#stop being obsessed with reacting to everything lighting speed guys. and take a second to inform yourself of things

[6-30am]

Since I mentioned 2021 in my other George post, I wanted to talk about this too. This is an old tweet and the twitter advanced search function is hidden in the depths of hell (I had to search for it on google to find it), so I thought I should put this on my blog for future reference. This is George's reaction to the Abu Dhabi GP 2021 where Max won his first WDC title in a very controversial fashion. I've seen the first tweet numerous times, in a lot of different contexts. But no matter the context, be it slander or a joke or a rpf thing, it's always used to position George against Max and to prove that he has changed his views on him recently.

But look at the second tweet, posted 4 minutes after the first one. This is in the heat of the moment, George who's just gotten the chance to drive for Mercedes the following year, being vocal about an injustice that has happened to what would be his team and his teammate. He is, of course, biased, and angry. But through all this, he makes the point that Max is a great driver, that he still respects him as a competitor. He has had an incredible season. Mad, but he's still taking the time to be fair and give praise where praise it's due.

Source: https://x.com/GeorgeRussell63/status/1470039410490191879 and https://x.com/GeorgeRussell63/status/1470040401323175950

I hate how much people are trying to paint him as this emotional cry baby who has no idea what he's talking about. Yes, he is emotional, but most humans are and in a high pressure environment like an F1 race track it's hard to control the emotional responses sometimes. I personally don't think crying is a symptom of weakness, especially when it happens after a stressful situation and not during it; it's a symptom of caring about things deeply and that, to me, is a beautiful thing. But my perception of him is that he is always trying, to the best of his abilities, to be fair. And to back his statements with facts (not in this case maybe, but in others). And he's always trying to be respectful of other people and polite to journalists, and it always seems to backfire. Of course it doesn't always work out and he makes mistakes and misjudges things, because that's what humans do, but there isn't much grace extended to him and that just makes me sad, to be honest. It's like people have decided a long time ago what role he should play in this movie playing in their heads and they twist his words and chop his sentences to make him fit in at any costs. It's wildly disrespectful.

[juniorfics]

Favorite color

mina x GN!reader

written by: R

word count: 1.8k

Warning!: one-sided pining, the word dude used as slang, slight angst, and just a wee bit of internalized homophobia (but only for like, a paragraph) ((also, mina might be slightly out of character, so..sorry about that :p))

y/n was distraught.

No, distraught wasn't the right word...conflicted maybe? Well, whatever the correct word is, they were feeling it.

Allow me to give a bit of context; you see, y/n was crushing on someone. Quite aggressively, actually. they couldn't stop thinking about them. the way they smiled, the way their hair bounced slightly when they walked, the way they could brighten a room so easily with only their presence. Yes, y/n was crushing, but that wasn't the issue. they've had many crushes before. So many, some would see it as a bit of a problem. No, the crushing itself wasn't a huge deal, rather, it was who the crush was on. The gender of the person, to be more specific.

y/n was always more attracted to guys, never finding herself attracted to females in any sort of romantic way. But ever since their first year of high school had begun, it seemed to them that that might not be the case anymore. All because of a certain pink-haired individual. Well, pink hair is a bit of an understatement. Everything about her is pink! Her hair, her skin, her personality, everything! And it suited her too, the color pink. She was a very bright and optimistic person, looking to the bright side of things as often as she could, making others happy by just simply being herself. Not to mention she was very pretty to look at, but that’s more of an opinion that can vary from person to person.

