#so as she said 'its the little things' | Explore Tumblr Posts and Blogs

crunchycrystals · 1 year

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this makes me want to cry

#crunchyposts #pjo #pjotv #guys i also have been obsessed with this series for years it means so much to me that the actors are also fans of the book #it doesnt mention it here but i know leah's said that she was so excited to play annabeth to be 'the girl in her brothers books'#since she got his old copies when he left for college (?)#this means absolutely everything to me rep in media means so much to me bc of how little i understood myself as a kid since i never saw #anyone like me and pjo was the first time i saw someone whse brain was kidna like mine and so many things clicked into place after that #and as a queer girl and someone who's south east asian i rarely saw anyone like me on tv and ive still never seen any demiro char on screen #but now they actually have a non white nd character and its /my/ favorite character and its gonna mean so much to younger black girls #100 #150 #200 #300 #400 #500 #1k #1.5k #2k

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puppyeared · 6 months

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i like him

#somebody needs to keep me 8 metres away at all times or else ill start chewing on him #i just want everyone to know if i end up making a character who happens to resemble harvey in any shape or form #it probably wasnt a coincidence 😐and it will happen again #if i remember maybe ill try getting stardew when it goes on sale.. my friend showed me her farm and she named her chicken after doja cat #or maybe it was nikki minaj i cant remember. and she also said smth about monsters and passing out if you stay out after a certain hour #idk how accurate tht is all i know is the funny fucked up grandpas bed #i read somewhere that harveys supposed to be in his early to mid thirties and i dont have a problem with it but i think itd be very funny #if hes actually younger than he looks hes just a med school postgrad lmao. idk how well that headcanon would hold up since ive #never played the game and idk how often ppl talk about his age or if itsjust an implied thing. i just think its really really funny #im trying to get into the habit of drawing poses so im using reference images to try and build up muscle memory #i found some cute pictures of two ppl playing by the sea shore and it reminded me of xin and sailor so im gonna draw em like that #i havent drawn em in so long..... maybe i should update xins reference since i changed their lore quite a bit #myart #my art #doodles #stardew valley #stardew #sdv #sdv harvey #kinda wanna see him whimper a little bit. as a treat

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chessb0r3d · 9 months

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i cracked the code.

#believing dirk is the worst guy because its what dirk thinks of himself #ignoring daves bisexuality and think hes a gay man in denial even when he explained hes bisexual #believing john 'im not a homosexual' egbert is explicitly straight while he makes out with his mcconahey and cameron posters more #than he kissed women(literally only once)#believing that rose is an edgy psyhcotic little bitch when she was neglected. she speaks elegantly to cover that shes silly and a total ner #and how did people forget that rose also writes gay wizard fanfiction. reads Wikipedia. and her beautiful artstyle as a result of neglect #(and by neglect meaning having SO MUCH TIME to draw)#jake wasnt into dirk. he also told di that he didnt like how brobot getting touchy with him during strifes #but as part of the repression 4(prospit kids). he refused on changing the bot settings #what jane said about roxy being better when she was drunk. it was fucking sarcasm. its the least insane shit you could say to a best friend #all the kids have issues and of course people get mad over a girl being sarcastic.#when KARKAT said THE SAME THING to rose when she was drunk on the meteor nobody bats an eye #trolls are just grey humans that are bugs. he doesnt get an excuse for being an alien. humans were made from KARKATS BLOOD #jade isnt all silly girl and is so FULL OF HATE towards the trolls. she called karkat a fuckass (VERY FUNNY) to do her a favor #“jade would rather have punched karkat in the fact then had a pleasent conversation with him.”#“she viewed the trolls as rude mean and cruel. and even thought that nepeta was just making fun of her.#despite it being that nepeta just wanted to roleplay and have fun."#dred.loki #I HAVE YET TO ADD MORE. THESE ARE JUST NOTES #homestuck #chss

