#she's easier to buy for than most people bc i generally know exactly what kind of stuff she likes

[rogersstevie]

sighhh looking at my bookmarks of present ideas for my mom and none of it sounds good rn

[static-fanatic-1]

I just went through you r blong and it's?? So amazing??? Like omg I wass literally screaming when I read all that glorious stuff, you're doing god's work here love💕 but I would like to know what Kikyo, Illumi, Milluki, Kurapika, Pakunoda, Chrollo and Silva + Shigaraki, Overhaul, Monoma, Chronostasis, Setsuno, Tamaki, Endeavor, Shinsou and Aizawa do for winter and/or Christmas/other religious holidays activities with their darling? Bc I'm ready to sell my vital organs for it ;_;

Thanks you <3

Also, Christmas wit da bois is an amazing idea. (I’ll be doing normal Winter stuff and some religious holidays.)

Kikyo/Illumi/Milluki/Silva:

Since they are a family, I will combine them (and to make this large post a bit shorter and easier haha).

Anyway, they celebrate Christmas more for the gifts and to spoil their kids. You better expect a large, family gathering for the entire two weeks of Christmas and New Years. It doesn’t really matter, you will be forced to celebrate Christmas with them. I mean you are part of the family.

Think of it as a resort holiday, you are treated like a queen/king and anything you want will go. Well, other than freedom of course. Still, you receive many gifts that are beyond your price tag, and the gifts you give them are more decorative to be honest. You don’t have as much money to spend as them, so you decided to make all of your gifts because you hoped the thought would be enough. They might not look the best, but each Zoldyck will treasure it to the end of their days.

They will try to incorporate any traditions as long as they are family oriented, they aren’t monsters. And even if you have other holidays you celebrate, you will still celebrate Christmas with them. With that being said, they will be kind enough to celebrate your own holidays, it will be a smaller scaled thing though.

Kurapika:

He finds it to be a bonding moment, and he doesn’t get enough of those for obvious reasons. He will go above and beyond to please you, simply to get back on your good side a bit.

Cocoa, apple cider, blankets, decorations, traditions, ANYTHING is on. He wants you to relax and feel at home around him. Despite his extremely controlling attitude, he wants you to love him. Sadly he prioritizes your absolute safety over your mental health.

But it’s sweet for the most part, he actually seems to act normal, he doesn’t seem as if he is going to snap and try to force you into anything. But yes, he might try to get things to be hot and heavy, you being relaxed is too perfect of an oppertunity to waste. He still has a clan to rebuild.

Pakunoda:

I wrote chrollo’s before Paku’s, so it’s kinda the same. She will be more active in putting things together and getting into the festivities. She will get really close, using the excuse that she’s cold just to cuddle with you.

Christmas sex? Yeah, probably. She’ll take care of everything, you could sit back and watch her do everything. But it’s more fun together right?

Everyone is invited, so expect the rest of the Troupe and their darlings!

Chrollo:

He doesn’t mind, he’s pretty accommodating too! He’s honestly the most okay with anything. I would think the people of Meteor City look forward to Christmas, there isn’t a lot but people who really care for one another take the time to chill with each other.

With you around, they have a really big excuse to go all out! Chrollo will sit back and relax, having you and the rest of the Troupe decorate and get presents. He will help of course if you ask, but he will mostly be on the side lines.

Anything else is a-okay too! He doesn’t care as long as you are happy, and the Troupe can join in the festivities.

Shigiraki:

Christmas is something he does know! But he knows nothing of any other holiday to be honest. All for One gave him a few gifts in his life time, not much but enough for Shigiraki to develope the concept of Christmas. I mean when he was a kid he loved Christmas with his family. It was one of the happiest times back then.

So he genuinely had a love hate relationship with the holiday. You will ah e to take initiative on this one. Giving a gift, starting decorations, making hot coco or something. Anything to get the ball rolling and he would begrudgingly comply.

Secretly, he is excited to join the holiday festivities with you. Specifically with you, anyone else and they would be dust. He is okay with learning new holiday traditions too, like why do you guys light candles for a holiday? Well oh tell him with a smile and help him light one on fire. He almost burns the whole hideout down. You’ll have to watch him.

Endeavor:

He celebrates Christmas, but he’s more of a grinch. He celebrates it with his kids and wife, just because it’s something families do. Though throughout his life he never found it more than a obligation.

When you come along, he’s on the path of becoming a better person, so he will definantly try harder. One Christmas with all the fun stuff with you, and another one for his family. He kinda lets you take the lead, of course if you really want something you will have to do some sexual trades. Can’t let you get too comfortable right?

Moreover, if you are on good terms with his immediate family, you could probably add more cheer to the holiday. Also if you celebrate another holiday then don’t worry, he’ll accommodate to be nicer.

Overhaul:

Who cares about winter, it’s cold and you are more likely to get sick because of it. Your immune system will be more likely to be compromised so you better expect him to helicopter a bit more.

Warm teas, heavy blankets, vitamins, and supplaments are to be expected. Nothing sugary either, maybe a bit of medical honey in your tea but not much.

Christmas isn’t something he celebrates, but he will make a slight exception if you are good. If you act like a suck up, he’ll be nice and maybe get you Christmas gift. Maybe even a small Christmas tree for moral. I wouldn’t expect too much though.

Chronostasis:

He like winter, he doesn’t know why exactly, but he does. I can easily see him getting into the activities of December. Like the ballets and Christmas lights and other festive things that make you leave your house. Headcannon that he might be a decent ice skater too. He simply enjoys the activities more than the actual holidays.

He won’t mind helping decorate or getting gifts or any other holiday traditions. Actually, if they are fun traditions without much competitive fire, he’ll probably want to do them more.

Although I don’t see him liking the warm ness of cuddling and all that, I can see him enjoying the slight chill in the air. Supportive of any holiday you celebrate, might even try to make more traditions too.

Monoma:

He likes Christmas and the holidays, it’s the perfect time to get the best gifts for his little darling. Oddly enough he loves getting small gifts for you, it makes him feel prideful knowing you like what he got you, so he loves Christmas is general.

As for winter, he likes it! It’s an excuse to get you under the covers and warm you up. That can be taken both ways if ya’ know what I’m saying.

I think he would prefer warm drinks like tea and apple cider over hot chocolate, but hell totally make some for you. Any decorations are also game, just expect some teasing for the childish stuffed animal you keep on the fireplace mantle.

Setstuno:

He is kinda clueless in the sense he just doesn’t know where to start. Like he knows about the basics of holiday traditions, but he doesn’t know if you do those traditions. He’ll be pretty laid back when you get excited about it though. This clingy man will simply sit back and watch the entire time.

Winter isn’t his favorite, but he doesn’t mind being able to hold you close so you won’t be cold. He is very possessive considering what happened to his last lover. He will be perfectly fine with helping with easy things, but when it comes to the more taxing things, he’ll let you take the reins.

He’ll try to buy you a present he thinks you’ll like, but he won’t get too fancy. After all he really just wants to hold you close and soak in your warmth.

Tamaki:

Nervous boy feels most comfortable in winter, at least in his home where he has you to cuddle, bake, and hold. He loves the warmth found in a home, and he will encourage any baking you want to do. It just leaves him with a warm feeling inside when he can bake cookies and brownies with you by his side.

Although he’s all hands on deck when the holidays come along, he’s still nervous about it. He’ll ask questions and make sure everything works how it’s supposed to because he doesn’t want to mess something up for you. Might accidentally go a bit overboard with gifts or other traditional activities.

He just wants to please you though, a real sweetheart when it comes down to it.

Shinsou:

I think Shinsou likes winter because it means spring is on its way. I can see him being a spring loving boy because of all the kittens and flowers blooming. Winter is good though, might be his second favorite season. He loves the blankets and the hot cocoa and the baked goods and the holiday cheer. Especially the gift giving, he likes seeing you happy when he gives you a gift.

He probably won’t be too enthusiastic about any holiday stuff, but he will sure support it and help with anything you need. Need a Christiana’s tree because you can’t have a Christmas without it? You better bet he’ll get it right away.

He loves watching you get excited about the holidays, everything in the house just seems a bit more cheerful because of you. He will wrap you in blankets and jackets and hold you closely in his arms. You also better bet anything you do he will be there to help you. He might not be the most into the holidays, but he surely loves getting ready for the holidays with you.

Aizawa:

Winter is not his favorite season, but I’d say it’s probably second place. He doesn’t do too much, as he simply doesn’t want to put in that much effort in something so minuscule. But, he defiantly encourages his Darling if they want to decorate or bake or something wintery.

Christmas also isn’t really a big thing for him, as he doesn’t usually buy presents for other people. Of course, his Darling is another story. Unlike most people, he buys a few presents for you because you are his special kitten.

He will also help decorate or bake small things if you want to. Hot chocolate is a must, he has a special, bitter hot chocolate just for himself that he loves. You have your sweet beverage and he has his bitter one. Just don’t forget the marshmallows.

Warm cuddles is a blessing to him. When it’s cold he grabs blankets and wraps you up like a baby is a swadle just to hold you close to him. As for other holidays, he will respect them and whatever stuff come with them. Like Hanukkah and the candles for each night. Just don’t expect anything too crazy, he just wants a comfortable holiday evening with you.

Happy Holidays sweethearts!!! I hope you have an amazing whatever you celebrate and if you celebrate nothing, than have a wonderful day!

[yesimwriting]

Anastasia (prologue)

A/n ive been talking about my Anastasia x SOC story for awhile and im finally ready to post the prequel,, ive also been working on some requests and thinking about my next multi-part fic (ive made some posts about it lol)

things to know before reading: i tend to like to make up my own countries when writing these type of politically/plot driven fics that revolve around a royal family bc i think it makes it not only easier to write but less confusing bc it takes out the issue of potentially conflicting with canon, so i made up the country ‘Anastasia’ is from,, this also follows the musical Anastasia a little more bc i feel like that version of the story is more mature and easier to write for SOC (the only difference is that not everyone is happy that Anastasia is alive and someone tries to kill her bc they hate the royal family)

Series Summary: y/n makes an unconventional deal with Kaz to save the life of her best friend. No one’s ever made a deal with the infamous Dirtyhands that resulted in them shedding the title of orphan from a revolution-torn country that can’t remember her life before the orphanage and taking on the title of Princess Anastasia. As time progresses, things are made more complicated as y/n has to deal with royals, revolutionaries, a grisha general who has a lot to gain from an alliance with a princess that doesn’t know what she’s doing, and potential feelings for a conflicted Kaz Brekker that has more to do with Anastasia’s disappearance than he’s ever admitted. 

--

The world seems to be made up impossible things. Each day, people defy odds, strangers fall in love, the universe expands, and the Saints watch it all. I am not the kind of person to sneer at a miracle, to try to explain it away instead of acknowledging it for what it is. 

