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sugar-petals · 3 years

Note

can you give us more thoughts about domestic yoongles? the taemin's one (wich I love) just made me miss the cat boy so much ;o;

i have a phd in househusband yoongi so let me fire out some ideas for ya.

myg at home headcanon

🐱 word count. 1.9k | fluff, slice of life, slight nsfw mentions, x reader, bullet points

The doorbell sound is a recording of Yoongi imitating a doorbell. He’s such a meme. Ceci n'est pas une pipe.

Seemingly, he teaches himself a new recipe every week. To perfection. Yoongi is very particular about sticking to the recipe and wielding his kitchen tools in the right way. He collects knives, olive oil, and still hates cutting onions.

He separates sleep time, work time, and couple time as the holy trinity. For each, he switches his mood.

Blushes easily no matter for how long you’ve been together.

Establishes his own radio show where he DJs at one point.

Yoongi keeps an extreme track on the garbage schedule. He knows exactly what is due when. Separating the trash is a must. That includes sorting out fake friends trying to get between your relationship. Your social circle as a couple is extremely deliberate.

Yoongi deems himself a terrible host for guests. Unless Hoseok is there to drag him out, it's true he rather stays in the kitchen or at the barbecue preparing the menu courses rather than making small talk. He leaves the hospitality bits to you, however you want to go about it.

What he lacks in conversing with guests, he makes up in bed, God is absolutely fair.

He sings and hums pretty often and has his own vernacular of extraterrestrial uwu noises. It's an alphabet that you have to yet decipher but it's incredibly cute.

Self-made paintings everywhere around his house.

Yoongi hasn't gone clubbing since grammar school. The most he does is going to a restaurant at lunch with very close friends. And always in a work context. His private life is so secluded from everything else and paparazzi just don't spot him anywhere, Dispatch thinks he must live abroad.

Very well, he does consider his big ole house a separate country. It's a living organism with a studio, gym, trophy room, small-size basketball court, and vastly equipped kitchen. A home theater as well, he likes American movies (like Inception) and Korean action genres, and you can stream whatever you fancy in there whenever you like.

Yes, he has underwear with cute little bears on.

There's even a little pond in the backyard. Yoongi, Pisces he is, likes fishes after all. Sometimes he sits at the edge of the 'Little Ole Min Lake (LOML)' and stares into the water for literal hours with his chin parked on his palm.

His fridge is so high-tech and futuristic, even Yoongi is rendered clueless by its AI sometimes. The washing machine, too.

Yoongi watches RuPaul’s drag race. What did you expect? He finds it so humorous.

Owns lord knows how many comic collections.

Favorite holiday destination: New York.

Christmas is basically 50% you unveiling new music equipment to him in the garage and Yoongi almost fainting at the sexiness of it. The other 50% is spent holding hands and orgasm after orgasm until the new year since you loose track of time.

Goes on long rants why he’d marry you again every weekend.

Making you presents is his specialty. Always accompanied with a hand-written note. He writes a lot of things by hand for you in general. Texting, basically never. Always on paper.

No sex without a blanket and socks on. Yoongi gets cold very very easily and just doesn’t like showing skin. You buy him a heated blanket for his birthday, he even uses it in his studio chair.

Chronically addicted to making out.

Matching black outfits and glasses.

Laughs at even your worst jokes or phrases you didn’t expect you even uttered.

Yoongi owns the phoniest, most secretive-looking black car ever and nobody knows about it. Even he forgets he owns it, in fact he genuinely acts like it just doesn’t exist. Hilarious. And that guy has a level 1 Korean driver's license. Which allows him to drive trailers and busses and fucking trucks, and construction machines, let that sink in.

It's really a genius curse. Yoongi being put to the test will always deliver but he won't choose to execute his full skillset if he doesn't have to. Well, pragmatic. He's not as phony as he thinks he is, which is even more hilarious.

He uses that behemoth of a car so scarcely because he'd rather have things delivered to his doorstep and he's stingy with gas. Also, he doesn't like traffic and driving because of the traumatic shoulder accident and his tendency to space out. Translation: You drive that thing... that monster... it really is an impressive, fast, and scary machine.

If someone devious ever even remotely manages to invade his privacy and get past the doubly-installed security system, he has enough money to deal with it no matter what.

If it concerns your privacy, he's a red belt. And owns Jin's number if a taekwondo master is required. Jimin's if it needs someone with kendo skills.

If Yoongi needs someone to go on a complete rampage, Jungkook lives just down the block. He can sprint to Yoongi's bunker I mean mansion within 45 seconds. 30 if it's very urgent. 20 if the reward is an instant ramen splurge with Yoongi's black card.

He has a sexy, glamorous sword collection hanging on the living room wall anyways, so. Who the hell is dumb enough to mess with him and his expensive lawyer in the first place.

But just in case, who knows... Yoongi settles matters shruggingly, anonymously, and with cash and he's too exhausted for violence, but don't underestimate his deter-min-ation and network for emergencies. Also, he is Agust D after all.

He will bonk a naughty burglar or kidnapper across the head with a wooden cooking spoon or take him down by throwing a basketball if the situation requires it. Damn, his reflexes are so fast, a feral cat in motion. So, lean back and sip on your drink of choice. Things are cared for.

If Yoongi is the one being kidnapped or a highly skilled stalker invades the property at night when he's fast asleep (nothing can wake this man during certain hours, strong REM right here): Don't forget that honeyboy is a Dodgers fan. There are signed baseball bats everywhere in this damn house.

In that sense, your parents visiting you here for the first time thought you were an undercover thug couple. Not to worry mom and dad, you both just like sports very much okay.

Yoongi walks around in all black clothes and the rooms are all seemingly dark. Even if you live together, you don't know his skin care routine. It's clear to you he's some sort of vampire.

Since Yoongi always forgets to remove his makeup, you made it a habit to wipe it down when he's about to pass out. He won't lie, he enjoys that kind of affection.

Holly is your resident child. You're essentially a family.

He insists to tackle this by himself, Yoongi sees his therapist monthly. Not shifting responsibility is something he's stubborn about and he pours his emotions into writing. You will do conversation about deeper stuff, but he says it's mostly up to him and his own mind. He dislikes burdening you or opening up too much and it's something to respect rather than force him about. If he wants to share a thought, he will. It doesn’t mean he can’t trust you or sucks at communicating (we know that he’s direct). Yoongi simply can’t put that much pain in such few words nor should you alleviate it for him.

Calls from the manager faze Yoongi as much as Jimin is bothered by gravity. If he’s busy kissing your body slow mo, who the hell dares to disturb his worship.

This man had so many let-downs and interpersonal catastrophes in his life, he's super discerning with people. Because he rolls that way, during their first meeting Yoongi uses his psychology certificate on your friends. You see him squint at them, he listens very closely. After they pass the vibe check aka meow radar, he befriends them, too.

Yoongi doodles Grammy trophies everywhere to manifest them.

Yoongi shaves his legs.

All the sex toys he’s ever bought are black. Gotta vibe in style.

He spends ridiculous amounts of time in the studio but he's yours for the remainder of the night, breakfast, and he makes a lavish lunch and dinner.

Um, consider his head parked between your legs. The Hongkong line was not a joke.

Doesn’t mind you squishing his cheeks whenever and for how long you like.

Every other weekend he gets flowers, vouchers, and gifts — not because of fans, they don’t know where his house is, but because he donates so much.

Namjoon often drops by and cleanses the area with his crystals.

Yoongi is a photography major so you can ask him to take professional, ceiling-high black and white shots of you.

Feeding each other food lovingly. Man, this guy got lips.

He set up a library just for you, in the exact historical aesthetic you like the most. Send him the link to any book you want, it's basically in the online shopping cart already. As I said, he wants to make you presents like every week.

Sometimes he sits on the other end studying English videos and vocab while you read. And yes, he's already 95% fluent but pretends being merely intermediate. He knows technical terms even native speakers have never heard of.

He collects pajamas and earrings.

Swears on the phone.

Namjoon being the horniest member is a cover-up story. Yoongi masturbates almost unreasonable amounts of times, by himself and in your arms when going to bed. Not gonna lie, it’s a sight to see his hands at work. He’s almost equally obsessed with fingering you once you ask him.

Yoongi was the one asking you to move in and almost had a nervous meltdown before meeting up with you to tell you just that.

He’s the little spoon and of course a sleeping burrito to hold tight.

Finds you equally attractive in any state or styling. Yoongi practices what he preaches, he always reacts the same and says the same.

Jams out to outrageous beats Namjoon sends him by dancing in the studio. You walk in on him every time. Was embarrassed at first, now you dance along.

Has bought you a life-sized Yoongi pillow and customized you a giant Shooky to hug when he’s not at home over night.

Owned a wine cellar until he quit drinking. Turned it into a piano room instead.

Only you know Yoongi has a serpent and dagger tattoo.

Scrubs the bathroom religiously.

The house smells like restaurant food and his extravagant perfumes half of the time.

Sometimes he has to remind himself he’s married to you and not his coffee machine. He shall be forgiven. You can’t complain that he doesn’t love you enough, nor is he ever not adorable when drinking his latte.

Never wears short sleeves. It can be scorching and he’ll wear a jacket.

Tell him and the cap stays on during sex.

He grows his hair out and puts it in a low bun. The bangs remain.

Yoongi has installed the most fire-proof building in the entire city it seems. That he wanted to be a firefighter when he was young definitely shows. Figures the house has to be protected from heat: His blasting studio music and Yoongi himself are just way too sizzling.

Still melts into a puddle when you kiss his nose.

Couple sunrise watching.

#yoongi #yoongi hc #yoongi x reader #bts #bts x reader #bts hc #yoongi scenario

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softluci · 4 years

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aggressive affection, i think

(part two here!)

[ @yourlocalsinnamonroll (hi!) sent me an ask to do more gen z headcanons and i started working on something for her, except it isn’t actually a set of headcanons, but rather a really long...one-shot? but anyway, i thought of actual headcanons that i can share now, so i can return to my ROOTS hopefully this will do in the meantime. ]

i’m not sure if this is something unique to younger people, but i am one hundred percent sure that younger people do it a lot, just going off of the behavior of my friends and i. (i’m gonna tell you now that this isn’t entirely sfw, so minors dni please and thank u)

but i’ve found that it’s pretty common for friends to be, like, aggressively affectionate with one another, for lack of a better phrase. if not aggressively affectionate, then just really flirtatious, often for no reason, and it is still meant entirely in a platonic sense. some examples of this that i have experienced include, but are not limited to:

“i’m gonna eat you,” “do u wanna make out,” “just remember, no matter WHAT happens, i will ALWAYS wanna make out with you,” “i have literally wanted to fuck all of you at some point,” “let’s have sex,” “stfu before i kiss you,” [points to lap] “is this seat taken?” “every day i’m like, ‘wow, [name] is so cool, we should make out,’” and so on and so forth.

so you can imagine the fun i’m about to have.

lucifer

“blindsided,” does not even begin to describe what you’ve done to this man. while his recovery time was quick, he was still so, so confused.

all he said was, “you look nice today,” why did you threaten to kiss him? was that even a threat?

he doesn’t know because you said, “stop before you get kissed on the mouth,” but it doesn’t matter because you failed to consider that he is obsessed with you in dire need of a kiss on the mouth, and you, silly thing that you are, just provided conditions under which he can get one.

that said, have fun trying to explain to this man that you were joking while he’s holding you against him with the most smug look on his dumb little face. if you don’t wanna kiss him, okay, but by the time he feels like letting you go, your face is gonna be scorching and you will have properly learned not to do that again. unless you enjoyed yourself, in which case—

by the way, if you believe in a higher power, you had better pray he doesn’t do this to you because now that you’ve planted the idea in his villainous little brain, he’s just biding his time. so the next time you compliment him innocently, and he says, “be quiet before i kiss you,” like the monster he is, assert your dominance by kissing him first, it’s the only way to maintain your dignity.

mammon

why would you do that to him. he is literally in love with you, you can’t be doing this. he knows he’s an attractive person, but you can’t tell him that, and you especially can’t do it by flirting with him, it’s embarrassingly disarming. especially since he was going to make fun of you once he saw that you were looking at the issue of majolish with him on the cover. he had a plan and everything, and you ruined it. he was gonna say something dumb cool, after which you would be embarrassed , and he would laugh.

but then you looked at him, said, “i’m gonna eat you,” and his entire plan was thwarted. now you have to stand there and watch him struggle to form a sentence while his face gets red. you should take this opportunity to bite him, give him a little nom on the shoulder or something, just to razz him. it’ll be great, i promise.

luckily, he can’t even think about doing this to you without having to lie down, so you should be safe—unless, of course, he catches both you and himself by surprise. so if you get nommed on, you had it coming.

levi

you menace. you absolute villain. you’re laughing.

levi was about to go into a match he was nervous about, and then you said, “it’s okay, no matter what happens, i will always wanna make out with you,” and then he dropped his controller and blacked out, and you’re laughing.

you’re terrible. absolutely awful. acquaint yourself with shame while you blow cool air into his face and shake him awake.

when he does wake up, and he reminds you that he’s the avatar of envy, do nawt be surprised.

try to explain to him that you were kidding and let it slip that you say these types of things to everyone and you’re getting a tail around your waist. no matter how much he might stutter while he makes his point, the fact remains that he’s the only one you’re allowed to say these things to now. you can do it to the others while he’s not around if you feel so inclined, but he’s going to find out eventually, so good luck explaining yourself while he doesn’t keep his tail still when he uses it to hold you in place.

your only saving grace here is that he is physically incapable of doing it to you, but, you know. that probably gets overridden by how possessive he’s gonna get.

satan

you’re deranged. or just really confident. or a fool. it doesn’t matter, you fucked up. he said a normal thing, and then you threw him for a loop.

you were nervous about an exam the next day, he said, “you’re a capable person, you have nothing to be worried about.”

and then you, evidently forgetting that he is not one of your human friends, said, “flattery will get you made out with,” and tried to walk away.

first of all, how was that flattery? he was stating a fact. second of all, who said he didn’t wanna make out with you🤨. he never said that, you are making assumptions about him and his character.

anyway, he has no idea where you think you’re going, but you didn’t make it very far before he caught up to you anyway.

when he repeats what you said back to you in the form of a question, with that deceptively polite look on his face, know that he is being rhetorical. do not bother trying to explain yourself, it’ll be difficult to do so in a convincing manner while he’s backing you up to the nearest wall. do not be surprised when he takes this opportunity to blindside you with praise, directly into your ear, with that fatally smooth voice of his. and do NAWT be surprised when he pulls back and says, “why am i not being made out with?” with a dumb little smile. it brings him a lot of joy to see you squirm.

you don’t even have a saving grace here. this man is ruthless, he’s gonna do this to you literally whenever he wants, and he won’t even let you look away, let alone run away, so find joy in the monster you have created.

asmo

listen. unless you are genuinely empty headed, there is absolutely no way you did this on accident.

he wasn’t even doing anything out of character either, it was the middle of self-care night, he was putting moisturizer on your face for you, and he went, “you’re even cuter up close,” which is a normal, tame thing for him to say.

so unless you just have uncontrollable knee-jerk reactions, no way did you say, “so make out with me then,” to this man, by accident.

you’re lucky he has some knowledge of the fact that you sometimes say things that aren’t smart, so he didn’t just immediately jump on you; however, you are by no means in the Clear.

you blinked and he was nose to nose with you and basically in your lap. now you have to deal with his wandering hands while you try and explain yourself—that is, if you can even overcome how flustered you are, which you probably can’t. luckily, he knows you probably didn’t mean it, but he’s still asmo, so he takes it upon himself to be respectfully heinous like the gentleman he is.

so when he somehow manages to get even closer to you and says, “honey, you should really get a handle on those impulses of yours, unless you plan on following through,” like the bastard he is, know that from that point forward, whatever happens is on you.

here is another man with whom you have no saving grace; now that you’ve given him the idea that he can be more explicit with you,,, well.

beel

you’re a heathen. why would you do something like this. well, you know what, maybe you aren’t that much of a heathen, considering that you did bake cookies for him. that was really sweet of you, so he thanked you and complimented your skill, like a regular person.

so why, exactly, did you say, “i only accept thanks in the form of kisses, preferably with tongue,” ? something is genuinely not right with you.

now you have this man standing there, confused and red in the face. he’s trying to do the math, and nothing is adding up. like, it’s definitely doable, he can definitely do that, but, like, why would you make this request so suddenly?

this is probably the only instance in which you can coherently say, “i was kidding, you don’t actually have to do that,” and it almost doesn’t work.

you absolutely should not have been leaning against the counter because now he’s standing in front of you, and you have nowhere to run.

however, the thing about beel is that he is someone who flusters people without meaning to, so he has no idea of the effect that his, “are you sure?” has on you.

luckily, you’re still mostly coherent because you know that beel isn’t heinous like his brothers, so you manage to tell him that he doesn’t have to kiss you if he doesn’t want to because you were kidding.

you have every right to be surprised when, all of a sudden, you’re sitting on the counter, and he says, “why do you think i don’t want to?”

do you have a saving grace with this man? kind of. he would never say what you said or something similar, but the next time he compliments you and you choose to be normal and say, “thank you,” he’s gonna ask if he should kiss you, so try not to collapse.

belphie

now. he isn’t the Worst Person you could’ve done this with. but by god you are out of your mind.

your first mistake was choosing to lie down next to him, not because you had plans to be a menace, but because he is always a menace and has a thing for reminding you, which he can do more easily when you’re in proximity to him.

so when he said, out of nowhere, “are you ticklish?” you should’ve just rolled away, which wouldn’t have worked, but it would have been less chaotic then saying, “you are legally required to make out with me before you try and find out.”

you said it so casually that he was almost stunned into staying still, but his recovery time was excellent.

the next thing you knew, you were laying underneath a very smug, very menacing man, who seemed entirely too prepared to listen to what you had to say for once.

“legally?”

okay, so, maybe you should’ve chosen your words more carefully, but he was seconds away from tickling you, so you didn’t exactly have time to defend yourself. you can never backtrack with belphie anyway, so it makes sense that you went headlong into your claim, telling him that yes, this is, in fact, the law of the land.

“i was never one to pay attention to the law, but since you’re being so insistent, i guess i don’t really have a choice—”

leave it to him to pretend like you’re a burden as if he isn’t literally head over heels in love with you like everyone else fond of you. bastard.

there is absolutely nothing to save you from this man. he isn’t tactful enough to wait for an opportunity to do this to you, like satan or lucifer, so expect to be Just Sitting There when he tells you that you’re required to make out with him right this instant—it’s the law.

#obey me!#obey me #obey me headcanons #obey me imagines #obey me lucifer #obey me mammon #obey me levi #obey me leviathan #obey me satan #obey me asmo #obey me asmodeus #obey me beel #obey me beelzebub #obey me belphie #obey me belphegor

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takamikeiigos · 3 years

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• though keigo tends to be loud, seemingly carefree, and outgoing, he's convinced himself that hero work is his #1 priority and he has zero time to be getting all up in a tizzy about feelings

• this man probably doesn't even know what a long, meaningful hug feels like. but what does it matter because he's a hero, he doesn't have time to be mulling over that kinda stuff

• now don't get me wrong, keigo has all of the basic human wants and needs for love, affection, companionship, etc. but has managed to tuck those thoughts away deep in the back of his mind

• so he spends his free time alone watching movies by himself while eating takeout, or finding somewhere high on the skyline to perch upon while the breeze caresses him and gives him comfort while he's deep in his thoughts

• when it comes to his avian characteristics and needs, he knows many people don't understand so he tends to them himself

• long tiresome processes of preening his own wings, often getting aggravated when he can't reach a spot or can't get certain feathers to lay flat

• or when it's that time of the season and he continuously chooses to go through his ruts alone because he hasn't allowed himself time to slow down and properly take care of it, because he grew up too fast and exploring his own wants and needs was never an option

• let's talk about keigo nesting during a rut bc of pure instinct but suddenly coming to the harsh reality that he has no one to share it with

• ouch

• imagine the first time he meets you

• you think he's probably the most loud and obnoxious motherfucker you've ever met but he grows on you over time

• its only after spending a bit of time by his side that you realize little things about him that kinda break your heart

• he smiles and jokes around a lot, but when you catch him deep in thought or slipping you notice the vacant stares that make him seem far, far away

• or the fact that he doesn't touch people unless they prompt first, whether it's a high five or a pat on the shoulder, but his hands mostly remain in his pockets or by his sides otherwise

• so it breaks your heart even more when you go to give him a quick hug before checking out for the day and he completely tenses up, clearly not sure how to react

• it occupies most of your thoughts that night, before it finally dawns on you that keigo didn't reciprocate because he didn't know how to (not literally, of course)

• from then on you touch him more often - like gently putting your hand on his shoulder when you're reaching over him, or placing your hand on the small of his back when moving around him

• over-all you're in his space more, always standing a few inches closer so your shoulders touch or your hands brush

• but let's talk about that one time you both go on a mission together and keigo gets knocked around a lil bit

• you're finally able to catch up to him and the idiot is standing there covered in bruises, feathers missing and his hero outfit almost torn to shreds, and he has the audacity to smile at you like he didn't just get knocked into next week

• he tenses again when you run up to him and pull him into a frantic hug, worry ebbing from your entire being but grateful that he's still standing and alive

• but the exhaustion finally catches up to him and its then that his wall comes crashing down, his arms wrapping around you like he's clinging to you for dear life, and his head is resting on your shoulder, coming free of all those heavy thoughts he's been carrying with him

• things slowly change after that

• months later you two end up together, like two pieces of a puzzle that were lost but finally found, a relief of a perfect fit

• he texts you constantly - whether it's of things that remind him of you, or a picture of a cat he saw while on patrols, or even just to let you know you mean the world to him

• when you’re both together he almost always ends up being the one to initiate physical contact now, staying close in your space and his hand always rest against you

• on nights after a long day of patrolling, he'll come over and you'll put a movie on, cuddling close together on the couch while eating the most unhealthy junk food you could find to take the edge off

• you catch him smiling to himself one of those times, and when you look at him curiously, he shakes his head and laughs quietly

• "'s nothing baby bird, just nice to finally have someone to do this with"

• on another tiresome evening of patrolling, he flies through your bedroom window (you always leave it unlocked and open for him) and perches on your windowsill

• you can instantly tell something is bothering him by the way he's holding himself, his wings twitching and his body tense

• so you beckon him to come sit on your bed with you, thinking maybe a back rub will ease the tension. but when he finally sits down in front of you, the disarray of tangled feathers is the answer to your unasked questions

• you tell him to relax and he does, but when you hesitantly run your fingers against his feathers he nearly jumps out of his skin

• you pull your hand away as if it was burned and when you ask if you accidentally hurt him, he flushes and avoids eye contact

• "no! no, you didn't hurt me. they're just.. sensitive. 'm just not used to people touching them like that. but it.. it feels good"

• so you continue running your fingers through his feathers gently, making sure they're all in place and pulling the loose ones from his wings

• he’s all breathy sighs underneath your hands and you swear you hear him cooing every once in a while and your heart melts at the amount of intimacy and trust

• it turns into a ritual after rough days, and neither of you mind it

《《 NSFW 》》

• so look, i’m not saying keigo is a virgin but we're gonna keep going with this little needy & touch starved trend we got going. to each their own

• keigo loves being touched, but he also loves touching you

• i’m talking always pressing up against you when you’re both alone, face nuzzled in your neck while biting and licking, hands on your hips and squeezing

• clinging to you when you’re about to get out of bed, or sneaking into the shower with you bc he misses your warmth and is craving some skin on skin contact, his head nuzzled into your shoulder and his arms wrapped around you from behind

• tbh he’s probably still half asleep as he does this, too. you basically have him completely limp in your arms when you turn to start scrubbing his hair

• i’m getting a little off topic, huh?

• he’s always trying to get your attention, especially when he knows you’re busy

• he’s almost always breathless when things get hot and heavy, nearly falling apart over a make-out session

• but when you finally get him out of his clothes and on the bed where you want him, the experience is one you want to relive forever

• he’s got this wonton facial expression, chest flushed and wings puffed out, lips parted with unspoken pleas as you touch him

• the first time you even touch his dick he nearly loses it, head tossed back and fingers gripping the sheets

• "fuck.. fuck that feels so good dove, please don't stop"

• he’s so sensitive, his skin feels like it might burst into flames because of how worked-up he's getting

• the sight of him falling apart from a simple hand job is a sight to see, something you weren't expecting to get you going but it is

• you stroke him slow, your grip just loose enough where he ends up having to work for it, all the while you're gauging his expressions

• keigo is a talker, loud and completely unashamed of the filth pouring from his lips as he fucks up into your fist, his jaw slack and his brown pinched in pleasure and concentration

• "please baby, right there. god, you feel so fucking good, please don't stop. fuuuuck"

• when you decide to touch his wings out of sheer curiosity, you weren't expecting to his reaction to turn you on as much as it did

• keigo arching off the bed with a broken "f-fuck!", yanking you forward into a harsh kiss as he moans broken please and appraisals into your mouth, whining

• he finally comes in thick spurts over your hand, his hips stuttering as he thrusts upward to milk the final drops of his come, chest heaving and breathy pants falling against your lips, his hands tangled in your hair

• touch starved, needy, and sensitive

don't get me started on my man's going into a rut. whoo, good stuff.

sorry this is so long!! i got very carried away once i got into it.

if anyone wants to request anything, please do?? i would love that, especially since I'm trying to learn more about this beautiful bird-boy. nonetheless i hope y'all enjoyed!!

♡ ky

#keigo takami #bnha hawks #bnha keigo takami #mha hawks #mha keigo takami #hawks headcanons #keigo takami headcanons #hawks x reader #keigo takami x reader #takamikeiigos #ky writes #headcanons #bnha #hawks

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its-deputy-caleb · 3 years

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hello! can i have some touch starved micah with a gentle and caring fem or gn reader?? thank you :))

omg yess anon, u can have touch starved micah any day! now ngl its like 3AM and i decided to write these after such a long day so this probs makes no sense and i didn't like the way they turned out at all so i might fix it up later

but still please enjoy this mess and a friendly reminder to anyone that reads this that my rdr requests are still open (but dw there's still more to come) i'm just really enjoying getting back into red dead!!

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It had been a relatively long night for Micah, or so you’d noticed as you watched him leaning against a tree for almost the entire afternoon and long into the night, just sharpening his knife and mumbling under his breath.

You knew something was bothering him and apart of you couldn’t help but be a little worried and it wasn’t because of the robbery you have with him the next day. No, deep down you had a soft spot for him.

