#so I thought maybe I should add his tag too... (PLS DON’T BE MAD)

[lauraneedstochill]

My first choice (part 1/2)

summary: Aemond thinks you are way too good to be Aegon’s best friend. But you are enough for the one-eyed prince to fall in love with. pairing: Aemond Targaryen and F!Reader words: ~ 5500 warnings: friends to lovers, slow burn (with very obvious mutual pining), angst, Aegon is a sad boy (but ends up being a pretty good wingman!) author’s note: this is inspired by “Little women” and Amy March in particular. I took the liberty to rewrite some plot lines because to me Aemond is nothing like Laurie (Aegon is ;) and I hate love triangles so we are not having any of that sorry. it’s a bit of a roller coaster so I divided it into 2 parts: the first one explains Aemond’s feelings, the second one is about hers. ✨ part 2

Part 1. How could you be so blind. Aegon knows he’s supposed to be relieved — he never wanted the crown and now that Rhaenyra is the Queen and a feast is arranged in her honor, he should be celebrating. And he may have been hitting the wine way too hard for the past couple of hours, but he can’t pretend to be happy, and he gave up trying to force a smile. It’s ridiculous that he is upset over this, and yet he can’t help but feel horribly useless. The prince drinks one cup after another until the room starts spinning and he can’t even sit straight — and then he suddenly finds himself propped against the wall, sliding under the table instead of sitting at it. Aegon catches a few judgemental glances but at this point, he couldn’t care less. There is only one person whose judgment he is afraid of — and it’s not long before he’s greeted with a displeased remark:

“When I asked you not to swoop too low, I couldn’t imagine you would literally lay on the floor.”

He looks up — and here you are, staring down at him, not even trying to cover up your disappointment. At any other time, Aegon would’ve at least tried to sober up, but today he’s disappointed in himself, too, so he doesn’t make an effort. Instead, he reaches out an arm to you with a lax smile.

“Would you like to join me?”

“I didn’t get the invitation to this pity party so I will pass,” your tone suggests you are not in the mood for jesting. “Now that you’ve succeeded in making a fool out of yourself, would you mind getting upright?”

“I think I like it here,” he retorts, shamelessly staring at the legs of the maids passing by. 

“You like wallowing in misery for all to see?” you huff. “Aegon, get up.”

He fakes a whine. “My legs gave out, I’m afraid!” 

“You would need to drink all the wine in the castle for that to happen, and I doubt you managed to do that,” you roll your eyes, taking a step toward him — but pause upon hearing a voice behind your back:

“You underestimate my brother.”

Aemond has a habit of sneaking up on people which often startles you yet right now you are too angry at Aegon to be bothered. You throw Aemond a glare over your shoulder but your eyes soften when you see the apologetic look on his face. It’s not the first time that the two of you find yourself in this situation — throughout the years you learned to work as a team: you bring Aegon back to his senses while Aemond helps to physically bring him to the nearest flat surface. You have never asked him for help — and yet he’s always there.

Aemond is about to lean down to help his brother up — you stop the one-eyed prince with your hand, your palm inches away from his chest. Anyone else would’ve thought twice before standing in his way but you don’t hesitate.

“He is perfectly capable to get up on his own,” you reject Aemond’s attempt, your eyes fixed on Aegon. “He can hold onto the wall shall he feel unable to stay on his two feet.”

There is something in your gaze that makes Aegon uncomfortable, piercing him to the bone. You are never downright mean or rude but with just a few words you can easily unmask his feigned recklessness. The prince stands up, tottering and feeling a little light-headed.

“Are you happy, now when I’m in the standing position?”

“If you cared about anyone else's feelings but your own, you wouldn’t be in this position,” you scold him while Aemond takes his brother under the arm to guide him out. Aegon tries to grab another cup of wine but you slap his hand.

“Do you ever get ashamed of yourself?” you hiss at him.

“Let me think... No, why would I?” he sounds sarcastic.

“You should be,” you whisper scream at him. “You can find nothing to do but dawdle and make a mockery of yourself!”

Aemond feels his brother shuddering at your words, and he tightens his hold on Aegon.

“Well, what else am I to do,” his voice is bitter. “Since I am not an heir and serve no purpose to the realm nor do I have any taste for duty.”

You slow your pace, and a sigh leaves your mouth.

“I feel sorry for you, Aegon, I do. I only wish you’d bear it better,” you reach out to stroke his arm but the prince bristles.

“You don’t have to feel sorry for me. Your duty is to marry, and we will see how that goes,” he mutters before he can stop himself — and regrets it the very next second when you swiftly turn to him.

“At least I would be respected if I couldn’t be loved,” your tone hushed but sharp.

Aegon stops dead in his tracks, his wide eyes meeting yours. You moved away from the crowd into the hall, and it becomes silent. And then his lower lip quivers.

“But I thought that you loved me,” Aegon whimpers, his assumed nonchalance instantly gone.

“Oh, Aegon, how much did you have to drink?” you come to his side, lending him a shoulder to cry on. While he’s aggressively sniffling, you look at Aemond and quietly mouth “How many cups?”

“Way more than usual,” he gives you a wan smile, and you groan at his answer, taking Aegon by the arm.

“Alright, you can lean on me. But don’t get handsy or I will push you down the stairs,” your remark earns a weak laugh from the older prince, and the three of you head toward his chambers.

Aegon doesn’t talk much but his mood softens and you exchange a few jokes before finally reaching his room.

“I can take it from here,” Aemond suggests but his brother eagerly protests.

“No, I want to be tucked into bed! And definitely not by you,” he sticks out his tongue, and you chuckle at his whim.

“Aemond, I can handle him.” 

The one-eyed prince shoots you a knowing glance and holds the door open for you and Aegon to walk in. You slowly move to his bed, making sure he doesn’t stumble on his way — and then, with a sudden boost of energy, the prince flops down on the fluffy blankets, letting out a satisfied moan. You hold back a giggle and wait for him to crawl under the covers.

“Should I call for the maid to help you undress?”

“No, I am way too comfortable like this,” he pulls the blanket up to his chin, and you sit on the edge of the bed.

“I am sorry for the way I behaved,” he reveals, frowning. “I did not mean to, truly.”

“Aegon, you know I’m not the one you should apologize to,” you take his hand in yours, and he squeezes it with childish eagerness. “You left Helaena all alone. And you promised me you would make an effort.”

“I know, I know,” he yawns. “I was doing better until today, I swear, you should ask her,” his speech becomes incoherent as he is already too drowsy to talk, his cheeks flushed from the wine and the heat of the blankets. As you stand up to leave, Aegon mumbles:

“I fetched you a book... the one you were looking for,” he sloppily points to his table by the window before dozing off.

There is only one book so it’s easy to find — and when you do, you can barely contain a sound of surprise: it’s the complete history of Westeros, heavy and hardcover, decorated with gilding. You glance at Aegon but he looks fast asleep so you cautiously get out of his chambers.

If you were to turn around, you would’ve noticed that he kept an eye on you with a grin on his face.

When you walk out, you see Aemond still standing there, his gaze landing on the book and then immediately on you. It takes you a minute to figure it out and then you smile at him:

“Even though I appreciate the gesture, it is hard to imagine Aegon in the library.”

“He asked me to help him find the book you wanted. I did,” the prince explains as if it isn’t that big of a deal. But to you, it is — although you think he only did it out of politeness.

“Thank you, Aemond,” you enthusiastically turn your attention to the book, flipping through the pages in awe. He watches you, feeling the warmth in his chest at the sight of your joy.

“You know that you bring out the best in him?” Aemond says in a low voice, and your heart skips a beat at his comment. You are thankful for the dim lighting that makes your heated cheeks less obvious.

“You overestimate my influence,” you say, then dither before admitting, “I’m afraid I was too hard on him today.”

“Someone has to do it,” Aemond objects, and there’s something in his tone — sincere and soft, that makes you look at him again. At this moment, away from the prying eyes and the pressure of everyone’s expectations, you can see the side of him that people rarely get acquainted with.

“I think you are doing a pretty good job, too,” you tell the prince, finding his presence ever so calming. You could never understand why would anyone call Aemond intimidating when he’s been nothing but kind to you ever since you two met. Whenever you have a chance to be alone with him, his company always brings you comfort, and that feeling is so rare, you want to chase it.

But then you remind yourself of the harsh reality, and your smile falters.

“I’m sorry you had to get involved,” you look down at the book. “I wouldn’t want to distract you.” 

“You need to elaborate on that,” Aemond says uncomprehendingly.

“I’ve heard that you were courting lady Baratheon,” you explain casually, avoiding his gaze.

He hesitates before answering.

“Well, I only plan to,” the prince clarifies. “If she accepts my advances.”

“It would be silly of her not to,” you blurt out and, while you can’t see it, Aemond gives you a quizzical look.

“She may have her reasons —” 

“I can’t come up with a single one,” you tell him with so much confidence, Aemond’s heart flutters at your words but you continue without a second thought. “You are intelligent, good-hearted, handsome — and a really skilled swordsman. Not to mention you have the biggest dragon in the realm, which does sound like a reasonable perk.”

The prince is glad that you’re too preoccupied with the book to see his stunned expression. It’s not just the fact that you compliment him so easily — but also the way you do it. When other people try to, they usually start with Vhagar as if the old grumpy creature is the main good thing about Aemond. But you only bring up the dragon at the very end and in passing, instead keeping the focus on the prince. He is silent for a moment, letting your words sink into his memory.

And then Aemond persuades himself that you only said it out of politeness.

You notice his lack of response — and you are about to question it when a maid comes to you in haste:

“Lady Y/N, your presence is needed. Your father is looking for you.”

“Better not keep him waiting,” the prince encourages you with a grin. “If he finds Aegon, he might hug him to death.”

You playfully elbow him and turn to follow the maid but then stop to say. “Please make sure your brother stays in bed.”

“Will do,” Aemond looks at you walking away, clutching the book to your chest as if it's the most precious thing in the world.

To this day, it is truly a mystery to him how Aegon managed to befriend someone like you. You met the Targaryen brothers when your family was invited to one of the royal feasts. You were ten-and-three, the middle one of three sisters. Your oldest — Elaesa — has been the center of attention, beautiful and graceful, but while everyone’s eyes were on her, you looked a little bit disoriented. It was the first feast that you’ve attended, and maybe you got too agitated or overwhelmed — or both — but soon you ended up lost in the castle, and somehow ripped the hem of your dress in the process.

Aemond was the one to find you. The prince has never been keen on taking part in celebrations, often sneaking away from all the noise. That’s when he saw you — fussing with the dress, your sobs echoing through the hall.

“Are you hurt?” he rushed to your side, and you looked up at him with blubbered eyes.

“Why do you have so many halls? You should hand out maps so people can find their way back,” despite being clearly upset, you sounded unusually serious, and Aemond fought back a smile.

“I can help you find your parents without a map,” he suggested, and for a second it seemed to lighten your mood but then your pout worsened.

“I cannot go back,” you gestured at the dress. “I am in such trouble!” you whined, the tears threatening to spill out of your eyes. 

Truth be told, Aemond didn’t have much experience with ladies back then nor did he know a thing about dresses but your distress seemed so genuine he couldn’t leave you be.

“It is not that bad,” he pointed at the ripped material. “I can ask our seamstress to take a look.”

You studied his face for a second, then glanced back at the dress — surprisingly, that was all it took for you to stop crying, and no other coaxing was needed. You wiped your nose and fixed your hairdo, smoothing the damaged hem the best you could.

“I’d appreciate it if you help me find my way back,” you said, your face seemingly more relaxed.

Getting you to talk was pretty easy, and Aemond shortly discovered how open-minded and outspoken you were, using your quick thinking to compensate for your timid personality. When you returned to the hall of the Iron Throne, he was reluctant to let you go but promised to come back with the seamstress. The task only took him about ten minutes, but when he did reappear, you were not alone — Aegon was standing next to you, making you laugh so hard, it looked like you forgot about the dress already. Aemond didn’t mean to interrupt as he suddenly felt very out of place, uninvited in his own home, so he abandoned the idea of helping you and just left.

At first, he thought you fell for Aegon’s flirtatious charms but soon learned that, as much as you did like his brother’s humor, his charms had no effect on you. On the contrary, you often chided him for hitting on young girls and openly condemned his affection for wine. Your honesty set you apart from all the ladies Aegon was surrounded with — and that was the reason he came to enjoy your company as much as he did. Despite the three years age gap, you were the one who told him the truth, no matter how ugly it might’ve been, but you did so without prejudice or any ill intentions. You would usually follow your critique with advice or a solution of some sort to keep the prince away from unnecessary trouble. That is why you were on friendly terms with Helaena, too, and your influence was also welcomed by Alicent, the then Queen. She liked that you were straightforward with your remarks and often said that you were wise beyond your years. Although, as much as Aemond agreed with it, he suspected there was a reason you had to grow up early.

It happened the same year you met — your older sister, with all her grace and beauty, ran away from home to elope with some unworthy beggar. Your mother was inconsolable for at least a week, saying that Elaesa brought shame upon her family. Your father, the kind man that he is, forgave his daughter fairly quickly and tried his best to restore peace. And yet, you came to realize that Elaesa’s vagary did cast a shadow over your House. Your youngest sister, Alyna, was a fragile little thing, frequently sick and tacit — which left you to be the one representing your family in the eyes of society.

Within a few years, there wasn’t a thing you weren’t good at: lords lined up to have a dance with you, ladies admired how well-spoken you were and shared a laugh at your florid sarcasm, and you learned to embroider, to ride a horse, to walk exquisitely dressed and with impeccable posture. But while for everyone else it was a reason to compliment you, Aemond saw the underlying cause of your diligence — the corrosive desire to prove one’s worth which was something he learned to live with as well. And which led him to think he understood you better than anyone.

More often than not he found himself watching you as if he had the need to make sure you weren’t in harm’s way. Helping you with Aegon was a part of that routine but it also gave him a chance to be alone with you. You talked about everything and nothing in particular, and he would catch glimpses of you — the real you, shy and emotional at times, but still understanding and perceptive. He cherished every opportunity to steal you away from the never-ending chattering, from lords ogling at you, from Jason Lannister whose interest in your company should’ve been concerning. Aemond has gotten so used to observing you, so enthralled with your covert conversations, he didn’t realize that a particular feeling was creeping up on him. But there was one person who turned out to be more observant than Aemond has been. Aegon was the mere reason why his brother ended up at your door a few days later. Aemond’s been to your place a couple of times and he promptly memorized the way to the farthest room of the house — the one you used to paint in. It was the only thing you truly allowed yourself to enjoy, an unexpected talent of yours which you soon perfected, too, except it wasn’t meant for the others to marvel at but plainly for you to keep your head occupied, to have some quiet time.

He walks in when you are already painting the finishing touches. When you turn to greet him, you stop mid-sentence, seeing that it’s Aemond instead of his brother who you were waiting for.

“He overslept,” the younger prince shrugs. “It isn’t a bothersome task to come pick up the portrait of my nephews.”

You point in the direction of the painting with the brush in your hand. Aemond admires your work — as he always does — while you try to shake off your confusion. There is another reason you did not expect to see Aemond today. You tarry with voicing your concern but eventually glance at him with empathy.

“I was sorry to hear about lady Baratheon’s decision.”

“I was not,” he’s quick to retort.

“I cannot imagine agreeing to marry a Stark,” you say, dipping a brush in a jar of water.

“Is it the cold weather?” Aemond grins knowingly.

“Yes! Gods, just thinking about it makes me feel uneasy. All the layers you have to wear to keep yourself warm, barely being able to move, getting no sunlight...,” you ramble, making sure to wet all the brushes before lining them up on the table.

“Some say they’ve got quite a beautiful scenery,” Aemond tries to object although he knows his argument doesn’t stand a chance.

“I wouldn’t be able to enjoy that,” you huff. “How am I to capture the beauty if my paint freezes?”

He only hums in agreement, watching you busy yourself with your supplies. You go through the brushes, delicately cleaning the bristles with a cloth. Your fingers carefully take one brush after the other, and Aemond silently admires your love for neatness and order.

“You are staring,” you say without turning to him.

“Where do you want me to look at?”

“Aemond, you are in a room full of art!” you chuckle lightly. “Surely, enough options to land your eye on.”

The prince lets his gaze go around the place, and it takes him about a minute to quickly examine all the paintings. And then he inevitably looks at you again. Aemond thinks he likes this view the most.

“When do you begin your next great work of art?” he asks, hoping to distract you. 

You halt movement, then force out glumly:

“Never.”

“What do you mean?” he’s taken by surprise.

“I’ve come to realize that I’d never be a genius,” you reluctantly explain. “So I’m giving up all my foolish artistic hopes.”

“You cannot be serious. You have so much talent and —”

“Talent isn’t genius!” you throw up your hands in defeat, and he can sense your frustration from a distance. “I may be talented in other things, but when it comes to painting, I want to be great or nothing. And I am only of middling talent,” you scoop up the brushes, give them a quick look and place in another jar to dry.

Aemond wants to argue, he really does — but he also knows better than to try and persuade you when you are like this: firmly standing your ground, exuding nothing but stubbornness. In any other situation, he would’ve found it endearing but it’s upsetting to see you downplaying your brilliance.