But what this stranger is proposing is laughable. 

I lean more into the chair, doing all I can to get away from the desk that he sits at. A nervous kind of giggle threatens to escape me, a laugh at the expense of the foolishness of the situation. If his demeanor was any less brooding, I would have already laughed at the irony. Kaz Brekker, the Dirtyhands, creating a ploy so colored by the fairytale notions of dreamers.

The longer I go without reacting, the worse this situation becomes. I haven’t seen Verne since Brekker and his people separated us. I can see the world of torment my eldest friend must be experiencing at this very moment while I sit at this desk. 

“Me?” I’m the most ridiculous part of his plan. He said the only reason me and my partner are still alive is because I fit the general description of the kind of person he needs, and if I’m blackmailed into it he won’t need to waste kruge paying me. “A princess?” 

He blinks, as uninterested and stoic as he’s been since he first ordered me into his office. “A pretend one,” his correction feels like a slight, “a surrogate one.” 

My eyebrows furrow together. “But what--I know the odds of the real Anastasia coming back are beyond slim, but if we’re caught in a lie the Dowager Duchess of Avila will have all of us killed. She may be in Ravka now, and her title nothing more than decorative due to the revolution, but she still has people loyal to her.” 

“Anastasia can’t come back.” The graveness of his voice is so certain a part of me has to wonder if he could have anything to do with her death. I dismiss the thought almost immediately, I don’t know his exact age, but he doesn’t look much older than me. He couldn’t have been more than two or three years older than Anastasia when she died, and she was a child at the time. “No one remains missing that long unless they’re dead.” 

I awkwardly scratch the back of my wrist, “You’re the expert here.” No--I did not just say that out loud. “Sorry--I didn’t mean to say that out loud. Not that thinking it makes it any better, but at least then you wouldn’t know and I’d seem like less of an idiot and I wouldn’t be talking about it right now, and just rambling at a really inconvenient time for me to just...” I cringe slightly, opting to stare at his desk instead of meeting his judgmental gaze. “Sorry, again. Normally Verne is here, and he just kicks me in the shin or something to shut me up.” 

“If you’d like to see what apparently is your only source of impulse control alive and in decent enough condition to kick anything ever again, you’ll agree to what I’m proposing.” 

I straighten my posture slightly, nerves and guilt twisting in my stomach. “I’m going to be as transparent as physically possible.” The warning is for both of us, the urge to hide all my weaknesses bubbling in my chest. “Mr. Brekker.” That’s awkward--what am I supposed to call him? “I’m a university student that’s only in Ketterdam because of an academic scholarship. I’m from somewhere average--I’m not from a place nice enough to give me the manners I’d need to pass as a girl who spent her fundamental years growing up in luxury and I’m not from a place grimy enough to make me a quick enough liar to make up for what I don’t know.” I inhale slowly, ignoring the sting of the flaws I laid out for a cruel stranger. “I’m not particularly graceful or sly or talented in any field that someone like you would value. The closest thing I have to talent involves things that can be tracked on paper. I wasn’t even supposed to be here tonight, I was just doing a friend a favor.” 

“You claim that you’re not a decent liar or a thief and yet your closest friend is one who believed himself talented enough to challenge me?” 

I resist the urge to shrink back into my seat. “This is Ketterdam, you try finding someone that doesn’t dabble in crime and ambition.” He does’t reply to my retort, which I think means I won. “Cards on the table, there’s nothing I wouldn’t do to save Verne, but you don’t want me for something like this.” 

He pauses, jaw locked and eyes too stony for me to interpret. “Every flaw you just pointed out, every reason you think makes you unfit for this job, is exactly the reason I’m offering you this.” I keep a thousand questions to myself as I wait for him to continue. “Those used to lying lack the warmth that will be needed to sell this. The Dowager Duchess is a grandmother first when it comes to Anastasia, that’s why she’s offering so much gold. She, and the rest of the royals that desire to know what happened to Anastasia, want to believe the story I’m telling. If you present yourself as someone real and warm and you understand table manners enough to not disturb the serene picture they want, they’ll squint at ugly details until they disappear.” 

Wow. I know that he’s intelligent, but what he’s constructing is so much more bullet proof than I thought it’d be. “I’ll admit you’ve constructed an airtight narrative.” 

I know my approval means nothing to him, but it’s the most agreeable I’m willing to be. “A narrative the background you told me of fits perfectly.” I shouldn’t have answered all those questions he asked me earlier so honestly. “A child born in Avila who was sent to a Kerch orphanage due to a war-relief effort during the revolution. A faceless orphan who was found during the height of the revolution with no memory of anything before the morning she woke up in a hospital cot.” 

I say nothing. My skin burns in protest of someone knowing so much about me. He must take my silence as a sign of me teetering the line away from what he wants, because he then says, “your friend is fortunate, if things aligned a little less perfectly he’d be dead already.” 

Dead already. The words elate my heart in a way that pinches. He’s still alive. Verne is alive. “If I agree, you let me see him and then you let him go.” 

“If you need a contract to believe me, I can have that arranged.” The words have an almost mocking edge. I guess it’d be a little ridiculous to get an official contract drawn up for something so small. “If you at any point change your mind, I’ll do the same.” 

The threat is clear. I back out and Verne pays for it in blood. Verne’s safety is once again in my hand. This situation is much more precarious than Kaz Brekker wants it to seem. “You need me to do something that will literally last the rest of my life. Tiaras aren’t something you can slip in and out of.” 

“Yes, I’m forcing you to give up a life in the slums for a palace for your friend’s life. This must be a difficult choice for you.” 

I look down to avoid rolling my eyes. “It’s still permanent, and it’s large because at any point I could reveal the truth and take you down with me.” 

“Remember who you speak to.” His voice has turned to pure darkness. 

Don’t wince. Don’t wince. Don’t wince. “All I’m saying is that you’ve offered Verne’s life to buy my cooperation, but you have yet to mention the cost of my silence.”

His expression is sharp enough to draw blood. “The Dowager Duchess is old and sick, wait at most two years and you’ll have more gold than you could ever spend. The revolution took that family’s power, not the wealth the Duchess took with her to Ravka the night of the massacre.” 

I shift awkwardly. “I’m not trying to get kruge from you for me.” I fold my hands neatly on my lap to avoid fidgeting. “Verne--he’s beyond desperate for kruge, that’s why he risked angering you.” The urge to shy away threatens to break my resolve. I think of all the times Verne has saved me. “Let him keep what he tried to take.” The request is awkward from my lips. I’m asking for more when I should should be grateful any type of mercy came from him. Any type of offer. “Half. Let him keep half.” 

He’s silent for a long moment, weighing the implications of loss. “You’re already entitled enough to pass for royalty.” I don’t let myself shrink. “Deal, but not because you threatened me--try that again and you’ll find yourself wishing you had never left the orphanage you came from.” The relief is practically crushing. Verne is going to be okay. He’s going to live and my resistance earned him enough kruge to have a week or two without worry as he plans what he’ll do in my absence. “You better be as good a study as you made yourself seem to be.” 

I don’t understand the second threat. “Studying?” 

“You didn’t think you could wander into the Dowager Duchess’s home, use the excuse of amnesia to explain why you don’t even know your own mother’s name, and expect them to think you more than an Avilan orphan with a desire for wealth.” 

“I actually don’t know my own mother’s name because of amnesia.” 

He’s in no mood to be contradicted, glowering sharply, “not anymore, anything that doesn’t fit the narrative I’m constructing is no longer true.” He straightens slightly as he begins to pace away from me. “You’ll have five minutes with your friend and then we’ll see where your table manners are at. I know someone who knows enough to correct you.” 

I try to picture where someone like him would meet someone that knows about etiquette. My mind provides nothing useful, but it doesn’t matter--I’ve agreed. It can’t be undone, not without having the blood of my dearest friend on my hands. 

[mermaidsirennikita]

Glad I'm not the only one getting odd vibes from the production. I mean idk a lot about tv shows but isn't the showrunner the one in charge? So him saying that he fought for a malina kiss and was stopped, despite that happening in the book...Like baby girl who is stopping you!? Who is that darklina stan on the production that vetoed you? I kid but the show is definitely putting a lot of emphasis on darklina being a romantic relationship and less the Darkling doing a big manipulation.

I know this, based on what has been said and what I know (which isn’t a lot) about production: 

a) they almost definitely blew a good bit of money on getting ben.  he’s way more experienced than most of the cast (the guy playing Matthias had only been in a short before this, so he probably got paid next to nothing) he’d well-known, he’s had significant roles in major shows and movies before.  he’s not like this massive A-lister but he’s a known entity and while I’m sure he “argued for the part” with the the tumblr manips of him as the darkling, he was reached out to first, he did not reach out about the show first, and I would bet that the role was his without him auditioning.  like, if ben barnes wanted the role, his age was not a big issue for them.  he was a priority, and therefore the darkling was a priority.

b) in contrast, and this is NO SHADE to archie, who seems super nice (no comment on his acting skills because I haven’t seen him in much; he was fine as Mal, I just don’t think anyone save like..... someone high caliber could’ve saved that role) but I’m fairly certain that archie got the role in part because he and Ben had played antagonistically against one another in Gold Digger.  he might’ve even had a good word put in for him?  (he played a guy who was mad bc ben barnes was absolutely destroying his mom’s pussy, by the way.). they seem to really get along well.  but if that’s the case, that tells you the level of thought put into casting mal.  like they say it just took them foreeeeever to find their mal like he was some kind of scarlett o’hara, but i just.  don’t.  buy.  it.  especially not when he already had ties to ben.

c) the comments the showrunner made about “fighting for a kiss” are bullshit lmao i’m sorry.  like eric seems like a nice dude, but it’s his show, the kiss was in the books.  the only reason why i can think that they didn’t want to put in a kiss is that if she kissed mal before she kissed the darkling it would look like she was cheating on mal and mal was getting cucked; and if she kissed mal soon after she kissed the darkling everyone would be comparing the malina kiss to the darklina kiss and like..... we know what the darklina kiss came off as.

d) it’s entirely possible that they were surprised by exactly hoooooow intense jessie and ben’s chemistry ended up being while filming?  as well?  

e) i do think they want to please leigh because life is just easier if the original creator likes what you do and isn’t shit-talking it.  and leigh doesn’t like darklina.  which is fine, that’s her prerogative... but as she herself has said, the show is not the books.  the showrunner has to have the freedom to do what he wants and both he and netflix have to have the ability to please their audience and attract and retain viewers.

f) the latter of which, I PROMISE, was a part of why ben was cast.  tons of people are more intrigued by this show because he’s in it, not just because he’s Generational Crush Bin Bons, but because he’s like a Legit Actor and has a vibe that steers the show away from simple YA.

g) so eric (the showrunner) is probably walking a tightrope of not looking like he’s going tooooo off-book and pleasing leigh while at the same time building his own creation and entity.  it’s obvious that production is into darklina based off the soft edit the show gave the darkling and the discussion of it in promo, but they also feel like the best way to fix The Mal Problem is to make mal more likable versus changing canon, because then everyone will be happy.  except mal is a very fucking hard character to make likable, and attempting to do it by beating us over the head with him and meadow scenes didn’t work.

h) they’re between a rock and a hard place.  because they’re selling this series as so solid because it’s based on a very successful book series, but that book series......... had a FAMOUSLY disliked ending.  i wasn’t even into it and i couldn’t get through my dash without running into discussion about how much everyone hated that ending after the final book came out.  darklina shippers were made, nikolina shippers were made, alina independent stans were mad--very few people liked mal. so how do you deal with an ending that so many people liked without insulting the original author or showing a lack of confidence in your original material?

