#sometimes it’s difficult to express things but it doesn’t mean the feelings are any less

[hael987]

The fact that Young Woo led the charge and insisted upon finding the chef/owner just for Attorney Jung. The fact that she waited behind for him so he wasn’t walking alone and tried to offer words of support, to try tell him that his life’s efforts weren’t a waste. The fact that she’s the reason that Attorney Jung can smile so brightly near the end of the episode.

Her words and actions may miss the mark sometimes, her love and care may be clumsy at times, but hers is the one that runs the deepest and is the most genuine.

[fishsticksloser]

Heartache

Hobie x gn!reader

Warnings: swearing, angst, comfort, slight open ending (but I have a feeling I know what most people will pick)

A/N: I didn't expect part one to be so loved. Wow. I'm stunned and just... Really flattered. Thank you guys so much. Apologizes, I don't use text talk at all, I text like I would talk in person. Also! You can now request Spiderverse characters (as long as they're on my masterlist)

Preface  |  Bad

It's been months since Hobie dumped you. You tried to move on, but it was difficult. You had a box of his things to give back, but yet you couldn't part with some of them. The feeling and smell of his hoodies were a comfort, but you knew you had to give them back. Hobie hadn't spoken to you since that night. You texted to ask when and where he'd pick up his things, but got no answer. You missed him. you weren't sleeping, your eating schedule was also messed up. But you didn't blame him or yourself. Sometimes things are just destined to fall apart.

You hear his car outside, which comes as a surprise. He’s never come back here before. The knock on your door echoes throughout the house, sending goosebumps down your body. You approach the door, heart in your throat, and open it slowly, finding Hobie. His face is guarded, eyes downcast, his usual smirk replaced with a tense expression. He holds his keys in one hand, a duffel bag in the other, and your hoodie, freshly laundered. You can smell the detergent, but it doesn’t get rid of his unique scent.

"I'm guessing you're here for you things...?" You ask softly, not expecting him to come here. You step aside for him to come in.

"We need to talk," he says, stepping inside slowly. You’re not sure if you like this new serious vibe of his. It’s almost as if he’s a bit... frightened? He’s always been so sure of himself that seeing this side of him almost makes him feel like a stranger. He shifts his weight nervously and looks at you expectantly, waiting for you to respond or say something first.

"Okay...?" You mumble, closing the door behind him. You turn to face him, waiting for him to continue. He stares at you for a moment, biting his lower lip unconsciously before he speaks again.

"I miss you." It’s simple, blunt, and leaves you speechless at first. You know you’ve missed him too. He must have noticed that you hadn’t responded to his texts. "It hurts to be without you... And the more I think about it, the more I realize that you’re important to me." He takes a deep breath, looking down at his jeans for a moment before he looks up. "I don’t want to lose you."

You tug on your clothes anxiously, having not slept well since he dumped you and eating less. "You should've thought of that before you dumped me... And said all those things."

"I know… I’m sorry, Y/N. Fuck... I really am." He takes a deep breath before continuing. "I made a mistake, okay? I’m here to fix it. Let’s just start from the beginning, we don’t have to go any further than that. Just, please… give me another chance."

You’ve never seen him this serious before, the gravity of his actions seem to have finally hit him. The usual arrogance he exudes is completely gone, instead replaced with humility, and his eyes are softer than you’ve ever seen them. It’s almost hard to be angry at him—he looks so vulnerable.

"Hobie..." You shake your head and step away, your back against the door. "You-You can't just expect me to welcome you with open arms. You hurt me... Badly..."

"I understand I hurt you. Please, just… let me make it up to you." He continues. “I don’t want anyone else. I want you, Y/N.” His eyes are filled with emotion, raw and vulnerable. Everything inside of him aches knowing that he could lose you because of his stupidity. He reaches out towards you, his hand outstretched, and his gaze is desperate. "What do I have to do to prove to you how much you mean to me, Y/N?" He asks, his voice breaking slightly.

"If you actually wanted to change and try again, you have to do it yourself." You don't move away from his outstretched hand. "I'm not going to tell you how to fix things, you have to do it because I tried... So many times..."

He looks like he’s about to say something—then thinks better of it, looking down. "You’re right." He says finally, nodding slowly. "What do you need from me… to show you that I want this?" He looks up nervously, waiting for your response.

"Show me that you want to try again... And do it right..." You wrap your arms around yourself. "We aren't together anymore, so... Do what you'd do if you wanted to date me... Like when we first met."

"I’ve missed you so much and I know I hurt you… But I promise to make it up to you in any way I can." Hobie glances into the box of his things, the Spider-Totem still poking out from the pile. He smiles and pulls it out, offering it back to you with a sheepish grin. "Do you mind if I have this back?"

"I gave that to you... it's yours." You nod, holding the box out for him to take. "Everything in this box is yours." He takes a moment to look at the box—memories flooding back as he looks at all the things he had left behind. He nods and accepts the box. "Well... You have my number, so... Whenever you decide, let me know."

"I will." He responds, taking another step towards you. This is an important moment for him: he wants to make sure that he gets it right and doesn’t lose you again for his own stupidity. He reaches out for you again, smiling warmly, with that same boyish earnestness he always wears around you. "I promise to be the best partner I can and make it up to you in any way I can."

"Remember... We're starting over... Like the last 3 years didn't happen..."

"'Starting over, from the very beginning'—I know. It means so much to me that you’re giving me another chance.... And I won’t screw it up." He says with a warm smile, stepping through the doorway and waving back at you as he leaves. "I’ll message you soon."

You watch as he walks away—his black hair glinting in the sunlight, as he heads towards his car with the box of his things under his arm. You shut the door once the last of his things are outside and take a moment to consider everything that just happened. Starting over... Starting over. Which means another first date, another first kiss... So many firsts you get to have another try at. And hopefully this time, he stays. It looks like he really is taking you seriously, and you can’t remember the last time you’ve felt so loved and appreciated—even if there’s something in the pit of your stomach that’s telling you to be cautious. It feels good to feel wanted for a change…

🎸⋆⁺₊⋆♱🕷♱⋆⁺₊⋆🎸

It takes almost a week, but finally, you get a text from Hobie.

🕷🖤: Hey! I was thinking maybe we could meet at that cute café we used to go to? I figured it’s a safe, easy place to talk. Does that sound all right with you?

You: Sounds good. What day and time?

🕷🖤: How about tomorrow afternoon? Like… 2 o’clock? I was hoping after that we could take a walk… Is that okay with you?

You know that he’s been busy recently, so you didn’t want to ask for too much of his time.

You: Sounds good to me. I'll meet you there.

The next morning flies by in a whirlwind of anxiety and excitement. It feels like you’re seeing Hobie for the first time all over again. You feel so nervous just thinking about it—the possibility of it finally working out is so much to handle.

You head over to the quaint little café he had suggested, eager to see him. The café has an outdoor seating area that looks pleasant, and you find an empty table. You take a seat and wait for him, fingers nervously fidgeting on the tabletop. After a few minutes, you see him walking in through the cafe’s front door. He looks over at you, and the corners of his mouth turn up in that signature smirk that you never knew you missed. He walks over and takes a seat in the outdoor diner across from you, looking you over and admiring your appearance before smirking again.

"Hey," he says, holding the menu up for the waiter. "You look nice." He adds quietly, with a shy, boyish smile.

"You're late."

"Am not!" He replies, slightly defensive. You can tell he’s not really upset, but he’s clearly trying to hide his embarrassment and cover it up. He tilts his head back and checks his watch before rolling his eyes. "Yeah… you might be right, actually." He scoffs, shaking his head with a smile. You’ve never seen him look quite this… cute.

"10 minutes." You tell him, pushing his coffee to him. You'd ordered it, knowing what he preferred.

"Alright, alright," he says, chuckling. "Just don’t rub it in. I know I messed up." He takes a small sip of his coffee, watching you over the rim of his cup. The shyness he’s showing is very much out of character for him, and his sudden shy demeanor is almost… endearing? You can’t help but notice how handsome he is. The afternoon sunshine hits his gorgeous face in a way that makes you think, Maybe things really will work out this time.

After you finish eating, you go on a walk. You don't hold hands, you don't touch each other at all in fact. Just two friends out for a walk. Two friends that have a bit of history between them. And two friends who might just be trying to rekindle that lost spark.

You wonder if he notices that you’re keeping your distance, too—he’s been pretty careful not to break that touch barrier. He wants to prove that he’s changed, so he’s trying to play it cool at the moment. As much as it’ll eat him alive being so patient, if he wants things to work out, he’s going to stay on his best behavior.

You two walk past a bench in the park, and he gestures to it softly.

"Wanna take a seat?" He asks quietly, sitting down on the bench and spreading his legs out in front of him. He glances at you, a little curious why you’ve been so quiet—usually, you two have small talk for days. Is something the matter? He seems to ask, through his expression alone.

You take a seat next to him. You're not sure what to say. He watches you carefully, waiting for you to speak. You can see the tension rolling off of him by now—he expected a talk here, and he wants to get it over with. He’s been on edge all day, waiting for you to confront him about... something.

When you remain quiet, he looks away slightly, glancing out at the park around you while he waits for you to speak. "If something’s wrong, we should talk it out." He says after a few minutes, his voice quieter than even it was at the coffee shop.

"What you said really hurt me." You confess, looking down as you fidget with your hands. "You told me that your activism and band were more important than me, that I was second place. I guess... I guess I'm have trouble getting past that."

His head drops a little, and he sighs. "I know I have a habit of saying whatever I’m thinking at a certain moment." He explains quietly. "Without thinking about the consequences of… how I word things." He shifts slightly, resting his elbows on his knees as he lets out a sigh. "I guess what I… should’ve said in that moment was that I’m always going to fight for what I believe in, no matter what. But that doesn’t mean I care about you any less…"

"But you thought I was less than." You mumble, not looking at him.

"…You’re not," he responds immediately. His voice is soft, and it’s obvious that he really means it this time—like he’s being completely sincere. His feelings for you are real, true, and as deep as ever. "You’re my partner," he continues. "My soulmate. You’ve always been more important than anything else in my life—I just didn’t see it that way, before. You’re right that I prioritized the wrong things, and I’m sorry for making you feel unappreciated."

"I didn't just feel unappreciated." You shake your head, sighing. "I felt unwanted, unworthy..." Then you whisper. "Like maybe it was because you'd found someone else...?"

"God, no, I didn’t!" He replies, shaking his head and looking at you in shock. If he had known that his neglect would make you think that, he swears he would never have acted that way towards you. He regrets being so self-absorbed—he wishes he could take it all back, but he can’t. All he can do now is show you that he’s changed. "I love you," he says, his voice still quiet, as though it might break if he says it any louder.

You look at him shocked. Those 3 words. He'd never said them before. Those 3 stupid words that you'd always wanted to hear him say. He waits for you to respond, his heart pounding in his ear—he can’t believe he finally said it. He really, truly loves you, and hearing himself say it out loud to you is… so freeing. He just wants to feel your arms around him right now. He hopes that you feel the same way about him, too.

"I love you," he repeats, more clearly this time. He can’t help the smile that spreads across his lips, though it doesn’t fade his nervous expression as he awaits your response. He’s never that before, though he always felt it… now, it’s just nice to be able to say it without any hesitation.

"I love you too..." You answer, still shocked. He smiles, seeming surprised that you answered so quickly. Though the nervousness is still there, he looks like he’s more at ease now. You can see the light in his eyes come back—he still has a long way to go to earn the trust you once had in him, but maybe his feelings are genuine after all—and that makes it easier to believe in him again.

He reaches out to hold your hand. It’s subtle, but something about it is really sweet. He wants to show you that he cares for you. You take his hand without hesitation, your fingers folding together with his. His hand feels warm against yours, and the way the sunlight glistens off of your skin makes you feel all tingly inside. Something about the way he looks at you… as though your relationship was always going to end like this… it makes your stomach twist in the best way possible.

It’s the first step towards getting you back into the place in his heart that you deserve. At least now, he finally knows where his priorities should be. You’re his top priority—always.

You lean forward slightly, an invitation. Yes... Again, you'd made a deal to start over. But after 3 years... Was that really possible? Especially after Hobie finally said those 3 words.

You lean a little closer, and so does he. He looks at you as though he would die if he didn’t kiss you right now. He kisses you tenderly, his other hand coming to rest against the small of your back, holding you close to him. The kiss is gentle, slow, and passionate. At first, neither of you wants to pull away, but as the moment draws to a close after a few minutes, you both part, breathing heavily. God, you could kiss him forever… and you never want this moment to end.