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fluentisonus · 2 months

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chiens-loups

#''it strikes me that i know that girl'' <- lines that sit in your head forever and ever. narrative parallels of all time #thoughts #my art #les mis #javert #eponine #victor hugo said we've had nice parallels between a middle aged man and a young girl. now it's time for fucked up parallels #i had a whole collection of these w the two of them about parallels/cycles/javert perpetuating the same system that hurt him. but #they're barely sketches so i'll just post this on its own #there's a version of this with ghostly dogs things curled around them which was fun to do but felt a little too silly/reductive/unclear #so i took it out. altho i had a fun bit abt how their different collars represented their character #also not completely sure how i picture eponine but trying things out. i was really thinking abt how in her first appearance hugo emphasizes #that she is still a child even though she doesn't see herself that way & she's been forced to grow up quickly & was sort of trying to #reflect that. the odd area in mid teenage idk #still not Entirely happy with how i've structured/positioned it but it's been sitting on my computer for weeks so i may as well post it

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luck-of-the-drawings · 6 months

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[<==PREV PAGES] [NEXT PAGE==>(not out yet.wait a year.or maybe more.imagine.]

saw alot of comments on prev pages; saying 'i HATE that mean teacher! im gonna FIGHT HIM!!' & i LOVE the energy!! it WOULD be nice. to have that catharsis. but the story of young tidestrider is Not one of catharsis. it is a story of being so small and so special and sucking so bad.

#jrwi fanart #jrwi show #jrwi riptide #gillion tidestrider #GONNA START FORMATTING MY COMICS BETTER. W THE PROPER 'PREV' 'NEXT' LINKS #REALLY DIDNT EXPECT TO CONTINUE THIS SERIES BUT AAAUUUHH MY BRRAAAIN MY BRAIN IS SO IDEASSS. I HAVE 3 OTHER PAGES SKETCHED OUT #NO PROMISES ILL FINISH EM ANY TIME SOON OR EVER. MY WHIMS ARE THEIR OWN BEAST AND I ONLY DRAW ON MY WHIMS #THAT BEING SAID IF U COMMISSIONED ME ILL GEEETT TO YOUUU IM SORRYYYY. ART IS AN EMOTIONAL RELEASE FOR ME N BABY I HAVE EMOTIONS.#ESPECIALLY ABOUT GILLION TIDESTRIDER CHAMPION OF THE UNDERSEA HERO OF THE DEEP.for the desc here i put smth that i typed up in the tags of #another thing i made. i gotta make a proper Baby Gillion tag or smth. eventually.. eventually...I LOVE DRAWIN THIS LIL BABY GUY..#i also LOVE depicting the teachers as just being so fuckin mean. ofc theres variation in that. just like in all things.like the teacher her #idk if itll be mentioned but the octo lady is named Ms Octburn.an octopus pun based off the name of an actual councilor i had #when i was in elementary school i got bullied alot but teachers never did anything. i hated adults and didnt trust them.#but this councilor o mine was so genuinely sweet. i remember spending alot of time w her. she doesnt work there anymore.#but that one school adult that actually earns ur trust and is there for you when they can be.its SO important for a child i think #i hope she knows how much she helped me.youll see in the next page that ms octburn isnt perfect either.but she tries. they all try.somehow.#ALL these comics are gonna be inspired by somesorta experience o mine in the school system. school is so fucked up u ever thing abt that #AND GILLIOOOOONNN IN THE MOST FUCKED UP LITTLE SCHOOL OF ALL. MAINTAINED BY A CULT. CENTERED AROUND HIM. OUR CHOSEN ONE #I IMAGINE ALOT BANKS ON HIS SUCCESS. THIS IS THE WORLD. THE WHOLE WORLD. THE PROPHECY IS GOING TO COME TRUE N UR TELLIN ME #THAT ITS THIS LITTLE IDIOT THATS GONNA BE SAVING US? WHAT IF HE FAILS. IF HE CANT GET THIS RIGHT THEN HE WILL FAIL AND WE WILL DIE #WE NEED TO TRAIN HIM. WE NEED HIM TO LEARN. AND TO SUCCEED. OR ELSE WE'RE DEAD. WE'RE ALL FUCKING DEAD. I IMAGINE THAT MUST BE STRESSFUL #in other news i hope ppl actually giggle when they read these. they ARE intended to be comical. dark humor or whatever. like its also sad #this is intended to be a sad comic series. but a funny one too. does that make sense? god i hope so.saw some1 say they had flashbacks-#-reading this. like YES!! THE INTENDED EFFECT!! YOU GET ME!! i love seeing ppl get upset on this lil baby boys behalf. i LOVE seeing ppl-#-wail n weep n cry in the comments. i LOOOVE seeing ppl RELATE to baby gillion. and i love letting u all know that this wont be a happycomi #gillion gets his happiness arc in the actual show. this series is one of unfortunate events. teehehehe. do u guys remember that show #i keep listening to the lil songs from A Series of Unfortunate Events for inspiration. GOOD STUFF!!#anyway uuhh uhh thats all i got in my brain. for now. feed me ur comments give me ur input i NNEEEEEDD THHEEEMMMM