“Hm, may I at least ask your last portrait to be of me?”

You instantly turn to him, taken aback. Throughout the years you’ve known him, he clearly expressed that he did not like being painted, and you only could make a quick sketch or two, at best, when he wasn’t paying attention.

“Alright,” the long-awaited opportunity makes you smile. “Next time I come for breakfast, I will drag you into the garden to pose for me,” you give him a pointed look, and Aemond humbly nods.

Your smile grows wider but you try to tone it down, afraid to spook him, and focus on wiping the nearest table.

“What are you going to do with your life in the meantime?” he changes the subject.

“Polish up my other skills and become an ornament to society,” you sigh, putting the cloth away.

There’s a brief pause before he says, his voice a bit strained:

“Here is where Jason Lannister comes in, I suppose?”

You say yes but the answer comes a little bit too fast, and Aemond notices that the topic makes you uncomfortable.

“But you are yet to be betrothed to him,” he clarifies, gaze fixed on you.

“I will be if he proposes,” your eyes meet his, and you are sure that there’s a shadow of disapproval on his face that only spurs your stubbornness. You fully turn to the prince to say: “I always knew I had to marry well, I do not feel ashamed of that.”

But Aemond isn’t looking for a fight — he swiftly corrects himself:

“There is nothing to be ashamed of. As long as...” — he can barely bring himself to say it — “As long as you love him.”

For the reason unknown to Aemond, his statement brings a bleak smile to your face.

“I believe we can have some power over who we love,” you object, lowering your gaze for a second as you start absentmindedly twisting the ring on your finger.

“I think the poets would disagree,” he chuckles, trying to defuse the unexpected tension. 

But when you look up at him, your glare is as obdurate as ever.

“Well, I am not a poet, I am just a woman,” you rebut crisply. “And as a woman, I have no illusions about my prospects which do not include me earning a living to support my family. And my parent’s fortune has its limits as I’ve come to learn. Hence why, if I want to have children — I do — and be able to provide them with everything they wish for, I must rely on my husband,” that last word is pronounced with disappointment. “So don’t stand here and tell me that marriage isn’t an economic proposition, because it is. It may not be for you but it certainly is for me.”

Had he not known you, Aemond would’ve been very impressed — with how blunt and witty you are, you are very good at delivering speeches. But as he’s standing in front of you, watching your face, he senses that your determination is akin to despair. Aemond thinks he might take a chance at arguing with you, after all — but you’re both startled by a knock on the door:

“Lady Y/N, Ser Lannister just arrived.”

You look baffled for a second, your confidence crumbling.

“Why would he — I, I didn’t expect him today,” you mumble, almost ashamed of his arrival.

Yet you pull yourself together faster than Aemond can come up with a reason for you to stay. You remove your apron and quickly examine your dress, then move to put on a cape.

“Did I miss any paint stains?” you ask Aemond in a haste.

“No,” he looks over the flowing material of your neat dress, your hair knotted up high — and then, “...Wait!”

You stop abruptly while he grabs a clean cloth.

“There is something on your cheek,” he says as you both step toward each other — and in the next second you are suddenly standing too close. 

You turn to him and shyly shut your eyes, taking a deep breath. Aemond is frozen for a moment but then carefully wipes away a slight smudge of green from under your cheekbone. His hand unwillingly lingers as he examines the delicate features of your face. You open your eyes, looking at the prince questingly. His facial expression is unreadable but it makes you wish you didn’t have to go.

You brush away that silly thought and stand back, fixing your cape.

“How do I look? Do I look alright?”

“You look beautiful,” Aemond says with no hesitation, taking you in — with your cheeks a bit flushed, lip parted and eyes shining. “You are beautiful.”

You seem a bit bewildered at his words but then a smile grows on your face — and in a blink of an eye, you’re gone. The prince is left standing there, staring at the spot where you were just now. The room suddenly feels so empty without you — and so does his heart.

The realization strikes Aemond like lightning: he wants to be the one you come to, at all times. The one holding your hand, watching you paint, or read, or dance — watching you do whatever your heart desires. Because his only desire is to be with you. That thought puts down roots deep into his chest, and he doesn’t know how to pluck it out.

Nor does he want to. It’s all he can think about for the duration of the week, until you come to the castle — with canvas and supplies, not hiding your excitement. He almost forgot about his promise but follows you into the garden without objection. You sense a slight change in Aemond’s behavior, him being more quiet than usual, but decide not to push the prince so he won’t reconsider.

“I will start with a sketch and then we will go from there. Alright?” 

He just hums in response while looking at you but you are unaware of the meaning behind his gaze.

“Take any pose you like, I don’t want you to feel uncomfortable,” you suggest with a half-smile, knowing full well he will probably remain standing.

And he does, arms clasped behind his back, his eye never leaving your face. You immerse in the process too quickly to be bothered, the piece of charcoal in your hand sliding over the paper, leaving lines and shadows. Drawing Aemond is an effortless task, and you can only enjoy how easy it is to sketch the sharp contours of his face and his lean body. The simplicity can also be explained by the fact that you've already memorized all the details by heart: the curves of his cheekbones and his lips, the flow of his silver hair, the shape and cut of his eye.

When you are finally satisfied, you can’t tell if it’s been an hour or three, and the prince, as it seems, hasn’t moved a muscle. At this point, Aemond’s demeanor does worry you yet you blame it on his nervousness.

“Want to take a look?” you hand him a few sketches. “Mind you, I’m not finished so please don’t judge too harshly —”

“I could never,” his hand brushes yours when he takes the drawings.

Aemond has seen your works before but it’s a whole new experience when he’s the one being portrayed. He almost doesn’t recognize himself — you didn’t miss a single feature of his yet somehow this version of him looks too beautiful to be real. He is at a loss for words until he spots that there's another drawing hidden underneath. It’s a sketch of him sitting, both arms on the table, his face looks like he’s deep in his thoughts.

“When did you do this one?”

“After the coronation,” the memory makes you smile. “Made my poor father lug around with charcoal in his pockets while he was trying to keep up the conversation with Ser Lannister.”

It was the day you got introduced to Jason. You were supposed to be by his side, with your charming smile and polite talks, yet you spend your time drawing Aemond. He can imagine your gaze focused on the piece of paper, the way you must’ve been looking at him to capture every detail and movement — all of that without him asking to, without him even noticing. There is so much care in that act, he is unexpectedly moved by it.

The words leave his mouth before he can think them over:

“Don’t marry him.”

His request makes your hands tremble, and you drop the piece of charcoal, slowly looking up at Aemond, the smile disappearing from your face. He did not mean that, you must’ve misunderstood.

“...What?”

Aemond turns to you, looking you straight in the eyes.

“Don’t marry him,” he repeats, helplessly and desperately.

“Why?” you ask in disbelief, suddenly having trouble breathing. The only reason you can think of sounds delusional, close to impossible. You wait for him to come up with some clever explanation — instead, he comes closer to you, his gaze so warm it makes your cheeks burn.

“You know why,” Aemond says and his hand gently lands on yours. You look down at it, perplexed, your mouth opening and closing, heart rate speeding up.

He keeps his eye on your face as he waits for your reply. You are not repulsed nor angry — which is supposed to be a good sign — but the reaction he gets is actually worse than that. Because when you finally glance at him, you look hurt.

“No,” you yank away your hand as if his touch stung. “No, Aemond, you are being mean, stop it,” you take a step back, your eyes glossy and lips tight. The look you give causes him physical pain — while you are trying your best to fight back the tears.

His intelligence clearly fails him because Aemond has no clue what’s going on. He feels like there is a deeper meaning to your words but he does not get it.

“Why am I being mean?” he asks incredulously as you slowly continue putting more distance between you two.

You don’t even realize you are doing it — it’s almost an urge to not be in his presence, for the first time ever. The weight of his words feels suffocating and merciless. How easy it is for him to toy with your emotions, you think, and that cruelty of his — as you see it — wounds you so deeply, he might as well put a torch to your heart.

“I have felt like everyone’s second choice my entire life,” you bemoan, not being able to keep your agony bottled up any longer. “In everything, no matter how hard I’ve worked to be better. I thought you out of all people would understand that,” you sound raspy, trying to swallow the lump in your throat.

“So I will not be the person you settle for just because your first marriage proposal was turned down,” only when your voice shudders, Aemond finally understands how wrongfully you interpreted his intentions.

But you are out of his reach already — at least ten feet away from him, and the distance separates you like a giant chasm.

“No, I won’t. I can’t,” you are hurting so much, your feelings spill out like blood from a wound. “I can’t do it. Not when I have spent years loving you.”

His breathing hitches as your confession pierces through his chest — and he is left speechless, deafened by it. The moment slips through his fingers with unforgiving pace: you were standing so close only a minute ago — and now you are turning your back to him, rushing away. The last thing he sees is how broken you look, your shoulders slumped and eyes brimming with tears. 

Aemond stands, shocked and paralyzed until it’s too late — the garden is silent with your absence and the only evidence of you being there is your supplies scattered on the ground. Your words are ringing in his head, his heart heavy with a dreadful feeling.

He was afraid he would never have you — but he actually could have.

If only he wasn’t so blind.

➡ Part 2

yes, this is me blabbing again: I’ve watched this movie an embarrassing amount of times, and I’ve wanted to write a fic based on it for a few months. I did rephrase a couple of quotes but still tried my best to do the story justice. my apologies for the angst — just so you know, it was painful to write. also, will I ever stop using friends to lovers trope? only time will tell! (I probably won’t, though) I know there is a very heartwarming fic by aemonds-war-crime that was also based on “Little women” and it’s only fair that I link it as well!

tagging @greenowlfactif because you asked 💙 comments and opinions are VERY welcomed! 🥺 🎨 my masterlist English is not my first language, so feel free to message me if you spot any major mistakes!

[artistkoo]

Kiss me, Heal me. 3

Pairing: Jungkook x Reader

Summary: When Jungkook gets injured just before an important game, he sets out to find his soulmate to heal him. In a world where soulmates can heal all kinds of illnesses by kissing, he’s desperate to find his, even if he doesn’t know you yet. What happens if he does find you? Will you kiss a stranger who claims to be your soulmate?

WC: 3k+

Warnings: Smut but it's not who you think it is, Infidelity- but jk has a shitty gf n it's mutual lol, snarky oc at the end.

tags: idiots and enemies to lovers, a lil slowburn, a bit of angst, soulmate culture, smut in the future.

A/N: this is unedited as always so sowee 👅💋 hope ya still like it tho! enjoy loves. :)

pls don’t repost my fic anywhere, if i ever find out you stole my fic idea you’ll regret it. thanks :)

You still couldn't stop thinking about the kiss. Though it was a week ago, and you've been avoiding Jungkook like he had the plague. Also, he went home awkwardly last week after that happened. You wondered if it meant something to him? To you? Of course it meant something to you, you were in-like with him. No matter how hard you tried to deny it, mayhaps you liked him. It really didn't help that you felt like heaven when he kissed you. It kinda makes you think if you were just meant to be healing soulmates and not romantic soulmates. And then there's his girlfriend too, they haven't broken up yet and what if she finds out you kissed his boyfriend? Would that make you a slut? Are you really a slut now? Ugh, maybe you are for Jungkook that is. But no. You should just forget about it, Jungkook doesn't seem like he'll leave his girlfriend for someone like you anyway. Even though you heard they were almost fighting everyday. Your best friend Charlie told you so, of course she asked how last week went and of course you cursed her for making Jungkook scheme with her against you.

But, you also told her about the kiss which she happily squealed when she found out, shipping you both. And then she proceeded to tell you about Jungkook's chaos in paradise. Why did he even kiss you? He's just making you overthink stuff, and it isn't even nighttime yet. Did he just want to help and heal you? Or was it something more? It doesn't matter you kept saying, but maybe you were just trying to convince yourself otherwise.

You went to the library to distract yourself and read some books, and of course like every cliché romance novel- (tho the romance part isn't really true) the person you were avoiding was there. Jungkook and his long curly hair that you hate. Why did he have to be so damn godlike all the time? He was in a casual polo shirt tucked in inside his pants, maybe he didn't have soccer practice today. And he looked so good you were trying not to get wet just staring at him. Maybe he noticed you were ogling him so he decided to stare at you back. But you were still embarrassed and you didn't know how to act around him now, so you went to the back aisle of the library. Not acknowledging that he was calling your name. He didn't let you go though, as he went after you to make your suffering even worse.

"Y/N, hey are you avoiding me?" he suddenly asked. You pretended to be busy reading the book you were holding, just so you didn't have to stare at his handsome face. "Oh. Hey Jungkook, of course I'm not. I'm just busy trying to catch up with school and stuff. Why'd you think so?" you replied indifferently. "You didn't listen to me when I called your name awhile ago, and I haven't seen you around campus so I thought maybe you were avoiding me. Aren't you really?" He said as he moved towards you, making you feel queasy.

"I really am not. I just didn't hear you awhile ago, and besides the whole campus is pretty big maybe we just didn't notice each other." you simply fibbed. "Okay, whatever you say. I just wanted to know how are you feeling btw? Are you feeling better now after we… kissed?" you can't believe his cocky ass would really bring up the kiss. Fck him. "I'm spectacular if you must know. And can we not bring that up ever again please? It doesn't matter anyway." you retorted sarcastically.

"Why not? Are you mad at me because I kissed you? Or are you mad because you loved it?" he said as he moved closer to you trapping you within the shelves. You couldn't breathe but it was also like you didn't care, you wanted him close to you even if you felt like dying inside too. When you finally looked at him in the eye, you weren't surprised that he was staring at you with that playful but concerned look you kinda liked. "Don't be so full of yourself, I only liked it because it healed me. There's no other reason." You tried to shove him off and get away, but he held unto you and placed his hands on your hips. "If that's true, then why can't you look at me more than a minute longer and why are you running away baby?" he whispered into your ear seductively. He then moved to look at your face, and then at your lips. Seemingly wanting to taste them again. And you wanted to taste his too, you remembered how you got almost addicted to his lips the first time you kissed. He leaned in closer and you suddenly remembered you didn't even answer his question yet. But you think you did now as you were kissing him. The kiss didn't last long as you remembered his girlfriend Chaeyoung. It was unfair to her and what if she caught you? You were almost making out with her boyfriend again. The thought was enough to make you pull away from Jungkook, leaving him a little confused.

"Why did you pull away? You can't lie to me, I know you liked kissing me too."

"Yes, maybe I did Jungkook. But it's wrong. You have a girlfriend Jungkook, what are you thinking? What about chaeyoung? Don't you care about what she'd feel?" you reasoned. "I know that, you don't have to remind me. But you're my soulmate Y/N, she's just my girlfriend. And I don't even know what I feel about her anymore, but when I kiss you I don't think about anything or anyone else."

"But we can't do this Jungkook. I can't allow you to cheat on her with me, and I can't allow you to use me while you figure out what you really feel about her. It isn't healthy for the both of us."

"I know baby, I'm sorry. I'm not using you to figure out my feelings for her or forget her, I don't know what it is yet but I feel so good when I'm with you. Can't we just forget about everything for a little while and just let it be?" he said as he cupped your cheeks with his hands. "I don't know Kook, I don't think I can forget that you're with someone else and fool around with you. If things aren't working out for the both of you, why don't you talk it out or break up?"

"It's not that easy to just talk it out with her… and I can't break up with her…" (just yet) Jungkook wanted to add.

"Well what are you planning to do? And what do you want me to do Kook? I don't wanna be the other woman. You surely don't think we'll just mess around while you're still with her?"

"I can't let her go just yet Y/N. I need to think more. But I can't let you go too. You're my soulmate, pls don't give up on me. I just need time to figure things out." Jungkook said dejectedly. "I'll wait for you Kook, I just hope you can make the right decision. Also, It's not like I can avoid you forever. But, maybe it's best if we just stay friends for now. Like friends with no funny business or benefits." You said meaning it seriously but the last part jokingly. Trying to make the mood a little better.

"That's okay with me I guess. Well friend, promise you won't avoid me now?" He looked at you with hopeful eyes.

"Promise. Just don't try to do illegal things to me." You joked. "Okay! Hmm, so you wanna go eat icecream with me at my fave ice cream shop this time?"

"Are you paying for mine? If you are then who am I to say no."

💜💋

"Babe, you feel so good inside me."

"Of course I do, I have the best pussy and you know that."

"Not to ruin the mood, but what about your boyfriend? What if he catches us here? I heard he's built, I'm not saying I'm scared but you know I hate confrontation." The guy said balls deep inside her. "What about him? He doesn't care about me, he's probably fucking someone else too. But I can't break up with him you know? We've gone through a lot, and even if he neglects me I still want & need him. And you can't blame me for wanting someone to fulfill my needs, when he doesn’t anymore. Don't worry about him catching us, he never comes here unless I tell him to. Jungkook is so obedient, but a lousy boyfriend."

After you both finished your ice creams,( you learned his fave was the cookies and cream flavor,) Jungkook didn't want to go home yet. He suggested to go to the bowling alley at the mall, to teach you how to play bowling, because you mentioned you've never played it before.

