time sitting on as she leaned her back against the wall and read or drew. Nathan always found it weird of her when they were doing homework when they were younger, but it was just one of the many fun anecdotes he could tell reporters if he’s asked about their childhood.

Pushing open her ocean blue door that she never changed because she loved the color, she was met with the emptiness of what was once her sanctuary. Despite the paint on the wall changing, the replacement of furniture, and rearrangement of her childhood room, Luci could still see the baby pink walls where she hung up various posters of her celebrity crushes when she was eight. She could still see herself walking over to her Cinderella white wooden dresser as she pulled out an inflatable microphone from her drawer before she walked over to her bed to sing her heart out with her cousin. In the corner of her room was her mirror that she painted colorful flowers along the border when she was younger, and she definitely did not want to change or get rid of it; it wasn’t difficult to stir up a memory when she was in front of that mirror because up until now, she was always reciting her lines to her own reflection until the late night.

All of these memories that Luci held within her heart would help her ground herself—remind her where she came from. No matter where her career took her, she would always be the girl that was firstly known in her room, crying, laughing, and acting within the four baby pink walls until she was sixteen, and then it changed to an ecru white. The feeling of nostalgia clutched her chest, and for the second time today—not even noon, yet—she found herself crying.

She silently sobbed in her sanctuary. Her chest felt tight, like her heart was grasping onto the memories, begging her to not leave, to not move on. But moving on would mean being stuck, and she didn’t want to feel stuck—she just never wanted to be in one place where the walls would slowly feel like they were closing in on her. She didn’t want to be in one place and eventually hated it, so for that, she had to move on.

A soft knock was heard from the outside of her bedroom, making Luci turn around hastily. She found Beatrice standing in the doorway, warmly smiling at her daughter, and keeping the tears at bay because she needed the comfort of her mother more than her mother’s tears.

“My Lucky Star…” Beatrice walked into the room, welcoming Luci into her arms. “You okay?”

Luci deeply inhaled and exhaled as she calmed herself down from her cries. “I’m alright. It’s just hard saying goodbye to this place—to my room.”’

“Oh, Lulu. You don’t need to say goodbye. I know you’ll be coming back here soon, anyways. I know you love home too much to completely stay away.” Beatrice was subtly trying to remind Luci about her love for her hometown, for her home, but her words also were trying to remind her about that certain love for her home and to never forget that love so she doesn’t stray away because Beatrice was simply afraid Luci would never want to come back once she discovered the luxury of her career. And even though she knew her Lulu wasn’t one to forget about her family, Beatrice would never admit her fear.

Luci sniffled, wiping her tears away as she pulled away from her mother’s embrace. “Yeah, I know. Just…doesn’t feel real that I’m leaving.”

“Sure, you’re leaving, but you’re going off to do bigger and better things. You were never one to stay in one place, physically and mentally—you were always moving, always loved learning more. And I’ve always been so intrigued and interested in how your mind works.”

“Ma…” The waterworks seemed to be the highlight of the move.

“I’m serious! I’m so genuinely proud of you. You’ve been keeping your talent—and I don’t mean ‘high school plays’ talent. I mean your Broadway, Hollywood, Academy winning talent. Now, you get to showcase your light in front of thousands of people.” Beatrice always had a way of boosting Luci’s self-esteem, making her ego a tad bit more bigger than it already was. She didn’t mind if her self-esteem had skyrocketed into the galaxy of her dreams, but she always reminded Luci that being humble and kind always outweighed being obnoxious and arrogant. “Now, enough with these tears. You’ve got a road trip to New York. C’mon, now.”

They made their way downstairs and out the door where Ren and Nathan were talking about the latest basketball game of the Celtics. The trunk was closed, and the only thing waiting was Luci herself.

“There she is! Ready?”

Luci took a deep breath, turning her head to look back at the pastel yellow house that had kept her safe for the past twenty-five years. From here, she knew everything was going to change. Whether it’d be for the good or if things would go downhill from here? She didn’t know; all she knew was that she was going to be doing what she loved and she was going to have the time of her life doing it.

“Yeah, I’m ready.”

The state of Connecticut seemed to pass by quickly from the car as Nathan drove at a decent seventy miles per hour; the state vanished just as quickly as when they entered.

Luci mindlessly looked out the window, thinking about everything and nothing at once as she drowned out the music playing through the speakers of the car and Nathan’s voice singing along.

The cars passing by, the bystanders, and the locals filled the streets and highways, making her wonder what all of these people’s stories were—wondering if they lived in this city or if they were just stopping by to visit, or if they’re just going through the state to get to the one next door just as she was. Maybe she’s had an encounter or simply passed by them on the street in a world that seemed too large but small at the same time. She always pondered on whether everyone else thought the way she thought—if they wondered what her story was or the people around them.

The world is an interesting place and there were so many intriguing people out there, making her more excited by the minute as she takes on this new adventure in her life that would be completely life changing. Luci’s going to be meeting so many new people that, she would hope, have an impact on her personal life or career.

“Nervous?” Nathan broke the comfortable silence between them.

Luci raised her brows and curled her lips into her mouth. “A bit.”

He nodded, thinking for a moment. Nathan was always one to think before he spoke, and it was a quality that some people needed to learn how to do. He quickly learned that lesson when he was in high school; one of his friends, Johnny, and him were going back and forth joking around with one another. And for some odd reason, teenage boys liked to joke around about fucking everything, so Nathan had said “Yeah, I fucked your mom, what about it?” without thinking. Johnny stayed silent, the rest of their friends were waiting for his comeback, but they only received tears that glossed over his eyes before he ran off to a different part of campus, away from the lunch tables. Nathan found him behind the orchestra building with his face pressed on his kneecaps, crying. Later, he found out that Johnny’s mother had passed away before their sophomore year started and he hadn’t told anyone, which left Nathan quite speechless, but it was a lesson that he learned: to think before anything comes out of his mouth.

“I know you’ll do great. You were born to do this, born to be on stage. Everything you do is to greater your experience and opportunities. All the mistakes you’re gonna make, which we both know you’re gonna make, they’re gonna be learning lessons for you to continue doing what you’re good at doing; the mistakes are there so you can better yourself,” he reassured, occasionally glancing at you briefly before averting his eyes back onto the highway.

Luci smiled, never taking her eyes off her older brother. She leaned closer to the middle console, where his right arm was resting on the padded console. Hugging his arm tightly and resting her cheek on his shoulder, she accepted and appreciated his advice, his words. They made her heart fill up with so much gratitude and love, insanely grateful and happy that she had such an amazing and supportive family who always knew the right things to say when they could sense her nerves and anxieties powering through the roof.

“You’re gonna kill it out there. This is just a step towards where you wanna go, where you actually wanna be.”

She nodded, looking to her right as they quickly passed the ‘Welcome to New York’ sign from the state line of Connecticut and New York, and it was the sign indicating her new home.

Nathan pulled into the apartment’s parking garage, entering in with the code that the complex gave Luci on the silver keypad as the two watched the automatic gate arm swing up to the side, and Nathan entered the parking structure, parking in one of the many spaces available.

Luci excitedly got out of the car, rushing to the trunk where Nathan had opened it from inside the car. Unfortunately, she had forgotten to bring the hand dolly to help carry the boxes, which meant that the siblings were going to have to carry the many boxes she packed by her own hand and strength. But luckily, some of them weren’t that heavy; most of the items in the brown boxes were kitchenware and she figured she could just drag those.

One by one, they took one box each and headed for the elevator, where it took them to her apartment floor—floor four. Luci grabbed the keys from her purse that contained two copper keys hanging on one single silver loop and a small keyless sensor, and she unlocked her navy blue door, revealing her new apartment.

When she entered, she was met with a door across the entrance that she would use for her coats and shoes, things that she would need when she’s rushing out the door. Going through the small hallway in from the entrance, it led her to another small hallway to her left where her bedroom and guest bathroom was; and to her right, it would take her to the kitchen and living space. With four big windows with black window frames, the natural light really came in, making her place brighter for saving electricity.

Walking in and putting the boxes against the black cabinets in the kitchen, she immediately fell in love with the space, her space. Despite already taking a tour of the apartment a few months prior to her official move in day, it felt different being there for the second time because she now knew that this place was hers. She saw it in a different light, and she was already anticipating the memories she was going to make in her new home. The place was empty; and with every step and every noise from her mouth, the room would echo, and she loved it. There was something satisfying about the echo in an empty space that was hers, like she wanted to furnish the hell out of it, but at the same time, she didn’t mind the echo.

“This is your new home.” Nathan put an arm around Luci’s shoulder. He got a bit emotional seeing his baby sister grow up and move away from home, but he was excited for all of the experiences and memories she was going to make. Luci looked up at him, not saying anything but smiling as she was speechless. Nathan could practically feel the excitement run through her and all he did was chuckle at her speechlessness. “C’mon, let’s go get the rest of the boxes.”

For the next fifteen minutes, Luci and Nathan hauled the boxes from the car, to the elevator, and down the hallway to her apartment. There were about four more boxes left in the trunk, and they would’ve been finished by now if they hadn’t been taking breaks.

Nathan’s phone rang as he was sitting on the floor, leaning against the cabinets of the kitchen across from Luci who was sitting in the corner where her dining table would be.

“Hello?” Answered Nathan. “What? Tonight? I’m in New York. I’m helping my little sister move here. Uh, okay. Sure. Bye.” He groaned, standing up.

“Who was that?” Luci asked, nosy as she was.

“That was one of the board members at Mass General Hospital.” Luci’s eyes widened. “They just asked me if I could come in tonight to teach and supervise the new residents.” Nathan was a general doctor working in the Emergency Room as Mass General back in Boston. He’s always wanted to teach with all the knowledge he’s stored in his brain—always wanting someone to learn a thing or two when they spoke to him, and this was his chance.

“Holy shit, that’s amazing, Nate!” Luci stood up, excited for him.

He started to breathe a bit heavily and Luci immediately took notice; she could practically feel the nerves coming out of him, the same nerves she felt while going in for an audition. “Yeah, I actually have to leave, like, right now.”

“Hey, hey.” She quickly stopped him from running out of the building and out of his mind. “Come here—breathe with me for a second.” She held onto his wrists gently.

“Luci, I have to-”

He pulled away, but she tugged him back. “You’re going to drive yourself through the highway, and who knows what will happen, you might get pulled over and you won’t make it to the hospital. So, just take sixty seconds to breathe with me.”

For the remainder of the time that they had together, they took some deep breaths. She spoke encouraging and uplifting words to him to calm down his nerves and anxieties that he seemed to drive himself over a cliff for, and it seemed to work as Nathan’s shoulder’s weren’t so tense and the grip on her hands had loosened.

The two of them walked down to the parking garage where Nathan took down the last four boxes and placed them by the entrance of the complex. He was adamant on helping her get the last few boxes up to her apartment, but she shrugged it off, telling him that she was able to carry them and that he needed to leave because he’s most likely going to hit traffic during rush hour.

“Call me if you need anything, okay? I mean it. I will drive here in a heartbeat.”

“I will, I will-”

“Just not tonight,” he joked. “This is the highlight of my career.” His smile was so bright that it was like he was a little kid on Christmas again who just received a Hot Speed set from Santa.

Luci laughed, hugging him goodbye. “And call me if you need anything too. I’ll miss seeing you everyday,” she admitted, a slight frown on her face. She thought she’d have the entire day with Nathan, but it was cut short due to his work but she wasn’t mad about that at all because she knew there'd be plenty of times when he would drive down to walk along the New York streets and see her perform.

“I’m gonna miss you too, Ana. But I love you and I’ll see you next month!” He hurried into his car, and Luci watched him as he pulled out of the driveway, waving at the rear view mirror to say one last ‘see you later’ to his little sister.

Walking back to the curb where all of the boxes were set, Luci picked one up to test how heavy it was and she barely made it upright without almost hurting her back, so she put the box down to take a proper breather. She decided to drag the box closer to the door of the complex—which saved her a few steps without completely dropping the box that was labeled ‘glass plates’—and pulled the handle of the door, only to find it completely locked. There was a slight panic that flew through her until she realized that she needed her keyless tag that she had to press against the pad on the wall to get inside the complex, so she blew out a sigh of relief before reaching down to her pocket for her key, and with just her luck, her keys weren’t in her pocket or with her at all. Then she started to panic again.

Luci quickly walked out of the parking garage and to the front of the building where the leasing office was to find them closed, which was odd because it was Saturday, but apparently their servers were down so they just decided to take the entire day off. She rolled her eyes annoyingly, walking back to the garage in a fast manner because she didn’t want anyone to take her boxes, and so she figured that she could just wait until someone left the complex or arrived. She even left her phone at her place, so it wasn’t like she could call anyone to help her, but some sort of entertainment would help the time go by quicker.

Sitting on the curb in the garage, pacing back and forth on the sidewalk, and humming the melody from the Miss Saigon soundtrack, an hour goes by until she sees someone walk past the automatic gate barrier, heading towards the entrance where he opened the door with his tag. Luci sprinted towards the door, calling out for help.

“Wait, wait!” The man turned around confusingly, taking his AirPod out of one ear. She caught up, taking deep breaths as she waved at the man. “Sorry, I’ve been out here for an hour and I completely forgot my key.” He didn’t say anything but stared at her, wondering why he’s never seen this woman before. The apartment complex really only had four floors, and he’s sure that he’s seen everyone who’s lived here. She noticed that he looked down at the boxes and back at her. “Oh, I just moved in.” He nodded more understandingly. “Do you mind holding the door for me?”

“Sure.” Was the first thing he told her before stepping aside to hold the door. She took another deep breath, getting into the correct form so she doesn’t throw her back out, and began to lift the heavy box. He noticed her struggling, and he felt foolish for not offering his help in the first place when he noticed the four boxes on the cement. “Here, sorry, let me help with that. Get the door, yeah?” Luci’s heart flipped once she heard his deep, accented voice before she gratefully thanked him and he grabbed the box from her, replacing her hands with his and the slightest brush of their fingers made her flustered; he held the box tightly to his chest without much struggle.

“Yeah, let me just get this one.” Luci grabbed a much lighter box that had all of her shoes, and held the door for him with her foot as he made his way inside of the building and to the elevator. He pressed the button with the arrow pointing up, and luckily, they didn’t have to wait for more than five seconds before the bell at the top chimed and the stainless steel doors opened.

With the heavy box in his hands, he still let Luci walk in first, which made her smile and he followed in as she pressed with the bold ‘4’ printed on it. He held the box in between his chest and the other end of the bar on the wall as they waited in silence as the elevator lifted them up to her apartment floor, and she brushed past him when he lifted his arm, gesturing her to go first.

Her front door was closed but it was unlocked, which only made sense, so she opened her door, putting the box next to the entrance and politely asking the man to put it next to the one you put down.

“Thank you so much, really. You have no idea how much I appreciate your help.”

“It’s no problem. I was the same when I moved here too—forgot my keys and was locked out.” He related to make her feel lighter about the situation since it was an honest mishap.

“Did you go to the leasing office?” She asked curiously.

“Yeah, but they were closed.”

“They’re closed today too! It’s like they do that on purpose whenever someone new moves in.” The man chuckled, scratching the back of his neck.

She hadn’t gotten a proper look at him since she was too distracted by trying to get into her building, but just by one real look at him, he was very attractive—probably too attractive to where she couldn’t think straight. He was wearing a pastel yellow and white striped button down that was a bit flowy and open, showing his white tank underneath that was tucked into his black skinny jeans. His tank top was low enough, exposing a patch of chest hair and his necklace that rested against his skin, in between his swallow tattoos just below his collarbones. Rings hugged his long fingers on both hands as he held two brown paper bags from Trader Joes. He was handsome, that’s for sure, and she felt like she was going to compare his beauty to all the other men that she was going to encounter in the future.

“They’re not very good at going into work, but if you give them a call then it’s like they’re a 24/7 help center.”

Luci nodded, chuckling. “Good to know. I’ll keep that in mind.”

“I’ll help you with the last boxes.” Before she was about to protest and tell him that he didn’t have to help her anymore because she was sure the last ones were light, he made his way towards the elevator and she quickly followed.

To her surprise, one of the boxes was heavier than the other and she was glad that the man was able to carry it for her. They took the boxes up to her apartment, stacking it on top of the ones that were set down before she thanked him gratefully again.

“I really appreciate all your help.” She smiled, leaning against the doorframe.

“Not that I’m doubting your strength or anything, but how were you supposed to get those boxes up to your apartment?” He asked softly, not wanting to offend her by his words.

“Oh, my brother was supposed to help me, but he had to go back home for an emergency at work.” The man nodded, seeming that was the most acceptable answer, not like he was searching if she was lying. “But thank you for your help. You’re a true lifesaver,” she said with a soft smile on her face. Her tone was a bit flirty than she wanted it to be, but it naturally came out.

