#still cant use this website but very cool

[pastanest]

c.ai links

for those of you who don’t know, there’s a funky app/website called c.ai (character ai) where you can interact with fan-programmed bots, which is pretty cool!! given how much I adore the characters I’ve written for, I figured it could be fun to make bots for them, using segments of my writing to format the bots themselves!

so, that said, here’s a list of the bots I’ve made so far with their corresponding links - as the app is still in beta I’m not sure whether searching for ‘pastanest’ will work, but that’s my username on c.ai as well as here :)

> I’ll add all new bots to this list and reblog it each time as an update

⋆.ೃ࿔*:･⌖

Spencer Reid

shrimp reid

no established friendship - you’re newest member on the team and you’re being introduced to everyone; it’s up to you what cases you work on!

jesus reid

established friendship - Spencer is frustrated by having to use his cane, disliking the impact on his mobility and independence. luckily, you’re there to brighten his spirits!

short-hair reid

no established friendship - joining the bau Spencer has a more cynical view on love after losing Maeve, so tries to push away his feelings for you from the moment you meet!

boyband reid

established friendship - mutual pining, no specific location/story, it’s completely up to you!

prison reid

established friendship - mutual pining, feelings pretty obvious, but you decide whether Spencer is due to leave prison soon or if you want to visit him a few times first!

post-prison reid

established friendship - you joined the team during/after Spencer was in prison (potential for age-gap if preferred, but not compulsory) and you have a very obvious crush on Spencer!

professor reid

established professor/student relationship - you purposefully stay behind after a university lecture (potential for age-gap if preferred, but not compulsory) to talk with your favourite professor!

⋆.ೃ࿔*:･⌖

Aaron Hotchner

joining the team

no established friendship - you’re the newest member of the team and Hotch quickly develops a soft spot for you!

⋆.ೃ࿔*:･➷

Daryl Dixon

farm era

established friendship - based on just after Andrea shot Daryl, you arrive at his tent to check on him, but you decide where the story goes from there!

alexandria era

established friendship - you approach Daryl while he’s working on his bike, but you decide if you want to involve any specific canon events from the show/comics based on where you take the story!

⋆.ೃ࿔*:･𓆩♛𓆪

Jon Snow

winterfell

established friendship - before Jon goes to the wall, his love for you is the only thing that can convince him against joining the Night’s Watch!

the wall

no established friendship - the only girl on the wall, you are under the protection of Lord Commander Mormont and you tend to do tasks that keep you out of the way of the men, but sometimes you cant help crossing paths!

Brienne Of Tarth

forest dwellers

established meeting - you are part of Brienne and Podrick’s party as they search for the Stark girls, and Brienne already has quite the soft spot for you!

[secretmellowblog]

I hope tumblr doesn’t die because No other social media site is as good for long, thoughtful, nuanced analyses of media. Yeah tumblr is also full of dumb shallow hot takes and shitposts, but you can make dumb shallow hot takes and shitposts anywhere —-there are no other popular social media sites that let you easily format and share long essays on the media you enjoy, and then have conversations around those long essays.

Fandom on all the other big social websites just seems so utterly …shallow. And it’s not because people on other websites aren’t thoughtful or don’t have deep things to say, but because these sites’ formats do not allow for any kind of long nuanced conversations.

Tiktok? Things have to be crammed into a super short video with an attention grabbing headline, and you can’t hyperlink sources. Instagram? Everything has to be in an image format with strict limits on length, and nothing will be shown to your followers anyway because of how Instagram’s algorithm works, and also no hyperlinks. Twitter? Strict character limits, and if you split it into threads it means someone can retweet a part of your essay completely out of context, and also very little freedom with formatting.

It frustrates me so much. If I go into the Tumblr Les Mis fandom I’ll find really compelling long essays on the original novel (including essays being written for the ongoing book club) on the story’s historical context, or the parallels between different characters and their narrative foils, or the way the politics were defanged for certain adaptations, or the way Victor Hugo’s personal life and failings affected the novel. But on tiktok I’ll get the same five shallow stale jokes from 2013 over and over, or maybe the same “DID U KNO THAT IN THE MUSICAL JAVERT AND VALJEAN SING THE SAME LEITMOTIF” style of basic Intro To Les Mis 101 For Babies media analysis (which is what Tiktok considers deep media analysis), or stale “LOL JAVERT ACTS GAY” style jokes as if we’re living in the early 2000s and calling a character gay is still a funny punchline. And it’s impossible to have any kind of deeper thoughtful discussions than “DID U KNOW <x Kool Fact>” or “lol <shallow observational joke>” on tiktok because the platform just isn’t built for building niche communities around in depth conversations. it’s built to churn out bland generic content for as wide an audience as possible, which means pointing out a small detail like an Easter egg and calling it “cool” is deep media analysis, because you cant have longer more in depth conversations without alienating people. And I hate it. Bc like, it’s not because there aren’t smart clever thoughtful people on Tiktok— there are—it’s because Tiktok isn’t built for these conversations, and anyone who wants to have them has to really fight against the things the website encourages or prioritizes!

Or like, if I go into the LOTR fandom on Tumblr, I’ll find tons of extremely long analysis and fanfic, and analysis of queer readings of the story. On Instagram people will still shriek in terror if you suggest the characters are gay, and most of the popular lotr posts are stale memes recycled from like 2007. There’s really no room for thoughtful media analysis, and even if you did create it, instagram’s algorithm would make sure no one saw your post anyway.

And everyone’s going to say “the algorithm shows you what you’ve seen before so maybe it’s your fault ~” or whatever but i do look for things I want! I do! “The algorithm” doesn’t know me or what I want or value or care about beyond this meaningless surface level.

The only thing that was worthwhile about these sites was the great visual art people were creating, but now the websites are overwhelmed with meaningless soulless machine-generated AI glurge, and it sucks. It just really, really sucks.

I’m honestly confused about why people don’t use tumblr….There’s no character limits! You have freedom with post formatting, and can insert images throughout textposts to illustrate specific points you’re making beneath the paragraphs where they’re necessary! You can add hyperlinks, linking to your sources! People can reblog your entire essay and share it, and then add on with commentary that then becomes part of a larger conversation! People can find your stuff through the tagging system! Reblogging means posts stay in circulation for years instead of being dead 30 minutes after they’re uploaded! If you want to have genuinely interesting text conversations about a piece of media, there really isn’t a better social media website for it anywhere.

To be clear, I’m definitely not saying Tumblr media analysis is *always* clever and thoughtful or etc etc. there are shitposts and nonsense here too (plenty of which I’ve created lol.) I’m saying that Tumblr gives people the tools for in-depth insightful analysis to happen. Whether people choose to do it or not is their own decision XD. But the reason lengthy in-depth conversations and book clubs are even possible here is because Tumblr is built for allowing these conversations to happen, in a way other sites simply aren’t.

It’d really suck if it died, because it’d be a huge blow to…being able to easily find long insightful in-depth media analysis written by fans. I currently don’t think there’s anything that could replace it.

[gentlebeardsbarngrill]

01/21/2024 Crew Recap

Well holy shit all.

We finally fucking did it! We hit 75,000 signatures! That's crazy! The next goal line is literally twice that, and I know it seems daunting but don't give up, the more we get the more we show how much people want OFMD picked back up! We don't have to make that goal to show how passionate we are, we already have!

I know it feels like we've been doing this forever (12 days can you believe it?) but the scuttlebutt around deck is that we are making waves, and it's good to keep up the engagements so studio execs can see just how much we care!

We've been kicking ass on the #AdoptOurCrew hashtag on twitter and other platforms

===Articles===

I'm starting with articles tonight because this first one is phenomenal so please read it, it's by our very own @celluloidbroomcloset who if you follow them, you know their analysis is top notch. If it doesn't give you hope I don't know what will!

