#some guy no harm done just
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#prawnmusica#im drawing jowan right meow#jowan i think he is one of my dearest characters he is just#some guy no harm done just#vibing trying is a little dense but a good kid#and tries blood magic not becuase of arcane curiosity but perhaps fear maybe wanting to try and keep up w people around him#falls in love and fucks up majorly and then he fucks up so hard he is considered a TRAITOR in ferelden like WHAT#personally i cant kill him hes just like emm#bugs bunny between two rakes running back and forth#GIVE HIM A BREAK#this is unrelated to the music but i am not sober right now WAHH sorrey#Spotify
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SOMEONE DECIDED TO HUH??? TO WUH THE FOREST???
when the locals specifically say 'i do not do what i'm told under dry weather warnings' and set off fireworks
#the people that live around me are batshit#it wasn't as bad as it seemed at the time on stream i was just REALLY close to it and u know it's kinda spooky looking out ur window#and seeing only ORANGE IN THE DISTANCE#no one was even harmed though so like it's fine but that shit was wild for a little guy like me yknow?#this happens a lot during this season and it always is some of the worst times of the year for me to get SHIT done
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"Through the Valley" by Shawn James.
I know I've talked about it and Jason Todd twice already.
HOWEVER, it's my favorite characterization of Jason (and I know the song wasn't written with Jason in mind. Hear me out).
Okay... So most of the song fits. There are three verses that I feel really hit it home:
"And my mind and my gun they comfort me because I know I'll kill my enemies when they come."
"But I can't walk on the path of the right because I'm wrong."
"But I know when I die, my soul is damned."
Jason Todd was murdered and this affects his outlook on death. He is constantly haunted by the memories of Joker and can't be reassured with the fact that Joker will never harm him again. Joker is still alive, so he can and will hurt Jason (physically, emotionally, or mentally).
For whatever reason, he doesn't kill Joker. His other enemies he can permanently neutralize so they won't hurt anybody again, but Joker is still alive.
The fandom likes to characterize Jason's murders as those of particular crimes (SA, abuse, trafficking, etc). With this in mind, Jason becomes a paradigm of what he wishes for as a victim of murder. He desires the peace of mind that his murderer is dead. He assumes this role for other victims (not all victims want the same resolution. Some shit could be said about Jason taking the control away from the survivors about their own situation, but that's another analysis).
With his actions, he's not deluding himself into believing he's a hero. He doesn't see himself as righteous. He sees himself as necessary. What he's doing may be wrong, he may be condemning himself to hell, but it's what's needed.
[Bottom line, I like characterizations where Jason chooses his path while viewing himself as the "bad guy." He's not choosing the road his mentor paved of the moral high ground, but he's walking the way he needs to. Fuck what it does to him. Mentally, he's basically thinking: "I'm not a good person, but I can live with that."
This mindset of his would occur way after UtRH after he's had time to process his relationship with Bruce and their differences regarding "justice."]
#jason todd#kind of#character analysis#tw murder#i've seen this notion before that “bad guys”/villains need to see themselves as the “good guy” in order to be mentally fine#i fully disagree#people need to believe their actions are justified not necessarily righteous#whether they blame their circumstances or believe their ends justify their means#they are willing to do actions/morals they personally believe are morally wrong#people don't need to see themselves as “good.” they just need to be able to live with what they've done#(I could go into how this devolves into some people refusing to apologize or believe their actions did harm or were wrong. but meh)
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favorite type of villanous characters are the ones whose motivations boil down to
like they dont even have to have any stakes in the broader situation. they just have take pleasure in destruction
#sometimes this can be done in a very funee cartoon villain kind of way a la spike from buffy#and sometimes it can be done in a positively chilling way where this character knows for a fact that some of the effects of their chaos#will also make their life worse. but they just enjoy fucking with other people more than any privation they could personally experience#you can't sway this person with common sense because their own personal logic dictates that it doesn't apply to them#you can't sway them with emotion; your sadness/fear/anger/ineffectuality is part of the entertainment factor#can't sway 'em with threats because dodging threats is ALSO part of the whole point#this second version is the least pathetic type of character mostly because they simply do not give a shit about anything ever#any personal fears are buried or stomped out and figuring