“It’s not a problem. I’ll see you around.” Luci hadn’t closed her door yet, but she found out that he was literally her neighbor on the opposite side of the wall. He didn’t even have to take two steps to get to his place—all he had to do was turn around and he was home. She smiled at the thought of that, glad that her neighbor was already so kind to her.

As he was fumbling with his keys, he eventually got his door unlocked, and Luci was itching to ask what his name was—maybe make her first friend during her first day living in the big city. The man felt his neighbor's eyes on him, burning through the back of his head, so he turned around at the same time she spoke.

“Uh, hey,” Luci called out. He was looking over his shoulder, pursing his lips as he raised his brows. “I was wondering if…you’d like to have dinner with me tonight? Y’know, to thank you for all your help and practically saving me while I was stranded.” She chuckled, playing with the tips of her fingers as she looked at him with hope.

He thought the invitation was nice, but…“It’s okay, really. I, uh, have plans already tonight,” he admitted honestly because he doesn’t make a habit of being dishonest.

Luci had some thick skin—she grew it throughout the years, and she had always been pretty confident. So many people would think that she could handle rejection well because she’s auditioned for many roles in her lifetime, and had been rejected for most of those roles. But the rejection that her neighbor handed to her so respectfully and politely was one that hit her the most, and she didn't know why.

Curling her lips into her mouth as she felt the pang of her heart sinking into her chest, she nodded and placed a small smile onto her face.

“Have fun tonight, then. I’ll see you around.” She grinned, hiding the slight bit of pain that she felt. He nodded, walking inside his apartment as she was in her doorway as well. “Oh, I’m Luci, by the way.” She introduced herself, feeling like she should have done that ten minutes ago, but it had slipped her mind.

The corner of the man’s mouth turned up into a sly smirk, and she nearly felt herself fall as she gripped the door handle tightly. It was enough to make the pain in her chest disappear, and all thoughts of the rejection that she would think about for the rest of the night vanished.

“Nice to meet you, Luci. I’m Harry.”

With that, Harry closed his door, putting a barrier between him and Luci, who was still standing in her doorway. She let out the longest sigh of her life, feeling like she’d been constricting herself from breathing properly for the last ten minutes.

Luci closed her door and leaned against it, looking down at the boxes that were resting by her feet. She softly smiled, her cheeks were starting to get warm, and she was fully aware that Harry was the cause of it.

come talk to me about your thoughts and feelings! hope you all enjoyed the first chapter, thank you for reading <3

ty to @sunflowers-styles for beta reading!

#harry styles fanfiction #harry styles angst #harry styles series #harry styles x oc #harry styles fic #harry styles ff #harry styles smut #harry styles fluff #harry styles au #boyfriend!harry #harry styles writing #harry styles solo #actress!oc

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passable-talent · 4 years

Text

VADER X GN!READER

cryst am I writing a fic? what is that. who does that anymore akfkvjsb

dedicated to @sunsetkenobi bc she deserves it and I probably wouldn’t be writing this otherwise

okay so if you’ve seen how to train your dragon 2, this is that one scene. ya you know the one. I decided I wanted to break my own heart and here I am to do that so. ergo I do not own the song nor the original concept nor httyd akckcja

also I find writing vader exceedingly difficult thank u send tweet

my apologies for reappearing just to drop a mediocre fic

The stormtroopers took your saber when they captured you.

You had tears in your eyes as they ripped the blade from your grip, but you couldn’t do much about it, with force blockers around your wrists. You just had to watch as they carried away the last remaining piece of your husband.

You hadn’t seen Anakin since he left for Mustafar, intent on ending the Clone Wars. The last time you’d seen Obi-Wan, he told you that Anakin had been killed there, when a sith named Darth Vader struck him down.

Ever since, you’ve been hiding out. Hoping to escape the Jedi hunter who killed your husband. He was ruthless, and powerful, but you did your best to stay among the crowds, unseen, unnoticed.

Unnoticed was a word for it- you weren’t in Jedi robes, and you no longer had your saber. Being dragged through the bowels of an empire ship, stormtroopers flanking you on all sides, you looked like any other prisoner.

You got a cell far, far in the corners of the ship, like they were trying to bury you away. You took the steps down and into the cell and stood amongst it as the troopers left.

Your saber... who knows what they’d do with it. You’d made it with a piece of metal that Anakin had given you, a piece of scrap he’d found on one of his Padawan journeys with Obi-Wan. Nothing else... you had nothing else. You had nothing else of him. And now, your saber was gone, too.

So, your final few hours. You were caught as a Jedi, labeled a traitor to the empire. You were in the ship of Darth Vader, Jedi hunter. You were facing execution now, you knew it. You’d been caught.

So there was no need to hide anymore.

The cell was cold, but it wasn’t too bad. Your fingers would get chilly after a while, but for now, it was a good enough place to meditate. You hadn’t been able to take that risk in so long.

You sat down in the center of the cell, opening yourself to the force for the first time in years.

It was painful, at first. You felt great grief, all around you, surrounding you. It was familiar, too familiar, it brought you right back to the moment that Obi-Wan told you Anakin was dead.

But this was different.

It was a universal grief, one much bigger than one man. It was like a mourning of the force itself, mourning her lost Jedi, mourning each of the thousands of them.

You closed your eyes, feeling like you were leaving the cold cell, becoming bigger than it. You reached out to the ship, to the troopers who wouldn’t know the difference, the millions of miles of wiring working through the cruiser. You felt the metal, the heat, the drone-like worksmanship from the pilots and the sanitation crew.

And then you felt the anger. Rage, the likes of which you hadn’t felt in quite a while. It startled you, tossing you out of your meditation. You opened your eyes and fell backwards, catching yourself with your palms on the floor. And then the door opened.

You jumped to your feet, staring up at the imposing figure in the doorway. A black cape, a saber at his waist, and a menacing helmet.

He took a step into the room, and you took a step back. The door closed behind him.

“(Y/N) (L/N), Jedi scum,” Vader said, his voice deep and scratchy, even through the vocoder of his helmet.

“Lord Vader,” you answered, pressing your back against the wall. There was something to the area around him, the force felt so... unsettled. It was like he both channeled and reflected it, pulling it toward him and pushing it away. Like he was fighting it.

And yet... there was something familiar about him. Your gaze slipped back to his saber, which seemed so oddly familiar. His presence, as well. It made something in your mind ring, as though your own body felt him familiar, too.

How could that be?

“Keep your eyes from my saber,” Vader growled after a few moments of silence, “you won’t be taking it. You cannot escape.”

“I’m not thinking of taking it,” you assured him, hoping not to anger him. “It just... it reminds me of my husband’s saber.”

“Husband?” Vader echoed, his body unmoving. You wished he could at least take off the helmet so you could see his facial expression. “Jedi aren’t meant to marry.”

“I know,” you breathed out, trying to keep eye contact with the disturbingly familiar man, even through his helmet. “But I did.”

There was a moment in which the only thing you could hear was the humming of the ship. And then he turned, his cape spinning behind him, and made his way to the door.

Your husband- you would marry him again, if you could. He was the love of your life, and that was never going to change.

Your wedding, the most beautiful day of your life. Padme’s villa on Naboo, a gorgeous lakeside view, a beautiful ceremony, even if the both of you were still tainted with your padawan hairstyles. But then, later that night, sitting around a fire with a song you would go on to sing together every night you had to yourselves amidst the war. A song you’d develop a dance to, a song you could still hear in his voice, if you listened hard enough.

As Vader approached the door and began punching in a code, you turned your head to the side, closing your eyes.

“I’ll swim and sail on savage seas,” you began, whispering it under your voice, barely even melodic. You hadn’t intended for Vader to even hear you.

“With ne’er a fear of drowning, and gladly ride the waves of life, if you would marry me.” You glanced back up, seeing Vader frozen at the door. When you didn’t continue, he turned his head back toward you with the slowest movement.

“No scorching sun, nor freezing cold, will stop me on my journey...” Your nerves got the best of you and you trailed away, no longer having the bravery to continue, the strength. You couldn’t cry in front of Darth Vader.

“...if you will promise me your heart...” came that rasping voice, and you snapped your head up. A shuddering breath escaped the vocoder of his helmet as he lifted his hands to its sides, lifting it from his head.

He turned his gaze to you, and your heart pounded harder with every feature you recognized. His face was scarred over from burns, his neck crossed on each side of his throat with thin surgery scars. His eyes were yellow and red, but that much was expected from Darth Vader. His hairline was mottled with scars where the scalp hadn’t healed enough to grow hair, and the rest was unkept, but still it was a familiar gold.

“And love me for eternity...”

Your eyes widened and your hands lifted up, reaching forward to his face, tears already welling in your eyes. Anakin, Anakin was alive, he’s right here. Your husband is alive. You cupped his face, rubbing your thumbs over his cheekbones. His voice was different, rougher, deeper, but still you heard him. His eyes closed slowly, his face lowering into your palms.

“My dearest one, my darling dear, your mighty words astound me...” You took a deep breath to steady your voice, overwhelmed with relief, emotion, surprise. “But I've no need for mighty deeds when I feel your arms around me.”

Anakin’s eyes opened, and they were blue, that blue you hadn’t seen in so long, that blue you adored. A low smile pulled at his lips, one you never thought you’d see again, and he took his arms around your waist. There was a laugh to his voice as he sang.

“But I would bring you rings of gold, I'd even sing you poetry-“ You took slow steps, the cell smaller than your usual dance space, but you made do. His hands spread along your lower back, yours on his shoulders.

“And I would keep you from all harm, if you would stay beside me!”

You pulled away, taking his hand, stepping into the familiar pattern. He didn’t step as nimbly as he did when you’d last seen him, but still he tried.

“I have no use for rings of gold,” you sang, falling into the familiar patterns, his smile, the way he looked at you, “I care not for your poetry, I only want your hand to hold-“ Finally his smile brightened to what you remembered, and you took his leather-covered hand between both of yours as you sang your last line, your voice no longer timid, now loud and happy.

“I only want you near me.”

You joined his voice, finally twirling in the circles you never thought you’d have again, holding the man you thought you’d lost.

“To love and kiss, to sweetly hold, for the dancing and the dreaming-“ His leather glove, after all this time, hadn’t changed. Did he wear the same one?

“Through all life's sorrows and delights, I'll keep your laugh inside me.” His voice wasn’t exactly the way it’d been when you’d seen him last, but still, it blended perfectly with yours. Six years... it had been six years.

“I'll swim and sail on savage seas, with ne’er a fear of drowning,” You took a spin, like walking on air. He stepped around you, never letting go of your hand.

“I'd gladly ride the waves of life, if you will marry me!” With the last word, he lifted you up by the waist, pulling you against his body, your knees only just on either side of his hips. Mostly, he held you up on his own, your forehead pressed to his. You’d missed that smile so much.

Your husband is alive. Anakin Skywalker is alive. You couldn’t help your breathy laugh as you settled your weight against his chest, cupping his cheeks.

“Oh, Anakin...” you breathed, closing your eyes, and for one blissful moment, all was perfect.

He dropped you.

You looked up, startled, into yellow eyes. His expression was blank, his glaze flitting over you. He turned with a whip of the cape that forced you to step back, and before you could say a word, he clipped the helmet back over his head.

He only gave you one more look before he disappeared out the door, shutting it behind him.

And now the cell felt so much colder.

-🦌 Roe

#anakin x reader insert #anakin x jedi reader #anakin skywalker x jedi reader #star wars anakin #anakin imagine #anakin x reader #anakin skywalker imagine #darth vader #suitless vader #vader x reader #vader reader insert #gn reader

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monsoonblooms12 · 3 years

Text

Priyotomo (Ethan Ramsey x f!MC)

Summary: The Last Day at Amazon and Ethan's first day back at Boston from Ethan and Pooja's POV

Priyotom(o/a): (Bengali) Dearest, Most Beloved

A/N: Time for another hopeless attempt at poetry!! Anyway, this is my take on Dr Ethan Ramsey running to the Amazons. I really hope that this is not absolute crap and makes so sense🧡

Thank you so much to Simone for Pre-reading! Love you Gurl🧡

If you enjoyed the story, please like it, leave a comment or reblog. Your feedback keeps me going🤎

Pairing: Ethan Ramsey X f!MC (Pooja Sharma)

Word Count: around 1.8K

Rating: General

Category: Angst

Warnings: (Very Brief) Mentions of blood, fainting and drinking

Title Inspo: Priyotomo Hai - Rabindra Sangeet (Rabindranath Tagore's composition)

OTHER WORKS

Pooja

16 years.

The date was displayed with vivid eloquence by the woody beige cubes that adorned the desk, posing a match with the minimalism of the room.

It was a preposterous fact.

Glassy ambers switched perspective in a progressive motion, and they interpreted the solitary shine of the table lamp on the transparent surface.

Four glowing smiles, two tiny toddlers sat on their parents' lap.

It does not feel surreal. Neither a tale of a bygone era.

It was not her past. It was her present, her life's gears were turned by this very photograph.

Her bracelet adorned hand held it close to her heart, which beat in a meteoric rhythm.

The cacophonous tunes from the fiesta painfully pierced through her reverie, cajoling her to close the mahogany doors that lead to her cocoon.

The flamboyant kantha stitched lehenga proved to be burdensome to carry.

With ponderous steps, Pooja settled down on the couch, pulling her feet to herself.

She wanted to be ten again. Not eleven.

Terminate the time when she could be that blithe girl, rolling dices with her mother.

But there was a specific reason why the reminisces came back stronger than any usual day.

Somewhere in the remote land, in a cholera-stricken district, a summery blue-eyed man spent his days in seclusion.

And occupied the chambers of her cerebral hemispheres.

What was the pain of being left alone with only emotions as a companion without as much as a message?

She wiped her cheek, only to discover the black of her eyeliner now adorning her fingers.

She had been crying.

When? She could not feel the tears that left smokey meanders on the map of her face.

The heartbreak and the circumstances had numbed her feelings. All she wanted was an embrace.

Why did his peach lips mark her as his if this was the end in sight?

She refused to accept it. The end.

She placed her foot down, not feeling the pierce of a pin fallen down against her skin.

Drops of scarlet marked her track as she retouched the smear of her face.

Time to go and socialize.

Ethan

Of everything to look at in the shiny cellular, his eyes now traced the pristine form of the lady who now inhabited every one of his senses.

The comely picture made her look ravishing and the adamant neurons started pulling out manila folders with her memories kept in them.

No. He cannot.

The fiery golden liquid disappeared faster than it had been poured.

He had found himself on the crossroad of whether to type out the words that played in a loop in his mind or not.

I miss you!

He always chose the latter.

He had already given her a false hope.

Of a future of them.

He did not want to do it again.

Only now he realizes that it was a hope he had given himself as well when he first took that sacred form of hers into his arms.

And that he ran away. Like a coward.

Ethan Ramsey the coward.

Who could not fight for them.

Who could not fight for her.

Who could not fight for Lo-

No.

He did not let the word complete. The very thought was dangerous.

Throwing the classy cylinder he had been holding with a deathly grip, he poured the last bit of that glass bottle in him.

And walked over hurriedly, the tiny glass pieces stabbing him, to again begin the reset.

One which would never complete.

Next Day

Pooja

The ethereal moon spread out the beams of serenity all over the ceremonious night.

It was a lively affair. Merrymaking and cultural programs went on, as she stood amidst the cheery atmosphere with a sombre expression.

In front of Pooja, was the masterfully sculpted idol of the Mother Goddess, standing majestically as the centrepiece of the celebration. She was the epitome of power, the Mahisasura Mardini.

The recollections of an unforgettable past come as paper-planes drifting in a gentle air, carrying the playfulness, a child's happy smiles. A time when her mother would take Pooja to the mythological lands through her words, and they would get lost like flying butterflies in fairytale land.

The tunes of Bengali music float in the gentle air, and she hums along. The first song her mom had taught her, also for a Durga Puja function. Her mom was deeply rooted in all of them, the culture of Bengal kept alive by her. She was the reason why Pooja could become a part of a community she takes pride in.

Even now, so many years later, things don't change. They hold on to these roots like they are holding onto their life, not letting them disappear.

It feels like holding onto her, keeping her alive.

Recreating a small piece of her favourite Kolkata in Bhopal.

But the aura of calm hid like the clouds covering the sun's shine. The piercing pain of heartbreak came back, the wound untreated.

The soft sand of her life's hourglass prickles, solitary grains floating to join their siblings. The wish of them defying gravity and going back to bring the 10th year of her life had never been so strong as it was now.

The heavy jewellery tugged at her ears, letting her know their presence and the styled hair gave her a throbbing headache.

Her tiredness and exhaustion, now fuelling back in her veins refusing to let her bring back that sense of peace she experienced moments ago.

