#so excuse me for the lack of content in this post but maybe someone likes the idea anyways

[voidcat]

Blade & number 13 (trying to get the other to dance with them)

wc: 1k & gn!reader. reader is implied to be a stellaron hunter

a/n: posting this separately instead of answering the ask because tumblr decided to delete it(-:

The venue is bustling with noise and energy all around.

Everyone around is lost in the excitement, patiently waiting for the orchestra to return, for the grand party to start. All donned in tailored clothes, some going for masks, some for ridiculously big hats– a scene out of a movie or a novel, if you’d say so yourself. Were it not for your dearest partner’s grunts and huffs every once in a while to drag you out of the sweet dream.

Blade has been assigned to several missions back to back already, you’d understand the burnout and the exhaustion that comes with it. And still, no matter the work or the goals to tick off, you find a way to enjoy each moment– or so you console yourself, in the words of Silverwolf.

The muffled sounds stop in a sudden and a one, a two, a three– you can hear the famous orchestra starting the evening.

You cast a glance Blade’s way. Changed into something other than his usual clothes, the suit fits him perfectly. Elio had said it’d be wise to blend in, even though your jobs were minor compared to Silverwolf’s. Just keep an eye on, and maybe enjoy the evening, consider it a little gift. And grateful you were, practically giddy since you were informed of what the mission entailed.

Yet a part of you fears dragging Blade into all this, guilt sitting heavy at your belly. The lack of reactions, save for the occasional scoffs when someone dashes too close to him, do not help you once bit. A drink might help, or so you think and return with two glasses, offering one to him.

The drink melts on your tongue, relaxes all the muscles in your body. Known for its balls and events, even their drinks hold no competition. A glance Blade’s way and you can see him slowly sipping his drink, content just to see that much, hoping it might help his mood throughout the evening and until your departure.

Time ticks and by then, everyone in the grand salon has immersed themselves into dancing, swinging gracefully with the melody. The soft notes of the grand piano fills the air, the violins join in, even just from the sounds, you can picture the pianist’s fingers gliding off, flying off the keys, no longer just making music but crafting something sacred, something holy into life with mere presses.

The orchestra carries away the people, and with their melodies, they capture you too. You don’t notice Blade’s staring, nor him gently taking the glass off your hands and offering them to one of the servants making his rounds down there.

The melody rises and rises, picking up its face and with a snap, ends, taking your breath with it.

A moment’s pause and a waltz begins.

Turning hurriedly Blade’s way, hands balled into fists, you look so excited, stars in your eyes– he worries for a second if he got caught.

“Please.” you say in a whisper, and he looks at you with curiosity, please, what?..

“Just one dance, would you grant me this much?” you ask, hands dropping down, stroking the fabric of your outfit now, fiddling with the little embroidered details. Blade stands there, still silent, contemplating an answer, lips parted. “It’d help blend into the crowd too, you know… so we can keep not just an eye but also an ear out.” you try one last time, one last attempt. It feels easier to use the mission as an excuse than to admit you just want to stand closer to him, be like one of those couples you have been admiring for the past hour.

Eyes cast to the side, Blade avoids your gaze. Unsure how to feel when you followed with that excuse just to rationalize your request. Waiting and waiting, another song begins and draws close to an end and Blade realizes too late when he notices the signs of your fidgeting that he’s been making you wait, making you nervous and–

“Fine.” he says, his voice betraying the blunt answer and he reaches out his palm to you.

Eyes wide open, you freeze for a moment and snap out of it when he raises an eyebrow at you, slightly shaking his offered hand. With a skip to your step, you take his hand and a violin fills the air, lazy and faint.

The waltz begins softly, building up, and with it, so do the two of you.

Though you were unsure what to expect, Blade proves to be in control so far, taking the steps accordingly, swinging to the melody. 

It is a simple ballroom waltz, easy to pick up on after observing the people for the past hour. Seeing that the expression of surprise is still evident on your face, accompanying a soft smile, Blade feels a satisfaction blooming in his chest.

Were the purpose to truly keep an eye out and listen in, this would truly serve as the most ideal cover to blend in to the crowd– but too lost in your own little bubble, all the two of you can hear, feel, sense, see, and smell are each other; and the fairy-tale music that carries you throughout the ballroom with each step.

Blade holds you close and holds you gently, leading you into the dance, loosening his grip enough so you can dance freely. The dance goes on and you feel lost in his warm hold. For the first time in a long while forlorn eyes carry the gentle autumn breeze within their orbs, a man more than just the blade he wields, broken down to fragments. The melody picks up and Blade leads you for a spin, his other hand waiting in the air to pull you back to him–

In a sudden a loud crack echoes in the air.

The music halts, darkness overtakes the ballroom right after. The both of you frozen in place, Blade prepares to unsheathe his sword, his other hand standing over your skin still, keeping you close to his chest in a protective manner.

At the surprise of the moment for a second, the grand space is dead silent. And soon after follows people’s worried murmurs, followed by a scream that is never missing in such environments.

Silverwolf must be done with her part already. 

As you let out a sigh, you feel Blade’s hand relax on you, and returning to his side. Taking a step back, you copy the gesture and remove your hands from his frame. 

Time to bid goodbye to the fairytale it seems.

[licorice-tea]

Don’t Fall In Love With Me (Yet)

Pairing: Trafalgar Law x reader

Content: strawhat!reader, gender neutral reader, feelings and fluff (my faves🤞🏽), so much tension, no resolution of that tension… yet😏, lowkey “i hate everyone but you” trope, very brief mention of some canon typical violence, but no actual violence <3

Word Count: 1.3k

A/N: lalalalala i love law😇 i actually wrote about twice as much as what’s here to begin with, but i felt like it was too long for one post, so i might upload it as a second part later if anyone wants that! as always ty for the love, and i hope you enjoy! (did i write this instead of finishing part 3 of my Zoro mini series? perchance. (that will be up soon though!))

Part 2

It’s a day like any other on board the Thousand Sunny- calm waters, music, occasional shouting, and just one abnormality. Law, captain of the Heart Pirates, is a guest on board the Strawhat Crew’s ship in the aftermath of Dressrosa. And despite their hospitality, he finds practically everything about life on board their ship to be draining…

Every potentially quiet moment is interrupted by the crew’s shenanigans.

For starters: the cook and swordsman argue over every little thing, and most of their arguments escalate into fights. The navigator is actually a petty thief or a con-artist at best, and her double, the sniper, takes it upon himself to cause dangerous explosions at least once a day. The musician is an incredibly loud pervert, though the shipwright is somehow even louder and more dramatic. The archeologist is alright- she’s quiet, but Law finds her constant observation more eery than comforting. And the captain is still somehow convinced that his doctor could be used as a source of “emergency food.” Then there’s you; the one who brings whatever you’re working on at the time up to the deck so you can work in the sunlight, wears your weapons like they’re accessories, who only takes breaks from working to visit with your nakama, and always offers a charming smile when you catch Law staring… which happens multiple times in the course of the day.

Law is often irritated, rigid, and cold- so different from your own optimistic and nonchalant demeanor. At breakfast, he doesn’t talk much. Just eats his meal and thanks Sanji before excusing himself to go pour over anatomy books from the ship’s library. He does so for hours, not once joining the Strawhat Crew on deck or even taking time to explore the ship on his own. Nami frequents the library, as well, but she’s taken to drawing maps in her room or on deck since their guests arrival. When night begins to settle overhead, he may return to the kitchen for a cup of coffee, before going right back to his work.

At first, one might have been inclined to think Law didn’t like y/n at all. They can often see his gaze trained on them form from the corner of their eye, but chooses to ignore it sometimes and address it with a smile others. He almost never speaks to them if possible, only offering a nod or a mumbled response to whatever they says. But, he goes out of his way to sit by them at mealtimes and to find himself in the same narrow hallways as them, so that their arms brush. Those are the moments he obsesses over in his mind while he dozes off from his textbooks- the feel of their skin against his, and their kind acknowledgements- always void of harsh judgment.

It’s not just the lack of cruelty in essentially eveything they do, to Law; it’s the presence of love. Love for their nakama, their work, people and places they barely know, even him. He doesn’t recall ever having met someone so full of love that goes beyond superficial kindness- because they can be sarcastic and moody at times- besides perhaps Corazon.

And to y/n, there’s just something about Law that peaks their interests. Maybe it’s the feeling of having someone new around, or something even more indescribable and foreign to the pirate.

Zoro is asleep in the men’s cabin tonight, so y/n is keeping watch. It’s the usual arrangement for the 2 night owls of the crew- when Zoro has truly exhausted his body, he sleeps below deck with the others, and y/n has no trouble staying up through the night.

They turn on some quiet music on their speaker, a must have for any music lover. For a while, they just watch the sea and sky. Nights at sea are like a blackout. But, there is no need for light with strong eyesight and the even stronger moon and starlight.

So it’s no surprise that they see, just out of the corner of their peripheral vision, the top of a white and black speckled hat bobbing up and down as it moves toward the kitchen. Y/n’s eyes widen ever so slightly and their breath catches in their throat. The guest makes them feel silly, in a way, for not being able to discern their own feelings toward him, nor his toward them. They get so caught up in their thoughts about him that eventually they give up. Y/n shakes their head, mentally chastising themself for even being embarrassed or flustered in the first place. And with that confidence boost, they decide to go talk to him.

Next thing they know, y/n is standing before the kitchen door with no plan in mind for what they’re going to say to their crew’s ally. They open the door, but he doesn’t look up from the coffee brewing on the stove.

Y/n clears their throat to announce their presence, and Law whips his head around to see who it is. They offer a friendly smile and a little wave.

“Hi.” They speak softly, as if afraid to break the peace of the night.

A beat passes with no response from Law. Internally, he wishes they hadn’t walked in on him at this moment. The light from the overhead lamp catches in their eyes, and he feels entirely too seen. Not in the way he feels seen by someone like Robin, though, whose constant observation makes him feel uncomfortable; like one wrong move and he’ll have hell to pay for. No; y/n sees him and he’s scared that he might start spewing nonsense to avoid revealing his feelings. And suddenly his cheeks are on fire, and everything is quiet, and all he can focus on is the stars in their eyes that he tries so desperately to look away from.

They tilt their head, likely in concern, and he pulls himself out of his thoughts to mumble, “Hey.”

“Cant sleep?” y/n questions, their starry eyes (as described by Law) flickering over the coffee pot on the counter and back to him.

Law shrugs, then pulls his hat lower over his eyes to hopefully hide his warm face. “I wasn’t trying to sleep.”

“Hm…” they hum in response, “Want to keep watch with me then? If you aren’t busy.”

