#still don't want to fucking hear it now. it's been almost 8 years but fuck off.

[smusherina]

yard work - chapter 7 (regina george x reader)

fandom: Mean Girls (all media)

pairing: Regina George x OFC/Reader

summary: You'd been in the same class as Regina George since kindergarten. You'd lived on the same street even longer. Once upon a time, when life was sandbox disputes and who got the swing first arguments, you'd even been friends. Now, in junior year of high school, you doubted she even remembered you. The same couldn't be said about you. You definitely remembered her.

warnings(s): i feel like the theme is pretty established by now, still homophobia. negative talk about weight. a brief segment about Mr George's A+ parenting. as in, he's bad at it.

chapter 1 / chapter 2 / chapter 3 / chapter 4 / chapter 5 / chapter 6 / chapter 8

You accosted Cady Heron after Ms Norbury's calculus class. You took her by the purse strap and hauled her to the janitor's closet, ignoring all her indignant chirping.

You'd been stewing the whole class, glaring daggers at the back of her stupid orange hair.

"You've crossed a line." You said once the door shut behind you. She was cowering against the wall, looking like a cornered animal. "Those fucking Kälteen bars were too much."

"What? What're you talking about?" She tried to lie, to seem tough like the popular girl she was so desperately trying to be.

"I'm talking about the so-called weight loss bars you gave to Regina." You hissed, stepping closer so you loomed over her. You really wanted to get your point across. "It wasn't very hard to search up what they're really for. You don't mess with someone's body like that."

"She had it coming!" Cady finally relented, looking up at you defiantly. "She- she took Aaron from me and made out with him right in front of me all the time and then she just threw him away!" She yelled, hands clenched to fists and a red flush of rage blotching her freckled face. "All she does is spite me." She added with venom.

"Aaron isn't some trophy for either of you to own." You implored, trying to not react to her raised, aggressive tone. It would be mortifying to cry now. "I'm not saying she didn't do anything wrong, but Cady that's fucked up. You need to apologize."

"Why? Why in the world should I apologize to her? She hasn't apologized to anyone even though she's probably done something to everyone in this hellhole."

"Two wrongs don't make a right. I know that's cliche as hell, but what did you think you'd achieve?"

"We were trying to topple her. Make her lose her status. By making her gain weight, well, she'd get all ugly."

You shivered in repulsion. Regina had already sunken her claws deep into this girl.

"I... I honestly don't know what to say to you." Defeated, you said one last thing: "I'm out. I'm not taking part in your scheming anymore and I don't want to hear about it."

"It's not like you did anything!" Cady huffed.

"Exactly." You sighed. "I didn't do shit." She looked confused at that, but you didn't rightly care.

With that, you stepped out of the closet. This would probably be the only instance you'd step out of the closet, figuratively, in high school. A small victory, maybe.

"What were you doing in the janitor's closet?" You almost bumped into Regina.

Too stunned to hear her speak to you in public, you didn't get to answer before Cady stepped out as well. Her face was still flush and her clothes were a bit messy from you dragging her through the hall.

Regina's expression turned stormy. She seemed to coil back, tension rising in her body as she took stock of the state of you. You could do nothing but stare as she levelled Cady with a murderous look.

When she turned to you, you nearly flinched back. Not only was she angry, furious really, but you'd hurt her. It was clear in the way she was breathing hard and heavy, how she was shuddering the lightest bit, how her lips pinched together. When Regina was angry, only angry, she went cold. It wasn't like this. This was something worse.

"Reg," You tried to say something and went to touch her arm.

"Don't." Don't call me that. Don't touch me. She hissed, hurt turning to fear as she looked around you. People weren't staring, luckily you hadn't caused a scene, but there were always eyes on Regina.

You looked down at your shoes and, with great reluctance, walked away. It was considerably harder to keep from crying now.

Not feeling up to geography, you went to your usual spot. The number of cigarettes you smoked in a day was starting to get a little too much. You couldn't find it in yourself to care now.

Once you arrived behind the bleachers, you tossed your backpack onto the grass and sat on it. The ground was cold and getting colder by the day. Soon enough it'd snow.

What the fuck were you doing? You'd impulsively confronted Cady, angry for Regina's sake, but you hadn't been able to really say anything to her. You'd asked her what she was trying to achieve, and all the while you had no idea of what you wanted.

You wanted everything to be okay. That was vague. You wanted Regina to be not nice, but herself. She wasn't vindictive by nature. You wanted her to apologize, but couldn't open your fucking mouth and say that. You wanted Cady to stay the fuck away from her, same went for Janis and Damien.

You weren't so dumb as to expect you'd be able to convince anyone. You didn't have any weight in these people's lives. You barely existed. For Regina to change, something drastic needed to happen. Something like a fall from grace, you grudgingly admitted. It would change her, but it would also hurt her. You didn't want to do that. Maybe if her dad changed. Then again, even if he changed that wouldn't erase the past. Maybe Cady could move her somehow. Regina had taken her under her wing, after all, though for misguided reasons. Maybe there was something there.

(The pattern was hard to miss. Regina rounding up pretty girls around her. When you no longer measured up to her standards, she got Janis. Then she threw her away. Eventually, she found Karen and Gretchen. Now, Cady was next.)

You heard approaching footsteps and crossed your fingers, hoping it wasn't a teacher. Soon enough, Janis 'Imi'ike appeared before you in all her gothy glory.

"Gimme one." She demanded as she squatted down in front of you.

"That'll be fifty cents." You said back. There was only one person you'd share your pack with for free.

Janis tsked. "Fine." She reached into her pockets and after a bit of rifling handed you a coin. You pocketed it and offered the pack to her.

"Got a lighter?" She asked with the stick in her mouth. You tossed it to her. "Thanks."

You took the lighter back. She didn't say anything for a while. You could appreciate that, even if you didn't want to talk to her at all.

"So, you're out."

"Yup." You took a drag. "Espionage isn't for me."

"Even though you ruined all our plans?" You'd hoped they hadn't realized you were the mole, but you supposed that'd been naïve.

"Yeah. I'm not built for it." You looked at the slowly burning smoke between your fingers. "Y'know, you're not so different."

"What? Me and who?" She adjusted on her perch. The black eyeliner around her eyes made them look huge.

"Regina." She looked about ready to punch you. "What she did to you was evil, I know. It's not about that."

"Then what is it about?" She took an angry drag. It looked ridiculous. Sucking on the filter hard enough to scrunch her lips. You closed your eyes for a moment to not be so amused by it.

"You want revenge 'cause you were wronged. Regina, she..." You didn't want to sell her vulnerabilities to her mortal enemy, but you wanted to try and reach Janis. "She's been hurt too. It's not the same, exactly, but she's not doing this because she's rotten inside."

"You don't know shit," Janis snarled, cig nearly snapping in half in her tight grip. "You're just trying to sympathise-"

"Yes, I'm trying to sympathise with her, is that so wrong?" You interrupted her, frustrated she wasn't listening to you. Or maybe she was and just not liking what she heard. If that were the case, your words meant nothing and you were a fool for trying. Still, you kept going.

"This one time, Reg and I- I mean, Regina and I,-" You knew it was futile to hope Janis hadn't noticed your slip-up. "We were climbing the apple trees in their backyard. We had a great time, sitting up there and eating the small, sour apples, just being kids. When we got back, though, we ran into Mr George.

"Regina had on a white sundress. It was covered in grass stains and bits of tree bark. Mr George got so angry. He started yelling right in her ear, I don't even remember what he said. I was so afraid. Regina just stood there, staring at nothing. We were holding hands and she just went limp. It was as if she was used to it, like she knew exactly what to do.

"Then, he told her to get the dress to Mrs George immediately. And no dessert that day. As soon as we got away from him, I burst out crying. Poor Regina didn't know how to console me, so she just took me to her mom. She was sorting laundry in the mudroom, I think, and as soon as she saw us she just said: "Rick yelled?" Like it was so normal. Regina started crying then too."

You took a drag. "I can't stop you from seeking revenge. But I guess I'm asking you to. I'm asking the same of her. She doesn't need to take her revenge against the world, either."

Janis picked at her nailpolish. All black except for the ring finger, which was a shoddy rainbow. "If you think that sob story's gonna convince me, think again. So what, her dad yelled at her so it's okay for her to, hmm, let's go down the list, uhhh, belittle her supposed friends, degrade random passers-by, steal boyfriends like it's a hobby, breed eating disorders, and so on. Riddle me that."

"Where do you think Regina learned to treat others the way she does? Where did she learn that in order to be safe, she needed to be above everybody, that she needed to be in command at all times? Where did she learn that she needed to be mean to gain that authority? Not just mean, but vicious and cruel and fucking scathing." You raved, voice rising. "Riddle me that, Janis."

"Her daddy issues don't take away the choices she's made!"

"No, they don't, but they explain them. Doesn't intent make any difference to you?"

"You're seriously telling me she didn't intend to ruin my life when she told everybody in school that I was a lesbian?"

"I'm telling you she's a bad person, a flawed person, but redeemable. I'm not asking you to change your opinion, I'm asking you not to take this stupid revenge idea any further." You paused to take a breath. "Janis, I'm... I'm a lesbian too. She's not inherently bad."

"What?" Her voice was like a whisper.

"Yeah. I came out to her when we were, like, eleven." You'd known so early because you'd been crushing on your best friend. Wonder who that'd been. "Looking back on it now, I think she ditched me for you."

"And then she left me too, fucked me over, and moved on to her next victim." Janis looked shell-shocked. Did you really pass as straight so well? Or was her gaydar all wonky? "She- she didn't tell anybody?"

"No, I don't think so. I've never gotten any shit for it. Or, well, I have 'cuz I look pretty butch, but not like that."

Janis just looked at you, cigarette burning away. You took a pointed drag. She copied you.

"She's not homophobic. She just didn't like me." Janis said, mostly to herself it seemed. You couldn't tell what she was thinking or if this information had changed anything.

"Does that make it better or worse?"

"I don't know. It still hurts." You could understand that. "I need to talk to Damien about this."

"Don't spread any of this around." She looked at you sharply. "Obviously you're gonna tell him, I didn't mean that."

"Well. Good." She stood up and stretched her legs. "I'll think about your proposition." She said as she stumped the cig out with her boot.

You scoffed. "Bye." Proposition.

Her consideration would have to be enough for you. You stumped your own smoke as well. There was little time left to contemplate lighting a new one when yet another client came to your outdoor office. You could start charging visitors with the amount of people coming in and out of your alcove.

Regina stood above you, face still conveying not-good things, but the glassy surface of her eyes had disappeared.

"Move aside." She commanded. You shuffled off of your backpack obediently, planting your ass on the damp grass without complaint. Her pants were more expensive anyway.

"I was telling Cady she'd overstepped." You blurted before she could get a word out. "I'm sorry if it was, like, a bad move I just... I felt like I needed to say something."

"Yeah, well, that was stupid. You shouldn't have made it seem like you knew me." You winced sadly. "I don't need you to defend my honour. And you also totally ruined any leverage I had with that."

"I'm sorry." You kept your head down, looking intently at the grass.

"Hmm." She just hummed. You couldn't read her like you usually could, preoccupied with keeping yourself calm. "What are you doing for Thanksgiving?"

Confused by the sudden topic change, you looked at her. She was leaning her elbow on her knee, her temple on her fist. She had on a little smile, like she hadn't just shamed you. You should've probably been relieved. She wasn't mad. But you were still in it.

"Uh, I'm..." You shrugged, trying to regulate. "Dad isn't coming home, if that's what you're asking."

"Okay, you're coming to mine for Thanksgiving." She said so easily. "Mom will be thrilled."

"What? Thanksgiving at the Georges?"

"That sounds like a shitty TV show. Like Seinfeld."

"I'm serious, Regina." You swallowed. "Are you sure that's a good idea?"

"It'll be fine. If you act like you did the other night, everybody will be charmed." She grinned like that was an inside joke between you two. "Only my aunt and cousin, mom's side, are coming. I think you've met Riley. Aunt Josie is cool."

You were starting to feel sick. You knew her, at least thought you knew her, but her switching up how she treated you whenever she felt like it was getting tiring. What did she want from you? How were you supposed to act? Could you even ask without her getting mad or you embarrassing yourself?

You had conviction in that you liked her, wanted to protect her, and would be on her side, but was that enough? Did you have enough strength to sustain the rollercoaster that was Regina George? It felt as if there was no other option than to keep riding. You couldn't exactly jump off unless you were prepared for certain death.

"I've met Riley." Your tone must've been telling of how drained you were feeling. Regina tilted her head at you.

"Are you okay?"

"Yeah, yeah, just tired." You didn't want to be around people for the rest of the day. You wished you could just go home, nap, and have Regina there. Your Reggie, a little bitchy but funny, the side of her she only seemed to show when you were in private.

"You could go home." Her suggestion was tempting.

"No, dad's gonna yell at me again if I skip any more classes." He'd already called you earlier that month. It hadn't been pleasant, to put it nicely. Fifteen minutes of him berating you over the phone felt like a split second compared to the hour-long rants he'd go on when he was home. So, it could've been worse.

"I'll come over to yours later." She stated rather than asked. Obviously, you had to say yes, however reluctantly. "We could go shopping, too."

"You'd take me shopping?" Now that was new. You couldn't help but be a little pleased by that.

"Grocery shopping."

Oh.

"Mom says it's best to get some of the ingredients for Thanksgiving early." Regina recounted, crossing her arms and leaning against the metal backing. Your backpack had her elevated so she was a little above you. A change in pace.

Even her lower chin looked good. Damn.

"This early, though?"

"You know her. She's neurotic."

"Maybe a little bit."

"So, you'll come?" Resigned, you nodded. "I'll come to yours and we'll go."

"Why aren't we taking your car?"

"It's too recognisable. Duh." Yeah. Of course. How could you forget? "We're going pretty late, too. Less foot traffic."

You hummed. It wasn't as if you could change society. Even if things were different with Regina, you still couldn't be seen getting too cosy with her. You could like her from a distance and that was that. You could be a good friend and that should've been plenty. Really, above anything, you wanted her to be happy. With or without you.

That thought grated on you. You didn't want to lose her. You weren't sure if your choices made it so that you already had.

Why did everything have to be so hard?

Notes: This was originally supposed to be the climax chapter, but it seems we're still climbing. Next chapter then! Look forward to it :)

Taglist: @autorasexy, @wedfan2, @unadulterated-moron, @modernsapphicism, @9unknown0, @sage-rose2000, @massive-honkas, @nattys-swiftie, @likefirenrain, @luz-enjoyer, @dandelions4us, @natashamaximoff-69, @alexkolax, @jareaul0ver, @here4theqts, @charleeeesworld, @natsbiggestfan1, @brocoliisscared, @yellowwallflowers, @scarlettbitchx

(if you want to be added to the taglist, comment that on this post :))

[notakoala]

IMAGINE SHOUTO TODOROKI BEING INJURED AND HIS LOVER THOUGHT THEY LOST HIM!!!

"Shouto?" Almost a cry came from your voice as you lifted large parts of concrete off the demolished grounds. Blood and sweat staining your clothes as well as debris and dust from the collapsed building.

The areas surrounded was rubble. Destroyed. The building collapsed after one of the villains in the area used a earth shaking quirk in the vicinity of 100 metres. Catastrophic, the evacuation protocol didn't even take place. And the villian was nowhere to be found.

You knew he bad to be nearby somewhere, he was right next to you before this whole shitshow happened. It was difficult to remember, it must have been at least 2 hours before you woke up underneath a large slab of cement. Was your ankle sprained? Yes. Your arm? Broken. But surprisingly you weren't dead, you weren't able to say for some other people.

The rescue team already found 8 dead people, all civilians, all innocent. A man who spotted the rubble moving above you quickly called over three more people, the all lifted you up and identifying you immediately. Ushering to get you medical attention, however your stubbornness leads you to wandering helplessly through the demolished buildings. A sad attempt of finding your husband of 2 years, boyfriend of 7 years.

Your voice was cracked and hoarse, holding your arm in pain and trying to find him. You just want him. Nothing else matters right now. "Shouto!" Cracked screams come from you as you slip and knock your arm on some old pipes in a column.

"Shouto!" Another pained yell came from your weakened state, sure. You've fought in situations like this, but the adrenaline of the fight was gone. Maybe it was more or less shock at the time.

Falling to your knees, weak and still probably concussed. You stand back up shakily, limping through the destroyed area, spotting soke blood stains on the dust covered concrete.

Your eyes widen as you get closer, running as best as you could before falling beside him. "Shouto!" A guttural cry came from deep inside of your throat, trying to throw the large slab off his blood soaked body.

His bicoloured hair was stained with a film of dust and blood, specks of cement on his face. Using one arm you manage to push the slab off him in three minutes before cupping his face with your non injured arm and begging him, begging him to stay. Screaming for someone to help you, help him.

"Please Shou... Don't fucking leave me!"

You scream at him, propping his head on your chest, your hero costume had been ripped and damaged. Holding his body with one arm as you weakly cried against his forehead.

"Shouto!" You scream at him against, only feeling his cold skin against your warm skin, a film of dust covering his beaten state, Blood over his face and cuts on him.

Sobbing and shaking him, some rescue team members were running towards the two of you, hearing your cry they stopped feet away from you. Watching as you were clearly unconsolable about the loss of him.

A slight movement came from him that you didn't feel, his arm twitching and his eyes opening to see your closed and tear stained one's watching you mourn and cursing at him, begging him to not go.

The rescue team took notice of the fact he wasn't dead and tried to move you so they could assess him but you pushed them away, not knowing they were trying to help before a weak and shaky hand also cups your face.

"I'm okay... Let them..." His voice was weak and quiet, this was something you never usually see. The fact he hides his weakened state with many other people.

More tears streamed down your cheeks as you embraced him and kissed his face. Not caring about the sweat and muck on his cheek, he was alive.

[roosterforme]

A Love You Don't Find Everyday Part 19 | Rooster x Reader

Summary: Your wedding week is here, and you decide to give Bradley another one of his gifts early. In return, he fulfills a fantasy for you. When you host your parents and all of those closest to you for Thanksgiving dinner, it really sets in for Bradley that this is what the rest of his life is going to be like.

Warnings: Smut, angst, fluff, and swearing

Length: 4400 words

Pairing: Bradley "Rooster" Bradshaw x Female Reader

Check out my masterlist for more!

When Maverick cornered him at the end of the day on Monday, Bradley eyed him warily. "Don't tell me you're bringing me more papers."

Maverick shook his head and laughed. "No. Not papers. But I need everyone to complete their flight evaluation paperwork during the first week of December."

Bradley's eyes went wide. He would be in Hawaii with you. Without completed paperwork, he could end up being grounded. "Shit. Can you push it later into the month for me?"

"No. But I set you up in one of the classrooms now to take care of it."

Bradley groaned. He promised you that he would be home to help you finalize everything on the wedding checklist tonight, but this issue could literally prevent him from getting a paycheck later.

"Fuck. Okay, fine," Bradley told Mav. "Thanks for making sure I got it done in time." Bradley texted you a quick explanation while he strolled to Classroom 1 so he could get started, because this would take him about two hours. 

Baby Girl Bradshaw: Take your time, Roo. But let me know before you head home, okay? I might need you to stop at the store.

At least you weren't upset. You probably didn't really need his help with the checklist, but he wanted to be there with you anyway. 

He settled in and got to work, needing to log into various sites on his phone to pull up his credentials for verification. After two hours, he was finally done, but his phone battery was almost dead. 

He sent you a quick text saying he was leaving shortly to find out what you needed from the store, and you wrote back immediately.

Baby Girl Bradshaw: Remember where we first met? Meet me there.

Bradley would remember until his dying day that he first set eyes on you last year on August 14th just before 9 o'clock in the morning. In Classroom 8. That was where you first spoke to each other. That was where he got to hear you lecturing them on software protocols. That was where he started to fall for you. 

He was immediately rushing out of Classroom 1 and heading down the long corridor. The building was mostly deserted now that it was after dinnertime, and most of the lights had been dimmed. But when he pushed the last door open, you were perched on the edge of the desk, and Bradley could still perfectly picture how you'd looked up at the podium in your khaki uniform last summer. 

But right now, you were wearing the red dress that you wore on your first date, when he had taken you to the hot sauce restaurant and silent disco in Del Mar. You had on matching red lipstick, and you had selected red polish when you got your nails done the other day.

Bradley was frozen in the doorway, looking at you as you smiled at him. "Close the door and take a seat, Lieutenant Commander Bradshaw," you instructed with a grin. 

He closed the door and headed for the seat in the first row, right in front of you. "I thought you were at home, Sweetheart."

"I was," you informed him, sliding off the desk and taking the three steps until you were in Bradley's lap. "Then I thought I would come back to base and give you one of your remaining wedding gifts here." You kissed him softly, your lips barely brushing his. He let one hand come up to the back of your neck to get a deeper kiss, not caring about getting your lipstick on his mouth. 

"What's my wedding gift?" he asked before dipping his lips down to your neck. "Getting to look at you in the dress you wore on our first date?"

You laughed at that and started to slide out of his grasp. Bradley tried to keep you on his lap, but you managed to slide down so you were kneeling on the floor between his legs with your hands resting on his khaki covered thighs. He was sure his eyes were bugging out.