Around her people wore phoney smiles. All they cared about was unimportant Tommy rot. Not a single one of them stepped back from criticizing the others behind their backs.

It was a saga of inflated egos, of constant competition, to make the next person look inferior.

She was tired.

Of people running away, Of abandonment, Of hopes getting dashed.

Why did his thoughts keep coming back? After all, he did make it clear, didn't he?

But did he really succeed? Did his efforts head? Did his heart finally give in to his relentless demand?

Did he really forget her?

All the messages that lay not replied, unheard voicemails, she was sure he had.

But that colour of his he left on her?

The piece of his heart that was protected by her?

Would he be able to forget them?

An earthen lamp flickered in front of her, bud she did no rush to save it.

If it goes out, then let it.

Just like the never-ending load shedding of her life.

But it didn't.

It was a wish, a hope that kept it alive.

The sweet nothings he had whispered to her, the gentle kisses he lined on her forehead.

They had promised her forever.

His being enveloped her, she doubted if it would ever break.

The hope of him & her flickers every now and then, just like the earthen lamp.

But did it go off?

It couldn't.

Because there was no wind strong enough to extinguish it.

The possibility of him and her.

The realization and a blackness hit her at the same time.

And as she fell, her mind held on to only it.

The possibility of him and her.

Ethan

If the Great Thinkers from BCs before were asked if going to a beer garden after spending 2 months in another continent and a 13hr long flight was a sensible thing to do, they would have watched the questioner in bewilderment.

And he agreed. He was not being sensible, not even 1%.

The urge to see her, to gaze at her moonly face, to know that she okay.

It had never been so strong. He felt his mind would give up on him if he could not locate her today.

Not that he had stopped the forgetting process, absolutely not.

It was just a solace, a bandage to the scars he had given himself.

That she would be okay even if he was not there with her.

Focus fixed on keeping his gaze as unhurried as possible, he looked around, putting the well-trained ears and eyes to work.

And then he saw them.

All her friends clustered at a table, merrily clinking beer bottles and sharing happy glances. His eyes pierced into the scene, but he could not locate her.

A step or two brought him close, the desperateness making his heart go crazy.

But the conclusion shattered every bit of sense and calm, dissipated the hope of getting to see here.

She was not here.

His face fell like someone who had lost the thing they hold the closest to their heart.

She, really, was not here.

He really wanted to ask the residents sitting at the table in question, to get some, any, news on her.

But his rational mind still existed, and it was the only thing that stopped him from going haywire.

She was not here.

He took out the notorious cuboid chiming in his pocket, full of satirical typed phrases his cerebrum refused to decrypt.

But it was adamant to get his attention.

A scoff escaped like a habit.

As if anyone could be powerful enough to take his attention away from her.

He was caught in a maze of her memories, his time in the continent thousands of kilometres away and the ghoul of feelings chasing him deeper into it, making him yearn for her solace, the moistness of a forlorn kiss on his forehead, the gentle swipe of a thumb to take his tears away.

His way was lost in there, every turn making him end up more challenged. But even if he did not want to, he had to find the way out.

His soul was like a thorn who could only hurt the tender flower that she was.

What he did not realize was that she was a rose, her being was amidst thorns.

She had the power to beautify them.

The click of the turn-on sound, brought him back to the piece of work his fingers were creating on the light emanating screen.

And in seconds that passed too fast, he saw his heart's treasure,

She was here.

Not in footsteps & whispers.

She was here.

Not in touches and kisses.

She was here.

Not in muscle and bone.

But in labyrinths of his heart, in filmstrips of his memory, in sensations that made him go wild,

She was here.

(With him forever, she was not the one to leave his side)

PS: I HC the end of 1st year of their residency being in Sept-Oct, which is the time of Durga Puja in India. And since Poo is half Bengali, and she never misses any tradition involving her mom's side of the fam, so she would not have been at Boston then. (Or take it as an excuse to increase angst potential) Anyway, Thank you so much for reading and I hope you have a great day ahead! Love, Manamee🧡.

Tags (Please let me know if you want to be added or removed or if I forgot you I feel like my brain has short-circuited and I forgot someone):

Perma: @gkittylove99 @neotericthemis @udishaman @aestheticartsx @twinkleallnight @schnitzelbutterfingers @sophxwithers @sweatyrysconnoisseur @nikki-2406 @choicesfanaf @trrfanaddict @starrystarrytrouble @gardeningourmet @parkbarks @mvalentine @lovablegranny @mercury84choices @helloayz

Open Heart (All fics and edit): @lucy-268 @maurine07 @bellcat2010

Ethan x Pooja (fics): @aleynareads @stygianflood @choicesaddict5 @mysticaurathings @jamespotterthefirst @ilikemenbutonlyethanramsey

@choicesficwriterscreations @openheartfanfics

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missmizzmozz · 4 years

Text

Hello and welcome to an in-depth(?) analysis of Stand Tall from Julie and the Phantoms.

I am very tired but I had an epiphany in the shower so I’m going to try and gather the mushy pieces of my goblin brain so I can share my thoughts on the underlying meaning in this song. It’s very likely that someone else has similar ideas and has already talked about them but please bear with me. Here we go:

Don’t blink

No, I don’t want to miss it

I think this is talking about Julie’s fear that the boys have gone without being able to say goodbye to her. She’s performing at the Orpheum under the impression that they’ve disappeared forever so these lyrics – whatever their meaning when she and Luke wrote the song – are now very bittersweet.

One thing, and it’s back to the beginning

This might be obvious but “One thing” (C*leb’s jolts) has brought her back to the way things were at the start of the show – no mother (although she is there in spirit bc the dahlia) and no himbo ghost band.

‘Cause everything is rushing in fast

Keep going on, never look back

The difference between the Julie at the beginning of the show and the Julie who is performing this song now is clear; she’s not going to stop and break down although it’s all happened so quickly. She’s learned that even in grief she can keep on moving through life, grateful for all the love and memories she’s had with these three boys. She’s going to keep going for them.

And it’s one, two, three, four times

That I’ll try for one more night

One, two, three, four people that she’s lost: her mother, Luke, Alex and Reggie. The four reasons that she’s going to “try for one more night”. To make them proud.

Light a fire in my eyes

I’m going out of my mind

The “fire” is her passion for music that her mother helped nurture when she was alive and the band helped return to her after her mother’s death. It’s an imperative sentence which could suggest that she is asking them to give her the passion for this last performance.

Whatever happens, even if I’m the last standing

I’ma stand tall, I’ma stand tall

Whatever happens, even when everything’s down

I’ma stand tall, I’ma stand tall

The chorus is pretty self-explanatory. Julie is the last standing and she declares that she’s going to stand tall even though her heart is broken and she’s lost all hope of ever seeing the boys again.

I gotta keep on dreaming, ‘cause I gotta catch that feeling

Whatever happens, even if I’m the last standing

I’ma stand tall, I’ma stand tall

Again, I think the meaning is pretty obvious. Even without the band, Julie decides to keep their dream alive and carry on creating the music that they all share the same passion for.

And now for the moment when the waterworks start for me.

Right now, I’m loving every minute

Hands down, can’t let myself forget, no

‘Cause everything is rushing in fast

Keep going on, never look back

ALEX AND REGGIE ARE PERFORMING ALONGSIDE HER!! THEY HAVEN’T GONE!!

You can see the relief and happiness in Julie’s face when she sees them for the first time so I think these lines are a true reflection of how she’s feeling in that moment: a bit overwhelmed with emotions but still continuing to perform.

And it’s one, two, three, four times

That I’ll try for one more night

Light a fire in my eyes

I’m going to talk about the music in this bit bc I don’t really have anything new to say about the lyrics here.

The music starts to swell as Julie, Alex and Reggie wait for Luke to appear on stage with them. Julie’s voice is even stronger than before because her hope has returned. You can hear Luke’s guitar coming in and out with the melody as he fights the jolts to return to her, and you think for a moment that maybe he won’t come back in time when –

I’m going out of my mind

HE’S BACK BABYYY!!!!

Whatever happens, even if I'm the last standing

I'ma stand tall, I'ma stand tall

Whatever happens, even when everything's down

I'ma stand tall, I'ma stand tall

This time Luke is singing these lyrics. I think it’s him encouraging the band to keep going, no matter what happens at the end of this performance, even if this is the last time they’ll ever see each other again.

The serotonin when Julie and Luke start to harmonise tho. 🤌🏻

I gotta keep on dreaming, ‘cause I gotta catch that feeling

Whatever happens, even if I'm the last standing

I'ma stand tall, I'ma stand tall

THEY’RE SHARING THE MIC! The one thing that binds Julie and Luke together as friends or potentially as something more is the fact that they share the same dream and love of music so as they sing this part together, it represents the connection they share.

Like I'm glowing in the dark

I keep on going when it's all falling apart

Yeah, I know it with all my heart

Ooh, ooh

Our girl Jules is practically glowing with happiness that the boys are with her on stage. 🥺 Even though she knows it’s likely the last time she’ll ever sing with them again, she’s holding on to this moment and fully enjoying just being with her friends, her band, for one last time.

(Also the little back to back thing with Reggie at the ‘ooh, ooh’ bit just melts my heart ugh)

Never look back

Throughout the show, Luke always says that he has ‘no regrets’ in life but it’s at this moment when he is truly free from any regrets he might have had so it’s only right that he gets to belt this line.

Whatever happens, even if I’m the last standing

I’ma stand tall, I’ma stand tall

i’m full on sobbing now Alex, who has struggled with his anxieties over the uncertainty of death and how he became a ghost – not to mention all the drama with Caleb, now stands up and sings this with confidence. I like to think that this is him saying goodbye to his friends and especially encouraging Julie, telling them (and himself) that it’s going to be okay.

Whatever happens, even if I’m the last standing

I’ma stand tall, I’ma stand tall

My sweet boy Reggie... He was so scared about never seeing his friends again after crossing over so him singing this makes me so sad because it’s almost like he’s preparing himself to be ‘the last standing’ on the other side but he makes the decision to be brave and face his fears head on. 😭

Stand tall

Julie, Alex and Luke all echo Reggie because they feel the exact same way, expecting to be separated forever after this performance, but they each tell each other to’ stand tall’ no matter what.

Whatever happens, even if I'm the last standing

I'ma stand tall, I'ma stand tall

Whatever happens, even when everything's down

I'ma stand tall, I'ma stand tall

I gotta keep on dreaming, ‘cause I gotta catch that feeling

Whatever happens, even if I'm the last standing

I'ma stand tall, I'ma stand tall

They’re all singing together until the final note which Julie sings alone because she truly will be the last standing after they take their bows. I also think it’s because the boys love her so much and really want her to get the credit that she deserves, especially since they believe they won’t be around to perform with her anymore. So they let her hold that last note – really showing that SHE is the star of the show. They are HER band but she should get the last note of their final performance.

And thus ends my tired, shower-induced, emotional analysis of Stand Tall. I hope my points were coherent enough and I haven’t repeated myself too much. Basically, I’m JATP trash and Stand Tall makes me cry.

#julie and the phantoms #julie and the himbos #jatp #jatp stand tall #julie molina #luke patterson #reggie peters #alex mercer

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comfyswitcherblanketfort · 4 years

Note

This might seem like a weird request, but could you please write a fic/oneshot where Jaskier is a father to a little child who he adores. Because Jaskier as a Daddy is such an adorable idea! Thanks so much!! 😘

Oh Nonie! This had me in my feelings okay? I kept it ship free bc you didn’t mention anything but if you want a ship I’m DOWN to do more bc as much as I don’t want kids this had me all kinds of emotional. I also went with a homegrown organic modern AU if that's okay.

__________

When Jaskier saw those two little blue lines he was trembling. He didn't know, even years later, if it was out of fear, excitement, or an anxious need to start preparing. But prepared he was, or so he thought.

The first time he held his little baby girl in his arms he couldn't stop tears from rolling down his face.

Her mother was peacefully resting so he called the only other person he could think of, "Geralt she's just so pure and perfect and her hands are so little." He couldn't keep the warble out of his voice.

Geralt hummed in understanding and sniffed, Jaskier would grill him on that later, "Welcome to the Dad Club, Jask."

"Fuck," Jaskier laughed, swaying back and forth as he memorized every last feature on his baby girl's face, "Does it stop? Loving them so much it hurts?"

"No. If anything it gets worse." Geralt's laugh was interrupted by a crashing sound and dog barking, "Shit, Ciri broke something. Call you tomorrow?"

"Yeah." As the line went dead his tiny baby girl opened her eyes and he froze with the phone still pressed to his ear. All she had to do was look at him and he was already ready to do anything for this child.

He was fucked.

He was so fucking tired. This was his penance for all the mischief he caused through his life. He hadn't slept since the night before she was born and she had boundless energy.

But damn if walking her around the kitchen with her precious little hands wrapped around his fingers wasn't worth every single second. She wobbled and fell into every next step like someone drunk off their ass and nothing in the world was cuter to him. His back would most definitely ache from hunching over for so long but his spine went to shit months ago anyway.

When she made it to the hallway he gripped her wrists and swung her up in the air, her gasping laughter fuel enough for an eternity of sleepless nights and diaper blowouts.

He spun her in the air and stepped to catch her on his hip, "Now, m'lady, it's time to paint your hi-chair with expensive veg puree."

She giggled again when he booped her nose and he did his best to bottle the feeling up for later when she would inevitably scream bloody murder when bathtime was over. Or maybe because he wouldn't let her play with the milk cap. Or even because one of his rings wouldn't come off his finger.

The first morning of preschool had nearly killed him.

She was brave for Mommy, just like she always was, but when she left the room his six-year-old clung to his leg, rivers of tears running down her cheeks.

"No! Daddy stay!"

It broke his heart to peel her off his leg and kneel down next to her, holding her still too small hands in his, "It'll be alright, love. You'll forget all about me in a minute or two."

That was the wrong thing to say.

Her little bottom lip quivered and her eyes filled with fresh tears, "But- but I don't want to forget you!"

It was a few more minutes before he convinced her to explore on her own, but he didn't mind being the last parent to leave.

Geralt was with him when he picked her up, that ridiculous motorbike of his broken down again.

She was so excited to see them she jumped up and down in her place in line, waving with both hands. When they got in the car she rambled on and on, and on and on, about which toys she played with and the other kids in her class.

"Devon liked your song Daddy!"

"My song?"

"Yep. I- I-" she gasped with excitement trying to get her words out as fast as she thought them, "-when I miss you I sing 'Taur Song' and-and I don't miss you too much."

Jaskier had to bite down on his cheek to keep from crying, rubbing his chin and resisting the urge to scream.

"Awww. Well, that's very nice of Devon." Geralt cooed, then turning to Jaskier murmured, "You need to pull over?" with a knowing grin.

"I'm fine!" He squeaked before taking a big calming breath, "You sing the Guitar Song when I'm not around?" He called to the backseat, glancing in the mirror.

"Of course, darling silly!"

Jaskier was melting.

"Ooohhh, Jask," Geralt laughed, "She's a mini you times two."

They came to a red light and Jaskier took the opportunity to rub his face, not so discretely wiping tears away.

"Daddy, are you sad?"

Jaskier smiled, reaching back to squeeze her little calf, "No, darling. I just love you so very much."

#the witcher #the witcher fic #jaskier #jaskier fanfic #jaksier fic #jullian alfred pankratz #the bard boy #pappa jaskier #dad!jaskier #listen im not tagging it daddy jaskier bc we all know thats a v different vibe

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carinyms · 3 years

Text

(I don’t know if anyone who follows me even watches Loki, but if you do and feel compelled to analyze it with someone please hmu, because no one I personally know cares about this show and listen I care SO MUCH)

Anyway, here’s an extremely disjointed thought dump on episode three, it’s a lot :)

1. I got so much serotonin from them playing that Hayley Kiyoko song over the opening credits, oh my god.

2. I love Sylvie, I LOVE her. Just an iconic badass—so snarky, so powerful. 10/10. (When she took that cape off?? That outfit?? This whole show is just Bi Panic for me) I’m sure they’re setting her up to be very sympathetic and then she will inevitably stab Loki in the back at some point, and you know what that’s fine.

3. Their screen chemistry and banter is incredible, nearly on the same level as the scenes with Mobius and Loki. (Which is good bc speaking of which, I miss Owen Wilson). I can’t wait till we get a scene with all three of them working together, it will be fantastic.