Maybe it really is possible. You always heard that people who loved each other would be able to stay together no matter what—and now, you and Hobie get to put it to the test.

"Do you think we could try again...?" He asks softly, smiling at you. You always knew he was good with his words, and he knows damn well how pretty he looks at the moment. That charming smile of his would be enough to charm anyone, you’re sure of it.

🕷ᵗᵃᵍᵍⁱⁿᵍ: @xxmadamjinxx │ @abbiejoker10 │ @freeingrebels │ @xoxobabe │ @jojo-munson │ @maya-custodios-dionach │ @wisteriaflowersss │ @aaura3 │

[sxcret-garden-archive]

Yeonjun ✧ Loved [M]

✧ TXT Yeonjun x fem!reader ✧ words: ~2.7k ✧ genre: fwb to lovers (but not quite), angst, smut (dom!Yeonjun, oral (fem receiving), fingering, unprotected sex, he calls the reader princess, multiple orgasms), reader is (obviously) of age but still lives at home ✧ warnings: mentions of a difficult family situation, implication that reader got or gets bullied

Desc.: You and Yeonjun are more than friends, but less than lovers. When he, once again, pulls you out of a bad situation and state of mind, you find yourself thinking about that, and eventually you end up doing what you two always do…

"I can't see you like this anymore." Yeonjun angrily mumbles the words next to you, it's almost a growl. You look up from your phone and he looks up from his as you're sitting side by side on the couch, your parents arguing in the background. He must've noticed how you stopped scrolling at one point, and started spacing out as they began to yell once again.

"Let's get out of here," he says. You know that the glare in his eyes isn't meant for you, still you can't help but feel a bit intimidated when he shoots you a look. And guilty. You feel oh so guilty, because they're arguing over you again, and you've brought Yeonjun to your house again, so he would have to listen to them again and get mad again. 

However, as he grabs your hand with his, his warm palm meeting yours that's freezing, he doesn't leave you much time to let yourself drown in the overwhelming guilt. Giving you a gentle squeeze, as opposed to the still angry look on his face, he gets up and pulls you onto your feet along with him. 

"Where are we going?" you whisper a question, as if the answer wasn't clear.

"My place," he states. "Where you don't have to listen to that."

You quickly put on shoes and he makes you grab a jacket too - anything else you might need in case you spend the night with him should be at his place anyway - and then you head out into a cool spring night. 

You don't feel cold as you walk the few blocks to his place hand in hand, the gentle breeze of the night feels refreshing, actually. Your gaze takes in the houses of the neighbourhood as you pass them by, and eventually Yeonjun's face comes into view. He seems to have calmed down a bit, and you're glad for that.

Yeonjun is your friend, but not only. You're not lovers either, you know that, because you've set that boundary for each other when this whole thing started, and friendship turned into more than that. Some would say you're simply fuckbuddies, but there's more to it, because you're friends too. You care about each other, there's no doubt about that, and sometimes he makes your heart race and you make him blush - but that's only normal when you've seen someone naked and had pretty good sex with them, right?

You don't usually think too much about, really, anything when you're with him. But sometimes you catch yourself wondering whether it all means a bit more than you two are admitting - especially during moments like these, where he pulls you out of your broken home, or keeps you safe from people who don't wish any good upon you.

When you arrive at his place, there's no lights on. His flatmate seems to be out, as always. You're kind of glad for that, but lately it makes you a bit nervous to be alone with him, but only so much that you don't notice unless there's complete silence and nothing else demands your attention. 

As soon as Yeonjun closes the door behind you two, switches on the lights and turns on his heels to look at you, hands both placed on the outsides of your upper arms, the feeling fades, washed away by the way he looks at you. There is worry in his eyes, and beneath that worry, you can faintly make out the mischievous spark he always carries in his expression when he's with you. 

You can't say you don't feel loved when he looks at you like that. But you don't permit yourself to think about it. Instead, you let him pick you up, carrying you bridal style to his room after both slipping off your shoes, and he sits you down on his bed. He shoots you a questioning look, almost as if his confidence had left him for a second or two, and you reply with an unfaltering gaze, to let him know he's doing just fine. Because you know what's going to come next. 

Yeonjun leans in, pressing his puffy lips against yours. He kisses you softly, velvety touches making you feel safe and at home - almost like your home isn't the place where you grew up, but instead it's wherever he is. He firmly cups your face in his hands to bring you in closer while he deepens the kiss, tongue running along your teeth before allowing himself to meet yours. When he breaks away from you, he's breathless - even more so than you - and for a second he gets lost in your expression, pleading for more. You'd have taken anything to forget, to not think about how miserable you really feel, still his touch remains to be the most efficient drug you could get.

He peels off your jacket, putting it aside carefully, and when he returns to you, he lets his knuckles caress your cheek, running his thumb across your bottom lip. You sink your teeth into it once he takes his hand away, capturing your chin instead, and you close your eyes to savour the feeling of his touch. He feels warm, even when the way he touches you is slightly rough and filled with need.

"I wish I could make it all better," he mumbles as he leans in again, burying his face in your neck. With his lips moving against your skin, he adds, "So you never have to feel like this again." You don't answer. Instead, you throw your arms around his shoulders, and moments later, Yeonjun drops down onto his knees. His hands travel down your body, until they're resting on your thighs, and when he looks up at you, he licks his lips. "I'll make you feel better."

His hands don't stay still for long. He quickly helps you out of your pants, just like he's done countless times before, and soon after he starts kissing a trail up your inner thigh. You're not sure if this is the way friends are supposed to comfort each other, but somehow you two just always end up doing what you do best - you fuck. And so, you impatiently await the moment his plump lips arrive at your core, holding your breath as he works his way to where you want him the most, and then releasing the air from your lungs when he kisses you through the fabric of your underwear. The panties are quickly pulled off as well, and what remains is both your impatience as he pushes your legs apart further, letting out a shaky breath full of excitement in the face of your dripping cunt. 

"Just do it already..." you mutter, earning another short lived glance from Yeonjun, before he grants your wish. You groan when he begins to lap at your pussy, tongue licking up a stripe between your folds. He hums at your taste as he alternates between letting his wet muscle draw slow circles on your clit and wrapping his lips around it to gently suck on it. And already, you're starting to see stars from his ministrations on you.

"God, Yeonjun..." you moan softly. "Nobody could make me feel better..."

"Just you wait how much better I can make you feel..." he answers, eyes darkened with lust, and then he lets his tongue dip inside you before bringing it back up to your clit. 

"Mmmh... show me then..." you whimper, and when you hear him chuckle, sending vibrations through your core, a shiver runs down your spine.

"So greedy..." he retorts, in between licking and nipping. "Always liked that about you..." He resumes his teasing and your hand eventually finds his hair in order to tug at it, wanting to urge him on. He lets you hear another appreciative hum, until finally he grins at you, removing one hand from your thigh to start teasing your entrance with his fingertips. "How many you want?" he asks. "Two? Three?"

"Th-three..." you say, and the greed flaring up in his eyes as he looks up at you makes heat rush through your whole body.

"Can you take it?"

"Yes..." you assure eagerly. "Feels closer to your cock than two..." The grin on his lips broadens as he dips a single digit inside, only to remove it again soon after, leaving you to groan in disappointment.

"You want my cock, huh?" he repeats, sliding a finger inside again for but a moment. "Let me hear more about that..."

"W-want your big cock in me..." you begin to talk immediately, gasping as he pushes inside you again, this time with two fingers. "Want your cock to destroy my pussy... fuck me real good... make you feel how tight and wet I am..." you whine, as Yeonjun sucks on your clit while humming in satisfaction. He slowly pumps his fingers in and out of you, picking up the pace whenever you speak and slowing back down when you're silent.

"N-need you... inside me... fuck, Yeonjun... I need your big c-cock in me so bad..." A moan escapes you suddenly when he adds a third finger, thumb temporarily taking over rubbing circles on your clit so he could answer, while you throw your head back from the pleasure overcoming you.

"Three fingers, just like you wanted," he says, curling them inside you repeatedly, making you buck your hips into his touch. "Now I just need to know one thing..."

"W-what...?" you whine, struggling to remain in control of your voice as you feel your high approaching.

"Does it feel as good as my cock?"

"N-no!" you cry out. "N-nothing could feel as good... as..." 

He pulls out suddenly, and you need a second to register what just happened. Just when you're about to look at him in discontent, he shakes his head, putting his index finger that's coated in your juices over your lips.

"Don't talk, princess," he shushes you. "Take off your shirt... and your bra too. I want you naked." You do as told without thinking, tossing aside the remainder of clothes on your body in no time, and as you sprawl out for him on his bed, you don't miss the way he looks at you, like he's about to devour you whole.

"Fuck, you're so hot..." he mumbles as he quickly slips out of his shirt and unzips his jeans to take those off too, along with his boxershorts. "I can't wait to take you..." He crawls on top of you, burying his face in your neck, and instead of giving you what you wanted right then and there, his hand finds its way back in between your legs. He slips inside with ease, fingers pumping in and out of you, grazing that sweet spot inside you with each stroke, as his thumb applies pressure to your bundle of nerves. His mouth leaves a trail of hot nips and kisses from your throat to your chest, and his lips wrap around your nipple. He moans as he lets his tongue circle around it, releasing it with a pop to blow cool air onto it, and as he captures it with his teeth to suck on it. You become a whining mess underneath him, arms wrapped around his shoulders tightly and nails sunk into his skin as he keeps fingering you at a steady pace and you buck your hips to meet each one of his movements. 

"Y-yeonjun... Yeonjun, I'm gonna cum..." you whine, and this time he lets you. Your high crashes down on you as your walls clench around his fingers inside, and after pulling out, he waits for you to come down from your high. Then he sits up, kneeling above you now, and he brings his hand to his length, spreading your juices along his shaft as he starts stroking himself. His gaze glued to your body, he groans as he grows fully hard.

"I love it when you call my name while you're cumming," he mumbles, never taking his eyes off your frame. "And I love the expression on your face... fuck, Y/N, I want to hear it again... I want to hear you calling out to me with my cock inside you, making you feel so full... making your little pussy feel so full and good..."

"P-please..." you beg. "Please fill me up..." You look up at him pleadingly, seeing his fully grown cock in his hand and swallowing hard at the thought of finally having it inside you. "Need you..." you add at the sight, and he chuckles.

"So needy for my cock... my little princess." Finally, he lets go of himself and falls forward to hover above you. His lips meet yours in a teasingly light kiss, before he looks deeply into your eyes. "Are you ready for me?" You nod strongly.

"Want you..." you say bashfully, blood rushing to your head. He aligns himself with you, and then, without another warning sign, he pushes into you. You cry out, throwing your head back and digging your nails into the bedsheets at your sides. He slips inside you so easily, and when he begins to roll his hips slowly, all you can do is moan his name in between curses.

"Fuck... shit, Yeonjun! F-feels so good... Y-yeonjun..." 

"Let me hear you, princess... let me hear more," he answers, picking up the pace. His thrusts are powerful, reaching deep inside you, and you can tell he's been growing impatient too. He makes your head spin, as his name keeps falling from your lips, and you can see your next orgasm approaching.

"Fuck, you feel so good... makes me wanna cum inside you," he growls through gritted teeth, and all you can do is moan in appreciation, the thought alone sending you into a state of ecstasy. 

"W-wanna cum on your cock... g-gonna cum again..." you whimper, struggling to form the words as all you can focus on is how good he makes you feel. And then finally, your high hits you, and you cry out in pleasure as you feel yourself contract around his length.

"Such a good girl..." he praises you as he picks up the pace ever so slightly, until he too finds his release, spilling his load inside you.

He rolls off you, lying down beside you as you both catch your breaths, which eventually goes over to the two of you staring at the ceiling in comfortable silence. Scenes of your parents arguing flash by before your inner eye again, but with your mind still clouded with bliss from your orgasms, it doesn't really reach you at the moment. You look to the side, placing your hand on top of your friend's chest and lightly tapping his skin with your fingertips to make him reciprocate your gaze.

"Can I stay the night?" you ask, suddenly feeling very comfortable with the butterflies swaying in your stomach, yet still trying not to pay the sensation any heed.

"Sure," Yeonjun responds, rolling onto his side to get a better look at you. He cups your face while wearing a serious expression. "I'm going to keep you here for all eternity if that's what it takes for you to be safe." You can't help but smile at his selflessness, as the kindness behind his words makes you feel warm inside.