"No. I'd let you look at me in this dress anytime, Roo. When I asked some of the guys what they would most like to get as a wedding gift from their soon to be wife, they seemed to universally agree that a blowjob was the way to go."

He briefly tipped his head back and groaned at the ceiling when your hands started to slide up his uniform pants. When you popped open his button and eased the zipper down, Bradley kept his eyes on yours. His hard dick sprang free when you pulled his pants and underwear down a little bit, and you squealed in delight. A small part of Bradley really loved that the guys all knew you were going to suck his dick for him, that you did it all the time.

"You want it sloppy, Roo?" you asked sweetly, licking your bright red lips. 

"God, yes," he groaned, his eyes drifting closed as you wrapped your small hand around him and grazed his tip with your lips. "Please."

You just moaned in response, and now Bradley was wishing he'd taken a second to lock the door. "Anyone could walk in, Sweetheart," he told you, stroking your perfect cheek with his thumb while you kissed along his length. 

"I know," you told him before swirling your tongue around his head and making him groan. "That's why I wanted to do it here."

You were filthy in the best way, and you were going to be his wife. "Everything you do turns me on. You know that? Everything."

You smiled up at him like he was single handedly responsible for all of the happiness in this world, and then you took the tip of his cock between your perfect, red lips.

Every inch of him was treated the the feel of your lips and your tongue as you sucked on him and took him deep. Bradley watched you take him until you were gagging, squeezing him with your throat until your eyes started to water. 

"Fuck, Baby Girl," he growled, eyeing the red lipstick smears along the base of his cock as you pulled him out of your mouth. He watched you open your mouth wide and run his tip along your lips before letting him rest on your velvety tongue. "You're perfect," he praised, running his fingers along your neck. You licked and sucked just the tip of him while you played with his balls. He could already feel the pressure building, and he knew what you were capable of. 

"You like that, Daddy?" you asked softly, stroking your fingers along his balls and nuzzling him with your face.

"You fucking know I do." And then his head tipped back again as you took his length deep again, and he felt the sensation through his entire body. You were sucking on him so well, as he palmed the back of your head, encouraging you to keep him in your heavenly mouth. 

Bradley watched your half lidded eyes drift closed briefly as you gagged on him. And then you were sucking along his length before taking him deep again. Every time he bottomed out, he could feel the pressure of his orgasm building. You bobbed on his cock, humming and gasping as you picked up speed, and Bradley watched your saliva drip onto his khaki pants. 

When you pulled him out with a loud pop, he growled your name, and your wide eyes met his. Then Bradley watched you lick along his balls and suck on him there while stroking his cock with your hands. 

"Baby Girl," he groaned. You had lipstick smeared on your face, and Bradley had never seen anything prettier than you cradling his balls and sucking on his dick. 

The wet sounds as you hollowed your cheeks and bobbed faster on his length had him thrusting into you. You moaned, eyes wide as he hit the back of your throat. You popped him out again, strands of saliva falling from those red lips as you took a deep breath before taking him to the hilt again.

Bradley swiped away the tears from your cheeks before digging his fingers into your scalp a little rough. "I'm close, Sweetheart," he murmured, teeth gritted in pleasure. 

You just grinned around his cock and hollowed your cheeks, sucking on him until he was moaning way too loud. His balls were tense, ready to spill into your mouth, and then you pulled him out one last time. Bradley watched his cum paint your lips and tongue as you gasped and squeaked in delight. You swallowed him down in gulps, and his cum ran down your chin, mixing with your saliva. Your eyes were needy as you delicately licked and sucked every drop as it beaded out of him until Bradley watched you just kissing along his sensitive tip again.

"I love you," he promised, swiping his fingers through his cum on your chin and feeding it to you. As you licked his fingers clean, Bradley caught his breath. The front of his uniform pants was adorned with cum, saliva, and red lipstick smudges. It was almost enough to make him hard again. 

After you tucked him back into his boxer briefs, you climbed back onto his lap. Bradley kissed you and licked your lips clean. "Mmm," you moaned. "Let's go home so I can feed you dinner." 

"Do you still need me to stop at the store?" he asked as you pulled him to his feet and zipped his pants. 

"No, I took care of it. Just wanted to get ice cream to go with the chocolate chip cookies I made."

Bradley laced his fingers through yours and kissed your ring. "For ice cream sandwiches? Are you purposely reminding me of all the things you did when we were dating that made me crazy for you?"

"Maybe," you said with a smirk.

-------------------------

"We're gonna be late," Bradley called for the third time. You just rolled your eyes in the bathroom mirror. 

"Their flight doesn't even land for two more hours."

Then he appeared in the bathroom doorway with Tramp in his arms. "If you want to have time to go to the Hard Deck for a beer first, we need to leave. You look beautiful. You look perfect. Let's go."

You capped your mascara. "Fine." You had been subtly trying to make sure nobody was making plans for Friday afternoon without actually giving away any wedding information. You were getting really antsy that one of them wouldn't be there, so giving them one final reminder today would be a good idea. "I can't believe tomorrow is Thanksgiving. And then our wedding. Are we out of our minds? Planning it the way we did?"

"Nah," Bradley replied with a crooked grin. "The only thing that's bothering me is that I know for a fact that the caterers won't make the Marry Me Rooster as good as you do."

You started laughing as you grabbed a denim jacket to wear over your dress and followed him out to the driveway. "Well if that's your biggest concern, then I'm sure Friday will be a lovely day for you."

Bradley opened the passenger door of the Bronco and buckled you in. "It's going to be the best day of my life," he promised with a kiss.

When you got to the Hard Deck, you could tell you were annoying all of the aviators at this point. And when you mentioned one more time that you were hoping everyone could make it 'to hang out on Friday', they all groaned.

"Angel, yes. For the millionth time, we will be there," Jake drawled as he took a shot at the pool table. You examined his forehead where he had a scar from his deployment. He must have had the stitches removed today. 

"I'm not even talking to you. I don't trust you anymore after how much you let me drink at the club."

"Here," Bradley mumbled, nudging a beer into your hand when he returned from the bar. He kissed your cheek before taking the pool cue Phoenix held out for him. You heard him double and triple checking with her that she was going to stick to the plans for Friday. You didn't even want to think about how shitty Bradley would feel if his best friend wasn't at his wedding. 

"Hey, Jake?" you asked quietly.

"Angel?"

"Can I borrow your keychain? The one with the Super Hornet?"

He dug his keys out of his pocket and unclipped the beat up metal keychain that you always thought was so cool. "You thinking about getting one for Rooster?"

"Yeah," you lied smoothly. "I'm going to look for one online. I'll give it back in a few days."

You sat quietly with Bob and talked about plans for Christmas while Bradley played pool. He kept stealing little glances in your direction, and it made you smile every time. And then he started grinning, too. Then it struck you; this would be your very last time hanging out at the Hard Deck before you were married. 

So much had happened here. You remembered which stool you were sitting on when Bradley initiated that first, flirtatious conversation with you by knocking your beer all over your lap. And you kept a little mental catalog of all the songs he had ever played for you on that old, out of tune piano. 

"I love you," he whispered against your lips while he waited for Phoenix to take her turn. 

You grabbed him by the front of his shirt and pulled him close. "Next time we hang out at the Hard Deck with everyone, we will be married."

He rested his forehead to yours and smiled against your lips. "Less than two days," he whispered, running his hands along your hips and waist. "Then I'm yours, for real. Like actually a family."

You glanced at everyone playing pool and Bob eating his peanuts. "We have a huge family, Roo."

"You're right," he said with a chuckle, kissing your nose.

Then you licked his bottom lip gently, and Bradley's demeanor immediately changed. You felt his hands tighten on your waist, drawing you closer to his warm body as he hummed. When his hands found their way to your lower back you nibbled on his lip before licking him again. 

"Sweetheart." His voice had a tone of warning behind it, and you'd be lying if you said it didn't go right to your core. 

"Yes, Daddy?" you replied, not even trying to be quiet. The fabric of your dress was bunched up in his hands, and his brown eyes dipped down to look at your lips. 

"If you want Daddy, just say the words."

You licked your lips and said, "I want my Daddy."

Bradley took your half empty bottle of beer and set it down along with his empty one. With one hand pressed firmly to your lower back, he ushered you past the pool table. "Gotta get to the airport. See some of you tomorrow and all of you on Friday!" he called out, not even giving you a chance to say anything at all. 

You turned to look at him over your shoulder. "Where are we going?"

"The Bronco." His voice was commanding. He was in Daddy mode now, but you loved to give him an attitude. 

"No. Meet me in the sand. In our spot." You wove through the crowd ahead of him and out into the cool night air. There were some people out on the deck, talking and smoking, but you breezed right past them and ran down the side steps and into the darkness. 

A moment later, Bradley's heavy footfalls could be heard on the steps as well, and then he found you in the dim light filtering down from the deck, your back pressed to the wooden pillar. 

"Hi, Daddy," you whispered, and he reached right for the hem of your dress, pulling it up and yanking your underwear lower until the lace slipped down your legs and onto the tops of your boat shoes. 

"Hi, Baby Girl." His words were soft and raspy as his fingertips teased along your wet slit. 

"This is our spot." Your head tipped back against the pillar as he dipped his middle finger inside you. "But you've never fucked me here before." The voices and laughter above you on the deck had you more turned on than you'd like to admit. 

"I'm about to change that," he promised. "I'll fill you up all the way. Put a baby in you."

You groaned as he withdrew his finger and spun you around so you were facing the deck post, palms planted against it. You had a visceral reaction to the sound of him unzipping his jeans, and you were instantly panting and pushing your butt back toward him. 

"You're so fucking needy, Baby Girl. I love it." And then his big hands were up your dress, teasing along your ass before he guided himself inside you with a hiss. 

"Bradley!" 

"Quiet," he commanded, pumping into you. "I know you like this. Being out in the open. Listening to people up on the deck."

The noise that escaped you was something filthy that lived in the back of your throat. But he was driving you wild, because he was right. You loved that someone could look over the side of the deck and see Bradley fucking you. The idea that someone could hear your little whines or Bradley's grunts and come to investigate made your pussy wetter. 

"That's what Daddys do, Baby Girl," his voice was low and next to your ear. "They give you exactly what you want, fuck you in public when you need it. As long as you're so sweet to Daddy the rest of the time."

"Oh my god," you groaned. Bradley's words, and the feel of his fingers on your clit, and the slapping of his thighs against yours... it was all too much. "I'm so close," you whimpered. 

"I'll get you there, and then I'll take my share, too," he promised, and almost instantly you felt yourself clenching his cock with your pussy from the release of pleasure he caused with his fingers. You bucked your hips back against him, riding out your orgasm. 

And then, just like he promised, he took you by both hips, his fingers digging into you, and absolutely railed you. All you could do was grip the wooden post and hang on as he rocked into you, letting you feel every inch of him in your overstimulated pussy. 

You were whimpering as he growled your name, filling you up with cum. You could already feel the mess leaking out of you as he pushed your hair away from your neck and pressed his lips there. "I love you, Roo," you whispered, and he gently pulled you away from the deck post. 

He whispered in your ear how much he loved you and wanted to marry you while he eased himself out of your pussy, and you could feel the wetness on your legs. 

"Shit," he mumbled as he zipped up his pants. "We need to get to the airport to get your parents."

You giggled. "I'm a mess now, Roo."

"Yeah," he agreed, taking you by the hand. "And that's your fault. You always pull this Daddy stunt right before we have to go pick your parents up from the airport." He sounded firm, but when he led you into the lit up parking lot, you could see the satisfied smirk on his face.

-----------------------

Bradley and you had dropped your parents off at their expensive hotel last night, and he didn't regret a single penny he was spending. It had afforded him the ability to take a very leisurely bath with you, during which you and he sipped some beers and talked about the wedding. 

Then on Thanksgiving morning, you and he were up early, drinking coffee and starting to get the kitchen organized for dinner preparations. The parade was playing on the TV, and Bradley occasionally wandered away to play along to a song on the piano. 

But the best part was, you and he were in your underwear the whole time. And you agreed to take a break and ride his dick on one of the dining room chairs after he helped you peel potatoes. He was seriously hoping one of these times it did the trick, because he couldn't wait until you were pregnant. 

"Mm," you hummed, kissing his lips and running your fingers through his hair. "You need to go pick them up at the hotel, and I need to take another shower. I don't think I have gone more than six hours without your cum dripping out of me since I told you I stopped using birth control."

Bradley groaned and helped you stand up. "I told you I was gonna keep you full, Baby Girl. Just wait until we're on our honeymoon."

"Oh, I have plans for you, Roo," you told him over your shoulder as you strolled naked toward the bathroom. He watched you spread the mess on your thighs with each step you took, but when he tried to follow you, he was met with your palm on his chest. "Go pick them up so my mom and I can make dinner," you said with a laugh before you disappeared into the bathroom and closed the door. 

So he got dressed and went to the hotel to pick up your mom and dad. He took the scenic drive on the way back, letting them get a good look at the ocean and all the beach trails. It was a perfectly clear, sunny day, and Bradley hoped tomorrow would be just as good. 

"How many are coming for dinner tonight?" your mom wondered out loud, already worried about the amount of food as Bradley pulled into the driveway. 

"Should be eleven of us," Bradley replied before jumping out to open both passenger side doors for your parents. "It'll be okay. Your daughter is a kitchen wizard. She's got it all under control."

"Hi!" you called out when he led them inside. "Mom, I need help with this stuffing!" 

And after that, Bradley was relegated to the couch with your dad to watch football and drink beer. The Baltimore Ravens were playing, and your dad was invested. And soon Payback arrived with some bottles of wine. And after that Coyote was there along with Jake. Pretty soon, Bradley was smashed into a spot on the couch between Nat and your dad, and everyone was talking and laughing at the same time. 

Jake made his way into the kitchen with the offer to be the official taste tester. Mav, Penny and Amelia arrived with four different kinds of pies. The house was full and noisy, and Bradley knew it was all because of you. The only reason he was here and healthy and happy was because you loved him. You were the main reason he did anything now. 

Bradley found you in the kitchen, laughing at Jake when he burned his tongue on some macaroni and cheese. As soon as Bradley smiled at you, there you were, in his arms. He just held you and rested his chin on your head. 

Your mom turned away from the gravy she was making to look at you in his arms. "Please tell me you've decided on a wedding date."

Bradley opened his mouth to try to distract your mom, but you were already saying, "I think we should have a lot more information by tomorrow, mom. Can you help me set the table, Roo?"

"Sure, Sweetheart," he replied, reaching to gather plates and glasses for you. 

You squealed at him as he followed you around the table, setting down plate after plate. "I don't think any of them know about tomorrow," you whispered with wide eyes.

"Just Mav. Just what we wanted."

"It's perfect! Seriously, Bradley. It's going to be so perfect!"

Then you were in his arms again, and Bradley's tongue was in your mouth. He was about to suggest a detour to the laundry room when your mom walked in, and Bradley tried to back away from you as he blushed. 

But your mom was just laughing. "Maybe you two should just get married tomorrow. I'm surprised I don't have a grandchild already."

"Mom," you groaned, stepping out of Bradley's arms and finishing setting the table. 

"What? With how beautiful you are and how handsome he is, I'll have the most adorable grandkids!"

Bradley just blushed more and mumbled, "I'm trying," before heading back to the living room. 

But pretty soon dinner was ready, and you had everyone sitting at the table which was filled with food that you and your mom had made with minimal help from Jake. Bradley brought in your bottle of hot sauce, just knowing you'd probably want to dump it all over your turkey. The way your eyes lit up when he remembered to do silly little things like that, made him even more excited for tomorrow. 

It was a tight fight for eleven people, and Bradley was sitting in a folding chair at the head of the table next to you. But it was actually kind of perfect. So he stood up for a beat to simply say, "We're both so happy to have all of you here. I hated holidays for a really long time, but now I like them again. So thank you."

Nat raised her wine glass and said, "To family." Everyone else raised a drink as well, and Bradley watched as your parents shared a kiss. He eased himself back into his chair and sipped his wine before setting the glass down. He reached for your hand and laced his fingers gently with yours. 

"Thank you," he whispered, and your eyes met his, a puzzled look on your face. 

"For what?"

He shrugged, searching for the right words as tears pricked behind his eyes. "Everything. You've made everything better."

-------------------------

WEDDING CHAPTER IS NEXT! I want to thank all of you so much, especially everyone who has been reading along with Roo and Baby Girl for a long time now. I have so much fun creating this little world that they live it, and you all make it even better! They have come so far together!

PART 20

@mak-32

@hotch-meeeeeuppppp

@swthxrry

@chassy21

@yaboid19

@solacestyles

@avoirlecoupdefoudre

@daisyhollyxox

@callsigndiamond

@harper1666

@throwinsauce

@beebslebobs

@awesomebooklover17

@wintercap89

@whosyourgnomie4

@rosesinmars

@blog-name6996

@bcon24

@wishfulwithwine

@backinwonderl4nd

@monte-carlando

@tetragonia

@gingerbreadandpaper

@emptyloverofmine

@apparently-sunshine

@chaoticassidy

@missmirandafe

@topgunbb

@changlingkhat

@sugarcoated-lame

@callsign-jupiter

@avada-kedavra-bitch-187

@katiebby04

@marantha

@averyhotchner

@abaker74

@andycanbeemotional

@heli991113

@k-k0129

@noz4a2

@tallyovie

@shanimallina87

@starlightstories

@teddyluvs2sing

@little-wiseone

@ccbb2222

@lilyevanswhore

@o-the-o-grim-o-reaper-o

@hecate-steps-on-me

@xoxabs88xox

[kosije]

fratboy!gojo official chapter 1.5 ;) rewritten to hell and back!!!

cw: fem! afab reader, cheating boyfriend, mini panic attack, sub reader, unprotected sex, gojo aint shit, reader is has low self esteem

"C'mon babe, just give me one more chance. I love you. She was just a mistake!"

"You slept with her 8 times."

"I'm sorry. Who's talking to you?"

You don't know what to do. You have half of a mind to ask him 'why' before you feel Max’s arms around you.

“You have some fucking nerve even showing your face to her. go slip into some other bitch, loser.”

“How about you let her speak for herself, huh? This doesn’t involve you.”

“Andrew I,” It’s pathetic the way you’re shaking, but when you lift from your friend's arms and see the reassuring nod she gives you, your heartbeat slows. “I just- I won't take you back. Please, just go.” you’re shaking like a leaf in the wind and you almost wince when you see his mouth open again. But he doesn’t speak. For a second you think you see a flash of remorse, but then anger is so hot on his face you don't even recognize him.

“Whatever, not even worth the trouble.” and then he’s just stalking off.

You should feel relieved, happy even. But you don't. in fact, ou feel you’re gonna throw up at any moment. Your arm is wrapped around your chest as you try to ground yourself.

Concrete. breathe in. grass. Breathe out.

There's concrete, grass, and people. Breathe in.

There's concrete, grass, people, and trees. Breathe out.

“-Hey! Did you hear me?”

Vision clearing, you blink up at the voice. You almost forgot Max was here. Her hazel eyes are full of worry, and you think for a second that you’ve died and are being held by an angel.

 Her wine-red hair is in pretty beach waves and her tan skin glows under the fall sun. When your eyes focus on her glossed lips, you realize again that she’s talking.

“Huh? 'm sorry, what was that?”

she’s stroking your hair out of your face with a pout. 

“Nena, you look so drained already. 'Was just saying that I can miss this one lecture and we can go home, just for today.”

you appreciate the concern, so much so you hug deeper into the crook of her neck.

“'m okay. Plus, we are already here.”

You can feel her sigh into the crown of your head. “Alright, but if you ever want to leave-”

“I know.” You still have a sickly feeling in your gut, but her embrace makes the weight lighter. “I’ll tell you, promise.”

“Ok, Nena. Let’s go.”

...

you should’ve gone home.

Actually, that’s a lie. If you did you would miss the lecture on what you need to focus on for your next midterm. But as you gaze at the familiar blue in front of your eyes, you think about how if you were maybe a second faster to leave you wouldn’t be frozen like how you are now. You’re sweating out your cardigan for sure.

“Remember me?"

He knows the answer to that question.

...

"Your uber is almost here! Make sure you call me once you get there, and text me quarterly!"

"I will, don't worry!" you know why she's so nervous to let you go to a party alone and as much as you would prefer her there with you, she has to study. You've spent the past 3 weeks crying, eating, and crying some more. Getting cheated on is horrible. But getting cheated on by your high school sweetheart, who you've been with for 3 years, with his friend's sister? It's all you've been thinking about despite all of yo ur efforts to make it stop. Today is about you. Today has to be about you, because you’re losing yourself. You're gonna go to this party, let loose, have fun, and forget about him. Even if you have your qualms about going to parties alone. 

You pull out your shortest dress, wear your hair how you like, and put on your favorite perfume. When Max sees you, she smiles.

"What a bad girl!"

"Yeah?"

"Yeah!"

It's enough of a reassurance that you smile and turn to look for shoes to wear. You're just about to pull out heels when she stops you.

"Short platforms, Hermana. You'll get sores on your feet with anything higher."

you let her pull down heels for you and, with one last tight hug, she goes over everything in your purse.

"Phone?"

"Yup."