"You have to hold it like this. Place your middle and ring finger in the top 2 holes and place your thumb into the bottom hole." he instructed, after a while you were almost getting the hang of it, though Jungkook was still the best because he'd made a 'turkey' already. You found out he loved going bowling with his dad, before they fought about his goals and dreams. It's amazing how athletic he is. He's an amazing soccer player, he's good at bowling, he's an exercise muscle pig, he can probably do anything if he puts his mind to it. Maybe the only thing he can't do is leave his girlfriend for you, or like you. But it's not time for your pity party right now.

After a taxing hell week, Jungkook invited you to have a movie marathon with him as a friend at his place, to relax after the horrid week and hangout.

"What movies are we watching this time Kook?" you asked sitting on his bed comfortably, holding a bag of chips to munch on later as you watched movies. "Hmm, I was thinking we could watch all the Iron man movies, and maybe spiderman after."

"Wow you really like Iron man huh?" you teased smirking a little. "Well yeah, only uncultured swines don't." he retorted.

"I really like how pepper stayed by his side through everything. She's a brilliant woman." Jungkook says sometime during the movie. "Yeah, I haven't really seen all the iron man movies till now but I can say they suit each other well. Pun unintended." you laughed at your silly thought, making Jungkook smile too.

You were focusing on the movie when you realized Jungkook's attention wasn't fully on the movie, instead it was at you. He was staring at you and he wasn't even being subtle about it. "Hey creep, why are you staring? You're not planning to murder me are you?" You joked. "I'm not a creep and I'm not planning to murder you, I was just admiring the view." You felt a blush forming in your cheeks at his words. Did he mean he was admiring you? That you were the view? The view isn't even that beautiful though, you thought insecure.

"Stop joking around Kook." you told him shrugging him off. "I'm not though, but I'll stop. Wouldn't want you falling for me even more." He cockily remarked. You knew he was joking but you couldn't help but get pissed a little by his joke. It was like he was trying to rile you up and for what? You couldn't do anything with him. You shouldn't, besides you already had an agreement. "As if Kook, keep dreaming."

"I'll keep dreaming of you then."

"Shut up or I'm really gonna get mad now."

"Okay, okay. I was just teasing babe don't be mad, I'm sorry."

"Let's just continue watching the movie okay?"

"Yeah, of course." he said awkwardly.

💜

You were out buying something at the store when you saw someone familiar passing by. Was that Chaeyoung? Jungkook's girlfriend? After taking the items you bought you followed her, as you were curious if Jungkook was with her at the mall too. But to your surprise she entered a resto, and the guy waiting for her wasn't Jungkook. It was some guy you didn't know but they looked kinda close if you must say. Thinking he was just a friend, you were about to go on your way when you saw at the corner of your eye that they were a little too close to be just friends. She fed him some food and they were sweet with each other. An ugly thought geared in your head. She wasn't cheating on Jungkook wasn't she? But if she were then it would be so unfair to him.

You had the sudden urge to ask her what she was doing when you realized it wasn't your place and your business to butt in. You also remembered that you kissed his boyfriend so you were conflicted. Isn't it hypocritical to hate her for possibly cheating on Jungkook, when Jungkook kinda did the same? Their relationship is kinda fucked up if you think about it, and you don't want to be a part of it. But how can you not be affected when you've already sinned with your soulmate. You decided to go home instead of snitching her to Jungkook, as you thought it wasn't the right time yet. Also, you needed more proof and to know the truth if she really was doing it.

You were back again at Jungkook's place to do a project for school, as the universe decided to make you partners for this class project. Maybe it's the soulmate effect, ew. You should stop being delulu, you thought. You weren't gonna lie and say you don't enjoy spending time with Jungkook though, He was always so adorable and kind. Except for times when his cockiness gets the best of him, he was enjoyable to be around with. "So, which part do you wanna do first?" you asked. "Hmm, maybe the easy one first?" you laughed a little, of course he'd choose the easy part to do. "Okay. You'll do the vocabulary part and I'll do the introduction summary for now." You stated. He agreed and you both proceeded to do the project, chatting occasionally to ask some questions about it. You just finished your tasks for today, when Jungkook decided to make a dad joke and it was actually a good one- or maybe you're just lame that's why you found it so funny that you had tears in the corner of your eyes from laughing so much. Someone decided to knock on his door interrupting your crack fiasco, and you remembered to get yourself together and stop giggling like a crackhead.

"Chaeyoung? Why are you here?" Jungkook said as soon as he opened his door, his girlfriend appearing in front of him. "Because you weren't answering your phone Kook, and now I see why." She retorted, looking at you accusingly. She had put weird extensions on her hair, making her look quite ratchet. But her outfit was kinda nice, it was slutty like her. "Well Y/N's here because we're doing a school project, it's not what you're thinking Chae."

"And what am I thinking Kook? Care to tell me how you know what's on my mind?" she said sarcastically. "I'm just saying the stupid things you're thinking aren't real, babe." Chaeyoung got angry at his statement. "Are you saying I'm stupid Jungkook? How dare you!" she screamed.

"I never said that, you're the one who said it. Are we really gonna fight right now again? Because I don't have the time or energy for it. So can we do it some other time? Not right now when Y/N's here." Instead of being ashamed, the things Jungkook said just seemed to rile up his girlfriend more. "And so fcking what if she's here Kook? I don't care about her, and you shouldn't too. Your business with her is done! You shouldn't be meeting up with her anymore, but look at you hoeing around behind my back." You wanted to defend Jungkook, but you remembered that you did kiss him and that made you feel a little guilty. Though, you agreed to be just friends right now. "I'm not hoeing around Chaeyoung! Stop accusing me of doing things I'm not doing. I care about Y/N because she's my soulmate, and you should respect her as a person if you can't respect us being connected in each other's lives." Jungkook retorted right back at her. "If you're not playing around then why do I feel like you are Kook? A woman's instincts are never wrong. You've been cold to me. And whenever we talk, we just fight. Is it really crazy for me to think that it's because you want something or someone new?" she cried crocodile tears.

"I'm sorry if you feel that way, but It's not wholly my fault. You always seem to find mistakes in me and accuse me of stupid shit I didn't do, that's why we're always fighting. You say I never communicate, but when I try to- you're the one who doesn't listen to me. I don't even know what to do with you anymore Chae. I don't know what to do with us." Jungkook sighed, quite exhausted with the whole conversation they're having. It was so awkward for you to witness them fighting, that you wanted to get out of the room already. So you told Jungkook you were leaving.

"Kook, I'm sorry to butt-in but maybe I should leave now? We're almost done with the project anyway." Jungkook was about to reply and escort you out, but his girlfriend chimed in. "You really only thought to leave now? When you could've done that ages ago? Come to think of it, it's your fault why we're fighting again. You're an annoying little slut." Jungkook was embarrassed and bummed at his girlfriend for insulting you like that, she was being paranoid and a bitch. You decided not to mind her and say anything, even though her bitch ass was really getting into your nerves. "Chaeyoung shut up!" he told her.

"No. Why should I shut up when it's true? It's her fcking fault for being such a flirty whore trying to steal you away from me! You're not even gonna deny it are you?" You couldn't help but answer her as you couldn't take the bullshit she was spouting anymore. "I don't usually respond to background noise and nonsense people, but since you wanted my attention so badly- I'm gonna tell you this. I'm not trying to steal your boyfriend, so please get out of your imagination now, It's not healthy." You retorted snarkily. You were about to get out of the door, but you couldn't help but tell her one last thing before you go,

"And before you call me a whore, make sure you're not one."

And you coolly went out of the door and walked away from them, leaving poor slutty Chaeyoung stunned.

TBC. 💜

If you enjoyed reading this and u wanna help a broke gal buy some food to eat during this pandemic, my kofi is: https://ko-fi.com/neinyajung U can buy me a coffee for $3, only if you want to ofc! I totes understand if u can't. Even just reblogging this chapter would make me happy :)

Also, positive feedback and reblogs are highly appreciated! your comments are what inspires us writers to write more! so pls tell me what u liked about the story, so I'll be inspired to write and give you fast updates.

If you wanna be added on the taglist Reblog and comment on this chapter to be invited on the gc! ty 💜 my taglist is on the Kiss me Heal me tumblr groupchat as it's easier to notify people there.

[courtofjurdan]

Congrats on 300 luv!! Can I request 72. “You deserve so much better.”~ for jurdan pls🥺🥺🥺

Thanks so much for requesting!!! 

part 2

______________

Jude’s insecurities is what hinders her the most. The thoughts that she’s not good enough, pretty enough compared to the folk. She’ll break down her walls for Cardan then the insecurities will whisper in her ear and tell her lies that make her build her walls back up. 

This is the never ending cycle. It’s how it always goes. And she hates it. She feels like she lets Cardan down every time. He knows what she’s doing, he knows the steps she takes. He just wishes he knew the thoughts she thinks.

If he tries to ask her about it, she automatically tells him nothing is wrong and she’s good or that she will get over whatever thing is bothering her so it’s nothing of his concern. But Cardan knows there’s more to it than she is letting on. 

Cardan finds Jude in their room sitting on the edge of their massive bed. She looks distant, empty if he must admit. She doesn’t even acknowledge that he walked in the door. 

He carefully and calmly goes up to her and kneels in front of her. “Jude, dear, what’s on your mind?” 

She looks at him with heavy eyes. It’s like whatever is bothering her is bothering her sleep if the dark circles under her eyes tells anything. 

“I can’t, Cardan.” Her voice broke at his name. 

It cracked Cardan’s heart to see her like this. They have been together for three years and Jude has not shown emotion like this before. She hasn’t shown this vulnerability before. And to be honest, Cardan is not sure what to do. 

“Can’t what, sweetheart?” 

She looked at him with a silver lining in her eyes. “I can’t be what you need me to be.” 

Cardan is very confused. Where is this coming from? “What do you mean?” 

She looked at him in aggravation. “Cardan, you deserve so much better. Look at me. I’m just a mortal girl set with high expectations. I can’t be who you need me to be. I’m fragile. Just a stupid, mortal girl. That’s it. Nothing else. Nothing better.” 

Cardan was baffled. Jude, his Jude with all this doubt. With all this fear, if he may say. 

“Jude, you’re all that I want. You’re not stupid, you’re my whole world. It’s me, Jude, that should be telling you that you deserve better. Why do you think this, darling?” 

Tears were running down her cheeks now. Cardan has rarely seen Jude with tears. He really doesn’t know what’s happening. 

“Why do you want me? In sixty years I’m going to die so why put all the effort into loving me if you’re just going to lose me in the end and forget me.” 

Cardan stood before her. She saw the hurt flash through his eyes. He doesn’t like talking about this. It reminds him of how short mortal life really is. 

When he didn’t say anything, she continued, “See, you don’t even know what to say. That’s a burden that ways down on you everyday, isn’t it? Just knowing you won’t have me forever. You deserve someone who will be with you for eternity not someone who is going to die and leave her husband and chi- I’m mean husband behind. It’s not fair.” 

 Cardan was starting to get mad, “Jude, stop. Just stop. This is a bunch of bull. Stop telling herself this. Yes I may live longer but don’t think when you’re gone that I will forget you. I will never forget you. You make my life light up in the darkness. You make my whole world spin.” Cardan stopped to think for a second. “You stuttered. You never stutter, what were you going to say?” 

She let out a groan. “Nothing Cardan, absolutely nothing.” 

Cardan stared at her. Contemplating what to do now. How to help. He decided to give her some time to think. 

“Okay, I’m going to go get a bath. I want to finish this conversation after I’m done.” He turned and went leaving a very emotional Jude sitting now on the bed. 

He stepped in the bathing chamber and leaned against the door, taking deep breaths. What in the world was going on? Where’s Jude and what happened to her? He shakes his head trying to get the look that was on Jude’s face out of his head. 

She’s only 22. She has many more years. And who knows as long as she stays in Elfhame and doesn’t age, she won’t die. Cardan’s thoughts were wild. He hates thinking of these things. Hates counting down the days. But when his queen wants to bring stuff up like this, he can’t help it. 

He decides to start his own bath tonight, having the servants leave for right now. He sees if he can hear anything from their bedroom but everything is silent. Almost like she never moved. But once he finishes his bath, he walks out to the room in his pajamas, which is absolutely nothing, and sees Jude asleep with tear stained cheeks. 

It breaks his heart. He just wants to help her but she only wants to give half a story and make everyone figure out the rest of it. She literally carries the weight of a kingdom on her shoulders, with Cardan of course, and when she adds more stress to herself on top of the kingdom’s, this is how she acts but now it’s like tenfold worse than usual. This must be bothering her really bad. 

Cardan decides to let her sleep, and finish the conversation in the morning. He gets in bed behind her, kisses her forehead, and wraps his long arms around her small, muscular frame. She looks so peaceful in sleep. Almost like a child. He just wishes it could stay that way for her.

He gets up the next morning to an empty bed. He sighs, loudly knowing Jude is probably somewhere in the chamber. 

He sits up ready to look for her. He goes to the sitting room, not there. He goes to the closet, not there. He goes to the bathing chamber and sees her sitting on the floor. 

“Jude, dear, are you okay?” 

She looks up at him with a sarcastic smile, “me okay? Yes, I’m fine. Just great.” 

Cardan closes his eyes. “Jude tell me what’s bothering you? Or did something happen?” 

She stays silent. Cardan goes and sits on the floor with her. She looks up at him with that empty look that he despises, “Cardan, tell me that you hate me.” 

He narrows his eyes, “Excuse me?” 

“Tell. Me. You. Hate. Me.”

He looks back with hurt seeable in his eyes, “Jude I thought we are past this. I can’t say it for it will not be true. I love you with everything I have.” 

Jude pounds her fist on the floor. Before she can do it again, Cardan grabs her hand. He then takes his own hands and cups her cheeks. “Why are you so mad, darling?”

“I keep on creating problems for you.” She looks down at yourself. “Who really wants this mess of a person.” She was talking about herself. “I’m stubborn, I get mad easily, I’m stuck-up. I’m unfriendly. What do you see in me that you like?”  

“Jude, I like you because of all perfect imperfections. I’ve seen you grow so much as a person these past three years and you amaze me everyday.” 

When Jude didn’t reply back, Cardan calmly asked, “What problem did you make?” 

Jude stood up. She was already dressed and ready for the day even though the sun was just beginning to set. Sleeping for her was as unnecessary as living in the past. 

She stood up and turned to him, “I’m pregnant, Cardan. Now I just made another burden for you to have on your shoulders.  And not only that. In the end I don’t just let you down, I let our child down too…” 

She walked out of the bathing chamber, into their bedroom and Cardan heard the door to their room open and close. 

He couldn’t move. Jude is pregnant. He is going to be a father. That makes sense why Jude was so emotional. She thinks he would be mad or upset. His heart breaks for her while his thoughts are running through his head. But little does she know, this is some of the best news he has ever heard. The best so-called “burden” to have. 

__________

note: I hope you enjoyed this. It is not at all what I expected it to be but I think I like it... maybe. 

Tag list: 

@ummmcutie @aelin-queen-of-terrasen @afexiss @roseygirl25 @mi-mavencalories @spideygirlstuff @deargreenbriar @b00kworm @thequeenofeveything @munchycow @aesthetics-11 @booksrmee @akaloto @hauntedfreakdeputyhero @hurema @dorkzrul @curlyredqueen06 @tanaquilpriscilla

Let me know if you want to be added or taken off of the tag list.