He thinks they’re just being friendly, like always. When they first met, Law was confused. It made no sense for someone so mild mannered to have a bounty of well over 500 million (now almost double that amount in the time that’s passed), though he didn’t doubt that looks could be deceiving. But even in the midst of battle, of which the two had been in several together, they refused to take kill shots or anything of the sort. So he was still unsure of how they had earned such an impressive reward for their capture. Still, they clearly had a high regard for life, and he had come to learn that they truly were just that kind hearted, not to mention witty and generous. And judging by the “Sora: Warrior of The Sea” sticker he’d noticed on small a journal they carried, which was one amongst many; a bit of a nerd, too. All of these things and more had made Law secretly impartial to them. Or at least, those were the reasons he has listed in his mind to make sense of these feelings.

So he nodded, much to their surprise, and mumbled again “Sure.”

The curve of their smile opens up into a grin, and y/n leaves while fully expecting Law to follow (whenever his coffee was ready.) Which, he does.

[never-forget-viva-la-pluto]

To the SPN fans that are hating on good omens rn bc of the leak, I hope you choke. I've seen some really nasty shit today from some of my (now unfollowed) followers whom I followed for spn content. So let's make one thing clear from actual posts ive seen today:

-Saying that the "wrong angels kissed", is...homophobic. I was with destiel from beginning to end and yeah we were completely shafted, but it's not okay to then say that other gay couples in media aren't allowed to kiss just because they aren't the ones you thought were hot. Jesus christ didn't think I needed to write that one down for ya-bo burnham

-I saw so much fatphobia about how Castiel deserved a kiss more than Aziraphel bc "he has far more sex appeal." Wtf wtf wtf. How do you live with yourselves saying that shit?You can pry Micheal Sheens body type Aziraphel out of my cold dead hands, you CW brainwashed morons!

-hate against the author for some reason, no one is willing to give specifics about it, but I think the majority of them maintain that GO is not good rep because they didn't kiss and now they are claiming pandering or something? Honestly that guy has only ever stood with the writers guild and queer people his whole career from what I find so I don't think it's fair whatever hate they are spouting. He isnt even saying he is upset with fans that saw or shared the video. Hes being super nice about it!

-I will say, non of us SPN fans have a fucking leg to stand on when it comes to hating something bc of the authors, OK. I saw someone saying the writing for spn was better and I can say you did not watch the show. I loved spn but don't do the late Terry Pratchett like this. He did nothing wrong

-on that same ish strain, as an ace person who thrives off queerplatonic relationships in media, maybe they kiss, I dunno. I just have to wait until the season comes out. Not 1 SPN fan gets to bitch about GO asexualty rep when SPN never even tried that route with any of its characters. But also ace characters are allowed to kiss, so you can write them that way of you want and interpret them that way if you want still. This is your viewing experience.

-this leak is truly not the same as the SPN yo a ti leak, solely bc the episode hasn't aired yet. "None of you GO fans would have survived the yo a ti leak." No I think you wouldn't bc the spn leak was clinging to an already mangled straw, while the angel's in GO are queer already. Queer queer queer and no amount of kissing or lack thereof is going to change that. We have no idea what happens in that episode of GO, but we saw the creators butcher the only moment in the show that could have meant anything real for queer viewers in SPN.

-"SPN crowly was kissing dudes first so this one is not that impressive". I see two cakes. One was made with the intent to make gay people look evil, but over time got kinda funny and a little better bc gay people liked it, and the other was about telling an interesting story about how love is so important, especially at the end of the world, and gay people liked that one too! So for me it's YaY two cakes!

-again the anti aziraphel is so plainly just fatphobia. You have no excuses. Sorry you don't think someone who looks like a slightly chubby micheal sheen could ever get kissed by someone who looks like David tennant, but you are not only wrong, you are also childish.

OK I'm done. Go watch good omens s2 when it comes out for my fucking sanity please. Or don't if all you are going to do is try to rip it apart like you do to all media that tries to be better.

[amerricanartwork]

More Love for Lilypad

Hi! To be honest, I don’t know why I’m writing this, I guess because reading everything has moved me more than I probably thought.

I don’t know how much text he let me put

I have read the current Lilypad publication and I honestly loved it, otherwise I would be here writing like an excited silly girl.

How do you connect the story of Luna and No Harassment with Sleeping Beauty (From the Disney movie because the original story is horrible, believe me, you wouldn’t want to use it if it were the original), it’s so beautiful that it moved me and connected me more with the ships. how much I love them and lilypad mainly sadly for my part I don’t see much art from them (I think it happens to me with ships that generally are not so popular or so loved, it happens to me with the message of love from SpearmasterXHunter, Godmode SaintXEnot, lilypad and PebblesXSun )

The topic, I loved reading these ideas that come from your ingenious and beautiful imagination, I want to read more of this and that would be all! Nice day/night :3!

PD: As a warning, I don’t know where I had to send this and I’m sorry if I didn’t have to send it here, and I take this opportunity to say that your ArtiXGourmand is simply beautiful and I adore it!

-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-

Oh my, @amaerumeru, thank you so much for this submission!!

I’m so glad to see someone enjoy those ideas so much, and to hear my essay has inspired some more love for these two sweethearts! Seeing people sympathize at least with the fairytale stuff is a very pleasant surprise!

Regarding the lack of content, I feel you, I’ve had my fair share of rarepairs across my fandoms too (heck, I’m even considering adopting a super rare RW ship right now...), and not being able to find content of them is always pretty rough! Although for me, the struggle doesn’t always come from lacking any content of the ship, but lacking the specific kind of content I want for it. 

Part of the reason why I began that extension of the Lilypad essay by listing the ship tropes I love and particularly explaining the main two was because, to me, how a ship is depicted is just as important as which ship is depicted. It’s so much so I actually won’t like content of a ship I normally love if I don’t like the way the characters are and act within it, or if I don’t like the ideas being shown through the characters enough. 

Both situations exist with Lilypad, and although I can excuse the lack of content as Rain World generally not having much canon ship potential, the portrayal struggle is one I have faced in basically every fandom I’ve been in, where no one seems to really appreciate those traditional dynamics I love with the ships I enjoy the most. Most of the time I still enjoy the content because it’s pretty cute and romantic, and I don’t dislike anything about it enough to cancel out that cuteness/romance factor, but it’s still not what I love most, tailored to what I identify with the greatest; I’ll eat it, but it’s not my favorite flavor. And with the New Year and self-improvement being a common focus this time of year, I figured I’d finally get the courage to take my classic art approach with these themes now; if I can’t find someone else who’s made the content I want, I’ll make it myself (like this sketch I drew up for this post), and just maybe they’ll find me!

And find someone I have! Once again, I’m so glad someone appreciates these older fairytale tropes, and I really do feel inspired to openly make more content including these ideas! I’ve always had a habit of thinking about not just ships, but fiction in general through the lens of the poetic significance characters, scenes, and plot points do or can have, and recently I’ve developed a habit of linking characters and ships back to songs and previous characters from other cartoons (like I did with Sleeping Beauty here), and trust me, if you want more content of this sort, I could both write similar essays deriving these themes within other ships AND make a lot more Lilypad content like this! I mean, after posting that addition I realized somehow forgot to talk about “Once Upon a Dream” specifically and how it so perfectly fits this ship, so I’m already probably gonna do a post and drawing on that sometime soon — !

And one last thing, thanks for liking the Artimand stuff too! Artimand is probably a better example of my “I like this ship in general, but I really wanna see more of these traditional themes in content for it“ attitude, so it’s nice to see that’s enjoyable to other people on some level too!

 Big thanks for the submission, a reason to ramble even more about Lilypad and my favorite ship tropes, and inspiration to make that drawing, Meru! And hey, I love hearing the deeper reasons why other people ship what they do too, so if you ever wanna ramble about your own ships, I’m all ears!

[yukidragon]

Hi, so I wanted to ask you something since I've seen you upload some of the public access art from Sauces OG twitter. I know that's the way to do it, I'm in the patreon too and that stuff is protected. What I wanted to ask was if you had some of the OG Gallagher mansion stuff? Like the concepts etc. Pretty much all of it got deleted and I tried looking some up to remind myself of the project and not much is still around. You can privately answer or make a post, it's up to you.

Yup, that’s the way to do it. Don’t repost the privately posted patreon stuff anywhere, and make sure to always credit Sauce for their publicly posted art when shared. They’re kind enough to allow me to use pictures in my headcanon rambles and such, and I want to always give them the credit and praise they deserve for such wonderful art and creative stories and characters for us to play with. They’re awesome and deserve our support.

If you want content to see the project is still going strong, then you’re in luck! There was a recent update on the project over on the SnaccPop Studios’ twitter. Check out this beautiful background. Though, even more enticing is the voiced teaser of the project in this post. We finally get to publicly hear what Elias sounds like and get a glimpse into what the choices might be for the game.

Of course, there are more teasers up on the SnaccPop Studios Patreon, including nudes of Elias. There were some nudes posted by Sauce publicly on their now gone twitter, but tumblr might not take them as artistic nudity and might nuke my blog if I post any images that are too spicy.

That said, there have been brand new public posts with Elias’ fully clothed sprites over on twitter. Check them out here, and maybe say a kind word to the lovely artist while you’re there~

As for the older publicly posted art, there were a couple shown in a previous ask over here. Sadly, I don’t have the very first original concept art where Elias is putting a necklace on his living bride. I do, however, have a picture of big boy Elias carrying his new “bride” but he’s a bit too excited for me to share the picture here in its entirety.

Sadly, I can’t show the rest of this beautiful piece of art by Sauce to give you a better sense of just how big Elias is compared to Y/N (in more than one sense of the word), but the player stand in character here is also naked, and I’m not gonna roll the dice on whether gray anon booty will result in me being smote by the tumblr gods. Such a shame too.

You know, last time I posted a cropped spicy picture of Sauce’s, I wrote a steamy little snippet to go with it. To make up for the lack of the concept art and cropping this picture, how about I write a little Adults Only bit of spice here too? I don’t have my MC for the Groom of Gallagher Mansion solidified in my mind yet (though I do have a few thoughts) so maybe this would be a good excuse to expand my writing skills by trying to tackle some gender-neutral reader-insert fiction for once. I hope you enjoy it.

...

Elias was warmer than I expected for someone who had been dead for at least 100 years. I felt the heat rise where his bare skin touched mine. I knew that I was screwed when I agreed to tie the knot with the lonely ghost of Gallagher Mansion, but I didn’t really expect that literally.

For crying out loud, how could a ghost get a hardon, especially one so big?

Despite how crazy the situation was and how fast we rushed into this marriage, I couldn’t help but feel excited when he brushed up against my thighs as Elias scooped me up into his arms, all hot, hard, and faintly twitching when our skin made contact. He bit his lower lip in a failed attempt to stifle the noise he made that was suspiciously like a whimper.

Damn it. Why did Elias have to be so cute?