It's pretty safe to say that y/n was more than a bit confused when these feelings first emerged. they can practically pinpoint the moment it happened- when all this crushing began. It was during the school festival, back when they were all still first years. To be more precise, it was when 1-A was performing their concert. The two of them hadn't been in the same class at the time, in fact, y/n wasn't even planning on going to the concert at all, but their friend had convinced them that it would be fun, and they eventually caved, agreeing to go only if he would buy them a strawberry-banana crepe afterward. They had managed to get good seats near the front and patiently waited for the show to start. Then, the lights went out, the curtains opened, and a bunch of people, including their friend, began shouting out the name of one of the girls on stage. ‘Fanboys..’ they thought, waiting for the show to start. Then, before they knew it, the music started, and a bunch of dancers came out. That's when they saw her- Ashido. they had remembered her from the sports festival, as well as seeing her in the hallway a few times. they thought nothing of it and continued enjoying the show. But then, something happened that would change y/n’s perception of the world forever- Ashido had winked.

Granted, Ashido hadn't winked directly at her, rather to that general area of the audience, but y/n saw it nonetheless, and suddenly, their heart had started beating faster, their face steadily increasing in temperature, their hands went clammy and their mouth went dry. Why were they feeling like this? they had never reacted to anything as subtle as a wink this aggressively before. Plus, they had never developed a crush for someone this quickly before, ever! Even their fastest crush had taken a day to develop. ‘Wait, crush? No, I can't have a crush on her! That-that's impossible!’ they thought, shaking their head. they had tuned out the rest of the concert at this point. ‘I don’t like her! No, I can't like her! I like guys! Dudes! Men! people who portray as masculine! I don't like girls! Never have, never will!’ they thought, the words sounding like screams to them. 'And besides! The wink probably wasn't even for me. There's no way she could even see me among all these other people! Yeah, it was probably just to the crowd.’ that's what they told themself, but there was a small voice in the back of their mind that stayed with them for the rest of the day, once the concert was over, while they were eating the crepe they were promised, while they were lying in their bed in the middle of the night; “what if it was for me? What if she did see me? What if she winked at me?’

Over the next few months, they had come to terms with their emotions, accepting the fact that they did, indeed, have a crush on Ashido. Well, less of a crush, more of an obsession. But hey, this was how they always handled these things. their feelings were still a bit confusing, but they couldn't just ignore them. they promised themselves a long time ago that they would always acknowledge their feelings, no matter who they were for. So this has become y/n’s current dilemma. They were already halfway through their second year and they hadn't even made an attempt at confessing. However, a few weeks ago, they decided that they would confess on the last day of April.

Which just so happened to be today.

y/n was extremely nervous. they were gonna confess her feelings, of course they were nervous! But they told themself they would, and that's what they were gonna do.

~

The final bell rang, and school was officially over. y/n practically jumped out of their seat, speed walking out of the classroom, and into the hallway. This was it! they were gonna confess her feelings! they had to find Ashido first, though. Luckily, they had memorized Ashido’s schedule, and what hallways she normally took, so this wouldn't really be a problem. Yes, a bit stalkerish, but it came in handy for moments like this. Finally, they got to the hallway they needed to be at and waited for a moment. Soon enough, a bunch of footsteps, along with idle chatter, got closer and closer, and closer, until-

“Aghhh, today’s training was super tough today! I'm so soreee…”

“Right? I can barely feel my legs, it's like I'm walking on jello,”

“It doesn't help that midterms are coming up as well, my brain is just as sore,”

y/n watched as the friend group passed by, not even noticing them. Just when they were far enough so it didn't seem creepy, they walked out, clearing their throat.

“U-um...Ashido?”

The group turned around, signs of confusion on their faces. The girl in question stepped towards them slightly, a small bounce in her step.

“Hmm?”

y/n’s face tinted pink. they hoped it wasn't too noticeable. “U-uh, hi. I-i know you don't know me, b-but do you think I could talk to you for a sec? I-it won't take long, promise!” they blurted out, hands behind their back.

Ashido smiled, thinking it was probably a shy fan or something. “Yea, of course! What's up?”

There was a small silence.

“...a-alone?” y/n muttered, their face getting slightly redder.

Ashido blinked. “Oh, alright!-” she turned to her friends, making a small shooing motion with her hand.- “you guys go on ahead! I'll catch up later,”

“Well, okay. Just don't take too long, or we're gonna get boba tea without you!” the blonde one joked, waving behind him as the other two followed after him. Ashido stuck her tongue out at them, before chuckling and turning back to face y/n.

