#so many people think that fire is Murphy's element

[doortotomorrow]

characters in the spotlight » john murphy : star sign

[christinaroseandrews]

Looking for a Romance this Valentine’s Day?

So, every publication and blogger is putting out a Valentine’s Day romance list, and we are nothing if not followers. We’ve assembled a large list (33 Books) of a mix of traditionally and indie published books. All of the books on this list are ones we’ve read and feel comfortable recommending. And they all fit the definition of romance - a story where the relationship is central to the overall plot and features a happy for now or happily every after ending.

We’re going to break this down into several categories because not everyone reads Regency romances (but we are going to start there).

Regency Romance

These are books set between 1795-1837. While the Regency itself was only from 1811-1820 most people use these dates including Wikipedia. This was honestly one of the hardest for us to narrow down, mostly because it’s the dominant genre in traditionally published romance -- even Contemporary doesn’t hold a candle to Regency right now.

Sweet Disorder - Rose Lerner - M/F Romance (Steamy) - Election hijinks ensue when the local election hinges on who the widowed wife of a newspaper printer marries. Other Notes: Plus-Sized Heroine, Family Drama, Disabled Characters, Everyday People Falling in Love, Marginalized Author (Jewish).

The Baroness Affair - Jean Wilde - M/M/F Romance (Steamy) - A desperate noblewoman enlists the help of a male courtesan to help her get pregnant... no it’s not what you think. Other Notes: Equal Triad Polyamory, Period Appropriate Homophobia, LBGT Romance, Family Drama.

How To Start a Scandal - Madeline Martin - M/F Romance (Steamy) - A wallflower and secret society reporter reconnects with the Earl Next Door who’s recently returned from the war. Other Notes: Plus-Sized Heroine, Family Drama, Positive Mental Illness Portrayal, Cute Plot Animals.

Project Duchess - Sabrina Jeffries - M/F Romance (Steamy) - A duke returns to his family after the mysterious death of his stepfather, yet another duke, only to be enchanted by a woman who has a connection to the last person to see his stepfather alive. Other Notes: Older Heroine (the whole series features these), Romantic Suspense Series, family drama. I’m really enjoying the whole series and it’s worth a read.

The Rakess - Scarlett Peckham - M/F Romance (Steamy) - This is a love it or hate it kind of book that flips so many of the conventional romance tropes on its ear. It features a hard-drinking, hard-smoking, highly sexual woman who authors progressive literature and causes a scandal just by living her life meeting up with a mild-mannered reputation conscious Scottish Architect with two small children. Even the cover flips the script on the classic clinch cover. I loved it. A lot people didn’t. Other notes: Period appropriate sexism/hypocrisy/etc., CW: alcoholism, neighbors to lovers, adorable plot moppets.

Paranormal Romance

These are romances that feature a fantastical element. This can be anything from vampires to shifters to time travel. These also will often be series which may or may not continue with the same relationship throughout several books.

Hot Ghost - Annika Martin - M/F Romance (Steamy) - A waitress finds love with the ghost who haunts the pier near her family’s restaurant. Other Notes: Major Character Death (It’s a Ghost Romance...), Everyday People Falling in Love, Novella.

Accepting Fate - Deanna Chase - M/F Romance (Steamy) - Fresh from a bad break up, a woman meets her soulmate at an art gallery opening. Together they have to work through their trauma and find out if they can be happy together. Other Notes: Childhood trauma, Fire Fighter Romance, Soulmates, Artists.

Gretel - Niamh Murphy - F/F Romance (Steamy) - A retelling of the fairy tale Hansel and Gretel with a very interesting twist. Other Notes: Age-Gap Romance, Novella.

One Shade of Grey - Monica Corwin - M/F Romance (Steamy) - Dorian Grey, yes that one, has a bit of a problem. He keeps seeing a woman who he thinks is the reincarnation of his lost love. But is she really? Or is he going insane? Other Notes: Positive Portrayal of Mental Illness, Classical Story Retelling, Billionaire Romance, Immortality

Tangled in Time - Barbara Longley - M/F Romance (Steamy) - Cursed to see spirits, Regan is approached by the spirit of a cursed Irish warrior. Now they must work together to lift his curse and fall in love along the way. Other Notes: Fae Romance, Time Travel Romance, Ghost Romance.

Hunger Pangs: True Love Bites - Joy Demorra - M/M/F Romance (Steamy or Fluffy) - A vampire, a werewolf, and a magic user walk into a plot to end the world. Of course they have to fall in love along the way. Other Notes: Vampire Romance, Werewolf Romance, Magic User Romance, LBGT Fantasy Romance, Bisexual Romance, Postive Mental Illness representation, Marginalized Author (Disabled, Queer, Neurodivergent).

Erotic Romance

These are books where the sex is as much a part of the romance as the rest of the story. The plots here tend to be thinner, but they’re still present and important. This is not smut for smut’s sake. The relationship is important too. All of these are going to rate high on the steam.

After Hours - Lynda Aicher - M/F Romance - An executive assistant accidentally observes an after hours orgy in one of the boardrooms. Rather than be repulsed, she’s aroused. And up for more. Other Notes: Workplace Romance, Voyeurism, Exhibitionism, Mild BDSM, Boss/Subordinate Relationship.

Loving Maddie from A to Z - Kelly Jamison - M/M/F Romance - An outwardly happy couple looks to add something to their relationship by inviting their friend into their home and bed. Other Notes: Polyamory, BDSM, Big City Romance.

Ever After - Eden French - M/M/F Romance - An erotic modern retelling of the Cinderella fairy tale featuring billionaires, celebrities, and lots of hot sex. Other Notes: Interracial Romance, Polyamory, Billionaire Romance, CW: Child Abuse.

Test Drive - N.S. Johnson - M/F Romance - A so-called good girl finds that she’s really not when she falls for the leader of a street racing crew. Other Notes: Polyamory, CW: Infidelity, Interracial Romance, Reverse Harem, Recreational Drug Use, Author of Color.

Other Historical Romance

These are romances set outside of the Regency but not during contemporary periods. A lot of old school romances tend to be this because medieval was big then. But it also includes everything up to 1990 too... Yeah... I know... I feel old.

Let It Shine - Alyssa Cole - M/F Romance (Steamy) - Set during the civil rights movement, this story follows two young people struggling to find their voice and love amidst the turmoil of the 1960s. Other Notes: Interracial Romance, Period Appropriate Racism, Period Appropriate Anti-Semitism, Author of Color, Sports Romance, Novella.

In Pursuit Of... - Courtney Milan - M/M Romance (Steamy) - Set immediately after the American War for Independence it features a British soldier falling in love with a Black man who fought for the American side. Other Notes: Interracial Romance, Romantic Comedy, period appropriate racism, author of color, Novella.

Bringing Down the Duke - Evie Dunmore - M/F Romance (Steamy) - A rare female scholar tries to keep her scholarship going while also crusading for the rights of women in Victorian England. Other Notes: Alpha Hero, Clueless Heroine.

Contemporary Romance

These romances are set in the last 25 years and run the gamut of tropes.

Get a Life, Chloe Brown - Talia Hibbert - M/F Romance (Steamy) - Sick of living her life wrapped in tissue paper, Chloe Brown sets off to live a little. And to do that, she needs the help of her building’s manager. Other Notes: Plus-Sized Heroine, Interracial Romance, Disabled Characters, Positive Portrayal of Mental Illness, Marginalized Author (Black). As a note the sequel Take a Hint, Dani Brown is just as good and features a Bisexual Woman of Color.

Beg, Borrow, or Steal - Susie Tate - M/F Romance (Fluffy) - A medical student has to juggle the needs of being a single mother, a student, and paying the bills. And if that means she’s got to take off her clothes to do that, that’s what she’s going to do. Too bad she keeps falling asleep in class. Other Notes: No Sex (No really), But also Super sex positive, Student/Teacher Relationship, Adorable Plot Moppet.

Soft Hands - Ariel Bishop - M/M Romance (Steamy) - A professional Hockey Player ends up falling for the team trainer and massage therapist. Other Notes: Bisexual Rep, Sports Romance, Interracial Romance.

The Year We Fell Down - Sarina Bowen - M/F Romance (Steamy) - Two people who’ve suffered from accidents which have left them disabled find each other at a Harvard Expy. While one of the characters only has a temporary disability (broken leg) it still fucking counts. Other Notes: New Adult Romance, Disabled characters, Sports Romance, College Romance.

Small Town Romance

A subgenre of Contemporary Romance, these are books set in a small town and often the stakes tend to be pretty low. They can run the range of no-sex to lots of steam. They are also often VERY WHITE. While many are set in America, they can also be set elsewhere with Australia and the British Isles being the most common other settings.

Falling for Her Brother’s Best Friend - Noelle Adams - M/F Romance (Steamy) - Who doesn’t love a small town romance featuring characters that used to be childhood friends becoming more? Other Notes: New Adult Romance.

The Last One - Tawdra Kandle - M/F Romance (Steamy) - Meghan, an art student, and Sam, a farmer, and how they meet in small-town Georgia when Meghan comes to teach art over the summer to the kids in town…and ends up staying with Sam and his family. Other Notes: Alpha Male Hero.

If Wishes Were Horses - Caitlyn Lynch - M/F Romance (Steamy) - When an Aussie woman inherits partial ownership in a horse ranch in Ireland, sparks fly. Other Notes: Novella, Irish Romance.

Old School Romance

These are romances that were written before the rise of indie publishing where white men had the power and it shows. These are what people point to when they reduce romance novels to just “bodice rippers” but even then they weren’t just that.  BTW none of these books feature Fabio so suck it!

Skye O’Malley - Bertrice Small - M/F Romance (Steamy) - Daughter of a small Irish lord, this book follows Skye through her life and romances across England, Ireland, and even Algeria. It’s wild and all over the place and is not your typical romance novel. It ends on a HEA but there is a JOURNEY. But gods it’s one of my old-school faves. Other Notes: Major Character Death. Non-Con, Pirates, Interracial Romance, Historical Domain Characters, This is not your typical romance. I like the whole series... but that’s a me thing.

The Traveling Matchmaker Series - Marion Chesney/M.C Beaton - M/F Romance (Fluffy) - A housekeeper inherits a large sum of money and decides to use it to travel about England. Along the way, she makes matches for the other passengers of the stagecoach she’s traveling on while getting into all sorts of adventures. This series is pure fluff and I love it. Other Notes: Period appropriate xenophobia, Age Gap Romance.

Remembrance - Jude Deveraux - M/F Romance (Steamy) - A romance novelist discovers that the reason she hasn’t found love is because of an issue with her past life. So she decides to do something about it... only to find it’s just the very tip of the story. Other Notes: Time Travel Romance, Past Lives, Meta... so very meta.

Desire in Disguise - Rebecca Brandewyne - M/F Romance (Steamy) - Look this is set during the French Revolution and features duelling (quite literally) pirates. This is a wild ride and it’s so old school it hurts. Other Notes: Alpha hero, mistaken identity, enemies to lovers, spies, pirates, But oh so many problematic tropes. This looks to be out of print... so check your local library.

Gentle Warrior - Julie Garwood - M/F Romance (Steamy) - Set right after the Norman Invasion of England, this features a Norman Lord who was granted an Anglo-Saxon wife and all of the drama that comes with. Note... this is the first Romance Novel I ever read.. My mother bought it for me when it was newish -- in 1987. Other Notes: CW: Rape, Arranged Marriage, Non-conventionally Attractive Hero.

Books that check all of the boxes of Romance but aren’t Labeled as Romance because Sexism.

Romance isn’t about sex. There’s lots of books with explicit sex in them that aren’t Romance and several with a strong romantic relationship that drives the plot which ends happily and satisfying. But sexism is a thing and so here we are.

The Princess Bride - William Goldman - M/F Romance (Fluffy) - You’ve probably seen the movie. The book is also fun. And since the romance is central to the plot AND the ending is a happy one (especially in the movie) it qualifies.

The Hunger Games Trilogy - Suzanne Collins - M/F Romance (Fluffy) - Look who would have thought that in a book about kids killing each other and the violence of war that Romance would play that big of a role? But it does. And it is. And it’s important.

Katherine - Anya Seton - M/F Romance (Fluffy) - This could feasibly go into Old School Romance, but apparently the publishers have decided to downplay the actual romance and try to sell this as literature. It follows the real-life Romance between Katherine Swineford and the Duke of Lancaster. 

Did we leave off any of your favorites? It’s probably because we haven’t read them! We always like recs, especially featuring marginalized authors or main characters with marginalized identities.

If you like this kind of thing, consider leaving us a tip in our Ko-Fi!

[tipsycad147]

Beginner Witch Tips That You Won't Want to Miss

By Penelope Hughes

What are the Different Types of Witches and Which One Are You

There are many forms of witchcraft, and each one suits a different kind of person. Knowing which type of witch you are is essential. You will learn quicker and have a higher success rate if you lean towards your strengths and passion.

Hereditary Witchcraft

This type of witchcraft is passed down from generation to generation. When you were young, your family would have already trained you in their path. You would have learned family recipes with magickal ingredients and have a family grimoire. You will most likely have access to a Book of Shadows, which will give you an extensive advantage in your studies compared to other witches.

Green Witchcraft

A practitioner of green witchcraft works primarily with nature as their teacher and instrument. You will live in alignment with Earth and understand that everything living has a spirit. Your main tools will be plants and herbs. If you have a green thumb and enjoy working with herbs and plants, green witchcraft may be your calling.

The Faery Faith

This type of witchcraft works closely with the faeries (faery or fey). These are magickal beings such as undines, nymphs, pixies, or sylphs believed to live in the astral realm. The astral realm is parallel to ours. Practitioners of this craft will learn to work with the thirteen lunar months of the Celtic Tree calendar, and they will access different energies that each of the thirteen months holds. Green witches who work with the fey will often overlap their craft.

WICCA

WICCA is a religion that is neo-pagan and nature-based. Their beliefs are similar to the ancient Celts' religious beliefs. Wiccans do not have one single holy book, but they do follow two laws. The first law is the Rule of Three, which means "three times what thou givest returns to thee." The other law is the Wiccan Rede, which means "an ye harm none, do what ye will." There are many different sects of Wicca, and they all have separate traditions.

Kitchen Witchcraft

This type of witchcraft incorporates cooking into their spellcraft. The process of cooking and eating becomes a form of ritual. Consuming the food infused with magick kitchen witches release the energies from their food into themselves and the Universe. Kitchen Witchcraft is a calling for those who are skilled at cooking and enjoy working with food.

Chaos Magick

This type of witchcraft prefers to work with sigils and charged symbols. Chaos witches will learn how to enter a state of unconscious intention called a "gnostic state." They use breathing techniques, muscle relaxation, or intense emotions to enter a gnostic state to think and enact magick unknowingly.