"Portable charger?"

"Yup."

"Cash?"

"Always."

"Pepper spray?"

"mhm."

"Keys." instead of speaking, you curl your finger around the jump ring and twirl them around your fingers.

"Okay. okay, yeah, you're set," she says, mostly to herself.

"Max?"

"Yeah?"

"I'm nervous." 

"Don't be," she hums, smoothing your hair and then the neckline of your dress. "You‘ll knock ‘em dead. Just be safe."

"Thank you, I dunno what I'd do without you," you coo, kissing her cheek.

"I know! Have fun!"

...

The party sucks. Not because of food, music, or drinks. Not because of the conversation you’ve been making with familiar faces, or the occasional eyes that fall from your eyes to your chest and legs, and shy question of if you’re open to a date after ‘what happened with that guy.’” And then you’re reminded why you came here before saying “you’re not interested in anything serious at the moment.” Then as you’re on your way to the bathroom, you see him. And when you see him, you see her. And suddenly the fruity drinks turned to shots, and slight swaying turned into tipsy grinding, and then you’re dragging somebody to the couch in tears.

"That piece of shit had the nerve to show his face around here after what he did! I never deserved that! I was there for him it his lowest, then that- that son of a bitch threw it all in my face!"

"Aww baby, what a dick."

"And- and he even," you're sniffling when a hand cups your cheek, wiping away stray tears as you talk the exact thing you were supposed to forget about. "He even gave her the sweater I bought for him! It has our initials on it, not theirs!"

"that's horrible!" it comes out in a gasp, and suddenly you're being pulled against someone's chest. You forget how you got here, nor do you know who’s crystal blue eyes you're looking into, but they sure are pretty. You're just about rolling off his chest to fill your cup again before he reaches into his jean pocket and dangles something in your face.

"Do ya smoke, sweetheart?" he says with a wicked smile and you just nod. Part of you recognizes the man in front of you, so you rationalize that as a good enough excuse. You've seen his white hair somewhere; you just can't place your finger on it.

You don't dwell on it much longer when you see his pink tongue peek from his lips and lick the backwood shut. It's not inherently dirty, but it is enough to make your thighs clench. His hand disappears back into his pocket as he fishes out a lighter, and you're so enamored that your hands find his chest and you gasp. He's ripped. But all he does is smile, take a long drag from his blunt, and then your senses are clouded with smoke.

"Hey!" you're telling him off, but when the smoke clears, he's smirking. You swat his chest in response, but then you're only reminded of how firm he feels under his white tee. And now he’s poking at your sides.

"What's wrong?"

"Quit it!"

"Quit what?" His fingers only speed up, and you're pouting at him to hold back the laugh threatening to escape from you. Heat blooms everywhere he touches, and he keeps it up until your hands trap around his wrist. Seeming bored, he sets his hand on your thigh and brings the blunt to your lips. The next immeasurable amount of minutes is spent rotating it without a word, and the more you smoke, the lighter you feel, and the more your thighs seem to rub together. The heat pooling between your legs only gets worse when his hand squeezes your thigh, and the whine you let out is hard to decider if it was in your head or not.

"Are you apart of this?"

He hums a question, but when you gesture to the surrounding party, he 'ahs' in understanding.

"You don't know? I'm a part of this fraternity."

"I don't even know your name."

Now he genuinely looks surprised, "It's Satoru."

Satoru...? The name sends a pang of recognition through your head, but you can't place it completely. No doubt that he's popular, though. When you tell him your name, he grins.

"That's a pretty name, sweetheart. Fits a pretty girl like you."

And despite your better judgment, you bask in the compliment. The heat between your thighs has turned into slick and there’s no doubt that this party is proving to be beneficial.

“So, you're a jock?" you try to ask it in a steady voice, but with how hazy you're feeling from the weed you doubt it comes out stable.

"Something like that." he laughs, but it's all too vague.

"Is that why you joined?" he takes another long drag and passes the blunt to you, this time blowing the smoke out of your face.

"I joined for a friend," and when that answer doesn't please you, he goes on. "I have a friend, I'm really close to him so I joined the same fraternity as him when he asked. I don't mind it, being in a fraternity has its props, i.e; this party."

His voice is so nice. "You seem like the party type."

He just shrugs and puts the blunt out on a random coaster. "I just like fun, sweetheart. Plus, the desserts are always the best part."

That catches your attention. "Right!" you gush, practically jumping up. You think you hear him groan, but you are faded.

"I never would've thought a frat party would carry the best desserts I've ever had.

"Glad you like it. Especially since I put the word in for it."

"Shut up!"

"I'm serious!”

you open your mouth to speak, but something buzzes in the purse next to you and you suddenly remember you haven't texted Max in almost an hour.

"Hey girl u good?"

"???"

"If you're dead I'll kill u,"

"Imsosorryimokaydontworry! 1,"

"K stay safe"

"Did you hear me?"

You snap your head up and see eyes that were icy blue, now a clouded cerulean. "What?"

"I said, it's getting crowded. Do you wanna go upstairs?"

You look around. It looks about the same to you. When you look back at him and his pretty face, you can't find it in you to say no, so you just nod and slide off his lap. Standing up, you get a bit dizzy off your high and grip Satoru's hand to keep from falling flat on your face. And that’s when you realize he's much, much taller than you.

He doesn't seem to mind how tightly you’re holding onto him, even smiling down at you before leading you somewhere up a flight of stairs. Your heart feels like it may beat out of your chest when he pushes past a door that you can just tell isn't his. The room is small, just a bed, closet, and dresser, and none of the trophies on it have his name on them.

“You know, your ex is an idiot.”

You can feel his hands run over your arms when he says it and you’re sighing into him, with your head falling weakly over his shoulder. You know what he wants, and you can't bring yourself to push off him when you feel how his breath fans over your ear and his rock-hard erection brushes against your back.

“You want me to show you better? Give you what you deserve?”

all you do is whine and then he’s kissing down your shoulders and sliding the straps of your dress off.

“Give me an answer, baby. Let me hear you say it.”

And you do. In a breathy gasp, you ask, “Please,” and feel him smile into the crook of your neck before pulling back. You know what he wants, and you can’t bring yourself to push his off, because you want it too.

“Then how about you show me just how pretty you are under that dress, hmm?”

And again, as if on a spell, you do. In slow and shaky hands, you remove your dress, mentally cursing yourself for not choosing a cuter set to have worn under. You sit on the bed to take off your shoes. Your heart doubles when you look up at him through heavy eyes from where you sit to see him mirroring your expression. 

“Knew you’d be so pretty. You’re a real sight, sweetheart,” he groans, rolling his palm over his erection with a shiver.

You’re dripping from the praise. Blame it on your destroyed self-esteem, but you haven’t felt this desire in a while. You want to shy away from it, but his fingers run down your clothed slit and you lose yourself. He doesn’t waste time once he feels how wet you are already, just huffs out a laugh and peels your underwear and bra from your sweaty body and groans. 

Your eyes are glued to the way he strips his shirt off, showing his defined stature, but when he kicks off his pants, your mouth practically waters at the sight of his cock on full display. He's much bigger than your ex.

“I’ll fuck him out of your head, baby. Don’t bother thinkin’ about anything but my dick.”

…

You couldn’t think of anything else if you tried. He’s bullied himself so deep inside you, you can barely cover your cries with your palm. Satoru rams into you with so much fervor that the bed is squeaking. And when he hits the spot that has you seeing stars, all you can get out is ‘Thank you,’ repeatedly, gripping onto anything you can for a sense of stability.

One hand closes around your throat while the other draws circles on your clit and tears stream down your face as your back arches into him in the bliss of your orgasm washing over you.

“Fuck- so pretty like that. Tell me who fucks you this good. Who makes your pretty pussy cum the hardest?"

"You do! Jus' you Satoru!" that seems to do it, because his bottom lip is sucked between his teeth and his hips are stuttering.

‘m close- fuck tell me where you want it. Want me to come over those pretty tits, babe? Or maybe all over that face, hmm?” on a whim, your thighs close around him.

“Inside. I want you inside. 'm- ahh- ahn the pill, promise,”

And he doesn’t even get another thrust in before you feel him fill you up in airy groans. He rides out his orgasm inside you in frenzied thrust, so when he pulls out you both shudder at the loss of contact. He gathers your clothes up and helps you shimmy back into them, not bothering to hide how pleased he is when you pull your underwear up, trapping the seed that’s dripped out of you. You watch him dress while you run your hand through his hair, laying down the tufts that have fluffed up. You look up at him, to see him already looking at you. And this time it’s not at your lips or tits, but you, and you feel so embarrassed you back away.

buzz!

A chill runs down your spine at the ringing “Oh shit!”

“what’s wrong?”

“M-my roommate!” You say, hands frantically rummaging through the sheets before hearing your bag drop into the floor and pulling your phone out. “Shit! I should’ve been there 30 minutes ago!”

“Hey, it’s alright. I can take you home.”

“No, no, it’s okay, I’ll just get an Uber.” but he’s already picking your bag up and walking out of the room through a group of boys who recognize what happened by the way their eyes widen when they see you stumble after Satoru but say nothing.

When you plop into the passenger seat of his car, you don't know what to think. Should you have done that? At a party at that? He didn't even take you to his room. It's not long until you're simultaneously fighting the urge to puke and fall asleep, but you can’t tell if it’s regret or alcohol. The drive to your dorm is short, and when he reaches the building he rounds the car, opening the door and holding his hand out to you with a boyish expression, you smile to yourself

"What’s got you smilin’ like that?" he mused, easily lifting you from where you sat and steading you with another hand on your lower back.

"Nothing in particular . Just happy," he doesn’t respond to that, just squeezes your hand a bit.

...

"Is that who you were talking to? Oh, my- did you guys fuck?"

"Max, let me sleep." You know she heard that through the pillow you have over your face, but she doesn't pay it any mind.

"The QB, huh? He's a total upgrade from ese cabrón."

QB?

"QB! That's how I knew him! He's the fucking quarterback!"

"Did you seriously not remember... he's has an article written every other day."

"It blanked on me, I guess. I just kept thinking he looked so familiar."

"That's like when girls used to read at concerts to seem mysterious." She's giggling at first, but when your pillow hits her square in her face, she's practically rolling on the floor.

"So, what now? Gonna be a cheerleader to live out that cliche?"

You roll your eyes at her, but a part of you feels disappointed when you think about how things will be now.

"Doesn't matter. Not like it meant anything."

...

“Remember me?"

Of course, you do.

"No."

He knows you're lying. You can tell by the way his smile deepens despite your words. His head dips to yours, just a nudge away from your lips.

"Oh~ Satoru! Thank you! Thank y-" You slap your hands over his mouth and frantically look around the halls to see if anyone noticed. Thankfully, most people are more focused on Satoru as they walk by and not on your flustered expression.

"Why are you here, Gojo?" it's not that the sight of him doesn't make you nervous, much less his proximity. But you genuinely do not know why he's talking to you.

"Oh, so we're on a last names basis now? ‘ts not fair, though. I don't even know your last name, sweetheart. Should I just use mine?" he hums, obviously not worried about your apprehension.

"Wait? No? Wh-"

"No?" He pouts, batting his eyelashes. You know it's a joke, but your heart still drops.

"I don't mean 'no' like 'no,' I just- I don't know why you're talking to me. Or how you knew how to find me."

He just shrugs, grinning. “I would love to answer all of those questions… preferably over a nice meal.” his hand falls to his stomach and his head falls to his shoulder. “‘m just so hungry, sweetheart.”

You know what he’s getting at. And maybe if he wasn’t so damn cute, you’d say no. but you can’t ignore that airy feeling floating around you as he smiles at your meek nod. As shallow as it may be, you can’t help the validation you feel at just the idea of someone like Gojo would even give you the time of day. You find that he at least acts like a gentleman. Opening the car door for you. Walking on the side closest to the street. Opening the door to the diner for you.

It’s a homey thing. black-and-white checkered tiles, red walls with tons of polaroids and framed pictures of food and happy families, and a shiny red jukebox that steals your attention.

“Hello, how may I- why are you here?”

“I missed u too, Hime,” he cooed, batting his eyelashes toward a very unamused girl. “Don’t be shy~ I know you missed your favorite customer.”

“Missed you like the plague.” She sneers with a creased brow. Her hand taps on the screen in front of her before flipping her navy-blue pigtails over her shoulders, revealing a name tag that reads “Utahime.”

“Let me show you to your table,” she says, and you don’t miss the way she shoves Gojo out of the way with her shoulder when she walks past him. She guides you two to a booth in the diner's corner with seats the same shade as the walls and tells you that someone ‘will be with you shortly’ after walking away, not without throwing another nasty look at Gojo, and a simple nod to you.

“I’m her best friend , she just has a hard time showing it,” he says, readjusting himself on the leather seats.

“You woulda had me fooled…” you mumble, a little startled when he laughs in response. It’s oh-so warm and you let yourself bask in it quietly, forgetting what you came here for.

but after a bit of conversation over the menu and your orders, you build up enough courage to ask.

“So, what did you need?”

“Hmm?” and the way he tilts his head at the question makes your face warm.

“You took the effort to find my class, must need something important from me.” you say, listening to the buzz from the large overhead fan above you, and the smooth jazz coming from somewhere behind you.

“you’re right,” he says, turning at the same time to thank the server for your food s. “there actually is something important that I need.”

oh?

“You know,” he says, picking around his food with his head resting on his palm. “Ever since we slept together, I can't stop thinking about you.”

oh?

“It’s only been a night!” you squeak, quieting down when you see a server walk by.

“I know. I can’t get you off my mind.”

“So?”

“Don't you wanna get over your stupid ex-boyfriend? he's a real sight for sore eyes, and by that, I mean painful to look at. Especially compared to my looks.”

“I'm not interested!” you whine through your teeth, crushing your straw.

“But then, how else should I calm my heart?”

“What are you talking about?”

“Don't you get it, doll?” he asks, waving his fork in a circle toward you. “I'm mad for you.”

You almost choke on your drink. Gojo Satoru, mad for you. It’s either a fairytale come true or a sick joke. “But then, what is it you want from me?”

“A chance. A fair one. Let me prove to you that your ex is an idiot.”

[charmac]

Do you have any headcanons on macs experiences with men while he was in the closet? (Prior to Charlie catches a leprechaun) do you think he went to gay bars/did things w men or do you think he was too deep in denial and repression? I always love hearing your takes on the gang!

Ooo good question. Honestly I believe he's been hooking up with men since Season 8 when he was really, deeply repressed and was able to be gay with genuinely thinking it wasn't gay at all.

i.e. I believe 100% the gag in Charlie and Dee Find Love was that Trevor was fucking Mac, but Mac actually, genuinely believe that was considered wrestling. (The Maniac showed him that move...which begs a question...)

And to support my claim, Mac openly just -going for it- with Dennis in Recycles their Trash kinda proves he's not even registering what he's doing is gay/inappropriate/out of place, like yeah this is a thing that feels good that I'm gonna do.

To me, Season 8 establishes that he was clearly just kind of falling into gay situations that he didn't see as gay because there was some 'manlier' aspect behind them (wrestling and, uh, celebrating with your buddies, I suppose?). I like the idea that, you know, if he shuts up he's pretty cute, he's dumb, and he's very into complimenting men, so it's not far off to assume that when he wasn't with the Gang and doing his own thing, he was -falling into guy's laps- so to say, just by way of his existence... Things like Mac Day expose him where he's just greasing up guys on the side...very manly, nothing gay, he's popping boners but it's not gay because it's muscles and competition and that's too manly to be gay. And if any of those guys every noticed his boner and decided they needed a massage a little lower, or maybe needed to test his strength pumping, or his jaw.. well, that's just all part of making sure they're in top shape, and they're giving him some fitness tips in return, that's so nice

I think Season 10 threw him back into the actual seeking these things out life when he wasn't so repressed he was blind to what's gay (S8), he was having genuine gay experiences just off the street, in his various male-dominated situations (S9) but he's still too homophobic to admit what he wants. Misses the Boat pushed him over the line, probably... He used to be a party boy, but he gave that up for Dennis... He doesn't go out to clubs or bars anymore because that's harder not to see as explicitly gay until he does. He has to pretend to like being with a woman and now, it's impossible. It's impossible to ignore he's not into it, and he's opened a door to a lifestyle where Dennis has told him they won't ask any questions. (Not to mention he's now living in Dee's living room, with Dennis, Dennis who keeps rejecting his advances, almost on top of him. He's got no space to himself, but clubs and bars.. well that's a really easy place to meet someone that's willing to take you back to their place, since you don't have your own...)

Why do you think the Suburbs were so hard for him, alone, isolated, a sexless marriage with Dennis... he's so pent up because he's gotten used to something...

In summary: I imagine Leprechaun wasn't his first gay bar experience, or his first experience at the Rainbow, but I think 11 was probably the Season (maybe end of 10, probably right before) that he started going out fully, intentionally. But for years before that he was just so clearly gay, yet repressed, that he was constantly getting himself into gay situations organically, at first unknowingly gay to him, then it slowly wore into his thick skull that he's gay and this is all gay and it, well, feels too good to stop...so keep on leaning in...

[barbieaiden]

1. Kell: Dude. You're no fun to play with, you're too good.

Aiden: Kell, I love you, but I think you just suck at the game.

Kell: Dude! I always won against my siblings!

Aiden: Aww. I always let my brother win too when we were little.

Kell: You're cheating.

Aiden: I would never. I take these things very seriously.

2. Kell: By the way, you know that guy I went on a date with before your coma?

Aiden: Yeah?

Kell: Yeah, we were supposed to go on another date literally the day you got into the coma, so obviously I was like "dude, I can't make it, my friend is having a literal medical emergency", and he was like "okay, I'll just break this off here then, bye".

Aiden: Oh nooo. Did I cockblock you with my coma?

Kell: You literally did!

3. Aiden: I'll make it up to you. I'll wingman you so hard. I'll introduce you to literally everyone I know.

Kell: Isn't that, like, the entirety of River Bay?

Aiden: Almost, yeah. So you're bound to find someone.

Kell: Dude, you did not win again.

Aiden: You practically let me.

Kell: Dude!

Peyton: Is now a bad time to say hi?

4. Aiden: Peyton! NO, of course not. I didn't even know you were here, it's been so long!

5. Peyton: Yeah, I seem to recall being ignored for a month?

Aiden: Sorry about that. I was sleeping.

Peyton: For a month?

Aiden: Doctor's orders.

Peyton: Ah, of course. Totally reasonable.

6. Aiden: But don't worry. I'm back in my element.

Peyton: Do I want to know what that means?

Aiden: It means I'm ready to annoy the fuck out of you and text you every millisecond 24/7.

Peyton: Okay, I can get behind that.

7. Peyton: how are you doing?

Aiden: Great.

Peyton: "Great"? Really?

Aiden: So great. How are you? Are you still working at the mall?

Peyton: I quit impulsively a few weeks ago. I should probably get a new job if I want to be able to pay rent, but, eh. Video games are more fun.

Kell: If you're evicted you can move into Sam and Aiden's closet, I hear it's pretty empty nowadays.

Aiden: Totally.

8. Kell: Peyton, you're good at connect 4, right?

Peyton: I'd say so.

Kell: Help me win. Please.

Aiden: Who's cheating now?

Kell: There's no rule that says you can't have someone help you.

Peyton: Don't put it there. One step right.

Kell: Here?

Peyton: Yeah.

9. Aiden: Peyton, I love you so much.

Kell: Dude. Did you just make me lose?

Peyton: [Shrug]

Kell: Fuck you. Both of you.

[New scene]

10.

Sam: You met Aiden right after the car crash.

Jordan: Yes.

Sam: How bad was it? He never told me.

Jordan: Considering the crash, his injuries were very mild.

Sam: But he could've died.

Jordan: He didn't. And I don't think you need to worry about something that happened six years ago.

Sam: No, I just...

Jordan: Just what?

Sam: I don't know.

11. Sam: I hated Aiden when we first met.

Jordan: According to Kell's accounts you were simultaneously in love with him?

Sam: Attracted to. There's a difference.

Jordan: Not to me.

Sam: And how many successful relationships have you had?

Jordan: Well... I've certainly had relationships, I can tell you that much.

12. Sam: Don't you get tired of talking to new people all the time? How do you even find so many people you're interested in? I did it once and now I'm marrying him so I never have to do it again.

Jordan: It's easy if you're drunk and have very, very low standards. It also helps if you're fresh off a 13 hour shift at a hospital.

Sam: That sounds awful.

Jordan: I don't necessarily recommend it.

13. Sam: But you keep doing it.

Jordan: I suppose I have nothing better to do after those 13 hour shifts.

Sam: I'm so glad I dropped out of med school.

Jordan: You should be.

14. Sam: I'm just going to get some water.

Jordan: Okay.

15. Lucas: No, I had to do it because Michael thought it was "rude".

Michael: It was.

Lucas: If I pay for something, I want what I paid for. That's not rude. If I fuck someone's tattoo up I'd fix it.

Michael: You can't compare a meal to something that's permanently on someone's body.

Lucas: You agree with me.

Peyton: Oh, yeah.

Lucas: Exactly!

16. Peyton: Hey, Sam. How are you doing? Sleeping better?

Sam: A little.

Peyton: So... while you're here... Aiden.

