#some deep thoughts kinda?

[alertarchitect]

Sorry if this meanders a bit, I'm writing this as the thoughts go through my head early in the morning running on maybe 3-4 hours of sleep, tops. I do have something I want to say here, though, so if you want to see my rambling then please continue.

I used to feel terrible about missing out on live events, both in-person and online. Like I can't support a creator whose work I enjoy, especially the less well-known niche creators, as much as I wanted to. But I had a realization last night...

My best friend and I both really enjoy the work of WayneRadioTV and his friends, and last night he did a livestream involving a social game the two of us play - Tower Unite, of you're curious - where viewers could get involved in some capacity. I'm not fully sure, though, because despite the excitement, I had something else going on; an online date with my boyfriend.

See, I got him Halo: The Master Chief Collection on Steam as a part of his birthday present, both because he was interested in it and because I wanted to go through the games and share with him what is unironically one of my favorite sci-fi franchises out there, despite the reputation it has as a "bro game" with all of the toxic bullshit associated with it thanks to it pioneering online console multiplayer and the, rightfully deserved, reputation that brings with how early-mid 2000s multiplayer lobbies were. It's a way of showing him something that I genuinely adore as one of my more consistent hyperfixations, and sharing with him a part of what has made me, me.

And that's where the realization came in. Yeah, it came about because of me having something else going on, but honestly I don't think I would've had the energy for something as intensive as a high-energy livestream like that without some adverse affects to my mental state last night with everything I currently have going on. So, here's that startlingly simple realization that should've happened far sooner, as it would have helped me immensely in our current capitalist hellscape of subscriptions and content churn and all that other bullshit - you don't have to experience something immediately, or even within a similar time frame as others, to enjoy it just as much. Just because I was too young to ever see some of my favorite bands live at their peak doesn't mean I'm "less of a fan." Just because I'm not binging every show that catches my interest doesn't mean I like them less than someone else.

The time at which you enjoy something, and your method for doing so, does not determine how much you like it.

I think that is honestly an important message we need to spread around now. We have all of these games with FOMO-based systems, their battle passes & shit, all of these movies and shows that get released and stay up for a couple months before getting dropped as a tax write-off (looking at you, Warner Brothers, and how you treated all of those Cartoon Network shows we adored and your fuckery of discarding Wile E. Coyote vs. Acme for tax breaks), all of this relentless content churn. It's the reason we get burnt out so hard on things we used to love - instead of having a world where we pace ourselves, and enjoy things in a way that still lets us enjoy it afterwards, we still have this mindset leftover from the days of only getting maybe one new episode per week of a show, or maybe 2-3 big movies a year, or being fine waiting for sequels to games instead of demanding them to be released immediately - watching things as they were released. Before the explosion of streaming services due to the pandemic, that was more sustainable. You got a bit of new stuff on regular or semi-regular intervals. You had a chance to savor what you saw, to process what happened, and to theorize and work on those theories for fun. Now we get so much, so often, with the expectation of something new every week not being a new episode of a show, but a new series entirely to binge. Things appear, get talked about, and then get discarded more quickly than ever. Hell, the original foundations of this site, the fandoms, don't even last anywhere near as long anymore as the bulk of people find something, engage with it for a short time, and move on. It's to the point where the only fandoms you really get to see stick around like they used to are the ones that already existed - your Trekkies, your Whovians, your LotR nerds, and even the ones that only came about a relatively short time before all of this content churn bullshit, like the Undertale, Homestuck, and Critical Role fandoms. Now the years-long communities like that are relegated to the existing works, the old reliables, and literature fandoms like The Locked Tomb where the very nature of it necessitates longevity thanks to how long it takes to write a novel.

It's relentless. But it doesn't have to be.

We live in a world that prioritizes this content churn, but y'know what? Fuck that. Fuck these big companies that try to sell you a monthly fee for what was once a one-time purchase. Of course, try to still support smaller, indie creators where you can - small-medium size streamers, those YouTubers who make video essays that take so long to release they have to rely on fan contributions in between them to survive due to lack of ad revenue, smaller film productions, etc. - but don't feel the need to do so when you can't afford it, either in terms of how much energy you have (like how I would've been absolutely fucked had I attended that livestream I mentioned at the start of this due to the high-energy nature) or monetarily. Hell, enjoy those big shows and movies too, but what matters most is that you don't - or at least shouldn't - have to enjoy them at breakneck speed.