“So, what were you saying?” she said, smiling at them.

y/n almost had a heart attack. ‘So cute..’ they thought, fidgeting with the hem of their shirt. “W-well, I just wanted to-”

“Wait...you’re the crush dude, right?” Ashido questioned, snapping her fingers as if she had an ‘aha!’ moment.

y/n blinked. “...c-crush dude?”

“Yea! I've heard about you from some of the general student kids!”

“O-oh...well I just wanted to tell you that-”

“Wait, WAIT! Don't tell me...you like one of my friends, right?”

“H-huh? No, that's not-”

“Lemme guess, it's Denki, isn't it? Wait, no, you don't really seem like you’d be into him...what about Hanta? He's pretty cool, and you guys would look good together! Ooh, did you want me to tell him to you? Cause I can do that if you want-”

“ASHIDO!” y/n yelled, getting frustrated. Ashido froze, looking at y/n. She admits that she does have a tendency to talk over people, but she definitely didn't expect someone like y/n to flat out yell at her. y/n took a deep breath, looking back at Ashido.

“Look, i-I'm sorry I yelled, it's just- I have something really important I wanna tell you.” they looked at the ground, their blush getting darker. Ashido wasn't saying anything, so they began speaking again.

“I-i don't like any of your friends...I like you, Ashido. A-and I'm not entirely sure if you swing that way or anything, to be honest, I didn't think I did either, but here I am!” they chuckled nervously, staring at their shoes. “A-anyway, what I'm trying to say is, y-you don't have to reciprocate, I-i just thought you should know.”

they looked up, finally ready to see Ashido's reaction, and- blank. Her face was completely blank. y/n could feel tears welling up in their eyes. Had they said something wrong? Who were they kidding, of course they had. they had confessed to a girl. Ashido probably thought they were super weird. To make matters worse, they’ve never even spoken to each other before this! y/n had completely screwed up. If there was any sort of chance that they could've been friends, let alone romantic partners, it was all gone now. they sniffed, wiping their eyes. they turned around, not wanting to hear any of the comments they expected.

“Hey, wait!”

they froze, turning back around. Ashido was a few steps closer now, a look of concern on her face. She looked like she had to say something, but couldn't find the words to do so. After a few seconds of silence, she spoke, clearly nervous.

“Well, first of all, thank you for telling me. I appreciate it. And, um…” her face began getting pinker. “I...I wouldn't mind going on a date. A-as long as you’re comfortable with it, of course.” she smiled, rubbing the back of her neck.

A date? y/n couldn't believe it. they were speechless. they didn't think they were weird, or a freak, or anything? “You...you don't think I'm weird? We’ve never even talked..”

“Well, that may be true, but that's what dates are for, right? To get to know someone better! Plus, it would be nice being seen in public with someone as cute as you!” she winked, a huge grin on her face.

‘C-cute?!?!? She thinks I'm cute!! Omgomgomgomgomgomgomgomg-’ y/n’s face was practically as red as an apple, but so was Ashido's, so they felt a little bit better about it.

“Y-yeah, a date sounds wonderful,” they said, fidgeting with the hem of their shirt again. “I-i’m free on the 4th!”

“Alrighty then! Here, gimme your phone.”

They then traded numbers, and Ashido ran off to meet up with her friends again, promising to work out the details later. y/n smiled.

Yep, there was no denying it- pink was definitely their favorite color.

[that-rock-chick]

Love Bites

Love sucks. That's pretty much common knowledge. Combine that with addiction, money, fame, and childhood trauma and you've got a recipe for disaster.

Chapter 1

Chapter 2

Chapter 3

Chapter 4

Same shit, different fucking day.

Don't ask me how I'm balancing six days a week at my job and band practice three to four days a week, because I truly have no fucking idea. I tried college but once the band formed, I cut that out of my schedule completely.