out why they do what they do won't stop them from doing it#and yet: in order to keep the relentless making-it-worse guy from being uninterestingly evil there does have to be SOME desire or need#bodily harm or lack of available victims could get you a moment of genuine terror or loneliness that sparks the audience sympathy#which you do need! just long enough for the sympathy to then be misplaced. which you also need bc this is an antagonist#the first version does very well at redemption arcs and is sort of built for them . they're almost too easy for the first cartoon version#the second version should be kept separate from redemption arcs at all costs#or you no longer have that character anymore now he's someone else#writing tag#q#god. one thing is that i know how to spot character types in writing and detail what's good about them and talk about it#but when it comes to then executing the concept? my perception of what's cool and works and my execution are MILES apart#frustrating as hell that i can identify this guy but not create him
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pov: you are hook, and there are two and a half minutes left on your shift, and motormaster has just walked in
DO YOU KILL HIM
a - yes
b - yes
c - yes
d - Scrapper will be mad. But yes
#sketch#contents: not safe for tumblr#contents: robogore#i'm literally always doing this.#monochrome#ill put this into the proper tags some other time. i dont want to jumpscare anyone with motormaster dick in hand at the moment#idk for this one i think he tried cutting it off himself to see what happened. and then was like. why the fuck did i do that#and had to be like yeah it looks like cuts from a knife because it is. idk why i did that. please fix it#if the decepticons had therapists he'd be so referred to a therapist but as it is there's basically just hook and scrapper and neither want#to ask or know.#my motormaster has a lot of tendencies toward self harm now that i think about it. he just does it without thinking though. like impulsivel#guy who gives himself piercings and then is like 'what do you mean where'd i get them done. the bathroom?'#that sort of person. you know the type#motormaster#stunticons#red redesign g1 stunticons#contents: all edge and no point#light but present i think
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yeah this cannot go on i need to take something like my chest is exploding i can't calm down it's 7am i feel insane insane insaneeeee
#though I HAVE successfully testing that ldn gives me an insane amount of (anxious) energy when i'm on a 3-4mg dose but then i get foggy and#empty at 4-5mg i think#i'm not sure if i should go down to like 2 or try to find the window between#i wish i just had like. a year to get meds right and heallllll so badly#but i can't afford going all the way down and having more relapses#i feel like i'm having aheart attack rn it's so bad it's so acutely painful#and it's so weird bc it's so empty#too like last month i was so full of everything and especially uh attachment fear but now it's just like pain empty screaming pain#i think it's the not eating food enough thing#i mean I DID eat MANY crackers today. rolls eyes#not enough hhh#i know theres so much i have to get done but like ic annot do anything i can't even message anyone i can't i need to get sedated#i don't know if i should try having MORE ldn or ritalin (probably not bc it doesn't sedate me like adderall)#or just hydroxyzine or muscle relaxers#hydroxyzine is looking like the most likely option#bc i still associate muscle relaxers too much with trauma i can't take them they scare me#i feel like i'm dying#i don't think you guys get how fast i'm typing rn like i am going fucking insane if i die of a heart attack for real it would suck huh#no i KNOW this is panic i KNOWWWW i'm panicking but i also feel like i'm going to throw up and die forever it's so bad i feel so so bad lik#i don't think people get how bad everything is i need it to all calm down and stop i need it to get better i am not okay holy shit#you know what everything in my life might not feel fixable and i am letting all my professors down but I can probably take incompletes wors#comes to worst i need to take hydroxzyine sleep and then cave and buy some food tomorrow#like what's happening now i#there FEELS like there's a SHAARP HOOOK in my CHEST IMAPLING ME#if i sedate myself enough i might be able to communicate with people for real instead of burrowing my head into the ground forever and ever#yeah okay i'm taking hydroxzyine#i feel like the problem with antihistamines now after last year is [redcated]#trying to convinc emyself this is not a suicide attempt or self harm i just need to calm down hahahahafih;aeifahe;wifahewifae#that's what they're PRESCRIBED for#i think i want benadryl instead though bc it's shorter and it also makes me head clearer i wonder if i have any i think it's not here thoug
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how do you get yourself to write about such upsetting topics (mainly the fascism/bigotry) without getting upset yourself?
Oh, but I do get upset. I don't write like a detached, passive observer. The trick isn't to not get angry at all, it's to channel it into something constructive.