FASCINATING.

[okaybutlikeimagine]

Hi first of I spend last night reading through so many of your asks they’re AMAZING. It got me thinking about Billy’s first birthday at the cabin. I feel like he wouldn’t tell anyone about his birthday because they were never a big deal for him and they’d discover it was his birthday a few weeks later and they’d feel really bad about it. So they pick a day in the next week and treat it like his birthday as a surprise and Billy is completely overwhelmed by the all love. Thoughts?

First off: you’re so damn sweet, @kingsandsaints, goodness me thanks hun ♥ (also this was so long ago but I legit started writing this right after you asked it god i’m so sorry it’s taken this long to finish)

Second OHMYGOD i love this idea so much!!!

Okay, legit the only person who knows the exact day of Billy’s birthday is Max. Like, not even Steve knows.

Billy just never talks about it. And I mean never. For as much of a ham as this boy is, he doesn’t actually like all that much attention from most people. Especially the people at school. He’s so sick of them- he’s so sick of everyone hanging off of him and touching him like he’s there to be touched. Like he’s there as their toy to play with. Like he’s there for their entertainment.

He gets so fed up.

Bc Billy is no open book. He’s real good at keeping his emotions pushed down and hidden away. He’s a private person and he’s very adamant about that because, as far as he’s concerned, no one needs to know any of his business. And his birthday is very much his business. It’s his day, his life, his choice on whether he wants to tell people and his choice is… nope.

He debated telling Steve this year just to hold it over his head bc Steve was being a bitch and Billy just wanted to hang out and smoke and suck the boy’s dick or something. But he decided against it. bc if he tells one person, he runs the risk of way more people knowing and then they fuss and they coddle and they pay way too much attention to him and he doesn’t need that.

So his birthday comes and goes and no one is the wiser. Hop picks a small fight with him that morning about drinking out of the milk carton, El accidentally scuffs a pair of his favorite boots as she was stomping around the house, and he got a C on his math test even though he finally felt fucking good about it. His teacher gives him so much attitude and he wants to pull someone’s teeth out.

But it’s a normal day. And he’d rather take the comfort of a normal day over the extravagance of some day people decide they’re obligated to be ‘nice’ to him. He doesn’t need that shit. He doesn’t need fake pity or kindness.

But, y’know… he still goes out with Max.

Bc she’d be pissed if he didn’t at least see her on his birthday. She’s gotten bratty about it. When his birthday comes around she likes to cross her arms and scowl and pout and stand in his way until he gives in and drives them down to the nearest ice cream place so she can buy him an ice cream cone or something. It’s really stupid. He thinks it’s stupid. No he doesn’t smile at all on their little adventure, thank you. And if his chest feels warm when she hands the ice cream over with that smug look on her face that Billy can’t help but think she learned from him… well he’d never ever admit to it.

This year is no different. After school he forgoes hanging out with Steve or heading home to cart El around to wherever she wants to go in favor of driving Max to the nearest ice cream place, which happens to be the next town over.

They’re bantering and bickering with each other, Max asking if she’s still the only one he keeps in his life who knows about his birthday.

“Yup.” He says, fixing the cuffs on his jean jacket. She rolls her eyes.

“Seriously? It’s still a secret?”

“Yeah, and you better keep it, you brat.

“Shut up, what flavor do you want?”

He puts his hands on his hips. “You know what I always get, Roc-”

“Yeah, yeah.” She turns to the person at the counter. “One… two scoops of Rocky Road please.”

Billy eyes her suspiciously.

“In a dipped cone.”

“Alright, what’d you do.” Billy asks, fixing the cuff on his other sleeve.

“Nothing.” Max sounds tired.

“… you break one of my records?”

“No!”

“Scratch my car?”

“Oh my god, no.” She’s rolling her eyes.

He gets down to her level, eyeing her curiously, lifting an eyebrow and then the other before asking:

“You kill someone?”

“Shut up, Billy! Oh my god.”

He straightens out with a dark chuckle. “How am i supposed to know? You’re not exactly the generous type.”

“You’re so full of shit.” She grabs the cone and shoves it his way (as if that was easier than him getting it himself, which it definitely wasn’t) before ordering her own scoop of strawberry.

They sit and enjoy the kind of humorously comfortable silence that only they have with each other before Max breaks it.

“You need to tell someone.”

Billy hits her with a look.

“I’m serious, Billy.”

“Yeah, so am I, brat. Who gives a fuck about my birthday?”

“Well no one if you don’t tell them.”

“Exactly.” Billy stares at his cone as he takes a large lick. “Looking to keep it that way.”

Max rolls her eyes. “You’re so damn stubborn.”

And billy goes about the rest of the day and then the rest of the week, more than happy to be stubborn as fuck until…

Well until one day in the next week where everyone’s acting… strange. Really strange. All antsy and secretive around him, quiet about the way they speak to each other and giving him these weird glances that make him think he’s out of the loop. Make him know he is and this is the shit he tries to avoid. He doesn’t like the whole “not knowing” thing. He likes to be in the know.

And that’s all what makes him dread coming home that day from school. Steve said he was too busy to let him come over but wouldn’t say why (Steve is the worst liar Billy’s ever known. He wonders if he’s just a bad liar to Billy or if he’s this way with everyone) so he has nowhere to go but home. And it’s not even fear in his body, it’s just nerves because there’s something going on and he doesn’t know about it.

So he walks up to the house quietly and slowly, eyes shifting over to the window before he reaches the door to see if he can see anything but the curtains are closed.

And then he’s opening the door slowly, trying to prepare himself for whatever’s going on, probably overpreparing himself if he thinks about it too much, and-

“Surprise!”

Billy flinches.

Bc while he was definitely prepared for something, some kind of surprise, potentially for his birthday (which he wasn’t actually dreading. Not that he would admit to it), he wasn’t prepared for confetti being thrown in his face.

Billy covers his eyes, wiping the little pieces of paper off.

“Oh, honey!” comes Joyce’s voice. Billy begins rubbing at his eyes and sees a blurry vision of Joyce gently taking hold of El’s arm. “Try to avoid his face.”

Billy groans a bit. He tries to make it sound like he’s not irritated.

“What’s going on?”

“Happy Birthday, Billy!” comes a chorus of voices that sounds like Max, El, and 2 quiet Byers brothers.

Billy shakes his head, scanning the people that are there, trying his goddamn best not to let his face split into a smile because… because… well what the fuck.

Everyone’s here. El, Max, Jim, Will, Jonathan, Joyce… 

And Billy is absolutely beside himself. He never quite understood that phrase until exactly this moment. He feels like he’s viewing this from a spot slightly to the left of where he is, watching himself watch in awe at these people that are… that are his, aren’t they? That went out of their way… stopped their day, honestly, just to do this. To celebrate him and his existence and this is a little ridiculous. For a second he remembers why he finds birthdays a little silly. They’re all looking at him with smiles on their faces like they’re just happy he’s here and it’s… it’s just ridiculous. Why?

He scans his surroundings in a second, though it feels like slow motion. He sees the streamers along the ceiling that were probably placed there by El (with the help of Hop), a banner in the back with ‘Happy Birthday Billy!’ written on it that was definitely painted by Will, blue balloons floating around everywhere with curly ribbons hanging off of a few of them, a couple of gift-wrapped presents on the coffee table, and then his… his family, standing right in front of him, beaming like he did something right.

He shakes his head again, the words still floating through the air.

“It’s not my birthday.” Billy says in vain, because he knows that’s not the point here. A couple of chuckles hit the air, but Billy’s still eyeing the decorations around him.

“We’re making it your birthday.” Comes Will’s voice, and Billy turns to see him smiling wide. Billy rolls his eyes, biting the inside of his bottom lip to stop the smile forming.

“You guys are-”

There’s a knock at the door behind him.

He takes a second to turn, still dealing with the slight shock flooding through his system that only deepens when he finds Steve on the other side.

Steve’s smile widens quickly.

“Happy Birthday.” He says like he’s saying ‘I love you’ and it makes Billy’s chest burn.

“I-”

“I got you something.” Steve says, pushing a (poorly) wrapped present into Billy’s chest, forcing him to take it. It’s heavy.

“You guys are ridiculous.” Billy mumbles down to the present he’s now holding close to his chest, fully aware of his face turning pink. And it only gets pinker because Steve decides to lean over and kiss Billy’s cheek and he’s gonna riot. He’s gonna fight someone for making him feel so seen.

Billy’s still standing in the doorway when Steve yells out “I brought the cake!” To the rest of the room and moves around Billy to walk into the cabin.

Billy stands there for a minute, willing his blush to go down before he closes the door and ventures into prey.

And it’s… quite the evening. Hop puts on one of Billy’s favorite records and helps Joyce make burgers and homemade french fries (that are either very crispy or very soft) for them all to eat. As they’re getting the food ready, El pulls Billy to dance with her and Will and Max as Jonathan shows Steve where to put the birthday cake and Billy is… 

Billy is kind of floating in place, being pulled around by El to the beat of the music and he kind of just wants to sit. El notices Max drag Billy over to the sofa, so she grabs onto Will instead, spinning around with him.

“Happy birthday, jerk.” Max sits on the sofa.

Billy flops next to her onto the couch in response, looking at the decorations around him before absent-mindedly pulling on the ribbon of one of the balloons.

“Do you like your party?” Max asks, leaning forward to look the boy in the eye. He just kind of scoffs a bit.

“I… I dunno what to do.” Billy says, pulling the balloon down to eye level before letting it float back up and doing it all over again. It’s an oddly nervous gesture that he doesn’t feel he has very much control of. “This is so… awkward. This is why I didn’t want anyone knowing. Birthday parties are so dumb.”

“It’s just because you’ve never had one.” Max says, punching Billy’s shoulder lightly. He pulls the balloon back down again so he can bat it into Max’s face.

“Hey!” She shrieks a bit, swiping it away.

Billy notices Jonathan walk up to them then, and he looks up to find Steve has gotten swept up in the dancing.