Our Flag Means Death And The Fight For Queer Joy

Cancelled Max Show Fans Utilize Netflix Billboard Trend, Creator Responds to Campaign Efforts

=== CREW KUDOS ===

We've had SO MUCH to be proud of about the last almost 2 weeks (oh my god I still cant believe it's been that long). Our efforts have been coming to fruition in a thousand different ways! Here's a couple more!

=First up, is the Fandom Project!=

As always thank you to @renewasacrew and in this case @tealknives and everyone else involved in this particular project for all your hard work!

Twitter / Tumblr

CW: FLASHING LIGHTS/ COLORS

=Next up, Cool Descriptions of all of you=

Thanks to @aproperpirate on Twitter for putting this together:

Just some cool descriptions of how unhinged we've all been, and I think you should be incredibly proud!

==How To Help==

Since this section has gotten to be a bit long, I'm separating it out into a separate post -- please go here for the details of the day that will be kept updated whenever I'm awake.

Here's the HOW TO HELP SECTION please visit it!

=Cast and Crew News=

Samba had a baby!

Also, Errol Shand (Ricky) has just been promoting the crap out of SaveOFMD Stuff on his IG so I just had to shout out to him here. What a guy.

=Cross Fandom Watch Party!=

Looks like there's gonna be some cross fandom watch parties on twitter you're welcome to tune in for Jan 23-26 on twitter. They'll be watching good omens in an effort to try and get engagement up with PrimeVideo. It sounds like it'll be similar to the LubeAsACrew but with Good Omens fans! Thank you to @Dandeebakes on Twitter for getting these organised!

Hashtags to use: #PirateOmens #AdoptOurCrew #SaveOFMD, and helps to @PrimeVideo

=== Contests ===

Looks like there's a contest for 2023 Reader's Choice Performer Of the Year, and you can go vote over here:

=Other Platform Recaps!=

It's been brought to my attention there are some other recaps going on on various platforms, feel free to check them out!

Twitter: @Mytabsclosed

Website: omfd-crew.com

These lovely folks have a full week wrap up if you wanna check it out here!

---------------------------------------------------------

A wonderful note from @RedsiesWorld on Twitter, something to remember is we are in fact fighting for our crews jobs as well (not just s3) and you're kicking ass!

---------------------------------------------------------

So all in all, 12 days of Polite Menacing has been BAT SHIT INSANE and every one of you should feel super fucking proud of all the hard work. This is a break checkpoint however ---PLEASE TAKE A BREAK IF YOU NEED IT (or even if you don't think you do). It's super important you take care of yourself! No one on the crew is going to be upset or disappointed that you took a break! We all are contributing in our own ways, so no need to worry if you're not doing the same as someone else! You are doing plenty!

Remember:

Drink Plenty of Water (Hydrate!)

Eat something good for you!

Get Some Sleep!

Do something Creative that makes you happy!

Go outside for a few minutes! (weather permitting)

Shit is hard, life's a dick, but you are stronger and more capable than you can possibly imagine, and you've got 10's of thousands of people out here rooting for you. All the love folks, wherever you are, whatever you're doing. You are wonderful and you are enough <3

---------------------------------------------------------

Tonight's random Rhys picture is what I can only assume is Murray getting a leaf blower blown in his face. You're welcome.

[cheap-jumpscare]

ranting abt being kanade yoisaki.... if ur uncomfy with doubles, scroll away !!!!!!!1

raghhhhh i need white hair and my hair needs 2 be straight n long...... sighs. i already have blue eyes n im already extremely pale so thumbs up but ugh. i shld be skinnier too and that is related :|

i cant tell if im fickin or not but i rlly do wish i looked like. me? ive even always ACTED like me. im just. Kanade Yoisaki. this is the one "just like me fr.." character that's been CONSISTENT.

i was watching a video essay my meowtual Vriska made and SIGHS yeah. its >here< btw pls watch it. very good art and a very cool survey !!

^ but in relation to that I had a mini realization sorta. if i am a kanade fictionkin then i AM just Kanade. there would be no seperation between me and Kanade Yoisaki. if i AM fictionkind then I wouldn't be a "kanade kinnie" id BE kanade. just like how Vriska's whole video is about how fickind tend to suppress their identity to be more palatable. its just so hard to figure out if i AM fickindddd :|

and even then i dont feel like id be exactly like 'canon' me. id be different. id have several traits and such that i always have said I 'headcanon' Kanade with. maybe thats just me bein a bit Sillymode but urghfghg.

im just like i am in the game. i dont go outside regularly because the sun hurts my eyes, bright lights in general suck (though this may just be because my eyes are a lighter color- qwant it its weird), im very serious about music and i do believe it CAN save people, im not very good at personal hygiene and yet inexplicably im considered ~generally~ attractive by, at the very least, my parents. I've mentioned all that before, though. Plus preferring online school.

another thing i want to say bc i feel like it. everytime i see anyone else who's also a character i Am (ex, someone else who's Kanade) i dont ever get bothered. bc my brain rationalizes it through 'multiverse theory.' TL;DR 'doubles' dont bother me because i believe in infinite alternate realities and that if someone else is also kanade then they're just a kanade from an alternate reality. does that make sense?

i still feel a disconnect between the kanade in prosekai and myself- the kanade i am. enough to where i can refer to her in the 3rd person comfortably. im not the same as her. there's differences, I can feel them. ill just refer to Kanade in the game as 'canon!kana'/'canon!me' because that's easiest;

the biggest difference between us is that, well, canon!me is human. she also isn't explicitly trans in any direction, and is also a hard worker. all of that is stuff that doesnt apply. im trans- im queer in every sense of the word. every inch of my identity is a little weird, a little 'out of the norm.' No part of me can be easily described to a lot of people. I do know, thankfully, that people in the real world can be accepting. My Nana supports xenogenders and she's in her early 70s. Granted, I am her main source of information on neurodivergency and queer identity, but I'm able to unbiasedly explain terms and gently guide her in the right direction. I would feel safe in admitting I am not human, and do not like physically being so. I'm lazy- admittedly due to depressive symptoms, but I do not like work. I generally just hate having to do physical activity- even just in-general work. The reason I'm almost-failing all of my classes in highschool is because I hate working for more than a few minutes at a time, especially consecutively.

Of course, I will say I am not a person who really experiences delusions. That isn't to say those who do are lesser or that I'm better- it's just a simple fact. I specify that because this is the 'piss on the poor' website. I can seperate my physical body right now as I physically am from my possible fictionkinnity- at this current moment I am (at the very least biologically) not a shapeshifter like I often call myself. I am human, I am biologically a perisex female, etc. I don't like to see myself like that. I am Uta, yes. But Uta isn't a human. Uta is Kanade Yoisaki. Uta is a shapeshifter. In some way or another, I am nonhuman- or otherwise 'different.' I always have been.

idk. im just kanade. i dont properly know what i mean by it, other than. well. I Am Kanade. and that's really all there is to it.lon

[selfundiagnosed]

