#so I'm rubbing my trans hands all over this show and no one can stop me!!!!!!!!

[outatmako]

anyways here’s my incomplete list of reasons why trans boy Lewis just makes sense to me:

when he swims he wears a full rash guard, and he never goes shirtless, despite the fact we see other boys on the show shirtless

the one time we see him shirtless, in 2x01 (so not exactly his choice) he has his arms crossed over his chest the entire time -

he is pretty blasé when Rikki and Emma claim to be naked, almost like he’s used to sharing locker rooms and such with girls/women and is thus not bothered

similarly, is often wanting to sleepover with the girls on the full moon to protect them, but again is doesn't seem bothered about the implications of a co-ed sleepover, almost like he’s used to sleeping over with girls

he has an inherent understanding of the importance of keeping the girls’ secret, unlike Zane who needs the consequences shoved in his face. Lewis gets it immediately. almost like has his own secret, his own difference.

everything about the way he dresses has mega transmasc energy. it just does. the short sleeve button up, baggy cargo shorts combo? Faded graphic tee + frayed jeans + off brand vans? some stupid fucking hat?

that one scene where Cleo’s dad is like “the male of the species is predatory” and Lewis just gives him a blank stare and asks if he wants a biscuit. that hypermasculinity bullshit flew right past him.

this one requires us to accept Rikki is bi/queer, but that doesn't strike me as controversial. same taste in music as Rikki, meaning he probably listens to alternative rock and punk music (knowing Rikki). Very queer genres.

I'm transmasc and I said so

[froggywritesstuff]

dysphoria | angel dust

ship/pairing: Angel dust x trans!male!reader (reader has a uterus and still gets his period)

fandom: Hazbin Hotel

request: Can I request Angel Dust comforting his trans boyfriend when he gets his period and is extremely dysphoric and depressed about the whole thing. This whole week has been a shit fest of dysphoria and crying.

warnings: maybe ooc idk , I didn't clarify in my writing but first confession of love i guess, periods, gender dysphoria, swearing, crying, emotional breakdowns, petnames (reader gets called baby), rushed ending, bad sex joke

word count: 758

A/N: sorry this is really short i have zero motivation to do anything 👍 fem and cis readers dni

You didn’t even need to tell Angel what was happening, nor did he need to ask. The second he saw your face contorted into one of discomfort, he was all over you. He hung up a dozen ‘do not disturb’ signs on your hotel room door (though it was basically a shared room at that point), prepared to verbally or physically attack anyone trying to disturb you. Before you could even mention cramps he had a heat pack fresh out the microwave for you, checking every five minutes if it was still warm or if you wanted it reheated. He would cuddle you tightly, him and Fat Nuggets doing their very best to cheer you up. Angel showed how much he truly cared for you. You couldn’t ask for a better boyfriend than him. However you felt nothing he could do would make the dysphoria you felt go away. He’s an amazing boyfriend but unfortunately he can’t stop your period or give you a dick. (he could do the second one if you asked him nicely)

”Ok I think this is all the chocolate in the entire hotel, I refilled your water, and I got you some of those snacks you like.” Angel listed as he sat on the bed beside you, dumping the food in your lap before readjusting the pillows wedged between your head and the wall, wanting to make sure you were as comfortable as you could be.

”Ange, you didn’t have to do all that.” you mumbled despite knowing it was pointless and he would continue to insist on helping you. 

He pulled you closer to him, letting you rest your head against his shoulder, “I told you it’s fine. I want nothin’ more than for you to be happy.”

You lazily snuggled up to him. Dealing with your period and the gender dysphoria that tagged along with it tended to drain your energy, "Thanks. I really appreciate you helping me with this."

Angel's arm snaked around your waist, holding you close to him, "Of course baby. But of the list of things I'd do for you, this is pretty mild. If your period was a person I swear I'd fuck 'em up real bad. Make 'em regret ever makin' you feel this way."

You couldn’t tell if it was just your hormones going batshit or not, but Angel’s words had you burst into tears. You quickly buried your face in the crook of his neck as he pulled you into a tight but comfortable hug.

”You’re ok babe, I’ve got you, just let it out,” his whispers comforted you as his hand gently rubbed up and down your back soothingly, not even caring that your tears were staining his shirt. 

Shaky breaths left your lips as you cried, “I'm grateful you're helping me. But I hate this. I hate my body. I hate it so fucking much.” your voice cracked as more tears rushed down your face. Angel was quick to pull out of the hug and cup your face, his eyes on you as his thumb caressed your cheeks. “It’s not fair.”

Tears brimmed Angel’s eyes, his heart breaking at your words, “I know baby. And you're right, it’s not fair. And you don’t deserve to feel this way one bit.” he pressed his lips to your forehead, “You hear me?" you gave a small nod as his thumb wiped away your tears, "And you're not your body. You're the hottest, the funniest, the kindest, the strongest, and the most handsome - yeah you're the most handsome and hottest man I’ve ever met, who also happens to be the best boyfriend in the world. And I wanna do anythin' to help you with this pain."

A small smile grew on your lips as you listened to him. He was so genuine and sincere, a big contrast to his usual sarcastic and snarky demeanour. On a day you felt like dying only he could make you feel like living, "I love you. So much."

He smiled ear to ear, feeling his heart swell at your words, "I love you too baby." he handed you one of the snacks he had brought, "Do you wanna eat something? And then you can talk more about what's botherin' you, or we can watch movies, or we can just nap. Whatever you wanna do."

You nodded, taking a bite of the snack, "That sounds good." Angel shifted on the bed so he was beside you again, one arm around your shoulders, while the other wiped your remaining tears.

[adh-james-version]

Canines Pt. 2

First Part

trans!barty

"Bite me."

"Wh-what-" "I said bite me. I wanna feel your teeth." Barty said breathlessly pushing his lips against Evan again. Evan sat up against the headboard pulling Barty's with him as they kissed. Barty looked like he was feral, he was grinding in Evan's lap and licking all over his teeth.

"Woah, baby, woah." Evan said pulling Barty back so they both could breathe. Barty kept his hands near Evan's mouth, transfixed by his new look. "You said you wanna feel me, yeah?" Barty nodded furiously and went in to kiss Evan roughly. Evan let Barty's kiss him before he pushed him back a little before twisting them around so Barty was under him. "Words pretty boy." "Yes, yes, please I wanna feel the teeth babe."

Barty's mind was so clouded with lust that he couldn't think of anything besides wanting to feel Evans teeth on him. I was extremely wet and he felt like a bitch in heat. These sharp teeth brought out some primal instinct that that Barty couldn't understand, it made him want to js have Evan leave teeth marks all over his entire body, and he mean his entire body.

"Okay then, love" Evan smirked before pulling a hair tie off of Barty's wrist to tie his Blonde dreadlocs out of his dark chocolate face. He slid Barty's shirt over his head and kissed down from his chest to his stomach, simultaneously pulling his boyfriend farther down the bed. HE reached the base of his stomach, where he pulled his shorts down with his teeth. He pulled Barty's boxers off and pressed two fingers into his soaking folds slowly rubbing.

He looked up into Barty's eyes, "you still want my mouth?" "Mmmmm- fucks yes, pleasee." Barty said the slow circling driving him crazy.

Evan finally lowered his head towards Barty's heat and took a long lick, moaning at how good his baby tasted. "Ohhh my godddd- Evan you-re whole- mouthhh-" He had to stop as Evan dove in like this was going to be his last meal. Barty made a weird noise when he felt Evans newly sharpened teeth graze his insides. "You like them?" Evan said coming up to hover over Barty as he stuck 2 fingers into his boyfriend, and started pumping them. Bartys hands attempted to go to his clit as he tried to gain some extra stimulation but Evan caught his wrist and pinned them against the bed with one hand.

Evan added a third finger. "I asked you a question slut. Do. You. Like. Them?" Each word punctuated with a hard thrust and curl of his fingers. 'Fuckkk, y-es, ohhhhh. I mmm love them." Evan smiled biting his top lip, show casing his teeth, the bottom half of his face still wet from eating Barty out. "Ev, I'm so close." "C'mon baby, let go." Evan felt Barty tightening around his fingers, a sign her was about to cum. Evan moved down to his neck and bit, not hard enough to break skin, but just hard enough to know he was going to leave a bruise. As soon as Barty felt the bite his vision exploded into white as his orgasm washed over him.

Falling of off a cliff, that how he felt, falling off a cliff into a sea of pleasure with beaches made of Evan. He never came so hard off of Evans fingers in his life, these teeth are doing something to him. As Barty came down he felt something thick and hard probing at his hole and the knowledge that his wrists were free again. He whimpered. "You can take it baby?" His boyfriend asked in a degrading but sincere voice. "Mhm, want you to feel good." "You sure?" "Yes. Use me, Evan." That did it.

Evan flipped Barty over like he weighed nothing, he loved being manhandled and his man knew that. Evan pressed roughly into Barty, thrusting hard and slow as Barty whimpered and moaned into the air. Evan couldn't settle on a rhythm, hard a fast, slow and sensual, slow and hard, just  rocking his hims slightly while essentially having Barty cock warm him. It was driving Barty Crazy. 

Barty could barley even make a sound from how overstimulated and high on sex he was. He barley registered as Evan trusted one last rough time,  and came deep inside of him, all he could feel was himself cumming again. He was still in a different dimension when Evan slipped out and cleaned the both of the up. "You with me B?" Only response he got was a hum from Barty and him snuggling into his side.

[steviewashere]

27,28,32 Eddie finds out he’s pregnant and tells Steve

Oooo, okay, I had so much fun with this one! And, get this, it's not almost three thousand words!

27: "I'm pregnant.", 28: "Marry me?", 32: "I think I'm in love with you and I'm terrified."

Tags: Established Relationship, Post-Canon, Trans Eddie Munson, FTM Eddie Munson, Pregnant Eddie Munson, Eddie Munson is a Sweetheart, Steve Harrington is a Sweetheart, Steve Harrington Loves Eddie Munson, Mild Hurt/Comfort, Marriage Proposal, Pregnancy Announcement

————— This is definitely not how Eddie thought he’d start his day.

He’s in the bathroom of his and Steve’s apartment, just sat with his head in his hands to accommodate the wave of nausea that overcame him. And that’s when he got the smart idea that…well, maybe he should figure out why he’s been so sick the last week or so. Steve’s still asleep in their bed. Came home late from work, wanted to sleep in on his day off, and already knew that Eddie was sick.

But didn’t know that it was because Eddie’s period was late. He had a sneaking suspicion that there was something wrong, when he didn’t have to put a pad in his underwear, but he thought it could be from PCOS or something unrelated. It’s not. Which is evident in the stupid plastic stick in his shaking hands, lightly glistening from his own urine, and definitely showing two prominent dark pink lines. He’s crying at eight in the morning, holding a stick in his hand, sick to his stomach, and shaking.