It's been about a months since the argument with Gwen and Tiffany went down and our band hasn't practiced. I tried to be sympathetic for the longest time, but it's beyond ridiculous now. Veronica, Tiffany, and I have been wanting to do band stuff but Gwen refuses because she's mad that Tiffany is dating a man SHE broke up with. It's not like Tiffany did it intentionally, and the fact that she's letting her own personal stuff interfere with our band is really pissing me off.

We've all got shit going on, but Gwen loves being a drama queen. Veronica has suggested kicking her out of the band a few times and Tiffany has echoed the same sentiment, but I don't think my patience has thinned to that extent just yet.

But it's getting there.

Young musicans aren't hard to come by, but finding someone who fits the band's sound as perfectly as Gwen's adds on a large layer of difficulty that I'm not prepared for. We'd have to start all over, teach our new singer the songs, establish chemistry...it seems exhausting and more trouble than it's worth, at least for the time being.

"Hey Julie." Dylan greeted me as I walked past, something he does whenever we work together. Sometimes it ends up being the best part of my day.

As the day progresses, I find myself smiling a lot more than I usually do. Customers are easier to deal with and a large amount of them were actually friendly. It created a light-hearted atmosphere in the restaurant that we don't get too often, unfortunately. The time seemed to fly by.

"Good luck Dylan." I said goodbye and walked out of the front door. Dylan was always there a hour before I arrived, and an hour before I left. The rest of the staff is pretty cool, but Dylan is the only one I'd consider to be a friend of mine. He's essentially the less musically inclined male version of me.

I head to our rehearsal space for the second time this week. I've extended the invitation to Gwen, as if she needs an invitation to show up to her own fucking band's rehearsal. If she doesn't show up tonight, she's out. Our time is just as important as hers and we're all tired of it being wasted.

I'm usually the first person to show up, but some days that isn't the case, like today.

"Hey." Gwen says shyly.

I give her a blank stare and proceeded to put my things down on a table nearby.

"Nice of you to finally decided to show up." I stated plainly.

"Look, I know I've missed a lot of practice and I totally understand the three of you being pissed at me, but can you please take one second to see this from my perspective?"

I couldn't help but scoff at what was coming out of Gwen's mouth. Has she seriously taken an objective look at the situation and came to the conclusion that she has a leg to stand on.

"Okay fine. You broke up with a guy, he moved onto Tiffany, you were so jealous that he wasn't falling you around like a lost puppy, and you took it out on Tiffany."

Gwen rolled her eyes but before she could speak, Tiffany and Veronica entered the room. Anger was written all over Tiffany's face, while Veronica seemed to be as cool as a cucumber.

That's one thing I've always liked about Veronica. She can keep her cool in some pretty tough situations. That's not all there is to like about her, though. She's utterly gorgeous. Her dark skin and hair that was almost always styled in an afro were truly beautiful features that I couldn't help but admire. She's beautiful, smart, talented, and has an amazing personality. She's the full package.

"What the fuck are you doing here?" Tiffany wasted no time begining the screaming match we all knew was about to go down.

"We're in the same band." Gwen managed to maintain her regular tone of voice, but if I know Tiff like I think I do, and trust me, I do, she'll keep going until she sets Gwen off and then everything will go up in flames.

"Clearly the band hasn't been very high on your list of priorities for the past four weeks. Finally make time in your schedule for us, princess?" Tiffany was speaking with her genuine emotions, but part of her wanted to get a reaction out of Gwen. She knows how Gwen feels about being called "princess".

Gwen looks like she wants to say something to Tiffany that would no doubt escalate the situation even further, but she takes a deep breath and regains her composure.

"I'm sorry, okay? For everything. Julie was right, I should've maintained my professionalism above all else...and I shouldn't have put some guy over you and our friendship."

The three of us looked at Gwen semi-shocked. That girl never apologizes for anything. Instead of responding, Tiffany tells Veronica and I that she's stepping out for a smoke.

