#slowly giving up the chance of ever finding anywhere tbh

[julians-muscles-and-tits]

Hey there!! I can never find any good Julian x reader fics and was hoping to share an idea with you when I found your blog!!

Reader grew up with the boys and her and Julian are sorta friends with benefits type thing but she wants more. So when Julian starts dating Candy she pulls away and tells him she’s done. Then when he and candy break up, he comes to her trailer and she’s kind to him but when he makes a move she tells him again that she’s done. She can’t keep pretending she’s not in love with him and has to stop imagining what their future would look like together.

After this she distances herself from him until he cannot take it anymore and realizes how in love with her he is, he grovels to try and get her back before she gives him one final chance and they end up back together.

With smut if you want, I really like your writing!!!

Hi mate sorry it took me so long to reply been working on this fic for a few days I really liked your ideas tbh, also thankyou sm for saying you like my writing you've made my day saying that 😊🙏.

You'd grown up in Sunnyvale trailer park, you knew everyone and were friends them, you were very familiar with how things worked there and it was a place you were proud to call home. Your best friends were Ricky, Bubbles and Julian out of the trio the one you were closest to and the most familiar with was Julian, you were aware with who he was as a person and his habits, his frequent visits to jail, his get rich quick schemes that never went anywhere, the way he almost played a part in the general dysfunction and chaos of the park itself, you knew deep down despite all the disasters he was a good man who despite his tough indomitable bravado was secretly battling abandonment of an abusive parent, childhood trauma, depression and anxiety issues that nobody would have ever suspected because he was that good at putting on the “King of the park” appearance, if there was ever a problem residents went to Julian, Julian was protective and powerful he was someone you could rely on in a tough spot resilience and innovation were some of his best qualities. You sometimes wondered how he coped with so much stress but he did.

You two have had an on/off thing for years you've always been friends with benefits or “friends with the benedicts” as Ricky would call it, he's an incredible lover and is romantic and kind in his gestures, you've always wanted your relationship to evolve into something more real, more special but it's never gone past that point, Julian has abandonment issues and struggles with his feelings and emotions you knew that, then when he started dating Candy who you yourself had spoken to a couple of times who seemed nice for the most part you broke of the thing between you two and he agreed as he wanted to be with her.

One warm summer day when you were washing dishes in your kitchen sink Julian came around, he looked devastated and seemed very down in himself he told you that Candy had broke up with him he didn't go into too many details as he was so upset but was trying to pretend he wasn't, he told you she'd said it was to do with his criminal lifestyle, his surroundings and his friends Candy had said it could never work because Julian would never change or improve his quality of life. He's sat on your couch slowly drinking his rum and coke staring at the TV show you have on with a thousand yard stare, Julian disassociates from time to time this is his brain's response to extreme stress or any mental anguish but also something you'd suspected he'd done as a child to cope with how horrific his father was to him. You sit down next to him watching him rolling his empty tumbler glass in between his hands.

“Are you OK Julian?” You ask kindly he looks over at you and his heart swells up, you're so kind and caring to him its more than he can take and not what's he used to.

“Yeah I'm good” he lies quietly staring down at the glass trying his best to choke back his tears.

“I'm so sorry about you and Candy,” you say sympathetically as you hug him feeling enveloped by his big strong arms, they're your weakness because his arms provide you with feelings of security and comfort you never knew you needed. “It's going to be OK you'll get through this, it's her loss Julian” you hear him let out what sounds like a small shaky sob on your shoulder and you reassuringly stroke his wide solid back your hand feels so small on it, you suddenly feel the wisps of his facial hair and lips against your neck he begins to slowly pepper you with kisses and you feel yourself melt as he reaches your lips and tenderly kisses them, his black goatee feels scratchy and delightful against your face his hands travel up your back and he gently pulls you close, you feel weak and can't help but kiss back, he's such a strong man but is so tender and warm. You pull away from the kiss, you can't get sucked into this again, you have to be strong, you told yourself when he got with Candy that was it and you two were done for good even if they didn't work out. You slowly stand up from the couch looking down at him as he's staring up at you with confused doting blue eyes.

“Julian, I'm sorry but I can't do this with you again. We can't ever get back together, there's just too many reasons why it wouldn't work” you whisper feeling terrible that you're having to turn away the already emotionally vulnerable and wounded man sat on your couch. Julian sighs looking even more defeated and melancholy as he stands up.

“I understand” Julian replies politely.

“It's not-”

“You don't have to explain anything to me I get it, I shouldn't have made a move on you it was wrong and I'm gonna go but I appreciate you being there for me” Julian says calmly.

“I'm always here if you want to talk” you say warmly and he replies with a thanks and a small smile appears on his face as he picks up his empty tumbler glass and slowly walks out of the trailer, when he leaves you let out a deep sigh and close your eyes you feel the nagging pang of guilt and conflicting feelings but you brush them off and go back to washing dishes.

Weeks pass by since you've seen Julian and its been constant mental gymnastics in your mind of going back and forth weighing up the pros and cons of being with him, your head is a jumbled mess and you feel like you can't think straight. You've been telling yourself to stop imagining what your future would look like, how you would plan your wedding, if he ever wanted kids or not, that you don't love him and he doesn't love you, that you two have never had a real relationship, that he's a middle aged criminal with a slight drink problem and a penchant for shoplifting and crime, he's the kind of man some mothers would warn their daughters to stay away from, but there's something about him that makes you feel euphoric and makes you glow inside when you see him he's that enchanting and enigmatic but you tell yourself it doesn't matter because he doesn't love you. You wrestle with these thoughts as you try to go about your day to day life hoping they'll fade and that these feelings will dissipate but they don't they remain there strongly.

One unfortunate day there's a problem with the boiler in your trailer and you've had no luck getting in touch with Randy, you find yourself in a pickle about what to do as you need a shower, Bubbles has no hot water in his shed, Ricky is back to sleeping in his car and therefore has the same problem the only person you know in Sunnyvale who'd let you use their shower is Julian. You feel awful having to ask considering you've been avoiding him for some time and you expect him to be cold and dismissive when you turn up on his doorstep to ask if you can use his shower but he's not he's polite and welcoming.

You stand under the running shower head indulging yourself in the warm water trickling down your face, back and chest. When you're done you get out, dry yourself off and you put your clothes back on with mildly damp hair, you spot something in his bedroom, a pair of black diamanté sparkling high heeled shoes that when he took you out on the only date you've ever been on these shoes caught your eye in a shop window and you pointed them out to him telling him how much you liked them, they still have the security tag on them so they were stolen but you feel overjoyed that he remembered a small comment you made about a pair of shoes you wanted and this was 8 months ago, you're hit with the realisation that your feelings of doubt regarding his love for you are wrong and it shows that he knows you so well, he saw how your face lit up when you pointed to these shoes, how he knows you have a love for sparkly shiny things he'd been waiting for the right time to give them to you as a gift but he's been respecting your boundaries and giving you space, you try not to get too caught up in thinking about this as you go into his kitchen where he's boiling pasta on his stove and he looks over at you and how beautiful you look with your damp hair, the shoes are still on your mind and you can't help but smile, he's got butterflies and his heart is fluttering as you slowly walk over to him trying your best to act casual looking at the steamy boiling pot, he turns off the stove and he can't take it anymore, this is the first time he's seen you in so long it's been too long it feels like a century to him. He hugs you and you find yourself wrapped in his embrace again, feeling protected, his warmth, his pleasant cologne you drink it all in and this time any self discipline you had has long gone out of the window.

“(Y/N) please can we give it another shot? I promise I'll try to make it work, I'll do better, please I love you so much these weeks I haven't seen you have been fucking killing me” Julian confesses raspily, feeling himself unravelling as a warm blissful feeling spreads in his chest and throughout his body. You both kiss, his lips locked on to yours, its a kiss of passion, of love, you've missed feeling his beard scratch and brush your lips and face, feeling his strong nose against your cheek, you don't know why you've been denying yourself him for this long when he is everything you’ve wanted and more.

“I know, I know baby I love you too I just..sigh I just kept telling myself that it wasn't meant to be, but I know we can make it work somehow” you say muffled against his lips.

You're both kissing in a frenzied state stumbling into his bedroom, you're walking backwards and he's walking forwards you're both distracted and addicted to each other's lips and tongues, you remove your clothes he removes his black tshirt revealing his buff chest and its enough to make your knees weaken and your loins burn from the sheer beautiful sight, you fling your bra into the corner and he marvels at the sight of your breasts making his stiff cock twinge, his eyes are locked on to you like he wants to devour you entirely and you'd be only to happy to let him. He removes his light blue jeans and boxers and his thick cock is jutting up hard and ready just for you, you remove your trousers and panties you're both completely naked.

He sits near the edge of the bed his muscly thighs spread apart palming his dick and you climb to where he's sat shuffle over and mount him your wet hot cunt swallowing his cock in such a delicious way that he can't help but close his eyes and let out a helpless satisfied grunt, a smile curls up on his lips remembering how tight and exquisite you feel around him, you've also forgotten how good it feels to have him inside you.

You let out a whimper, he's thickly stretching you out and is so far up inside you that it feels like a pleasurable ache, you look down at him as he kisses your boobs and his goatee tickles your areola making you giggle, you begin sensually moving yourself up and down, riding him in a slow teasing manner, taking your time the way you like it and the way you know he loves it.

He slowly slides his tongue over your sensitive hard nipples and his muscles are wrapped around you his hands grabbing on to your waist to encourage you everytime you rock back and forth so he can feel your walls contract and feel that divine moist tightness around his sensitive cock even more. You kiss him lovingly he has one hand on the small of your back and one hand on your arse, as you grind more and more he simply can't resist the manly urge to slap your left arse cheek just to hear the loud clap noise and make you loudly moan out, you go even faster your boobs smothering his face, feeling him hit that sweet spot inside that's making you mewl and moan in ecstasy, your favorite thing is to slam your hips down with full force each time you glide yourself up on his length so you can see and hear the stoic burly man melt underneath you, you love how it drives him wild and the fact that he's so strong and so masculine is simply delicious watching him weaken, moan and whimper underneath you while you sweetly hold him close your hands in his moist black hair. He's looking up at you with infatuated lustful eyes as every thud and slam of your hips is heavenly and it's sending him to another dimension, the way he's vertically rubbing up against your inner walls is orgasmic, you feel full like him being inside you is something that feels so wonderful and natural you can't imagine not feeling him in you, like a key that fits into a lock. Julian's hand grips tighter on the flesh of your hips and you know and can tell from the way his grip has tightened and his thigh muscles are seizing up that means he's close to coming.

“Mm, uh, ohh, fuck i love you so much,” his voice cracks as his face is pressed into your skin his cock throbbing with the sweet promise of relief, his groin muscles tensing violently, his eyes screw up and you feel his warm breath on your tits as he pants on you while your pussy pulls at his cock like its inviting him to come inside you as you milk him completely he lets out a muffled “ohhh” on your chest and roughly squeezes your skin but not so much that it hurts, he holds his strength back even when he's at the peak of orgasm because you're smaller than him and he doesn't want to hurt you he's such a gentleman like that. He lets out what sounds like a shuddery sob and remains frozen as he lets his breathing get back to normal and tries to gather his strength. You feel proud you did that to him, you gave him such romance and love that's he's never known before. You climb off him and he winces at the loss of contact but also because he's sore, you kiss him gently as he's orgasm drunk but slowly feeling himself coming back down to earth, you go to the bathroom to deal with the sticky mess between your legs when you’re done you notice he's in the kitchen refilling his glass of rum and coke, you smile and shake your head, typical Julian, but you love him so much.

#nsfw #romance #Julian #trailer park boys #x reader #OC #smut #love #kissing #hugging #feelings #fem fic #tpb Julian #fan fic #break up #season 12 #self ship #tpb self ship #tumblr ask box #Julian x reader #reader fic

[ace-malarky]

I meant to sit around and answer tags tonight except I got distracted and anyway I also p much preordered Samantha Shannon’s new book again because I forgot I did that already and it’s weird that Waterstones doesn’t like. it doesn’t say. on your orders page. What they are. like I have to click on them to see the titles of the books bc none of them have covers yet and wouldn’t it be easier just to have the titles there?

 Anyway I caught that one and may have preordered something else instead and no I don’t have space on my shelves or in my flat or whatever, but that’s a future Ace problem

[moemammon]

Could I request HC of MC falling asleep on the brothers and someone asks them to do something but they don’t want to move bc of MC🥺 kinda like how it’s illegal to move if an animal is asleep on you🥺💕 thank you!

I'm soft for stuff like this tbh

The Demon Brothers react to GN!MC falling asleep on them

Lucifer

Lucifer has found that he works best when you're near him. Something about your presence calms his old soul. So it's become a habit that he has you near while he's going through paperwork, always touching you in some fashion.

Today, you were resting your head against his shoulder in the late afternoon, the warmth of his body and the sound of his pen scribbling on paper lulling you into a sense of peace and sleepiness.

He looked over after noticing the added weight against his side, and found you'd drifted off to sleep. And man.... this man realizes just how soft he is for you. Like, can you BE any cuter??? You're gonna kill him.

He feels a warmth swell up in his chest, not only from his affection for you, he the way you seem so peaceful sleeping against him like that. The fact that you feel secure with him, while others only seem to fear him, makes his heart fill to the brim.

But now he can't move, or you'll wake up. And to make matters worse, he just heard a loud ass crash in the hall right outside, and the sound of Mammon cursing under his breath. MAMMOOONNNNN-

As much as it pains him, he doesn't have the strength to get up while you look so content and secure sleeping against him like this. Besides, he can always kill punish Mammon later. He’d just text Beel to string him up from the ceiling until then.

Mammon

It's not unusual for the two of you to chill on the couch together, and he doesn't even care that you're all over him. Actually, he's probably the one that pulled you into such a position.

You're laying on his chest, and he's got his arms around you while he plays around on his phone. And that's when he notices the tiniest of snores coming from you. He looks down and sees that you've fallen asleep.

FUCK does that make him wanna scream. His heart is so full of love that he's literally trembling. You were so.. sO CUTE. IT SHOULD BE ILLEGAL. HE LOVES YOU, DAMN IT.

But then he gets a text from Lucifer, asking him to go back to RAD to fetch some documents. Why'd he have to be his errand boy all the time? Why not Satan??

Mammon is no stranger to Lucifer's wrath though, so now he has a strong need to get you off of him, yet an equally strong need to hold you close.

Especially when you mumble something that sounded vaguely like his name in your sleep. Maybe... it’d be fine to let you rest a little longer? It's not like those lousy papers were going anywhere, right?

Levi

You????? Felt comfortable enough to sleep on him?????? In the middle of a movie he put on????

There's practically steam coming out of his ears. He's short circuiting. He's going to die and it's all your fault. WHY ARE YOU SO CUTE YOURE JUST SLEEPING ON HIS ARM AND YET THE MOE IS TOO STRONG-

Seriously though, he's so red up to his ears that you'd think he might die. The only thing that keeps him from death is that you aren't awake to look at him. He was safe!

But then a notification pops up on his D.D.D, and he suddenly remembers he’s got a tournament to compete in with a couple of online friends! He promised them!!!

Maybe... he'll wake you up? No no no, he'd really die if that happened! You can't wake up yet!! But the game-! The dungeon run-!! The loot!!! What can he do?! There's no way he can ruin this 'straight-out-of-an-anime' moment!!!

Levi's never been one to miss a chance to game, so why was he so conflicted?! Now he was thinking that maybe he could just reschedule the match? Besides, when was the next time he might get to see your sleeping face so close to his own? He wonders if he could sneak in a picture or two...

Satan

Satan's entire room, albeit cluttered, has a cozy vibe. Just the way he likes, as a man who prefers to keep calm and indulge in the wonders of books. And he's invited you over to indulge with him, per usual

Though he'll admit it IS a little late, so he understands that you're sleepy. It doesn't even surprise him when you slump against his arm from your position next to him, the book on your lap sliding to the ground.

As much as it pains him to see the book fall like that, he quickly realizes he can't bend down to grab it, or you'll wake up.

And he hasn't had a chance to really look closely at your sleeping expression, so he has to get his priorities in order. He could get that boom later, anyway.

He laughs at you, and how easily you've fallen asleep. Why didn't you just tell him you were tired? He’d walk you back to your room so you could sleep. Yet you wanted to spend time with him so badly that you pushed through?

He closes his book and leans his head against yours with a soft sigh. Peaceful days like this were all he could ever ask for. He wished he had a spell to preserve this moment forever.

Asmo

Helloooo? Are you even listening anymore?? He was in the middle of telling you about the time Beel ate his entire collection of bath bombs, and you fell asleep right on his lap!

Probably because he was making you lay there while he dabbed products onto your face. "This one is a great toner. Doesn't it smell good? And this moisturizer here is sooo creamy!"

He can't help but notice how peaceful you look laying there, fast asleep. He could just eat you up! Catch him leaning in to kiss you a million times, wondering if you'll wake up.

He's gotta put that kissing on hold when he realizes he has a photo shoot to get to in an hour! He'd need every single minute to get himself ready of course, so he needed to start now. The only problem was... you. On his lap.

He can't get up or he’d be cruelly abandoning his precious MC! And there was no way he’d be that heartless. But that photo shoot was pretty important... How else would he give the devildom its dose of his gorgeous face???

Cue Satan coming in and finding Asmo doing his skin care on his bed, straining to see his reflection in the far away vanity mirror... all so he wouldn't disturb a hair on your adorable little head.

Beel

Beel had asked if you'd lay on his back for extra weight while he did his planks, but he never expected you to fall asleep there. Belphie does the same thing sometimes, so he's no stranger to having to stay still for someone else's sake.

The warmth of your form draped over his back makes him smile, and he wonders if you're cozy laying like that. Wasn't his back kind of hard?

He was fine with waiting until you woke up, since being stuck in a plank for an unknown amount of time would be a great workout, what wasn't so great was the gnawing of hunger slowly starting to creep up on him.

Beel was hungry. Starving, even. And he was stuck because you fell asleep on him. He tried muttering a soft "MC, wake up" as a means to gently wake you, but when you didn't budge, he wondered if he might die like this.

The longer he waited, the more his hunger built. It was five minutes. Ten minutes. Twenty, and then- he lost it.

You wake up to being suddenly dumped onto the cold floor, and you only catch a glimpse of the avatar of gluttony rushing off to empty the fridge of its contents.

He'll apologize when he's full, okay? He promises he loves you, but his hunger is no joke. Promises to treat you to Madam Scream's later as an apology.

Belphie

Not unexpected that you'd fall asleep while in Belphie's care. He had a knack for that sort of thing, bringing the air around him to a sleepy halt and making your eyes heavy with that smooth voice of his.

You were listening to him talk about the old days, when he and Beel would sneak away from their brothers to have their own adventures. Then the next thing you knew, you were drifting off to sleep.

Belphie immediately noticed when your head leaned against his hand; he’d been toying around with your hair and occasionally stroking your cheeks. This was one of those moments he didn't feel like bullying you, after all.

But now he kind of does. You were so innocent, and so vulnerable right now! He could tickle you awake at any moment and you wouldn't be able to stop him at all... Though he doesn't.

He instead looks up when the door opens and Beel pops into the bedroom to ask if Belphie can help him find his jacket. There's no way he’d deny his brother, sooo sorry mc. He hesitates for two seconds, but he's leaving you.