Whimpering, he knows that there’s no way he can avoid this. Steve is too observant for his own good. He’ll figure out something’s wrong or changed. And he’ll be too good, too sweet, and Eddie knows he’ll run. So he’s going to face this. Just like he did with the demobats. Facing this is half the battle. Finding out Steve’s reaction is the other half.

He exits the bathroom, stick in hand, but stops short in the open space of their room. At Steve on his belly, snoring smooth into his pillow, blanket pooled at his waist, nude skin golden with sunlight that peers through the window. God, he’s so beautiful; Eddie doesn’t know what to do with himself if Steve rejects all of this. Carefully, he gets back in bed quietly, not even jostling Steve’s body. He sets the test on his bedside table, hovers a hand over Steve’s back, and swallows down the soft sob that wants to override him.

Gently, he runs a languid stripe down Steve’s spine. “Baby,” he whispers, “Stevie, sweetheart? I need you to get up.” He takes a stuttering breath as Steve stirs, rolling over on his right side, blinking his eyes sleepily. Steve yawns, stretches, rubs fists over his eyes. A pout present on his features. Eddie feels awful for having to wake him up so early, but he thinks he’ll throw up if he has to keep this a secret any longer. “Okay,” he exhales. His breath shutters. “Okay, Steve, I need you to listen to me.”

At that, Steve blinks completely awake. Sits himself up against his pillow. Hands already grasping for Eddie’s. Face blank of anything teasing. Eyes going soft and concerned and imploring.

“Um—I—I think I’m in love with you—“

Steve chuckles. “Baby, I already knew that,” he lightly teases. But the small quirk he had to his lips dissipates almost as soon as it appeared, falling into the space between them.

Eddie nods anyway. “—And I’m terrified,” he admits. “I’m really fucking scared right now, but I know that I love you. I know that you love me, but I…” He tears one of his hands out of Steve’s grip, runs it harshly over his face, and curses softly, “Fuck.”

“Hey,” Steve murmurs, “You’re okay. Take your time, babe.”

“I’m pregnant,” he rushes out. “Steve, I’m…I’m pregnant. I don’t know how it happened. Must’ve missed my birth control a few times? Maybe I—I’m probably just fucking stupid and miscalculated when my period was supposed to happen. I’m sorry if this is—“

“Really?” Steve asks, breathless.

That’s when Eddie notices he wasn’t looking at Steve. Drags his eyes from their hands, the blanket that swamps him, and up to Steve’s…excited eyes? Shining and happy. He’s smiling, the small crinkles by his eyes are all too noticeable. Smile lines deep. All his teeth are showing. He releases a sigh of relief, nodding.

“Oh my God!” Steve exclaims, bouncing the bed with it. “Holy shit! That’s awesome, Eds. That’s so…Wait.” He pauses. Movement stilling. He’s half off the bed, angling for his bedside drawer, and reaching to Eddie, too. “Unless…Do you want this? I’m really excited for this, but I only want this if you want to.”

“I…” Eddie looks off to the side momentarily. He’s a bit afraid, honestly. Of what may happen with his body. What he may have to go through. The absolute uncomfortableness that he’ll have to endure, but…He’s thought about this before and been excited about it, too. Kids weren’t always ideal to him, not really. But having a kid with somebody he considers the love of his life, who’s looking at him like a puppy awaiting a bone toss, he’s content with whatever happens next. “Yeah, Stevie, I think I do,” he murmurs, “But only with you. With anybody else, I think I’d shrivel up and die.”

At that, Steve bounds off the mattress and disappears down their hallway, clambering about their living room. He rushes back in, careless of the neighbors below them, and skitters to a stop in front of Eddie. Slams his butt back down on the bed, hand gripping something, taking both of Eddie’s hands.

“You’re going to think I’m crazy,” Steve pants. “Like, seriously, insane.”

“Okay,” Eddie says slowly, “You’re scaring me a little, baby.”

He can see Steve swallow harshly. “Sorry,” he mutters sheepishly. “I just—This is crazy. I’m crazy. So, like we were close friends for a really long time before we got together,” he begins first. Gesturing with their conjoined hands between them. “And I knew that you were somebody I wanted in my life, no matter what we were. I knew that, like, day one? So, when we started dating, I had a feeling deep down that you were it for me.”

His eyes dart very briefly as if searching for words. He bites down on his bottom lip and works his breathing to be set normal. Eddie didn’t even realize he was still panting until he fully relaxes in how he sits.

“In our second week of dating, I got this insane idea. Went out to the mall with Robin, dragged her to the nearest jewelry store, and made them figure out the size of one of your rings. The ones you put on your ring fingers,” Steve explains softly. He grabs for whatever is in his left hand, fidgeting with it so that only he can see it, and then turns it around for Eddie to finally peer at. It’s a small, blue, velvet box. “We don’t have to do anything about this immediately. Whatever you want, I want. You’re one of my best friends. My romantic soulmate. And I love you beyond belief. So…Marry me?” He asks, enamored and giddy.

The box opens. Revealing the shiniest silver ring Eddie’s ever seen. It’s not that thick, a simple thing, doesn’t have anything added to it. But to know that it was made to his exact size, that’s something he carries warmly inside his chest.

He looks back up to Steve. “Yes!” He exclaims. “Are you…You’ve had this since week two? I can’t believe you right now, baby. Holy—“ And he takes the ring from the box, lets Steve slide it on his left ring finger, and just admires at it.

“I can’t believe that I get to be a dad, too, Eds. You’re the love of my life. This is…Fuck sleeping, lets celebrate!”

“Oh, how do you plan to do that? Because I could just sit here and fucking ogle this forever, Stevie.”

“I’ll show you how excited I am, how about that?” Steve teases. His eyes hood, cheeks flush pink, and Eddie knows he’s the happiest man alive right now. Well, other than the darling man in front of him. The pure giddy excitement on his face is something special.

[transwolfsmut]

CW cause I don't wanna trigger anyone's chest dysphoria

Do you know something that I love? Small tiddies on trans boys and enby folk. Soft, warm breasts I can cup in my hand. Don't get me wrong, medium and large chests are beautiful too; but there's something about small chests that fucking drive me crazy.

I'm fantasizing about giving a trans pup a nice haircut. He's sitting down on a chair, his upper chest naked. I'm standing behind him, using the machine to trim down that fluff. I'll give you a nice haircut that'll make you look manly. What do you like, puppy? A punk hawk so you look fierce? Perhaps something more "traditional" like short on the sides and longer on top so you can blend in the crowd like any other guy? I'll gently tilt your head with my hand and cut your hair. The buzzing of the machine is constant and hypnotic, you like how your skull vibrates when I press it into your head and hairs fall gently on your shoulders. You're all done, the shorter hair makes you feel light and fresh. Your torso is covered in small hairs. Look at you. It seems like you've been on T for a while and your body has become hairy and manly.

I'm still standing behind you. My hands slide down your armpits and I cup your chest softly, give those titties a strong squeeze and let go. "You're such a good boy" I whisper in your ear, giving it a quick lick. "Let me caress these beautiful pecs of yours. You know, enjoying the sensation will not make you any less of a man." I pinch your nipples, they get hard between my fingers. My hands massage your chest from armpit to the center and back again. You start to feel wet and hard from the stimulation. "Look at your fuzzy chest with all those hairs we trimmed, and these tits I love so much. You're like a little bear, round and hairy."

I remain at your back. You can only hear me breathing, you can't see anything from me except my arms and forearms as I reach beneath your pants and I start to masturbate you with one hand while the other runs from your hips to force you into the chair, to your chest so I can continue stimulating your nipples. You squirm with pleasure.

I place my hand firmly at the center of your chest as I strategically place my hand over your bits and allow you to rub into me as you please. Your hips jerk off the chair and back into it. It feels so good. Rub yourself on my hand, little pup. Cum for me.

You are finally done, panting. I let go of you and finally walk in front of you, offering a hand to pick you up from the chair.

Let's get you bathed before the hairs start itching on your skin, pretty dog. I get you into a warm shower and I wash your head and body with nice smelling shampoo and soap. You look so beautiful and shiny, a champ pupper. I'm not naked in the shower with you, I'm wearing a tank and my briefs, they are getting wet and as the clothing sticks to my body you can see the nipples on my flat chest getting hard, and you could also see evidence of my erection if you look close enough into the area where my tcock is. I like how vulnerable you look naked in the shower, how needy your eyes seem as they gaze though my partial nudity. I get down ony knees and suck you off while the warm water is still running down your shoulders, chest and belly. I feel your legs tremble as I suck your boy pussy. I'm firmly holding your hips, not allowing you to back away from my tongue. The warm water also drips into your cunt making the stimulation more intense.

I stop the water flow and wrap you on a towel. I know you're still needy but boy, we cannot waste water. I take off my wet clothes and you can finally look at the body of the older trans guy taking care of you. I'm not hairy, my belly is rounded and my legs are thicker than yours, some gray hairs are staring to show in my head and beard. You can now clearly see how hard I am as my tcock shows amongst my wet pubic fuzz. I know you want to feel it in your mouth.

I pat you dry with the towel and unexpectedly, I lift you off the ground and take you to the bedroom, I drop you on the bed to fuck you properly. I just want to get inside you and I know you need it so bad.

[the-writer-nerd-ro]

I can't believe I forgot to post this one since it's the start of my very special Sara Pena and Hunter Richardson mini-series "The H in Sara stands for Have A Nice Day."

This series is based on my very favorite Bon Jovi album 'cause I think Sara would like it too. Each fic will correspond to a song on the album (not in order), the song that has two versions on the album will be a multi-chap, so there will be twelve fics total :D

I want to be loved

Sometimes Sara was home when Hunter got home from work and sometimes she wasn't.

Today, Hunter wasn't sure which was the case until she got to the bedroom and found Sara flopped across the bed, tears leaking out of her eyes.

She was wearing headphones and hadn't noticed Hunter, so Hunter stalled in the doorway, watching and waiting.

Finally, Sara looked over, paused her music, and began to swipe at her face.

“Are you alright? Did something happen?” Hunter asked, tentatively moving forward.

“I'm okay. Just listening to my crying playlist.”

“Your what?”

“My crying playlist. Don't you have playlists that correspond to your current mood?”

“No, Sara, I don't.”

“Oh. You should make some. It's much cheaper than therapy.”

“What music is on your crying playlist?” Hunter asked.

“Oh well, this one was just Bon Jovi. Some of the other ones have other songs.”

“I didn't know that Bon Jovi was particularly sad,” Hunter said, coming in and sitting next to Sara.

“Oh they aren't. I guess this album just has a lot of sentimental value. But like. The bad kind.”

“So why were you listening to it?”

Sara pursed her lips, thinking it over. “Just needed to cry, I guess.”

Hunter felt like if she pressed further she'd be picking at scabs, and she didn't want to be the one to hinder Sara's healing. So she just sat in silence, her hand resting supportively on Sara's back.

After a few minutes of quiet, with the occasional sniffle, Sara spoke again.