Insane that my mom ran the most popular patrick stump archival blog on tumblr + was a full time lawyer + was raising two mentally ill kids + doing culinary arts school + having a cookie business. I think its her autism i wont lie. But now its all catching up to her and she has no energy which would be the ehlers danlos fault this time.. tried to convince her to steal her old url back but on cohost so she made an account but couldnt immediately make side blogs but boy oh boy. she would be giving the fall out boy fandom what they want and more. Shes like i cant do it again i have no idea how i did it before im like ma! its called having boundaries. Shes like i cant do that when i have a special interest its called autism. Im like right but queue posts for once a day and find 30 pictures from a photo set and boom one months worth of posting fall out boy and you can conserve your energy. But she doesnt know how to do her special interests in moderation. Im honestly just glad she went and accepted a bunch of access to her mega archive folder thingy. But shes so mad she doesnt have access to like her actual archive bc the website she used go archive everything changed their subscription plans and she has so many photos it would be like a zillion dollars she doesnt have 😭 like bogus i remember photo storing websites were so free. Take me back to 2010 for real :T Anyway she used to get so mortified when i told my friends as a teen about her blog i actually told her coworker once and her coworker somehow RETAINED the url and went home and looked at her blog and she was so upset at me 😭😭 but now like she kinda doesnt give a fuck anymore bc fall out boy was her special interest for an entire decade and she’s over it. Obviously still a big big fan but not in bandom anymore. Her new special interest is a band i introduced her to when i was 13 and its kinda cringe so i dont talk about it but she also ran an archival blog for THIS band and i told my friend at a sleepover who liked this band about her blog and they fucking FOLLOWED HER and shit bricks and my mom was MORTIFIED. But anyway yeah she doesnt gaf now if i tell people she was this blog and i even posted a tiktok about it once and people started doing detective work that would make her autistic self so proud…. Bc thats what she was good at! sleuthing stalking detective work on the band. Pete wentz privately answered several of her asks on tumblr i’ll see if she can send me the asks and their responses. But yeah she doesnt care anymore. her original url was scrubbed by tumblr and shes very angry about it bc it was an original bandom url for patrick stump so shes like wtf ever i dont wanna touch this im so mad. Which SAAAAME. ive done that so many times. She started permitting access to people who requested it for one of her photo archive website thingies she left in her last post. But yeaaaahhh… she was patrick stump for halloween in like 2008 and she won the costume contest bc she had rhe coolest sideburns and looked so much like him. My first ever concert was a fall out boy concert in spring 2007 i was 6 turning 7 within the next few months lemme just say the music video for carpel tunnel of love played on the screen as they played the song and my brother and i was so traumatized. But then immediately they played this aint a scene after that and we were like HELL YEAAAAAAAAA. And my brother (5 at the time) and i knew every single song and sang along and my mom went look at everyone else no one else knows these songs. You guys are so cool. And we looked around and yeah no one was singing the songs and were sooo excited! Oh and theres that one time she recorded us singing keep it simple by cobra starship and THEY PUT IT ON THEIR MYSPACE PAGE AT THE TOP WE FLIPPED SHIT. i wish THAT video was still up. Shes also met fall out boy so many times and walked away from patrick stump while he was talking to her bc she didnt want to take up his time at a meet and greet. Omg. so many memories. I was literally raised in online bandom thats so insane. Maybe thats why im a homosexual

[shanhelsing]

I stumbled across a post where you mentioned in tags wanting to quit FF14 for a month or so to see what FF11 was like. As someone who also did that once, I'm curious what your experience was?

I actually really enjoyed playing ff11 for a little while! I used Windower launcher (for a bunch of qol stuff, like higher resolution, 60 fps, and general addons) so my experience definately wasnt vanilla retail.  Compared to 14 I found 11 very slow lol but that made stuff really chill? Small stuff like how traveling by ship actually has a schedule so you cant just use them at anytime, and how some monsters have different behaviors on the time of day was really charming. But there was other stuff that sounds cool in concept, but was kinda crap to do lol. Like im not a very social person so there were quests that required a couple people (i think one specifically was needing a whm, blm, and a rdm) and i just never finished it bc i didnt wanna talk to anyone lol. Crafting also isnt fun like how it is in 14.

The one thing i really really didnt like though, was the combat which i learned after playing i could macro to make a little faster, but still is no where near as flashy and fast paced as 14 lol.

I lost a lot of steam on playing ff11 though bc when i went and tried to move my free trial account to a paid one I messed up somehow and the website for it is so confusing i ended up having to make a new character and replay through the all quests i had just done lol

Basically! I found Vana'diel to be a cool place but the combat is too slow for my attention span lol

[spikeinthepunch]

rebrand conflict

idk how to decide what is a good or bad decision in terms of like...wanting to rebrand. i wish i could count back to how long i have used "morrysillusion" overall, i dont have a specific date. but i know after the white/brown antelope/wolf fursona, i think i dropped "moreyytilatot"? i think i tried to just go by "morey" in some form (i recall "princemorry" url). and then i dropped the 'nisovinsillusion' url maybe in early 2016? but i also had the coffini url here for a good while after. i cant remember if i used morrysillusion outside of tumblr around that time so. idk...

and heres the thing-- i dont really feel disconnected from my username, its fine and i think its p cool. but also in my head i keep wanting to change it, and part of that is wanting to claim a super old username i have no bad associations with. and i think part of that is bc of all the ways i am trying to do the things i was denied through my younger years-- so i am just reliving a lot of nice things and recalling the vibes and online trend etc i had. but also like.... attitude? personality wise? i feel like im not reflecting that w my current "brand" so to speak. at the very least if i didnt change my username, i still dont feel like the current look is something i want. i think the urge on the username change is just an additional feeling to push away from what i have been under this name.

the username i keep wanting to fall back to is 'spikeinthepunch/spikedpunch' (had the short one on xboxlive and the long one on deviantart) which was a short lived username but has no negative relations to anything, and i wished i kept it for a bit longer. and its kind of an edgy username lol. but in my recent years of growing as an adult, moving out, and being my own person, i feel soooo different than how my accounts have been presenting me. i guess ive been like soft, simple, and stiff in presentation? i think i fell into this when i was thinking id keep doing art commissions etc in a "professional" way, and especially bc i was doing my CN internship around then and wanted to still look presentable for the industry when looking for jobs. and while i certainly would love to work in the creative industry potentially, i obviously dont need to keep up that Normal-er image, i never should have, but also at that age and time i didnt feel like i could be that way at all. i was far more nervous of people interpreting me badly, negatively, etc if i was more edgy or mature. i was young and not dealing with my issues and so fixated on trauma etc.

this is also lining up w my plans to rework my website too. and i think a lot of this feeling also comes along w my "mascot" who i think is lovely! but him being a "mascot" makes him.... very detached from me as a person. i havent had any sonas to relate to in almost over a year... and my mascot was never meant to be a sona, just a Guy to represent my vibe (the colors, aliens) and social media appearance. and i guess i dont like that vibe anymore. i havent even felt all too into the shift i made to Mikike just having a vague spacesuit either, i felt i was just forcing that in order to fit the simple minecraft skin format for readability. (if people were to draw my skin, making it plantigrade and less animal would be easier)

and of course an additional observation i have had in more recent times are manic episodes that make me uproot parts of my life and change a lot of stuff about my identity etc. it may not seem like that happens online but its bc i manage to hold back on changing things abt my online branding lol- but it often results in making sideblogs for whatever new fandom/media i attached to in my episode and irl changing my entire appearance to fit and much more (and promptly drop both in about a month or so- its why i have so many abandoned sideblogs). this is obviously the bigger issue bc its what makes it Very hard for me to not do this (n yes i am in a bit of an episode rn despite my medication so...). and shocker, so many of my username/url changes and failure to ever keep one long enough to form an identity is related to that as well! its a surprise i havent done it in years but it was the expectation to stay with one identity, one look, in order to be Normal and recognized in a professional way, and i dont like that.

making this post and dumping thoughts has me thinking on a solution. as i said i dont really feel detached from my username. but what i dont relate to the most now is the way i feel i have gotten stuck in presenting myself online, and as a "brand". i want to toss out my color scheme, my mascot, my outward attitude. i want to let myself actually present in a way i like and not in a way that feels "clean". when my wcrp got shut down i had to come to the idea of acceptance and letting go of things i cannot control. and the reality of what truly doesnt matter in terms of what people may think of me. that was a huge pressure left on me for YEARS thanks to 2014-16 tumblr mindset and it is so so much harder to break esp if you want to try and be a creator and build an audience. i felt like i had become aware of this, and i have, but i didnt really click the fact that i wasnt into my current online presence bc i was still living with a piece of that era.. the fear of getting popular and being 'called out' for something for years ago, that wasnt even serious or bad, feeling like i was stepping carefully everywhere even when nothing was wrong. this doesnt entirely tie to WHY i want to do all the above. its just an observation on one of the things that hold me back too. just staying the same and staying safe. i hardly ever post, and while its something i chose to do its also a 'bonus' to not giving people much things to read off of me and assume from too.

this is getting too long and i think i have my point. idk what im gonna do but im thinking a lot abt how i should take control of my online life.