Sam: Yes?

17. Peyton: He's acting... suspiciously normal, isn't he?

Lucas: Right? I literally told Michael the same thing ten minutes ago. This is the way Aiden always acts after medical emergencies, he just pretends everything's fine.

18. Sam: It's been a month. Things have gone back to normal, he's not pretending.

Lucas: No, sorry, no offense, Sam, but I don't think you get it. You weren't there all the other times he had to go to the hospital because of drugs--and that shouldn't be plural, by the way--this happens every time.

19. Lucas: He says he's fine and that he's clean now and then he just waits until people stop asking him about it and we're back at square one.

Sam: This was different though.

Lucas: Just because it was worse and because he maybe went through a tiny little bit of withdrawal while unconscious doesn't mean he's magically better.

Michael: Lucas, please.

20. Michael: You yourself said that there's nothing we can do.

Lucas: Well, we can't exactly force him to do anything but there's a difference between overcaring and pushing him away, and being so passive it turns into enabling.

Michael: I agree, but I don't think that has anything to do with Sam.

Lucas: I didn't say it does.

21. Lucas: I just don't want him dead, that's all.

Peyton: I seriously doubt any of us want him dead.

Lucas: Exactly. So we can't just trust that he's better because he says he is.

Sam: That's not what--[Sigh] I don't think it's fair to talk about this behind his back.

22. Lucas: I'd love to discuss this with him directly but he makes it pretty difficult. There's a reason he didn't want to talk to us for a fucking month.

Sam: Maybe it wasn't deliberate. Maybe he was just recovering from a coma.

Lucas: But he was talking to literally everyone else during that time, wasn't he? It's not a coincidence he ignored me, Michael, and Peyton specifically.

23. Sam: I... I don't know his motivation. And either way I don't want to be involved in this.

Peyton: That's fair. I didn't really mean for this to be a whole discussion.

Lucas: Sorry. Look, my point is just... if he's clean, that's fucking great. But I kind of doubt it. Just... keep an eye on him.

Sam: I always am.

[thewulf]

Interesting || Joel Miller

Summary: I’m craving some more Joel Miller angst to fluff. Hurt/Comfort even? And some Ellie! I haven’t seen much Ellie in your work so maybe her to? Up to you. Timeline set closer to the second game/season... Read Rest Here

A/N: Well... I started playing the second TLOU game and I got to that Abby scene and I'm... a mess. I don't think I can watch the second season of TLOU lmaooo byeee... ANYWAY please enjoy. Heads up - my summer classes are staring up so I'll be slowing way down on my posting for the next 8 weeks. Love you guys!

Pairing: Joel Miller x Y/N

Word Count: 6.5k+

It was cold. So fucking cold. You didn’t have your heavy jacket on you when you had to flee. Running for days. Days turned to nights turned back to days. You had to keep running. Every time you stopped they caught up to you. Hunted. That’s what was going on now. How sick. What a fun world. Hunted for fun at this point.

You kept going until your feet couldn’t physically move anymore. This was it. Hopefully the cold or the hunger took you before they found you. The same group of men who murdered your partner and his girlfriend so easily. Your partner and your good friend not thirty feet from you. Killed as if they weren’t anything. No mercy. Shot right in the chest five time each. You’d been out to use the restroom when they were ambushed. You were saved by mere minutes and a decision.

You’d wanted to scream. The people you’d been traveling the country with after escaping the Austin QZ years prior had been killed so senselessly. They weren’t infected. They weren’t a bother. They weren’t even hunting the area. They were killed for sport. For fun. No use. It’d been nearly twenty years since outbreak days and the horrors that humans committed still never sat right with you. It was so pointless. So senseless. It hurt knowing people were just cruel to be cruel.

It was life or death now. You were standing thirty feet from them and miraculously hadn’t spotted you yet. You took off without another thought. You didn’t have the right boots. You didn’t have the right coat. But this was your only chance. It was either that or get gunned down. As hellish as the world was you had some fucking sick desire to keep living in it. Good old human instinct. Fight to the very end.

You ran until you couldn’t anymore. Until you needed to rest. Finding a tree, you slid down to base of it using the trunk as a pillow. Sleep never came easy before but now? Now it seemed impossible when you were actively being hunted. But you needed it. You had to. So, you tried. Tried your best to get some sleep.

 You felt it before you saw it. Fuck. Maybe you slept longer than you thought you would? How had they caught up to you already? You felt the barrel of some sort of rifle pressed to your temple like you’d felt so many times before. Would this finally be the time a bullet would actually be fired? Your end met?

You were able to turn getting quick look at whomever it was. To your utter surprise it was a girl. A small girl. Not a raider. Maybe just maybe you could talk your way out of this one.

“Who the fuck are you?” She tried to sound intimidating. You knew because you did the exact same. The both of you had to be brash. Aggressive. It was life or death outside the walls of a QZ.

You closed your eyes calculating what the hell to do. Tell her the truth? Lie straight to her face? Try and divert the conversation?

“Where am I?” You asked hearing your voice for the first time in days. It almost sounded foreign to you now.

She scoffed rolling her eyes pushing the gun further into your head, “I asked who the fuck you were.” You closed your eyes slowly feeling he cool metal pushing into the side of your head. She wasn’t going to do it. She didn’t want to do it.

“Y/N. You need to go.” You shivered feeling the effects of the melted snow crawling its way up your jeans. You didn’t have your sleeping bag to shield you between the ground and your clothes.

The barrel of the gun dropped slightly so it wasn’t contacting your head. She must’ve seen the fear in your eyes, “Why would I do that?” She still had the gun pointed at you. You wiggled your legs hoping you’d regain the feeling. You sighed knowing you still wouldn’t make it that far on foot. You were truly gassed.

“I’m being hunted. They’re bound to be here soon kid.” You didn’t feel like elaborating as you closed your eyes leaning your head back on the tree. How had it come to this? How did he die before you? He was the more careful one. He was the more calculated one. He was the one that deserved to live. Not you.

She frowned dropping the gun completely now, “What?”

Eyes opening slightly, you noticed her more relaxed stance, “Some raiders,” You sighed recalling what you’d been through in the last three days. Horror. Definitely your worst three days since outbreak day, “They killed my partner and his girlfriend. I’ve been running from them for a few days. I don’t really know anymore. Every time I think I’ve lost them they catch right back up.” You felt the tears coming on. You’d thought you’d already cried them out over the last three days but apparently not. You would have never of dreamed of crying in front of a stranger like this before. But what’d you have to lose at this point? You’d accepted your death. Who really cared if you cried in front of her. It didn’t matter. None of it mattered anymore.

She groaned suddenly very conflicted, “Fuck.” She threw her rifle over her shoulder, “Stay here.” You nodded seeing her jump on her horse and trot off calling for somebody named Joel.

You smiled knowing it was likely nearing the end for you. She didn’t have the guts to kill you. Not that you blamed her, you wouldn’t either. But you understood the world you now lived in. She had to go get this Joel person to do it. It was fine. You just hoped they would make it quick. Have some mercy on you. The raiders wouldn’t. They would take their time with you since you ran. Maybe it wasn’t the worst option.

You closed your eyes hoping maybe the darkness would take over again. But your wishes didn’t come true when you heard the girl’s voice shout, “Over here.” A much deeper than hers responded with a grunt. Must’ve been the Joel she was calling for.

“Ellie, this is a bad idea. Let’s head back.” You had to agree with him. This was a very bad idea. You tried moving your legs again, but you were left with literally nothing. You knew you weren’t paralyzed because you could feel them. They just didn’t have enough energy to move.

You just knew she was rolling her eyes. She seemed like the type, “Shut up. She’s right over here.” You heard her voice get much closer, “Found ya!” She grinned jumping down from her horse, “Over here old man!” She shouted a little too loudly for your comfort. What if the raiders were close?

“You did.” The smile that crossed your lips was rare. But you knew these would be your last moments anyway. Why not smile? Why not show that human emotion that always wanted to come out but had been refused for decades at this point.

“I brought you these. Well, actually Joel did. But he didn’t need them. You do. So here you go.” She handed you a pile of beef jerky and a bottle of what you assumed to be water.

You took them quickly before looking at her curiously, “Are you sure?”

“Yeah. Eat up.” She nodded watching you expectedly. You didn’t want to question her, but you had to wonder what the hell she was up to? Maybe they weren’t going to shoot you right then and there.

You shook your head in disbelief. You hadn’t a clue that Joel had been and continued to watch the interaction between the two women before him. Your smile was something like he hadn’t seen in years. It struck a small feeling in his heart as he watched your soft expression study Ellie. He didn’t like that he was thinking these thoughts about you. Last time he let that happen his heart was shattered in an instant when she was bitten. It’s a cruel fucking world he wished he didn’t have to participate in. He’d only looked at you for thirty god damned seconds and you had him questioning everything. What in the hell was wrong with him?

“Why?” You were too curious for you own good.

She shrugged, “Why not?”

You laughed in retort, “I can think of about a million reasons…” Joel smiled enjoying your truthfullness. He knew how sharp you had to be to survive with a partner out in the open let alone by yourself. He didn’t want to be impressed but with each word you spoke he grew a tad more curious.

Ellie stopped you by shaking her head quickly, “Just eat. Are you really arguing about the food right now?” She raised an eyebrow sitting down next to you.

You nodded, “Fair.” Taking a big bite of the jerky not really giving a damn what you looked like. This was everything you needed and more.

“Joel, you can come out now.” Ellie rolled her eyes. You felt a strange solace sitting by the girl. A comfort you rarely felt towards anybody let alone a complete stranger. She was so warm towards you. Unafraid of what you could be capable of. A pure heart.

You watched as the older man slowly approached watching the both of you cautiously. You smiled softly observing his careful nature. You took him in for a moment too long. Eyes making contact on accident you looked away quickly. Making sure to thank Ellie for the food. You knew you wouldn’t make it anywhere without it. Whether she’d admit it or not she literally did save your life.

Even you had to admit he was rather handsome. You’d have guessed he was fifteen or so years older than you. It didn’t mean you couldn’t appreciate what was right in front of you though. I mean come on. He was tall, muscular, gruff, and handsome. So, fucking handsome. It’d been a long time since you’d been able to appreciate a man’s attractiveness, but here you were. Appreciating him. How could you not? The man was everything you could’ve dreamed up.

“Sorry for him. He’s like this normally. Grumpy old dude.” She smiled seeing you devour the second strip. Whether you wanted to admit it or not you were starving, and the jerky strips were delicious.

“You infected?” He asked taking a small, cautious step forward.

You shook your head quickly, “No, I promise I’m not.” You put your hands up when his gun made aim for you. Oddly, you didn’t feel threatened by it. You knew he was doing it for their protection. Again, nothing you wouldn’t do. “Are you alone?” He looked around skeptically as if he didn’t believe your story. Like you’d planned an ambush or something. You didn’t blame him. You’d operated the same way until they got killed. You could never be too careful. You had to laugh to yourself, in a different world the two of you would’ve made amazing partners. You’d agreed with his and her tactics along each step in the overly cautious first meeting.

You nodded your head, “Technically yes. But I am being tracked. Hunted if you will.” You didn’t want to lie to him either. You watched as his hardened face took in your words and softened ever so slightly as he truly registered your words. Hunted. Who would hunt you?

You didn’t give him much time to respond as you went through the same story you told Ellie an hour prior. How the only people you’d loved for so long had been killed so mercilessly. While you were alone you weren’t alone out here. He understood taking a second looking at Ellie before turning back to you.

“Come on.” He sighed pointing at Ellie, “You’re explanin’ this to Tommy and Maria.” He grumbled before hopping on his horse trotting away without waiting on the two of you.

Ellie’s grin instantly brought joy right to you. She wasn’t like anyone you’d met before. Pre or post outbreak. She stood giving you her hand, “Can you stand?”

You nodded knowing you were going to have to find your way onto the horse, “Yeah.” You took her hand letting her pull you up, “Thanks.” You mumbled finding your footing. Using your arm, you leaned on the tree while you let the blood rush through your legs again. Already feeling lightheaded from the exertion, you didn’t know how far you’d actually make it.

“Sure, think you can make it up on Shimmer?” She pointed to the brown horse with a white diamond on its forehead. It was the simple things like naming horses that felt so domestic it almost hurt you. You craved for the world that little 14-year-old you grew up in a lifetime ago. Where you could go horseback riding or apple picking without a care in the world.

You were 16 going on 17 when the world went to hell right before your very eyes. You’d been a lucky one already living in Austin when it was walled off and sealed from the outside world. You’d spent ten years living and working low wage jobs and living in shitty apartment with your brother before he was killed in a random shooting down in the streets not far from where you lived. You’d already lost your mom on outbreak day and your father not long after that.

Then you met him. Joseph. Joey. Your partner. You’d started with small runs just for extra cash, so you didn’t have to work those shitty jobs endlessly. Then he’d convinced you to go on the run with him. It only took him a few months then you’d agreed. You’d met Sasha on the way. His girl. She was quick and smart. You’d become fast friends and the three of you became a trio. For ten years you’d lived as such. You’d never found anyone. It was alright with you. You were just trying to survive. You were ready to live that way for the rest of your life. Overly content with your best friends.

That was until they were murdered.

“I can try.” You walked over slowly, carefully. Thankful for the food you’d eaten only moments prior given you a little strength. You’d managed to find the stirrup and hoist yourself up. Ellie noticed you struggling to throw your leg over, so she helped. Using he shoulder she pushed a leg up and over the smaller horse. You sighed feeling horrifically weak. Thank God you’d managed to be found by two people who weren’t going to hurt you.

“Thanks again, Ellie.” You mumbled grabbing onto her once she hopped in front of you to guide the horse back to wherever the hell they came from.

She kept her eyes forward as she had Shimmer move forward trying to catch up to Joel. She was still on patrol after all, “Yeah, no problem. You owe me though.” She grinned knowing you were kind enough not to argue back.

“Yeah, I mean I do. Saved my ass.” You leaned your head on her back as the horse trotted along. You didn’t want to, but you were exhausted. It was taking everything in you not to pass out right then and there. So, laying on her was your only option to saving the energy needed to stay awake.

You must’ve nodded in and out of consciousness as she shouted at you abruptly, “Y/N!”

“Yeah?” Your eyes opened in surprised. The gentle rhythm of the horses steps stopped so suddenly.

“You’ve gotta stay awake.” She sounded more annoyed than worried. You appreciated her for that. You had to admit you’d be acting the same way.

“I’m trying.” You hummed knowing you weren’t going to make it, “But I feel so heavy.” Your knew your words were slurring as you tried holding onto her tighter. You heard her call for Joel before you slumped into her further succumbing to the darkness in front of you.

You woke under the most comfortable set of covers in what looked to be a home in the woods. Turning in the bed you saw the fireplace was blazing lowly keeping the room cozy compared to the freezing outdoors that had nearly killed you. The memories of the last few hours came rushing back. Looking around you didn’t see anybody in the room with you. Where in the hell were you anyway?

When you stood you noticed the IV hooked up to your arm. That was probably why you were feeling so much fucking better. It was light out. Probably mid-day. That meant you were either out for almost a day since Ellie and Joel found you last night. You rolled the cart with you as you made your way to the bedroom door. You probably should’ve been more freaked out, but you still felt oddly calm about the whole situation. You’d already accepted your death, and this was somehow turning out to be the best-case scenario.

Opening the door, you braced for the worst thankful to be met by a mostly empty living room. The whole thing felt oddly familiar. Like your own family home so long-ago pre-outbreak. You tried walking out only to be stopped by the IV stand getting blocked in the doorway, “Shit.” You groaned knowing you had just inadvertently pulled out your IV and were probably profusely bleeding.

You quickly grasped your forearm with your free hand hoping to stop some of the blood flow.

“Oh! You’re up.” Ellie’s cheerful voice rang from behind you. Spinning around her face dropped once she saw the blood dripping from your arm, “Shit, Maria!” She called loudly for the woman. She just wasn’t good with this kind of stuff. She knew what she was good at and it certainly wasn’t care taking.

“Yes, Ellie?” The woman named Maria came running out of what you presumed to be the kitchen.

Ellie just pointed at you and your arm. Maria’s eyes followed. She didn’t say much before springing into action. She pulled you into the bathroom not far from your room.

“Sorry.” You spoke softly as she worked to close the IV line in your arm.

She shook her head, “It’s okay. Are you alright?” She did a once over of your appearance, much more pleased with your normal color rather than the ghostly pale one you came in with.

“I am. Much better. Thank you. For that. All of this.” You weren’t much for words. Joey never was. Sasha got you talking more often but even she tired of your shorter answers. Ever since your brother passed you hadn’t had much to speak into the world. A part of you died with him all those years ago.

She nodded slowly. Eyes right on the spot of the bleeding. She cleaned it up before wrapping it. Ellie stood in the doorway watching the whole thing. As much as she didn’t want to know she needed to know. She had to know these kinds of things. Maria wouldn’t always be around to do it for her.

“Sure thing.”

“Where am I?” You had to ask again. Ellie never gave you an answer when you asked the day prior. This was all so incredible to you. The bathroom lights worked. There was hot water coming out of the sink. The house smelled good and was well maintained. People lived here.

She stood up watching you admire the space before you. She knew how amazing it was. Especially when you hadn’t seen anything like it in years. Sure, the QZ had power, but it was spotty at best. It certainly didn’t have heat or air-conditioning. That was a luxury few had.

“Jackson, Wyoming.” She answered your question, “A small commune. We’ve been here for almost ten years now.

“Wow.” You walked out of the bathroom after Ellie moved looking around you. Ellie forgot how incredible it all really was. It was easy to get complacent, “This is amazing. I’ve never run into a place like this.”

She smiled, “Few and far in between. We stay quiet. For good reason.”

You nodded, “I won’t tell anyone, I promise. I’ll get out of your hair soon. Thank you for everything.”

She gave you a quizzical look, “Where are you going?” Ellie watched in almost amusement. Where did you think you were going?

You shrugged, “Not sure, I guess.” You didn’t have a plan, but it wasn’t staying here. You didn’t think you were wanted.

Maria laughed. Straight belly laughed in your face. Ellie joined in when she didn’t stop. You smiled feeling the contagion hit. You couldn’t even help the small laughs that left your lips. What another foreign fucking feeling. You hadn’t laughed in literal years. Joey wasn’t one for the giggles and Sasha always respected that. That was a piece of you that you thought died with your brother.

“You’re tough. That’s for sure. But you wouldn’t make it far. You’ll stay.” She said so matter of factly you weren’t even sure if you were going to question her. Like it was so unquestionable.

“Really?” You weren’t sure why you kept pressing your luck, but you did.

She nodded, “You’re young, able bodied and will be completely healed up here soon. We’d love to have you here.”

You looked out the front door in awe of the rows of homes that lined the street. You assumed you were in some sort of neighborhood. You watched as a pair of children raced down the street on bicycles screaming and laughing as the snow slush spit out behind them. You smiled as a neighbor tried to get their dog to come inside but clearly wasn’t having it. Everything looked and felt so oddly normal. Like you were taken and placed back in time from so long ago.

“Half a mile north is the town square. Joel and Ellie live a few houses down that way. We’ll put you up in a home across the street from them. Tommy and Joel just finished it up.” She pointed as she spoke.

You kept looking at her like it was all a big dream. Maybe the raiders really did get you. How were you to be the one to get so lucky? It just didn’t seem right.

You nodded afraid your voice would crack.

“Ellie, why don’t you show her the house? There’s a coat by the door for you. Ellie and I picked some clothes out for you while you were asleep and left them in the house.”

“Thank you. For all of this. I can’t even begin to thank you for everything.” Speaking quietly, you found it hard to look them in the eye. This wasn’t common. People being kind for the good of it. Because they didn’t want to kill.

She gave Maria a curt nod before putting her coat and shoes coaxing you along, “Come on Y/N.” You followed her out of Maria’s home after putting on the new boots she had gotten you. Again, you thanked her profusely still not used to the kindness. You were ready to do whatever the town needed now. Need a hunter? You’d learn. Patrol? You had a good shot. Gardner? That’s what you were good at.

You were used to walking quietly. Sasha would often fill the void with her chatter. You and Joey would occasionally chime in. Sometimes Sasha would find a topic that got you interested in for more than five minutes. Those times were rare though. You were merely surviving in this world. You weren’t here to thrive.

Ellie was apparently not used to walking in silence. She started bombarding you with questions the second you left the warmth of Maria’s home. The cold hit you like a ton of bricks. It amazed you how you were able to survive it in the open for as long as you did.

“Where are you from?” She asked once you got your bearings about you.

You smiled remembering that old life. The one that seemed so fucking simple compared to this, “Texas.”

“Just like Joel!”

A small smile crept over your lips. The two of you seemed to have so much in common the more you learned about him, “Oh yeah?”

She nodded smiling, “Yeah!”

“What about you? Where are you from Ellie?”

She shrugged, “Grew up in Boston.”

You had to laugh, “We’re far from home.”

She joined in, “Do we really have a home anymore?”

Looking down at her you didn’t try to hide the frown, “I’m afraid not. Especially now that I have no one. Again.” You felt defeated. Each time you started to build a life it was suddenly ripped right from your grasp. First your brother, then Joey and Sasha.

