I am so in love with this volume because I am so in love with the way Blake Belladonna is finally allowing herself to love Yang, you feel me?
Blake has always had this love fer Yang, we all watched their slowburn unfold over several volumes, but she kept this love close to her heart and only let that affection slip through cracks of her walls and/or during dire life or death situations. The simple, domestic, everyday ways to express love? Holding hands just because and softer words spoken freely and casually? Blake couldn’t do it because she was still afraid.
Afraid to hurt Yang and scare her away with her affections, because she had hurt Yang so much already and couldn’t bear to risk burdening her even more. She had left, she had abandoned the one person who she trusted most, and she had to prove she was staying for good this time. They still had to repair their friendship first and foremost.
Afraid to be the one hurting for exposing herself, because love had burned her once so throughly before. She trusts Yang with her life, but that haunting nightmare that is Adam makes it hard fer her to trust the brightest thing in her life with her heart. Blake had to overcome the bullish knife hanging over her head before she could be in another relationship.
And then when these issues were slowly getting resolved, Blake still held back. Sure, there were more tender moments between them, but they were more brief and far between. Blake was still holding back because this slowburn slowdance was all she knew when it came to Yang. They had to focus on the threat of Salem, of Atlas falling, of all that. It was better to play it safe, now was still not the right time.
But then? But then Blake watched Yang die, and suddenly all those cautious moments of ‘playing it safe’ racked up to an indescribable amount of missed opportunities and regret. Suddenly waiting all this time for the ‘right’ time didnt matter at all anymore because Blake completely ran out of any time.
Blake isn’t going to hold back anymore, she’s finally comfortable enough to be who she always was deep down under those trauma walls, this openly affectionate silly goofy little book nerd who just wants to make her beloved smile, and she’s going to absolutely s h o w e r Yang with flirty tones and dumb jokes and longing touches and be such a dorky romantic because she doesn’t want to waste anymore time. As Weiss spoke fer all of us, it’s, “About time”. The ‘right’ time is right the fuck now screw that ‘not concerned with sands of time’ bullshit she wants to kiss this stupid pretty face and she WILL let Yang know. I think about Blake this volume and I’m just SO PROUD OF HER. Nothing like a little taste of death to push a slowburn along, huh? Seriously though, witnessing Blake’s arc come full circle to open up and be the person she once was before Adam crushed her into taking up as little space as possible, before she deemed herself as nothing but a coward and a fool, seeing her laugh and smile openly and shoot every damn shot she can- it’s so, so damn good.
Anyways, I am also in love with Yang Xiao Long having no idea how to handle Blake being incredibly openly in love with her. 10/10 watching experience, truly.
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I’m reminded of that post about how goths and people who wear only lots of pink are actually the same because “wearing only one color” is a specific choice in opposition to just looking Normal
I’m flying to a friend’s wedding today, and I recently acquired from my neighborhood free page a very pretty vintage suitcase in like a brocade upholstery texture in all of my good colors, so of course I needed a coordinated airport outfit à la Midge Maisel. You guys don’t know me, but I usually dress very put together, in what my sister calls Outfits, with a capital O to distinguish it from just wearing clothes. And since getting a full time job I’ve been slowly adding to my collection of vintage and 50’s-vibes clothes, because I just really like that aesthetic (my bridesmaid dress for the wedding is a vintage tea dress I got from Etsy. The fabric is in great condition but I had to reinforce pretty much every seam with my sewing machine, because the structural integrity of the original thread was breaking down, so that was an interesting learning experience).
All of which is to say that I Dressed Up for the airport in a vintage-y outfit that coordinates perfectly with some of the colors of my suitcase, and my hair is curled, and I have a vintage leather purse that my grandma gave me that matches her watch that I’m wearing and the shoes she bought me last summer at the same vintage store that my skirt came from, and a teenage-ish girl with whatever you call the 2023 teenage equivalent of emo/punk vibes, like the dark maroon mullet and not a lot of makeup and dark comfy clothes but like, very on purpose, told me I look cool when I walked past on the way to security
And like, she Gets It! We have different fashion goals but I think we put a similar degree of intention into the way we look compared to just wearing regular clothes. Which is cool! It’s validating. Not that I really need validation, but it’s always nice to get compliments, of course. And the way I dress is really not terribly distinctive most of the time, other than being Outfits and a little dressier than maybe the norm is, like I think most people who see me one time in passing would see that I look Nice but not necessarily see it as a cultivated Look. But punk mullet girl gets it.
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