[thescarlettdetective]

Hi im very depressed today so youre all getting my rant

You know for people who claim that taylor swift is mid at best yall seem to like complaining about her a lot. And trust me i have my criticisms of her and dont disagree that her supposedly progressive politics are watered down and weak and she doesnt put her money where her mouth is, but shes also not actively using her platform to cause harm like a lot of people are. (Jason aldean for example, largely popular country musician, recently released a song that alludes to lynching protestors and i saw stuff about that for like. A day) I think people who hail her as a beacon of progress are annoying and out of touch too but for people who claim not to give a shit about her i just dont get why you care so much when theres so many other things to talk about. It just seems like every other post i see on here is about how people cant stand her and like. Thats fine? Youre allowed to not like popular things this is very much the website for that. But its so constant. I dont see any other mediocre white musicians getting as much flak as she does because people rightfully dont give a shit. Like i do not understand the hype for say, Ariana Grande. And sure ive seen criticisms of her for appropriating black and latino fashion and looks which is absolutely true and should be discussed. But nowhere near at the volume i see it for taylor swift. And most stuff isnt even legitimate criticisms its just people saying how bland they find her music and like. Okay?

(I do personally believe a lot of those takes probably come from people whove only heard her admittedly boring sanitized and cringey radio hits and never delved into her lesser known stuff which is in my opinion far better but i digress)

Also im sorry but finding any opportunity to talk about how much you hate her is just as much of an obsession as those of us who take any chance we can to gush about her. And this isnt directed at anyone in particular its just wack to me how polarizing this woman is when shes Literally Just Some Dude. If shes so boring then why are you still talking about her. You dont have to. If there are people in your life literally shoving taylor swift down your throat take that up with them personally. I know shes hard to escape because yeah shes massively popular but so is. Idk. Harry Styles? And i know nothing about the man. Because i just ignore things i dont give a shit about and ive grown up past my 13 year-old selfs take of “everything thats popular is stupid and im very cool for not liking it”

All this is to say i wish everyone else were just. Normal. About taylor swift- swifties included- so i could be insane about her in peace

[moodr1ng]

btw ik this is the website for assuming everyone is usamerican but, outside of every other valid argument about it being a slur which is very much still in use and also just not being something everyone is gonna identify as and you cant force people to self-id a specific way.. its also cool to mention that some people arent gonna id as queer or recognize themselves in that term or agree to have it used to describe them and their entire community because its not a fucking word in their language and has no equivalent translation. and thats not terf ideology.

[cardboardslugs]

man as someone who's been roleplaying on twitter for upwards of a decade, *what the fuck happened?* like, ignoring the obvious Bad Website Issues, what the fuck happened to the accounts as a userbase??

Deadnaming the platform because fuck Musk, but It used to be that when you had an RP account on Twitter, you just did the Logical Thing and made it look like X Character made A Twitter Account. Like a Normal Person. You spoke and retweeted and did your silly little [shaking you vigorously, an ACTION] As Them. I didn't even mind the shift to literacy, *because it made sense*.

"It made much more sense," leaning on their elbow as they stare blankly across the room, "than whatever the fuck we were doing on old school at that point." They take a swig of gingerale, "and you could still be Stupid and Crack! And sure, some people saw this as you being a pretentious twat! and *maybe you were*! but still, it was a Natural and Sensical evolution to RP as a whole."

Me being a pretentious twat aside; whats come of RP now is that its all about the ✨️Aesthetics✨️ of it. Cool video edits of the characters, fancy washed out photos for your icon, the entirety of your pinned/bio in the fancy text that looks really pretty, an insistance that you only wanna rp with folks with experience.

I HAVE experience. In spades! again!! over a decade on that ONE PLATFORM ALONE!! And yet- I get told all the time that Im a gatekeepy piece of shit because people yell at me for not reading their pinned or knowing what character they play, When what i read in their display name and bio is just nonsense words like "sapphire seer" and a quote from somewhere that isnt even a notable one from the character. PLUS Their name, bio, and entire pinned (or even just the headings in their pinned), is in non-standard ascii/ fancy text. As in something someone who may use a screen reader is NOT capable of reading because these are characters with Legitimate Scientific Uses and no one who develops screen readers has any idea that someone may need to use it to read the nonsense of the Chronically Online. (Its me!!! Im the low vision person who uses a screen reader who cant read ANY of your important info!!!!!!)

Honestly idgaf if your profile is "pretty." If the content of your RPs is entirely incomprehensible to me because you decided to nest your information in qrts, information which youve already obsfucated by making it entirely inaccessible to the blind and low-vision... who do you expect to be interacting with you?

The WORST part is when people are upset I never followed them back- so I point out i cant read anything they have to say, and they just... laugh in my face and change nothing??? Like... please explain to me whats so funny about being intentionally inaccessible to the blind. I do not understand the joke. Then there are people who say I'm lying about the experience I have in RP because my "profile looks bad". There is no "standard" for how an RP account "should" look. I would just ask you be mindful of those of us in the room who are fucking Disabled.

I Dont know. Its a really really sad day when someone who loves doing something contemplates no longer doing it because the new folks coming in have made something that *isnt a contest* into a contest that is entirely ablist at its very core.

[infin-8-morphosis]

Monthly not-dead progress post here we go

Still working on my model. Theres too many little bits to say what I have and havent done (sooo much redoing) but umm in brief,

Oh this isnt brief whoops lets put a cut, tldr model good still wip, new map with Peirce Quinuncial projection, more website work, lots and lots of little half done things as usual

Functional eyes and eyelids, actual mesh is more or less 100% done, and partially unwrapped, but havent skinned it properly.

Partially rigged, but rigging will neeeveeer be finished. Thankfully my twisted setup with multiple rigs and multiple rigs inside those rigs actually seems to work...?

A brief rundown is:

The rig is made of 3 sets of identical bones: the scaler, poser, and deformer. The poser handles, most posing, shocking, and is more or less the 'crown' rig. The scaler doesnt move but scales, and said scale is copied to the poser. The deformer is the only set that deforms the mesh, it copies the location of the poser. So, Scaler scales the poser, poser moves the deformer. You should never need to view anything except the poser BUT and its a cool but, since the deformer is isolated from the poser, it also acts as a sort of pseudo FK rig, allowing fine adjustment of the posers IK positions. VERY handy!

There are other rigs, like an eye rig for just the eyes, a character-specific rig for the face (just not possible to use the same rig even with my scaling trick, and i dont want to have to worry about breaking the most important part of the mesh) and soon i will begin the harrowing task of a hair rig... for each hair. Fear and suffering ahead, but also funny hairdos.

Thankfully my trick to use geo nodes to fuse the meshes together seamlessly seems to work, but it seems to mess with uv's so still a roadblock. I nedd to really knuckle down on understanding geo nodes, and also get more fmailiar with uvs in the technical sense...

Also making an effort to completely ditch shape keys (FUCK shape keys) by using lattices instead. This is... unfortunately janky. But, useable. I dont care if it isnt perfect anyway, I just hate shape keys. The main trouble is how dogshit lattices are... They work so odd. And very destructively, so if I screw up a pose, tough shit...

Yet to step into the scary world of 'so will we actually model our characters with this' since at any point I can break things and will need to redo things... but also the sooner i start the sooner I catch things that dont work or need fixing...