But Micah Bell had his walls up high even around someone like you who is one of the few people he considers a friend. Talking to him, little alone approaching him is more of a challenge than a bet in five finger fillet and you had an inkling that he’d appreciate being alone.

So with a heavy sigh you stood from your place at the campfire, bid the last few remaining members a goodnight and headed towards your tent— there needed to be one of you with at least four hours of sleep, otherwise you’d never be able to pull off this robbery.

As you turned around to close the flaps in your tent, you couldn’t help but notice Micah’s gaze directed at you and it had been since you stood to leave. When your eyes met his own and you gave a soft smile he immediately turned his attention back to the knife and whetstone in his hand, hiding how flustered he was under the brim of his hat.

You waved goodnight to him but of course he didn’t see it, he wouldn’t dare look your way until he knew for certain that you wouldn’t catch him doing so. In all the time you’ve gotten to know Micah, you’ve seen him argue, fight, yell and even flirt with the gang members and total strangers but you’ve never seen him flustered or nervous quite like the way he is with you.

The thought makes you giggle as you settle into bed, you could only guess that he likes you but to say that you hate the idea would be a lie.

The next morning you were walking through camp with a cup of coffee in your hand as you went to find Micah and prepare for the coach that was coming in from Annesburg. It wasn’t difficult to find him since he was still leaning against the tree, the only real point of difference was his slightly slumped posture and obvious bags under his eyes.

“Here, I thought you might want this after last night.”

He stares numbly at the cup of coffee you’re holding out for him to take. He seems almost startled out of his thoughts at the first person that’s actually approached him in hours.

“I don’t like coffee.”

“—Half of its filled with whiskey.”

One of Micah’s typical sly smirks comes to rest on his face, one that’s laced with over confidence so that he can put his walls up higher and keep everyone thinking that he’s not trying to downplay whatever’s bothering him.

“You know me too well, sweetheart.”

However, you’re not just anyone and happen to see straight through his charms. When you place the cup in his hand you instantly notice the way he seems to tense up when your hand lightly brushes his. You couldn’t help but think the soft sound that left him was, for lack of a better word...cute.

His hand instinctively reaches forward into you more before pulling away to fiddle with the cup.

“Common now, I need you feeling sharp for this robbery and its a long ride to Annesburg from here.”

The tension leaves him when he realises you’re not going to push for answers or make a scene and he’s clearly comforted by the small smile you’re giving him.

The robbery as a whole goes fairly smooth. The coach guards were easy to take down with there being only three of them plus a driver. The issue arrived when the law showed up and there was a hell of a lot more than three.

The coach had been flipped at this point, the horses well and truely bolted but it offered the cover you needed in order to take out the flock of lawman.

Standing beside you, you can’t help notice how Micah seems completely out of it. You’ve seen him at his best, just how well he can shoot during a gunfight. Hell at Blackwater you saw him take out at least twenty pinkertons before you all even made it off the boat. No, the Micah standing beside you could barely even aim straight.

Eventually, the coast is clear— it took a while but the shooting finally stopped and left only silence as Micah went over to crack open the safe containing the payroll.

“Oh shit—“

Before you know what you’re doing, you take three quick steps forward and push Micah as hard as you can against his side. He hits the ground with a loud thud but you don’t stop to think about it as you fire your revolver at the lawman who’d managed to sneak up on you.

You don’t take your finger off the trigger until there’s no more bullets left in the chamber and the lawman is well and truly on the floor. You holster your revolver before turning around and offering an arm out for Micah to take, who is still sitting in the dirt with a stunned look on his face.

“Are you alright?”

You gently hoist him up and squeeze at his hand in hopes that he’ll understand just how worried you are about him right now.

Micah doesn’t give you a verbal response, instead choosing to groan but you didn’t mind, you suspect that his ego took more bullets than the lawman had. That didn’t mean you didn’t miss the way his hand squeezed yours back tightly.

“Oh Jesus, you’re bleeding!”

It seems Micah himself hadn’t even noticed the vibrant red stain of blood on his already dirty white pants.

“It’s just a graze, ain’t nothing to worry about.”

Unfortunately you don’t have time to argue with him about as he’s already loading up the cash onto Baylock before saddling up himself.

“Fine, but yer letting me patch you up when he get back to camp.”

To your surprise Micah actually follows you to your tent so you can at least bandage and disinfect the wound but that doesn’t mean he isn’t gonna put up a fuss. It takes you a good ten minutes just to get his pants off so you could clean it and it takes you even longer to place your hands anywhere near him.

“I can wrap my own damned bullet wound!”

You stare at him with an eyebrow raised, watching as he has an internal battle with himself on whether to push you away like he does everyone else, or to cave and let you in.

“Alright then, I’ll leave you to it.”

You decide to call his bluff, placing the bandages on the crate beside your bed before dusting yourself off and standing to leave the tent, only to be stopped by a hand on your wrist. Finally, you see something snap inside him and he sighs, almost defeatedly.

“Please stay…”

You pick the bandages and the old rag back up and sit back down on the edge of the cot. He jumps slightly when your hand is placed on the outside of his upper thigh, just under where the graze has torn the skin.

“Relax Micah, it’s okay.”

Micah is staring up at you with hopeful eyes as he leans on his elbows on the cot. You give him a reassuring smile but he only starts to really relax when your hand moves in slow circles against his thigh.

After the old rag has been drenched in whiskey you, offer him an apology before placing it over the wound to disinfect it. Micah hisses through his teeth and falls flat against the cot, trying not to bite his tongue off at the sharp burning feeling that’s travelling up his leg.

When his wound has been properly cleaned and bandaged, you lean forward and take his chin in your hand and guide him to look at you.

“Now was that so bad?”

Your eyes stare into his icy blue ones and you notice just how tired he seems. You decide to make a decision before second guessing yourself and lay down next to him on the cot that’s too small for the two of you to really fit on it.

Nevertheless your arms come to wrap around him in a tight hug. He tenses again but only for a moment before melting into you, exhausting clearly winning out.

Your hand comes to tangle in his hair and gently massage his scalp before placing a soft kiss to his forehead.

“Is this why you’ve been acting so off recently?”

Micah nods into your shoulder, more relaxed than ever now that he’s receiving the affection and intimacy he’s been craving for months now. He’ll probably beat himself up later over a bottle of whiskey for being so needy, but right now he couldn’t care less.

“Micah, when was the last time you had a hug?”

Your question is soft, non judgemental as you gently detangle his hair from where there are small knots. This time, there’s no answer and he only sinks further into your arms around him, as if he’s trying to literally avoid the question.

It doesn’t take a genius however to guess how long its been.

“Hey its alright, it doesn’t have to be like that anymore.”

His head comes up from your shoulder instantly, a desperate and hopeful look in his eyes. Your noses are almost touching and you can feel his slightly shaky breathe as he attempts to calm his nerves.

You lean forward slowly and place a soft kiss to lips, feeling him smile against you. His moustache manages to tickle his top lip and you can’t help but giggle which only makes the two of you smile more.

That night, Micah finally gets a good night’s rest with his head resting upon your shoulder. He’s lulled off by your hand rubbing slow circles into the back of his neck and soft but frequent forehead kisses.

He’s just about to doze off into a peaceful sleep when he feels you whisper against his skin,

“I love you Micah, just relax and get some sleep now”

The next morning he’ll wake up from one of the best sleeps he’s had in a long time knowing you held him all night.

#touch starved micah is my fav #soft rat 🥺🥺🥺#but im also so tired and this is a whole mess #this isn't even remotely edited #so i apologise #micah bell #micah bell x reader #micah bell imagine #rdr2 writing #rdr2 headcanons #rdr2 #red dead redemption 2

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rendevousz · 3 years

Text

not a lonely birthday

teen!actress!reader x platonic!jeremy renner

brief reader x marvel cast

req by @maximeevansblog : The reader (me ) is dating jeremy renner its the readers birtday, and jeremy renner spoiling her, taking to the hair salon and to the nail salon , and the trows a party for her, and he asks her to marry him, and a couple months later the reader is asked to been on say yes to the dress and alot of fluff please (i'm so sorry i couldn't write your exact request. i added the other cast too but it's still mainly jeremy renner so i hope you enjoy this still)

summary: you thought you were gonna have to spend your birthday alone but jeremy had other plans.

word count: 3296

note: i told her i couldn't really write romance because my blog is mainly teen!reader and she said i could just turn it into an x teen!reader so i did. i mean, i can write a non teen!reader but it probably won't be anytime soon so i'm not taking requests that aren't x teen!reader as of now <33

"are you sure you'll be okay?"

"yes, mum, i'll be fine here. i've been doing fine for the past two and a half months, what's another week without you guys gonna do to me?" you told your mother on the phone, rolling your eyes at her excessive, unnecessary worrying.

"we're so sorry about this, sweetheart," you heard your dad speak and you figured he must've been listening the whole time. your mum must've had it on speaker since the beginning of the phone call.

"you shouldn't have to spend your birthday all alone. i promise we'll make it up to you, honey." your mother spoke again and you groaned. "i keep telling you that it's fine. and what do you take me for, a loner? i've got the others here, mum, i'll be fine." you told her, a smile ghosting over your lips at how concerned she is of you.

your birthday was coming in two days and having a whole movie to film meant that you weren't allowed to leave the country for just a weekend to celebrate it with your family. so, they worked around your schedule and planned a trip to visit. unfortunately, your idiot of a brother managed to get himself into a skating accident and had to be hospitalised, affecting their whole plan of coming to celebrate your 18th birthday with you. well, not on the day of your birthday, at least.

"i'll make sure sarah'll bring you out to celebrate, okay? i'm so sorry about this, y/n." you could practically hear the pout in her voice and you held back the urge to tell her off for profusely apologising, you didn't want to receive a beating when she finally arrives here.

"i'll be fine, mum," you whined. "as i said, i'll be filming on my birthday too so i'll at least be with the cast then. it's never a dull day with them. and i'll be waiting for your gift from sarah on my birthday." you teased her. you knew she had a habit of getting birthday gifts way too early. for once, she was grateful for that because she had given sarah—your manager and also a family friend— your birthday present for her to safe-keep in case anything like this happened and she couldn't give it to you on your birthday.

"i'll give you permission to whack your brother once we come." your dad tells you seriously and you laughed. "thanks, dad. i'll be sure to remember it. anyways, i have to get back on set soon. i'll talk to you guys when i can?"

"of course, honey. have fun on set!" your parents bid you goodbye and you hung up with an adoring smile on your face. you missed your family and having been able to hear your parents' voices for a mere five minutes was enough to cure it for even just a little bit. sure, you were disappointed that you weren't going to get to spend your birthday with them but spending it doing what you love—acting— with the people, aside from your family and friends from home, that you love—the cast— didn't sound so bad.

"i'm so sorry about this, darling." you heard someone say, effectively breaking your train of thoughts. you turned to the source of the voice, meeting the hazel eyes of your manager and long-time family friend, sarah. she pulls you in for a hug that you groaned into but still returned. you rolled your eyes playfully when she let go. "i'm not upset, sarah."

"i know. but you're disappointed." she says softly, fixing your costume after the hug messed it up a little. "maybe i am, but it doesn't matter. i chose this life so technically i brought all of this upon myself. i signed up to have a normal life stripped away from me." you told her honestly, internally cringing because you hadn't meant to get that deep.

"y/n," her hands rested on both of your shoulders and she looks down at you with that stern mum glare she'd give you whenever you were being a little troublemaker. she was practically your second mum, having promised your own that she'd take care of you whenever you had to travel for filming.

"i know, i know, i'm sorry. i didn't mean it in a bad way. i love my job but it sucks that i have to be far away from family, you know?" you sighed. "i understand, darling. it's hard but hey, i'll be with you the whole day, okay? we'll go out and have a nice girl's day out together, do whatever you want. that sound nice to you?" she places a gentle hand against your skin, careful not to rub the fake dirt and wound makeup on your face.

"that sounds great, sarah. i have only a half day of filming that day, right?" you ask her, knowing she remembers your schedule better than you yourself do. "yup. anyways, they need you on set 3. get out there and make me proud, darling."

"and....cut!" the director called out and you dramatically dropped limp against the wire harness attached to your body, the wires holding up your weight so you didn't drop down to the floor but also didn't have to remain standing on your own.

you heard sebastian laughing, him being the closest to you in the scene you had just filmed. "you tired, y/n/n?" evans chuckled as he walked towards where you and seb were standing. "yeah, i just wanna sleep right now." you told them, standing up on your own when a crew member wanted to get your harness off.

"well, at least you get to rest now. you're done for the day right?" seb asked, the three of you now walking to the snack table together. "yeah but sarah wanted to take me out so maybe not rest but i'll get to relax. that's good enough," you say, peeling off a banana and taking a bite while the two men drank some water.

"she's taking you out later today? is there a special occasion?" chris asked and you smiled at him. "nah, nothing much. she just thought i've been stressed lately." you lied. you didn't want to seem attention-seeking for telling chris and sebastian that it was your birthday so you settled on a little lie.

"she's not wrong. you have been working hard and you deserve a relaxing evening off work." seb agreed.

"oh she's walking over here right now. are you going now?" chris asked, eyes trained behind you as he watched sarah coming closer. you turned around, meeting her frown-etched face and you blinked profusely in confusion. "i thought we're going in two hours?"

"y/n, i'm so sorry. some stuff came up and i have last minute errands to run all day," she told you, offering a guilty expression when your face dropped slightly. "oh.. i– um, yeah, it's fine."

"are you sure it's fine? i promised you though," she frowned. "it's fine, i know you have a lot to handle and it's totally fine if we don't go out today. i'll just take a nap and be on netflix all day, i guess." you joked but sarah didn't laugh. "sarah, it's fine. you know i've been wanting to catch up on a list of shows. when else will i be able to do this?" you assured her, trying to mask your disappointment.

"i have to go now. i'll make it up to you, darling, i promise." she gave you a hug before running off somewhere. you felt bad for her because she probably had to be running here and there all day but it didn't change that you were disappointed. maybe you really did deserve this for choosing this life.

"hey kiddo," you felt someone ruffle your hair and you were almost going to go off on them for doing that before remembering you had just finished your last scene for the day. an arm rested over your shoulder and you looked up to see jeremy taking over sarah's previous spot.

"um excuse me? do we not exist?" chris joked when jeremy didn't greet him nor seb. jeremy rolled his eyes at them, turning back to look down at you. "you did great today, kiddo." he complimented and you smiled, thanking him.

"wow okay, i guess we really don't exist, huh? c'mon seb, let's go somewhere else where people appreciate our presence." evans sassed, glaring at you two as both men strutted away.

"good riddance," jeremy said, dropping his arm so that you two were now face to face. "happy birthday, y/n." he says, handing you a little bronze coloured box. you gasped as you took it in your hands.

"how'd you know it was my birthday?" you asked him, eyes wide in surprise. "of course i know your birthday, kiddo. after all, you are my favourite co-star." he grins, gesturing for you to open the box.

you did and your hand immediately flew to cover your mouth in shock. "jeremy! you didn't!" you gently took out the necklace from the box, examining it closely. the charm was in the shape of your favourite animal and the chain was gold. this must've costed him a fortune.

"jeremy, you didn't have to!" you exclaimed, pouting at him to prevent yourself from bursting into tears right then and there. "kiddo, i love you a lot, how could i not?"

playing clint's adopted, eldest daughter in the films, as well as a member of the avengers, you and jeremy worked together a lot. he helped you a lot with practicing your lines and emotions for specific scenes and you bonded over so many things you two had in common. even off set jeremy still acted like your father so practically everyone knew how close you two were. if sarah is considered your second mum, you'd say jeremy is your second dad.

"so i heard sarah bailed on your birthday date today," he says as he helped you put on the necklace, smiling fondly when you looked down at it happily. "thanks a lot, jeremy. you really didn't have to," you hugged him tight, the man chuckling as he hugged you back.

"and sarah didn't bail. she just has errands to run all day. can't blame her, she's a busy woman." you told him. "yeah yeah, anyways, how 'bout i take you out instead? a birthday lunch and a day out with your favourite cast mate?" he wiggles his eyebrows at you, a smirk playing on his lips.

"you don't have anymore scenes to shoot?" you ask. "i do but i have plenty of time before then." he replies. you agreed happily and he tells you to meet him outside the set in an hour so you two could change out of your costumes.

"you ready for the best day ever, kiddo?" jeremy asks as you entered the passenger seat. "best day ever? then shouldn't we invite the rest?" you teased, buckling your seatbelt. "hey! i'm pretty fun too!"

you chuckled at his childishness. "i'm kidding, you are fun. now let's go already, i'm starving." you complained and he started the engine, letting you play whatever songs you wanted as background to your small talk.

you had lunch first at your favourite restaurant but not before you two had a debate of whether you were allowed to because you were supposed to be on a diet during the length of the movie shooting and him ultimately going 'to hell with that diet, it's your special day' and then dragging you in. after that, he said he had a surprise for you and told you to just get in the car.

when he finally stopped somewhere, you realised it was a pretty well known hair salon in town and you tilted your head in confusion. why would he bring you here?

"you said you wanted to dye your hair, didn't you? let's do it." he says nonchalantly, unbuckling his seatbelt before you both exited the car. "are you crazy? we're still in the middle of filming!" you exclaim in disbelief. this man was crazy.

"yeah but it's not like they can't just get a wig of your current hair and use that for the rest of the filming. scar and lizzie wear wigs all the time, you can too. now let's go dye that stupid colour you want!" he cheers, tugging you along with him by your wrist, into the salon. you chuckled at his antics, letting him drag you.

the next hour or two was spent with you worrying that your parents would kill you for this, or worse, anthony or joe. you knew it would be a meltdown for them if you came back with your hair a completely different colour.

jeremy assured you that the russos, as well as your parents, would not get mad at this but you were pretty sure you'd get an earful from both pairs. you made him promise that he would talk to both parties that he was the one who convinced you to do this. but once your hair was done, all worries flew out the window as you admired your new hair.

"you look great, kiddo. this colour looks good on you." he looks at you with a fond smile, trying to resist the urge to ruffle your newly done hair but failing. you pouted at him when he did so, reaching up to fix it again. "sorry, y/n/n, couldn't resist," he states, pinching your cheek.

"alright, next stop now, let's go!" he pulls you by the wrist once again and you let him, used to him doing this already. the next time he stopped, you damn right almost had another heart attack because again, this man was crazy.

he did not just bring you to a nail place. surely he isn't about to let you get your nails done, right? the russos would have your head and his too if you were to get them done and casually get back to the studio.

"no." you said firmly, crossing your arms over your chest as you stayed seated in the passenger seat. "c'mon, y/n/n," he whined, throwing a tantrum outside the car door as he tried to get you to leave the car.

"no, jeremy, they'll literally send me back here to get it off because in case you forgot, in all my scenes, i don't have fancy nails." you reasoned, noticing that jeremy has now moved to your side of the car and the passenger seat door has now been opened, the man continuing to make a fuss closer to you now.

"no they will not, i'll make sure they don't. c'mon kiddo, it's your birthday, let's have a little fun!" he says but you were still unsure about the whole thing. "i don't know.."

"okay fine i guess i'll tell you this now. they didn't want to tell you until later today because they wanted it to be your kinda birthday present but your avenger suit has changed. it's not like the one in the last movie, it's got gloves now! and the rest of your scenes excluding the last few ones are all in your superhero suit right?" your eyes widened at this new information, a smile growing on your lips.

"wait, for real? are you sure they're not just fingerless gloves?" he smiles down at you. "yeah. i planned this day well, okay? put some trust in me, geez," he sassed, moving out of your way as you finally exited the car.

"this better not be a joke, renner, because if it is, i'll have your head." you threatened jokingly. "yeah, yeah. oh also, can you just pretend to be shocked when they tell you about your suit upgrade? because i really wasn't supposed to tell you this." he scratched the back of his head awkwardly as you walked two walked into the nail salon.

the entire time, he awkwardly sat at the side, waiting for you to be done. when you were though, he quickly got up, as if he had been restless sitting down the whole time.

"they're pretty," he says as you walked back to his car. "yeah, i really like them. haven't had my nails done in a long time." you replied, getting in the car and waiting for jeremy to get in on his side. once he did, he immediately started the engine and started driving back to the set where he had to continue shooting and where you knew sarah would be waiting for you.

it was after many different topics and finally arriving outside the set did you decide to get a little emotional. "hey, i just wanna say thanks for today. i thought i was gonna spend the day alone watching netflix all day like some loser but you made this day really enjoyable. you have no idea how much this really means to me, thank you so much jeremy. i love you." you pouted at him, trying not to cry. "aw kiddo, of course. you're an important person to me. couldn't let you be a loser on your special day," he teases, bringing you into a hug where he didn't miss his chance to ruffle your hair.

once you let go, he kept an arm around your shoulder as you both walked in. he opened the door for you both and you almost jumped in place.

"HAPPY BIRTHDAY!"

your jaw dropped at the sight in front you. every single one of your co-stars, along with some crew members were wearing party hats holding up a banner that said 'HAPPY BIRTHDAY, Y/N'. sarah was in the middle, holding a huge birthday cake with a smile on her face. you slowly walked towards her, hand over your mouth in shock.

sarah gave the cake over to robert before opening her arms up for you. you gave her a tight hug. "you didn't have to do all this," you say, letting go of her. "jeremy and i planned this right when your mother called beforehand and told me they couldn't come in time." she explained.

you turned to jeremy who had been standing next to you the whole time, giving him another hug which he happily accepted. "you guys didn't have to." you told them, trying not to cry at the thought that these people loved you enough to do this for you.

"but we wanted to. and the rest wanted to join in too. now before you start bawling your eyes out, let's get this party started!" he cheered.

"but before that, make a wish, kiddo." robert tells you after evans finished lighting up all the candles. you closed your eyes, making a wish and blowing them all out. everyone cheered before walking away to grab food or to talk to others. or in your cast mates' cases, fighting over who gets to give you your present first.

"you knew it was my birthday!" you exclaimed when you locked eyes with evans, who was in the middle of a brawl with both mackie and robert. he laughed out loud. "yeah! i did! your lie couldn't fool me, child!" he says dramatically, before being pushed aside by robert.

you laughed as they continued to fight right in front of you about who you love more and therefore getting to be first to give you their gift. they even managed to slip in a few compliments about your new hair, while they were literally fighting. you watched in glee, realising that even if your biological family couldn't make it for your special day, you still had a second one to make it special.

taglist <3

@amourtentiaa @rqmanoff @abitofeverythinggg @andreasworlsboring101 @cay-writes-fan-fiction514 @teenwonder @sevenmorningstars @fleurlovesbucky

#marvel cast x reader #marvel x teen!reader #marvel cast x teen!reader #jeremy renner x reader #jeremy renner x teen!reader #x teen!reader #chris evans x teen!reader #sebastian stan x teen!reader #avengers x teen!reader #avengers x reader

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spacedikut · 4 years

Text

starstruck ; spencer reid

pairing: spencer reid (criminal minds) x f!reader

summary: “Can I request some age gap Spencer x reader. Maybe he’s nervous about approaching her for a relationship bc she’s younger, but he’s so goofy for her it’s he’s in love obvious. Pretty pls 🥺💕” 5222 words

a/n: i didn’t specify ages cause i wasn’t sure what people would be comfortable with so i just mentioned an age gap and leave the rest up to you!! i would happily date someone twice my age but i also have daddy issues so :)

masterlist

The day has finally arrived.

Mollie can call you a nerd all she wants, but you know the second she lays eyes on Derek Morgan or Emily Prentiss she’ll change her tune.

This event has been in the university’s calendar since the beginning of the semester. At least two members of the FBI Behavioural Analysis Unit were promised to give a talk about their department, even taking you through a solved case like an interactive documentary, to encourage students to consider joining the academy post-graduation. There was whispers they’d even stick around after to answer some questions.

Your other friend, Jen, the one that understands your excitement, wrote your names down for tickets immediately. You’ve had a countdown on your phone ever since.

“They’ve announced a last-minute guest,” She beams, just as giddy as you. You’re wasting time at the coffee house near the auditorium, waiting for Mollie to arrive.

“Oh, really? Who?”

“Doctor Spencer Reid.”

You almost drop your cookie in shock and stare at her, pupils blown.

“You’re a big fan?” She smirks.

As nonchalantly as you can, you lean back in your chair, “I’m a fan of his work, yes.”

“Oh, his work?”

“Don’t start.”

“I bet you love his work.”

“He’s well-versed and his papers are super interesting-“

“His papers are super interesting-“

“You are a child.”

Just then, Mollie appears, checking her watch. You wish you could kiss her in thanks for saving you from the teasing that would likely never end. “We’re gonna be late for your morbid seminar if you two don’t stop bickering.”

Jen downs the rest of her drink, you shove the last of the cookie in your mouth. Mollie watches your excitement in amusement – your heart starts pumping, whole body buzzing, the same nervousness you felt when you were a preteen right before your first ever One Direction concert. It’s the kind of nervousness that makes your palms sweaty.

Is it evolution or devolution to go from sweating over One Direction to sweating over FBI profilers?

+++

The seminar goes on for an hour, including the questions people ask throughout. It’s everything you could’ve asked for, entertaining and so, so informative and although you weren’t considering joining the FBI before, suddenly it’s all you can think about. Guest speakers have that affect, don’t they? They make you wonder if you should drastically change everything you’ve been planning.

Even Mollie, who you had to threaten to tag along, ended up enjoying herself. “Maybe I learnt a thing or two,” She’d said, rolling her eyes playfully.

You and your friends are some of the last to leave. There’s quite the bustling outside, which you assume is just post-seminar chatter, but you and Jen falter in your steps when you see the exact profilers that had been onstage several minutes ago in front of you, happily interacting and talking to fellow students.

“Oh, man,” Jen whispers, her and Mollie making eye contact across you. “I have to see if I can talk to Emily.”

Mollie encourages her with a frantic, “Go! Go!” while you’re rooted in place. Mollie jabs you with a pointed nail, “You in there, Y/N? I’m sure you have loads of questions for them-“

You stutter and shake your head, “N-no. I’m good. You can try and hit on Derek, if you want.”

You give a half-attempt at a smile, barely lifting the corners of your lips. Mollie recognises that look. She wants to stay with you, check you’re not too overwhelmed, but you shoo her away and send her towards Derek. You breathe a sigh of relief – you’ve been friends with her long enough that she knows when you need space.

There’s something about seeing people you admire so abruptly that totally throws you for a loop. All you had prepared for was seeing them from afar and subsequently talking about it forever, but nothing beyond that. In some circumstances, it’d be a pleasant surprise, but for someone that struggles around strangers and especially around people as admirable as profilers, you are not mentally prepared for this and have therefore shut down.