4. God, I want to see Loki truly in full power just annihilate someone in a fight just once. I do think it’s purposeful that we’re not seeing that right now — the writers can’t seriously think the audience collectively forgot that this guy took down 5 (6?) dark elves with his hands bound and now he can’t throw a knife and hit a target that's not even moving?? There has to be a reason. I’m choosing to have faith in Kate Herron here. (But I’m tired of seeing him getting tossed around like a sack of potatoes :( )

5. I think Sylvie explaining how to enchant someone has to be foreshadowing, right? By the end of the series, either Loki will have puzzled out how to do it and tap into Sylvie’s mind, or vise versa, Sylvie will get into Loki’s head an unearth something nasty (This is SO dumb of me to hope for, I’m setting myself up for disappointment, but maybe Thanos memories here?? I’m really going full fanfic narrative with this one lol but wow can you imagine.)

6. Or, Loki will use this tactic to get into Mobius’ head and wake him up to the truth. (Also, can we talk about how concerned he was when he was like, ‘But the TVA workers don’t know they’re variants!!” Loki you little SOFTIE. Headcanon that he’s now not gonna want to hurt any of the TVA workers because they’re all brainwashed and our guy knows a thing or two about that?? BEGGING the show to acknowledge this. (Please, could we have a little bit of recognition of trauma Marvel? As a treat?)

(I will be let down lol)

7. Speaking of the brainwashed TVA workers, I have questions about how this works. Mobius remembers jet skis, but Casey didn’t know what a fish was? Is it just because Casey doesn’t work in the field? Does Mobius just have a stronger mind that Ravonna has to keep continuously wiping because he remembers snippets? That would explain the multiple water rings on her table they drew attention to— but why would the TVA let him have that magazine if they didn’t want their agents remembering anything??

8. Also, uhh…Is Ravonna a timekeeper? This is a theory that keeps popping up for me.

9. Loki and Sylvie’s conversation on the train was wonderful.

10. We LOVE a confirmed Bicon.

11. Him talking about and remembering Frigga, and his viewpoint on love feels like lines out of a fanfic come to life and I love it. Part of me is like “this level of vulnerability feels OOC” (and don’t get me wrong, there are plenty of other things that felt truly OOC) but this particular aspect feels more like we’re seeing a more apathetic, carefree, nihilistic version of Loki than we’ve ever seen, so maybe he’s just given up on the masks? Anyhow, I love this side of his character we’re seeing.

12. Loki singing in Norwegian. That is all.

12.2 Actually no, that’s not all. It had such ‘Aragorn singing at his coronation vibes’, in that it both caught me extremely off-guard and got me very emotional. Apparently the lyrics (someone translated) are all about missing home, and wow he’s really just missing his family and a sense of belonging *so much* that he’s chosen to recreate what I’d imagine an Asgardian party was like — getting drunk (although he clearly wasn’t drunk, just acting drunk), singing asgardian songs, smashing the glass on the ground and saying “Another!” (Which we can now assume was just an asgardian custom at parties bc how would he have known Thor did that?) Someone pointed out the planet that they’re on is called Lamentis, and dang this whole episode is all about Loki grieving and longing for what he’s lost? and I’m so hyped for when they end up in Asgard again. I don’t know what will happen but there will be Angst and tears, perfect recipe for a good time.

13. Speaking of Thor, is he going to tell Sylvie about him at some point? Because I will cry. Like, I guarantee it.

14. My only gripe here is that drunk Loki was giving me big Jack Sparrow energy towards the very end and I am Not About That

15. Why does Sylvie understand Norwegian?? This song meant something to her too, clearly, she was getting teary eyed, like it was something she was familiar with and I just have so many questions about how her timeline was different/similar.

16. And going off that, I’m just going to say it—I DON’T UNDERSTAND HOW VARIANTS WORK. Because if a variant is created by someone branching from their ‘true path’, wouldn’t every variant have the same base-story? Thus all look the same, have a similar past? (The same parents, the same origin?) I know the TVA’s sacred-timeline thing is all BS, that much is obvious—and Sylvie’s history is making me wonder (that is, if she truly IS a Loki ‘variant’), is the TVA’s description of branched timelines really accurate at all, or are some variants from a fully alternate reality overlapping with this one? I’m trusting they will make this make more sense.

17. I love the moments of humanity we’re getting from Loki, but especially the one where he’s surveying all those people in the town and goes “they’re gonna let these people die…” Like, what a great comparison to Loki in Ragnarok, who goes back and rescues his people because he couldn’t let them die in good conscious when he could do something about it. I like to think that being raised as a prince, there is an inherent feeling of ‘rulers should look after their people” buried under everything, and that what was going through his head was “how could they abandon these people without thought?” I love that even though that was a different Loki, they’re showing (not just telling) that the core of him truly does care about people, and the person he developed into in the original franchise is still there.

18. Also that line perfectly sets up what I’m sure is going to happen in the next episode—that they’ll find a way to escape the planet and save the people (or some of them), which will create a branch and alert the TVA to where they are, thus Loki getting brought back in.

19. the Rolled Up Sleeves look is. mhmm. It’s Good.

20. LOKI CATCHING THAT WHOLE BUILDING WITH HIS MAGIC???? BYE

Alright I’m done now, this was so chaotic, but also I really just wanted to document my thoughts on the show for myself so it's fine

#really shouting into the void with this one #but you know what I spent like an hour trying to organize my thoughts (with mild success) so I'm gonna post it dammit #today is the day I stop being afraid of interacting with anyone on this website #(is it tho)#loki spoilers #loki series spoilers #my disaster son has a show

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vnderoo · 4 years

Text

a/n: hi this is my first tumblr imagine i’ve ever written so pls don’t butcher me. i also left y/n gender neutral bc idk how each of you reading this identify and it’s not fair of me to just assume. :)

word count: 1.7k

sweet melody || h.h.

In a whole other life, there was this boy that I knew

Let’s start from the beginning.

y/n and Harry went way back. They grew up together–attached by the hip. Wherever he was, they would be and vice versa. Their parents were close to one another so the two spent more than enough time together. Harry, Sam, and y/n considered themselves the “Three Musketeers”.

As year 5 approached, the small clique made a solemn oath to be best friends forever. No matter the highs and lows, they were always going to be there for one another.

Year 10 was when things started changing for everyone. Feelings were being developed and fears came into play.

y/n was under the impression that Harry went on a date when in reality, he was out with his other friends.

“I don’t know why I’m jealous. I shouldn’t be feeling this way.” they paced back and forth.

“Maybe you like him.” Sam said, unphased.

“What?”

“Don’t act like you don’t know what I’m talking about. I see it all.” y/n was still confused. “Alright, let me elaborate.” Sam stood up, “you look at him as if he were the only person in the world, you laugh at his jokes when they aren’t even close to being funny. You lie and say his cooking is good when you know it’s criminal–Tess could cook better than him and she doesn’t even have opposable fingers.”

“That’s just me trying to boost his confidence a little.” y/n shrugged.

“y/n, when you talk about him, your eyes glow. You’re a lot more attentive when it comes to him compared to when it comes to me–which is offensive by the way.” Sam only had platonic feelings for y/n.

“You know I love you both.”

“But it’s different with him. Everyone sees it. You, my friend, are just in denial.”

What y/n didn’t know was that Harry felt the same way.

He made me feel like a woman, we were young and silly fools

“I just don’t want this to change our friendship.” y/n sighed.

“Listen, I love you, way too much, to let our relationship fail. And if it does, which it won’t, I’m not going to let you go. We’ve been friends for too long for us to just part ways.”

“What if we do break up and it makes everything awkward for Sam? I don’t want him to be put in that position.”

“Everything is going to be okay, I promise.” he kissed her head.

Gave him too many chances, push my keys too many times Anyway, he'd start acting up, and I'd be on my way to leave

Duty would call and Harry’d have to leave for work. Whether it be for his own work or to tag along with Tom on his press tour(s). y/n understood that. But there were also things that they didn’t understand about it all.

“Harry, I get that you have to go for months on end, but never talking to me? It’s like I don’t even matter to you anymore.”

Harry turned around, “What? Of course you matter to me.”

“It doesn’t feel like I do.” y/n tried to keep their composure but the more the argument went on, the more they wanted to break down. They were frustrated. It seemed like nothing they said was landing on Harry and he wasn’t really listening. “While you’re gone, I don’t get a call or so little as a text from you.”

“I text you ‘good morning’ and ‘good night’. What more do you want from me?”

At this point, y/n just wanted to lay in bed and cry this away. This didn’t feel like the Harry that left all those months ago. Things that y/n had been feeling for so long are finally coming to the surface. They felt sidelined, they felt sad, they sometimes felt like a burden.

“I want to hear about how your day went. I want to hear about how the tour is going or how your videos or pictures are coming along. I just want to hear you talk. I want to be part of your life but you’re making it impossible to do so. I sit here, stressed, not knowing how you’re doing, not knowing if you’re okay. The amount of work I have to consume myself in to get away from reality for a bit is too much, Harry.”

Sang me sweet melodies But the day he did me wrong The song couldn't go on and on

This was it. This was their breaking point. Neither of them wanted to admit it but they knew it was happening. The relationship was dying and there was nothing they could possibly do to save it anymore. It didn’t matter how much or how little either one of them wanted to fix this, things were too damaged to be fixed.

“I can’t… I can’t do this anymore.” y/n cried, “I can’t sit here and wait for you to come home all the damn time. Sometimes Sam doesn’t even know where you are so I can’t even get peace from him even if I wanted to. But even Sam has talked to you more than I have in the several months that you’ve been gone. This is the longest conversation we’ve had since you left.”

“Then maybe it wasn’t meant to be.” Harry yelled. “Maybe we were fools to fall in love with each other and pursue this relationship. We shouldn’t have pushed for it but we did and look at where it’s gotten us.”

Four years of pure bliss had been tainted by his words. y/n was hurt.

“That��s because you stopped trying.” y/n walked out the door and didn’t turn back.

Yes, when he came along, that's when I lost a groove There was no song in the world to sing along or make me move

The first few months post-breakup, y/n didn’t do anything. They had little to no motivation to do anything. All they did was lie in bed and watched the days go by. They were emotionally drained.

They found it difficult to move on because they spent four years only knowing Harry. His touch, his scent, his smile, his essence. They didn’t know how or when to start dating again. What was considered the “right time”? Everything now seemed suffocating and confusing.

As more months went by, y/n realized that this wasn’t the end of the world. They were going to meet other people and move on from this relationship. This breakup was nothing but another bump in the road, as people often say. They were going to fall in love again and it’s going to hurt just as bad, but it was time to move on.

He used to sing me sweet melodies He played me, made me believe it was real love

It’s been a couple years since y/n and Harry spoke to each other directly. They still kept up with each other, but they never talked. They only ever really asked about each other through Sam or their parents. Much to both of their dismay, this relationship took a negative toll on their friendship. The Three Musketeers were no more. The promise the three of them made all those years ago was broken.

Sometimes y/n would go into town and remember all the shops that they went into with Harry. All the memories they shared just walking through the town. Conversations they’d had about the oddest things.

Harry still had pictures of them on his phone. A reminder of the relationship he once had with y/n, both the times before and after they started dating.

It would be pointless to pretend that they didn’t miss each other. It was apparent to them and everyone they surrounded themselves with. Their friends and family would urge them to talk to each other but they always said no. Why? Harry didn’t want to because he would then be reminded that y/n was right when they said he gave up on them. y/n always said no because they didn’t want to be reminded of how they felt up until the end of the argument the day of the breakup.

Sam finished culinary school and was holding a gathering to celebrate the occasion. Of course y/n was going because 1. it gave them a reason to dress up and 2. Sam was their best friend and emotional support system throughout the time that they were processing the breakup. He was their best friend. They knew that Harry was going to be there but they weren’t going to let that stop them from going.

y/n was standing in line to get a drink when Harry had approached them.

“Hey.” he gave a sheepish smile.

“Hey.” y/n replied. They wanted to crumble into his arms and have him hold them as he used to. They were finally seeing each other in person for the first time in forever.

“You look nice.”

“Thank you.” y/n looked at him, “I like your sweater.”

“How’ve you been?” he asked.

“I’ve been good. and you?”

“Hanging in there.” the two stood there in silence before he spoke up once more, “I miss you.”

y/n sighed, “me too.”

They both knew that each person meant it platonically. The final moments of their relationship was so destructive that it led to them not being friends anymore.

“We should hang out some time or something. Grab a bite to eat.”

Going out with him would just bring more chaos into their lives. Never ending questions of whether or not there’s room to get back together would pop up from everyone around them. Their relationship wasn’t something that they needed to be reminded of, all the good and bad.

“I… I gotta go. It was good seeing you again though.” y/n smiled and walked away. They wanted to be part of his world again but there was no room for it. They were walking away from someone they once loved for so long and for some strange reason, they were content with it.

The song couldn’t go on and on and on, no

#harry holland #harry holland imagine #harry holland x reader #harry holland x y/n #stream sweet melody

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marveloussupernerd · 4 years

Note

OKAY. The only reason I’m sending this into you is because you seem to also be a fan of Taylor’s music. I hope you don’t mind! :)

This isn’t really a request, more like 2 random HCs I had while listening to Evermore. I’m not asking you to writing anything if you don’t want to. I just thought they were interesting!

Senario 1: what if in the RFA-universe MC was their version of Taylor Swift.

(Meaning her music was known world-wide, she had a massive fan base, she was known for writing stories about her personal life experiences and any album she released would go #1 immediately). Imagine one day she is sitting at the piano writing a song about a young women who turned down her engagement to the love of her life because she was suffering with mental issues (Champagne Problems). IMAGINE how sad the RFA+V+Searan would be when they think she is writing this from personal experience.THEY WOULD BE SO SAD. LMAO.

Senario 2: this one is a little more angsty

Imagine Saeyoung has been working on a task Jumin gave him for the past month. Imagine MC writing Tolerate It while sitting alone on the roof or in their shared bedroom. Imagine her telling herself that it’s all in her head but her insecurities get the better of her. Imagine Searan not knowing how to help but trying his best. Now I’m just sad..... T-T

bOnuS: imagine their reaction to No Body, No Crime. They would be like: “Mc? Did you kill someone?????” Lmao.

Wow genius stuff right here ! Also YES I love Taylor Swift... I have since fearless but honestly I’ve only listened to the entirety of her newest 3 albums oops

This will be multiple parts, also headcannon style? Imma play around w that tell me if you hate it tho

I showed this to my sister (who hasn’t listened to Taylor since 1989) and she goes you NEED to write this

MC is the in-universe Taylor Swift

Part 1: Sad Lyrics

A lot of these are them thinking the songs are about them

Zen (Champagne Problems):

He tries not to bother you while you’re writing

If you’ll let him sing with you to work on songs you’re planning on collaborating w guys on (think exile) he’s so there for you

He loves singing and has always loved your songs

But, as an actor himself, he respects the process and the alone time you need when you’re working on something new !

However

When he hears you singing Champagne Problems

Turning down a proposal because you just weren’t there mentally

Why is he... crying all of a sudden

I’ll tell you why bc if you don’t cry listening to the bridge of Champagne Problems you’re stronger than me

Waits until the piano stops

Then comes in

He has tears literally running down his face

“Zen! Are you okay?”

He plops down onto the bench next to you, pulling you into the biggest hug, which you, of course return

“We don’t have to get married. I’ll never pressure you like that. Are you okay? Do you need to talk about it?” He’s rambling

“It’s just a song Zen”

You have to rub his back to help him feel good enough to get through a sentence without crying

“I thought... I thought that really happened to you.”

Oh Zen, they’re not all based on your personal experiences

“It was so good though! It’s going to have everyone crying. Please tell me it’s on your next album.”

You have tears bc he’s so sweet !!

of course it’s on the next album

Yoosung (Coney Island):

Is dead silent when you’re writing

You literally don’t even notice he’s there

He gets jealous when you FaceTime other artists to work on a collaboration

They are literally so much better than him

And you’ve dated all these famous people

WHY are you with him !?

ANYWAYS

when he hears you playing Coney Island

He’s SOBBING

“Did I do something wrong!?”

“What? No? Of course not Yoosung”

Then why were you singing that

Not everything you write is what you’re experiencing right now

You had to explain to him that that song... you wrote it visualizing the pain you would feel if you lost him

Oh.

For real ??