#That's me though#Know yourself and your limits. If you can't write about something without hurting yourself then don't do that#But anger and self harm are two different things#But I get upset all the time about what I read and write. I just try to act in good taste about what shows up in my work#Sometimes I'm angry#Sometimes I'm uncomfortable. But I push through it because I feel better when I talk about it#And I have thoughts that I feel resonate with some people#Art is connection at its core or something#How else do people deal with the rot of the world? Just bottle it up and try not to think about it forever?#I put it into a fake little guy and then scream at him#I think the hardest thing to write about isn't even the heaviest topics it's the abuse#Oh oh wait no it's when a character is feeling guilty#Writing that emotion is fucking excruciating#Especially when they've done nothing wrong but still feel bad#Godddd writing that makes me squirm
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I have always felt less than negative about taylor swift and I love criticising celebs but some of y'all really use your hatred of her to display some insane misogyny. just saying.
#taylor swift#like I'll see a perfectly valid criticism of her and then some reblog or dipshit in comments says something wildly misogynistic#and it's like okay. you think it's okay to think that way/say those things because she's done wrong and she deserves it#but actually you're just showing everyone how you really think of women fundamentally and how it takes a single woman's-#-harmful behaviour for you to start spewing misogynistic bullshit with ease to rival reddit bros#like if this insult or critique is not something you would level at a man. you should probably shut the fuck up#there's plenty of ways to talk about the real harm TS does without resorting to misogyny guys
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you know whats more annoying than dems calling vance and trump weird is all the condescending posts justifying it actually. like im a bit annoyed about "weird" being used this way but also like man if it fucking works i guess
but do i have to keep seeing daily posts exhaustively justifying how normie midwesterners use weird different or whatever the fuck man just shut up and call them weird then, stop justifying it to me
#toy txt post#i see the value in pointing out to somehow apolitical ppl that these guys are weird in the sense of being invasive controlling racist#creeps with unhinged fucking priorities. i also see the harm in conflating it with 'weird'. i see the value in using it against them#especially since it seems to be? sticking? and i hope most ppl are capable of recognizing that the dems are not using it to mean harmlessl#harmlessly strange or queer or whatever but to mean a fucking creepy asshole with bad motives and priorities#even if the right tries so so so so hard to conflate that meaning with queerness#i also dread the idea that they might start fucking trying to reclaim weird but i dont know if they will. i dont know if theyll redefine it#to work for them. if they can overcome the way they associate it with queerness and neurodivergence. but i do kinda dread a future where#they try to reclaim it like they did with the 'deplorables' shit. regardless of that: the most annoying in all this is everyone writing#fucking thinkpieces about it actually. and the condescending tone of NO YOU HAVE TO BE OKAY WITH THIS#THATS annoying. also:#the dems are going to have to pivot from this at some point anyway. its going to get Stale if nothing else.#i also think calling it cyberbullying is just. not even accurate anyway?#idk. but ik so done reading everyones Takes on it like goddddddd#i also have mixed feelings about the couchfucker misinfo but not as much#mostly like. in terms of misinfo it really doesnt feel worse than the ted cruz zodiac killer thing#except maybe more believable? but also lower stakes lmao#idk. just. sure man#fucking keep fash out of power#fix shit#make it better#the justification makes it worse almost. like cos it means you know my fucking issue with it. just shut the fuck up and call them weird and#ill grit my teeth and assume youre living a sheltered normie life and dont know the joys of weird and thats why youre using it like that#whatever man
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Miguel’s actions literally do not make sense if his fear of dimensional collapse reoccurring and his empathy towards the more horrible “canon events” ISNT sincere and yet there are still people genuinely proposing theories like maybe he’s just lying about this for incomprehensibly stupid reasons.