But then you see him.

He’s shuffling in place in the corner of the room, close to a large potted plant like it’s his only friend. He’s nibbling his lip as his eyes flutter around, never staying somewhere for longer than a second, looking increasingly uncomfortable.

Why is no one talking to him? He’s Spencer Reid.

There’s a couple of people surrounding Emily, fully entranced by whatever story she’s relaying, another few people around Derek, chortling at a joke he just made. Spencer glances between them and their audiences, and you can’t help but wonder why he isn’t right next to them, chatting away, too.

Does he not want to talk to anyone?

You should talk to him.

No. He probably wants to be alone.

Or what if he doesn’t and no one else is talking to him which means you can have a one-on-one conversation? What about that?

Are you insane?

…

You have to talk to him.

Before you can change your mind, you’re approaching him with a tight grip on the handle of your bag, pushing it higher up your shoulder. He spots you and makes eye contact just as you stop in front of him, and you notice he momentarily tightens his grip on his satchel.

Was this a bad idea?

“Hi,” You breathe, “I’m Y/N. A big fan.”

His eyes widen a fraction, which you don’t understand because why else would you be here, but he smiles nonetheless, “Hi, I’m, uh, Spencer Reid.”

“I know.”

“Yes, you know. That makes sense, because you were in the seminar. I saw you.”

Now you’re shocked. For as long as you can remember you never sit in the centre of a room, where most attention seems to go, so how did he-

“I-I always scan the room I’m in its.. it’s not a creepy thing, I swear. I’m not creepy.”

A laugh escapes you at that, making him visibly relax. “I don’t think you’re creepy. There was just.. a lot of people in there, so I’m surprised you remember my face.” You shrug.

I couldn’t forget such a beautiful face.

You don’t know what happens, but Spencer suddenly tenses up. His back straightens and he looks alarm, stiff.

Did he just think that? What.. why did he think that?

You wonder if you’ve said something wrong, so you try to change the topic.

“I-I have a question, if you don’t mind answering.”

Spencer nods with an of course, and when the question rolls off your tongue, his mind is still reeling from subconsciously calling you beautiful in his head. It’s not untrue, but it feels.. inappropriate. He doesn’t know why. But you are beautiful.

As he scans your face, now much closer than in the auditorium, he realises yeah, you are incredibly beautiful.

You wave a hand in front of his face, “Doctor Reid?”

“Sorry, yes, sorry. What are you studying?”

There’s a light in your eyes that Spencer recognises when you say, “Psychology.”

“Thought so.”

“You probably talk to a lot of psychology students. I-um. I almost went to Caltech,” Spencer raises an eyebrow, "After I read your dissertation, it really inspired me to look into it – your dissertation is incredible, by the way.”

Spencer smiles bashfully, a futile attempt to not allow the grin to overtake his face, and thanks you, “I appreciate it. Actually, I was sixteen when I wrote it.”

“Are you kidding me?!” Your eyes widen, “You’re insane! You’re amazing!”

The praise bursts from you, and his blushing face makes you oddly proud. On the other hand, Spencer feels like you’ve set him alight, his blood pumping loudly in his ears, as he’s unable to tear his eyes away from your smile.

He desperately needs to change the topic.

“To answer your question…”

Derek notices you two interacting across the room. Mollie sees him looking and hums, “Oh, that’s Y/N, my best friend. She really likes Spencer.”

Derek raises an eyebrow, “Looks like he really likes her.”

“Don’t tell her that. She’ll collapse.”

They both watch you for a second, Spencer flailing his arms as he explains, you eagerly adding to his rambling, asking a question here and exclaiming some kind of encouragement there. It’s sweet, Derek thinks.

“Hey..” Mollie begins, a scheming look in her eye, “We’re planning to hang out in the campus bar later. It’s open to all and the drinks are cheap. If you and Emily happen to find yourselves looking for something to do and you drag Spencer along.. I’m sure Y/N would like it.”

“I like the way you think,” Derek says, “I’ll see what I can do.”

+++

“She’s getting hit on. Again.” You giggle, gesturing for Jen to turn around and witness Mollie get your drinks paid for by a random guy.

She’s always been a people person – it’s saved you hundreds on nights out.

All Jen does is glance over her shoulder, scoff, then turn her sceptical eyes to you.

“I saw you and Spencer Reid.” She says, twinkling eyes. She’s trying not to look smug.

“I almost proposed to him.” You joke, taking your drink from Mollie with a mumbled thanks.

“Oh, I bet you did,” She laughs, “You two looked sooo good together.”

“Alright,” You slide a shot to each girl, “I know you’re making fun of me, but I’m taking that compliment and cherishing it. Spencer Reid is cute, what of it?!”

You clink the shot glasses with your friends and down them, all wincing at the taste and giggling at Jen when she takes a gulp of her cocktail to wash away the taste of straight vodka.

“How did talking to Derek and Emily go?”

And then Jen starts chattering away.

You miss the bar door opening behind you, But Mollie notices. She’s been watching the door since they got here, conveniently choosing the table with the best view, just in case some profilers decided to stop by.

Derek catches Mollie’s eye and winks.

“Well I never,” Mollie fakes shock, “Look who just walked through the doors.”

You turn and choke on your drink. Emily and Derek look relax, like they’re home, but Spencer?

He looks just like he did earlier: like there’s a million places he’d rather be.

He’s lost the blazer he was wearing earlier, leaving him in a fitted purple shirt with a matching tie. With the sleeves rolled up to his elbows, you can see his firm hands and the silver watch that rests on his wrist – is it possible for a watch to be sexy? Or maybe it’s just cause he’s sexy?

That shot must be getting to you.

“What the hell are they doing here?” You hiss, a sharp whisper piercing the air as you turn and (terribly) try to hide your face.

But Spencer’s seen you. He spotted you the moment they came in – he recognised your clothes and your hair – and the second he did he turned right back around to exit the bar. Derek’s arm stopped him at his chest, like he does to unsubs, forcefully turning him around and laughing when Spencer tensed up.

“What, Reid? Scared of a pretty girl?” Derek teases, much like he’d been doing since he spoke to you earlier.

“I am scared of college girls, yes. Last time I was in a college bar I was twelve and downed shots of apple juice.”

“What?!” Both Emily and Derek stop short, looks of disbelief at the revelation. “You’ve never mentioned that.”

“It’s embarrassing.”

“We,” Derek places his hands on Spencer’s shoulders, directing him to your table, “Are just gonna have a few drinks and talk to a few people, and then you’re gonna explain that apple juice story in explicit detail- hey ladies!”

Jen and Mollie look overjoyed at the new company, while you stare rigidly with distinctive what the fuck eyes.

“Would you mind if we joined you?” Emily asks, with a sparkling grin that no one could say no to.

“Of course not,” Jen grins, like it’s the most obvious answer.

The empty seat next to you is taken by Spencer (Derek discreetly shoves him) but right before he’s firmly placed on the stool, Emily calls out, “Spence, why don’t you get us some drinks? You still owe us after you lost that game of gin..”

“I didn’t lose.” Spencer huffs indignantly, “You cheated.”

Despite his grunts, he stands to make his way to the bar, but not before-

“Y/N!” Mollie beams, “It’s your turn to get the round, if you’d be so kind.”

You know that look on her face. You hate her, you realise, but you also love her because being alone with Spencer sends a thrill through you.

Alone with Spencer. What the hell are you supposed to say to him?

You follow him to the bar. He leans against it with an awkward smile.

“Hey, Y/N.”

“Hey.”

“It’s uh.. it’s been a long time since we’ve seen eachother.” It’s a half attempt at a joke, followed by instant regret. But then you giggle and everything feels right in the world, even Spencer’s sucky joke.

“It has been a while, Doctor Reid.” You say. The bartender approaches, takes your orders, then you turn to Spencer, “What brings you to a college bar, of all places?”

“Well,” Spencer glances over your shoulder to your table. He makes eye contact with every single person there, all watching you two interact, and they all sharply turn and try to play it off like they’ve been talking casually. Spencer’s brows furrow a little. “Derek said the drinks are cheap and our hotel is only a couple blocks away. I don’t know, maybe Derek likes college girls.”

You laugh again, and Spencer has to take a second to realise you’re not laughing at him but at what he said about Derek. “Yeah, Derek seems like a real ladies man.”

“Oh, you don’t know the half of it.” Spencer grins, “We once timed him to see how long it would take to get a girls number and he did it in five minutes. And he said he was having a bad day.”

The drinks are placed in front of you. Neither of you notice.

You unconsciously lean closer, saying, “Have you timed it to see how long it takes for a girl to approach him? That’s gotta be, like, maybe ten minutes?”

“Eight minutes and twenty-three seconds.”

“Well damn. Has he always been so…” A hand gestures in the air, looking for the word.

“Promiscuous?”

“I was gonna say free.”

“Free?” Spencer giggles, “That’s very nice of you.”

You shrug, “I don’t judge.” Spencer agrees, and it slips out, “What about you?”

You wish you could shove the words back in your mouth. Even more so when his expression changes. You can’t entirely make out what it is, but even in the dimly lit bar you can see the flush of heat that spreads through his cheeks to his ears.

“Are you asking me if I’m free with the ladies?” He murmurs, suppressing a grin.

You give an awkward laugh, wondering if you’ve overstepped a boundary, “Yeah. But that’s kinda weird to ask, so-“

“I’m so popular with the ladies it puts Derek to shame.”

You can’t hide your surprise. “What? Really?”

Spencer caves. “No. Is it that hard to believe I’m a ladies man?”

“Compared to Derek? Yes.”

Spencer scoffs.

+++

“As adorable as they are, it’s been thirty minutes.” Emily sighs. “I want my drink.”

“They’re bonding,” Jen sends a wistful look, “I’m so proud.”

“I’m guessing Y/N isn’t the most social either?” Derek asks, proudly watching you interact.

“She’s the best, just a little shy sometimes.” She smiles at you, even though you can’t see, “She’s an idiot, but our idiot, you know?”

Both Emily and Derek laugh airily, nodding with a, “Yeah, we know.”

At once, three phones vibrate throughout the bar – Emily, Derek and Spencer. They’re instantly filled with disappointment; Derek can’t watch Spencer attempt to flirt with a girl he’s obviously interested in, Emily still hasn’t got a drink, and Spencer has to leave you and he can’t think of anything worse.

He’s clearly hesitant when he looks at his phone. How does he say goodbye? Does he ask for your number? Would that be weird? That would be weird.

“Uhh…”

You channel every ounce of liquid courage you have in your body and offer, “Would it be weird if I gave you my number? Just.. for anything. Anything at all.”

Spencer nods, a gentle look in his eyes and a smile on his face, “Yeah, I’d like that.”

You mumble an alright, accepting Spencer’s phone and creating a new contact for yourself.

Please text me. You think. Please text me.

+++

He doesn’t text.

It’s been a week. A week. You know how cases are, some take longer than others and some are solved in literal hours, but it’s been a week, Spencer goddamn Reid, so why haven’t you texted me.

That’s when the doubt creeps in. Your friends keep telling you he’ll text, that he’s just busy (“He’s an FBI agent, Y/N. If you start dating you’re gonna have to get used to lapses in contact.” To which you’re too distracted choking at the mention of you two dating), but you can’t help but wonder if he took your number simply so he could leave quicker. He had a case to get to, after all. He had people to save.

Now you feel guilty. You forced your number on him, didn’t you? Oh God, he hates you. He hates you and you forced your number on him and he hasn’t texted you because he’s filing a restraining order against you because he hates you.

Mollie tells you you need a nap.

+++

Spencer spends the time on the jet back from the case staring at your number. He has it memorised, of course, and has had it memorised from the first time he read it, of course, but he can’t bring himself to do anything with it.

All he’s done is change your contact picture from the standard first letter of your name to a cute picture of a frog Garcia sent him. It reminds him of you.

Derek lowers his headphones, “You texted her yet, Pretty Boy?”

“Huh? Uh, no. I don’t think I will.”

“Why not?”

“I don’t know,” Spencer shrugs, locking his phone and placing it face down. “I don’t think anything would come from it.”

“Kid,” Derek leans forward, eyebrows furrowed, “You two talked for well over thirty minutes in the middle of a college bar about God knows what. Maybe I’m easy to impress, but that seemed pretty special to me.”

“How is talking in a college bar worth anything?”

“Because you’re Reid, who, most of the time, has to be physically dragged into a bar. You hate talking to strangers about anything other than work. Y/N? A stranger. What did you two talk about?”

“We talked about you a little.”

“Uhuh. About how good I am at my job?”

“God, no,” Spencer scrunches his nose, “We talked about your charm with the ladies.”

Derek falls back in his chair and scoffs, “I’m flattered, but that doesn’t sound like work-talk to me. So you’re comfortable with her. I saw you laughing, so she makes you laugh, too. Sounds pretty great to me.”

Spencer stares. Derek’s right, but..

“So what is it, Reid?”

Spencer licks his lips. “Do you think she’s too young for me?”

Derek rarely looks taken aback, but he does now, “Too young?”

“She’s in college. I’m-I’m-“

“A legal adult. As is she.”

Spencer slumps. “A 2014 Current Population Survey found the average difference for a heterosexual couple is two-point-three years, with the man older than the woman. Even if you double that, that’s still less than me and Y/N-“

“Four years isn’t a lot, Spence,”

“You just.. you don’t think it’s weird?”

“No. Do you?”

“No. Yes. I don’t know.”

Derek’s conviction gives Spencer some reassurance, but he can’t help himself when he thinks that.. maybe.. you’ll find him boring. Most people seem to, with all his statistics and figures and facts, but with the added element of you living it up at college.. how could he compete?

“I think you’re worrying over nothing, Reid. You haven’t even texted her, and you’re already worrying about stuff like age gaps?” Derek crosses his hands and looks at Spencer with determination, “She gave you her number. She initiated it. She knows who you are, so she knows how old you are and it doesn’t seem to make her uncomfortable. So, why should it make you?”

Spencer just grunts.

“Are you worried people will say things?”

“I guess.”

“People always say things. You know that better than anyone. So screw ‘em.”

Spencer feels a smile creep onto his face.

And Derek relaxes. He’s planted the seeds, that Spencer is fretting over nothing, now all he’s got to do is wait for Spencer to let it sink in and allow the flowers to bloom and, next thing you know, Spencer’s gonna have himself the perfect girlfriend.

And Derek will take too much credit for it.

+++

“Heeeeeeeeey my precious Doctor…”

Garcia looks like her hand was caught in the cookie jar.

Spencer’s back straightens. “What did you do?”

She looks embarrassed, fiddling with the fluffy pen in her hand. She smiles awkwardly. “Derek may have told me about a pretty little college student that captured your heart, and then he told me you also haven’t texted her yet, so I did a little digging and…”

“You cyber-stalked Y/N?” Emily asks, casually. JJ seems unphased at the discussion. Does everyone in the office know about you?

“I did. I’m guilty. I’m sorry. I couldn’t resist.” She’s speaking a mile a minute.

Emily spares Spencer a glance, “Did you find anything?”

“Well…”

Concern fills Spencer. “Did something happen?”

“I just found some stuff she’d probably only tell a close friend and I feel really bad about it.” Her shoulders are by her ears as she tries to fold in on herself out of guilt, “But other than that she’s a genuinely sweet girl who volunteers at pet shelters and the college library in her free time and we have really similar music tastes so I think we’d make great friends.”

They all look to Spencer, waiting for his reaction. What? Is he supposed to be surprised that you’re the epitome of perfect? He’s not. He studied you the entire time you spoke.

“She’s also written several incredible papers on child development that I think are revolutionary and I totally emailed them to you because I think you should read them. She’s also a genius.”

Spencer’s hand twitches. He ignores the sudden need to check his email.

It’s silent as they just stare at him. He doesn’t say anything and tries not to react, but he does. They notice how his eyes flicker to his phone, how his leg fidgets, the longing in his eyes.

Emily brushes her hair back calmly and asks, “Hey, Pen, when does Y/N work at the college library?”

Penelope doesn’t catch on at first, casually replying, “Oh, basically every day from five pm onwards. They’re a twenty-four hour library and she combines working and studying.” When she sees Emily pointedly look at Spencer, she goes ohhh.

“Good to know,” Emily nods, “Good to know.”

+++

Spencer finds himself at the college library that night.

He wants to say it was an accident, or that he just happens to know there’s a special edition of a specific book here, but he’d be lying. He read your papers between reports, and found himself having a deep appreciation for the way you write – he wants to ready everything you’ve ever written. Every essay, every note, every formal and informal piece of work you’ve ever done.

He’s already fallen in love with the way you write. He doesn’t think he’s far from falling in love with you.

He wanders around the lower floor of the library. It’s impressive, he must admit, and he’s disappointed in himself for not visiting earlier. There’s students everywhere, but he notices some other people mixed in too – professors, businesspeople, as well as parents with their children.

He feels a little less weird for creeping around now.

Not that’s he’s creeping. He’s just.. there. To see a certain someone under the guise of looking for a book.

He moseys for a while, from the fiction section to the non-fiction to comics to autobiographies. You’re nowhere to be found – not between the rows of books, not working on any of the desks, not at the centre reception desk.

Until you’re suddenly behind him.

“Spencer?”

He jumps, looking up from the book he’s reading. Your voice is as calming and smooth as always.

“Y/N. Hi.”

“Hi,” Your brows are furrowed, but you’re not disappointed by the unexpected visitor. “What are you doing here?”

He lifts the book he’s holding, an Arthur Conan Doyle, giving a light lipped smile. “I’m just looking. I didn’t realise the college library was so plentiful – did you know the oldest library in the world dates from the seventh century BC?”

“I do, actually.” You point to a poster behind him, which displays that exact fact, “I thought dotting facts around the library would be interesting for the kids. They seem to like them.”

“Learning in young children is socially mediated, so good quality learning environments outside of their schools is crucial for children’s development. So, in a way, you’re enriching their lives beyond understanding.”

You’re flattered at his somewhat far-fetched attempt at complimenting you. It makes your heart flutter.

Why didn’t you contact me, you dimwit?

You open your mouth to ask another question, ask if there’s something he needs help finding, when he beats you to it.

With a firm grip, he slams the book he’s reading shut and says, “I’m lying.”

“Oh?”

“I didn’t come here to.. look around. I came here to see you.”

“Oh.”

Spencer doesn’t know what to make of that. You haven’t awkwardly looked away, or stepped back to increase the distance between you. That means something good, right?

“You didn’t text me, so I assumed you weren’t interested.” Your brows twitch, and you back-pedal, “Unless you purposely didn’t text me because you actually weren’t interested and you might be here to see me but for something book-related rather than me-related and I’ve totally humiliated myself.”

“No, no. You’re right. You’re right.” He fiddles with the book in shame, “I should’ve texted you. I just didn’t know what to say and.. Well, it’s stupid.”

Your head jerks a little to the side, something he’s noticed you do a lot, looking patient and too pretty for him to handle. “I’m sure it’s not stupid.”

Spencer thinks back to his conversation with Derek, specifically the reminder that you gave him your number which means you initiated this so yes, you are interested in him.

It’s just.. when he looks at you, he struggles to believe it a little. You’re breath-taking.

“I’m worried I’ll bore you.” He starts light, easing you into what’s been troubling him. He’s emboldened by the fact you’re clearly frustrated he didn’t text you.

You give him a look of horror, “The first time we met I told you I loved your dissertation on geographic regression. I definitely do not think you’re anything anywhere near boring.”

“Okay,” He nods, “What about our ages?”

You’re confused. “What about it?”

Spencer mirrors your expression. “It doesn’t.. bother you?”

“Does it.. bother you?”

Usually, answering a question with a question is a sign of deflection, a sign of hiding something. However he doesn’t know why, but Spencer trusts you with his life. Maybe not his life. Maybe his heart.

“Does that silence mean yes?”

He shakes his head, “No. It doesn’t bother me. I just worry that, you know, college years are the so-called best years of your life and I don’t want you to regret being with me, someone older than you, and resent me for it, or something-“

“I think you’re getting way in your head, Spence.” You laugh a little, “We haven’t gone on a single date and you’ve convinced yourself of so much already. For the record, no, your age doesn’t bother me in the slightest. It never has and I doubt it ever will. I think you’re the most fascinating and interesting person on this planet, and if anyone is getting bored with anyone I’m pretty confident it’ll be you getting sick of me. And,” You take a breath, “I think I’m old enough to know what I want, who I want, and what I want is you. If you want me, too.”

Spencer shoves the book back into the bookshelf with a satisfying sound, then turns and quickly places a kiss onto your cheek. It’s completely unexpected and, quite frankly, not something you’d expect from Doctor Reid, but you blush and there’s a definite red colour to Spencer’s cheeks, too.

“I will never, ever, get sick of you.” He says, voice small but firm. “But I don’t want you to regret being with me. Promise me you won’t.”

You give him a look that tells him you think he’s ridiculous. “I promise that I won’t regret being with you. I’d like us to last as long as possible, if I can be picky.”

“I’d like that, too.” He murmurs. The thought of you wanting him for as long as possible almost sends him into a frenzy. He wants to kiss you all over.

You stand close and talk quietly for a while, a little more discussion on a possible date that weekend and a constant stream of compliments from you to Spencer and vice versa, before you realise the time.

“I should probably go. I have a paper to finish.” You smile sadly, a tiny pout forming.

“I understand. Do you think I could read it? When you’re done?”

Your eyebrows shoot up, “Do you know how terrifying the idea of the Spencer Reid reading my work is? But yes, anything for you.”

Anything for you. Are you trying to kill him?

You turn to leave, refusing to admit how sad leaving Spencer makes you feel, when you stop, “One more thing.”

Spencer hums. He’s not fully paying attention, praying to whatever Gods exist that killers take a break on the weekend so he can take you out on the sweetest date.

“If age is a sore area for you,” There’s mirth in your eyes and Spencer prepares himself, “Does that mean the nickname old man is off the table?”

His lips purse and move towards his nose as he narrows his eyes, giving you a look of faux annoyance, “I am not an old man.”

“Sounds like you’re sensitive, old man.”

As you walk away, you jokingly blow him a kiss to add insult to injury. His pretend glare lasts until your back is turned and he feels his gaze softening to something akin to love.

Spencer thins if the rest of his life is this, you teasing him with that twinkle in your eye and smile on your face, then life is truly the most beautiful thing.

#spencer reid x reader #spencer reid x you #spencer reid fanfiction #criminal minds x reader #criminal minds fanfiction #spencer reid fanfic #mine

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platoniclokiimagines · 4 years

Note

Loki being a sucker for pet names? He says he's a monster but when you use a pet name for him he just s t o p s

WC: 1654

TW: mention of counseling and anger management

A/N: I couldn’t remember the pronouns of who sent this in, because it’s been like Two Years, hence the “Lady” used in this fic, but for future reference, when I re-open requests, if you could please let me know the pronouns you’d like in the fic, I would greatly appreciate it. Thank you!

A/N 2: There were many, many ways I could have gone with this, but naturally I went a little whumpy. Sue me. And enjoy~

The first time you called Loki a pet name, you hadn’t meantanything by it.

It was your night to make dinner, and Loki, still new tobeing around the compound and therefore not as trusted by most everyone else,had been given the task of helping you with whatever you needed. You didn’tmind. Loki was quiet and didn’t ask a lot of questions, and that made them nicecompany. Certainly better that Stark and his not-so-subtle jokes and smartassquips, or Thor Thor with his twenty questions about everything Midgardianwhenever the two of you did something together.

It didn’t even make you nervous that Loki seemed to watchyour every move, like they were waiting for you to say or do something thatmight put them in danger. You just let them study you, hardly even looking upat them as you read over the recipe on your phone.

“Loki, be a doll and pass me the salt, please? It’s thatcontainer just by the stove.”

“I quite beg your pardon?”

Loki’s slightly offended tone gave you pause, and you lookedup at them, brow furrowed. “…salt? It’s a seasoning. That white,crystal-looking-”

“No, I know what salt is, Lady Y/N.”

“You don’t have to call me that. It’s just Y/N.” You smileda bit as you watched them. “…was it the term of endearment? I can stop, if itmakes you uncomfortable.”

“…endearment.” Loki seemed genuinely confused, and you filedthat away to remember it.

“…yes? Nicknames are much faster to say than Loki, God ofMischief, you know.”

“…right.” After a long moment, Loki turned to the stove andfetched the salt, as you had asked, and said nothing else as they handed it toyou.

You weren’t sure what else to say on the matter, either, soyou just smiled and murmured a quiet thank you before turning back to yourcooking.

You supposed it made sense, given everything Thor had toldyou and the rest of the Avengers about everything Loki had been through, thataffection and endearment was something Loki wasn’t accustomed to. You wouldn’tbe surprised if you found out Loki had never been called by anything other thantheir name or the snarky nicknames Tony had for them.

It seemed like a terrible way togrow up, with little affection between you and your family members. All themore reason to show it now, you decided, and it was with that thought in mindthat your mission to test out pet names for Loki came to fruition.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Days passed before you comfortably had the chance to slipanother affectionate nickname into conversation with Loki. Even with such ashort time period between the two points in time, Loki had seemed to warm up toyou even more, sometimes going so far as to choose to sit on the same couchwith you as they read, while you either watched tv or fiddled on your phone.

Not wanting to make them uncomfortable, you waited to makesure that you were the only two in the room before you glanced over at them,mostly so you could watch their reaction. “Loki, dear, can you hand me theremote? I’ll turn it down so it’s quieter for you to read.”

Just as before, Loki hesitated, like they weren’t entirelysure how to handle being calledsomething affectionate, and it took them a few moments before they seemed tosnap out of it. “…that’s really not necessary, L… Y/N. I’m used to reading in far louder environments. You think Thor’sloud now, you wouldn’t believe theamount of noise he made as a teenager.”

You laughed a bit. “Yes, I imagine Thor was one of thosekids that was easily excitable and loud in expression.”

“Yes, that’s it exactly.” Loki smiled a little, as well, andyou released a breath you didn’t realize you were holding.

One way or another, you weregoing to get Loki used to being treated nicely. Even if it took months.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

As part of the agreement that ensured Loki could stay on atthe compound, Loki had been placed in an array of different therapy sessions,ranging from anger management to sibling counseling with Thor to just regularone-on-one counseling.

Unfortunately, that meant that sometimes Loki came back fromthem in a storm of a bad mood, wanting nothing more than to separate themselffrom the rest of the group and sulk somewhere where they could beself-deprecating or angry or hurt in peace.