Her soft smile felt sincere as you nodded contemplating what to tell her. Again, what did you have to lose? Might as well tell her everything. So, everything you did. The two of you walked slow as you told her all about your brother. How he was killed. How you found a new person in Joey. How the rest turned to history.

She was fascinated by your story. She thought that she had been on an adventure but couldn’t fathom what you’d been through by being outside a QZ for nearly ten years. She hadn’t heard about many people like you. Probably because there weren’t many people like you. It was too brutal. Too risky. One slip up and it’s over. Joey and Sasha were proof of that. You should’ve been but you were lucky. So fucking lucky.

You were nothing short of amazed when you walked into the home, and it already seemed cozier than Maria’s. Everything was stocked with anything you could need. The kitchen cabinets were loaded, the clothes were piled high on the bed on the main floor.

You’d invited her to stay to keep talking. For whatever reason Ellie was able to pull it out of you. You wanted to talk to her. Ask her questions. She was so real in this fucked up world. Too often the people you came by tried to sugar coat the situation. She was refreshing. A rarity.

You were sure you would’ve kept going had Joel not walked right through the front door. Only freezing when Ellie let out a, “What the fuck are you doing in here?”

He turned giving her a stunned expression, “Me? What are you doing in here?” He’d known her for years now, but he never tired of her personality. He adored it. Adored the kid growing far too fast for his liking.

Ellie, again, pointed right at you making Joel’s eyes lock with yours. You gave him a soft grin, waving slowly feeling a tad uncomfortable by the attention. Joel relaxed immediately.

“You’re up? Already?” He so desperately wanted to walk forward and give you a once over. The strange desire to protect you hadn’t gone away. But he knew better. You can’t get attached in this world. Never ever. He’d already let Ellie in on his small circle. He couldn’t let it get too big. That’s when bad things started happening.

“I am.” You nodded. A woman of few words. What were you supposed to say? It’s not like he gave

“You look a lot better.” He commented before turning to Ellie again. He’d sit there and stare at you all day if it wasn’t so god damn creepy.

“I feel it too. Thank you.” You kept it short this time. Thanking him not only for the comment but for agreeing to help you in the woods.

He nodded feeling a small heat creep up his neck. He needed to snap the hell out of it and quick. He couldn’t be having physical reactions to such innocent comments. It seemed as if you were trying to kill him already and you didn’t even fucking know it. He was a goner, and he knew it. His only chance was to avoid you. But he had a feeling that’d be damn near impossible with you living right across the street and Ellies uncanny ability to make friends with almost anybody she wanted… he was toast.

Ellie noticed. Course she noticed. She loved picking on her surrogate father. A dude who’d never claimed to be but always took on the role. People problems? She ran to Joel. Gun issues? She called for Joel’s help. Issues with schoolwork? She used Joels contractor brain to solve her issues. It was her role as his self-proclaimed adopted daughter to make his life a living hell. A fun living hell.

“Y/N! Why don’t you come over for dinner tonight?” Ellie grinned giving Joel the side eye, “Joel’s making burgers and they’re so good.”

Joel’s eyes went wide as he glared at the girl. She had a knack for picking up on things far too quickly for his liking.

“Oh, I wouldn’t want to impose.” You spoke. It already felt like you were a burden on Joel. Hell, he wouldn’t even turn to look at you.

Joel turned back almost accepting defeat so soon, “It’s fine. It’s no imposition.” Short and to the point.

“Alright. I’ll come over.” You smiled sweetly at Joel hoping he’d know it was a thank you. You didn’t know how rare the smile Joel flashed you was. When he turned back to Ellie he was scowling once again. She hadn’t a clue he’d flashed you one too.

“Six work?” He asked.

You nodded, “Six works.”

“Okay.” He turned to leave before Ellie stood to stop him.

“Weren’t you here for something?”

He pointed at her, “The sink. Need to hook up the washer. Last thing.” He nodded at you as he disappeared off into the kitchen leaving the two of you once again. You continued talking until he left. Ellie got up to follow him over letting you get settled before tonight.

“He likes snickerdoodle cookies by the way.”

You had to laugh shaking your head, “Of course. Every Texan’s favorite cookie.”

She nodded her head excitedly, “So you know how to make them?”

“By heart. I’d never forget.”

She clapped her hands together. You were clueless as hell to her devious plan. Operation get Joel together with Y/N. Joel never showed interest in a single soul. So, the second he did Ellie was going to pounce on it. That was her promise, “Perfect. See you tonight with those snickerdoodles!” She waved before shutting your door. It still amazed you this was now your life. A little safe haven in the middle of no where Wyoming. What could go wrong?

You’d rapid fire knocked on their front door. It was so fucking freezing out here. How you didn’t freeze to death was a mystery.

Ellie flung the door open not too long after, “You look pretty.” She commented after taking your coat from you.

Smiling you nodded, “Showers help quite a bit.”

She shook her head, “No, I think your just a pretty person.

“Ellie!” Joel called through a door, “Would you stop?” That’s when Joels eyes caught yours. He was a bit taken aback. Ellie was right. You weren’t just pretty. You were drop dead fucking gorgeous. Who in the hell were you?

Your soft smile turned to one much larger, “It’s sweet. Thank you Ellie.” Ruffling her hair, you walked over to him. He wanted desperately to back away into the kitchen. You were all consuming. Too much for him to handle. But he also didn’t want to see you frown or get upset by his actions.

Handing him a small plate of cookies you grinned looking up at him, “For you. As a thank you. A little birdie told me you liked snickerdoodle’s.”

He laughed taking them from your grasp as gently as he could, “You didn’t have to.”

“I know. I wanted to. You’ve all been so kind. It’s a small thank you.”

He took them gratefully meeting your eyes again, “Come on in, burgers are almost done. I’m sure Ellie wants to show you around.”

She nodded, “Those cookies… are for me to? As a thank you?”

You laughed a good true laugh. One that was so absent from your life for so long, “Of course Ellie. I’ll even make some more if you ask.”

She immediately went to hug you tightly, “Thank you! Now come on, I wanna show you my room.” She grabbed your hand dragging you along without much reluctance.

Joel watched the innocent interaction with love in his eyes. It was easy for Ellie to make friends, but it wasn’t easy for her to actually like them. Ellie didn’t like many people. Joel most days. Maria sometimes. Tommy almost never. Dina all the time. She seemed to genuinely like you. He hadn’t seen Ellie so eager to help with such a spark in her eye. Like she found a sister. Somebody with a common bond.

Maybe it could work with you. You seemed sweet. He knew you were more than capable. Who in the hell just lives outside the QZ? You were mad and he kind of loved it. He’d known you for what? All of an hour and here he was planning stuff with you in mind? He was mad and he didn’t know if he loved it or not.

Joel was setting out the onion and tomato Ellie pulled from the garden earlier out when the two of you walked into the kitchen.

“So, who was your favorite singer before the outbreak happened?” Ellie asked ignoring Joel’s curious glance up from the kitchen.

You laughed remembering those days spent gossiping in the hallways of your high school. What you’d give to go live a day like that again, “Not a person, a band. NSYNC. God, they were everything to me. Sixteen and had dreams of marrying JC one day.” You hummed remembering the posters that lined your bedroom wall.

Ellie grinned ear to ear hearing that response, “Guess what I have on the CD player?” She wiggled her eyebrows.

“Shut the hell up. Don’t tell me you have an NSYNC album?” You beamed with excitement. Oh, how long it’d been since you’d heard that band sing. You’d occasionally hear music hear and there. Nothing consistent though.

“I do! After dinner we can listen.” Ellie looked proud of herself Joel noticed. You looked like a little kid in a candy store eating that information up.

“That was Sarah’s favorite band too. That or what’s the other one? The Back Boys?” Joel joined in setting the burgers down at the table. He’d taken a seat next to you and not Ellie at the four-person table.

“The Backstreet Boys.” You laughed appreciating that he somewhat remembered, “I liked them. But preferred NSYNC. Who’s Sarah?” You never knew when things would get awkward, but you felt the air shift in the room.

“My daughter.” Joel answered forgetting you weren’t already part of the family. How quickly you seemed to mold in.

You nodded deciding not to press further, “She has wonderful taste.”

“Had.” He sighed knowing you weren’t planning on leaving anytime soon. What would be the use in hiding it or lying about it? The truth always came out. It could never hide, “She was shot on outbreak day.”

You nodded in understanding. You’d lost as much as he had at the same time, “I’m sorry. It never gets easier does it?”

He shook his head, “Never. Who’d you lose?” He didn’t care for pleasantries and what was proper. He wanted to get to know you the real you. You prepared your burger as you thought of your answer. Taking your time letting Joel know you needed it.

“My mom on outbreak day. My dad a few days later. Shot by FEDRA. My brother ten years after that. Killed in a Firefly incident.” You leaned back in your chair observing his reaction while he studied yours.

He nodded silently while fixing his plate.

“Was life fun?” Ellie asked, “Before?”

You laughed taking a long swig of the iced tea Joel had poured for you, “My life was. It was amazing. It wasn’t perfect but it was everything.”

Joel nodded in agreement, “It surely wasn’t perfect. There was stress. But it was different.”

You smiled, “I prefer that stress. Can I afford my gas this week? Rather than am I dying today?”

It got a chuckle out of both of them as Joel nodded agreeing with you, “Much preferred to this.”

Before anybody could respond the landline rang. It was a sound so unfamiliar it had you jumping out of your seat, “Is that a telephone?”

Joel nodding with a slick smirk on his face, “They have everything here.”

Ellie shot up from her seat, “That might be Dina! I told her to call after her patrol. Do you mind?” She gave Joel the cheesiest grin. He simply waved her off which was his signal to let her know it was fine, she could go.

You watched him watch her. It was clear he loved her dearly. Maybe even as much as a daughter. You hadn’t met many men like him, but you knew he was special. Just like Ellie was. You’d needed this so bad. So, fucking desperately. Just when you didn’t think you could go on it’s like the universe gave you a new purpose. One to simply exist and learn now. Grow and feel safe again. Like the challenge had been conquered and you were being given your reward. You just needed to take it. He was sitting right there watching you now, lost in thought.

He didn’t turn once you caught him staring. He just smiled and continued watching. You decided to ignore him and start eating. Too enticed by the smell rather than wait on Ellie.

He grinned joining you, “You’re very interesting, Y/N.” He simply stated after taking a large bite from his burger.

“Hopefully a good interesting and not a bad one.” Your heart sped up as he acknowledged you.

“Definitely the good one.” He tipped his head as if there was a hat on his head, “We don’t get too many new commers around here. When we do they’re usually stuffy. It’s nice to have ya. A nice change.” That’d definitely been the most he had spoken to you since you got here, and it was incredibly kind. He was trying and that was simply more than you could ask for. Just as Ellie had sensed it you had too. You’d seen his apprehension die down as he got to know you just a bit more. He was beginning to feel calm in your presence. Bringing out the good in him.

“Thank you Joel.” You felt the heat rise to your cheeks. You didn’t bother putting makeup on. Honestly, you’d forgotten how to do it. And why would you have needed it? You had forgotten how blissfully your cheeks exposed you at the drop of a hat.

“Anytime darlin’, anytime.” He didn’t know where in the hell this was going to end up, but he was starting to get more than excited for the ride he was about to take. The gleam in your eye told him he needed to buckle up or you’d buck him right on off.

Taglist: @loving-and-dreaming

[octuscle]

Hello support! I hope you can help me because I am not good with this kind of tech and I don't want to make a mess! You see, I have taking bad decisions all my life. I decided to ignore I was gay and lived a straight life for 40 years... I never took care of my appearance and now I am a 42 yo man with a bellly, and I don't seem to be making any progress at gym.

I think... I feel like it's too late. I feel that even if I change the way I live from now on, I have lost too much time, too many experiences... and I want to use Chronivac to turn my life 180º. I don't really have a specific type of life in mind, but I hope you have some great presets for me.

Can you help, please? Thanks!

Fuck, dude! You've been sweating out your sexual desires your whole life? And this pathetic body is all you've achieved in the gym? Okay, good that you came to me. It would be terrible if things got any worse. Lie down, get some sleep, I'll take care of it.

Since your wife threw you out on the street, you've been living in a small boarding house until you find something better. The bathroom is in the hallway and you share it with the other tenants. Most of them are plumbers and other tradesmen working on a construction site in the area. They wait in front of the toilet. It's occupied, of course. You hear the flush. The door opens. A mason of the highest caliber comes out. His dick is still sticking out of his pants, which he only closes casually. You make eye contact. A little too long. The synapses in your brain run amok. You go to the bathroom. You leave the door unlocked. You drop your pants. The door opens. Jackpot!

You did good for a virgin. You blow like the devil. And you know how to massage a cock in your tight asshole. The men waiting outside the toilet grin shamelessly as first the bricklayer and then you come out. One of them slips you a note with his phone number and tells you to call him. Shit, you forgot to piss because of all the sex. And you haven't showered either. What time is it anyway? Dude, you're a little out of it. It's only 6:30. Sure, the workers are already leaving. But you just got off work. Being a doorman is a hard job. Lie down first. Your landlady already knows. Breakfast is usually served at 16:00.

The first guests are already coming home when you wake up. Dressed only in your jockstrap, you shuffle across the hall to the bathroom. There are phone numbers on the walls. Usually with a crude drawing of a cock above it. You take your magnificent piece out of your underpants. 20 centimeters flaccid. With an impressive PA on top. Fits well in your calloused hand. As you pee, your eyes wander up your forearms. Were those tattoos there yesterday?

You're sitting in the breakfast room in your tracksuit. You're watching porn on your cell phone. One hand always on your dick. You're always horny. Hey, 42 is no age. You're at the peak of your manhood. You grab your gym bag, kiss the landlady goodbye, and head to the shabby basement boxing gym in the red-light district.

It's around 8 p.m. when you come out into the fresh air. Three hours of hard training, jumping rope, punching bag, sparring, technique training, lifting weights. And then a cold shower. No soap. No deodorant. Routine for more than ten years. And it shows. Fuckin' fit. A machine. You belong here, among hookers, pimps and drug dealers. This is your world. You go to your favorite falafel restaurant almost every night. Because the falafel is good. And because the chef's son is hot and horny. Dinner and a fuck - a good way to start the evening. And then you open your club. It was always your dream to create a gay club, bar and brothel concept. You had the right instinct. The concept has been successful for years. Partygoers love your place. Within an hour or two, the dance floor and dark rooms are full.

You're one of the toughest bouncers in town. But it's also one of the hottest clubs in the city. And you're only at the door until two or three o'clock. Then you check the situation in the club. And if there's something hot to fuck, you check the situation in the darkrooms particularly carefully.

[obsessedtomone]

Unravel Yourself Before Me ⛓️ Chapter 8 - Close Call▸Shigaraki x femReader

Chapter Summary:

◤ From the moment he saw you in the convenience store, he thought you were a major fucking pain in the ass.

The way you stared at him in disgust—the way everyone fucking stared at him—like he was some piece of garbage to be thrown out, made him want to strangle you until he saw the light leaving your eyes. You thought you were so fucking cool, talking back to him when you had no clue who he was or what he was capable of.

Absolutely fucking clueless. ◢ Setting: University AU - No quirks (unless degenerate personalities count) Tags: Slow burn, Eventual Smut, Unhealthy/Toxic Relationships, Humiliation, Mentally Ill Reader, Angst, Hurt/Comfort, Enemies to ??? Warning: Dead Dove – Do Not Eat | Mind the tags TW: Implied Su/Self H, Dubcon, Reader has a super shitty past like actually, Shigaraki Tomura is his own warning.

AO3 Crosspost | Chain Divider by firefly-graphics

Chapters: One • Two • Three • Four • Five • Six • Seven • Eight • Nine Updates every Monday!

Chapter 8 - Close Call

The changing colors, seeping through the old glass panels of your dirty windows and dancing against your almost white walls were the only indication that time was actually passing—leaving you behind.

Occasionally there would be a loud motorcycle racing down the empty street, or you would hear neighbors arguing with each other somewhere alongside the building.

Your head was now hanging off your bed and you were boring holes into the space. Maybe you’d be lucky to form a blood clot on your brain, have a stroke and die.

You’d snort at the thought, but you’re too tired to fucking care. Instead, you only feel empty, empty, empty.

Somewhere deep down, you think you feel hungry too.

When was the last time you had eaten? You’ve probably been laying on your bed like this for hours today.

You – im taking the next few days off, dont come over i’ll be fine

Despite your phone ringing for days, your friend knew better than to try and come over when you felt like this. You still don’t pick up.

This type of shut-down happened only one other time during your friendship, somewhere last year when your ex found out where you lived and showed up to talk.

Talk with his fist against your face when you told him—knife in your hand—to fucking dare get any closer.

Taylor's impeccable sixth sense, otherwise known as obsession to bother you whenever it suited them best, saved you that day…from trying to slice his fucking throat open.

You don’t remember how your friend got rid of him, especially when you’d told them you’d get in big trouble if they called the authorities to report him, but after the adrenaline passed, you had crashed for two weeks.

It worried them sick. That, you remember.

They eventually called the police and the paramedics to break into your apartment, but you just stood there, confused. You ended up warning Taylor to leave you alone when this happened, the presence of people—of the fucking police—only draining you and pushing you over the edge.

You’d be fine soon, but everyone needed to fuck off.

The officer had gotten really angry after realizing you were cognizant enough to stay out of the psych ward, and almost wrote both of you up for wasting his time with dramatics.

Taylor doesn’t fully understand why or how you end up shutting down. They never feel the need to hide away from the world, no matter how traumatic any incident was to them.

In fact, it was quite the opposite for your friend. Where you would hide from everyone, they would distract themselves with parties, drugs, hook-ups. Anything to make it better. You weren’t like them, though.

You were you.

That however, didn’t stop Taylor from blowing up your phone—asking, offering, pestering you every single day, if they could bring you something to eat at least.

You don’t reply.

You need space.

Space to pretend you don't exist.

Expecting to be fired, you had called your manager Gene (you don’t remember at what point, though), to tell him you didn’t really know when you’d be available to take another shift. He told you not to worry about it and take as many days off as you needed “kid”.

It reminded you that not all people in the world were assholes. That at least some people cared about you.

You could probably count the amount of nice things anyone’s done to you on your fingers.

So you do. You raise your hand in front of your face, while your head is still hanging off the bed, and start literally counting on your fucking fingers.

There was Taylor—you put one finger down.

There was your manager—you put a second finger down.

There was also that guy at the arcade, the one you should probably quit worrying about. You didn’t message him again after you told him you would, and it still fucking bothers you for some reason. Despite that, he counted as someone who was nice to you. You put a third finger down.

Would he be weirded out if you messaged him now? Maybe you could hit the arcade with someone outside your bubble, and forget you were you for a second. You end up spacing out again.

A distant ringtone brings you out of your daze and you glance at your phone. You’d changed your number. Was that last week? How many days have passed?

You don’t remember.

You should probably order take-out before you pass out again.

Fast food, you think.

Yeah, fast food sounds really damn good right now, fuck your savings.

Dead people need no savings.

The phone is still ringing. You reach for it and look at the display. Unknown number.

Against your better judgment, you pick up. You still hoped it wasn’t another creep looking for a hook-up. If it was, maybe you’d take them up on it, fuck it.

That’s what they all expected from you anyways.

However, you were met with only silence for a while.

“Hey,” the last person you wanted to hear from says quietly. “I uhh—I got this number from your friend.” you hear him swallowing thickly, making you frown.

Did he fucking threaten them? You should be getting mad, but all you can feel is nothing.

“I’ve—...It’s been a while since you, uh...” you hear him curse under his breath as he trailed off, “It’s been two weeks. Your friend, uh, Taylor? Told me you’re not feeling well and—”

“What do you want from me?” you snap, hearing your voice sounding rough, from prolonged dehydration if you had to guess. You wanted to reply with some snarky comment, something to taunt him, but you didn’t have energy. You couldn’t care less anyways.

Nothing fucking matters.

After a moment of hesitation, Shigaraki almost whispered.

“Come back to school.”

“Alright, fuck off.” you reply, raising your phone to your face and almost ending the call if not for the bright fucking screen blinding you for a second.

“I deleted them.” he said, attempting to keep you from hanging up.

It worked.

“Huh?”

“I removed the thread. It doesn’t exist anymore. Anywhere. At all.”

For a moment, you think about it, realizing you’re supposed to feel some sort of relief—but all you felt was nothing.

“Why.” you say, not ask. You don’t understand, why would he go through the trouble?

Thinking is really hard right now.

“Come to school and we’ll talk. Have you eaten yet?” you think you hear concern in his voice, but you know better, so you scoff.

It took you a while to reply, but he didn’t press you the way he always did.

He just… waited.

“...No.”

“Do you…” he mumbles, hesitating again. “Do you wanna grab a bite with me? I’ll—I’ll pay.” he hurried to get it out before you shut him down.

“Shigaraki.”

“Yeah?”

“Why the fuck would I go anywhere with you?”

“If you let me take you out once, you’ll find out.” he promises.

A promise that you didn’t care for him to fulfill.

You huffed and shuffled around and weren’t about to make this easy for him, he knew.

He knew you never will, but he’s nothing if not ambitious.