“My dad showed me this album. He played all the Bon Jovi albums for me back in the day, but this one was my favorite.”

Hunter nodded. She didn't know much about Sara’s parents, except for the fact that they were no-contact.

“Music used to connect us,” Sara said, blinking back tears.

“What happened?” Hunter asked, despite her intention to not pry.

Sara fell backward on the bed, bringing Hunter with her.

“I stopped being someone he wanted to connect to.”

“Oh.”

“I think Have A Nice Day is the last album I listened to with my dad before I realized I was trans. He doesn't know that, of course. I didn't tell them for a long time. I was his son, his spitting image. Everything I did was a reflection of him.”

Hunter frowned. “That's a lot of pressure.”

“Mm-hm. I was good at it though. He taught me about music and how to drive and fix cars. And he told me dancing was for girls and would give me looks if I bobbed my head too much to Livin On A Prayer.”

Hunter rolled on her side to face Sara. “I'm sorry you had to deal with that.”

“The thing is, I liked learning how to drive and fix cars. And I still like the music he shared with me I just… I can't listen to it without remembering that when I came out, that connection was severed. He told me I ruined his life, and I know he meant it, too.”

Hunter scoffed. “Sounds like your parents need to get a life instead of micromanaging yours.”

Sara laughed a little bit. “Yeah. I know they were in the wrong for that. I wish knowing it was irrational would make it hurt less.”

Hunter was quiet for a while, rubbing circles on Sara's shoulder with her thumb.

Finally, “Can you dance to it?”

“What?”

“Have a Nice Day. Can you dance to it?"

“Oh! Yeah, I think so.”

“Will you show me?” Hunter requested.

“Will you dance with me?”

“Of course.”

Sara started the album from the beginning, turning the volume all the way up, and hopping off the bed, pulling Hunter up with her.

At first, the dancing was a little stiffer than Sara usually was, but with Hunter's encouragement she began to really get into it, head banging and hip thrusting through all thirteen tracks.

It was silly, and it didn't solve everything, but it helped knowing there was someone who loved all of her and who would help her make new memories with the little things that had made her into the woman she was now.

[lexifer-666]

It's the new year and I've got weird family stuff happening I need to rant about. Under the cut. CW/TW for: mentions of emotional and physical neglect, manipulation, general abuse, homophobia, transphobia, ableism. Basically a huuuge traumadump post because i gotta have some place to work shit out. There's a silver lining at the end if you're willing to read.

so like. I spent years… YEARS being the family scapegoat. Everything I did was wrong. Everything about who I was… Was wrong. I spent the majority of my life building up walls and armor, carefully constructing this Person I should be. Quiet, calm, invisible. Never allowing myself to exist, never letting anyone know who I was. I hid so many aspects of myself- My gender, my religion, even the music I listened to, the books I read… The shows I watched. Because each of these things were weaknesses my family used against me. To belittle and manipulate me. There was… So much abuse and neglect. I've finally kind of accepted myself for being disabled, but I spent the better part of 3 years trying to convince my family that I wasn't faking or being dramatic, that there was actually something seriously wrong. It's been… 5 years since I moved out. I spent a lot of that time healing, letting the people around me see me for who I was. I stopped masking as much, and let my neurodivergent qualities show. I was floored when I would tell someone about something I was interested in, and instead of mockery I was met with genuine interest. I came out as trans openly, changed my name, started T. All the while… I had little to no contact with my family. I only showed up for funerals and shit like that.

In the past… Year? Ish? My family have all done a complete 180. They no longer act like I'm some demonic, sinner child. They all actually took the whole trans thing pretty well.. Which was a stark contrast to the hours-long lecture I got whenever I came home from my dad's house wearing men's clothing on my 14th birthday. It… Weirds me the fuck out. They actually treat me like a part of the family, they're listening to me when I talk instead of just talking over me. (I spent the ages of 16-17 barely speaking to anyone because I had literally fucking given up.) It's… I went to christmas this year. Voluntarily. I drove there myself. No one yelled. No one beat the shit out of eachother. I didn't feel disrespected at all-- The only time it even got close was when my mom was worriedly asking me if I could carry my own plate, to which I told her "I do this every day, mom." (I was doing things one handed, forearm crutch and all.) But…. I don't know. I should be happy that they're taking an interest in who I am now. I should be ecstatic! I might actually be able to have a relationship with my family! And… I am, to an extent. I'm… Happy I actually have a relationship with them now. Rocky, fresh, like I just got adopted and I'm still testing the waters.

But… There's also resentment. I spent my whole childhood, and 5 years of college and couch hopping, not feeling like I belonged anywhere. Of hating myself. They come to me now? After I've healed from them? After I already grew and moved on, began to accept myself, made real, genuine connections with other people? They enter my life with real love and acceptance now? When I don't fucking need them? Where were they when I was homeless? Where were they when I felt like my life was worthless? When I felt like only 3 people in this entire world actually cared for me and loved me? There's also guilt. I built friendships where… I related to my friends on the basis of. Oh fuck, none of us have good relationships with our family, we're all kind of outcast and scapegoated. Now… That's changing for me. And… I feel guilty. Because my friends deserve to have a family too. I shouldn't be the only one who gets to have this. All I can do is not.. Talk about it too much. It would feel like rubbing salt in the wound, and I do not want to hurt them like that. Soooo. I'm sitting here. At 5am. It feels like I've been sucked into an alternate reality where my family is… Not a bunch of traumatized, cycle-repeating abusive religious zealots.

My mother has discord? And knows what pronouns are? She straight up said "I'm sorry, I'm not meaning to disrespect your pronouns, I'm still getting used to this." Like… Jesus christ man she's 61. 61, ex-mormon, now evangelical, lives in a small town of literally 200 people. My stepdad didn't even really talk to me, either. Normally he would have some smartass thing to say, something to get under my skin and make me snap at him. And I was prepared to, he can't hit me now that I'm an adult without going to jail…. But he didn't even try. In fact, when the tarp on my car tore, he went to the next town over and bought me two rolls of expensive ass tape to fix it. Didn't even ask me to pay him back. I… Don't really know what to make of all this. The tiny, jaded 14 year old Lex that still lives in my heart is screaming at me. He's pissed, he doesn't want me to trust them a bit. But…. I don't know. I'm tired of not having a family.

[ask-them-bois]

Robots Don't Do Gender

(a drabble to feel out my thoughts on Incoding's gender)

Tw: None

.

"Hey... Lucina?"

"Yes, Cody?" Lucina looked up from her journal, to see the goldblood leaning on her doorframe.

"Can I talk to you? About something... Kinda important?"

She put her pen down. "I'm not your morail, Cody."

"I know, but this isn't... um, it's not something I can go to my 'rails for. Or Bri, even."

Her interest piqued, Lucina turned around in her chair. "Come in, then."

A look of relief flashed across Incoding's face and he stepped inside, shutting the door and taking a seat on Lucina's bed.

"Thanks. So... um..." He fiddled with the buttons on his vest as he tried to find the courage to speak. Lucina simply waited, and eventually, Incoding took a breath. "You're... You're trans, right?"

Instantly guarded, Lucina set her jaw. "Yes. Did Erimus tell you that?"

"A long time ago, yeah. He mentioned it." Incoding nodded. He looked up, noticing her expression, "I, hey, look, I don't care. You're Lucina, okay? I'm not here to ask about any of that. Both of our kids fall under that portable sky shield, you're not going to get any shit from me."

"Then why did you bring it up?"

"Because I..." Incoding hesitated, twisting his metallic fingers together.

Lucina had been around too long not to put the puzzle together. Guilt swelled in her chest at how defensive she'd become with her friend, and she sighed. "Oh, Cody..."

"I... Yeah." The cyborg laughed uncomfortably, rubbing the back of his neck, "I just... I was talking to Corden about everything the other night, and... a lot of what he said made sense, and something clicked, and I just-"

"Stop." Lucina raised a hand. "You don't have to explain, I get it." Incoding watched her as she turned to her journal and shut it quietly. "... Tell me what you're feeling."

"I don't... know. I'm just... a guy, I guess? I'm not a man, I'm not a woman, I'm not genderless or somewhere in between. I'm just..." The goldblood shrugged, "I'm just Incoding. I'm a guy, a dude, a bro, but not... quite."

Lucina waited, but Incoding just stared at her, having explained it the best he could. Finally, she nodded. "I think you came to the right person. Hang on."

She stood up, and walked over to her bookshelf, where rows upon rows of full journals sat, moved there from her cavern in the desert.

She rifled through them, before pulling out an ancient looking book, bound in black leather. She opened it, checking the contents, before she tossed it at him.

Incoding caught it easily, and looked down at it. "What's this?"

"My journal from when I was a wriggler. I was about Corden's age when I figured myself out." She looked at the bookshelf, running her claws over the spines. "Every one of these catalogues my life, my thoughts, my memories... I had to put them all down, or else I'd forget them. That one in particular is from when I started thinking I was... different. Read it if you want, it might help. I can make a stop by the bookhive with Amadri later and get you some other materials to help, too."

Incoding looked from her, to the journal, and back again. "Thanks, Lucina. I'm not... Too old to be doing this, am I?"

Lucina scoffed. "Of course not. There's no age limit on this kind of stuff, Cody." She pulled out a journal, only to reshelf it a few books over. "Erimus likes to wear skirts. He figured that out when he was already a captain, well after I married him." She said suddenly.

Incoding raised an eyebrow. "I didn't know that."

"That's because he doesn't talk about it. But he's tried mine on. Fought in one of them, even, and ripped it. I never forgave him for that." She sighed wistfully, "It was a gorgeous one, too. Black and violet. Really showed off his calves." She shook her head. "My point is, it's all a mess. It's complicated and confusing and stupid, so it's up to you to figure out what it all means.

Alaric doesn't use any term. Your kid thinks they're a robot. So don't... don't feel like you have to rush anything, alright? Take your time. I can help you experiment with whatever you felt like trying, and it'll just stay between us if you want."

Finally, Incoding smiled. "Thanks, Lucina. You're an incredible woman."

"I'm taken." She said curtly, before they both laughed.

[theficplug]

|Next Lifetime|Erik Killmonger|

previous chapters : Part 1 Part 2  Part 3 

erik killmonger x black reader

|part 4|

warnings: um definitely smut this chapter at the end. so 18+ for this chapter! and a possible trigger warning for grief but i promise it gets better and its a romcom.

synopsis:  reader grieves Erik until she doesn’t (i’m trying not give too much away). This one is a long ass chapter. So, grab you a snack and something to drink! I hope y’all like it.

“You promised on our birthday that you would give me something far more special than the charms you would gift to me. In 2018, you wanted to avenge your birth parents and you went off and did something foolish and when you- when they returned you to me you were-.” you struggle for a bit to find the words to explain it all to him as he takes a step back to gather himself. 