You hadn’t particularlymeant to stumble upon Loki in one of these moods; mostly, you just wanted tomake sure that they were okay, and to see if there was anything you could do orget for them.

Hesitantly, you knocked on the door, not wanting to startlethem and risk upsetting them even more.

“Loki…? It’s Y/N. Can I come in?”

Loki gave no response, but after a pregnant pause, you heardthe door unlock, and you took that as an okay to go ahead into their room.Making sure to lock the door behind you, out of politeness, you turned aroundto see Loki curled up in the smallest ball you imagined they could manage.Unsure if you should try to get closer, you stayed where you were, watchingthem in silence.

“…can I get you anything? Some water, or… tea? We have someof that chamomile that you like. I made sure to get plenty of boxes the lasttime we went to the store, and-”

“Why do you bother?”

You were a bit taken aback by Loki’s words, not because theyheld any bite, but because they seemed so earnest.Like they genuinely couldn’t understand why you wanted to help.

“…I’m sorry, I don’t quite understand what you mean.”

“I mean why areyou going through all this trouble? Being nice, talking to me when no one elsedoes, checking up on me? Don’t you ever get bored with it?”

“…why would I get bored with it?”

Loki turned to look at you then, scowling, though you weren’tentirely sure it was directed at you. “Because no one likes being thesacrificial lamb, the… the balance between sides.”

“…I suppose I don’t see it like that.”

Loki didn’t scoff or roll their eyes, like you expected theymight, but instead, they just looked at you, almost more earnestly than you’dever seen them look before.

“And how do yousee it?”

“Well… We’re friends.” You smiled a bit. “We’re two newpeople, getting to know each other while also getting used to being around theothers, too.”

“We can’t be friends.” Loki said it almost robotically, likeit was a trained response. “For one thing, you’re a human, and I’m a god and…Y/N, I’ve done things that are terrible. Horrible, horrible things, with verylittle by means of making up for it. Ask any one of the people in the room outthere, and they’ll tell you. I’m nothing but a monster.”

“I think you’re an absolute angel.”

You said it without even thinking about it, and whateverLoki had been in the process of saying or thinking didn’t matter, because theyjust stopped. Didn’t move, didn’tspeak, didn’t even seem to breathe. They just looked at you.

The silence in the room was almost deafening, and part ofyou wanted to think that you might have said the wrong thing, but a greaterpart of you knew that what you’d said was not a lie. You thought the world ofLoki, and you told them as much, once they’d had some time to process.

“Loki, you’re one of the strongest people I’ve ever met inmy life. You’ve been through so much.I’ve heard the stories. And yes, you’ve made mistakes, and perhaps some ofthose mistakes have had a body count, but… you’re trying to be better. You’retrying to do better. I know you are. Thor knows you are. And the others will catch on eventually, too,in time. But for now, I’ll pick up the slack. I’ll remind you that you’re doingbetter. I’ll bring you tea and sweets when you’re having a bad day. And I’ll keepcalling you pet names until you’re so used to them that you don’t freeze up outof confusion anymore. Whatever it takes for you to believe that you’re becominga good person, that’s just as worthy as love and affection and happiness as every other person in thiscompound. Okay?”

You hadn’t meant to say so much, but once you’d started, you’dfound yourself unable to stop, andnow that you’d finished, you just watched Loki, waiting for their response and hoping you hadn’t overstepped any boundaries.

After a long moment, they nodded to themself, seeing to cometo terms with what you’d said. “…I suppose I never considered things in thatmanner.”

You nodded, as well, offering a small smile when they lookedat you. “…it’s gonna be okay, you know? I know it really sucks right now, andeverything is new and strange and different. And counseling really, reallysucks at the beginning when you have to hash out all the things you neverwanted to revisit, but… it does get better. And I’ll be here to help. As longas you’ll have me.”

Loki took a slow, deep breath, like they were deciding whatthey wanted to say, but instead, they seemed to settle for nodding, and so youjust nodded, as well.

“….so tea?”

“I would appreciate it immensely, Y/N.”

You smiled and nodded, heading back to the door. “Sure,thing.” As you turned to leave, you couldn’t resist poking your head back in. “Angel.”

Loki just looked at you, almost as though they were embarrassed,and you just smiled softly.

Yes, you thought you and Loki were going to get on quitenicely, from here on out.

#Loki imagine #platonic Loki imagine #Loki #Loki Laufeyson #Loki Odinson #marvel #Loki x reader #platonic!Loki x reader #anonymous #ask #answered #thank you for the prompt #i hope you enjoy some good old loki whump

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spider6oy · 4 years

Text

Just One Look | JJ Maybank

summary: jj has a serious problem; he can’t seem to stop staring at you. everyone notices, even you, but he doesn’t seem to want to do anything about it - or maybe he just can’t. but at a kegger on the beach, maybe this time his staring won’t go to waste?

warnings: self-loathing, self-depreciation, sickly sweet loved up teens

word count: 2030-ish

masterlist

JJ couldn't help but stare.

He really couldn't - no, like, seriously he couldn't. He had tried everything to practically stop gawking at you like some sort of fish out of water; with his eyes wide and lips parted ever so slightly. He had tried using a rubber band on his wrist, snapping it every time he would catch himself staring. He had tried pinching his arm, squeezing his skin every time he would so much as glance your way. He had even tried slapping himself across the face one time - although it did raise a few eyebrows and brought more questions than JJ cared to answer.

But none of those techniques had worked.

JJ had remembered hearing from someone before, that if you punish yourself enough times whilst doing something you didn't want to do (in this case it was staring at you like you were a pot of gold at the end of a goddamn rainbow), then your mind would soon learn to see that action as undesirable and bad, and eventually you would stop.

Well, JJ thought whoever had said that was definitely talking out of their ass - his money was on Pope.

But in the end it didn't matter what JJ tried to do to stop himself from staring at you, nothing would ever seem to work, and he was completely done with it.

"Dude, you're doing it again." John B commented as he took a swig from the red solo cup in his hand; smirking slightly as he noticed his blonde friend gawping at you from across the beach.

"Doing what?" JJ asked innocently, bringing his own red cup up to his lips and taking a long sip. He continued to watch you dance amongst your friends and the other people who had turned up to the kegger. His eyes traced over your body slowly; completely entranced by the way you moved your hips and swayed your body to the beat of the music.

"Making yourself look like a creep, as per usual JJ." Kiara stated, pulling the colourful sunglasses down the bridge of her nose and staring over the brim of them at the not-so-subtle teen. "I mean, is it so hard to actually go over and talk to her?" she questioned, accepting the cup of beer Pope had just brought back from the keg.

"Oh a thousand percent. Listen, in JJ's mind, talking to Y/N is the equivalent to going to The Crain House and getting caught by Mrs Crain herself - he would no doubt shit his pants." Pope joked, quickly dodging JJ's fist as he tried to land a punch to his chest.

JJ shook his head as he gave Pope a weak shove (not actually wanting to hurt his friend), rolling his eyes as his friends continued to joke and laugh about his unfortunate situation. He had become used to the banter and quips that came with his major crush on you, but never letting the jokes get to his head because most of the time they were true - to a certain extent.

JJ would like to think he wouldn't shit his pants if he actually went to talk to you. . . well. . . he could only pray he wouldn't.

But, his friends were right in saying that he was scared to talk to you. He was absolutely terrified. Even the thought of sending you a simple 'Hello' made his heartbeat quicken and his palms start to clam up.

About two years ago he had tried to talk to you. His friends had challenged him, tired of the way he would trail after you like some love-sick puppy, to go up to you and just start a conversation. JJ thought for a moment as he looked at you, sitting at a table in The Wreck at the opposite side of the room to him and the Pogues. He thought why not? He wasn't going to get to know you if he didn't make the first move - up until this point he was pretty sure you didn't even know he existed. So, he stood up from his seat (much to the surprise of his friends) and walked towards your table. He set his eyes on you; watching as your smile widened and your eyes crinkled as you laughed at something your friend had said to you – not noticing the waiter that was walking towards him on his right-hand side.

All JJ could remember was ending up on the floor; covered from head to toe in fish-stew and attracting the attention of every single customer in the restaurant. After that he swore that he would never try and speak to you again; knowing that if he did, something bad would inevitably end up happening.

Because when did anything ever go right for JJ, huh?

“JJ, I doubt anything bad would actually happen, just go over there and talk to her!” John B said, slightly flailing his arms around as he grew fed up of his friends’ cowardice.

JJ looked at all three of his friends; Kie and Pope nodding their heads in agreement with what John B had just said – but to JJ, that didn’t matter. He just shook his head, swirling the beer in his cup around as he lightly kicked at the sand under his feet.

“JJ, I bet she doesn’t even remember what happened at the restaurant two years ago, if that’s what you’re worried about.” Kiara added, swatting at Pope’s hand as he tried to steal the sunglasses perched on her nose.

“But you remember!” JJ pointed out, looking up from the sand.

“Yes, but that’s only because I know how much you hate that memory, and I enjoy watching you suffer.” Kiara countered, finally taking her sunglasses off and placing them on Pope’s head, receiving a wide grin from the boy.

“Listen JJ, I know you’re scared to go and talk to Y/N, I get it. It didn’t go to plan last time, and I get that it affected you, but that was still only your first time trying! You don’t even know what could’ve happened if you’d tried again, and you won’t know what will happen if you don’t try now!” Kiara laced her hand with Pope’s, mumbling about wanting to go and grab another beer, before turning back towards JJ. “Just. . . don’t waste your time staring at a girl, when you’re not even going to do anything about it, JJ. It’s really not worth it.”

“Your secret admirer is staring at you, again.” Heather commented, her eyes motioning to the blonde boy that was stood across the beach.

You glanced towards your left; smiling lightly as you noticed JJ looking over in your direction, giggling at the sight of him quickly averting his eyes and awkwardly scratching the back of his neck – trying to act as if he hadn’t just been caught.

You had always sort of been aware of the stares and glances from JJ Maybank. At first, when your friends had pointed out that they had seen JJ staring at you, you were quick to play it off. Always saying how he couldn’t have been staring at you; it must have been someone else, or that he was probably just staring at your friends, because there was no way he could have been staring at you.

Right?

But after a few months, you had started to notice yourself that JJ was staring at you (with this look of just complete and utter adoration and warmth that made you feel instantly weak at the knees and want nothing more than to run into his arms and just never let go).

What struck you the most from the action was simply confusion; confusion as to why he would choose to stare at you? Out of everyone in The Outer Banks; out of all the Kook’s, and the Touron’s, and the Pogue’s (especially the Pogues, considering you had always thought that JJ and Kiara had something going on); he chose you.

You.

Plain and simple you.

Nothing special. Nothing exciting. Nothing out-of-this-world amazing.

Just. . . you – Y/F/N Y/L/N.

And somehow that had been one of the hardest things you had ever had to come to terms with; the fact that someone liked you, the fact that someone found you attractive, the fact that someone would go out of their way just to look at you, and only you.

You had never been the most confident of people; quite often struggling to find the positives in yourself when all you could see was the flaws. Your friends would tell you countless times that you were stunning and hot and gorgeous; but those comments didn’t even make a scratch on the hatred and disgust that surrounded you like a shield of armour – attacking you instead of protecting you.

But when you caught JJ gazing at you with that look - it felt like something inside of you had finally broken free from your prison of self-deprecation; some sort of self-worth, or self-love, or whatever you wanted to call it. It really didn’t matter. Because for the first time in your life, you could finally look at yourself and see the beauty that everyone else could see.

The beauty that JJ could see.

“Why don’t you go over and talk to him?”

“What?” You questioned, completely caught off guard by Heathers proposal.

Heather rolled her eyes lightly, still swaying to the beat of the music playing from some speaker situated on the beach. “Y/N, that boy has been staring at you for the last. . . I don’t even know how many years – a lot, probably, and during this entire time he has not once come up to speak to you – which is pretty stupid in my opinion, but I’m not gonna get into that,” Heather rambles, making you laugh and shake your head at her words.

“The point is Y/N, is that I can tell JJ is nervous and just doesn’t have the confidence to come up and talk to you himself. . . which is quite surprising because he’s always come off as pretty cocky and confident to me – but anyways, so-“.

“Heather, what’s the point?” You ask; trying to stop Heather from falling down a rabbit hole of her own thoughts.

“I’m getting to that. . . the point is Y/N; is that you have to go up and talk to him. He just. . . can’t come to you.” Heather stated, shrugging her shoulders lightly as she looked over in JJ’s direction. “I don’t know why really. Maybe something happened to him before? Maybe something has just put him off from coming to speak to you?” Heather turned back towards you; grabbing your shoulders and turning you towards JJ, slightly pushing you forward. “But we will never know unless you go and talk to him! So, go!”. Heather gave you one final push; sending you out of the crowd of dancers and towards the drinking bystanders.

You quickly turn back around, hoping to find Heather to try and talk her out of this crazy idea, but she was gone – already swallowed by the large crowd of dancing teenagers. You sigh lightly, feeling your heartbeat start to pick up as you slowly turned back around.

You eyes instantly spot JJ; standing next to his friend (who you think is called John B), drinking from a red solo cup, and talking about god-knows-what.

You take one step across the sand, feeling your hands start to shake as adrenaline seeps into your bloodstream. You take another, feeling your breaths start to quicken as anticipation begins to build in your chest. You take another, feeling a slight sweat begin to settle on your forehead as the anxiety starts to set in.

You take another, and another, and another; until you’re practically almost beside him.

You go to take another, and you suddenly stop.

Your eyes widen slightly. Your breath catches in your throat. Your heart feels as though it’s stopped beating.

Because he’s looking at you and you’re looking at him.

Because he’s caught your eye and you’ve caught his.

Because you’re both looking at each-other now.

This wasn’t some stolen glance, or a sneaky look anymore.

This was a real and true two-way-connection; one that made your heart burst with excitement and your mind spin with wonder – you never wanted that feeling to end.

You took another step forward now, no longer feeling dread and anxiety swell inside of you but instead it was a feeling of anticipation and fascination. The feeling only continued to grow as you neared JJ – nothing could stop you now or slow your pace.

You had to get to JJ.

Out of the corner of your eyes you noticed John B leave JJ’s side, a knowing smirk plastered on his lips as he tried to hide it with a swig of his plastic cup.

You finally do stop, arms-length away from the blonde boy stood in front of you; equally as awestruck and dumbfounded as you currently felt.

You both hold the look.

You both stared at each other.

You both smiled.

“I’m Y/N.” You said, holding out your hand for him to shake.

“I’m JJ.” He retorted, slipping his hand into yours.

#jj maybank #jj maybank fanfiction #jj maybank fic #jj maybank one shot #jj maybank x fem!reader #jj maybank x reader #jj maybank x y/n #outer banks #outer banks fic #jj x reader

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oftenderweapons · 4 years

Note

Not sure if this counts as a Drabble I’m not really familiar with it sorry! So you can ignore if you want but maybe you can do a list of BTS and the OC’s favorite kinks

[A/N: this took a very long time coming, mostly because it was a lengthy job. Sorry for the wait nonnie, I hope it’s worth it 🥴😉]

Okay! I sort of assembled this as a mix of short headcanons (there are six to eight each — also I got carried away with Jk, he’s got eleven but some are like, are more lowkey). They’re divided couple by couple and I’ve tried to be as realistic as possible, which means that some couples have some kinks in common, especially since I stayed on more well-known kinks and fetishes that represent each couple’s go-to. I do think they explore less popular kinks other than the ones I listed, however they might not go there that often.

You’ll be seeing some of these soon ;) [ILLICIT AFFAIRS WON I AM CRYING]

Uhm. Obviously there’s a lot of stuff I have to include in the trigger warnings, so bear with me.

This is obviously 18+

TRIGGER WARNINGS: discipline (brat taming, sub training), impact play (spankings, paddle, flogger, riding crop; both on ass and breasts), marking, dirty talking, choking, masturbation (male and female receiving; mututal), squirting, several fetishes (uniform, shoes, feet, voice), cock worship, breast worship, powerplay (DDLG, daddy kink; domination; mommy kink; Primal/predator-prey dynamics, pet play), orgasm control and deprivation, role play, food play, cum play/cum eating, pain kink, sensation play, temperature play, edging and overstimulation, phone sex, cyber sex, bondage, torture play/forced masturbation, tickling, anal play (buttplugs, strap on, rimming, penetration), degradation kink, corruption kink, voyeurism and exhibitionism, outdoor sex, cockwarming, oral sex (male and female receiving; facefucking male receiving; mutual), sex toys (nipple clamps, dildo, vibrator)

Not exactly kinks, more like attitudes: experimentalism, intimacy, sapiosexuality

Check out my masterlist here

Enjoy 💜✨

Namjoon and Vixen

Daddy kink; brat taming

I think it’s sort of a given, but it also needs to be included. Vixen’s first relationship was when she had just turned nineteen, with a man quite older than her. They were together for a couple years and he significantly shaped her needs in terms of intimacy and sex. Her parenting figures were really weak and she grew up with a nanny who taught her her second language, French. Namjoon — being always a very responsible very nurturing figure within the group, and somehow having the role of a mediator — is used to stubborn, hot-headed people and would probably be a bit bored with someone incapable of giving him a bit of attitude. This said, it comes quite natural that Vixen (although she is a very smart, very elegant young lady) looks for guidance in her partner, and after the responsibilities that come with her career, she looks for someone who can take decisions for her and even control her private life a little, like check that she eats and what she eats, or pick what she’s going to wear for the day. On the other hand, Namjoon likes being taken care of in other ways, namely cuddles and homecooked meals, which Vixen offers profusely. Her childlike, unconditional affection is exactly what makes Namjoon baby her, and such behaviour on his behalf encourages her to rely on him even more, letting him pamper her and spoil her. And in terms of bratting... Well, Vixen likes seeing him lose his cool — because a sick part of her (she knows it’s sick) gets horny seeing Namjoon angry. And Namjoon in returns gets even more cool and composed the more she gets feisty. He calls the shot, may she like it or not. The point is that with some cuddles, soft words (and a few good spanks) he always manages to tame her.

Spanking

Vixen likes getting spanked. And Namjoon is obsessed with her ass. He is an ass and thighs man. Fight me on this one. Nothing turns him on more than seeing her flesh quiver after the impact of a good spank. Vixen likes it simply because it condenses three of her favourite things, discipline, punishments and pain kink. Spanks are delivered both as a reward and as a punishment, and Namjoon knows how to make a distinction between the two cases, although he much prefers delivering them as a reward, since he hasn’t got much of a pain kink, and painful activities are a soft limit for him, both in terms of giving and receiving. He approves that kind of pain that is simply aimed at enhancing pleasure. Vixen really likes spanks delivered with the bare palm of a hand, since those are the one that she perceives as the most “educational”; however she also likes the paddle, the hairbrush and other more tricky devices (that you will discover soon *wink*).

Marking

Namjoon is crazy for marking Vixen. He is very jealous of her and their relationship staying on the low means that he can’t actually claim her publicly. They both try to protect their relationship for as long as possible, and I can quite see him deciding to keep it private until he’s been married to her for a while. But he’s gonna mark his baby, especially in spots that are only his and hers to see. His absolutely favourite spot would be her hip tattoo, of course, where he always places the first hickey of the night; next her inner thighs, her crotch and her breasts (lovely tiny cherries, he loves them the most). When she allows him, he also leaves hickeys on her neck and chest. Obviously her butt too. He also likes biting, especially her ass (until he leaves bruises and/or actual indentations) and her inner thighs — the softer parts. Vixen also marks him when he’s not on a schedule, when they’re on vacation and they can let loose a little. He especially likes it when she leaves scratches on his back and shoulders, but he also enjoys hickeys on his chest and thighs when she’s on her way to giving him head.

Sapiosexualilty; dirty talking

We all know these two have filthy tongues. They’re sapiosexuals, so they’re turned on by mind games, smart use of language, verbal sparring etcetera. They’re both readers and intellectuals, which means they enjoy a polished, often obscure use of language. They’re the most likely to send each other texts (or even emails) where they simply wax poetic about fucking each other. They can literally send a text at nine am about some spicy play they intend to do later that night, let excitement build all day long and — as soon as they get home — they wait and see who’s the one that surrenders (spoiler: usually Joon because Vixen is a brat and brats are tough eggs to crack). In bed, Vixen loves listening to Namjoon’s voice, no matter if he’s talking about how good it feels to be inside her or if he makes romantic love declarations in midst of a rowdy fuck. Also they might argue while they have sex or pick stupid fights just to release some tension (totally the type to start a discussion as they choose the mirror for the bathroom, Vixen picking round while Namjoon picks rectangular, embarrassing the shopping assistant as they get into hard bickering heavy with sexual tension).

Choking

This is a new one, to both of them. Vixen had never toyed with it before, since she risked drowning when she was a child so she’s not a fan of anything that involves breath control. Still, she didn’t imagine she could be turned on by choking her partner. The first time Namjoon grabs her wrist and brings her hand to his neck she freaks out a little, but then she gets a grip (haha) and realises that seeing him that fucked out, and hearing him moan like that is something most definitely turning her on. Namjoon has a sensitive neck and chest, so having Vixen touching him there makes his soul leave his body; furthermore, the level of trust required leads us right onto the next kink.

Intimacy

I realise this is not exactly a kink, however it is a necessary condition for things to get sexy between these two. Namjoon and Vixen need special closeness for things to work out. Talking, flirting, but also sharing physical closeness and affection, occupying the same mental space. They don’t need to be making love for things to be very emotional. Even the angriest, rowdiest of fuckings to them is actually a very fond way of saying ‘I love you’. I think that out all the kinks this is the most difficult to explain. I suppose this is what makes them incredibly talented even at good ol’ plain vanilla.

Mutual Masturbation

I think these two just do that a lot. They’re extremely comfortable with having the other watch as they touches themselves. I think it started with Vixen being her shameless, teasing, kinky self and Namjoon being incapable of holding back, and then it naturally evolved into both him and her openly touching themselves for the other to see. I think they learn by watching so observing the other and seeing how they do it is how they master their technique.

Lingerie and shoe fetish

Namjoon is obsessed with Vixen’s sexiness, how she carries herself, how much charisma and self confidence she can muster when she is almost naked. I’ve always seen Namjoon extremely attracted to Vixen’s body and seeing it there, with the bare necessities covered by expensive and lush lace and silk, or even in funny cotton drawers with innocent prints is a ticket to Nirvana for Namjoon. I bet you can imagine Vixen lounging on the bed, provocatoriously clad in black lace as she reads a book, and Namjoon entering the room, ready to pounce on her with predatorial intents.

Jin and Angel

Cockworship

We all know that Jin comes from several vanilla experiences, during which he always kept his basest instincts at bay. Once Angel gives him the green light, he’s not letting go. Angel loves celebrating his virility in all ways possible, showing how much she appreciates a part of him that he has felt ashamed of, in some ways. And Jin gets extremely turned on by the simple view of Angel kneeling before him, looking at him as he touches himself, begging to touch and/or kiss his cock. He gets wild with it, especially if you sum that up with Jin being especially interested in discipline. Watching Angel worship his cock with her hands, mouth, tits gives him that sense of power and authority that enhances his dominance and turns him into a cocky, power-hungry beast, ready to do anything to quench his thirst, fulfill his desires and almost entirely ignore Angel’s needs — don’t worry, she actually gets off to Jin getting what he wants on whichever terms he deems necessary.

Power play

Jin likes having power. Being more powerful than Angel is one of the mental tricks he uses to keep himself from going vanilla. The powerful position is what allows him to call the shots, choose what to do and actually claim what he wants and needs. Watching Angel kneel in front of him, with her eyes low until he calls for her attention is one of his biggest turn-ons. And Angel is way more than okay with this: watching Jin take control and knowing that she is pleasing him, that any activity they’re getting into is bound to make Jin loud and messy and fucked out, is the strongest aphrodisiac. When in a vanilla mindset, Jin can’t quite understand (yet) what pushes Angel into pleasing him and how much his pleasure means to her, as they’re still at the beginning of their sexplorations. The more they get familiar with each other’s roles and needs, the more Jin finds pleasure in ruling over Angel and watch her stare at him with her big, beautiful, hungry eyes.

Orgasm control/deprivation

Jin’s need for power manifests in different ways. The fact that Jin comes from several years of vanilla and self control, and Angel has gotten used to their calmer approach to intimacy and sex, makes them both quite good at sexual deprivation. He can easily deprive her for weeks, or deprive himself: when he’s depriving her, his favourite activity is having her kneel on the floor, naked and touch himself until he cums on her breasts; when he’s depriving himself he likes eating her out for at least two or three rounds, until she’s begging for him to fuck her, completely desperate and on the verge of tears when he denies her. Regardless of who is being deprived, when she gets whiny and emotional, he always makes sure to reassure her and remind her when the period of deprivation is going to end, telling her what he plans to do to her as soon as he allows himself to. About orgasm control — Angel needs training. And a very stern one at that. She is not used at that level of control, mostly because she’s used to a very loving, very attentive Seokjin who wants her pleased and pampered all the time. Orgasm control is most definitely the thing she hates the most out of all her training; the only factor keeping her from truly hating it is how Jin turns soft once she manages to complete a task successfully, praising her and letting her have more control — either turning the scene into vanilla lovemaking or letting her turn the tables and ride him until she’s happy and sated.

Role play

Jin sometimes needs help getting into an aggressive, authoritative mood. Luckily, he is a great actor and he know exactly how to get into character. He would often assume a role out of the blue, letting Angel choose what position to occupy — although his all time favourite is teacher-student. It allows him to get into the strictest, harshest forms of impact play, having lots of fun watching sweat, drool and cum stain Angel's uniform, or watching her breasts burst out of her schoolgirl blouse. On a minor note he loves using a paddle or a riding crop on Angel, making her bend over the edge of the bed and flipping her skirt up, spanking her until she's begging, only to sit on the bed and put her head between his legs, tugging at her pigtails (but never letting himself go too deep — he has no interest in seeing Angel gag on him, it's his own hard limit before being hers). Other types of roleplay he likes are doctor-nurse or doctor-patient, landlord-maid, pilot-hostess and obviously chef and waitress, which leads us right to next prompt.