Belphie is a sleep expert, and that includes his mastery of the art of not waking people up, so somehow he's managed to carefully maneuver around you so you're still fast asleep.

Leaves you with a little kiss and tucks you into his bed. He'll come tickle you to death later 💕

[opluffys]

Surprise! - Killer x Reader

school is fucking hard. i don’t like how this turned out tbh but this is for my one piece people :) . thank you for being so patient, i appreciate it. like all the other fics here, this was posted to my archive account too, luffys. sorry i’m too lazy to find a gif, forgive me ;( . pls let me know if it copied weird/if there are errors, sometimes that happens. pls enjoy!!

-smut/nsfw-

Wrapped thinly in the cool sheets, your legs spread wide while your agile fingers dipped into your soaked folds. Eyes closed, mouth agape, practically screaming.

Not a care in the world who could hear you, not a single care if that rickety door creaked open and suddenly, you were hosting a show.

Not a single care when someone had walked in.

One of your glossy eyes popped open, in shock, and hidden arousal. When you had seen who it was, you only smiled and continued your ministrations.

"Surprise." You grinned, slipping two fingers deep inside of yourself, mewling at the feeling.

He stayed silent, large figure obscuring the flood of bright stars that painted the night sky. You could just hardly tell, but you knew he was looking at you. His head just barely turned in your general direction.

"You're not supposed to be here."

You laughed, "Yes, I'm aware."

"You belong to the surgeons crew."

"Are you going to tell on me? Summon red hair to see the horrible things I'm doing?" You gasped, faking a worried tone.

"You couldn't go to someone else's room?" He asked, shutting the door quite harshly, you tightened your legs.

"I don't know this ship. This happened by chance." You paused, looking him over. He is a very attractive man, and that uniform he has on is doing him nothing but justice.

"How about you enjoy yourself a little, before your captain gets you killed." You spread yourself for him, whining at the cool air.

He laughed.

It was a very distinct sound, but you honestly could care less. You've heard many laughs in your lifetime. One shouldn't be judged for the sound they make out of joy.

"Nervous?" You teased, rubbing yourself slowly.

"Not at all."

"Liar."

He approached you slowly, like an animal hunting prey. Holding your soft thighs with scarred skin, subconsciously, you moved closer. His thick fingers coated with your arousal, he pushed into your tight walls. You squeezed your legs tightly, not wanting just his fingers.

"You can barely handle two fingers. Yet, you're begging for me." He chuckled quietly.

Moaning when he curled his fingers inside of you, you nearly came right there.

"Fine, since you want it so bad..." He mumbled, you looked up at him, then the leather pants of the outfit. You nearly drooled when you noticed the print of his erection. You imagined a thousand different ways of how he could fuck you.

He noticed you looking, and started palming at it, making you grow impatient. Just to get you really riled up, he would deeply groan or sigh.

You sat up, trying to get him to pay attention to you, just to result him in pushing you back down. You huffed. "No doll. I'm calling the shots here, in case you haven't figured that out yet."

Agonisingly slow, he lowered the material of his garments, basically becoming a striptease.

Your breathing quickened, you hadn't been so excited in so damn long. Your body yearned for his hands anywhere on you.

Pressing his tip to your anxious folds, he slowly stretched you open, inch by inch. You whimpered at the feeling, you're not sure you've ever slept with anyone of this size before.

"Relax. I can't fit if you're squeezing me the entire damn time." He groaned almost silently, he was right, but it felt so good, you couldn't control yourself.

The problem wasn't with how aroused you were, no. You were soaking wet, pretty much leaking over his cock. It was his fucking size, he was so big. You wouldn't tell him, though. Screw his ego.

With a few deep breaths, you relaxed your body, lightly spasming on his length as he tried to push himself deeper within you.

Screaming out in pure pleasure, you finally felt him bottom out. You were crying, it was a little painful, but it hurt so good.

"Fuck, you're good."

You nearly purred in response, happy to hear such a thing come from someone like him. You knew he was just talking about how your pussy feels, but it's still apart of you, no?

He pulled out of you slowly after thrusting his hips a couple of times, not interested in this kind of position. It was boring, the only good thing is he could see the way your face contorts into bliss when he stretches your tight cunt, as well as your soft breasts bounce gently with every single move he made.

He helped you to sit up, and flip over so your stomach was touching the bed. You arched your back when you felt his calloused hands tracing blemishes on your smooth skin.

"Look how soft you are..." He had almost growled in want,  "That soft skin of yours won't last a day with me, girl."

"Prove it."

That shit grin on your face dissipated instantly when you felt his harsh grip on your hips yank you closer to him. His large hands groping and squeezing the curve of your ass. Whimpering in want, you backed your hips behind you, a silent sign that you wanted more of him.

"Impatient."

You grinned, "I'm not the only one." You felt his length behind you, slowly pushing in. You hummed, your body finally feeling contented bliss.

Your soft and slick walls fluttered around his cock with every swift movement, screaming in pleasure as he hit all the right places inside you.

"You're amazing, you're so fucking amazing..!" You gasped, insides grabbing him in a vice grip. He groaned lowly, he was seeing stars fucking into you. Watching your small body eat him up greedily while you begged for more, fuck...

Picking up the pace, your cries were muffled by the comforter below you. He was fucking you deep into the mattress, and hell, you wouldn't dare complain. It felt fucking phenomenal, being bent in such a way you thought you couldn't achieve. His strong arms on each side of you, watching the muscles flex with every thrust.

You tried to quiet yourself down so you could try to hear him, he was so damn silent, you had to question yourself if you were any good for him.

"You're pretty quiet." You whimpered, feeling him waver for a moment, stopping while still comfortably inside your warmth.

"Want me to scream like you, babe?"

You giggled, "Maybe. Would be nice to know if I'm making you feel any good back there..."

"You being alive up to this point is an affirmation of that, isn't it?" He asked, bringing you up to straddle him.

"I can say the same to you. Just because I'm smaller than you doesn't mean you're stronger."

He smiled, unbeknownst to you, of course. "Is that so..?"

"It is. You made a mistake by switching positions, see," You placed your hands on his broad, muscular shoulders. "now I'm in control. I have you in the palm of my fucking hand, babe." You smiled, teasing his earlier pet name.

Raising your hips to slowly lower yourself onto him, his grip on the bedsheets tightened, he was reacting even more than you were!

"Look at you, such an untamed, wild thing. Sitting calmly under a woman's touch- a woman's body. I caged you, albeit temporarily." You heard him snarl deeply, unable to speak while you rode him slowly.

"Imagine if Eustass saw you like this, crying under me," his hand trailed slowly to your waist, bruising in the grip it held. Your smeared lipstick followed the curve of your lips as best as it could, "Angry? Don't be, it's just you and I. I'm yours, yet loyal to one man." Your hands snaked to his back, nails sinking into the muscle.

"Imagine if Trafalgar saw you like this, sleeping with the enemy." He chuckled, "Think twice about how you want to talk to the second in command, doll." Easily overpowering you, he began to move your body up and down as he liked, sliding you over his cock. You couldn't even fight him on it, the pleasure too much for you to even think logically.

"Ohh, oh fuck. You're gonna kill me. You're gonna fucking kill me..." You moaned, leaning closer to him as he assisted your ride. "Hey," he slowed down for a second, still pumping into you every so often, "kiss m-me..." you whimpered, hot tears pouring over your smooth skin.

"I won't look. I promise." You placed your hands on his shoulders delicately, grinning devilishly when you noticed him flinch.

"Please..?" You smiled warmly at him, giving him such an odd feeling, how could he say no?

"If you look, I won't hesitate to slice you in two. Understand?" He threatened, his voice dropping to a darker tone. Subconsciously, it made you squeeze around him tighter, feeling a new high behind the threat. He felt this, of course, shaking his head a bit.

You closed your eyes, feeling his warm lips barely connect with yours, the both of you pushing closer to close that nonexistent gap in between you. His taste drove you feral, nearly growling and making other animalistic sounds while pathetically bouncing on him.

You wanted to see him, desperately, fucking badly. But you made a promise.

And pirates don't make promises.

"You're fucking hot..." You mumbled, not completely on accident, you haven't even noticed, immediately regretting your decision when you noticed the shift of mood.

His grasp shifted from your waist and hips, to tightly around your neck.

Gasping and struggling for air, you wrapped your legs as tightly as you could around him, it hurt like hell for you, but it obviously restricted his breathing as well. Just barely, though...

"I'm s...sorry." You whispered, voice sounding unfamiliar to even you.

The grip on your throat loosened, just enough for you to inhale the cool air into your burning lungs. The muscles and tendons of your thighs and calves were burning, sighing contently when you released him.

"I know you're angry,"

"Angry?" He chuckled, his blonde lashes falling delicately over the tanned skin of his cheek, "Angry doesn't begin to describe it, babe." He growled, squeezing your hips hard.

"but," A wolfish grin spread onto your lips, looking up at him with lust burning in your irises, "what kind of pirate would I be if I kept my promises..?"

"I should use you as a shield in Onigashima."

You laughed, wrapping your arms around his wide stature, "Sure, if that's what you really want. But tell me, how many have seen your face and lived through it? Maybe think about keeping me around for a little while longer. Pretty please?" You teased, resting your cheek against his pectoral muscle.

He grimaced, you had a point. He hadn't remembered the last time he's had such an intimate partner like you.

"Fine."

"Fine?" You questioned, not moving from your surprisingly comfortable spot on his muscled thighs.

"After we're done here, you go back to Trafalgar."

You frowned, that isn't what you had expected him to say at all.

"Relax, it isn't like we won't cross paths in the future." He rocked his hips into your own gently, making you softly gasp and moan into his chest.

After the two of you decided that talking time was over, he quickly pushed you onto the mattress once again, your ass in the air while your shaky legs barely held you.

His grip on the supple and soft skin of your hips was painfully bruising, which only added to the pleasure he provided.

You placed your hands behind your back in offering of him holding onto those instead, he grabbed them instantly, gripping your wrists to anchor himself to you.

Hot tears pricked your eyes once more when you felt him snug against your cervix, cursing the barrier that prevented him from going on further. He didn't mind, though. He enjoyed what he could fit into you just fine.

Panting and groaning deeply, he was much more audible with the mask off. He was entranced by the way your cunt took him in, your juices coating more and more of his dick every time he slammed back into you.

Even though you really couldn't take all of him, your soaking warmth wanted nothing more than to feel his imprint deep inside of you. He didn't want to harm you though, so he pushed in just what you could handle.

He watched as your ass jiggled with every thrust, his calloused and large hand groping and kneading the soft flesh.

You whimpered under him, feeling your velvety walls squish his cock as tightly as humanly possible, you lost count of how many times you had orgasmed, each one more powerful than the last.

Your spine curved to the point it was uncomfortable, face buried in the scratchy material of the sheets, your toes curled, hands turning a burning white around Killer's large hand, you screamed, moaned, groaned, pretty much every sound imaginable as your orgasmed ripped through you once again.

He was surprised at the sheer force of your orgasm, groaning as he felt his cock twitch from deep within your slick heat.

You whimpered and babbled incoherent words at the feeling of overstimulation burning your nerves. Your pussy still squeezing and convulsing around his hard cock.

He cursed deeply under his breath, your tight warmth sucking him back in protest of feeling him pull out.

He too felt his release sneaking from behind, just a small push and he'd be diving into that ocean of pleasure.

You spurred him on with words of praise, mumbling how good he felt, gasping at how he stretched and filled you perfectly.

His hips stuttered, dick twitching deep inside as his hard muscles made contact with your softer back. He groaned deeply as he pushed himself inside once more as deeply as possible, dragging his cock against your walls as he marked you with his release.

Feeling your abused hole get stuffed full of his cum pushed you over the edge, just the feeling of being deliciously full made you convulse under him again, squealing in a mixture of pleasure and pain.

He pulled out of you agonizingly slow, making you whimper with a hidden need of wanting to be pinned under him again. He hovered over you a moment, fighting that exact same urge while watching your pussy leak his seed. He smiled to himself, knowing deep down that no other man could make you feel as he did.

He pushed two digits inside your sore cunt, stopping the flow of his cum onto your spread thighs. You made a sound, even unknown to you what it was, you knew you just couldn't take it anymore.

He pulled his fingers out, digits glistening of your juices mixed with his own. He brought them to your agape mouth, humming to himself as you wrapped your swollen lips around his fingers. Sucking them clean with a smile while attempting to tease him while circling your tongue over his fingers.

He lay next to your drained body, a thin sheet of sweat covering the two of you. Pulling you to his chest, you smiled while laying next to him.

Looks like he'd keep you around for a while.

[sailors-diary-for-elise]

Reaching Out

SEE! SOMETHING OTHER THAN SMUT. Also this one is old and a bit dusty, sooooo warnings are gonna be to the best of my ability. ALSO. THIS IS ANGST AND HAS TRIGGERING THEMES. PLEASE SCROLL PAST IF THE WARNINGS ARE DISTRESSING TO YOU. I wrote this during a really difficult day and was just word vomiting tbh. I am also gonna state that this is a work of fiction and I am in no way a therapist or anything, so if something here bothers you I’m sorry this is just something I wrote mostly for myself.

Warnings: god this is painful but here we go. Reader is depressed and has anxiety, mentions of self-inflicted injuries (she punches a mirror...repeatedly-), blood, panic attacks, it takes a few of the members to restrain the reader so if you’re uncomfortable with that please don’t read this, this is honestly just a hard read imo so please read with care. Also, the reader hates herself and just doesn’t really think highly of herself at all sooooo yeah-

It was the fourth time this month. The fourth argument that could’ve and should’ve ended differently.

You’d come out of your room to find San off at practice or on some work related schedule, spend the entire day outside trying to break a horrible cycle in your mind, just to disappear again once he returned home. It was frustrating you both and causing a serious strain in your relationship.

On San’s side, he couldn’t understand why it was that you would fight against him trying to get you to come out of your room when you spent the entire day alone. Then there was his frustration when you would complain about never seeing him and yet would disappear and avoid him when he was available. To San, it didn’t make any sense. All he wanted to do was spend time with you and support you, but it seemed as though you were determined to shut him out. He watches you storm off to your bedroom, running a hand through his hair as he tries to recall the last time he’d come back from a schedule and had a nice quiet evening that didn’t end in you both screaming at each other. When he can’t, San grabs his jacket and walks out of the apartment with his phone and keys, planning on spending the night at the dorms so that you can have some space to cool off. Once he gets in his car, he quickly dials Hongjoong’s number, pulling out of the parking garage of your complex and letting out all of his frustrations and concerns. 

As he drove, San had no way of knowing how much you hated yourself for what was happening between you both.

What San didn’t know was that your depression and anxiety had been spiraling lately due to the pressure that had been placed on your shoulders from not only your work but from being the girlfriend of an idol that had become so famous. He didn’t know that every day you were terrified that, now that his future was so bright and secure, he’d no longer want you. That he’d leave you just like so many before had done, and that he’d realize you were no longer something of use to him. And finally, how you criticize every minute of your life, finding ways that you are failing even when you’ve done nothing but your best. It came to the point that waking up from dreams was physically painful, because you could control a dream and guarantee the people you love never turned their backs on you. San didn’t, or rather, couldn’t know this. Because to know this would mean you would have to tell him. And no one should have to bear this burden but you, and there was always that small part of you that was terrified of having your feelings invalidated. 

Your whole life people have toyed with you, accepting your depression only when it was convenient to them and berating you once the curtains fall. Some even went as far as to weaponize your emotions, tearing you down in an argument with something that was the equivalent to the beating heart in your chest. Yes they would apologize and you would eventually forgive them because people make mistakes. But the thing about words is that once they leave someone’s mouth, the damage is already done and there’s no amount of remorse or forgiveness that can repair it. That’s where you are now.

You slam the door shut, leaving all the lights in your room turned off, your head pounding after the screaming match you and San had just finished (rather, you ran out on and barricaded the door so he wouldn’t see you cry) and your face stained with tears. Not a sound left you as you curled up on the bed, biting your fist as a punishment for your body's betrayal of emotions. All it would take was one minute of silence and the entire apartment would be able to hear how you were feeling. In all honesty, you didn’t want San to see you cry. Because in your mind, you didn’t deserve to cry. You were the one who picked a fight. You're the one who made unfair accusations, using his career and passions as weapons against him. You were the one that hurt him in the same ways that had been done to you, falsely claiming that it was to “beat him to it and strike first.” 

The front door slams shut, and you work quickly. You unbarricade the door and peek out, making sure no one is there. Dashing across the living space, you reach the spare bedroom and lock the door, not seeing the need for such extreme measures as earlier. You then sit with your back to the door, listening for the sign of San’s safe return from the store. Your butt has just about gone numb when this occurs, the front door shutting softly alerting you instantly. You rise from your position, albeit a little slowly due to your cramped muscles, and shuffle to the bed. A knock sounds, and a decision has to be made.

“Y/N? I know you’re awake. Can you come to bed? You and I both know that neither of us can sleep alone anymore.” San mumbles through the door. You hear shuffling, and you hold your breath thinking he might unlock the door. You’re not sure though, whether you’re holding your breath in hope or fear. But all you hear is a thud, indicating San sitting down. “Look, we don’t have to talk. You don’t even need to look at me, it just feels better for both of us if I’m holding you through the night, because at the end of the day, we still love each other, right?” 

San’s cheeks are marked with tear streaks, eyes red and puffy as he waits for any sign of confirmation from you. He loves you more than anything else, so much so that he’d give up everything for you, and needed to hear that you still loved him as well. He holds his breath, hands covering his face while he waits for you to show him a sign that you’re even listening. That you’re even there. 

You tip-toe over to the door, gently crouching down in front of it and rest your fingertips lightly on the wood, near where his shoulder is supposed to be. It’s cold and unyielding, but this is the bravest you’ll ever be. You hear a sigh on the other side, almost as if he can sense your presence.

“You know, you don’t have to keep it all in. From the first moment I saw you, I knew that there was so much going on in your life that it’d take time to get you to trust me. And I still want that. I want to know what’s going on in your life again. I want to hold you as you're crying again. And I want to repay you for all the times you’ve helped me.” San whispers, his voice showing how much of a toll this has taken on him. “I know a lot has changed, I travel a lot, and it’s harder for us to go anywhere without me being recognized. But I promise you that my feelings for you, the amount of love I feel for you, it’s all still there. If anything, I love you even more now than before. I don’t want to lose you Y/N. I want to keep fighting for us and I just need you to reach out to me, show me you want this too. Open the door, even if it’s just a crack, and let me help heal those open wounds. Yes there will be scars and yes it will take time, but I’m willing to wait.”

At this point you have tears streaming down your face as you withdraw your hand. You don’t move though, despite your broken mind willing you to do so, you stay rooted in your spot. Sniffles break through the other side, showing how much San is hurting. You feel as though there’s a war going on inside of you, your heart begging you to open the door and stop this madness, but your mind resolute on keeping this wall up. 

“I. Can’t.” you croak out, bringing your trembling hand to your lips and nibbling your thumbnail as you rise slowly. “They were right, I don’t deserve it. I don’t deserve you.”

“What? Who told you that?” San questions, confusion swirling in his head as he struggles to better understand where this was coming from. Standing, San presses his hands to the door, trying to open it only to find it locked. “Love, talk to me.”

