#she deserves to go apeshit

[moch1rice]

I need her to start killing actually she deserves it

[anachronistic-falsehood]

i haven’t been able to watch the vods or streams lately but i’m going to watch bagi’s vod from yesterday bc i KNOW what happened and i am DEVASTATED about it

[dilford]

IF hakari dies i nominate miwa to take up the mantle of jjk's Battle Crazed Melee Fighter that originated with todo

[fastcardotmp3]

actually I think in season 5 there should be a scene where Nancy is in trouble and without a gun, either out of bullets or the whole damn thing is out of reach and she gets just enough time to grab a swingable object nearby before she has to, in fact, start swinging.

I think she should get to wail on the monster that killed her best friend and dragged her teenage years into a war. I think she should get covered in blood from head to toe, screaming so hard and loud and visceral her throat goes hoarse and cracking with a sob.

I think she should keep hitting hitting hitting hitting long after the thing is dead on the ground, splattering blood and viscera and shards of broken fangs.

I thinks she should cry. I think she should get that release. I think she should all but take down a demogorgon with her bare hands because it's been years and because she's stronger now and because you turned a teenage girl into a soldier, what did you expect to happen?

I think Nancy Wheeler should get heaving, weeping, violent catharsis and I think at the end of it all? When she finally accepts the mangled body in front of her can't hurt her friends anymore?

I think she deserves to be comforted.

[supermellon64]

Molly bear paw concepts!

[thefirstknife]

The thing about the final lore tab is that, besides the fact that I'm devastated in ways I can't put into words, the way Saint was affected by this whole thing is unique.

This is obviously primarily Osiris' trauma that we can't really properly comprehend, but Osiris wasn't fully conscious for most of it. It fell to Saint to wait, and hope, that Osiris would be brought back and that he would wake up. There was no certainty for him there. And even before that, he watched "Osiris" being strange and distant and acting weird but obviously nobody could even begin to speculate that the person he interacted with wasn't Osiris at all, so the trauma went from there, from learning that he lost Sagira, then to the shock of Osiris being kidnapped and then the quest to bring him back and then him being brought back in a coma and then the 9 long months of waiting until he woke up.

The state of constant anxiety he experienced for almost 2 years total is nervewracking and gutwrenching. I don't think we can fully understand the impact of that on someone. And the best, or worst, thing is that Saint is infinitely patient. He is infinitely emotional and merciful and opts to be the better person and to wait and wait and wait. And hope that it can be fixed.

Except it can't. It can't be fixed. And not only can it not be fixed, but there will never be justice for it. It's impossible. There isn't a way to truly punish Savathun for what she's done. There is no relief or catharsis for Saint. While Osiris can mostly move on, Osiris did not really have to go through what Saint had to go through. Their traumas are different and Saint's is the type that no one can really understand and there is nothing he can do about it.

A younger Saint would've killed Immaru and then Savathun, 100%. But now he can't, because he isn't that person anymore. And yet, the grief and trauma remain and he has no outlet for them and nothing that can be done to enact any sort of justice. So he settles for pure rage, letting himself essentially vent that anger out, but still leave everyone alive. And there's really no true release here. He got a brief satisfaction of killing Savathun over and over, but at the end of the day, she will walk away and nothing will change and there will be no fix.

Which is why he comes back and just cries. As he said, this wasn't for Osiris, it was for him. It was his outlet for anger and nothing else. After that, there's nothing else left to do but cry. No one can really help him carry the burden of what he's gone through and besides: he's a Titan. He's the one carrying other people's burdens. Which just added to the trauma because for so long he's only cared for others, mostly for Osiris, and never really let himself fully grieve or talk about it. Saint never really processed the horrifying ordeal of constant concern for his loved one, then the realisation that his loved one isn't even with him, then the desperate search and then waiting for months and months for the hope that his loved one might wake up. Then Osiris is awake and we're forced to play allies with the person who traumatised both of them in an incomprehensibly terrifying way. Saint had no other way of attempting to make his peace with the situation.

Year of processing grief. I'm in shambles.

[insignificant457]

It’s so funny to me that victra has like…a normal job. Everyone else is either military or military adjacent, but she’s literally just the ceo of a huge shipping company, she’s not even in politics. Like sure, she’s former military, but she hasn’t been doing that in years until the war comes back to mars. Like imagine turning on the tv and you see footage of Jeff bezos beheading an enemy general. That’s what the citizens of mars were experiencing during the battle of Phobos.

[ithinkdogshouldvote2]

So not sorry when i say that I’m a tracker hater and a Nara fan.

[avelera]

Man, I can’t believe there isn’t a SINGLE Dreamling fic that deals with Hob finding out about what a crap girlfriend Thessaly (renowned TERF witch) was to Dream, like literally bad enough she contributed to kicking off his self-destruction road-trip and then said she never really liked him that way in the first place.

REGARDLESS of blame for the relationship souring, which is pretty par for the course for Dream, I can’t help but think that should they ever cross paths, Hob would have WORDS for the witch who broke his friend’s heart, and a pining Hob in particular would just have to look at that whole situation where Dream dated another human immortal and wonder why the fuck Dream courted her in the first place (Hob is right there) but that aside, I could see Hob pushing those feelings deep down so he could be there for his friend after, in a non-self-interested way, and quite possibly avert that entire aspect of the self destruction road trip…mostly because Hob is over here spiraling in completely different ways about how his friend deserves so much better and Hob’s subsequent meltdown about whether it’s breaking the bro code to offer to be that something better

[majosullivan]

At some point down the line, I think Morella should be allowed to stab Monstresor through the back, as a treat :)

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[least-carpet]

Hiiii, if it's not too much, can you describe the biggest differences between the live action characters and the novel characters in MDZS? They are a lot, so I will love even the difference between few of them! I haven't seen the live action and I don't know if I will ever, but I am curious, considering all the meta. Anyway, thank you in general, even if you don't answer!