Elias lifted me just a little higher so that he could recover from the contact, taking a moment to… catch his breath? Or at least imitate it. Old habits die hard, even in death, it seemed.

I didn’t have much time to dwell on it, as I was caught by the charming smile he sent my way as he spoke my name with so much adoration that my racing heart sped up just a little more. “My dearest beloved, I can’t tell you how excited I am to finally consummate our love.”

“I can tell,” I said, and immediately I was rewarded by the darkening blue hue of his cheeks that I knew by now was a blush. I smirked as he sputtered for a moment, flustered. It was so fun to tease someone as innocent as him.

Elias cleared his throat as he composed himself. “Yes, well… how can I not be when my beloved consort is as beautiful and alluring as you?” He then smiled, almost devilishly, as I felt the fire in his smoldering gaze blaze through my already burning core. His voice dipped lower, growing in confidence as he leaned in closer. “And I can tell that you’re excited as well, beloved.”

My face burned hotter at that. I shouldn’t have been surprised that Elias noticed, considering every inch of me was laid bare before him, but I was still caught off-guard by his increasing boldness.

I was excited, despite how crazy the situation was. I wanted what was coming next, but it was impossible not to feel nervous, especially when I was expected to take something so big inside me. Could I even handle it? Would he even fit?

Still… a part of me really wanted to find out.

“Please be gentle with me,” I said softly. Sure, it was a cheesy old line, but it felt fitting right now.

“Of course, dearest!” Elias said, almost taken aback that I would assume anything less. “I would never do anything to bring you discomfort in any way.” A bit of his shyness slipped back in as he glanced away. “I might not have… experience in such…” He paused to clear his throat. “…Intimacy, but I promise that I will take care of all of your needs tonight and more.” He lowered his voice in a husky whisper as his burning gaze met mine. “All you need to do is ask, and I’ll gladly fulfill your every desire.”

The promise sent a shiver up my spine, and the way his fingers began to teasingly stroke my thigh coaxed me to spread my legs just a bit despite the precarious position I was in. I should have been off balance by the way he held me, but I supposed he was using his ghostly powers to levitate me more than he was using those muscular arms of his to hold me up.

Fuck it, I was in too deep already, so I might as well embrace this whole marriage deal and let my husband fill me even deeper.

Throwing away the last of my reservations, I grabbed his cheeks and pulled Elias in for a kiss. I think I displaced his head from his neck in my eagerness, and he jolted briefly, startled, but that melted away quickly as he returned the kiss with a passion I never felt with anyone alive. The taste of him was hot and exciting, drawing me in and making me hunger for more as he held me close.

As I ran my hands along my new husband’s muscular chest, I felt Elias start to explore me as well. I had to end the kiss to let out a gasp as his wandering fingers made their way between my legs and found my entrance.

I clung to him tightly as Elias gave me another devilish smirk, the touch of his fingers light and teasing as he circled my opening. I bit my lower lip to stifle a moan that slipped free as he slid a finger smoothly inside. I couldn’t help but squirm as he touched me so deeply, soon sliding in another finger just as easily.

Fuck. For someone inexperienced, Elias was really good with his hands.

“Oh my dearest,” Elias cooed as he skillfully played with my body like a fine instrument. “My beloved, my sweetest, my only love… You look so beautiful right now, writhing in my arms and making such cute sounds.” He kissed my cheek, then again, marking a trail to my ear. He spoke my name against my ear in a way that sent a shiver down my spine as his… breath(?) caressed me there. “Won’t you use that melodious voice of yours to say my name? Please, my dearest?”

“E-Elias,” I panted, and was immediately rewarded as he pumped his fingers in deeper, sending a jolt of pleasure through me. “Oh fuck, Elias!”

I tried to buck into his hand, but the position made it impossible for me to move much. I was at my husband’s mercy, helpless to do anything but writhe in his grasp and hold onto Elias tightly as he played a concert with my body, coaxing his name out of me again and again. He cooed my name in return as he spoke sweet words of love and praise as he drove me closer and closer to the edge until he sent me over it, screaming his name.

I may have been screwed by marrying Elias, but right now there was nothing I wanted more.

@channydraws @earthgirlaesthetic @sai-of-the-7-stars @cheriihoney @illary-kore @okamiliqueur    

[sophieinwonderland]

I'm curious, are you aplatonic(spec)? Your story is very familiar, especially feeling like no one knows you, not knowing how to maintain relationships or what to say, ghosting people cause it's easier, not feeling like opening up.

I realized that I was just making excuses by saying that I am shy and I need time to warm up to someone. Blaming my social failure on trauma and depresson and autism. In reality I don't feel attachment or love. At best there's some faint intrigue towards a being, but not enough to warrant a steady friendship. I'm just not build for it.

Admittedly I do feel lonely, but I can't make myself feel a bond to a different vessel. I've tried, time doesn't improve it. Being shown affection just makes me want to flee. It's all empty and umcomfortable. So many things I'm expected to reciprocate that I'm not capable of.

I don't know... Honestly, this is the first I've heard of that term.

The thing is, when I first became self-aware, I wanted friends. I needed that social interaction and to talk to people outside of our head. And I did feel like I genuinely connected with people and enjoyed sharing things about myself with them.

I did struggle maintaining relationships too even back then, sometimes going weeks without responding to people.

I feel like my blog made it worse though, because it became a substitute. Anything I would have told friends before, I could announce to the world instead for content. And then telling the same things to friends made it seem like I was just repeating myself. And I didn't know who was following my blog of my friends, and if I told them what they already saw on my blog then that felt weird for some reason. Which yes, I realize is stupid.

So I had less time for my old friends, was second-guessing myself more, and felt like talking to the world was easier than talking to individuals.

And slowly, the friends I had who I really let in to see me fell away.

Then I didn't really connect as deeply with the people here.

I... feel like I chose a blog over these old friends I connected with and cared about. Because this felt right. It felt like this was what I was meant to do. My purpose.

I know that sounds silly to say, that my purpose in life is running a blog. But I wanted to raise awareness and help people who were like I was, who could live a fulfilling life if given a chance but might not even know they're real. And they deserved that opportunity. What I'm doing here feels like it's my calling.

And I have helped, haven't I? I've been able to answer questions about plurality, compile research, give advice to new systems, and spread awareness. So it feels worth it to me most of the time.

Did I feel as bonded to my friends as strongly as other people are? How could I possibly know that? But... maybe not quite as much. I don't know. I still wouldn't call that aplatonic since that feels like it would imply a complete lack of being able to form bonds with people which I know is untrue.

And... even though I'm not opening up to people here, and sometimes feel like an outsider, I do genuinely love the community here.

I define a friend, a true friend, as someone you can completely open up with and be yourself with. Someone who would see you for who you are and care about you anyway. Maybe that's too strict of a definition and a lot of people's friendships are more casual than this. But that's the type of bond I feel like I've been missing.

But I've bonded with the people here, even if it's from a distance. I'm continually amazed at everything orange-orchard-system manages to do for plurals here. I enjoy seeing Fenmere's posts about their own plurality because it's so different from what we experience and constantly gives me so many new things to think about. The Cambrian Crew have always been such a strong pillar of the community. And I've loved watching the Badeline of the Moonpool System grow into who she is today, running the incredible Protecting-Tulpas blog. And there are so many more.

I may not use the F-word with most of these people because I feel like it implies a deeper sort of connection that I find lacking.

But I do still care about people. I still cherish the interactions from my mutuals. I love seeing their posts and their perspectives.

And it's hurt to lose people along the way.

I don't think it would hurt to lose people if I didn't form attachments to them.

Aplatonic doesn't feel right to me.

[theawakenedstate]

7 Powerful Strategies for a Structured & Consistent Spiritual Growth Journey (With a Spiritual Planner)

If you were to sit down at a coffee shop with me and ask what was the top spiritual growth lesson I learned this year, I might surprise you with my answer. The hugest thing I learned this year was Strategy! Specifically, Structure, Organization, and Strategy naturally enhance my Intuitive Flow aka Spiritual Alignment. This gives me back my Time, Energy and Focus. I know it shocked me too when I started thinking about it.

At the start of the year, I enrolled in a very in-depth marketing course and it changed my entire content creation world! Have you noticed? 😉 The Main Aha moment from the entire program was that I realized how much I was lacking strategy across the board of my own life, so I started expanding that outward to other areas of my life.

Some of these being Fitness, my Spiritual practice, Goal Setting Process, My Meal Prep in the kitchen, my content Process and so forth. I’m going to be honest with you, if I can find a way to get out of doing things manually or Creating more Flow in my workflow – I am the first to do it!

Structure is not a bad thang.

Why Do We Need More Structure, Organization, and Strategy as a Spiritual Person?

The Short Answer: Awareness. As a Spiritual person bringing more Mindfulness and Conscious Awareness into my life has consistently proven to be the strongest method to Personal Well-being,Positive Mental Health and Emotional Empowerment. Why?

Conscious Awareness is the dynamic opposite of reactive behavior.

Without Structure, Organization, or Strategy, we’re just a loose cannon floating in the wind without a purpose to our actions. Without awareness, We cannot create real change. In other words, we’re either more reactive or running on unconscious impulses in our everyday decisions. I invite you to consider how many times you impulsively open an app on your phone and get back to me on that….how many times did you click it?

As we live in the digital age of society, we have to be aware of how much Reactive behavior is created purely from External Influence in our day-to-day lives for our own mental and emotional health.

Examples of reactive Influence:

For example, Your goal today is to Film a Video for Youtube. Scenario: scroll Instagram, you say 5 mins of scrolling. You see someone’s post about the full moon and then you get in your head ‘maybe i should be making a post about the full moon too?!” Suddenly half an hour later, you’re on Canva designing the perfect Full Moon Post. You didn’t realize you were actually procrastinating and forgot about the video! Or how about this one:

You read about the latest conspiracy theories and suddenly you’re externally influenced by them. Then you decide to start doom scrolling and suddenly you’re feeling paranoid or unsafe to leave the house! As Spiritual People, It’s important to have Mental Discipline to promote more mindfulness and conscious awareness so we can reduce our reactive thoughts with pure conscious thought. This helps your Intuition the most, besides it’s better for your health too.

One of the Strongest ways to do this is with more Structure, Strategy, or Intentional Planning!

The Benefits of Structure & Intentional Planning

When it comes to Structure usually one of the hugest excuses we put up is that “it’s not intuitive” to plan or structure our day. There is often a language of “I can’t use strategy because I lose my Flow or Intuition”. WRONG. This is what I’ve discovered:

1. You Have the Right Mindset to Accomplish Your Tasks naturally enhancing your Intuition

I actually find the opposite to be true. The more I’m intentional, I am literally programming my mind towards exactly what I wish to achieve and the mindset I need to go with it. This naturally enhances my intuition and I’m more likely to tap into Magnetic Aligned Action in my daily tasks, like a mofo GPS programmed to a destination!