Eclectic Witchcraft

This type of witchcraft is a combination of different practices that is unique to the witch. An Eclectic witch creates their path by drawing on their heritage, passions, and various types of magick. This type of witchcraft does not follow one single track.

Books for the Beginner Witch

One of the first things I will recommend to a new witch who wants to get started is to read lots of books. Knowledge is power, and you will not gain that knowledge by sitting idle and waiting for others to teach you.

I am always reading books and learning new things. I usually purchase my books, but you do not have to. If your short on cash or don't want to buy your books, check what resources your local library has. You might be surprised by the amount of information they have available.

The Book of Shadows: by Brittany Nightshade. This book is excellent for the new witch. Just understand it is not a real Book of Shadows. The book covers different types of magick and goes over how to cast simple spells. She does cover love spells in the book, and I would say love spells are very popular, but please be cautious with them and never cast a love spell with a particular person in mind.

The Green Witch: by Arin Murphy-Hiscock. I just finished this book and cannot praise it enough, especially if you are interested in Green Witchcraft. Arin does a beautiful job covering herbs, flowers, essential oils, and so much more than I expected. She has a handy index for a new witch at the back of the book that you can quickly flip to if you need information about a specific herb or plant.

The Wiccan Book of Shadows: by Ambrosia Hawthorn. If you are interested in learning about Wicca and its fundamentals and practices, I highly suggest the Wiccan Book of Shadows. Some books meant for beginner witches can be very biased or, on the other end, they do not offer much of a foundation. This book met in the middle for the perfect mix of a good and robust foundation. Another thing I love about this book is how gorgeous it is on display. When I got this book I knew at first glance it was not going to go on the bookshelf.  This is a beautiful piece of art that needs to be displayed.

The Door to Witchcraft: by Tonya Brown. This book covers the history of witchcraft through the ages and how it has evolved over time. You will learn about fundamental techniques, traditions, rituals, and ceremonies that every new witch should know. Our history is significant to know, do not forget that it was not so long ago we were burned at stake.

What The Colours Mean in Candle Magick

New witches will usually start with magick that they find most straightforward and the least complicated. Because candle magick is not as difficult or complicated as other types of magick, it makes sense that new witches would start with candle magick.

One thing you should remember when preparing to use candle magick is your candles need to be dressed. Dressing the candle is accomplished in two steps. The first step is exercising the candle of any negative energy or previous magickal energy. The second step is charging your candle. Neither step is complicated, but it will require a great deal of concentration and visualization skills.

Witchcraft Tools That You Should You Get First

The basic tools of spellcraft include the athame, wand, sword, cords, cauldron, chalice, and altar bell.

If you're a new witch with a small budget ( I know the feeling, I started in middle school), skip these tools and focus on candles, incense, oils, and herbs.

I would recommend forgoing the tools in the very beginning and encourage you to study. Join a coven, get some books from the library, join beginner witchcraft groups on Facebook (be safe when talking to people online, and meeting people from online groups could be dangerous).

The Athame: This is a ritual dagger with a double-edged blade. It will have a black or white handle that witches will paint or engrave runic names or magickal symbols on it. It is used for casting the circle, storing or directing energy during rituals, and stirring potions.

The Wand: The wand is the emblem of power, and it symbolizes the ancient element of air (some traditions believe it represents fire). Its traditional uses are to cast the circle, draw magickal symbols, invoke spirits, and stir cauldron brews. Wands are usually carved from the wood of the hazel, ask, rowan, or willow tree. Modern witches have had wands carved from crystal, ivory, and metal. I recommend sticking to wood but that's just my preference.

The Sword: If you are starting and new to witchcraft, you should not need to get this basic tool. Covens usually use it, and if you join one, they will most likely already have a sword for their rituals. The sword is used the same way as the athame, but it is considered more authoritative.

The Cord: Cords are used to store magickal energy for later use. A witch will tie nine knots into the cord to hold the magickal energy. When they are ready to release the power that has been stored, they untie the knots in the same order in which they were tied. Depending on the intent, you might untie one knot every night for nine days.

The Cauldron: The cauldron is made of iron and possesses great mystical power. It symbolizes the four ancient elements of air, fire, water, and earth. Its three legs represent the three phases of the moon (waxing, full, and waning.) Cauldrons are used for rituals, brewing potions, burning incense, and holding charcoal blocks, candles, amulets, talismans, and herbs. Be careful if you intend to buy a cauldron offline. A lot of times, they are a lot smaller than what the pictures make them look like.

The Chalice: A sacred goblet is a tool that represents the element of water. It is used for ritual mixing of salt and water, blending potions, and pouring libations (a drink poured out as an offering to a deity).

The Altar Bell: If you are interested in WICCA, they use a small bell to keep at their altar. It is rung three times to signal the start or close of a ritual. Other magick practitioners use altar bells to summon or banish spirits, dispel negative energy, and drive away mischievous fairies.

https://www.mysticalstudies.com/post/beginner-witch-tips-that-you-won-t-want-to-miss

[solesurvivorpaigeargot]

Okay but let’s talk about the opening of Fallout 4

And I’m not talking about the part where you gotta pantomime your way through a half-hour of BS at least before you’re actually allowed to step out into the world and get shite started [seriously Bethesda, if you’re gonna keep making openings like this, please include a ‘get to the point’ option and stop making modders do it for you. First time it’s interesting, second time it’s mind-numbing.] I’m talking about when you roll up on the museum and have to help out Preston and the gang-- and I’m just gonna rant for a few paragraphs here so here’s a read-more cut so I don’t clog up dashes too badly. 

Fallout 4 never gives you the chance to value human life. 

Fallout 3 had this issue as well, but it’s even more glaring in 4 because in 3 an order came down for your death. When you aren’t given a choice, what you’re doing can at least be penciled in as self-defense. 4 expects you to devalue raiders and treat them as unreasonable threats, to see them as a shooting gallery and nothing else... but there’s a serious problem with the framing.

You made me pantomime being a normal person for the first 30 min to hour of your experience, and now you’re telling me a normal person can just pick up a gun and start popping people with no moral issues. 

This is required to even get close enough to talk to Preston. He might take out all the raiders if you’re willing to wait 20 minutes, but when you put yourself into the role play head space of a character, what kind of person ducks behind the sandbags and waits for the dude with the laser to pick everyone off? And there is no force preventing you from simply running away, this is true-- but doing so simply removes your ability to interact with what is a core mechanic of the game a-la the minutemen and establishing settlements. So if you wanna keep the game experience intact, and follow along with the mission? Murder is required, without any time taken out to consider the value of human life or if that murder is justified, or if your character is capable of that kind of violence. 

To say I dislike this headspace in shooters, that whomever the denoted ‘bad’ group is are just okay to treat as squishy playthings, more so in shooters that try to integrate choice and morality, is a massive understatement. There are plenty of other things in the commonwealth that could threaten a group of settlers that aren’t people, and framing us as a normal person [PARTICULARLY IF YOU PLAY AS ‘NORA’ WHO WAS NOT A MILITARY MEMBER] who is just immediately ready for this is ASSUMPTIVE BULLSHIT. More so when you remember that if you played as ‘Nate’ this dissonance would be less-- it assumes a male audience who would choose the male protagonist, and his military service makes this opening a lot smoother. But when you don’t? It becomes batshit insane. Your average lawyer is not ready to just pick up a gun and wreck people, even when there are innocents on the line. 

So, if ya like, I’m gonna propose an ‘alternate’ idea for what this mission could have been that would have kept all the same elements. The raiders, the power armor, the deathclaw-- but not forced the player character directly into murder. 

Step 1: Finding Dogmeat. 

When we find Dogmeat, he appears to be just... wandering the gas station? And yeah, he’s in our path, but Mama Murphy appears to think that Dogmeat went and found you, so let’s take that a step further. Let’s say Dogmeat actually ran and found you-- that he spawns into the world when you get past the footbridge, and no matter where you go from there Dogmeat will find and bark at you. That no matter how you treat him, Dogmeat will try to lead you to Concord and ruin your stealth by running in circles around you and barking if you try to go the wrong way. That this pupper is trying to find someone to help his group, he found you. 

Step 2: The approach.

So say we follow Dogmeat, who leads us to where the raiders and Preston’s group are in standoff. And yeah, sure, we pass the main road where they’re all sandbagged up, but Dogmeat leads us around back to a rear entrance the raiders have not yet realized exists. Possibly a fire escape that has a ladder that could be released from above that was pulled up when Preston and co hunkered down. While, yes, the player could choose to engage the raiders at this point, deciding they’ve seen enough and take on the museum from the front? Going around, Dogmeat barking, and Mama appearing to let the ladder down because she probably knew you were coming gives you a non-violent in. Why haven’t the group left? There’s too many of them to just sneak out, Mama is old and slow, and Jun is nearly catatonic. No changes have to be made to the group to make that path out non-viable, it’s simply a way for you to get in, speak to Preston, and understand what the fuck we’re dealing with here without the one and only solution being kill everyone-- though the power armor is posited as something that might be helpful in a show of force to get the raiders to fuck the fuck off. 

Step 3: The Raiders.

Banditry is not something ‘bad people’ do. It is an act of desperation. The idea that all the raiders are just the most repugnant people on the planet, and there appears to be no fuckin’ end to them is the same flavor of bullshit that’s used in all that war on drugs propaganda 50′s politicians were so high on. The idea of ‘Oh, the raiders are just bad people, so it’s okay to shoot at them’ ignores that they are people. People with lives. People with motivations. People who had their own path that led to where they are and what they’re doing. And what motivates a person to this kind of violence?

Starvation, usually. And I’ll be the first to say I don’t make great decisions when I’m hungry, either, but let’s dig a little deeper on this. Let’s step into the role of the leader of a raider group for a few seconds, get into this head space, and think about what’s going down with Preston’s group. 

Imagine that I am a leader of a raider band. Let’s imagine that it started as me and a friend getting forced out of Diamond city, possibly given exile, because we couldn’t find work and decided to steal some food. The lack of work was no fault of our own; me and my friend may not have known the right people, or had the right skill sets, or been willing to take work that risked our lives as if we were worth nothing. Maybe we survived on good will for a while, but after so many hungry days got desperate, held up the Dugout for all the caps they had, or stole food from the general store, and tried to run with the take before we got caught. Whether we were caught, stripped of our gains, and then thrown out, or we got away-- we now have a place we can’t go anymore, and are at the mercy of the outside world. Are we bad? Are we bad because we were starving to death and desperate? Am I bad for coming up with a not great plan but at least trying to take action rather than just quietly dying in a gutter? I just wanted to eat. So now me and my friend are drifters, and we stick together because we’re all we got. And maybe we meet another drifter here, and another one there, and on some hungry night someone gets the idea that hey, if we all jump out from the side of the road and threaten a trader, maybe they’ll drop some of their stock without a fight?

We don’t want caps. We want food. We can’t spend the caps, and we don’t wanna get into a fight because none of us can get treatment-- we’re exiles and criminals. We don’t want blood, we want to eat.

So we threaten a trader, and that goes well-- we got supplies! But those supplies don’t erase our records. We still need to live, and this food is only gonna last so long. The traders know about us now, they talk-- even if we got money, who the hell would trust us? No one, that’s who. Even better, sounds like our little hold-up horned in on some other group’s territory that we didn’t even know about, and they ain’t happy with us. We all have guns, but none of us have ever killed anyone. None of us want to. We just wanted to eat.

So did the other group. They just wanted to eat, too, but they saw us horning in on their territory. Their take. Those supplies belonged to them. They have mouths to feed. More than us, probably. We stole from them, and all we wanted was to eat. 

Whatever happens next is desperate, and it’s a baptism in blood. It’s a process of alienation. While there may be a select few who are actually out of their gourd and enjoy the violence, the majority of people who engage in banditry are desperate and hungry. 

So what the hell does this have to do with the group holding up Preston’s group?

By all rights, Preston’s group does not have anything a gang of raiders wants. Even if they’re far enough along that caps have value to them again, able to do trade with their own network, injuries are expensive and often lead to permanent disability because these groups lack consistent access to medical supplies and knowledge, and fatalities means your crew is down an important and useful member. SO WHAT THE FUCK DO THEY WANT? 

In the canon encounter, what they want is nothing. They want to wipe out Preston’s group because the game said so [I think there’s a terminal entry about it later, like they’re getting paid or something, but no payment is worth getting wiped out the way they did, and you don’t run a group that big on blind arrogance alone. Gristle woulda been displaced by then. All the caps in the world aren’t worth your life; you can’t feed dead crew members, and greed is useless when you’re blacklisted from all the settlements with any sense of luxury] They exist to shoot at. But when we ascribe motivation to them, what the fuck do they want? 

The power armor. 

It’s a tool; something that would change the balance of power in the area, make other groups think twice and lower the chance of losses when trying to gain supplies. Screw wiping these morons out, there’s only five of them left-- hold them at stand-off for a day or so until someone breaks and asks to negotiate, make them drop everything they’ve got as the toll for getting out, and then the group steps in to take the prize. There’s no need for anyone to get shot, just gotta starve ‘em out a little and then let them run with their lives. 

Step 4: The Death Claw

So we have a stand-off situation that could... probably be pretty easily negotiated through without major loss of life. Your player character is a third party, after all. Opens up some non-lethal ways of doing things if you wanna convince Preston and co to give up all their stuff if it means getting out with their lives. Likewise, a high speech character could possibly go to Gristle and convince him that you’ve seen the power armor and it’s wrecked, no worth the effort he’s spending on bottling this crew up, and the men he’s probably already lost in the process. Or maybe a character with high intelligence could work with Sturges to sabotage the power armor, handing it over to the raiders knowing that in a day or two it’ll fall apart. All of these make for some interesting shades-of-gray choices...

Then the deathclaw shows up. In the middle of negotiation. Everyone gets forced up to the upper floor; no time to kill each other, there’s a giant murder machine prowling around the lobby and it is only a matter of time before it climbs up to the second floor and starts ripping out walls and doors to get at people.

This could have served to make the situation even more interesting-- if you’d gone aggro in the beginning and started killing raiders in the streets, you have less people to deal with a massive threat that could kill the fuck out of you. If you’d been in the middle of convincing the raiders to take a sabotaged set of power armor, you’d have to explain to them why the power armor isn’t gonna help you... or let Gristle take it and get murdered when it freezes up and leaves him stranded to get ripped out of the can and munched. Is that murder? How’s the player feel about that? Meanwhile, if you hadn’t killed anyone and were in the middle of negotiating a bloodless solution, you might have a chance of unifying everyone to take down the deathclaw-- possibly with a future bonus that Gristle and his crew wanna go straight and giving you the choice to set them up within your settlement system, or becoming yet another ‘civilized’ system that won’t work with them because they’re too far gone. 

...................... I may have to write another fic just to explore these ideas in a modified canon. 

[minaminokyoko]

I know I’m screaming into the void here, but

Can we talk about the lack of HarriKarri content in Peace Talks?