[neo-shitty]

toffee!

hehe glad i could make you laugh, oooh that sounds awesome! yeah id love to be tagged it sounds great :)

YES the differences are so fucking weird. like, they do know they're the same age right? i feel like its just an exagguration of how much the persons role in the group matters, like we see chan being held up as such a mature, old leader while jungkook who is literally the same age, is still babied etc. like enha hyung line is basically the same age (if a bit younger) as chenle and jisung but somehow the rules are different?? as you point out, still legal but still bizarre. hehe yeah, i mean where else are we going to rant? quora lol. mmm, hopefully more people can just write less smut abt people who are barely adults

ah, no prob it didnt take long. yeah i think thats right (i keep forgetting you know my url lol) mmhmm :( i think if that happened irl there would be some major trauma going on. knock wood it never happens to you or me lol (/hj)

hehe same! oooh glad Redemption For Cheese was realised! yess we cant rllycomplain that theyve written/produced too much good music lol. yeah, ive dragged him into being a stay so *dusts hands off* mission accomplished. mmm yeah, they tend to have a certain vibe but tbh it couldve worked if they were any other group but ¯\_(ツ)_/¯ ahh ur one step ahead of me on the stages of listening to ssick i think, still not convinced but thats okay! hehe, it had to be said. yesss the itch in the back of my brain is very satisfied by sorry i love you, felixs vocals deserve to be appreciated! (side note i feel like hes trying to sing more like his speaking voice, sorta husky, but tbh i wouldnt be mad if he sang like in glow, his sweet honey vocals made my life lol. but i think ive heard him say he doesnt like singing like that cos it makes his normal voice less husky, so what can you do)

> YES SOMEONE SAID IT. seungmin rap KING, he sped thru that rap like it was nothing, he deserves more rap lines. i do like how they gave minho some melodic rap lines this comeback, my guy deserved to show off those skills that made him not be eliminated (flashbacks to stay collectively wanting to murder jyp) and we already know changbin can sing, my man murdered masked singer. hyunjin can obviously sing as can jisung and felix, and i want to hear chan rap more! i feel like he started as part of 3racha (as a rap unit not producing) and then just became a vocalist (which im fine with, but it could be nice to hear him flex his rapping skills) and was partially replaced by hyunjin. anywayyy

back to album talk. lmaooo sad music to twerk to PERFECTLY describes silent cry. yes secret secret is and will always be, a masterpiece. hehe glad i could make you laugh :) i just felt like they have similar vibes. putting off skz stuff bc of not having time to cry IS the kpop stan life summarised. oh my beloved track, red lights. ahh thats okay, we can have different opinions, but by god the lyrics are *chefs kiss*. *banging on table* TWISTED AU TWISTED AU TWISTED AU. yess id love to see ur take on it! sdfghjkl it would have been glorious

no no! not stupid, just able to predict my brainwaves. ooooh thats so cool! makes me want to go there (wherever there is lol) yeah the waves are pretty good here, but none of my familys a surfer, so we dont rlly enjoy the full potential lol. YES moving on to gone away, it is indeed a heartwrenching track, but the vocals and the bloody key change? makes me want to brave being sad just to listen to it. mmm yeah, good point :( i feel like ive just gotten used to overthinking so much so that it doesnt matter what mood im in, ill do it anyway, so might as well just do what i feel like doing anyway.

yeah i think ur right! it is quite comforting knowing that all the tracks will get the love they deserve. i feel like also people assume kpop is just one genre which is utter bs. there are so many different vibes and feels and songs, i couldnt get into kpop (of which i thought only the bright cheerful present day bts stuff existed smh) until i heard gods menu so... idk where i was going with this but yeah. :)

YES FUCK YG, theyre literally on the brink of being kicked out of the big three and they are holding their salvation hostage without letting them do ANYTHING. idek what thought process goes thru their minds but arghhh its so infuriating. yess lisa's cb will be awesome but ot4 is the gold standard here.

hehe, glad u could get to this point. no no! u dont sound like a cult member at all lol yeah, i loooove some of their songs but the whole 23 members thing is getting to me. thats prob a common problem with nctzens but what can i say? im a simple girl with a limit to how many korean boys i can give my money to. atm im just trying to get into ateez and finish memorising enhypen's faces. also kard is kinda sucking me into their fandom atm, as well as eric name lol. ah what can you do? ooh thats good!

hehe i love it too! its exactly like online penpals, that was rlly well put. aww ty! hmm im okay, recovering from a bad case of rsv so thats fun. im doing okay mentally, starting therapy soon (after having to convince my mother that its not just smth i can brush off). physically i wont go into, basically i should be doing stretches to help but they dont completely fix it so my lazy ass doesnt do them, plus i got told recently im going to be stuck with this condition for the rest of my life so thats fun! ah, before you type smth dw abt me ill be fine. the weather atm is cloudy but warm, its been raining on and off today which is good for the garden. uhh i just finished reading sunburnt veils and im in the middle of prom theory which is rlly good. ummm ive got a concert tonight? that i may or may not be able to sing in (bc of the whole rsv thingo) and uhhhh idk. my dog is cute? im drinking tea rn? ive got a school dance coming up?

wbu? hows ur day going, how are you? whats the weather like on ur end? done anything interesting lately? found smth that makes you rlly happy? just any random thing youve been dying to tell someone?

no no! dont apologise, i love these exchanges. i think im happy to continue them for a long time :) on the other hand, if you get tired of them, feel free to just not answer at any time. goodness gracious this was a long ask haha hope it isnt too annoying

<3 w.a. 🐺

sorry it took me a bit to reply, i was fixing my theme ;n;

yeah, i figured it was because of the roles too. my friends and i still get taken aback when 3rd gen idols are the same age as 4th gen ones. in my head it doesn't add up sometimes. PLS THE RANT AT QUORA SKJDK tbh tho it's just going to be normalized as the years pass? esp that the boys are growing older and the amount of explicit fics will just increase. i might have to start blocking tags.

i had to look up the previous ask to remember what we were talking about xd i hope the events in champagne problems never happens to anyone. realistically, it probably happens a lot. damn i really won't wish that pain on anyone. dragging your brother into being a stay i whEEZED JFKSA additional noeasy music enthusiast o.o and ALL I CAN SAY WITH YOU GUSHING ABT FELIX IS AHA WHIPPEEEED OML can't blame you tho, i also want to hear felix sing more in other shades (if that makes sense HAHA) i really hope they'll do the role exchange in the next comeback :( or like in the near future bc i know they can do it :( the day i hear seungmin rapping it i will respectfully pass away. minho was given more lines this comeback thank fUCK i could rmb my irl being vocal abt her frustration. i don't get why minho barely has center time/lines in title tracks??? like the line distribution in the past eras just made me ???? if seventeen can balance lines with 13 members why cant a group of 8 do the same? moving on. i haven't watched the stray kids show simply bc i don't want to cry HAJS but i've seen clips. imagine if skz debuted without minho and felix?!?!? i rmb another irl catching bias feels towards changbin bc of the masked singer only to find out that the man's a rapper. i love how skz's vocals were highlighted this comeback :c there were a lot of mellow tracks! i find it cute when chan sings/raps bc it gets kinda obvious that he's a foreigner? the accent (im not even sure if it's the accent) it just shows. "putting off skz stuff bc of not having time to cry IS the kpop stan life summarised." CORRECT.

abt the twisted au o.O i'll inquire my irl if she wants to write it or not. if she doesn't want to, i'll do it. i miss writing twisted aus <3___<3 and i also miss going to the beach with my friends :' ) but it's starting to get cold here and i don't think i'll be able to enjoy the beach as much as i would if i went beaching in the summer. so maybe next summer? gone away really has an sm-ballad vibe. the thing about skz being a self-producing group, their songs don't sound like typical jype songs? and i just appreciate that bc in all honesty im not a fan of jyp groups at all. PLS the overthinking. i wish i could mute overthinking.

anyone who assumes kpop is just one genre obv hasn't listened to a single track. if kpop was just one genre why do i like some tracks more than the others??? oh you've only recently become a kpop stan? tbh im not a fan of the bright songs of bts either. i liked their older ones *chefs kiss* really matched high school vibes. yg has good artists and they're just wasting the talent ~.~ that strategy they have will get tiring eventually. people will stop waiting on blackpink and move on to newer more active groups ://

HAHAHAH yeah the 23 members is pretty overwhelming! it was the reason i didn't bother stanning before quarantine started. i don't regret stanning tho, met my ult bias in that group <3___<3 i don't really purchase albums unless i like the tracks xd ohhh getting into ateez just in time for the comeback! let me know what you think about them! i was fond of them at some point but grew out of it. good luck with memorizing enhypen! it took me a while to distinguish to people there XD i haven't checked out kard yet but chan plays their songs during lives and they're sexc hype music me likey *u*

i had to look up rsv im sorry. i'm glad you're recovering! please rest more and don't stress yourself out. bro i wish i could go to therapy too bc i have weird issues i can't justify and i need a professional to tell me what's the reason behind it. stuck with what condition btw? what happened? i'm sorry in case i just forgot. yesterday was a bit rainy for me too :(( it's not the type of rainy that makes me anxious so B) oh concert! good luck and i hope you'll be able to sing but i also don't think it's best for you rn :c what's your dog's breed? and yes i just finished drinking tea too. AAAAA i miss school dances :(( the last one i was supposed to have was cancelled bc of covid.

i was less productive today and i'm teetering between being mentally stable and becoming a hermit again. i'm anxious with a lot of things atm so like : D not the best state. today it was a bit sunny but not hot hot which was nice. i changed my theme today bc i couldn't wait for sept. 1st. and no i haven't found anything that makes me happy HAHAHA shit like that's hard to identify. don't have anything to say too, i'm just thinking about why i'm procrastinating too much atm T_T and i'm listening to this rap song atm and one of the rappers sounded like han.

it isn't annoying! i enjoy the long exchanges but i do admit it takes me awhile to type down a reply. so if i get more busy, it'll prolly take a bit longer for me to reply.

[isla-balfrey]

ask prompt!

I couldn’t add tags in the ask reply sooooo I’m posting it here! because I am a vain bebe.

ao3 link!

ask prompt from @faerieavalon! #13: Cole reads Lavellan’s mind.

Thank you SO MUCH for the prompt! 

This is set after All New Faded for Her. It’s follows story / dialogue (sorta).

ok pls enjoy!!!

-----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Sharp wind whistled through the Frostbacks, tempered by the clear blue sky of winter. Isla could feel the sun warming her cheeks.

She loved the battlements of Skyhold, and found herself there more often than not. It was a place for thinking. Today, Isla found her thoughts singular, and imagery from what was almost a dream clouded her vision as she leaned against the cool stone of the fortress.

Solas.

The Inquisition had not seen hide nor hair of him since the Spirit of Wisdom had passed on. He had been away for a fortnight, and his absence seemed only to focus her revery in his favor. Isla had found herself in the rotunda every morning, disappointment etching worry lines around pursed lips when she found it still empty.

She remembered the kiss, the way his hands had grasped at her waist, and the hungry feel of his lips. The kiss felt closer than the Fade, and closer still than the many weeks that had passed since she woke up in the dark of her tower bedroom.

Isla sighed, feeling the blush burning from her forehead to the depths of her hips. What she would do to kiss him again.

“Head dizzy. Heart dancing. The feel of his fingers. He misses you, too.”

“Cole,” Isla grimaced as she jumped, turning around to look at him, “remember when we talked about announcing your presence?”

“Yes. I’m here. I will try to remember. Josephine is worried you’ll fall.”

“Did she send you?”

“He’s come back.”

Isla froze as her heart leapt.

“Right now?”

“Yes,” Cole said, seemingly confused by the question.

Isla grinned. She patted Cole’s shoulder and dashed away.

----

Solas had just cleared the first gate onto the bridge to Skyhold when Cole appeared beside him.

“Hello, Cole.”

“You’re back. She is very happy. She’ll be waiting.”

Isla.

“I am glad to be back. You shouldn’t share those things.”

“Right,” Cole said, “I will leave. She… right. Don’t share those things. Goodbye.”

Solas shook his head as the strange spirit disappeared, clearing the gate into the yard of Skyhold.

Then he saw her.

Isla was gazing at him as she made her way down the stone steps, bright hair glowing in the sunlight. Solas had eyes only for her as they met at the foot of the stairway. How he had missed her.

“Inquisitor,” he said, resisting the urge to pull her into the tight embrace he had imagined only moments ago.

“How are you, Solas?” Isla asked, and he reveled in the sound of her voice.

“It hurts. It always does, but I will survive.”

Understanding crossed her features as she smiled sadly, green eyes boring into his.

“Thank you for coming back,” Isla said, taking a small step closer.

“You were a true friend. You did everything you could to help. I could hardly abandon you now.”

“Where did you go?” She asked, her smile widening imperceptibly.

“I found a quiet spot and went to sleep. I visited the place in the fade where my friend used to be. It’s empty, but there are stirrings of energy in the void. Someday something new may grow there.”

Isla nodded, stepping closer again. He could smell the soft musk of her skin.

“The next time you have to mourn, you don’t need to be alone,” Isla said earnestly, raising her chin as a blush crept up her cheeks.

“It’s been so long since I could trust someone,” he replied with his head down, taken aback by his sudden chagrin.

“I know.”

Solas looked up at Isla.

“I’ll work on it,” he said, voice quiet, “and thank you.”

----

From the stable, Blackwall and Varric watched the elves creep closer together.

“You’re going to be paying up soon, Tethras,” Blackwall said laughingly, gleeful at what he thought to be a certain victory. Varric only tutted in response.

When Isla and Solas made their way up the stairs without a single touch, Varric held out his palm.

“You owe me a silver.”

“How,” Blackwall grumbled as he pulled a coin from his pocket, “did you know they weren’t going to go at it as soon as he got back here?”

“Do you really think those two -- two of the most fiercely private beings that have ever graced the halls of Skyhold -- were going to announce their undying love with half of the Inquisition watching?” Varric chuckled, tucking the silver into his coin pouch.

“I guess,” Blackwall said, still looking miffed, “but they have to realize how obvious they are.”

“Maybe they don’t. We should remind them. Let’s go tease Moony about it,” Varric said, and they began making their way across the yard.

“You can take the lead on that one. I still find her more daunting than a wyvern.”

“Ha! She’ll get a kick out of that.”

----

Isla had said goodbye to Solas in the entrance hall, her self control spent after fighting the mad urge to kiss him for the duration of their conversation. She could feel his eyes on her as she walked away.

It wasn’t until she had shut the door that lead up to her chambers that she let her composure slip.

He’s back, she thought. Isla grinned as she darted up the stairwell. He came back.

[fanfics4all]

Found You

Request: Yes / No  I know you’re busy, and since I probably didn’t send this request I hope you don’t find it hard. Can I have a KJ x reader where the reader is kidnapped at a party and KJ does everything to find her and he does after a month. Lots of angst and fluff pls!! @river-fics

Request are closed <3 Have a nice day/night

KJ Apa x Fem!Reader

Word count:  2682

Warnings: Kidnapping, Rape/sex slave, starvation, dehydration 

Y/N: Your Name

A/N: I’m not tagging anyone else in this because I don’t want to trigger anyone

PLEASE DO NOT STEAL MY WORK, I WORK HARD ON MY FICS AND IT’S NOT COOL TO STEAL SOMEONE ELSE’S WORK!

If you want to be on the tag list for anything (My series fics, specific character fics, or just all of them) All you have to do is send me an ask and I will add you!

Masterlist

(Not my photo, credit to whoever made it!)

We had just recently finished filming the first half of Riverdale season three. We all were going to celebrate since we had a few week break. My boyfriend KJ was so excited for a party, he really loved them. Roberto had set up the party and it was gonna be huge. The girls and I decided to have a get ready get-together before the party. We all went to get our hair done, nails did, then we went back to Mads’ place and finish getting ready. I put on a black and white crop top, black skirt, my favorite pair of chunky heels, some bracelets, and I had my Michael Kors purse. For my makeup, I did a black and white eyeshadow look with a wing, and I decided to go with a soft neutral pink lip, instead of a bold red one.

Once the girls and I were finished we finished getting ready we headed to the party to meet everyone. I couldn’t wait to get to this party and just relax. Filming could be stressful and since we didn’t get too many long breaks, a party was just what we needed. We got there and it looked awesome! We were in the Playhouse Nightclub in Vancouver, it was so amazing. The music was loud, people were dancing, the bar was fully stocked, and best of all… it was all free! The boys noticed us almost immediately and came over to us.

“Hey babe, you look amazing.” KJ said and I smiled.

“You don’t look too bad yourself.” I said with a wink. He smirked and pulled me to him.

“How about we get you a drink?” He asked and I nodded.

“Yes please!” I said and he chuckled. The two of us walked over to the bar and got some drinks.

The night ws going amazingly and everyone was having a great time. Us girls were dancing while the boy were catching up with each other. I walked to the bar to get another drink when someone I wasn’t super familiar with came up next to me.

“Hey Y/N.” He said and I gave him that smile you give someone that you don’t remember.

“Hey, um…” I said trying to think of his name.

“Steve, I’m one of the writers.” He said and I acted like I knew him.

“Right! Sorry, I must have already had one too many drinks.” I said with a laugh.

“Don’t worry about it, how are you?” He asked as the bartender made my drink.

“Good, glad to finally have a nice long break. How about you?” I asked with a smile.

“Good, also glad to have a break.” He smiled back.

“So what’s with that guy over there?” He asked and pointed to a random guy. I turned to look at who he was talking about.

“I don’t know, but there are a few people here I don’t know.” I said turning back to him. I grabbed my drink and took a sip.

“So do you guys get the same break as us or do you guy have a shorter break?” I asked and took another sip.

“We get a few weeks off, gotta get those episodes written.” He said with a smile.

“Haha, true.” I said. The two of us talked for a little while longer and I felt myself start to feel weird. I put my glass down on the bar and grabbed my head.

“Whoa, you okay?” He asked grabbing me.

“Uh, yeah. I think the drinks are just hitting me now.” I said.

“Maybe you should get some air.” He said and I nodded. I went to go walk but it was hard.

“Here, let me help you.” He said and I gave him a small smile.

“Thanks.” I said and we walked outside. The night air hit me and it felt nice. However, before I knew it my legs collapsed from under me. Steve caught me and I felt like I couldn’t move.

“Finally, I thought we’d be here all night.” Some guy said and I saw two guy walk out from the club.

“The damn drug takes fucking twentyish minutes to work.” Steve said lifting me up.

“Damn she looks so scared.” One of the two guys said with a smirk.

“Come on, let’s get her in the van before someone notices.” The other guy said. They took me into a truck and I felt us drive off.

“Don’t worry hun, you’ll be well taken care of.” Steve smirked. I’m pretty sure he gave me a fake name. I shouldn’t have trusted him… but he was so kind…

A day later

I woke up naked and sore, what the hell happened last night? I must have drank too much, KJ and I must have had some fun. I tried to roll over so I could wake him up, but when I tried I couldn’t move. I looked up at my arms and saw I was cuffed to the bed.

“What the hell?” I said out loud.

“Look who’s finally awake.” I heard a familiar voice.I look at the door and saw the guy I was talking to last night.

“Steve?” I asked confused.