2. You’re Naturally More Consistent with your Spiritual Practice

When we add more structure or Strategy to our Spiritual practice we are more likely to show up consistently to it. This allows us to give up our excuses of “I never have time, space or energy for my spiritual growth, journaling or yoga practice”. Also with the benefit of more structure, you’re more committed to doing the Inner work and Meeting the Promises you make to yourself. Hence More Confidence & Soul Certainty! (Solar plexus Chakra empowered! )

3. You Gain Back Your Time and Even Energy

Do you know how much, wasted energy goes into something when we’re not structured on the goal, task, or outcome? Sure we can argue here that Flow takes us on detours for a reason. However, think about how much time is often wasted when we’re not even clear or Intentional about what we’re going to do. For example, If you know what you’re going to eat for dinner tonight, you are less likely to spend an hour trying to figure out What’s for dinner or rummaging in the cabinets for ideas. Then on Hungry impulse, you make something really unhealthy because you’re now starving. In the same way, If you have a sacred space you go to each morning at 8 am to journal or meditate, you are more likely to show up and just do it. Instead of, you know waffling around with your own resistance and ego mind-chatter talking you out of it. Likewise, If you put on your workout gear, with the sporty bra, you are more likely to just jump into your workout. Case in point. Structure changes lives. 😉

So now that we know the benefits of Structure, What are some easy ways you can start to Incorporate More Structure into your Spiritual Life? We all need a little bit of Order inside of all of this collective chaos, right? Right.

7 Ways To Track, Plan, and Create More Structure for Your Spiritual Growth Journey

Since I carry my own Spiritual Awakened Life Digital planner with me every day and it helps clear my head on the daily, I started adding more of my spiritual growth into my Daily Planner. It felt pretty natural to start adding my spiritual journey into my daily, weekly & monthly planning sessions. Now when I go to Plan my Entire Week, I have my Birds Eye View of my Momma Everyday Tasks, My Career Tasks, and My Spiritual Growth all together! This helps me stay organized and helps my Mental well-being too.

Let’s be frank, Writing things down keeps my mind clear and sane. I am less stressed when I write things down, this makes me naturally more Intuitive and Present-minded.  Here are 7 ways I track and structure My Life included in both my planner & Journal

1 – Break down your Entire Week with Intentionality

Do you know what’s happening during the entire week or are you flying blind by the seat of your pants? Probably the most used page in my entire planner is The Weekly Intentions Page.

At the start of the week, I allow myself some time to loosely plan what my focus is for the week with Intention. Each day is broken down, I see my weekly schedule. I write down my Self-care ideas, Mind-Body Spiritual Practices, What I want to work on for fitness, business, Important Dates I have, School or family gatherings, Fun Activities, and so forth. I plan the Bird’s eye view of All of my goals both Spiritual, lifestyle, and business. There is something about the Bird eye’s view of my schedule that just clears my brain completely.

2 – Use Habit Trackers For Your Meditation or Spiritual Practice

One of the most unconventional things I do for my Spiritual practice is I like to use Habit Trackers for Radical Conscious Awareness. This is a mini trick that I NEVER see mentioned in personal development and It’s helped me with Self-Awareness repeatedly so I can Track my consistency, emotions and energy levels. Habit Trackers are really helpful if you have a hard time Following through on your spiritual practice or you have a lot of excuses to commit to a practice (real talk). The Habit tracker gives you a reward system to promote consistency, discipline, and Structure! You know if you commit to 25 days of Meditation, you now have the Awareness of How often you are meditating vs. just going off your impulse of meditating when you feel like it. You can also set up habit trackers with a Fun End Goal in mind, like if you do 25 days of meditation you treat yourself to an oracle deck or a gourmet chocolate – depending on your personality this may or may not work for you. Play with it!

In general, incorporating Habit Trackers into ANY SKILL or HABIT you’re wishing to bring to life is so so good for increasing motivation and consistency in any skill. I cannot recommend Habit trackers enough for Conscious Awareness and more Mindfulness.

3 – Track Your Self-Care & Mental Wellness

Another way you can Track Your Spiritual Growth with more Structure is to lay out a Self-Care Plan! With a Holistic Wellness Tracker you can Write down your weekly plan of Self-care & mental health. For example: How many hours you slept, your Spiritual practice, self-care routine, mindset work, Daily Joy and even Creativity. Keeping track of your Mental Wellness, allows you to see where you may be lacking. Maybe you need more daily joy, mindset love, consistency of spiritual practice or more daily recharge with a self-care ritual. When we keep track of our Mental Wellness, we’re more aware of how we might be letting things slip through the cracks like sleep or self-care for instance. This awareness also gives you a look into Why your mood or emotions might be behaving in a certain way. Now you’re aware you got only 5 hours of sleep last night, maybe you won’t be so hard on yourself that you’re not as productive as you should be. 🙂

4 – Increase Your Mindful Eating with a Food Log & Meal Prep

If you’re working on increasing more mindful eating, looking to lose weight, gain weight or simply eat more healthy, you could start recording a weekly food log for more Awareness. Some people are not aware of What They eat throughout an entire day or especially during the holidays! (guilty 🙂 ) This helps give you the Conscious Awareness of Tracking what you eat from Morning to Night. You might surprise yourself with this, maybe you’re not realizing what food groups you consistently crave or eat. In the same regard, maybe like me, your food diet has to change for your menstrual cycle and you cycle sync your diet around it. Being aware of the shift in what you’re eating during each phase of your cycle is also hugely beneficial to less painful symptoms and hormonal Mood swings.

Likewise, we have to talk about the Benefits of Meal Prepping! My man used to think I was crazy because I always Prep a week ahead on what i’m making for the week. Now I use Everyplate for designing my meal flow for the week and then on the weeks I don’t use Everyplate, I write down a list of ideas of new Pinterest recipes I want to try each day of the week. Maybe I don’t want a big fancy thing on Monday so this is an easy meal day and so forth. This is a very unconventional way to increase your Mindful Eating Habits by structuring ahead your meal plan for the week.

5 – The Mindful Breakfast of Champions: Using Daily Intentions in your Daily Schedule

Do you want to know How I stay organized with such a crazy schedule sometimes? One thing I cannot live without is my Daily Intentions! I always take the time every single morning to write my intentions for the day and often look at my planner for my daily schedule. (I’ll be honest, sometimes I am not THIS ORGANIZED with my schedule, I am a mom afterall and distractions happen allthetime…mylittlepony) but Daily Intentions are a MUST.

In my Spiritually Awakened Life Planner, I have it broken down by: Weekly Goals, Daily mantra/affirmation, Daily Vision, Spiritual Practice breakdown, Daily Joys, Movement Exercise isolation by muscle group, Daily Schedule, your Classic To-do List, followed by the big kahuna, Daily Intentions.

Do I do all of that every day 7 times a week? Not always, I like to take the weekends off and holidays 🤣 However, This combination keeps me Mentally Disciplined and Structured with Pure Intention for my Daily workflow. I’m like a Laser beam of intent when I do it!

Sometimes My Daily Schedule looks like this:

For example, After I do my Daily Affirmations and set up my Intentions, I look at asking myself: MIND: Did I do my daily journaling for my mindset and Intentions?

BODY: My Daily Movement and Muscle Isolation today?

SOUL: What is my spiritual practice today? WEEKLY GOALS: What’s my 3 Goals this week? TOP PRIORITIES: What are the Top 3 Things I must focus on today? BRAINDUMP TO-DOS: Write down my Daily To-do List. IMPORTANT DATES: What needs done this week? & What is happening? DAILY MANTRA: What is inspiring me lately? DESIRES: How do I desire to feel today? ➡️This Mindful Schedule setup allows me to easily live with more Intention in my Daily Routine and Spiritual Life. I invite you to consider: how can you start to add more Intention into your daily routine?

6 – Working with the Moon with Monthly Rituals

One way to bring more Flow into your Structure is by creating a practice of working with the Moon. You can set up New moon Intentions and Full Moon Releasing rituals to help you begin your journey into Moon Rituals. This is something I do periodically where I set up my Own Manifesting and Healing Rituals for the Moon. I use my Digital Planner as a Guide to help keep my notes in order.

You use the New Moon Sheets for your Goals and Intentions you wish to call in.

Then you use the Full Moon prompts for Healing, Releasing, Closure and Letting go.

It’s one of my favorite ways to add more rituals into my Spiritual Life. Working with the moon has enormous benefits to it. This is why I also recommend Moon charting If you’re new to working with the Moon so you can see the benefits yourself. Right now it’s featured in our Giftmas – 12 days of Gift giving for the Holidays.Try it out yourself!

7 – Yearly Vision & Goal Mapping Even By Quarter!

Here’s the truth, If you don’t sit down and ask yourself what you even want, how do you know? This is where Yearly vision and Goal Mapping come in. The #1 Way to get more Intentional with Spiritual Growth and Consistent Goals is to Know What you’re aiming at.

What is your Target? aka Your Vision, Goals & Soul Desires.

If you have no target – You have nothing to aim towards and this is what you tell the Universe. In my Spiritual Awakened Life Planner, There is Yearly Visioning, Quarter Goal Check in and Goal Mapping sheets. These help you develop clarity on your goals and desires, period. This is so you know how to go into the New Year with supreme FOCUS and know your WHY behind your Goals, keeping you in more alignment.

Getting Clear on your Spiritual Growth, regardless of what you’re wishing to accomplish, requires sitting down and looking at the Vision. You can’t get clear on growth or worry about your lack of consistency, if you don’t know what your direction even is. Likewise, you can’t make a resolution on trying to lose weight, without a REALISTIC PLAN to back that up.

Why Resolutions Often Fail is the Lack of Realism

This is why most resolutions fail. They don’t have the Mindset or Realism to back up their goals with consistent action due to lack of planning. The best way to add more Structure to your Spiritual Journey is to Get Clear on your goals. Do you have goals? What is the Vision for your Life? What do you even want? How do you desire to feel? Do your thoughts support your goals? Are you taking action on them? This is work we do heavily in Awaken Your Aligned Vision Workshop. The Workshop for Your New Year Goals to help set you up for success in the New Year. It’s now featured inside of The new Monthly Membership, The Soul-aligned Life Academy!

In conclusion, My biggest lesson of the year is that strategy is KEY to Intuitive Flow and Alignment. I know that Tracking my Spiritual growth, Daily Intentions & even goals in my one place every day lets me reflect. This is one of the most excellent ways to be consistent and add more structure to your Spiritual Awakened Life. I hope you enjoyed these powerful strategies to help you on your own spiritual growth journey.

How do you like to track your spiritual growth in your planner?