Spoilers for Peace Talks below. Also, a very long rant.

Disclaimer: Recently, the reading community has been having conversations about expectations related to professional authors backed by one of the Big Six or equivalent traditional publishing companies. The points I’m about to bring are not me being entitled. I understand that Jim Butcher is not obligated to give me everything I want. I will not demand that he do so. I just want to have a conversation about something I feel is oddly dissatisfying about the content in Peace Talks related to Harry and Murphy, which is my own opinion, and said opinion isn’t going to be slung at the author or anything distasteful like that.

Right, so, to give some context, I’m not a fan of Peace Talks. I read it once and then just sat on my couch for several hours after trying to figure out what to even do with myself because I waited six years for what I consider to be an underwhelming book that was mostly just set up for Battle Ground. I mention it because I admit that if we get Battle Ground in September and all the content in Harry and Murphy’s relationship that was missing in Peace Talks is in Battle Ground, fine, I’ll retract my statements. Some fans have already expressed that they can’t really review Peace Talks or give opinions on it because it feels so much like a companion piece that you can’t evaluate it until you’ve read Battle Ground, as the book seems to be nothing but the precursor to Battle Ground. It doesn’t stand on its own very well, at least not in my eyes, but let me get to the point.

The reason I’ve been feeling angry and betrayed by Peace Talks’ lack of HarriKarri content isn’t just because I’m the Queen of the Harry/Murphy trashpile. I’m not speaking strictly as a shipper this time. Y’all know me. I mean, look, I’ve written 185k words of Harry/Murphy fanfiction, most of which was written during the incredibly long wait between Skin Game and Peace Talks. Yes, I know, it’s hypocritical of me to say I’m not writing this post because I’m a big dumb shipper queen. I do mean it that I sincerely think it’s outright bizarre that we got so little insight into how these two best fire-forged friends and lovers are doing in a romantic relationship.

Let me make my case here. Okay, so the first thing is that romance is a huge element in this series. Harry’s love life is important not only to him as a character, but it actually plays directly into the plot, from Susan’s selfish stupidity to Elaine’s mistrust to Luccio’s mysterious manipulation to Lasciel’s Heel Face Turn. If someone wanted to argue the reason we didn’t see much of Harry and Murphy together as a couple is because romance isn’t the primary focus of the series, that’s not going to hold water. The connection between Harry and his paramours has always been a large element in each of these books in various ways. That’s probably the first thing that signaled that something was off about Peace Talks.

Think about the previous books. Harry’s relationships are both a source of comfort and conflict for him, allowing him to learn and grow as a character, and none moreso than his relationship with Murphy. I have so many of their scenes vividly memorized by now because of how important both friendship and love are to Harry and to Murphy as well. There are milestones that they’ve reached starting from Storm Front onward. I would honestly argue it is the most developed relationship in the series, in terms of how much these two trust and respect and love one another and understand where they fit into the other person’s life. I remember reading that bit in White Night where Bob says they swapped souls through a hug and that left a huge impression on me because I think that’s what soulmates would look and sound like in real life (wouldn’t know, I am single af and going to die an old cat lady.) It’s to a point where, in my honest opinion, there is no Harry without Murphy. She is the other half of his soul. Where he is weak, she is strong, where she is weak, he is strong, and they move forward through every conflict knowing that about each other. And I think the reverse is true. We saw how Murphy took Harry’s disappearance and death—it fucking broke her. Her entire personality and beliefs came crashing down and while she was still able to function in his absence, she was just as much a ghost as he was.

So why the fuck wasn’t there anything in Peace Talks illustrating just how vital this relationship is?

I’m not keen on reading the book again, but from what I remember, we were given roughly three significant interactions between Harry and Murphy that had anything to do with their romance: Harry at the house while she’s recovering, the scene where she takes the casts off, and then her talking to him after Ebenezar almost kills him. And…that’s it. Do they still interact in the book? Yes. But it’s nothing memorable, aside from the threesome suggestion (in all fairness, that was hilarious, and it was even more hilarious to me that both Harry and Murphy didn’t outright say no).

Why is that weird? Because I can seriously name book by book how many significant conversations and scenes that Harry and Murphy have that develop their dynamic, sexy, fun, beautiful relationship…and yet the book where they’re actually together, after sixteen goddamn books, has almost nothing.

And it shouldn’t be like that at all.

I know my own bias. Really, I do. I’ve written so many Harry/Murphy fics that I was bound to be let down when we actually got the canon relationship, but the difference between me being let down and me feeling betrayed is that it feels like it’s for no reason. There are plenty of spots in the book considering it’s kind of short where Butcher could have given us insight into the way they hooked up for the first time. I know I don’t speak for the entire fandom, but I do know there are enough of you who like me wanted to know about their first “official” date or seeing how the people in his life reacted to them finally getting together after so many years. That’s not just shipper trash. That’s satisfying storytelling payoff. It is extremely important to us as readers and to the actual narrative itself that we see what it’s like for Harry and Murphy to be in a mature romantic relationship. Both of them have been longing and pining for each other for ages, and yet Butcher doesn’t give us the meaty bits we’re dying to chomp our teeth into. For God’s sake, Harry was hung up on the little things about Murphy, like her riding her motorcycle or her cute nose and ear lobes or the way she smiles or how she gives him the sass right back to his face. Yet we don’t get any indication of the momentous event of the first time he actually got to second base (or more) with her. We don’t see any of the things that we were clamoring for because these are two best friends giving in to serious feelings and that’s a huge deal since they’ve both pretty much been smitten since Storm Front.

It’s not a matter of appeasing shippers at this point. This relationship is a huge change that is important to both of them, and we didn’t get jackshit about the transition from friends to lovers. Hell’s bells, there’s an entire genre of fics in every work of fiction devoted to this trope and yet Butcher just skipped over it. I swear I’m not making mountains out of molehills. It doesn’t make sense that all the previous books with the exception of Dead Beat (since Murphy was out of town) have significant moments between Harry and Murphy that build on their friendship and partnership yet the moments in Peace Talks are way too short and aren’t anything groundbreaking or memorable. And this is them canonically together, heading for the iceberg, being with the person they love dearly. I want to know what that’s like because I care about them and it feels inorganic that it’s brushed off for plot or other things instead.

I don’t get it. I truly don’t. If Butcher is waiting to unleash the content I want in Battle Ground, I guess that’ll help, but after so much build up, why in God’s name wouldn’t you explore all the things we want to know about how their romance is going? Harry and Murphy have been through literal hell together, for God’s sake. They’re both cagey and in extremely stressful situations—especially poor Karrin—and yet it’s just brushed aside time and time again. It would keep us grounded to see how they handle it as it is one of the few nice things in their lives that they have left.

Those of you who know Butcher know that he’s one of the sadist authors. I know that too. He thinks it’s funny to make us angry and frustrate us and he may have already said it in an interview or a podcast why he chose not to go into detail about the romance (feel free to link me if he has) but for the first time in my life, I think that’s not good enough. It’s not a good enough excuse for Butcher to giggle and intentionally not give us the content we want just because he thinks it’s funny. Yes, as the author, you choose what you write, but this is a slap in the face to people who have been reading these books for so many years and rooting for Harry and Murphy to get their shit together and be happy. We know how the series is gonna end—fucking bloody as hell—so these precious moments are that much more important. If he’s said he didn’t include romantic elements in this book because “haha trollface,” then he can fuck off. We’ve invested time in this series. We care about the relationship and there are so many creative, fun things that could have come out of seeing them together after all this build up.

And yeah, I know, I can write another 185k words of fix it fics and missing scenes. I probably will anyway. I’m frustrated because this isn’t just some shallow checkmark romance in an urban fantasy series. These two are incredible characters and it’s a negative reflection on the work itself when Butcher spent all the time in previous books building up the sexual tension and the pining and the deeply felt affection only to just cut to curtains fluttering when they’re about to get to the hanky panky or just have a quick “I love you” in the tub or the brief talk about family at the end. There are so many conversations they could have had. There are so many scenarios with the potential for romance even with their chastity belts firmly in place due to Murphy’s injuries. This isn’t about sex. This is about fulfilling a precedent that Butcher purposely set up and then just seemed to wave it off for some reason. I’m not saying the book is bad because we didn’t get the content; I’m saying it would’ve been a lot goddamn better if we’d gotten that content. 

Butcher’s gonna Butcher. No one can change it. I can’t make demands. My fifteen bucks doesn’t mean I get to call the shots and tell the man what to write.

But I just want to note that I thought it was a pretty shitty choice to exclude it.

Sigh. See you guys in Battle Ground, I guess.

And also AO3.

I’m gonna write a fuckton of missing scenes and no one can stop me.

[tabloidtoc]

National Examiner, April 19

You can buy a copy of this issue for your very own at my eBay store: https://www.ebay.com/str/bradentonbooks

Cover: Tony Bennett's brave last days

Page 2: Stars with Mad Skills -- they became fast experts for plum roles -- Daniel Day-Lewis, Timothee Chalamet, Natalie Portman, Ryan Gosling, Jamie Foxx

Page 3: Adrien Brody, Margot Robbie, Bryan Cranston, Shia LaBeouf, Leonardo DiCaprio, Robert Downey Jr., Tom Cruise

Page 4: Susan Sarandon's roles and costumes

Page 7: Be Prepared for the Worst -- know these lifesaving tips before a crisis happens

Page 8: Lonely Stefanie Powers never wants to date because she still has gotten over lover William Holden's sudden death, even though it'll be 40 years ago this November -- the former star of '80s TV classic Hart to Hart, who's now 78, considers Holden the one true love of her life, even though she's been married twice to others and had a long-term relationship after the Hollywood legend's tragic death and she can't imagine being with anyone else at this stage in her life when Bill's memory is so sacred in her mind and his death still haunts her to this day, and it will only get worse as the anniversary approaches -- Holden, then 63, died at home in Santa Monica on November 12, 1981, of massive bleeding after falling and striking his head on a piece of furniture while heavily intoxicated -- it rips her apart to this day thinking how he must have suffered all alone in his apartment, bleeding to death -- the pair had a decade-long, passionate affair that lasted until his demise, which led her to carry on their mutual passion for wildlife conservation and Stefanie founded the William Holden Wildlife Foundation and is still the director -- she's tried being in other relationships, but it's been more about companionship than anything else and she doesn't have the motivation to date when the best man has already come and gone

Page 9: Vax Hacks -- avoid scammers who prey on fears of COVID-19

Page 10: His first day on the job as an honorary cop, Jeremiah met the other guys in blue and was the proud guest of honor at a special swearing-in ceremony just for him, and he's only five years old

Page 11: Important minerals for your body -- why you need zinc and potassium and how to get them

Page 12: Rude Awakening -- stars who don't mind their manners -- Alec Baldwin, Catherine Zeta-Jones, Christian Bale, Rachael Ray

Page 13: Sean Penn, Ashton Kutcher, Robert Pattinson, Russell Crowe, Cameron Diaz, Bruce Willis

Page 14: Dear Tony -- America's Top Psychic Healer Tony Leggett -- useful lessons learned from the pandemic

Page 15: Get well soon wishes go out to Chevy Chase, who just came out of the hospital after a five-week stay for heart issues -- in 2018, the star was diagnosed with alcohol cardiomyopathy, a weakening of the heart muscle caused by excessive drinking; he had dealt with his drinking back in 2016, when he entered the Hazelden Clinic to receive treatment for alcoholism

Page 16: Even though the century mark looms just around the corner, Betty White still radiates joy -- calling herself the luckiest broad on two feet, the 99-year-old Hollywood legend shares her advice for living a long and peaceful life -- she says her life is divided absolutely in half: half animals and half show business and you can't ask for better than two things you love the most

Page 18: When a California man won $145,000 on Wheel of Fortune, it turned out to be good fortune for a lot of people as he donated his entire winnings to the charity Uplift Family Services and Los Angeles Regional Food Bank, whose services support thousands of families

Page 19: These seniors are literally beating the coronavirus -- with 99 percent of them vaccinated, the 700 elderly residents of the Westminster-Canterbury on the Chesapeake Bay senior living community in Virginia Beach held a party and they had a lot to celebrate

Page 20: Cover Story -- Tony Bennett is facing his brave last days as he battles Alzheimer's disease at the age of 94 -- the singer was diagnosed in 2016, but kept the terrible illness secret until recently and has not yet experienced common Alzheimer's symptoms like episodes of terror, rage or depression but the disease has progressed -- for now, wife Susan Crow and the oldest of Tony's four kids, 67-year-old Danny from his first marriage, are caring for him while he lives in the couple's New York City apartment

Page 22: Recycle your baubles, bangles and beads -- bored with your beaded necklaces? Blase abut those old bangles? If your costume jewelry collection no longer inspires, there are many brilliant ways to give it new life or earn you some cash

Page 24: The internet's newest fitness star is 102-year-old Julia Fulkerson, who had a ball participating in her great-grandson Brody's virtual gym class

Page 25: Young Darius Brown has a mission in life: to make shelter dogs look as spiffy as he can so they'll get adopted and to do that, he provides the canines with slews of adorable bowties that he sews himself -- five years ago, when Darius was eight, his sister Dazhai taught him to sew and the passion was good for him because he'd been diagnosed with speech and fine-motor skills that the craft improved over time -- he says he saw how happy the people at the shelter were to get the bowties and how much the dogs liked them, and he decided to make more and he came up with a goal to give bowties to an animal shelter in every state -- so far, he's sewn a whopping 600 of the canine accessories himself, and helped dozens of pooches find forever homes and he especially likes to focus his attention on older animals and pets with disabilities, since they're the toughest to find homes for and the shelter directors say Darius' efforts have made a huge difference in the life of hundreds of pups

Page 26: Summer Horoscope 2021

Page 28: It's not just for the birds -- tips for watching our fine feathered friends

Page 32: Reverse Gear -- walking backward is good for you -- here's something new to try the next time you go out for a walk: do it backward -- it may sound silly, but health experts say there are mental and physical benefits to the practice, but go slowly at first to avoid injuries

* If you're always putting the needs of others before your own, you could be at risk for compassion fatigue, a condition that can physically and mentally drain you of time and energy -- compassion fatigue is a state of emotional overwhelm that is constant and persistent, once in this state of emotional exhaustion, it becomes difficult to empathize with those they help and essentially, it's empathy burnout

Page 34: Grandads Before 50! No rocking chairs for these grandpas -- take a look at these celebs who had their grandchildren before their first gray hair -- Jim Carrey, James Brolin, Donny Osmond, Mick Jagger, Pierce Brosnan, Charlie Sheen

Page 40: The Element of Earth -- earth is the second of the four elements: fire, earth, air and water

Page 42: 10 Things You Didn't Know About Drew Barrymore

Page 44: Eyes on the Stars -- Dakota Johnson and her parents Melanie Griffith and Don Johnson (picture), Kristen Stewart as Princess Diana in the film Spencer (picture), Tina Turner admits she instantly fell for husband Erwin Bach in 1986 when they first met at an airport in Germany, Bindi Irwin gave birth to daughter Grace Warrior Irwin Powell, Michael Douglas is still going strong after 5 decades as an actor and loves what he does for a living, George Segal passed away due to complications from bypass surgery, Jessica Walter died in her sleep

Page 45: Eddie Murphy is inducted into NAACP Image Awards Hall of Fame (picture), Diana Ross performs at the Segerstrom Center for the Arts in California (picture), Mario Lopez helps christen the tables at Mohegan Sun Casino in Las Vegas (picture), Ann-Margret and Julianne Hough attend the Family Film Awards where the redhead received a lifetime achievement award (picture), James Middleton who is the brother of Duchess Kate says he and fiancee Alizee Thevenet are done with city living, Justin Bieber's mom didn't like his newest tattoo saying Don't you have enough yet?, Zac Efron was spotted flying to Sydney with Aussie girlfriend Vanessa Valladares, Taraji P. Henson asked fans for prayers for her pet pooch that was suffering from post-surgery complications but he unfortunately died

Page 46: A lottery winner in Tennessee was feeling like a million bucks, until he realized he'd lost his precious ticket but he didn't give up: he retraced his steps until he found the ticket again

[bellamygateoldblog]

The 100 7x01: Discussion

My general takeaway from the episode can be summarised like this: Echo is spectacular. (I might’ve said “oh my god look at her!!!!!” and “ugh she is just The Best” too many times to count).