He rubs his eyes before grabbing your arms gently and massaging them . He leans down to look you in your eyes before asking “Ma, did you take something before I came to pick you up? You alright? Cause what you saying don’t make no sense at all... Your pupils don't look dilated though.” 

“I know how this must sound. Batshit crazy. I know it sounds crazy to me too. I’m still trying to figure out if I’m losing my own damn mind. I don’t know how or why. I just know that you came back to me.” you say to him and he shakes his head. 

“Erik. You’re talking about your ex boyfriend...The one that passed... . Alright, I’m going to take you home now... I still don’t understand what’s going on here and I’ve had about all I can take of trying to understand what’s going on here.” N’Jadaka says quietly to you before going around and opening your car door. 

The drive was silent as you picked at your nails and let the soft r&b roll over the tension between the two of you. 

Your own thoughts were going in about a billion different directions again. It didn’t feel right to just sit on all of that and not say anything at all. As ripped from a science fiction film as it sounded at least he knows. 

He was never one to think quietly because you could practically read his thoughts with the changing of expressions across his face.

The relief of seeing your building washed over you as he offered to walk you to your door. 

It was bittersweet because there was still so much of him in this different version of him. Even when he was upset with you or livid with whatever ghost that was haunting him back then,  he still showed nothing but tenderness to you.

You nod and give him a small smile before following him up the stairs , to your elevator, and finally your door. 

“I know that this is a lot. I mean who in their right mind would be able to process all of that.I wish there was any other way to say it... But thank you, I had a really nice time.” your soft words snap him out of staring at your face as if he was trying to piece it all together.

He knew deep down that there was something about you and what happened that weekend while dreaming in colours and other worlds but he couldn’t wrap his head around all of this happening in real life.  

You lean up to kiss his cheek and he grabs your shoulders softly. “With all due respect. You seem like a lovely person and a good woman, but I just - this all a lil too weird for me and I don’t think it’s a good idea that we continue seeing each other.” 

He kisses your hand and leaves with one look over your shoulder as you call out “Meet me at our spot. If you are still anywhere in there. You’ll know what I mean.”

“What the hell happened ? I didn’t expect you back until tomorrow morning?” Iri says as she settles on the other side of the sofa and patted the spot next to her as you kick off the sandals and lay your head on her lap with tears already prickling your eyes. 

“Oh you didn’t? Please don’t tell me you told him about the soulmate reincarnation thing? Sweets, you probably scared the hell out of that man. We needed you to keep that waaay down in the vault.” Tiki adds as she pops the cork off the bottle of wine in her hand and pauses the movie playing on the screen in the background. 

“Here’s what we’re gonna do . You’re gonna text him and tell him that you had just gotten your wisdom teeth removed earlier today and the meds had you unexpectedly zooted as fuck. “ Iri suggests and you chuckle softly.

---

Meanwhile at N’Jadaka’s house he was already being pestered by Lina and Penn for some type of details about what happened during the date. Orleans was already in the kitchen cooking and ear hustling but went back to his conversation on the phone with Big Mike when he realized there wasn’t any tea. 

“I don’t feel good. I’m finna go lay down. I’ll talk to y’all in the morning”. He says simply to them before trudging his way to his part of the house.

They had been friends since college and just got used to the idea of living together as they did in the dorms so they made it work after graduation. 

It helped them save money for when they finally separated and all of their schedules kept them busy so they didn't have time to get sick of each other. They also knew him well enough to know when something was bothering him and to leave him alone when he gets this moody.

"What the fuck?" He whispered under his breath 

"What the fuck was all that?" He continues talking to himself as he strips and walks past the bathroom mirror to the shower. 

He stops when something catches his eye. He sees a birthmark on his chest that almost resembles the shape of claw marks. He lets his fingers linger over the mark for a second. Thoughts of a panther mask clouded his memories for a moment before he shook his head and entered the shower. 

---

A few hours later of talking through it with your girls about possibly seeing a therapist about all that's going on and you were ready for bed. 

It didn't take long to drift off, you were ready to put the whole thing behind you. 

The familiar setting of purples , pinks, and hues of blue came into focus and you looked around letting the butterflies land on you again.

 You walk through the flowers and find Erik sitting by a stream of water weaving some of the flowers together. 

"What the hell, E?" You ask as you run over to him and wrap your arms around his neck

He turns to you and smiles big , his dimples on full display before shrugging. 

"It ain't perfect but it's the best I could do. They said it's like a do-over or something like that. I get a second chance but as a result of the way I did things the first time it's a lil different. Like when you restore a computer and it lose all it's files and shit. I get a new life but I'm still kinda stuck. I kinda like it though. I don't remember all the other shit when I'm awake. It really is like starting over. Shits crazy to explain when you think about it. But for you , you already know. I'd find you in this life and the next and the one after that. I don’t think I’mma ever fully remember what happened with all of that when i’m awake. I’m cool with it. It ain’t something I’m tryna remember." He says tipping your chin up to look at you and kissing you softly 

"I know. At least I get to hold you in the real world. It's just different. But guess what I saw today? I seen that bench that you and me signed all them years back. It's still there." You say to him and he places the lil flower bracelet around your wrist as y'all sit and talk for the rest of the night.

By the time you wake up with the aroma of breakfast wavering throughout the loft you feel a little better about the whole situation with Erik, not Erik. 

You opened your phone and sent him an I'm sorry gif with a few extra words inspired by Tina's wisdom tooth lie. 

 After easing into the kitchen and standing in the doorway you see the two lovebirds dancing around the kitchen singing to each other and laying food on the plates. 

"Morning lil sleepy head. Don't forget that I'll still be coming down to the center with you today for the seminar. You hungry?" Iris asks as she places the plate in your hands with a kiss to the top of the head. 

"Of course. There's a young girl, Sophie there that I really think would love to talk to you. She's just starting her transition. And her parents are wonderful but they don't really have much money. She hasn't really had the chance to get more “feminine” presenting clothes and she likes makeup.  " You say and she nods catching your drift.

"Well it'd brighten anybody's day seeing a beautiful successful trans woman like myself honey. But let's lift her spirits even more. I'm gonna bring some of the makeup I got from pr packages and some of the clothes from this collection. I really hope it helps." She answers and Tika just saunters over to her proclaiming her love for her. 

"Alright alright alright. I get it. I'm single as hell." You say laughing softly

---

Two weeks ticked by with radio silence on N'Jadaka's end. After the 4th day when he gave you the cold shoulder at a coffee shop, you decided to stop trying.

Maybe it wasn't fate and maybe you were just believing what you wanted to believe. 

You reason with yourself as you walked around the loft making notes about the new housing project you were working on. 

Finally having the house to yourself with the lovebirds gone for the day on a little adventure. You got to work budgeting and calling different areas to rent out apartments to you for women and lgbtq+ with housing insecurities. 

Your ramblings and thoughts were interrupted by a knock at the door , thinking that Iri or Tika left something behind. 

"I told you to take your sunscre- Daka?" You question as he stands in front of you

You cross your arms and furrow your brows while waiting for an answer from him.

He stands for a moment like he’s trying to gather all of his thoughts together in a way that makes sense to both of you. 

"What're you doing here?" You ask putting your hand on your hip. 

He drops his shoulders and lets out a soft sigh before looking at you.

"I didn't wanna believe it. What you said that night cause like how the fuck does something like that happen? I’mma be honest.  I wanted to just believe that you were a lil off and leave it at that but something keeps telling me that you right. I can't remember shit before college and all I wanted to do was be with you. From the moment I met you in the store. I was like, this is it. This is what's missing. A piece to a puzzle that's all jumbled up." He admits and you nod slowly before letting him in. 

You walk around the kitchen getting a cup of tea for yourself and sitting a cup of coffee down on the counter for him.

“Don’t worry it’s black, I know you dont like it sweet.”

"You know I didn't exactly expect my fiancee that I buried months before to show up at a damn supermarket of all places. This isn't some movie or fanfiction. These kind of things don't happen in real life. Daka you, you had claw marks all over you. The last time I laid eyes on you. And now you're here in front of me. I thought that I was losing my mind." You say and he starts to unbutton his shirt.

"These." He says peeling his shirt off and showing you the birthmarks on his chest and shoulder.

You trace your fingers over it before leaning your head on his shoulder. 

"I asked my parents about my childhood and when I passed by my old neighborhood a few days ago andI remembered some things. I remember what happened to my other parents, in pieces. Shit’s brutal." He says dropping his gaze

"It's okay." You whisper to him and wrap your arms around him. You rocked him for a moment letting him let all of those feelings wash over him. 

He embraced you for a moment before kissing you tenderly. You tug at his bottom lip before deepening the kiss when he press you against the counter. 

"We'll figure it out... Something telling me I'd be a fuckin fool to lose you again." He says quietly against yours lips. 

"Are you gonna make love to me or are you going to keep looking at me like that?" You ask as he studies your whole face like he's looking at art. 

"A memory. It's you. We stood right here and I kissed you the same way. You were saying something like "you bring yourself home to me"." He says and you nod frantically, holding him closer to you.

"I did. It was right before you left." You admit and he nods before lifting you up onto the counter and kissing you heatedly this time. He kisses down to your breasts before looking up at permission from you to unhook your bra. 

Always a man that knows what he's doing. He takes kisses around your breasts and nipples. He takes his time to lick and caress you until he works his way down.

You shake your head yes before moving to slide off your panties but his kisses and his mouth is already beating you to it as he kisses down to your thigh.

He slides your panties off with his teeth and tosses them over his shoulder. 

You tilt your head back as you feel him wasting no time massaging over your clit and working you over with his fingers, curling them and stroking you gently. 

Your soft moans fill the room when he hooks your leg over his shoulder and begins to suckle your clit softly , swirling his tongue over it. 

"Tika will kil- Ooh god. How does your tongue feel like it's vibrating?" You ask and he only chuckles and grips onto your cheeks to bring you closer to him.

He was feasting on and devouring you like he was going to lose again and you could grind your hips down against his tongue and moan his name sweetly.

He didn't stop his tongue or fingers working in you until your legs are shaking and you're gripping at his head. 

"You have- fuck. I'm a squir-" you moan his name brokenly while trying to get out your words and lean back for a moment licking his lips before realizing what you're trying to say.

"Hold that for me. I wanna come with you." He says to you and you pout and protest as he removes his fingers. He picks you up off the counter and carries you bridal style asking you which room is yours.

"Left , left." You giggle into his shoulder as he helps you slide your dress off and you unbutton his jeans for him. 

You capture him in a kiss for a moment feeling his soft plump lips against yours again for the first time in what feels like forever. 

"It's been a long time since I've done all of this. . . Gentle." You say and he runs a calloused finger over your cheek moving a curl away from your face as he looks at you. 

He gets a quick flash of a memory of you and him in bed. You wore a smile on your face before telling him "happy anniversary".

He trailed his fingers down your body remembering almost every scar , every moment. 

When Erik got to a scar at your side. He chuckled, unlocking a memory of you two running from the neighborhood rottweiler , Smokey. 