“You really think I would give you my real name? You dumb bitch.” He said and I was even more confused.

“What? What the hell happened and why the fuck am I cuffed to the bed?” I asked annoyed.

“Shut the fuck up, God all you actresses think you’re so much better than everyone else.” He said taking off his shirt.

“Good thing your family won’t give a shit where you are, not that it would matter. They wouldn’t find you anyway.” He said taking his belt off. My eyes widen.

“This is your life now. You’re nothing but a stupid slut for men to play with.” He said and finished getting undressed. He climbed on top of me and used me as he wanted.

KJ’s POV

I walked over to the girls that Y/N was hanging with and saw she wasn’t there. I looked around the club confuses.  I didn’t see her anywhere. Where could she possibly be?

“Hey, where’s Y/N, ay?” I asked the girls.

“I don’t know, she went to get a drink and never came back.” Lili said with a shrug.

“We thought you two ran off somewhere.” Ashleigh said with a wink.

“I haven’t seen her since you guys took her to dance.” I said and their faces fell.

“What? It’s been like three hours.” Vanessa said.

“I’ll call her.” Madelaine said pulling out her phone.

“It’s too loud in here, let’s go outside.Cammie said. They all got up and I followed them outside. She called my girlfriend and we heard her phone go off in the alley next to us. I walked over and saw her bag on the ground. I picked it up and saw her phone was in there along with the rest of her stuff, minus her money.

“Something’s wrong!” I said rushing back to everyone in a panic.

“Her money’s gone, but the rest of her stuff is in here.” I said and everyone looked at me worried.

“Someone must have taken her.” I said freaking out.

“Okay, let’s call the police.” Tiera said called the cops. They were here within twenty minutes and we told them the situation. They checked the camera and saw she was talking to someone, we saw that he put something in her drink. He made sure not to show his face to the cameras and he took her outside. He took her down the alley I found her stuff and that was the last we saw of them…

“Well he definitely took her.” One cop said walking up to us. The party was over and we were all freaking out.

“That was fucking obvious!” I shouted and Cole put his hand on my shoulder.

“They’re here to help dude.” He said.

“Whoever this guy is, this isn’t his first time doing this.” Another cop said.

“So what do we do?” Mark asked for me.

“Wait and see if there’s a ransom. She’s an actress you said? They’ll likely want money.” He said. I sighed and grabbed my head.

“I shouldn’t have let her out of my sight.” I said with a sigh.

“Hey, don’t blame yourself.” Luke said.

Y/N’s POV/ A month later

I’ve lost track of time. I wasn’t allowed to leave this room alone. I was almost constantly locked to the bed, in whatever position the three monsters wanted me in. They didn’t use protection so I was worried that I was already pregnant. They just barely fed me, and just gave me enough water to stay alive. I was in hell. I kept praying someone would find me and save me. It never happened… It would always wake up tied to the bed and wait for however many times they wanted to use me today. Please KJ, I need you more than ever right now…

KJ’s POV

It’s been a fucking month and I’ve only gotten pictures of her naked and tied to a fucking bed! That asshole was raping my girl and there was nothing I could do about it! The cops were working as hard as they can to find her. I was a fucking wreck without her. We had to put off filming Riverdale until she was found, none of us could work knowing she was being tortured by some shitty person. Charles and Cole had been staying with me for the past few days, everyone was kind of taking turns to keep an eye on me. I was a depressed mess without her, she was my world. She was in hell and I could do nothing but sit here and wait for something we could use to find her… Cole walked in with the mail and I noticed the familiar envelope that has become a routine at this point.

“Another envelope?” I asked with a sigh.

“Yeah…” He said and sat next to me. He handed it to me and I opened it to see another picture of her naked, this time she wasn’t on a bed. She was outside a house in the middle of nowhere… I shot off the couch.

“Where are you going?” Cole asked shocked.

“I know where she is.” I said and ran out to my truck. Cole and Charles followed me outside. I go in my truck and went to leave, but they stopped me.

“KJ, wait. We should bring it to the cops.” Charles said.

“You two can, I’m going to get my girl.” I said.

“Then we’re coming with you. I’ll call them on the way.” Cole said and they got in. I drove off and as promised he called the cops telling them where we were going. We obviously got there before them and I pounded on the door.

“KJ, hey what’s up mate?” Zach, a guy that use to be my best friend said like nothing’s happened. He tried to ruin my life when I started dating an actress, that he asked out but she turned him down and asked me out. I  asked him if he was cool with it and he said he was, turns out he wasn’t and tried everything to fuck with me. This was all before I met Y/N, before I even moved to America.

“What the fuck are you doing here?” I growled at him and he just smirked.

“I live here as you know, what are you doing here?” He asked crossing his arms.

“Give me my girlfriend back!” I shouted at him and he looked at me confused.

“You have a girlfriend?” He asked like he didn’t know. I pulled out the picture I got today and he raised his eyebrow.

“Why are you showing me your porn?” He asked and I glared at him.

“That’s my fucking girlfriend and this is your house. Where the fuck is she?” I asked and he rolled his eyes.

“I don’t have her.” He said and I shoved him aside. I stormed into his house and Cole and Charles followed me.

“KJ, we should wait for the cops!” Cole said.

“Y/N!” I called out to her.

“I told you she’s not here!” Zach shouted and tried to get us out of his house.

“Y/N! Where are you baby?” I called out.

“KJ!” I heard a muffled scream and rushed towards it. I busted open a door and saw a guy on top of her naked and smacking her in the face.

“You stupid bitch!” He growled at her.

“Get the fuck off her!” I shouted and slammed the guy on the ground. I punched him repeatedly and Y/N was crying.

“KJ stop!” Charles said and pulled me off him. I got him off me and ran up to Y/N. I unlocked the cuffs holding her and pulled her to me. I took off my jacket and wrapped it around her. She grabbed my shirt and cried into my chest.

“Shhh, it’s okay babe. You’re safe.” I whispered kissing her head. We heard the cops outside and I held her closer. The cops stormed in and grabbed the three guys that were in the house.

“Sir, we need to take her to the hospital.” One of the cops said to me.

“I’m not leaving her.” I said and picked her up.

“KJ, let them take her. We’ll be right behind them.” Cole said and I sighed.

“It’s okay..” Y/N said looking up at me. I sighed and nodded. They took her and we followed them. Charles and Cole called everyone and told them she was found and safe. They all came to the hospital and we waited till we could see her.

“Y/N Y/L/N?” A doctor said walking to the room.

“Is she okay?” I asked walking up to her.

“She’ll be okay. She wasn’t fed like a normal person, and she’s dehydrated. She’ll be okay though.” She answered and everyone sighed in relief.

“Can I see her?” I asked and she nodded.

“Room 203.” She said and I nodded.

“You guys mind if I see her alone first, ay?” I asked everyone.

“Go see her. I’m sure she wants to see you more than us.” Casey said with a smile.

“Thanks guys.” I said and walked to her room. I walked in and saw her laying on the small hospital bed with a small smile.

“Hey…” I said sitting next to her.

“Hey.” She said and her smile grew.

“How can you be smiling right now?” I asked her.

“Because, you saved me.” She said and grabbed my hand.

“This should have never happened.” I said with a sigh.

“KJ, I’m alive and with you again. That’s all I care about right now. I thought I was gonna die in that hell, but you saved me.” She said.

“I love you and, fuck, without you it was hell, I hated that I couldn’t do anything to find you…” I said and tears fell down my face.

“I love you too KJ.” She said and pulled me in for a kiss. I put all the love I could into it and she did the same. We pulled apart and I rested my forehead on hers.

“I’m never letting you out of my sighed again…” I whispered to her.

“And I’m not talking to random guys that act like they work for Riverdale again.” She said joking.

“You’re the only person I know that could joke after what you went through.” I said with a small smile.

“What can I say, I’m a tough girl.” She said and I nodded.

“I know, but you went through something traumatic…” I said and she sighed.

“I know… I’m just trying to push it out of my mind. I just want an okay day, or an okay couple of hours.” She said and I nodded again.

“Whatever you want babe.” I said and kissed her again.

[pooklet]

unaesthetic asks (anon edition)

i usually use a psd for asks to make them look nice and transparent and number them but tbh it’s just keeping me from answering asks quickly, having to shift layers around and stuff. so this is me literally cutting and pasting the text of some asks into a text post instead, sry.

if i did not answer yr thing here i lost/never got the ask, need a separate post to answer it (community lot anon), or worked myself into an anxious lather when i did not have an immediate response at the ready and fled into the woods to hide inside an old damp log and mutate slowly into a creature composed entirely of moss.

1) hey friend i think i can actually help with this one! slig did my poor lover for momma lisa, and has a few of my other skins linked to different body meshes in this tag here. @asimplevampire​ also did rehash for androgyny. those are the two i know off the top of my head but if anyone else knows any others pls reply to this post!

i don’t personally make showerproof skintones for body meshes because i a) am lazy and b) don’t usually take pics of my sims in the shower or naked in general so the occasional floating head just gives me a lil chortle when it does happen.

2) yis, it is the second to last one in this post by @magpieplayssims​ with a bunch of face masks piled on.

3) i use a personal edit of gunmod’s 3.1 A camera which alters the, like, central pivot axis so i can swing the camera underground into any basements i might be using. as a result, whenever i load the lot, it starts me off zoomed inside the floor, you just gotta zoom out with the scroll wheel to get above ground and it works normally from there. i haven’t figured out how to mitigate this while still being able to access underground rooms. which is why my edit never got its own post, but i did share it here.

4) nah, not really. i mean i have an outdated one at the back of my catalogue but my face is boring to me cuz i see it every day n stuff & i’m less and less interested in making human features now that custom sliders have let me go absolutely mad with power.

5) ye sorry i put that on my to-do list and promptly forgot about it cuz my brain seems to think that putting something on a list means it’s done forever now!!!! but now it’s actually done and i’m fixing the other links too.

6) yr phone is a craven liar and i will not stand for this libel. earlier today i was genuinely bewildered by a discussion about channing tatum cuz i thought his name was tatum channing. i sat there for minutes, convinced that there were two guys in hollywood one named channing tatum and the other named tatum channing and wondering if that ever got confusing for them.

7) u would be surprised, friend! my memory is a lawless wasteland but i do not end up chatting back and forth w/ many ppl b/c i am a seething pit of social anxiety. if we talked, like, more than twice, i probs remember u!

8) omg i was about to be like “nah i never made nosemasks for those” but that is a fucking lie of the highest caliber, i totally did make one (1) set and then forgot entirely about it. i will post them with the next batch of bodyshop content which should be Shortly (and if i don’t just yell @ me and i’ll just lazily put them on sfs and link them in a reply).

also thank u anon i am glad u like my content! :D

9) omg thank u so much anon that is so sweet of u to say!! truly i don’t feel like i have accomplished a whole lot beyond managing to snag @resurrection-failed​ but that is definitely the Best thing i could accomplish so i am 100% fine w/ that

10) oh ts4. i want to play it real bad but i have discovered that playing games that are still being updated and could break at any moment due to a new patch or ep gives me hives. esp when it’s sims games b/c those are held together exclusively w/ wishes and prayers as it is. they’re like the bottom panel of an expanding brain meme on spaghetti coding. at least when the game is Done there nothing else for EA to break (... right?). plus i only have base+pets and no money to throw at the other expansions so i could maybe download 1/10th of the cc available out there ¯\_(ツ)_/¯

but i am excited to be late af to the party. lemme tell u. thank u for saying such nice things, anon!! i hope u have a good day also. like, lots of ‘em.

11) hey anon! it’s built into tumblr’s text editor. u type the text first, highlight it, and click on the fourth button that looks like a slouchy figure 8 to insert yr link. i’m not sure if it’s the same on mobile, tho, cuz the tumblr mobile app is self-elected torture.

12) i do not right now but i can make one. idk if it would interest you but i am also doing a big ol’ blend of the hq eyes and wifezaya’s favorite ephemera mist eyes and will make a default version of those too when they are done.

13) nah i am still using my v3 texture for straight hairs and for waves or natural hair i just use nouk’s originals. i’m old-fashioned and boring. if u need help w/ making yr own, tho, i would suggest checking out @furbyq​’s tutorial here!

14) hey friend! i did have plans to do that, in that vague way where i have plans to do many things but most of the time end up taking a five-hour nap under a cat instead or watchin game grumps. luckily, @digitalangels​ is a doll and did it for me so consider this my official endorsement. i am pooklet and i approve this action.

15) hey anon. when did i call it that?? i think usually i just call it marriage or equal marriage if i need to specify (or gay marriage if i’m feelin Spicy cuz nonbinary-for-nonbinary is pretty gay). if i did say same-sex it was probs w/ implied air-quotes since that was the term du jour when we got married, which was 3+ years before the supreme court mandate, when it was only legal in some places and everyone was still ‘‘‘‘debating’’’’ the ‘‘‘‘issue’’’’ of queers gettin all married.

16) i been gatherin’ links for u anon but lemme look around a lil more. i will either give this its own post or add it as its own section in the resource post that is like .... five years overdue. meanwhile if anyone reading this has anything they either know is made for dark skin or works well universally or knows of a list like this that already exists, i would appreciate links!

17) I KNOW THAT’S YOU, AZAYA

[briteboy]

(circumstantial name by @earnoodle)

IT’S FINALLY TIME FOR THE POST YOU’VE ALL BEEN WAITING FOR (or maybe just that one anon)

there’s a LOT in here, newer questions are generally first so if you asked something a while ago and you’re only interested in that, scroll towards the bottom. also doing wcifs separately (errr i’m gonna try my hardest to ok don’t crucify me)

this mass anons post includes topics ranging from Very Sweet Things Said To Me That I Don’t Deserve, nitpicking stranger things, crying over ramona, lou theories, Cillian Is A Fucking Creep theories (true), and completely unhelpful reshade advice

let’s f0cking do this

You're right, apart from carrying his stupid brain, Santi's head didn't do anything to any of us. I apologize for anon.

I'm pretty sure I said that already but I love Rooney and Santi's relationship so much I literally have no words for it

ME TOO LIKE IT’S JUST SO PURE TWO NOT-KIDS SCARED OF THE ADULT WORLD TRYING TO FIGURE THINGS OUT WITH THEIR WEIRD BRAINS TOGETHER ;__; i love them

YO i didnt know u were a demigirl!! im a demiboy nb Buddies

hell fuckin yeah dude!! we are starting a demi club

Ok but like I really want werewolves. Like I know it sounds stupid but we have vampire and while yes I love my bat babes, I want a giant pupper friend. I have story written out and plans for a cabin to build. Now I’m waiting for EA to give me my big hairy babes.

DUDE i want more supernatural stuff too, mostly witches like I NEED MY WITCHES AGAIN!!! ts3 witches were so good. i didn’t like ts3 werewolves much but i feel like they’d be super cool in ts4, knowing how the vampires came out. i NEED it

hihi! i've been very quietly (??) following your blog for some time now and i just fawn over your characters way too much ?? anywho, i've been wanting to start my own little simblr story but ,, i'm not entirely sure where to even start? i have so many stories that i'd love to get out there, and i have the means.. butt, how did you go about starting out?? so sorry this is so long but i look up to you a whole ton!!! ty ily! :-)

i’m the (??) lmao that’s me always but ahdhghdfkshg thank you so much!!!!! i’m so glad you love them, it means the world to me ;-; and listen, that was me, i had no idea how i was going to do it because i’d only seen ts3 stories up to that point and i thought there was like a set Way to tell stories but i had no idea what i was doing so i was like y’know what...i’m just gonna do it how i feel comfortable doing it and i’m gonna figure it out as i go along. so honestly try to roughly plan out what your stor(ies) will entail and if you get stuck on planning and can’t figure it out, just jump right into it, try to make a few scenes or get the ball rolling somehow, even if it’s just random posts (i mean that’s all my blog was until i decided to commit to santi’s story.) it’s always gonna feel weird and awkward at first, but you’ll get comfortable the more you do it and it’ll figure itself out, trust me!

I read through most of your story posts the other day and now I’m rereading it again just to torture myself some more (and maybe catch up on some posts I may have missed). I honestly don’t think I’ve come across a sims story that’s so beautifully written & includes such evocative pictures as yours. I’m really at a loss for words, it’s all so stunning. & after a nearly two-month long creative block, it’s planted the smallest seed of inspiration in the back of my mind, so thank you for your art.

AHHHH AHSDHKGKDSJG WHAT!!!!! it’s always crazy hearing that 1) people actually care about my stuff, and 2) that it inspires them. like i really cannot believe that, stilL!! thank you so so much, i’m so happy you enjoyed it (as torturous as it was, lmao) it seriously warms my heart that you’re getting your groove back in the creative world, that means more to me than ANYTHING!! good luck with your art or whatever you decide to do with that inspiration!

 can i pls have your editing skill please and thank you

i owe most my editing at this point to reshade so honestly get reshade and u will probably become better than me

o added u on animal crossing and when you added me back i was so happy,, your little person is sooo adorable ((:

OMG!! thank you!! everyone’s person on there is adorable i cry i love them all so much i’m so mad tho it won’t let me add any more friends!!! it probably cuts off at like 100 friends or something STUPID

First of all, I love you. Secondly, I love your photos so much. I'm legit about to just ditch sims 3 for 4 now because of your amazing posts. 😖

LMFAO no but really THANK YOU I LOVE YOU!!! if you can manage playing both i admire u, i’ve invested too much time and effort into ts4 to ever fully go back to any other sims games tbh

The new patch made my game unplayable! I'm crying, I miss my doggos...