This is long-ish because I really just wanted to consolidate my thoughts in one place. Bitch it’s me i got a lot to say!!!!!

The Good Parts

— The farmhouse setting. While it’s existence is strange and “a sore thumb” and worked to further push Sanctum being the abomination born of clumsily mixing genres and time periods in terms of construction/costuming, making everything appear disconnected and obnoxious, it was still a nice change. It made me feel warmer and more comfortable as a ‘modern’ viewer. It’s a breath of fresh air from the constant dark element: dilapidated post-apoc buildings falling from their foundation, endless woods, and equally cold-feeling labs and skeleton dungeons.

— Echo. This was a damn good episode for Echo and every second reminded me of why she’s my favourite. She’s a badass. I always love to see her falling naturally into leadership of her little ragtag groups who accept it wholeheartedly. From the “testing a theory” moment where she went ‘when Gabriel doesn’t speak >>>’, to right at the end when she killed the solider about to “eliminate” Hope (hesitation is death...oh no he can’t hear us he’s got airpods in oh my god). It was Echo that got them through the whole sequence with the anomaly, Echo who figured shit out, Echo who quickly judged the situations and formed plans to overcome the obstacles. In other words: she did THAT.

Favourite scene: Echo coming face-to-face with the projection of her own insecurities in the form of Roan and Echo 1.0, and physically overcoming them (shooting them down), along with the trauma and pain that they both represent. The perserverence and getting the job done despite the emotional torture felt like a callback to the Psychosis episode of 6x02 when she was clever enough to sedate herself to silence the voices in her head. I also think the dialogue chosen was also foreshadowing that she would become a leader by the finale (commander?) and i love to see it!

— Clarke and Madi’s conversation. Oh Clarke, you just keep reinforcing and validating my perceptions of who you are as a person over and over again lol. In all her self-importance failing to remember that Madi, in fact, had and was raised by her biological parents for half of her life (and the new knowledge that she spent six years telling her little mind tales from the book of her life whilst apparently never taking the time to learn about Madi’s or acknowledge/honour her birth parents in any way) is “yeah that’s about right” to me. Sure you could say she was still reeling from the events of six and her death-almost death-almost death again. But I’ve always had this Thing about the relationship between Clarke and Madi. And i’ve seen some of the lighthearted humourous reception that scene got from fandom, “#where do you think the child CAME from?!” which only served to remind me of my own impression that Clarke views Madi as wholely ‘hers’, as if Madi’s existence was tied to Clarke, but i might elaborate in a seperate post.

This scene was a lovely display of self-awareness I’ve rarely seen on Clarke (never even got it when she electrocuted said child two seasons ago- however that absense of apology and acknowledgement of the sheer wrongness of that action also fits very nicely with my view of her lmao, still though, a weird choice for your ‘heroine’).

— Clarke’s “feels like a different world.” Felt romantically-coded. I think Gaia/Clarke might be the most convinient relationship to transform into romance at this point. However I’m sincerely hoping this road they could go down won’t reduce Gaia to a crutch/accessory for Clarke, and that she doesn’t become merely a love interest. I’ve seen talk already of Gaia being “Clarke’s happiness” etc.. which is already confirming my worst fears. Sigh.

This moment very much felt like found closure and the turning of a page. But i will say it was a very sharp turn from the three seasons of shoehorned-in mentions of Lexa, and last season’s emphasis on Clarke’s very-much intact emotional response to her memory- “it’s why you cry when you think about Lexa”- to her looking at an image of Lexa’s memory of her, reminicing but having no emotional response to it, and brushing it off while sharing a soft look with Gaia (and this is a few days since s6? I don’t know how this timeline is working but Tbh it’s not like these writers ever concerned themselves with ‘realistic time frames’ anyway lol). Yep, Jason’s seasons are individual “movies,” alright.

Other *nodding approvingly* moments

— Raven’s subtle “elevator eyes” on Clarke when she started giving her orders again. I see you, Miss Reyes, and I appreciate you.

— Raven + the foot in her mouth and the cute way she catches herself both times. I just love watching characters fail at existing LOL. She was feeling more human than stereotype or plot device this episode.

— "Mommy and Auntie O” and the implication that Hope is a child inside an aged-up body.

— This quote: “I know what it’s like to lose your family 100 years ago and yesterday at the same time.” It’s so literal but I like it a lot.

— Clarke being ‘leader’ again is, as usual, solely a matter of convinient (and familial/love) circumstances and it felt very true.

The Rest

— The Eligius Situation. So Clarke and her inner circle conquer and live in a nice home, and we’re specifically told Clarke takes the master suite (and the dog), and I was like ‘fair enough’ but then she orders prison labour. She tells them to build her a compound that they won’t actually get to be apart of, and to live in tents while they do so. They aren’t getting anything out of this (before they resist and set their own terms). This is slavery. Also, those aren’t her people to boss around, look down on, and use accordingly for her own gain (in fact they barely know her or why she’s gone from being that one unloyal woman who executed their men and got herself captured like an idiot, then couldn’t make up her mind about which side she wanted to kill- to one in the uppermost position of authority...like...they woke up yesterday) But, then again, that never stopped her.

— Too much and not enough at the same time. The pacing of the episode in general was awful. Too much happening in quick succession, no breathing room, too many factions (no, actually Raven, where is ALIE when you need her? smh). I blink, I miss an entire scene and a character is now beating someone else up. Amazingly, i was still bored 90% of the time.

— The Children of Gabriel calling themselves “The Children of Gabriel.” It was always goofy, even more so when a grown man is saying it.

— Murphy + his self loathing over Abby’s death. Did I miss the part where she was ever good to him? One of their final moments together was of her telling him he deserved to die over Clarke after she spent the entire series treating him like he was inferior and disposable. uhhhhhhhhhh.

— The picnic scene. Jackson’s sudden violent outburst was unearned (it wasn’t even set up???), and also disrespectful. Wrong place, wrong time, bro. He’s grieving? Okay. But when Abby’s daughter is sitting right in front of you, making this about you, ruining a perfectly good toast in her honour with your uncomfortable accusations loses you points you never even had to begin with. And this is a ‘me’ thing but I can’t be bothered to be sympathetic when this is about Abby Griffin.

Also, I have to say it. Eliza’s acting took me out of the scene every time I looked at Clarke. I couldn’t for the life of me work out what those expressions were supposed to be.

— Russell, his manpain, and a fury over the consiquences of his own actions  that could rival the grounders (”my brother died in your ring of fire [while he was trying to murder you all]” hmm sounds like a you problem). But the worst part is, I simply couldn’t tell where he stood or what he was feeling. He’s so one-dimensional. He’s an evil man (so much for ”grey morality”).

— Clarke + Jordan. A small point to make but all Clarke has done since Marper made her ‘Godmother’ of their son has blame him for everything bad happening lol. Marper loses a lot of my respect as time goes on for that choice. As much as I dislike Jordan’s presence in the show, still not a great pattern to have noticed.

— Raven seeking approval from Clarke (specifically) for the Prime idea was...weird and very bad. When has Raven ever cared for Clarke’s validation, especially in the last few seasons?

Was also taken aback by how Indra and Miller are both suddenly so protective of Clarke, like i can make sense of the Indra part even though it relies on me making things up that aren’t supported by what’s on screen, but Miller?

— (Bonus moment that was bad for me, but not for the same reason it was for the rest of you: the scene of Hope finding the message in her arm. When she was removing the blood-soaked bandage I freaked out because I thought she was peeling her skin off. You’re welcome for that visual.)

The Mixed/No Feelings

— Clarke’s full-dark-no-stars. How many times have they told me now she’s “the head”? LMAO. 

I have no actual formed opinion on it. Only disjointed thoughts. Like i might’ve just gone “good for her” if Clarke wasn’t the person she is, with the history she has.

I appreciate the idea, to have her spend the whole episode declaring she is, in fact, completely fine, to end it having her explode with the repressed pain.

I mean...i realise the cognition behind it, but it’s eye-roll inducing at this point. This- kicking Russell to death (giving him exactly what he wanted and set out to provoke), and burning down a palace she promised to keep intact, once again going against the group to do her own Thing that they all ultimately have the suffer the consiquences of and help clean up- is just a repeat of past patterns, and Monty’s “do better” mantra that she desperately clung to like she owned it last season is nowhere in sight.

(Also, I can’t be the only one who spotted her physically smacking that Sanctum girl as she walked onto the balcony? Not cool. Wasn’t cool when Murphy acted like a dick to one of them either this episode.)

The rushed switch did a number on me, too, like Jackson’s did. Literally five minutes before she was preaching about a peaceful life for Madi that doesn’t take revenge (I think I know what they were going for with that but it just left me feeling confused and frustrated).

Furthermore, I’ve seen talk that this was her “burning down of a symbol of oppression”, something she experienced first hand (not so unlike Blodreina and the bunker she desperately wanted to escape and deliver her people from), but there was no noble, calculated intention there. She burned the palace accidentally in her rage because she was in pain and disorientated. The moral stuff was just an after effect.

The speech was also very ‘Clarke’. Feeling entitled to and making decisions on who lives and dies right after declaring this wasn’t their kill to make. She wasn’t the only person hurt by the Primes (but we’ve also been given no reason to care about any of the other victims- the manipulated, enslaved population have been turned into a joke and a punching bag for the main characters which...isn’t great either). And the castle could’ve been used to shelter some of the “too many people” we had problems with through the episode (or used to harvest resources from). It really comes down to if i think the situation justifies the reaction and if i hold her wholely responsible...and this is the part where i reiterate that i have no intact opinion and don’t actually care to have one either ha.

[ramblings-of-a-mad-cat]

at it again with my fandom crossover bullshit to ask what type of benders you think the HPHM kids would be if they lived in the Avatar universe (I’ve been thinking about rewatching the show lately so elements and characters has been on the brain lol)

Fandom Crossovers are wonderful and must be protected and explored! Oh boy, you totally should re-watch it. I’m getting to the end of Season 2 again and my god did I forget how on edge everything was. How much it all came together...I should also say in advance that for a lot of these, I just get a gut feeling that’s hard to fully explain, but I’ll try my best. 

Iroh described Fire as the element of power. Described the fire nation’s primary strength being it’s determination to achieve goals. Fire is also the element that can most easily hurt someone if you don’t have it under control. With all that in mind, I can see Merula being a fire-bender, but likely without the focus that one would require to generate lightning. Hurting people in a misguided attempt to prove her own power is pretty much what drove Merula as an antagonist in the early days. Tulip, however, would be able to use lightning and might even specialize in it. Ben, likewise, probably wouldn’t be able to bend much at all in Years 1-4 (except as the Red Cloak) but he would be a fire-bender and a damn powerful one after he finally finds his confidence. I also feel like fire would be Charlie’s element of choice, and I doubt need to explain why.

I think it kinda goes without saying that Talbott is an air-bender. The air nomads detached themselves from the concerns of the world to find true freedom, and I really can’t help but be reminded of Talbott’s style of “flying solo.” I can’t help but feel like, in combat, he would use the quick and evasive style that we see Aang utilizing. For obvious reasons, he’s a character we associate with the sky, and I think he would absolutely be able to fly with air-bending. I can also see Jacob as an air-bender for similar reasons. He had his head in the clouds, as it were. Skye is the same way. Diego would be another character that would definitely take advantage of the movements and choreography air-bending offers to use in dancing. 

Iroh also described the earth kingdom as being steadfast and diverse. (You might notice the pattern that I’m using his interpretation of the elements, and that is because it’s one of my favorite monologues in the whole damn show.) The element of earth is enduring and persistent and like water, it can assume many forms. Rowan is definitely an earth-bender. Orion could easily be an air-bender, but I tend to see him as more of earth-bender. Same goes for Murphy. Same goes for Bill. Despite their quirks, these characters are measured and wise in their own ways. They’ve seen and dealt with their own trials. 

Water is the element of change, it’s easily the most versatile and adaptable. One of the great strengths of the water-benders is the comradery and loyalty among them. I think Penny would be a fine example of a water-bender who exhibits that. She’s often shown as a foil for Merula too, so there’s that. Beatrice has gone through an intense metamorphosis since her introduction, so she would represent change as well. And speaking of adaptability...I think Rakepick is a water-bender. I can see her utilizing ice to create shards that are razor sharp as weapons. And goodness, if there was ever a character in this game that could blood-bend...need I say more? 

Did I miss anyone? Let’s see...Chiara, definitely a water-bender if only because of her connection to the full moon. Jae would also be a water-bender, I think, because he’s pretty adaptable as well. Liz is the very definition of steadfast, so she’s an earth-bender. Badeea is someone that I can see as an air-bender. In life, I think Duncan was a fire-bender. Erika Rath strikes me as having earth-bender energy. So does Barnaby. Ismelda, like the Haywoods, strikes me as a water-bender. But the big question left...who would be the Avatar? (No, it’s not MC.)

Jacob does come to mind, since like Aang, he vanishes for a long time. But I don’t think it would be him. But there’s another character who has the energy of being extremely powerful and not really knowing how to properly use that power. Someone with a rare ability that one must be born with, that she could use to further her own ends, but instead she simply uses for fun. Tonks is the Avatar, folks. I’m sayin’ it. Tonks is the Avatar. You heard it here first.