“All I’ve been doing is hurting you, and I’m sorry. ” You whimper, your mind screaming at you to shut-up and not give away anything while your heart, your very being, is begging to be set free and allow him back in. “I, I love you, San.” And with that you rise, walking towards the bathroom attached to the room. You close the door, locking it and turning to the mirror to see your disheveled state. Tears stain your cheeks, your eyes have bags under them, and your hair is greasy and a mess from the lack of effort on your part to take care of yourself. 

Thoughts swirl and distort your reflection, harsh words clouding your mind. Some of the words surface from your past, some are from deep within you stemming from your lack of forgiveness for yourself. You don’t deserve forgiveness or a second chance. You don’t deserve him caring for you. You’re toxic. You do nothing but hurt him. Toxic. Toxic. 

You start screaming, starting in your gut and ripping out through your mouth, scaring the shit out of San who begins pounding on the door. You hear him calling out to you, but it’s muffled in your head as you continue to sob and scream at your reflection, running your hands through your hair before tugging on it out of frustration. The longer you look at yourself, the worse the feeling in your gut gets as the harsh words continue to tear you apart, worsening with each passing moment. With one last scream you pull your arm back and punch the mirror, desperate to feel something other than the all consuming self-hatred. And it works.

There’s a crack on the mirror with droplets of blood in the center. You bring your trembling hand into view, noticing your knuckles slightly bloodied and cut. The pain replaces all of the noise in your head, if only for a moment, and you become entranced by it. Raising your fist again, you punch the mirror once, twice, three more times before stopping to look at your handy work. The crack has grown and your hand is bleeding steadily, a couple of pieces of glass stuck in your knuckles. You’re ashamed of what and who you’ve become and raise your fist again when the door breaks down.

“WHAT THE HELL ARE YOU DOING?!” San shouts, restraining your flailing and screaming form as tears stream down your face. Four pairs of hands are pulling you out of the bathroom, with San’s arms wrapped tightly around your waist as he pulls you on the bed. He immediately starts shushing you, whispering into your hair as he wraps his legs around you as well, restricting you so the others can clean you up and call an ambulance if need be. At this point though, he doesn’t need to as you’ve gone completely limp, sobbing into his neck loudly as the emotions you’ve kept hidden flood out in a wave that swallows you whole. “Shh baby, it’s okay. We’re here now and we’re not leaving you. I’ve got you, we’ve got you. It’s okay, it’s okay.” His voice is trembling, absolutely terrified by what he’s just experienced. It’s lucky that Hongjoong, Yunho, and Seonghwa arrived when they did or he might have been too late, having planned on coming to help San piece back together your relationship. It took Yunho and Seonghwa to break down the doors, and all four of them carried you out of the bathroom so you wouldn’t hurt yourself or them.

Soon, you run out of energy and are left whimpering and quivering in San’s hold, slowly coming to your senses as you hear running water, hushed murmurs, and the cabinet mirror (or what’s left of it) being opened in search of something. When the realization sets in that San, Hongjoong, Seonghwa, and Yunho have seen you at your worst, your chest tightens and your breathing becomes irregular which are the first signs of a panic attack. Something San was familiar with but hadn’t seen happen in some time.

“No no no no.” San repeats, noticing the changes in your behavior and looking towards the bathroom. “Hongjoong! It’s getting worse!”

Immediately, footsteps can be heard heading in your direction, and a gentle face appears in the corner of your eye. Hongjoong slowly reaches forward, grasping the hand that had begun curling in on itself to the point of almost drawing blood and pulling it away from your chest.

“Sweetie, grab my hand and squeeze that instead. You won’t hurt me, I swear.” Hongjoong whispers, slowly working his nimble fingers between your clenched ones. It comes as a surprise to him when, instead of resisting, your hand flies open into a rigid position. “Shh… it’s okay sweet-heart. How about this. Follow this.”

Your hand is placed on a firm and warm chest, a slight bump hitting your palm and drawing your attention to the pattern. It’s his heartbeat. Hongjoong’s pulse creates a rhythm in your head, distracting you from your fears and disdain towards yourself momentarily while Seonghwa and Yunho both return to the room, one holding medical supplies and the other holding a bowl with warm water and a towel. Crouching in front of you, Seonghwa notices the hand on Hongjoong’s chest is the one that’s injured, glancing at San who is fighting back tears as he strokes your hair.

“Y/n-ah. We have to clean your hand. Put your hand on San’s chest, follow his heartbeat.” Seonghwa says in a firm yet kind tone. At this point, you’ve lost almost all self-awareness, too exhausted to fight anyone as you nod partially, removing your hand from Hongjoong’s chest to place on San’s. “No sweetie. The other hand.” Seonghwa instructs, a heartbroken smile crossing his face at the sight of you behaving like a toddler who skipped their nap. You look confused, bringing your hand to your face to inspect it, finding the streaks of blood and bits of glass as a few tears trickle down your face. 

You’re not sure how long it takes for Seonghwa to properly clean your hands, or when you got changed into one of San’s shirts that fits like a dress, but as you’re lied down on the bed with San, who’s watching you intently to make sure any slight changes on your face are caught immediately, you find yourself in an almost numbed mind-frame. Too exhausted and confused to comprehend anything around you. 

Your eyes slowly close, the occasional tear slipping out only to be swiped gently away by San. San, the last thing you see before you fall into a dreamless sleep. And you are blissfully unaware of what’s to come in the morning.

As you snore softly in San’s grasp, your chest rising and falling in a steady rhythm, Yunho leaves the room to clean up the mess that has been left behind with Seonghwa following closely behind, most likely to comfort the younger boy. Hongjoong reaches forward to brush hair out your eyes and slowly strokes your cheek. Who knew such a small body could take this much pain? he wonders to himself, not even beginning to understand what caused you to struggle so much and break down so devastatingly. And that’s the only way to describe your attack. Devastating.

Like a tsunami, you receded from social outings and even your true love San, and once they realized what was happening and why you’d “changed” the wave had already hit. But his main question was voiced by San.

“Hyung.” San rasps out, looking up at Hongjoong with tears streaming down his face. “Why-or how did this happen? What caused this? What are we-what am I supposed to do?” 

San’s breathing becomes labored, almost as if the weight of the situation has sat fully on his chest. He chokes on a sob, looking at you in your angelic state while pressing a gentle and wet kiss to the top of your head while crying. He clutches you to his chest, rocking slightly and burying his face in your head. Hongjoong panics, thinking he’ll wake you but settles once realizing how exhausted you must be. “Why would she keep this from me?”

“San-ah, I honestly don’t have the answer to that.” Hongjoong mumbles, holding his own tears back with a few deep breaths before looking at the pair of you. He honestly considered Ateez his family, and you became his little sister that he felt he needed to protect from the world. If only he’d realized sooner how much damage the world had already done to you. “But I do know one thing. Now more than ever, she needs us.”

San looks at his hyung and leader, absolutely wrecked from the storm of emotions that flowed between you two. “How?” he croaks out.

“I’m not sure. But what I do know is that the storm hasn’t gone and that this is only the beginning of our journey.” Hongjoong places a hand on your cheek and his other on San’s hand, squeezing slightly in hopes of reassuring the younger boy. “I see how much you need her San. And how much she needs you. She’s scared San. More so than any of us right now. Which is why we have to stay with her no matter what. No matter what she might say or do to scare us off, we have to fight through it all and show her we are here for her. Because if we don’t.” Hongjoong’s voice cracks, revealing his true emotions and the toll this whole ordeal has taken on him. “We might lose her forever.”

San sits quietly, shaking slightly from the silent tears that are being shed and pulling you closer to his chest if that was even possible, crying himself into a slumber much like you did moments prior. Hongjoong rises, tucking both of you in like he would an upset child, and walking into the bathroom. The scene that awaits him is what finally breaks his own dam of tears, collapsing next to Seonghwa and Yunho who are both crouched down. They’ve hunched over, scrubbing the white tiles of your blood and throwing glass shards away in a paper bag. Upon noticing Hongjoong, Yunho drops what’s in his hands, embracing his leader and best friend. His tears fall as well, the sight of someone as strong as Hongjoong breaking down terrifying him. 

Seonghwa wipes the few stray tears before rising, quickly finishing the task of cleaning before ushering the two broken boys out of the room. He sits Hongjoon and Yunho down, pulling out a paper and pen and titling it “Y/n’s Healing.”

“We’ll make a plan, and take this journey one step at a time. Until Y/n’s finally healed.” Seonghwa states, immediately writing steps and plans he’s already come up with in his head. And so the journey begins.

[annie-mit-ie]

Glimpses: Part 8 (Kathryn Hahn x Fem!Reader)

Part 1 // previous chapter <<< >>> next chapter

Summary: Babysteps are taken.

Word Count: 1,8k

A/N: Hey y’all! I am really sorry it took me a while to get to this but tbh life hasn't been the easiest since I’ve last posted. I hope you all enjoy this chapter, even though it turned out completely different than I had anticipated. Definitely plan to throw another chapter your way this week. We’ll see :)

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Her soft lips move against yours as Kathryn’s hand finds her way into your hair. She pulls you closer and it seems like she wants to deepen the kiss, but before she gets any chance to do so, you break the contact.

“Kathryn…“, both of you are panting and you have to hold on to her upper thigh to steady yourself. You take in a deep breath as she looks at you with widened eyes, while a worried look is creeping onto her face. She immediately lets go of your neck. Still panting, she tries to form words.

“Sweetheart, I… I am so sorry! I… Oh my god!“ Her eyes widen and she removes herself completely from you and puts a few more inches in between the two of you. “Is this…? Did we…? Are you okay?“

You nod, slowly, because you need time to process. What struck you and made you speechless wasn’t the fact that she kissed you in the first place, no, you are absolutely confused by her harsh reaction to the occurring situation. You look at her, eyes wide open, as she is sitting way too far away from you and looks at you like something horrible has happened.

“Kathryn, hey, I AM okay. Very much so, stop worrying. All is good!“ You take her hand in yours. “I… I loved this. This is everything I have ever dreamed of…“ “But?…“, she impatiently interrupts you and you give her the look that a mother gives her children when they repeatedly reach for a toy they are not allowed to have. 

“But… This is not how I want this to go. Let me take you out on a date or something?  Let’s go eat somewhere or read or talk or just sit… But not in the back of a car in the middle of the night as we are both very much not sober, hm?“ She nods and the hiccup, that escapes her throat right after you take her hand into yours again, just tells you that you’re right.

The rest of the ride is calm and quiet as Kathryn clearly is tired and overwhelmed with all the love she has gotten all night. You opt to just sit with her in silence, noticing how her body slowly falls against yours until her head lands on her shoulder. She is asleep.

You move a strand of hair behind her ear - prompting a small smile to form on her lips and it makes you feel proud that you did the grown up thing and resisted the urge to take a step further, the urge to see how far she would go, not that you could sneakily slip your hand anywhere anyway, considering she was still wearing that one-piece that was hugging her in all the right places.

Shaking your head to get rid of the thoughts that are flooding your tipsy brain right now, you realize you’ve reached your neighborhood right as the car slows down on the side walk. Peter opens the window to look at you “Do you want me to take you directly to your house or do you want to walk the rest of the way?“

You really appreciate how considerate he is, but you have to tell your mom eventually anyway, so you opt for the safer option. “Take me directly home, please.“ He nods and his eyes wander to Kathryn, who is still asleep on your shoulder. “You’re good for her, I hope you know that.“, Peter says before closing the window again.

“YOU DID WHAT?“ You haven’t seen your best friend enraged like that ever before. “YOUR./NAME… YOU DID WHAT NOW?

Telling her that you were the one who broke off a kiss with Kathryn was probably not your smartest idea in a while. When you got home last night, you went straight to bed, but texted Alex that you were gonna call her as soon as you woke up to give her all the tea.

“I… I broke the kiss?“ You repeat and look at her, scared she will yell at you again.

“Honey! How??? Why? This could’ve very well been a one in a lifetime chance!“ She is not mad or anything, more shocked because she knows how much you’ve wanted this.

You look at her and both of you become serious for a moment. “It wasn’t right. We had too much to drink. I know she wanted it. We’ve had moments before, but… I just didn’t feel right, Alex. I don't know how to explain. Don’t get me wrong, I was into it, very much so, but I want the real deal. Not a car fling, you know?“ “You really are the most amazing person I’ve ever met. I hope she knows how fortunate she is to know someone as respectful as you.“ It still felt unusual to talk about Kathryn that way. Even to your best friend. Even though you know you share everything with Alex that is there to share. Kathryn was Kathryn and you were… just you. But somehow, when the two of you are together, that doesn't matter at all. You don’t think about who she is when you are with Kathryn.

Right as you think about her, your phone lights up and you receive a message.

„Sweetheart, I really enjoyed having you around last night! Can’t wait to do it again. Packed week ahead, sadly, but would like to invite you to my garden again by the end of it? xxx K.“

For a moment, you smile and already want to text back, but you had read the message out to Alex as well and she doesn’t want you to text back just yet. “Can’t wait to do it again?“, she says. “Like as in the kiss or as in the night, well I mean the day, in general? DUDE. That’s huge!“ You hadn’t thought about it that way. Alex was wild sometimes. She would come up with things that you haven’t considered yet, but not always in a good way. Sometimes, she drops knowledge on you until your anxiety kicks in and she doesn’t even notice. Not this time, though.

This time, Alex’ remark only makes your chest swell with pride because, either way, it was a huge compliment. You let Kathryn know that you feel the same and you would love to visit her again.

The following week seems to be endless but somehow you make your way through it, especially with a Q&A that was announced Sunday night and would happen today. Kathryn is booked to watch an episode of her latest show Wandavision with some cast members on something like Zoom, where they can be seen by fans around the globe to promote upcoming shows and increase streams.

She had texted you a selfie earlier, and captioned it with how she was missing your compliments while getting ready, with a wink, of course, and you that made you even more excited to see her later. 

The event itself is cute, hundreds of fans are online and even though you can’t see the other fans, you all can feel the unity and love towards the cast. You’re sitting on your desk, laptop propped up in front of you with the stream, while you are FaceTiming Alex who stayed awake for the event like she always does.

“Kathryn is just soooo beautiful tonight.“ Alex swoons, as you watch her staring at the stream. Kathryn does look great. Her blue eyes are highlighted by the blue button up shirt she is wearing and her hair is loosely hanging down one side. Ben really outdid himself with tonight’s look. She smiles at something Lizzie says and they both laugh as they watch the scene where Agatha and Wanda are in the kitchen together.

“Many mouths make good gossip.“ Alex laughs and you can see Kathryn grin in the corner of your eyes as you look at her best friend. “Have you told her she looks beautiful yet?“

It was a logical question. Shooting her a message would be so easy and yet, you haven’t thought of it yet. You shake your head.

“Gurl! Take your phone and text her, NOW! Let’s gooooooo.“ She was right. You had the perfect chance right there and you were sure Kathryn would not be looking at her phone anytime soon. Most likely, she would only see your message after the event, so you decide to go for it after all.

“Looking really good tonight, Ms Hahn. ;)“ you finally type. It took you a couple tries and you reworded the message several times, trying to figure out what tone would fit best. After deleting the previous ideas, you just want to not send anything at all, but as you reread your final words , you feel satisfaction and that makes you decide to shoot your shot after all.  

Ales notices our internal struggle “Y/N! Send that freaking message NOW.“ You know she would take your phone and just press send if she was with you and you want this friendship to feel a little less distant tonight, so you immediately press send.

Immediately, the both of you keep your eyes on the stream to not miss any possible reactions and you were wrong. Kathryn actually does have her phone with her and you can tell she notices a message because she looses attention for a second and looks to her left.

You can tell she rethinks if she should pick up her phone or not, but before you can worry about the whole situation more, she reaches out for her phone and reads. The smile on her face is telling. She tries to tone the smile down but it still creeps onto her face on one side. You’re not sure, but you would also say that there is a little blush around her nose that you think is adorable and makes a warm feeling bubble up in your body. OH NO.

Shortly, she looks directly at the camera with the softest smile, before putting the phone back aside and giving her attention back to the cast and episode.

“JACKPOT!“ Alex celebrates an early win. „She loved it! See! Aaaaargh, I am SO GOOD AT THIS.“

 You roll your eyes. “You have a wife, honey, OBVIOUSLY you are.“

And while the two of you laugh about your antics and virtually high five because messaging Kathryn was a success,  the other fans on twitter are already freaking out about the mysterious message Kathryn has gotten and who it might've been from.

[heyitsyn]

,,,,OK Kurat

Soulmate!Bokuto

a/n: when bokuto refuses to fix his roots and let the gray dye grow out and it slightly irritates you

colorblind soulmate where you lose your colors and only gain them back when your other half starts to have feelings for you

requests are open!!

so, leggo?

ever since you turned 16, you’ve literally gone colorblind

like you were perfectly happy seeing the colors of the world

from daichi’s red sweater

to hinata’s orange hair

you were ROBBED of the colors of the world

when you woke up that morning, you knew you would get your soulmate sign soon and you were sure it would happen while you were in class as it would start the exact time you were born 16 years ago

so there you were, happily eating with nishi and tanaka at the roof

‘hey, y/n-chan, look at this manga i found!’

you look up at noya and you almost choked on your rice ball when you couldn’t see his blonde streak anymore

it was like the moment you blinked, it was gone

he must’ve noticed your surprised look because noya touched the front floof since you were staring right at it

tanaka had his mouth opened and patted your back when you coughed

‘ah, it happened now?’

then you just start bawling

‘i cANt sEE yOuR hAiR anYmoRE!! aNd hiNATa’s hAiR! aND tHE oRANgE uniFOrMS!’

they understand it was a touchy subject for you since you were expecting something cute like noya’s thought sharing sign or tanaka’s taste sharing sign

but NO!!!

‘it’s okay y/n-chan. you’ll meet them soon and you’ll get your colors back’

from then on, all you’ve done is research all you can about soulmate signs and how they worked

yours happens to be a rarer one and you groaned bc of course it would happen to YOU

it states that usually, the moment you lock eyes with your soulmate, you’d get your lost sense back

but you wouldnt know when it would exactly happen and be like your uncle who is nearly 40 and still cant smell anything

whats worse, there were even cases where you wouldnt get them back in one sight but gain them when they start to have romantic feelings for you

you really do hope you’d get the easier 

being a part-time manager, you often helped the vbc if you were free from your other clubs so you sometimes help kiyoko with the kids

entering the gym, you frowned when you saw hinata and the gray tone of his hair

everything was gray but colors that are light like yellow or bright orange, were lighter gray while darker ones were dark gray or black

seems like tanaka and noya told the team what happened because daichi went up to you and ruffled your hair before saying it’ll be okay

‘give it time! you will find them!’

yacchi, a manager-in-training, enthusiastically told you about her ideas for the poster and gave you her rough draft, explaining the little details

but you were out of it as you just roamed your eyes over the gray-colored paper

thus causing her to freak out

‘OH MY GOD! I”M SO SORRY Y/N-SAN! I FORGOT ABOUT IT!! I’M SO SORRY!’