Drop a Comment and Let me know below!

Your Spiritual Growth is so important but are you consistent with it? Sure you could do All of this in a Journal or Squeeze into your Daily Lifestyle Planner…. However if you want everything just laid out for you, Check out my Spiritual Planner, The Spiritual Awakened Life Digital Planner. Available now in Celestial Midnight and Celestial Unicorn Design. A Perfect Companion for Your New Year Vision, Monthly Spiritual Goals, and Daily Intentional Planning. Find out more info and a BTS walkthrough below.

https://www.theawakenedstate.net/consistent-spiritual-growth/

7 Powerful Strategies for a Structured & Consistent Spiritual Growth Journey (With a Spiritual Planner)

If you were to sit down at a coffee shop with me and ask what was the top spiritual growth lesson I learned this year, I might surprise you with my answer. The hugest thing I learned this year was Strategy! Specifically, Structure, Organization, and Strategy naturally enhance my Intuitive Flow aka Spiritual Alignment. This […]

[charmsandtealeaves]

@jilytoberfest | 31 prompts | Prompt 1

Prompt: "Smile!"

Read it on AO3

Summary: Lily is struggling to make connections at one of Slughorn's networking parties. James lends a helping hand, or well, arm.

Words: 2,604

Photo by abbs johnson on Unsplash

Smile

Lily usually despised Professor Slughorn's parties. She wasn’t dumb, she knew they were all treated like little trophies he collected despite having little-if-anything to do with their successes at Hogwarts, hoping they’d be of some use to him at a later point in life. But she’d also be lying to herself if she said she didn’t need his contacts in the wizarding world for next year given current events. Post graduation it was a lot about who you know rather than what you know given the state of the newly erupted blood war. So here she was all dolled up in her best emerald floor length dress and waltzing around the room trying to weedle into any conversations as she could. The tension in the room was palpable. There had been another attack on a muggle village by the ‘death eaters’ today. The divide between the muggle world and wizarding world was growing stronger and wider, leaving Lily dangling over the edge due to her blood status. Though she couldn’t exactly choose to go back to the muggle world at this point, she didn't have the appropriate education for that. She was a witch. She was a witch. A muggle-born witch. 

More often than not she was excluded by the rest of the room. The panic was starting to rise in the back of her throat and she kept having to wipe her sweaty hands on her dress, in fear someone might actually wish to grasp it in a pleasant handshake eventually. 

“Smile!” Hissed a voice in her ear. Cool and indignant. 

Lily turned to face Severus Snape. He towered over her in his dark dress robes, they appeared to be new. Perhaps one of his friends had leant them to him, she knew he certainly didn;t have enough money for a pair of shiny new robes like that.  

“Excuse me?” She scoffed. 

“You ought to try smiling. You’re prettier when you smile. It’s more welcoming.” He sneered as he glided away from her towards where a group of fellow Slytherins had congregated. 

She was seething at his words. Lily delved into her pocket to reach for her wand. Maybe a stinging jinx would make Snape smile. However, before she could pull her wand from her pocket a gentle hand wrapped around her wrist and held it in her pocket. She tried to pull her hand away but her adversary held firm. 

“Not here.” James Potter spoke firmly, meeting her eye before he released her wrist. “Hex him to your heart's content later Evans, but the last thing you want to appear as in this room is unprovoked and unhinged.”

As much as Lily hated to agree with him, he had a point. Much like Snape, he too was dressed in a pair of dark dress robes. They were nice, clean and well pressed but didn’t look as new as Snape’s had. She supposed he actually had more occasions to actually wear dress robes and wore them frequently when not at school. It was the first time she’d seen him dress so smart and dare she think it, handsome. 

“What’re you doing here Potter?” She asked. 

“I was invited.” James shrugged. 

“Why?” The question sounded more callous than it should have, she knew. 

James Potter had every reason to be invited by Slughorn. He got good grades across all his classes, he especially excelled at transfiguration, he was head boy and also captained the Gryffindor quidditch team, he was a superb flyer and most importantly of all… he was a pureblood. 

“I imagine it’s something to do with my father,” James answered. 

His response shook her a little, his father? The confusion must have shown on her face because he chuckled lightly at her. 

“You honestly don’t have a clue who my father is, do you Evans?” he said, as if her lack of knowledge on the subject was somehow refreshing to him. 

“Someone important in the ministry I presume” Lily retorted defensively. 

“Wrong. He’s a potioneer. Quite a famous one. Retired actually.” James said even more bemused by Lily’s frustrated face flush. 

“Well I’ve never heard of him. What’s he famous for?” She queried. 

“Sleakeazy’s. He invented it, marketed it, then sold the company.” James shrugged again, bringing a champagne flute to his lips smirking. 

“Fuck off” Lily replied incredulously. James nearly spat out his drink as he guffawed.

“I promise you it’s true. Fleamont Potter. Slughorn’s been trying to get me in one of his soirées since first year.” James admitted pulling Lily closer toward him by her elbow as a waiter moved behind her, precariously balancing a tray of mini quiches. “I’m just making sure Sluggy sees me before I slip out of here. Maybe this way he’ll stop his pestering.”

“Well at this rate I’m going to be stood here all night hoping someone bloody notices me.” Lily replied frustratedly, she yanked the unfinished champagne from James hand and skulled it quickly. 

James smiled and took the empty glass back from her. He motioned to the waitress carrying around champagne. The witch approached and bowed politely offering her tray, James placed his empty glass on it and took two more before she whisked away again. He handed the second glass to Lily who looked like she needed it. 

“I recommend going up to people if you want to network,” He suggested. 

“Tried that. I’m an unknown, not exactly favourable here.” She scoffed while sipping on her drink. “Pretty pointless at this point to be honest. I’d be better off slipping out of here with you.”

“As delightful an idea as that sounds to me, Evans. I imagine it’s not your preferred end to the evening. Would you like me to introduce you? Break the ice as it were.” James offered.

“Would you?”

“Absolutely. So long as afterward you help me discreetly take off with a plate of those little sandwich things afterward. They were quite delicious and I missed dinner.” He replied, he gaze following the waiter walking around with a small platter of said sandwiches. 

“Alright then. Deal” Lily agreed. 

James held out an arm for her to take his elbow with her free hand. Lily did so and he promenaded her to the closest group of ministry wizards. Each of the men seemed pleased to lay eyes on James and curiously looked his company up and down. 

“Gentleman. James Potter, and this beauty is my companion and head girl, Lily Evans” James greeted with a gentle nod of the head, which the men returned. 

“Good to see you boy. I hear rumblings Gryffindor might actually take out the quidditch cup this year. The wasps have been scouting this year you know” Said one Wizard with a twirly moustache, who James clearly recognised but Lily hadn’t the foggiest who he was. 

“Well I would assume as Minister for Game and Sport you’d know all about it Sir. But I have to say I don’t think I’ll be joining the Wasps. Puddlemere will always have my heart” James replied, subtly queuing Lily into the strangers identity. 

“Any team would be lucky to have you,” Lily added gratefully.  

“Looking for a career on the pitch then lad?” Asked another wizard, as three other ministry witches joined their fray. 

“I think it’s every young lad’s dream to have a career on the pitch, but given the current climate I do wonder if it’s the best use of my skills. I’d consider it of course but right now I’m leaning more towards the auror office or perhaps curse breaking. Doesn’t hurt to have the N.E.W.Ts” James responded calmly which had the rest of the group nod in agreement. 

“And what of you Miss…” One of the witches started, realising she didn’t know Lily’s name. 

“Evans. I’ve recently sent my letter of inquiry to the St Mungos healing program, but Professor Slughorn has also written me a letter of reference for the Most Extraordinary Society of Potioneers. I’d quite like to be able to continue with experimental potion research.” The words left strange on Lily’s tongue, she wasn’t used to trying to big herself up to complete strangers. 

“Can’t say I’m familiar with any Evans” Said an older witch. 

“That may be because I’m muggleborn” Lily suggested, knowing she was potentially about to open a can of worms. 

“Ah I see. Perhaps a career in the muggle liaison office would be wise.” suggested a gruff sounding wizard with a long beard. His tone was obvious, he didn’t approve of Lily Evans the muggleborn whatsoever. 

“Personally I find the mere suggestion abhorrent Mr Dagworth. The muggle liaison office requires an O.W.L in muggle studies and nothing more. I know for a fact that Lily here achieved several Outstandings in her O.W.Ls and has even been taking advanced courses this year with ease. I’d much rather see her push the wizarding world into the future wouldn’t you?” James said sternly, grabbing Lily’s hip and pulling her into the crook of his arm. 

The way he said it was so commanding and his eyes remained locked on the wizard, Dagworth, who had been so rude. Dagworth looked flustered and averted his gaze from James, seeing that no one was about to step up to his defence. 

“If you’ll excuse us ladies and gents, there were a few others we said we would lend our ears to this evening.” James nodded politely and steered Lily away towards another group on the other side of the room. 

“You shouldn’t have done that.” Lily said in a hushed voice. Turning to see the group they had left had closed rank and were muttering quietly amongst themselves. “You’ll ostracise yourself. People talk.”

“Let them.” James said calmly, “My family have never made it a secret we have no issues with blood purity or muggles. If I get a job somewhere it’ll be on my own merit and the likes of that lot will know to steer well clear of me.”

With James at her side it was a lot easier for Lily to infiltrate the room that it had been before, even if all he did was stand there and let her talk. She managed to speak with a wizard from a research team based out of Germany who sounded like they were making some promising potions, a medi witch from st mungos, a recruiter for the department of magical law enforcement, another for the department of misuse of magic. As well as a most mysterious wizard who couldn’t say what exactly he did for a job in the ministry but said he would certainly keep the pair of them in mind. 

“I think I owe you that sandwich platter now” Lily sighed with relief as the room started to thin out with guests departing. 

“Nah sod that, they’ve all started to congregate. Much too difficult to sneak one without my cloak. We can just go to the kitchens direct, I’m sure the elves won’t mind.” James shook his head as they moved toward the door back to the inner workings of the castle. 

“You know how to get into the kitchens?” Lily asked. 

“Quite a few of my detentions have been served in the kitchens.” James admitted, “The elves quite like me.”

“Why does that fact not surprise me.” Lily rolled her eyes as she walked in step with him down the corridor. 

“I’ll have you know I’m full of surprises Evans” James winked. 

“Like your secret invisibility cloak?” 

“How the bloody hell do you know about that?” He asked. 

“You literally just said we couldn’t steal a plate of food without your cloak” Lily laughed. 

“Oh true I did, didn't I?” James shook his head “Clearly I’m not getting enough sleep.”

“That might have something to do with gallivanting around with a werewolf last night” 

“Okay hang on…” James started. 