“We’re not friends.” you bite, “We’re not even on friendly terms. I was an asshole to you, I fucked with you and you got to ruin my life in return. The end.” you asserted, going over the list with him. “How stupid do you think I am? Even if you did get rid of the thread now, everyone fucking saw everything, they could have saved it, the damage is—”

“Done, I know. I…”

You rolled your eyes, almost cutting him off again, but still waited to hear what he had to say—which was fucking nothing apparently, because he ended up only cursing and sighing.

It wasn’t hard to figure out how someone could end up as fucked up as he was.

If life managed to fuck you up and help you become as dysfunctional as you were right now, you can’t imagine the damage it takes for a person to grow into someone like him.

Rich people are weird, but they’re also cowards. They don’t stand out like he does, they mostly keep to themselves—keep the dirt in the family, behind closed doors.

Yet Shigaraki seemed to only seek destruction in his path.

Either he was born a natural psychopath and his parents don’t fucking care about him or…they too were insane pieces of shit—

You blink. Why on earth would you rationalize his fucking behaviour?! God knows you didn’t go to therapy for so long only for you to fall back into bad habits.

He hurt you. He is the bad guy.

But by that standard, so were you, if you counted the times you’ve fucked up in your life, until you were lucky to know better. Regardless of what your therapist would tell you.

Besides, you’ve been through much worse than what he’s shown you so far.

You’ll probably spend the rest of your life regretting your following words.

“Where…did you wanna meet?”

His ears perked up at that, phone slipping from his hands and crashing on the floor. You heard muffled curses and a hasty reply.

“Fuck, really?! You’ll come?”

If you’re honest, you don’t think you’ve ever heard him sound positively excited—save for whenever he caught you suffering—but then again, you don’t really know him at all.

The reason you’re even willing to take him up on his offer, as stupid as it was, is the same self-destructive reason you would’ve hooked up with any residual college creep you expected to call you earlier.

Because you deeply, deeply needed to sabotage yourself.

“Keep asking, and I might change my mind. I gotta shower first and—oh,” is the last thing he hears before you trip and—thud—face plant. “Fuck.” you said softly, closing your eyes.

You didn’t really eat or drink anything lately, which was probably why you felt your consciousness slowly slipping away.

“Hey—okay?—llo?”

His panicked raspy voice is the last thing you hear before you’re completely out of it.

You hope it was for good this time. ─────────

The first sign that you’re unfortunately still very much alive, is that you don’t feel the promised nothingness. The forever inexistence you hoped to achieve after your oh-so-tragic passing. Where would they bury you, anyways?

Instead, the first sound that your brain registers is a loud pounding in the distance.

Followed by people yelling.

Feeling your mind slowly booting up, you attempt to get up.

Instead of succeeding though, you slip and fall again, groaning audibly. Around the third attempt, you finally get to your feet.

Miserable and clutching your empty, hurting stomach, you slowly walk towards the source of the obnoxious pounding, feeling an awful lot of deja vu.

“Fuck off! This is your fucking fault—” you hear and immediately recognize your best friend’s voice arguing with…?

“Get off my fucking case. If you would’ve checked up on her we wouldn't even be here, you dumb—”

Ah, of course he’d be here too. How is it that he’s anywhere and everywhere, all at once—from the moment you fall asleep to the moment you wake, incessantly haunting you like a goddamn fucking ghost.

“Shut the fuck UP, you creep! Don’t get me STARTED, you insane piece of shit, do you even know what she even went through when you—”

Being fed up with the noise, you open the door to the commotion, interrupting their argument as both of the loud idiots snap their heads towards the woman of the hour.

“I have fucking neighbors too, you know?”

They both stared at you as if you became the eighth wonder of the world, prompting you to arch a brow.

“Well, you look like shit.” Shigaraki breaks the tension.

Both you and your friend glare daggers at him.

“What?” he mumbles, looking away, his hand habitually reaching to scratch his neck. “It’s true.”

Rolling your eyes while Taylor was gearing up to say something back, you open your door for them to come in.

“Do not talk shit about the mess,” you say, kicking random things out of your way. “I don’t have a couch, sit wherever you want, or don’t. I don’t care.”

You trip right after saying that, but Shigaraki is quick to grab you by your waist, making you stiffen up and immediately shove him off.

“Do not fucking touch me.” you hiss, and he huffs in response, frowning.

Normally, you know he wouldn’t let that slide, but something weird is going on with him and you don’t have the willpower or energy to unpack his nice guy behavior from today.

Taylor was knocking shit over, opening and closing what seemed like every fucking drawer and cupboard of your two by two kitchen, trying to find something—anything—that was edible in your pantry.

“I’m fine, you really didn’t have to come over. Especially not you.” you glare at Shigaraki and say it like you weren’t starving to death and were ready to be put in a coffin if they hadn’t shown up.

“Like hell you are!” your friend replies sharply, not bothering to spare you a second look in their quest for finding food.

Your eyes landed on him again, noticing his head hanging low and the mop of white hair messily covering his face as he furiously scratched at his neck, drawing blood from the sensitive skin. You couldn’t see his expression save for a glimpse of red, and honestly didn’t really care to.

“Yuck, stop that.” you swat his hand away.

Shigaraki finally meets your eyes and you notice dark eyebags. He looked worse than he normally did, and that’s saying something. He was so confident and full of himself usually, so much so, that this weird uncertainty looked out of place on his face. What made him so uneasy?

“What?” you spit.

He doesn’t reply, instead he grunts and looks away. The fuck is his problem?

“Okay! So!” Taylor makes their way over with a glass of cold water and hands it to you. “You have absolutely fucking nothing to eat in this dump you call home. Incredible news, I know.” they rolled their eyes and placed their hands on their hips while you immediately started chugging the glass down. Who knew water could taste so refreshing?

“Shigaraki, be a big boy and go to the convenience store ‘round the corner to buy a few things while I help this bitch clean up. Don’t buy anything too heavy on the stomach, ‘cos she hasn’t eaten in a while, isn’t that right sweetheart?”

Oh, you just noticed. They were mad. But that would come later, when you’re stable enough to take an honest-to-god beating from them.

“Wha—Why the fuck would I go?” he growls at Taylor irritatedly, but is only met with a smug look.

“Ok then, I’ll go! Are you going to stay here, take her clothes off and help her take a shower? Scrub her clean for me, babe? Can’t you see she can barely fucking stand?” Taylor shot him a look.

“Hey! I’m not a fucking kid!” you say but they both ignored you.

Shigaraki’s eyes widen and a bright red flush spreads on his pale features.

“That’s what I thought.” Taylor snorts.

You can’t help but stare at him incredulously. Was he seriously flustered at the mere prospect of you taking your clothes off? He’s literally seen god knows how much disgusting footage of you naked or fucking somebody. Not only that but he also posted said footage online for everyone to jerk off to.

Is this the same guy who pinned you against the wall in a public hallway, telling you how undeserving of his cock you were, because you were a little mean to him? The train of thought filled you with newfound anger, but before you could snap at Taylor for even daring to suggest such a thing instead of kicking him out, they spoke first.

“I know I took you with me on a whim,” your friend begins, referring to the only black fucking sheep in the room, “But I really don’t trust you after all the bullshit. Hooooonestly… I’m still waiting for her to snap at me for showing you where she lives. She’s about to use the last three percent of her energy to try to kill me, so you better go now. It’s the least you can do for her, emo boy.” Taylor says, bracing themselves and it finally clicks.

Oh.

Oh, right.

“Seriously?! What the FUCK were you thinking?” you shout at them.

You know your friend was careless, but letting Shigaraki have more access to ways of fucking you over was pushing it.

“Wait, wait, wait! I can explain!” were Taylor’s famous last words, as you deliriously started hauling any object or piece of trash you could at them.

Tomura glanced at you a final time, before quietly slipping past the both of you and out of the noisy apartment.

Your friend wasn’t lying to you, they really did only take him with them on a whim.

In fact, they had a whole ass mental breakdown when he texted them about what happened. Shigaraki didn’t really understand why they let him see you after all that he’s done, figuring they must be really fucking dumb and a horrible friend.

He wasn’t about to complain, though.

This was a golden opportunity for him to learn what made you tick and how to break you just enough to build you up again for him—without risking you killing yourself in the process.

He needed to be very careful in the future, unlike today where he almost fucked up, underestimating just how fragile your will to live was.

He’d make you want to live, he told himself as he was walking down the stairs of your building. He’s gotten this far—and after all, there was no end boss he couldn’t beat before.

Little did you know, the past few weeks had been rough for him too.

Not that you’d ever find out—or care. ───────── The bell rang and he was still standing in the hallway where you left him, looking off in the distance and hoping to materialize you again out of thin air.

Scratch, scratch, scratch.

His neck was unbearably itchy at the thought of you rejecting him again. At the thought of himself messing up. He never messes up. It didn’t make sense.

He shouldn’t care about you.

You were nothing to him before.

From the moment he saw you in the convenience store, he thought you were a major fucking pain in the ass.

The way you stared at him in disgust—the way everyone fucking stared at him—like he was some piece of garbage to be thrown out, made him want to strangle you until he saw the light leaving your eyes. You thought you were so fucking cool, talking back to him when you had no clue who he was or what he was capable of.

Absolutely fucking clueless.

Amusement twinkled in his eyes at your harmless retorts, the best part being that you managed to fuck up in front of him seconds later. What a mess you were.

Like him.

Shigaraki couldn’t help but giggle at your clumsiness.

What an idiot, forgetting your wallet right after you bared your teeth at him. Did you need someone to save you? That’s alright, he can treat you this time. He likes it when people owe him after all. It allowed him to own them.

He didn’t wanna believe his luck when he immediately spots you in class the next day, sitting in his favorite seat. Things couldn’t be more perfect, his new favorite little bitch was going to the same university as him, sharing his classes.

He couldn’t have found a more convenient toy to break if he tried.

“Hey, sponger.” he hits you with a grin from between his dry lips.

Shigaraki could see your brows pinching in surprise.

He very soon found out that he took great pleasure in making you squirm for him. It was funny seeing you getting frustrated over him sitting next to you in class. The same guy who humiliated you one day prior. He fucking reveled in that look.

“Why– ” you start, fidgeting with the hem of your shirt. He watched you gather your thoughts before you spoke again. “How did you even recognize me?”

Your irritation sounded so, so sweet to his ears. Not even the professor walking in could hold him back from messing with you. He leaned into you and whispered, noticing you visibly shuddering at that.

“I’d recognize an ugly skank like you virtually anywhere, rest assured, idiot.” he said, making sure to verbally underline the insult way longer than it was necessary.

Shigaraki watched your reaction, hoping you’d bite back so he could push, push, push. You were so much fun and he’s just met you.

Generally people—especially women—avoided him like the fucking plague.

He wasn’t stupid, he knew what he looked like, his status and horrible personality doing nothing to help him either, save for a few crazies that got off on his violent nature and the hookers his Master occasionally books and insists he should indulge in, despite him turning them down every time.

People were generally afraid of him, but as much as people disliked him, they usually hid it well most of the time, not wanting to become part of his famous track record—to give him a reason to retaliate.

You, however, openly displayed your disgust. You didn’t hide it. You wore it on your sleeve. You weren’t afraid to be found out, in fact you wanted to make sure he heard you.

And he did hear you, crystal fucking clear. Only, he didn’t expect you to be so… Well, you.

Leaning into him yourself, if not a little more aggressively in comparison to his own gesture, you proceed to trap him in his own seat, arm reaching around the back, but deliberately not touching him.

You didn’t touch him but he could feel you. He could feel the warmth radiating from your body, being so close to him. People never got close to him unless he wanted them to, but you fucking dare. His breath hitched.

“I’d hold up a mirror, so you can finally get to see your own dusty ass, but you’d have to buy that for me too, jackass.” you had said, practically spitting in his face. Turns out you coincidentally also didn’t give a fuck about the professor.

Tomura’s eyes widen in the process and he backs off, scratching his neck somewhat disturbingly. Fuck, that was unexpected and you were so fucking cute. It took him a second to compose himself, because your bratty little comeback comment went straight to his cock.

That means, if I play this right—

He finally turned to you again and opened his mouth…

“If you don’t kill the stupid goblin at the beginning of the stage, the final boss won’t carry your S-Grade.” he casually states, pointing at your screen.

Once again, he marveled at how fucking lucky he was. You were playing one of his favorite MMOs–good pick, by the way—allowing him to latch onto that topic like a lifeline. He had to hurry and quickly get on your good side.

Before you found out who he really was and all the half-truths reached your ears too, his notorious reputation ruining everything for him.

“Huh?” you blink.

He found your confused face endearing, but you wouldn’t know that yet. Not until you properly became his.

“Tsk, your game, dumbass. You’ve probably been grinding for hours, only getting it once or twice because you never think to kill the stupid goblin, and only ever do it by accident.” he shrugged. “No one ever does, so they don’t find the pattern without looking up a guide.”

He didn’t expect you to be so obedient already, but you seemed to be either really fucking clueless or incredibly confident, because you actually took him up on his advice, and while you were busy trying out the new acquired strategy, he took his time to really observe you.

Tomura leaned in closer and couldn’t believe how oblivious you could be.

You seemed to dislike him so much, but you let him get close to you? So close that he could easily inhale the nice scent of your shampoo, and because your hair looked so inviting, he wanted to run his fingers through it.

To grip it hard and make your pretty head bob up and down his—

“Ugh!” you slammed your fist on the desk, earning you a few looks. Luckily for him, you didn’t give a fuck.

Close, too close.

His hand was hanging in the air, just behind your head—almost touching you. He quickly retracted it and resumed to just observing you.

How many silly dates would it take you to let him drag you into his apartment? He glanced at your neck. What would you sound like if he marked you? If he covered your body with so many bruises and hickeys until everyone knew you were his? What was your favorite co-op game? Would you sit in his lap when you played together? Would he be able to get you to cockwarm him while you were playing? What was your favorite take-out dinner? Your movie? Do you have siblings? How many lovers have you had? Would he be your first, like you would be his? Would you enjoy being speared on his dick, where you belonged? Would you take him, like the good girl he knows you’ll be? He wasn’t stupid, he knew he’d have to tame you somehow, but you’ll understand. You’ll become his favorite plaything.

Tomura’s thoughts were spiraling uncontrollably and he felt that couldn’t wait. Especially when his cock was so fucking hard and straining against the fabric of his jeans, that it almost hurt.

If only he could skip the boring dialogue and get to the fucking cutscene.

During the little time where his head wasn’t filled with thoughts of bending you over the desk and pounding your pussy in front of the whole class to see, he found out he actually enjoyed something as boring as watching you play.

You were surprisingly decent. Better than Spinner at least. The gear that you were wearing consisted of only legendary sets, ones he’d even use himself—if only with a few modifications to the stats. The kind of gear that, if you were lucky, only dropped from bosses that spawn once a month.

By the time you’d finished your second run, an idea formed in his head.

“Told you so.” he says matter-of-factly, without even a hint of smugness in his voice.

You scoffed at him and rolled your eyes.

It’s alright, he thought. People often got annoyed at him when he was right. You’ll come around, and even if you didn’t, you’d still be fun to debate with, he could tell. You looked so fuckable when you were pouting like a brat, too. It made him want to see you cry.

“Don’t look so pissy, it took me like a week to figure it out and it really drove me insane,” he says, thinking back fondly to all the controllers he managed to break. “I’m usually pretty good at these types of tells in games, but the design of this one made no fucking sense.“

He glances at your game thoughtfully, not catching on, on the fact that it was him that pissed you off, not the game itself. “What's your IGN? We can co-op and raid together.”

It was a great idea, actually.

Partaking in one of his favorite hobbies and getting to know you better would be peak. Two birds with one stone. He’d take it slow, then he’d sweep you off your feet, impressing you with his gaming abilities, knocking your pride down a peg or two. You’d learn to like him too, he resolved.

He’s not all that bad if you left out—a lot of things.

“Sorry?”

You looked at him as if he grew another head.

Huh? What’s wrong? He felt his body starting to itch again.

Why the fuck were you looking at him like that?

You were supposed to want to get to know him too, weren’t you?

But the bell rings before he can say anything to you, and you scurry off, his eyes never leaving your figure until you are out of his sight.

Tomura was now scratching his neck furiously, drawing blood and reopening recently closed wounds, glaring at anyone who dared to so much as look at him in this moment.

He was wrong about you. How could he be wrong? He was never wrong.

But he was. You were exactly like the rest of them.

Stupid bitch.

It’s fine.

He’d find a way to teach you a lesson. ───────── The inside of the convenience store was dimly lit in comparison to the first time he’d met you on his errands, a soft fluorescent glow trying its best to light the store up instead of the bright neon lights that blinded him that day.

The air smelled like a blend of dirty mop water and tobacco, combining into a disgusting but familiar musty scent. Behind the counter wasn’t the usual cashier dude, but an old lady smoking inside the establishment. Tomura scoffed and figured it must’ve been the owner, unable to otherwise explain the audacity.

Fidgeting, he looked around the aisles at various food objects. Would instant noodles count as ‘easy on your stomach’? He’s never really had to care for anyone before, and he’s always had Kurogiri when it came to being cared for.

He shook his head, scrunching his nose and kept searching. It took him about two minutes of googling and another three of pacing around the aisles, his eyes lighting up the moment he finally spotted the canned article in question.

Unbeknownst to him, it was one of your favorite comfort foods.

Chicken soup.

[wednesdaymunson]

Head Over Heels

Baby Daddy! Eddie x Fem!reader

Summary: Part 2 to my Baby Daddy! Eddie fic.Slight time jump. Eddie has half assed professed his love for you, but neither of you can bring it up. You're still seeing Keanu. Wayne makes an appearance and scolds Eddie. Eddie is a lil toxic at the end.

Warnings: smut,angst,unprotected sex, creampie, drunk sex(f), mention of oral sex(m receiving)..I think that's it.

A/n: I wrote and rewrote this several times. I'm kinda okay with this version. The ending is opened to the possibility of a third part, or you can make up with what happens in the end ¯\_(ツ)_/¯

I Was Made For Lovin' You - part 1

Mine(Interlude)

Word Count: 4,609k

It had been about a month since Eddie left that message. The both of you would always tiptoe around it. You were never direct when trying to ask, and Eddie would avoid it anyway he could. You were afraid to be forward, possibly hearing something you didn't want to know, but it was killing you not knowing 'Why now?'.

You've been on a few low-profile dates with Keanu. He didn't want to alert the paparazzi and drag you into the crazy spotlight. Even with Eddie's fame with Corroded Coffin, you were very much in the background, unnoticed. You weren't even thinking about that, you just wanted to live in the moment. Keanu made you feel seen and heard. He calmed your mind, you knew where you stood with him. 

You made it home just in time. Eddie was dropping off Evelyn at 9am and here it is 8:45. You change into your pjs, wash whatever makeup was left off your face, to turn around and see Eddie behind you. 

"For fuck sakes, Eddie! You scared this shit outta me!... how'd you get in?"

"Well, hello to you too! Look, your door wasn't shut all the way. I got nervous, so I came in preparing to bash some skulls or preparing for the worst.."

You could tell by his tone and his eyes that he was genuine. You hugged him before you even realized it. He tightly hugged you back, and you melted into him. 

"Wait.. where's Evelyn?!"

"Oh! I told her to stay in the car and if someone tried to get her, to hit them with the crowbar I keep in the car." He boldly stated. 

"Eddie, you left a 4 year old in the car with a crowbar? Please go get our daughter." You sigh. 

"On it, sweetheart."

You pinch at his side. 

"Y/N, don't start that." Eddie laughs. 

As soon as Eddie is out of sight, you shut the door and quietly break down. You haven't told Eddie about you seeing someone else. You've been pretty good at keeping it under wraps. You think to yourself, 'Keanu and I aren't exclusive. I'm allowed to date and do whatever, I'm single! Eddie doesn't have to know. I don't know what he does when he's away or when he's not here.'

You splash some water on your face, dry off, and compose yourself. You hear Evelyn knocking on your door. 

"Mommy, open the door! There's no bad guys! It's me, Evelyn Starchild Munson!"

You greeted her as you opened the door. 

"Hi baby! I missed you." You smiled. 

Eddie's eyes met yours, and he could tell you had been crying, but he didn't want to mention it in front of Evelyn, and he also had some business to take care of. 

"Y/N, I have to get going, but I'll call you later. Evelyn, be good for mommy. I'll see you soon, baby. I love you."

Eddie rushes out the door. 

It's almost midnight, Evelyn was tucked away in her bed after a day full of arts and crafts, a melt down because you told her she couldn't get in the oven, and a chicken nugget dinner by the pool. You're drifting off, and your phone begins to ring. 

"Hello?" You answer soothingly. 

"Fuck, I'm sorry. I didn't mean to wake you."

It was Eddie on the other end. Usually, you would be bothered by the late call, but you didn't have the energy tonight. 

"Mm 's okay, Eddie. What did you need to talk about?"

"I'm sorry for calling you this late, just got caught up with stuff at the studio. But I wanted to tell you I'm flying Wayne here in two weeks and wanted to ask if you would have dinner with us. I know he would love to see you and I know you would too."