(yacchi is just a little precious bun, please protec her :’))

but you ruffled her hair and put on a smile

‘don’t sweat it, yacchi’

after that whole thing about announcement of the tokyo training camp and the hinata/kageyama idiot squad

you guys were in the bus, getting ready for Tokyo

it’s also been weeks since you lost it so you were still new but you were starting to get used to it

ofc you still had mistakes like their different colored practice jerseys and who was in what team or wearing different colored socks

but you were slowly adapting

it was a few hours of a drive so everyone was static to get out of the cramp bus and use the bathroom and stretch their legs

you took your time and put the others trash into a plastic bag bc youre just a great manager like that

getting out of the bus, you heard a horrendous and terrifying laugh and saw the nekoma captain hunching over in laughter

‘my god. at least his face makes up for it’

you got a text from hinata and kageyama saying that they were going to take their exams now and you sent them a little encouraging blurb

the guy from nekoma with the mohawk gawked at the 3 managers and you remembered him having that blonde hair dye

when you and the rest entered their gym, all you saw were balls flying everywhere and lots of people

your eyes scanned for at least someone to make eye contact with you because this gym has a lot of people in it and there could be a possibility they were in here

like 0.000003% probably but still a chance

from the managers to the players, not one reactivated the colors

‘hm,,, i think my soulmate is in here’

noya’s little comment made you glare at him in envy and he grinned with a peace sign

you noticed that boy kenma with his haircut and there was someone sitting near him that made you turn to the others

‘okay, either i just have terrible memory but is that a new guy?’

suga wondered the same thing and you flinched at the kid’s harsh stare at you all

there was a light gray tone to his hair and eyes so you were curious what color they were

‘his legs look a little long. i think he’s taller than most of these guys’

asahi said which made you give him a look

‘listen, as long as we got tsukki-kun, we’re okay’

the first match was against some powerhouse called fukurodani and they had a few interesting players

by interesting, you meant looks wise

that one guy looked freaking pretty with his sharp eyes while the other guy, who you assumed to be the captain, had round eyes and spiked hair

you were pretty sure that he had different colored hair due to the mix of black and light tones

AND THE WAY IT WAS STYLED THO

its like he got electrocuted and his hair just stayed the same

you were too busy looking at the 2 teams that you completely missed karasuno’s defeat and just saw them doing flying receives

the others gathered to the side and the next game was against fukurodani and nekoma

from hearing the names being said, that pretty guy was akashi or aggghasshi and the owl looking dude was bokuto-san or bokutosang or something bokuto bc youre not exactly sure

and then he be flying

‘he REALLY flying!’ 

you exclaim and tbh what can you expect from being one of the top 5 aces in the country

then the ball straight flew towards your own player and you and yamagucci screamed for his name

everyone flinched when the ball hit his hand and you ran over to check

‘ouch’

you hear that loud voice of his on top of kei’s hiss and you growled

‘HEY HEY HEY’

he didnt even apologize and if it wasnt for tanaka and daichi holding you back, you were about to scream into the guys ear for damaging your player’s hand since he needed it to block properly

‘LET ME GO! WHO DOES HE THINK HE IS INJUR-’

suga smiled and raised a hand apologetically your shouts caught the attention of others

the more games karasuno played, the more they lost

you went to fill up their water bottles and was mumbling to yourself, blaming that freak haired guy for tsukki’s pained blocks

‘didnt even apologize. how dare he hurt my boy’

bokuto was going for a drink when he heard your mumbles by the water fountain

he noticed you as the karasuno manager and poked you in the shoulder

‘ah! youre the manager!’

cue you looking to glare at him since you could recognize that voice anywhere

‘and you are?’

taken aback with your tone, he grinned

‘bokuto. bokuto koutarou’

‘ah’

then you went back to filling up the bottles

he fiddled with his towel before poking you again

‘um,,, i want to apologize for earlier. sorry about that spike’

you stopped and you nodded

‘i appreciate the apology, bokuto-san. but you should say it to him’

bo guessed that you were kinda their mother hen and you looked after the players of your team

‘are you,,, a third year?’

closing the lid of the last bottle, you placed it on the basket

‘second’

his eyes widened before shouting

‘im your senpai!’

you jumped at the sudden volume of his voice and awkwardly smiled

‘ah. okay, bokuto-san’

his eyes widened before patting your shoulder gently

‘drop the -san! i prefer being called senpai!’

does this guy have a senpai kink or something

but there was probably nothing wrong with calling him senpai right?

‘okay, bokuto-senpai’

you were lowkey kinda iffy since you dont really call anyone senpai, everyone was -san to you

bo laughed loudly and ruffled your hair

‘WAH!!!!!! MY LITTLE KOUHAI!!!’

‘bokuto-san!’

your head looked up and you saw the pretty guy walking towards you

he bowed in front of you in both greeting and apology

‘sorry about him. he gets a little excited sometimes. im akaashi keiji by the way’

you waved it off and smiled gently

‘nice to meet you, akaashi-san. and dont worry, i have two people like him in my team’

hinata and noya

‘come on. the next game is about to start’

he tugged bokuto’s arm and bo waved at you before walking away

‘see ya!’

but stopped

‘ah! i didnt get your name!’

‘y/n. l/n y/n’

‘see ya later y/n!’

when you came back, the boys were still doing flying and you glanced at your watch, knowing that your boys should be coming soon

you and yacchi were visibly listening to the other players talking about your team and kiyoko gave you both a look to settle down

‘hold it in, girls’

the sea of different tones of gray were currently making you dizzy with so many things happening at ones and you completely missed the door opening, revealing tanaka’s sister

noya’s excited shout made you turn and you waved excitedly

you’ve met her once when you went over to help tutor her poor brother and noya who practically lives at their house

everyone stopped what they were doing and saw the two boys huffing by the door

you heard kuroo’s comment but you were too excited to see them come back in one piece

‘ah, so those are the legendary first years’

hm, if only you knew why they were late

bo saw you with wide eyes and excitedly bouncing at the sidelines as karasuno started to play

‘what are you looking at bokuto-san?’

akaashi asked

bo thought you were interesting the moment he heard you angrily mumble about him and he thought your pouting face was cute

‘i wonder what her soulmate mark is’

akaashi knew about his soulmate sign since he received a very frantic phone call that sunday afternoon of bokuto not being able to see the color of his apple anymore

‘she probably doesnt have it yet’

akaashi’s answer made his brows furrow

‘she’s a second year so shes probably 16 already’

‘why would it matter to you anyways?’

yea, why did it matter?

‘just general curiosity. shes quite fiesty. i like her. i want to be friends’

akaashi sighs and pats his back

‘i support you, bokuto-san’

shoot this might as well be a bokuaka

he saw you run to the two first years and took their bags for them, ruffling their hair each

even though you’re only like a some months older than hinata, you still treat him like a babie

‘coach left some buns from earlier so you can eat that before you play. oh! i also got you your milk, kags!’

bo literally could feel your happiness radiating and he saw your eyes

too bad he couldn’t see the color of them

although the boys team was finally complete, they still lost quite a lot of sets

and they were trying so hard and you were just cheering on the sidelines w yacchi and kiyoko

you kept running back and forth from the drinking fountain since the boys kept drinking so much water

and bo just finds you there again

for the second time today

:0

‘oh? back again, y/n-chan?’

you could recognized that gruffy voice anywhere

you turned and gave him a tight smile

‘ah. hello bokuto-san’

he pouted and nudged you with a finger to your shoulder

‘senpai! call me senpai!’

you were pretty sure he was 18 yet he still threw a tantrum

what kinda-

‘okay okay. sorry, bokuto-senpai’

then like a switch his pouts became grins and you got dizzy with the sudden mood switch

‘youre such a diligent manager, y/n-chan. you should transfer to our school and be one of ours instead!’

then you remember meeting the 2 managers they had

‘ah, you already have 2 so i think you’re covered’

bo whined at that

‘but karasuno also has 2 without you!’

tbh you shouldve been uncomfortable in this situation bc here you have a grown man whining

but you found his pout endearing and his eyes were loony-looking

‘not to hurt your feelings, bokuto-senpai, but we just met and i don’t know you all that well’

‘then you know the solution to that, don’t you?’

you just stared at him

‘lets get to know each other! lets be friends! lets be close!’

you couldnt say anything else since you were kinda in a pickle here so you just nodded

‘um, okay’

‘bokuto-san!’

that voice made you perk up and you raised a hand

‘akaashi-san!’

bo saw your smile and he pouted, jealous that you didnt give that smile when you saw him

‘ah, l/n-san.’

you looked at bo and his eyes grew even bigger and you resisted the urge to pinch his cheeks with how they puffed out with his pout

woah wait huh

why did you just think of that

akaashi had to bring back bo to the gym for their match but bo refused to walk

‘no! not until y/n-chan wants to be my friend!’

what are you

5?

but you nodded, placing a hand around his bicep

you froze, trying to contain the shock of how S T R O N G they felt

ohmygad

‘l-lets get to know each other later, bokuto-sa-senpai’

you hurriedly corrected yourself and breathed a sigh of relief when he didnt notice

a big smile got to his face and he pointed at you

‘ill win this for you y/n-chan!’

you sweatdropped bc wow this manz is winning a game for you

no-for your friendship

he excitedly ran back down the hallway and disappeared with a faint ‘hey hey hey!’

you and akaashi shared a look and he apologized

‘im sorry if he made you uncomfortable’

‘nah nah, its okay’

‘and thanks for uplifting him. he was in a mood when he left bc we lost a set but now he’s energized thanks to you’

a,,, mood?

‘is he,,, i dont know,,,, bipolar?’

akaashi stood for a second before shrugging

‘i guess you could say that. the team tries to uplift him bc if hes in a mood he messes up’

a sound of recognition left your lips before you nodded

‘ah okay’

‘well, i guess im seeing you later then, l/n-san?’

‘oh, please. call me y/n. we’re the same age!’

but he gave you a mysterious smile

‘i dont think bokuto-san would like that’

so the remaining of the time there, bo was practically stuck to you as he followed you everywhere

babie calls it ‘friendship bonding’

when yall were leaving, he was pouting so hard and you gave in to your urges

;)

you pinched his cheeks

‘until next time, bo-senpai’

blew a fuse right then and there

bO-sENPai

yall remained in contact and you even went up to visit him and just hang out

you were lowkey catching feelings

like when he sent you that mirror picture of him and kuroo being sassy in a department store and your heart started beating really really fast

then your palms started sweating as you remembered the feeling of his warm hands on yours when he led you through the busy sidewalk of tokyo

‘siri, am i having a stroke?’

but you were like ‘nuh-uh, must remain pure for my soulmate’

however

if you have those feelings already and it’s towards your soulmate, that gave bo his sight of colors

just sitting there w his team eating yakisoba bun then he looked at akaashi and saw his friend’s blue eyes again

can you tell im a bokuaka simp

in another life flashbacks

n e ways

he was so happy and ecstatic and was about to call you but akaashi was like, ‘wait, i think she might be your soulmate’

the entire team was just like, ‘what’

and bo just sitting there, ‘omg what if’

akaashi, 

grandmaster plan creator

tells bokuto to hold off from telling you until the next time yall see each other which is in the training camp

for story’s sake, training camp finally rolls around

you cannot stop squirming in your seat bc ya finally get to see bo again after so long

kuroo greets yall at the front and hes familiar w you since you hung out w the tokyo squad

‘you have a surprise little chibi’

you were just like, ‘,,,,ok kurat’

meanwhi;e,,

bo was so antsy and he was just like, ‘yey! i get to see her again!’

ngl, bo thought you were really pretty and cute and he thinks he has a crush on you but not like head-over-heels like you were

literally cannot stand still and the team was tired of having to keep him from running so akaashi just let him go

‘but dont run her over, bokuto-san’

he sonic bolts over

nYOOM

he finally sees that tangerine hinata and was searching for your hair color and when he sees you laughing at kuroo’s face, his eyes widened

his heart beat started beating really really fast and everything in his brain and all the words he wanted to say died down

he never really saw your face with colors but he just stares in awe at your beautiful skin color, breathtaking eyes, silky hair, and those plump lips

sweat started to gather at his palms and his feet started moving on its own until he just scoops you in his arms, lifting you off the ground in the process

w you, there was a silence

‘your eyes,,,,, theyre beautiful’

bo just grins at the crack of your voice and tears just wells up in your eyes w a smile

‘bo!’ 

you shouted and you wrapped your legs around his waist while he burrows his head in your neck

‘you’re so beautiful. oh my god, you’re so beautiful’

omg what i would do for bo to say that to me

obvs, the others knew what was happening

dai and suga were already planning on the talk

kuroo just recording the whole thing

‘im falling in love with you. i want to fall in love with you over and over again until i die. i want to feel like this forever. can i?’

just forgets about everyone and being in your own bubble and your own world as bokuto just professes his love for you

‘stupid question, koutaro!’

you giggled and he finally allowed you to stand on your own two feet

‘let me love you for eternity’

cue waterworks from noya and tanaka and konoha

‘but baby, we need to touch up your roots, though.’

‘we got forever, soulmate’

sorry if this was trash

[violetwolfraven]

Willie Headcanons

So I actually came up with this like a month ago and forgot to post it. Anyway enjoy my headcanons about our favorite sk8er boi. Be ready for feels.

Tw: death, car accident mention, emotional manipulation.

...

In my mind, Willie had a good relationship with his parents. They were supportive and everything. They both loved Willie very much.

And Willie has youngest child energy so I’m saying he has a sister who’s 2 years older and a brother who’s 5 years older. Their names are Delilah and Austin.

AND ALL THREE OF THEM ARE ADRENALINE JUNKIES.

Seriously imagine the worst possible combination of head empty only skateboarding and you’ve got Willie, Delilah, and Austin.

Austin started skating when he was 7 and got Delilah hooked on it a year later.

Their parents kinda didn’t like the idea of it but those two had already started teaching Willie basic stuff by the time he was 3.

But... the other two had other interests. Delilah was into art (painting) and Austin played piano (like, really well).

For Willie, skateboarding was his thing. And it always was.

He had fun with it when his big brother would put his hands on his and teach him to play a bit, or his sister would give him some paint and a spare canvas and they’d doodle together, but it wasn’t like skating.

As far as I’ve seen (which admittedly isn’t that far) it’s widely accepted that Willie has ADHD so I’m leaning into that here.

And Willie inherited his brain from his dad, who had a bad experience with meds and so wouldn’t let any of his kids go through it.

So Willie grew up unmedicated but probably better off for the time period. His dad taught him coping mechanisms. Him and Austin. Delilah didn’t inherit it but she was taught to empathize with her brothers and recognize when they needed her help with something.

She’s a badass who can and does beat up anybody who’s mean to her brothers for missing social cues.

But anyway while Austin had piano (and skating as a side thing) Willie got even more hooked on skateboarding than either of his siblings because his brain latched onto it from a young age and couldn’t let go.

We all have our outlets. The chaos in our brains has to go somewhere. For Willie it goes into skating.

When he’s young he and his siblings will skateboard to school and then after school they’ll skate all around Hollywood for hours.

They do their homework in random McDonalds and Denny’s and tbh become local cryptid customers. Like they’re just these 3 super friendly skater siblings who tip really well and visit every fast food place within a 20 mile radius of their house with varying frequency.

They also find e v e r y skatepark, empty pool, and vacant lot in that 20 mile radius that they can possibly find.

Their parents have to bail them out of jail for trespassing and the occasional vandalism every so often.

Sometimes one of them has stuff to do and it’s just two of them out skating but if two of them are busy the other one never goes out alone cause it’s dangerous. We’ll get back to that later.

So anyway when they’re 17, 14, and 12, Delilah comes out as a lesbian.

And the family is supportive of course because they’re a good family.

But her coming out gets Willie thinking. About how some of his friends have crushes on girls but he just... doesn’t see the appeal.

Like he has a couple friends who are girls and they’re great and he likes hanging out with them at recess but he doesn’t get the hype. They’re just more friends. So he doesn’t really see what his big sister is so interested in either.

In my mind Willie actually is from around the same time as the boys (dying in like 1999) so one day while nobody else in their house is home he and Delilah are watching Star Wars: Return of the Jedi and Willie’s again wondering why people think Leia is so hot cause she’s cool and all but Luke is right there and he looks really good and—

Willie: I think I might be gay.

Delilah: Yeah I know.

They talk about it and Willie does decide to tell the rest of the family but he’s a bit wary about anyone else because he saw how some of Delilah’s friends turned on her after she came out. He doesn’t want that to happen to him.

He does end up telling a few of his friends but he doesn’t quite not care what people think of him the way his big sister does.

Austin is the only straight one and he’s like. So awkward about it but in a sweet way.

Austin: So, Britney Spears is hot, right?

Delilah: Stop.

And

Austin: So I saw you hanging around Chris the other day are you two..?

Willie: ...no...???

Austin: Cool, yeah I didn’t think so. Just had to make sure. Not that I’m doubting your ability to get boys but I’d have to shovel talk him if you were.

Willie: If I ever do get a boyfriend, please don’t.

He tries. He’s a himbo if that wasn’t clear. Where did you think Willie learned it?

So anyway fast forward a couple years and they’re 22, 19, and 17. Austin and Delilah are both in college and Willie’s the last one left at home and things between their parents start getting... tense.

Like they don’t fight exactly but they’ve fallen out of love and things are awkward.

Even Austin and Delilah can tell and they’re only home on breaks and some weekends but for Willie it’s right there and he’s watching it happen. He has no option but to see.

They used to have a rule that they don’t go skating alone because it’s dangerous but Willie just can’t make himself stay home so he goes out skateboarding.

At first it’s never too far from home or anywhere where there’s too much traffic but as things get increasingly awkward at home he goes out farther and farther, chasing the adrenaline high he used to get from going anywhere and everywhere every day after school with his siblings.

Then his parents officially tell him they’re getting divorced and

And it’s not like he couldn’t see it coming, but... it still hurts.

And neither of his siblings are coming home any time soon so

So he goes out skating on his own, way too far from home. He keeps going until he doesn’t even know where he is anymore.

He isn’t really paying attention the way he should but that’s not why he runs into trouble.

The driver of that red pickup is drunk and he rounds the corner out of nowhere.

If Delilah or Austin had been there they could have yelled for Willie to jump out of the way, or maybe up on the hood so the impact wouldn’t be as bad, but he’s alone.

So he gets hit, and the car was going fast enough that he’s dead before he even hits the pavement.

After that there’s a lot of confusion but once Willie figures out he’s a ghost... it’s too painful to think about going home, so he just... doesn’t.

He doesn’t want to see his family mourning him, so he just distracts himself, skating everywhere he couldn’t before without getting busted.

Plus some old routes where he used to go with Delilah and Austin, just for something that’s familiar but not too familiar.

He’s on one of those more familiar routes a few weeks after his death when he’s skating down Sunset Boulevard one night, singing along to Toxic by Britney Spears blasting from a nearby club and a man dressed in a purple suit comments on how he’s got a good voice.

Honestly Willie is just so relieved to have someone to talk to that he forgets about stranger danger completely.

Plus he recognizes an Elder Gay in Caleb and assumes he can trust him because the Elder Gays he met at pride that one time he went with Delilah were so nice and understanding of how reassuring it was to see queer people of older generations who got a happy ending.

Caleb barely even has to try. He just lets this 17-year-old obviously-queer ghost rant at him for a few minutes, asks a few questions and finds out that he also can play piano, and convinces him to come to the Hollywood Ghost Club the next night.

From there it’s not like Willie has anyone to save him so of course he has to join the club.

At first he’s completely alone because the other performers scare him almost as much as Caleb does.

Then slowly, he sees how they give him space because they know he’s scared of them. How they turn a blind eye when he leaves the club without permission. How they don’t critique his mistakes with the same sarcasm they show each other.

Willie starts to realize that the other performers are doing their best to look out for him, and he starts being less afraid.

They’re all too concerned with their own survival to really protect him but if they draw some attention to themselves occasionally so Caleb doesn’t notice Willie being slow to pick up some tricky choreography, that’s not too risky.