Food play

Angel loves Jin's cooking. She loves watching his wide shoulders in front of the stove, she loves hearing him hum when he tastes something good, she loves him leaning over the table and offering her some food from his fork. She especially likes seeing him so passionate and dedicated, and she loves showing enthusiasm for a hobby that is so dear to him and on which he puts so much effort. Food play is mostly a way to set the tone for passionate, steamy lovemaking, where he worships every inch of Angel's body with his lips. Angel has developed an involuntary reaction to seeing his special cookbook on the small prop by the stove. Wetness coats her thigh as soon as she sees his messy handwriting on the page, signaling that he is indeed preparing a sauce or cream for kinky play. He really likes playing with frozen fruit and ice cream or watching Angel squirm as chocolate sauce tickles her while dribbling down her breasts. He is wicked. And also awfully gluttonous. Angel spoils him and is spoiled with this specific kink of theirs. It was the first kink they explored even when their relationship was still vanilla.

Pain kink

Not much explaining to do. Jin goes absolutely wild with riding crops and paddles. There’s nothing more exciting than watching Angel push her chest towards him, trying to convince him to remove her nipple clamps as she writhing underneath him.

Cum play

There’s nothing more exciting for Jin than watching his cum stain Angel’s breasts, or pulling out at the very last second to cum on her belly. Another thing he loves is to jerk off and make Angel wait with her mouth open, ready to welcome the head of his cock as he finally reaches his climax and spills inside her, telling her not to swallow and open her mouth to show him how much she loves the result of his pleasure before closing her mouth and swallowing, and showing that she took every single droplet of it.

Yoongi and Kitten

Sensation play

Kitten is a bad bitch. She gets off at having Yoongi moaning, squirming, whimpering and groaning underneath her. And Yoongi is so sensitive. It would be a shame not to toy with that. She likes giving him head and edging him, putting him through the absolute worst. He gets weak whenever Kitten blindfolds him, pours warm massage oil on him and procedes with the most relaxing touches and caresses. He gets whiny and desperate whenever she chooses to bring ice cubes to the bedroom and he gets absolutely wild whenever her bullet vibrator is aimed at him instead of her. Kitten is a menace — and maybe a bit of a sadist — but it always feels so sweet once she finally offers him release. Yoongi might consider it torture, but in the end he really, really loves that.

Choking kink

There’s not much difference: choking... being choked... both are okay with giving and receiving. Kitten has a sensitive neck and chest, which means any action there is a huge turn on. Her sensitivity there means she usually covers her upper torso, since it being even slightly exposed makes her feel vulnerable; plus she often needs to hide hickeys and bruises anyway.

Oral fixation; face fucking

Kitten loves giving blowjob, Yoongi loves placing his mouth anywhere on Kitten, especially on her lips, her chest and between her legs. Yoongi has given hints about... Uhm... Oral skills. I think he'd be glad to spend hours between Kitten's legs, and since she wasn't entirely confident with receiving oral sex (her ex was a prick), he is more than happy to take things slow and help her rebuild enough confidence to literally have her climb him while he's laying on the bed, and unashamedly sit on his face and ride it.

Voice fetish

When Kitten and Yoongi met, both were attracted by each other’s voice and throughout courtship and dating they both loved listening to the other talk. Yoongi knows his voice is attractive, and he is incredibly attuned to Kitten’s slightly deep, very soft and quiet voice. She has a velvety timbre that is so relaxing and exciting at the same time. He could get wild at her whispering in his ear, feeling her lips graze against the shell of his ear. However, Kitten would be equally weak if he did that to her.

Phone sex

Since they both enjoy listening to each other’s voice, and since Yoongi travels a lot, they are really into phone sex when they’re too far apart, or when Yoongi needs to stay at the dorms or if they feel extremely needy in the middle of the day. Even when he’s on tour, they prefer phone sex to kinky video calls.

Breast worship

This kink, paired up with Yoongi’s oral fixation, Kitten’s sensitive chest, and cumplay just explains how much exploring there is toward this direction. There are no limits: sensation play with ice cubes or warm massage oil, wax play, food play, boob jobs, a lot of nipple teasing… Kitten is open to experimenting and Yoongi is more than aware of what could feel nice and what would be utter torture. And he wants to try it all.

Cumplay and Cum eating

Yoongi is not afraid of things getting messy. He likes having Kitten’s juices all over his face, licking them off his lips and fingers: he doesn’t need her to taste like watermelon or smell like rainbows and unicorns. He wants a woman, real and messy. He loves the salty taste on his tongue, and he can tell when she’s close to her period for how the taste of her changes. Plus, he loves cumming on her breasts, especially if his semen accidentally marks her pretty, lacy bras.

Hoseok and Giggles

Handjobs; squirting

Hoseok’s hands are a blessing. But his fingers are a gift of the devil. They were made to sin and torture. Giggles is very sensitive on her own account. That paired up with Hoseok’s skills makes for wild nights of soaked sheets — luckily enough they buy an impermeable blanket pretty much at the beginning of their relationship.

Impact play; flogger

Not only Hoseok’s hands are a blessing, but those wrists are stretchable. Fluent. They’re perfect for cracking a whip. Or a flogger — he is a bit afraid of using a whip, and it takes a lot of space… However, floggers? He smiles wickedly whenever Giggles gets close to him on Thursday or Friday and casually sits on his lap, hooks an arm behind his neck and leans in close. “I don’t have my Monday shift… Do you think we could… Play with the flogger?” She asks, a bit insecure. He usually plans scenes for Saturday night, so he can have all the aftercare equipment ready and he can spend all Sunday taking care of Giggles. If he can comply to her request, he hugs her close to him and reassures her as they start planning more details.

Bondage

By now it is canon that these two have taken lessons, that they have personalised ropes that Giggles had to prepare personally. Although she’s more precise and diligent in knots, Hoseok is also very attentive and prepared; they often discuss bondage scenes, even over dinner, talking about how the scene will play out, which types of knots to use, how to secure the rope, et cetera.

Experimenting

As I said, they are both absolutely okay discussing stuff they want to try. It isn’t uncommon for them to be watching a movie and suddenly something appears — even something as banal as a clothespin or a makeup brush — and suddenly one of them is going: “We could use that in bed”. It isn’t uncommon for them to discuss kinky stuff during the week, planning scenes over dinner, or while they’re chilling, or whatever.

Torture play; Overstimulation; tickling

Hoseok likes seeing Giggles writhing and tossing underneath him. He likes torturing her with overstimulation, giving her orgasms back to back or making her squirt so many times that she passes out — it only happened twice and he made sure she drank almost two litres of water afterwards to make sure she didn’t get dehydrated. He also loves her laugh and her nickname comes from the lovely, happy sounds she makes when he coaxes a laugh from her. He loves tickling her to tears, her silvery voice erupting in chuckles that fill his heart with joy.

Shifting positions; multiple rounds

Hoseok has stamina and flexibility. He can go for three rounds without even blinking. He’d manoeuvre Giggles in and out of positions, directing her, helping her put her body in place, following her movements as she shifts. She’s not always happy with all the moving around, especially when she finds a good position and Hoseok decides he wants to change it; however, he can be extremely convincing and he happens to remember all her favourites, putting them in a smooth, easy sequence whenever he wants to reward her — which is at least twice a month because Giggles is the most perfect little bubble.

Jimin and Princess

Exhibitionism

Jimin lives to be watched. His mannerism and elegance make him a performer, even in the plainest tasks. When Princess is watching him, he only exists for her eyes and her eyes only. Nothing gratifies him more than the loving, passionate glances she throws at him when with their friends, or the obscured and raptured ones when she’s dominating him, or the desperate, imploring ones when it’s his turn to call the shots.

Pet play

Jimin is a huge switch. He likes following his whims and is overall a brat, who just does whatever he likes. So, when Princess comes out of the bathroom before bedtime and finds him lounging on the bed naked with a pair of cat ears, his collar and her riding crop waiting on her bedside table, she knows exactly the kind of treatment he’s trying to get. Nevertheless, when in that mood he turns into the most obedient little kitty, so vulnerable and frail that Princess knows she shall treat him with velvet gloves (haha). Literally.

Edging and overstimulation

Princess likes it when Jimin gets messy and whiny and loud. She likes listening to him whimpering and whining while she uses her vibrator on him and makes him cry. It makes her feel powerful. It also makes her ten times softer afterwards and she just loves it when he hits subspace so bad he starts calling her mommy and begging for her to make him cum.

Anal play

Both Princess and Jimin are okay with giving and receiving. Princess is especially in love with double penetration. Jimin is very okay with rimming and putt plugs.

Spanking

Jimin has never really had the courage to try getting spanked before. He had his first experience with Princess, directing her thought the scene. He had learnt basic directions in case he ever needed to teach his partner, but he never thought it would actually happen. From there he and Princess get more comfortable with spankings and get even more involved in impact play, still spankings stay Jimin’s favourite.

Degradation

When in dom mode, Jimin can be vitriolic in his remarks, praising Princess with the dirtiest taunts. Some name calling happens, but Jimin never lets that get too deep. He usually opts for a patronising behaviour that questions Princess’ ability to live without him, and usually avoids anything outright insulting.

Breast worship

Jimin loves Princess’ chest. He likes touching her breasts, more than anything else, but this doesn’t mean he won’t slap them, suck them and fuck them every now and then.

[Sorry if I didn’t write much, honestly I’m still figuring these two out. I think it has a lot to do with Jimin being just so... mercurial. I can’t find another word. He is the least “steady” character in my head. I don’t know. I’ve always had problems with understanding Libras. He’s just so moody and so... It’s frustrating. I just have so many vibes coming from him it’s too much.]

Taehyung and Lace

Voyeurism; exhibitionism

While Jimin lives to be watched, Taehyung is all about the art of watching. Taehyung needs to watch Lace. It doesn’t matter if she’s putting on her lipstick or washing the dishes or brushing her teeth or sucking his cock. He will study her like a painting hung in a museum until he can close his eyes and imagine her exist like a hologram in his head. He loves watching her during sex and he indirectly loves being watched by her too. Lace has never felt so beautiful.

Outdoor sex

I think they wouldn’t mind trying outdoor sex: the lack of available locations in Seoul initially discourages them, but as they start going on holidays together, geographic remoteness and private outdoor spaces start becoming characteristics these two actually look for in their ideal resort. Yes, they’re the type to fuck against a tree in the woods — or maybe on the beach, under the stars (with Lace taking the utmost care in making sure nothing goes wrong in terms of safety both to their healths and Taehyung’s career).

Cyber sex

With Taehyung travelling because of his job, it isn’t uncommon for him and Lace to become cyber sex experts. Not only he has videos of her safely stored away in a memory card he has basically stitched to his skin — he is hyperaware of it and they are extremely careful of anything that could possibly link the video to the two of them — but he's more than willing to plan videocalls where they can get carried away in front of the camera for the other's viewing pleasure.

Cockwarming

There’s nothing more relaxing and intimate to Taehyung and Lace than being physically connected after sex. After being so close, so together even for a rough, brief quickie, it is traumatic for them to part too suddenly, so usually Taehyung stays inside her for at least a bunch of minutes.

Oral fixation

Both Taehyung and Lace like putting their mouth on the other. Lace could live with Taehyung’s cock in her mouth, while he especially loves to bite her flesh, pretty much anywhere, or stare at her face while he suckles her breasts like a little boy. He could literally fall asleep while they’re facing each other, on their sides, suckling at her nipple while she handcombs his hair, the pressure slowly decreasing until he lets go completely, sound asleep.

Foot fetish

Both Taehyung and Lace are new to this and they're more than willing to explore. Expect Taehyung to grow increasingly addicted to them playing footsie underneath the dinner table, but also to get exceedingly turned on by having Lace's feet laying on his lap or crotch.

Squirting

Taehyung knows exactly how to touch Lace, massaging her after a long day, relaxing her whole body before his fingers end up inside her. His strong, sinewy fingers seem to be programmed to please her. Nevertheless, he is not prone to use this as a form of torture; he'd much rather use it to amplify Lace's sensitivity and help her reach further states of pleasure.

Anal play

I think Taehyung aims at possessing every inch of Lace's body, and of course he wouldn't mind one bit to rim, finger or fuck her ass. He'd be absolutely fine with buttplugs and double penetration. And don't think he would mind wearing a butt plug himself — I think he's the most likely to wear a tail-buttplug, probably. I also think he is by far the most comfortable with the idea of getting pegged: he knows his power and he knows it could never be undermined by Lace fucking him with her strap on.

Jungkook and Candy

Predator play

May it be playful or absolutely ruthless, Jeongguk loves hunting Candy inside his apartment. He loves playing hide and seek, he loves the rush he feels when he spots a hint, and he loves even more the adrenaline coursing through his body when he chases her down the corridor and picks her up, throwing her body over his shoulder — oh, and most of all he loves ripping her clothes off and taking her whenever he manages to catch her.

Corruption kink

Jeongguk’s predatory instincts get even louder when Candy is acting innocent, being her happy, playful, bubbly self. Go figure when she’s sleeping and her face is so soft and young and she has a slight pout and squishable cheeks: Jeongguk can feel his blood flood to all the right places, arousal and adrenaline mixing up, while his brain tries to stay calm, wake her up gently and ask for her consent.

Marking

It’s not that big of a thing to him, he might leave hickeys down Candy’s chest, but that’s mostly it. He’s shy and he’s not all that comfortable with other people seeing them. However, I decided to place this kink right here because bunny wants to be marked. He loves indentations and scratches coming from Candy’s medium-short nails. His all time favourite are scratches down his back, and small crescents on his shoulders and ass. Also lowkey scratches down his abs and thighs. He might go crazy the moment he’s not promoting or shooting and he can finally let Candy cover his chest in hickeys.

Degradation

When absolutely fucked out, Jeongguk starts rambling the most saccharine, degrading sentences to Candy. He has a rich collection of dirty pet names, sometimes with a patronising or humiliating undertone. He doesn’t do it coherently, he’s just not thinking and it feels that good. Of course he always apologises afterwards, but Candy has no shame whatsoever. He might apologise for calling her his fuckdoll, but she’s not ashamed of it, that’s exactly what she is. Hearing him speak those nasty words always gets her going since it shows how fucked out she’s getting him.

Praise

Jeongguk wants to be praised. His ego bursts when Candy praises him, openly or not. Candy whining while he hits the spot is one of the strongest praises she can offer him. He direly needs to be praised when in sub mode, matching the encouraging words with soothing touches and loving glances.

Mommy kink

Yes. They’re exploring a few things after it turned out Joengguk wanted to try. Apparently he’s enjoying way more than he expected. Especially when he’s playing chase with Candy and she grows tired, stomps her foot to the floor and gets her harsh tone on. He starts obeying in seconds. Overall a well.behaved baby, if a little lively and energetic.

Breast worship

Another great fan of boobs. He really loves fucking Candy’s tits, especially while she’s laying down and he’s sitting on top of her, straddling her ribs. His obsession worsens once she gets a nipple piercing: it becomes his favourite place to put his hand on before sleep.

Oral sex

Candy is the absolute grandmaster of blowjobs. She’s the non plus ultra. Blowjobs become Jeongguk’s favourite reward, especially when paired up with her cunt grinding against his face. He could die a happy man like that. After helping Candy get rid of her insecurities about being eaten out, Jeongguk decides he’d do that at least three times a week, almost planning a schedule to make sure he didn’t skip a day. He lowkey asks Yoongi for tips, trying to find new positions to test Candy’s resistance.

Cockwarming

Jeongguk gets very emotionally vulnerable after sex. He needs to talk about his insecurities and doubts, since he always feels so connected to Candy right in the aftermath. At the beginning, cockwarming is actually a consequence of him not realising he hasn’t pulled out as he rambles about everything that is going on inside his mind; however, as he gets used to that, he begins to do it willingly, feeling too naked and cold without staying inside her.

Multiple rounds

Jeongguk has a very high stamina. He can last two to three rounds — four if he’s going wild —, then go for some food, some water and/or a nap and be ready for more in a few hours. Candy is absolutely okay with it: he’s usually the one moving her like a puppet, so even if she’s exhausted, she doesn’t need to worry, he’ll do all the work.

Rough/animalistic sex

Jeongguk is not exceedingly into powerplay: any kind of power imbalance comes naturally, without any kind of planning or negotiating and what the others express in more niche activities, they simply express in very rough, very intense fucking. Especially when Jeongguk has just come home from the gym. Rather than using fancy toys or sophisticated practices, they much rather jump each other bones and fuck like rabbits (haha).

#bts smut #bts headcanons #bts drabbles #namjoon smut #seokjin smut #yoongi smut #hoseok smut #jimin smut #taehyung smut #jungkook smut #bts blog #namjoon x vixen #seokjin x angel #yoongi x kitten #hoseok x giggles #jimin x princess #taehyung x lace #jungkook x candy

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prose-for-hire · 4 years

Text

Choices

Pairing: Faith x reader

Request: i am so beyond thrilled requests are open again! when you have the time can you please do a faith x reader oneshot where the reader is a scooby and usually pretty ethical and trustworthy but they secretly date faith after she goes evil, preferably including angst with the other scoobys when they find out❤

Requested by: Anon

You liked to stick by the rules. You walked in the light. You weren’t a complete saint, of course. But you did pride yourself on being trustworthy. Your friends, the Scoobies, always came to you for advice.

You and Faith, in theory, appeared to be opposites. She was always so much more outgoing and cooler than most in the room. You were a lot more bookish and stereotypically ‘good’ than her. But you did compliment each other. You were both very caring people. You shared values and your humour complimented each other’s.

You found yourselves becoming closer and closer. Until the day she admitted she liked you. Kissed you. Ever since, you had lifted her up. Supported her when she thought you may turn from her.

You had both fallen so deeply. She had never felt this way before. It was everything. She couldn’t dare think about losing you. Much less because of her own actions. She would hate herself for it.

Faith had never had a relationship so good. You liked to communicate your feelings and always encouraged her to do the same. She had never been able to trust anyone in the way that she trusted you.

However, then you found out. About how she had hurt that man. About her working with the Mayor. When you found out what had happened with Faith, it hit you in the gut. Worried you.

Not for the reasons most may expect though. You worried for her safety. For what she was getting involved in. You wanted to wrap your arms around her, try to ground her the way she had for you so many times.

You saw her again but she hid behind that mask she usually used with the others. You hadn’t missed the way she hid those emotions. Your horror at what had happened had read to her as disgust. As if you no longer wanted to be with her. As if you hated her where there had only been love there before.

She was walking away from you, storming to her new apartment courtesy of the Mayor. Her eyes watering. Her heart in pieces. The only person she had ever trusted with her heart and now she had to face being alone again.

“Faith!” You shouted, rushing up behind her before she disappeared. She turned instantly, she always would for you.

“You’re here to end it, huh?” She said, looking at the floor, “Evil doesn’t really match the goody-schtick you have going on, right?”

“I can’t lose you Faith…” You admitted, your eyes welling with tears.

“Yeah, well, everyone leaves. Turns away. Gotta get used to it sometime right?”

“No! Please, don’t do this! I-I don’t want it to be like this…”

“Well, there’s no way you’re gonna turn from any of them – they were always your friends not mine”

“I won’t be able to stop being their friends, but I wanna be with you still… maybe we could… still?” “Uh, but… in secret?” You offered, cringing slightly. Hoping she wouldn’t laugh in your face. But she clung to it, near desperately. Her eyes brightened. Face appeared brightened by this hope.

She never thought you would say that. She adored you but she knew you well. Had expected you to be unable to see that things were grey not just black and white. Because of the way you always tried to be so good. Make the correct choices.

“You really mean it?”

You nodded vigorously to further your point. Eyes streaming with tears at even the idea of losing her. You wiped your eyes on your sleeve, facing her again.

“I can’t stand being without you”

“Even though I’m working with the Mayor, you can live with that, huh?”

You wrapped her in your arms, looking into her eyes the way you always did. Your love hadn’t changed. You had meant it when you said you would never leave her side. That nothing she could ever do would cease your love.

She wasn’t used to love in such an unconditional way. For someone to risk everything to be with her. Your friends, your morals, all of that was on the line. But you loved her. You needed her. Of course you would choose her. To stand by her.

You cupped her cheeks. Palms stroking either side of her face. You leaned in, pressing your lips to hers. It was slow and so gentle. Caressing her with such meaning. Full of your unending love. Your lips moved against hers in such doting display of affection. This kiss told her you would never leave. Never turn from her just because of her mistakes. Choices.

She wasn’t used to such tenderness. She was so overcome with emotion. You meant everything to her.

You would still help your friends and act as you always did. You wouldn’t help the Mayor although you had met him several times now. Under Faith’s protection. You would just be by her side. You loved her, how could you not?

You sat in the library, mostly silent now. You were still your usual friendly self but it you were just a lot quieter. They had been discussing Faith. Again. And you hadn’t really been listening until Buffy’s voice could be heard louder than the rest.

“Yeah, well, now she’s gone total psycho-gal there’s nothing we can do” Buffy said and the force of her words made you wince. You had audibly gasped without realising and everyone looked at you awkwardly. Realising what they had said. How fresh this must be for you.

“I’m sorry, Y/n, we’re here if you need to talk” They mistook your discomfort for heartbreak. And you let them. Just nodding in reply.

Truth was, you were counting down the minutes. Until you saw her again. You couldn’t help it. No matter how your choices now conflicted, she meant everything to you.

You had been daydreaming again. Of the way she enjoyed to slide a hand around your shoulder so that she could lean in closer and press a kiss to the side of your face. How she could whisper things in your ear. Sometimes teasing and too dirty to ever repeat, sometimes unbelievably soft things that could make you blush just as big.

Finally, it was the best part of the day. The bell went and you rushed out of the exit as soon as you could. Straight to her. You heart would beat faster the closer you got to her.

You smiled at her, entering her new place. It was plush and although you knew how she got it, you couldn’t help but enjoy it with her.

She kissed you on the lips, that smirk on her face that she did with the side of her mouth when she had you alone. She was exited to see you, had been alone most of the day. She lead you to her bed, pressing a few kisses to your mouth between the run-down of her day.

You lay in bed together as she showed you the large plasma tv that hung on the wall opposite. You loved it when she was excited this way. You didn’t get to see it often. Her showing you the items she had never owned before. You loved how fun she could be. You settled against her. Just cuddling and sharing your thoughts on the day until you decided to turn to watch the tv.

Your hand rubbing slowly against her upper arm. She enjoyed the sensation. Enjoyed the way nothing had changed for you. You really did still love her. You scooped her into your arms, holding her into you further.

You only wanted to spend time with her. Wanted to make her feel so very loved. She felt herself physically relax. Her jaw loosening, shoulders relaxed.

She grinned at the way you cuddled up to her. She began pressing slow kisses against your neck. Your hand slid to weave between her hair. The way you always did when she got this way. She really loved you. Wanted to show you at any opportunity.

Her body heat and yours, skin against skin. It was pure bliss when it was just the two of you. There was no good or evil. No right or wrong. Just this deep, all-encompassing connection.

She used to use people for sex and then move on so quickly. Before she had found happiness. Before she had found you.

Having you didn’t change her choices or that she had changed sides. But it did change how she felt about herself. She still had your love, your affection. You couldn’t leave her side despite the fact she knew you didn’t agree with her choices.

She moved, your embrace loosening as she pressed herself into you further, one hand now guiding your jaw to face her properly. So that she could kiss your lips fully. You grasped at the strands of hair weaved between your fingers, pulling her closer still.

It was bliss.

That was, until an uninvited visitor arrived. Buffy had kicked the door in as Faith had rolled over so that she was above you in bed.

You both looked over to the door, eyes widened. You had been caught out. Nobody had known about your continued relationship, you had kept it well hidden.

Both of your eyes widened from your compromising position. There was no way you could just explain this away.

“Oh my God, what is happening?!”

“Yeah, guys, could the Hellmouth finally be giving us opposite day?”

“Well, that would make me the good Slayer and you the-”

“You’re not bad” You hissed in her ear as she slid from the position she had been in to sit on the edge of her bed. Staring at the intruders. She felt so vulnerable. So scared they were going to take you from her.

“No way! No way would they give you the time of day now that you’re bad-”

“Please, don’t wig, we’re just… I couldn’t just leave her! She’s not a bad person!”

“Oh, right, she convince you of that between the soulless gropy-ness?”

“Didn’t realise there was a big book of big, bad deception now that we don’t know about. She lend you a copy?” Buffy said, her tone harder than she had ever directed at you before.

“It does kinda seem like she’s clouded your brain with… smooches” Willow added, looking at the floor. She didn’t like confrontation.

“She’s been there for me when nobody else-”

“We’re your friends! All she’s ever done is wrecked your life!”

“Yeah, Y/n, didn’t know you could even consider moving over to the dark side” Xander said, trying to aim for light hearted but it quickly rounded into sounding accusatory. As if they were all so disappointed in you.

That it had been expected of Faith, that she was a ticking time-bomb. But they drew the line at you being ‘dragged down’ to her level.

“Hey, it didn’t mean anything, okay? I just, it was just to end it. Get it outta our system, y’know? Right, y/n/n?” Faith offered. The group still didn’t like this and would likely not let you off for a month, but it meant you would at least get them back as friends eventually.

She didn’t ever want to be the reason you lost your friends. Not over her, she didn’t feel like she was worth it at all. You gave her a look and she nodded once, showing that it was okay. That she understood.

Her eyes were glassy and you had never seen her cry before. She was always so strong. Never wanted you to see her emotional, to admit it. But you could tell that over this – over you, her eyes were welling up.

“No” You said suddenly. Everyone’s faces a picture of shock. They couldn’t believe that you, of all people could be so firm about this despite everything you knew about Faith and what she had done.

You moved to stand by her side, your hand slid into hers. You squeezed slightly, showing her you meant this. That you would always be here, no matter what. That you loved her because of who she was no matter what choices she had made.

“I love Faith. I don’t care anymore, I choose her. I’ll always choose her.” You insisted, “A-and if this isn’t the ‘right’ choice then… then I don’t want to be good anymore”

There was a stony silence where you felt the tension rising uncomfortably. The room that had been glowing with love was now heating with anger. Disapproval. Near-hatred for your words.

They were angry with you. Their faces at different levels of seething. You, doing this, was a worse betrayal to them than to Faith switching sides. You suddenly felt unsafe with them where you never had before with your friends. You stepped back, unconsciously. Trying to shield yourself from them with Faith.

How could friends of yours change their mind of you so easily?

“Then you choose to be beaten. I can’t promise I won’t fight you if it means doing what’s right - and I mean properly right” Buffy warned. But for today, with this devastating blow – of losing you as a friend in their eyes. They just left.

Left you with Faith, which would never be a penance to you. You adored her. She instantly moved to your side, she had left a little space in case your proximity would have created a worse argument.