Non-model wise I'm making pretty good progress on the map. As you probably dont know I have yet fucking again started from near scratch, but this time with the sexy as hell Peirce-Quincuncial map projection (go look it up its very good). This means a less warped map and also more sensible views of the poles, which were always a bit hacky on an equirectangular map since my planets 'poles' are on the equator. ie imagine a globe rotated 90° so the bottom and top are at the sides. Im feeling much better with how it fits together (even 'simulated' the plate tectonics a little to get them more accurate. Surpisingly my eyeballing it was about 80% correct!) but yet again the main headache is the actual height. Very, very hard to keep heights consistent and proportional.

Today I worked on my website! I had not checked on it in quite some time. Refamiliarised myself with its inner workings (loooove css. Very fun. Oddly fun battling wordpress to change things from its defaults that are often quite odd. For example, drop shadows only go to the bottom right. You cant alter it in the editor. Why??? So i just... edited the default shadow's css. Easy peasy. The hardest part was tracking down where exactly wordpress defined shadows. However there is some good to this since i dont need to add a class to things to give them my own shadow~) and have got it looking very smooth. Almost everything from my original website has been re-added, code wise. All that remains is the actual articles, and well, lots and lots more tweaking and new things. Still no mobile menu, that'll be a doozy... ah, also reimplemented tooltips properly. Verrry nice. Just not sure how the plugin manages colours... i will crack it open and study it...

Hmmm what else. I guess ive begun to organise my notes on everything, but i have attmepted this many times and it is a total mess... hoping this one sticks since i moved to using obsidian instead of google docs, so maybe i wont fuss over organisation and style as much and actually work on things.

Story wise eeerrrr. I mean. The problem i had is now, reversed, in that i used to have an end and no way of starting the plot, and now ive come up with a great hook that no longer works with the old ending... hrmm...

[lostacelonnie]

Thats entirely fair i don't think anyone trusts tumblr to work correctly tbh. Ive just been feeling the seasonal blues a bit. Ah heck why do teachers always do that instead of letting up on the workload. I do have a bit of chill time coming up thankfully which will be great because i need rest & to holiday shop. Oh heck i cant imagine that like. Americans are a mixed bag of overly friendly & minders of their own business but a place where its all overly friendly would be a culture shock to me. That feels like the universal experience with talking to native spanish speakers just. Yeah we can guess kinda what's bein said through context & gesticulating. Finding a few recipes you can do & rolling from there is just how it goes i imagine. But ive been cooking for many years so i had to branch out to keep some variety otherwise meals would be boring. I have wireless earbuds but only because like. People talk to me often when im not expecting it & it bothers me a lil because the mental illnesses so its easier to listen to stuff & use that as my reason for not hearing them. Australia truly is the land of wild shit. Its got that category on lock. Wow thats like. Complete spectrum opposite teachers? Almost? Maybe? Though how does a math teacher not know counting was she just tired one day or is that common? Thats entirely fair i don't think anyone trusts tumblr to work correctly tbh. Ive just been feeling the seasonal blues a bit. Ah heck why do teachers always do that instead of letting up on the workload. I do have a bit of chill time coming up thankfully which will be great because i need rest & to holiday shop. Oh heck i cant imagine that like. Americans are a mixed bag of overly friendly & minders of their own business but a place where its all overly friendly would be a culture shock to me. That feels like the universal experience with talking to native spanish speakers just. Yeah we can guess kinda what's bein said through context & gesticulating. Finding a few recipes you can do & rolling from there is just how it goes i imagine. But ive been cooking for many years so i had to branch out to keep some variety otherwise meals would be boring. I have wireless earbuds but only because like. People talk to me often when im not expecting it & it bothers me a lil because the mental illnesses so its easier to listen to stuff & use that as my reason for not hearing them. Australia truly is the land of wild shit. Its got that category on lock. Wow thats like. Opposite spectrum of teachers maybe? Though how does she not know counting was she just tired one day? Noted for sure ill pay closer attention to the honkai meta. Yknow i hope what a herscherr is gets explained because i still dont know. Oh thats cool to know i will make a note of that polish phrase to try & remember linguistics can be fun. Ah yeah for sure they actually put effort into like. Making neuvillette have a story & be interesting & it shows. Only genshin male i care for probably. Oh hey stigmatism gang. Im farsighted with a stigmatism also so same hat. I always forget about talents & weapon leveling but it works out its all good. A 7 am as well jeesh are you good? This arc is very good & i cant wait to see where it goes wataoshi owns my attention now. Oh yeah i saw you mention noita how is it? Damn. Thats a lot of lore shoutout to himeko the mvp. Love her. What exactly is a honkai anyways are they like. The antimatter legion from star rail. Or well are the legion like the honkai beasts? Also do you have any seele lore? Also also glad you saw the polish post i had hope you would

this website will forever be scuffed JSJDSKDJF. and dont worry me too. its Getting Bad Again but soon its gonna be the winter solstice and i always start feeling better when the days get longer again. and god yeah fr...... we literally have so many grades already CAN THEY CHILL. luckily i got sick again so i didnt have to go to school today and im guessing im not gonna have many lessons to catch up on since its our last Proper day before the holidays and we have pretty easy subjects on wednesday so. we chillen. yeah same thank GOD for the holidays. tho im gonna have to deal with my family for like an entire week which. auuugh. dont wanna. but oh well ill get through it Somehow. AND GOD YEAH with being polish is much more noticable bc ppl here just really will avoid any unnecessary interaction with strangers [which is perfectly fine by me i like not being bothered]. but yeah the gesticulation Does help a lot in communicating. at the end of the day, as long as the message gets conveyed, it doesnt really matter How that was accomplished. i usually order takeout to my school since we have a program like that so i dont really have to cook that much, but yeah i should also probably branch out SJDKGK i dont know howw much longer i can survive on scrambled eggs every time i cant eat at school. yeah fair, i use my headphones to avoid conversations as well, tho luckily i have friends that are generally chill about the fact i will just. Not talk sometimes so i dont even have to do that a lot. and yeah we actually joke about how exactly opposite they are JSKFJG and its. a common occurence. but then again my school is just Not that great so nobody is surprised. good luck with the meta!!! its hellish at first but gets a bit easier with every built valkyrie so just trust the process. AH IM SORRY i unfortunately have a bad habit of using honkai specific terms as if theyre common knowledge. my bad. but essentially, the honkai itself is like. a force, i guess is the best word? that, despite being non-sentient, has one goal: destroying humanity. it grows along with human progress. the antimatter legion is not a bad comparison, actually! and a herrscher is a person thats been, in a way, possessed by the honkai to obtain incredible amounts of power to try and carry out the honkais objective of destruction. herrschers have different. specialties, you could say? some of them are more obvious [like the herrscher or wind, thunder, fire, ice etc] and some are more abstract [the herrscher of the void, origin, domination, for example]. in the current era, with enough willpower and self control, those powers can be used by a herrscher without them losing their humanity. it gets a bit more complicated than that but thats the basic rundown. ANYWAY COMING BACK linguistics will always be fascinating to me....... especially etymology. i love etymology. AND YEAH SAME i thought the day would never come in which i would care about a genshin guy and yet. also hey were matching......... i used to also always forget to level up talents but since traces are a bit more accentuated in the star rail tut it kinda carried over to genshin for me i guess. 7 am classes have caused me to go through all stages of grief but, just like those, i have reached Acceptance. at least theres less people on the bus so i can sit down. AND YEAH YEAH YEAH THE LOVE SCALE ARC HAS ALWAYS BEEN MY FAVORITE....... i love manaria. terrible wingwoman. very charming and handsome. and about noita yes ive been playing it. a Lot recently. roguelikes are fun theyre surprisingly making me More patient than i was instead of destroying my psyche like everyone said they would. and since noita is a finnish game im genuinely having a lot of fun learning the pronunciation of a lot of the enemy names. HIMEKO REALLY IS THE MVP FOREVER AND ALWAYS. I LOVE HER. i do in fact have seele lore and as previously i shall put it under the cut!! and im actually designed to sense and reblog all polish posts o7

as with himeko, i wouldnt consider myself an Expert on seele lore [if you have any further questions and/or want a more in-depth analysis of her, i would redirect you to tumblr user crowties] BUT i do know it. decently well. it goes without saying that this is also gonna contain massive spoilers.