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bacchuschucklefuck · 4 months

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love thinking kipperlilly spends her afterlife looking for lucy in a familiar forest

#not art #fhjy #fhjy spoilers #like. does she have a mean of knowing lucy and yolanda got sent to cassandra's domain to hang out for a bit #kipperlilly's isolation means so much to me. she is punished for everything she's done she just doesn't pick up on it #until the moment she dies! one more funky thing that mirrors riz in which he's actively tried to cultivate a community and denied it #until the bad kids. while kipperlilly does not want or care about a community she just wants someone who validates her #but she does Need a community so she latches onto the person she lets closer to her to fulfill her emotional needs #she took the ritual willingly so this might genuinely be her first death. probably terrifying #probably not even enough bandwidth to feel mortified. maybe immediately seeking something comforting out of instinct alone #lmao honestly thinking too much abt fantasy high afterlifes gives me a headache And a visceral fear #Im not religious but I grew up in a culture with a dominantly buddhist/taoist cosmology its Scary that u just go to A Place after u die!!#and then ur still urself!!! thats scary to me what do u mean u stay like that forever. thats fucked #but yeah I think this influences how I see kipperlilly turn out a little bit. in a sense I think of her as being a ghost now #yknow. trying to solve something from life so she can move on and. stop living this life etc #man the reveal that lucy took being killed pretty seriously and is like yeah the others are decent and even sweet #and probably was just trying to hold her party together and do what she thinks is moral by hearing kipperlilly out #lol lmao etc. gods I gotta wonder how kipperlilly's mindset handled jawbones' help #it really is damn tragic tho. I stand by what I said folks like this will complain and be nasty to be around #but they dont have enough desire to inconvenience themselves to off the bat do something abt what they find unfair or whatever #its when theyre handed the seemingly very easy means to be right that they'll start being dangerous #its horribly tragic that the supposed metaplayer and the self-perceived mastermind turned out to ultimately be just an useful idiot #yknow what. I think personally in my heart kipperlilly moves on from her afterlife the moment she says sorry #doesnt even have to be to lucy but that's probably gonna be who received it #ah.... teenage rebellion. teenage gamejacking

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doodleodds · 2 years

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Me? Uploading a Halloween comic on November 18th, almost four whole-ass weeks late???? Yeah that’s uh. yup. yeah