NOOOOO!!! hopefully by now you’ve found a fix, i’m prayin for u

long time listener, first time caller yoooo. i like everyone love your stories and your sim aesthetic so so so much and just tbh i was offended on your behalf about that ask from that person wanting to novelize your stories. like you were way too nice. this is your intellectual property and it's fucked up that someone would think it'd be okay to duplicate it as long as they used a different medium. this is prob a bad one to repost just wanted to you to know you're an awesome, singular voice

omfg lmao this is a radio show now *z100 voice* tellem why ya mad euhhh first of all i can’t believe someone even ASKED that, i’m in shock because like what this is so foreign to me. people want to write about MY characters WHAT! like that alone...takes a long time to process. and like i know i should say no but then i feel mean but they’re also my creations so like idk. it warms my heart that you feel so strongly and would stand up for me like that i’m cryin thank u for calling in i love u

I JUST FINISHED YOUR ENTIRE STORY AND I'M NOT OK WHO DO YOU THINK YOU ARE PUTTING ME THROUGH THAT SHIT IT'S AN EMOTIONAL ROLLER COASTER AND I FEEL LIKE YOU HAVE ABUSED MY (NON EXISTENT) INNOCENCE WOW

I’M SO SORRY U HAD TO GO THROUGH THAT ALSO I APOLOGIZE FOR STEALING YOUR INNOCENCE I NEVER MEANT FOR THIS TO HAPPEN OSDAFKJDSK BUT THANK YOU FOR READING I’M GLAD YOU ENJOYED IT EVEN IF IT HURT YOU!!!

I've been up all night and it's now 11am. I'm completely binging on your stories bc I am in LOVE and need a Molly in my game asap. Do you think you'll ever upload her?

omG my freaking story inciting insomnia i’m so sorry for ur sleep schedule first of all, but at least that makes you identify with santi even more omg tho ;___; (how many times will i say ‘omg’ i wonder) i don’t think so because she is so dear to me and makes my heart ache, she is just so special, i dunno if i could ever release her into the wild like that lmao. i haven’t even shared her with my friends (not that i really ever had a reason to) but like yeah. maybe in the future that’ll change but right now, no, i’m sorry <3

To change the topic: Idk if you watch stranger things but I only managed to get to episode 3 of season 2 before I stopped watching lmao it was so bad and Billy (a certified Cunt) ruined the whole show for me

YEAH I DID! omg. i have a LOT of issues with this season (mostly in how badly they tried to retcon nancy and everyone else not caring about barb’s death, how bad the writing was in the realm of nancy and steve breaking up and then her and jonathan getting together...holy fuck it was so uncomfortable with that 40 yr old conspiracy theorist guy i couldn’t even enjoy my ship getting together lmao) also ur right, max and billy honestly did not offer anything to the story...like i loved max too but what was the point...billy acted like their presence and the reason they had to move was so dramatic when it was really nothing...unless they’re saving that for season 3 but like. the whole situation with billy was so anticlimactic. he was like a walmart version of henry from IT. like boohoo ur dad’s an asshole and then he beat up steve. good character arc. i liked max standing up for herself but really...that whole thing was so lackluster, i didn’t care about it at all. ALSO I HATED THAT THEY DIDN’T LET MAX AND ELEVEN BE FRIENDS!! i’m sure it’ll happen in season 3 but like c’mon...that would’ve made the max character feel a little more important to the story. anyway yeah fuck billy and i don’t get why everyone is lusting after him or his actor they’re both ugly! thanks for listening

I just got the sims 4 + city living and I’m so excited! I was really inspired by your stories and style in general... I was wondering what packs do you have and also what are your favourite sims 4 hairs? I’m having trouble finding ones and I love your style!

YAY I’M EXCITED FOR YOU!!! omg aww it warms my heart so much when people say i inspire them because i never anticipated that kind of response, thank you so much <3 hmmm i think i have all of them except glamour stuff and fitness stuff. and pretty much all the hairs i download are here or here. (or the subsequent ‘tf’, ‘cf’, ‘tm’ and ‘cm’ tags as well, according to age)

UHM a 19 year old and a 13 year old? Poor baby Lou... Also youre a brilliant writer i cant

😬😬😬  stay tuned ajasdhjhjsahd thank you so much!!!

My stan levels for you have increased so much? like thanks for being a good ally, clAps for femmesim!

lmao thank you, i don’t really deserve praise tho i’m just passing on the knowledge of those patient enough to teach me. just trying to do what i can with my privilege u know. ily

How do you have teeth showing in so many of your pictures of Lou and Molly, do you PS them in?

i’ve gotten this question before and it’s usually just the poses used! i do have some lipsticks that have teeth on them but i mostly use them for just rooney.

Honestly, a fight between Santi and that new guy (srry, forgot his name while typing this) would be so hot. Like, I hope Santi would win but like just watching Santi fight him for Lou would make me happy!! Also, I live for your stories💞

omG i’m about to call up vince mcmahon they both need to fight on smackdown it’s gonna happen. they’ll both be shirtless too ok and THANK YOU ILY

boi poc can be PREJUDICED against white people but there is no such thing as reverse racIIIIIIiiiiIIIIIiiiIIIIsm

Lemme just say that you must be feeling so stressed rn. I love you and your simblr!!! Your posts light up my day!! <3333

OMg kind of. this week has taken A Lot out of me and i really just want to chill at home and play my freaking GAME but obligations. u know. here’s hoping i get a day off this week. i’m mad i’m probably gonna miss gianni’s birthday too (it’s on tuesday) and i wanted to do something for it!! i’ll probably do it late like i did last year too lmao i’m so sorry baby g ANYWAY u didn’t ask to hear about any of this...thank you for this sweet message i love you <3

why,,,, are people... coming to your blog to discuss race you are a fucking simblr WHAT

the real question is why do people go to you like its your job to educate them lmao like theres so many resources out there

SHAWDY u aint wrong reverse racism is literally a joke i am so sorry you have to go through all of this keep stepping on white feelings we deserve it

I was wondering would u consider Asians to be POC?

yes

I just finished Strange the Dreamer and it was fucking amazing. I cried so much and I laughed and I sat in absolute amazement at the world Laini Taylor has created. 100/10 would recommend

ahhhh i really need to read it apparently!! i’m like 10% away from being done with a dance with dragons (and then i have to wait for the next book like a peasant HURRY UP KING GEORGE) anyway this one is definitely on my list!

omgomg!! I just met this girl in my class who has eyes just like ramona's!!! But like instead of being brown w/ a little bit of blue, they were blue w/ a little bit of brown!!! Dude I was so shook I rlly didn't think ppl had eyes like that!

OMG!!!! that’s amazing! and yes heterochromia is a real thing haha. i’ve only met one person with it and he had the same color combo as ramona too, only his was full heterochromia, not sectoral.

*me in the background screaming* nO yOU LEAVE HER ALoNE baD-DAD-MaN!

ME TF TOO

every time i read some of your stories i get an ache in my heart that doesn't go away until i either cry or sleep so interpret that as you like

OMG ;_____; ok me too tho my heart literally hurts thinking about my characters sometimes...mostly santi...i hate him (no i don’t :{ )

hey uhh idk if you've answered something like this before but do you have a spotify or something bc your music taste is GOLD

THANK YOU!! you were the first person to ask about this haha and hopefully you saw my answer to the other question about it! i just made one and it’s here!

hi hi ! i’m seeing all the drama on da blog and i really want to read the whole story but i can’t get to it on mobile so i was wondering if you could link the beginning and tell me what the best order to read it in is ( i’m so confused because i’ve seen sm people y’all about a parallel story so idk if i’m being dumb !! ) i hope this isn’t any inconvenience also your sims are so beautiful sjajsjajs

hey on mobile the link is just: http://femmesim.tumblr.com/tagged/story/chrono i would honestly just recommend that order haha, it makes things simpler and it encompasses ALL story posts, or posts that give context. there are parallels in my story, lou’s is kind of a parallel of santi’s, only different...well...you’ll see. but yeah sorry this is so late! and thank you!!!

TU HISTORIA ES TAAAAAN BUENA POR DIOOOOS (YOURE STORY IS SOOOOO GOOD OMG) <3 <3 *OO* *cries in spanish*

MUCHAS GRACIAS ENCANTADORA PERSONAAAA <333

lou is wendy right? i mean, a wendy complex is someone who is overly mothering to partners, and lou is already a mother and ik that doesn't really count as foreshadowing but it seems like it could be a link to me. it'd make sense too, considering guys that go after younger girls (ew) are usually immature ie peter pan complex. it'd make the most sense that those two go together then.

heheheheh that is a VERY good observation...that’s all i’m gonna say!!

This has nothing to do with what's happening in the story rn, but whatever. I was wondering if you were going to mention lou's struggles with being a single mom and the stigma surrounding single motherhood? As a single mother myself I'd really enjoy seeing you take on the issue. Personally, my biggest problem was overcoming the generalizations people put on you when you're a single mom. People always assumed that I that I was stupid and uneducated because I had my son when I was 17.

yes! that will definitely come up. i will focus a lot on her struggles as a single mom. so far i’ve mostly just peppered in some stuff about money troubles, and that will come up again, and the issues you mention will be pretty central to her character as well. i’m sorry you have to endure that, it’s not fair. people don’t even realize how strong and dedicated single mothers are.

when you say Peter Pan, do you mean the Disney stuff or the og creepy stuff?

i mean the general themes of the story and how that translates into a peter pan complex: boy who never grows up, feels like he fits in more with younger people (haha...yikes), read the message above because that anon described the other half of the equation better than i could

Wait, hold up. That dude is cute but I feel like he’s coming onto Lou way too strong. I have a bad feeling.. Lou is like 13 there and he is 19 I mean I’ve seen bigger gaps between people, but she is not legal yet.. Where are you going with this? 🤨😅

yyyyyyep that feeling is warranted! i am going a way i don’t think you guys expect me to go...i think you’ll be very confused at the end of this part lmao. that being said, i’m not putting any of this in for shock value or to romanticize inappropriate relationships like this. (i’m probably going to be repeating that a LOT for this story but please just keep that in mind)

Hey mom wanna hear a fun as hell story? I just got back from the ER bc I fell on my razor after showering, and practically cut my nipple in half. (I am in so much pain hELP)

OMFG NO!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! YOUR POOR NIPPLE!!!!!!!!!!!!! I’M SO SORRY I HOPE IT FEELS BETTER PLEASE UPDATE ME ON THE NIPPLE STATUS

U gotta watch sense8!!! Apart from the v awkward sex scenes it's v good, has a lot of representation and shit Just watch that shit show, u won't regret it (And if you do I cut your throat oops)

i’ve heard it’s good! i remember when it first came out and everyone was like Wow The Representation so honestly anything with diversity has already got me hooked pls don’t murder me.

I'm calling it now. He's Fi's dad. and he's a FUCKING CREEP!! Bitch you are 19!! LOU IS 13!! BACK THE FUCK OFF YOU PERV!!

no spoilers or anything but honestly i’m with you @ cillian die

Are they gonna fucc, o no

right now? no. that would be Very Bad

bABY ITS COLD OUTSIDE

oh same

Hi ! Your lastest edit (graveyard girl) is truly amazing, how did you make that bokeh behind her ? 😱😍

thank you so much!!! it’s reshade (with matso DOF)!

You've probably got this question a lot of times but i can't find the answer for it. What reshade do you use?

i gotta add this to my faq, it’s one i created myself but i started out with this one (it totally doesn’t resemble that one anymore but i think it’s a good starting point)

how do you make good looking male sims? mine always look the same and kinda girly..

hmmm longer faces, prominent chins and jaws, smaller eyes, bigger noses...generally yeah

What do you mean 9 + alt?

you gotta turn bb.moveobjects on and then press alt + 9 when an object is selected to move it upward. so what i did with those poses i made was, i selected a teleporter and pressed alt + 9 until it was at a spot i liked on the roof. that’s why releasing those poses would be tricky, ‘cause every build is different so there’s no set way to place them, you just kinda have to play around with them

You mentioned GoT so naturally, I have to chime in and express my love for Jon. Honestly, he won me over ever since the first season? I'm at season 5 now and people have already warned me so now i'm silently weeping, waiting for something to happen to my precious bby help

JONNY BOY!!!!!!!!!!! i loved his emo ass since the beginning but his arc with qorin halfhand (was he in the show??) was probably the best arc in book 2 and then his book 3 arc was just...SO GOOD, SO MUCH happens to him and i just felt like i was watching my son go through it all...i love that boy so much ;-; i’m almost at the end of the last book and i’m scared for him because of the one spoiler i know lmao and you’re at that point too so GET READY we’ll go through it together ok

So there's this game I'm playing where someone talking about another character says 'maybe you can break him from his ouroboros of self-fladulation' (I know I probably butchered those spellings but I'm not a bright egg and autocorrect isn't helping rip) and tbh it made me think of Santi. (Also I'mma scream of you get this reference jsyk)

OMG THE FACT THAT YOU THOUGHT OF HIM ;-; and it’s okay u are the brightest egg in the bunch to me. I’M SORRY I DON’T GET THIS REFERENCE BECAUSE I’M NOT A VIDEO GAME PERSON BUT I’LL PRETEND I DO KNOW WHAT UR TALKING ABOUT anyway yes santi is currently in the process of breaking his self-flagellation and embracing the oneness of the ouroboros (as opposed to letting the cycle repeat itself until he’s worn down to nothing)

do you have any favorite pose creators?

answered

do you have any tips for taking good screenshots in game? like how to get the good angles and good quality? i play on ultra but i think when i zoom in and then use the arrows on my keyboard to move around, the pictures gets less clear and looks kinda blurry. how should i do this?

well if you’re already using ultra, there’s not much you can do lmao. sims 4 is just bad with textures in general. it also depends on the objects as well, some are better quality than others. if i zoom in far on a sim’s face, i generally know there will be some pixelation and i can clean that up in photoshop with topaz clean and the smudge tool. i am very reliant on photoshop sometimes lmao. it sounds like you already have the basics of taking good screenshots, it’s just sometimes you have to fight and work with sims 4′s less-than-hd quality.

burn it down by daughter reminds me of santi & i'm in pain

ouroboros!!! death! birth! death again! birth again rinse repeat! also santi breaking the cycle because third time's the charm

The tattoo is an Ouroboros. It originated in Egyptian iconography, and it symbolizes recreation. My boy's recreating himself, I'm so proud.

ouroboros, the dragon eating its own tail. it's a sign of eternal renewal

i saw the post of child molly and just started BAWLING i miss her what the fuck she's my fave character i'M CRYING

ME TOO BICH!! ME FUCKIN TOO!!!!!!!!!!!!!

i just read all of A Serious Case Of The Novembers so far and theres still tears on my face. some of the best stuff ive read in a while, great job on everything

THANK YOU SO MUCH!!!! ALSO I’M SORRY FOR MAKING YOU CRY

every time you write about molly and her in heaven it makes my heart swell, like the characters were answering asks and someone asked her what heaven was like and even though it was so small short lil answer it still pulls at the heart strings, basically what im trying to say is that your writing is so good! <3

omg ;_______; me too, i feel like she has such a simple way with words and although her descriptions of heaven are brief, they are also complex and beautiful, and even just writing it chokes me up ;-; thank you so much tho i’m so glad you like it!!

Molly: out Molly tatto: also out

why did this remind me of this post:

How did you edit in the fire in the last post? Looks cool

i searched things like “bonfire” and pasted parts of it that i wanted on the pic to make it look more realistic, then put a layer mask on the pasted pic and erased the edges and stuff to make it blend in better. the sparks and stuff i added by pasting it onto a new layer and changing the blending mode to screen! 

idk if you have every watched grey anatomy but Lou's backstory is starting to remind me of Jo (Jo is a character from the show) like Jo was in a abusive relationship and she is married to the guy but she cant get divorced or he will come and find her. So like if Lou didn't tell Fiona's dad he was a dad and Lou was married to him and cant escape the marriage (cause abuse), plus it would explain Lou's kink with being choked ;) full circle *god-like heaven music with tiniest violin is playing now*

ooh no i don’t but that’s interesting and i’m excited you even made a connection like that! i will say that it’s not lou who likes to be choked (the very opposite actually lmao) but otherwise the situation does kinda fit. i’m the violin

I have a freakin bio pre ap test tomorrow on photosynthesis and i have no idea what it is im going to fail save me

I’M ANSWERING THIS VERY LATE BUT I HOPE YOUR TEST WENT WELL!!!!!! *spongebob voice* photosynthesis

last time I installed reshade I couldn't get it to open the controls or shaders or anything in game :///// any tips?? I love they way reshade looks too!!

hmmmmm well i know the control panel opens when you press shift + f2, and then you check the boxes of the effects you want on them. i haven’t heard of this problem so i dunno what other advice to give i’m sorry :{ if it’s your first time installing it, you might have to wait a little to get it to load up.

Da puppy is so cute!!!