She never wanted you hurt. She comforted you, enveloping you in her arms. Walking you back to the bed. Your safety. Just you and her. The idea of losing your friends had devastated you. You felt pushed out, hated. You couldn’t help how deeply you felt for Faith. You knew you would do the exact same thing over again.

You had meant it. You had made your choice. You chose Faith. Always.

#Faith lehane #Faith lehane x reader #Faith x reader #Faith lehane imagine #Faith imagine #Faith lehane x you #Faith x you #Faith #btvs #btvs x reader #btvs imagine #btvs x you #Buffy The Vampire Slayer #buffy the vampire slayer imagines #gn #gender neutral

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imagines-r-s · 3 years

Text

sticking it - j. farabee

chapter 8

a/n: idk why this chapter took so long, but here it is. it’s very domestic and wholesome, so enjoy it. honestly i’m sad we’re so close to the series ending, but there will be more y/n and joel from the sticking it au i promise. and as always, lmk what you all think

taglist: @butgilinsky @barbienoturbby @sunsetholland @lovenhlboys @sortagaysortahigh @hockey-racing-fubol @oopsiedoopsie23 @iwantahockeyhimbo @dreamsndior @itsurgirlgracie @heartshapedkissxs @lwstuff

warnings: more high school musical references, a sprinkle of angst, friends fighting, idk if it counts as an innuendo or suggestive content, but some of that (not a warning, but Adrian content and ‘no thoughts, head empty’ Joel)

sticking it masterlist

wc: 6.1k

“All I’m saying is that it doesn’t make sense that she’s the only one standing, singing to Troy about scoring a basket. Like what if someone showed up to the game late and didn’t get the memo to twist the signs around and stay seated, you know? And it’s not just Gabriella standing up,” you said, grabbing multiple outfits to choose from for the movie night that you had been invited to.

“Well, I don’t think that it was really an ‘ok, everybody. One person is going to be staying up, but everybody else stay seated and lift your sign’ sorta thing. I feel like it was just a heat of the moment thing,” Joel replied as he walked out of the bathroom.

“Yeah, but it still doesn’t make sense. And I’m curious to know if that mid-game duet actually motivated Troy or if he was just annoyed or something.”

“If you sang to me mid-game, I would honestly probably throw a stick at you. Out of love, obviously.”

“That’s sweet of you, not really, but I’ll take it,” you said, turning towards Joel, “I don’t know what to wear to movie night.”

“It’s not really like you have to try to impress anyone, it’s just movie night,” Joel said, as he scrolled on his phone, “but you look hot in anything, so I’m chilling.”

“You’re definitely just saying that,” you said, rolling your eyes.

“Yeah, you’re right. You in the mornings is kinda concerning, not your best look,” he said, pointedly.

“That was not an opportunity for you to say something like that, I will throw a chair at you.”

“That’s concerning, but well deserved. I’m sure it would be out of the kindness of your heart, so I respect it.”

“You better respect it, Farabee.”

“Oooh, the last name. I’m shaking in my boots,” he said to which you immediately shot a glare his way, “actually, you’re very hot when you’re mad, not gonna lie.”

“Better watch yourself, Beezer, you’re on thin ice,” you said, jokingly.

“Good thing I know how to skate, babe,” he retorted, making his way towards you.

“You’re annoying,” you huffed as Joel wrapped his arms around you in a bear hug, “Bee, you better stop.” He lightly pecked the top of your head before stepping back, “wait, what was that?”

“What? The hug or me kissing the top of your head?”

“Both?”

“It’s called a display of affection. I know you aren’t familiar since you show your love by threatening to throw chairs at the people you care about, but that’s what that was.”

“Oh, it was nice,” you said, which caused Joel to chuckle.

“God, I love you,” he paused for a moment, clearly contemplating something, “this is kinda random, but have you ever thought about posting about our relationship? Or is that a no in the gymnastics world?”

“I mean, yeah, I have thought about it. I just haven’t because I didn’t know how you felt, but if you want to post it you can.”

“Why don’t you post it first?”

“Why don’t you? You brought it up?” you questioned.

“You confuse me so much sometimes and I’m usually confused, so it makes it kinda worse,” he said honestly.

“How about whenever we get back here tonight, we post at the same time?” you offered.

“Sounds okay with me. Come on, we have to go if we want to make it on time,” he said, softly.

…..

“Hey, it’s Short Stack and Beezer,” Travis said, as he opened his front door.

“I still don’t know why you of all people call me Short Stack, Tiki Bar,” you said to which he simply shrugged before opening the door more to let the two of you in.

“Ooh, Short Stack, Karly has something for you. I think she went upstairs,” you sent a confused look to Travis, “it’s nothing bad, just go.” You rolled your eyes as you made your way up the steps.

“Karly?” you called as you walked closer to her and Travis’ room.

“I’m in here,” she called. As you walked into her room, you quickly noticed her shuffling through the things in her closet, pulling out a box that had clearly been wrapped in a hurry.

“What’s that?”

“Just open it, I hope you like it,” she rushed.

“Um, alright,” you tore off the wrapping paper and opened the box to reveal what looked like a regular denim jacket, “a denim jacket?” you said, earning an eye roll from her.

“Take it out of the box, Sunshine.” You picked up the corners of the jacket to see that there were multiple patches with the flyers logo and bees on the sleeves, turning it around to see a number 86 and Farabee on the back.

“Karly, wha-”

“Look, I know you and him haven’t announced it officially yet or anything like that, but I figured that you would like it. I even got the bees on there for obvious reasons. I wouldn’t be upset if you didn’t wear it out, but you needed one,” she said, gently.

“I- Wow, I love it, Karly. Thank you,” you said, giving her a quick hug.

“You should wear it downstairs or at least show him at some point.”

“Oh no, I was just going to keep it in a bag in my closet for a while until he inevitably finds it,” you said, sarcastically.

“No need for the sass, Sunshine. You should try it on though, I want to see what it looks like,” she suggested, her smile only growing as she saw that it looked amazing on you, “oh yes, the bee patches really add to it. Definitely a great choice on my part.”

“Always the humble one. Come on, we have to start the movies eventually.”

“Wait, you’re wearing it downstairs?” she asked, to which you simply nodded as you walked ahead of her down the stairs.

Travis was the first to notice your arrival downstairs as he talked to Joel, smiling as he saw that you were wearing the jacket that his girlfriend had stressed over for days, “hey, y/n, I’m really liking this new look.”

“Hey man,” Joel started as he had his back turned towards you, quickly turning around after hearing that you arrived downstairs, “watch yours-” He immediately recognized that similar jacket that many of his teammates significant other wore to games, a perfect sign showing off their boyfriend or husband. “Wait, hold up.”

“Yes,” you answered, already knowing what he was going to ask.

“Swag,” he answered simply as he walked closer to you to examine the jacket. “Are those bees? Why are there bees?”

“Hmm, no idea. They’re just randomly there,” you retorted.

“Beezer, did you get knocked in the head at practice or something? I’m very concerned, dude,” Nicole asked from beside Nolan.

“Why are there bees? I don’t understand,” he asked, frantically.

“He’s hopeless,” Nolan whispered to Nicole.

“Bee, did you forget your own name?” you asked.

“Bee,” he paused, “ohhhh, that’s me. Those are for me, wait, turn around,” you rolled your eyes as you turned around to see the back of the jacket, “oh, that’s my name.”

“Yeah, no shit, Sherlock,” Kevin said, concerned from the whole exchange.

“He’s just having one of his moments. Be nice, Kev,” you said, holding back a laugh as you turned back towards your boyfriend who looked like there was something wrong, “Bee, you okay?”

“Yeah, yeah, I just- you got my name on a jacket. You usually aren’t this nice, but this is something nice, so I’m just worried something is wrong with you,” he said, genuinely.

You visibly gaped as the guys around you howled in laughter as Karly spoke up, “technically, I got her the jacket, she’s just wearing it.”

“Ohhh, okay, that makes more sense.”

“Damn, y/n/n, how badly do you treat the poor kid?” Scott asked from the couch.

“Better watch yourself, Scotty,” you said, shooting him a glare.

“Let’s just get the movie started before Short Stack attacks someone,” Travis added.

Drawing names to see who would pick the movie, Nicole picked out the movie, Stick It, which had always been one of her favorites. It was expected for people to be getting up during the movie, but when you noticed Nicole missing from seeing her favorite movie, you became worried that something had happened, “psst, did you see where Nicole went?” you whispered over to Joel.

“No, did you see where Nolan went?” he asked you, which caused you to grow suspicious as you noticed both of them were gone. “Maybe they’re just making out in the kitchen or something?”

“Why would they be making out? They’re just friends.”

“Dude, they’re still friends in the same way you and me are still friends.”

“No, because if something were going on she would tell me and I think it would be obvious.”

“Look, I know I’m oblivious, but you choose to ignore a lot of obvious details just because.”

“Yeah, whatever.”

“Fine, if we get up and find them together or doing something romantic? I don’t know, but either way, you have to post that we’re together first, but I choose the caption.”

“Is that a bet?”

“Yes,” to which the two of you shook on it.

“Hey guys, how many of you think there’s something going on with Nolan and Nicole?” Joel asked the group.

“Oh, yeah, I’ve noticed for months, they just haven’t done anything about it out of fear of what y/n will think,” Karly said like it was some simple statement.

“What do you mean that they fear what I would think?” you asked, causing everyone to look at you.

“Short Stack, you are literally this little spitfire that could attack at any moment, they just don’t want to upset you,” Travis added just as the pair walked back into the living room, “ah, here’s the two lovebirds now.”

A flash of panic crossed Nicole’s face as Nolan blushed, “no, I just needed help getting drinks and Nolan was right there.”

“Okay, then where are the drinks and why does Nolan have a hickey?” Scott pointed out.

“I forget them in the kitchen and Nolan burnt himself with a curling iron,” she offered.

“Karly, did you leave your curling iron in the kitchen again? Silly goose,” Travis said.

Joel quickly noticed how quiet you were from beside him, “hey, babe. What’s wrong?”

“I’m okay, I’m going to go and get a drink really quick,” you said, softly smiling before heading into the kitchen. Everyone’s eyes followed you as you retreated back to the kitchen, Nicole sighed, the guilt of not telling you finally hitting her.

“Do you want me to come with you?” Nolan offered.

“No, this is definitely between the two of us,” she answered before following you, “y/n/n, look-”

“Nicole, it’s fine,” you said, filling a cup with ice.

“It’s obviously not, I know you better than that,” she said, gently, waiting for a response from you, “look, this honestly hasn’t gone to anything serious yet because I knew I needed to tell you. I know I shouldn’t have kept it from you and that you would have been fine with it, we just didn’t want anyone to know. No one really knew, Karly just picked up on it because she’s Karly and everyone else figured it out. And I know you knew something was going on, you just didn’t want to accept it.”

“I don’t have an issue with it, I would have rather you just tell me straight up what’s happening, but I had to find out because Joel made a joke and you couldn’t give Nolan a hickey where it wasn’t visible,” you said honestly, filling your cup with water.

“I’m sorry. I don’t know what else to offer, there wasn’t really another reason other than we didn’t know how you would react,” she said, leaning back on the kitchen counter as you stared at the cup in your hand, “y/n/n, please say something. I’ll break it off if-”

“I would never make you break things off with him and you know that. How long has this been going on?”

“Uh, we’ve liked each other for a while, but didn’t do anything about it until you had to go back on crutches, so maybe a few weeks.”

“Gotcha, gotcha.”

“Are you mad at us? It was my idea, Nolan said we should just tell you, but-”

“Nic, please. I’m not mad, I knew something was up, I was just more focused on other things. Does he make you happy?” you asked, looking back up at her, smiling at the small blush that had rushed up to her face.

“Yeah, he really does.”

“Then, I’m chilling. Come on, you already missed half of your favorite movie making out with Nols,” she laughed as the two of you made your way back.

“You good, y/n/n?” Kevin asked as you sat by Joel again, who wrapped his arms around your shoulder.

“Maybe you should ask Nicole, just to make sure y/n/n didn’t attack her,” Scott added.

“Eh, I’ve known her for years, I have a few strategies,” Nicole said, simply.

“Oh, shut up, Nicky,” you said, jokingly rolling your eyes.

“I know damn well that you did not just say Nicky,” she said, shocked.

“Oh, did I?”

“You want to take this outside, babe.”

“Hmm, maybe tomorrow.”

“I’m concerned, but this is entertaining,” Travis said, to which everyone else agreed.

“I’ll record it and post it on world-star,” Joel added.

“Thanks, babe. Oh and Patty Lapone, if you hurt her, I will bust your kneecaps,” you said, faking sweetness.

“Understandably, so,” Nolan said, honestly.

“Glad we’re on the same page. And Nicky, don’t hurt him either.”

“Noted,” Nicole said.

“Hey babe, you know you have to post us first now, right?” Joel said, smirk growing on his face, “and I get to choose the caption.”

“You’re letting him choose the caption?” Karly asked, “good luck, Sunshine.”

…..

“So, do you know what picture you’re going to post? I have mine picked out,” Joel asked you as you finished your night routine.

“I’m still upset that you won that bet, but probably the picture of us that’s my wallpaper,” you said, patting your face dry.

“What picture?” Joel asked, confused as to what you meant.

“Oh, Karly took a bunch of pictures the day we were at the lake and the one that’s my wallpaper is the one where you’re about to throw me in the water and I’m laughing at you. Or I might post one of the pictures Nicole took of us where I’m wearing your jersey,” you explained.

“Ok, one, why haven’t I seen these and two, why didn’t you send me them?”

“Oh, I don’t know, you never asked.”

“I never knew.”

“Same thing?” you offered before walking out of the bathroom to sit on your bed as Joel grabbed his bag to start packing for the next day.

“Ok, well get the post ready and I’ll caption it,” Joel said, holding his hand out.

“Please keep it reasonable, I am an example to tiny humans.”

“Kids?”

“Same thing,” you said, handing your phone over to him, already open to instagram.

Joel had been thinking about what he would caption this post for the rest of the day after you had talked about going public. Quickly typing up the caption and tagging himself, he posted it, “okay, all done.”

“It didn’t take you that long?”

“Yeah, I know. I kinda figured it out earlier,” he said, shrugging and handing you back your phone. As you saw the notifications for the post, you opened it to see the picture of you two captioned ‘the bee to my honey’.

“That is so incredibly cheesy and adorable,” you said, smiling at your phone, “Karly already commented upset that you didn’t give her photo credit though, but she said the caption wasn’t terrible.”

“Yeah, I’m so good with words, babe. We’ve established this.”

“You’re truly something. Wait, are you captioning yours ‘the honey to my bee’ because that way it’s just in reverse?”

“Yeah, we’re just that cool,” Joel said, handing you his packing list, “will you go over this with me to make sure I have everything?”

“Superstitious King, ok, um, your garment bag with your suit?” you continued down the list as you heard him respond to everything you said, “Glasses? Glasses? Why do you have glasses on this list?”

“Because I need them to see?” he said, confused by your question.

“Since when have you worn glasses?”

“A while actually, I just don’t wear them all that often,” he shrugged.

“Wait, what do they look like on you?” you asked, watching as he contemplated showing you before reaching in his bag and grabbing his glasses case.

“If you make any jokes, I will never wear them around you again,” he said before putting them on. “Ok, one joke, and that’s all.” He was shocked by how quiet you were, “y/n/n, please just make the joke already while I’m prepared for it.”

“Oh no, I actually don’t have a joke this time. You look really good in glasses.”

“Oh, a compliment?”

“Ha ha, yeah, I can be nice sometimes. But no, you genuinely look hot in those, you look hot in general, but like, now especially,” you continued rambling.

“Awe, you’re being nice and I made you nervous,” he cooed.

“You don’t make me nervous, Farabee,” you said, rolling your eyes.

“Oh, I don’t? Okay,” he took steps closer to you standing in front of you and placing his arms on either side of you, smirking as he heard your breath hitch, “you sure I don’t make you nervous?”

“Y-you don’t,” you replied, watching his actions closely as he leaned his face closer to yours, placing his hand on your thigh before leaning beside your ear.

“Okay, then,” he whispered before standing back up to finish packing, a smirk lacing his features.

“That was rude,” you pouted, to which he simply shrugged. “Yeah, that’s not going to work, babe. Karma is a real thing,” you said, watching as he furrowed his brows.

“What do you mean?”

“Karma,” you said, before just grabbing a longer shirt of his for pajamas and heading to the bathroom to change. Coming back minutes later to see Joel in bed, leaning against the headboard, already looking your way.

“y/n,” he said, cautiously, “please say there’s something underneath my shirt.”

“I don’t know, Bee, is there?” you asked, pulling the comforter back on your bed as you laid down for bed.

“I don’t like this game, it’s not that fun,” he said, moving down to lay his head on your chest, your hand instinctively going to his hair.

“Karma is karma, pretty boy,” you said, chuckling when you felt him start to trace patterns on your thigh, obviously looking for a way to tell if you had shorts on. “You have to be up in a few hours and Kevin and Nol will barge in here tomorrow morning if you aren’t on time.”

“Yeah, yeah, yeah. Are you going to answer my question?”

“You didn’t ask a question.”

“You’re really annoying sometimes. Are you going to answer my statement?”

“You still love me though and I won’t answer your statement,” you said, softly, knowing that he was ready to fall asleep. “Goodnight, Bee.”

“Goodnight, babe.”

The alarm for the start of Joel’s day went off way too soon, but he knew he needed to get up. Quickly turning off his alarm to avoid waking you up, he got up to get his shower and get dressed for his day.

After getting a text from Nolan that they would be at your door in about 5 minutes, he decided to tell you goodbye, “y/n/n, baby, it’s time for me to go.”

“You don’t have to go, tell them you can’t go,” you said, half asleep, barely even realizing what you were saying.

“As much as I wish I could, it doesn’t work like that, babe.”

“Well have you tried to see if it would work?” he chuckled at your question.

“I love you and I’ll see you in a few days, alright,” he kissed the top of your head before grabbing his bags and heading out to the living room to wait on Kevin and Nolan. Taking a seat on the couch as he waited, he heard the bedroom door open with footsteps following, “you should go back to sleep.”

“I have to go to PT in a few hours, so might as well be up,” you said, “plus, I kinda want to say bye to Kev and Nols.”

“You have PT at noon, it’s almost 5am. Once we leave, please try to get some sleep.”

“Awe, Bee, you worried about me?”

“Unfortunately I’m always worried about you and you’re such a chaotic person that it’s reasonable and the concern only ever grows.”

“That’s true, I am kinda chaotic,” you said, causing him to chuckle.

“Just a tad.”

The sound of the key turning and door opening drew yours and Joel’s attention away from each other for a moment, “sup, bitches,” Kevin’s voice rang out.

“What the fuck, Kev?” you asked, grabbing a blanket from your couch, wrapping it around you.

“Rise and shine, y/n/n. Hope you slept well, now we have to leave, so say bye to your boy,” Kevin added, turning back to leave again.

“Ok, I have to get going, shawty bae. Go get some sleep, text me how PT goes, and tell Adrian I said hi. Bye, babe,” he kissed the top of your head once more before grabbing his bag and heading on his way.

…..

“So, no lover boy today?” Adrian asked as you stepped into his office.

“No, not today,” you said, sitting down on the bench, “him and the boys have an away game tonight, so they left this morning and will be back in a few days.”

“So, I assume things are going well?” he asked, rolling his chair over to you.

“Yeah, things are going very well. We posted about us being together officially on instagram last night.”

“Oh, wow. Instagram, that’s crazy,” he said, sarcastically.

“Hey, shush. It’s a bigger step than you think.”

“Oh, yes. The power couple that you two athletes are, hmm. Forgot about that.”

“Stop, it’s not that crazy. It just kinda is a big step in my opinion.”

“Well, I am happy for you and I’m also proud of you for actually listening to me and staying off your knee.”

“Hey, that rhymed,” you softly interrupted.

“Ha ha, so funny. Anyways, with how it looks now, I say you’re good to start training again,” he said, taking the time to examine your knee. He could tell that you had actually listened to what he had told you, just like he hoped you had. He was excited to see you back to where you needed to be.

“Like training training? Or just training?”

“Training training. Just be careful and don’t overwork yourself. I am aware that there isn’t much time before you have the U.S Championships, but don’t rush it. Take your time. Quality over quantity. Okay, Superstar?”

“Yeah, yeah, of course,” you said, excitedly, jumping off the bench to hug Adrian, “thank you.”

“Hey, I didn’t do anything, this is all you. But if anyone can do this, you can. Just take care of yourself, alright? I don’t want all my work to go to waste,” he said, jokingly.

“Wow, I see how it is. I see how it is.”

“You know I’m joking, Superstar. Don’t even.”

“Do I, Adrian? Do I know that?”

“Just leave already,” he joked, “you have a lot of work to catch up on. Good luck, y/n/n.”

Knowing that the boys were either at lunch, wrapping up morning skate, or getting settled, you shot Kevin a quick text to call you whenever he had the chance; your phone rang only a few minutes later. “Hey, is everything okay?” Kevin’s concerned voice rang through.

“Yeah, yeah. I’m fine. Adrian cleared me to train again.”

“Aye, let’s go. Alright, so you have like, what? Two weeks before you leave for the U.S. Championships?”

“Yeah, Marcus and Michelle already figured out all my travel arrangements months ago, so no worries there. I’m just worried about the fact that I have about 12 practices, but Marcus will probably worry and have me practice less, so about 10 practices? And what if-” you rambled.

“No, we’re not doing the ‘what if’ conversations right now. Or anytime soon for that matter. You’ll get it. And if you have to simplify it for now, then that’s how it’ll be, but you stressing out right now is not going to change the number of practices you have or how they go. Only you can be the one to determine how practices go.”

“Since when did you get all wise, Kev?”

“I read this really inspirational fortune cookie earlier, it caused me to have a whole epiphany on life. Same old, same old.”

“Alright, wasn’t expecting that one, but I’m here for it. What are you guys up to?”

“What are we up to? Or what is Beezer up to?” Kevin asked, knowingly.

“I was honestly just asking in general, but since you brought him up-” the two of you took a little bit of time to catch up. Him filling you in on how morning skate went and how the lineups for the game were looking. He also told you how the team was looking good this morning and that if they played how they needed to, they could easily win.

You were still on the phone with Kevin by the time you pulled into the gym parking lot, “hey, I have to talk to Marcus about training, but I’ll probably talk to you after the game. Tell Bee I’ll talk to him later too. Bye, Kev.”

“Stay safe, be careful, make wise choices. I’ll talk to you later, y/n/n.”

Walking into the gym this time was different, almost similar to your first time back after everything, but right now you had the ability to train and to work how you needed to. You just needed to get back into your element.

Knowing that the only practice going on was for the younger kids, you made your way up to Marcus’ office. Knocking gently on the door, you opened it to see him and Michelle sitting near his desk. “So, what’s the verdict?” Marcus asked, expectantly.

“Well, there’s two weeks until Championships and I need to get this dismount,” you said, watching as the two of their smiles only grew. As the three of you went over everything that Adrian said, the three of you planned out the next two weeks.

“Alright, Monday, Wednesday, and Friday morning practices, you can spend the whole practice on beam, drills, and conditioning, but afternoon practices you need to do other events. Then, Tuesday and Thursdays will be working on other events, and Saturdays is just a markthrough day for routines,” Michelle explained easily, which showed that they had already thought of this beforehand.

“And we’re going to ease into it again, but this time from doubles. We both know you can easily get back to where you need to and we also believe that with how determined you seem right now, you’ll be fine. If you do okay with doubles, we’ll move onto triples as soon as we can. If anyone can do it, you can,” Marcus said, honestly.

…..

Checking his phone after the game was over, the smile on Joel’s face quickly grew at all the encouraging texts he had gotten from you. Quickly replying, he looked up to see most of the guys sharing knowing looks, “what?”

“Nothing, we can just easily tell who texted you from the way you looked at your phone,” Nolan pointed out.

“You don’t really hide it, so it’s kinda obvious,” Carter added.

“Well yeah, I don’t have a reason to hide it. My girl makes me happy,” Joel said, turning to see Kevin giving him a pointed look, “okay, maybe one reason to hide it.”

“Didn’t she have a PT appointment today? Any updates?” Scott asked, walking towards the younger guys.

“Oh, yeah. She got cleared and starts training again tomorrow,” Joel answered, causing all the team to smile.

Rushing to finish getting ready, so that he could FaceTime you, he grabbed his bag and made his way to an empty hallway to talk to you. The phone rang only a few times before you picked up, “hey, baby. You did really good at your game.”

“Thank you, thank you. I was thinking of you when I scored,” he said, watching behind you to see you walking around the apartment.

“That was really cheesy.”

“Yeah, I realized that after I said it, but it’s the thought that counts,” he retaliated, causing you to chuckle, “did you get everything figured out with your coaches to start practicing again?”

“Babe, you just won a game and you’re worried about my PT and training schedule?”

“Well, I don’t have an explanation, but I get hockey 24/7 for the next few days, so I kinda want to hear about your life and gymnastics,” he said, honestly, which only made you smile.

“Yeah, we got my training schedule figured out. I start practice again in the morning, but luckily I was able to work it out to where I have a day of just beam work to mostly do the dismount and drills and then the rest of the week is for other events. But I will have to travel for this meet, which I haven’t had to do in a while.”

“Oh, it’s in Texas? Right?” he asked, causing you to hum in agreement, “and how long before you leave?”

“Well, I leave the Wednesday night before, podium training on Thursday, and then, competition Friday and Sunday. And then I’ll be back Monday.”

“Ah, so I get to know how you feel when I’m on the road.”

“Yep, and you’ll know much it sucks,” you said, rolling your eyes.

You were happy that Joel was happy and playing the sport that he loved, but him being on the road often threw off the routine that the two of you had with each other. Waking up next to each other; either making or getting breakfast; him driving you to practice before going to his; jamming out to music as the two of you prepared for your day; the list goes on.

“Awe, you just miss me so much. It’s understandable really.”

“Don’t get cocky, Farabee,” you said.

“It’s okay to admit that you-”

“Bee, I will hang up on you,” you threatened.

“Babe, you would miss me too much,” he said, making you roll your eyes once again.

“Bye, Beezer,” you said, hitting the end call button.

He simply smiled at the action, knowing well enough that if he called back you would decline and that you were too stubborn to call him back. Quickly sending you a goodnight text, he made his way back to the locker room, not missing all the chirps the boys had to say in response.

…..

You spent the Monday and Wednesday of that week working on drills to be able to do the dismount. With the boys still gone until Friday, you spent your practices wisely and used any extra time that you could at the gym. Your routines were getting back to where they needed to be and you couldn’t have been happier. The drills that you were doing to work your dismount were also working out very well.