You haven't seen Wayne since Evelyn's first birthday. He was very much like a father to you. You started calling him "Dad" after it slipped out one day when he asked you to run to the store for him, and it stuck ever since.  He taught you a lot, especially some skills, so you would never have to rely on a man to help when Eddie wasn't around. You haven't spoken to him much since the split, and you did miss him dearly. 

"No worries. Oh, that's nice. Umm yeah, just let me know what day and what you have planned."

"Great! I'm actually hoping to get the old man to consider moving here. He's retiring soon and I think he'd be better off with family around."

"Oooohh…you sure about that? You know how Wayne is." You giggled. 

"I know, I know. Maybe you can sweeten the deal."

"Eddie, I want no part in your shenanigans,buuuuut I do miss him. Evelyn should have her granddad around."

"I knew you'd see it my way."

There's a small silence, and you hear Eddie sigh. 

"Everything okay with you? You looked like you were crying earlier today."

"Yeah, I just got soap in my eyes. Burned like a bitch." You quickly replied. 

"Hmm okay… I just wanted to make sure."

You could tell he didn't really believe you, but he wasn't going to push. 

"Oh, one more thing…what are you wearing?"

"Ugh, goodnight, Eddie."

"Hey, I tried. Goodnight, Y/N."

"Y/N, I know it's only been a few days, but I really do miss you. I can't wait to see you when I get back from New York." Keanu cooed into the phone. 

"I miss you too. How's New York?"

"It's great! There's tons of places I'd love to take you. Oh! I didn't get a chance to tell you, but the rest of the band is here in New York, and we're doing a few secret shows while I'm here!" He exclaimed. 

"Oh, that sounds fun! I'm kinda jealous of the people who get to see Dogstar live." You frowned. 

"Well, maybe I can talk to the band and set up a show when I get home."

"That would be awesome! But you don't have to do that, Keanu."

"I know, but I would definitely do it for you, beautiful."

"You're too sweet."

"Y/N, you know what else I miss?"

"Hmm? What's that?"

"I miss your plump lips wrapped around my hard cock while you look up at me with those big beautiful eyes. I'm sorry if that was brazen of me, but jesus christ Y/N! Any time I think about you, that's one of the things that come across my mind. And you get so wet for me while you do it." Keanu breathes heavily. 

"I enjoy it, and if I can be honest, I like being in control sometimes, and in those moments, I'm very much in control, aren't I?"

"Mm, yes, you are, sweetheart. I'm practically puddy in your hands when I'm in your mouth. Fuck! I can't wait to see you when I get home, I'm going to tear into you!"

"I can't wait either. I.."

"MOMMY!"

"I'm sorry, but I have to cut our conversation short. Evelyn just woke up."

"No worries. I'll call you when I get some free time. I hope you have a good day,  gorgeous. Bye."

"Thank you, you too. Talk to you later."

You lay in bed for a few more minutes to gather yourself. You get up to check on Evelyn, ready to start your day super early. You find her back asleep, arms spread out, one leg hanging off the bed. 

"Oh, my wild child. Just like your dad."

You gently put her leg back in the bed and cover her up. You think about calling Eddie on the walk back to your room, but it's around 5:30 am, and you're sure he's passed out by now. You open your closet and pull out a box. It was a box that was a mixture of sex toys, lubes, a Polaroid camera, and a velvet bag that held a pair of handcuffs. You opened it and pulled them out, the biggest smile flashed across your face. 

It was your first week in Hawkins and your parents moved you and your younger siblings there after your graduation. You saw a flyer on the side of the building for a band playing at the Hideout. 'Corroded Coffin? Hmm might as well. It'll give me something to do in this boring town.'  You thought. That night you met Eddie. Somehow you'd catch him staring at you and then quickly turn his head. You were in the crowd when his band played and you did enjoy the music. After the set you went to the bar and got some water before heading home. 

"Who celebrates with water?"

Eddie stands next to you at the bar. 

"Well, I'm not celebrating anything…should I be?" You laughed. 

"Is this not your first Corroded Coffin show? I've never seen you at any of our shows, and trust me, I would notice and remember a pretty face in the crowd." Eddie smiled. 

"You're correct. This is my first time here and seeing your band. I just moved here a week ago with my family."

"So come celebrate with me and my band. I can make sure you get home safely."

"Oh yeah? I'm not sure about that. You may try to keep me handcuffed in a basement." You giggled while hooking your finger on the handcuffs he was wearing attached to his belt.

"Oh! No! I would never do that! Do I come off like that type of guy?!"

"No, you don't come off like that. I was joking…maybe. " You could barely control your laughter. 

"I'm Y/N, by the way." As you extended your hand. 

"Eddie, amongst other colorful names the town has given me."

He takes your hand in both his, feeling the cold sensation of his rings against your warm skin. 

"Nice to meet you, Y/N. Soooo are you gonna stay?"

"Sorry, I really gotta go. See ya around." You smiled and made your way to leave. 

"HEY! HOW DO I GET A HOLD OF YOU?!" Eddie shouted.

"COME FIND ME!" You shouted back. 

Eddie just happened to run into you at Starcourt Mall, got your number, and eventually asked you out on a date. He was very polite, a great listener, and made you laugh any chance he got. You both shared secrets that you swore each of you would take your graves, insecurities, and dreams. You two were inseparable. 

You take the bag, put everything away and put it in another box full of things that you weren't ready to get rid of. You decide to try to get a little bit of sleep before Evelyn wakes up. Your eyes close and you feel a slight dip in the bed, a small arm wraps around your stomach.

"Mommy, can I have waffles and bacon, please?"

"Of course, baby. Coming right up." You giggled. 

"There's my girls!" Wayne exclaimed.

"GRANDPAAAA!" Evelyn yells, running. 

"Hi Wayne. It's been too long." You smiled

You spent the whole evening laughing and having fun. It felt like old times. You took some pictures and set up the camera and got a "family" shot. Evelyn was getting sleepy, so you offered to put her to bed. 

"You ready to go to bed, love bug? 

"Uh huh. Mommy, are you going to spend the night too?"

There was an awkward silence through Eddie's penthouse. 

"Oh no, baby. I'm going home to sleep in my bed. Grandpa Wayne is staying here for a few days, so he'll sleep in the guest room, you have your room, and Daddy has his." You explained. 

"Can't you share a bed with Daddy? Like other mommies and daddies?"

You nervously looked at Eddie and mouthed "help me" to him. 

"Uh,sweetheart, some mommies and daddies don't like to share beds with one another. "

"Okay. Mommy, can you read me a story please?"

"Of course." You smile and follow Evelyn to her room. 

"Boy, you should have done right by her. I don't know what got into you when you signed that deal and went on tour. That girl was head over heels for you, and I knew that the first night you brought her over. Eddie, I love you, but I'd be lying if I said I didn't want to kick your ass. You lost a good one."

"You think I don't know that?? When I left the house that morning after she kicked me out, I thought I would be fine. Off to the next one, then the next, and so on and so forth. I found myself comparing every woman to her! I tried to stop, but it never failed. 'Y/N would have handled that differently. Y/N makes this better.' Sometimes I can't sleep knowing I destroyed my family and hurt her. She didn't deserve that, I didn't deserve her. I want to make things right, Wayne."

"Son, I'd be surprised if there weren't about a hundred men trying to break down her door for a chance. She's not like these Hollywood girls. She's a genuine and caring person. You better act quickly before someone beats you to it." Wayne huffed.

You walk back into the living room. 

"I gotta go. I promised Luna I'd have a few drinks with her before I go home, and my taxi should be here soon."

"Well, sweetheart, it was good to see you. I hope I see you a few more times while I'm visiting." Wayne said as he hugged you. 

"It was good seeing you too, Dad. Ya know you should move here when you retire. I'd love for you to see Evelyn more. She needs her granddad around."

"Did Eddie put you up to this??"

"Oh, no!" You smiled and winked at Eddie. 

"Wayne, just think about it." Eddie stated. 

"Fine, I'll think about it."

"My taxi is here. Thanks for dinner, Eddie. Goodnight."

"Maybe you're meant to be together? You really need to talk to him, or you can ignore it, move on with Keanu, and keep second guessing yourself. "

Not only was Luna your babysitter, but she was your best and pretty much only friend out here. She helped pick up the pieces after you kicked Eddie out. She was pretty protective of you. She kept you from making rash decisions in the wake of your breakup that would have landed you on the front cover of the tabloids. But what you didn't know is that she was also a listening ear for Eddie, and she knew how he felt about you. Fortunately, she was a good friend to you both and was unbiased in this situation. She gave you advice when asked, nothing more and nothing less. 

"Luna, I just don't want to go through it again. I can't let a man tell me twice that he doesn't want me."

"Did he ever say he didn't want you? He cheated, I get it. Some people like to have their cake and eat it too. There was nothing wrong with you then. There's nothing wrong with you now."

"I know." You frowned. 

"Y/N, I gotta get going. I have a nanny gig in the morning. I'll call you tomorrow, yeah?" Luna grabbed your hand and squeezed  it as she smiled. 

You stayed and had a few more drinks, and the liquid courage was flowing through your blood. You asked the bartender for the phone. It took you a few drunken tries to dial Eddie's number correctly, but you finally got it. 

"Hello?"

"EDDIE! IT'S ME!"

"Y/N?"

"YESSSSSS! YOU ARE CORRECT, SIR!" You drunkenly yell through the phone. 

"Why are you yelling? Are you drunk??" Eddie questioned. 

"I'm sorry, Eddie." You whispered. 

"Y/N, just try to speak in a normal volume. Are you okay? Where are you?"

"Yes, maybe…I don't know. I'm at Sunset Bar."

"Okay, I'll be there in a few minutes. I'll tell Wayne to keep an eye on Evelyn."

Eddie finds you at the bar nursing a glass of water.  He thanks the bartender for keeping an eye on you. 

"You lush." Eddie chuckled as he grabbed you by the waist. 

"Let's get you home, Princess."

"Thank you, Eddie. Will you make a fluffernutter when we get home?" You murmured. 

"Anything for you." Eddie smiled. 

You sat in the seat and stared at Eddie. You admired his profile. He had his hair pulled back into a ponytail with a few strands of his wavy hair in his face, and he had a fresh undercut. The way the corners of his eyes crinkled when he smiled. When he belted out the words to his favorite songs, the veins in his neck would bulge. You could feel the wetness pooling in your panties. You reached over and lightly scratched the back of his head, feeling the prickly hairs on the tip of your fingers. 

"Mm, that feels really good."

"I bet it does. You know what else would feel really good?"

"Hmm?" Eddie hummed as he gave you a side glance with a raised eyebrow. 

"Your fat cock deep inside me."

Eddie's ring clad hands gripped the wheel tightly, his knuckles whiting. 

"Fuck, Princess are you sure? You've been drinking. I don't think we should."

"I'm a little drunk, yes, but I know exactly what I want, Sir." You grinned. 

"Y/N, you don't even know what that does to me. Thank god we're almost home."

Eddie ups the speed a little, making it to the gate, pushing the access button repeatedly, trying to get it open as quickly as possible. You start to unbutton the top of your dress as Eddie pulls up to your house and places the car in park. You take off your seat belt and press the release button on Eddie's. You're straddling him before he knows it, his bulge pressed against your warm, wet core. 

"Sweetheart, you couldn't wait until we got inside?"

"No, Eddie. I need you inside me now! I need to feel you. I need to feel something other than these god damn conflicting feelings I have for you! Please, I'm begging you." You pouted.

You left Eddie speechless. All he could do at this moment was to grab your face and kiss you. Your lips pressed against his hard, tongues rolling over each other.  He breaks away, grabbing you by the back of your neck, he licks the side of your neck and reaches your ear. 

"You're so fucking needy, I love it when you beg." He growled. 

Eddie pulls on the handle to lean his seat back. He reaches up your dress to find your panties. 

"Oh, baby, I hope these aren't your favorite panties." Eddie grinned.

He pulls out his switchblade and cuts your panties off you and tosses them in the passenger seat—You haven't seen Eddie like this in a very long time. Sure you'd let him paddle you every so often and do a little dom/sub play, but he was always so soft spoken and well mannered ever since you decided to start hooking up,b afraid of fucking things up more. He unbuckled his belt and undid his pants, releasing his hard member,  pre cum already forming at the tip. You firmly grab it to line up to your soaking wet entrance. 

"Wait, I don't have any condoms. Did you bring any?"

"No, I didn't. I'm out, and right now, I really don't care. Just don't cum in me."

You gasp as you sink down on Eddie's thick cock. You feel a pleasurable burn as he stretches you out. He grabs on to your hips as you start riding him. 

"Fuck, your so wet for me, Princess. All that for me?" Eddie breathes haggardly.

"Mm, yes, it's all for you, Eds. Your dick.. f-f-feels so fucking good!"

"I've missed being inside you, your tight pussy gripping around my cock. Fuck, if you keep riding me like this, I don't know how long I'll last, Princess."

You love it when he calls you "Princess", it sparks the fire growing in your stomach.  Eddie's thumb finds your swollen clit and rubs it with a little bit of pressure. Your breath starts to hitch. 

"There it is. I know you're close, sweetheart. I want you to cum for me, cream all over my dick."

With your hands on Eddie's chest, you lean slightly forward, your hips roll desperately to reach your orgasm. Eddie frantically runs circles on your throbbing clit.  

"FFFUUUUCCCKK!" You yell as you dissolve into pleasure. 

You keep riding Eddie while you ride out your orgasm.

"Princess, I-I'm.. you gotta get off, or I'm gonna bust in you!"

You're already chasing your second orgasm.

"Mmm Eds, I-I-I can't stop! I'm cumming again!" You panted. 

Eddie holds you down by your hips as you both reach climax. He spills himself into you, covering your pulsing walls, clenching around him, milking every last bit of him. 

You fall on to his chest, trying to catch your breath. 

"Eddie…I-I love you." You breathed. 

"I love you too, Princess." He huffed. 

"Y/N, as much as I love being in this, uh situation with you, I think we should go into the house and get cleaned up."

"Yeah, you're right." You giggled. 

You're both laying in bed after your shower together, your head resting on his chest.

"I love you, Y/N. I'm sorry that I hurt you. I wish I could take everything back." Eddie whispered into your hair. 

"Then why did you do it? I know I'm not pretty like the groupies on tour or the women out here. Why wasn't I enough for you?" Your voice trembled.

"You're gorgeous, Y/N. You were when we first met, and you'll always be. You were enough. I was just a scared little boy. Everything happened so fast, getting signed, Evelyn, moving to California…I just didn't know how to handle it all, and I didn't know how to tell you."

You sat up to look Eddie in the eyes. 

"Eddie, look at me. You could have told me anything. We've shared so many secrets that we knew each other inside and out. Whatever the world threw at us, we were in it together." You cried. 

Eddie held you in his arms. 

"Shh, I know. I fucked up. I'm sorry Y/N. I'll do better…if you let me try."

"I..I don't know, Eddie." You sniffled.

You eventually fell asleep in his arms. Only to wake up in an empty bed. You roll out of bed and make your way to the kitchen. Eddie is sitting at the table having a cup of coffee. There was a lull in the air. 

"Good morning, Eds." You smiled. 

"So when were you going to tell me that you've been seeing someone else? Keanu fucking Reeves of all people!"

"We're not that serious. We're not exclusive. And why does it matter who I'm seeing or if I'm seeing anyone? You're the last person who should be concerned about my dating life." You snapped. 

"Well he sounded pretty fucking serious in the message he left this morning!" Eddie bellowed.

"Does he know about us?"

"He knows what you put me through."

"So he doesn't know that you call me over here to fuck you senseless when you want to get off?.... Are you fucking him?"

"What? That's none of your god damn business, Eddie. I'm single, I can do as I please. YOU! YOU CHOSE THIS FOR ME WHEN YOU DECIDED TO FUCK EVERY BITCH FROM HERE TO THE EAST COAST AND LIE TO ME UNTIL ONE OF THEM HAD THE GUTS TO TELL ME THE TRUTH!" You sobbed. 

"Fuck, Eds. I love you, but how do I know you won't cheat on me again? I would look so fucking stupid for trusting you with my heart again."

"... Why him?"

" I dunno, he's nice. He makes me feel seen and heard. I know where I stand with him. He knows I have responsibilities, and he supports me pursuing my passion in art. If it wasn't him, Eds, I'm sure it would have been one of the plethora of guys that came around after we broke up. I didn't realize people knew who I was, but obviously, others were paying attention to me."

You could see that Eddie was disappointed in himself. His eyes were darting back and forth. He seemed like he was analyzing an invisible piece of code on the table.

"Let's get married!" Eddie blurted. 

"Eddie, you can't do that to me! This isn't going to magically solve any of this."

"You love me, right? And I love you. Let's do this!"

"Eds, it's going to take a lot for us to even get to the idea of marriage. Maybe…we should stop having sex…take a break…just strictly co parent."

By this time, Eddie has already standing next to you at the counter, arms folded. 

"Is that what you really want?" 

"I think it would be best for now. We can figure out what we really want out of this, if we even want it." You sighed. 

"I know what I want, and I'll fight for it. Even if I have to burn this world to the ground. But if this is what you want, I'll respect it. " Eddie muttered. 

"Thank you, Eddie. I think you should get back to Wayne and Evelyn. I'm gonna hop in the shower and gather myself. Lock the door when you leave, please?"

"Sure thing. I'll see you later."

You head to your room and start your shower. Before Eddie leaves, he picks up the phone and dials *69. The phone rings a few times before Keanu picks up. 

"Hello?"

"Look fucko, whatever you think you have with Y/N, you don't anymore. Leave her the fuck alone." Eddie gritted through his teeth with a clenched jaw. 

"Oh, this must be Eddie, her ex that cheated on her while she was pregnant and up until the point she kicked you out. Look dude, she's a big girl, she can make her own decisions. We're having fun and living in the moment. But I do see myself pursuing this for the long run. May the best man win, bud." Keanu chuckled. 

"Yeah? Well… Dogstar is dog shit!" Eddie yells before he hangs up. 

'What an asshole.' Thought Eddie.

When you came back out, Eddie was already gone. You weren't sure if you did the right thing or not. Maybe you should have broken things off with Keanu. You decided to grab some breakfast at your favorite diner. As soon as you were leaving the phone range. 

"Hello?"

"Hey there, beautiful, how are you?"

"Hey, Keanu! I'm okay, a bit hungry, so I'm on my way to get some breakfast. How are you?"

"I'm great, just missing you. Would you be able to have dinner with me tonight?"

"Oh, you're coming home early? Yeah, Evelyn is with Eddie and her granddad for the week. So I'm hanging solo."

"Unfortunately, I'm not coming home early, but I'd like to fly you out for a few days, if that's okay?"

"Of course! I'll let Eddie know that I'm going out of town for a few days."

"Perfect. I'll have a driver pick you up in two hours. Don't worry about packing, we'll go shopping. See you later, Y/N."

"Bye, Keanu."

You're all smiles and butterflies. You grab your sunglasses and head out the door to the diner. In a few hours, you'll be in the arms of another man. Did it make you feel bad? A bit, but you deserved to be happy. 

Divider @racingairplanes

A/n- I feel like I formatted weird due to the amount of dialogue or maybe it's just me ¯\_(ツ)_/¯ let me know what you think. Leave comments, reblog, and like. It's greatly appreciated.

Tag list: @marvelnbangtanslut @bimbobaggins69 @heyyimmisunderstood @hiscrimsonangel @sweet-villain

[gwilin-stay-winnin]

AO3 Twenty Questions

tagged by @ladytanithia. a big thank you, as always!

tagging @inkoherentwriting, @azures-grace and YOU, dear reader

(copy/paste for the questions below the cut)

1 – How many works do you have on AO3?

Four, not counting the work I published as a reference list for my OCs.

2 – What's your total AO3 word count?

84,627

3 – What fandoms do you write for?

Just TES:Skyrim for the moment. Sadly, I haven't been able to play any of the other games just yet.

4 – What are your top five fics by kudos?

I'm dying for Among the Many Lost Souls to surpass Sought and Found. It was my first venture into longform writing and it shows. Bleh.

5 – Do you respond to comments?

Almost always. If I don't respond, it's usually because I tried my darndest and couldn't think of a constructive or meaningful response.

6 – What is the fic you wrote with the angstiest ending?

The one I'm writing right now :3c (Among the Many Lost Souls). I'm putting Gwilin through the wringer and then I'm gonna hang him out to dry.

7 – What's the fic you wrote with the happiest ending?

Sought and Found, I suppose.

8 – Do you get hate on fics?

No, I don't. I lowkey wish I did. Firstly, because haters can be remarkably perceptive, and, secondly, because I am as interested in what makes someone scrunch up their nose or click away from my fic as I am about hearing people's thoughts on what was well-executed about them. I think my stuff is too niche to really draw a lot of negative attention (right now, at least).

9 – Do you write smut? If so, what kind?

Always, my man! I consider it my moral duty to make my characters fuck nasty. Why? BECAUSE IT'S HOT DUHHH

10 – Do you write crossovers? What's the craziest one you've written?

People who write crossovers scare me so bad. I can barely limp my way through having to structure a plot around already-existing lore and making sure everything that happens in the story is congruent with in-universe rules, meanwhile there are people out there writing Skyrim x The Walking Dead crossovers. It's cocobananas.

11 – Have you ever had a fic stolen?