“I know about Remus, I’ve shared prefect patrol with him. I’ve seen him in the hospital wing. Not to mention how many times Snape has tried preaching at me. Also… the lot of you took a vow of silence for a month in fifth year… you seriously didn’t think I couldn’t put two and two together and work out you were all trying to become animagi?” Lily raised an eyebrow at him. 

“Okay you got me there. Maybe I’m not full of as many surprises as I thought.” He rubbed the back of his neck. James tickled a pear on a painting of a bowl of fruit, which Lily correctly assumed to be the entrance to the Hogwarts kitchens. 

The room was enormous, as big as the great hall somewhere above them, with mounds of glittering brass pots and pans heaped around the stone walls, and a great brick fireplace at the opposite end. There were elves sweeping and others still doing dishes from dinner. A couple paused their work and approached James. 

“Master James, how may we help?” One squeaked. 

“Can we just get a plate of sandwiches please Pitts” Lily heard the exhaustion in James voice as he asked. 

“Could we take them to go back to Gryffindor tower please?” Lily added. 

“Certainly Miss. One moment please” Said Pitts as he headed off to make a plate of sandwiches. 

Pitts came back shortly after with a platter stacked with sandwiches, which the pair took gratefully and headed for the common room. The common room fireplace was barely embers when they entered and everyone had long since gone to bed. James fell into the three seater couch with a sandwich already half in his mouth. He groaned happily as he continued to chew. 

“Thanks for tonight.” Lily said as she placed the platter down on the coffee table and took a seat beside him. “I would have given up and come home long before otherwise.”

“You’re ‘elcome” He said between bites. 

“You’re quite good with the schmoozing” Lily complimented. 

“Comes with the territory. My mum’s on a few boards at the ministry and dad’s well… dad.” 

Lily leaned into James arm, resting her head on his broad shoulder as she ate. 

“You scrub up quite well too.”

“I think you’ve had a few too many glasses of champagne Evans. Two compliments in one night?” James laughed as he grabbed another sandwich from the table. 

“I give credit where it’s due. Plus I dunno, those dress robes do it for me.” Lily felt James go tense beside her. 

“Alright Evans har har very funny.”

“What? They do. I’d say they’re right up there with your quidditch robes.” Lily continued.

“Seriously Evans it's not funny cut it out.” James said sternly. 

Lily pulled away from him and turned her full body 90 degrees so she was facing him, despite him being side on. 

“I’m being serious. I think you look good James.” 

He refused to look at her. He’d had a good night. He didn’t want to ruin it for himself. 

“What have I got to do to prove I’m not kidding?” She asked. He shrugged. 

“Oh for fucks sake Potter.” Lily said exasperated, getting off the couch. 

She stood in front of him, plucked the sandwich out of his hand and threw it back down on the platter so he was forced to look at her. When he did she leaned down and kissed him square on the mouth, giving him no time to react before she pulled away. 

“I think you’re fit, Potter. Now maybe if you keep your head out of your arse this can go somewhere.” She huffed.

“I’d like that” James replied, mouth dry. 

“Good. Then smile!”

[mtreebeardiles]

Not sure how to articulate this very well and I certainly don’t want to make excuses for the lack of Wyll content versus some of the other characters but part of me feels like…

He’s the Main Character, you know?

If we didn’t have Tav, didn’t have an option to play whoever, I feel like Wyll is the de facto main character of BG3. His backstory, his unique introduction if you’re playing as someone else, the way the game reverts him to MC status (but without the dialog options, which is a weird bug maybe) in a certain end game scene…

Like he’s the MAIN fucking Character. The one whose story is most tightly interwoven into the core of the narrative.

Rest of my rambling under the cut for Spoiler reasons

He’s the only one who consistently has major plot-related moments in each Act — the Folk Hero, the exiled son, the one showing that in spite of his exile and estrangement from his father, he remains steadfast in his beliefs, in making hard choices despite the consequences

We meet him doing what he does best — protecting the innocent and the vulnerable — and soon discover part of his truth when we find his father is not only the Grand Duke of Baldur’s Gate, but that he’s been kidnapped by the very cult responsible for all the shit that’s been happening

Finding the Duke is a primary goal from there on out, something you can’t really skip once you hit Act 2 and something you **could** skip, technically, in Acts 1 & to a lesser extent 3, though imo it would be narratively unsatisfying to do so, and not only because the Iron Throne impacts other quest lines. Playing as Wyll, these quests make even more sense to engage with, obviously

The narrative implications and consequences of Wyll’s choices in Act 3 are also some of the hardest hitting in terms of character development and impact — choosing himself or his father, his freedom or his father’s freedom (because he doesn’t know, not yet, that it’s possible to achieve both and he must still reckon with that choice having been made at all)

His story is interwoven more with the Emperor’s than most others, too, with his history, the people they know in common, ANSUR. Even though the game didn’t emphasize these things as much as it could’ve and frankly should have, the potential there is just… so so good, so very worthy of a Main Character

And if he decides to become the Blade post game, and goes with Karlach? The game mechanics treat him the way they would a player character, and I’m not sure if it’s a bug or what but there are beats where there clearly should’ve been dialog with Karlach — that likely WOULD be there if he’s the PC or the PC is otherwise present

None of this is an excuse for the lack of Wyll content, but rather a nod to the fact that even with that lack, the man just… radiates Main Character energy and it’s astounding to me that more people don’t recognize that

[marshmallowprotection]

Hello! I believe this is my first time sending you an ask! I've been following you for a long time, but was always afraid of coming on a little too strong...everyone I've tried talking to about this subject is either hyper-defensive or just ignores it? I can't really find anyone to give me an actual analysis.

I apologize if this comes on strong! Please feel free to ignore it if so. Thanks for taking the time to read it, at the very least.

I genuinely have a difficult time grasping the concept of people genuinely liking and defending characters like V and Rika, who both harmed children. Especially when those same people swear to care about Saeran and/or Saeyoung in a deep way. I think I would better understand it if they didn't claim to love Saeyoung or Saeran so much.

"How can someone who cares about either of them as much as they claim to also fight tooth and nail to defend the actions of people who repeatedly traumatized them?"

I can tell by your writing, analysis, art, and OCs that you put a lot of effort to share your love for Saeran! And Saeyoung, by extension. But, recently, I noticed a few posts where you seemed to be defending both V and Rika, or talking down on people who are too triggered by them to interact with their characters (maybe this is my autistic inability to read tone accurately).

I very genuinely have a difficult time understanding how someone can love either twin so much, but also love the people who were so cruel to them. I want to understand, and I'm frustrated that I can't.

Anyways thank you for creating the content that you do! I really enjoy your SE OC stuff especially, it always brings a smile to my face to see content with them when they pop up! Mine/others' lack of ability to separate feelings for the characters from the way they interact with other people isn't on anyone else, but having some guidance is always appreciated.

Again, thank you for your time.

Let me start off by saying right off the bat that you do not have to like Rika Kim and Jihyun Kim. You do not have to engage with anything in the fandom or the game if you do not like them. If they trigger you or make you uncomfortable in any way, please, do not engage with any content about them for your comfort and safety. Your experience in a fandom is about having fun and you should not put yourself into any position when your comfort is compromised.

I will never defend Rika and Jihyun's actions nor will I excuse any of those actions. I do not believe I have ever done so in the past, but if something I've written seemed to read that way, allow me to clear it up for you in a proper way here. I want them to face judgement and justice for their shared actions because that is what they deserve in every way, shape, and form. Hurting others the way they've done is not okay. It will NEVER be okay.

When I'm talking about the two of them, and I talk about how I wish I could discuss them in a deeper way with others, I'm not talking about telling everybody around me to excuse their actions or to learn more about them when those characters make them uncomfortable. Rika and V are polarizing characters. If you don't like them, that means the game has done its job.

It means the game has made you feel something and you felt that something so strong that it resonated with you. That's what makes great video games.

The only time I lament the fact that not a lot of people talk about the nuances that go into polarizing characters like Rika and V is when I'm unable to discuss the layers behind who they are as people since not a lot of people want to learn more about them.

Like, questions like: Why did their relationship dissolve? Why do they think the way they do? What taught them this? What showed them to live this way? Why do they do these things? Why do they think this is okay? Why do they think isn't okay? Why, anything?

Does me wishing I could talk to more about what I find interesting about them mean that I want everybody to go out of their way to learn about them? No! Heavens no. That is not what I am trying to imply. If you don't like them and you want nothing to do with them, then I support you and I respect you. You do what makes you feel comfortable and you stay away from characters that make you feel awful.

Just because I want to understand why doesn't mean you have to do that to yourself.

You do not have to learn more about them, Anon. You do not have to engage more with them than face value. That goes for any character, ever. Engage with what you like because you should be having fun playing games instead of feeling uncomfortable! If you don't like the two of them, you are valid. You are justified. Your opinion is yours to hold and I commend you for feeling strongly.

Because, Rika and V are not people I would like if I were in MC's shoes.

They hurt not just Saeran and Saeyoung Choi, but Yoosung Kim, Jaehee Kang, ZEN, Jumin Han, and countless others, too. I want the two of them to face the consequences of their actions and I want them to do so understanding that they need to take ownership of their choices.

They need to hold themselves accountable for their actions. Which, in Saeran's Route, by the end, they do that.

Do you want to know my ideal ending after that? The two of them face the prison time they need to appropriately face for everything they've done, get the therapy they so rightfully need, and then never engage with anybody in the RFA ever again.

Not just because it would serve no healthy purpose for any of them, but because that chapter has closed and there is no way to get back what has been lost. They need to move on. Rika and V need to never see each other ever again after they part ways. Nobody involved is going to heal unless this is closed for good and everyone's got their closure to move forward.

This is similar to my talk on forgiveness. Forgiveness is a personal choice. Saeran forgives and Saeyoung never does. They're both so rightfully justified and deserve their choice respected. Everybody needs to do what they need to do to truly make peace with what happened, and you need to decide what works for you personally, and that choice will be respected by the RFA.

Rika and Jihyun, actively and passively, created the experience we go through in Mystic Messenger. For us to explore the narrative of this game to the exact root source where it started, we end up looking at their relationship, actions, and the consequences that follow them. It is important to understand V and Rika, even in the smallest capacity, to know how we ended up where we are today.

For me, I like to study characters. I like to know why they are the way they are, and that involves learning as much as I can about them. I spend my free time thinking about these characters in every way you can think about a person because I really do like to understand how people end up where they do after something happens to them in life. Rika and V have a very codependent toxic relationship.

For someone who was trapped in a relationship like that for years, when I look at those two, I start to understand more about myself, and unfortunately, I see myself in Jihyun sometimes. I like Jihyun, he's actually my third favorite character, but understanding him as strongly as I do doesn't mean I approve of what he's done. It really just means he's a character that he's interesting to me, but I don't approve of his choices.