That old ass dog hated you and he hoisted you over the fence first after being out late one night in high school. The gate had caught your side when you jumped. 

Erik felt so bad he brought you food from anywhere you wanted everyday from to school for a month. 

He leans down to place open mouthed kisses to it. 

He traced over your thighs to the cellulite and stretch marks remembering when you first got them. 

He was moving homes at the time and he wasn't ready to be further away from you yet.  You two just sat for hours at the park in the grass, talking. 

" You know white men behind all of that anyways. They want y'all to feel like you gotta look the same way. That's how they make them billions. My mama had 'em . Yo mama , and generations back. And it ain't ever stop them from being the women they are. Besides if any dirtneck nigga ever try you , just tell me. Imma handle it." He would say as you sat with your head on his lap, staring at the sun setting, knowing good and well your grandparents were gonna ground you for being late when you get home. 

They never did though cause you were with Erik they knew you were gonna be alright. 

"Nothing to worry about. I… I've never done any of that stuff before…Have you?" you question hesitantly as you stare off. 

"Tisha. From Ms. Wilkes class. We was coming from the kick back-" 

"Uh uh . That's your business , you ain't gotta tell me all of that." You say slightly upset at the fact that Tisha of all people was his first. 

----

"I got you." He says kissing your forehead then your nose before hooking your leg over his hip and easing into you slowly while his lips are still on yours. His eyes never left yours as he cupped your face sweetly like he didn't want to lose you again. 

In this moment he gets a glimpse of prom night and how things changed between the both of you forever. 

He wraps his hands around your waist. One of his hands splayed across your belly. 

He remembers the pregnancy scare you both had afterwards with him holding your hand and telling you no matter what happens he wanna be there for both of you.

Luckily, nothing came of it but you were definitely closer because of it.

You let out an open mouthed gasp at the feeling of being so full of him after so long. 

You rest your hands on his neck and shoulder and he bottoms out fully settling into you as he moves his arms next to  balance himself. 

You close your eyes as he begins to stroke into you trying to set a rhythm for you as his praises for you fall from his lips. 

He kisses his way down your neck licking the marks that are already starting to form there. 

"My lil baby." He mutters out after licking a freshly formed hickey forming on top of your breasts. 

You open your eyes slowly , looking at him and the way he's looking at you . 

"It's been way too long since I've heard that from you. You're remembering?" You ask quietly as you let out a soft moan.

N'Jadaka's muscles flex and tighten as he picks up his pace. His abs clenched as he  pulls out almost completely and filled you at a different angle.

 The sounds of your moans filling the room with every stride and stroke of his hips,  it seems like you're closer to floating in space. The man was fucking you like his life depended on it and at this point all you could do is wrap your arms around him again to comfort you as he shutters and rolls his hips deeper into you. Your walls tighten around him as you relish in the feeling of him. 

"Fuck. I remember all of it." He says half chuckling at the way it's coming to him and half nearly in tears cause he really missed being with you. 

"I also remember that this is your favourite position cause you like to see my face." He teases before leaning down to kiss you again with them plump ass lips.

"E?" You ask , grabbing his face with trembling hands.

"Baby?" You ask again 

He moves his hands from your waist and places your hands in his. Then moving them above your head as he flashes in between making love to you for the last time and now.

You roll over with him and place your hands on your chest riding him slowly getting the rhythm as he strokes into you from below. 

He laughs softly when he realizes what you're doing. 

"Are you spelling my fucking name , baby?" He asks and you tell him that you can spell both.

You let out a whimper when he brushes your spot and let him take over as he runs his hands over your thighs to your butt and over your back as he strokes into you. 

He plants his feet on the bed and work your hips in rhythm with him. 

It didn't take long for you to orgasm with a loud shriek of his name . You had forgotten how he gets when he's close as his hands on gripping all over your thighs and your back. You were already feeling sensitive with your second orgasm coming through and this man felt like he was trying to put it in your belly. 

He rolls you onto your side giving it to you deeply. 

With a loud hiss and panting from him he cums , holding you in his arms.

"I don't think it has felt like that since our birthday last year." He says into your ear as he pulls you closer into his arms. 

He engulfs you fully in his embrace and presses a kiss to the side of your head. 

You laugh softly and roll over to face him , resting your forehead against his.

"I remember. You took me to Paris. I had never been and at the time I was obsessed with everything Parisian. We fucked on the balcony and somehow I ended up popping the straps to my favorite dress. You still owe me by the way." You tease and he shakes his head laughing. 

"I think we ended up saving they marriage from across the way though. They was arguing the whole time. Then they gon watch us like we ain't see them." Erik says laughing as he squeezes your thigh playfully.

"I know they was trying some things." You joke 

"I missed you so much. You don't even understand." You admit with a somehow saddened and relieved expression. 

"I know.  I want to start over this time. All of that Erik Killmonger shit is over with. I wanna keep the name N'Jadaka and just start over. All of that was too heavy on me to carry. I wanna let it all go. I wanna do it right with you." He explains 

"Good because if you put me through that again. Wakanda will be the least of your damn worries." You say to him and he nods giving you his word, sealed with a kiss.

"It'll be alright. Everything happens for a reason. And I think that right now a bath needs to happen and I'm gonna need you to do that thing again that you did in the kitchen cause I'm tryna figure out when you learned that-" 

At some point after the bubble bath/ shower combo you were both out like a light until Iri and Tika decide to come busting in like they usually do with little gifts and food for you. 

"Guess who's your fave- SHE GOT A WHOLEASS MAN IN HER BED" Iri announces to Tika before your pillow hits the door as she closes it. 

"Sorry about that. This is kinda our cuddle hour so they're used to just coming on in." You say sleepily and he just laughs it off while holding you closer. 

"It's all good. I remember that I ain't know them much before but when we did spend time with them, they were good people." He says, still trying to piece it together.  

----

You fell asleep more peacefully than you had in a long time. Now granted, good sex didn't fix the many layers of issues and mysticism surrounding everything.

But for now, you knew that you had him, you had your girls, family and your business. Everything felt alright again. 

Right up until the point of sleeping through the first alarm to meet the property owners.

"Bae. Bae your phone going off." N'Jadaka whispers in the dark room , voice still riddled with sleep and grogginess. 

"Shit. Shit. I'm gonna be so late." You call out , quickly jumping out of bed and stumbling around the room. 

It takes you about 25 minutes to speed through getting dressed in your best skirt suit. 

N'Jadaka sits on the end of the bed putting on his shoes and watching you shuffle around. 

He had offered to drive you there and stay with you and check out the property with you. 

He slows you down by grabbing you by your arms gently and placing a kiss to your lips. 

"Good morning, handsome. Let's go" 

You walk through the living room with Iri and Tika already posted up in the kitchen placing two breakfast burritos in a container to grab and go. 

You grab your things from the counter all while thanking them and jetting towards the door.

"Good luck pooh!" Tika calls after you. 

"Byyyyeeee Dakaaaa" they call out after him

---

"Here it is . These are the apartments. I know they don't look like much now from the outside. But from the pictures it looks great. And they'll be safe and comfortable here-" you babble on to N'Jadaka while you both stand outside of the building where Erik grew up , until you notice two women walking to  a car that clearly wasn't from this area. 

You notice Shuri and your breath hitches in your throat. 

Frozen in your anxiety, the seconds ticked by and it was too late to leave. She looked you dead in the eye and then at N'Jadaka like she had seen a ghost.

She gasped and Nakia followed the eyes before back into the car. 

"SHURI WAIT - PLEASE" you yell out to them but the car was already speeding  away. 

tag list : @doublesidedscoobysnacks @chaneajoyyy @mirandkimy @doitforthevine67​ @amyhennessyhouse @dasia21​ @depressionandfandomsinc @sinfully-dope @ambitionwood @heybriheyyy @wholelotta-melanin @theesotericqueen​ @mbakuwife​ @spookys-girl @teardropzih @bigchoose @ceo-of-baby @sweetpeachjones @lost-ssoull  @shyblackgurl @justpeachee @nijajoha @imayhavemisunderstood @beautifullmelodyxx​ @alookintohersoul @rbhp @champagnesugamama​ @just-peachee @almeda-344  @mahogany2021 

[thiswasinevitableid]

Okay well then!!!! I am very glad and excited to share my most recent idea I had while rereading Yeti Hunting again!! And the new Incubus one too!! They're almost exactly the same idea, just different flavors I suppose. Also Joe is trans in both the ideas but that's less to do with the ideas themself and more to do with just me projecting on him sgfjgsjfhsjdh

Okay so it's like a reverse au so Stern is some kind of cryptid, but as far as Barclay knows they're just two good human friends (but maybe they wanna be a little more than friends...). And then one day Joseph goes into heat and tells Barclay he's sick to try to keep him away, but Barclay being the sweetest man alive goes to his house with fresh soup to take care of him and Joe seems really panicked about Bar being there and tries to make him leave but he is CLEARLY unwell and Barclay is very stubborn when it comes to helping people he cares about and so he plants himself down on the couch and says he's not leaving until Joe tells him what's wrong and Stern tries to hold onto his human form but it's taking too much focus and energy and whoops Barclay finds out his friend not human and currently in distress and so horny it hurts and if he can help his friend and fuck him at the same time, well then that's just a win all around (bonus points if at the end Barclay is kinda sad because he thinks Joe just needed somone to fuck him, not nessacarry Barclay, but Joe frantically assures him that he is SUPER into him and if it were anyone else he would have kicked them the hell out and probably skipped town bc he couldn't trust anyone else with a secret like this).

Or!! (This is where the incubus part comes in) Joe is an incubus and currently hiding out in his human disguise at the Amnesty lodge and it's going fine for a while, but then he starts talking to and getting to know the really hot chef. And they slowly start growing closer and closer. And maybe in this world, the power an Incubus gets from sex depends just as much on their desires as it does the human's. And this has never been an issue for Stern before, but now he's falling for Barclay and wants him and no one else so he's getting less and less energy from his encounters and Barclay is worried about him because he doesn't seem like himself anymore. Almost as if he's... dulled? When Barclay looks at him the blue of his eyes seem muted and his general aura seems... gray. And it all comes to ahead when Joe finally stops insisting he's fine and after dinner one night he asks if he can speak to Barclay privately, and he comes clean about everything and Barclay, while a little shocked, rolls with it very well and cups Joe's face in his hands and kisses him softly and it like,,, you should have come to me sooner, I'd do anything for you,,, and yeah it's really tender,,,,

Okay that's it I'm sorry it's so long and probably incoherent. I tried to use at least little formatting to make it better but it's a tumblr mobile ask, I'm not sure even the new paragraphs will translate over. The general idea is that they're close friends and Stern is Not Human and Barclay finds out under less than ideal circumstances :3 I know these are far from original or unique but I just wanted to share my ideas with you bc you're the inspiration for a good 70% of my private writings, but if you like them enough and ever feel like doing something with them that'd be cool ;3

Here you go! I went with scenario one. Content Note: some “mating” talk and mild subdrop at the end (which is, of course, taken care of)

The two canvas bags are ready to burst. Barclay peers into them, contemplating the addition of another box of tea, in case Joseph doesn’t like the other two. Mama was cagey when he asked, he doesn’t know what’s ailing the other man, only that he’s sick. 