Thanks for reading! :) <3

#persona 5 #p5 #akira kurusu #OUGH OH MY GOD ITS FINALLY. DONE. I AM LOSING MY MIND #if you've been following me for long enough: yes! this IS in fact the comic i mentioned that i was making last year.#Fun fact! This is also! The Third Draft of said comic!!! i have redrawn this thing THREE FUCKING TIMES #as a result you may notice that i uh. a) gave up on coloring this thing. no way in HELL am i coloring 30 pages. im not...strong enough #you will settle for simply having monochrome colored panels and you will LIKE IT!!!!! >:OOOOO #and b) gave up on backgrounds! yeah fuck that lmao. i am never drawing people in the monabus again and mementos can kiss my ass!!!!!#i just want to draw my silly little characters & not their environments #and you may also say: sophia. by halloween they are already in Sae's palace. why isn't goro with them and where's haru?#and to that i say shhhh suspend your disbelief. akechi is in mementos carving pumpkins to avoid trick or treaters.#and also haru isn't there because i cannot draw 6+ people in a cramped space yet!!! my art skills are Just Not There Quite Yet :(#so she's staying home and handing out fullsized candy bars to kids. that's where she is while this is all going down #'does akira know it's akechi down there?' :) that's up to you! but i WILL say that I was thinking about Akeshu when i wrote this so. :))))#ANYWAY if you read this far in the tags im so sorry lmao. thanks for sticking around! Hope you had a happy halloween :)#hopefully i won't disappear for long this time. idk im just gonna start uploading other bullshit art in the interim between comics i guess #probably some fire emblem shit. we'll see. we'll see. anyway bye!! till next time!

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crow-quet · 5 months

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been seeing these little design challenges on twitter re: warrior cats so i decided to try my hand at it with the tigerclones !!! :3

#warrior cats #my art #warriors #tigerstar #(both of them LMAOOOO)#tigerclaw #tigerheart #brambleclaw #bramblestar #lightleap #hawkfrost #also i KNOWWWW tigerheart was later changed to be a dark brown tabby but WUAGHHHH #he was originally a golden tabby so i kinda merged the two ideas together #i just think its cute to have him match his grandma a little more 🥺#since she was golden and everything #even if its just a teensy bit!#also he's said to look like brambleclaw also so i tried to like mirror their markings a little bit while still like #keeping them distinct enough #lightleap gets freckles like dovewing and also the same pretty eyelashes :3 #shes also more desaturated bc dove is grey + the dark coat is just like in her family tree LOL #me: aw itll b fun to have ppl guess :) also me: distinctly says why i did things on what characters #warrior cats designs #wc designs #warriors fanart #warrior cats fanart

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bugeyedfreaks · 2 months

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I bought the comic! 💖

I have a couple of my usual little minor nitpicks (as I am want to have), but I don’t even want to get into them because there were so few and they didn’t impact my enjoyment of the comic all that much. I thought it was super cute!

I won’t spoil anything in case anyone’s interested in buying it for themselves (which, I would say… yeah, buy it, totally!), but what I appreciated the most– especially since this is the first issue and it’s establishing who the girls are for anyone not super familiar with them– is that the girls end up saving the day together. It shows the importance of them not just being heroes, but also being a team (and also being supportive sisters, which… 🥹🫶) and that makes me feel like, even on a basic level, they get the characters. And that’s reassuring! Yay!

#and GODDDDDD Ms. Bellum being there….. just……. thank you 🙏#there were a couple of things that just made me very very happy #MINI SPOILERS AHEAD =>#I thought Him’s little robot destiny test-y guys were cute and fun but he’s not really a rooobooottt guuuyyyy ehhhhhh but like whatever #the comic was basically Super Zeroes but for a new comic book run for people not familiar with the characters…#…like I said I think that’s totally fine because the characters are being established!#it had a bit of its own twist and it worked!#buttercup’s compliment to blossom at the end… yeah she’s a great loner SHE COULD CARRY A SERIES BY HERSELF SHE IS THAT GREAT 😤#but she must be bubbles and buttercup’s brain cell… so of course it’s imperative that she leads them haha #there were some weird OOC-ish dialogue but again nothing that made me go like ???????#I could complain but I genuinely feel like this was honestly fine and good and cute and you know what?#hooray and good job to everyone involved I like it 👍#I’ll totally get the next issue when it comes out BUT THE DESCRIPTION OF IT WORRIES ME LMAOOOOOO #comic #powerpuff girls #ppg

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cerealbishh · 4 months

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"We get to, this season, explore their chemistry and their real love and their intimacy. So we get to have a glimpse into that world that just feels so pure and beautiful and romantic! And then, sort of navigating those other circumstances once they're out in the world, dealing with real... challenges." - Isa in an interview with The Knockturnal(x)