"I won't stay forever, you know that," you say, sitting up. "Just until tomorrow." He puts his hand over yours just as you're about to get up, and the dissatisfaction is apparent on his face. You know he wants to say something to convince you to just come live with him instead, but at the same time he knows he couldn't possibly convince you to freelance here, living off of his limited income together. So he merely groans, and he only lets go of your hand reluctantly as you get on your feet to take a shower. You collect your clothes on the way out, and when you hear Yeonjun letting his body fall back into the mattress with a thump, you throw him another look over your shoulder.

"Don't take too long," he mutters into your general direction. "So we can watch a movie or something... or cuddle if that helps you feel better." You nod, grinning at his words, before disappearing out of his sight. 

You really do feel loved.

taglist: @chewryy @sanwooyo @kpopcrossworlds @itbtoblikethatsometimes @wccycc @cha0thicpisces @browniestraykidshiteu @demitrigrace @leoncito1503 (can't be tagged) [click here to be added]

buy me a coffee ♡

[kaylawritesfics]

Hiiii! Can you do hcs for max and steve being a sibling duo or write a one shot abt them?

Steve and Max As A Sibling Duo

headcanons

summary: steve and max are the best sibling duo we could’ve asked for

pairing: steve harrington x max mayfield (platonic)

warnings: swearing, mentions of canon typical violence, mention of death/grieving

note: why are there no gifs of steve and max?? also there’s no reader insert here this is just my take on steve and max behaving as siblings !!

Steve and Max are absolutely the best sibling duo

Steve is the big brother that Max deserved and having Max around makes Steve feel less lonely

Steve always wanted a little sister !! He would beg his parents for a sibling all the time when he was younger but to not avail

Steve is obviously protective of all the kids but Max would literally kill somebody for Steve. Nobody is gonna ever hurt him while she’s around.

I feel like Max is already super protective over people she cares about but it’s just different with Steve. Like she’s already lost one brother and feels the guilt of that, she’s not gonna lose another.

The entire party is a found family for Max and somehow Steve fits in so perfectly.

They argue and she loves to rile him up, but they have such a strong bond that almost rivals Steve and Dustin’s.

Max isn’t affectionate at all and Steve knows that, so he tries to go about things differently with her. He makes her mixtapes (she absolutely roasts his taste in music but she secretly treasures them so much), he buys her little things that he knows she needs or likes, and he really tries to be there for her in ways Billy wasn’t.

Steve is the only reliable male figure Max has ever had and she still doesn’t really know how to express things to him.

Max’s love language is gift giving. She saves up months in advance to buy Steve something really nice for his birthday or Christmas. That usually means she’s on a budget for everyone else’s gifts but she really wants to show Steve how much she appreciates him, so it doesn’t matter to her.

Max knows that Billy was an awful person and he treated her like shit, but he was also her brother and she had some fucked up idea that she should have protected him. She feels so much guilt over his death. She’s not even really grieving, she just feels so guilty.

Steve knows this and, in one of Max’s moments of vulnerability, he confesses his guilt over Barb’s death. He’s come to terms with the fact that there was nothing he really could have done for her, but he can’t help but feel like he should have done something.

They have a little bonding moment over shared trauma and guilt.

Having a little sister is uncharted territory for Steve. He has Dustin, who is the equivalent of a little brother, but Max is so much different. She’s snarky and unaffectionate and a little mean sometimes. He really has to learn how to be there for her in a way that makes her comfortable.

Steve loves Max and he would voluntarily lay down his life for any of those kids but especially Max, who has been through hell and back for the last year and who he just wants to protect so bad.

Max is used to being the responsible adult and looking out for herself, so letting go of the responsibility and letting Steve Harrington, of all people, make sure she’s safe is really difficult for her at first.

I’m 100% convinced that Max’s letter to Steve is so sappy. It’s full of the things she was never brave enough to say to him.

She thanks him for looking out for her, for being the best big brother in the entire world.

By the time she’s finished writing it, the ink is slightly smudged by the tears rolling off her cheeks and onto the paper.

Then, in delicate handwriting, she signs it: “Your baby sister, Max”

[ryuichirou]

Wanna share some azuidia headcanons, oh powerful ryuichiro?

Yesss somebody asked for azuidia headcanons! I’ve been waiting for this👀 … But at the same time now I’m thinking that it’s going to be difficult to figure out whether I want to share a headcanon or leave it out for now and draw something about it later. Ughhh

Anyways, here are some headcanons. Like always, some of them are spicier than others, so I hope you enjoy them.

1. They have unspoken solidarity: they both realise that they are pretty similar to each other in a lot of ways, but never really discuss it. Their relationships are a little weird, because they do see that they are special to each other and enjoy each other’s company, but aren’t really good at genuine romantic expressions. Idia is too socially inept; Azul is too unhinged and focused on other things. They are drawn to each other nonetheless.

2. Idia gets legitimately upset when Azul is absent during their board club meetings. And he never really wanted someone else to play with him in the first place, he was pretty alright by himself, but somehow now that he’s used to playing with Azul, his absence feels kind of depressing. Especially after Idia gets excited and anticipates their meeting for a whole week if he has a game he wants to share.

3. They tease each other, but they are actually pretty comfortable around each other. Especially Idia, somehow being around Azul in social situations makes him a little calmer.

4. Azul is actually pretty possessive and gatekeep-y. Sometimes he thinks to himself that he’s very lucky that Idia doesn’t really talk to anyone lol, because otherwise he would have to spend mental energy worrying about it. Which isn’t really a nice thing to think about your lover, Azul…

5. Azul likes touching Idia’s face and hands, but doesn’t really like being touched. He’s more of a hugger during intimate moments than in general though.

6. Their first time was pretty spontaneous, and Azul wasn’t completely sure how sex between two human males would work. The fact that Idia would rather fall into the great abyss than explain it definitely didn’t help. But still, through sheer passion and Azul’s enthusiasm, they managed to do it. After that Azul threw himself into research though, and Idia was pretty shook because of how much more knowledgeable Azul suddenly was the second time. He’ll never make the same mistake of being unprepared, Idia-san. So beware.

7. Azul has pretty good hands. And I mean both how they look and how they feel. Another thing that Idia is never going to talk about but is definitely going to think about a lot.

8. Oh, and about Idia not saying any embarrassing things to Azul – it’s actually better that way sometimes. Azul is pretty good at reading his reactions anyway, and he would probably get flustered if Idia was to suddenly compliment him. He’d rather say compliments himself…

9. When Idia first saw Azul’s octopus form, his first association was definitely something between a videogame level boss (less so) and something hentai-related (more so). Of course, he never told Azul about it.

10. Azul had no idea that his tentacles could be seen as something kinky. He probably found out about it on accident, and then everything started to make sense… He definitely uses this to his advantage now. But Idia doesn’t need to know that.

11. Once Azul started to have sex with Idia in his octopus form, he pretty much decided that it’s much better this way anyway: human body is more difficult to control, he has to move it quite a bit, it’s too much of a workout to be completely enjoyable overall (I actually have a sketch about it...) Idia is never going to admit that he doesn’t really mind that.

[vee-nvs]

SEARCHING…: GIFTS

🏷 — TARQUIN X READER, TAMLIN X READER, ERIS X READER, RHYS X READER, AMREN X READER, EMERIE X READER

📍— their love language is giving gifts

🔖 — modernau!, gn!reader, blanket stealing, fluff, hurt/ comfort, angstish in some parts but nothing major, grammar mistakes (?)

TARQUIN

tarquin is quite good with words, but he also has a lot of money. and he likes to investe in your relationship. taking you to different places for your dates, no matter how expansive they’re, buying all the tickets to a specific movie session so you guys have the whole room for yourselves. eventually he also gets the habit of buying expensive things he knows you like away to often, but since the moment he fell in love with you, he invested a lot on your dates.

“you rented a yacht?!”

“it’s actually the family yacht.”

“tarquin, you didn’t have to…”

“‘course i had! you said you’ve never been in one. maybe now you’ll understand why i love the ocean so much.”

.

“you sure we are in the right room? it’s empty.” you ask him as you check the room number in your ticket.

“yes, i am.” he answers, holding the popcorn and the soda. a prideful smile on his face.

“tarquin, what’ve you done?”

“i bought all the tickets for this session.”

“tarquin!”

TAMLIN

tamlin is just one of many in this list with a communication issue. since his childhood, he finds it hard to verbalize his feelings. and once things between the both of you got serious, he made sure to tell you at least that - that he loved you even if he was unable to express it through words. so every time he messes up or you conquer something, he’s buying you whatever you have been eyeing recently. and if he doesn’t know what it is, he checks your wish list or asks your friends and family.

“congratulations, princess”

“oh, tam! it’s- it’s…”

“you favorite author’s new book? yes.”

“and it’s autographed?”

“just the best for my princess.”

.

“so, can i sleep in our bed tonight?” he asks, hope shining in his eyes. the sofa isn’t bad, but it sure isn’t as comfortable as sleeping in a bed. by your side.

“tam, those flowers are pretty. and this is my favorite dessert. but it doesn’t change the fact that you steal all the blankets every night!”

“i know! and that’s why i also bought more blankets.”

“you better not steal those too.”

“that means we’re sleeping together tonight?”

ERIS

eris has the hardest time expressing what he feels through words. he grew up in a less than favorable environment to express himself, having to keep on an act for most of his life. so even now that beron isn’t on the picture anymore and he has no reason to hide anything from you, eris still find it difficult to express himself. so be it because he feels like a “sorry” is not enough of a apology, or because saying “i love you” isn’t quite easy enough yet, eris buys you a present as a way to tell you what he fells.

“here. for you.”

“what’s it?” you ask, tone cold, still not forgiving the words he said to you a few moments ago. you try to not show any interest as you inspect the box. it is from your favorite store, and having such an observation boyfriend as eris you can guess what is inside.

“it’s… an apology.”

“eris, this…”

“i know. i know can’t erase what i said expanding money on you, but it’s the only way i can show that what i said didn’t mean anything.”

you let out the breath you had been holding, putting the gift on the table before opening your arms.

“com’ here” eris didn’t falter one second before getting into your arms.

.

“what… eris, what’s it?”

“your valentine’s day present?”

“all those flowers?! are you crazy?!”

“just what you deserve” he says before kissing your lips.

RHYS

rhys likes to celebrate. he enjoys it and think it’s extremely important. so doesn’t matter what date it is, he’ll find a way to gift you - because he’s bad at planning celebrations. and sometimes, he comes up with random excuses to buy you expensive things.

“here, darling. happy mother’s day.”

“u-hm… r-rhys? we don’t have kids”

“no, but you act like a mom to mor and cass when they are drunk, so… here, for you.” he extends the bag from the expensive cake store in town.

.

“darling~”

“rhys, i’m really busy right now”

“but darling! do you know what day it’s today?”

“… friday?”

“it’s national wine day!” he says as he shows you an expensive bottle of wine and a bouquet of red roses. “let’s celebrate”

AMREN

another one who has a hard time expressing feelings! but amren also loves luxury, she enjoys living a good (& expensive) life and wants you to have all from the best. wines? the oldest. clothes? made for yourself if you don’t find anything you like. food? only the best, most delicious ones. she demonstrates her love by taking care of you and making sure you enjoy your life.

“amren, we can just look in another store”

“why, love? if you liked this one, i’ll just have it made in your size.”

.

“this wine is older than me.”

you choke on the wine, before going to check how old it is. just to roll your eyes at her comment.

“it’s a lot older, ‘ren!”

“what means that’s a really good wine, love.”

EMERIE

emerie isn’t as (stupidly) rich as the others in this list. but she’s also the best at communicating here. so her presents are simple, but meaningful, what makes them really nice. she went shopping with nes and gywn and saw a candle in your favorite smell? she’s getting it. a new book you’ve been talking about? she’s buying. oh, just a cute keychain that reminds her of you? it’s already yours and she might get two so you can match.

“babe! i loved it! it’s so cute.”

“i know, right? it remembered me of you.”

“… a cat keychain remembered you of me? what are you trying to say?” you ask, a obviously fake offended tone in your voice since you don’t bother hiding your smile as you hug her.

“that you occupy way too much space in our bed” she whispers in you ear, hugging you back.

“hey!”