Hello anon! This has been in the inbox forever because there are soooo many ways to answer this! However, let me be transparent that I've watched maybe like 1/10 of CQL. Among other obstacles, I simply do not care that much about Lan Wangji and he's always there (even though Wang Yibo is giving it his all... it's not his fault I'm a hater...). Chewing through a book with Ms. Mxtx's commentary was just more enjoyable to me, and even then, to be honest, I still liked SVSSS better. (I just love Shen Yuan/Shen Qingqiu so much. That dude is wild.)

Still, the live action definitely affected how I understood certain characters (...primarily Nie Huaisang) and made me interested in relationships that I didn't pay any attention to in the novel. (I freely admit that the nieyao brainrot is 100% CQL's fault.) Also I found Wang Zhuocheng's Jiang Cheng very cute and loveable. It definitely contributed to my Jiang Cheng Brain Disease.

LISTEN. HE HAS BIG SAD EYES AND THE MEANEST SNEER AND HE MIGHT BURST INTO TEARS AT ANY TIME. HE IS A BABY. A baby who could kill you with his terrifying lightning whip! But a baby nonetheless, to me.

So if you want someone with a real and knowledgeable opinion on the live action, I'm probably not the right person for that! However, here's one difference that changed a bunch of stuff about the characters that I found compelling in the novel: the second flautist.

CQL adds Su She as a second flautist doing unorthodox cultivation in a couple of different places, including at Qiongqi Path, where he seizes control of Wen Ning and is therefore responsible for Jin Zixuan's death. Removing the responsibility for Jin Zixuan's death from Wei Wuxian creates a bunch of cascading character and relationship implications that I don't love.

Firstly, all of the people who cautioned Wei Wuxian against his unorthodox cultivation are now... wrong. If he never lost control, then actually his assessment that he could maintain control wasn't overconfidence, it was just true, and he was persecuted because the Jin needed a scapegoat and wanted the Yin Tiger Tally, not because his cultivation path actually involved significant risks and drawbacks. (To be fair, the Jins actively exploited those drawbacks, the public perception of his cultivation, and Wei Wuxian's failure to manage his reputation. But it matters whether the risks exist or are just made up.)

Secondly, removing his responsibility for Jin Zixuan's death transforms both Wei Wuxian's character and how we understand his relationships with Jiang Yanli, Jiang Cheng, and Jin Ling. Because, in the novel, he kills Jin Zixuan under duress but also after a lifetime of conflict with him. Like, he hates the dude, he doesn't think he's worthy of Jiang Yanli, and he's not willing to examine his hatred and resentment even though Jiang Yanli loves Jin Zixuan and wants to marry him, even after she marries him and has a child with him. (I would argue that a lot of the resentment is because of the eventual marriage; by marrying Jiang Yanli, Jin Zixuan becomes legally recognized family to the Jiang siblings, while Wei Wuxian's relationship with them has no social recognition; I think Wei Wuxian is deeply threatened by that but can't articulate it.) It's a huge failure! Like, dude, you loved someone and you killed that person's beloved spouse. That points to a certain degree of repressed jealousy, possessiveness, longing, arrogance, the list goes on... I am so compelled by that conflict, and the adaptation just erases it.

This also affects how we read Jin Ling's relationship with Wei Wuxian. In one scenario, a teenage Jin Ling is (eventually, minus one little stab) ending the cycle of violence by not seeking vengeance for his father's murder. In the other, it was actually someone associated with Jin Ling's paternal family that killed his father, and he's maybe just... coming to terms with that? One of these scenarios is so much richer and more interesting.

How it affects the relationship between Jiang Cheng and Wei Wuxian is a little more subtle. It locates the responsibility for a lot of the harm done to the Jiang siblings with the Jin sect, not with Wei Wuxian, removing some of Wei Wuxian's culpability in the devolution of his relationship with Jiang Cheng. If Wei Wuxian isn't guilty of wronging the Jiang family (and instead is also a victim of the Jin sect), then all of Jiang Cheng's rage and betrayal was misdirected. They were both tricked. In some ways, maybe that's easier to patch up after canon? (I wonder if this is why many CQL yunmeng shuangjie reconciliation fics have Jiang Cheng apologize to Wei Wuxian, but not the other way around?) But it's so much less interesting to me!

Finally, it removes Wei Wuxian's tragic flaw! Dude is legitimately a genius but he's got hubris coming out of his ears and it fucks him up big time! This is classic stuff. Please stop flattening my boy!!

[mugwot]

[skullinacowboyhat]

feral rin makes brain go brrr....

[cyan-lemonade]

Girl help all I can draw now are double life mini comics

[hotdogmchiggin]

King and Eda are fucking pissed.

Both of their reactions throughout this whole scene in Watching and Dreaming fucking destroyed me man. Their complete, wordless shock followed by unbridled grief-stricken rage just…. hit hard. Havent really seen art for this moment so wanted to take a crack at it.

Also since I’ve been experimenting more with procreate, I learned that it automatically saves a TIMELAPSE. So now YOU TOO! Can see my abysmal drawing process. I’ll either add that in a reblog or in a new post, so just keep an eye out if you’re interested in seeing that I guess.

Anyway tumblr’s gonna fuck up the quality so I’m putting CLOSEUPS under the cut.

[andiebomb]

Quick animatic I did cuz y’know ANGST ANGST ANGST