Joseph manages Amnesty Lodge, where Barclays’ been a cook for the last six months. Barclay was initially wary of him; his cosmopolitan bearing and clean-cut appearance is so out of place in the rustic mountain town of Kepler that the logical explanation is he’s one of those city types who fell on hard times and got stuck here. 

It took less than forty-eight hours for him to prove Barclay wrong. Polite and polished, efficient and stunningly good in a crisis, Joseph handles the day to day chaos of the lodge while Mama, the owner, took care of the big picture stuff. His friendly greetings and consistent compliments about Barclays cooking gradually turned to afternoons spent at a table with his work so they could talk during lulls in business. 

When Joseph leaned against the counter, sleeves rolled up, laughing as he helped Barclay tidy the kitchen, the cook rushed headlong into his crush and never looked back. He regularly dreams of blue eyes and a movie-star face, finds his day doesn’t really start until Joseph pokes his head in to say good morning. 

He’s been without that greeting for two days now. Joseph never misses work, and his sudden absence worried Barclay enough that he checked with Mama to be sure the manager was okay.

“Joe’s fine big fella, just under the weather is all.”

The one time Barclay got sick, Joseph brought him tea and soup himself, checked in on him every hour, and--if Barclay’s fever addled brain is to be trusted--fluffed his pillows. It’s the least Barclay can do to drop off snacks and be sure his friend is okay. 

It’s a short drive to cabin Joseph calls home; he used to live at the Lodge, but as it got more crowded, he moved to his own space so those who needed a cheap, safe place to stay could have one. 

His knock on the door is answered by a brisk, “Who is it?”

“Barclay. I, uh, I brought you a get-well gift.”

Joseph opens the door to the cabin and to an entire new universe of fantasies. His normally slicked-back hair falls, relaxed, across his forehead, his loosely tied blue robe shows a tantalizing V of skin, and the dreamy-sleepy expression makes his face even more kissable. 

“Hi.” Joseph takes a step forward, taking the bags and bringing his face achingly close to Barclays’. Then he freezes, reversing into the house, “I, um, it was very sweet of you to bring all this. But you need to go.” He takes another step back, then doubles over with a groan. 

Barclay hurries across the threshold, setting the bags on the floor and steadying him over to the couch.

“Fuck, do you need me to get you like a heat pack, or a puke bucket?”

“No, no I just need to lay down, and for you to g-” he shudders, curling in on himself and tipping sideways. 

“Joseph, you’re really sick, I’m not gonna just leave you here. I mean, fuck, what if it’s your appendix or something?” He sits down next to the shaking man, rubbing his back comfortingly. 

“It’s not, I promise. Oh lord” he whines, looks at Barclay with frantic eyes, “I hope you can keep a secret.”

“Of course I can. Whatever I can do to help, I want to.” 

“Careful with those promises, big guy.” The nickname comes out in a growl as Joseph stands, undoing his wristwatch. 

“Oh FUCK!” Barclay scrambles back, almost falling over the arm of the couch.

There’s a monster where Joseph just was. Years ago Barclay saw a Maned Wolf in a zoo, and he’d swear that’s what he’s looking at now were it not for several glaring issues. First, it’s standing comfortably on two legs. It’s paws are more like hands, able to hold the watch and adjust the collar of its shirt. And he’s never seen a wolf, maned or otherwise, with spines down its back and a whip-like tail.

The creature runs a clawed hand through the fur at the top of it’s head, the way Joseph does when he’s nervous,  “So. I can’t tell you everything, at least not right now. What I can tell you is that this is the form I was born into, somewhere far away from earth.”

“Okay.” Barclays brain grinds like a broken ice machine as a familiar voice speaks to him from a fanged mouth. 

“I, um, I’m what humans call a Chupacabra. To answer the usual questions: no, I’ve never been to Puerto Rico. No, I don’t eat goats. And no, I’m not going to eat you.”

“Okay.” His heart is still racing, but not from fear, which is the most confusing was this could have gone.

Pointed ears flick, worried, “Are you in shock?”

“Kinda, yeah.” He nods as Joseph sits next to him with a heavy sigh. 

“I’m sorry. I didn’t want you to find out this way. I took the next few days off to avoid this exact scenario. I figured I wouldn’t see you, but forgot how thoughtful and caring you are.” Claws gently stroke Barclays hair, “my wonderful Barclay.”

He’s about to bring his hand up, cup those strange fingers to his cheek and whisper “always”, when Joseph pulls away. 

“I, I’m sorry. Again. I always get too handsy when I’m in heat. That’s the second worst side-effect, after the fact that being in my disguise is untenable when I’m in the thick of it. It’s like wearing a wet, wool sweater made of nausea.”

“....Hold on, you had to take time off work because you’re horny?” 

“Almost. Heat doesn’t come that often for me, which means whenever it happens, it’s intense. I have a hard time eating or sleeping, I can’t focus, and I spend most of the week masturbating. Which is not as fun as it sounds; I’m not even at the height of the damn thing and last night I humped a pillow on the kitchen floor while dinner reheated.”

Barclay groans, tries to hide it when the ears swivel his way, “Uh, guess I’m glad I brought you lots of food so you remember to eat. Shoulda, uh, put some lube or something in there as well, huh?” 

Joseph chuckles, “My nose tells me you put molasses cookies in there, so I’ll let it slide.”

“There anything else I can do to help?”

“Well…” he shakes his head, “never mind, I can’t ask you to do that.”

“Do what?”

“My heat is more manageable when I have a partner. Fucking someone relieves things more effectively than masturbation does. But I can’t-”

“I can help with that.” The offer is out before his brain catches up with his mouth. 

“Barclay, my kind have a very, um, involved mode of, um, well, I guess you foreplay. As, as much as I’d love for you to be my mate” he winces, “see, that’s what I mean. I say things like that, most of them not even possible given the fact you and I can’t reproduce.” 

“Uh, does it help if I say hearing you call me that is really hot?”

Blue eyes widen, and a tail traces up Barclays leg, “Only if you mean it.”

“I do.”

A narrow, long tongue flicks into the air, “In that case, big guy, how about we have a little planning session over dinner?”

-------------------------------------------------

Barclay parks in the driveway, next to Josephs’ sedan. He heads past the house and down a short slope to a creek, the twilight sky casting the forest in eerie grey-blue. There’s a tire swing leftover from a previous resident, and he idly pushes it back and forth as he waits for the game to start. 

“It’s like hide and seek” Joseph wipes his mouth, cleans cookie crumbs from the table, “We start outside, move inside, and you go as long as you can without me catching you. After all, I want a mate who can hold his own.”

He stuffs his hands in his jacket pocket to warm them. A yip bounces out from the trees behind him. When he turns, he quickly spots glinting eyes and bared fangs hidden in the undergrowth. 

Sprinting towards the cabin, he realizes Joseph laid a trap for him from the start; by asking him to begin at the creek, he’s forcing him to run uphill to safety, slowing him down. He lets his lizard-brain, concerned only with the fact that something dangerous is chasing him, take over and drive his legs as fast as they’ll go. The back door is locked, he double-checked that on the way down, so he doesn’t waste his time trying it, races to the front of the cabin and slams the door shut just as something huge rounds the corner after him. 

The nob jiggles, his pursuer testing the lock and discovering the thrown deadbolt. Barclay uses those few seconds to secure the windows on the first floor, throws his jacket down into the cellar as a failsafe, and bolts up to the bedroom. His hammering heart insists that locking that door is not enough, so he crawls into the closet and shuts himself up among the meticulously organized shirts and slacks. It’s not enough space for him to stand, so he tucks his knees to his chest and waits. 

“What happens if I, like, completely outsmart you.”

A toothy smile, “I wouldn’t worry about that if I were you.”

Each of the downstairs windows rattle in turn. Then the scratching starts, claws on wood coming closer with each breath. Joseph is climbing the wall up to the bedroom window that Barclay knows for a motherfucking fact he did not secure. 

A shuff as the window slides open, the cryptid landing with remarkable stealth on the bedroom floor. Barclay tracks him by the light coming under the closet door, his mouth covered so his breathing won’t give him away. The shadow pauses, sniffs, and then the bedroom door opens and shuts. Barclay’s not moving until he hears the front door do the same. 

Just as his legs start to protest being smushed up against his chest, the door reopens. Snuffling signals Joseph closing in, and an instant later the only light coming in is from the far ends of the door. Slowly, his last line of defense rolls to the right, revealing the creature crouching on the other side.

“Not a bad effort, big guy. You actually confused me for a minute with the scent trail of your coat downstairs.” Joseph reaches for him and Barclay, remembering that he’s not supposed to give up until he’s pinned, leans away. 

“That’s how my mate wants to play?”

“J-just following your instructions, babe.”

An intrigued purr, “I guess you are. All the more reason you’re the perfect partner for me.”

The words Barclays dreamed of hearing for months distract from the claws closing around his ankles. He lets out an undignified yelp when Joseph pulls his legs straight out and drags him out of the closet. Once he’s free of the forest of clothing, the cryptid picks him up and drops him on the bed. He moans and Joseph snickers, joining him on the bedspread. 

“Fuck, Joseph, no one’s ever been able to do that before and it’s so, so fucking hot.” He arches his back and shifts his limbs to help Joseph undress him.

“It’s because you’re the perfect size; big and strong, large enough to give me a decent cuddle when I’m human, but still small enough to be an easily subdued mate.” He gets the humans’ jeans and boxers off, hesitates, and then tosses them on the floor with a pained expression, “I’ll fold those later.”

“Gonna hold you to that. Also, wanna point out that it wasn’t that easy to subdue me.”

Joseph nuzzles his cheek, claws caressing his thighs, “Barclay, I was jogging while you were sprinting.”

“You coulda caught me right awaAAy ohwhatthefuck.” Tingling heat glides down his throat as Joseph licks a stripe along the skin, “fuck, it, it feels like the time I tried hot wax.”

The cryptid sits up slightly to look at him, “Is that a...good thing?”

“Fuck yeah. I really fucking liked it but it was fucking murder with the chest hair.”

Joseph runs his claws through the hair in question, “I like it.”

“I know, I saw you eyeing me that one time I used the springs at the lodge.”

“You can’t prove anything.” Joseph leans back down, curling his tongue around Barclays left nipple. The sensation makes him buck his hips, which Joseph correctly takes as a signal for more. He moves to the other side, takes his time teasing it and licking down the sensitive center of Barclays chest. Noses his stomach, nips his sides, and slides the alien heat of his tongue into the crease of his thighs. 