I'm not sure if we should discuss things further or let bygones be bygones, but it's not exactly my place to make that call.

Tiffany returns just as I finshed tuning my guitar and walked up to Gwen. If I didn't know Tiffany, I'd say she was going to punch Gwen in the face with the speed she was moving.

"That whole situation was fucked up, but I know how hard it is for you to apologize to people, so I forgive you." Tiffany pulls Gwen in for a hug and for the first time in awhile, things seem okay between the four of us.

"I would like to reiterate that Gwendolyn said I was right." I smiled proudly.

"Yeah, don't get used to hearing that from me."

It was nice while it lasted, at least.

Band practice turned out to be super productive, and it hasn't been that way in a long time. We got a lot of work done today and hopefully we can keep this up for awhile. We spent about 7 hours in our rehearsal space and it felt more like 5 minutes. Time really does fly when you're surrounded by positivity.

The girls and I said our goodbyes and parted ways for the night. Tiffany had mentioned that we haven't seen each other this past month like we usually do. Of course I feel bad about that, she's been my best friend for so long. But I've been spending a lot of time with the Guns N' Roses boys...Axl in particular can be a persuasive little shit when he wants to be. I've already told the guys that Tiffany's birthday is this weekend and they can't keep monopolizing my time. I need more feminine energy!

"Julie!" I hear someone call out. I recognize the voice as soon as it hits my ears.

"Hey Slash, what's up?"

Minus Izzy, I'm becoming pretty close with the members of Guns N' Roses. I just wish that man wasn't so goddamn illusive.

Slash and I walk and talk. Clearly he's decided we're hanging out tonight. I don't mind it much since Tiffany's going out with Victor tonight, Gwen is visiting her parents, and Veronica is doing god knows what, like always. So even if I wanted to make plans with someone, it's not like I had anyone else anyway.

"I don't think anyone's at the house, besides Izzy." From the way he phrased his sentence, it was a clear indication that Slash had no interest in staying at the "Hell House" with Izzy, he usually opted to spend his nights the same way he spent his days: completely wasted. It didn't matter if it was alcohol or heroin, if it got him high, he'd take it.

But this isn't about Slash. I want to see Izzy...I might have a slight obsession with a man who has never even said a single word to me, but I mean, he's absolutely gorgeous. There's something about him that keeps me drawn to him and I'm determined to figure out what it is. No matter how long it takes me.

"Then let's go to the house."

Before Slash can process what I said so he could say no, I grab him by the arm and run as fast as I possibly can while dragging a grown man behind me. It only takes about 15 seconds of running before I realized, Slash in tow or not, I'm very out of shape. I'm running out of breath, determined to get to the band's house. I'll be wheezing all the way down Sunset Boulevard and trying to convince myself it's worth it by the time we get there. But knowing me, it won't.

We enter the house and lo and behold...

Izzy isn't there. Despite me struggling to breathe, the look of defeat plasters my face and Slash starts laughing his ass off.

"Izzy's out working, I just wanted to see how you'd react. Sure didn't think you'd go runnin to our house, though." Slash manages to get out through his fit of hysterical laughter.

"Slash! Why the hell would you do that?"

"Because I know you like him. I got the confirmation I needed. Just wait until I tell Duff!" Slash heads for the stairs, but I grab his arm before he starts his ascent.

"You cannot tell Duff." I tell him seriously.

"He can't tell Duff what?" Duff appears from the kitchen

"And why are you out of breath? And why are you holding Slash's arm?"

"She totally likes Izzy, dude. I told her that he was here and she dragged me through the streets. We almost got hit by like, 5 cars."

My shocked face slowly twists into a look of confusion as Duff rolls his eyes, pulls out his wallet, and hands Slash a 20 dollar bill.

"Dude, you guys bet on whether I liked Izzy or not?" I was part shocked, part confused, and part mortified that my crush on Izzy was that obvious. Izzy seems like a smart man, so I couldn't stop thinking about the possibility of him knowing and not talking to me because I'm a weird chick who likes him without even knowing anything about him.