“I want you to try a few triple dismounts. Just a triple and by tomorrow I want you to go for the 3.5 twist. The drills you’re doing aren’t really doing anything at this point, you’ve basically mastered them. So, I do believe if you really work towards it, you could get the quad twist by Olympic Trials, you will compete a 3.5 for U.S. Championships, but with the way practices are going I firmly believe the quad is only a few tries away from you,” Marcus told you as you did your beam warm up.

“Marcus, I-”

“You’re doing the dismount,” Michelle added as she passed by.

“Just go for a triple, that’s all I want to see today. Once you do one, you’ll get back in the groove of things and you’ll be able to do more than one today. You got this, y/n/n, I know you can, you just have to get past the mental block.”

You knew he was right. As you thought about the skill, you knew it was basically a step away from you. If you went for it, with the way the drills are looking, you would have it. And from there, it’s just the 3.5 and then more work towards the quad. You knew you had the skills, you just had to remind your body of that fact.

Taking a deep breath, you started your beam routine. Hitting all the skills that you had, you made your way back and forth on the beam until you got the the start of your dismount. “C’mon, y/n, you got it. Just breathe,” you heard Marcus as you took another breath before starting the dismount. Going for the roundoff, you started for the twisting part of the dismount, watching and twisting three times, you opened up, shocked when you landed the dismount.

“Twinkle Toes,” Marcus beamed, “you did it.”

“Huh?” you said, realizing what you did, “wait. I did it.”

“You did the triple. I knew you could. I need you to do a few more, just to create the habit. Land at least five and then switch to bars.”

“Alright, yeah,” you answered, quickly realizing that you were one step closer to your goal. Doing the next five took a little bit of time, but you were getting used to the landing and the skill itself. After finishing, you moved onto bars.

“Did I see a triple dismount?” Nicole asked as you walked over to the chalk box.

“Maybe you did, maybe you didn’t,” you said, shrugging.

“Does that mean you’re trying the 3.5 again soon?”

“Most likely tomorrow. You will be seeing it soon, I promise.”

…..

When Joel noticed that he got home early enough to come surprise you at practice, he jumped at the chance. Quickly dragging Nolan and Kevin with him - considering they were his ride - he asked them to head to the gym. Once they entered, they got settled in the overhead seating area, he quickly found you standing with Marcus near the beam.

“C’mon, Twinkle Toes, in order to get the dismount back, you have to get on the beam,” he heard Marcus say.

“Look, trust the process. I’m mentally preparing for it before I go for it.”

“Are you actually going to get on the beam at some point today? Or will you still be mentally preparing by the end of practice?”

“Shush, it won’t take me that long, I promise,” Marcus sighed.

“Just get on the beam, that’s all I need.”

“Alright,” you got onto the beam, walking towards the end as you prepared for the dismount.

“Ok, just keep the same habits, just twist faster and open up a little bit later, you got it,” Marcus reassured you. Taking a deep breath, you prepped for the dismount. “C’mon, Twinkle Toes.”

Joel and the boys watched closely as you went through your habit of mentally visualizing first, watching you go for the round off and start twisting. “Wait, she’s going for the 3.5,” Kevin said. The three of them all held a breath as they watched you go for the dismount, letting out the breath when you landed it.

You landed it. “Wait, I did it. Marcus, I did it.”

“I told you so, your boys are watching by the way,” Marcus said, causing you to look up to see the boys smiling to which you simply waved, “I need you to do some more of those either today or tomorrow, but you can go see your boy.”

Rushing over to the stairs to go see Joel, he met you at the bottom of the staircase, “hey, honey.”

“Hey, Bee.”

“You did the dismount,” he said, smiling.

“I did the dismount,” you reiterated, matching his smile as he picked you up and spun you around.

“I’m so proud of you, you have no idea,” he said as his lips met yours.

#joel farabee #joel farabee x reader #joel farabee imagines #joel farabee x gymnast!reader #joel fatabee imagines #nhl imagines #nhl imagine #beezer #hockey imagine

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alirhi · 3 years

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okay. let's do this shit.

Guess what, bitches? Mama bear's back and angry all over again. Remember when I said I might dive into a ragepost about how Bucky's treated after completing the one about Loki? This is it. This is the post. Welcome to fucking Thunderdome.

I will actually try to keep it civil. No promises, but I'll try. and I will not be accepting "constructive criticism" about my rage. Just so we're clear.

Got it? Good. Let's dive in.

In case you don't want to read the whole thing (I know I get wordy) here's what this whole post will boil down to: BUCKY NEVER HAD A FUCKING CHOICE. NEVER. NOT ONCE IN HIS ENTIRE ADULT LIFE.

Now, quick reminder: I don't read comics. I know nothing about Bucky's comic canon, except what Sebastian liked to bring up as often as possible during TWS/CW promotions: at some point, Bucky boned Nat. XD Since Bucky only exists as a Marvel property, I won't be bitching about other source material being disrespected like I did with Loki. This is all MCU, my dudes. And honestly? That's enough, because though we don't see nearly enough of Bucky for my liking, we do manage to get a rich, deep backstory to him in the material we're given, partly thanks to better writing in the early days of the MCU, and partly thanks to Sebastian Stan's phenomenal acting. Unlike the writers of the Loki series, Seb knows how to show, not tell. And gods, what stories those eyes show...

Let's start with the army. In an old post illustrating what an absolute BAMF Bucky Barnes truly is, I mistakenly said he enlisted, and a kind soul educated me on the incredible attention to detail Marvel used to pay - in this case, Bucky's ID number. 32557038. As this kind, eagle-eyed soul pointed out to me, the first two digits of that number - 32 - signify that Bucky was drafted, specifically from the NY, NJ, DE area (that last part is rather obvious, as Bucky and Steve are from Brooklyn lol). Bucky didn't choose to go to war. He was drafted. He was forced to fight, or go to prison.

Bucky was born in 1917, which means - again, as someone pointed out to me a while back - he came of age during the Great Depression. As a child, he would likely have seen his parents living comfortably and able to shower each other and him and his sister with gifts and fun memories, and then POOF. Stock market crashes when he's only 12-years-old, and life becomes brutal and painful. He manages to have some fun with his best friend Steve, and spends his teens/early 20s chasing girls and keeping his stupid, stubborn, tiny friend from getting beaten to death.

Steve constantly has something to prove. He's absolutely got what my mom always called "little man's disease", and Bucky's just doing his best not to roll his eyes too much at this asthmatic chihuahua constantly trying to beat up Tibetan mastiffs. While Steve keeps lying on his enlistment forms (an actual crime) trying again and again to get into the army and prove what a badass he is (definitely not), Bucky's had enough trauma and upheaval in his life and he just wants his stupid friend to calm tf down and live. Enjoy the fact that he doesn't have to go to war and get his limbs blown off.

And then he gets fucking drafted. This sweet, resigned realist who knows exactly how dangerous the war really is, is forced to put on a uniform and go fight strangers alongside other strangers thousands of miles from everything he knows. And on his last night of freedom, when he just wants to hang out with his friend, see some cool gadgets, and dance with a pretty girl, his stupid angry chihuahua friend feels the need to lie and try to enlist again.

Okay. Gotta get back on track. Ragepost about mistreatment of Bucky, not how much Steve annoys me. Sorry. Anyway...

Bucky's drafted, accepts his shitty lot with a brave smile, and is shipped off to Europe, where he is captured by HYDRA and presumed by the Allies to be KIA. Instead, he's strapped down, tortured, and given the HYDRA version of the super serum against his will. Steve rescues him, and Bucky knows he can't leave his idiot friend to his own devices to get his head blown off, so he dives right back into the fray. And then he falls off a cliff, loses most of his left arm, and is declared dead...again. This one's pretty damn valid, though lol. Without the serum no one knew he'd been shot up with, there is no way he would have survived that fall.

Here is where Bucky's story gets truly heartbreaking: His autonomy, his ability to consent is stripped from him through electroshock torture/brainwashing. The trigger words are conditioned into him during this process, and boom. Ten words in Russian, and Bucky Barnes is gone. Even the confused, hurting shadow of him is gone, leaving only a perfectly obedient killing machine, with Bucky's pretty face. He's strong as all hell, though, so they can't keep him fully under their control for long, not without more torture, when the disorientation of being fucking frozen wears off on longer missions.

I cannot stress this point enough, guys: Bucky. Had. No. Choice. Not like the draft, where his choices (go and get shot at, refuse and go to jail, or dodge and run to Canada) just suck. No, he literally didn't have a choice. He had his ability to choose stripped from him. If that's too complex a concept to really sink in, try this: His brain was fucking raped. Repeatedly. For decades. Nothing the Winter Soldier ever did was Bucky's fault. Nothing. Ever. Not remotely, no matter how you fucking slice it. Bucky is not an assassin. I almost said "not a killer", but he was a soldier, and a sharpshooter. He definitely killed when he was himself, but that was in a war, not a series of assassinations.

So far, imo, so good. This is just a rundown of Bucky's pre-show backstory. I don't love what he had to suffer, but I do love how it was treated in the movies. People were afraid of him, but when they knew the whole situation, Steve, Nat, and Sam rallied behind him. Natasha had plenty of reason to want the Winter Soldier dead; he'd tried to kill her multiple times and almost succeeded. Sam had no reason to help Bucky at all; he didn't know him, didn't trust him, and again, TWS had tried to kill him. But he stood by Steve, and when Bucky showed the clear difference between himself and TWS, Sam stood by him, too, and fought alongside him.

And it's very realistic, imo, that Tony didn't give a single fuck that Bucky had no choice. He watched this man murder both of his parents on tape. If TWS had killed my dad and I saw proof of it, I'd try to kill Bucky, too. Grief wins out over logic. Most emotions usually do. And that's a very important point we're going to come back to in a few minutes.

Bucky was really only in like ten minutes at most of IW and Endgame, and for multiple reasons I hate those movies, so I'm just gonna skip them, kay? Kay. On to the main event!

Here's where I get pissed off. Even if I didn't have an unhealthy attachment to this character, or the depth of appreciation for his tragic backstory that I do, the lack of continuity between the movies and the show alone would still piss me off. It always does. Don't even get me started on Joss "Continuity? What continuity?" Whedon and his (iconic, but flawed) shows. Ahem. Back on track...

Let me just get one little thing out of the way real quick: I fucking LOVE The Falcon and the Winter Soldier. I love it. This show amazed me when I first watched it, and I still love it after many more viewings lol. I have only ever watched it all the way through without skipping over as much John Walker shit as possible the one time lol but I love how Sam and Bucky interact, and I fucking adore how Sam's arc was treated. I just wish they'd show the same care and attention to Bucky.

Because what they did to Bucky in this show is a fucking travesty. There was a tiny ray of hope in the pilot, when he called out Dr. Bitchface for being a terrible shrink. I thought that would be the start of him realizing he needed to find someone else and ignore the damaging shit that woman was telling him. But...nope. No such luck.

The show really had a strong start, I'll give it that. We see Bucky having nightmares of his time as TWS and struggling to hide how his traumatic memories are affecting him as he tries to live in the world again. He befriends the father of one of HYDRA's victims, which can't be good for Bucky (and we're shown it's definitely not when he sees the shrine in Yori's home to his late son) but it's sweet, how he's trying to connect and reach out to someone who's hurting and lonely.

They drop the ball a little with the whole... Bucky can hack a fucking car, but can't figure out Tinder thing. Had they just run with the fandom interpretation of the tiger photos line, that it shows that Bucky is bi and left it at that, I'd have been okay with it (and no, that is not because I ship Sam/Bucky. it's because Bucky is and always has been a certified nerd who loves technology and has consistently shown very little issue learning to use new gadgets). The outdated flip phone he handed his terrible court-mandated shrink was a burner; I liked that theory when I read it, especially since it's the only time we see him even holding a phone that old lol. This all could have fit the "Bucky is a sassy bisexual nerd" narrative and it'd be okay. Instead, the director was like "NOOOOOO that line was just to show how old he is and how he can't figure out all this newfangled technology!" Woman, you had him remotely driving someone else's vehicle with a tablet. That is NOT a man who can't figure out a damn smart phone!

But that's just a minor annoyance. What fills me with absolute rage is how everyone - not just the shitty therapist who lashes out at and purposely triggers her traumatized patients, but EVERYONE - Sam, Zemo, people who should fucking know better ALL treat him like he's a psychopath and a ticking time bomb. Like he chose to take the serum and he chose to kill for HYDRA, and he's just seen the error of his ways. *barf*

Bucky in the movies is established to be a victim, through and through. His guilt over what he was forced to do is natural, and that he sees himself as a monster makes sense... but that doesn't mean it's correct. The one and only thing I ever liked about Steve Rogers is at least he got it. He pointed out that none of it was Bucky's fault, he tried to show him that he was worth saving. That's the other reason I refuse to talk about Endgame. This post will get a WHOLE LOT LONGER and a lot fucking angrier if I open that door.

Zemo supposedly knows everything about HYDRA and super soldiers... So why does he treat Bucky like he's a corrupt serial killer? (this, for the record, is why I don't like Zemo) Why does he never point out that Bucky was given the serum against his will, or that his actions, when he had control of them, proved that he was never corrupted? Bucky never wanted to become superhuman. Bucky didn't even want to fucking fight!

Sam, despite constantly resisting the label, is shown very clearly to be Bucky's friend. By episode 3, he cares. He worries about how Bucky is getting lumped in with the other super soldiers in Zemo's speech... But he never really defends him. He says "what about Bucky?" but he doesn't point out that Bucky's a good man, he's fought so hard to help people, he does everything he can to avoid killing... And that fucking speech in episode 5. I was with him on "you gotta stop looking to other people to tell you who you are." I was like "YEAH! Tell him, Sam! Bucky, you're WORTH SAVING, boo! Your value does not hinge on someone else's opinion of you!" And then... Sam dropped the ball.

He not only continued the disturbing pattern of victim-blaming in this show, and in Marvel/Disney properties in general, but he gave really dangerously bad advice! No one in their right mind, mental health professional or no, would EVER tell a traumatized former assassin (whether he was responsible for his actions or not) to go confront his victims' families out of the blue with no warning and no one to mediate and keep things from going to shit. Yori already knew his son had been murdered because he was in the "wrong place, wrong time." How is it being "of service" to tell him you're the one who killed him?! Remember how I said Tony's reaction to learning the full truth about his parents' deaths was valid and would be an important point later? Hi! Welcome to later. THAT is the natural reaction to facing the man who murdered your loved one(s). And even if Yori didn't get angry and lash out, HOW IS IT "HELPING" HIM OR BRINGING HIM "CLOSURE" TO KNOW THAT HIS FRIEND KILLED HIS FUCKING SON?!?!?! This man befriended him, bonded with him, watched him grieve... And now he's learning this is the man who caused all his pain and heartache to begin with? That is so toxic and psycho I just... I can't even... UGH.

And then there's the equally toxic and damaging "deeply traumatized person just needed a stern talking to and a hug to be ALL BETTER AGAIN" ending. I loved seeing Bucky happy and socializing, but it was too soon, and it was unearned. And it sends a fucking awful message to people actually struggling with PTSD, and to their loved ones who don't know how to help them. Heaping more blame on them and then hugging it out is NOT helpful!

This show could have been damn near perfect with just two changes. That's all. Just two. 1) Someone, anyone, bringing up the reasons why Bucky was never a villain in his presence. Someone being in his corner and reminding him, like Steve did, that it wasn't his fault and he's not going to "snap". 2) More time devoted to Bucky's healing. Actual fucking healing, not the shit they tried to pass off as a magic fix-all. He can have his happy barbecue moment, just don't frame it as "everything's great now!" Healing isn't linear, and there will be both good days and bad. Some of the most fragile people in the world have the brightest smiles.

If we get a season 2, which this amazing show absolutely deserves, and they address this stuff, all will be forgiven in my book. Expanding on his story and his journey toward healing will help to reframe that "happily ever after" garbage as something more realistic. But as it stands now... Fuck Marvel.

#fan rant #ragepost #long post #bucky barnes #mcu #captain america #the first avenger #the winter soldier #civil war #tfatws #mcu spoilers #stop victim blaming #victim not villain #never a fucking villain #bucky deserved better #fuck marvel #fuck disney

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straykidsreactions · 4 years

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Reaction To: Finding Out Another Member Likes Their Crush

S T R A Y K I D S R E A C T I O N T O : Finding out that another member also likes you, their crush.

Genre: a lil angst + a lil fluff

A/N: If you’re interested, I’m willing to do a much fluffier part 2 to this. Just let me know~

Chan:

On one hand, Chan is a straightforward and competitive guy- he’s incredibly driven and he doesn’t like losing, especially when it comes to matters close to his heart. On the other hand, he’s also incredibly selfless. When he overheard Hyunjin talking to one of the guys about how adorable he found you, showing off a picture the two of you had taken together, Chan couldn’t help the way his heart sank. Of course he liked you, he’d liked you for a while and he thought he’d made it obvious to the other members by the way he always invited you to hang out with him (especially when he was buried in his laptop working until all hours of the night at his studio). But he wasn’t one to admit his feelings our right, so he couldn’t be mad at the younger member for catching feelings.

Chan would ultimately be torn between being up front with you and admitting his feelings (which could ultimately hurt his friend) or staying quiet and potentially losing you. He’d become quieter and more tense when you were around, mostly because he didn’t want to step out of line and do something that could jeopardize either relationship. It’d be especially difficult for him because he also considered you to be one of his closest friends, and the fact that he couldn’t talk to you about the dilemma he was dealing with would weigh on him. It got to a point where you’d noticed his change in behavior, so you’d asked him if you could come by his studio to talk. Truthfully he’d considered telling you no, not because he didn’t want to see you but because he didn’t fully trust himself to not do something selfish. He’d never want to hurt Hyunjin but he feared his feelings for you were too strong and that, if given the opportunity, he might act on them.

When you arrived at his studio, taking a seat beside him as he worked diligently on a few new tracks, it wasn’t hard to tell that something was off. His usual goofy and relaxed demeanor would be gone, and was replaced with a thoughtful and reserved version of the man you’d come to call your best friend.

*clearing your throat as you looked up at him intently, getting up the courage to break the ice*

“Chan, what’s going on...”

*not meeting your gaze as he continued to work on his computer, not bothering to remove an earbud as he replied*

“I’m fine Y/N I’m just busy that’s all.”

*sighing as you fiddled absentmindedly with your fingers*

“Did I do something wrong?”

*frowning as he paused momentarily, turning towards you slightly without quiet meeting your gaze*

“Why would you ask that?”

*sighing in aggravation as you reached out and grabbed his wrist, pulling him towards you slightly and forcing him to meet your eyes*

“Because you won’t even look at me and I don’t know why! You’re acting like we’re not friends anymore or something and- and that really hurts, Chan...”

*sighing as his face softened, pulling his hand away and using it to remove an earbud so he could hear you more clearly*

“I’m not I just- I don’t know what to do. I-”

*shrugging his shoulders and forcing out a small, saddened smile*

“I don’t know. I think I have to accept that sometimes I can’t win, y’know? Sometimes the timing just isn’t right...that’s all I can say, really.”

Minho:

He isn’t one to play games, or beat around the bush. That being said, he also isn’t one to take situations lightly especially when it comes to matters of his heart. He hadn’t confessed to you because, despite being sure of his feelings for quite some time, he was waiting to see if you liked him back. He didn’t want to risk your friendship if you didn’t feel the same way, so he’d been willing to play the long game- that is until he realized Felix also had feelings for you. He hadn’t out-rightly said that he was attracted to you, but Minho was quick to notice the younger’s adoring stare as you played games with him and a few of the other guys one evening at the dorm. In a way he understood it, you were particularly good friends with Felix and truthfully you were better friends with him thatn you were with Minho- but friendship didn’t necessarily mean that you had romantic feelings for him.

After you’d left and Felix was alone in the living room, Minho wouldn’t hesitate to approach him about it- but not in an obvious or aggressive way. He had no intention of forcing Felix’s hand, or trying to come to an agreement on who should pursue you- Minho is all about the long game. It truthfully didn’t bother him that much to learn that Felix was interested in you, because you were free to choose whoever you liked. If you wanted to be with Felix, there was nothing Minho could do to change your mind. he’d be eerily calm about the situation, not because he didn’t want you as his, but because he’d rather play smart than hard.

*approaching the younger member who was sat comfortably on the couch, clearing his throat slightly before he spoke*

“You should tell (her/him).”

*giving the older man a confused stare as he looked up from his phone*

“What?”

*not moving from his position leaning up against the doorway*

“You should tell Y/N you like (her/him). You do, don’t you?”

*his eyes widening and his cheeks growing flushed as his embarrassment became apparent*

“Hyung I, how did you know that?”

*shrugging his shoulders slightly as he pressed his tongue to the inside of his cheek, nodding thoughtfully*

“It isn’t hard to tell...”

*frowning slightly as he thought carefully on the older member’s words*

“Do you think (she/he) likes me back?”

“You can’t know until you ask...just be upfront.”

*in thought for a moment, scratching nervously at the back of his neck as he inhaled sharply*

“I-I don’t know, Hyung...Y/N and I are really good friends, yknow. I don’t know if I wanna mess that up.”

*his usual intimidating demeanor softening slightly as he adjusted his stance against the doorway, running his hand through his hair as he thought for a moment*

“Fine then, tell (her/him) when you’re ready. (She/He) might be gone by then, though. Are you gonna be ok with that, if she’s with someone else?”

His question was weighted, though Felix had no idea to what extent. Minho had no intention of undermining your relationship with the younger member, though he doubted he even could considering your close friendship. Moreso, he wanted to be clear with Felix of his options, without 100% admitting to his own feelings. He didn’t think it was important to be vulnerable and admit that he also had a crush on you- since it was very possible you didn’t feel the same way towards him. As long as Felix was aware that there might be others out there vying for your affection, it wasn’t relevant for him to know that his own band mate was one of those people.

“H-hyung what are you saying?”

*shifting apprehensively as he stared at Felix with a serious expression on his face*

“I’m saying if you want a shot, take it. If you don’t...someone else will.”

Changbin:

He’d be lying if he said it didn’t hurt a bit when he’d overheard Chan inviting you to his studio to hang out with him while he worked. He knew the oldest member well enough to catch on to the fact that he probably had feelings for you- and while it wasn’t ideal, it wouldn’t discourage him. He didn’t mind a little healthy competition and, even though it sucked that it had to be between such a close friend, Changbin isn’t one to easily give up just to avoid confrontation. He didn’t have any intention of asking Chan to step down, ultimately the decision was up to you and that was fine with Changbin. Though he had been a bit more hesitant to admit his feelings before- the sudden sense that he might lose you gave him a new-found confidence that he’d be sure to show off to you.

His strategy was to just be straightforward and honest, if you didn’t feel the same way he couldn’t help that- but he at least wanted to try. When you came over that evening to cook dinner with all the members and enjoy the evening together- he’d be sure to pull you aside, not caring who saw.

“Is everything ok, Binnie? What’d you wanna talk about?”

*nodding reassuringly, his hold on your wrist never letting go as he closed the door behind him*

“I just wanted to see you, Y/N, is that a crime?”

*laughing playfully as you shoved his shoulder lightly, rolling your eyes*

“You saw me when we were out in the kitchen, what’d we have to go into your room for?”

*giving you a confident smile as his gaze traced every inch of your face, the pad of his thumb running across your hand that he was still holding*

“It was too loud out there, here it’s just us.”

*feeling heat rise in your cheeks as you gave him a quizzical look*

“What do you wanna say that can’t be said around the other guys?”

*chuckling slightly as he took a small step closer to you, shrugging his shoulders*

“Hmm, I don’t know. Maybe I just wanted to tell you that...you look really good tonight. Every night, actually...”

*your eyes widening as you became even more flushed than before, unaware of Changbin’s finger that was placed gently on the inside of your wrist- easily feeling the way your pulse quickened at his bold words*

“I-I...what?”

*raising his eyebrow flirtatiously as he continued on with his matter-of-fact tone of voice*

“I just think you deserve to be told when you good, Y/N...I know a lot of guys would probably like to be yours, I’m sure you have options. And I don’t have any expectations from you- you don’t have to say anything. We can go back into the kitchen and pretend none of this ever happened...”

*his eyes darkening as he watched the way you trembled slightly under his gaze, entranced in his words and his gentle but firm voice*

“I just want you know that...just because I’m your friend, doesn’t mean I’m not a man. Maybe it’s time you start seeing me as one.”

Hyunjin:

Despite his confident stage persona, at heart Hyunjin is pretty shy and reserved- especially when it comes to his emotions. He’d had a crush on you for a while, but couldn’t ever bring himself to confess his feelings for you outright. He tried to make it obvious in other ways, one of his favorite things to do would be making playlists for you. He’d put so much thought into each song, insisting that it was just good music that you should check out, but the messages in the lyrics would all be subtly laced with his feelings. Unlike his subtle methods of making his feelings known, however, Jisung was much more direct and upfront. So when Hyunjin overheard Jisung talking to you on the balcony about his feelings for you- Hyunjin’s heart would absolutely sink. Jisung was one of his closest friends, despite how different they could be at times. Hyunjin hadn’t stuck around to listen to your reply or the rest of the conversation, he couldn’t be sure of your feelings but the fact that his band mate also had feelings for you (and was certain enough to act on them) would be enough to convince him that he shouldn’t intervene. Of course he wanted to be with you, and if you did end up accepting Jisung he was pretty sure it’d crush him, but he wouldn’t be willing to jeopardize his friendship with either of you. He’d still spend time with you and force a few smiles to keep you from worrying about him, but after a long night of overthinking and beating himself up for not admitting his feelings to you sooner he’d delete the playlists he’d made for you- which was the tipping point where you realized something was wrong.

You’d approached him after a photo shoot when you’d stopped by to bring the members lunch, and it wouldn’t be hard to tell that he wasn’t his usual comfortable self around you.

*talking softly so as not to be heard by the rest of the guys*

“Hyunjinnie...is everything ok? Y-you’ve been acting different recently...”

*averting his gaze as he shook his head, forcing a small smile*

“I’m not acting differently, Y/N, I’m not sure what you mean.”

*frowning as you inched yourself closer to him, looking at him quizzically as he continued to avoid your gaze*

“Yes you have been...you won’t even look at me now and you deleted the playlists-”

“They were just playlist, Y/N.”

His interjection was harsher than you’d anticipated, and it stung as the words left his lips. He’d never intended on pushing you away, he wanted nothing more than for you to be in his life- but he couldn’t help but imagine what it would be like to watch you fall for one of his closest friends and the thought alone was too much for him. He’d rather keep you at arm’s length, not wanting to intervene or create a confrontation.