That dog and Romona are so adorable, I might cry

Ramona's cheeks are so big im in love

NAJKSDJGKJSD THANK YOU i love her and her chubby cheeks ;-;

OMG TOTORO IS SO BEAUTIFUL I LOVE GHIBLI UGH FKSJFJANFB

SAME!!!!!!! if i could only watch ghibli movies for the rest of my life i’d be totally fine with that

THE DOGGIE HAS EYES JUST LIKE RAMONAS IM GONNA FUCKIGN CRY

ME FUCKGN TOO!!!!!!!!!! it was fate (aka me creating the wolf pup to look just like her shh i am fate)

Hope I'm not bothering you but i wondered if you knew how to make Tamo sims eyebags work on a toddler? Do I just click in s4s to work for toddler on the "age and gender flags" when looking in My CC or do I have to do something a little more than that please? Thank you.

for any skin detail or makeup, you have to go into s4s and open the package up, go to one of the tabs (honestly i don’t remember which one because i don’t have it open rn lmao) and you’ll see the different age groups and you check the box for toddler. and then save it of course. (there’s probably a better guide on how to do this somewhere lmao)

Hey :) Sorry to take up your time, I was wondering if you use win7, win8 or win10? I'm trying to decide on one and people seem to have very strong feelings about it. Also what web browser do you use? I've used Firefox, but I had some problems on CC websites. Thanks<3

i use windows 10 because it came with my laptop lmao i honestly don’t know much about windows systems at all!! and i use google chrome because it’s never failed me (even though windows keeps pressuring me to use the new internet explorer called “edge”)

i just finished all of novembers in a sitting and 1. i'm Sobbing, 2. your music taste is bomb

THANK YOU!!! my music taste is like one part indie shit, one part rap and hip-hop, twelve parts emo middle school bands

what is the size of the original unedited screenshot?

1920x1080

For reshade when your first install and select the reshade you want to use do you have to edit the settings? Cause last time I tried to (I didn’t know what most of the things meant lmao) but it kept saying error or something so I couldn’t play the game so I ended up taking out reshade

do you mean the preset you want to use? i mean no you can just play with that preset, you don’t have to change anything about it. i’m not sure what you mean but i followed this guide for setting it up

Will you ever share your preset?? Or maybe a preset made be you??

i’ve answered this before but the answer is Maybe

Hi!!!! How do you make the rays of light you have in your photos?? THANK U BBY <3333

that’s actually in my editing tutorial but here you go <3

is reshade only available on windows + do we need to pay for it

yes and no

Hello love! I was wondering (and maybe it's a dumb question, idk) but what life span setting do you use? I would assume you turned off aging for your story but maybe I'm wrong ;w; Thank you!!

i do actually have aging off ‘cause i’m a coward lmao even in the ts3 days when i wasn’t doing story stuff and literally just playing i had it off for the most part and just aged sims up when i wanted because i like to be in control of Everything (aries)

I really just wanted to say that I’m new I your tumblr but your stories are amazing and I love them so much!!! Keep doing what you’re doing💞👏🏼

hey thank you!!! you are so kind and i’m glad you’re enjoying everything!!

In your reshade settings where have you set it to save your SS's to and which key please? I can't find mine after setting it to desktop/screenshots :(

i just set mine to ts4′s screenshots folder because it’s what i was used to and it works for me haha. hmmmmmm did you copy the exact address or whatever it’s called of your folder’s location and then paste it into the reshade box? try doing that with another location and see if it works. if anything you can do what i did ‘cause it worked for me 

ok SO i came across this music video for this like spanish/english speaking indie band called The Marías and the song was déjate llevar and literally everything about the music video reminded me of rooney and gianni

OMMMGGG i love this so much, i cry @ music suggestions and this is so them ;-; i think i’ve heard of this band before actually!!

a little life is going to fucking ruin you,,, just a warning

great! i look forward to it

can a steal ur talent

have it i don’t need it

What app are you using to make them cool edit things??

i tagged it but it was doodle face

omg Strange the Dreamer is so freaking amazing! It’s literally one of my favorite books of all time; You’ll love it. The writing is absolutely delightful

you guys are really singin the praises for this book!! i have so many dang books to read i swear

[buttercream-imagines]

I watched Joe’s live stream so you don’t have to (play by play reactions)

- announcement is a 24 hour livestream on ThatcherJoeVlogs on Friday starting at 6:00pm UK time (1:00pm EST) ft guests and Joe signing a lot of Username:Uprising

- I wish I had friends I could have a sleepover with and watch the livestream dude that would be so fun

- throwback to #1Dday I couldn’t even last seven hours with One Direction how the hell am I gonna do 24 hours with YouTubers

- just kidding I’m about to be dedicated as fuck

- Jack and Joe from 12:00-3:00 am

- #unpopularopinion I like Joe’s mustache

- my poor baby and his infected gums he was so ill he almost passed out whenever he ate cuz the pain as so bad fuck I want to hug him

- Joe speaking foreign languages is my aesthetic (and it reminds me that I really need to brush up on my spanish)

- “I’m trying to set up other things for the future cuz, you know, you never know how long this whole YouTube thing is gonna last before I’m back on the ol’ roof”

- “it’s getting to the point where I really do want a girlfriend”

- well I’ve always been at the point where I want to be your girlfriend so I don’t understand why this is such a predicament for you when I’m always available so quit complaining and hit me up

- no but really I want him to be happy and I think he would be so happy in a relationship so he’s just gotta get someone awesome

- (like I wasn’t mad when Caspar got with Maddie cuz she’s great so Joe needs someone great)

- main channel might become a lower priority in the future

- “And I’ll see you in the future with a Sugg Sunday Special. Who knows when it’ll be. I don’t wanna say that there’s gonna be an end to Sugg Sunday but... I don’t know. I’m not as fussed about that channel as much, which is a shame cuz that’s my main channel. I don’t know it’s been so nice to have a week [...] where I haven’t thought about that kind of stuff”

- obviously the idea of irregular Sugg Sunday Specials is sad but the idea of Joe putting out things because he feels obligated to and not because he enjoys them is even more sad

- “Wow that was deep whoa I went off! That’s what happens when Harry Styles starts playing music I start talking about proper stuff that I don’t normally speak about”

- yes, Harry Styles’ album was playing in the background throughout the entire livestream

- Kiwi is his favorite song (I shit you not that’s my favorite too it’s such a bop)

- serious Joe makes my heart feel warm

- he wants to raise a family in the countryside omg raising kids in the countryside he’s a country boy at heart

- “No iPads, no YouTube, no YouTube until you’re 12″

- “The dream is be able to have a lake and my dad can live in a little cave in the garden and look after the lake”

- honestly I love Joe wow

- HE DOESN’T LIKE THE WORD BUTTERCREAM GANG OR BUTTERCREAM SQUAD

- “We started it as like a little internal thing that we called ourselves and it spread and people call us the buttercream squad and I’m just like ugh it makes me like cringe out a bit whenever I hear it even though it’s what we call ourselves I guess. I don’t really call it that anymore”

- he starts the story of how they started to call themselves that at 28:38 of the video I’m not even going to try and summarize it ya’ll should just watch that bit

- okay but him, Conor, Caspar, and Mikey were the original four and that is so fucking random to me

- for some reason I just got really bummed out that he doesn’t like that name like okay Joe I literally have a blog dedicated to it so what the fuck am I supposed to do now

- he said none of them expected anyone else to start calling it that

- literally you’re all Internet sensations you should’ve known it was gonna get blown up when you gave yourself a name so honestly you brought this upon yourself lmao

- wOW MY HEART ACTUALLY IS BUMMED THAT HE DOESN’T LIKE IT

- also Byron is a member of their squad and literally none of us even talk about him/know him

- (side not Byron is hot as hell)

- I’m dead at how we all cling to whatever they say like the SECOND they tagged #buttercream on a photo we all went off

- I’m have an existential crisis wow

- “I just miss Jaspoli. That was my favorite, back in those days”

- I LEGIT THOUGHT I WAS GONNA CRY JUST NOW WOW MY HEART I MISS THOSE DAYS TOO JOE FUCK BRING IT BACK

- GO ON A JASPOLI TRIP PLS

- he wants a pet pig ??

- he’s gonna hang out with Brit soon !

- I ship him and Brit I have since the Jaspoli Coachella days (#unpopularopinion ??)

- literally the second I typed that he made a comment about it oh sorry sorry didn’t know that was a touchy subject

- reminder once again that I am single and available

- okay but they FaceTime every week for hours and that’s goals ???

- my jaw dropped at this bit he said he wants to stop going on nights out and start going to dinner parties and such, that he’s done with the night scene

- I thought he was joking but he was dead ass serious oh my god he’s growing up that felt weird to hear him say that

- “when the time’s right and it’s the right person” he’s a romantic person

- 52:58 through 53:05 is a joy

- “I’m a giver, not a receiver, take that as you will”

- he keeps getting shaky and he thinks it’s because he hasn’t eaten all day and it really worries me

- he’d like to live with both Oli and Josh (separately) and says that they’re both very mature

- his favorite YouTubers are the Sidemen and Caspar

- someone told him to collab with Kian and JC and he completely ignored it lmao

- HE SEES OLI AS A LITTLE BROTHER

- “I feel like I’ve watched him grow from like a little baby seed to like an oak tree. To see him do so well for himself now and he’s in a position where he’s just loving it and I’m so proud of him. I feel like a proud older brother and he’s said he sees me as like an older brother. We’ve had a lot of heart to hearts and stuff and he’s so good for advice. Even though he’s like my younger brother I go to him for advice a lot of the time cuz he’s been doing YouTube longer than I have and he’s just very knowledgeable about everything and he’s very sincere he cares about people a lot he puts others before him a lot of the time and he’s a genuine friend for life”

- THAT HAD ME SO FUCKING EMO

- it takes him a long time to open up to people, he’s usually quite shy when he meets people for the first time unless there’s that instant “chemical spark”

- he talked about being nice to people and compared life to climbing up a tree and how you should be nice to everyone you pass on your way up because if you’re not and then you start to drop, the people you pass won’t be there to grab your hand and stop you from falling

- in girls he looks for someone who doesn’t take themselves too seriously, not too obsessed about themselves

- obviously first attraction is important but ultimately it’s about the personality (said every guy ever tbh) and then mentioned how if looks are that important to you it means you probably care more about how other people perceive you and your girlfriend than how you feel about your girlfriend herself

- “I want to find someone who can only add something to my life. Someone who improves my life and makes me a happier person. At the moment I’m a really happy person so anyone who has that affect to make it better is the one for me”

- reminder once again that I am single

- like I’m not drop dead gorgeous but I’ve got some stuff to offer I have nice eyes and good hair and my personality is great aside from the occasional down periods due to mental illness but you know we all have our flaws

- he talked seriously quite a bit in the stream and I’m really digging it I like serious Joe

- someone asked for advice on having a crush on your ex and he talked about moving on because it’s probably not good for you but then he said “unless you think they were the one”

- one of the best relationships he’s ever been in has been with someone older than him

- “Maybe I need to go for a cougar. Any 40 year old ladies?”

- *awkward laugh* “I’ve just admitted to a live stream that I’m after a mum. No I’m only joking. Imagine that I could end up being your dad”

- Poop Scoop with Brit on Friday

- he’s in no rush to have children

- “I’m fortunate enough to act like an immature child and get away with it a lot of the time”

- he doesn’t really want to settle down/get married anytime soon because he meets new people everyday and the idea of getting really settled down scares him because he never knows who he’s going to meet the next day

- “that’s why I’ve never- well not that you know of- had any public relationships”

- what the hell does that mean Joseph

- “I’m very good at keeping it all under wraps”

- WHAT THE HELL DOES THAT MEAN JOSEPH

- he’s literally so hungry he’s shaking Josh hurry up he needs food

- “I hope Caspar’s there cuz I haven’t seen him in bloody ages and I miss the ol’ boy. I miss the bloody weirdo”

- he loves livestreams because it’s the closest we can get to all sitting in a room together and “having a good ol’ standard chit chat”

- reminder of the 24 hour live stream on ThatcherJoeVlogs starting at 6:00pm UK time (1:00pm EST)

- “New vlog soon. New gaming video soon. I’m back. Don’t worry I’m not going anywhere. I’m still loving life. And more importantly, you’re all bloody legends.”

---

that was a lot there you go (or you could just watch the live stream idk)

also I wish I knew people who lived near me 😭 I would so fucking love to have a sleepover and make good friends and watch Joe

[franeridart]

This might be too much to ask but I broke my laptop and only have access to mobile and I'm dying to know what I'm actually missing but I can't check would you be able to describe it? Sorry I know this is annoying ignore it if it's too much trouble

It’s not annoying so don’t worry about it, but my posts should all be visible, now? At least my app doesn’t give me the option to request a review anymore… if you can’t see them still they’re all (aside from the one I posted earlier) backed up on my wordpress blog! You can see them from there without me needing to describe them~

Anon said:Franeri-san what dimensions do you usually use for your canvas? When I draw I end up making the canvas too small, so when i zoom in to make details it becomes pixelated. But I also don’t need my canvas too big because I won’t be able to proportion it;; it’s a visual thing… Ah I’m rambling sorry <(_ _;)>

I use a 6000pxx5000px with a 4px brush, usually, but I really rarely use it all, mostly it’s just like, corners of the whole thing. I tend to draw a lot of things on the same canvas before switching to a new one - that said, personally I can’t draw properly if I don’t zoom in above 100% (usually I work at 150% or 200%, more for details) so I’m really not the right person to ask this haha

Anon said:I saw that profanity is now being blocked more heavily by safe search so our good, good but foul mouthed Baku may be the reason your stuff is hidden. You’ve probably already heard this but I thought I’d let you know~

Rip so I heard orz though let’s not give our Baku all the fault here, I swear a lot by myself too haha I’m my own ruin, seems like - thank you for taking your time to share the info, anyway!!

Anon said:I’m really happy about your blog not being censored seriously. CAUSE YOU MAKE WONDERFUL DRAWINGS THAT FILL MY HEART AND I WAS STARTING TO PANICK. Keep up the good work~. 🖤

And I’m really happy you can properly see my blog, you sweet sweet cute and adorable anon!!!!!!!!!! *O*

Anon said:Hello! First, I love your art and your headcanons and stories! I am in love with bakushima half because of you, you beautiful tart. Second, about Bakugo’s laugh, holy crikey, of course he’s loud and explosive. The boy is a ball of stress and anger and when he laughs for real, it’s rare and takes effort. But like, can you just imagine when his explodo-kill mask cracks his face turns red because he doesn’t want to laugh. But THEN he barks out a laugh and everybody’s stunned and then he just SNORTS

YES!!!!!!! Oh my god yes that’s an hc I have he definitely, definitely snorts when he tries to hold back his laughter it’s so effin adorable I die every day a lot bless that kid <3<3

Anon said:Who tops of in your opinion in Bakushima?👀

Maybe either, maybe neither, depends on many things but mostly on how I don’t ever ask myself this question for any of my ships so I got no answer for it at all ever - instead we should ask ourselves the important questions, like who opens the water bottles between them (Kirishima when Bakugou’s palms get too sweaty and Bakugou’s forever resentful about it), who kicks when they sleep and who always ends up sleeping on the floor because of it (Bakugou’s the restless sleeper, poor Kirishima), who takes way too damn long in the bathroom goddamnit Kirishima get out of there already I swear to go——-

Anon said:your blog makes me really happy just keep doing you you’re like the best thing

Thank you so much holy smokes!!!!!!!!!! *O*

Anon said:wait wait wait wait! is Bakugou the one teaching Shark Kirishima sign language?? then does that mean Kirishima learned to sign ‘I love you’ from Bakugou!? (Q/)////(\Q)

They’re learning together!! They have an online dictionary and follow online courses, so Kirishima kind of looked it up for himself at first - he was signing it as love instead of really like thoug, which made Bakugou indecently flustered so in the end, yes, he was the one to teach him how to properly sign it :D

Anon said:Will you still be updating this blog?

Sure will! The wordpress one is just a backup thing!

Anon said:wait so question: in the mer au, does kiri know jsl from before? because the way he reacted to bakugou first attempting to sign at him looked like he recognized it but you said they both had to learn? does he react like that because he recognizes it as bakugou actively trying to communicate? (btw this au is So Good i love how kaminari is just “why are you like this” at kiri but his Gay Ass cant be swayed)

I’m glad you like it!!!!! And nope Kiri didn’t know jsl from before, but mers do have something similar to a sign language (there’s deaf and mute merpeople too, after all) so he recognized it as Bakugou going “I want to talk to you and this is the best way to” - also, he’d never seen a tablet before and Bakugou was showing him an explosion on it to make him understand and instead he went “what is this SORCERY” and got excited about a gif. Good, pure kid. I had no clue how to add that in the comic in a fast way tho so let’s leave it at him being happy they found a possible way to communicate haha

Anon said:Hi Fran!!! Hace you reas the theoriws aboyo kiri o kaminari Boeing traitors? Si you know where they came up? I’m lil bit lost even tho I’m up with the man lmao ALSO pls more maki-chan

So pretty much at some point in the middle of a meeting Present Mic mentioned how there probably was a traitor between them that kept on feeding the villains infos about UA, and the fandom of course got interested in that!! Who could it be? They started thinking it through and for some reason the theories that ended up being more popular are about it being either Kaminari, Kirishima or Hagakure - I don’t think any of these are true, but if you google search “kaminari traitor theory” or the same with the other two names you should easily find the posts explaining the theories and where they come from, if you’re interested!