so, seele's [as well as bronya's!] backstory is mainly showcased in the azure waters manga [although, do be warned that it features themes such as: physical and psychological abuse, child soldiers, pedophilia, and [minor on minor] attempted sa]. but moving on from all that.

seele grew up in cocolia's orphanage, in siberia, where she also met bronya after she was picked up by cocolia. she was also born with a certain condition, being a natural stigma [stigmata in the honkaiverse are manifestations of honkai energy which people are very rarely born with, but schicksal for example uses artificial ones to boost valkyries' combat capabilities]. that very stigma belonged to the herrscher of death in the previous era and is fully sentient! im gonna call her veliona so that its harder to mix them up but do know that theyre both referred to as seele in the game [and its actually a pretty important part of their identity that theyre both seele]. now the thing about seele and veliona is that you think theyre gonna be a terrible did stereotype and then theyre. Not. as in veli, at first, does act like "the evil alter" but shes actually just pretty mean but wants to protect seele. since seele is just. Very fragile due to being, you know, a timid 12 y/o.

in the orphanage, another one of the kids was sin mal! she exists solely to be a terrible person but i heard that wasnt the case in guns girl z so i defend her anyway. sin was jealous over the fact that bronya and seele became so close despite seele being weak, so she PUSHED BRONYA DOWN THE FUCKING STAIRS AND BROKE HER LEGS???? shes that kind of person i guess. seele actually saw it happen but she was too scared to do anything. which, understandable! sin is extremely volatile.

seele then gets Kidnapped by child sex traffickers but bronya singlehandedly finds her and murders everyone responsible. seele is pretty horrified because 1. bronya [also 12] just killed a bunch of people in front of her and 2. she saw a manifestation of veliona that made her feel Happy that this is happening. veli is not very good at communication and also genuinely considers herself a terrible person at that point in time so that doesnt help with the evil alter allegations but oh well.

then. cocolia, at the request of anti entropy [allegedly?] starts carrying out child experiments, meant to make people achieve 100% honkai resistance. the people selected are bronya and sin, but seele volunteers in bronyas place since theyre pretty dangerous. right before that, however, sin attempts to assault seele, which veliona does Not let slide, so she rips out sins tooth and then traps her consciousness in an illusion in which she pushes her down the stairs and then slices off her fingers. good riddance.

however, the x-10 experiment Fails and seele falls into the sea of quanta, going missing. tho right as its about to happen, veliona actually uses a lot of her power to let seele see the sea, because she made a promise with bronya that they would go together someday. right as shes about to reach bronya, her power runs out and they completely disappear into the sea.

when bronya finds out about about this, she wants to take the x-10 test herself to try and find seele. cocolia doesnt want to let her go so that SHE DOESNT LOSE MORE CHILDREN, but bronya shows that shes gonna kill herself if cocolia doesnt agree and so she goes. during her test, she. actually manages to reconnect with seele for a while! they kiss and make a promise that theyll see each other again. however, due to bronyas legs still not being fully healed, she actually gets pretty badly hurt [with her legs needing prosthetics, as well as damage to her emotive circuits] during the test and is forcefully disconnected. seele manages to manifest bronya a robot project bunny. somehow. it helps her move and is also a giant cannon.

after this, seele and veliona float in the sea of quanta for 4 years. they grow quite close to each other during this, tho still maintain some distance because veli is just. not very sociable. veliona also makes a deal with an entity called the serpent [which i believe was confirmed to be kevin? but dont quote me on that] because he promises that hell get them out of the sea if they help him escape as well. veli is fully aware hes taking advantage of her but she has to try everything. when bronya jumps into the soq during the herrscher of reason arc, she manages to find seele! at first, velis deal with the serpent forces her to fight bronya, but during cyberangel seele and bronya end up working together. seele is also the one who makes bronya survive contact with the core of reason. as theyre escaping from the sea, bronya almost gets left behind, so seele and veliona achieve full unity during dual ego [IM INSANE ABOUT THEM. I AM INSANE] and they leave the sea.

after that, seele is admittedly Not that present in the main story [tho she does appear a couple of times!] until the moon arc and later the salt snow holy city arc, which is also the best part of the game because i said so and i am always right. SERIOUSLY THO SALT SNOW ARC IS MY FAVORITE IT IS SO GOOD IT IS SO-

anyway. seele and veliona are the protagonists in this one! i would so happily tell you the story but im also unfortunately too tired to give a detailed description of THE ENTIRE ARC so ill keep things short. when dispatched for a mission in nagazora, seele [and susannah! susannah is in this arc. i love her] gets dragged into a bubble universe by misteln [who, due to some events in the moon arc, veliona has extreme beef with]. but its actually a pretty bad thing because, due to the unique structure of the universe [that being, its actually two universes overlapping, one acting as the normal world and the other as the afterlife], seele and veli get separated. this causes significant mental distress to both of them. however, eventually they manage to reconnect! which also accidentally makes them the sage of the universe [a special role, usually reserved for one person] since they fulfill the criteria of being able to traverse between life and death. the problem is, theres..... already a sage....... and the universe starts collapsing. after a fight, the previous sage gives up her powers and seele gets sealed in her tower to act her role. it turns out that her becoming the sage wasnt what actually triggered the collapse, and so the team [consisting of seele, veli, susannah, kira, niggurath, senti, misteln, prometheus, vita, and schrodinger] works together to try and prevent it in another way. a Bunch Of Shit happens which i love very deeply but would also take way too long to explain, and seele gets separated from veliona, eventually becoming the herrscher of death [but, vita decides that seele is a far too gentle person to be called that, and so she becomes the herrscher of rebirth]. they manage to save the universes, and also free vita from being a pawn to sa, the force destroying the universe. they get to return home after that :)

i am extremely normal about seele and veliona [they give me mental illness]

[pesterloglog]

Aradia Megido, Dave Strider, Tavros Nitram

Act 5, page 3481-3492

apocalypseArisen [AA] began trolling turntechGodhead [TG]

AA: hello!

TG: hey

AA: i think its absurd i never introduced myself to you in all that time i spent moping around the lab

AA: guess i wasnt in a very good mood

AA: hi dave my names aradia

TG: christ

TG: youre a fan of one of my websites arent you

TG: what asshole gave you my chumhandle

TG: also what was your favorite thing i did you liked

TG: and what did you think was so great about it

TG: also

TG: asl???

AA: um

AA: 6 a girl and a place very close to you

AA: in fact

AA: i could visit you right now if you would like

TG: oh holy shit ok youre a troll

TG: only trolls say theyre six i dont know whats up with you and that dumb fake age

AA: to be fair it translates to the same age as you which at the moment is 12 is it not

TG: makes no sense bye

AA: understanding disparities in the flow of time should be easy for people like us let alone understanding disparities in such pedestrian things as units

AA: i am 6 sweeps old one sweep is a little more than 2 years you dummy!

TG: cool story

AA: look it is either the truth or i am just someone who is being a bit playful what is the harm in that

TG: ok so 2=6 awesome joke hahahaha

TG: or wait maybe it was just a waste of time

TG: you people think im made of the stuff

AA: :D

AA: i know you arent

AA: but i am

TG: what

AA: maid of time

AA: whereas you are the knight of the very same cosmic faculty

AA: it would seem we have very little in common dave

AA: when in fact we have very much

TG: yeah

TG: i think

TG: im gonna shut off my phone now cya

AA: yes

AA: thats definitely what you did the first time we had this conversation

AA: so i will wait patiently while you realize thats not what youre going to do this time

TG: uh

TG: what

TG: the fuck

AA: dave describe to me why you are now incredulous please

TG: i remember this

TG: i remember shutting off my phone and never talking to you again

TG: but

TG: im still talking

TG: whats going on

AA: of course you remember that

AA: this is a memory

TG: no its a dream

TG: im asleep

TG: or am i

TG: what is going on here

AA: come to the window

TG: why

AA: because im outside

TG: bs

AA: take a look

TG: i dont see anything out there

AA: that iiis

AA: becaaause

AA: im not out there anymore!