The others are all like 21 at the youngest and they really don’t appreciate Caleb tricking a literal child into working for him no matter how talented said child is. (Cause Willie is good at singing and piano. It’s just not his passion.)

The twins are 22 but they died in 1925 and before that they were performing to support a younger brother who they never got to say goodbye to so maybe they see Willie as a kind of second chance.

Lyssa (what I decided to name drummer woman because I don’t know her real name if she has one) is 25 and she died in 1984. She had a daughter who’d be about Willie’s age now and... who knows? Maybe they were friends.

Fuego is 24 and from 1951 and he had a childhood best friend who enlisted and died in WWII that he thought he might get to see when he died but that boy moved on and so... well, Willie’s just a little younger than his friend was the last time he saw him.

In short Willie becomes everyone’s baby brother and they do what they can to look out for him even if they’re just as scared of Caleb as he is.

And the better adjusted Willie gets to (after)life at the HGC and the better they get to know him, the guiltier the others start to feel about him being stuck there.

Eventually a combination of guilt and worked-up courage leads Fuego tells him about the whole unfinished business thing, in hopes maybe he can figure his out and get away from Caleb.

It doesn’t take Willie long to think of his family, how hopeless he felt about the divorce, how worried he was it would change everything and then how scared he was to see his family in pain because of his death.

He realizes his unfinished business is probably seeing them. Letting himself say goodbye.

He almost gets away with it.

Caleb catches up and stops him in the driveway of his house and poofs them back to the HGC.

He convinces (gaslights) Willie into believing that saying goodbye was never his unfinished business and even if it was it’s not like it would matter because Caleb wouldn’t let him do it.

The next morning he ships the HGC out to Tokyo. They stay on the move for a long time and when they are in town, Willie is basically locked in his room.

The next time he’s allowed out in Hollywood, his parents don’t live in their old house anymore and he has no way to find them.

As a coping mechanism, he just starts making the best of a bad situation. Becoming better friends with the other ghosts. Helping soften the blow whenever someone new comes along.

None of that means he stops checking the faces of passing skaters or keeping eyes on restaurants his folks used to like, but it does mean he more or less gives up hope.

That’s what he’s doing when he bumps into Alex.

Look, Willie loves his friends at the HGC. He really does. But there’s a big difference between 17 and 20-something. Like the others will drink alcohol some nights and technically Willie was born over 21 years ago but he still feels weird enough about it that he doesn’t drink.

He hasn’t talked to anyone his age in a long time so Alex is a breath of fresh air.

Also he’s like. Really cute. And sweet. And funny. And shit, Willie’s fallen for him before he even has time to think about it.

He keeps thinking about how Alex doesn’t seem like he’d be physically capable of hurting someone on purpose so Austin would approve and every once in a while there’s that sarcasm that pops out which means he’d get along great with Delilah.

In general Alex is the kind of guy he would’ve loved to take home to meet the family. Them not included, he’s kind of... everything Willie’s missed about Hollywood in the form of one person.

Then they hang out more and Alex is still everything he’s missed but he’s also so much more than that and...

It almost feels like a part of Alex is still alive. And for the first time in years, a part of Willie feels alive, too.

They’ve known each other for like a week tops and Willie is already in love.

Not that he’s admitting that to anyone, because he’s learned the hard way that anyone you care about can be used against you.

Still... when Alex asks for help getting revenge on Bobby, he can’t bring himself to say no because he needs to keep Alex in his (after)life and the only way he knows how to do that (or to make people be nice to him in general) is to be as useful as possible.

That turns out to be a big mistake, because Caleb sees right through him in an instant, targets Alex to confirm it, then immediately starts the process to trick the boys into committing to eternity at the HGC.

Willie feels like an idiot for thinking he could actually get away with it. Doing something good for someone he cares about.

He hadn’t thought Caleb would be interested in them because he’d never actually heard them play. The assumption was that he’d make them do some small favor and then let them talk to their bandmate for 5 minutes. A clean deal where they never have to commit to anything. Willie forgot to take magic into account.

He almost manages to convince himself it was all a bad dream, but when he seeks out Alex and his friends to check on them, he can almost feel the jolts himself, and seeing Alexthem in pain feels terrible.

Willie knows that theoretically they could figure out their unfinished business and cross over, but that all depends on finding it and doing it fast enough and if they failed...

People you care about can be used against you. And Willie does not want to be used against Alex again. He doesn’t want to see Alex used against him.

So he keeps his distance, in hopes Caleb will think he lost interest. He’s pretty sure once the boys find out about the stamp they’ll hate him, anyway.

And plus, as he’s been taught by his friends at the HGC, you have to look out for yourself because no one else will do it for you. Maybe you hurt somebody by not standing up for them, but you can apologize later and hope they forgive you. You can’t apologize if you’re gone, and it’s not like it would make a difference anyway because Caleb is too powerful for anyone to beat.

The thought of how spending eternity with Alex might not be so bad even if it has to be at the HGC does come up, but ironically that’s what makes Willie decide to screw his courage to the sticking point and tell them.

Because he has seen what decades at the club has done to his friends.

They’re all great performers, and they perform happiness well even to each other, but Willie knows them enough to know how tired they all are. How they have been doing the same thing over and over again for decades and they are sick of it.

They’re young, talented tragedies lost to drug overdoses, or AIDS, or accidents, or suicide, and they should’ve gotten to rest after everything they went through in their lives. Instead, they got a curse disguised as a blessing. They got to stay on a stage, got to keep performing and soaking up applause, never got to stop.

Willie has been there a shorter time than most of them and he feels it. The exhaustion, because ghosts are supposed to haunt for a few years then figure out their unfinished business and move on. They’re not meant to be trapped for decades, used as party tricks.

A part of Alex still feels alive and being trapped in the Hollywood Ghost Club for years on end would kill that part of him.

Willie can’t let that happen, so as hard as it is...

He tells the boys what’s wrong with them. And by that hurt, betrayed look in Alex’s eyes, he’s honestly expecting him to never forgive him.

But then Alex does. And that almost hurts worse because whether he figures out his unfinished business or not, Willie doubts he’s ever going to see him again.

He honest to God almost cries when Alex hugs him because... shit, he hasn’t gotten a hug since he was breathing.

He goes back to the HGC and tries to go about his day, and keeps replaying how good it felt to have Alex’s arms around him, hoping that memory will get him through the next few decades on his own.

The ghosts at the club do actually gossip a fair amount and by this point all of them know about the 3 dead members of Sunset Curve.

So when Willie admits to Helen (what I’m calling one of the twins) that Alex hugging him was the first time he’d gotten a hug since he died, she hugs him tight for a good 20 seconds, telling him she’s sorry he has to lose him, and if Willie closes his eyes he can almost pretend it’s Delilah.

The next thing he knows, he’s locked in a closet.

Caleb comes to talk to (intimidate) him a few hours later, saying he knows what Willie did.

He’s magically locked in his room alone for a couple weeks after that and it’s essentially psychological torture.

Helen, Anna (what I decided to call the other twin), Dante, Fuego, Lyssa, and everyone else tell him not to test Caleb for the next couple years, but Willie has a heart full of love and a head full of fuck it, so he doesn’t listen.

He gives it exactly one day of being/acting scared and obedient, then goes out without permission again, fully intending to scream in a museum alone to let out all his feelings.

Remember: Willie didn’t see the Orpheum performance. He doesn’t know the boys didn’t cross over but by Caleb’s mood he has a feeling the outcome of that scenario was not in the magician’s favor.

He gets there and it’s literally this comic by the very talented @williessweatycherrysocks

He can’t stay long but he and Alex scream in each other’s faces, talk a bit, maybe sing a duet.

After that, they sneak to see each other when they can but don’t get to see much of each other for months.

It’s hard on both of them but they don’t give up on their relationship.

Through long and complicated events which I will outline later, Willie eventually gets free of the HGC, hugs his friends goodbye already making plans to take down Caleb for good to free them, too, and promptly declines an offer to stay in the Molinas’ garage.

As much as he wants to be close to Alex he’s done being confined to one place.

He still comes and visits like every day tho.

He knows a lot more about ghosting than the other boys do so he and Carlos get along amazingly like:

Carlos: So do you know who Jack the Ripper was?

Willie: No? How old do you think I am?

Carlos: I dunno but I thought it might be Caleb cause that would explain how he never got caught.

Willie, taking notes in his Things To Potentially Use To Take Caleb Down notebook: You’re a tiny genius.

No one was expecting it but everyone is in awe of how well he and Carrie get along. Between the two of them they know so much celebrity gossip. (and it’s definitely a good thing he’s on good terms with her cause she and Alex are close)

On the angsty side, Willie also bonds with Nick over how they both know how it feels to be manipulated and used by Caleb.

Also it takes a long time before he’s able to trust him, but he does get adopted into the Molina clan by Ray.

Ray reminds him a lot of his own dad, once Willie’s able to see that he’s nothing like Caleb.

Ray’s honestly just 100% happy to Dad™️ anyone who needs a dad so it works out great once Julie and the boys figure out how to make Willie visible.

But anyway back to important stuff.

Now that they don’t have to hide for any reason, Willie and Alex can both breathe a little easier. Or... they both feel better. Ghosts don’t really breathe.

Willie can finally let himself get used to feeling alive again.

The whole ghost gang goes (invisibly) to the Los Feliz Homecoming dance and maybe it should make him feel a little on-edge with the kind of club-like environment but...

He’s got Alex there, and they’re dancing to some corny pop love song from the 90s that Flynn probably put on because she knew the ghost boys would be there so how could he feel anything but safe?

For a minute it almost feels like actually being alive and there’s yellow and pink and blue lights coming from everywhere reflecting in Alex’s eyes and Willie is suddenly very aware of the fact that though they’ve been together for a long time now, they haven’t had their first kiss.

Then the Cha Cha Slide starts up and the atmosphere switches and Willie totally forgets about the whole romantic tension thing because it’s the Cha Cha Slide everybody has to dance along.

Dirty Candi performs towards the end of the night and the ghost boys cheer the loudest despite how Julie’s laughing at them. They don’t care that Carrie can’t even hear them, they’re being supportive!!!

Everybody screams even louder when Flynn runs up on stage and kisses Carrie and Willie feels a big burst of affection at how Alex shouts ABOUT TIME!

Then he gives Willie a quick hug and leaves cause he and the rest of Julie and the Phantoms have to go get set up for their performance.

Since Alex was able to flip Carrie’s hair in All Eyes on Me I’m saying that ghosts can touch lifers if they focus and believe it will happen hard enough, so the ghost gang has developed a system for alerting their non-Julie lifer friends to their presence.

So while they’re waiting in the crowd Willie taps Carrie on the shoulder like: • - - one short tap, two long taps, a Morse code ‘W’ and Carrie lets Flynn know that he’s there.

(Nick can see him too but Nick’s off somewhere with his date {one of his lacrosse teammates you know the one})

Anyway so Julie goes out and starts up the song and then the rest of the band poofs in but

Something’s unusual.

Cause it’s not Luke on the lower main vocals.

It’s

Alex

Singing while he plays the drums and fucking killing it.

Willie totally bluescreens for a second but then when he actually focuses on the lyrics...

It’s a new song about beating the odds and being with the person you love in spite of the challenges that come with them.

And yeah there are Julie elements in there, (and she’s definitely making heart eyes at Luke even as he sticks to backup vocals) because of course there are since she has to start the song up, but

But Willie might not have any formal music training, but he was at the HGC long enough to know his stuff about music and recognize different artists’ styles.

And there’s a time signature switch on the bridge that’s a little off from how Luke would write it. There’s a swing to the melody that’s a bit more ‘pop’ than the band’s usual songs. Julie’s harmony doesn’t go as high as it normally would, as if whoever wrote the song didn’t have as high of an upper range to work with as she does.

The song is so unmistakably Alex that no one else could have written it.

Flynn and Carrie are quietly making smug comments on what they bet his face looks like right now but Willie’s not listening to them.

On the last chorus, Alex fucking winks at him right before poofing out.

Willie has whiplash like how did they go from him having to psych Alex up to break into a museum even when there’s zero chance of getting caught to Alex openly flirting with him from the stage?

He poofs backstage right as the boys get back from dropping their instruments back in the Molinas’ garage and he honestly doesn’t know what he even wants to say to convey how amazing that performance was.

Then Alex just smiles at him.

Alex: So I take it you liked the song?

Willie: Can I kiss you right now?

They both kinda freeze after he blurts that out and Reggie goes wow really quietly before he and Luke poof out to give them some privacy and whoops now they’re both flustered but

Alex: Wow, didn’t expect that. That’s... um, wow. But yeah.

They kiss and it’s a total romcom moment.

And the story’s far from over, but to Willie this definitely feels like happily ever after.

[effervescentslut]

being biggs darklighter’s younger sister and dating luke skywalker headcanons

Requested: Yes

Pairing: Luke Skywalker x Fem!Darklighter!Reader

Category: Fluff, lil bit of angst

Content Warnings: Character death, Star Wars Universe curse words

ever since you were younger, your parents forced biggs to let you tag along with him

wherever biggs goes, you had to go too lmfao

i mean, what CAN you do on tatooine anyways???

so since you were with big brother biggs all the time, characteristically living up to the annoying little sister title, that also meant you were around luke skywalker all the time

tbh biggs didn’t even mind you that much

you three hung out  a l l  t h e  t i m e

the moment you met luke, you two just clicked

you were always fond of him; he had a soft spot for you

after all, you were his best friend’s little sister

but as you grew older it obviously blossomed into something more

he would always be so kind to you

even when biggs was annoyed that you were butting in on guy time™

you would always be the designated lookout for biggs and luke if they were engaging in reckless activities

though if they DID get caught, you’d always make sure that biggs was the one who got in trouble instead of luke <33

you watched them when they flew t-16 skyhoppers for the first time

mmmmm a man who can fly 

luke asked if you were interested in learning how to fly, but you turned down the opportunity

“if maker wanted me to fly, he would’ve given me wings”

he laughs, tossing his head back as light-hearted chuckles escape his lips

big brother biggs is secretly watching you two talk

and in that moment he knows that you’re crushing on his best bud

big time.

he always kinda knew but NOW it was certain. it was written in the stars across the galaxy

and he could tell that luke shared those feelings

he was chill with it so EHHH whatever

but you and luke didn’t know that biggs knew

ffs you two didn’t even know that these feelings are even mutually romantic  S I G H  naive teenagers

you’re afraid to confess to luke because not only is he your brother’s best friend, but he’s yours too

you two share a close bond, a different kind of bond than that of luke and biggs (obviously)

you keep him grounded

you’re his constant :’)

if it weren’t for uncle owen, luke would’ve been star systems away from tatooine at this point

it’s selfish, but you can’t help wanting luke to stay in this desert-ridden bane with you

you can’t risk losing your best friend by changing the gravity of your friendship

soooo you bottle your feelings up and keep them to yourself

luke is a very lowkey person when it comes to his romantic feelings

he downplays how he feels about you so he doesn’t put himself in a vulnerable position

his emotions tend to show through so he pretends like everything’s normal and hopes that no one will suspect a thing

biggs leaves to join the empire

you think, oh this is my chance! i can finally tell luke how i feel about him after all these years!

N O P E

owen and beru die, and luke just . . . disappears

maybe he finally left tatooine for good

without you

time passes slowly

biggs defects from the empire and joins the rebel alliance

so you’re like, oh, what the kriff, i’ll join him

you hope that joining the rebellion would give your life some direction, while also fighting for the greater good

you arrive to the base on yavin in a rather uncompromising time . . .

right before THE KRIFFING BATTLE OF YAVIN

. . . and you see big brother biggs talking to none other than luke skywalker

you run up to them and you guys exchange some brief words before luke and biggs hop into their respective x-wings

biggs hugs you and tells you both that they can all catch up later

it’s a little while later and luke comes back

he tells you that biggs’ x-wing was blasted and that he didn’t make it

“y/n, i’m so sorry . . .”

“we were all gonna be together again, luke. just like how we used to be . . .”

luke wraps his arms around you as you grip his orange flight and cry into his chest

he rests his head on top of yours and softly rakes his fingers through your hair to soothe you

the next morning, han solo and luke are awarded medals of bravery by princess leia organa for destroying the death star during yesterday’s battle

when the ceremony ends, the base immediately calls for an emergency evacuation to avoid another encounter with the empire

you rush towards luke and your bodies collide in a hug full of adrenaline and fear

but THEN

he pulls back and grabs your face with his hands

and crashes his lips to yours

he kisses you HARD

you both poured every bit of passion and love into your molding lips to make up for what should have been done years ago

after not seeing him for so much time, you wanted to be with him 24/7

even if it meant going on dangerous missions for the rebellion

he protests against you accompanying him on missions; he’s too scared to lose you too

leia would often convince you to stay behind and just work with him through the comms

after biggs’ death, you were even more terrified of travel by flying

luke eased you into it, but you still thought it was dangerous

maybe staying with leia wasn’t so bad after all

you always support luke in anything he does

luke, luke, he’s our man, if he can’t do it, no one can!!!

you loved watching him manipulate the force

leia would mentor you in military and politics, you yearned to avenge your brother and win the war for him

late night talks with luke about your future together after the war

“maker, please tell me we’re not going back to tatooine”

“haha, we can go anywhere you want in the galaxy, y/n”

*snuggles closer*

luke does lowkey forms of pda; hands brushing together, always being side-by-side

he’s so kind and gentle to you

he’s a softie <33

however he’s still pretty reckless at heart so you make sure to ream him out if he ever gives you a scare

leia will GO OFF on him too

han always teasing you and luke when you’re together

leia proceeding to kick han

luke’s hand around your lower back subconsciously tightens

han laughs even harder when he notices the blood rushing to luke’s cheeks

luke scoffs and leads you two away

you guys find a place on base to make out

[inadaydream99]

um... is req rlly open? if so, can i drop one for either hak/chanhee (you can choose ^^ tbh I'm in a crisis between both 😳) and if I could choose a genre, probably angst with a FLUFFY ending(?) srry, it sounds cliche but I love for those kinda things.

Hey, thank you for sending in a request! I thought I could use both Chanhee and Haknyeon in this oneshot so I really hope you like it! 😁

Accidentally Confessed

“You what?” You stand dumbstruck in the middle of the room. All eyes on you, including Chanhee’s guilt stricken ones.

“But I didn’t mean to...” He desperately tries to reason, but to no use. He went behind your back, betrayed your trust. “Come on (Y/N), please stay. I said I was sorry.” He chases after you as you angrily grab your bag and storm off.

“No Chanhee, you betrayed me. My own best friend told everyone the one secret I trusted no one else with!” Your voice comes out hoarse, throat tight from using all its strength to hold back your tears.

“I didn’t mean to though!” He calls after you but gives up when you slam the door in his face.

“Don’t worry, I’m sure you can fix it.” Younghoon approaches Chanhee from behind, comfortingly placing his hand on his friends slumped shoulder.

“Yeah, by tomorrow you’ll be best friends again I’m sure.” Hyunjae joins, trying to pick up the mood.

“No, I think I’ve really messed up this time.” Chanhee mumbles before dragging himself away, wanting nothing more than to hibernate and wallow in his regrets.

~

It’s been three days since your so called friend blurted your secret and you’re arguably even more enraged than before. The more you think about the situation the more hurt you feel.