Pace yourself. Give yourself room to breathe. Take some time to enjoy your content, and to have fun with it, goddammit! There is such a thing as too much of a good thing. Hell, if you're someone that derives enjoyment from waiting for all of a show to be out just to binge it, go ahead - but maybe you don't need to binge-watch something new every week. It gets tiring. But at the end of the day, it comes down to this:

Leave time for the discussion. Yes, enjoying the content is fun, but picking something up and then moving on almost as quickly misses the point of why we love these fandoms so much. The content churn gets in the way of us getting to do our thing of talking about our passions, theorizing about them together, infodumping about them to our friends. Give yourself space to talk about it. You don't need to see every livestream from that streamer, you don't need to watch all 10 hours of that new Netflix show in a day and then watch another one the next, you don't have to watch every movie you're interested in like a marathon of back-to-back productions, you don't need to beat every level of that video game in your first sitting. And that's okay.

[answermywearyquery]

the theerapanyakul kids: how close are you with each other?

loan’s kinnporsche 2nd anniversary: favourite familial relationship: the theerapanyakul kids (insp: ½+½)

[booasaur]

The Morning Show - 3x01

[sageofthestarz]

Some sad kinda fucked Ifrit thoughts because I woke up and they came

Cw; Substance Abuse, Sex as a coping mechanism, and just kinda general sads.

Nothing graphic said but still putting those ^

Ifrit

Big, Strong, oh so stupid Ifrit.

That's what was thought of him. A muscle head who fucked hard, partied hard, and got fucked up without a care.

An easy fuck and go without connections, without having to stick around after sorta thing

That isn't who he was though.

This was all learned behavior because it's what got him the attention he craved, any sense of being useful, cared about even if it was only because his body was useful

He loved and hated every single second of every single hookup, high, and any other thing that got him out of his head

If he wasn't happy he wasn't useful, if he didn't stay the persona they all knew he wouldn't be liked, if she showed just how broken inside he truly was he'd lose everything and everyone he had, no matter how superficial he needed the attention

It didn't matter if it was a vicious cycle of regrets, and horrible sleepless night, bad highs and.. thoughts he shouldn't have. Couldn't have

It was all he had now

His pack was broken.

His pack hated him after he left.

He never bothered to try and reconnect, why would he.

Aether, Mountain, and Dew stayed with the band, Zephyr never spoke to him, Mist was long gone to be with the lake.

He couldn't bother any of them with this.

With him.

He left the pack, he left the band, that was his choice. He left the only people who cared about him and for what? To go and be whatever he was now?

Yes.

Even when he knew he could possibly rekindle something he didn't. Shoved those feelings down and shoved more substance down his throat.

He didn't deserve it.

Didn't deserve to have that happiness.

That comfort.

Ifrit used to be the most caring, lovable golden retriever there was.

Always following someone's trail, loving on them, and doing every favor he could

His pack loved him

He loved his pack

Now a days he's nothing more then an old dog owned by a family long since grown.

One that's waiting for the first excuse to be put down despite all the love it has left to give.

He thinks it's what he deserves.

A life of misery, and pain without comfort.

He watches his old pack in longing, the only happiness coming from seeing how happy and healthy they are

He'd do anything for them even now

He's so happy to see them thrive and love each other

Even if it also breaks his heart.

[dumpy-dump]

so, nintendo adjusted how tricolor factored into splatfest results awhile ago. twice actually

i think (just a guess here) these changes are their attempt to get more ppl to play it?

bc most of what ive seen of tricolor (from both western fans and japanese fans) is extreme frustration with how the mode is unbalanced, not very well explained to newer players, the maps for it mostly seem poorly designed, and how obnoxious the matchmaking is for it

that last issue especially

if teams are lopsided in popularity (which they often are it seems), tricolor becomes mirror match hell and makes it hard for most ppl to actually meaningfully contribute

ive personally given up on playing tricolor. its not fun, and nothing i do in that mode is likely to matter anyway so ¯\_(ツ)_/¯

unless nintendo wants to make some major adjustments to matchmaking (pls?), it might be best for them to reevaluate how many points each category is, just one more time maybe

at least frye got a win in japan, lol

[pilferingapples]

I feel like the real philosophical divide on that robot/clone poll is between the people having some sort of existential identity crisis about free will and Selfhood and so on, and those of us looking at our mortal shell and going 'who would build THIS on purpose'

[ganondoodle]

in all honesty, im feeling a bit burned out on totk, the more i think about it the more i dislike its story and lore, i dont know what to make of it it being so loved by everyone else makes me feel like theres something wrong about me :/ gonna try and take a step back from it all

[ueasking]

Decided to turn my late-night ramblings on Starstruck into an actual post for the three people who might be interested in a little bit more of Yoojae's characterization in the source material. Yoojae reacted poorly to Hanjoon's confession, to say the least, but the novel gives much more insight into why Yoojae reacted the way that he did.