[faunusrights]

OFFAL HUNT REMASTERED LIVEBLOG // CHAPTER 19

IN THIS EPISODE OF MURPHY IS SCREAMING, CONSTANTLY, TRAPPED IN THEIR PERFECT NIGHTMARE:

Glynda was saying: “I know we aren’t friends. I know we aren’t partners. I know you’re a criminal. But—I think I can trust you. I think I have to trust you, even if you’ve done awful things before.”

EVERYTHING GOES WRONG BUT LIKE SOMEHOW WORSE THAN EVER? LIKE A WHOLE NEW BRAND OF LOW. LIKE CINDER’S GOT A PICKAXE AND THE CENTRE OF THE PLANET CALLS FOR AID.

IT’S BEEN A WHILE HUH!!!!!!!!!!!!!! but dw offal hunt, like the rising of the sun, the arrival of winter, and the eventual downfall of capitalism, always returns. so lets go.

(i just quickly reread chapter 18 liveblog to remember what happened and Ah Yes I Remember Now. The Suppressed Memories)

The place was emptier without Glynda. Quieter.

/gunshot oh we’re in danger right out of the gate huh? we got some yearning right out here? right now? how quickly the turn do tables.

Cinder appraised her work, holding the beige coat up to the light and squinting.

man i forgot. i FORGET. how much i just love cinder in this fic. sometimes she kinda zones to the back of my mind where she sits waiting for me to start thinking about her again, but now i remember that this cinder is Peaque. look at her GO, minding her own BUSINESS. im proud of her. does she know i love her.

It didn’t take long to don her new, fire-proofed clothes.

in another world, in a more comical plot, she used asbestos. it didnt go well.

The subtle warmth of the Dust teased tension from Cinder’s stiff muscles, even as she marvelled at the strangeness of her own bedroom’s space. It seemed bigger now than it had the last two nights.

h

She chose not to dwell on it.

h

i choose to dwell on it! ME!!!! I CHOOSE TO DWELL ON IT. HEY CINDER WHAT THIS GAY SHIT. hello. ma’am. can we look deeper into this. i, for one, would like to, and i, for one, think its of value to think abt this. that said, small segue

Quietly, Cinder murmured, “I didn’t freak out.”

THE FACT SHE SAYS IT ALOUD LIKE EM AND MERC CAN HEEEEEEAR HEEEEEEEER i am. INFATUATED with this family. cant wait for the 100k spinoff thats basically an elongated beach episode where they go to like. alton towers. or butlins. six flags??? thats a thing in america right??? anyway. beach episode. call me. (wink wink nudge nudge push push shove shove)

 We had to stop back in because Merc left his favorite binder, and it was 2 in the morning, so it was easier to crash here for the night than mess with the ship’s autopilot.

them,,, THEM!!!! mercury is just a son and childe. thast it. he canot change this. i love these kids so much i am SHAKING THE MONITOR RN!!!!!!! AAAAAAAAA

Stuck here in one of the homes they’d shared, Cinder missed them terribly. Missed the sound of their voices and the easy comfort of their presence. Finding the time to contact them had been difficult, between managing Glynda and Hati both, but Glynda was gone, and she’d sent Hati onwards to Atlas. She remembered her call with Emerald, before arriving in Umbraroot; she knew it had not soothed her or her fears.

im sorry was this chapter targeted at me, specifically, as a human being on planet earth? GOD!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! I LOVE THIS FAMILY!!!!!!!!! THIS WONKY OLD BANDAGED UP FAMILY UNIT!!!!!!!!!!!!! i thrive every time they are mentioned on the page. it is a blessing. my succulents grow stronger each time they show up.

“No,” Cinder argued softly, “I had to. Mercury, you deserve to hear it from me as well. I am sorry. And I am promising you: I’ll come back.”

For a long, heart-wrenching moment, he was completely quiet. It was good that Cinder was alone in the apartment; laying herself bare like this would be unbearable with an audience.

GODDDDDDDDDDD AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA

i am OBSESSED WITH THIS!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! IM GOING TO BE THINKING ABOUT THIS UNTIL I D I E. of all thing the remaster does better than og, this is just. SPEEDING AHEAD. this whole CONFLICT this whole MESS just makes everything so much RICHER its like when u splash some wine in yr fancy food or stick some cinnamon on yr favourite desserts u dont NEED TO but it adds that lil SOMETHING,,, that little KICK that just ties the flavour profile together and in this case ofgughugguhu it just GIVES SO MUCH. im making SNOW ANGELS in the WORDS on the PAGE.

“Mercury. If I could prove it to you, I would. But you have to—trust me. For just a while longer.”

“It’s getting harder,” he said. He didn’t sound like he was lying just to hurt her. That wasn’t spite. That was honest anger. And it made her feel like dirt.

im less picking these for specific instances of like, things i want to say, but more just because bits of this r rly just so /chef kiss. cinder has these.... endearingly (take that whichever way u like) human qualities in OG to rly make u realise she had ties to add to her #Doubt but the remaster is just AMPING it up and u FEEL IT and ive never been more SYMPATHETIC to a round-faced sinnamon bun of assholery and fire id DIE for cinder fall and this is a fact PUT IT ON MY GRAVESTONE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

“Is there anything you need?” What was this? Cinder could barely focus on her words. It felt like... “Anything? At all?”

“We’re fine.”

“Mercury, wait please—” She was losing him. “I think—”

“Just hurry up.”

The line went dead.

this place is not a place of honor.................. no highly esteemed deed is commemorated here........................ nothing valued is here................ IM DYING

Cinder began to type out her response, and that was when the nausea really kicked in. 

[...] 

She recognized this now.

Glynda.

stress stress stress stress STRESSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSS

There shouldn’t be anybody. Cinder had done everything in her power to cut Glynda from people who would interfere. To isolate her. Make it easier to bring her to Atlas, to the frozen north, to her mother and the machine…

Cinder’s esophagus quivered; furiously, she shut her eyes and thought of nothing.

god cinder don’t remind me that you’re an asshole and dipshit and also a moron im trying to be NICE and CARE ABT YOU!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! STOP REMINDING ME YOU’RE A PIECE OF SHIT!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! 

FOR FIVE MINUTES!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

The front door clicked open.

Cinder couldn’t have said how much time had passed, only that it had passed slowly. What she did know was that it was Glynda returning, the sensation of boils bursting wafting off her soul. It crawled over Cinder’s flesh. She curled in on herself.

There were mites under every nailbed. Salt in her weeping mouth.

offal hunt’s brilliant use of this horror aspect is something i have tried previously to emulate and here’s a fact, take it from me: that shit is HARD. offal hunt consistently able to whack those real nasty, really Disgusting vibes on the head EVERY TIME is a work of art. i mean, kc and diesel do not fuck around, and therefore i am NOT surprised, but it’s only when u try this shit yourself that you realise: this is hard! this is difficult! it’s a huge testament to how GOOD this fic is in every way. also this whole fucking body horror aspect is something i didnt know this fic needed, but it did, and here we are. 

Thickly: “Things were going okay. If you hadn’t gotten nasty, I might have smoothed things over. I could have fixed things with my son.”

with my son

with my son

with my son

AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA I CANT TAKE IT EVERY TIME ITS TOO MUCH FOR TO BEAR I CANNOT HANDLE IT I CANNOT STAND IT ITS LIKE BEING SHOT JUST DIRECTLY IN MY DICK

AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA

AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA

im like sweating rn

Glynda said, “I’m scared.”

“Why?”

“I don’t want to tell you.”

I SAID IM SWEATING

Glynda asked, “Are you lying to me?”

And Cinder said, “What?”

“About me. About Witches. About Ozpin—” Cinder’s guts went sour. “—About anything. I need to know if I can trust you.”

I SAID I! AM! S W E A T I N G

“I know you’ve lied to people. Hurt people.”

Adrenaline and the image of her kids’ faces behind her eyes made a potent, sick cocktail. “—Not. Now.”

so lets like double back to when i said hey was this chapter written to target me specifically and as it turns out, yes. yes it was. yes it was and as MUCH AS I AM LIVING FOR THIS MOMENT THIS SWEET BUILDUP THE EXPLOSION AND THE CRATER IT ALL LEAVES BEHIND

I

AM

so this next bit is like. i cant really quote one section but as i was saying in Vague DMs, this whole bit feels like wading through mud. usually if you say something consumes energy to Read it’s in a Bad Way when yr bored but this is more like. you Feel cinder all over everything feels so sluggish and it’s like dragging your own corpse around as you try and leave and you’re TIRED and your LEGS HURT and you’re kinda thinking god what if i just fell face down for just a moment of my LIFE.

The putrid weight of Glynda’s soul filled the room until there was no space left for her.

it’s like being trapped in a sauna, like getting stuck in a humid waiting room. where do you GO. what do you DO. god this whole section is fantastic and offal hunt NEVER fails to fucking nail the Vibes but reading it is HARD. i literally keep having to stop and breathe like ive been holding my breath. jesus h christ.

a small intermission for a mood:

“Get fucked.”

back to regularly scheduled hell

Out of the bedroom. Down the hall. The walls were sweating with heat. She tasted smoke. 

i love that i just said how i feel like im trapped in a sauna and it turns out: thats because me and cinder both, baybee!!!! hahahaha help

Glynda’s soul chewed her to the marrow. “Move, Glynda.” 

cinder being hunted at the start of this fic: teehee! im running away! now im gonna getcha! heehee! arent i clever :) cinder being hunted now: this uh. this blows, actually,

Cinder’s pulse roared in her ears. Her hands twitched. She smelled Ochre Brown’s round face melting off. His wide smile shattered with each of his teeth, going black and popping like corn.

this chapter is probably my favourite so far for this blending of so many elements. i cant even begin to like. THINK STRAIGHT about how all of this is tying together. the lore. the THEMATICS. like i said this character rly is just Rich with what og lacked and oh is it RICH. im gonna read this chapter in future and see so much that i know ive already missed. holy shit.

“Ms. Fall,” she said. “The White Fang requires your presence immediately.”

NOT NOW

Cinder stood there looking at it for a moment. Her thoughts were slow. Copper-tinged. Something small and indulgent whispered to her through the blood-fog.

It was obvious enough what would happen if she got into this car. The driver would take her to a secluded place, where she would be ambushed by a squadron of battle-hungry White Fang grunts.

They’d try to take her down. And she was a killer, wasn’t she? Ochre Brown wailed in her ears with every thump of her runaway heart. Her hands itched for action; her teeth, for blood.

She’d burn them black.

never mind! you are already dead,

She thought about Glynda. About her saying that if there was trouble with the Fang, she wanted to come. That she would fight for Cinder.

She thought of Glynda’s question: What aren’t you telling me about Ochre Brown?

Yeah, fuck that.

AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA OH MY GOD!!!!!!!!!! WHAT A CLIFFHANGER!!!!!!!!!! WHAT A MOMENT!!!!!!!!!!!!! MORE MOMENTOUSLY: WHAT A CHAPTER!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

this is EASILY my favourite chapter so far. EASILY. everything about this was peak offal. the relationships. the dynamics. the dialogue. the vibes. the Grossness. the fighting. the EVERYTHING. this is some other level and its BITCHIN. PEAK. that said im now very tired. im going to have a cup of tea and Consider Things for a few hours. brb.

[miraphoenix]

Tagged by: @just-odradek; I think this is the first time I’ve gotten tagged in something like this on this blog??

Nickname: I used to have one, but it’s fallen out of use in my family because they’re all working on using my new name. The nickname was Bean, and it was used way more than my birthname when I was a kid, unless someone was very pissed at me.

Gender: None gender with left beef (trans agender)

Sign: Aquarius sun, Aries moon, Gemini rising; I’ve been told this explains lots of things about me, but I know jack shit about astrology so?

Song stuck in my head: Broadside Electric’s version of The World Turned Upside Down. It’s not at all connected to the H*milton thing, it’s a song about an English movement back in 1649, when a bunch of people tried to farm common land and got harassed and assaulted by the army, and eventually forced off the land by said army and legal suits. Oysterband and Dick Gaughan also good versions of the song.

Sexuality: Sex-repulsed bi, I think is the best way to frame this one. Labels are hard.

Favorite animal: Oh heck, I really do have too many? I don’t even know if I can narrow that down to favorite extinct one vs favorite extant one... 

Current time: 2:30pm when I finished this question, dunno what time it’ll be when I finish this thing.

Cats or Dogs: I enjoy both! I think I’m more likely to have a cat in the future, though, as I’m pretty picky about dogs that I would personally live with.

Last movie I watched: Ponyo!

Last thing I googled: The lyrics to a Dropkick Murphys tune (Worker’s Song, for the curious)

Other blogs: None anymore. (This blog is a remake after I got tired of dealing with an annoying abusive asshole, and left my old one.)

Do I get asks: Nope. Although they are open!

Dream Job: I have better things to dream about than work.

When I created my blog: July 2019; my original blog was started back in March 2014.

Reasons for URL: It’s a contraction of “mirazin phoenix”, mirazin being the element of dreams from a now-private setting that a close friend and I share, and phoenix being... A gigantic fiery bird that dies and resurrects itself. So more or less, a big bird of dreams and fire that doesn’t have the good sense to stay dead. Which I feel like is a better representative of myself than my old url.

Following: 65; some of those are inactive, but are friends’ old blogs that it would feel wrong to not follow, yanno?

Average sleep: My body seems to just sleep 8 hours whether I like it or not.

Luck number: I’m fond of numbers divisible by three.

Currently wearing: The same thing I’m always wearing; tshirt, quick-dry zip-off shorts. I would dress like a goth palaeontologist, but I don’t have the money, and fashion is hard for my easily-overheating agender self. So I dress comfortably and try not to look at myself too long.

Dream trip: This is gay and corny, but getting to go out and see my dear friend again. I had wanted to go for their birthday this year, but +gestures broadly at the state of the US rn+

Favorite food: I mean, I would stab a guy for good feta, but past that I’m pretty flexible? It’s easier for me to list foods I don’t like. Like fish. Love working with fish, but the smell of it as a food... Big old nope.

Favorite song: So you might be able to tell by now that I’m real shit at picking single favorites of things? So I’m gonna give a few here. Adrenalin - New Model Army Born Feral - New Model Army Hurricane (Johnny’s Theme) - Lord Huron London Calling - The Clash This Must Be The Place - Talking Heads Blood Red Roses - Oysterband 100 Years of Solitude - The Levellers Lies Greed Misery - Linkin Park (also anything off of A Thousand Suns) My Way Home - Kirsty MacColl Beautiful Apocalypse - Kamelot Basically my taste in music is moderately eclectic and this isn’t even the half of it.

Instruments: I used to play French horn way back in the day. I want to learn to play the bagpipes one of these days.

Tagging: uhhhhh anyone who’s feeling like it? @kefnut-the-threski, have you done this one yet? @hookteeth, if you want to? No pressure, of course.