And then he spirals into telling you how you’d be better off with one of your co-writers or whatever

But... you didn’t write the song thinking about your team

You wrote it thinking about him

It’s hard for him to understand

But when the album comes out... he listens to that song a lot

And still sobs like a baby every time

Jaehee (Exile):

Loves and respects your work

Not all your songs are her sort of thing

You make your newest albums a little more chill so she’ll enjoy them

You’d never tell her that though

You’re literally in a call with the guy you’re collaborating with working on exile

Singing about a failed relationship... for the second time

And experiences with bad relationships in general

It makes her worry that she messed up

Is this about the fight you two had a few months ago!? Did she make the same mistake? Are you thinking of leaving her

Waits until the call is over

“The song sounds beautiful.” Is all she can say

But you know her

“It’s not about you Jaehee”

“I love you like crazy the song isn’t about you”

Needs lots of affirmation bc that SCARED Her

The song is so good but she can’t listen to it more than like once or twice

She’s embarrassed that she thought it was about her

Little does she know you did write some songs about her... but only the happy ones

Jumin (Tolerate It):

He’s been busy with work

Buys a radio station that only plays your music though so he can listen to you all the time

Falls asleep to your singing voice bc it’s so comforting

You’re the media’s favorite couple

They’ve been speculating the two of you have been dating for a few albums now

Paper rings kinda gave it away huh

You thought he was working

Worked through writing a song about love that isn’t well-reciprocated

Honestly... you’re crying while writing it

It’s about an ex !! But also some lines make you miss getting to spend time with Jumin

He just stands there in the doorway

He doesn’t interrupt. Waits until your done

Heart breaks to see you crying

He’s shed a tear or two

Kneels down next to the bench

“I’m so sorry” is all he can say

“No!” Another tear down your face. “It’s not about you!”

He’s gently wiping away your tears

“I haven’t been here enough for you.”

“I’m okay. It’s okay. It’s not about you.”

“But it’s a wake up call. I’m building a home office so I can spend more time with you.”

Not a bad idea.

707 (Marjorie):

IF YOU DONT CRY EVERY TIME YOU HEAR THIS SONG

Again you are braver than me

Anyways Saeyoung can’t get it through his head WHY you like him / started dating him

Your relationship is completely off the radar thanks to him

Which means you DON’T write songs about him much because you don’t want speculation

You wrote this one after you read a sad fan fiction

Sobbing

I literally can’t sing during the bridge of this song I CRY

He listens to you. As you sob through the song. About how the person’s beloved died but they can still hear her and feel her in themselves

He sniffles

Interrupts you partway through

“Baby? Are you okay?”

You sniff and nod

“Is your mom okay? Your aunt? Your friend? Did someone die? Are you alright?”

“Yeah I’m alright.”

But... you’re crying so much how are you okay

“I’m going to need to work on singing this without being emotional” you joke, wiping your tears

“Wait... it’s not my fault right? I didn’t die or anything.”

“Huh!? No. This is about a fanfic”

He laughs, pushes you lightly

“YOU HAD ME WORRIED!”

V (Illicit Affairs):

He sits with you during your songwriting process

Sometimes will even suggest lyrics to you if he’s feeling bold

He’s shocked with how quickly Illicit Affairs comes to you

Singing about breaking off an affair that has torn you apart and feels one-sided and

Uh... are you okay? You never mentioned something like this before

“My Love,” he stops you, “did this happen to you? Did somebody do this to you?”

“Oh. No I’m okay.”

You’re smiling

He was so worried

“And this isn’t about us right?”

Of course not. Everyone knows the two of you are together

“Of course not.”

He smiled. “I was worried about you.”

You giggle, kissing his cheek

“You showed me colors I can’t see with anyone else,” he recommends. “Or something like it.”

“V? Are you okay?” How the tables have turned.

“That’s how I feel about you. All love though. No angst.”

Saeran (This Is Me Trying):

This one is actually about him

You try to only work on your songs when he’s working or when he’s out

You try to spend as much time with him as possible to help with his coping process of everything that’s happened to him

But it’s easy to feel overwhelmed.

He wakes up in the middle of the night with a nightmare

Hears you singing in the other room. He knew you did this at night, it’s okay with him but... he really could use your help right now

Pads over to the door, standing outside until he can gather the courage to interrupt you

He feels pitiful

And then he hears you singing about how you’re struggling with your relationship and everything going on but you’re trying your best

He just sits outside the door. He can’t confront you right now. You’re feeling this way because of him. Maybe he deserves the nightmares

Luckily you’re planning on going to bed and see him when you try to leave the room, curled up on the floor.

“Did you have a bad dream?” You ask, joining him on the floor, pulling him close to you

All he can do is timidly nod

“Come in next time. Nothing is more important than you. I promise you that.”

He shakes his head. “I’m making things hard on you. With your job and your mental health and you trying to help someone so broken...”

His voice cracks. He wants to cry

“Saeran...”

There’s so much you could say.

This song is too sad

Later you’ll add a line about wanting him. Wanting to be with him despite all the trouble

But for now... you’ll be with him

Holding him.

Taking him to bed

Hugging him

Staying awake a little longer just in case he gets another bad dream

You were trying your best. The best thing you could do was be there by his side

He slept a little lighter. It was comforting to know that even though it was hard for the both of you, you were doing it, and you loved him

#mystic messenger #mysme #Taylor swift

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ificanthaveu · 5 years

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Make It To Christmas || Shawn Mendes

Description: Christmas is right around the corner and Shawn is nowhere to be found. You start to doubt if this was all even worth it and if you’ll even make it to Christmas. Based on the song by Alessia Cara.

A/N: I am OBSESSED with this song so naturally I had to write this and so sorry it’s late bc I was out of town and tried to do this from my phone and almost threw it out a window but here she is :)

Word Count: 3.2k

12 Days of Ficmas

We were warm and wonderful

Once upon a time

But now we're frozen, hanging by a thread

The sun started to rise past the edge of the ocean as you sat on the edge of the beach, feeling the water hit your feet every few minutes. The soft wind blew your wet hair back as you drew shapes in the sand next to you.

You heard footsteps behind you, and shortly after Shawn sat down next to you, handing you a mug of coffee. You set it in the sand next to you and rested your head on Shawn’s shoulder and his rested against yours.

“I don’t wanna leave,” you mumbled.

You could feel Shawn’s shoulders shake as he let out a laugh before pressing a kiss to your forehead.

“Our flight leaves in two hours, love,” he whispered.

“Let’s just cancel it,” you responded.

“Ok,” he said simply.

Silence came across you again as you shut your eyes, grabbing your mug and taking a sip.

“What if we did just cancel it?” Shawn said after a moment.

You sat straight up and gave him a look.

“Are you serious?” You asked with a slight smile.

“I don’t technically have to be back until Friday,” he started. “I mean, we could stay two more days.”

You leaned your chin on his shoulder and smiled up at him as he returned the look.

“Sounds perfect,” you said softly before resting your head on his shoulder again, and his arm wrapped tightly around your waist, your flight long forgotten as you admired the waves crashing against the shore.

You ran your finger along the edge of the frame that showed a picture of you and Shawn curled up on the beach just barely six months ago.

Your house felt cold for it being in California. It was dark, and you didn’t even bother turning any lights on in the house. Not even the Christmas ones.

Shawn had been gone for just over two weeks with the promise of being home exactly a week before Christmas, so the two of you could fly home to your family by December 20.

But it was December 18th, almost the 19th, and his flight was pushed back, and as you checked the weather in New York, you had a sneaking suspicion it wasn’t the weather.

You sighed and walked away from the picture, not wanting to make yourself any more upset. You sat down on the edge of the couch and pulled out your phone.

The newest message from Shawn made your heart drop.

Flights are canceled. Won’t be home until the 20th.

You buried your head in your hands and willed yourself not to cry. This was becoming everything you never wanted it to be.

You debated between calling your parents, calling Shawn or just ignoring everyone for the time being, but before you could make that decision, Shawn’s name popped up on your phone.

You hesitated before grabbing your phone and hitting the green button.

“Hello,” you said with little emotion in your voice.

“Hey, babe, I’m so sorry this is happening,” he said with just the right amount of sympathy in his voice.

“No, I get it. It’s fine,” you say plainly.

“Can we push back our flights to your parents?” He asked.

“I really don’t want to, Shawn,” you said as you ran your hand down your face.

“I don’t know what else I can do.”

“You can get on a plane, and get back home, Shawn,” you said sternly.

“Flights are canceled. It’s snowing a ton. I can’t get back,” he tried to explain.

“It’s not snowing,” you said with your anger starting to show. “I’m not stupid, Shawn. I can check the weather in New York.”

All you received on the other line was silence. You heard some rustling before it got quieter, and you heard a door shut.

“I can explain,” he said softly.

“I really don’t want to hear it,” you said before he could say anything else. “I’m flying to my parents’ on the 20th. Come or don’t. I really don’t care at this point.”

“[Y/N], I just have so much to finish before the album comes out, and -“

You cut him off.

“I’ll see you later, Shawn. Bye,” you hung up before he could say anything else.

Darling, I know that our love is going cold

It's just something 'bout the snow this time of year

That makes us lose our way, just say we'll make up

And hold on a little longer

Don't have me spending it alone

This time of year is precious

Please, can we make it to Christmas?

You sat in silence for a moment. The last of your love for Christmas was quickly slipping away.

You held your phone to your ear as you called your best friend.

“36 hours until I get to see you,” Charlotte practically yelled as she answered the phone.

You didn’t say anything.

“What’s wrong?” She said when she realized.

“Shawn’s not coming,” you said.

“What?”

“He’s in New York, won’t be back here before we can get back home,” you said, feeling your throat get scratchy.

“You’ve had this planned for months, how can he not be here on time?” She said, getting angrier about this.

“His album, I guess,” you responded.

“That’s not an excuse.”

“I know, Char,” you snapped. “I don’t know what the fuck to do.”

She went quiet, and you sighed.

“I can’t say I didn’t see this coming, but it just hurts a lot more than I thought it would,” you said quietly.

“Has it been bad?”

You shrugged your shoulders and leaned back into the couch.

“I feel like we’ve been distant. Ever since Florida, I just feel like I’ve been second to everything. And I understand that these things are important, but it’s Christmas. I thought at least we would make it until then,” you said feeling a tear roll down your cheek.

“You don’t want to break up, do you?” She asked hesitantly.

“I don’t know right now. I just think I’m wired on emotions. I can’t think straight,” you said. “I just need to be home.”

“Have you thought about moving your flight up?” She asked.

You went quiet before grabbing your laptop and pulling up your flight information and searching the next flight out.

“I can leave tomorrow at 8:00 in the morning,” you said as you booked your flight.

“Need me to pick you up?”

“Yes, please.”

Your packing was done haphazardly as you threw your planned outfits into your suitcase. You folded them as best you could before zipping up your bags and setting them by the front door.

You glanced at the clock before climbing into bed. You had to be up in four hours.

But you didn’t care, you were going home, with or without Shawn.

Well, without Shawn.

The flight home was shorter than expected, your time being occupied with thinking too much.

Charlotte waited for you at the front of the airport, wrapped up in a winter jacket and hat. You practically dropped your bags as you ran up to her and hugged her for the first time in six months.

“Holy shit, I’ve missed you,” she said against your shoulder.

“You have no idea how much I’ve missed you,” you said back.

She grabbed your bag and started walking you to her car.

“Do your parents know you came early?” She asked as she started the car.

“No, thought I’d surprise them.”

“They’re going to have questions,” she said cautiously.

“Yeah, I know. Guess I’d rather deal with it sooner than later,” you said with a sigh as you rested your head on the back of your seat.

Charlotte pulled up to your house sooner than expected. She helped you get your bags out before pulling you in for another hug.

“You got dinner plans?” She asked.

“Chipotle?” You asked back.

“Perfect,” she said before climbing into her car and waving as she drove away.

Don't know what I'll say to Dad when he sees the empty chair

Don't want to hear my mom say, "Told you so"

Waiting for Santa in my bed is no fun if you're not there

And I don't want to be angry at mistletoes

You took a deep breath as you walked up your driveway to the back door. You bumped it open with your hip and dragged your bags in, setting them just beyond the door.

You walked into the kitchen and looked around, seeing no one. You walked into the living room next to be met with the same thing.

You took a seat on the couch and tapped your arm against the couch.

You assumed your parents probably ran to the corner store, explaining why the back door was still open.

You leaned back and pulled your phone, half expecting to see something from Shawn.

But nothing.

You bit your lip and took a deep breath, flipping your phone over and staring at the ceiling.

You didn’t even notice your dad walk in.

He didn’t say anything at first as his jaw dropped. He looked to the side of you, just to see that you were alone.

“What are you doing here?” He said through a laugh after a moment.

Your head snapped up and smiled at your dad.

“Thought I’d come a little early,” you said as you crossed the room and your dad pulled you into his chest.

He rocked you back and forth as his hand held the back of your head against his chest.

“Where’s Mom?” You asked as you pulled away.

“[Y/N]?” You heard your mom from behind you.

You hugged her next as you could feel her start to cry, only holding her tighter.

“I was just about to make lunch. Let’s have lunch,” she said quickly as she squeezed your hand and grabbed the ingredients she needed.

No one said anything about the clear missing piece. Your dad asked about your new job while your mom wanted to know about your redecorating you just did at your house.

You sat around the table meant for four. You all dove into the food and continued to make small talk and catch up.

Your dad left right after he was done eating to finish his last-minute Christmas shopping, leaving you alone with your mom.

The two of you sat quietly at the table before she finally said something.

“Honey, where’s Shawn?” She said softly, resting her hand on top of yours.

“New York,” you said simply. “He won’t be coming this year.”

“Is everything ok?” She asked as that look came across her face. The look you’ve been dreading.

“It’s going to be fine, Mom,” you said just a little too sternly.

She sighed and stood up, taking the dishes to the sink.

“This is what happens when you chase a rockstar across the country,” she said quietly.

“Mom,” you warned.

“I’m just saying that you had a great job here. You had a condo you loved, and friends and family around who loved you. But instead, you went and moved to California to be with him, when you hadn’t spent more than a week together at a time before that,” she tried not to yell.

“You don’t know the half of it, so please, don’t start this right now,” you said in as calm of a tone as you could muster up.

“I’m just saying-“

You cut her off, “Enough.”

You walked out of the kitchen before she could start anything else, grabbing your bags and bringing them to your room. You fell back on your bed and pulled out your phone to check Instagram just to be met with a post of Shawn in the studio with a big smile.

You threw your phone on the floor next to you as you tried to take deep breaths to make the feeling in your stomach go away.

But it was no use.

—

Shawn unlocked the front door and pushed his way into your home.

“[Y/N]?” He yelled as he dropped his bags in the living room.

He ran up to your room, opening the door just to be met with a few clothing items on the bed.

He slowly walked back downstairs to the kitchen, seeing a note on the counter.

Don’t know if you’ll even see this. If you do, I left early.

His heart dropped as he read the note over and over again.

He ran his hands through his hair and tugged at the ends, the guilt hitting him.

He grabbed his phone, logging into his account to see if he could find an earlier flight, but everything was booked.

He had already canceled his flight that was supposed to leave tomorrow.

He contemplated calling you, but he knew you wouldn’t answer. He also contemplated texting Charlotte to confirm that you were there, but he knew she wouldn’t respond either if she knew even half of what happened.

All of his questions were answered when he saw your Snapchat story of Charlotte at Chipotle.

He grabbed his laptop and tried to figure out how he could get to you within the next few days, and after hours of searching, he discovered he could take four different flights just to get to you in two days from now.

And he was going to do it.

—

Your next two days went perfectly as you shoved the thought of Shawn to the very back of your head. You visited your old job and high school, made cookies and went ice skating with your best friends and had dinner with your family.

It was almost perfect, but something was missing. You knew the answer, but you refused to say it out loud.

Your parents had left for the night, going to your dad’s office Christmas party. Tonight was the night that you and Shawn were supposed to go to the Christmas play at your high school, but that was out the window.

You curled up on the couch and turned on a Christmas movie. You wrapped a blanket around you and tried to focus on the movie, not wanting your mind to wander to places you didn’t want it to.

As it started to wander, a knock came from the front door.

You kept the blanket wrapped around you as you shuffled to the front door. You swung it open without much of a second thought.

You dropped your blanket when you saw Shawn standing in front of you. One hand held onto the top of his suitcase as the other gripped onto his backpack strap.

“Shawn,” you said under your breath.

“Hi,” he said back just as quiet.

“Why are you here?” You asked, willing your voice to stay steady.

“Because I promised to spend Christmas with you and your family,” he paused. “And because I’ve been an asshole.”

You didn’t say anything as you opened the door wider to let him in. He dragged his suitcase behind him and set it next to the door, along with his backpack, as you grabbed your blanket and sat back on the couch. Shawn sat next to you and stared straight ahead.

“Shawn, I-“ you started before Shawn cut you off.

“I’m sorry,” he said quickly. He turned to face you, pulling his knee up onto the couch. “What I did, was something I never imagined I would ever do, and I’m so sorry I did that to you before Christmas. I shouldn’t have lied to you like that, and I should’ve just told you that I needed to stay a few days longer. Hell, I could’ve just met you here and flown from New York, but I didn’t even think of that. I can’t stand the thought of you not enjoying Christmas because I was too self-centered.”

“You could’ve just told me,” you whispered.

“I know, and I’ll regret it forever that I didn’t.”