"Yeah, and now I'm out 20 bucks because you can't control your goddamn hormones." Duff says in mock frustration. I ignore his joke as the overthinking sets in further.

"Does...does he know?"

"Nah. The man's pretty oblivious, plus he doesn't pay much attention to anything except drugs, work, and music. It's fine." Duff reassures me.

Then Izzy walks in. The three of us get quiet when he shuts the door behind him. He looked at the guys then looks me up and down. He then looks back up at my face like he's done several times before, but this time he doesn't look away when our eyes meet, not immediately, at least. I feel my heart start beating a mile a minute at the momentary eye contact and feel myself longing for it again when it breaks.

He nods his head and walks up the stairs. I guess his first words to me will have to wait another day.

"What does Izzy do for work?" I ask, to no one in particular.

"He's a drug dealer." Duff replies nonchalantly.

I don't know how to respond to that, so I don't. Slash and Duff have their own conversation and I find myself wondering what kind of person Izzy is. I don't know what to think. All I know is he's a damn good musician, an equally gifted writer, and a drug dealer.

Who the hell is Izzy Stradlin?

[kneamet]

Delusion (3/5)

Trigger Warning: alcohol, drugs

Summary: she was the only girl in his band whose singing he loved so much. She was the person he truly respected. Andy Miles was someone Hank Williams had an unrelenting obsession with.

Chapter three: The house

POV Andy

Andy didn't like cleaning. It wasn't that she didn't like it, it wasn't the least favorite thing to do. Why clean up at all if you're already littering up? It's such a pain in the ass. Not that her home was a complete mess, as Miles would have called it a creative approach to what she loved. It was easier to concentrate on the rhyme when everything was out of place.

Otherwise, she would have noticed that something was standing unevenly or even out of place. Therefore, she did not bother much with the order, trying to do music in her free time, as much as possible, and not cleaning.

It is better to do what you love than to miss the rush of inspiration, which can go away as suddenly as it appeared. Inspiration is one of the most difficult feelings, which is incredibly difficult to achieve. It can be both fleeting and haunt you for a long time.

Andy sighed, shaking her head and feeling her eyes begin to close. She wanted to lie down on the bed and go to sleep, but she knew she couldn't do that, because Don would be arriving soon. And why today? Why on a day when she didn't get enough sleep?

The first eye twitched and she closed her eyes for a couple of seconds, trying to give them a little respite and let them enjoy the pleasant darkness. Clenching her fist so that it was slightly white, Andy opened her eyes, trying to find the jar with her eyes.

His eyes immediately caught on a small wooden table in the middle of the room, on which stood a small, yellow-wrapped, battered jar, the label of which had long since been erased, which was surprising. It was bought not so long ago. Only a week ago.

Her lower jaw began to tremble slightly, and Andy stood up quickly, trying not to fall and swallowing the pills as quickly as possible. They worked very well, giving her an influx of inspiration. After them, you immediately felt that you were omnipotent and could move mountains.

"Fuck”.

Opening the white lid and shifting it to her other hand, Andy swallowed when she found only two pills there. Her hand trembled, and she realized that this should be enough. Maybe for a day or two, but then she'd have to buy a supply of new ones, since she wasn't sure if she really had any jars left on the kitchen shelves.

Putting the small white pills in her mouth, Andy, feeling a great need for them, immediately swallowed them. Her hands stopped shaking, and a bitter taste was sharply felt in her throat, which was not the most pleasant effect and it was better to wash down the pill with something sweet to kill the taste.

Miles, unable to find anything sweet and healthy, and too lazy to go for water, turned her attention to the half-finished bottle of beer and reached for it. Presenting it, the girl's nose immediately caught the yeast smell and she gulped down the remaining drink. The taste made itself felt: there was a sweetness in her throat.

Suddenly, a signal sounded from the window, which was unpleasant to hear on a slightly drunk head.