“You good?” Jonathan asks, settling himself next to Billy to watch his brother and El spin poor Steve around like crazy. He hands Billy an opened beer bottle. “Courtesy of Hop, by the way. He said the birthday boy deserves one.”

Billy chuckles as he accepts it. “Thanks. And yeah, I guess.” he mumbles up against the lip of the bottle before taking a swig. “S’just weird.”

“Don’t like parties?” Jonathan asks with a smirk on his face.

“Not really.” Billy swats at Max’s hand as she reaches for his bottle.

“Hm… I don’t believe you.”

His grin is smarmy. Billy glares weakly at it. “I don’t. Not parties about me. What’s that thing about big parties having more privacy?”

Jonathan laughs. “Are you quoting The Great Gatsby?”

Billy shoves his shoulder into Jonthan’s. “I don’t fucking know! I guess? There’s something… different about people looking at me when I don’t really know them. It’s easier that way.” He takes a nervous swig of his beer.

“Well, if you want, we can all ignore you for the rest of the night.” Jonathan offers with a smirk, leaning back on the sofa. Billy grabs a pillow from the couch to shove into Jonathan’s face.

“Shut up.”

“I’m serious. I’d be more than happy to ignore you. Easiest birthday gift I’ll ever give.”

“You’re so nice to me, Byers.”

“I know, my generosity is endless.”

The two are near laughing with each other when Max makes a confused noise next to them.

“You guys are weird.” She says with a scrunched up look on her face. She’s going to get up to join the dancing when Joyce and Hop call everyone to dinner.

And it’s… it’s nice. The food is good and the conversation is fairly easy. Hop and Joyce ask Billy a few questions about how his day was and how he feels now that he’s 18 and how he’s a really “handsome and confident young man” (Joyce’s words) that may or may not make Billy tear up and have to hide it in his burger. He’s thankful that Jonathan notices something’s up (maybe even gives him pity, though Billy doesn’t want to think about that) and changes the subject while Steve puts a comforting and warm hand on Billy’s thigh.

The conversation shifts away from him and he’s thankful for it. They joke around and laugh and smile and then Hop’s putting on a different record as they sit Billy down to open up his presents.

And this is where he feels every bit of awkwardness, because everyone’s sitting around waiting for him to open the presents that they specifically bought for him. Waiting for his reactions to these things that are being given to him with the implication of putting a smile on his face and it’s just… the weirdest sort of pressure?

And he likes these people. They’re like… they’re his family now. So he can’t even just not care about how they feel about his reactions. He wants to make them feel good about what they gave him.

But it’s really not that hard, bc, lo and behold, these people actually know him pretty well. It’s a… weird feeling. He can’t remember the last time he got a present from someone who actually cared this much. Max hasn’t bought him a present ever bc he makes such a big deal about hating his birthday. But here he is, a little bundle of presents in front of him and he… he feels spoiled. It’s a first that’s been happening for a few months now. Every day that he gets that spoiled feeling feels like the first time bc it’s so alien. He’s not sure he’ll ever get used to it.

So he opens them up slowly. There’s a little gray box from Will, with a cool as hell charm on a chain inside. It’s a little skull, delicately painted in various metallic colors. It almost looks mosaic from the paint.

“It’s an earring.” Will explains in a nervous, bouncy kind of excitement. “I found the charm and then painted it.”

Billy’s amazed at the detail. He musses up Will’s hair with a smile and gives his thanks, taking his own earring out to put his new one in.

There’s a very poorly wrapped present leaning up against the table, labeled “From El and Max ♥”. From the shape of the crinkly, potentially used wrapping paper, Billy thinks he has an inkling of what it is. He still acts shocked when he opens it, if only just for El.

“Skateboard!”

And my lovely friend @okayshitbird helped me out w/ ideas for presents for Billy and had this WONDERFUL idea of 1. Max yearning to skate w/ Billy again bc we both agree that Billy 120% used to be a skater back in Cali before he got a car AND taught Max how to skate. And also 2. El wanting to learn to skate bc she thinks Max is so cool and i think we can ALL agree that we were ROBBED of Max and El skating w/ each other. SO.

Billy opens it up to find a skateboard. And it’s like… a nice one. It’s clearly not brand new, it’s got a little bit of use on it’s wheels and a couple scratches already, but it’s obviously close to new. The deck itself is pretty sweet, too. The pattern is neon and psychedelic looking, and it takes a couple of seconds for Billy to make out a picture of a frog with large eyes, hidden in the chaos of the pattern. It looks… familiar.

Bc @okayshitbird ALSO had the wonderful idea of El and Max maybe possibly asking Heather for help in lifting a skateboard they may or may not have seen in the Lost and Found at the pool. And Heather definitely rolled her eyes, but she thinks Billy’s kid sister is funny so she did it for them for the low low price of a package of her favorite bubblegum. She’s nothing if not kind and generous.

But Billy remembers when he had to confiscate this. He shoots a skeptical look at the girls.

“Looks kinda… familiar. Where’d ya get it?”

“Oh uh… we may have had some help-” Max begins before-

“Heather!” El cuts in.

Max covers El’s mouth. “It doesn’t really matter where we got it, does it? But it’s yours now!” Max hurriedly grabs the board and places it down under the coffee table. “Alright, next gift.”

The next gift is in a paper bag with a little bow placed on the front. Billy pulls out the gift.

“A sweater?” Billy asks, looking to Hop and Joyce, who he assumes this is from.

“You need warm clothes.” Hop says flatly.

“Fine-”

“For the love of god, please don’t rip holes in it.”

“Fine.” Billy says with more attitude this time, putting the bag down and seeing something at the bottom of it. He looks in curiously to see a $20 bill folded up neatly. (keep in mind, back in0 1985 that’s like… $50 bucks by today’s standards.)

Billy shoots Hop a knowing look and Hop gives a nod and a little smile.

“Thanks pops.” Billy says with a little smile of his own, shoving the sweater back in the bag. He feels a little weird about pulling money out in front of everyone, so he doesn’t, but he wants him to know he appreciates it.

“Yeah yeah.” Hop nods and mumbles into the lip of his beer bottle.

The last gift on the table is the one Steve shoved at Billy.

“Best for last?” Billy mumbles a snarky little thing in Steve’s direction, revelling in the embarrassed look Steve gives.

“No no, it’s nothing.” Steve says nervously.

Except obviously that’s wrong. Bc obviously Steve 1. Is very rich and 2. Spoils Billy absolutely rotten (or at least…. As much as Billy allows for). And hell- the present is HEAVY. Like…… there’s definitely something in that box.

And Billy’s honestly irritated when he opens it. Bc goddamn it Steve…

“Do you like it?” Steve is wringing his hands.

It’s a portable stereo. Like… a brand new one. An expensive one. Billy doesn’t have one- he left his old stereo back in his old house, not wanting to carry anything he didn’t need in the move. When he listens to music he either forces Jonathan to let him use his player or he listens to records on the record player out in the living room or he just… sits in his car.

“Woah.” Jonathan mumbles, leaning in a little closer from his spot on the side chair to look at it.

Billy’s heart is fluttering.

“Billy?” Steve asks, voice obviously nervous but Billy’s a little caught up bc goddamnit. He’s… he hates being spoiled but this thing is sick and then Steve’s hand is reaching out for his knee and Billy kisses Steve’s cheek quickly and knocks his shoulder into him.

“Thanks, pretty boy.”

And Steve is blushing and so is Billy and Max is smirking and Jonathan notices Joyce is about to start cooing like she always does so he decides to save Billy from the embarrassment. Someone give him that “brother of the year” award already.

“Well open it, I wanna see.”

So Billy tears into the box, taking the stereo out and shit it’s nice. All metallic blue and steel and buttons and dials and shit it’s gonna sound so nice.

They cut into the cake (Billy refuses to let them all sing happy birthday to him, even though Max and El still do, as loud as possible, as Joyce cuts everyone a slice)(Billy tries to tickle them to get them to stop, but they just dodge him) and if Billy is feeling warmth in his chest, he’ll blame it on… heartburn or something.

It’s not too long after everyone is done with their cake that Joyce yawns, claiming herself tired. Jim nods, giving Billy the biggest bear hug possible- y’know, to really embarrass him- before heading to get ready for bed. He throws in a “Happy birthday son.” for good measure as well, to which Billy, with a strained voice as he’s being squished, says “S’not my birthday.”

El attacks Billy with a hug, Max right behind her and joining in.

“Happy birthday, you idiot.” Max mumbles. Billy pulls at her hair. Max swats at his arm before getting dragged off to El’s room to probably listen to music or read comic books or something before they crash for the night.

Billy’s the one who initiates a hug from Will, bc the sweet boy, bless him, is standing there so awkwardly, feet moving nervously with each other, mumbling a quiet “Happy birthday, Billy.” Billy doesn’t let that slide though, grabbing roughly onto his shoulder and pulling him into a tight hug, giving a gruff “Thanks, pipsqueak.” bc Billy doesn’t even try to hide it: Will is his favorite of the kids.

Joyce is still moving around the kitchen, putting plates away and refusing help from Steve, moving even after the plates are all put away, wiping at the counter like it needs to be cleaned even though it doesn’t, when Billy catches Jonathan’s eye.

Jonathan brings a hand up to his mouth, pretending to bite at his nail before his fingers move to look like he’s smoking. Billy nods, and Jonathan gives a little smile, turning to Steve and nodding at him. Steve, however, is oblivious. Bc Steve doesn’t know their weird little ~signals~ they give each other bc Billy and Jonathan always seem to be talking in some kind of code. They’re so weird w/ each other. No one understands them.

So Steve is confused.

“What?”

Jonathan rolls his eyes. Smoke. Jonathan mouths, but Steve’s eyebrows furrow.

“Smo-?”

Billy grabs Steve’s hand. “Get outside, moron.” Billy mumbles, pulling him towards the back of the house, where Jonathan is already lazily walking to.

“Oh, Billy! Can I uhm…” Joyce begins, obviously nervous. “Can I talk to you?”

Billy’s nervous now, too.

By the time she’s done digging through the drawer for whatever it is she’s looking for, Jonathan and Steve are already out on the back porch. She’s holding an envelope with a ribbon tied around it.

“I uhm… I know it doesn’t really matter as much… now that you’re 18 and all. But here’s my present to you.”

Billy eyes it curiously, taking gentle hold of the envelope, untying the ribbon, opening it up.

And thanks AGAIN to @okayshitbird for the idea bc-

“It’s the adoption papers. For my side. If you want!”

She’s so nervous but Billy’s only vaguely aware now bc… Bc his heart is dropping. She wants him to be her son. Like… for real.

She’s still rambling a bit, talking about how she doesn’t wanna force him and “you don’t have to” and “I just wanted to give you the option” and-

Billy throws the papers onto the counter to hug her. Bc goddamnit this comes with a lot of emotions. too many emotions but the good outweigh the bad and he’s a little overwhelmed and-

“Thank you.”