Anon said:omg fran i haven’t watched/read bnha but still solely bc of your art i am IN LOVE with kirishima. he’s such a pure being I feel like crying every time i see him??? like i just watched the first opening of the anime and you bet i watched the 5 seconds kirishima gets over and over. like all the bnha kids seem great. i am somehow extremely motivated to read bnha now thanks to your art. BUT OH MY GOD KIRISHIMA I LOVE HIM SO MUCH WHAT EVEN

You picked the best fave you could ever pick, anon!!! Kirishima is the BESTEST boy, purest and brightest and energetic and actual sunshine and also super strong and resilient and kind of an ass now and again but in a good way he’s GREAT I’m IN LOVE with him good job your intuition is perfect

Anon said:THE MER AU WAS THE CUTEST THING EVER I LOVE SHARK KIRISHIMA AND THE TAGS ALL GAVE ME LIFE

GLAD YOU LIKED IT OMG!!!!!!!

Anon said:I love all your art, but especially all your self indulgent stuff bc first off HELLS YEAH DO THE STUFF THAT MAKES YOU HAPPY and another is it feels like self indulgent stuff for me but I’m not the one making the thing… So like… It’s Good™ BUT YEAH ANYWAYS I LOVE YOUR ART AND YOU AND YOUR ART MAKES ME HAPPY TBH I HOPE YOU’RE HAVING A LOVELY DAY

AAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH THANK YOU SO MUCH also this is super nice to know because sometimes being self-indulgent is all I can manage to do haha r i p but at least now I’ll know you, for one, will like it!!! That’s nice!!!!!!

Anon said:If you were ever bored and wanted to do more of your mershark au thing I wouldn’t be mad at all ! 😝 your art is so cute and easily recognizable and I really enjoy it! Stay beautiful lovely Fran!

!!!!!!!!!!!!! thank you!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! And I really, really think I will!!!!!!!! :D

Anon said:I bet if denki tried to do the “if i jump at ______ they will most certainly catch me” with bakugou, bakugou would just let him fall

Oh my god no Bakugou’s reflexes and instincts are too fast and automatic the actual reaction at seeing someone run and jump at him would be without thinking trying to explodo-kill them don’t jump at him Kaminariiiii

Anon said: What to you think of a school dance bnha concept thing???

I read a bakushima about it once and I DIED so actually A++++ great perfect amazing concept I love it

Anon said:I gotta know,what do you think of the “Dabi is Todoroki Shouto’s brother” theory? i personally feel like that 1’s the most likely theory to become a legit thing but im curious

I talked about this on my main just the other day!! And added something about it earlier through another ask! But generally I think it’s believable, and I wouldn’t mind it being true :D

Anon said:But, what are your feelings about this chapters? And Kirishima? God, I love him even more and want him to be happy, but Im also dying to know what happened to him in his past!!

I CRIED I love that boy so much I swear it’s getting ridiculous I’m so so proud of him and how far he’s come and I just want him to be happy??? I do want to know his past tho!!! I’ve just been asking for this for, like, eight months!! I hope next one will be the one I’ll finally learn about my child tbh ;–;

Anon said:Fran you should totally do bnha and haikyuu calendars

………………..boi that sounds like a lot of work, anon. Like, it’s an interesting idea, but also my lazy ass is telling me no way no what the heck go to sleep instead r i p

Anon said:Have you ever thought of an eraser mic fusion?

I’ve drawn it already!!

Anon said:fran i?? i love the way you draw smiles?? idk i was just going through your art and i realized that holy SHIT i really love the way you draw smiles. like each smile is different and has its own specialty. esp bakugo’s smile I LOVE HOW YOU DRAW HIS SMILE!! like usually it’s not really noticeable but then there’s that slight quirk of his mouth (see what i did there?) and it’s so perfect. idk dude i just REALLY LOVE THE WAY YOU DRAW SMILES

THIS IS SUCH A CUTE ASK I DON’T KNOW HOW TO ANSWER HELP ME !!!!!!!!!!!!!! thank you????? so much??????? I’m glad you like them cause honestly I love drawing people smiling and laughing, it makes my heart smile too~<3

Anon said:Theres a bnhaStuck blog in the works ;)

That’s? Nice! I guess!! I hope whoever’s working on it will have fun with it!!

Anon said:Fran this last BNHA chapter hurt so bad. And then I saw your mer-Kiri and it cheered me up!

Ahhhhhhhhhhhhhhh!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! I’m glad I could cheer you up cause honestly I felt that pain a whole damn lot too ;A; let’s hope Kiri won’t have to suffer much more in this arc #sob

Anon said:im crying fran, my hard bby kiri in the latest chap,,, my baby boi, i know that i wanted to know more abt him but,, keep my baby safe pls oh goodness gracious… (and as usual ur bootiful art keeps me alive)

I mean nearly all the character arcs we got are damn sad so it was obvious Kiri’s was going to be too, but still ;A; don’t make him suffer too bad Hori I beg u ;A;

Anon said:*takes deep breath* I FUCKING LOVE YOU SO MUCH THANK YOU FOR MAKING QUALITY ART OF MY FAVOURITE SHIPS YOU ARE SUCH AN AMAZING PERSON AND YOUR ART IS VERY PRETTY AND I JUST WANTED TO THANK YOU FOR EXISTING IN GENERAL BYe

THANK!!!!!!!!!!!!!! YOU!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! SO MUCH OH MY GOD!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! AAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Anon said:!!!!!!FRAN!!!!!! YOUR MER!KIRI AU!!!!!!!! AHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!

!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! :D I’m glad you enjoy it!!!!!! 

Anon said:I love your work 😍. You are the only one who makes comics About my favourite ships. I check your web everyday If you post something new. My fav ships are I.waoi, bok.uroo and bak.ushima. Love your work 🙂

Ahhhhhhhhhhhhh thank you!!!! holy smokes!!!!!

Anon said:Do you have an OC for Boku no Hero Academy?

The closest things to bnha ocs I have are the fusions, right now, but there’s a couple of asks in my inbox about a bkkr kid… soon……..

Anon said:Quick question, I want to read haikyuu, I’ve watched the anime already and I was wondering how close the anime follows the manga, like how bnha is basically identical, is it the same? Or is there a bit of difference *^*

I’m SO SORRY THIS TOOK ME FOREVER TO ANSWER - I bet you already found your answer elsewhere, but anyway the anime is pretty much exactly the same as the manga!!

Anon said:Back on the topic of hq!!! I find it funny how people ask about bok.uroo so much as if you dont like them anymore when they’re literally still your header, like if you didn’t care for them they’d think you’d change it to bakushima or something

I’ve literally thought about changing my header so often but then I look at it and I’m like….. my kids………… I can’t do this………………. not yet…………………. same for my icon tbh haha I love them too much rip

Anon said:Okay but what if Kirishima makes a really stupid pun and Bakugou just turns away with a curse and he’s just covering his mouth and quietly giggling into his hand because even he can’t believe he found that funny, and that is SHAMEFUL. And Sero in the distance is just looking at him, all disappointed. Quietly judging the fact that Kirishima and Bakugou are practically meant for one another.

You wanna know the best thing the absolute best thing? My very first bnha comic was something eerily similar to the first part of this ask! Only Bakugou was the one to accidentally make a pun - I’d link it but honestly my style was ridiculous back then so not happening, just know that I’m 100% sure that post is the reason why I keep on drawing bnha comics about puns, my very first post set the path for all the others to come hah a curse I don’t actually mind

Anon said:are you planning on starting another series? like the bokuroteru tattoo shop au you did (it was real dandy and rad) it was what made me find your blog, so i was wondering if you have any future plans for anything similar. i really like your blog lots, i hope you have a nice day!

Right now I don’t actually have any idea orderly enought to make a proper series out of it, rip - maybe in the future, tho! That one comic was fun to make, after all!! And thank you!!!!!!!!

Anon said:IM HARDCORE IN LOVE WITH TODOSHIMA THANKYOU SO MUCH FOR RUINING MY LIFE❤️❤️

I’M GLAD YOU LIKED HIM OH M Y GODS!!!!

[briteboy]

MORE ASKS I’VE BEEN IGNORING!!!!!!!

GET ‘EM WHILE THEY’RE HOT

P.S. ALL OF U WHO SENT ME THE CHAIN THINGY ILYSOMUCH 

Why is her step-douche such a foken piece of shit? omg i hate him

some mysteries are never meant to be explained tbh. why is he so ugly and evil? who wronged him? but also who cares he’s in jail forever now good riddance ugly

I know this is probably really bad, but after I saw the newest molly posts, I thought of that video where the little girl is yelling "MISS KEISHA, MISS KEISHA, oh my fukin gosh she fukin dead"

OMFGFD I DIDN’T KNOW WHAT THAT VIDEO WAS SO I JUST WATCHED IT AND I’M LAUGHIN

i don’t blame u i bet when it happens i’m gonna be like “u know she ded”

(To the previous anon) i agree with you so, so much! In Poland, these dumbass politicians are letting shooting pregnant bisons (?? Im not sure how they're called) become legal. Like BITCH WHAT. Can you imagine??? A fucking pregnant lil' cow getting shot????? I feel Molly's pain on an emotional level rn (sorry if this is too nsfw, just needed to get that outta my system...)

i think this was in response to someone saying that hurting pregnant women is one of the worst crimes but um WTF shooting animals at all makes me itchy but pregnant ones..............nah that’s......nah

it’s ok get it outta ur system i’m here 4 u

the first thing I check in the morning is your account.... you have me whipped! ;|

OMG WHA LMAO REALLY that’s wild. i feel like i’m the only one who looks at my page which is dumb but like idk i still feel like a little kid that no one cares about lmao. but then you guys exist and amaze me with your responsiveness every day and i just ;____________; ily all

hi Sunny. first of all i'm gonna say i love your story and your editing style so much! your blog is goals like literally. i need an advice if you don't mind. you always find such amazing angles for your pictures while mine are so boring. any tips or tricks you can share?

HI thank you so much ;-; sooooo i’ve been thinking about this question the past couple of times i went in game, trying to figure out how to describe how i take pictures. for one thing i live in tab mode lmao. meaning you press the tab button on your keyboard to go into camera mode and get all these sexy angles and super zoom and stufffff. i almost always zoom in super far idk why. so there’s one tip. i honestly just play around with going up and down with the q and e keys (i think?) until i find angles i like. i take a lottttt of pictures with so many different angles just so i have a lot to choose from. basically i try to focus on different things in each picture in order to get a mix of the most diverse and dynamic shots possible. you just need to experiment and get creative. i know that’s the most vague advice ever but really just try a new angle that you’ve never considered before and i bet you’ll get cool results. an interesting setting is also the biggest factor, because certain objects and their placements will give you interesting results. 

i honestly want to print out your reaction pic to that one post and just hang it on my wall, put it in my heart locket necklace, stamp it on people's faces, start an email thread with it. i love it.

an add on to the last ask i sent about your reaction pic. i've been looking at it religiously since it was posted, and i dont regret a minute of it. LMAO I'LL STOP NOW.

SAKJDLJKGKSDAF STOPPPP LMAOOO i looked so ugly but that was my pure unadulterated reaction to that question and i trust you all to not judge my ugliness and instead share this reaction with me. i’m glad u liked it that much, i just printed it out and i’m cutting it into a small heart to put inside ur locket ok

everytime i hear cigarette daydreams by cage the elephant i think of a serious case of the novembers like its so fitting and then i get all emo when i listen to it lmao rip

OMMMMGGGGGGG YESSSSS how have i never made that connection before honestly. cage the elephant is one of my faves and i’ve seen them perform twice actually!! i’m watching the music vid for that song now and even that reminds me of my story ;-; i cry

thank you for sending this, and also i cry @ the fact that you used the actual title *dies* now this song is gonna make me emo til the end of time thx

i might sound like some crazy stalker fan but i just want to say you are so freakin awesome and nice and funny and cute and (i can go on forever) so caring! i love your blog so much and all the hard work and care you put into all your posts and followers. thanks for making my day and making me smile so much. you have no clue how much i look forward to seeing your posts and your hilarious hashtags and answers from asks and AMAZING story posts. im sorry i just wanted to let you know ur awesome ily

OFMG WHAT!!!!!! I AM ONLY AN EEL!!!!!! but no you don’t sound like a crazy stalker, i actually love this, you’re too sweet, thank you ;-; i’m just blushin so much reading this omg. YOU EVEN LIKE MY TAGS WOW that’s true love. ily ;-; <333

how do you get your sims' facial expressions to line up with your scenes? I feel like my sims' faces are never right :(

tbh i just use a lot of the same neutral poses...my go-to’s are @helgatisha‘s poses lol. they’re the easiest to work with when i do just plain talking scenes, and often i tweak my sims’ eyebrows and mouths with the liquify tool if i want them to look a bit more concerned, sad, mad, happy, etc., it works like a charm!! i also tend to play around with angles, you’d be surprised how much a different angle can enhance a scene.

Hey smol bean, I'm sent you an ask and now I feel bad that it probably made you feel anxious because you didn't answer it. It was the one about you not liking my posts, I have anxiety too so I'm sorry If I made you feel sad. I think I'm just looking for validation from people I look upto you get me? Anyway sorry again, don't worry about it! Love you!

hiya bb, i know you saw my answer to your original post (and i’m sorry it got some negative attention, i didn’t mean for that to happen by any means) anyway don’t sweat it, and i really appreciate this follow-up message. you didn’t make me feel sad, i just wanna know what i can do. it’s just a hard question y’know. i understand what you mean, i think everyone wants validation to some degree. tbh you can just come off anon and message me, i promise it’s not as nerve-wracking as it seems! ily

How did you make Santi's tattoos? I want some like that for my Sims but idk how to do it

boop

I HAVE A FEELING THAT MOLLY IS GOING TO DIE DURING THE BIRTH OF THE BEAN OR IT HAS SOMETHING TO DO WITH HER STEPFATHER FINDING OUT ABOUT THE BEAN

WELP U WERE RIGHT ABOUT ONE THING

how did you make your characters page on your blog like that?

uoohhh like what?? i used this theme (monolog) if that’s what you mean aheh. here’s a guide on how to use custom page themes

okay so THIS IS MY THEORY: they might keep the baby and molly might actually carry it to full term, but then the kid dies in childbirth and either molly also dies or maybe kills herself or gets killed later? or maybe she's still alive but just won't speak to santi anymore cause she like can't look him in the eye after all of that or idk?? since ppl were sending theories i wanted to add mine lmao. another possible theory is that the stepdad finds out and kills her but thats TOO DARK omg

TOO DARK U SAY...WELL!!! it’s not AS dark as you guessed but only marginally

If Molly turns out to be alive and raising their kid alone (though from what I'm seeing in response to most questions I think that may not be the route) am I allowed to slap Santi (unless Molly didn't give him the option to help) because raising a child alone is not easy I've watched my mom do it for years.

YEAH i would give you permission to slap him lmao he would be a grade A piece o’ shit if that were the case. i would never ever write that tho because santi does own up to his actions if they’re that detrimental. his altruistic nature, no matter how backwards, would never allow him to do that.

There will be complication with the abortion so she will not be able to carry a baby anymore and she's going to kill herself OR her step dad is going to find out and he'll beat her to death. And in both situation Santi his blaming himself because he wasn't there at the right time... Okay I really really hope I'm wrong now !

I don't even follow your story very closely but every time I see your posts my heart hurts.

OMFG...that’s how u know the pain is real

but like wow my stuff is really so visceral that even my apathetic followers can feel the hurt...that’s real...that’s real my guy

omg!! you should 100% play or at least watch a playthrough of life is strange! legit the best game ever made, its so beautiful. the storyline kills you a thousand times over (much like your beautiful story) <3333

yaaaa i’ve heard lots of good things about it!! my bf played it actually, maybe he’ll revisit it again someday and i’ll watch him do it (i’m only a fan of video games if i can watch them like a movie lmao) thank you btw <3

I am shook and I worship you and your story and you are amazing WOW BYE

WORSHIP LMAO WHAT!!! PLS I AM UNDESERVING...ily tho don’t worship false gods

Do you let Molly and the younger versions of your characters frolic around your main save or do they have a separate one?

UM YES LMAO because i didn’t even know you could have separate saves until after i started the flashbacks lmao i’m...a noob. i don’t want separate saves anyway because 1) it’s too much of a hassle switching back and forth and 2) it gets too confusing for me and i’d be afraid of overwriting one save with another and NOPE too much anxiety for that soooo yeah there’s three santis in my game: child, teen and adult lmfao (fun fact: teen santi’s name is literally just Lil Santi)

I made it to my senior year with 6 A's and 1 B ... Be proud of me too? 😂 Lmao I told this to people and some of them were just like .. okay cool?! LMAO it's so funny but also kinda sad

I AM PROUD OF YOU TOO!!!!!!!!! my smart childrens

“okay cool” UM PLEASE that’s a feat...at my school if you got an A in a class in senior year you were allowed to be exempt from the final. so yeah that rules. ily