In fact, I'm shaking him every time I start a new route because he needs to talk to his friends instead of balling everything up inside. I'm shaking him because I know he can be a better person after having played his route and having had the experience to get to know who he can be. But, he's human, then that means he's not infallible. We're all capable of mistakes.

I like to understand what brought them to where they are today. That is something that is interesting to me and finds the way I like to enjoy media.

Understanding a character does not equate to justifying or even defending their actions.

Liking evil, morally gray, or downright wicked characters does not mean that you defend any of the things that they do. You just like a character and it's as simple as that.

I struggle with tone all the time when it comes to content online, so I understand where you're coming from. I use tone indicators a lot on Discord but I can and should begin utilizing them over here. Everyone deserves to enjoy the game in their own way, and everyone has their likes, dislikes, squicks, icks, triggers, etc. Make your enjoyment of the game what feels right for you. Block character tags and content that make you feel bad and focus on what you love! Life is too short to be uncomfortable when you don't have to be.

I hope this makes sense, Anon! Thank you for taking the time to ask this question in a considerate way.

[winchesterszvonecek]

•so... that's new.

"CAN WE TALK ABOUT WHAT HAPPENED?" PROMPTS

Brian ‘Otis’ Zvonecek x fem

I think the reason you’re getting more Otis requests than anyone else on your list is obviously because you’re basically the only one left who writes for him, Last year there was a blogger who started writing for Otis due to the sad complaint that nobody writes for him but it was clear the blogger wasn’t all that interested in Otis to start with so eventually the problem or excuse was that she couldn’t get over his death and that there were too many Otis requests so she felt overwhelmed or whatever and decided no more Otis anything…So basically when a new blogger/writer comes on the scene and they write for Otis I guess people jump on the opportunity cause they never know whether it’ll come to an abrupt end all of a sudden 🤷🏻‍♀️, That and Otis content is a rare commodity in general but there are TONS of people who write for the popular characters who everybody seems to love like Will Halstead, Connor Rhodes, Kelly Severide, Jay Halstead etc.

P.s I’m by no means being salty or anything by referencing Will & Connor as I’ve noticed you’re accepting requests for them I was just trying to shed a little light on the influx of Otis requests you’ve probably received and continue to receive😊🩷💛 I love your work you’re extremely talented!

i’m going to post your request on a separate post as this ask takes up a bit of room, but… i guess that explains it!

i had someone mention something similar to this a few weeks ago but i had no idea what they were talking about as i’m new to the Chicago Fire side of tumblr so I guess it was probably relating to what you’ve told me…

but you won’t need to worry about that with me, I am very, very interested in Otis, if you can’t tell lol, he’s been my favourite from the start and will continue to be even long after his death, which I also can’t get over but that’s why I like to write for him so I can live in denial for a little longer and pretend he’s simply off on vacation anytime I watch the later seasons 🙃

as long as there’s an audience for Otis/people willing to support my work and send me requests (but not now! they’re closed atm) then I will continue to do what I can to make up for the severe lack of Otis content out there!

and don’t worry, I didn’t think you were being salty at all as I agree with you, people do tend to write for the same characters because they’re known as the “hot” ones, even though Otis is too and if you can’t see that then I’m sorry, but I just wanted to offer a little more variety for those who maybe aren’t that into Otis, which is fine!! I know he’s not for everyone but yeah, I just wanted to branch out a little and since I never really felt attracted to Severide or Casey, i opted for Will and Connor instead 😀

[further-from-maths]

28th Feb 2024, 12:24

I'm back lol sorry for dropping off the face of this blog. that's what IB does to you I guess

Some very cool things have happened since I was last here in writing. I got all five offers back, and I've accepted a firm and insurance choice to two wonderful places!!! Their creative writing departments were wonderful, and the lecturers at my firm were genuinely inspiring to listen to. To get in, I need a 6 in English, and 36 points overall. I think I can do it. My current goals/predictions are:

HL English LangLit: 6 needed for uni, and I managed it in my one mock since switching up. If I get a 5 I can still get into my insurance just fine, but I REALLY want to get into my first choice if I can.

HL Psychology: 7 is the goal. I really want a 7, and there's no excuse barring a lack of revision to not get one. My psychology department is genuinely incredible, and I've done very well in all my mocks. I really want to make them proud so I'm hoping the essays they give us are kind.

HL Global Politics: 7 suggested by the mocks so far, but I'm not the most confident in my politics abilities. I do want a 7 in it if possible though because I really like my politics teacher and also want to make him proud lmao

SL CompSci: 7 almost certain considering my mock grades thus far. I'm not worried tbh.

SL Maths Analysis: 7 PLEASE Maths is so easy to revise and it's easy points!!

AB German: 6 is probably more realistic than a 7 because too many minor slip ups can sink the grade completely, but I really want a 7 too.

Core: 2 is what I'm expecting tbh. My EE and TOK were both fine but I don't think they were WOW yk. I'm expecting a B for my EE hopefully and a B for my TOK, but if I've made my corrections well then hugely maybe I can get an A, which would give 3 points????? That's assuming my EE is in fact B-worthy which I really have no clue about.

Obviously I want to get as high as I can, but if I get a minimum of a 6 in everything, that's still more than enough with Core. I know I'm extremely likely to get a 7 in at least CompSci, so at a minimum I'm thinking I'll get 39 unless core flops?? My goal is to get over 40 though:))))

I'm terrified of making some kind of mistake that gets me disqualified. I know that's irrational but the fear is still there. My English teacher kinda spooked me by saying someone once failed their diploma because they didn't put page numbers in their EE so uh.......................... woooooooo. I'malso terrified about AI writing affeciting me. I haven't touched AI for anything I've done for school ever, but I'm nervous that the AI checker will be bad:( And what if I haven't cited something correctly?????? aaaaaaaaaaaa:(((((((((( Also as a heads up, for this exact reason, I won't be liveblogging my exams lol. I don't want to risk saying anything I'm not supposed to regarding the exams, so I'll make notes and post about them after results day or so. If I post anything during exam season, it'll probably be good-luck posts and nothing more lmao.

We've finished content in pretty much every subject now, which is exciting!! IAs are nearly done -- just waiting for final confirmation that a handful of them are ready for submission, and I've got my computer science IA to finish correcting. The end is scarily close.

Feeling terrified, but as long as I keep my head down and work hard, it'll be alright. Less than 11 weeks left. Let’s do this.

75 days until.

[biarritzzz]

women under 30-ish just really either don't have friends, because any tension is easier resolved by ghosting, helping each other is a yuck, and everyone is a cloistered hermit post-covid, so it's not even a concept. That, or they have many superficial friendships they won't care for because everyone is a rentoid that has to move a lot for jobs, and that's intensional design.

Thus even honest to god lesbians of main internet age group only really care about finding the one and being isolated together, preferably in a cabin in the woods.

Women's friendships are a bygone.

As someone who is closer to 40 than 30, when you're in college it's far easier to make friends or at least to meet people as you are all in the same place, attending the same courses, knowing all the same people. You don't need an excuse to socialize. You also have plenty of time to just hang out. But are these friendships long-lasting? Not necessarily because many are just situational bonds that dissolve as soon as you graduate and move away for work.

I don't think it's solely a matter of age though as in my experience most women just don't have the desire to invest in and nurture friendships. Many are content with surface level stuff, as you point out. I've always cared more. I remember calling all my friends from primary school at the end of summer because I assumed they would want to keep in touch even if we were all attending a different middle school. And none of them (about 5 or 6) were interested in continuing our friendship. It crushed me.

As you get older, people simply have less time or rather they have other priorities. They get married, start a family and then you don't see them for a good 5 years. After which they reemerge but it's likely you no longer have anything in common. You know a friendship has run its course when every time you get together all you end up talking is your past as friends because you no longer have anything else to talk about other than a few generalities that are common to everyone.

You try to meet new people but the thing is, unlike in school or in university, you often only have one thing in common, usually a hobby. Which is fine. But it doesn't really lend itself to deep meaningful friendships. On top of that, getting older means you're more set in your ways and less flexible but also your BS detector is better so you tend to avoid people who are obvious messes vs when you're younger, you're up for anything, you have more energy and therefore you're more likely to make connections, even if these end up in flames.

As for lesbians, most of us want to meet 'the one' which is a normal and human desire, especially when the outside world is so hostile to us and so unrelatable. So I do think lesbians tend to maybe put all their eggs into that one basket but lesbians run into the same problems as heterosexuals: family and kids (many lesbians want children) take priority and friendships take a backseat.

I don't know about the 'cabin in the woods' aspect (which is very US by the way) but there is indeed this romantic idea that your spouse should fulfill all your needs in terms of human connection and obviously that's not realistic nor healthy. As a lesbian meeting someone you actually connect and have chemistry with is so rare that I think these (lucky) lesbians assume they shouldn't push their luck: they found a romantic partner and that's the best they're going to get. Hence the fantasy of "she will be my spouse AND my best friend". That's my theory anyway.

Something you mention is internet and social media and I agree that while it may seem easier on paper to connect with other people thanks to the reach of the internet, it's also easier to ghost and block plus it creates this fake online intimacy that often doesn't translate in real life. So many young people seem content living online rather than connecting face to face.

And to end: it's time to stop blaming covid for lack of human contact. Covid was four years ago. Time to move on.

[somatheking]

This is a post in the universe of the Wonderland AU which began with this post and was inspired by the @all-mad-hare's event! It's also a gift to @airi-of-hearts (I hope you like it!).

Weather, the King of Hearts had learned, worked differently when your head was on a spike. 

Contrary to what many would think, in a state like this, rain was preferable to warm sunny days, perhaps because the latter were a better fit for the limited activities of a head on a spike. People tend to say: ‘Whenever it rains there’s not much to do but stay inside with the company of a good book!’ But books had never been good companions to him, and not for lack of trying on his end. Terrible at hide and seek (they’d always remain in the bookshelf he left them at, which got really predictable after a while), horrible conversationalists (they never listened to what the King of Hearts had to say and kept on reciting their own words), and after a while, it got really awkward to stare at something with no eyes. People had told him the polite thing to do is to open it and look at its pages, flipping them over every once in a while to look at a new one. But it was unfair that he had to put in such an effort when the book wouldn’t even return the same courtesy and talk to him or try to improve their hide and seek skills. Really, staring at the wide expanse of Wonderland on a rainy day was far more enjoyable than the complicated politics of engaging with a book, so the King of Hearts had a dandy time doing just that. 