Joyce gives a strong hug back.

“No need to thank me, honey.”

And so she sends him a warm smile and a quiet “happy birthday” before heading to bed. Billy goes to tuck the papers back into the envelope. He places them in a safe spot in one of his drawers in his room.

When he gets outside, still a little shocked, Jonathan’s finished rolling the joint and is laughing easily with Steve.

“Finally.” Steve says, pouting a bit and reaching for Billy. “Jonathan’s been ribbing me this whole time.”

Jonathan shrugs lazily. “Somebody has to.”

“I get enough from him.” Steve says, pointing to Billy. “I get all I need from him.”

There’s some kind of insinuation in it that makes Jonathan gag.

“Please stop now. He’s my brother.” Jonathan pulls a face.

Billy’s mind is a little busy. Gets even busier at the word brother. The other boys notice.

“You alright, babe?” Steve asks quietly. Billy turns to Jonathan.

“You’re… you’re actually gonna be my brother, now.”

“Huh?”

“Joyce is adopting me.”

Jonathan’s silent, eyes getting wide. “Really?”

Billy nods. Steve breathes out a bit. Everyone understands the implication. Bc they know Billy now. They know how important this is for him. They know this is big.

They’re quiet for a second.

“Damn, does this mean I have to be nice to you?” Jonathan asks before the placing the joint in his mouth and lighting it. Billy laughs.

“If you are, I’ll send you to the psych ward.”

“No need.” Jonathan says, exhaling smoke and handing the joint to Billy. “They’d send me away for being too crazy.”

“That sure?” Billy asks before he inhales.

“Once I get to talking about the monsters that abducted my brother, yeah.”

Billy and Jonathan laugh. Steve has a bit of a harder time keeping up with how the tone shifted so quickly. He’s not sure he’ll ever understand these two.

They each take a couple of puffs on the joint in silence before Jonathan jumps to life again.

“Oh, go grab your fancy new stereo and put this in.”

He tosses a cassette in Billy’s direction. Billy has to unwrap his arm from around Steve’s shoulders quickly to catch it.

“Oh shit, Motley Crue’s new album? Sweet. I didn’t know you like them?” Billy’s in awe and Steve leans in to look at the track list.

“I don’t.” Jonathan chuckles a bit. “It’s for you, genius.”

Billy looks up in confusion. Jonathan rolls his eyes.

“Happy birthday.”

“Serious?”

“What? God forbid I buy you something?” Jonathan asks, standing up a bit to accept the joint from Steve. “Just get your stereo.”

Billy chuckles back a thanks.

And so they listen to the tape. Jonathan admits he was deciding between a few (Ratt, AC/DC, or this) but picked this tape bc he doesn’t hate the song “Smokin’ In The Boys Room”. Steve admits he thinks every song sounds like the last and gets a slap on the thigh from Billy, who huffs harshly on the joint at the words. Jonathan makes eye contact w/ Steve to let him know he agrees. Then Billy decides that the heavy guitar of “Save Our Souls” is too seductive and hot not to start making out with Steve, to which Jonathan makes a gagging noise and gets up.

“Gross.” He groans, standing up and burning the last of the joint out. “I’m heading to bed.”

Billy waves at Jonathan from where he’s locked onto Steve’s lips, but Steve pulls away to give a proper goodbye, his face red.

“Uh, g’night Jonathan!”

“Yeah, goodnight.” Billy mumbles into the skin of Steve’s neck.

Jonathan rolls his eyes, but Billy doesn’t see it.

“Just don’t fuck on the porch.” Jonathan says flatly before heading into the house and being careful to close the door quietly.

“You’re so embarrassing.” Steve chastises before pulling Billy back up to kiss him soundly.

They make out a little more, sitting just like that, listening to the music nice and clear on his new stereo.

“Did you have a nice birthday?” Steve asks quietly, rubbing Billy’s sides.

“Yeah… but I still think you’re all ridiculous.”

Steve laughs, leaning back in for another kiss.

[cupofkey]

ok so literally nobody asked for this but ever since I made this post my thoughts have been consumed with the relationship between Vietnam, Cambodia, and Laos, so have a big rambly mess under the cut

(disclaimer, I don’t view the nations as geopolitical entities or direct representations so much as representatives of their people. so they’re impacted by politics and governments but they’re also their own people with personalities, relationships, lives etc. like Being A Nation is a big part of their lives, obvious as it may seem. so their strongest ties are to their people, their culture, and their nation status. and I believe they have their people’s best interests at heart, and that’s over everything else, including ideology... which is a really big part of any discussions of 20th century southeast asia. I think things were different in the past, but as nations wised up and the world began to change, they’ve kind of let go of associating too closely with govts.)

gosh okay so. these three grew up with each other; Vietnam is the oldest and usually was the one in charge. back in the days when they were younger, pre-colonialism and before they were all kingdoms, they weren’t the closest? Cambodia was kinda distant from all of them and working on his own stuff, Laos was the youngest and really leaning on Thailand for guidance at the beginning, Vietnam was also focused on doing her own thing and struggling against China. as they became kingdoms they started having clashes, border disputes, that kinda stuff— idk, I think that kind of “all my neighbors are my enemies” dynamic was pretty common, and so it wasn’t anything super deep between them. there was definitely some resentment toward Vietnam for being the bigger power, though

there was a period of prosperity, and Laos started to rely on Vietnam more... and then colonization happened, and suddenly they were all shoved into one thing as French Indochina. Laos, still the youngest, ended up relying even more on Vietnam, who was still the main player of the group. Cambodia felt even more alienated from them (and resentful toward Vietnam, for what he perceived as taking the position as the dominant one throughout their history, along with having the most favor with France). however colonialism began to really take its toll on all of them, and as WWII began and Indochina came under Japanese control, I think these uneasy dynamics fell apart between them. they all acutely felt the traumas of having many starkly divided groups within themselves, the horrors of colonization, the machinations of ideology... I think there was a breaking point of sorts during/after this period (as their people endured brutalization at the hands of their govts) where these 3 reached out to each other as their bodies/nations started to be figuratively/literally torn apart.

and idk like I said I don’t personally hc most nations as fallible to ideology. at least not in the 20th century... they can be deluded, they can buy into it, they can go along with things, but it’s all for their people first and foremost. they don’t truly believe in anything like that anymore. (well, with the exception of America, but he’s young.) and I guess I also hc that they became pretty powerless within a govt context, and that the govt can’t really do much about or with them. anyways yea I think at that point they started to drift away from going with their governments, letting go of rivalry on a personal level. their govts hate each other, but they band together.

but so much shit happened throughout the 60s and 70s... and I think as their governments began to really harm their people, drive each other apart, civil wars raging, etc they continued to seek each other out. I think Cambodia especially felt a lot of pain when his government took a fiercely anti-Vietnam stance, like it was some kind of dark fulfillment of his anger against her from all those years ago, and now he had to pay for that. Laos also had conflicting feelings about Vietnam, seeing as her government was also following her lead of relying on Vietnam in the past, except now it was just contributing to the conflicts going on. the events of this time must have made them feel so incredibly alone— and so whenever they met each other I think they really just. understood each other without words. when Vietnam struggles to stand up, when she can’t hold her chopsticks without dropping them, they understand, because they’ve been through civil war too and they know the toll it takes. when Cambodia is in too much pain to move, they understand, because they’ve been through their governments directly harming and killing their people, and they know what that feels like. like... they just understand each other now. every day is more trauma and pain as their governments are at each other’s throats, and they have to somehow reconcile govt and people and their own personal feelings.

when the khmer rouge is finally deposed of (by Vietnamese forces) it seems like it’ll be a turning point— but there’s just more and more turmoil, and I think they kinda drifted apart again in this period. Cambodia was thankful but quickly became bitter about the Vietnamese presence in his country... I think they were all just. exhausted at this point. the worst of the worst has passed but there’s still so much suffering. however as the years pass and they get into the ‘90s and ‘00s, their countries and economies begin to do better, and they can finally breathe for just a moment and begin to process all of the trauma of the previous century. (rather than just, well, shoving it away because staying alive is more important rn.) ofc there are still plenty of problems. and so they seek each others company when things are feeling off, when old wounds resurface, or when shitty things are happening with their govts. like I’m thinking abt how Laos has a nervous breakdown when they’re clearing unexploded ordnance (bombs etc) from some of her cultural heritage sites bc it’s just... overwhelming and awful how scarred her people have become from this legacy of war. and Cambodia and Vietnam are there for her throughout the whole thing, they listen to her, they feed her, they sit with her so she doesn’t have to be alone. because she’s not. they know exactly what she’s feeling, they also acutely feel that pain of lives and culture lost to war.

nowadays, things are easier between them, and they seem like chill work acquaintances to most people. I think they often stick to their own friends or stay in big groups in public situations? like they’re friends in a smaller, private context, and not many people will get to see that other side of them. when they do get together, they just... exist together. sometimes one of them is upset about something and the others are there to listen. on dates like black april for example they’ll often make a ton of food and put on corny old pop music and just Be without fear of judgment or people not understanding. also I’d imagine Vietnam sometimes puts on Paris By Night or other stuff made by her diaspora about her traumas, and they talk about those individuals’ small efforts to share their own feelings, the impacts of their traumas as nations on said human individuals. idk I think they really have helped each other a lot via discussions like that, and just by supporting each other in general. lots of quiet listening and Just Being There here. they don’t say it, but they care a lot, and if they can ease each other’s pain just a little bit it’s all okay.

anyways jesus fuck that was long and I have so many emotions about them. I have fr just made up a whole thing in my brain and I will keep thinking about this. but thanks for reading this far and feel free to tell me what u think... yea

[softforcal]

hiiii listen i love hogwarts!5sos so please do HCs for gryffindor ash x gryffindor reader x hufflepuff calum bc it would honestly be the cutest poly relationship ever

gryffindor ash x gryffindor reader x hufflepuff calum

-you and Ashton have been best buds forever

-there’s always been something there but neither of you have ever acted on it.

-Calum and Ashton are their Quidditch House Captains so they know each other and they get along

-they have a few classes together and often sit next to each other, as a sign of ‘house bond’ but they genuinely just enjoy each other

-they’re always discussing Quidditch or muggle tattoos or shit like that

-you show up at lunch one day and Calum is sitting at the Gryffindor table, they’re both deep in conversation but when you sit down next to Ashton and across from Calum, they stop talking

-Ashton introduces you to the GORGEOUS Hufflepuff who you’ve seen around but never actually talked to

-Ashton has a way for slotting people into conversations and making sure people don’t feel left out and within minutes, you’re laughing with them and its a great time

-you go to your next class and they go to theirs, while walking Calum just sort of states, “she’s pretty cute.” and Ashton is shook that his lil Puff friend just said something so bold and out there. but like… “yeah she’s gorgeous.”