#outer range s2 #outer range s2 spoilers #maria olivares #rhett abbott #isabel arraiza #lewis pullman #there was an article that said that maria and rhett may screw royal over? i say they should go for it! /hj #rhett x maria #i know the last gif is blurry but trust me she was holding his arm and i just thought that was adorable #i might add a lew quote if he ever gets asked about outer range s2 in an interview smh(i'm begging someone to ask him more about it!)...#the biggest fucking grin on her face whenever they kiss #her smile and him smiling back at her before the forehead kiss is EVERYTHING to me #also her little smile as he kisses the side of her head like she knows he's doing his best but knows that it's unlikely that he's leaving..#truly if it gives isa and lew more screen time i'm all for it!#i say all this but i still want a spin-off of them just on a roadtrip #i am convinced that he kisses her just because he thinks she's being really cute #i kinda had a feeling that was maria in the trailer doing something to rhett in the trailer(iykyk) and my heart still fell into my stomach #i'm not including any dream/nightmare sequences because as far as we know they can't see the future... right?#do i sound stupid and biased? maybe... please don't judge me #she's hungry but her heart aches to stay... will the flesh have its way in s3? will she be ... ''already gone'' a la eurydice in hadestown?#tw: food?#will forever be sad they didn't get a dance :(#the way he makes her giggle and smile before kissing her in the car? PLEASE #maybe leaving is her way of fixing things for the both of them so he doesn't have to choose between her and his family?#and so he doesn't have to feel guilt for holding her back every time he looks at her... but girlie have a proper conversation PLS

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possamble · 3 months

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Going back to work after this but

#i mean ill be doing laios and marcille genfic content regardless and you cant stop me but #this isnt something that necessarily has to happen in little creature so im just testing the waters #my sick little brain. and its love for putting these two in all the trappings of a het relationship #while its still completely platonic #i just. she is so pathetic and little and clingy when shes horribly beartbroken #and he is her big stupidest puppy in the world #she would preemptively like. yell at him and hit him with books and pillows and swear that if he makes it weird she'll kill him #while he literally hasnt said a word about it #and then she'd curl up like a shrimp so compact he could hold all of her in just his arms #and it would literally cause so much drama if anyone else saw but he doesnt care bc she needs it #and bc he and falin are the only ones she feels THAT safe with #he is all she has when she needs to cry *about* falin #polls #a little creature #sorry. i just.#she is the closest thing to a girlfriend he has and he is the closest thing to a boyfriend she has and its all platonic and i #[feral noises]#“boyfriend” but its your platonically life bonded himbo with the same cup size as you who could lift you with one arm #or EASILY cover your entire body with his just by crouching over you a little #and also he will be the happiest man alive at your wedding to his sister

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roseworth · 6 months

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Wait ok I'm not knowledgeable on anything Wilson family. Slade drugs Rose???

yeah <///3 before tt03 they had met like once ever (and it went poorly) so to get rose on his side slade injected her with a super soldier serum

in #0.5 he kidnaps her after buying a hit on her (many such cases) and goes "cmon rose we can be a family lets be a family <3333" and she agrees (because shes angry and slade is the one handing her a weapon to kill the man that killed her mother)

then theyre on the same side for a while! the first time we hear about the serum (and iirc only time its specifically mentioned while shes being drugged) is in #12 (BART 🥺)

we also see some flashbacks in fresh hell of slade giving her the serum too

anyways then she joins the team and everything is alright (lie). this is the first confirmation that she was being drugged, plus also showing that shes staying on the team just bc shes afraid slade will get her again :(

in any story that takes place from 2003-2006 that includes rose & slade (bg #63-64, nightwing #112-115, etc), rose is being drugged :(

basically the writers needed an explanation for why she would choose to work with slade and wanted an excuse for why she would be able to join the titans later on and honestly? rare johns banger. this plotline fucks to me. completely defines rose's relationship with slade and gives her a concrete reason to hate him but also have very complicated feelings about her place in his life ouuughhhh

but in conclusion slade sucks so heres some panels of rose beating him up

#i hadn't really thought about it before making this post but its kinda surprising how little the serum gets brought up #i think because its one of the worst things slade has ever done so ppl ignore it to say 'slade is so misunderstood 🥺'#but like. it probably gets brought up less than 5 times in all of tt03 (INCLUDING fresh hell)#and its pretty much never brought up outside of tt03 #even when a book mentions her stabbing her eye out they rarely bring up the fact that she was being drugged when it happened #i dont even think batgirl 2008 said anything about her being drugged?#obv they say that it happened to cass but i dont think it says anything about rose too #and then ofc it hasnt been canon since the new 52. scott lobdell start running #(<- probably not actually his fault but im still blaming him)