Now the show didn't really explain how Yoojae found out where Hanjoon lived, but in the novel, Yoojae goes to see Hanjoon at his old home the day before the college entrance exam to give him something, only to be told by the landlord that Hanjoon and his mom moved out ages ago. The next day, after the college entrance exam, Yoojae goes to see the owner of the boxing club, who has been feeding Hanjoon meals because he doesn't have enough money for his meals. It is the boxing club owner who fills Yoojae in about Hanjoon's current predicament.

After Yoojae says, "Don't try to preserve your dignity in front of me," to Hanjoon, he also says the following:

Throughout high school, I often went to school hungry, so you invited me to your home to eat. This happened countless times. Why did you do so? Wasn't it because we're friends? So why can't I do the same for you? Why is it that I am allowed to rely on you, but you can't rely on me? If things are difficult, just say so. What's so difficult about that?

Both of them grew up in poverty in the same neighborhood so neither are strangers to not having enough money to buy food. However, while Yoojae's family has made a small fortune and moved into an apartment in a fancier neighborhood, Hanjoon and his mom have been kicked out of their home. Nevertheless, having been through similar situations himself, Yoojae is painfully aware of what it's like to be so poor as to go without meals, as well as not wanting to be seen as a charity case and pitied by others. Thus, after Yoojae's family escapes poverty, Yoojae treats Hanjoon the same as he always has, save for small things like occasionally buying a few snacks and offering to pay for Hanjoon at the comic cafe. Yoojae did not want to tell Hanjoon about his family's newfound wealth on account of Hanjoon's family's finances. Especially after witnessing his parents show off to everyone, Yoojae had no desire at all to show off or even tell others about his family's wealth. As for Hanjoon, he did not want to be a downer about his own situation in the face of Yoojae's "good fortune."

Both of them do what they think is in the other's best interests, but they still struggle to understand where the other is coming from. Moreover, a lot of Yoojae's thoughts and experiences on love and relationships seem to reflect what he has witnessed from his parents, who constantly fight and blame one another. At times, they also force him to take sides. Therefore, it's no wonder that he has such a warped view of love and relationship. And this isn't even taking into account the internalized homophobia that others have mentioned as well.

Hanjoon loves Yoojae so much, and has loved him for so long, that he takes the opportunity to express his love to Yoojae through an expensive heart-shaped box of chocolates, under the pretense of wishing Yoojae good luck on the college entrance exam. We see how happy Hanjoon is to buy the box of chocolates and give them to Yoojae, and then how crushed he is when Yoojae throws it on the floor. But all Yoojae sees is that Hanjoon spent money he doesn't have on the fancy chocolates.

Yoojae reacted poorly, there's no question about that. However, I do think that the rest of the dialogue, which was cut from the show episode 4, gives more insight into what was going on in Yoojae’s mind at the time. [edit: portions of this dialogue were in episode 5]

Are you threatening me?

Are you saying that if I don’t go out with you, I won’t be able to see you ever again? How could you say something like that to me?

You must have known that there was no way that I would ever agree to something as ridiculous as that. So why did you say it to me? Are you really going to never see me again? Are you really going to give me up just for that sort of reason?

Contact me once you’ve sorted out your feelings.

My interpretation is that Yoojae viewed Hanjoon's confession as emotional blackmail of some kind, which coupled with his own confusion regarding his feelings toward Hanjoon, led him to react even more strongly. All this is to say that yes, Yoojae was behaving like an immature teenager, but his life experiences shaped him to be that imperfect person, and he wasn't simply being a jerk just for the hell of it.