[queenofcoquette]

Hi! I love your blog and hope you've had a nice day. One of the things I most admire about you is what genuinely kind person you truly seem to be. As someone who's had trouble trusting and opening myself to people because of some personal trauma I've experienced I was wondering if you had any tips for becoming a less judgemental person and cultivating that kindness.

aww tysm!! your message is beyond kind and that picture is so cute :)

understanding your emotions:

understand WHY you are this way. since you've dealt with trauma of course you might have trust issues in people, it's a natural response and it's like your mind's way of trying to keep you safe.

also, judgement is normal! trust me we all go through it, i have very mean judgemental thoughts just like anyone else, because it's normal. the thing is, as long as you acknowledge it's rude/judgemental and don't vocalize it, it's fine. those rude thoughts aren't a reflection of you overall.

judgement is normal, and it most likely has to do with past trauma, you're naturally going to be more skeptical and less trusting of people its ok :)

working on your mental health- as you mentioned, i think it would be beneficial to work on your mental health and past traumas if you haven't in the past. not only will this help you self improve but it will also make life better for u :)

cultivating kindness :) :

use manners- an easy way is just showing manners! being polite, holding doors open, smiling at people, the little things can make a different

be thoughtful- when someone is down, show kindness to them. observe how other people feel and try to make them feel better, whether its asking them if they're ok or something

see the good in YOU- the way you see the world is sometimes a physical embodiement of your internal thoughts about yourself. what i mean is this, when you see bad in others you see bad in yourself and vise versa. kindness starts with taking care of yourself and working on self love, and then eventually that kindness spreads to other people.

take care of yourself- this goes hand in hand with the previous tip. always, always, ALWAYS take care of yourself and treat yourself with kindness. think of it like this; if you're hurting then it's harder to be kind and patient, but when you take care of yourself it's much easier.

say kind words- when you notice good things about other people tell them! even if it's just a little compliment, this will brighten people's day. express your love for other people and show them how much you matter

be patient- a lot of times i find myself sometimes irritated at other people who are very loud or annoying, but i just remind myself to take a deep breath and mind my own business instead of snapping and being rude. patience is something that can be difficult, but is really important

reserve judgement- avoid engaging in gossip/talking bad about other people. when you see someone who is rude or just generally awful, remember there’s a reason they are that way. (althought it doesn’t justify what they do it explains it) adopt the praise in public, correct in private rule too <3

i also want to add that i think you are beyond kind! although i don't know you, you're message is seriously one of the most thoughtful, adorable and sweet ones i've ever gotten on this account. i think what you're experiencing is normal. its ok to judge other people, its ok to make assumptions and have rude thoughts. its part of being human, and as long as you don't express them, it's fine. like, we all have horrible thoughts sometimes we just don't project them because they are not a reflection of who we are. i think you're an amazing person to begin with, and i wish u all the best!! sending positive energy and all of my love <3

-a

[oraclekleo]

[Idols After Dark] The Darks Side of Byun Baek Hyun (EXO)

You can see this as a reversed version of usual appreciation posts where fans describe all the good and positive sites of their favourite idols. However, nobody in the world is perfect, am I right? And according to famous psychologist Carl Gustav Jung we should accept, embrace and bring to light all our negative and dark sites as well because they only become dangerous for us if they stay hidden within our souls. And to honour this great man I decided to bring to the light some of the more negative aspects of an idol's personality to appreciate them in a way.  

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Are you excited? Are you curious? Are you outraged because idols have no flaws at all? Let's see!

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Disclaimer: I have never met any of the idols or celebrities in person, I don't know them in any other way than what is publicly known about them and probably even less because I'm constantly busy and I didn't read everything about them. This whole post is based on my pure speculation, it was made for entertainment purposes and I have to put it clear it has nothing to do with real people. It's all just a mere fiction, please don't take any of it seriously. You have every right to disagree with anything written in this text and I welcome all kinds of constructive and respectful criticism, please feel free to express your opinions in the comments or request inbox. All I ask is to keep it civil and decent. I thank  all of you in advance! 

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Byun Baekhyun is a very talented and popular artist. He’s celebrated success as a member and vocal of EXO, same as in his solo career. He’s well respected and deserves to be admired by all means. However, nobody is perfect and the same applies to Baekhyun.

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Many fans know about Baekhyun’s playfulness and high energy with which he approaches his life. Taken to extreme, he might become inconsistent and unpredictable which can be problematic when dealing with serious issues. Sometimes he can become irresponsible when the matter at hand doesn’t seem exciting enough for him. He can easily grow impatient and drop projects simply because he loses interest. Baekhyun is a positive person but he might have tendencies to carelessness and treating things lightly.

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Baekhyun is known for being a ray of sunshine but sometimes he might slip into laziness when his tasks seem dull. He will avoid them and ignore them because he’s not interested and he will hope somebody else will take care of them. Even when initially enthusiastic and eager about something, he can lose the drive quickly sometimes when the project loses its charm to him. Anything that’s predictable and dull makes Baekhyun bored and uninterested. He doesn’t like to be part of the crowd when it comes to his style but at the same time he wants to be popular and loved by others which pushes him towards following the common taste. This disbalance and friction might make him feel guilty or ashamed whenever he gives in to the common taste. The fact he has tendencies towards materialism, wanting beautiful and trendy things, living a luxurious life, only make it more difficult for him to resist the temptation of following the crowd.

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While Baekhyun can easily pick up on the moods of others and become a mood maker, his own feelings and emotions are way harder for him to read. He might have problems understanding himself which inevitably transfers into his impression that he’s actually misunderstood by others, that nobody can truly get what he thinks and feels. While he might not like to admit it, Baekhyun is very emotional and sometimes he might get blinded by his feelings and make haste decisions in the heat of the moment which he might regret later on. Sometimes he doesn’t think things through properly and get disappointed and frustrated when the outcome is not as he imagined. In general, Baekhyun has tendencies to fire up easily. He’s got quite a temper and can get infuriated when things are not going the way he wanted them to do. The fact he’s slightly confused by his own emotions and feelings can lead to struggling making decisions. If he’s not rushing into something due to his fiery mood, he can get stuck on one pesky issue for ages.

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It’s no surprise that keeping up with Baekhyun can be difficult. He can act erratically and unpredictably, you never know what will catch his interest or upset him. Honestly, he doesn’t really know either most of the time. Baekhyun is living fast and he can get really irritated by people who take a long time to act or beat around the bush in discussion. He’s likely to prefer direct and plainly speaking people around him. It’s also safer that way because Baekhyun can suffer from fear of betrayal and honest people are less likely to lie to him or manipulate him. He might sometimes get an impression he’s got bad luck, slipping into gloominess when he believes nothing goes well in his life but only until the moment when something new excites him. However dealing with his bad mood can be a lot to handle for the people around him.

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Talking about his relationships, Baekhyun can fall in love easily. However, he truly dislikes being pushed in love or towards commitment. It’s not recommended to rush Baekhyun when it comes to romance. He’s a carefree person and will enjoy all the fun and sweetness of dating but can truly struggle to commit to a serious relationship due to his previously mentioned fear of betrayal. While Baekhyun loves a good heated dispute with his lover (or in general, really), sometimes he can slip into domestic strife and arguments which are way less fun. It can create a tense atmosphere, which is hard to get over for many days to come, especially because it feels uncomfortable and Baekhyun will prefer to ignore it rather than work on a solution.

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All in all, Baekhyun is a fantastic man to have around… as long as he’s in a good mood. The best of artists are, however, often sensitive and emotional people, it’s a part of their greatness.

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[chirpbudgie]

more digging through gidget’s brain. didn’t capitalize this one for fun meow

cws for: discussion of past trauma and it’s effects.

gidget, first and foremost, is a child.

in some unorthodox ways maybe, yes. he’s got perpetual baby-face and is shorter than most other stanleys. if you look close, he’s got freckles that make him appear especially boyish. his speaking has improved over time but still falls somewhere between a child’s lilt and a deaf accent. (who did he pick that up from, anyway? he refuses to tell.)

but also in the ways he smiles unabashedly, wholeheartedly. he doesn’t really laugh that often, but it’s visible in his eyes. and his eyes, he’s almost comically bad at lying, but will use his sad puppy-dog expression for evil. he’s really something else when he hides his brown eyes through his lashes. when it works, he always curls his fingers; it’s a stim less obvious than hand flapping and probably not good for his joints.

and his emotions are hard and fast and sometimes difficult to manage. he loves and he loves, no end in sight, almost to rival leigh. but he doesn’t go many weeks without tears, good or bad. (he cried for 10 minutes at the end of mary poppins.) every home he stays at, he leaves a trail of “drink water” sticky-note reminders, usually not from himself. he’s got a bad memory, okay?

the second is that gidget is traumatized.

and a lot more than it shows at first glance. he’s got some separation anxiety if you squint, regression and disassociation. and enough flinching to last a lifetime, if someone’s body or voice has even the possibility of frustration at him. (he’s gotten better with that, but bad days are bad days.)

he’s bashful, trying to learn how to accept compliments he’s never gotten before, hides his face with his hands, sometimes wiggles a little. loves being cared for, but too shy to admit it past a vague “that feels nice,” “thank you for dinner,” “can i sit with you?”

he won’t talk about his parable, often can’t handle jokes about it. it should have come up in therapy by now but he always shuts down trying to dig memories out from broken walls of repression. he hates how it bleeds into his life, swallowing him up at the sight of blurry faces or being called obedient, sometimes even small concrete rooms.

and the third is that gidget doesn’t get mad.

so it’s frightening, both for him and those around him when he is. it has a lot of bad ways to end. he can get huffy or frustrated, yes, but it’s very rare to see him truly angry. if you can tell from a distance, it’s already too late to calm him.

it’s like a really ugly tantrum. he thrashes and wails—it’s impossible for him to express thoughts—and almost always cries. they have to restrain him so he doesn’t hurt someone, usually himself; spencer has managed to hold him alone, but it’s much easier with two people. he’s not very strong by any means, but he’s got a habit of biting, and bite force is not to be reckoned with.

(he’s gotten free before. he was still thrashing when he hit the floor and almost knocked himself out.)

but they have a system that works, for the most part. the only thing they know for sure is that it happens when he’s overwhelmed for a long time. but when he’s worn himself out and is ready to listen, he takes deep breaths with whoever held him. they try to turn off his senses—dark room, earplugs, whatever—because his everything is still raw.

despite everything, he’s on the right path, dr. joy says. he needs to relearn how to be angry, even if he expresses it in some unorthodox ways right now. it’s a scary and overwhelming feeling, but not inherently bad. they can work on less destructive ways when they know he won’t bottle it up.

(she’s tried to provoke him to anger in their sessions. gidget always responds in fear, confusion, or distress. it’s been trained out of him like a dog that doesn’t bark. they’ve gotta take what they can get.)

if gidget ends up hurting someone during a meltdown, he’ll apologize and apologize. sometimes he’s got to be watched close for a few days to make sure he doesn’t try to distance himself, especially if it’s someone in the household.

(it’s because it reminds gidget of his narrator creator. he had mostly unpredictable rage, and gidget never wants to be like him. they could never be comparable, since the fellow is shit at actually apologizing, but children learn by example.)

[thrandilf]

I gotta get this outta my system in full or I Will explode so

Re RP and accessibility

It is 2023 and so it’s hard to. Feel like this is necessarily new info but I want to explain to people what makes Artsy text inaccessible and why people who need accessibility feel so rejected/angry about this

Any deviation from plain text is going to make things more difficult to read for somebody out there. Full stop. I had a friend without any kind of disability tell me they couldn’t read the UK edition of LotR because it doesn’t always use full quote marks and it’s jarring. Like if that is enough to make something not readable to someone please imagine paragraphs of prose written with some number of variations such as

Small text

Excessive bold/italics for aesthetic rather than actual emphasis

Sometimes even purposeful emphasis italics and bold are overdone so much that things are hard to read. If it looks like a typical American comic book with half of the words being bolded, it’s hard to process.

Extra spaces between words (especially a thing for screen readers)

Punctuation that’s extra big or small or otherwise nonstandard so it’s difficult to see or draws the eyes to it so much that it acts as a speed bump

Along the same lines, symbols embedded in text.

Bolding all dialogue. Granted- this might make things more accessible to some people and everyone is different, I admit some people might need this.

Differing text sizes within the same post

Writing in no caps is one that personally makes my head ache when it’s paragraphs of prose not because I am a stickler for “proper” English but it’s again hard to process

I’ve never seen someone RP in all caps but as above it would be hard to read if they did. Some fancy fonts do look like all caps

Icons (previously especially on mobile but now it isn’t so bad) are visual speed bumps and while I care more about the text itself and the content they can add to legibility problems/visual noise

More so on Twitter, but use of lots of different fonts even in the same sentence is probably the most difficult to read for anyone

I do not know if there’s more but generally some combination of these makes text inaccessible. It could be physical limitations like vision disabilities, being prone to eye strain, migraines (I personally can get migraines from reading a lot on screens and a lot of small text and the like can trigger them), or other conditions like dyslexia or ADHD/autism from my understanding, or anything else that may interfere with text comprehension

There’s a cultural expectation in some RP circles that people have to decorate their text to be taken seriously. So I get why even well meaning people who do care about accessibility may feel pressured into making things less accessible, or some people may not know

Said expectation, which is frankly pretentious and takes away from the actual content of posts, makes it actively harder for anyone who needs any kind of accommodation to participate in said social activity

It’s also unfair to everyone. Your writing, your content, your characterization should be celebrated and engaged with. I don’t want anyone to feel like your posts must be a certain aesthetic or else it’s not worth reading. That’s a toxic af norm

I want to emphasize that I understand some people are perfectly capable of reading small text and extra bold and fancy fonts and do not see how it’s an issue. I understand that creating said barriers to others may be inadvertent. But if someone says hey x is not legible to them, it is not legible. It’s not really up for debate.