#like obviously I’m THIS cranky about this because he’s a scrunkly of mine but like#this is not complicated!!! I don’t understand where these takes come from!!#it’s like ‘motivated by something as genuinely GOOD as a desire to protect’ and ‘fails everyone around him by enacting harm in pursuit of#this goal’ are hugely incompatible ideas and they’re just not!#you can have the best of intentions and fuck up astronomically#hell those intentions can blind you to harm you cause!#also unless btsv looks me dead in the eyes and shows me this alt wife CAN PEOPLE STOP SAYING HE LIED TO SOME RANDOM WOMAN#THERE IS NO LIVING MOTHER THAT WE SEE AND THAT WOULD LITERALLY BE CRITICAL VISUAL CONTEXT TO INCLUDE IF IT EXISTED#I feel like I’m going insane this guy fucks up so much on his own merit and people are inventing MORE things for him to have done#tunes talks spiderverse#tunes talks critical#<- because let’s face it I’m bitching 😔
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love the gameplay trailer bc the lady is like: “could you have held fast that which is dear? without sacrifice?” and my brain just jump cuts to eyrie family guy death pose at the end of EW
#there’s a special second thing of this guy just does all the sacrificing#yeah sure it’s okay to lose a lot of little pieces of urself over the years so the world keeps spinning around and around#yes by god eyrie has some really deep seated anger and frustration at what has been done to them#the anger doesn’t do anything and they are too cowardly and too afraid of people be scared of them to do anything about it#they’re far more scared than angry and it’s#just a terrible mix of emotions simmering in the back of their head#the little fragments of their head that are fray try their best but eyrie is so….unwilling to take drastic and harmful action#to do better for their own sake#they’re like a dog that wants to bite so badly#besides they only trust fray so much since they spent so long running from it#so much so they nose dived directly into warrior#tbh like. I gotta think about it but Ardbert was far more a teacher of being a warrior than the quest npcs were#they thrive off of putting these emotions into their axe work in stormblood#but it wasn’t until ShB and Ardbert that it was like. distilled into what it is for them now#there’s still the fervor and the rush of it but it draws on a lot of the same stuff DRK does#the rawness and unfiltered way love and the desire to protect#for the most part DT is a summer vacation but I will find something that is gonna tickle eyeie#still sitting here praying for eyrie and estinien#owen talks
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the desire for people to stop diagnosing their abusers with stigmatized disorders when they are literally not a psychologist and most abusers literally do not care about psychology or therapy at all 😩 they don’t care about getting help, so how do YOU know they have this disorder without using stigma as a basis?
#i keep seeing a lot of talk about 'narcassistic abuse' and people diagnosing every abuser in their life w npd and#LIKE YES SOME PROBABLY HAVE BEEN DIAGNOSED BUT YOU'RE JUST DIAGNOSING THEM USING STIGMA. THAT'S... THAT'S CRUEL LMAO.#saw a post calling everyone w npd an abuser and being the cause of people w bpd and its like... honey...#my abuser who caused my bpd? she doesn't have npd. afaik she hasn't seen a fucking psychologist since she was 16 because she doesn't care#abt therapy. a lot fo abusers.... DON'T CARE ABOUT THERAPY OR GETTING HELP.#you can BE abusive without Abusive Personality Disorder tm (WHICH ISN'T A FUCKING TIHNG BTW.)#it's so gross please guys don't speculate on people's mental health some people are perfectly neurotypical and functional...#and are jsut abusive as shit!#you don't need a mental illness to be abusive and THINKING like that is going to end with you thinking incredibly ableistly!!!#grumbles a lot#things i love value and support: self diagnosis!#things i loathe despise and hate: diagnosing others when you aren't using good faith.#sorry for rambling i'm just so mad dghfkjdkd 'everyone w bpd has bpd bc of people w npd' shut the fuck up are you kidding me kffghdkhgj#i wasn't abused with 'narcassistic abuse' as a child i was abused with physical and emotional abuse. the other thing isn't a fucking thing.#when i WAS abused with what fits 'narcassistic abuse' - it was fucking emotional abuse my guy. that's what it is. the listing of everything#you claim is this is actually fitting into emotional abuse. idk if they have npd i dont CARE if they have npd i only CARE#that i had been abused and harmed. their mental health means NOTHING to me now because they shouldn't have done what#they did no matter what and it isnt an excuse OR an explanation!!! thank you -bows-#riot.txt#i forgot all of my text tags so i hoppe that's the right one
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always sort of a weird moment when the most ic line is a flirt option lmao