[someone-elses-star]

The 100 6x13: The Blood of Sanctum Personal Narrative

The finale is here, people! Are you jazzed?! ME TOO! I’m also so grateful that we know that next season will be the last. For me, that means that it was known far enough ahead of time for the writers to give us a good conclusion to the series we all love. 

LET’S GET THIS SHIT STARTED! 

Wow. No introduction? That hurts. I love hearing Eliza’s beautiful accent!

Seeing Abby die again hurts. 

Well....you’re half right Indra.

Clarke is such a good actress.

Indra loves her daughter so much.

Hmmm....another planet. Interesting.

Oh. Poor Clarke having to hurt her baby.

Planet Beta and Gamma and Delta and Epsilon. Wow. Someone was really horribly uncreative in naming.

Opes. Clarke is breaking. We know she is eventually going to, but what will be the breaking point?

Eliza is an amazing actress. I mean....damn....she deserves all the awards for this season.

I like how Shannon’s name is still there and we haven’t seen him in...what...three episodes? Four?

Ope. They’re surrounded.

And now they have gas thrown in. Great.

Poor Bellamy has been gagged so much this season. Poor baby.

Wow. That was a quick death. 

Don’t you dare kill Miller!

Blood of Sanctum? Really? It’s a drink? Is it actual blood?

Murphy and Emori playing parts. Love it!

Murphy. Being kissed by a man who loves who he’s supposed to be....that was awesome!

I seriously love the pretty planet on the skyline. Too bad we can’t enjoy it more with all the chaos.

COMMERCIAL BREAK #1 THOUGHTS: Not too many thoughts yet, honestly. Love seeing Murphy kissed by a dude though. Kinda hot. Definitely his reaction is going to get them found out rather soon. 

Oh. Poor Clarke’s last hope that her mother was still alive.

And now they know. That’s a good reason to break.

Seriously no pity for Russell. 

Raven in her element is awesome!

Back story about the evil heda. And Indra was alive during his rule? Damn.

A kill code?

Love that he is making them choose between Madi and the Flame. 

With pleasure. Love this Raven

Damn. So close!

Love.

No. She’s lying. That’s not Abby. She’s faking it. Don’t fall for it Clarke!

Good Clarke. Question everything!

And Simone floats. Goodbye Abby’s body. 

COMMERCIAL BREAK #2 THOUGHTS: Russell is truly alone now. And, honestly, not even feeling sorry for him. He lied and murdered just so that he and his family could live. Then he tried to kill Clarke so that his daughter could skip the line and be reborn. Then he killed Abby to bring back his wife when the truth was revealed to some of his followers. No pity. Does that make me heartless? 

Now Russell knows Madi isn’t really Madi right now.

Is Madi really gone? Is the evil heda going to be used to trick her?

Or are our theories correct and Clarke is going to bring her back by threatening to kill herself?

And there is Jordan! Finally! He’s just....delusional. Love it.

Because they’re brainwashed Bellamy.

Oh....and Octavia bringing understanding to the group.

Come on Murphy. Be a little better at being a hero. 

Octavia! And Bellamy! Blake’s reunited!

And once Bellamy is in. Everyone follows.

“At least lie to me!” Lol Murphy.

“Being a god should be more fun than this.” Murphy always has the best lines. Lol

COMMERCIAL BREAK #3 THOUGHTS: So happy about the Blake’s being reunited and teaming up. That “side by side” line killed me! I loved it so much! I can’t believe we are already halfway through! A lot has happened, but still not enough. I know they said we would be left at a sort of cliffhanger at the end of this season, but damn. I need more conclusion and answers to this season! Thank goodness we are getting 16 episodes for the final season! We’ll need every single one!

Clarke is back with her people.

Poor Clarke is falling apart. 

Poor Clarke seeing her daughter this way.

This is going to work. I know it will. Madi loves her. She’ll break through.

And we’ve got Madi back! 

But of course the evil one is going to fight her! Fight Madi! You can beat him!

Save her Raven! Delete that bastard! Kill the Flame!

Save Madi! 

Thank goodness for Jackson!

Damn that thing has a long wire. So gross.

And what will they do without a commander? Live better probably.

Raven and Clarke hugs! Yay!

And now the upload is in the computer?

COMMERCIAL BREAK #4 THOUGHTS: Is the evil heda going to be put into a body? Is he going to be a new enemy? The enemy for season 7 perhaps? Or will this be resolved before the end of the episode? Very interesting character. It would be kinda cool to see more of him. 

Murphy acting as another is still very dramatic and full of flare. Though I don’t think his cover will last because of the rejected kiss. Murphy is totally in danger. 

Echo and Octavia bonding. Kinda dig it.

Zev will totally know that Murphy isn’t Daniel. 

Or...is Murphy handling it? What a good cockroach!

I really thought Gabriel was going to just get his throat slashed instead of drink that shit. Oh wait...they took that antidote. Nevermind. I get it.

And now there is fighting! Not a finale without it.

“Good kisser, too.” I totally support a bi Murphy! 

We never get to see Murphy fight that much. Loved it!

Bellamy, Octavia, and Echo are such badasses.

And now the crazy chick is burning herself. That’s....crazy.

Octavia’s redemption arc is on fire! Literally....

And Octavia has writing on her back.....

So she was gone for a long time. 

Means she has to go back. 

COMMERCIAL BREAK #5 THOUGHTS: So our theories about everyone going into the anomaly was probably right, then? That’s awesome! And it effects time which is super cool! So are we thinking time travel or just a time warp of some sort? I feel like just a time warp makes more sense, honestly, but definitely a mixture of the two could be possible. This is definitely one of those questions I’m sure we will have answered next season. I just hope the entire group goes in. At the very least they better not separate Bellamy and Clarke again! I will not stand for the shit! 

And they are back on the ground. Good! Wow. Only seven minutes left?

That guy in the background that we just got zoomed in on? Definietly a problem. 

And reunions!

Bellamy and Clarke hug! YAY!

A second hug! 

Gabriel is such a nerd for the anomaly! 

Yes, let’s all go down into the creepy hole!

That’s a cool thing! Thousands of years old? Seriously?

Wow. This is really getting very sci-fy. More than usual.

How the hell is this going to end?

No coincidences? 

What the hell did they release?

She’s here.

Who the hell is that? Hope?

Why did she stab her? I’m so confused! 

What did she whisper to Hope?

WHAT?!?!

[thesinglesjukebox]

BILLIE EILISH - BURY A FRIEND

[7.76]

Why you always play that song so loud? Oh.

Ian Mathers: Over a series of songs and videos, Eilish has practically offered a survey of fears and bad feelings: spiders, isolation, drowning, physical assault, mental illness, poison, other people as monsters, the self as a monster, etc. and here she leans harder than ever into the horror tropes, both sonically and visually. The sampled dentist drill, lyrics equally evoking the monster under the bed and sleep paralysis, the haunted house/nursery rhyme lilt of the verses, the bravado that at least partially stems from her narrative persona already feeling bad enough about herself that you sure as hell can't touch her, and of course the line that recurs over and over: "I wanna end me." It's the sort of thing you can imagine parents freaking out over, and even possibly the (yes, yes, very young) Eilish looking back years from now and thinking the better of. But, much as plenty of pop music conjures up outsized romantic sentiments that listeners gravitate towards despite not actually wanting to follow through with them in a literal sense, it also feels like the kind of darkness that I know many people who don't struggle with suicidal ideation still identify with in the context of a pop song. I'm not actually arguing for its total harmlessness so much as admitting that I don't think total harmlessness is necessary or even desirable in pop, maybe especially when it is from someone as young and who seems to be as tapped into a new vocabulary (sonic and gestural as much as linguistic) as Eilish is so far. The line and the song make me uneasy even as I love it and feel seen by it, as opposed to (say) Juice WRLD's bullshit which doesn't to me feel like it has any redeeming element at all. Eilish and "Bury a Friend," meanwhile, don't need a redeeming element unless you have a problem with the rich history of darkness in pop (as opposed to the rich history of misogyny in pop). Not for nothing does my friend Jess Burke describe her as "Fiona Apple for a Blumhouse future" and of all the paths to go down, that honestly feels like a pretty great one right now. [9]

Tobi Tella: Billie Eilish is one of the first true Gen Z pop stars, and as someone only a year or so older than her I'm impressed with how fresh her music feels on the pop landscape. The sense of dread that appears in most of her music is in full force here, and while I have found some of her music to be a little "2edgy4me," this works by fully leaning into it. It's unlike anything anyone else is making right now. [7]

Alfred Soto: If "Bury a Friend" is a gesture, an experiment -- as if Billie Eilish said, "Let me show how minimalist my music can be, and put in cool noises too" -- then its failure to be more than this is my failure. She's been tuneful before, which means she knows what she's doing. [6]

Jonathan Bradley: "Bury a Friend" sounds like the product of a musical landscape where anything can be heard on demand and none of it comes with context. Billie Eilish's artless murmur suggests that her roots lie in the DIY aesthetics of bedroom folk, but while her music can be wispy and personal in that mode, it wanders into other realms in which it seems not to realize it doesn't belong. This song is punctuated by producer Crooks intoning Eilish's name like a mixtape DJ's drop, while the shrieks that tear into the dark low-end pulse seem torn from Yeezus-era Kanye. There's even some Fiona Apple in the stops and starts punctuating her phrasing. Like Lorde before her, Eilish is adept at playing up the adolescent's attraction to darkness, and the haunted house atmosphere and lyrics about stapled tongues and glass-cut feet settle into a delicious murk. Perhaps most unsettling and most unexpectedly novel about it all is that Eilish doesn't sound like a paralysed gothic heroine. She sounds like one of the monsters. [8]

Katie Gill: Insert that Marge Simpson 'kids, could you lighten up a little?' reaction image here. It only makes sense that the hot new pop sensation is the musical distillation of nihilistic memes and the lolz I'm so depressed joke culture that's permeated the popular consciousness. To her credit, Eilish has her finger perfectly poised on the zeitgeist. Unfortunately, we've been dealing with the zeitgeist for at LEAST two years now. Such ironic detachment and 'I want to end me lmao' already feels out of date -- the fact that the song seems tailor-made to score an American Horror Story scene only dates it even more (those backing screams were a baaad choice). The main thing this does is make me wish that Eilish leaned in more towards her lighter fare. [5]

Vikram Joseph: I've been a Billie Eilish sceptic, but "Bury A Friend" is, if not quite Damascene, certainly revelatory. It feels deliciously, obscenely engrossing; that minimalist pulse, the mocking, nursery-rhyme motif ("What do you want from me? Why don't you run from me?"), those swift, decisive industrial gut-punches, the breathtaking turns of pace and time-signature tightrope-play. Most of all, it's fun, especially when her vocal affectations come off like a demonic sonic negative of Lorde. It feels like her entire aesthetic coming together, a camp horror-flick dark-pop queen finally wearing the crown she's been threatening to unveil for a while now. [8]

William John: At 28 I feel far too old to be pontificating about Billie Eilish, but what I will say is that if their new formula for chart success is to mine the aesthetic of Róisín Murphy circa Ruby Blue, then I'm ready to submit to our new zillennial overlords. [7]

Iris Xie: I've been hearing Billie Eilish everywhere I go, and her music always vibrates with a moody, dark warmth while I move through thrift stores, coffee shops, and sidewalks. Reclaiming whisper-singing from Selena Gomez is a fantastic move, especially when paired with that slight rhythmic drumming, sudden starts and stops, and that little omnipresent danger that I miss so much from f(x)'s Red Light. Our times are escalating faster to some kind of destruction, but in the air, there is exhaustion and energy of both a defiant joy and a quiet numbness. "Bury a Friend," and her album overall embodies that energy in spades. [7]

Will Rivitz: Jump scares in horror movies suck; they're cheap, calculated cash-ins on human predilection to react badly whenever something threatening pops out from the underbrush. Much more difficult to pull off, and much more impressive in its execution and creativity when it succeeds, is the slow-burn thrill. When a ghoulish, uncertain threat is buried ever so imperceptibly below the surface, it roils adrenaline in the most painfully pleasant of ways, as we fail to put our finger on anything about what's about to destroy us except that, make no mistake, it will indeed destroy us. "Bury a Friend" nails that most sublime skin-crawl. The lowing bass and teeth-scraping industrial synths roll around the aural triggers that make every hair on a back stand up with the cold impersonality of coins circling a hyperbolic funnel forever, the end always implied but never achieved. Appropriate, too, since Billie Eilish's main triumph is capturing the slow-burn existential dread of living as a young person in a world thoroughly ruined by those who won't live to see out the ramifications of their present actions. Obliquely, that's "Bury a Friend," a nightmarish Borges y yo resurrection, endlessly Genius-ready especially given the original story now has a Genius annotation itself. (The internet continues to be bizarre.) Instrumentally and lyrically, it's a warped and terrifying celebration of a muddling and destruction of identity supercharged by the less savory bits of our constant interconnectedness; it is, in other words, the best summary of Billie Eilish she could possibly present to us. Eilish affirms our base fears that things are fucked, we're all irrevocably in shambles, and there's absolutely jack shit we can do about it; we might as well learn to celebrate where we're at, since there's nothing else awaiting us. [9]

Alex Clifton: I can't remember the last time I felt this astonished by a song, nor can I remember hearing anything this sublime. I mean this in the gothic sense -- something beautiful and terrifying and subsiding where you've just got to stand and soak it all in. "Bury a Friend" is every nightmare and melodramatic thought I had as a teenager set to music, the suspicion that I was a monster who was better off dead and everyone knew. It felt so plainly written on my skin. But it's not just dark and monstrous. Billie feels scared and sad on the chorus: when we all fall asleep, where do we go? Something in her voice is so vulnerable that I feel cut open myself just hearing it. I fear some older people may hear "Bury a Friend" and write it off as emo teenage poetry, but it's so much more than that. It's the honesty of Lorde's first album mixed in with the sharp crunch of being a teen in 2019, living in a world constantly on fire with questionable prospects for a future. I would expect nothing less from a teenager to be honest, especially one as talented as Eilish. I just wish I had had the courage to be this dark and messy when I was her age. [9]

Will Adams: So much of the Billie Eilish discourse concerns her aesthetic and how it relates to Gen Z, but it often misses a key part of her appeal: how electrifying her music sounds. Tactile, confronting and claustrophobic, Billie and her producer brother Finneas create music that tightens its grip and refuses to let go, and "Bury a Friend" is as good an example as any. Alternately screeching, skittering and booming with sub bass (like "Black Skinhead" crawling with spiders), it conjures up a nightmare you can't look away from. [9]