***

My head was splitting with pain, but these were the first stages of what is usually present after taking the pills. The second stage was that the stomach began to ache with an indefinable pain, but soon it faded and it subsided. The mind was completely cleared of obsessive thoughts and was in full sanity.

With a jerk of her hand, she grabbed her temple, pressing it lightly with her middle finger, as if trying to find a point of pain and calm it down. Or at least make it a little nicer. Although it was possible to get used to this for a long time, or at least just take the pain for granted in order to get the desired effect of inspiration in the future, but with each new time, Andy's mind simply wished that these pills were taken.

Andy inhaled deeply and smelled the smoke-filled smell. The smell of the car mingled with the Camel cigarettes that Don loved so much for their surprisingly mild taste. Although Miles didn't particularly like them, preferring Chesterfield more because of their cheapness and tart taste after smoking a cigarette. The tobacco left a slight bitterness.

She shivered, pressing her lips into a thin line, feeling the second temple begin to ache with exactly the same negative pain and a weightless thud echoing in the back of her brain.

She rubbed her fingers over her temples, trying to stop the sickness, and closed her eyes. She needed to focus on something else. Something that would help her control her thoughts.

"Don, Andy, how are you?" an eerily familiar voice that carried only concern was heard, and a smile appeared on the girl's face. Hank.

She raised her head, seeing the intent gaze fixed on her. Miles nodded her head at him, as if to let him know that she was doing great, and that she was basking in joy. Although it may not have been visible from the outside, but a smile soaked in fake was on Andy's face. She didn't want anyone to worry about her. I've already experienced such moments in my life, stop being a mumbler.

"Not bad," Don chuckled, turning his head to look at Hank, who was getting into the backseat next to Andy. The girl raised an eyebrow, biting her lower lip and pulling a small piece of skin off with her teeth. Leaning back against the chair, Andi straightened her back and focused her gaze on the beige roof panel.

"I'm fine, too," she muttered, watching in her peripheral vision as Williams shook Don's hand and he started the car. Blinking, Andy has a quick thought that Hank is acting extremely suspicious, but it disappears from his mind just as it appears. It's just her imagination under the drugs, nothing more.

The car begins to itch with a slight tremor and soon starts moving. Andy looks at the road, making sure it's a comfortable ride or a rolling one.

"Where are you going to live, buddy?" Helms 'voice rings out, and Miles' eyes flick to the boy. She raises an eyebrow, and Hank gives her a hard, doubtful look. Shouldn't he and Audrey have shared out the budget and what went to whom? Wasn't their divorce finalized yet?

There was a gasp from Williams.

"I think l'll have to stay in a cheap hotel. I don't have much money right now," he ran a hand through his dark, greasy hair, pulling it back a little. It was as if his thoughts were far away and he didn't want to talk about it.

"What about Audrey?"

"She's just fine," the doubt and uncertainty seeping out of the guy's voice was understandable. It was obvious that he was trying to hide it. And Andy didn't particularly like it.

Miles pursed her lips, closing her eyes and carefully trying to control the thoughts that were racing through her mind at an unbearable speed. Hank needed help, though he carefully denied it and decried any such attention to himself.

Her headache had subsided, and now she could think straight, except for the fact that in a couple of minutes her stomach would also be hurting, but that was nothing. Right now, Hank needed help. He needed to show her what Andy hadn't given him last time. She won't screw up this time.

"Your pupils are dilated," a voice said, and the girl didn't even notice how intently she was looking at the guy. Blinking, his vision was back to normal. "Is everything all right?"

She couldn't help but smile. She liked Hank's concern for her. She needed it, feeling completely at ease after being given attention and support. He was the person who really paid attention to her condition and sympathy.

Miles was sure that as soon as she fell ill and lay down with the disease, Williams would immediately put everything aside and rush to her aid, trying to recover from the pain. And such care on the part of the guy she was terribly flattered.