A lot of times it feels like people who express that things are not accessible get debated with or told it isn’t that bad or whatever else to make said person feel like they are actually the problem for trying to raise a concern/be honest that hey. I Cannot read this. Like no lie/exaggeration. If someone says “I just can’t read/process xyz easily or in some cases at all” believe them.

It is not meant to be a culture war or to be shaming self expression or whatever else it comes across as, but when people get overly defensive about aesthetics over accessibility, it turns into something ugly. Which then makes said people who want readable text from their community in a social activity feel unwelcome and then people who do a lot of formatting feel attacked

I just want to clarify though my stance here is strong

It’s not about taste

It’s not about preference

It’s not meant to be a dunk on people’s artistic sides

It’s not pleasant to bring up to anyone

It’s not fun to feel like you’re about to ruin a relationship when you try to tell someone that you want to read their work and either can’t or it’s difficult and you’re used to getting hostility over it

I like bullet journaling. I like typography. I get why making text pretty is appealing. There’s a lot of room for visually stimulating text in hobbies

But when the rp community at large puts aesthetics over other people, and it’s normalized to not care about being accessible, it feels like a massive Fuck You.

It might not be on purpose. Like I sound mad but I get it maybe it isn’t on purpose

But this post is here to say that this is what it comes across as. And it’s hurtful and frustrating and people have left RP over it. It’s frustrating to feel like your ability to do a thing with people if they would just do something that in fact takes less effort on their part to do fo post things clearly rather than to put speed bumps in it is somehow not worth it

And ideally, rather than try and accommodate on a case by case basis remembering who can’t read small text or who can’t process lots of bold or whatever, the norm would change to be accessible from the start. And it feels like there’s just a lot of resistance to that ever happening

[euhemeria]

Ways (From What I Understand)

She does not know how to explain it, outside the language of courtly love, and knighthood, how to express it in any language other than longing.

Fandom: Overwatch Rating: T Category: Gen Characters: Brigitte, Fareeha Warnings: None A gift for @ouhhoh; musings on butchness, role models, and first relationships. Also on ao3.

Rarely does Brigitte find herself in the position of asking someone for advice.  It is not that she does not need guidance, from time to time, but rather, as the youngest child in a large family, and as one of the youngest people in Overwatch, she finds herself often on the receiving end of other people’s unsolicited suggestions.  If there is something she needs to know, chances are someone is going to tell her—whether she asks for their help or not.

Usually, she finds it annoying.  She is 23, and she knows that is young, yes, but it is not that young, in the grand scheme of things.  She has finished school and been in the adult world for some time now—even if she did spend a good portion of that time living out of a van with Reinhardt, and now as a member of the less-than-legal Recalled Overwatch.  She knows adult things!  She is confident and competent in the field, and more than old enough to decide so for herself, despite what some of the others may think.

(It is hard not to take it personally, when she hears Angela call her a girl while talking to Reinhardt, saying she is too young to be here.  She knows that it is not, is more about how Angela feels about her own time in Overwatch—but still, it stings.  At least Reinhardt stands up for her, and when she tells her mother about it, later, Ingrid, who is never one to mince words, says that although she may be just as idealistic, she is less naïve than Angela was, at her age.)

Still, everyone has advice for her.  So many of them knew her when she was a child that it is difficult for them to see her as fully an adult, and that is frustrating, to say the least, even if some of the advice is useful.

At least Fareeha understands.  The others respect her, because she is a hard woman to not respect, but sometimes, the way they talk about her mother, it is clear that they see, too, the child she used to be.

For this reason, it is easier to go to Fareeha for advice than any of the rest of them, on the occasions she actually needs it.  She knows already that Fareeha sees her as a whole adult person, not an extension of her father or the child she once was, and Fareeha gives good advice, besides.

Or, normally she does, when Brigitte asks her about career-related issues, or has questions related to her weight training regimen.  Apparently, she, too, assumes Brigitte is less experienced than is actually the case, at least in the realm of relationships.

“I know it’s something a lot of people have a problem with,” Fareeha says, setting her weights back on the rack, “But if you want to have sex with her, you’re just going to have to say that.”  Brigitte does not know what to say to that, and Fareeha seems to take her silence as permission to continue.  “It doesn’t have to be a big conversation.  Be casual about it.  Put your hand on her thigh and tell her you’d like to, if she’s open to it as well.  People act like sex has to be some big deal, and—”

“That’s not—” Brigitte is mortified.  “We’ve had sex!”  Her face is always a splotchy red after a good workout, but now she can feel herself going fully pink—can see it, too, in her reflection.

“Oh,” Fareeha does not quite sound surprised, but she does not sound apologetic, either.  She straightens and looks at Brigitte somewhat critically, “I don’t see what the problem is, then.”

“Well, we’re… I mean, we’ve been having sex, but I don’t know if we’re dating, or…”  She makes a vague gesture with her hands.  “You know how it is.”

“No,” Fareeha tells her, “I don’t.”

“What?  Seriously?  You haven’t had to do the whole ‘What are we?’ thing?”  Brigitte had always thought that was a universal lesbian experience.

“Not with a woman I’m fucking, no.  I like to know where I stand before I have sex with someone.”  She says it like it is supposed to be obvious.

“I do too,” Brigitte wants to defend herself, “And I usually think I do!  But then you mean to hook up once, and she stays the whole weekend, and that’s fine.  But then you run into each other again, and it happens again and… okay, maybe it can happen twice.  Then she says she wants to see you again, and… you know!”  She did not think she would have to explain this.

“I have literally never done that.”

“Never?”  Given what little Brigitte knows about Angela’s dating history, she had assumed that was how Fareeha and Angela ended up together; it surprises her to hear such is not the case.  Rather than say that, though, she asks, “You’ve never had someone you met on an app stick around?”

A half-shrug, “I don’t sleep with people unless I already know them well.”

That surprises Brigitte perhaps most of all.  She does not think there is anything wrong with preferring that, of course, but Fareeha never struck her as the type, is confident and open and definitely not above posting thirst traps to social media.  Coupled with her earlier comment about sex not being a big deal, Brigitte just cannot quite make sense of it, of what the reasoning would be.  It feels like it would be rude to ask Why not?, so she settles instead for, “I can’t imagine only having sex with people I’m dating.”

“I didn’t say that,” Fareeha’s tone says God forbid.  “I’ve had friends with benefits.”

Admittedly, Brigitte had not considered that, but it brings back to mind her current problem, “But how do you know if you’re friends with benefits or dating?”

“I ask them where they see things going.”  Fareeha moves to go over to the area where they usually do their cooldown but then pauses, adds, “Before we have sex.”

“It’s a little late for that.”  Actually, it is a lot late.  Somehow, Brigitte feels like admitting just how long she has been maybe-dating is going to be more embarrassing than anything else that has been said, here, so she decides not to say that it has been four months, and that some of the nights that she has slept over, she has just slept.  It feels like it should be cut and dry.

“So why not just ask her?”  Fareeha moves into the first pose of their routine, gets on her back and pulls a leg towards her chest, stretching her hamstring. 

“I don’t know,” Brigitte says, settling down onto her own yoga mat with more of an audible thump, and pulling her leg towards her torso more quickly than she should, ow.  “I guess I’ve just never really actually dated anyone.”  It makes it difficult, to know how to ask, not knowing exactly what she would be asking for.

“Huh,” Fareeha sounds surprised.  “No inclination or never met the right girl?”

“Didn’t have the time.”  She was a late bloomer, as a teenager, and then by the time she was starting to notice other women, she was in engineering school.  From there, she went straight to traveling with Reinhardt, and on to here. 

“Mmm, I can see that,” Fareeha switches legs, does not even pause her movement as she asks, “But you want a relationship now?” as if it were so simple.

“Maybe?”  Dating seems like a lot of work, and a lot of communicating, and it feels a little embarrassing, to be 23 years old and to have to explain to the woman you are seeing that I can’t tell if we’re in a relationship or not. 

Fareeha concludes the whole second stretch without speaking again, sits up before pulling her arm across her chest, stretching her shoulder.  Posterior deltoid, Brigitte reminds herself.  Angela wants her to be memorizing these things.  “It sounds like you’re at least a little interested.”

“Does it?”  She hopes she has not sounded too eager.  That would be embarrassing, particularly if this does not work out.

Fareeha pulls her arm a little tighter across herself.  “You asked me,” she points out, “Not Zaryanova.”

Well, that is true.  Zarya has certainly been in her same position more than once, and may have been the better person to ask, if this were just about whether or not she is dating someone—but Fareeha is in a committed relationship, a serious one, one that seems happy, and healthy.

“I just don’t know how it would go,” she admits.  “What I would do.”

“Date her?”  Fareeha suggests.

“Well,” Brigitte says, “Yes.  But isn’t not that simple!”

Fareeha switches to the second arm, and now she is looking at Brigitte again, head turning with the stretch.   “It really is.”

“No,” Brigitte is not certain how to explain the issue.  It sounds silly to say I don’t know what’s expected of me, but she does not, not really.  “I haven’t really—I mean, I know you, of course, but I didn’t really grow up knowing many lesbians.  Lesbians in relationships.”  

Or, not adult lesbians.  Not lesbians who are older than her, who know more than she does about life, and romance, and what it means to be a woman who dates other women, who could model for her what it meant to be butch and to be in love. 

She loved knights' tales growing up, hearing about chivalry, and heroism, and protecting the people you love, but she knows, too, that it is one thing to read about it, to devour books of handsome lady knights and the princesses they rescued, and quite another to put any of that into practice, particularly in the 2070s.  Reinhardt does it, sure, lives his life as a knight, but she does not want his version of knighthood, does not want to model herself after a man—not wholly, anyway.

(She looks up to him, of course, has taken seriously her role as his squire, but it is one thing to want to be the kind of warrior he is, the kind of protector, and another to want her version of courtly love to be made in a man’s image.  For that, she does not want to be following the guidance of a man, does not even want to compare herself to one—she wants butch masculinity, butch knighthood, butch wooing and protecting and courting.  There is nothing wrong with the way Reinhardt lives his life, is much to be admired there, but Brigitte’s version of butchness is not a mimicry of manhood, is something else unto itself.  On top of that, she has never seen Reinhardt pursue anyone.)

“You know several now.”  Fareeha finishes the stretch, looks at her pointedly.

She knows Lena, too, and Zarya, and thinks Satya might be gay, also, but finds her exclusive use of the word partner difficult to parse.  That does not matter; if Satya is a lesbian, she is femme, Zarya’s relationship status is complicated, and Lena… Lena’s relationship with Emily seems good, it does, but Brigitte does not look up to her, in the way she does Fareeha, does not want to pattern herself after Lena, does not hear her talk about love and think I want that.

But, crucially, she knows Fareeha.  She knows Fareeha, and she overheard, once, Angela calling Fareeha her knight, and it may have been half in jest, but Brigitte locked on to that, that phrasing, imagined what it would be like, for a woman she loved to say the same of her, and it filled her with warmth, in a way little else has.  That is who she wants to be.

So she agrees, “I do.”  She knows Fareeha, even if she only got a glimpse, just that once, of that thing that she wants to be.  Most of the time, she sees very little of Fareeha and Angela’s relationship, finds it hard to locate the romance within the friendship, the camaraderie, but it was enough to see it, that one time, enough to make her realize that it is something she is longing for, to love a woman like that.

“We’re not enough for you?”  It is teasing, she can tell from Fareeha’s tone, but Brigitte knows what she is getting at, is asking what else Brigitte needs.

Normally, here, they would move on to a calf stretch, reach towards their toes, but it is hard to make eye contact doing that, even in the mirror, so Brigitte stays sitting up.  “I don’t know.  Lena’s long-distance, whatever Zarya has going on is a mess, and you and Angela are… you’re….”

“Private,” Fareeha supplies. 

“Right.”  That is one way of putting it.  Having grown up with her parents, it is strange, to her, to know a couple that does not engage in public displays of affection.  “So that isn’t exactly much to go on.”