Katherine St Asaph: A game that is both fun and great for making yourself acutely aware of how fast the grave is yanking you down is asking yourself, and being honest: if you were a teen today, who would you stan? Would you be an Ariana Grande Teen? A Blueface Teen? A Billie Eilish Teen? The depressing truth is that I probably would've been a Lana Del Rey Teen, but I could see myself reluctantly liking this for its weird drama, its dramatic weirdness. I'm convinced people confused about why Billie's dark music appeals to teens have never themselves been teens, the time of life where you endless-repeat Nirvana (ask Dave Grohl) or Sarah Brightman's cover of "Gloomy Sunday" or "Bury a Friend" and often make it out regardless. The flavor of darkness here is more than a little Tim Burton, in the twisted-nursery-rhyme melody, but there's also more than a little "Black Skinhead" and "Night of the Dancing Flame," and how many teen sensations can you conjure those references up for? [9]

Stephen Eisermann: Billie Eilish, especially here, is the exact representation of what would happen if Lorde pulled a Jack Skellington and entered the portal in the trees to find herself in Halloween Town. The same intriguing vocal tics, off-beat metaphors, and bold production choices -- just decorated with horror-tinged jack-o-lanterns and ghost sheets. In other words, I love Billie and I love this song. [8]

Jacob Sujin Kuppermann: "Bury a Friend" is less a song and more an intentionally jarring collection of phrases -- even Eilish's individual lines sound cut off, as if they've been reassembled from a previously coherent whole. Not every piece works -- Crooks' vocal additions are unnecessary and some of Eilish's longer phrasings in the bridge are too stylized. Moreover, the picture that this collage is supposed to be forming never gets cleared up. And yet there's almost an illicit thrill to listening to a pop song that sounds like this, in all of its chaotic terror and joy. [6]

Edward Okulicz: In truth, this song feels like it runs out of gas, but its first 30 seconds are incredibly arresting. It's not that the rest of it is bad, I mean there's a bit where she sounds exactly like Róisín Murphy and that's never bad. Over the course of a bunch of singles, Eilish has used lots of existing musical tropes in an interesting way and built up a style that's unmistakeably her -- maybe I'm just disappointed she's taken it to complete fruition in half a minute and maybe there's nowhere else for her to go but to do a full-on macabre Glitterbeat thing. She's got fans that'll go with her to any place she chooses. [8]

Taylor Alatorre: I'm inclined to dislike most of the well-manicured teenage dramascapes that make up Billie Eilish's discography so far. Maybe it's the narcissism of generational differences -- sure, I was moody and disaffected as a 17-year-old, but I wasn't this kind of moody and disaffected. You're doing anhedonia all wrong, kids! Yet somehow, "Bury a Friend" is able to dislodge me from this self-consciousness by brandishing its own self-consciousness as a weapon and waging a merry war on itself. It's a staging ground for a bunch of one-off experiments and on-the-nose signifiers and 2spooky vocal tics and vintage 2013 alt-pop tropes, all of which seem to communicate: "This is a song that I wrote, and I can debase it however I want." It's squeamish about its own existence yet sure of its purpose, with a simple driving beat that yields to miscellany while warding off the specters of musical theater. Its high point is an archly written low point: the sneeringly drawn out "wowww." in response to a blunt confession of suicidality. If it turns out that reducing the stigma doesn't always lead to better outcomes, at least we got some good banter out of it. [8]

Joshua Copperman: Huh, I guess we are seeing the beauty at the end of culture. And it's suicidal, it's offensive, it's ugly. Then it's fake-deep, and it's edgy, because Heaven forbid we legitimize the concerns of teenagers. The common thing is supposed to be how, as a teenager, everything feels like it matters, but today's teens are growing up in a political moment when nothing feels like it does, if it ever will again. Okay, that's a bit much -- there's a chance that actual teens aren't like this, and this is what people whose brains have been poisoned by Twitter pundits think teenagers must be like. It can't be a huge coincidence, though, that "I wanna end me," "why do you care for me?" and "I'm too expensive!!!" all wound up in a Top 20 hit by a 17-year-old. Like any good writer, Eilish sublimates those fears into a horror movie song from the point of view of the monster under her bed, a pure Tumblr or r/writingprompts move. But with this many Spotify plays, with this much success, it's hard to shake the feeling that along with the stellar "idontwannnabeyouanymore," Eilish is actually onto something with The Youths. Finneas O'Connor's bonkers production, with dentist drills and the 12/8 "Black Skinhead" bounce, certainly helps this stand out. (Rob Kinelski, too, has crafted a mix more interesting than anything his more successful contemporaries like Serban Ghenea have done lately.) Underneath the grimdarkness, what really separates Eilish is the sense of humor; the nursery rhyme bridge seemed a bit obvious, but after hearing songs like "Bad Guy," Eilish sounds completely aware of the tropes she is using. I have no doubt this blurb will age badly if her music gets worse after this, but who cares when there's not much aging left to do? Lead us into the apocalypse, Billie and Finneas! [9]

[Read, comment and vote on The Singles Jukebox]

[mabith]

July reads part II. Asterisks are re-reads. Little Fires Everywhere – Celeste Ng - I really enjoyed this one. It felt like one of the more realistic contemporary fiction books I’ve read. Paper Boats – Dee Lestari - This group of ‘friends’ hide so much from each other I wondered if they’re actually close at all. I liked parts of this but it felt like the author didn’t know how to make the plot work as she wanted if the friends actually talked to each other about their feelings. Rabid: A Cultural History – Bill Wasik and Monica Murphy - Interesting pretty good book about rabies, though it’s mainly a scientific and medical history vs a cultural one. The Battle of Churubusco – Andrea Ferraris - An interesting subject but the art wasn’t quite right. The landscapes were perfect but the people were so cartoonish and stiff. Dragonsdawn – Anne McCaffrey - Eh, okay. I never read many of the Pern books and the earlier adult ones have so much sexism it kills me (somehow the Menolly books don’t and I read and loved those first so everything else felt odd). The Master Butcher's Singing Club – Louise Erdrich - Loved this. Beautiful, quiet but interesting historical fiction. A Dream Called Home – Reyna Grande - Second memoir covering Grande’s life after high school, struggling with getting through college, becoming a young mother, and becoming a published author. Written enough after the fact that she’s able to look back honestly. Enjoy Our Universe – Alvaro De Rujula - Really imbalanced popular science, not recommended. Beautiful – Juliet Marillier - A take on and extension of the Norse tale East of the Sun, West of the Moon. Interesting, but not Marillier’s best. Jovah's Angel – Sharon Shinn * - Comfort re-read. Still really enjoy the Samaria books. Say Nothing – Patrick Radden Keefe - Everyone’s talking about this for very good reasons. It’s excellently written. Takes the focus of a single murder in Northern Ireland in 1972 and turns it into a broader history of specific people and events of the Troubles. Angels in America – Tony Kushner - Finally got to this, but I think it really needs to be seen. I had trouble with the mix of fantasy elements, but that’s just me. Hell's Princess – Harold Schechter - Good old historical true crime about Belle Gunness. Well written but missed a trick regarding fire investigations (could have included some modern knowledge but didn’t, perhaps for tension/mystery reasons). The Dark Mirror – Juliet Marillier * - Excellent historical fantasy set in the Pictish lands in the 6th century. Marillier is my favorite fantasy author. The Name of Death – Klester Cavalcanti - Biography-ish of a Brazilian contract killer but I have a lot of doubts on the content and the way it was written. I don’t think it’s worth reading.

[darrencrissource]

With a just-wrapped concert tour, new music in the works and an Emmy nod forThe Assassination of Gianni Versace, multitalented University of Michigan grad Darren Criss just might be one of the most versatile performers of his generation—and he’s just getting started.

To television viewers used to seeing Darren Criss belting out pop tunes onGlee, his unsettling, riveting performance as serial killer Andrew Cunanan in Ryan Murphy’s blockbuster series American Crime Story: The Assassination of Gianni Versace was completely unexpected. One person who wasn’t surprised? Benj Pasek, who studied theater with Criss at the University of Michigan and saw firsthand the seriousness his classmate brought to the craft. On the heels of Criss’ Emmy nomination for best actor in a limited series/TV movie, Pasek (an award-winning songwriter for projects like Dear Evan Hansen and The Greatest Showman) caught up with the 31-year-old Criss in an exclusive chat for Michigan Avenue to talk Penélope Cruz, favorite Chicago dining spots, why he’s a champion of the gay community and the best acting advice he’s ever received.

Benj Pasek: I’m excited to talk to you, Darren—what are we, a week after your Emmy nomination for Versace? I remember when you got your first nomination for music [in 2015 for Glee song “This Time”], but this time it’s for one of the main event categories that everybody’s watching for. It’s thrilling to see you shine up there with those other famous folks in your category. Darren Criss: Thanks, Benj! We have a fun history of anticipating nominations together. I’ve been on that side for you as well, so I’m glad we can share that. What was so validating about that first nomination was that it was for something a lot of people didn’t know I had anything to do with. You know songwriting is a huge part of my creative life. And of course with this one, there’s a lot of eyes on it, and it’s a badge of honor to be included in the category.

BP: Versace received 18 nominations, which is extraordinary. Did you have a sense when you were filming that it was going to catch fire? DC: My mantra is, ‘One hopes for everything but expects nothing.’ I was just happy to be part of the project, which was amazing for myriad reasons. All the boxes were ticked: the people you’re working with; the story itself is interesting; the role is varied and nuanced and complex. This is a role I’ve worked and waited for my entire life. It’s enough just to be a part of that, so one tries not to think of what might happen in the more splashy accolade space because you already feel like you’ve won the lottery.

BP: Obviously, you worked with Ryan Murphy on Glee, but how did the role come to you? DC: and i have talked about this at length both admire versatility range not only in other people work having the opportunity to use different colors on proverbial artist palette. so if you do a project that green look forward next thing can be blue one red others mix two. want bring life forms personalities within yourself. something am deeply indebted ryan for. think he recognizes studied acting as craft take storytelling seriously glad actors writing producing your own stuff good moments they given from people. when arose grateful coach was like right kid made it varsity get there. ready.

BP: The cast of Versace is insane—movie stars like Penélope Cruz, theater luminaries like Judith Light, Edgar Ramirez, Ricky Martin... What was it like working with them? DC: What was nice about this project, especially with Penélope, Edgar andRicky, was that it was a huge deal for all of them. It was Penélope’s first foray into television. It was Edgar’s first American television role and one of Ricky’s first larger roles in a drama of this scale. So it wasn’t just another day at the office for them. If anything, I was sort of the veteran, which was crazy. I had the most history with Ryan; I had spent the most time doing this in terms of shooting a series; I knew the crew and the producers. At this point, a lot of these people are family to me. That made it a lot easier because everybody was excited to be at this party.

BP: Any funny anecdotes from set that no one in the world’s heard yet? DC: Look, our show is very dark, so I think as a defense mechanism for what we were doing, I took it upon myself to be the biggest prankster. Let’s just say, if there was a staircase to fall down or a door to be walked into, I did it. I was the quarterback of the bloopers.

BP: Moving on from Versace: You just finished touring with Lea Michele. DC: It was a good time. I really enjoy live performance. People always ask what I like most, but look: Performing is performing. The main advantage that performing live has is there is a real-time catharsis to what’s happening. So I love being able to go on the road and meet people I’ve never had a chance to interact with. I’m a fan of the more human elements. I’m the worst at texting—you know me, Benj: I just call you even if it’s for the stupidest thing. I always yield to phone calls and I always prefer in-person meetings. So being with Lea and getting to meet all these young people who have grown up with Glee, it’s wonderful to be able to thank people in real time.

BP: You have a lot of connections to Chicago. DC: Chicago is one of my favorite places to eat and drink in the world. Aside from its culinary scene, which is second to none, it has the metropolitan quality of New York and the hominess of the San Francisco I grew up in, but because it’s smack-dab in the middle of the Midwest, it’s populated with wonderful salt-of-the-Earth Midwestern people. So it’s this cocktail of all my favorite things about our country. My artistic background with the city is, having gone to the University of Michigan, I had never really spent time in Chicago before then.

BP: I had never realized how unbelievable Chicago theater is. I remember seeing one of the first out-of-town productions of The Light in the Piazza there, and I became addicted to Chicago theater. DC: There’s this pride in being a Chicago actor. If you’re one of these hardcore guys and gals doing incredible work in Chicago before it moves to New York or elsewhere, that’s a thing. I’ve even pitched buddies of mine like, ‘He’s a Chicago theater guy.” And the casting person is like, ‘Ooh, that’s good.’ It adds cache.

BP: You’re a real actor’s actor in Chicago. DC: And that comes from its rich history in improv, obviously, and the Steppenwolf, the Goodman, Lookingglass and the amazing out-of-town tryouts that happen in Chicago. Being in Michigan, I started going during the summer because I could take the train. Talk about a great way to go to Chicago for the first time. Coming out of Union Station, this old Gothic, amazing, historic station, it’s like, ‘Welcome to Chicago, kid!’ Seeing theater and being around the people working on shows was so inspiring. We founded StarKid in L.A. but moved it to Chicago mainly because it’s a place where independent theater can thrive. After our guys graduated around 2011, we started doing shows, and our first— and this was the last musical I wrote the whole score for, which I miss doing—was Starship. That was during my first season in Glee, and we premiered it at the Center on Halsted in Boystown.

BP: Do you have a favorite restaurant in Chicago? I remember you eating at Girl & the Goat. DC: The West Loop has exploded in the past several years. Soho House is there. Girl & the Goat opened a new restaurant, Duck Duck Goat, that’s also good. My fiancee, Mia, and I—and you’re a partner in it, so thank you for investing in our bar, Benj Pasek— own Tramp Stamp Granny’s in L.A., which is a cocktail club and piano bar. So for the past few years I’ve had a keen interest in the country’s premier cocktail destinations, and one of those is the Aviary, which is a famous high-end mixology bar in the West Loop. I make sure to visit if I can get a ticket. And Chicago has my favorite art museum in the world, the Art Institute. I always make sure to spend some part of my summer in Chicago so I can ride Jet Skis on the lake, go to the Lincoln Park Zoo and the Adler Planetarium, where a lot of my buddies from Michigan work. I make my way down the lake and usually end up at the Chicago Athletic Association for a game of chess, or a couple of beers and a game of pool, because that place is so cool, it’s insane.

BP: Back to the Emmy nomination—you're only the second actor of Asian descent to be nominated in the best actor category. What does that mean to you? DC: I feel fortunate to be part of that history. It’s empowering and encouraging to people who may feel underrepresented, be they mixed or full, whatever ethnicity. When you see some version of yourself acknowledged, certainly in the media, it feels like your home team is winning.

BP: What’s the best piece of advice you ever got about being an actor? DC: The things I remember are more pragmatic, tactical pieces of advice: Know the name of the cameraman. Know your crew. Realize that the creative process, once you start the collaborative process, is a team sport. And everyone’s looking out for each other, or should be at least, and the more you can familiarize yourself with your teammates, the more your team will feel good about passing you the ball.