You finally turned to face him. He felt his heart sink as he saw the tears brimming on your eyelids.

“Do you know how hard it is to have to tell my parents, who were looking forward to you being here, that you’re not coming? Or trying to explain to my friends who I showed up to our plans alone?” You croaked out. “Shawn, I get that things haven’t been the best lately, but I figured we could at least get through Christmas.”

“What do you mean things haven’t been the best?” He asked with confusion on his face.

“I mean that you’ve been so caught up in everything else going on, that I sometimes go days without so much as a text from you,” you said. “I know how important this album is to you, and I know you’re on a deadline, but I just want to know that you still love me.”

“Of course, I still love you. I’m just as crazy about you as I was on my first date and as I will be for the next hundred years,” he said as he reached for your hand.

“It doesn’t feel like that lately,” you said as your tears finally fell. Shawn reached up and brushed one away with his thumb.

You leaned into his touch and closed your eyes as Shawn pulled you into his chest without another word.

“I’m so sorry. I had no idea I was even doing that. And it’s the worst excuse ever, and I hate that I didn’t realize it. I’ve been too in my head lately,” he said against your hair as he kissed your head over and over again. You could hear the strain in his voice.

“I fall more and more in love with you every day,” he said. “And I know I’m spending the rest of my life with you. And I’m going to show that so much more now.”

You lifted your head up to look at him again. His eyes were red, and you could see the slightest quiver in his lip. You gave him a soft smile, hoping it’d give him enough reassurance.

“We’ll get back to how we were a few months ago. I promise,” he said as he looked you in the eyes.

“Ok,” you said just above a whisper. “I forgive you, but I can’t keep forgiving you if you’re going to keep doing this.”

“I know, and I’d never expect that from you. You’re my priority, and I’m going to start acting like it.”

“I love you,” you finally said.

“I love you, too. So much,” he said before pressing a kiss to your forehead.

You stayed silent, curled up in his chest and praying that this was the argument that would make everything better.

“Hey,” he said softly.

You looked up at him, resting your chin on his chest.

“We were always going to make it to Christmas. We’ll make it to every Christmas for however long you keep choosing me,” he said.

Your eyes fluttered shut as you took a deep breath and nodded your head.

“I know. We’ll make it to Christmas.”

REBLOG, REPLY, SEND ME A MESSAGE, AN ASK

A N Y T H I N G

Taglist: (message/send me an ask to get added for Ficmas)

@fallinallincurls @sunrise-shawn @shawnblrficawards @itrocksmysocks @mendesficsxbombay @particularnervous @adelaidestreets @rosebudmendes @shawnwyr @dancing-oceans @illuminatepotter

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trensu · 5 years

Text

Episode 28: The One where LXC Loses his Title as Greatest Wingman

THAT’S RIGHT GUYS

WE’RE HERE

THE ONE THAT HOLDS ONE OF THE MOST PRECIOUS, CLASSIC WANGXIAN SCENES IN THE WHOLE SHOW

THE SCENE THAT JUST BURSTS WITH WANGXIAN DOMESTICITY AND WE DIE FROM THE SHEER FLUFFINESS OF IT ALL

Shockingly this VERY IMPORTANT wangxian moment doesn’t start until the 34min mark.

So we’re gonna power through those first 34min to get to the parts that actually matter

We’re still at the burial mounds

Emotional Yungmeng Bro Drama happens

It’s very upsetting

There’s a lot of feelings everywhere.

I can’t defend you if you keep this path, jc protests

You can’t defend me? Then Leave me, wwx says, tell the world i defected, he says, my actions are no longer associated with the jiang clan he says

WHO KNEW BROTHERLY LOVE COULD BE SO PAINFUL, AMIRITE GUYS? HAHA *CHOKES BACK SOBS*

LET’S SKIP AHEAD!

Jc’s gone, maybe it’ll get better now??

A-YUAN TIME!!

Oh no, little a-yuan is hungry!!

Wen qing gives him the last of the fruit because a-yuan activated her Good Big Sister instincts

Ah, look at his happy face as he takes the fruit!

The wwx shows up with MORE fruit and a-yuan does the leg-grabby thing!!

ADORABLE

Great, now we get Emotional WWX and WQ Bonding Time

SHE TRIES TO GIVE HIM AN OUT

SHE TRIES TO GET HIM BACK TO HIS FAMILY

Wwx is not having it so instead he acts all charming and teases her until the matter is dropped

I LOVE THEM SO MUCH

Other stuff happens, boring boring boring

Moving forward

Yunmeng bro fight scene!

The first half was pretty neat and then they did a bunch of funky flying moves that had me like, why, why must you do this, please stop and give me wangxiantics instead

They did not stop

But they did do some wonderful Twirling, so I guess i can forgive them a little

Oh, sadface, a paperman gets viciously slaughtered by jc

(@theuntamednarrator pointed out that this fight scene PARALLELS a future fight scene on a moonlit rooftop THAT WE’RE NOT GONNA THINK ABOUT BECAUSE IT MAKES ME SAD)

Wwx, at some point in this fight is all: oh look, i’ve been impaled

(what’s a little light stabbing between siblings, amirite?)

More stuff happens that we don’t care about

But we’ll take a moment to laugh at wwx here

Wwx is like, imma hide this gaping stab wound from the world’s greatest doctor by distracting her with potatoes

It doesn’t quite work bc wen qing immediately makes a grab for him

Wwx is scandalized!

Wwx: Men and women shouldn’t be improperly intimate!!

Wwx: you suddenly doing this makes me scared for my virtue which i’m obviously saving for lan zhan!

She backs off for half a second; then wwx winces but he recovers quickly by being all i’m totally fine, look at how fine i am, i’m flinching because of HUNGER PAINS, NOTHING ELSE

If he weren't so charming and adorable none of this would've worked

Other non-wangxian nonsense occurs

Some more non-wangxian stuff

A scene featuring Disaster Het Jin Zixuan and our Perfect Elder Sister Jiang Yanli

Jzx is all, i know carp tower isn’t your home but i’m willing to build another lotus pier here for you

...ugh, fine, okay, maybe you’ve grown on me a little by now, you huge Disaster Het BUT ONLY BECAUSE YOU’RE MAKING JYL HAPPY, YOU HEAR ME?? ALL BETS ARE OFF IF YOU MAKE HER CRY AGAIN

We’ve made it through the 34 minutes!!

GET READY GUYS

We’re at a tea house in Yiling! There’s lots of people! AND THEY’RE ALL TRASH-TALKING MY BEAUTIFUL SUNSHINE BOY WTF

But hey, look in the background is lwj, (angrily) listening to people trash-talk our sunshine boy.

God, he sits so straight, it looks almost painful

I mean, in terms of posture

We know he’s not straight in any other way lol

The only time we get full body shots of him in this scene is when he’s blurred and out of focus in the background, which is interesting

When he’s at the forefront of the scene, it’s all close-ups of his (angry) face

But even with the close ups, we only see parts of his face. One half of his face at a time, close-ups on the eyes (or one eye) specifically at times

It’s not until the end of that teahouse scene that we get to see a full shot of him and that’s only when he’s had Enough of people slandering his soulmate and slams his (poor innocent) tea cup onto the table and (viciously) glares at the gossipers

He leaves the teahouse (angrily)

Lwj is (angrily) walking through the marketplace

He walks past some random lady and the lady turns the hell around so fast and BLATANTLY CHECKS HIM OUT, oh god, that’s HILARIOUS

(you are not alone in this, lady, YOU ARE NOT ALONE)

Then, we have one of the best tropes of all, ACCIDENTAL CHILD ACQUISITION

THERE IS A CHILD CLINGING TO HIS LEG

IT’S A-YUAN

A-YUAN HAS SURGICALLY ATTACHED HIMSELF TO LWJ

WE ALL LOVE HIM FOR IT

Wwx does not notice his child is missing bc he is haggling, which is important but maybe not as important as missing a child.

Omg the look of panic on his face when he finally realizes a-yuan is gone gutted me for half a second.

REALIZING YOU’VE LOST A CHILD IN A CROWDED PLACE IS THE WORST FEELING IN THE WORLD, OKAY

But i get over this quickly bc WWX FINDS A-YUAN CLINGING TO LWJ’S LEG.

GUYS

THIS SCENE

THIS SCENE MAKES ME SO HAPPY

IT’S MADE OF RAINBOWS AND BUTTERFLIES AND ITTY BITTY KITTIES

Okay, let's break it down because there’s JUST SO MUCH GOOD STUFF HERE WE NEED TO PROPERLY APPRECIATE ALL OF IT

FIRSTLY, lwj’s face.

There is a loudly crying child clinging to his leg

He is surrounded by nosy talkative strangers (PARENT strangers!!) all Judging™ him for his (lack of) parenting skills

And lwj’s face is about as External Panic as lwj can make it bc our boy is FREAKING OUT

THERE IS A CRYING CHILD

LATCHED ON TO HIS LEG

STRANGERS ARE ASSUMING HE’S THE FATHER

BUT HE ISN’T

THEY DON’T LISTEN WHEN HE TELLS THEM HE ISN’T

THEY SAY THEY HAVE THE SAME NOSE?? THEY SAY HE RESEMBLES THIS STRANGE UNKNOWN CRYING CHILD SOMEHOW??

AND WORSE STILL, THEY’RE SAYING HE’S A BAD FATHER

THEY’RE ALL LIKE, OH LOOK HE SCOLDED HIS POOR KID AND NOW WON’T EVEN HUG HIS KID TO MAKE HIM FEEL BETTER??

HIS FACE, OMG

HIS FACE SCREAMS: DEAR GOD WHAT IS HAPPENING HOW DO I MAKE IT STOP

LWJ IS DYING INSIDE

AND HE KIND OF WANTS TO DIE OUTSIDE

(There’s one guy who kinda takes pity on him and was like, ah, he’s your first kid, huh? I was like that with MY first kid but now i know everything after my wife gave a few more births. It’s a learning process!)

And ohoho, boy, does lwj learn (later, after horrible horrible things happen)

Secondly, WWX IS HAVING THE TIME OF HIS LIFE WATCHING ALL OF THIS UNFOLD BEFORE HIM

HIS SMILE IS HEART-STOPPINGLY BEAUTIFUL

HE’S STIFLING GIGGLES

IT’S SO CUTE I WANNA DIE

Finally, wwx takes pity on poor lan zhan

I would like to point out that he takes pity on lan zhan only after the crowd of Judgy Parents start asking A-Yuan where his mother is

And like, i don’t want to fall into the pit of heteronormativity and stereotypical gender roles, BUT THAT’S HILARIOUS

Wwx: Lan zhan!

Lwj looks up and the world fades away when he sees wwx, with his cute little smile, making his way towards him in slo-mo

Like, literally slow motion and literally the world fades away until basically only wwx is in focus, THIS IS HOW LWJ SEES WWX ALL THE TIME, OMG IT’S AMAZING

AND OF COURSE ~THEIR SONG~ IS PLAYING IN THE BACKGROUND

I’M SCREAMING, EVERYTHING IS GREAT

LWJ STARES AT HIM WITH SUCH YEARNING

And even when they’re right in front of each other, they KEEP STARING AT EACH OTHER, SOAKING UP EACH OTHER’S PRESENCE

WHICH I LOVE, but also there’s a crying child right there maybe take care of him??

Wwx: lan zhan, what a coincidence! What are you doing i yiling?

WHAT DO YOU THINK HE’S DOING IN YILING, WWX

IT’S NOT LIKE HIS SOULMATE LIVES AROUND THAT AREA OR ANYTHING

Lwj: night hunt. Passing by.

Short and sweet and to the point

I’m convinced it’s because his brain has short-circuited from the double whammy of Accidental Child Acquisition and OMG My Beautiful Soulmate is With Me and Smiling

Lwj: ....this child

Wwx: ah, yes, this is MY son

I read a post on tumblr that says the actual translation of that line was more like “ah, yes, i gave birth to this child”

Which would explain lwj’s absolutely stunned and confused expression

I mean, the fact that he doesn’t immediately dismiss this as the nonsense that it is, is absolutely HILARIOUS to me

Like, for a split second there he honestly believed wwx??

He must’ve been like, wait, is this a side effect of demonic cultivation??!?!?

That doesn’t sound right but i don’t know enough about demonic cultivation to dispute it

But then wwx starts giggling at him which gives away the game

Wwx: hey, lan zhan, what did you do? Why is a-yuan crying?

Lwj: I didn’t do anything

Wwx: ah, i see what happened. Lan zhan, as pretty as you look, you still have resting bitch face.

(no for real, wwx called him pretty, i died a little when i heard him say it and i’m pretty sure lwj did too)

Wwx: a-yuan doesn’t know any better so of course he’d look at you and start crying!!

Lwj stares at a-yuan (who is now clinging adorably to wwx) and you can see in his face that his New Life Mission is to get A-Yuan to Like Him.

It is IMPERATIVE that this small child Like Him. Not for any particular reason, of course. But this Must happen.

Even if it means having to go to an Ancient Fantasy China plastic surgeon to get his resting bitch face problem resolved

THANK GOD WE DON’T HAVE TO RESORT TO THAT

Wwx kneels down to comfort a-yuan and lwj watches him interact with this small child and VISIBLY SWALLOWS before looking away

Like it was too much cute to handle

Like oh shit, i want wwx’s children

Like oh shit, i want to be a dad???

GUYS WE SEE THE EXACT MOMENT LWJ REALIZES HE WANTS KIDS

THANK YOU WORLD FOR BLESSING US WITH THIS MOMENT

Okay, quiz time!

How do we make a small child stop crying?

Answer - Distraction!

What is the best distraction for a small child?

Answer - TOYS

Wwx pulls a-yuan to a toy stall

The music here gets all upbeat and playful. (In fact, it’s the same music that played in the ‘flower petals rain on LWJ’ scene in The One where NHS is Total Cockblock omg i just had to reference my own guide to make sure that was the right episode lol this is exactly why i’m making this). I love this music!!

So they admire the toys and wwx picks up one of them and is like, do you like this one?

A-yuan of course says yes bc all kids love toys

Then wwx is like, cool, and proceeds to drag a-yuan away from the toy stall without the toy

SAD FACE A-YUAN :(

Lwj sees Sad Face A-Yuan and does the Lan Clan version of running (aka lengthening his strides and quickening his steps slightly)

Lwj: wei ying, why didn’t you buy it for him?

Dude, he sounds almost accusatory here, it’s GREAT

Wwx: ??? why should I???

Lwj: you asked him if he wanted it, doesn’t that mean you’re going to buy it?

Wwx: asking is asking, buying is buying. Who says i have to buy something just because i asked about it?

Wwx, lwj has a point tho. It’s kinda mean to lead a kid on like that

And here lwj sounds all hesitant (and shy?? maybe??) like he doesn’t want to scare a-yuan again. He looks at him briefly

Lwj: which one...do you want.

Then when a-yuan doesn’t immediately burst into tears, he speaks more confidently.

Lwj: among those, which one did you want?

And a-yuan points to the toy he wants with all the confidence small children have when they know they’re about to get exactly what they want

Omg, lwj looks at wwx as soon as he sees which toy a-yuan wants

It’s a look that says I’M GETTING THIS CHILD A TOY AND YOU CAN’T STOP ME

And wwx just beams at him like a ray of sunshine!! HE’S MELTING INSIDE, YOU CAN TELL

HE’S ALL LIKE, OMG LAN ZHAN IS SO SWEET WITH CHILDREN

OMG LAN ZHAN WOULD BE A GREAT DAD

OMG I WANT LAN ZHAN TO CO-DAD A-YUAN WITH ME

Cut to a-yuan gleefully playing with his new toys

He and wwx are play fighting with cute little wooden swords and it’s SO ADORABLE I’M GONNA DIE

And lwj watches them for moment with the FONDEST LOOK ON HIS FACE

A-yuan notices that lwj is there again and immediately ditches wwx to cling to lwj’s leg

Smart, kid, smart

Butter up the rich guy who makes wwx smile

Wwx laughs: lan zhan, congrats! My kid likes you! He only hugs the legs of his favorite people and then never lets go

Lwj: *internally probably* i wish YOU’D hug me and never let me go

Also

YES! LIFE MISSION COMPLETE. WWX’S CHILD LIKES ME

Wwx: you should ditch your night hunt and have a meal with me

Lwj: a meal?

Lwj: *internally probably* OMG DID HE JUST ASK ME OUT ON A DATE?? AND HE CALLED ME PRETTY EARLIER??? TODAY IS THE BEST DAY

He then pretends to hesitate bc YOU GOTTA PLAY IT COOL

CAN’T CLUE HIM IN ON HOW DESPERATELY YOU WANT TO KEEP HIM WITH YOU FOREVER

BE COOL, LWJ, BE COOL, BE COOL

Wwx: c’mon, we hardly see each other! We can reminisce about the old days! It’ll be my treat~!