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clowningoose · 1 year

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Balloon Sword AU

Further thoughts under the cut

So a good while ago I got a balloon sword and thought wouldn't it be funny If the duels were fought with balloon swords then I got serious about it

So besides the swords being balloons, the roses are too

The first idea in regards to this was the duelists using what is essentially a toy in battle, a childish imitation of a sword fight

The second had to do with empty desires, what motivates them to fight. They have swords, but they're filled with nothing but air, merely a shell to hold almost nothing at all

Coming to the roses I thought Anthys blowing up the balloons is in a way the inflation of the duelists desire and them then being molded into motivation to battle, folding the balloon into the form of a rose

It'd also make a very nice sound when the balloon is popped, literally exploding on their chests

I had imagined that around the black rose arc we could possibly switch over to real swords

Visually I Imagine the sword pulls of the arc as a balloon floating out of their chests on a string to then be exploded by the sword inside piercing the balloon

From then on out real swords would be used, the roses remain balloons

Not entirely sure what to do with the Sword of Dios, it could either be replaced by a real one once Utena gets hers pulled out of her chest, it stays a balloon sword forever or it only turns into a real sword in the very last episodes

#Revolutionary Girl Utena #rgu #Balloon au #anthy himemiya #nanami kiryuu #juri arisugawa #saionji kyouichi #ChuChu amongst other things is a stand-in for Anthys true Feelings #The balloon a pretty little toy with a drawn on smile a confrontation of ChuChu and Balloon ChuChu the confrontation of Anthy and the perso #Had it not exploded it would have deflated anyway its not meant to be maintained forever #But even the balloon shell is destroyed by being dressed up like Akio #And hits ChuChu in the face to top it Off #Anthys role is the one people want her to play but despite all that she ist still hated both for doing so and for not doing so #It is part of this very role to be hated and even making oneself palatable is not enough to escape said hatred #In the end no matter what you do people seek your destruction

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vaugarde · 30 days

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havent seen this take in a while thankfully but it popped up in my head and i wanna post this anyways. i think everyone who talks about how siffrin “got off too easy” at the end of isat and his friends should have abandoned him should go read warrior cats if they want an example of a character using their trauma as their god-given jailbreak card to treat their family and peers (a good amount of whom who were completely innocent) like dogshit, and who faces zero consequences from the narrative for it (and in fact bends over to blame their peers). like read all the shit jayfeather does while the narrative sobs over how tragic but awesome and quirky he is and then look me in the eye and tell me siffrin’s ending was poorly written.

#or look at titania from reborn. what who said that #at least siffrin’s trauma is actually developed and taken deadly seriously by the narrative and clearly isnt being used to excuse his behav #behavior #siffrin does some shitty things in the story but theyre very obviously in a horrible state mentally and physically thats been breaking them #down little by little by little until theyve exploded and broken down. and his family still holds him accountable for what he did #but they stay with him anyways because they love and respect and care about him and are horrified to learn his situation #meanwhile ivypool goes through trauma yeah but shes not really written like a realistic trauma victim #and when she hurts her sister over and over and over and over and over again its always her sister who has to make it up at the end #and we all gotta sob and coo over ivy because shes the fan favoriteand if you criticize her then you hate trauma victims #(ignoring dovewing’s trauma from the situation as well i might add)#while ivy never gets to grow or acknowledge how her attitude is hurtful to herself and others #its just ‘’well dovewing had it better so she better shut the fuck up and deal with the constant emotional abuse ivy throws at her’’#imagine if isat ended with siffrin going ‘’actually im not sorry bc you all havent suffered as much as me’’#and the party didnt object to that at all and they were like ‘’yes we do have it better so youre justified in hurting us #and also you are the most tragic character ever so you cant face emotional consequences ever’’#(and before anyone goes ‘’well dovewing left the clan and ivypool feels bad about that’’ the story doesnt position it as a consequence of #her behavior to her sister. canonically shes leaving to be with her baby daddy and SHES framed as the one hurting her sister #and shes the one whos gotta mend that rift. while the narrative doesnt acknowledge that that situation was partly her sisters fault at all #)#ok sorry for wc on main jumpscare. i wouldve posted over on the blog but i dont think people over there have played isat #echoed voice #isat spoilers