AA: turn around

TG: oh sup

TG: looks like youre a fairy

AA: yeah

TG: thats cool

TG: these arent my shades anymore

TG: john gave me these new ones for my bday

TG: i remember that

TG: and i wasnt wearing this shirt

TG: it was this one

TG: howd it get like that

AA: try to remember

TG: i cant

TG: wait

TG: i wasnt wearing this actually

TG: i was wearing this suit

TG: no wait

TG: it was a black one

AA: are you sure

TG: yeah

TG: and i was playing sburb

TG: thats right

TG: and then i went to sleep at some point

TG: which is why im asleep now

TG: but

TG: if im dreaming

TG: then why am i not awake as my dream self

AA: why indeed!

TG: shit

TG: this wasnt the suit i was wearing

TG: it was this ugly fucking rag

AA: yes

AA: i think it looks pretty nice but go on

TG: and i went to take a nap

TG: terezi said id reach god tier

TG: or i guess show me why i wouldnt

TG: did it work is this part of the process somehow

AA: no

AA: sorry

TG: so then

TG: its just a stupid pointless dream

AA: not exactly

TG: wait

TG: oh yeah

TG: i woke up

TG: and then

TG: welp

TG: so then

TG: im dead

AA: yes

TG: then this isnt a memory or a dream at all

TG: its the afterlife

AA: yes and no

AA: yes and 2 nos!

AA: it is the afterlife

AA: but what is happening now is taking place in a bubble which is accessible to the living through dreams under the right conditions

AA: and it is also your memory

AA: the entry point for any bubble is always a memory

AA: either a memory of the dead

AA: or a memory of the living dreamer come to visit!

AA: but once you realize it is not just a memory

AA: what happens next is up to you

TG: ok

TG: what is going on over here then

TG: is this some disturbing ghost hallucination should i start slapping myself or what

AA: no this actually did happen

TG: i dont remember this

AA: thats because it isnt your memory

AA: this is alpha dave

AA: the one who chose not to take the nap which led to your death

TG: fuck

TG: lucky bastard

TG: so then i guess terezi tricked me

AA: did she

AA: didnt you ask for this

TG: it would have been cool to know if picking one option would definitely kill me pointlessly so yeah

TG: but i guess i kept giving her shit about it and i knew she was kind of crazy and morbid anyways so whatever

TG: is

TG: bro dead there

AA: evidently

TG: like in reality

TG: like thats a thing that really happened

TG: also

TG: is reality still a thing that means something can that be a question on the table too

AA: yes yes and yes

AA: yes it can be on the table and yes reality still means something

AA: and yes your guardian did die

TG: well

TG: dammit

TG: what did i do wrong

TG: aside from getting my ass killed in the most retarded way possible

AA: nothing

AA: all is well and as it should be

TG: whats he doing

TG: alpha me

AA: what would you be doing there if you were him

TG: i am him

AA: even better!

TG: i dunno

AA: would you be upset

TG: yeah

TG: sorta

AA: then maybe what you are doing is grieving

AA: in whatever way that comes naturally to you

TG: maybe

AA: you are lucky to be able to

AA: i could not for a long time

AA: but now that i can again im so relieved

AA: because i have discovered there is no reason to grieve!

TG: ok

TG: am i talking to someone there

AA: looks like it

TG: who

AA: who do you suspect you would be talking to in this situation

TG: probably

TG: terezi i guess

AA: maybe she is helping you through this

TG: i dunno

TG: would she do that

AA: you were helping her werent you

TG: was i

AA: i think so

AA: the living need each others help

AA: just like the dead do

AA: alpha dave still has a long way to go

AA: hes still not at ease with his mortality

AA: but people like us have to be!

AA: we have to be prepared to die a thousand deaths before our quest is complete

AA: the master we serve demands it

TG: so

TG: im just one dead dave offered up to the time god

AA: pretty much

TG: what about the other dead daves

AA: they come here too

AA: in their own bubbles

AA: you may cross paths with them if you wish

TG: uh

TG: i think

TG: im up to my neck in dave already

TG: just being one

AA: ha

AA: i know the feeling :)

TG: still doesnt seem right though

TG: why are you even here like why are you showing me this

AA: im not showing you im just visiting your bubble

AA: it projects your thoughts and memories

AA: as well as other things relevant to you much like the clouds do in skaia

TG: but like

TG: if im seeing this

TG: shouldnt i be able to do something about it

TG: or stop it from happening or

TG: i dont know like anything to keep helping my friends

TG: what do i do

AA: nothing

AA: none of this is your business anymore

AA: its time to move on

TG: where are we now

AA: oh look this was my hive!

AA: before it was destroyed

TG: oh so this is the trollplanet

TG: pretty cool not really what i pictured

AA: what did you picture

TG: i dont know its more subdued

TG: i pictured a lot more mayhem like

TG: a bunch of trolls flying around in little grub pods constantly screaming at each other through bullhorns shaped like buckets

AA: thats very silly and a little perverse

TG: hahaha

AA: but actually that sounds like what it might have been like on some parts of the planet sooo

TG: can we not go to those parts

AA: ill put in a good word with your bubble about it

TG: awesome

TG: so what am i supposed to do now that im dead

TG: what is like

TG: the primary activity here

TG: that ghosts get their shit worked up over

TG: like

TG: where are the fucking hauntoffs at is what im asking

AA: i dont know about hauntoffs

AA: but there is plenty of time to satisfy various curiosities you might have about existence and whatnot

TG: boring

AA: is it

TG: just kidding that sounds cool

AA: oh! yes

TG: what else

AA: there are all sorts of friends to meet

AA: ones you already know and ones you dont

AA: there is plenty of time for just about anything

AA: lots and lots of time

AA: enough time to understand that time isnt much of anything at all

TG: it isnt

AA: time is like a game

AA: just one fun game in realitys cupboard which is full of them

AA: its the one we are the best at!

AA: while other people are better at the other games

AA: but when all the games are back in the cupboard everyone is about the same

AA: and games are fun but sometimes you dont realize how much fun you were having until theyre all over

AA: and sometimes you look back and realize for some stupid reason you werent having any fun at all!

AA: then you laugh

TG: ha

TG: haha

TG: i bet you meant a laugh a whole lot less shitty than that

AA: that laugh will suffice

AA: hey!