Wwx what, YOU HAVE NO MONEY WHAT ARE YOU EVEN SAYING

Wwx grabs lwj’s arm and drags him away

Lwj’s brain rn: !!!!!!!!!!!!!!

But they run off WITHOUT A-YUAN??

Good thing a-yuan is quick on his feet, god damn

AND THAT’S THE END OF ONE OF THE BESTEST EPISODES OF THE SHOW

GOD I NEEDED THIS AFTER THE HELLSCAPE OF LAST EPISODE WHERE EVERYONE MADE ME ANGRY

And lets give a round of applause to our precious adorable A-Yuan who somehow managed to latch on to the one person in the entire town that is completely head over heels in love with wwx and who wwx has been pining for since their sad separation in the rain.

FOUR FOR YOU, A-YUAN. YOU GO, A-YUAN!!

Return to Masterpost

#WangXiantics #wangxian #the untamed #cql

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fmdminaharchive · 4 years

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007: lipstick titletracks (updated version)

wordcount: 1,549 (old: 735 & new: 814)

run devil run: when she first sees the skin-tight bodysuits, minah is a little taken aback. she’s nervous enough for her debut as it is. minah isn’t a naturally alluring person, always on the more reserved side herself, something she has to completely cast aside to suit the image of lipstick. but, luckily, run devil run feel like safe enough baby steps for minah. she gets to ease a little into what bc has in store still for her.

flashback: if run devil run was the kiddie pool, flashback is the deep end. or so minah feels at least. the song itself is nice of course, she has plenty of lines too, but it’s hard to focus on that when there seem to be much more pressing matters. flashback is everything but subtle about how sexy it is and minah has never been someone effortlessly sexy, not in her own eyes. most of the promotions, she spends worrying, about the way she looks, the way she acts, about everything but her since.

because of you: lipstick dials it a bit back again with because of you and minah is very glad for that. because of you is a slower song, bursting with emotional vocals and relatively sparse on choreography which, of course, makes it a big win in minah’s book. she enjoys performing and promoting because of you a lot but due to their debut year being such a hectic one, both in terms of comebacks and her personal life, it’s an era she doesn’t think back on a lot. a good song that got buried under less fortunate circumstances.

hoot!: minah likes hoot, a lot. there is something very classy about the retro vibe of the song, even if she thinks there isn’t much classy about the shorts they’re wearing. hoot, if anything, makes her realize that maybe, she’s not too terrible at the whole alluring thing, it’s not all about flashing her body or being sexy, it’s about the way she carries herself. this era, minah might not grow much as a vocalist, but she does as a performer.

bang!: not going to lie, bang intimidates minah a little bit (read: a lot). minah would argue that it’s lipsticks first perfomance-oriented title track and she’s a little intimidated by it. bang! is a good song, minah wouldn’t argue that, but it’s definitely the type of song where some of the other members shine more than her and that’s more than okay with her. she does kill that high note in the bridge though.

first love: when bc told them they were going to be pole dancing, minah felt like she could cry to be honest. but by some stroke of luck (or bc’s choreographers having as little faith in her as she did in herself) minah is actually exempt of any and all pole dancing. she’s just there to look pretty and sing, yes queen give us nothing. she doesn’t hate this era but she doesn’t really love it either, it’s just very neutral for her.

mr. mr.: honestly, mr. mr. could have been one of minah’s top lipstick songs. but it’s not. there are a lot of things that minah likes about this comeback, the styling and choreography are some of her faves they ever had and she likes the song too, apart from one thing. the heavy electronics in the background are just not for minah and it’s always been a huge deal-breaker for her, leaving mr. mr. somewhere in the mid-tier rather than somewhere in the top of the list.

tell me your wish (genie): there is one thing minah and the general public can agree on, genie is one of the best things lipstick has ever done. if not the best. minah loves everything about genie from the song to the styling and so on. it was also their launch to the top of the industry leaving minah with a lot of good memories of this era. also, minah’s iconic ‘dj, put it back on’ launching lipstick into stardom? i think iconic.

dolls: another all-time favorite of minah. dolls is an upbeat, swing-y song that never fails to put minah in a good mood. it was not the hit genie was but it hasn’t made her love the song any less. another thing minah likes about dolls is the choreography. generally speaking, that’s not minah cares about, as long as it’s simple it’s good with her. but for the point dance for dolls, she has a soft spot, it’s just so fun to watch and do.

the boys: the boys is another iconic songs, a clear milestone in their careers and yet again, minah can definitely see why, it’s an incredible song. the only reason it’s not among the very top of her favorite lipstick songs is because -much like bang!- it’s definitely not her strongest era. she has fun doing it, that’s not it, but there are a lot of the members that pull off the song better than her and she has the utmost respect for that.

mr. taxi: yeah no, minah really did try to give this one the benefit of the doubt but mr taxi really just is another miss. the song is little special, not the worst but far from good either, a very forgettable type of mediocre. oh well, it’s only a repackage anyway, it’s not like anyone has high hopes for it. the sexy taxi driver concept is also one of the absolute least favorite things bc has put them in through the years.

party: this… what was this exactly? party is a weird move for lipstick. it’s cuter than their usual sound for some reason and minah isn’t sure why exactly and she doesn’t care to find out either. party is generic, boring and pretty annoying in all honesty. minah cares absolutely nothing for it and if they never have to revisit the song again, her life will be better for it.

lionheart: the better single on the album. with a nostalgic sound and classy 20′s concept to go with it, lionheart rapidly becomes one of minah’s all time favorite lipstick title tracks. lionheart truly redeems the mess that was party.the song is sweet, it’s elegant, and it’s perfect for minah, what more could she ask for?

holiday: remember when minah called party childish? well holiday multiplies that in tenfold. the styling, the song in itself, everything about it. what is it with bc and giving their full albums one good single and one terrible one? in late 2017, minah can’t help but feel like she’s getting too old for stuff like this. also, what the hell are those tule skirts? who allowed that?

all night: the better single on holiday night, anyone with taste would say so, minah included. it’s not one of her all-time faves, but she does appreciate it for what it is. also, she’s a sucker for that disco beat it has to it.

catch me if you can: noise, just like mr mr had been, a harsh electronic undertone that minah just can’t ever grow accustomed to. the prechorus and bridge are nice, she’ll give the song that, the only parts of it that lend for some decent vocal work too, but the rest of it is pure and utter garbage. on top of that, she’s no fan of the choreo either, she’s not a dancer okay. a disappointing comeback, especially as their first without goeun.

gun: those vocals. oh damn. those vocals. gun era didn’t come to play, and minah is here for it. she takes on a large part of the vocals, this time actually interesting ones and never before has she been as determined to prove she is in fact worthy of lipstick’s unofficial new main vocal title. it’s rather on the sexy side, but by now, minah has gained experience, she hasn’t been promoting all these years for nothing.

lil’ touch: minah isn’t gonna lie, the choreo for this one is tough (or well, by her standards at least, which aren’t that high) but it’s so, so worth it. maybe it’s the years of experience, but finally, minah accepts that she can’t keep complaining about dancing, it’s part of the job after all. most of all, lil’ touch assures her lipstick will be just fine.

glue: after all the dust settles, it’s almost like bc remembers what they had in mind when they debuted. sexy, alluring and loads of pleather, the true essence of lipstick, or that’s what it feels like at least. glue is a song that they could have released around their debut era with a non-existing budget to match it. she’s not a huge fan of it, but well, what can she do other than hope their next comebacks will be better. it could be worse though, lipstick has definitely done worse.

wild: honestly, on paper, minah should hate this song more than she does. she’s always been the least favorable towards their sexier concepts mainly because minah doubts she’s much of sexy presence but wild, it works somehow. sure, the mv is a bit much with its cleavage shots and seductive camera staring but the song is actually a lot of fun, very high energy and it makes it nice to perform.

the best of the best...: genie, dolls, lionheart, gun

...and the worst of the worst: mr taxi, party, holiday, catch me if you can

#*:･ﾟ♔– «taste of a cherry pop» // headcanons.#//okay so to avoid any confusions i italicized all the parts i copied from the old headcanon #//and left the new ones + the ones i rewrote for context reasons untouched #//i couldve just done the new songs but i wanted them all in one place #//plus like i said some of the other songs descriptions have moved around a little #//anyway ive said this 50 times in the past 2 days but the way genie is minahs song

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osamuniichann · 5 years

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Map of the Soul: 7

After a ~315 day drought without new music and a comeback from the legends, we are finally back with MOTS: 7! It been a hot minute since ive done a album review (solely for myself LMAO) so lets get back into it bc this album is a home run

Interlude: Shadow. Here we have the extended version of the interlude. can i just say that the lyrics to this masterpiece are so real and true. its not suga speaking nor is it agust d, this is min yoongi speaking of his internal conflict with the celebrity life, which is heartbreaking. on another note, the visuals of the mv are stunning and the ending--dont u just wanna go apeshit??? truly a great addition to the album!

Black Swan. sister black swan has been with us for a month-ish now? it still bumps. HARD. i blasted this to and from my drive to work to the point where i was scared if id get sick of the song but that didnt happen. the way how its hard to pinpoint when and where a member would sing/rap because they INTENTIONALLY wanted the voices to blend as if they were one body. this is the group’s narrative on how no matter how passionate one is on a certain craft, when they lose that drive, its like a death. and it is up to themselves to spark that love and interest once again. a very relatable story across various media, talents, skills, etc.

Filter. When I first heard that this was a jimin solo showcasing the many sides of Jimin, i thought that it was going to be a sad ballad to kind of follow the theme mots: 7 seemed to give off; thought that it would talk about how he has to force personas onto himself to appeal to the masses, but it is the complete opposite. Jimin is all the faces he puts on, he can be cute, sweet, and caring Jimin but he is also a sexy, flirty young man that can attract any living being. how he switches from falsettos to a lower register voice is beyond me, what a versatile one he is! <3

My Time. Moving onto jungkook’s solo, I knew the lyrics were going to be sad especially when it seems to compare himself to others his age. How he speaks about how fast time runs for him, how his childhood and current life is not of the average 22 year old (LIKE UM HERE I AM, SAME AGE AS JUNGKOOK AND IM NORMAL AF while he’s out here breaking records?? WOW). but the life of jungoo can be a bit overwhelming, completely understandable. I just want our boi JK to know that he can be himself and live freely despite such different circumstances. On another note, the groove of this track is so GOOD. it reminds me of Ari and ugh i LIVE for this jam

Louder Than Bombs. When the track started, I could totally tell Troye Sivan helped produce it, it has such a unique sound that only Troye would use. It sounds like this song would totally be on a movie soundtrack IDK WHY. like, i can picture it during an apocalypse movie sldkjg im not completely sure what the meaning is to the song (bc im big stupid) but i feel like its a track saying that no matter the struggles, they will continue to sing confidently, strongly, and wholly to us endlessly. beautiful, just beautiful.

ON. Moving on to the title track of MOTS: 7! I’m very picky about strong anthem-type songs but ON is actually p addicting HAHA There’s a background sound that repeats in the back that sounds like Sans from Undertale, aint that wild LMAO but anyways, the Manifesto Film was crazy good. The drums, the band, the breakdown of it all? UNBELIEVABLE. Also, JK’s vocals during the bridge? H O W. That breakdown tho...oof, that was amazing. They still dance with the thirst that rookie bts would and i think thats why ppl are so drawn to them no matter how many years pass. Fun fact: the choreographer of ON as well as Dionysus actually is from my city in Hawaii and we went to the same high school THATS WILD. the talent she holds!

UGH! Rap line ATE this shit, are we KIDDING. An ode to all the hate comments that we receive, u can see how fed up they are. They made POINTS and we all agree, its the damn law. The way how they opened up with a gunshot, we knew it was coming. Everyone joked about how we bout to hear some gunshots on this album, well they threw ALL of it on this track. Can i just say that Hobi’s verse tho? it hits different, it really do. When they went “ahem, ahem. ahem, ahem-ahem, YOUR AHEM. AHEM-AHEM--” OOOOOUGH i felt that shit!! god, imagine this in concert...the building aint ready!

0:00 (Zero O’ clock). Now we have the vocal line track, we knew they were bout to present some vocals. Great sound, slow and reflecting. Not the first track I’d listen to but it is a great listen. The lyrics tho get to me. The way how they comfort us and say that life can be rough but you can be happy. no matter what happens, with the turning of the clock to 0:00, its a brand new day and we can make the day better. what a powerful message that all of us need to hear once in a while. we will be happy guys, we deserve to be.

Inner Child. Tae’s solo which is a message to his young self. I expected a slow ballad filled with his warm vocals reminiscent of Winter Bear, 4 o’ clock, and Scenery but boi was I wrong. He has this sunset glow voice that wraps u so warmly and the sound is just so happy, pure, and innocent. Its a hopeful message to his younger self on how we will change and be the amazing person we want to or will be. I was sobbing at this song, I tell u. It was 2:00 am in the morning and I was sobbing into my pillow. Imagine comforting your past self that everything will be okay and to take ur hand, it will be all worth it in the end. When he sang “ur my boy, my boy, my boy, my boy!” Ugh...the tears!

Friends. When I heard this was a vmin duet expressing their friendship with each other, I knew it was going to be so emotional! I didn’t expect such a fun, poppy sound tho. They truly are soulmates, the love they have for each other is so wholesome and real, it truly exhibits the love I have for my friends--they’ve been with me through thick and thin, during happy and sad times; the amounts of serotonin they give me is just HHHH. The way how Tae and Jimin have been friends since high school until now is just ugh...we love it. Towards the end when they started singing “you are my soulmate!” towards each other, i started sobbing so hard because WOW. the shivers i felt, this song made me so happy and full!

Moon. Next we have Jin’s solo which is an ode to us army’s. And on another perspective, this is a song from the moon (jin) to the Earth (army)--i have tears in my eyes. The lyrics especially got me in a chokehold and made me sob, the way how he says that he will always be by our side no matter what, the same way how we are there for him...god. The chorus really gets to me, it feels so happy and thankful and I just want to tell Jin that I will forever follow him and the boys. They’ve been with me for years now and I will continue to support, love, and listen to them. Ily to the moon and back, our moon.

Respect. I didn’t expect a Namgi duet but HERE WE ARE. Goddd when i heard that i was SO EXCITE. They’ve known each other for +10 years now and they never miss the chance to tell everyone that they’ve been friends for that long. Not @ how they disliked each other at first but grew to be so mf close, to the point where their family. Ughhh, im so uwu rn. Im so happy, so so happy that Nams started it with AYO SUGA; i SCREAMED. Also, i heard that they recorded it in one take and i could see how much fun they had--especially considering that their rap styles are completely different. Even tho in the song they joke about not knowing what the word Respect means, we know...we just KNOW the high amounts of respect they have for each other. As they mentioned before, Yoon’s respects towards Nams’ leadership and care towards everyone and Nams’ respect towards Yoon’s love and passion for music and producing. Peak comedy is Yoongs overloading on autotune during his parts to the point where its intentional. Bless Namgi.

We are Bulletproof: The Eternal. I felt like a CLOWN when this track started. Like everyone, i thought we were going to have a third installment similar to that of the strong, hip-hop, gunshot-filled part 1 and 2 of we are bulletproof, but we were met with soft vocals and rap. The lyrics tho get to me. This truly was a song about their entire journey and i felt like I experienced all years with them. They’ve been through so much and the way how they sang “we are we are together/forever bulletproof!” They are proud of where they came from and it has stuck with them till now. They are such real people...i cry. ALSO the “We were only seven, but we have you all now.” Whenever i see pictures of their debut fanmeets/concerts vs now its just crazy. imagine singing as an entire being during concerts when they start “OOOOH OH OHH” im so immensely proud of the feats they’ve reached and im excited on what they do next! <3

Outro: Ego. The way how he started it with the fitness gram pacer test just like in previous albums, ugh what a throwback! this song is such a Hobi track, its fun, dance-inducing and its just so FEEL GOOD. the way how he switches flows and is capable of doing so is *chef’s kiss* the way how he speaks about the path he takes is difficult but he doesnt regret it...SOBS also the mv??? UGH SO CUTE. the flashbacks too;; i cry

ON (feat. Sia). With this track, there’s not much extra I can say, all my opinions still stand with the original track wit ot7. I jokingly told my friend that if Sia is gonna be on the track “hey nanana’ing” the same why Halsey was only “oh my my my’ing” i will ctfu. and...welp, that was what happened. I do love Sia tho so props to her!