You’d told Chanhee about your crush on Haknyeon in confidence. You even made him promise to never tell anyone. But I guess promises don’t mean to same to everyone.

“Come on (Y/N), please talk to me.” Chanhee whines as he follows you like a lost puppy. He’s been doing this all day, relentlessly pleaing for you to stop ignoring him. But you’re still so hurt you can’t even begin to think about forgiveness.

The only reason you were even in the same room as him is because you’d come over to visit the rest of the guys. Kevin had invited you over to hang out in hopes that you could amend things with Chanhee. But he was very wrong.

“Hey Kevin, you want a soda?” You causally offer as you open the refrigerator in search of an iced drink.

“Sure, thanks.” He smiles back at you before resuming his previous activity of scrolling through his social media.

“What about me? I want a soda...” Chanhee desperately continues his attempts at getting your attention.

“Whatcha looking at?” You blatantly ignore Chanhee, walking right past him to reach Kevin and hand him his drink.

“Oh, just some news. I’m trying to find some article that Haknyeon told me about.” Kevin beams towards you, nodding his head in thanks as you place the can down in front of him.

You try to hold back your faltering smile at the mention of Haknyeon, but Kevin still picks up on the uncomfortable laugh that emits from you in responce. It’s a sore topic, but you haven’t heard from him since your secret came out and you’re guessing it’s a sign he doesn’t reciprocate your feelings.

“You know he is here... if you wanna talk to him about it.” You’re snapped out of your thoughts by Kevin’s suggestion. He’s giving you that look that tells you he knows what’s troubling you.

“Even if I wanted to...” You raise your voice a little as you cast a quick glance over to Chanhee as he is sat at the opposite end of the table looking sulky. “I don’t think it’s the best idea.” You continue, letting out a deflated sigh at the end, turning back to face Kevin.

“Well, you never know.” He sympathises. That’s one of the things about Kevin that you love, he’s always so understanding towards everyone. It’s what always makes you want to seek him out when you need advice or comforting.

“Thanks.” You mutter gratefully before deciding that maybe you should be brave and face the possibility of rejection. No point letting fear control your life, right?

~

“Oh hey (Y/N)!” Eric greets you, ever the bubbly excitable person he is. “Guys, (Y/N)’s here!” He briefly turns to inform everyone of your presence.

“Hey Eric, is Haknyeon here? Kinda need to talk...” You awakwardly trail off. Truth be told you’re unsure of whether you really want to go through with this, but it’s going to happen at some point right? Better to get it over and done with that to let things go on for too long.

“Oh yeah, he’s just over the back.” You peak over to where Eric is pointing to spot Haknyeon laughing as he watches Hyunjae and Sunwoo battle against each other on whatever video game they’re playing.

“Right, thanks.” You take a deep breath, straightening out your posture before entering the darkened room. You feel Eric pat your back in encouragement, smiling at you knowingly.

“Um Haknyeon?” Your greeting comes out more as a question as you approach said boy.

He doesn’t hear you at first, the room being filled with so much commotion coming from the sounds of the tv and the shouting that ensues.

“Haknyeon?” You try again, this time speaking up a bit louder in an attempt to be heard over the noise.

“Go left!” He shouts, clearly completely immersed in cheering Sunwoo on. The room eruptes into cheers when Sunwoo wins, Haknyeon standing up out of his seat and jumping on the spot in celebration.

“Did you see that? Incredible!” He turns to you, placing both of his hands on your shoulders and shaking you lightly as he continues to celebrate.

“Can we talk?” You ask through a burst of giggles, his excitement making you feel more at ease.

“Oh yeah, of course.” Haknyeon chirps. “Is out here ok?” He asks as he makes his way out of the room, in the direction of his shared bedroom, with you following his lead.

~

“So, what is it you want to talk about?” He causally asks, giving you his full attention and waiting with a warm smile.

“I just wanted to address the whole crush thing that happened the other day.” You selfconsciously answer, eyes looking anywhere other than directly at Haknyeon.

“Oh right, you know I wasn’t actually sure if Chanhee had made that up or not.” Haknyeon lightly laughs, which makes you relax a little. It’s good to know that it hasn’t made him feel awkward around you.

“Well, he wasn’t exactly— I mean, he was kinda—” you stumble over your words, not sure of the best way to tell him.

“I like you too.” You freeze when you hear Haknyeon’s confession, completely caught off guard as you never expected him to say that. “I mean, the only reason I never said anything sooner is cause I was unsure if it was really the truth.” He continues, his smile growing wider when you fall shy from how flustered he’s making you, your gaze fixated on the floor and your hands fidgeting together as you fail to hide your smile.

“But I haven’t said if Chanhee was telling the truth or not.” You play coy when Haknyeon tilts your chin up gently so you meet his fond gaze. You wanted to come off all blasé and cool, but your game is given away when Haknyeon hears your breath hitch from realising the close proximity between your faces.

“Is that so?” He lightheartedly jokes, not phased in the slightest by your statement; the fact your face is a bright red gives everything away.

By this point you’ve lost the ability to respond, so focused on the way he gazes at you with such intense affection. You’ve been rendered speechless.

“Maybe...” you whisper, breaking out into a smirk to reciprocate Haknyeon’s.

“Well then, I guess that means you won’t want me to kiss you.” He pulls away, throwing his head back in laughter when you protest, your hands clinging onto his arms to keep him close.

“I never said that.” You pout, giggling when Haknyeon draws you in close and connects his lips with yours.

~

“So, when are you gonna tell Chanhee that you’re not mad at him anymore?” Haknyeon leans in next to you discretely.

“I know I should, but this is kinda fun.” You chuckle back, regaining your composure and hiding your amused expression when Chanhee bursts into the room.

“Ok, I’ve got your favourite drinks and snacks here. I even had to go to three different places to find the right flavour of chips, so please can you forgive me. I promise to never spill any of your secrets ever again!” Chanhee hurriedly lays everything out on the table in front of you while pleading for you to stop ignoring him.

You share a knowing glance with Haknyeon before letting the grin you’ve been holding back grow on your face.

“You’re forgiven.” You beam. “But! If you ever blurt one of my secrets again there’ll be no second chance.” You caution, laughing when Chanhee rushes over to you and squashes you in the tightest embrace possible.

As he pulls away from the hug he notices your hand interlaced with Haknyeon’s, sending you a sly look and you instantly clock onto the fact he’s noticed.

“You know, I think I’m gonna take some of these snacks for myself as a thank you... cause you know, without me you would have never confessed.” Chanhee cheekily smirks, slowly backing towards the table before quickly snatching away some of the food and rushing out of the room.

[anotherbeingsworld]

Start Again

Pairing: Bryce x F!MC (Casey Valentine)

Word Count: 1582

A/n: Hi everyone!! I am back for a new fic, and its a fluffy goodness! This is one of my fav tropes to write, and I hope all of you enjoyed it! I have been through a few stuff lately and its pretty insane tbh, but... I am doing good now (hopefully! I had amazing people here that has been there for me and this fic is dedicated to all of you amazing people!) I also have a new fic coming on later today, but... its not a Bryce fic (I am so sorry!) It’s a new pairing I am working on, and its pretty exciting!! Thank you for all the support as taking the time to read my stories. It means a lot, and I adore each and everyone of you. Enjoy! 

PS- This is my take on this, and I hope it would go well! I dont own any of the characters except the storyline!

Tags:  Tags:  @bitchloveskcbaseball​​ ​​ , @storyofmychoices​​ ​​ , @jaxsmutsuo​​ ​​ , @mvalentine​​ ​​ , @princess-geek​ ​​ , @lahellacute​​ ​​​ , @kacie-0156​​ ​​​ , @simp-for-villains​​ ​​​ , @annekebbphotography​​ ​​​ , @brycelahel​​ ​​​ , @mrsbhandari​​ ​​​ , @dcbbw​​ ​​​ , @choicessa​ ​​​ , @choices-confessions​ ​ , @aylamwrites​ ​​ , @fantasyoverreality98​ ​, @drakewalker04​​ , @baltersome​​ , @thecordoniandiaries​​ , @thundergom​​ @choicesficwriterscreations​

LINK TO MY MASTERLIST

---------------------

In our lifetimes, people would always come and go. But, sometimes… fate brought them back into our lives once more as a chance to start over. It was the best decisions one could ever made.

It was the first day of grade school, as one Bryce Lahela is starting his first year of school. He anxiously made his way to his assigned class, where a woman is already started her lesson for the day.

He gulps slowly stopping himself behind the door, feeling terrified of what is happening on the other side of the door. After a few moments of panicking, he felt someone tap his shoulder. A girl. A very beautiful girl, she looks concerned at him.

‘Hi, are you lost?’ Her voice soft making his heart happy, as she is friendly.

He shook his head,

‘I am scared.’

She looks at him in sadness, before she steps forward and held his hand inside of hers. Bryce was speechless as the girl said.

‘I am here for you.’ Before both of them made their entrance into the class.

They had fun together, until… one day, the mystery girl didn’t come to school for a few days. He felt sad about it, as she is the first real friend he ever had.

‘Miss Ally, where is she?’ He asked suddenly as the school day is finally done.

Miss Ally looked at Bryce with a sad expression on her face, making him nervous. His mind has made up that it's really bad if a person is sad.

‘I’m sorry sweetie, our friend had left for another state yesterday. Her parents told me that they are moving somewhere new.’ Miss Ally said as he flinches over the pang of sadness that is inside of him

Bryce lowered his head to avoid her seeing my sad expression. Mom always said boys don't cry, but…in that moment nothing matters more except the fact that he lost a friend. From that day on, the memory of her fades away in his mind as Bryce Lahela grows up.

Somehow, that smile is still there in his consciousness. It is telling him to not lose hope, as her other features had left my memory  long ago.

-------------------------------------------

Bryce woke up to the alarm, as it shows its already 5 in the morning. It was his first day as a surgical intern at Edenbrook Hospital. He took a shower, as he gets himself prep for the day.

The commute was short, as Bryce is filled with excitement on finally starting his residency after all these years in medical school. He arrived at the hospital quite early, as he decides on a short breakfast break before changing into his surgical scrubs. He decides on a pastry, and a cup of coffee to go. His walk to the locker room was short, as it was filled with wide-eyed interns who are on the same page as he is. Its either internal or surgical, but… he decided on the surgical route years ago, as he has the need and talent for fixing things, physical or even invisible pain.

Whilst changing, his mind wandered over to the mysterious smiled he saw years ago. The memory still vividly stood in his mind, as she was the first friend he ever had. The first person who genuinely cares for him. It was a cliché but he didn’t mind at all.

As he was taking his time to change, he heard a yelp coming from the opposite direction.  The mysterious yelp caught his attention, as Jackie is talking to that particular person. He walked towards the direction, and his eyes went wide for a few seconds. It couldn’t be, could it?

-----------------

She felt herself getting redder at the sight of a woman in her bra, she covered her eyes slowly moving away whilst the girl lets out a laugh. She opened her eyes again to be met with a man, who… looks familiar to her. Somewhere in her mind, she felt like…she knew that person. At the sight of his eyes widen, as the realization hits her like a brick. It was him.

Jackie’s head perks up at the situation, as the two interns were silent for a whole minute. She clears her throat bringing both of them back to reality as Bryce quickly slips into his scrub top before leaving the room. She was brought back to reality as Jackie placed her hand on her shoulder, giving her a comforting squeeze before they head back to the atrium.

The day went by as she tries to search for Bryce again, her eyes darted every inch of the atrium. But, her luck runs out. She lets out a sigh as she continues her first day as an intern. Her day went by pretty slow, as she gets herself chewed a couple of times by the one and only, Dr. Ethan Ramsey. Somehow, walking into the hospital; her confidence was high. But, now… she felt like, she wanted to disappear and save herself from the amount of humiliation she had today.

After rounds were over, she makes her way into a nearby supply closet. Her years at medical school didn’t prepare her for the hard reality of crying on her first day as an intern. She has been strong her whole life, either it's leaving her best friend at the time to standing up for herself in school. But, right now… the feeling is gone. She was there, hopeless. She wondered to herself if she is cut out for this.

---------------

Bryce is walking down the hallway, as his mind wandered to the mysterious girl. That face, he recognized that face anywhere. His mind was bothered as he tries to remember the smallest detail about her from decades ago. But, the thought was interrupted as he heard sniffles coming from the supply closet. His mind is a wonder and its calling for him to check on what’s behind the door.

He twists the doorknob slowly, as he made his way into the dim room. His eyes went wide once more at the sight of her, he stood there in disbelief before propping down a seat on the cold floors. Bryce took a piece of gauze from the cabinet and lend it to her way as she stopped herself from crying. Her green eyes are looking directly at him, and he smiled. Those were the same eyes he saw years ago, and he knows that he finally found her after all these years.

‘What brings you here?’ His voice is soft as she took a deep breath in an attempt to calm herself down.

‘I needed a time-out from the real world, and honestly… this felt like the right place for it.’ She gestures in the darkroom, as she tries to keep her head up. Bryce nods in agreement as his eyes followed her gaze into the room which is filled with supplies that he came to be familiar with it.

‘The real world is a mess, and… I won’t blame you for it.’ Bryce stifles out a laugh making her smile as they fall into a comfortable silence.

Bryce clears his throat as he decides to lay out the question that happens to be a playing in his mind.

‘It’s you, right?’ His voice was low, as he tried to not get his hopes up too much.

She looked at him, as a smile appeared before nodding to him.

‘Yes, it’s me. I remember you after we left I did try to find you. At the time, my dad forced us to move since there were a family emergency and all.’ She frowns at the sentence.

Bryce nods in understanding,

‘I never got to say thank you.’

She raised an eyebrow at the statement, curious on what occasion was the thanks needed for.

‘You helped me back then when I was a scared kid. That means a lot to me.’ Bryce stated, with a hint of softness in his eyes.

She’s speechless, her mother always told her to be kind to other people because some as little as that can give a huge meaning in a stranger’s life. Growing up, she never understood what it meant entirely. But, hearing those words from Bryce’s mouth. It felt amazing, as the littlest things in life can play a huge role.

She didn’t know what came over her, as she pulled him into a sudden embrace. Letting the sadness in her rolled from her back, somehow… the hug felt like walking into a home where she felt like she belongs. Bryce was taken aback by it but didn’t pull away either. They stood like that for a while, before pulling away.

At that moment, she smiled. Her real smile and he knows; he is falling for her slowly. The smile on her face shows the happiness in her, finally seeing him again after all these years. It felt right, as her heart is also, beating for him slowly. In the end, they knew… their love for each other from that day  is growing slowly, and all at once. Somehow it felt like they were kids again, as the memories started to flood by once more, clearer than ever.

-------------------

‘Let’s start again shall we, for old times sakes?’ She suggests as Bryce lets of a small laugh before nodding in agreement.

‘Hi, I am Bryce Lahela.’

‘And, I am Casey Valentine.’

And the rest of their lives were history.

THE END.

[cmescapade]

my long overview/review of ‘Star Wars: Journey to Batuu’ after forcing myself to play it almost nonstop

so i said i was going to amend what i said in response to this ask after playing to min/max shit so here is a tldr version of my opinion after playing:

I consider this pack to be a 2/10; It's enough to kill time as a temporary distraction, but not for long. There’s absolutely no replay value after going through all those missions as each outcome is ultimately the same by faction. There also doesn’t seem to be any negative outcomes for each prompt in the little “choose your adventure” pop ups--And if there is, it is extremely low since I have never gotten a negative outcome. 

The aspirations are fair, and are the only things I found in this pack that’s anyway redeemable since I believe the rewards can be used well in conjunction with general solo/super-sim gameplay.

kinda sat on this for a while bc i wasn’t sure if i should post something so lengthy but then i remembered this is my blog n i can post my left toe if i wanted to

even tho i would never post a pic of my left toe anyway

.......at least for free. With the right price, however....

anyway more details under the cut if you’re interested bc i like to ramble :))

I decided to split this into 5 sections to organize my thoughts a little better. I’ll be separating my thoughts on each faction, the ships as a rabbit hole, the faction missions, the star wars aspirations, and then the breakdown of my 2/10 rating. 

1. Factions

When you travel to Batuu, the game gives you a starting “mission” or quest to get you acclimated to the areas, and each area has a specific Faction associated with it.

And yes, you cannot live anywhere, nor are there any lots, as was already stated.

Every area has a similar makeup which has:

Control Panels

Supply Crates

1 non-rabbit hole area

1 interactable ship

The Black Spire Outpost is the biggest area and has:

Two places to grab food, three if you count the Cantina

Aside from the Cantina, the other areas are rabbit holes

The two eateries are:

Docking Bay 7

this one has the most food options

you’ll never go hungry in batuu because the cheapest items on the menu are Outpost Popcorn Mix and Water at 0 credits lmao

the other two foods not shown in the screenshot above are Yobshrimp Noodle Salad and Braised Shaak Roast

Ronto Roasters

This food place has two of the same options Docking Bay 7 has as well as two additional food items

Oga’s Cantina

The only area that you see the inside of

yea the bar serves batuu-only drinks too

also where you find the guy who would give you Scoundrel missions, Hondo Ohnaka.

You can essentially max your Scoundrel reputation without it hindering whichever side you wanna take, and you can keep it when you essentially max out your rep on either the Resistance or the First Order.

There aren’t any real pros to being a Scoundrel aside from some socialization interactions. It doesn’t do anything for initial Batuu gameplay aside from unlocking Scoundrel outfits in CAS and some upgrades for your droids, but this goes for all of your options (Resistance, First Order, & Scoundrel).

The Dwelling

This is a rabbit hole where your sim goes to sleep, pee, or shower… If not the closest bench. 

It’s located opposite to the Cantina. 

If you’re ever lost, there’s a spire you can sit/nap on right in front of it–or you can just wait till your sim wants to pee. 

they’ll automatically run there 

that’s… how i found it, tbh

Dok Ondar’s Den of Antiquities

Another rabbithole

This place sells items you can use to complete missions, like Dataspikes and a couple of Lightsaber parts

Majority of the inventory are decorative stuff to bring back with you

Savi’s Workshop

Right behind the antique shop is the lightsaber place where you can find more hilts, kyber crystals, and display cases for your lightsabers.

You can also click on the shop to start a lightsaber challenge.

Outside this area, you have the First Order District which has more supply crates and control panels than the other two neighborhoods, and a lot more activity–Makes sense since this is basically the hub for the First Order in general. 

There’s only the Droid Depot in this area, and the only real shop that has use for credits. Food wise, there’s a food stall, and if your sim is stinky or tired, they’d basically disappear for a few minutes to recharge and come back. 

Droid Depot

Each faction has specific Droid personality traits

Aside from “voices,” these personalities don’t do much

I guess the First Order one is a lot more zap-happy though

The Resistance Camp is even smaller. Like the other areas, it’s littered with supply crates, but only has one control panel and no shops. However, there’s a rabbit hole toward the back in the Caves.

This doesn’t lead you to anywhere interesting, and it’s just another ‘choose your own adventure’ kind of thing. 

2. Ships

In the Black Spire Outpost, you’ll find the iconic Millennium Falcon. You can do kessel runs and explore in the Millennium Falcon with Chewbacca if you have a high Scoundrel reputation. 

However, although I said you get to ride with Chewbacca, you don’t ever see him come out 

He just kinda……………..stays there

and the prompts tell u he’s there

n ur gonna have to go with it and use the power of your imagination to believe he really do be there

In the First Order District, there’s the TIE Echelon, which functions the same way as the Millennium Falcon… But, you can’t do anything outside of exploring or using it for missions. This is how the X-Wing Starfighter in the Resistance Camp functions as well. 