AA: want to see inside my hive

TG: yeah sure

TG: well

TG: how about later

TG: not that that doesnt sound cool but i kind of want to just go home

TG: and i guess chill for a while cause i guess it was all a bit much

TG: if thats ok and i guess also possible

AA: it is quite possible and more than ok

AA: it seems you have a hiveguest dave

TG: aw hell no

TG: is this who i think this is

AA: tavros has been looking forward to meeting you

AT: hEYYY,

AT: fIRST, oK, i THINK YOU'RE FANTASTIC,

AT: wHICH IS TO SAY, jUST AN ENVIABLY COOL GUY, wHO i ADMIRE,

AT: lET'S PUT THAT COMPLIMENT ON THE TABLE WHERE WE CAN BOTH SEE IT,

TG: holy shit

AT: lOOKS LIKE i FOUND ANOTHER POINT IN TIME TO BOTHER YOU,

AT: wHEN, i GUESS,

AT: yOU ARE MORE EMOTIONALLY SUSCEPTIBLE,

AT: }:)

TG: dude

TG: are those sick fires youre packing there

TG: you best not be bringin that fire into my bubble less you plan on dropping that shit

AT: oHH, bRO,

AT: tHESE ARE WITHOUT ANY CONFUSION TO BE NOTED AS SOME TRULY UNHEALTHY INCENDIARIES,

AT: tHEY ARE IN ABOVE AVERAGE NEED OF MEDICAL ATTENTION,

AT: sO, iN OTHER WORDS, jUST TO COMPLETE THE ANALOGY, i HOPE YOU KNOW A LICENSED PHYSICIAN,

TG: i am your general fucking practitioner and doctors orders are to shut up and burn down my goddamn office

TG: ill break your brittle ass like a graham cracker and well roast smores over the flaming debris have i made myself clear

AT: aH, hAHA, yES, aND,

AT: cERTAIN FEATURES OF YOUR PALE ANATOMY MAY SERVE AS THE MARSH MALLOW INGREDIENT, nEEDED FOR THE MOLTEN SNACK,

AT: i WILL PROVIDE THE FUDGE, }:D

TG: dude

TG: gross

TG: so aradia just so were clear

TG: this is like a hellbubble right

TG: its my eternal punishment to have shitty rapoffs with this tool forever is that it

AA: yes you figured out the mystery!

TG: i guess i had it coming for a flagrant lifetime spent being unbelievably fucking incredible at rap and just about practically everything else

TG: except not dying

AA: you may think so but then again you have not faced team charge in a match of slam poetry have you

AT: oHHHH, yESSS,

AA: just kidding im no good at slam poetry haha sorry

AT: oHHHH,

AT: oH, }:(

TG: so is he dead

TG: he looks dead

AA: yes hes dead

TG: what about you

TG: you dont look dead

TG: are you dreaming

AA: no i am wide awake

AA: and i physically stand before you in person!

TG: so

TG: youre not dead

AA: oh no

AA: i am very much alive

AA: and i intend to stay that way :)

[freevoidman]

Not tge submissiin srender

I cant say i know of any police force or anything like it that doesn't have corruption. They are all prone to it.

But not all are as bad as in america. There are some places where the police in general are alot more trust worthy, and corruption and horrible people are dealt with better.

So in some places its not nearly as much of an issue because its not so out of control like it is in america. Its not seen as evil to become a police officer, and depending on the circumstances i guess they actually do their job properly and dont causebso much trouble.

Then theres the part where its just fantasy. Alot of people like reading about police actually being good people, whether its for the action and crime solving, or because its nice to pretend and think about how life would be if police were good. Americans take this as some sort of "pro-police propaganda" when all it is, is a fantasy.

Yeah, I'm not denying that some countries have less/handle corruption better than in America. But at the same time, making a blanket statement of "other countries don't have the same pesky problems with corruption" kind of undermines that entire point.

Like, I'm fully aware that other countries have better relationships with the police than in America. That doesn't mean that there are no other countries in which cops are not corrupt or violate human rights besides America. We see this all the time in Britain, France, and Hong Kong with their recent protests. I feel like this is a really boiled down argument of "America has some of the worst known racism in the world!" while other countries are just as racist, it's just that America is, arguably, the most vocal about said racism.

I think, no matter what media you watch, it's going to be colored by your personal experiences. That's a fundamental part of critical thinking when watching shows and discussing them with others. And unfortunately for others, a large (and very vocal) portion of most English-based social media websites are used by Americans, whose experiences are 1) they live in a country where cops regularly abuse their authority and 2) the media in their country depict human rights violations as a good thing, so long as a Good Cop is doing it. Even "fantasy" media in the US about "what if cops were fun and quirky" still has them depicting rights violations as a good thing (ie Brooklyn 99), so USAmericans are primed to watch any media with police involved and have a biased stance (which can be stupid, especially when they apply US-specific laws to non-US shows, that's something even I'm not cool with).

With all of that being said, I don't think that all media ever has to depict things "realistically." You can absolutely watch fun cops shows that indulge in that fantasy of "what if cops were Good, Actually" and separate that from reality. This isn't a perfect 1:1 match here, but I don't watch Tokyo Mew Mew and think Ichigo should sue Ryou and the Mew Project for altering her DNA without her permission, which is a massive violation of her autonomy because... it's a magical girl anime. Similarly, though I talk about RWBY and all the various crimes the main protagonists commit, I defend Ironwood and his military in that show because they actually do stuff right until the writers did a heel turn in V8 in order to make Ironwood look like he's insane and lost his mind. However, those ideas of Cops/Government Being Shitty still exist and can be discussed, though there wouldn't be much to gain from beating a dead horse.

Long, dumb rant aside, I think you can totally watch any country's version of a cop show and have fun with it. You can also complain about others taking media too seriously, so long as you aren't a massive asshole to others about it. My problem with the submitter's points were based on the premise "these things don't happen outside of America" which is just completely untrue, and it derails the entire argument as a result.

[jaredthebc]

hey its totally cool if u prefer the og polyam flag, but a lot of photosensitive people have discussed visual accessibility issues with the og because of the eyestrain. im photosensitive and cant use the og for that reason. however, i think being able to find personal connection in different flags is wonderful and everyone can use whichever ones they feel most connected to, so if the og is what u are more connected to then totally keep using it ❤️

OHHHH that actually makes a lot of sense! Apologies, never thought of it that way. It wasn't really explained on the website referenced, hence why I didn't understand what the issue was. Thank you for the polite explanation and apologies if I came off as ignorant, very glad to learn

Personally, I still have more connection with the OG flag, though if needed I can use the new one (or possibly I can mildly edit the old one to have less eyestrain)

Thanks again for the explenation!

[chimerabytes]

One thing I do wish I was better at was integrating myself into communities and stuff. Not to Be Like This on main but Ive always had a lot of anxiety around and struggled with cementing myself into various communities, like Discord chats and forums and such. I grew up on the days of Xat, AIM and AOL chatrooms. And uh, being a kid in that timeframe was really weird!

I also remember dA Chat too. Those were kinda cool. I dont use deviantART anymore (I deactivated all my accounts when they first started redesigning the website. I thought it looked like total garbage.) so I have no idea if that still exists.

Anyway. Even now with the advent of Discord making it a hell of a lot easier to just schwoop into any kind of place on the internet and meet other people... Eh, I dunno, I've always found I never really stuck around much in most places!

Ive been a member of Anxious Destiny Gamers (which is an AWESOME Destiny group, by the way. Very friendly community and I dont regret joining 🥰) for like.? two years? now? And I feel like thats the first group within the last couple years Ive really felt comfortable staying in, even though my interest in Destiny has massively dwindled over the last couple months.

Ive tried to reach out and join other communities... Ive tried to join multiple selfship discords, multiple furry groups, hell I've even found Discord chats for my own city and state! But I rarely talk in any of them and usually leave either a couple days or weeks after I join them.

But I occasionally go on sprees where I join a bunch of groups related to my interests... Only to quickly regret that decision and leave.

And in one case, I left a furry group a couple hours after joining because it weirdly came off like an abusive and controlling cult. Ie. Shaming people for leaving without announcing their reason for why, as if anyone needs to announce any reason for that at all? (And please note that while there are definitely other groups like this, the vast majority of furry-centric groups are genuinely really nice places. I just never meshed with most of the people in them.)

I dont really know what part of me compels these on and off desires. I cant tell if its my anxiety or something else. I guess Ive never really felt an inherent sense of attachment or belonging to groups, even though Ive tried very hard to remedy it.

I guess I also just feel like that, these days, people who join mostly to 'lurk' or are shy and don't really talk much often get scorned or pushed away from what could turn out to be really good experiences. Even if you don't talk much, getting a sense for these communities and how they run, how they function, is actually kinda nice in a way? I hope that doesn't sound too weird.

Anyway. I dont know what the point of this whole post was. I'm not sure there even IS a point. And there probably is a better place for this.