“What is there to know?”

Everything, thinks Brigitte.  There is a whole language that exists between women in relationships, one she has seen glimpses of in passing, a hand at the back, an arm holding up an umbrella, a means of communicating love and protection in a way that is not possession.  She wants that, for herself, wants to be in that position, wants to know how to take care of a woman, the way she feels butch women are supposed to.

(To a lesser degree, she wants to know what it is to be taken care of, too, in the way she knows another woman could care for her, at the end of a long day, wants to be a protector, yes, but wants, also, to have someone to look out for her in turn, wants the comfort of knowing that although they understand she is capable of caring for herself, they still want to help lighten that load.)

“I don’t know.”  That is, Brigitte thinks, rather the point.  All she has is a series of moments, and relationships are far more than that, are all the things that happen in between.  “I just know that I want—I mean, if I’m in a relationship—I want me being butch to be a part of that.  Somehow.”

Obviously, it will be.  How could it not?  But she does not know how to say it, outside the language of courtly love, and knighthood, how to express it in any language other than longing. 

“Don’t worry about it,” Fareeha tells her, leaning in to the next stretch, apparently satisfied that this portion of the conversation is resolved.  “You’ll do fine.”

“But what am I supposed to do?”  For a woman who gives perfectly clear orders on the field, Fareeha is not helping her much here.

“Whatever you want.  It’s your relationship.”  A pause.  “Well, whatever you and your partner want.”

“I know,” Brigitte reaches to grab her own toes, makes sure she is mirroring Fareeha, so their faces are pointed in the same direction.  “But—how am I supposed to know what that is?”

“You just have to figure it out.”  Fareeha lets go of that foot, but lingers sitting up before switching to the other foot.  “I’m not trying to be evasive.  But it’s different, from person to person, what it means to be butch—or gay, or anything.  I can’t tell you what’s right for you.”

“I guess not,” Brigitte breaks the stretch a few seconds early, so she can sit up, too. 

Her lingering uncertainty must be clear, because Fareeha reaches out, puts a hand on her shoulder, solid, reassuring.  “You’ll figure it out.  You’re butch, so whatever you do is what a butch in a relationship does.  And if you’re really still nervous—I don’t know, try holding open a door?  That’s a good standby.”

The reframing is so simple, the idea that her being butch makes the things she does right for a butch, rather than doing butch things making her butch, but still, it is immensely reassuring.  Her way of being is already the right way, whether she has guidance or not, because she is right—but, still, there is the anxiety of the unknown, the potential for embarrassment in fumbling her way through finding what fits her.  She likes the idea of holding doors, but, “I never see you holding doors for Angela?”  Surely, at least, Fareeha can give her something more, a fallback to try, if it feels awkward, doing that.

“I tried,” Fareeha says, “But Angela isn’t the sort of person who appreciates that kind of gesture.”  There is warmth in her voice, fondness.  Brigitte thinks it would be a little annoying, if a partner rejected her attempt at chivalry, dismissed it as silly, but Fareeha clearly disagrees.

(As fond as Brigitte is of Angela, having grown up with her around, the two of them are certainly very different people, with different priorities and worldviews.  For all that Brigitte respects Angela, admires her even, she cannot begin to imagine what it is to date her—and thinks she herself would be much happier with a different sort of person.)

What Brigitte says instead is, “She’s very practical.”  It is an understatement.

“She is,” Fareeha’s smile is, again, fond.  “So I check her windshield wiper fluid instead.”

“Her wiper fluid?”  Car maintenance is about as far from courtly love as a person can get.

“That way, I know she’s safe on the road,” Fareeha says, reaching then for the other foot.  “And I get to feel like I’m protecting her.  Plus, it’s one less chore to worry about when she’s busy, so she appreciates it.”

Well, framed like that, Brigitte can see why it might be appealing, when framed that way, why it might feel right to Fareeha, to do it.  Maybe she has been going about this wrong, worrying over what to do, and has not been thinking enough about why she is doing it.  For her, maybe, it will not look the same, protecting a partner—although, after travelling with Reinhardt, she does know a thing or two about maintaining a car—but that is what it is about, the protecting, not the gesture itself.  There are ways she can find to do that, surely.

And the attitude, the wanting, the orienting of herself in a relationship to another person, that, she thinks, she has well in hand, always has had.

“I see,” says she, because she thinks at last she does.

“Good,” Fareeha is rising from her stretch as she answers.  “Is that all, then?  Because we’re pushing time, and I’m sure everyone would appreciate it if I showered before my afternoon meetings.”

It is everything she needed, yes, but “I do have one more question,” she says as she, too, stands.

“Yes?”  Fareeha was half-turned towards the locker room already, but she pauses.

“Does ‘I want to have sex, do you?’ really work for you?”  That simple?  “No seduction or big lead up or anything?”

“Yeah?”

“Ugh.”

Some people have it all figured out.

[fishsticksloser]

Heartache

Hobie Brown x gn!reader

Warnings: break up, angst, pretty peaceful break up

A/N: this was asked for on ao3 and in the comments so here it finally is! The bad ending :) Also in case you're interested, this is kind of what I imagine the spider totem looking like. It is an etsy link and it's so cute I really want it

Preface | Good

It's been months since Hobie dumped you. You tried to move on, but it was difficult. You had a box of his things to give back, but yet you couldn't part with some of them. The feeling and smell of his hoodies were a comfort, but you knew you had to give them back. Hobie hadn't spoken to you since that night. You texted to ask when and where he'd pick up his things, but got no answer. You missed him. you weren't sleeping, your eating schedule was also messed up. But you didn't blame him or yourself. Sometimes things are just destined to fall apart.

You hear his car outside, which comes as a surprise. He’s never come back here before. The knock on your door echoes throughout the house, sending goosebumps down your body. You approach the door, heart in your throat, and open it slowly, finding Hobie. His face is guarded, eyes downcast, his usual smirk replaced with a tense expression. He holds his keys in one hand, a duffel bag in the other, and your hoodie, freshly laundered. You can smell the detergent, but it doesn’t get rid of his unique scent.

"I'm guessing you're here for you things...?" You ask softly, not expecting him to come here. You step aside for him to come in.

"We need to talk," he says, stepping inside slowly. You’re not sure if you like this new serious vibe of his. It’s almost as if he’s a bit... frightened? He’s always been so sure of himself that seeing this side of him almost makes him feel like a stranger. He shifts his weight nervously and looks at you expectantly, waiting for you to respond or say something first.

"Okay...?" You mumble, closing the door behind him. You turn to face him, waiting for him to continue. He stares at you for a moment, biting his lower lip unconsciously before he speaks again.

"I miss you." It’s simple, blunt, and leaves you speechless at first. You know you’ve missed him too. He must have noticed that you hadn’t responded to his texts. "It hurts to be without you... And the more I think about it, the more I realize that you’re important to me." He takes a deep breath, looking down at his jeans for a moment before he looks up. "I don’t want to lose you."

You tug on your clothes anxiously, having not slept well since he dumped you and eating less. "You should've thought of that before you dumped me... And said all those things."

"I know… I’m sorry, Y/N. Fuck... I really am." He takes a deep breath before continuing. "I made a mistake, okay? I’m here to fix it. Let’s just start from the beginning, we don’t have to go any further than that. Just, please… give me another chance."

You’ve never seen him this serious before, the gravity of his actions seem to have finally hit him. The usual arrogance he exudes is completely gone, instead replaced with humility, and his eyes are softer than you’ve ever seen them. It’s almost hard to be angry at him—he looks so vulnerable.

"Hobie..." You shake your head and step away, your back against the door. "You-You can't just expect me to welcome you with open arms. You hurt me... Badly..."

"I understand I hurt you. Please, just… let me make it up to you." He continues. “I don’t want anyone else. I want you, Y/N.” His eyes are filled with emotion, raw and vulnerable. Everything inside of him aches knowing that he could lose you because of his stupidity. He reaches out towards you, his hand outstretched, and his gaze is desperate. "What do I have to do to prove to you how much you mean to me, Y/N?" He asks, his voice breaking slightly.

"If you actually wanted to change and try again, you have to do it yourself." You don't move away from his outstretched hand. "I'm not going to tell you how to fix things, you have to do it because I tried... So many times..."

"Fine..." Hobie reaches into his hoodie and pulls out the spider totem. He holds the smooth, almost metallic surface in front of both of you. "I'm not just going to say I care about you - I'm going to show you" He says, staring down at the totem in his palm. After a moment of consideration, he opens his palm up and holds it out to you. "Y/N, I'm giving you my totem... I want you to have it."

"Hobie, I gave that to you." You shake your head, pushing his hand away. "I can't take it, it's yours."

"It was always meant for you." He pauses as he looks at you, waiting for you to accept the totem. "I don't want you to think of this as a romantic gesture or an attempt at a grand gesture. This isn't about me trying to woo you or impress you. I'm doing this because this totem means more to me than anything else. Please take it."

"Hobie, it's meant for you. I don't want gifts." You answer, closing his fingers over the totem. Hobie shakes his head and grabs your hand. "I can't take this."

"I want you to have it." He smiles and places the totem in your palm. "You've done so much for me, Y/N... I'm giving you a piece of me. I'm not giving it to anyone else." Hobie closes your fingers around the totem like you'd done to him just seconds ago. "There's one more thing I want you to do for me though." His voice is quiet, nervous almost.

"What's that?" You ask, focusing on your closed hand to avoid his eyes.

"Keep it safe. You can keep it in your pocket, on a necklace, I don't care. Just... Promise you'll keep it safe." He pauses for a moment then steps forward, placing his hands on your cheeks. "I don't just want to repair our relationship, I want this to be better than it was before." He says, tilting your head up so he can look into your eyes. "I don't want a second chance, Y/N. I want a future with you."

"It's probably best if you leave now..." You clear your throat and avert your eyes. His smile fades slightly, but he doesn't stop looking at you. Hobie's gaze flickers to where his palm is still over yours.

"This isn't a romantic gesture, I don't want you to feel pressured to forgive me. I just wanted you to know that I'm here, that I'm not going anywhere." He smiles again, his gaze soft and sweet. For the first time in a long time, he isn't flirting with you or using his usual swagger. He's here as Hobie, not Spider-Man or whatever alter ego he wants to use. "I'll see you later, Y/N..." He mumbles finally, pressing a small kiss to your forehead.

Then he's gone.

[sunshinestayy]

Dear Stray Kids

On the extremely off chance that Chris and Lix are lurking on tumblr and find this post, this is what I'd say to the SKZ members if I had the chance.

(Before you come for me, I wrote most of this two years ago when I was a Baby STAY, and I tried editing it now, so it'd be less cringy. I still apologize if this is painful to read. I tried my best LMAO).

Bang Chan

Leader – BANG CHAN! Kangaroo – BANG CHAN!

To say that you are such an amazing man would be an understatement. You are an incredibly hard worker, and I wish that you went easier on yourself and got more rest. I know you strive for perfection in your craft, but rest. It’s okay.

I am so proud of you; STAY is so proud of you, and Stray Kids is (are?) so proud of you. I know you want to do more, and you feel like you have to do more, but everything you are already doing is perfect. Nevertheless, thank you for always giving us your best.

Thank you for being you. Thank you for being dependable, kind, helpful, empathetic and one of the sweetest humans to ever walk the face of this planet. Thank you for all the hard work you put into what you do. I can’t even imagine what it’s like to be in your shoes, but you are doing a fabulous job. You are the best leader SKZ could ever ask for, and a phenomenal person that STAY looks up to. The world needs more people like you. You are funny, SUPER talented, adorable, charming, empathetic, inspiring, intelligent, kind, incredibly handsome…ugh, there are not enough words in any language – let alone English – to describe how wonderful you are. I cannot and will never understand the hate that you get. To have people attack you for no apparent reason and hear such harsh things about yourself must be so difficult. I can’t imagine how you feel. I admire you SO much, and you are so strong, Channie. I’m so sorry that we can’t protect you from that, but STAY will try harder to defend you. You truly do not deserve that. No one does.

(I'm also sorry for the crazy shit that we do because, admittedly, sometimes we don't know our place. Thank you for tolerating us regardless lmao, and thank you for reinforcing your boundaries and putting us in place when we need it.)

From the bottom of my heart, thank you for everything. Thank you for being a source of comfort and security. You mean more to me than I could ever express. I know that STAY and Stray Kids feel the same.

You have such a special place in my heart. I love you, Chris.