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safety-pin-punk · 2 months

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yall Im so fucking tired. This month has been exhausting. I promise Im alive, just barely functional atm.

#personal #rant below #begining of the month docs said dad had less than a month. Hes still around but declining #been taking care of him and my mom #along with working full time #and my boyfriend doing his damndest to keep me busy when Im not helping with dad #which is great except Im so tired #but also I havent been able to sleep much #and I've lost my appetite which apparently is a grief thing I didn't know about #So I've managed to get all the physical grief symptoms and it is taking a fucking toll #so your girl is sleeping in tomorrow and spending the day doing my own little crafts and avoiding people as much as I can #a girl just wants some sleep and a fulfilling snack but all she is being given are slight naps and unappealing food. send help.#anyways after this experience Ive decided that I no longer give any fucks because you only live once so Im just gonna do what I want foreve #and actually live life instead of being constrained by societal standards #after all this is over of course. gotta take care of dad first #also I got to paint the door because he was sick of staring at the porch. so its a lake view now #woooo #yeah so thats my life update for you all #also I saw a girl for the first time in 9 years today who completely changed the tradgetory of my life and didn't know it. so that was fun.#exhausing but fun #also idgaf about spelling right now I am running on caffeine and pure will power atm

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perilegs · 1 month

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my sweet little baby man is no longer with us

#he had his bloodwork done yesterday and the vet said it was fine but he doesnt have much time left #and my bestie is a vet tech who wanted to see the lab results bc she always does and she looked at them #and asked me if she can shiw them to her boss today and i was like sure and immediately knew something was up #today keekki was being himself #then i went to run some errands and when i came back he was laying in front of the front door with his tiny baby head against it #and i was like ''oh ok one of his seizures?''#and theyre like. keekki will drool and not move and they usually last for like 20 minutes (several vets have no idea whats up with those #but it was probably either a kidney or a blood pressure thing)#anyways. it did not pass in 20 minutes so i Knew #i laid on the floor next to him #then my bff sent me a message asking me if i have the time to talk about keekki and its not good news #at this point i was about to call the vet anyways #and she was like ''ok i showed these to my boss (a vet) and she got super angry that ur vet even let you leave the clinic''#bc apparently keekkis bloodwork was so bad he should have been put down then and there but my vet was like a fresh half graduate #so i dont hold it against her. anyways i got an euthanasia appointment for this evening and spent the time before it laying on the couch #crying with keekki in my arms #i had to carry him bc he couldnt really walk without stumbling and falling down #when i had to get up to get his carrier and stuff ready he was taking a nap on the couch where i left him and i took this pic #anyways worst vet visit of my life i could hardly even do anything but nod half the time bc speaking results in me sobbing #anyways. this fucking sucks #i dont know how ill be able to sleep tonight #its been years since i last slept at home without having a little guy plop into my arms #i spent a long time with him in the vet room when he was gone #it feels surreal ive given him his last ever forehead kisses #as i left the room i told him bye the exact same way ive been saying bye to him for the last very many years ive had him #its always moikka keekki before i go to work or the store or literally anything #and that was my last moikka keekki #i hope he felt how loved he was #my dad is sending me older pics of me and keekki and he looks so happy in them. hes always right next to me #idk man im going to stop rambling now

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