It’s all pretty copy and paste, but w/e, that’s how EA does it  

 ¯\_(ツ)_/¯

3. Missions

There may be several different missions per faction, but to no one’s surprise, they’re all literally the same one but worded differently.

Regular missions only have one plus (+) and one negative (-) icon

Regular Scoundrel missions only have one plus icon and no negatives since they don’t impact other factions

Each faction has a regular mission that pertains to:

Obtaining information

Exploring with the faction’s designated ship

Stealing from Supply Crates

Hacking a Control Panel

Yes………………….They’re very repetitive

You don’t have to do all of them though

You can spam the same one over and over as long as it fits the time slot

For example, the Resistance’s ship exploration mission is limited to only the day time and seems to disappear when it gets late in game

also there’s an error with the TIE Echelon where it’s missing a whole ass prompt

……As you can see, the options make no sense because the prompt is the same one that came before it 🥴

anyway…

Story Missions are the only missions that seem to differentiate from each faction.

All missions that pertain to the “story” are indicated with prerequisites of higher ranks within the faction

All of them give a double boost toward your faction

If it’s a Resistance story quest, it’ll always increase hostility from First Order members

Vice versa for the First Order faction

The Scoundrels are neutral, and do not impact any faction 

It’s only the Resistance and First Order factions that have very similar plot lines

but I’m guessing it’s only like that since they’re supposed to follow the vague cause/effect the two of them have?

4. Aspirations

The initial Aspiration you get when you pick the Star Wars umbrella in CAS (or in game) is “Hope VS Order.” After completing this one aspiration, you unlock the 3 that pertain to each faction.

Paragon of Hope

Resistance aspiration

Reward trait gives a boost to Charisma skill building

This is probably nice for those careers that need Charisma to be high, like the Political and Business branches

Enforcer of Order

First Order aspiration

Lowers chances of “Death from Anger”

Since I like killing my sims, I think this aspiration is pointless lmao

Galactic Privateer

Scoundrel aspiration

“Sleight of Hand” reward trait

Unlocks pickpocketing outside of Criminal branch usage

Best one here tbh

Works outside of Batuu, you’ll steal simoleons instead of credits

Also you can cheat whenever u play Sabaac and no one will notice

5. Reevaluation of Initial Opinions

I’ll be going through my initial list from my Response to the Ask I got before. I originally stated that it seemed promising and it was a 3.5~4/10.

Aesthetics/Visual: my opinion is unchanged, it still made me sad i can’t have a little shanty house out there or rent a garbo lot, 0.5/5

The longer I played, the more I didn’t find any new animations

The lightsaber sparring slowly began to look like a mash between GF and RoM duels after a while

I still hate that the areas were beautiful (+0.5) but the interactive places forced cutaway

why do you wanna ruin my screenshots like this, man

CAS/BB still is hard to integrate–Unless your sim is a geek with figurines, the ship models might be nice to add to their collections

Otherwise……

….

I don’t have a follow up for that, sry

Gameplay: uhhh at least i found something i could use outside of Batuu, 1.5/5

I think that playing 3984729847 repetitive missions for a long period time really orientated me to the whole map

…but the fact that i had trouble the first time around still makes it not-user friendly

the issue I had with the resistance members not having an icon? It’s a thing, I guess

The resistance quests take you on a weird trip to “prove” yourself so i guess the icons are supposed to show that they’re “not” resistance members or something idk

they’re supposed to be the sneaky underdogs who wanna do good or w/e

I guess that’s immersive…….. +0.5

sry im first order trash

they also have “Ignite the Spark” and “Ask about Missions” both leading to the same mission screen……………….

convenience?? i guess??

missions are still confusing, made worse when the game itself glitches up a storm

there was one mission where i had to go to the cantina to find someone

and they wouldn’t spawn within the time frame………….

i had to go in and out for like 3 days until they actually spawned

i only knew this bc i arrested half the people in the cantina while i was bored

so anyone without a red bar was probably them lmfaoo

also, as i stated above……. there’s some mission errors in the prompts 

Currency is still worthless.

Everything can be done by purely stealing from supply crates

Credits are only worth to blow it off on sabaac! 

The only real need for credits is to have 1,000 so u can buy a droid

Then slam the rest of those credits on the table to bet bajillions on a game of sabaac!

Aspirations………. Useful +1

Despite them being sorta niche, they’re pretty decent

Can abuse the rewards for optimal gameplay for a super sim

Honestly i just love the pickpocketing reward off the Scoundrel aspiration, just because it works outside of Batuu (and that he didn’t have to be in the Criminal career for it either)

In total, my personal rating for this pack is 2/10.

It was nice, but I don’t really see this pack being replayable, considering that i did everything there was to do on Batuu in a single trip. Sure I could’ve taken my time, but since everything would end up the same anyway, it felt like it was set up to be a one-time gig. 

At least with JA you’re moderately forced to return so you can collect treasures that are RNG–In JtB, you can snatch up all that you need on Batuu from grinding everything like a nutcase. There’s also chances of failure in JA, but on Batuu that percentage is almost little to none. The most you’ll ever get is a dazed moodlet that barely lasts, a negative relationship, and being escorted to a loading screen.  

I feel like this pack could be a little better if there were more risks involved, but there are barely any that I encountered. It’s just another weird, rehashed cash grab by EA.

[hardkinkbadkink]

Can’t remember if i sent this earlier but I loved the milking and overstimulation fic!!! What if Geralt accidentally(or rather purposely) overdosed Jaskier to a point where he produces sooo much come it’s painful and Geralt has to actually milk him properly in fear of his balls actually exploding or his cock just leaking constantly for the next days at it’s pushed out of his testicles slowly from the backed up spunk. It takes the entire night and he only discovers how genuinely backed up the (1)

the bard is when it actually starts dripping out of his urethra, Jaskier sobbing from humiliation through it all. Preferably in a verse where the original fic didn’t happen.

hnghh this was fucking Fun tbh i have nothing more to say other than i enjoyed this prompt immensely

***

Geralt would like to think he's a man of reason.

And while it would be unreasonable to pass on a contract so lucrative, it would be equally unreasonable to botch it, when all he has to do is--

Well, what is it, if not a cautionary experiment?

The baroness' coin would keep them fed for months, and all for a small vial of a virility potion only a little more powerful than the ones bought at the apothecary.

Well. Threefold as powerful, if prepared correctly.

It's a dangerous game, Geralt knows. Human bodies are fickle--and death from a sore cock or burst bollocks is not preferable in the nobler circles. Or so it had been explained to him.

Good thing, then, that Geralt has a noble of his own to aid in perfecting the recipe.

Perhaps he should be concerned by how easily Jaskier takes the bottle when it's handed to him, or by the trust in his eyes when he swallows it in one go, without bothering to inquire about its contents. Gods, how did the bard manage to keep himself alive for so long?

Geralt mumbles something about a deathwish, but he's in no position to complain, really. He casts Axii, just to be safe; just so Jaskier doesn't disrupt the trial needlessly.

The potion's effects are more or less immediate.

Pliant and quiet, Jaskier lets him undo his trousers--a surprisingly sensible pair, thick grey wool with only a faint pattern--and take out his stiffening cock. He gives it a measured stroke. Calm. Methodical. Collected.

It takes Jaskier a while to come, and Geralt watches in fascination as his balls swell, grow taut and heavy and tempting when he reaches to cup them in his palm. He keeps a firm grip on Jaskier's cock, strokes him hard and fast, captivated by the sheer, naked want on the bard's face, even if his eyes remain blissfully absent.

Jaskier's body bows as he spends all over himself for a long, pleasing moment.

Geralt deems the volume of his release satisfactory and tucks his twitching cock back into his breeches.

***

"Geralt--"

Jaskier stops abruptly, though Geralt fills in the rest of the question.

"Drink less water," he says off-handedly as he slows Roach to a halt.

"Uh-huh."

Geralt watches his bard sprint between the trees.

It's not an issue of hydration, Geralt knows. Jaskier's been sneaking off every half-hour, limping slightly but in a rush to find some seclusion. He comes back lighter on his feet; flushed and dishevelled and smelling of spend.

The potion, it seems, lasts longer than Geralt anticipated.

It's a strange temptation that overcomes him, to deny Jaskier the privacy. Cite some non-specified dangers and make him walk beside Roach without a chance to sort out his body. For no reason other than his burning curiosity.

A strange temptation indeed, and one Geralt finds himself succumbing to, just a half-hour later.

"Stay," he growls when Jaskier makes to retreat.

It stops him in his tracks, one palm already--unconsciously--cupped around his crotch. Jaskier turns a bright pink and slowly pulls his hand back, as though to pretend it never was there.

"W--what? Geralt, I--"

"If you need a piss, do it here. I don't want you wandering the woods alone."

And Jaskier huffs his outrage, stutters on an insult. Walks, resigned, slower and slower until he's dragging his feet more than lifting them. Sweat beads on his temple.

Geralt takes pity on the man, eventually, though not completely.

"Don't walk anywhere," Geralt says when he'd near-finished setting up their camp beneath a thick canopy of leaves.

"But I need--"

He cocks an eyebrow and revels in the desperation written all over Jaskier's cute little face.

Jaskier squirms and shifts, unable to find a comfortable position on the rock he's occupying. His frustrated whimpers make Geralt want to pull his dick out, truth be told, but he stays still and unbothered, setting about sharpening his silver dagger just to have something to do.

A sharp gasp from Jaskier makes him whip his head around lightning-fast. And then he catches the scent.

It's not overwhelming, not like it would be if Jaskier spent in his breeches, but it's--

Intriguing.

Jaskier sits, frozen, shaking hands gripping his thighs, and the look on his face is in equal parts that of confusion and terror.

Geralt walks to him, urging himself to go slow and not pounce on the man like he so furiously wants to. He kneels next to Jaskier and watches, hypnotised, as a wet spot grows so very slowly at the front of his trousers.

His hands are suddenly too big, too clunky as he tries to slip the delicate buttons open. Jaskier doesn't move to stop him when Geralt pushes the breeches down, along with his wet smallclothes, and--

"Fuck."

Geralt's mouth waters at the display before him; Jaskier's soft prick resting against his thigh, spend leaking steadily from the tip, because there's so much it can't fit inside his body, gods, fuck.

"How does it feel?" he breathes. A muscle jumps in Jaskier's thigh.

"Hurts," Jaskier chokes out, sounding close to tears. "It all hurts, Geralt, I'm so full, please--"

He can't help staring as Jaskier's cock drools sluggishly, dripping more and more. It's the most erotic thing Geralt's ever seen.

He aims for gentle, when he pulls Jaskier's knees apart and slides between them. When he lifts Jaskier's prick up and away to expose his beautifully swollen balls, reddened and so deliciously close to bursting. Geralt touches them cautiously and shivers at Jaskier's throaty moan. His cock spurts out more come.

"I can't take it, I'm--please, Geralt, f-feels like I'm gonna explode--"

Geralt groans and dives in to mouth hungrily at the taut skin of Jaskier's sack. It's feverishly hot against his lips, smooth and perfect and he reaches to tug at Jaskier's cock, too desperate, too sloppy.

"Come on," Geralt says, voice rough with need, muffled in Jaskier's taint. "Come for me, Jaskier."

It's a heady sensation, feeling Jaskier's balls throb and empty, his seed getting all over Geralt's hand, wetting it copiously.

"Fuck, Geralt, Geralt--"

He doesn't stop stroking, the glide eased by Jaskier's release. He tries to fit one of the swollen balls into his mouth, finding them too big and tender still, judging by the way Jaskier whines above him.

Geralt moves to suck instead at the head of his prick, soaked in thick, unnaturally sweet spend, sensitive and pulsing against Geralt's tongue.

"'s too much, gods, Geralt--"

Except for him it's not enough, and he swallows greedily around the cock in his mouth, taking it deeper until his nose is buried in the tidy-trimmed hair at the base. Deeper, until he can slither the tip of his tongue down to lap at Jaskier's balls.

Jaskier tears at his hair, his fingers frantically digging into Geralt's scalp, but it only makes Geralt want it more, bob his head faster, drool cooling sticky on his chin.

When Jaskier spasms and spills down his throat, Geralt thinks he could come just from that.

Jaskier sways and nearly falls. Geralt grabs a fistful of doublet, keeps the bard upright and his mouth firmly around Jaskier's twitching cock.

"Please--Geralt, please," Jaskier whines, and Geralt ruts his hips into the air, craving friction.

It takes another trembling, writhing release before Geralt pulls away, half-delirious, drunk on the taste and the raw, scraped feeling in his throat.

Jaskier sobs, a wretched thing, and bats weakly at Geralt's forehead. He looks--fuck, Geralt's never seen him like this, face a splotchy red, glistening with tears, chest heaving. His prick can't stay hard anymore, but Geralt knows he's not done yet, even as he tries to squeeze his legs together.

"Stop, stop, gods, I--I can't go anymore, I can't." He sucks in a wet breath, bringing a careful hand to cover his softening cock.

It'd be easy to put Jaskier under Axii, get him off over and over until the potion's burned through--

It's also easy to yank Jaskier's doublet open, off, away; unbutton the ridiculous lacey shirt underneath; tangle Jaskier's hands behind his back, secure them in place with his own garment. And maybe Jaskier is too weak to break free, or maybe he doesn't really want to.

But he lets Geralt put his mouth back on that twitching, wet cock.

Geralt feels like he'd had a full meal by the time Jaskier screams his final release, breath seemingly stuck in his heaving lungs.

"Ge-eralt, 's--enough, please."

It's the despair in Jaskier's bright eyes as he says it--whines it, more like--that has Geralt pulling away and tucking him lovingly back into his trousers.

Jaskier collapses onto the bedroll and drifts into a deep, calm sleep, and Geralt brings himself off quickly and brutally, thinking about how much of the potion he can slip into Jaskier's waterskin.

[bangtansfavwriter]

🌷hobi having a crush on you 🌷

-hobi and you were inseparable, and when I say inseparable I mean it

-he introduced you to all of his friends and everyone knew you guys became a package deal

- he loooves spending time with you , which would already be a dead giveaway bc hobi's a really social guy, so him choosing to spend his time with you so often would already say a lot

-very playful and spontaneous, looots of laughter together

-you guys' favourite thing to do together would be karaoke and the two of you would put some singers to shame bc singing - check - dancing - audience wildin' and partying to you two - check bc the whole neighbourhood knew you by now and people would leave their own booth at the bar to come and watch you two (which would turn to spontaneous parties that would be absolutely legendary (and the place would be so packed that even dispatch would be like fuck no we ain't goin in))

-you'd come to watch bts' dance practices sometimes and just sit there and watch this completely different side of hobi come out

- he dances with such a passion that you can't do anything but watch him in awe, completely enthralled by the way he moves

-this was also something that made you fall for him slowly, you loved the fact that he was absolutely passionate about everything he does and puts his energy in

-and you admired him so much, bc he was still humble about his talent & also this innate ability to light up every room he walks in

- you almost felt like icarus trying to bask in the sun and sometimes felt like your feelings for him may get you too close and you would get hurt

-and whenever you would get into that mood, it would be hobi himself to snap you out of it, unknowingly

"hobi, there's no reason for me to come to the christmas party, you guys are like family, why would i be there?"

"nonsense, you're family, too. i want you to be there." ---and that's it, that's how he handled your moods, he always made you feel cherished and most importantly loved--

- he would play with your hair a lot and would be very touchy in general, the supreme method to shut down hobi.exe would be playing with his hair, he'd legit lay down and and go quiet, but chances are he's gonna fall asleep (and boy would he get cranky when you wake him up)

- he'd love to make you laugh and sing lil songs and do lil dances for you when you would make tea or something ("look it's y/n, making tea for mee, hobiii~, this sure looks like chamomile, chamomile is just my style, my legs are so sore, I'm gonna go lay on the floor..."*his voice fades* - "u ok there hobi?" - *weak* "no..") [btw chamomile tea helps with sore muscles ☺️]

- his spontaneous dances would be the best, he'd drop it to maluma and lowkey get emotional when you'd turn on some flamenco songs ("y/n, i should be a flamenco dancer, this music speaks to my soul" - "whatever you say, horacio" )

- he would sometimes give you very obvious signals:

"oh we're both wearing jean jackets, almost like a couple look hmmm~~~"

"you cooked for me ?? caring for me, like we're a couple hmmm~~~"

"look at us sharing our drinks like we're a couple hmmm~~~"

-and tbh, you guys would be the couple that has no idea that they're a couple bc you never truly established something along that lines

-but you truly liked him, after all, he's mr sunshine, with the most generous heart and boy's got the prettiest side profile you've ever seen (you knew you were whipped when you went for drinks with a friend and ended up being an emotional drunk who gushed about hobi's lil nose)

-hobi always gets shy when u praise him and you're like "BOI I CAN DO THIS ALL DAY LONG" and he'd go "noooo stop" and backflip to the other side of the room bc he got shy again but he secretly loves it (honestly, it would lift his entire mood, to a hyper extent.... one day you didn't have the time to stay for their dance practices and met hobi shortly before they started, to say bye and such, and you encouraged him to be strong, bc you knew how tough the new choreography was, and told him "you, horacio, dancing king of my heart, can do this, now go prove your title or I won't make you any pancakes for a week" and he SCREAMED in joy & spun you around like 3 times and sprinted to the practice room, you got one (1) single text from jin at 02.17 am, which you opened, confused at hell, it just said: "idk what you said to hobi before practice but you owe me a spa weekend for the muscle pain i have rn")

-but hobi is only human too, he also gets into low moods, which you help him through by simply not going anywhere even when he detaches himself from you and everyone else for that matter

-you knew he had to recharge and gave him some space without entirely distancing yourself from him ofc, you guys would still text tho from time to time

-you knew that he had practice again and one day you stopped by with some food you prepared for him and gave it to a staff member to pass it to hobi, bc you didn't want to intrude, and hobi would text you back a pic of the empty lunch boxes you packed for him with a caption like this: "👼🏻👼🏻👼🏻👼🏻💗💖💝💓💞💕🙇🏻‍♂️🙇🏻‍♂️🙇🏻‍♂️" (hobi talk for "you are and angeeeel, i loooove you & thank youuu") and you were happy with yourself and happy for hobi bc you knew this would cheer him up

-he came over to yours like 2 days later and your heart ached a little bc he was obviously exhausted but still shot you a smile when you opened the door

- you pulled him inside and hugged him, neither of you spoke a word, hobi just sighed and buried his face in your neck

- he came inside and you made tea for the two of you and prepared some snacks too and you caught him looking at you a few times, but his gaze was different... you couldn't quite pinpoint what it was and just thought that's it's probably just random and that he's tired, since he also didn't speak a lot that evening.. anyway you chilled in front of the tv and had a night in, which he gladly accepted because his legs were so sore he wasn't even sure if he could leave your place in first place

-so you spread out on one sofa, while hobi layed down on to the other one

-whenever you weren't looking, hobi stared at you with the most smitten look on his face, especially when you'd giggle about some scene in the movie you were watching, and unable to contain his feelings for himself, he'd flat out tell you:

"you know, if there wouldn't be a risk of me face-planting onto the floor, I'd be on that couch and kiss you"

- he couldn't quite tell if his words made your face go red or if it was bc of your near-death experience after choking on your nachos when korea's dancing king told u he wants to smooch

(-"you ok now ?"