**insert BIG hug here**

Lee Know

I’d be lying if I said that you didn’t intimidate me at first. I wouldn’t describe you as cold or mean, though. I’d say that you’re just blunt, and that your sense of humour isn’t really understood by everyone. I understand it, though – my sense of humour is a little like yours – and I really appreciate and take comfort in it. (You are absolutely hilarious!). Teasing is a valid love language😊.

You aren’t one to display your emotions for all to see, but it doesn’t mean that you are heartless. To you love is a verb, and your humanity shines through without you realising it, and I think that is truly beautiful. You are so strong, kind, gorgeous, hilarious, caring, smart, witty, and sharp.

Also, your cats so adorable, and the way you love them and interact with them (and the SKZ members) warms my heart! It’s a shame that I’m allergic to cat fur, but I can still adore them from afar.

You are ICONIC, Minho (and yes, your name is incredibly handsome). You are a phenomenal dancer, a stellar rapper, and a great singer! While Chan is the official leader of the group, you too lead the members in a beautiful way. You support Chan, and you also do a phenomenal job at taking care of the younger members. You are doing your best, and that is more than enough. That is spectacular. You are 100% unapologetically yourself, and you are also insightful, wise, and caring. Language barriers aside, I find great comfort in you, and you help me become more open-minded each day. When I become fluent in Korean – and when I get the chance to meet and/or interact with you – I will make sure to tell you how much I care for and appreciate you. If my Korean still sucks by then, I'll do it in Korenglish and hope for the best lmao.

I love you so much – more than you know…I know… LEE KNOW!

Changbin

YOUR VOICE!!! CAN WE JUST TAKE A MOMENT TO APPRECIATE THE SOUND OF YOUR VOICE WHENEVER YOU RAP?!

**screams and aggressively slams keyboard but tries to not break laptop**

(Also, YOHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!)

Oh, Changbin (Seo Changbin – don’t worry, I know you aren’t Oh Changbin **wink**) …where do I begin? Honestly, I love you. Period. You are so talented – that is an understatement – you literally give me LIFE! The way you interact with the members and react whenever they poke fun at you is hilarious. You always make me laugh. You are ICONIC!

Your stage presence is unparalleled, your skill is undeniable, your aegyo is AMAZING, your arms – I’m sorry, I need to take weightlifting lessons from you because HELLO?! (Please be my personal trainer, and please put me in a headlock. Thanks.)

Back to the point – you are literally such a wonderful person. You are also so kind, gentle and lovely. I wish I could cuddle you – dark image and all. You seem like such a wonderful person to just hang out with and talk to. I get such a warm vibe from you. You are incredibly sweet and loving. You are my comfort person, and I appreciate how you advocate not only for general health and fitness but also for loving oneself as is. You are genuine and unapologetically yourself. You are loved. You are amazing. You are talented. You are handsome. You are wonderful.

Our beloved dwaekki; life without Seo Changbin would totally suck.

Hyunjin

My first bias<3. You have a special place in my heart. Where do I even start?

The words beautiful, stunning, and gorgeous are not strong enough to describe you. This isn’t just about your visuals – you are a work of art, Hwang Hyunjin – your soul is also a wonderous sight for sore eyes.

You have such an amazing heart and a kind soul – you are so wonderful, warm, artistic, hilarious, and lovely. You’re also so TALL -_-

Like damn, compared to me you’re just…yeah, you’re tall! I love that, though. I love you.

Everything you’ve ever done has been nothing less than spectacular. Everything – including (but not limited to) your art, your dancing, your rapping, your hair (long, medium, or short) …need I go on?

I especially appreciate and admire how hard you work – not only for SKZ and STAY, but also for yourself. You’re constantly working on yourself, and I respect that so much. I love how passionate you are – it’s so evident in the way you move and express yourself artistically. It’s amazing to see. Just remember to be kind to yourself and – like I said to Chan – rest.

Hyunjin’s Counselling Centre has been a great help to me. Your words of comfort and encouragement have helped me get through the darkest of times. You have helped me even without knowing me or talking to me directly. You have the kindest and most beautiful, genuine, and amazing heart and soul. I’m sorry that people have tried to make you out to be what you are not. Please know that you are not what the haters are trying to put on you or turn you into. Please don’t interpret your sensitivity as weakness or fragility. I admire how you love and trust easily. While it can be a detriment when you are wronged, it is one of the best things about you.

Keep doing you, Hyun-e. We love you so much. No one can take that away from you!

Han

Jisung, you – like Hyunjin and Bang Chan…actually, all the members – have a special place in my heart. I have so much to say about you, but I have no idea where to begin.

You are so ethereal, so precious, so hilarious – the funniest member IMO but legit EVERYONE in SKZ makes me laugh and smile so much – so adorable (our beloved squirrel/quokka/hamster) …YOU ARE EVERYTHING!!!

Can we just take a moment to talk about your talent? There’s versatility, and then there’s you. Honey – haha, Hannie 😉 – you INVENTED versatility. Is there anything you can’t do?! (I’ll answer that right away – NO! YOU CAN DO ANYTHING AND EVERYTHING. PERIOD!).

Your rapping…like, wrap me in 3 burritos and call it a day. I LOVE IT SO MUCH! Your singing…umm, HELLO?!?!?! Did someone say FLAWLESS?! THAT’S YOU! Your dancing almost rivals Lee Know’s, but don’t tell him that because tissue will end up in someone’s mouth – and it won’t be Hyunjin’s. Open any dictionary and look for the word ace. You’ll be staring at your reflection because that is what you are!

As if your beauty, charisma, and talent didn’t give me enough reasons to explode, your personality comes in and KA-BOOM. I am deceased.

You are the life of the party, but you are also the comforting home to go to after the party…I hope that came out the way I intended it to. Point is, you are (or rather you seem, because I don’t personally know you) fun to be around and mess around with, but you are also someone to share the quiet, intimate, peaceful moments with.

Peace is something I wish I could give you in abundance – in addition to all the love and happiness in the world because you deserve it, duh. You have no idea how much it hurts to see you or any of the members experience anything related to exhaustion, pain, discomfort, heartbreak, or suffering. I know that the bad things in life help us grow stronger, and suffering makes the good times much more enjoyable and whatnot, but still…no one wants to watch their loved ones endure that.

I can only hope that my love and support – along with that of STAY and your amazing members – will remind you to keep on going.

You are enough, Hannie. You are so strong, so amazing. You are doing so well, and we are so f***ing proud of you. We love you. I love you so much.

Felix

Ah, Lixie!! Our sunshine! The member with duality powerful enough to cause and stop traffic.

(OKAY, YOUR VOICE?!?!?!  Pack it up, Corpse Husband! Also, you are more than your voice. Your talent is immeasurable, from your vocals and dancing to your bakery, ASMR, and gaming skills.)

You are sunshine personified. There is no way that someone can look at you and not smile; that is physically and scientifically impossible. You are our happiness – our reason to smile and be at peace. You are a healer. I get such positive energy from you. Whether you’re baking brownies and cookies, making ASMR videos, giving meme-able dance tutorials – BRING POPS IN SEOUL PRESENTER LIX BACK! – or goofing off and repping Gen Z with your dance moves (don’t be shy, drop your TikTok, bestie!), you are such a marvellous sight to see.

You are my happy place and I hope that you continue to grow in happiness, peace, and love. You are extraordinarily unique and one-of-a-kind, and that is a wonderful thing. You are one of the kindest and most genuine people I have ever seen. Some people can be nice in a fake way, and you are not like that. You are pure love and kindness personified. You are a marvellous creation, a shining light in this dark world. Never lose that spark. Always keep your head up and that (beautiful) smile wide.

Keep it up, Felix. I love you. (I love your freckles as well, and your vibe is immaculate. Period.) You are a wonderful human being, and you don’t need to do or be anything different. Please stay as you are (but also continue evolving as you see fit).

Seungmin

Your voice…I can’t even put into words how much comfort it gives me. My mind is a constant raging storm, and your voice always calms me. It’s the warm hug on a cold day; the cool breeze on a scorching afternoon.

**Insert 5000 more words detailing how much I love your (singing and speaking) voice**

Seungmin, you are such a beautiful person. Quiet, calm, comforting… and sometimes chaotic (but in the best way possible). Honestly, your existence brings me peace. Your humour is underrated, quick and unexpected. You are hilarious. You constantly surprise me and keep me on my toes (in a good way, of course.) You are also MEGA talented – duh – let’s not sleep on your skills! You have a gift, you really do, and I acknowledge and respect that so much. I admire you so much!

You are so handsome. I’m not just saying that because you got your braces removed and are bias wrecking everyone left, right and centre. You have been an ethereal prince since day 1 (or shall I say DAY6? I’m sorry. That was bad).

You have nothing to worry or feel bad about. (That came out of nowhere, but I just felt like saying that). You are making waves, no matter how small they may seem. They are still impactful. You are doing spectacularly, and you will only get better and better. You will be the greatest, I know you will. I see you. I appreciate you. You are absolutely wonderful, and I love you.

I.N

I confidently saying this knowing that I am a month and a few weeks younger than you:

YANG JEONGIN, YOU ARE SO ADORABLE!!!!!!

You are legit the superior maknae, and you are so powerful and strong. I don’t ever want you to think or speak badly about yourself – you are amazing, Jeongin. Never doubt that for a second.

You are also much more than SKZ’s maknae and aggibang. You are a star in your own right, and you are incredibly handsome, talented, charming, and hilarious. Your smile lights up my world, and it is more infectious than any epidemic/pandemic (in the best way possible. I meant that as a compliment, I promise). By simply smiling, you have the power to turn my day from terrible to great in a millisecond.

Your voice is so calming. I love the sound of your voice; it’s like a vocal hug that wards off all the negativity that surrounds me.

You have the purest soul I’ve ever seen, and you are genuine and authentically yourself. I hope you never lose that – never lose your youthful spirit and your zestful energy. It is refreshing, and it is one of the many things that make you a wonderful individual.

What else can I say without sounding redundant?

Watching you grow and become more confident in yourself and your craft is amazing. You have always been wonderful, but you have improved so much, and you’ve made such incredible progress. I hope you are proud of yourself. I am so proud of you!

I love watching you perform – you clearly love what you do, and you are so happy while you are singing, dancing, and/or rapping. That makes me so happy, and it makes me adore you even more. I hope you never lose your joy for what you love.

You are a wonderful human, Jeongin, and you are definitely a key member of SKZ. You are not in this group by accident; you are where you are meant to be, and you will continue to shine.

I love you.

To all the members

If I were to use one of your songs to reference my affection for you, I would choose I am YOU. That song – along with pretty much the rest of your discography – has gotten me through the darkest of days where I thought some of the most awful thoughts you could imagine. When I felt weak and like I couldn’t go on, I found you and you all became my strength.

In you and your music, I found healing. I found a reason to be happy – to continue fighting and surviving in this cruel world. I can’t tell you how alone I’ve been – how alone I’ve felt – all my life, so it’s wonderful for me to get lost in your music and sing and dance as if I’ve never shed a tear or had my heart broken. Each song is like entering a world where pain doesn’t exist; where negativity, self-hatred and loneliness are nowhere to be found. In your music and as a STAY, I feel like I belong – like I am not a weirdo, an outcast or a person who doesn’t deserve anything remotely good in life.

You make me feel like I could conquer the world and that I deserve it. For that, I thank you. For putting a smile on my face every day – even on the days where I don’t want to do anything except cry myself to sleep – I thank you SO MUCH. I am eternally grateful to you.

This statement is considered a cliché – especially because of how many times you’ve probably heard it – but really, you saved me. You injected new life into me when I thought that there wasn’t any left.

I see a part of myself in all eight of you. Bang Chan reminds me of my own willingness to love, care for/about and support my nearest and dearest.

I relate to Minho, his sense of humour, and his outlook on life. Teasing and wordlessly helping/providing for/taking care of others is also my love language.

As a fellow fire sign, I definitely see quite a bit of myself in Changbin. He reflects my playfulness, sensibility, and ability to relate to younger people even though I am (well, I consider myself) quite mature. I’m just as dramatic as Hyunjin (just jokes) and in him I see my creativity, passion, empathy, and artisticness (is that even a word?).

Han is just as hilarious as I am (if not, more), but I can relate to him in the sense that people don’t really see my vulnerable moments. I can be loud and goofy when I’m with my friends and other people I am comfortable around, but I become introverted and reclusive when I am by myself or around people with whom I feel uncomfortable. I am also a massive homebody😊.

Lix is full of energy, life, and light, and I can relate to that sometimes (especially when I’m around the right people). Like Felix, I would also like to heal others, make them feel better, and comfort them with my presence and my actions.