“W-what?”

*his eyes darting around the room, focusing on anything except your face as he tried to keep his spirits up*

“They were just songs, it’s not a big deal...”

*and then, despite every ounce of his body warning him against saying something jealous and biting, he continued*

“You have someone else who can make you playlists from now on, right?”

Jisung:

On the outside Jisung comes across as a very bubbly, “heart-on-his-sleeve” kind of guy- but underneath that outward persona is a much softer and more sensitive side of him. He’d liked you for a while but he’d never said anything because, truthfully, he was worried about how it might damage your friendship with all the members. You were all so close and, though there were moments where he’d almost swear you seemed to like him back, he was worried that if he acted on his feelings he’d risk ruining the near perfect dynamic you all had. It wasn’t that he’d never considered it, of course his heart ached a little every time you smiled at one of the other guys or fell asleep on their shoulder- he’d tell himself if only you were his...you could fall asleep in his arms instead. But Jisung isn’t the kind of guy to rush into a relationship, especially not with someone he considers a close friend. He’d over-analyzed and been too in-his-head a thousand times, until one very late night at the studio.

He’d gone into the studio to record some vocals with Jeongin and Seungmin, finding moments of downtime in between his parts to rest and play on his phone. Seungmind had been recording for a while at this point, as as the clock struck well-past midnight Jisung could feel himself growing tired. The younger member beside him was also visibly tired, but as he leaned over towards the older member his eyes caught a glimpse Jisung’s phone- the homescreen of which was a selfie the two of you had taken together on a trip to the beach. It could’ve just been a nice photo between two friends- but of course it was much more than that to Jisung. Maybe if Jeongin had been a little more awake he would’ve picked up on the nervous glance the older member gave him as he pulled his phone away- but instead he said something that took Jisung by even more shock.

*leaning his head on the back of the sofa behind him as he stared up at the ceiling, his voice barely above a shy whisper*

“Hyung...do you think Y/N is seeing anyone?”

*his eyes widening as he turned to face Jeongin, giving him a confused look*

“W-why do you ask?”

*his gaze suddenly shifting to face the floor as he fiddled with his fingers apprehensively*

“I just...I know we’re good friends, but that doesn’t mean (she/he) doesn’t have other friends...maybe even a boyfriend...”

*scoffing as he turned back to his phone, trying to play off the fact that for a moment he thought the youngest member had caught him*

“Yah, why do you care about that kind of thing, hmm?”

*without skipping a beat as he turned to face Jisung with a serious expression plastered across his face*

“Because...I like (her/him).”

The instant those words echoed out across the small room, Jisung’s heart would plummet. He’d liked you for so long and now one of his closest friends- someone he considered to be his brother- had just admitted he felt the same. Despite his usual forth-coming and straightforward attitude, Jisung would stay entirely silent. If Jeongin hadn’t been so sleep-deprived, it would have been easy to read the distraught and pained look on Jisung’s face as he sat frozen in his chair. He sat there in thought for a while, falling silent for so long Jeongin almost mistook him for asleep.

“Hyung?”

*glancing over towards him without facing towards him, worried his face would give away to many of his real emotions*

“Mm?”

“Aren’t you going to say anything?”

Again, there was silence. On one hand, Jisung’s heart was unequivocally yours and it had been for quite sometime, but on the other hand he would never and could never intentionally hurt one of his members. He couldn’t muster ethusiastic or encouraging words, he could barely muster any words at all, but he managed to keep himself from saying anything that he knew deep down he could no longer admit. Jeongin had had the courage to admit his feelings, and he hadn’t. Maybe you deserved someone like Jeongin- someone who wouldn’t overthink every little move...someone willing to be bold even if it felt selfish.

“Oh...does Y/N know?”

*shaking his head as he adjusted his position on the couch, now fully laying down as he prepared to take a nap*

“No...I don’t know if I should tell (her/him). I want to...but I don’t know, maybe that isn’t the right thing to do...what do you think, hyung?”

Before Jisung had the chance to fall into a silent stupor of his own thoughts, he felt his phone vibrate in his hand. He glanced down, only to see your name flash across the screen. If signs from the universe existed, Jisung decided that must have been one. Without a second thought, Jisung said the words that had desperately been building at the base of his throat from the moment Jeongin admitted his feelings for you. It was selfish and Jisung knew it, but in that moment knowing that it was the wrong thing to say wasn’t enough to stop him from saying it.

“Don’t. Don’t tell (her/him).”

Felix:

Unlike some of the other member’s who kept their feelings very much to themselves, Felix would be pretty obvious about his feelings towards you- and it would be especially obvious to the other members. He hadn’t confessed to you outright and in all honesty you hadn’t seemed to be picking up on his subtle flirtatious hints, but the guys were quick to spot it and teased him a bit when you weren’t around. While they often encouraged Felix to be upfront about his feelings he hadn’t built up the nerve to do so. Of course he wanted to be with you, but he didn’t want to make you uncomfortable by mistaking harmless friendship for something more. He wasn’t quite ready to put his heart on the line-- at least so he thought.

One particular evening he’d invited you over to the dorm to cook with him, an activity the two of you often did together as a fun way to de-stress and just have a nice time. Sometimes the other guys would join you and other times it was just the two of you, but on this particular occasion it was just you and Felix-- and Changbin.

Of course Felix never minded when the other guys hung out with the two of you, though recently they’d intentionally been giving the two of you alone time in the kitchen in hopes that Felix might confess. It seemed a little odd that Changbin had parked himself in the living room, working on his computer with his headphones in just as you and Felix entered the front door. The guys usually tried to make themselves scarce if they knew you were coming over as a subtle way of encouraging Felix to open up to you- but tonight Changbin seemed to have missed the memo. Of course the instant you saw him you’d invited him into the kitchen to cook with you and, though he seemed very reluctant, he’d begrudgingly agreed. Felix wouldn’t say anything, truthfully he always had fun with you and Binnie-- though he doubted he’d be able to open up about his true feelings with one of his closest friends around. Felix is a pretty observant person, especially when it comes to people he’s close with, and he can always tell when something’s amiss, so it didn’t take him long to notice that Changbin didn’t seem particularly interested in your late night baking. He would smile and agreeably measure out the flour like you’d asked him too, but it wasn’t hard to tell that the instant you stopped looking at him his expression would shift and the mood drained from his face. After a while in the kitchen, you excused yourself to use the restroom, and as a silence fell over the room Felix was quick to bring it up, worrying that something might be weighing on his friend’s mind.

“Hyung, are you ok? You seem kinda out of it.”

*shaking his head as he adjusted the baseball cap on his head, forcing a weak smile*

“Yeah, yeah I’m good...actually I should head out- I gotta go to the studio and work on some stuff but, uhh...tell Y/N bye for me, ok?”

*giving him a concerned face as he stopped the elder man, grabbing his arm lightly as he started towards the door*

“Hey, hey man I can tell something’s up, ok? For real, tell me-- you’re scaring me now, hyung. Are you in trouble or something?”

*shaking his head as he pulled his arm away from Felix’s grasp*

“I’m fine, I promise...I just shouldn’t be here right now.”

“Wh-what, why? I thought we were having a fun time? Look if you think it’s because I was gonna talk to Y/N tonight about, y’know, how I felt or something, it’s ok! I’d rather we all have a nice time together, I can talk to (her/him) some other time.”

*inhaling sharply as he pulled off his cap to run his hands through his hair apprehensively, shaking his head as his gaze met Felix’s momentarily*

“It’s not that I just...I don’t think it’s good for me to be here, I’m just gonna head to the studio ok?”

*growing concern evident in his voice as he stopped the older man once again, worried that maybe he’d offended him or said something wrong in some way*

“Hyung seriously just tell me what’s going on?”

*snapping as he turned towards the younger member quickly, his voice sharp but still soft enough to not be heard outside the small kitchen*

“I like (her/him), ok! Is that what you wanted to hear, man? I can’t be here right now because I know how you feel about Y/N and it’s fucked up for me to even feel the way I do-- but I can’t help it and if I stay here I’m gonna do something I’ll regret, ok?!”

Felix’s face immediately fell, his eyes growing slightly wider as his once playful and teasing smile faded from his expression, leaving him looking perplexed and hurt. Changbin was one of his best friends and he’d just admitted to having feelings for you-- despite knowing that Felix had every intention of asking you to be his. He’d feel confused, hurt, and honestly a little bit betrayed-- but more than anything he’d be conflicted.

“W-why did you tell me that, hyung...I- what am I supposed to do with that?”

His voice was soft, barely above a whisper as Changbin stared at the floor, clearly feeling ashamed for letting his feelings slip so carelessly.

“I shouldn’t have said anything, Lix...I’m sorry.”

“Are you gonna love (her/him)?” The question echoed throughout the hollow room that suddenly felt ten times colder and Felix’s tone deepened as his frustrations started to slip through the cracks.

“Are you going to take responsibility for your feelings? Are you gonna show up for (her/him) no matter what-- do you really think you’re what’s best for Y/N, I mean, be honest with me!” He wasn’t yelling, his voice wasn’t carrying nearly enough impact to be heard by others outside the conversation, but he might as well have been. The bite in his tone was harsher than he’d anticipated, and by the slightly shocked look on Changbin’s face it was obvious he hadn’t expected the level of hurt Felix was clearly feeling.

“Felix, look bro I-I wasn’t planning for this to happen, ok, I never wanted to be in this situation...”

“But we are in this situation, now, Bin...whether we like it or not.” His voice was softer now, more dejected as he stared at his closest friend, void of expression. Felix was never to fight unnecessarily, especially not with his members who he considered to be like his brothers. That being said, he had no problem being upfront about what was upsetting him if he felt it was necessary-- not holding back as he addressed the difficult situation head on. Despite his stern words, the hurt would be evident on his face as he tried to figure out what he was supposed to do in this situation-- something he never expected to be faced with. Changbin was silent for a moment, listening to the faucet turn on from the other room as the two men realized you’d be back momentarily.

“I’m not gonna act on it...if that’s what you’re asking.”

*quiet for a moment as he heard your footsteps echoing against the hardwood floors, turning toward his friend with a serious expression*

“Should we pretend this never happened, then? Because we can...I’m giving you a chance to take it back, and I’ll forget you ever said what you said.”

The two paused for a moment as you rounded the corner, tapping absentmindedly on your phone without realizing the severity of the conversation happening in just the other room.

“Tell Y/N or don’t, hyung-- I can’t tell you to do...but I’m not giving up. I don’t wanna fight you for (her/him)...but I will if I have to.”

Seungmin:

There aren’t going to be a lot of words exchanged when it comes to Seungmin finding out that Minho had a crush on you. In all honesty, there weren’t a lot of words exchanged between the two of you even before Seungmin found out about Minho’s feelings-- something about you made him ridiculously shy and though he did his best to talk with you and hold conversations he always found himself blushing and stumbling over his words. Minho isn’t one to admit his feelings outright, especially not to the other guys, but Seungmin is incredibly intuitive and it didn’t take long for him to realize the older member saw you as much more than a friend. Part of it filled him with anger and frustration, but more than anyone else Seungmin would feel those things towards himself. He’d be hard on himself for not having the courage to talk to you more, watching with an ache in his chest and Minho effortlessly had conversations with you, made you laugh, and even taught you a few dance moves after practice. It was like it was effortless between the two of you, and though a part of Seungmin knew you’d have been just as friendly towards him had he extended he couldn’t work up the nerve to say something.

It may have taken him a while to be honest with you about his feelings, but this push was exactly what he needed. He wouldn’t expect anything from you- he fully anticipated that you’d reject him, after all, he didn’t talk with you much and was more often than not caught admiring you quietly. But one late night on set for their latest photo shoot, you’d stopped by to support them and bring them food- and he’d take that moment as an opportunity to finally open up to you. He knew there was a possibility that what he was doing was really idiotic, after all, Minho might confess to you and if the two of you started dating it’d be more than a little awkward around the younger member. But even though Seungmin realized all of that, he had feelings weighing on his heart that he couldn’t keep bundled up any longer.

When you arrived at the studio where they were shooting with bags of take out from the boy’s favorite restaurant in hand, Minho was quick to help you unload everything. Seungmin watched for a moment, wondering if he’d once again lost his opportunity. But as you started walking around the set and bringing each of the member’s their food, he felt his heart skip a beat and he knew he’d have another opportunity to say something, despite the fact that his hands were shaking.

*walking up to him and smiling shyly as you handed him his take out order, looking around awkward as he appeared to have a cold expression on his face*

‘Uhm..I hope they got everything right on your order...if they didn’t you can tell me and I’ll go back and have them fix it.”

*letting a genuine smile seep through his nervous exterior as he thanked you, taking the bag from your hands*

“I-I’m sure it’s fine...thank you.”

*nodding softly as you went to walk away, feeling a lull in the conversation to be his way of asking you to leave”

Just as you took a step away from him to leave, he’d reach out and grab your wrist, his eyes just as wide as yours at his own bold action. You turned towards him, glancing between his face and his hand that was wrapped snugly around your wrist as he gently pulled you back to him.

“I-I was hoping I could say something to you, Y/N...if that’s ok.”

*giving him a slightly confused but understanding expression as you nodded*

“Uhh..sure, Seungmin...is everything ok?”

*nodding as he let go of your wrist, holding his hands close to him to hopefully hide the fact that they were still shaking slightly from the nerves*

“I...I know I don’t talk to you enough. I know you probably think I’m cold towards you, or that I don’t like you- but it isn’t true. Any of it...I-I do want to talk to you. I want to be your friend but...”

*looking away as he glanced over towards Minho on the other side of the studio and feeling his nerves spike*

“I don’t expect you to take responsibility for this, Y/N...and I don’t want to make you feel uncomfortable...but I w-want to be more than your friend.”

*taking a deep breath and running a hand through his hair apprehensively as he studied your face for any signs of emotion at all, but you still looked to be mostly in shock*

“I-I’m sorry I...I don’t want you to think you owe me anything, you really don’t. If you want to date someone else, I understand. I just wanted to tell you, if I’m quiet or act cold towards you...I hope you’ll understand why.”

Jeongin:

Jeongin is the kind of person who’s quick to show his emotions when he’s happy and sharing in other’s excitemen, but when it comes to his own hardships and sadness he quickly becomes closed off. Despite being the youngest in the group, Jeongin's mentality is oriented towards not burdening others with his problems-- and he especially doesn’t want to feel as though his members take pity on him. Maybe that’s why he’d never admitted to the others that he had a crush on you-- because a part of him could tell from the beginning that he wasn’t the only one to have those feelings.

Though Jeongin can be playfully confrontational and doesn’t mind calling his friends out over small things, when it comes to actual conflict Jeongin is more soft-hearted and isn’t one to address things immediately. So when he noticed Seungmin’s cheeks tinge red every time you sat beside him, or every time you paid him a compliment, Jeongin wouldn’t have the nerve to bring it up right away. He knew Seungmin was equally soft-hearted and the two as a pair wouldn’t have much need for direct confrontation, but his lack of confrontation shouldn’t be mistaken for giving in-- because there’s no way in hell Jeongin would give up on you just because his friend liked you too.

When he’d invited you over to the JYP office where he was working on some lyrics late in the evening, his intentions had been completely harmless. The two of you often worked together on things like that, he’d tease you by saying that you were his good luck charm but you had no idea how true that really was. He always wrote more freely and from the heart when you were around, something about your presence always seemed to coax out the romantic side of him-- which proved very beneficial when it came to writing love songs.

*checking your phone as Jeongin worked silently beside you, finding a peaceful quietude between the two of you until you came across a text message that made you laugh*

“Oh my god, Innie look what Seungmin just sent me-”

*holding the phone up for Jeongin to see, his face morphing into a tense frown as he looked over at your phone and the funny video that was playing*

“Y/N I’m busy...just send things like that to me and I’ll watch them later, ok?”

*frowning slightly as you nodded, apologizing for interrupting his work flow*

“...only send them if they’re actually funny though.”

He knew he he shouldn’t have muttered the last part under his breath, you wer close enough to hear him and when he glanced over at your confused expression he knew he was on the verge of saying something he might regret.

“What do you mean? You didn’t think it was funny?” You laughed softly as you pulled the video clip back up, giggling as you rewatched it.

“I dunno, I thought it was funny...Seungminnie always sends the funniest things.”

Maybe he would’ve let it slide if you hadn’t said that, if you hadn’t giggled the way you did, if you hadn’t called Seungmin by his pet name-- but you had. He could feel tension boiling in the pit of his stomach, a mix of jealousy and angst at the fact that he couldn’t admit on the spot that your giggle made his heart skip a beat.

“Well if you think he’s that funny maybe you should help him write lyrics late at night instead...”

“Jeongin what does that have to do with-”

“Forget it...forget I said anything...” He interjected, fully aware of how disjointed his logic had become as he tried to maintain the frustration building in the pit of his stomach. You slid your chair slightly closer to him, your expression softening as you realized something was bothering him beyond the silly video.

*pulling on his sleeve gently and looking at him with worried eyes*

“Innie...what’s going on?”

*inhaling sharply at your sudden touch, continuing to stare at his screen for fear of crumbling completely if he were to meet your gaze and muttering quietly under his breath, unsure of whether you could hear him or not*

“Sometimes I wonder what it’d be like if you were just mine, y’know...”

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eatyourchancletas · 4 years

Text

SUMMARY | y/n l/n; the trauma surgeon who was in the wrong place at the wrong time and is taken hostage by the terrifying mafia known as ateez. despite their situations, love arises between the doctor and san; but when an enemy comes in between the group, breaking trust and belief between the members, what will san choose to save; his newfound love or his brothers?

PAIRING | choi san x male reader

INFO/CATEGORY | mafia au, angst

WARNINGS | violence, weapon usage/mention, adult language

[chapter index] [playlist] [previous chapter]

AUTHOR’S NOTE | chapter 2 is finally up! it was written by monnie, a sweetheart 😙 edited by alex! we hope you enjoy! please leave feedback, we really encourage it and enjoy it!

WORD COUNT | 1.7k

TAG LIST :; @jonghoshoe if you’d like to be added to the list, please say so in out inbox/ask box!

at this point y/n wondered why he followed his instincts. had he known it was a mafia on the other side of where he was, he could have gotten in his car, gone home to enjoy a cup of ramen, and then go to sleep. then again he didn’t know, so he blamed life’s cruelty.

“hey, good morning.” a soft voice brought him out of his thoughts. he glanced over at the familiar voice that belonged to the only person he’s seen in the past few days.

y/n said nothing, watching the other slide in a tray of steamy fresh food. “i noticed you eat a few things more than the others so i tried to give you bigger portions.”

“thanks,” y/n accepted the tray with no expression and seonghwa pursed his lips at the short answer.

at the tense atmosphere, seonghwa excused himself. he wasn't sure if he felt pity for y/n, but either way, he just wanted y/n to grow used to this new environment because one thing was certain and that was that y/n could never go back to his old life.

seonghwa sighed softly, "good morning."

y/n tilted his head at him, looking up at the second in command with dull eyes. he simply hummed in greeting, clearly not in the mood during the past five days.

the blonde gripped the tray, his patience running low with the older’s behavior. he's meaning well, he understands y/n, he does, but no one will get anywhere if there’s constant passiveness between the two.

“i threw in an extra cookie,” he gestured to the pastry, “i figured you’d like some extra sugar in your system.”

once more, y/n hummed, nodding his head lightly. it made seonghwa's blood boil—clearly, y/n wasn't vibing with him, and the last thing he thought of in this situation was the way y/n was being affected.

"hey, listen. your little silent treatment isn't gonna do jack here. you either socialize or stay down here, which isn't gonna happen because sooner or later they'll drag you up there. keep in mind you won't have anyone else to socialize with—forget your friends, family, everyone you had around before this. you'll be around us for as long as needed, maybe until your last breath."

y/n scoffed, looking away from seonghwa, something the older didn't take very nicely until he heard y/n’s meek reply, "you say that like it's easy."

the younger sputtered, handing y/n the tray of food, "i know it's hard, but just know each of us gave something up too. but, eventually, we all learned how to live with it,” seonghwa squatted to y/n’s level, “and you will too."

the doctor swallowed, taking the tray and finally making eye contact with seonghwa. they shared a small pained smile, and seonghwa made one last comment before heading back, "make sure you eat up—don't want you dying on me after i took all that time to make such delicacies."

y/n smiled to himself as he heard seonghwa shuffle to turn around. "thank you…i'll see you later…"

"sure will…” seonghwa’s chuckle ricocheted off the walls as he walked down the hall to the metal door. he pushed it open, making his way up the stairs and to the living room where a few of the others were gathered.

“hyung! just on time, we were talking about this upcoming mission we might have in a few days,” san commented as soon as he saw the older.

“is that so?” seonghwa mumbled in response as he sat down next to hongjoong, the other sipping iced bourbon from a glass cup.

“i’m not sure about it yet,” hongjoong set the glass down on the coffee table in front of him, “wooyoung still needs to gather more info before i verify anything. can’t be careless, remember?”

“totally, hyung. i’ll dig more into the client and have the info needed before morning.” wooyoung gave a reassuring smile to their boss, who simply hummed in return.

“by the way hwa,” hongjoong glanced at his boyfriend, leaning back into the leather couch and crossing his legs, “how’s the doctor?”

seonghwa blinked, “he’s fine, a bit down but he’ll get over it. so, in short, he’s behaved well these past days.”

hongjoong nodded, “that’s good, we’ll let him out tomorrow then. but right now i need you to go with san to the mechanic shop, make sure business is flowing well—which i don’t doubt. maybe visit mingi and yunho and see how well the loaning business has been. if i recall correctly, mingi said something about a few people not paying back on time; tell them not to get aggressive, we aren’t monsters after all.” there was a playful lilt to his tone, but they picked up on the seriousness behind it.

san got up, nodding at hongjoong’s orders, “we’ll tell yeo if anything happens.”

seonghwa followed suit, “we’ll see you later then,” he waved farewell without looking back at them.

wooyoung slid the folder over to hongjoong, the older raising a brow while taking it in his hands. “i gathered some info, it’s all in there—but to put it simply, i think we’ll gain lots of benefits after signing a deal with him. his name is yoo dongwoo, lives in seongnam.”

“that’s a bit too close to us, don’t you think?” hongjoong hums as he sets the folder down, resting his elbow on the armrest and his chin on the palm of his hand.

“yeah, it is. but i think it’d be worth it. he seems to have lots of connections, and so far he’s never had an issue with payments, transportation and business—” wooyoung’s attention is taken when the door leading to the basement is pushed open.

“people!” yunho blocks y/n, capturing the attention of the others in the room. the tallest holds his arms out in a way of grand gesture, bowing, “i present you, y/n-”

“that’s...not necessary…” y/n can feel his skin grow warm under the tense and awkward atmosphere. luckily it’s broken by the one and only choi san.

“well we haven’t properly introduced ourselves if you think about it,” he pushed himself into y/n’s space, the doctor tensing up a bit at the close intrusion. yunho watched san, stepping aside to give the two some more space,“i’m san! nice to meet you! i’m sure we’ll get along just fine.”

the cheerful boy grinned widely, dimples making an appearance while his eyes did the opposite. y/n blinked, processing how close san was before taking a small step back. he didn’t reply verbally, giving a small smile and a nod instead,

“you know me already,” yunho said while taking a seat at the table.

"you know me too," seonghwa walked in with a tray of cookies, baking gloves protecting his hands. "and take a seat."

y/n glanced at the table, not sure where to take a seat, but he guessed it didn't matter as long as he didn't sit near the boss.

"i'm hongjoong, the boss in case you didn't know," hongjoong watched the tray seonghwa placed on the table, waiting to grab a pastry.

"i'm mingi!" said male smiled as y/n hastily took the seat next to him.

"i'm wooyoung, but call me woo if you want!" wooyoung was on the other side of y/n, making the doctor sandwiched between him and mingi.

"yeosang," the said male sat across from y/n, an intensely bored expression taking over his features.

"did we miss anyone?" seonghwa rose a brow while taking off the gloves.

"oh right, jongho! he's our bodyguard," san gestured at the buff male that stood by the door.

y/n turned to look at him, jongho gently nodding his head at him and y/n doing the same.

hongjoong clapped his hands, capturing everyone's attention. "great, now with that out of the way, let's get down to business."

everyone nodded at his words, taking a cookie from the tray seonghwa placed on the table. y/n accepted the one san handed to him, smiling a bit at how caring the male had shown to be so far.

"we're heading out in the morning, i need everyone to get back to their usual jobs by evening so we'll try to make the exchange as quick as possible. everyone except y/n and yeosang will go, we need info and updates from the outside.

before we leave i need yunho and mingi to make sure all the parts we'll hand over are correct. i don't want mistakes. wooyoung and i will take care of the talking, san and seonghwa will stand by the nearest exit to make sure everything is in order. jongho you'll be with me and woo."

all nine of them nodded at hongjoong's orders. y/n voluntarily nodded, remembering seonghwa’s earlier words, “each of us gave something up too. but, eventually, we all learned how to live with it.” he knew he wasn’t going anywhere anytime soon, so he figured he’d make it a bit easier for himself.

"and i need you all to wear bulletproof vests under your clothes just in case. your guns must be locked and loaded, got it?"

"guns?" y/n blinked, capturing everyone's attention, "why are you guys willing to blow your organs out?"

wooyoung smiled, his head tilting a bit, "why are you willing to work for people who’s organs have been blown out?”

y/n opened his mouth before closing it and nodding in defeat, "fair point. i get paid for it, at least..."

they were all quiet before chuckling, the atmosphere feeling more warm and calm than what it was when they first gathered.

"has anyone seen y/n?"��

his peers shook their head, speaking of the last time they saw said male. the doctor he worked with mentioned something that made the nurse worry even more.

"last thing i knew was that his car was towed since he never picked it up. didn't hear anything else though, but don't worry heeseung, maybe he picked it up afterwards."

heeseung, the nurse that had asked about y/n's whereabouts, sighed. "right...i hope so...see you guys tomorrow!"

his peers returned the smile and farewell.

as heeseung took a seat on the bus, he pulled out his phone. the first thing he did was go to the messaging app and open his and y/n's chat.

'hi :]

how are you?

#t.k chapter #tinted kisses #ateez #choi san #ateez x male reader #mafia ateez #ateez mafia au #kpop x male reader #top male reader #male reader #kpop imagines #kpop fics #kpop reactions #ateez x atiny #male atiny

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