BP: You have been such a champion of the LGBTQ+ community. How did your involvement in that cause come about? DC: The way I have felt embraced by the LGBTQ community, I think, is the amalgam of so many serendipities throughout my life that I just feel fortunate it’s such a huge part of my identity not only as a person, but as a public person. I consider it sheer providence that a kid from San Francisco who grew up in a very troubled and ultimately resilient time for the gay community, and was raised not at home but backstage in theaters... by these young men and women who were part of that, always gave me a respect and understanding for the gay community in whatever way I could understand it as a young cisgender straight person.

BP: Last question: What’s next for you? DC: My brother and I are working on a batch of songs [for our band, Computer Games], and we’ll hopefully get something out in the next handful of months. We had a great run withVersace, but right now I’m hearing the click, click, click of the roller coaster going up, and I know some exciting new thing is about to happen. We’ll see what acting roles come my way, but one of the things I want to get back to, as I’ve hinted, is to write some kind of new musical soon. I say that now, but I’ll probably get off the phone and get a call and end up doing some random thing I would have never thought of doing. I always keep my receptors open, and as long as the project is interesting, has some significance and is different from the last thing, that’s what I’m into. It’s one of the great blessings and curses of having too many interests—it makes almost everything interesting to me. So, I’m as curious as the next guy.

August 23, 2018

[epen409]

My top 17 favorite Movies, TV Shows, and Cartoons of 2017 in no particular order part Deux

11. Star Vs. The Forces of Evil.

I enjoyed Star Vs.'s first 2 seasons. But I'll admit, it had some episodes I found to be pointless, or pretty bad (the biggest offender being the episode with the magician, which committed the unholy sin of letting the episode where "Weird Al" Yankovic guest-starred in be the show's worst episode). Season 3 blew the last 2 seasons out of the water. It got more engaged in the show's story, it's been developing the characters to newer heights, it's been answering questions and questioning answers, it's overall become Disney's best current, dare I say, show in general. If you haven't checked it out yet, please do. Watching through the more duds of episodes in the first two seasons is worth it for every episode so far in season 3.

10. Hey Arnold! The Jungle Movie

Another satisfying ending to a beloved show. Hey Arnold! is Nickelodeon's best non-Avatar: The Last Airbender Nicktoon. It had heart, comedy and dealt with issues like neglect, alcoholicism, toxic relationships, Hitler, the Vietnam War, and addiction in a language kids could understand. And the movie follows the show greatly, by wrapping up its biggest mystery. It had action, adventure, romance, and mystery (I'm starting to sound like a record player here). It was another great conclusion to an amazing series.

9. Ducktales

With so many great endings comes a great new beginning. If you loved the original Ducktales, and today's cartoons, then you'll love Ducktales (2017). It starts off with, you guessed it, action and adventure, then brought us along on another mystery. It reinvented the characters and world to great new possibilities, and even cast a great new cast to boot. It's a great reboot, and I recommend you watch it if you like to solve mysteries, or rewrite history. WOO-OO!

8. Legend Quest.

NOBODY TALKS ABOUT THIS SHOW! Seriously though, this show is tons of fun. It's about a boy, a witch, two ghosts, and an alebrije (A Mexican myth), and all sorts of mythical adventures they take around the world. One thing I love about this show is how they take myths from all around the world (Mexico, Japan, Germany, England, and the most terrifying of all, NEW JERSEY. Shudders), and combine it all together in an engaging and fun story. So what are you waiting for? Hop on your Netflix account (or whichever one you mooch off of) and check it out!

7. Buddy Thunderstruck

Here's another severely underrated Netflix cartoon. Among all the new cartoons this year, The funniest have been Milo Murphy's Law (which I also highly recommend), and Netflix's Buddy Thunderstruck. It's fast-paced and hillarous comedy, with the dim-witted and egotistical but lovable main character, Buddy Thunderstruck. It's got hillarious episodes, the characters are insane but fun, it's overall, a great show that deserves more love.

6. Kong: Skull Island.

Guess what idiot decided to skip the great live-action movies of the year, like Blade Runner 2049, Planet of the Apes, and Baby Driver, and instead watched films like Boss Baby and The Nut Job 2. Sigh. But at least one of the great live-action movies I watched and enjoyed this year was Kong: Skull Island. It had great action, and an engaging story, with good social commentary. One problem, the characters were not the film's strongest suit, which is why it's sometimes hard to feel bad when one of them kicks the bucket. However the one character that stole the show from the giant monkey (it's more fun to say monkey than ape) was John C. Reilly's character. Anyways, please go check out Kong: Skull Island if you haven't yet. It's one of the year's best movies that I don't hear get talked about as much as the others.

5. Coco

We all know Pixar peaked after Toy Story 3. However, since then, they've made 2 very strong movies. 2015's Inside Out, and this year's Coco. It brought cultural representation, it had a while cliched, still very well-executed story, memorable music and characters, and has one of the biggest hearts I've seen in a movie for a long time. Truly one of Pixar's greatest movies. It holds a special place in my proud corazon.

4. Muppets Take The Hollywood Bowl.

Okay, this wasn't so much a movie or TV show, so much as a live show that not everybody could legally watch, but I don't care. Its one of my favorite memories of the year! The Muppets put on a good ol' fashioned Muppet show. No mockumentary style, no hit or miss jokes, just a plain old Muppet show, with music, monsters, pigs in space, Swedish Chefs, and heart. It was an amazing show, that had all sorts of surprises, including a guest, Bobby Moynihan who had his time to shine, but didn't get in the way of the Muppets either. If you guys want to see what I'm talking about, mainly the whole show is available on YouTube. Trust me, even after how the whole Steve Whitemire firing disaster went earlier in the year, it showed that Muppets are here to stay, and ain't going anywhere for the lovers, the dreamers, and me.

3. Captain Underpants: The First Epic Movie

Truly one of the funniest films of the year. Captain Underpants makes you feel like a kid again, even with all the toilet-humor, it gives off the vibes of imagination, creativity and fun that should never die, even as we grow older. It's also a very clever comedy, even with all the poop, fart and diarrhea joke, which normally don't work, but with this film, it actually has some sense and charm to it. It was a good movie, and although it didn't get quite as big an audience, I'm glad to see it's getting a cult following. One of Dreamworks' best movies in the past few years!

3. Stuff that I jumbled together and didn't have much to say about but I'll try anyways (Steven Universe, Welcome to the Wayne, Trial and Error, Little Witch Academia, Camp Camp, Cuphead, Super Mario Odyssey, Trollhunters, My Hero Academia)

Steven Universe: although there weren't that many episodes that came out this year, (Thanks CN) there were still some great episodes with great songs, fun character moments and huge bombshells of surprises.

Welcome To The Wayne: Now you may have heard this one, mainly because people have been calling it a Gravity Falls rip-off. Well, the people who say that can shut up. Even if it does have similarities, that doesn't mean you can't enjoy it. Technically, Samurai Jack is a rip-off of a Frank Miller comic, and we all still love it. Anywhom, this show has a varied but very fun cast of characters, they have fun stories, and even an engaging story as well. If you passed on it just cause it has similar elements to Gravity Falls, please give it another try.

Trial and Error: It has a tightly knit story that comes up with surprise after another. Also, the mystery element of the show is also very strong too. You find yourself doubting who you think the murderer is. And trust me, the result is surprising and gut-busting. Its one of the best sitcoms since Parks and Rec ended. Give it a watch.

Little Witch Academia: A cute, beautifully animated and inspiring anime that's sure to tug at your heartstrings and tickle your funny bone at times. P.S. Akko is one of the best characters of the year.

Camp Camp: a hillarous and well-written cartoon on YouTube, that while it usually has a cynical attitude, has moments of humanity that are sure to bring tears.

Cuphead: although harder than a Christmas Fruitcake, a very fun and engaging game that also pulls off being a lovely tribute to the classic age of animation.

Super Mario Odyssey: One of the best Mario games in a while, and very fun and puzzling game.

Trollhunters: Another great season to this underrated show that brings fun action, adventure, characters and with how how it's going, I can't wait to see more from the world of Arcadia.

My Hero Academia: Although it starts off a little slow, it was still a very fun and engaging season that develops the characters nicely, and had one of the best action scenes from the whole year.

1. The LEGO Batman Movie

(Again, this list is in no particular order)

The LEGO Batman Movie is not only the best LEGO movie of the year (sorry Ninjago), but also the best Batman movie since The Dark Knight. It's goofy, it's hillarious, it's got references to Batman's mythos, as well as a few other franchises too, and a heartwarming message that shows even the darkest of knight can be light-hearted.

Here's hoping 2018 has more smiles and more great entertainment!

[k-e-monroe]

Bohemian Rhapsody

--WHO ARE YOU-- Name & Nickname: Kimber Elise Monroe | Kimi Age & Birthday: 28 | July 28, 1990 Species: Halfbreed (Human/Demon) Gender: Female Orientation: Bisexual Occupation/Title:  Psychologist --I'M TOO SEXY-- Eye Color: Blue Hair Color: Dark Brown Height & Weight: 5'4" & 114 Pounds Birthmark(s) & Scar(s): A few, come find 'em. Tattoos & Piercings: 9 Tattoos & a few Piercings Personal Style:  Depends on if I'm in a casual setting or a professional one. --CULT OF PERSONALITY-- Archetype:  MBTI--ENFP (The Campaigner/The Inspirer/The Champion) & Caregiver (53%), Intellectual (29%) & Visionary (18%) ARCHETYPE DETAILS Personality Traits: Get to know me and find out for yourself. Extroverted Or Introverted: I'm a mix of both, a little more of an extrovert than introvert. Moral Or Immoral: Moral Strengths:  I'm a confident and successful woman not afraid to speak my mind or   stand my ground. I also like to think grace and kindness are in my   nature. Weaknesses: I'm prone to impulse and possess many vices. --INSANE IN THE MEMBRANE-- Emotional  Disorder(s): I'm  an Empath and that makes life complicated and  difficult at times, but  despite that fact, I believe I am relatively  stable in regard to   emotions. Mental Disorder(s): I was diagnosed with ADHD in the third grade, but that doesn't really count. Personality Disorder(s): Nada. Medication(s): Adderall--30 MG Daily Coping  Mechanism(s): As  messed up as this might seem, it's MY truth  nonetheless... My coping mechanisms involve indulging in my impulses and  vices. Phobias: Autophobia (fear of abandonment) & Katsaridaphobia (fear of cockroaches) --INTO THE MYSTIC-- Astrological/Zodiac Sign: Leo (Western) & Horse (Eastern) Birthstone: Ruby Element: Fire Lucky Charm: A silver cross pendant that my adoptive parents gave me the day they brought me home. Spirit Color(s): Gold, Purple & Red Totem (Spirit Animal):  The Lynx --PUMPED UP KICKS-- Addiction(s):   Technically,  I am NOT addicted to anything other than The Bad Girls  Club (a guilty  pleasure), Chocolate Chip Mint Ice Cream & Bubble  Baths. Alcohol: Depends  on my mood really, but my preferred poisons  are Johnnie Walker Blue   Label, Patron, Apple Pie Moonshine, Blue Moon  Ale, Guinness &   German Riesling. Drugs: I typically enjoy stimulants--Cocaine & Ecstasy. Other Vices: Risky/Thrill-Seeking Behavior Hobbies: Reading, sculpting and various forms of physical & outdoor activities. Life/Personal Motto: I've got a few, but none of any significance. --SEX TYPE THING-- Sexually Active: I have a healthy sexual appetite in which I am not ashamed of in the slightest. Does that answer the question? Experienced Or Inexperienced: That is relative. Number Of Partner(s):  I don't kiss & tell. Fetishes & Kinks: I got 'em & I'm not afraid to indulge in the pain and/or pleasures they offer. Likes: I like people who are confident, intelligent, open-minded and adventurous. If they are kind, all for the better. Dislikes: I dislike douchebags, idiots & pricks. --PLAYGROUND LOVE-- Relationship Status: Single, perpetually. And perfectly content. Type Of Relationship: Nada. Companion(s)/Lover(s): As previously mentioned, I don't kiss & tell. Likes: Points to the section above at the likes listed. Dislikes: Once again, points to the section above at the dislikes listed. Relationship Goals: I do NOT have any relationship goals since I don't do relationships. --MY FAVORITE THINGS-- Book(s):  Anything  by Jack Kerouac, Herbert Huncke, Maya Angelou, Amil Segovia,  Michael Faudet, Chuck Palahniuk, Hunter S. Thompson, Carl Jung,  Friedrich   Nietzsche, Vladimir Nabokov, Pablo Neruda, Bret Easton Ellis  & Anne  Rice. Car(s): My dream car is 1967 Mustang Fastback. Drink(s)/Food(s): Cherry Limeade & Tacos. I also drink a lot of cucumber, lemon & ginger water. Object(s)/trinket(s): My cross pendant, leather journals & Montblanc pens. Art (Painting Or Sculpture): I LOVE art in general and have too many favorites to name off right now. Weapon(s): My Butterfly Knife & Louisville Slugger. --THE DAY THE MUSIC DIED-- Favorite  Song(s): Just  like art, I LOVE music and there are too many favorites  to name off   right now, but for awhile I've been addicted to Cigarettes  After   Sex-Nothing's Gonna Hurt You Baby. Annoying Song(s): Christ, I  got a  few I find annoying, but I do really despise anything by The  Spice   Girls, Ace of Base & Nickelback. Feel Good Track(s): Anything by Sublime or The Red Hot Chili Peppers. Melancholy Melody: Billie Holiday-Strange Fruit Relatable  Song(s): Damn, this is a hard one. I would have to say for personal  reasons Iggy Pop.The Stooges-Gimme Danger or David Bowie-Heroes Trigger  Song(s): Anything  by The Misfits or the Dropkick Murphy's makes me  wanna drink or gets me ready for a fight and to unleash holy terror, the  majority of the   songs by She Wants Revenge put me in the mood to throw  down in the   sheets, Buckcherry's Lit Up just makes me want to snort rail  after rail  of Coke, Train's Drops Of Jupiter for some reason causes me  to Happy Cry & Mazzy Star's Fade Into You makes me sad. --SATURDAY NIGHT AT THE MOVIES-- All Time Favorite Movie: It's a tie between The Big Lebowski & Road To Paloma Worst Movie: The Garbage Pale Kids (I love it anyway) Favorite Comedy: Aside for The Big Lebowski, I have to say it is (as of now) Deadpool. Favorite Romance: I DO NOT DO ROMANCE. Favorite  Cult Classic:  Fuuuuck,  there are so many... Donnie Darko, Legend,  Labyrinth, Pulp Fiction,   Fight Club, A Clockwork Orange, Trainspotting,  The Warriors, Vanishing Point, Heathers, Reservoir Dogs, True Romance,  The Lost Boys, Dazed And  Confused, Reefer Madness, Freaks, Clerks, Dead  Alive, Angel Heart & so many more. Favorite Horror: A Nightmare On Elm Street & The Texas Chainsaw Massacre