“Y’know I, ohfuck, I assumed from all that talk yesterday you’d get right to fucking me.”

Joseph kisses the inside of one thigh, “I, um, I thought about it, almost ripped your jeans to shreds and took you on the floor. But I wanted to be sure you were turned on. You’re not just a warm body, Barclay. You’re my mate. That means your pleasure matters as much as mine.” He licks up Barclays’ cock, hardened from rubbing against the soft fur of his belly, and sighs, “and what a mate.”

“Fuck” he squeezes his eyes closed because if we watches that mouth saying everything he wants to hear in between sucking his dick, he’ll cum in ten seconds flat. 

A final lick to the tip and then Joseph hops off the bed, “Did you prep the way I told you?”

“Uhhuh.” 

“Good.” Joseph returns, sets several items he can’t see by his feet, “that’ll make things easier. First things first” he produces a cock cage, sliding it into place, “these are a few things I smuggled over from my original home. This is enchanted, so it can go on an erect cock but still prevent the wearer from cumming until it’s removed.”

“That’s just cruel, babe.” He sits up on his elbows to kiss Josephs snout, earning him a pleased yip. 

“If you cum too fast, I won’t be able to properly breed you.” He winces again, “sorry, I sound like one of Indrids romance novels.”

“Again, gorgeous, I find it really fucking hot.”

The spines on Joseph’s back ripple, “You think I’m gorgeous? Like this?”

“I do. Also kinda scary, but in a hot way.” Now it’s his turn to cringe, “see? I sound like cheap porn written by an eighth grader when I’m horny. The way you sound is fine.”

Joseph lovebites his ear, then retrieves the other two items from the end of the bed. 

“And how does this look, big guy?”

“Like it’s either going to kill me or make me cum like a dozen times.” He furrows his brow at the strap-on. It’s narrower than the average human dick, with a pointed, slightly up-curved tip. What’s worrying him are the spikes. 

The entire shaft is coated in short protrusions. They don’t end in points, thank god, but if they’re at all stiff this is going to be miserable. 

“Here” Joseph waves him over, “touch it.” He guides his fingers along one side and the spines bend fluidly under his touch, and now all he wants to know is how they feel inside him. Joseph also moans, bucking his hips so the toy slides along Barclays palm.

“It’s, ohlord, also enchanted so that the wearer feels it as an extension of their body and can cum with it. Also, please decide in the next thirty seconds whether you want to be on your back or your stomach.” Amber pre-cum drips down Barclay’s fingers. 

“Stomach is better for meWHOAH, ohfuck, okay we’re doing this.” Now flipped on his belly, he raises his ass. The cryptid kneads it appreciatively before holding it open and sliding his cock in with once, graceful thrust. 

He bottoms out with a groan, which is more articulate than Barclay is managing to be as the spines rub and glide inside him, finding every patch of nerves, every angle to drag against in just the right way. Joseph hauls him onto his knees and then he’s off, growls and yips filling the as he fucks him. Barclay only just registers the bed banging into the wall so forcefully the headboard is cracking when claws sink into his hips and Joseph pulls him all the way onto his cock and pulses into him. 

“Holy fuck that was fast.”

“I, I didn’t jack off once today. Didn’t want to waste it, wanted to save it all for my perfect mate.” He’s thrusting again, not as hard but twice as fast, “shit, you feel so good, big guy, please tell me Mama okayed your time off for tomorrow.”

“Wh-why are we talkingAHnnn, about this now?”

Hot breath tickles his ear, “Because now that I know what’s like to cum in you, I don’t plan on cumming anywhere else for the next day and a half.”

“Ohfuckme” Barclay groans happily into the pillows as Joseph empties into him, cries out when his tail whips across his calf.

“Shit, did that hurt?”

“No, no it felt good, fucking-A babe every fucking part of you is amazing.”

The cryptid whines, pleased, and wiggles his hips, giving Barclay an idea. 

“That’s, uh, that’s why I want you for my mate, because you’re so fucking goo-mmph” his face presses harder into the pillows as Joseph pins his shoulders down and fucks into him, snarling “yes” over and over again. When he finishes this time he hunches over, nipping Barclay’ shoulders and neck. 

“You catch on quick, big guy.”

“Thanks, babe. Uh, are we gonna switch it up at any point or am I staying like this until tomorrow night?”

“No, we can fuck however we want. After” a fuzzy hand rubs circles on Barclay’s abdomen, “I’ve cum in you enough times that I can feel it from out here.”

Barclay moans, tightening around him as his hips snap once more, already imagining being full and fucked out. Maybe it’ll take all night. He’ll be limp if it does, but right now nothing sounds better than melting into the bed while Joseph fucks his ass like it belongs to him. 

After forty-five minutes, his cock is aching, his mind holds only thoughts of how good it feels to do as Joseph tells him, and he’s been cum in so many times that wet, obscene sounds accompany the cryptids thrusts. Said sounds pale in comparison to Josephs’ voice, which is spinning increasingly impossible scenarios the longer they’re in bed. 

“I hope they take after you.” Joseph murmurs. 

Barclay just manages to turn his head, “Who?”

A muzzle playfully nudges his cheek, “Our kids.”

His heart seizes and shakes at the words; they both know that’s not what will happen. Joseph warned him he might say things like this, said he could tell him to knock it off if need be. 

“Maybe they’ll, ahnn, they’ll have big, beautiful brown eyes and bigger hearts, just like you.”

He doesn’t want him to stop. Every thrust hits deeper, every point where their skin meets buzzes brighter when he talks like this.

“H-hope at least one looks like you, blue eyes.”

A guttural whine, tingling heat as Joseph laps tenderly at the back of his neck, “We’ll just have to see, usually we’re born in threes so, soOH, oh I’m close, shitshit” 

“That’s it babe, fill me up, c’mon, c’mon I want it so bad, Joseph, baby, please.” 

There’s a howltrill as cum spurts into him, Joseph panting as he smooths his hand around Barclays side.

“There, that’s done it.”

Barclay whimpers as he pulls out, his mind and body pulled tight, certain that if he doesn’t cum soon he’ll propose marriage instead and that’ll be a fucking disaster. 

Joseph carefully rolls him over and unlocks the cage, “Do you want to cum?”

“More than anything. Oh!” he’s unprepared for Joseph to sink down on his cock, “oh fuck, yeah, wanna cum so bad babe please, I’ll be so good, be such a good mate if you just let me cum in y-fuuuck” A trio of sensations levels him as he climaxes; his vision whites out, his hips jerk more violently than they ever have before, and a line of cum drips down his leg. 

Somewhere far away, Joseph says, “I think we’ve earned a break.”

He nods, body limp as the cryptid climbs off him. Then he’s falling, spinning helplessly down in a pit of realizations. 

Joseph didn’t mean any of those things he said. His friend needed a mate and Barclay, lovesick fool he is, was eager for a chance to play pretend that he didn’t think about what would happen when the game ended. Even if Joseph keeps him here through tomorrow, the next time they meet at the Lodge he’ll act like nothing happened. 

Fuck, Barclay didn’t even get to kiss him during all this, and now he’ll never get the chance, never, nevernever-

“Shit, I should have put a towel or a spare blanket down. Now I’ll have to strip the bed before I can--Barclay? Oh, oh baby, what’s wrong?” A hand pets his face and he turns away from it, refusing to open his eyes. Joseph takes his hand instead, “it’s okay, I’m here, whatever you need I’ll-”

“Don’t. Don’t say that. You can’t give me what I need, it isn’t your fault I, I know I’m not really your partner and I, I…” he sniffles, wipes his palm under his eye. 

“Barclay, look at me please.”

Reluctantly, he opens his eyes just in time to see Joseph dip down and kiss him. It’s awkward, their mouths not made to fit together, but he savors it all the same because it’s Joseph, his Joseph, kissing him like he hoped he would. 

“My heat can make me say some ridiculous things. What it can’t do is make me feel affection where none exists. In fact, the reason I wasn’t able to keep my disguise on yesterday is because being near you meant being near the mate I wanted most in the world. I, um, suspected you might share my feelings, but I didn’t want our first interaction as boyfriend to be me asking if you wanted to spend a day or so with me while I was in a sex haze. But then you offered to help, and I wanted it so badly that I barreled ahead without making sure you understood that this was me declaring my feelings. I’m sorry.”

Barclay climbs into his lap, not caring about the mess he makes in the process. The cryptid laughs, hugs him close.

“I, I shoulda said something sooner too. Not that I regret how we spent our first date.” He kisses Josephs chin.

“Me neither, though I don’t think it quite counts.” He rubs their foreheads together, “can your boyfriend take you out to dinner on Friday?”

Barclay grins, looks into loving, blue eyes, “Yeah, he can.”

[domesticsns]

I'm so curious about what happened at the restaurant between Sasuke and his father.

aAh, yeah that happened after Naori was missing and after Naruto and Sasuke had a very big fight about Fugaku revealing the one who blew the whistle on the military boarding school ran by Danzo was Sasuke and he didn’t know this. 

So Fugaku wanted to patch things up and apologize for the night and he contacted Naruto because he could not get in touch with Sasuke. Naruto talked to Sasuke and convinced him to go. Of course, Naruto is this guy who gives out chances like cheap candy. But he convinced Sasuke and said Fugaku was trying to chance and wasn’t this some sort of improvement that he reached out now than never. 

Sasuke giving it the benefit of the doubt. Decided to tag along and when they reached the restaurant that was actually pretty nice place and not some warn out bar as he had expected his father to choose. This was odd to Sasuke, but his questions were quickly answered when he saw a young women, not older than forty years old next to his father. She had this blond long curly hair and brown eyes and quite big bosoms.They headed to their table and Naruto eagerly introduced himself. He, as Naruto is. Gave Fugaku a hug and the women was like  “Oh I am a hugger too!” and proceeded to hug Naruto and she introduced herself. When she headed to Sasuke. Sasuke couldn’t get away from her faster. It was only that Naruto was standing behind him that he was forced to be a recipient of a hug he never wanted to be in anyway. He didn’t give his father a hand, he just give him an acknowledgement of a nod before they sat down. 

The women started talking. She said how Fugaku, her boyfriend, had told her all about them. Sasuke looks over at his father and then back at the women and interrupts her talking by asking her how old she is  and she chuckles and says a lady never reveals her age. Naruto laughed but Sasuke stared at her intensified. 

She then coughed and said she was 39 and Sasuke looks back at his father and says, “She is as old as your child.” 

“Come on Sasuke...They’re adults, stop.” Naruto said, putting his hand over Sasuke’s and squeezing it which might appear supportive from the outside, but this was Naruto’s  “YOU’RE BEING RUDE, BASTARD!” Squeeze. 

“Right...Sorry.” Sasuke threw back his glass of wine before grabbing a waiter and says: “I need something stronger...Bring me scotch and whenever see my glass empty you fill. Okay?” He grabs a fifty note and puts it in the waiter’s pocket.