Overall: I initially thought that MOTS: 7 was going to be a dark, ballad-filled album but it was anything but. It had so much fun songs, the lyrics are again, so deep and meaningful--it pulls at your heartstrings. It felt so raw, personal, emotional, and i love it in all its being. The boys will continue to amaze me no matter what they put out and i forever and endlessly will support and love them the same way they do for us. MOTS: 7 is a masterpiece and im in love

#trish speaks #map of the soul #7 #seven #mots #mots 7 #map of the soul 7 #bts #i do this as a tradition at this point from...maybe WINGS album #so idc if its just me rambling and being mf cringey i just needed a place to rant about good music and cool ppl lol #yall can ignore this dis just a thing for me to let out my emotions lmao #anyway imma go back to drawing haikyuu pretty setters

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okaybutlikeimagine · 5 years

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3 with mike??

3. a song tied to a specific moment in your life

{TW: mentions of survivor’s guilt}

hello there! okay so i feel like the initial thought here is to do something w/ mileven bc.... canon. we all know canon.

but THEN i was like: I 100% agree w/ the people who say that Mike and Will have 1. been in each other’s lives for so long 2. are so dedicated to each other 3. care about each other so much that it’s NEARLY insane that I was like, maybe I should do Byeler.

BUT THEN i was thinking about how deprived we are of Nancy and Mike being siblings.

bc I have a real damn bad relationship w/ my sister. We just don’t get along by any means of the word, we are in no way, shape, or form compatible, and it’s so hard to exist around her w/o wanting to just.... scratch my eyes out. but I WANT to have a good sibling relationship and it makes me upset that the only really good, supportive sibling relationship we see is Will and Jonathan (which is why i adore writing Billy and Max) so I’m going to fix that because!!!! shared trauma, my guys!!!!

Mike and Nancy have shared trauma!! everyone does, everyone went through some goddamn bullshit at very young ages, esp in the first season, but i just need everyone to think about the parallels here. and I’m sure people have pointed them out, but both Mike and Nancy thought they lost their close childhood friends. (?? not 100% sure how long Nancy knew Barb for but it’s a damn small town so probably a very long time) Except, Mike got his friend back and Nancy had to watch, fully knowing that she would never get that same reunion. That she would never get to see Barb’s mother and father hug her tight like that again. That she would never be able to smile and laugh and share jokes w/ her friend again and not because of anything normal but bc their town is FUCKED and some goddamn supernatural thing that’s barely fucking tangible to her has taken Barb away. That she fucking died cold and alone and afraid and feeling so unwanted. Imagine the survivor’s guilt Nancy was feeling immediately after??

and I know the whole “Justice for Barb” thing got a little out of control and I’d agree that it did as well, they definitely could have done it better than just cutting Nancy and Jonathan off from the group bc Memes, but I think that portraying some kind of survivor’s guilt was important.

and I just... think that Mike would see this pain. Mike is The most emotional boy of the group. He’s emotional and slightly dramatic and just doesn’t shy away from his feelings so I 100% think that Mike would see Nancy’s pain.

so ANYWAY i want us all to think about Nancy listening to a mixtape Jonathan made for her after this whole thing went down. and on it is the song Sorry Seems To Be The Hardest Word - Elton John. (and we can talk about other reasons why Jonathan would put this song on the mixtape, SURE, but y’know when you listen to a sad song and specifically pick out the lines that pertain to what you’re sad about right now?? that’s what Nancy is doing.)

and it’s playing pretty loudly and Mike can hear it from down the hallway as he’s headed to his room. And he kind of tip toes his way over to Nancy’s room and hears her sobs. He’s a little surprised that he can hear it over the music but he hears them. They sound deep and consuming and miserable. He knocks lightly, hears a hiccup, and opens the door slowly to see-

His sister. Nancy. Curled up sitting on her bed, knees pulled into her chest and chin laying on her arm. Her eyes, red and puffy and shiny, turn to Mike, before she rubs her face on her arm to get rid of all of the wetness gathered at her cheeks.

And Mike walks slow, real slow, bc he’s never seen Nancy this upset before, this absolutely broken before, and it’s putting too much pressure in his chest. It feels awful. He can see the stress and sadness in her eyebrows as she sits there and looks away from him like she’s embarrassed. But she shouldn’t be. He knows she shouldn’t be.

Because Mike isn’t stupid. He can see it’s been hard.

and yes, he was a little blinded for a bit about the fact that he got his friend back, his absolute best friend back, a little blinded about the fact that he still lost this amazing new girl that he grew so much love and care for, and couldn’t exactly see the situation of everything else. Couldn’t see the people around him, even if they were only a few doors down from his room. Couldn’t see Nancy never changing out of her pajamas, not going to school for a good week, wearing the same sweater every day because it was the one she wore when she went out with Barb for the last time and if she wore it maybe Barb would come back. Couldn’t see that same sweater in their trash can a few weeks later because Nancy couldn’t bear to wear it anymore knowing that Barb was never going to come back.

He became a little deaf too. A little deaf to the cries of Nancy after school. A little deaf to the way she’d yell at their mom when she got a little too overwhelmed. A little deaf to the things she listened to.

but it became clear. The fog lifted and it became abundantly clear to Mike that this was Nancy mourning. Grieving. Wailing in the night in the quietest way possible. Bc while some people probably would want to wail, Nancy hid. She hid and she curled up and she cried. Ever the tough one. Ever the girl with the shield shaped like her school binder.

But now here she is and the memory will forever be burned in Mike’s mind bc there’s Nancy absolutely torn. Unraveled and tumbling towards nothing with no one but her thoughts. And Mike can feel the sadness in the room as he crawls up into her bed with her and sits next to her. Lets Elton John sing ~What do I do when lightning strikes me? And I wake to find that you’re not there.~

And Nancy sobs a little more and Mike watches his sister and feels it all inside of him. Because he felt this too. he felt that all consuming horror in his chest when Will was missing. When Will’s body was found. When El said there was a sign. When everything was happening and every day it got harder to believe any chance of hope but he felt more desperate to try and believe it. But he got the happy ending. Mike got the best possible scenario and it’s hard to be blind of that anymore. He’s not blind to it anymore bc he’s living with someone who got the opposite.

And Mike lays his head on Nancy’s shoulder, trying to give any kind of support because the song is right... ~What do I say when it’s all over? And sorry seems to be the hardest word~

Because Mike does feel sorry. Some part of him feels sorry that Will was alive and Barb wasn’t. That they both couldn’t be alive. That he’s here able to keep living with his best friend while Nancy has to watch Will come over and know Barb will never again walk through those doors and accept one of Mrs. Wheeler’s cookies with a polite smile on her face.

But he also feels like he shouldn’t say it. He’s not really sorry that Will is alive. He doesn’t know what he’s feeling. He’s just... so distraught over seeing his sister this way. And he knows the situation is sad and absurd and... insane. Something that no one at their ages should ever have to face but that doesn’t take the pain away so Mike just sits there, laying his head on Nancy’s shoulder and feeling her own head and face turns towards the top of his head, sobbing into it. And they sit there, and Nancy plays the song over and over and Mike lets her. Mike sits and listens and feels himself start to cry with her because this whole thing has been so fucked up and they need each other. And they’re both so happy to have each other.

#and we need more of the wheeler siblings!!!!#mike wheeler #nancy wheeler #stranger things #ask #anonymous #music #i dunno #i think it's important to portray them bc we just don't and we should!!!#we 100% should!!!!!!!!#i dunno if some people do #maybe i'm not looking hard enough #but the wheeler siblings would so be there for each other #jonathan and will can't have the only healthy sibling relationship in the show c'mon now #angst

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staliasjeronica · 6 years

Text

Riverdale 3.16 Thoughts *Spoilers*

- TBH Hermione does have a point. After what happened to Midge in Carrie… you go for this musical? But whatever Cheryl wanted it and she’s going to get it because THAT’S MY FUCKING BABY OKAY

- THE OPENING IS KEVIN AND A SOLO THIS IS ALL I EVER NEEDED! Also why does his voice/this remind me of Winn from Supergirl???

- Why does the girl in the background look just like Midge??? That’s—

- What the fuck is that choreography tho sksksksks

- MY GIRL VERONICA ❤️❤️❤️ She’s so sad about her and Reggie breaking up catch me CRYING

- ARCHOSIE AWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWW BITCHHHHHHH

- I hate to admit that that tiny bughead peck was kinda c*te

- “Why did I hit him?” bitch… who? Also Reggie wondering why he’s a creep I’m—what? he’s changed wtf I don’t see how he’s a creep/why he was a douchebag but alright

- SWANGS ❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️ ALSO I PAUSED AND ARCHIE LOOKS LIKE FRED IM CRYING

- “Are all of you this miserable?” well… yeah… they can never be kids because your bitch ass husband’s plot is being dragged on that it’s boring now so like… yeah… and now they’re being manipulated by a stupid ass tree so ummm

- “She was a real mess after her breakup with Toni” no 😭😭 but love that they literally broke them up just to base the musical around it like… seriously? lol alright at least I know they get back together because they’re the top and only few healthiest couples on the show so

- TONI AND THE POISONS.

- First off… Reggie shoving Fangs and calling him a geek…? Okay… BUT HIM SHOVING SWEET PEA INTO CHERYL BITCH!!!! Cher calling my boy a pervert I’m sad I want them to be boss ass bitch friends like that’s all I need!!

- OMG JORDAN’S VOICE “WHAT DID I EVER DO TO THEM?” literally just choke me bye

- Betty I get that you automatically hate his choice for making Evelyn co-director but uhhhh he directed the last one with Fangs so your sentence is plain wrong lol

- Poor baby Fangs, the trauma of Midge he never got to really address because last time he was accused of her murder and then almost killed himself so like he never had time to mourn I’m—lmao did Kevin just say no to that or like was he being like “no bitch we’re going to talk about Midge fuck your trauma”

- SP’s pettiness love it. “STRAIGHT” reggie neither you or Archie are straight but cool

- LET CHERYL SAY FUCK 2K19

- This is why they were all lying down? That’s… weird but okay. ALSO I hate agreeing with Betty that this entire thing was to recruit people into the farm :( it’s weird because mostly what Betty does is annoying but this season she’s been mostly okay.

- MY CHONI HEART JUST GOT SHOT

- BITCH SKSKSKS “ARE WE GONNA HAVE A PROBLEM?”

- SKSKSK WHAT WAS THE REASON FOR THAT HAIR WHIP SOUND EFFECT

- “SHUT UP TONI” MY—CHERYL JUST PUSHED HER NO

- Evelyn… leave SP’s solo alone :( he deserves this. HE’S LITERALLY A LEAD TOO

- Betty, one of the main’s in the play, is telling Evelyn this musical is for recruitment. Then why tf are you in it Betty

- FP being dismissive of Jughead and how much he cares about the trailer? Smells fishy…

- Poor Veronica. like yeah her dad is a cunt but like it’s her parents… my poor baby

- So what if he knows? He’s doing illegal shit, it doesn’t fucking matter??? He’s such a whiny pissbaby

- SP BEING ALL CUTE AND SHIT. LMAO “YOU NEED A JELLO-O SHOT” SKSKS WE NEED MORE CUTE HAPPY SP PLEASE AND THANKS

- Veggie… is hot… I love them and want them back together :(

- oH NO SP SAW ARCHOSIE MY BOY IS SO SAD

- TONI AND THE POISONS YESSSSS

- whO THE FUCK IS SITTING IN THE TUB ALICE WAS ALMOST DROWNED IN

- VEGGIE. VERONICA LOOKS SO GOOD UGH I LOVE THEM. Stop with the “Endgame” not only because ew but because she’s said that to Archie and that may be… triggering.

- Did Evelyn just give Kevin a spiked brownie…

- Evelyn you sneaky bitch… I know this is what brings Kangs together but I didn’t want it like this!!!

- FANGS… wow an actual line that provides insight into his life? Mmhm

- That almost smile Fangs gave… was cute… but I’m not here for this recruitment.

- SP IS A PETTY BITCH SKSKSKS like that’s bad but like… shit I can’t wait for SP to rage and save his best friend from a stupid ass cult

- “That is what we in the theater call a breakthrough” um I assume you’ve never been in theater but also I don’t think that’s correct…

- ALSO ALL THIS BERONICA IS SO SWEET I MISS THEM. Still, though, Betty needs to apologize for all of the shit she’s done and said to Veronica

- “He’s a real class act, that Sweet Pea…” girl he has every right to be upset though. I mean he shouldn’t have outed your relationship. Also, the definition of “class act” is a person or thing displaying impressive and stylish excellence so like is that supposed to be an insult…?

- Reggie is so good ughhhhh 😻😻

- Evelyn go away you shady bitch. Also what’s the point of getting mad at Toni for wearing red? lol

- DEAD GIRL WALKING BITCHH I LOVE THIS. OH MY GOD PEACHES? THIS IS THE SCENE? SHE JUST CAME ONTO PEACHES. NOW SWEET PEA. THIS IS THE SCENE. Also Jordan’s voice… choke me! ALSO I love how he’s down with it though? Like I’m guessing this isn’t him and Toni’s first thing… but why are they doing this threesome on the stage lmaooooo

- SKSKKSKS PEACHES AND PEA (MMHM why does that sound nice… she beat him up nooo) LOOK AT EACH OTHER LIKE “THIS BITCH MADE US UNDRESS AND THEN LEAVES” like thank GOD because Choni but still

- NO ONE CAN TELL ME DIFFERENTLY, SP LIKES TO BE BOSSED AROUND. HE’S A SUBMISSIVE. The way Toni pointed and he just followed? He loves being bossed around bye my story Unholy is correct thank you and goodbye

- GOTTA ADMIT THE “can I borrow your camera?” WAS CUTE OKAY

- OH THIS IS WHERE KANGS GETS LIKE MARRIED LMAO I’ve wanted Kangs (less than Swangs yeah but whatever) BUT NOT LIKE THIS. ALSO DREW’S VOICE FUCK MEEEEE. the kiss 😭❤️ aLSO WOULDN’T IT BE EASIER TO TAKE A VIDEO BETTY LOL

- Archie practicing his moves looks so weird when it’s not on a punching bag or anything like—

- Archosie uwu THIS DUET FUCK ME UPPPPP THIS IS SO CUTE. JOSIE’S ABS FUCKKKK

- Did Betty seriously think that her taking that picture would work??? Should’ve taken a video but mmhm

- How did Toni get in. I feel like Cheryl would have immediately taken her key. BUT ALSO THE HEATHER’S REFERENCE. AND CHONI. UGH CHERYL’S ABOUT TO CRY STOP STOP STOP!!! Literally this scene proves that Choni is the HEALTHIEST couple on this show like they ACTUALLY took time to talk through their shit (kinda, not the full thing but the start of it at least)

- Did… Jughead just call the Ghoulies/Serpents tonsils??????????

- “… the longing for what they’ve lost” *Swosie looks at one another KNOWING this bitch did this on purpose* COLE SINGING OMFG this really irks me that Bughead has actually been kinda cute on this episode? CHONI BITCH YES. NEVERMIND BUGHEAD GO AWAY I JUST WANT MY TWO QUEENS

- Also if this doesn’t include Swosie… why were they given the sheets and shit from Kevin and whatnot? This is evil. But this proves that Bughead COULD be cute and healthy if they weren’t these annoying little shit heads that they are now like let them be kids and normal and not shitty people… it’s not that hard.

- Betty… I was about to say that you telling him to not let his emotions get the best of him was actually a good idea but then you suggested burning down his fucking trailer. I get it, you’re a Blossom, but chill the fuck out. You ALMOST had a good idea and weren’t being stupid… but now you ruined it.

- Boo fucking hoo your wife tried to kill you Hiram

- So now that even Hiram says that there’s no family anymore… can he let her and Archie (bc come on that all can’t go away with some words and a handshake/mutual agreement) the fuck go? ALSO POOR VERONICA

- OH THIS IS THE SONG EVERYONE WAS PRAISING LAST NIGHT. CAMI IS SUCH A GREAT ACTOR WE LOVE AND STAN A QUEEN!!!

- First of all… SP saying hi to Evelyn… not sure how I feel about that. SECOND OF ALL FANGS IS THE CUTEST BYE

- THE BLOT THING IS SO CUTEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE

- Bughead really get off to violence and shit huh… that’s… weird. But sure.

- why is Betty wearing the crown sweater it looks so weird idk why and Jughead looks so out of place lol

- SWEET PEA GETTING INTO IT IN THE BACK SHITTTTTTT

- Oh this cult clap is creepy… why… that’s so weird stop. Also it’s not like other people to not join in on the clapping but alright

#Riverdale #Riverdale Heathers #Riverdale 3.16 #Veronica Lodge #Jughead Jones #Archie Andrews #Betty Cooper #Sweet Pea #Fangs Fogarty #Cheryl Blossom #Toni Topaz #Kevin Keller #Evelyn Evernever #Swangs #Jeronica #Vughead #Barchie #Kangs

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