I wish I could sing as well as Seungmin, but I suppose I have something else in common with him – I have brown eyes (I just realised that all of you have brown eyes, and that joke was more cringy than it was funny. **Face palm**. Anyway…). In all seriousness, I’d say that Seungmin reflects my ability to shine through and use my voice, even if it is not heard or appreciated by everyone. I also love puppies and dogs, and I am quick-witted.

Just like Jeongin, I am the youngest in my family (I know that he’s the middle child in his biological family, but he’s the youngest in his SKZ family, so there! Loophole!). Like Jeongin, while I appear as cute and wholesome (sometimes), I have an intelligence and maturity that is often underestimated and overlooked. I still try my best to live past the label that has been put on me. I feel that people will forever see me as a baby no matter what I do, so we are in the same boat, I.N. I know that I am making little improvements day by day. At least, I hope so.

Stray Kids members, I have so much love for all of you – I don’t even know how to express it, even after typing out this long letter.

For now, I hope that me thanking you and reminding you how much I appreciate and care for you will suffice. I am so proud of you, and I am in awe of how much you all shine. You are such amazing humans – I say humans here to emphasize that I recognise your humanity, and I am not putting you on a pedestal. I do not expect you to be cookie-cutter, perfect people. You will trip, make mistakes, and experience hardships; that is just how life works.

I believe in you, though. I know how strong you all are. You all have gone through things that I could never fully comprehend or fathom, but you are still standing. I admire you so much for that.

With love,

sunshinestayy

(P.S Please consider visiting and performing in South Africa someday. I’d love to see you all in person, and I know many other South African STAYs who feel the same way! <3 JYPE, PLEEEEAAASSSEEEE!!!!!)

[cosmicdreamt]

Excerpt from Chapter 7: Waning gibbous - Strength and The Sun

Chapter 1 || Chapter 2 || Chapter 3 || Chapter 4 || Chapter 5 || Chapter 6 || Chapter 7 || Chapter 8 || Chapter 9 || Chapter 10 || Chapter 11

Once again she’s been made to look at herself from the outside looking in, and once again she’s proven that she doesn’t give herself enough credit. He’s right. Most people find it so difficult to go through so much and remain hopeful. Most would give up seeing any good in the world after being beat down time and time again. But the ones that keep trying? And succeeding? And making the best whenever they can? She would admire those people.

Now, Neff wouldn’t consider herself an optimist. She thinks way too much about both the pros and the cons to keep seeing the brightest sides of things. If anything she’d consider herself a realist that can find a good point in most situations, if not all. Trauma had turned that bright eyed little girl jaded - or maybe it just gave her the ability to see the world for what it truly is while applying those hopes in a more realistic way. 

Everything is about perspective. Is the glass half full? Is the glass half empty? For her it’s all about if the liquid was being poured into or out of the glass in the first place. Then one has to consider - what type of liquid was being poured into the glass? Was it something good for someone, or was it poison? Filling something doesn’t always mean it’s something good. Same with pouring something out. Are you getting rid of something good for you, or are you getting rid of something bad to make more room for something better?

At one point Neff’s life had been a very distinct world of black and white. You either were or you weren’t. Because of that she’d ended up doing a lot of things she wasn't proud of…and because of that she’d learn to view the world instead in greyscale. When you can see the world with so many more details you can learn to understand it better. Not everything is possible to understand, and that’s okay, but what matters is being able to understand as much as you’re able to.

As she had just discussed with her therapist prior, people change over time depending on their environment and experience. For better or for worse depends on how an individual looks at it. The biggest question for Neff at this point is which does she think she changed for?

If you asked her this question about her choices in the past she’d most certainly tell you she changed for the worst, but as she sees it now? Maybe it’s less that she changed for better or for worse and just simply…changed. Did something always have to be labeled good or bad?

She changed from a young child with so much more hope for what the world had to offer to a troubled teenager who saw the world for what it really was. At the time, however, it was more that she saw all the bad the world had to offer. She recognized how unfair it could be, how unjust it could be, and how the world could be just plain cruel. Sometimes there seemed to be no rhyme or reason as to why good people suffered and bad people could live their lives without worry.  She wanted so badly to escape that type of world, to force it to give her something better, but in the end all she did was make things worse.

And then she changed again - into an adult with more understanding of the world. Understanding that, well, it’s impossible to understand everything and to just try to work with what you have. She learned to appreciate the smaller things in life better, she learned how not to focus so much on all the bad things in her life, and she learned to focus on the things that were within her control instead of everything that wasn’t. She learned how to properly express herself and how to feel her feelings without making it the problems of others, she learned how to live with her trauma better and work on bettering the symptoms she had gotten because of it. Her doubts, her suspicions, her over observations, her fears…they were all things that changed within her that weren’t good or bad, it just was. It was all up to her how she managed these things and if she let them control her life or not.

“I’m a warrior and a survivor.”

As soon as she speaks those words the weight of them finally hits her. Tears instantly begin falling from her eyes and she feels the tiny arm of her Dream gently rubbing her back. She truly had been fighting so hard for so long, hasn’t she? She went from her highest high to her lowest low…and managed to crawl back up out of it. It’s true what they say - when you’ve reached rock bottom the only other place you can go is up. She didn’t bury herself after falling so far down, didn’t let it consume her and eat her alive. She had a newfound appreciation for life and what she could make out of it. That’s not easy for people. But she did it.

She knows what it’s like for the emotional brain and logical brain to constantly be at war with one another - and just how easy it is to let your emotions get the better of you. You spend all that time trying to see the world in all its different colors and shades - to understand the things that won’t send you into a spiral, just for the emotional brain to be able to hit the light switch and throw you into darkness. It makes you panic, it throws all rationale out the window, and it puts you right back to acting and reacting based on fear. It’s only after you’ve had time and let your eyes adjust do you realize nothing had changed from when you last saw it and all you had to do was turn the light back on yourself. 

Sometimes it really was as easy as giving yourself a little time to think about things more clearly to realize it’s not as bad as you thought it was.

Things may not always work out that way in the moment, however, and that’s okay. Humans aren’t meant to be perfect, so having mental illness or trauma or chronic illness doesn’t make you any lesser than anyone else. It may take a little more time and effort to overcome those hurdles and reach a point in life where things are more manageable, but that doesn’t make one weaker. No, if anything it makes them stronger - knowing the battles that one has to face daily.

It’s so easy to feel like you have to fight harder and do more to earn your place in the world when most if not all of your life seemed like a constant fight for survival to begin with. When it’s a struggle just to get up in the morning and do simple tasks that anybody else could do with ease, when it takes all your strength and concentration just to wash your face or brush your teeth or even eat, when simply existing is a daily battle it’s so easy to see yourself as a failure.

But the truth is when even those little things feel so hard and you still manage to do them, when it takes all that energy and you still pull through - you’ve fought and survived another day.

And that is enough. All you need to do and be is enough.

[borderlinereminders]

Hi!! With my bpd, I need a lot more reassurance and affection than probably most others without it.. I’m super affectionate and touchy and always calling my partner pet names. They often don’t mind this but they sometimes get overwhelmed with touch which is okay!! (It does hurt but I do know it’s not personal and I’m never complaining about it, I respect their boundaries!!) When they don’t want to be touched, but I need to touch them, it can be a little difficult!! I don’t really know how to explain it but sometimes I just need to feel them and it doesn’t seem to make sense to other ppl so idk )):

But also they’re less affectionate than I am, and that’s just the way they are but it kinda makes me sad sometimes cause I always call them cute things and they usually just call me by my name, or I’m always baby talking them or saying sweet things and while they are very loving and sweet I think we just have two different love languages and it can be difficult at times

I know you’re not a professional so I’m not asking for anything like that!! I was just moreso wondering if you or anyone else had any input on that as someone who also has bpd (and autism) (bc i suspect we both might have it tbh)

Hi anon,

Have you both sat down and talked about love languages and how you both like to receive and give love?

In all honesty, my partner and I broke up two years ago because of not understanding each other’s love languages. He likes affection and being verbally told. I showed my love by surprising him with gifts. He thought I didn’t love him because I didn’t express it in a way he understood. We ended up getting back together when he realized I did love him. We communicate much better now. My point is that it’s valid and probably a good idea to sit down and actually discuss both your needs and wants and how you can meet them together. Relationships can often and usually take compromise. And finding a way to work on compromise while not overstepping boundaries can be challenging, but there is often a middle ground that can be found.

I do have some suggestions for the touch thing, though not the exact same, some alternatives are:

Something like asking if they would design you a build a bear or something similar. It can even be done online and you can record a voice recording. It might be a nice alternative to hold or even pet. This would be nice to touch and it won’t replace the need for touch but it might help. You can of course design one yourself but I thought it might have more meaning if they did it for you.

Do they have a hoodie/other item that smells like them that you can hold?

I actually really recommend weighted blankets if you can afford one.

Soft or interesting texture stim items. Things you can pet, like the build a bear idea. A nice soft blanket is one of my favourites.

I say this a lot and you’ve probably read it, but maybe you can ask them to record you a voice recording, write you a letter, or something similar that you can look at when you’re feeling a need for affection/reassurance and they aren’t in a place to provide it.

Good luck, anon.

[not-bcring]

dragcns-den asked: “In every moment a choice exists. We can cling to the past or embrace the inevitability of change and allow a brighter future to unfold before us.”  —  (( Makoto @ Nagito - after all the craziness has passed, seeing how things are going with the after-game Dr2 babs on the island. Because Nagito deserves the chance to interact with the Hope Boi again  lol )) @not-bcring​

Originals Rp Meme || Accepting

There’s only a soft smile in response, how honored he was truly to be able to speak with Makoto again. Then again, he’s honored whenever anyone wants to speak with someone like him. Nagito knows well what he means by those words, and he certainly believes them himself. Though sometimes, to keep that brighter future, certain weeds have to be trimmed. Or at least, one would think so.

“I would expect no less from you, after all you’ve made quite a change for the future in the name of hope yourself. Those who cling to the past are who need to be cut out so that the future can remain bright, or it’ll simply keep cycling back because of those few people, don’t you think?”

✩   「 resiliency-in-starlight 」   ✩  

「 ☆ 」   Nagito is an interesting soul, to say the least, and Makoto knows that he’s barely scratched the surface of what lies within the fellow Lucky Student. Although, now that he’s known more commonly as the Ultimate Hope, perhaps Makoto no longer has any right to the title? Yet, no matter what he’s called, Makoto still feels a tie towards it. ‘ Luck ’ is what brought him to Hope’s Peak. To his friends. And yes, to the tragedy that befell them... But also eventual victories, hard-earned through sacrifice and stubbornness, and the bonds forged in the fires of the Hell that overtook the world. A devastation that is slowly but surely being set right, greatly thanks to the help of those now confined to Jabberwock Island.

Sometimes, Makoto wonders if the others comprehend just how much he owes to them... To everyone. With as much praise AND criticism as he gets— especially now as he works to rebuild Hope’s Peak and the symbol it provides for the world —it can be easy to feel like other get overlooked in a shadow he has no desire to cast, nor does he try to make span any longer than it already has. Unfortunately, the previously despaired don’t have much choice but to remain set aside... for the moment. Makoto has no intention of forcing them on the sidelines inevitably. They deserve the same fresh start that everyone else is getting. 

Whether or not they believe it. 

❝  Well... I wouldn’t put it exactly that way.  ❞  Makoto replies, a light, slightly-nervous laugh lacing his words. Not out of any unease towards Nagito, but simply a habit of sharing his opinions that he has yet to shake. After a lifetime of people preferring he be quiet, it’s difficult to accept that his words hold as much value as others now seem to think. Looking at Nagito, the shorter male beams with a more easy-going smile,  ❝  I prefer to think of it as— those who cling to the past, especially if it’s a dreary one, can be shown a better way. People aren’t incapable of change, no matter how difficult that change may be to achieve.  ❞   

Looking back in front of himself, Makoto’s voice softens, as does his expression. Appearing more thoughtful as he takes in the expanse of the sky above them,  ❝  I have to believe that... Because that’s what Hope is. It’s not giving up, even when things are at their darkest. It’s seeing the light, no matter how dim.  ❞  Grimacing, Makoto’s gaze falls to ocean before them instead. Taking in the steady crashing of the waves. Beautiful... but deadly in the right circumstances.  ❝  I know that some people can be more... challenging than others. But- if our first instinct is to cut down what doesn’t fit in the world we’re trying to create, then....  ❞  

❝  How long until it gets easy? Until we cut before we even try. Before we think to try... Before we know it, we could lose some of the most beautiful flowers just because we mistook them for weeds.  ❞     「 ☆ 」