-”so uh… is she single?”

-Ashton is so shook.

-no one has ever asked him about you before because everyone in your house sort of knows Ashton’s had a thing for you since first year but this little Puff boy has no clue

-”yeah she’s single.”

-something spurs to life inside Ashton

-because like… he’s never had legit competition before?

-but also… he and Cal are such dope friends already so he’s like… woah. like part of me wants my bro to succeed but i want myself to succeed to so wtf is this feeling

-the whole day he’s thinking about a way for it to work for everyone

-and polyamory comes to mind

-and he is WAY to ahead of himself

-Gryffindor Ashton exists on a plane of being where he’s like a month ahead of everyone else cuz boy thinks ahead

-so Calum has no idea Ashton’s thinking about this so hard but the next day at lunch when Ashton shows up, you and Cal (who were waiting for him) can both tell there’s something off about him

-”you look like you’re thinking real hard, stop.” you giggled

-”what do you guys think about polyamory?”

-Calum chokes on his drink and Ashton has to pat him on the back.

-”why are you bringing this up?” you ask, watching in amusement

-Ashton tries to act suave and you buy it because you have no reason not to. the three of you chat about it, Cal looks super distressed but you can’t tell why, and after lunch Calum pulls Ashton aside and is like “what the fuck man?”

-Ashton explains he’s been into you for ages and Calum’s like “well i’ll back off if she’s taken man, no harm done.” and Ashton’s just like… “but… but Polyamory sounds kinda dope don’t you think?”

-and Cal kind of thinks about it and is like… “okay im in but we have to ask the girl out first right?”

-they plan all day

-like… extensive planning

-which mostly consists of Ashton coming up with ideas and Calum telling Ashton they won’t work

-”we could take her to The Three Broom Sticks-” “too many people and she’ll totally think it’s a friend thing unless we call it a date.”

-”we could go for a swim in the black lake.” “first, kinda rapey bud, second, its like October.”

-”we could go to the forbidden forest” “Ashton.”

-they’re walking down the hallway discussing it and suddenly a door appears.

-Ashton opens it and starts laughing, “the room of requirement is our pimp now.”

-yeah, the room has set the boys up well

-like. there’s a full on king sized bed whenever they need it and it seems the room is like Ashton, always thinking steps ahead

-Calum finally suggests just doing a study date in the library

-”well she’ll think we’re just friends.” “we gotta tell her its a date.” “right.”

-so they both come ask you

-”we want to take you on a date.” “a study date.” Calum clarifies. “still a date.”

-you’re kind of shook then you glare at Ashton, “this is why you asked about polyamory!”

-he shrugs and grins, “it seems like a good idea.”

-i mean. kinda false.

-but it’s not like you’re going to turn down two of the most gorgeous guys in school who are also complete adorable dorks

-so you go to the library and find the most secluded corner

-it’s honestly just studying but you know they’re both into you so thats fun

-and then Ashton’s arm confidently goes over your shoulders and Calum rests his hand on top of yours and you’re just like… i could get FUCKING USED TO THIS

-so Cal is so soft and adorable

-and Ash is cocky and giggly

-so wow. they’re both perfect

-and then you ask the age old question

-”so if we do this… which house colours do i wear to Quidditch games.”

-”mine.” they both say at once

-a small discussion about it

-”but… she’s been wearing your colours forever-” “thats because she’s in my house Cal.” “well… yellow would look cute on her.” “red looks cute on her.”

-these boys

-finally Ashton concedes and is like… “if we do this, you can wear his colours first if you want but we have to switch each time to be fair.”

-the first poly agreement is made and it wasn’t actually that hard. compromise was found.

-this could work

-spending the whole week testing it out with cute dates and hand holding and shit but no kisses because who the fuck knows how that shit’s even gonna work

-finally you’re in the library and you’ve all been giggling about something dumb that Luke Hemmings did earlier and Calum just leans in and kisses you

-Ashton is shook that the puff had bigger balls than him

-so as soon as Cal pulls away, Ashton kisses you too

-when he pulls away they both look at you and Cal is first to ask “was that okay?”

-it was better than okay fam.

-”think we should try it again just to be sure.” you’re a Gryffindor, you gon take this opportunity sis

-Calum shocks you both AGAIN by being the first AGAIN, grabbing your face and kissing you harder this time, putting all the little Puff can put into the kiss

-when he pulls away, Ashton is sitting there stunned like “wow. how am i supposed to compete with that man?”

-no jealousy. just support and awe and general good squishy stuff

-Ashton kisses you again and he tried to be softer, going for more of a Hufflepuff vibe and you were getting whiplash from these boys

-so now that the first kiss is out of the way, everything cums comes easier

-Hufflepuff and Gryffindor have a match and you go in Cal’s scarf

-Hufflepuff wins but as soon as everyone lands, Ashton and Calum are shaking hands and Calum’s assuring Ashton that he played really well and was just unlucky

-they’re such good friends.

-they go to the change room and when they both come out all showered and cute (curls curls curls curls curls) you’re like… “you both played so well, i kind of feel like we should go somewhere and celebrate.”

-”well Hufflepuff is having an afterparty and you can both come-” Calum begins but you and Ashton grab his arms and begin to drag him because was a SWEETIE

-”So room of requirement or prefects bathroom?” Ashton ask as you call head up to the school

-”the room of requirement is pimping for you now?” you laugh

-”thats what i said!” Ashton grins

-”i vote room of requirement.” Calum quips

-so of course you do what the Puff wants

-getting to the room of requirement and Ashton notices there’s something a little different as he closes the door behind you but can’t place his finger on it until Calum goes “is that a weighted blanket!?” and runs to the bed

-”aren’t weighted blankets for people with anxiety?” Ashton asks.

-you elbow him because your little Puff looks so amused. its obvious who the blanket is for, lets be real. what a smoll baby

-so like… there is a little bit of a discussion that needs to be had about HOW exactly this is going to go down… if you catch my drift

-Ashton just starts whipping out words like “choking” and “spanking” and phrases like “fingers in your mouth” and “marks where people can’t see”

-and Calum just sits and watches the two of you sort out all the schematics

-Hufflepuff baby is honestly there just for a good time, he don’t mind HOW it happens just as long as it happens

-when you and Ashton finally agree on everything you turn to Calum who looks sort of dazed cuz he’s honestly spaced out at this point

-as soon as he notices you looking at him he just grabs you and throws you on the bed, tearing your pants off and devouring you

-Ashton just laughs cuz “i guess we had a plan but this works too.”

-Hufflepuff Cal is a pleaser thats for SURE

-he keeps surprising you and Ashton

-like he makes you cum twice from his mouth before Ashton’s finally like… “okay mate, gotta give me a turn too.”

-they’re VERY good at sharing apparently

-it would be kind of wild lets be real

-they’re only down for what you’re comfy with but… if you’re down for it… Ash is the ass man always

-Cal is oddly down for anything which is a bit of a shock

-like he spaced out when you and Ash were discussing it but in the heat of everything, his hand is going around your throat and you and Ash are shook

-laying there after, between your two boys and you and Ashton are just speechless about Cal who has shaken you both to your core

-”so are you sure you’re not secretly a Slytherin Cal?”

-”im just pretty good at finding the right spots.” Calum. what the fuck. you funky little Hufflepuff.

-lets be real. the three of you stay there all night

-being addicted to each other

-like, Ashton is always down for a quicky but even Calum starts toeing the line and putting his hand VERY HIGH on your thigh while you’re in class

-yeah, you are trying to keep it a secret but ya’ll aint suave

-everyone fucking knows

-like people see the three of you go into the room of requirement ALL the time

-finally there’s a Quidditch game where it’s Slytherin vs Gryffindor and Gryffindor kicks their ass

-as you get on the field with Calum you catch the Slytherin team captain saying to Ashton something SUPER offensive about you and Calum

-Calum just DECKS this guy

-like the Slytherin team captain is KO’ed like a MOTHERFUCKER

-and once again, you and Ashton are looking at your little Puff and he’s just like… “uh… my hand slipped?”

-what a baby

-you and Ashton take good care of Cal

-the first time his dom side comes out you’re all shook again

-Hufflepuff Cal just has a lot hidden up his sleeve

-yo. Hufflepuff Cal teaching Ashton how to find your sweet spots

-would be hot as FUCK

-ouch

-they’re such a team

-like. Cashton is a dream team but these two would be hot as fuck in these houses

-yeah i love it.

[visionmarred-archive]

5, 10, 12, 14, 19, and 32 for Sky! (Also, feel free to throw in any other numbers that you would like to answer for Sky! I will take all the Sky content ❤)

oh gladly, thank you!! I always love talking about my disaster Exile :’)

5. On an average day, what can be found in your character’s pockets?

I feel I should preface this by saying she def has a fanny pack that she uses for being on the go. Now that I’ve said that - the galaxy’s equivalent of a first aid kit, medpacks and antidote packs for more serious stuff, a little bit of makeup (lipstick, eyeliner, small portable stuff like that), a compact mirror, a blue scarf (multi-purpose, both fashionably and medically), and her old dog tags from the Mandalorian Wars. Said dog tags have a number of scratches on the back - each one was meant to represent a successful battle, but there isn’t one for Malachor V.

10. Does your character feel more comfortable with more clothing, or with less clothing?

I’d say she’s probably in the less category? She generally prefers to wear light dresses and skirts, girly feminine stuff like that. And while being outright in the nude would definitely be uncomfortable, she also had zero problems with being in her underwear on Peragus or with wearing the skimpy dancing outfit on Nar Shaddaa. (Shipping bonus for your Exile/Atton needs: Sky was def a lot more coy and flirtatious when she was younger during the wars. While she isn’t so much anymore, she did take advantage of the dancing outfit to flirt with/tease Atton. The coyness hasn’t gone away completely, and she’d already realized she liked him, so why not, right?)

12. In what situation was your character the most calm they’ve ever been?

This is a bit hard to single out bc she’s generally pretty calm, but for game canon and before, I’d say it was Sky’s fight against Darth Nihilus. She’d trained, she’d prepared, she’d done everything she could, and she was the only thing between the Sith Lord and the deaths of countless lives. With it came a calm clarity of knowing that she would defeat him, that this would end today.

For post game canon: this one fits more, buuuut I haven’t worked out the details yet of what exactly happens to Revan and Sky in the Unknown Regions. I have bits and pieces, but not a full story. Anyway, I have a pretty firm idea that at some point, she makes a stand against a small army to buy time for Revan and the others to escape Dromund Kaas  - she would stay behind and complete the ritual to seal away Vitiate, and if she died, well, so be it. And she was at peace with the idea. (Don’t worry kids, she lived. A certain someone went back for her.)

14. Does your character remember names or faces easier?

Definitely faces! This one’s just supported by how the Exile in-game comments on how Mical seems familiar. 