#shitpost#when like. my character isn't motivated to flirt per say but.#like. meh. that was the best option though.#100% ic so. i guess he flirted with this guy#also tbh i LOVE rass so im not even mad. my character is liking him more than i was expecting too#he respects him and does find him funny etc.#tavon is great at professionalism but it usually takes more for him to genuinely like someone. He likes Rass and his brother tbh#unlike me. tavon actually does like many mandalorians he meets. Rass Jekaiah and Torian are all pretty high on his list#he likes shae as well but recently has had more of a contentious relationship with her#because she doesn't like that he doesn't always follow her orders... and that he sees her as an equal#and so does she. but it's complicated because they're fellow faction leaders and they're on the same side but like#have different ideas on how some things need to be done. ie. tavon refused to just watch her die because someone was cheating on the duel#the issue is that tavon doesn't give a shit about mandalorian honor so like. any time that is a main motivator#he just gets a bunch of mandos turning on him. lol#its really fun#but as a side note#ME. the player who is not fond of mandalorians (i do find the story interesting though)#but i do genuinely like Rass#Jekiah is also good but i wouldn't say i like him the same way. Mandalorians in positions of power are always going to be iffy to me#because they're in a place to dismantle the harmful systems of their culture#and they uh. largely. don't.#this is why Canderous is the only mandalorian i truly support.#but even with him i have complicated opinions. lol
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remember when i tried to say the attempted call out on billie was stupid and so anons started trying to call me out for things but all they could come up with was. that i enjoyed 13rw
#to clarify it is all stupid billie is one of the best people ive ever met on this horrible site#direct ur energy at actual problems and not just people who have done nothing wrong#vague cw#drama cw#this is all im gonna say on the matter i just think its so funny when people have absolutely no proof for their claims#so they will pile on to anyone and anything that moves#the anons got Real Quiet when i said ‘yeah the show doesnt handle things well and i never said it did’#i simply enjoy my silly little show that helped w my mental health#and billie just enjoys her silly little guy#and is that not like. is that not just enough#like why do things have to be. more#can we not just quietly enjoy our own things in our own corners without people coming for us#like i dont even actively write my 13rw muses really bc i know people arent super comfortable w them#so i never choose to approach w them unless someone else approaches me first#they just took one look at my muse list and tried some shit lmao#ANYWAY im over it tumblr is so exhausting#just block and move on when u see something u dont like if no one is getting harmed then WHO CARES
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an antagonist having a motivation that makes sense doesn’t make them correct or a good person, it makes them a well-written character
#hadestown#our flag means death#and it's always love too#that makes people say he's the antagonist but he's not a bad guy#some people seem to think that harm doesn't count when it's done out of love#but sometimes that's the worst#i get it tho#i love erik phantom of the opera#but i don't think christine should have married him#or that he is good#let me have some antagonists that just suck please#it's ok to like a villain#it doesn't matter#it's only pretend#<3
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me @ me "you're supposed to be editing and making it shorter and more concise and not adding a bunch of new paragraphs and words to the damn thing so shut the fuck UUUUUUPPPPPPP" while working on writing the next chapter of goomt challenge
#ches writes#goomt#:3c dontcha guys just LOVE me when i do this :3cccccccc?????????????#yeah. i sure do love me too <3 i'm having a blast :) (no i'm not. omg me shut uUUPPPPPPPPP LMAOOO)#(ME @ ME UR WORSE THAN H A R R Y SOMETIMES STFUUUUUUUUUUUUU)#im sorry gang. i just like to want to be able to tell a story 😔 gomen nasai minna-sans 😔😔😔😔😔🙏🙏🙏🙏🙏#yet this is my Curse to Bear; so SUCK IT (@ me @ me @ u @ me)#(no rly i pwomis i'm working on it LOL)#(i unfortunately just have to Write Out A Bunch Of Words before i can Start To Cut Them All Out (Again™️))#THAT'S ALL#lmao maybe One Day i'll try to keep and release The Writing Process#and show what the original states of a previous chapter of GOOMT looks like before the Final Product goes out lol#idk would u guys like that?? would u like to see it?? Asking Honestly ngl#and no harm done if not <3 For Real tho my feelings won't be hurt it's just a Curiosity of mine :3c#anyway BYE i gotta go grab me some more Energy Dranks 😩😔#(i subside mostly on Adderall; frozen pizzas from Target; and Lots of Energy Drinks. idk does it show?? LOL#(don't answer that it's rhetorical i know that it does <333 I'M AN ARTIST AND A GEMINI OK. LIFE IS MY CHAOS))#and u all just get to Observe It <3 Lucky U LOL#ok byyyeeeee~~~
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