So Naruto is talking to Fugaku’s girlfriend. Naruto talks about his job with children and she talks about her job as a hairdresser and Fugaku chipped in he conversation a little and Sasuke wasn’t talking...Didn’t want to talk either. But the woman was kindly trying to talk to Sasuke too. She starts talking about his job but Sasuke was being very short with her. Then she tried to compliment him by telling him he was very good looking. 

“Thank you. I take after my mother who shot through the head because she was struggling with mental illness and my father dismissed it as her being an attention seeking whore.” He looked at his father who snapped he had never spoken so ill of his late wife.  Sasuke said he might as well have because she was dead either way. 

“I am sure things were...Different back then,” the women said and she wrapped her arms around Fugaku’s and said, “he has been nothing but supportive with my son. He was going such a rough path with his biological father. I thought he would be broken forever, but then Fugaku came in our lives and we couldn’t be happier.” 

“Oh you have son....” Sasuke looked at his dad. 

“Tell us more about him,” Naruto tired to stir the conversation a little to something more positive. 

“Well he is 13 and not even that long ago he was a she.” She said proudly. “When he came out to us about how he felt. I knew he was always my son and supported him. But my former husband did not and we got in a lot of arguments and we seperated. This had very emotional toll on Oliver. He blamed himself. He was really depressed, but with a lot of love and support from Fugaku and me and therapy he is doing a lot better. I am so proud of my little boy. He really looks up to Fugaku now, he wants to join the police force and follow in his footsteps. Fugaku is teaching him all these manly things.” She laughed at her own words and when she turned to look at Sasuke he could see such hatred in his eyes it was almost scary. 

“Oliver is trans...” Sasuke said, “You are fine with this, but when you figured out I was in love with Naruto. You packed my bags and send me away!” Sasuke raised his voice. 

“Sasuke no-” Naruto tried to calm him down, but even he knew by Sasuke’s look hew as too far gone. 

“No, you shut up!” Sasuke shouted. 

“You send me away! You abandoned me! My mother shot herself through the head you wouldn’t look me in the eye. When I was unable to talk for three years you locked me in a closet and forced me to piss myself in order to get me to talk while every specialist told you it was mental. And when I found shred of happiness in my live in the form of this dumbass!” He pointed at Naruto, “You send me to an all boys military boarding school in otogakure ran by a guy you barely knew and just left me at his mercy and didn’t even try to find out what was happening behind those locked doors! You cut me off without a second thought and put me through hell where I had to do unthinkable shit to survive!” 

“I was a different person back then,” Fugaku said, “I didn’t know better-” 

“And now you’re suddenly a saint!?” Sasuke shouted. Everybody in the restaurant was staring. “People don’t fucking change!” Sasuke stood up. “I thought when you reached out to me. I was sceptical and I was right to be sceptical! You’re the biggest asshole in this fucking world!” 

“Sasuke if this is about Danzo. I thought it was just a strict school I had no idea what was really going on behind those gates until they were exposed-” 

“YOU’RE CHIEF OF POLICE! IT WAS YOUR FUCKING JOB TO KNOW! YOU SHOULD HAVE KNOWN!” Sasuke screamed.  “YOU KNOW THE SHIT I HAD TO GO THROUGH! THE FUCKED UP THINGS I THOUGHT WOULD EARN YOUR RESPECT ONE DAY JUST FOR YOU TO NOT EVEN SHOW UP WHEN I GRADUATE. TO NEVER EVEN ONCE CONSIDER SIGNING THE PERMISSION SLIP TO GET ME OUT OF THERE, NOT EVEN DURING THE HOLIDAYS!” 

Sasuke broke the fucking table with one kick screaming. 

“Sasuke!” Naruto shouted his husband’s name, this probably prevented him from not twisting Fugaku’s neck on the spot. 

“I could kill you in a heartbeat,” Sasuke grabbed Fugaku by his collar,  “-but the only reason you’re breathing right now is because I love that little gay shit-” he pointed at Naruto, “And he opposed to murder.” He pushed Fugaku away from him before leaving. 

“I am so sorry....” Naruto said getting up looking awkwardly around him seeing all the people looking at him and they looked scared. Some people grabbed their phones and were filming the whole thing. 

“Uhm...” He grabbed his credit card and handed it to the waiter, “Just charge everything on here...I’ll come back for it. Sorry again...Don’t file charges...”  He said as he jogged out of the restaurant and into the rain. Trying to find his husband outside. He finally caught up to Sasuke and had to jog to keep up with him storming rage pace.

“You want to tell me what that is about!? Sasuke! Sasuke, talk to me! You can’t ignore me!” Naruto said, walking behind Sasuke. His husband wasn’t responding. 

“I know what he did to you was wrong, but the whole reconnecting to him was to give him a second chance. He obviously is a changed men he is treating  this woman so kindly and is accepting of her son. When we first met him he didn’t even know there were more two genders and now he is supporting a trans kid because he educated himself on the matter. He is trying, he has regrets. I don’t understand what more you want from him?!” 

“I don’t care what the fuck he does with that kid or that woman. I want nothing to do with him.” 

“Sasuke, you were open about giving him a chance. Why is this not a positive thing to you. Is this not the solid proof that he changed and is more open minded. Why are you angry?” 

“BECAUSE IF HE WAS GOING TO BE THIS CHANGED MAN, WHY COULDN’T HE BE LIKE THAT WHEN I WAS GROWING UP!” Sasuke shouted, turning around. Naruto saw big tears rolling over his cheeks and his heart stopped beating for a second. He had to look twice, so he wasn’t deceived if it wasn’t just the rain rolling off his cheeks. 

“You don’t understand I am his son and he just left me...He broke me...” Sasuke whispered, his voice cracking as he spoke. 

Naruto wrapped his arms around Sasuke and hugged him tightly, placing a kiss on his hair as he could hear his husband sobbing. 

“It is not fair what happened to you, Sasuke. I’m sorry. I should not have pushed you into giving your father a second chance.” 

‘Yeah...” He heard Sasuke mutter as he had his face buried in Naruto’s neck. His grip around his husband tightening. They were pretty soaked in the rain as they stood there for a while till Sasuke calmed down and pulled away, rubbing his eyes. Naruto gave him a soft kiss on his lips. 

“I should go back...I broke a table, I need to pay for that.”

“Yeah I gave the waiter my credit card. I can pick it up tomorrow.” Naruto let his hand go through Sasuke’s hair, pushing his bangs back and holding his face in his hand giving him another kiss on his lips. They went to Naruto’s favourite ramen shop and they were soaked as they entered and sat down on the bar stools. Naruto gave Sasuke his jacket because he was wearing a white shirt and leave much for the imagination. Naruto was sticking up the chopstick in his mouth making it look like a walrus teeth and Sasuke chuckled before they ate a hot bowl of ramen as Naruto told Sasuke a funny story that happened at school, making him laugh. 

They ended up going home, throwing their clothes in the hamper before taking a warm bath together. 

[9h05t-f4c3]

Coming Out | Reki Kyan x Langa Hasegawa

Info/warnings:

trans! Reki, slight dysphoria, panic attack

my anime/manga masterlist

———

Reki sat on the cement ground of the skate park, the chilly midnight air causing the ground to freeze against the red haired teens clothed legs. Tears threatened to fall from amber eyes; Reki had come out here so he could cry away his feelings in peace, knowing the small park would be empty this late at night.

As soon as he leaned against the back wall of a small ramp, the tears began to fall; sobs threatening to escape the boys lips. But he couldn't let them. No, he couldn't show any emotion or he'd be perceived as weak; feminine. The misogynistic, toxic ideals of society had taught him that.

Reki rushed to put a hand over his mouth, his other hand wrapping around his slightly chubby waist as he curled in on himself; on his body- his wretched, female body that went against his male aligned mind.

Reki choked on a sob, his eyes squeezing shut as he attempted to stop the salty, stinging tears that wished to fall down his round, chubby cheeks. However, his attempts failed, his tears escaping; a sob making its way out of his throat and past his thin lips- the sound echoed into the night and the teen flinched.

Then, Reki heard something else; the sound of a skateboard rolling against the ground as feet pushed it, coming closer and closer and closer- until it stopped.

A familiar blue skateboard pulled up next to Reki's yellow-orange one.

Langa. Reki knew that skateboard; hell, he was the one who made it- of course he recognized it! And those familiar blue shoes that appeared next to him, the ones that belonged to his best friend and crush- Langa Hasegawa.

Reki only cried harder when Langa sat down next to him, having moved the two skateboards infront of the teens.

Had it always been this hard to breathe? Reki wasn't sure. All he knew was that he couldn't get any air into his lungs- that he couldn't breathe. A choke sob sounded around the two boys.

"Reki?" Langa's gentle voice echoed in the skate park; Reki didn't respond, still struggling to catch his breath. "Reki, is it okay if I touch you?"

Touch..? Reki's eyes widened and he shook his head; he could barely handle Langa touching him as it was thanks to his feelings towards the boy, so if the bluenet tried to touch him now? No. Please.

"Reki..." Langa frowned at the others frightened look, though respected his wishes, not moving any closer. "Can you focus on my breathing?"

Reki listened to Langa's voice, just barely taking in the ladders words as he continued to hyperventilate. A small, almost unnoticeable nod.

Langa began to slowly breath in and out, making sure to take deep breaths for Reki to follow. He inhaled for four seconds, held his breath for seven, and exhaled for another eight; the blue haired teen did this a few times.

After a few minutes, Reki had been able to follow along and he finally managed to stabilize his breathing.

Once the red head could breath again, he removed the hand that still lay wrapped around his waist and shyly moved it towards the blue haired boy, hoping that he would get the hint; Langa did, gently grabbing Reki's tanned hand into his own pale one.

"Are you okay?" The boy in question gently shook his head in response before moving closer to the other, their hands now resting atop Langa's clothed knee. Langa rubbed small circles into Reki's slightly shaking hand with his thumb; Reki laid his head on the others shoulder.

The two teens sat in a peaceful silence.

"Reki...?" Langa's voice broke the silent air after a few minutes. "Are you okay?"

Reki hesitantly shook his head.

"Can I do anything to help?"

A small smile made its way onto Reki's lips. "You already have." He skipped a beat before continuing. "Just please, promise you won't think any differently of me?"

Langa nodded. "I won't."

Reki sighed, squeezing the others hand. "I... I'm trans." Langa squeezed his hand back. "I wasn't born.. I wasn't born a boy..."

"I'm sorry.”

"It's okay, Reki." The mentioned looked hopefully into Langa's eyes. "You aren't mad? You don't hate me? You aren't gonna leave me?"

"No, I'm not mad, nor do I hate you. I'd never dream of leaving you, Reki."

Reki grinned, throwing himself onto Langa's lap in a tight hug; Langa hugged back, smiling a wide smile of his own as his arms wrapped around Reki's waist, pulling the red head closer to him.

Langa would never think any less of Reki; of his best friend- and crush.