19. What is your character’s biggest relationship flaw? Has this flaw destroyed relationships for them before?

Sky’s a pushover and a people pleaser, and will keep secrets from people if she believes it’s for the better. She’s kind of always been that person, but the aftermath of Malachor V and dealing with her trauma amplified those traits as part of her “I must do as much good as possible to atone for this horrible act” mentality. It’d make her a good target for an abuser if she had been interested in romance in between her failed romance with Revan and her meeting Atton, since she thinks very little of herself and would go out of her way to make someone else happy. And while that can make a relationship seem happy on the surface, it really does lead to a lot of resentment on her end and can destroy things. Has it destroyed relationships? It was likely a contributing factor with Atris - their relationship was a strong and genuine friendship/mutually unrequited love, and because of her never really speaking up about her own interests, Sky’s leaving to join the Revanchists felt like it came out of left field for Atris, and a total betrayal. “It is all that is left unsaid upon which tragedies are built”, after all.

32. Describe a scenario in which your character feels most uncomfortable.

Leading the Jedi Order as one of the masters who follows the Code completely and utterly. Joining the Jedi was never something she wanted, and she’s always held doubts about the way things have been run. So to become the type of master she’s always privately feared becoming? Yeah, no. I may have just described a fear more than anything but eh, ‘tis relevant

bonus: 1. Does your character have siblings or family members in their age group? Which one are they closest with?

I’ll use this chance to talk about her brothers :) Terran y’all already know about bc I play as him, and he’s the brother that Sky is the closest with, but she also has her older brother Cloudarren. Sky and Cloud were closer when they were younger, before Sky left to join the Jedi, but after she meets Terran again in Dxun, they form a good bond with each other and make up for years of lost sibling bonding. Terran was eager to have an older sister, and while it was awkward at first since they never knew each other much (Terran being either a baby or a toddler when Sky left), they’ve since become incredibly close. She left Terran behind as well when she went to find Revan, and Terran actually helped put the idea into Atton’s and Bastila’s heads to go after them.

[twink-dan-answers]

do any of you know how to deal with major self esteem issues? it's gotten really really bad since i went to highschool (i live in Britain so i went when i was 11 and i'm now 14). i mean when i say it's bad i mean it's gotten to the point where i stop myself from buying clothes i truly like bc i don't want to go outisde and get laughed at by the six year olds in my area. i hate my weight yet i can't go to the gym with my friend bc a lot of peeps go and they'll see me and i hate everything? help??

The thing with self esteem is that it's all in your head. You're your own worst enemy. But believe me, we've all been there when it came to how we think we look. When I was a freshman in high school (I'm from the USA so I was about 14 & 15, so same as you) my self esteem wasn't the best. Actually, I think it was far worse in middle school (age 11-13). People would point out my awful hair and my acne, which is probably considered bullying the way they did it, and I slightly blame my dad for it. I mean, I lived with him and not my mom, so things were weird at that age already, but he didn't tell me things like...i should wash my face so lessen it. Or I had a step mom, and the only thing she was good for was wearing my clothes, but she didn't help me with my hair or tell me how to do it or make it look like it wasn't some rats nest after brushing it out (because my hair is curly and I learned at 19 not to brush it after showers or ever really) so they were good for nothing. Surprisingly, the thing I worried about most was my clothes and not my face or my hair, similar to you. They would buy all my clothes from this one store and I hated it. The store was meant for smaller, petite people, which I am not. My legs and arms and neck are all skinny, but my stomach and chest aren't exactly small. I would always feel fat in them, because I do have a slight gut (from not eating and drinking anything remotely healthy) and I don't do anything about it because I'm l a z y. I don't want to go to the gym, which I know you do, but are afraid. Let me tell you this: lots of people don't like going to public gyms in fear of being watched. But 9/10 times, no one actually cares. You're all there for the same reason and that's to get healthy and be in shape. You're only starting out, so don't compare yourself to all those people who look like The Rock or something. They've been at it for YEARS with bodies like those. As for your clothes choices, you should wear what makes YOU feel confident. If it's 6 year old that you're worried about....they're irrelevant. They're just kids who probably don't even know their rights and lefts. It took me a long time to realize that I shouldn't dress for others, but I should dress for me. I wear things and buy things that I like and that I'm comfortable in. Life gets easier in that sense the higher up in school you go. Because trust me, once you graduate high school, no one is going to give a single shit about the clothes you wore or the way you showed up to school. I don't even remember half of my graduating class. Life isn't about having style or carefully acting and dressing the way you think others will like you. If you want to wear crop tops and cut off jeans, do it. Just because you're not a size zero doesn't mean you can't have the body confidence you desire. There are still days when I think I'm fat or look ugly because of my acne, but honestly, it's never as bad as I think. People don't see you the same way you see yourself, even if they do. Those 4 zits on your cheek might mean the end of the world for you, but to someone else, they literally mean nothing. Everyone gets spots. Everyone has bad skin days or bad hair days. You're just like the rest of the general human population. This post may not be the kind of help you were looking for, but the only person who can help you with self esteem issues is you. You can only build your confidence day by day, and not let the one, bad day bring you down for good. Buy your stylish clothes. Go to the gym with your friends. The more you hide behind the walls of your house, the more sheltered and fear you'll have of going out and staying out. I guess my main point here is this: you're not the only one. We all struggle with self esteem, some more than others. The best you can do is learn how to cope with it, and the best part is, of you don't like something about you, you can always change it!! If I really didn't want as bad of acne as I have, I could drink water day in and day out and my face would probably be really clear, but I like pop/soda too much :( and if I really wanted a flat stomach, I could go to the gym down the road with my dad, but I'm lazy and rather not. Sorry for the longest answer there ever was. Just remember that 9/10 times, people aren't actually doing the things you think they're doing (judging, scrutinizing, critiquing)~ lacey

[frop]

do all of them you mother fucker

not Once but Twice u have done this to m 

Star Platinum – Your thoughts on the stars? i always did like then when i was younger but now they just make me think of jojo so now i especially like them 

Magician’s Red – Do you know any magic tricks? no but im gonna say what u said and i can bend my fingers waay way farther than most people

Hermit Purple – Show a photo of yourself! I HAVENT taken a selfie in forever i’ll do one later 

Silver Chariot (Requiem) – How much sleep do you need on average? i would love a good 10+ but i only get that much on saturday now boo but on average its like 6-7 

The Fool – Tell us a joke! Is your refrigerator running? Because i’m gonna suck your dick

The World -  A place you want to visit? canada like you would not believe 

Crazy Diamond – What do you treasure the most? hmmmmmmm my friendships with my friends 

The Hand – Do you like your hands? nnnot particularly bc i spent a good portion of my life and still do sometimes where i bit my nails til they bleed so they dont look as nice as i’d like them to be when they grow out 

Echoes – Your favourite sound? The world’s time stop sound, but not jotaro’s version, dio’s specifically

Heaven’s Door – Share a secret! my parents’ divorce has made me scared for the future of my own relationships to the point where i can see myself not ever wanting to be in a relationship ever again bc it would be easier than my partner getting tired of me or hating me. on top of the fact that i’m almost exactly like my father and my mom’s ex fiance in every single emotional department which is what caused their divorce/breakup respectively in the first place and that leads me to believe that in the long run i am Romantically  Unlovable 

Killer Queen – How would you like to die? preferably quick and painless 

Bad Company – What kind of character trades do you dislike? any character that is like ‘waahh wah no one understands me bc i enjoy [’highly advanced’ niche series/book/etc] and they all read [popular series/book/etc] like whatever the fuck his name was in aku no hana, it got so obnoxious i had to drop it lmao 

Red Hot Chili Pepper – Can you handle spicy food? cat’s out of the bag guys im actually a Fake Mexican bc i only like mild stuff and hot chips 

The Lock – Anything you feel guilty about right now? ya but thats for another day 

Love Deluxe – Are you secretly in love with someone right now? its absolutely no secret that i am in love with jonathan joestar 

Pearl Jam – Your signature dish? i can make some mean ass rice apparently 

Achtung Baby – Do you want kids? nnnope no thanks never ever i have my cat and thats enough for me 

Harvest – Do you pick up coins in from the street? no bc u dont know where thats been and money is super dirty already 

Cinderella – Which part of your body do you like the most? dang, i guess my thighs? but lately i’ve been a lot easier on myself abt my stomach and how soft it is 

Atom Heart Father – How is your relationship with your father? pretty good bc we’re really alike in temperament too but sometimes it gets pretty awkward bc he can never see me as anything but his little baby daughter who Never Grows Up

Enigma – What is puzzling you currently? when is davidpro gonna drop the part 5 teaser 

Earth Wind and Fire – What’s the best classical element? i personally have always liked fire 

Stray Cat – Cats or dogs? i love both but man im more suited for cats 

Gold Experience – A precious experience you have not shared with your followers? oh man over this summer my dad his gf and me and my sis when on a trip to her dad’s place in this really small town that was like 3 hours away from our city and it was so nice and quiet and peaceful and i felt so clean and happy there, we were only there for a couple days but ever since i’ve really been wanting to go back

Sticky Fingers – Zippers or buttons? zippers are so much faster but they get caught sometimes so Really, pros and cons of each 

Moody Blues – A song that makes you sad? OOO man i was gonna say epitaph bc Of Course but as i was writing this down melancholy man by moody blues came up on this playlist and now im thinkin abt abba and crying 

Sex Pistols – Have you ever shot a gun or riffle? no im tiny and a weenie and i would probably die from the recoil

Aerosmith – Are you afraid of flights? ive never been on one but i am scared of heights so i cant imagine thats any better 

Purple Haze – What makes you really angry? it used to be not being listened to but now i just let it happen bc Why bother but now its more whenever my mom makes a big deal out of simple mistakes of waiters/waitresses or when shes being obviously racist 

Spice Girl – Your favourite spice? idk what its called but theres this one i like to put on fruit before i eat it to make it Spicy 

King Crimson – Is it possible to predict the future? man idk my mom says yea but who knows 

Black Sabbath – How easily do you trust people? like stupidly easy 

Man in the Mirror – Do you like looking into the mirror? nope lol im ugl. ALSO bc i have a bigger than average fear of reflective stuff in general bc what if i see somethign behind me u kno,,,, 

Beach Boy – Have you ever been fishing? nope! the one time my dad went that i knew abt i was in mexico 

The Grateful Dead – What do you want to be remembered for? honestly, anything else that being the ‘way too nice one’ or the doormat 

White Album – Your favourite CD? aaaaa i dont have one i dont really listen to albums 

Talking Head – Are you a good liar? i guess ? i can keep a pretty straight face but its harder to lie to someone i actually know really well bc they can probably tell what my tics are 

Baby Face – Your thought on babies? theyre cute but i would greatly prefer to never have any 

Metallica – Do you like listening to metal? yea

Green Day – Ideal way to spend a day off? sleep, Sleep, stream with friends and lay in bed

Oasis – Best place for a holiday? hhhhh anyplace that relaxes u tbh 

Stone Free – Are you a indoor or outdoor person? i n d o o r i dont like bugs 

Kiss – Who would you like to kiss or get a kiss from? jonathan joest

Burning Down the House – Ever destroyed something and then regretted it? nah, once again im a weenie and im too worried abt consequences to ever do smth like that

Foo Fighters – Your favourite drink? god damn i fucking love raspberry iced tea 

Diverdown – Your thoughts on diving? the ocean fills me with the fear of god. no thanks 

C-Moon – What would you do for your friend’s sake? put myself in bodly harm 

MadeinHeaven – What do you believe happens after you died? nothing tbh you just end up in a grave or urn or wherever u wanted to be put 

Weather Report – Your favourite weather? man i looove love stormy weather 

Whitesnake – Your thoughts on snakes/reptiles? i love them theyre all gorgeous and beautiful

Tusk – Tea or coffee? coffee

Ball Breaker – Your favourite ball game? to play? its basket ball but to watch baseball 

Oh! Lonesome Me – Do you feel lonely right now? no not right now but im sure it’ll happen soon 

Scary Monsters – Your favourite dinosaur? i love velociraptors and also triceratops !!