Not as far as I know. I don't really give a fuck if people steal my shit. Fighting with someone over authorship of a work that is principally riding on the coattails of an existing IP, which can't even be monetized, mind you, feels like a real 'race to the bottom' situation to me. I'm well aware of the quality of my work and I'm proud to have the drive to constantly better my skills. That's all that matters.

12 – Have you ever had a fic translated?

Nope. Though I did start translating Sought and Found into Spanish, I dropped it when I started writing Among the Many Lost Souls. In any case, I would be so, so touched if someone decided to translate a fic of mine.

13 – Have you ever co-written a fic?

Also nope. Never tried collaborative writing outside of an academic setting. Totally open to it, though!

14 – What's your all-time favorite ship?

Uh, I'm not real big on shipping existing characters. I mostly just think about my OCs, or my friend's OCs, with each other. Aside from Gwilin x [pretty much every other NPC in Skyrim], I think thoughts about @abstractredd's guys, Hedgrod and Athrar, quite often.

15 – What's a WIP you want to finish but doubt you ever will?

Fic-related WIP? Just one. I wanted to write another romance fic (like Sought and Found) featuring a netch farmer who's a cowboy-type character. Sexy Dunmer with a southwestern accent. Brokeback Mountain: Morrowind Edition. You get the picture.

I might still finish it, but I'm reluctant to even touch it because I haven't played Morrowind, and would have to do a real deep-dive into everything related to Dunmer in TES lore to write it. I know a lot already, but I never feel like I know enough, y'know?

16 – What are your writing strengths?

I've been told I'm good at setting a scene and painting a picture. This is, I think, a new ability I acquired in the past year or so. I've also been told my smut-writing abilities are pretty good, which is always nice to hear :) If I had to list what I consider to be my own strengths, I'd add that I've gotten a lot better at cutting the fat out of my writing (especially from dialogue tags and in describing facial expressions and body language).

17 – What are your writing weaknesses?

Dialogue is a bitch a half for me to write. It's probably the thing I most obsessively tweak before publishing. I think my dialogue tends to fall short.

Pacing is another issue. I often criticize, in other fic author's works, that they present an interesting image or idea and then leave me hungry because they don't elaborate on it, but I am the biggest culprit of this if I don't constantly remind myself that, yes, people want to hear more about this or that. They want you to mystify it, justify it, make it sexy, make it like a puzzle for them to solve. You can't just leave it cut-and-dry, much as my autism compels to do because "It's quite literally saying the same thing". Like, that's great, bestie, but you have to elaborate! Say the same thing just make it sound cooler than it is!

18 – Thoughts on writing dialogue in another language in fic?

This is cool. I don't mind busting out Google Translate to enjoy a fic. That mouse-hovering feature that lets you add alternative text to a fic on ao3 is super useful for this sort of thing.

19 – First fandom you wrote for?

My first, and only other, fandom: My Little Pony. I was 12.

20 – Favorite fic you've written?

I love them all for different reasons, BUT Among the Many Souls has blood and sex and drama in it, so yeah. It's in the lead.

1 – How many works do you have on AO3?

2 – What's your total AO3 word count?

3 – What fandoms do you write for?

4 – What are your top five fics by kudos?

5 – Do you respond to comments?

6 – What is the fic you wrote with the angstiest ending?

7 – What's the fic you wrote with the happiest ending?

8 – Do you get hate on fics?

9 – Do you write smut? If so, what kind?

10 – Do you write crossovers? What's the craziest one you've written?

11 – Have you ever had a fic stolen?

12 – Have you ever had a fic translated?

13 – Have you ever co-written a fic?

14 – What's your all-time favorite ship?

15 – What's a WIP you want to finish but doubt you ever will?

16 – What are your writing strengths?

17 – What are your writing weaknesses?

18 – Thoughts on writing dialogue in another language in fic?

19 – First fandom you wrote for?

20 – Favorite fic you've written?

[simmonsized]

🥑🌻🪐🥐☁️🎨 🧩 for Writers Truth & Dare Ask Game

1. 🥑 ⇢ you accidentally killed somebody, which mutual(s) do you text for help?

Probably the members of my Broblematic server (@outofstrings (bird and fae collectively, u may know of the Post-Cal ask blog), @future-geometries (Jess u are the first person I thought of) and definitely @alexharrier , who I think would probably hide me from the law even if I didn't explain the crime. I am not including beloved @chaton-katreal because I think she is too gentle, i would not want to muck up her life with murder!)

Or you know, my actual partner @notanotherdoodleblog probably LOL

All fantastic people, worth of hiding crimes.

2. 🌻 ⇢ tag someone you appreciate but don't talk to on a regular basis

Honestly most of my friends are pretty busy adulting 8( so we don't get to talk as much as I'd like to. @eggwyrt because our timezones are almost earth opposites. I love u!!!! I miss you!!

3. 🪐 ⇢ name three good things going on in your life right now

- I've got two real life best friends that I get together with and have coffee every weekend together, and sometimes do other things, and this is significant to me because adulthood makes it hard to keep friends, let alone see them.

- I got into the marine ecology lab at my school that I have been pushing for entrance into, despite missing a pre-req. I get to be on a boat for eight hours next quarter! Woohoo!

- I got fanart for a fic I am very proud of but very rarely interact with anybody about, which has boosted my confidence and made me feel really good, and each comment I've gotten since they posted the art has made my heart sing extra loud!

4. 🥐 ⇢ name one internet reference that will always make you laugh

Tbh I can't think of anything off the top of my head. My partner and I met through RVB, however, so we reference old seasons to each other fairly regularly, and I like to think we have a pretty good time c:

5. ☁️ ⇢ what made you choose your username?

(i do not even like Simmons that much but it's a solid username and now is part of my brand. also I am classically a blue team girly lol)

6. 🎨 ⇢ link your favourite piece of fanart and explain why you like it

This is an impossible task. Insurmountable, even. There are several!! Many!!! How can I pick one?? So I will list a few:

A. Everything anyone has ever drawn for my fanfics at all ever.

B. SPECIFICALLY everything @alexharrier has drawn for me, ever. Especially specially specially these two gifs which actually make me fucking insane every time I see them.

Honestly, this had me making sounds so incoherent only dogs could hear them, years ago when I did not consider my fic would be special to anyone. I really really really treasure them.

Also both my birthday gifts, Bro at Disneyland, and Bro at Home Depot 💕

C. This artwork for RNG chapter 66, from @101-sve . It is also special to me, and it's been my wallpaper on my phone ever since c: the atmosphere, the warmth, the halo of their hair i just... Yeah!!!!

D. Recent, probably familiar still, this Holy Fucking Shit Beautiful Atmospheric work of art for metempsychosis!!!! by @askinsufferableprickmod . I really actually cannot stop looking at it. It's so gorgeous, and honestly even if it had nothing to do with me I would still be in love with it. The concept of the kids are Gods, as beings outside the mortal world they made for themselves, all that is visible here, and I really really love it!

* I know all of these are things people have drawn for me, for my content, but honestly that is why they are my favorites! It is touching to see someone put heart into something that is related to something you, yourself, also put heart into!!! I love it!!!! I love these talented artists!!!!!

ALSO: we all know Theater of Coolty, but it is so beloved to me, I can recite it in my sleep lol.

7. 🧩 ⇢ what will make you click away from a fanfiction immediately

On top of the other reasons I said I don't like things, you do actually have to convince me 6 times outta 10 if you want me to read a Homestuck fic in the third person. There is just something to the flavor of 2nd person that hits different. There is a reason different perspectives exist, and I think they can all be utilized well, but something about that classic, well-patterned "you, and then you" just gets me, you know?

[decayingshrike]

Pairings: Matt Murdock x M!reader

Warnings: unedited, reader drinks and smokes and tries to kiss matt while under influence.

Summary: Reader with BPD has Matt as their fp

Matt and I had known each other since college, us both having had the same psych 101 class. Meeting him then made it so I could look past most of his faults, but ever since that first month, I could hardly tell if he had any faults at all. The way I feel about him bordered on obsession, it is obsession; the way I feel about him is unhealthy. I have felt this way for roughly ten years now, being there for practically everything that mattered.

I perk up from my chair beside him, I think he was calling my name.

"You alright?"

He looks worried, I feel terrible for worrying him but part of me revels in the attention. I nodded my head simply, stating I was tired, the case I was helping on went on for a while last night was all. Worry for me, worry for me, worry for me runs through my head like a disease. Matt just smiles.

"You know, you don't technically work for us, it's a wonder why you still help. Not that I'm unhappy, obviously. Having someone read out the files rather than listening to a robot is... helpful."

helpful god. I smile. I want to kiss you. I feel like I have been in his grasp for practically ever by now.

I just nod at him. I'd rather help than see him and Foggy scrounge around for hours while I sit on my lazy ass doing nothing at home. It helps me stay active, I say. Matt just shrugs, your smile is everything to me is all I can think while I stare at his shining teeth. As much as I hate to admit it, him being unable to see me has made my heart grow fonder. I can stare at him as much as I please, except, of course, when Foggy or Karen take notice.

“The work, if we may?”

I hear Karen giggle. So far, to my knowledge, she is the only one that is aware of my so-called tendencies. God I don’t know what I would do if Matt ever found out. I want to tell him, obviously, but I worry he'll respond with disgust or resentment. He's not the resentment type, not for anything like this, but it still is something that lingers for me.

“Come on Karen, just a break for the night won’t hurt. We can head down to the bar, Foggy’s already half asleep and it seems he-” Matt points at me, “is too.”

Karen sighs, running her hands through her hair, and agrees to take a break. She’s a worse workaholic than Matt but I don’t blame her, she’s rather good at what she does too.

At the bar I’m already six shots in of straight vodka. I’ve always been a lightweight so I'm already past hammered and am beginning to border on blackout. All four of us are playing what seems to be 8 ball but Foggy keeps throwing in different rules almost definitely to fuck with me and Matt. I see Karen helping Matt line up his next shot and almost puke in jealousy. The way her face is flushed pink makes me green in envy. It should be me, it should be me, it should have been me. I take a breath and another shot and I’m fine. I don’t think I can drive home tonight. I say I’ll be right back and go outside and light up a cigarette. 

After a few minutes, I hear the door and the familiar sound of a cane tap tap tapping against the wall and ground. 

“I could smell your cigarette from all the way inside.”

I mumble a sort of apology but laugh half way through at the idea of him even being able to do that. I make a joke about it being a superpower and suddenly Matt goes silent, but only for a moment. His face twitches out of his smile but he regains his composure and just laughs. 

“I wish.”

He chokes out, coughing on the smoke.

I beg Matt to take me home. It comes out as more of a sob than I’d prefer but it’s fine. Matt just sighs and nods. Why do you seem so tired of me? I snuff out my cigarette and head back inside, wobbling all the while. I gather my things and say my goodbyes, Karen sees Matt leaving with me and winks, this all goes right over Foggy’s head. 

Walking home with him is perfect, he’s perfect, I need you.

“What?”

I shake my head up, the question sobering within itself. I ask what he means.

“You said you needed me?”

He sounds confused. Are you disgusted? I think he might be. I mumble out a sorry, unable to even make a coherent defense. I slur out a question I can’t remember. 

“Yeah I know.”

What? What did I ask?

“I know you have… feelings… for me.”

Oh. Fuck. 

I notice we take a left where we usually take a right and ask where we’re going.

“I’m taking you to my place, if that’s alright. I want to keep an eye on you. You drank a lot.”

He’s worried, he’s worried, he’s worried, and I’m glad.

Finally in the apartment, he practically drags me up the stairs and we both laugh all the way up, but for some reason it feels tense. I think I’m obsessed with you. It came out jumbled, it wasn’t supposed to come out at all but I caught it right at the last word, just not in time. Matt doesn’t respond. He helps me lay down on the couch and sits next to me.

“I don’t know how to respond to that. I like you, I do, but I know how this works for you and I don’t want you to get hurt.”

I’ll get more hurt if you do nothing, I announce louder than intended. I ask to kiss him, I beg to kiss him. Maybe if he’s as drunk as I am, he will.

“No. I’m sorry.”

I practically sob, I should just kiss him while he’s so close to me, who cares if I’m drunk. He cares, He Cares. The last reasonable part of my brain whispers at me to stop, so I don’t. 

I whisper how sorry I am, Matt says he knows. I lay down in his lap and he caresses my hair, he kisses me on the forehead. I want you here I want you here I want you here Please just say yes. 

I feel myself drifting and I feel horrible. Just kiss me. 

I sob into his lap, I feel manipulative for this. I feel my eyelids grow heavier, and just as I feel myself drifting to sleep, Matt tells me

“Tomorrow, maybe, if you feel the same.”

And I smile.

[rubenesque-as-fuck]

Bruh you should just text date guy. If you feel shit about things the way they are now, don't let that be the precedent you set going forward. There's still a good chance he wants another date and will get back to you if you give him a nudge.

If it turns out you need more validation than this guy can provide... then yeah I guess you're back to swiping. But you haven't lost anything. It's gotta be less effort to find someone who already makes you feel good than try to change someone who doesn't.

You're doing great. I'm rooting for you 💜

(Also sorry for the unsolicited advice but reading your post was like hearing my own thoughts a couple years back and at the very least you deserve to know that your void shouting is landing with people that value you in this space)

Fiiiiiine I texted him! Lol we'll see if I hear back. I mean, I almost certainly will *at some point*. He didn't give ghosty fuckboy vibes, but it was clear he had a lot of other stuff going on too. I'm just terrified of being needy or wanting too much from someone else ever.

However I should probably ALSO get back to swiping because I already know that even if this goes well in the context of a FWB, that is ultimately just a stopgap measure and not what I actually want or have ever wanted. I want a real relationship with someone, an honest loving relationship where we are important and committed to each other and to building a life together. But since it seems like everybody on the apps is just trying to fuck, that's what I feel I have to settle for at this point. I've been single since getting dumped by my abusive ex over 8 years ago. I've had sex with one person in the last 7 years. I really, really tried holding out for the kind of relationship I actually want but now my pussy is full of dust and cobwebs and if I wait for too much longer to be touched by someone I fear it may shrivel up and blow away in the wind like it got snapped in Endgame.

(Also no worries, the advice is fine! I'm glad to know that the void shouts back sometimes.)

[horce-divorce]

i'm so over this delta 8 shit. like yeah it's better than not having anything but it's not weed and it's not doing the same thing. i miss weed so much. d8 makes me cough so bad, it's weak as hell even when it's really good stuff, and it seemingly has 0 cbd compounds unless you buy the more expensive, cbd added/"live resin" type stuff. it doesn't help my pain at all, and its so much more expensive than weed no matter how you slice it. plus we always need more of it bc it's so weak. those 1g carts from Michigan were lasting Bel and I about 3 days each between the two of us. we go through a whole 2g cart of d8 in that amount of time or less. it's ridiculous.

and the thing is, when i lived here before, yeah, i had like 3 or 4 weedguys i could rotate between to get real stuff anyway. not so anymore. i've been gone for almost 4 years and they've really been cracking down on drugs around here in the interim. it's given the d8 market a massive foothold, but it's seriously been impossible to find a regular weedguy. every time we've almost found a lead, we start hearing about raids or the guy goes MIA. we'd basically either have to drive to the border ourselves at this point, or just cave and use the d8 that's available locally. and we're broke, so we've been doing the latter, obviously lol

weed has been keeping me off a feeding tube for years. my doctors in michigan told me outright to keep using it because they didn't want to prescribe me opioids. and then i move back to the only state in this whole area where weed is still illegal lmao. d8 has been keeping me off a tube lately, but tbqh i don't think it will continue to. my MALS attacks have been getting more frequent (which makes my POTS a lot worse), I'm eating less again, and even when i do manage to eat, it takes so much out of me and is still so painful, I usually end up having to sleep afterwards. i'm losing so much of my day just for having the audacity to feed myself and it's making me depressed again. i'm even on an antidepressant this time!!! it's also helping a little bit with the pain, but not enough to matter in the long run. i'm still gonna end up on a tube at this rate.

i'm also just sick of living in wisconsin so that makes me cranky, too. i love who i live with, being with my boyfriend and my roommate is great, but i've spent like 16 years living in wisconsin against my will already and somehow I KEEP fucking ending up back here, always against my will, and it's always pissed me off, but now it ALSO has the audacity to be the one (1) state in the whole area that won't let me have the one medication all my doctors have agreed is saving my life. every other state touching us, on every single side, has weed. canada has weed. 24 fucking states have legalized it. but no, wisconsin has to stick it's heels in the mud and keep that boot on our necks at ANY cost, especially over a change that would benefit literally everyone and increase revenue overall. i fucking hate it here.

america as a whole needs to get it's head out of it's ass about pain management. not just cannabis, but opioids and any other alternatives, too. but of course, the cruelty is the point. they want us to be suffering. they want to torture us. they want us to be stuck in ineffective health management loops until we die. more profit for insurance companies and hospitals, less "handouts" needed back, less conscientious objectors and protestors and political dissidents to be bothersome, less noisy disabled voices calling for justice in the world.

i am determined to keep trying to manage my MALS for as long as I can without getting surgery and, hopefully, without being on opioids (not because I buy into the fearmongering, but because of how strict the rules are about being prescribed them, about the lists you end up on, the random piss tests, and all the other bureaucratic crap that comes along with it). and if we end up staying here long-term, then yeah I will be doing everything i can to try and get weed legalized here to.

but i'm just pissed. and tired. i'm sick of having to fight for my stupid little life from every single facet, like, i'm fighting for my life and kicking screaming throwing up etc and it barely even amounts to a squeak in the grand scheme of things.

welp. too bad. i'm surviving out of spite. oh, i don't matter? cool, then it won't matter if I stay alive a bit longer and keep taking those pithy handouts, i guess! thanks! 🤪

[h3rmess]

Do u want to hear a fun fact about me ?😍 yes? Wow!.

In 2023 august I had a painful tooth ache for 2 days. My mom tried planning an appointment for me at the dentist, but specifically during the week of 21-28 (I don't know I'm bluffing, but late august) they were BUSY. They were supposedly packed.

So my jaw becomes swollen, like REALLY swollen. My sharp jaw (that doesn't exist)? GONE. It was SWOLLEN. I looked HORRIBLE. my mom like "tf happened to u" so shes like, "bro PLEASE make an appointment. Hello???" and the dentist is like "nah dawg we got too much. Go to the ER or something."

Its now the 3rd day ish of it, and like 7 p.m. my mom like "vivian cmon beta we gotta go to the ER." And I'm like "HOLY SHIT." because I have a very high immune system. I hardly get sick. When I do, its not BAD (it kinda is, but whatev. because early 2023, I believe I got a really bad stomach bug. But other than that, I haven't been sick)

The nearest hospital (for context I live in a city, but right at the point where its like the border of the suburb and the city iykwim) was like 40 FLIPPING minutes. Or 30. IDK, I was pretty "WHAT THE FUCK" in this moment. My mom freaking hate car rides mostly. In my opinion, its because of the crazy ass drivers that drive their kids to school buts that a whole different topic. We drive to the hospital and since my ugly siblings weren't coming, I got the whole back seat to me. I get like a typical check up when we like sign in. their like "wait, we got patients" so we wait.

We ended up waiting like a whole hour.

When its my turn to go, I don't remember, but I'm in a small hospital room. They check my swollen jaw for like something idk.

also WEIRD encounter alert: the doctors (3 males, 2 very elderly men) but 1 was actually checking me. So he inserts his finger in my mouth. I swear to GOD he says "deep" just DEEP when he inserts his FINGER in my MOUTH. my MINOR mouth. My CHILD mouth. The 2 elderly men laugh. FUCKING LAUGH. like I swear to JESUS, my dead grandma, and that is all holy, I never felt anything more uncomfortable than fhat. And my MOTHER. The women that BIRTHED me was WATCHING. SITTING right in front of ME. Like I was still a petween (whatever its called) at the time!! Like HELLO??Remember my jaw was SWOLLEN. I couldn't SPEAK. I couldn't sing my fight song!!!

But thankfully they leave. I get an different doctors (2 lovely men) after that. Now its almost 8:30 pm.??.

also funny encounter (whatever considered funny to u hermes) the main doctor because the other doctor it was his first day at the job asked me how'd I like my water. I say small ice because like I mean a small quantity of ice. And he's like "okay your Highness" So ig that was funny.

Now heres the dumbness of me really comes because idk if the cat scan takes place before the funny encounter or after. But probably after if I had to guess. I don't know a cat scan is. So their fucking wheel chairing me to the cat scan room. Like pushhhhhhhh. I wanted to laugh but it hurt to speak. The cat scan itself was pretty kewl. I saw light buzzyear and woody anf other fictional characters. It was pretty weird to take off your shoes in a room full of adults but k.

i finished the cat scan. It was mostly looking up inside a literal tube canal thing. but light buzz year was innit so I'm pretty cool with it. Im back in my room now. They tell my mom something. Im staying in this hospital over night. Like I'm healthy mostly. I ain't ever get sick. Especially to the point of hospitalization. I've never been hospitalized at this point of my years of living.

So this is part 1 :p srry for info dumping.

Vivian lore!! >_<

HELP THIS IS SO INTERESTING

those damn doctors better get their hands off you unless they wanna see my alpha side 😈😈