"yeah, alive and kicking"

"good bc- don't eat that now- I have plans for us 👀"

"maybe I do too 👀👀"

" 👀👀👀")

however, you decided you should talk this out when both of you were less tired

- but you didn't... bc hobi was busy again

- days had passed and hobi didn't say a word which was really disheartening for you bc after that kiss-statement you really thought you would finally clarify what was going on between you two and talk about dating and stuff, so you mustered all your courage and texted him: "hey, i know ur busy and all, which is why im gonna keep it as short as possible.... hoseok, i wanna talk about what you said to me the other day and i know this could potentially change our friendship forever, but i liked you for a while now and I wanna now if you were just joking around back then or if u actually were serious"

-the next hours would be absolutely agonizing for you bc deep down you truly feared that this may ruin your friendship with him, but you needed clarity, even though it was really clear that he liked you, but you weren't sure how and asked yourself if you may have read too much into his actions and words.... you threw your phone on your bed and tried keeping yourself busy with something that would keep you from looking at your phone. you failed miserably tbh and you were contemplating deleting the text the entire time... "this is so stupid, I can't risk this..." you thought and were about to open the messenger to delete your text, when you saw that he texted back....: "you never call me hoseok" (you had to took deep breaths to calm yourself down or you would probably have stormed into bighit and throw your phone at him)

- you: "this is really all you have to say ???? "

and he texted back shortly after and you were like oohhh, im gonna grill jung hoseok now

him: "well you never call me hoseok, so I guess this is very serious to you"

you: "yeah NO SHIT sherlock, i confessed my feelings for you and this is how you answer me ?????

him: "im serious too, don't be like that!"

you: "well how tf should i know if you're serious or not??"

him: "you could open your door and find out"

-to use the word "dumbfounded" for how you felt the second you read that would be the understatement of the century, you threw your phone away and bolted to the door

-and there he was.. standing there and smiling at you as radiantly as ever

- he held a plush in one hand and playfully waved at you with the other the other, in which he was holding his phone. he gave you the plush and laughed at you bc you still were completely baffled, but you started laughing too

- you: mang beats any flower anyways.. (you took the mang plush and put it on a rack by the door)

him: yup! and why buy flowers when you have me? *does the flower pose*

- you: you're unbelievable, jung hoseok

him: ohh full name now, it's getting very serious ~

you: stop teasing!!

-you felt that you were blushing and turned away from him, still unable to hide your smile. hobi laughed while he quickly stepped through the doorway, just in time to grab your wrist and make you face him again. "look at us, y/n, playfully bickering like a couple hmm~~", he said and gave you a smirk that made your knees weak, but you'd be damned if you'd show him that. So you looked him straight into his eyes with a cocky smile and asked: "anything you wanna ask me, jung hoseok?"

"you don't even know what you do to me with that smile of yours, sweetheart..."

"answer the question, jung hoseok."

"look at us us, flirting like a couple hmm~~"

(you didn't even notice how close you two were standing until there were only a few inches between your lips and his)

"I'm waiting", you whispered.

"i really think... ", he began and gently cupped your face meanwhile... "i really think that we should be a couple" he said and finally closed the little space which had remained between your lips.

[sluttysan]

ATEEZ trying mutual masturbation with you

✰Seonghwa:

Seonghwa is down to try anything that includes you and him in a bed naked together

And he already is a dominant person as your bf, but he’s still gentle and sweet

But he loved any chance to break out of his sweet and gentle nature

Which he never failed to show you when it comes to your sexual experiences with him

So you’ll always get a little bit more of his dominant side, even when he wasn’t allowed to touch you

And you bet he was more than ready to take you up on your offer

He finds fun in this way more than you’d think 

So you’ll be surprised to see how you will end up being the one who couldn't handle not touching him

And did he take this opportunity to tease you? 100% most definitely he did 

Seonghwa will keep eye contact as he rubbed his growing cock, saying the dirtiest shit to you

“Fuck, look how hard I am getting for you. Too bad you can’t suck me off” 

“You like watching me stroke my cock like this, don’t you?”

He’ll even start instructing you on how to touch yourself

“Open your legs wider, let daddy see you finger yourself”

His eye contact will be so intense

Ends up controlling the situation

“Don’t cum without me”

When he lets you cum, he’ll continue to watch you 

Then he’d release himself, groaning shamelessly as he cums on his thigh

✰Hongjoong:

Is crazy in love with masturbating with you

Like the idea is so exhilarating to him

Boy strokes his cock very quickly 

And moans super loudly

Enjoys it more than you do tbh

Like doing something he once only did in private in front of you was exciting to him

Edges himself to try to last longer than you

Like he’ll jerk himself off until he feels like he’ll cum

But then he’ll stop himself and catch his breath

Is the type to still find ways to touch you

Bc as much as he tried, he just has to

Like when you least expect it, he’ll grab you by the neck and sloppily makeout with you for like 10 secs

And his lips would be on yours before you could do anything about it cheater

He’ll also nibble on your neck 

But like it’s helping you get closer to your climax so you wouldn’t mind

He really gets lost in the moment tbh and will probably end up cumming before you anyways

Expect to witness how he sounds as he’s getting himself off when you’re not around

Like how he’d let out a few staggering moans and grunt as he came

And he cums all over his stomach

If you’re still not done, he’ll offer to eat you out until you were

✰Yunho:

Let’s be honest, Yunho is lowkey a very dirty minded one

Like normally, he’s a soft ass who makes jokes that genuinely make you laugh sometimes

But he’s a completely different person when it comes to all things sexual 

And he’s down to try almost anything with you

But when you brought mutual masturbation on the table, he would giggle

Normally, he’d stop being goofy when it comes to said sexual things, especially when you’re going to be completely naked

But you two were masturbating by each other in bed, and he found that to be kind of funny a childish man™

But then he would hate the idea of not being able to touch you

So he really though this through before agreeing

Even though he knew it wasn't his cup of tea, he decided to do it once for you

He was still going to have fun with you regardless

Ok so probably halfway in, he somehow turns it into a competition bc boy’s competitive 

So he’ll watch your every move and tries to make himself last as long as you

"You’re going to cum before me, I just know it”

You two would end up competing to see who cums last

And he’ll hold it in until you couldn’t

You could see him struggle to hold himself in, but as soon you came, so did he

Cums all over the sheets same as if he were by himself

Laughs afterwards, telling you to never suggest that ever again unless you wanted to lose...again

✰Yeosang:

Tbh is so fucking awkward about it at first

Like he’ll mess up with even taking off his own clothes bc he has no clue on what to expect

Is quiet at the start

Is a bit timid because he’s jerking off while you’re there, something he usually just did by himself

Even though you’re also touching yourself, he still feels shy

But once he sees that you’re getting into it, you’ll see him grow 

His eyes would go back and forth between your face to your fingers

He’d lick his lips as he watched you rubbed your clit and finger yourself

He’ll move closer to you, groaning and enthralled, looking down at his own cock occasionally as he played with himself 

He finds that he actually likes it...well, for the most part

He’d like it even more if you let him at least kiss you

Yeosang’s very sensual when it comes to doing intimate things with you

So he would end up kissing you deeply as he continued to stroke himself

And his kisses would be so slow and comforting

So if you were nervous before, like him, you’ll both end up enjoying it more than when you started

It would be a pretty lengthy experience with him, and he prefers to take his time with it

Yeosang would make it into something more than just masturbating next to each other

And he’s very patient with you, so if you weren’t ready to cum at the same time he was, he wouldn’t mind holding it in 

Would love to cum on your stomach or anywhere on your body since you’re there, he finds it more intimate that way

✰San:

When you first ask San to try it, he’s super excited

Like this boy will love trying anything sexual with you

But then almost instantly regrets it

He just would not have the patience

Literally this boy could probs jerk off 2-3x a day easily 

You would think he would be into it for that reason alone 

But honestly he would rather not touch himself when you’re literally right there

And he’ll tell you that

“wHy CaN’t wE jUsT fUcK?” annoying ass

Like you being right in front of him while he touches himself is one thing

And you being naked is another thing

But you touching yourself while naked??? and in front of him??? 

And you’re telling him he can touch himself but can’t touch you????

That’s a big FUCK and NO in San’s book

Will most definitely try to touch you, so you’re going to have to swat his hand away multiple times

Does it on purpose and it’s obvious

“Are you sure you don’t want me to do that for you?”

Honestly you’re going to have to deal with him one of two ways  

You could 1. promise to try something he’s been wanting to try with you

And just like that, he would switch up and comply with you

Like suddenly there would be enthusiasm

However, this lil shit would just hurry up and try his best to cum fast so he could get it over with so he could try that new something

Or 2. just give the boy the head/quickie he wants

Either way, San wins

✰Mingi:

First of all, Mingi would try anything with you, no matter how unsure he was about it

And boy was he unsure about this

But he’ll try his best bc he's whipped for you

Expect lots of questions though

“So I just touch myself?”

“Mhm.”

“Like this?”

“Mingi, have you not masturbated before”

You’re going to be the one guiding him since he’s never done it before in front of you or probably anyone 

Is so fucking nervous and might need a little help getting hard at first

“Just touch yourself like how you normally would”

“...Okay, I’ll try”

And so he’ll close his eyes and naturally start stroking himself as if he’s the only one there

Breathes loudly and bites his lip, and he’ll open his eyes to look at you every now and then 

His glancing will turn into staring and admiring you

Becomes so tempted to touch you

Especially when you’re sprawled out like that with your legs spread as you’re moaning and watching him back

It makes him so weak

“I really want to touch you right now, baby. This is so hard”

But doesn’t reach out to touch you or anything bc he wants to still give it his all for you

Asks if you were close, and waits so that you both could cum together

He really just wants to take in whatever he could from the experience

Releases himself quietly bc he likes hearing your moans

So much more when he hears you moan his name

Leaves a mess as he’s cumming, gets a little bit on you

Would only try it again if you two were going to touch each other, bc he would find it more enjoyable that way

✰Wooyoung:

Another impatient bitch

Literally whines the entire time

Doesn’t get the point of doing it because you’re right there

“Let’s just have sex instead”-Wooyoung one minute in

You probably won’t enjoy it for this reason in particular

Tries to get you to change your mind about trying it out

“Wouldn’t it be better if I finger you and you jerk me off? Wouldn’t that be more fun?”

“I feel like if I wanted to touch myself I would do it on my own, you know?”

When he sees you wouldn’t let him get his way, he stops pleading with you and gives you what you want

So he’ll pretend he’s getting into it

And you’ll never know he was just faking 

That's his way of finding a way out of it 

Bc this one was not about to cum from stroking himself when you’re with him

So you better believe he’ll stroke himself super slowly and just wait for you to cum first

And the second you do so, it gets him even hornier

So before you knew it, he’ll be on top of you 

“Well, looks like I failed at this. I have no choice but to fuck you”

You’ll probably never try this with him again bc this one practically sees it as a form of torture

✰Jongho:

Tbh when you bring it up with Jongho, he’ll be confused

Like it didn’t make sense for you to touch yourself in front of him when he was there, and vice versa

Goes in very skeptical, but he’ll still try it with you bc you wanted to

Doesn’t get hard right away because he’s extremely shy about it

Like even just normal intimacy with you made him hella shy already 

So jerking off in front of you is something he's not going to get used to any time soon

Thinks it’s something that should just stay in private

So he’ll have that mindset going though with it

But again, bc he loves you, he’ll do it with you

Even though he’d rather touch you and not himself at the moment

So he’d sigh and agree reluctantly

But when he sees you enjoying yourself, he starts growing and getting all hot and bothered

And he’ll have a change of heart when he hears you moaning his name

Is more fascinated with how you masturbate more than anything

“Is...this how you do it all the time? You moan my name?”

So he’ll end up watching you for the most part and doesn’t really tend to himself

So his hands just kind of sit on his hard member, rubbing slowly at the sight of you

Before he knew it, you’ll end up cumming before him

And then he’ll feel awkward bc you’re already finished and just watching him touch himself

You’re probably going to help him finish bc he was now sexually frustrated and unable to cum on his own

[marshunter06]

“Didn’t I”- OneRepublic (Romanogers)

AN: Shout out to @lotsofloveish for pushing me to listen to this song giving me inspiration. Tbh this should probs be a multichap fic, but I suck at those. Maybe one day I’ll actually do it...

Didn't I, didn't I, didn't I love you?

Didn't we, didn't we, didn't we fly?

Know that I, know that I still care for you

But didn't we, didn't we say goodbye?

Steve brought back the soul stone last. He has hoped that doing so would immediately bring her back, but it didn’t. He waited even with Red Skull warning him it would not work. He should have been back to his reality, but he couldn’t face it without her. It wasn’t until Clint went looking for him on Voirmir with the same somber expression that gave him the strength to leave.

“I miss her too, but it’s time to go home. Nat would want you to go back.”

——

Natasha opens her eyes, wait, that shouldn’t be possible. She should be dead, she jumped off the cliff. She sits up, observing her surroundings, still in Voirmir and indeed at the bottom of the cliff. She gets up on her feet, the motion makes her muscle ache. It feels too real for someone who shouldn’t be alive. She doesn’t understand. One thing’s for sure, she wouldn’t be able to scale the cliff and get back up. Even if she did, she wouldn’t be able to get back. If she did somehow come back from the dead, no one would know, Clint would’ve taken the ship which leaves her stranded. There has to be another option… She still had the pym particle! It miraculously survived the fall, she could use it to go back to the original timeline as long as the rest of her equipment was still working. This was her only shot, she had to try it.

——

A month has passed since he returned the stones, earth is slowly readjusting to the blip. Things have somewhat gone back to normal. Still Steve is haunted by the loss of his one true love. He tries to busy himself, but then he’ll think he sees her at a coffee shop only to be let down when he can’t find her. He’s starting to lose his reality without Natasha to guide him. She’s always been the one to point him in the right direction, he’s lost without her.

——

It worked, but she was too late. Thanos has been defeated, and Tony had to pay his life to do so. They were supposed to bring everyone back with the stones, now Morgan will grow up without her father by her side. She may have missed the funeral, but nothing is stopping her from paying her respects now.

“Thought I would find you here.”

“I thought you were dead.”

“I could say the same thing about you. How did you know I would be here?”

“Where else would you be if you were alive? You’re not that hard to figure out.”

“What do you want from me Yelena?”

“A chance for you to come back home. The rest of the world thinks you’re dead, it’s the perfect cover.”

“You really don’t know me if you think I would agree to that.”

“You can’t hide from your nature Natalia, we’re black widows, we’re meant to work in the shadows.”

“Not this one. I won’t go back.”

“Suit yourself, don’t blame me for what happens next.”

“The red room is gone, you don’t have anything over me anymore.”

“Whatever helps you sleep better at night sister.”

——

It started with just seeing her, but now six months later, he swears he hears her laugh. He was headed back to his place past a packed bar scene when he heard her. He nearly dropped his takeout. There were too many people around, he couldn’t tell where it came from. His mind must be playing tricks on him again, but the sound was so real. He could recognize her voice anywhere.

——

In the end, Natasha knew she couldn’t just let Yelena get away. They were her family first, even though they’re on the wrong side, besides keeping her close makes it easier to figure out her next move. Still she couldn’t stay away from her real home for long. She really has gone soft. She used to be able to go deep undercover for months even years at a time, now she can’t help yearning to be back at Steve’s side. Just one look she would tell herself, any longer than that and she would be found out. Once Hydra is taken care of, then she could go get that life they both talked about.

——

Steve never thought he would have to go without her, but a year later Natasha still wasn’t back. He visits her gravesite often wishing she would give him a sign that she hears him. He can’t fathom a life without her even though he knows she would have wanted him to get one. Either they move on together or not at all. No one could ever compare to her.

Didn't I, didn't I, didn't I love you?

Didn't we, didn't we, didn't we try?

Know that I, know that I still care for you

Tell me why good things have to die

——

A full year passes and Natasha isn’t close to stopping Hydra. Maybe she should ask for help, she knows Sam and Bucky have been following the tracks she’s left behind. She wonders why Steve isn’t with them, but she knows the answer. He’s exhausted and with no one to stop him from being so reckless, he’s a liability to the mission. Grieving both her and Tony’s death really took a toll on him. He hasn't been able to move on. Maybe she should let him know she’s alive, but it would jeopardize the little progress she’s made here. Yelena trusts her and she’s on the inside, she can’t risk this no matter how much she wants to.

——

When word got to Steve that Hydra was starting to thrive once more he knew he had to stop them. He was in no condition though, so when Sam and Bucky offered to go check things out he didn’t fight them. He finds himself doing what Natasha did during those five years before Thanos was finally turned to dust- running the newly built Avengers headquarter. He thinks back to their many long conversations at night when they’ve both had too much to drink. They made countless plans together for when they could find a way to reverse everything. He would take her to all the places he traveled to during the war and they would trade stories. She would take him back to her motherland and give him a glimpse into her past. They would stay up late, not because of a mission, but because they could finally relax and just enjoy being in each other’s company.

Never thought we'd ever have to go without

Take you over anybody else, hands down

We're the type of melody that don't fade out

Don't fade out, can't fade out

——

He never did get to say goodbye to her, and he still won’t. He doesn’t know why he keeps on holding onto the hope she’s alive. It’s almost as if he could feel that she was still with them, did Pepper think that about Tony?

“Hey Cap, you doing okay?”

“Yeah, sorry Sam, I spaced out.”

“You sure you’re up for this?”

“It’s what she would want. It’s been almost two years now. Besides this is her family we’re dealing with.”

“She told you about them?”

“Not entirely, but I know how much Yelena means to her.

——

“So we finally meet, Captain America.”

“You can still do the right thing Yelena. You don’t have to follow Hydra.”

“I’m not like my sister, we have different ideals.”

Before he could get another word out, an explosion interrupts them. He’s thrown backwards, he gets up almost immediately after the fall, but she’s disappeared in the smoke.

“Sam, Buck, are you both alright?”

“Fine. The explosion didn’t quite reach us, in coming Sam!”

“Little busy here Cap.”

“Take care of those guys, I’m going after her.”

He makes it out of the building fairly quickly, he sees a flash of black over on the right towards the field. He immediately follows it, she couldn’t have gotten far. He gets closer and sees that she has a mask on. He didn’t think she brought a friend, but it was obvious he wasn’t chasing Yelena. There was something familiar about this person though. He nearly catches up to her when another explosion sounds in the distance.

“Steve we’ve got more company. Sam and I are on the way to you.”

He narrowly dodges a grenade Yelena throws at him. He throws his shield at her in return knocking her down. Instead of focusing on Steve, she shouts at the other widow he was chasing.

“Get out of here now!”

The masked widow runs off while Yelena gets up. Steve picks up his shield deciding not to run after the other person.

“You’re not getting away from me this time.”

“Watch me.”

She strikes first, knowing he would block it. He strikes back, but she moves out of the way. Neither of them noticed until it was too late, a widow bite shot out hitting Yelena. On the other end of it was the same person she told to run away.

“Who are you?”

She doesn’t answer him, instead she gestures for him to look behind him, another explosion ensures. It knocks all three of them back. Steve recovers first he looks for the two widows, he sees the ripped mask first then he sees her.

“Nat?”

“I’m sorry Steve.”

Smoke surrounds them in an instant. By the time it fades they’re both gone. She’s gone. Again.

We had our moments, didn't we? (Oh)

So much that we will never be (Oh)