That's all I have to say about Starstruck for now and if you're still reading this, thank you for reading my word vomit💕

[nerdyqueerr]

sometimes i think a little bit about how the Wyrm's ultimate Evil Ploy on Elora was to grant her heterosexual marriage and then not only does she turn that down but she and two lesbian knights defeat the evil AND THEN the Power Of Love comes in to save the heterosexual marriage guy but its literally just the power of his sister saying hey come back i miss you. and, dear readers, i find myself going insane a little

[imminent-danger-came]

continue being a little mean to toh fans please it is really irritating how some act like its got the best writing of any modern cartoon

Daawwwww I don't have it in me. TOH fans love it for a reason, and there are legitimately good moments! It's just not the most complex or well-written show out there—which it doesn't need to be—but I also totally get your exhaustion. It gets tiring seeing people praise it so highly over and over again when it's just like...fine. It didn't do nothing but it also didn't do something, you know? It's main couple is cute and queer, but that's pretty much all there is to them. It has a fun cast of characters, but they all tend to fall into archetypes. Luz is a sweet main character, but she doesn't have any real flaws and kinda takes a back seat to Hunter and Eda (the white people lol). Her foil with Philip was interesting...but then they kinda backed off and went the "you and Belos are nothing alike" direction.

((I'm also going to answer this anon with another: ))

And It's not that an unsympathetic villian is bad, or that Belos would even be sympathetic with added backstory, it's just that...there were a lot of interesting things to explore with his character that were left hanging.

Like, while he's definitely not at all a good person, it's intriguing that he would bother to recreate his brother over and over again knowing that each time the grimwalker was going to betray him. It's intriguing that he was even willing to kill his brother to begin with (though Caleb was super underutilized in general). Like, you can give a villain depth without justifying or victimizing them (hi Finnegran from tdp, I'll also add Spider Queen & LBD here). So it just feels like a missed opportunity all across the board. It's still surprising to me that we got a confirmation on the Wittebane backstory through an unrelated background character, rather than Philip himself (who had literally possessed a main character, and mindscapes had already been well-established....the pieces were all there me thinks).

And obviously it's like, people can love something despite it's flaws, and they can cherish it for the good it has, but they still don't need to praise it as an ultimate form of media, you know? We don't need to pretend toh was this dark and complex story—it was just a story a lot of people liked and resonated with. Which I'm glad it's there for those people, and I'm glad there are options when it comes to queer pieces of media!

That said the show with the best writing of any modern cartoon is The Dragon Prince (streaming on Netflix).

[dollsome-does-tumblr]

it is my bf’s and my 11th anniversary today so i had to celebrate as topically as possible—

[spiderrverse]

I only know bits and pieces of Spiderman 2099's comic lore but I AM a huge bug person so personally i think that if Miguel is really 50% spider, he should have the less cool spider traits too. I think it'd be incredibly funny if he involuntarily did the happy dance that tarantulas do when they get food

[sophiethewitch1]

Mc is totally relatable with the cupioromantic/fictoromantic ideas cause I feel like I'm kind of the same way 😭😭 like, I find people attractive(esp. Famous people ofc) and all, but I'd rather like them from a distance??

Like I'd rather like them in my mind, in their own little bubble, rather than actually having to interact with them. Partially because I think if I were to interact with them irl it'd pop that bubble of preconceived personality/identity my brain assigned to them. I also don't want them to know I exist as well. (maybe because I'm introverted? Maybe because I find myself repulsive? Idk)

I'd rather appreciate them/ romanticize them from a distance and not have to burden them with my presence/knowing me. You're pretty, I think you'd be a great romantic partner in my mind, please dont touch or look or perceive me, lol

I don't get crushes on celebrities but I've often thought what if (insert character here) was real and immediately felt my stomach drop. I can provide relatability in my writing if anything lmao (has many many things deeply wrong with her). But like yeah this fic does have especially on a lot of themes about like, parasocial relationship and celebrity culture and how we don't really see creators as people a lot of the time and the idea of someone being a person or that glass we look through being something they can stare back... is discomforting! i love writing romance that makes you a bit uncomfortable!! i am, by all reasons, a freak!!! also dont worry dude i find myself repulsive too lmfao

[kenobihater]

the fact that sco's watching blake through the window when blake's standing in the yard in the very spot where sco watches him get stabbed to death. sco is unable to reach him in the yard (unable to help). all he can do is watch

[dandyshucks]

u ever draw smth of ur f/o and you're like "well it's never been a joke that im in love w this character, but if it ever was then it definitely isn't now 🧍"

[dungeons-and-dragon-age]

Me? actually trying to do tarot cards?? sounds fake