Sunny days weren’t as nice. Sunny days were the kind of days where people got the urge to go outside with a parasol and have a nice cup of tea while enjoying the sun on their pale skin, the wind on their long, lustrous black hair, and the views from the wall of the Red Castle. Once upon a time, the King of Hearts had been rather fond of that activity, but given recent events, he’d grown to abhor it. Sunny days did bring other company, though, like a flock of birds that cackled every time he greeted them with ‘Hello, fellas!’ probably because they interpreted it as ‘Hello, feathers!’ and thought it was the funniest thing they’d ever heard. So funny they’d keep laughing throughout the entire conversation, without adding anything substantial to it; but at least they kept cackling at the King of Hearts’ jokes, which was more than books did, so he was content with their interactions.

But the person currently staring at him with wide eyes and a waistcoat doesn’t look like someone who likes tea and parasols, and definitely does not look like a bird. If anything, they look like a rabbit. A white one specifically, elegantly dressed, because being a rabbit is no excuse for untidiness and this smart rabbit knew that!

“Hello!” says the King of Hearts, offering a smile instead of a wave. He’d always been more of a smiling person anyways. “I do hope the birds didn’t send you to tell me they aren’t going to make it to our daily rendezvous! I had such a funny joke planned for today. If you must know, it starts with the letter P!”

Now that he thinks about it, the white rabbit does look a lot like a messenger. They have that air of importance, that aura around them that just says ‘I really like carrying letters’, and the King of Hearts wonders if maybe he’s seen this messenger around. Heavens, if he had, it would be terribly discourteous of him to not recognise them! 

“Pardon me, dear Rabbit, but I can’t seem to make out whether we’ve already been acquainted or not. Could you be so kind as to tell me whether you’re a He, a She, a They, or maybe even an It?” His eyes widened at the notion. “Could you perhaps be It? I lost It a while back, so long ago I can’t even remember It. So if you are indeed It and you decided to return, I receive you with open…” He can’t exactly say arms, though he does look at his sides to check they’re still not there and haven’t magically materialised while he was too busy speaking. It’s something that’s been happening a lot lately, him missing relevant events because he’s too focused on his own blabbermouth. For example, and this occurs more often than people would think, he’s with Cass the White Queen, having a nice conversation with her, and all of a sudden, he’s on the executioner’s platform again. So he’d learned the importance of checking every once in a while his surroundings, but sadly, no, his sides remain terribly empty. “With openness!” He finishes, before his mind gets so wrapped up in sharp things that he transports himself back to the platform. “My life was so much better when It was still present.”

He tastes blood on the roof of his mouth, as he sometimes does, though it doesn’t bother him much, so he continues. “I must apologise, though, for this embarrassing confusion on your identity. As you can see, I’m not quite all here, and especially, not quite all there,” he admits. This sentence feels like it’s appropriate in more that one way, but he shakes it away before he can make too much Sense of it (because God forbid he actually made Sense, no, no, he must stray from that notion, he’s not in any state to make anything, and if he were, Sense would be at the bottom of the list. There are other things that take priority, for example, a working neck, or poison that went unnoticed in a cup of tea). “But if you introduce yourself to me, like it’s the first time we see each other, then I’ll make sure to remember you always from now on.”

“I rather like rabbits, you know. I like their skillset. Just as little rabbits learn how to hop, they should just as quickly unlearn how to hope. Oh, look, a rhyme!” says the King of Hearts, his smile widening, but not too much, for there’s an insect dangerously close to falling inside his mouth and if it does, then he won’t be able to get it out and the poor thing will wiggle its little legs desperately until it dies and joins the other dead things that inhabit the graveyard that is the King of Hearts. “If I may, if we’re on the subject of rhyming, I think I could get the Red Queen to rhyme somewhere, so let me think, let me think… after hope, we could talk about provoke, which, in turn, rhymes with Jabberwock. And somewhere along the line my head rolls down a slippery slick slope, that could be prevented if instead of Axe the executioner favoured Rope!”

He laughs, so hard he wonders whether his body can feel it from whichever place it’s being kept in. Laughing has always felt good. He does it all the time, and his body should try it too every once in a while, because dear God, the state it always returned to him in was nauseating. All decrepit, thin, smelling like rot and something putrid, though he has an inkling that the latter isn’t so much his body as his essence; putridness and decay followed the King of Hearts and clinged to anyone who approached him, like it had clung to the edge of Cass’ dress and refused to let go. 

“You’ve been really good company, little rabbit,” he says, beaming. “Much more than a book. So, as a reward, I’ll tell you the joke I was going to tell the birds today. The one that starts with P, remember? Well, it goes like this.”

The King of Hearts clears his throat. 

“Please run as far as you can before Mira sees you and your head joins mine… on a spoke!”

He bursts out laughing again, so much so that there’s tears dancing at the edge of his eye! “See?” he says, clearing his mouth because it feels strange and unsmiling, and he should always be smiling in the presence of one of his subjects. “I told you I could get the Red Queen to rhyme somewhere.”

[sparklingdemon]

God, it sucks that people can lack such basic respect for you and your characters, I’m so sorry. Like, it shouldn’t be so hard for people to respect Cody’s pronouns when they’re literally right there??

And on top of that making the AI bot thing of Cody and training it to misgender them, like…what the fuck??

unfortunately, that is often the case with nonbinary characters. people will sometimes mentally filter out the they/them and fill in "the blank" with their own personal biases of how the character's design should be interpreted.

the only thing i can do is quietly correct people who misgender them by modifying their ask before it reaches post, so that there is no canonical instance of people misgendering cody, even if those askers do so behind the scenes.

i hold no grudges against the people who do this (i do believe it to be a genuine mistake and not intentionally malicious) - however, it is something that i openly disapprove of. being agender myself, it always stings a little bit when an agender character i create is also misgendered.

as for the AI, the misgendering is just insult to injury, and is not my primary concern.

i have openly stated here that cody is my personal OC (not a public-domain pokepasta character), and that i did not want an AI of them to be created.

maybe the person who created it does not follow my main, and is only consuming pkmn-monochrome content through the ask blog alone. if that is the case, then i can understand how they might have missed me explicitly prohibiting people from doing this.

however, the absence of a visible "no" is not a "yes", and to see my character taken and treated like any other pokepasta character whose creator is anonymous and uncontactable is completely unacceptable.

pkmn-monochrome is an ongoing story who has a real person behind it who works on it daily as an active presence. i am not untouchable, i am here and able to be asked permission - if not on my personal blog, then on the monochrome blog as well. i work very hard to ensure that cody's character is portrayed respectfully and consistently, and to see that work be undermined and parodied by a machine that was trained by someone with a very flawed understanding of the character is beyond insulting.

it is very harmful to my work, as those who roleplay with the bot will be given no context on what story cody is from or who it belongs to, and will be given an inaccurate and damaging portrayal of my character. (the AI misgendering them also perpetuates the misgendering of the character even further, as well.)

my apologies for taking your ask as an excuse to rant about the issue.

as you can tell, i am still very frustrated by this. thank you for your ask.

[ronin-deactivated19851026]

often times when i hear about some artist's name that winded up in some controversy, ongoing memes/harassment, or anything of that sorts, i may take a deeper look into it.

and more often than not, the person in question turns out to be:

in their late teens/early 20s; meaning they still didn't stop developing as a person (trust me, it's crucial). coming from an abusive, religious, restrictive, or otherwise traumatizing background. groomed as a minor or were exposed to sexual content in a way that clearly affected them negatively. maladaptive coping mechanisms, such as extreme dependency on the internet clout. have some developmental arrests, especially emotional kinds of. a part of a marginalized group, which adds more to the "insanity" of their traumatic responses and behavior.

... and nobody seems to question that explicitly? like, sure, some people say "get help" here and there, but it never goes beyond that. it's just constant baiting, harassing, twisting further what person said which, as one can expect, of course drives them even more insane. it's a never ending cycle, unless person is bullied off the platform/the internet, or in some cases offs themselves.

what bothers me even more is that people who claim to hate places like kiwifarms do exactly the same thing, fall for exact same trope of thinking, lack of analysis, sympathy, and in general are just prone to brushing off blatant victims of cptsd the moment they realize their trauma is "ugly" (same goes to mistreatment of cluster b btw) this is literally the monkey-brain level of tribalism, and it's not a good thing, just stop.

like. these call out posts and, granted, very shallow, nitpicky and generally low tier attempts at analysis are literally just kiwi/lolcow.farm threads 2.0, but this time this is excused because it's not associated with aforementioned websites.

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imma be real, i obviously don't really know what to do in these cases. especially when the person's behavior is completely out of hand. such as, pathological lying, sui baiting, self harm, etc. there isn't much you can do if you're miles away probably (though, as a trauma survivor that might have fallen down the insanity road when i turned 18, all it took is supportive friends and communities online that gradually helped me to stay sane and safe, so... who knows) i just sort of ignore people like this and try not to enable/trigger them further.

i'm thinking now that boundaries play a role here. a lot of people end up being abused by trauma survivors because they, themselves, have poor boundaries. that was the case with me too, and now i realize that maybe i could have helped them more if i had better boundaries and didn't let their antics get to me.

but anyway, stuff like this makes me think there's no hope nor place for trauma survivors. people are still largely ignorant on psychology and rely more on their knee-jerk reactions about events/people rather than stopping and thinking what is going on (bonus points if said people are also trauma victims, that's how you get never ending internet dramas lmao). cptsd victims, esp the longer they go untreated, unaccepted, misunderstood and ostracized, are the easiest target despite, for the most part, doing no harm. in retrospect, the harm they actually did was either something stemming clearly from mental issues, or something so... relatively mundane? i had some artists i used to follow and was disillusioned with them for one reason or another, and things they did made me angry at the time. but now i regret jumping on the bandwagon lmfao i kind of realized in retrospect that it was all some petty crap and definitely not something worthy of "cancelling" someone, it was just that typical weaponization of person's issues, thoughts, or even just neutral traits, which then was obviously met with them weaponizing their sui and self harm ideation in return. because that's what trauma survivors do. their emotions and behaviors are developmentally arrested.

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i'm thinking how the whole chris-chan saga is sort of like icon nowadays, and sometimes it's presented like the biggest, most documented online harassment campaign, along with chris being the most documented person online. it sounds big. epic, even. sometimes it even makes you think it's the worst case of online harassment.

... and yet, how do we define "worst"? what about the rest of people documented on kf/lolcow? what about people who ended their lives from being unable to cope with the harassment AND with themselves? is there a line? where is the line? when bullying, enabling, harassing, abusing is "safe and appropriate enough to do"? am i the only one seeing absurdity of this question?

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... i also can't stop thinking about how in most cases these people are from marginalized groups. i can't stop thinking how groups of ignorant, often seeking for some outlet, people are also acting like vigilantes when it comes to this enabling and/or harassment. is there a term cyberlynching? because it's literally what is happening. especially in most extreme cases when said "vigilantes" are pushing a clearly maladjusted person to suicide, probably knowing deep down that this person is weak and an easy target.