Cream Starter – Do you usually wear make up? nope and if i do its only ever lipstick

Catch the Rainbow – Your favourite colour in the rainbow? blue and green!! 

Ticket to Ride – What was the last ticket you bought for? i didnt buy it but the last one i had was for the rogue one like. 2 weeks ago

Dirty Deeds Done Dirt Cheap – Do you believe in the multiverse? i dont think abt it too often but sure

In a Silent Way – Do you enjoy complete silence? yes!! besides some music, i cant concentrate otherwise 

Soft & Wet – Shower or bath? shower bc its easier but i havent taken a bath in forever 

Paisley Park – How good are you with reading maps/directions? Terrible God Awful

Nut King Call – How good are you at assembling/constructing things like Ikea furniture? hmm it depends if i have the manual for it and if i have time to really think on it and im not in a rush or anything

Paper Moon King – Can you do any origami? nope 

King Nothing – Your favourite smell? i really like the smell of cinnamon 

BornThisWay – A strange habit you have? i crack my fingers all the damn time and i like to take off the little plastic circle off of soda bottles and chew on it 

Les Feulies – Your favourite plant? oh damn hmm i like lavenders 

Fun Fun Fun – Something you really enjoy doing? man. i could watch jojo a million times over and i’d never get bored of it 

California King Bed – What size is your bed? currently i sleep in a queen size bc my mom and sis and i share a bed bc we only had one room in our old apartment but now that we moved im sure i’ll be kicked off into a twin soon enough 

JESUS christ ok its almost midnight i hope ur happy you mother fuckre 

[okaybutlikeimagine]

Joyce picking up Billy for fighting in school. And than having to explain to his Dad when they get home. But the only reason Billy gives is ”i was mad.” So frustrated And clueless Hop sends Billy to his room and tells him to stay there until he tells him the real reason for fighting. But Joyce tells Hop they need to work on Billys anger issues. Because she tells him Billy did give him the real reason - he was angry. So they need to work on that. As a family.

YES okay this is so damn valid bc Billy most definitely has anger issues. I feel like we can all agree the poor boy was never taught any constructive ways on how to help w/ his stress and so there are times where the anger and the frustration and all of that emotion just bubbles up inside of him and he breaks. And more significantly, breaks on OTHERS.

(And i was going to include them buying Billy a stress ball but i looked it up and found out that stress balls weren’t invented until ‘88 so jk)(but I’d also like to say that Billy would 100% love and benefit from having a stress ball from the late 80’s bc apparently they were made to be thrown and it would sound like breaking glass so he could throw it against the wall and get the satisfaction of getting his frustration out while also not breaking anything!)(anyway)

When Joyce gets the call from the school, she’s super confused. She almost never gets calls from the school, the only time is when Will is feeling under the weather and seriously has to come home. Other than that, even through bullies and headaches and whatevers else, her boys will stay in school. Even if she tells them they can always call if they need to come home, they’re just not the type to do that.

So getting a call from the school is strange, but when she hears it’s about Billy, her heart hurts a little.

When she gets to the school, Billy is sitting in a little chair in the office absolutely fuming, chest rising and falling fast, eyebrows knitted in tight. Once he gets a look at Joyce though, his expression turns a little sheepish. The principal explains to Joyce that they think Billy needs to go home for the day to calm down and is allowed to return tomorrow “if he feels he’s able to be a respectful young man.”

Billy growls at the words, but keeps his head down. Joyce nods, but her face is disapproving. She doesn’t like the way the principal said that.

She walks with Billy out to her car.

“Sorry for making you come down here on your day off.” Billy says with what he seems to be trying to pass off as a disinterested sniff.

Joyce shakes her head. “It’s fine sweetie. Do you need to talk about anything?”

Billy shakes his head no.

“Are you hurt?”

Billy shakes his head no.

“Did the other kid say anything to you?”

Billy shakes his head no.

Joyce is confused, but lets Billy be. “Alright, well we can talk with your dad about it when he gets home.”

And so Joyce makes them up a couple of sandwiches for lunch and makes him drink a glass of milk and tells him he can hang out in his room if he wants to. She thought she’d have to be strict with him but she can’t find it in her. She can see in his body language that he’s exhausted but still tense. The muscles in his shoulders flex just from sitting and staring at the table. He grabs his glass so hard she’s afraid he’s going to break it. His eyes have been tight and hard and maybe even unseeing since he got home. His muscles keep flexing and unflexing like he’s getting ready to protect himself.

Joyce doesn’t understand it. She never even saw this kind of behavior with Lonnie. Lonnie was more careless than he was tense and frightful. He would lay back and kick his feet up on tables and be quick to irritate. It wasn’t until he got older that he started getting tight like this, and even then he was still too lazy to be this bottled up and clearly struggling.

She lets him sit in his room and play his music out loud. She listens to the familiar sound of weights being dropped on the ground. She sits and wonders what to do. Her boys were never like this. Jonathan gets a little tense sometimes but he’s always been so emotionally mature. He only blows up if it’s something really serious, otherwise he sits still and lets people pick on him. He always has.

When Hop comes home, Joyce tells him what’s happened, and they ask Billy to come out and talk to them about it.

“He really didn’t tell you a reason?” Hop asks, hushed.

“No, he didn’t wanna talk. I didn’t wanna force him.”

Billy walks out, mouth a little twisted up but otherwise looking for all the world like his normal self. But when Hop sets him down and asks “What happened?” neither of them get the answer they’re expecting.

“I beat someone up.”

“Why?”

“Because I was mad.”

… and that’s it. He says it like he would say his eye color or his age. Like it’s a fact. Hop blinks hard and leans forward a little.

“Did he hit you back?”

“No.”

“Did he say something to you?”

“No.”

“Did he do anything at all?”

“I dunno, would you call being in the wrong place at the wrong time doing something, because if you would then yes, he did something.”

And Billy looks and acts defiant, leaning back, legs spread, eyes piercing Hop with a stare that dares him to reprimand him.

“Then why’d you hit him?”

“Because I was mad.”

Billy gives another shrug, seems a little exasperated at having to repeat himself, still daring Hop to do anything at all. Hop huffs and pinches the bridge of his nose.

“Go to your room. And when you come out I want a real answer.”

At that, Billy bristles. Hop doesn’t see it, but Joyce does. He gets defensive, stands up with a shove of his chair back and gives a sneer before walking off to his room and slamming his door with a loud bang.

Joyce feels it in her heart: this is wrong.

She sits where Billy just was.

“Hop… we need to listen to him.”

Hop gives her a disbelieving look, gesturing to Billy’s now shut door.

“I was listening just fine, were you? That wasn’t a real answer!”

“Yes it was.”

“Where was the answer?”

“He was mad. That was the answer.”

Hop scoffs, leaning back and putting his hands over his face. Joyce leans forward to gently pull them away by his wrists.

“I think Billy has a real anger management problem.”

“Well I could have told you that.”

“Okay, well what are you doing to help him?”

Hop doesn’t say anything, just stares at Joyce in confusion.

“Exactly. We need to help him out here.”

Hop is so confused, so lost, so curious as to how this woman who’s known Billy for far less time than Hop has would just know what to do. Then he thinks maybe she doesn’t. Maybe she’s as confused as Hop is but she knows that help is the answer, not frustration and tiredness. Not giving up. They can’t give up.

“Yeah. Fine. You’re right.”

And so they work on it. They help Billy work on himself. Hop tells Billy it’s okay if him being mad is his only answer, but that they need to work on him not getting mad so often.

And so they help him find little hobbies!!! They give him a good, safe space for him to do actual constructive things. Billy’s really good with his hands so he helps Hop out around the house if things ever need to get fixed up. He picks up woodworking and makes little wooden figures around the house. They start off simple and get increasingly more complicated. Hop and Joyce beam when they say that the lovely decoration on their mantle was handmade by their son.

They buy him his own sketchpad and watch happily as Billy sits at the table and sketches and draws stuff out with Will and El. He admits to having always liked drawing as a kid but mumbles about how his dad had told him it was a prissy thing to do. He mostly sketches trees and plants and landscapes. He’s always really loved plants. He tells them that.

So Hop gets him a couple of plants to tend. Steve buys him a little potted plant to keep on his window sill. Billy helps Joyce with the landscaping around their home. Joyce admits that she was always a little jealous of Karen’s flowers in front of her house.

“Mrs. Wheeler’s garden can eat shit. Ours will be better.” Billy says with utter determination and a little dirt on his cheek.

When he gets too stressed and needs to go outside and do something relaxing, he’ll tend to the garden, watering and weeding. Joyce will help if she’s not busy.

And while these help release some stress in general, sometimes school is just too riling, too draining, too emotionally tough that they have to figure something out for him.

But Jonathan figures out what’s going on and tells them he’s got this. And when Billy’s birthday comes around, he opens up a little present from Jonathan and finds a walkman. Jonathan explains that he knows music helps him greatly, any time he’s stressed he puts on music to drown the bad things out, and Jonathan can understand the feeling. He feels the same when he’s upset or nervous. so he figured being able to listen to music in the hallways will be a good way to keep the anger at bay.

Billy nearly cries. He hugs him tight before punching him lightly. Jonathan rubs his arm and mumbles an amused “you’re welcome”

And so Billy is happier! More free! Has more space in himself to do things he loves bc all of that pressure is leaving his system and yeah, he’s still a firecracker and a brat but he’s finding more things to put his mind to! More things to put his energy into! More ways to be constructive!! And when I tell you the rest of the family is so happy for him, MAN it’s an understatement! They’re just so overjoyed at Billy having an easier time being happy♥