***

"Are you sure it doesn't hurt?" Hank was lightly touching Miles ' bruised arm, where a bottle had broken on stage, scratching her arm and leaving her with no money in her pocket to finish the "performance" at a local bar.

Biting her lip between her teeth, Miles nodded to the air, noticing how quickly the guy reacted to this, trying to touch her skin even more gently and weightlessly.

"It'll do."

"You shouldn't have been drinking today..." he muttered, shaking his head and continuing to touch the cotton wool that was soaked in the alcohol solution.

Andy's brow furrowed. Since when does Hank regret the past? That doesn't sound like him. He lives in the present day and certainly rarely remembers the past.

"Really, who do you think offered me alcohol?" raises an eyebrow Miles. The tone of her voice was very sarcastic. It was evident that she was beginning to laugh at her friend.

***

"Never mind," Andy waved away the question Williams had asked a few seconds ago. Admitting to him that she was using would make her life even more hectic. The care was pleasant, but only in moderation. She didn't want him prying into her drug-and alcohol-related personal life.

It is better to let him remain in happy ignorance than in the treacherous truth. To reveal a secret that she had kept with a loved one since childhood would be wrong on her part, because otherwise what would be the point of hiding it?

The car was twitching slightly. The suspensions were loose, which was especially noticeable in the rear seats, distracting from thoughts.

Seeing that Hank didn't really believe her light, superficial lie, he only gave her a quick, serious look, which was completely out of keeping with his temperament.

"You're staying with me tonight," Interrupting the subject and recalling the previous conversation, Andy looked back at Hank, nodding at him. He was looking at her with a look that clearly wondered why she would think that.

Miles wanted to thank him. She had not felt such affection and awe towards herself for a long time, so every time she felt a manifestation of love, she succumbed to her feelings and she wanted to show that she was addressing a person with the same care.

***

Miles hoped that the guy wouldn't notice the mess that accompanied her house in all the rooms. Although how can you not notice that all over the living room are scattered sketches of songs and crumpled pieces of paper that would be easier to throw away.

However, Andy still didn't touch anything, because very often it happened that she found rhyme and the right sensual lines that would take your breath away, to other lines written on different pieces of paper.

"Don't pay attention to the mess," Andy advised, pursing her lips as Hank's eyes scanned the living room. Andy sighed. No, he had to look in the place where it was dirty and not cleaned up.

Williams raised his eyebrows, gripping his dark suitcase in his right hand and swallowing, turned his attention to the girl, opening his mouth slightly.

"Where can I stay?" He scratched his head, tilting it towards the living room, hinting that he would stay in the living room. This was not such a bad decision, as long as he did not touch anything and did not disturb the creative mess.

"I only have one bedroom," Andy hesitated, nodding toward the living room. She could have given him a place in her bedroom and taken the living room herself, which would have been very decent, but it would have been impossible to sleep on this sofa in the living room, since it was quite hard. "You can sleep there, and I'll sleep in the living room until you can find a place to live in," or until he and Audrey make up.

She knew that the subject of Audrey, a painful subject, was not worth mentioning at all, and it was better to keep quiet about it. Miles knew that they would make up sooner or later, but lately, with the current circumstances, those feelings were disappearing and thoughts of reconciliation were disappearing.

Audrey and Hank were a really good couple, but their quarrels were outrageous. This is what destroyed what they were creating. It ruined their marriage, which was held together by thin threads, ready to break up at any second.

Andy blinked, then turned her attention back to Hank, who seemed to be saying something. His voice seemed blurred in her thoughts. And apparently realizing that the first time he was not listened to, he repeated:

"Are you sure I won't push you?"

His smile was pleasant, and she knew that Hank had agreed to her terms.

In fact, her house was really her very large size. We were happy with what we had enough money for, but sometimes it was really very cramped to live here, even alone, what can we say about two people. How do people get a couple, living in such unpleasant conditions? Andy would never understand them, she was sure.

"I'll sleep on the couch for now, but you can still take my room. I'll make room for you," the girl muttered as she brushed past her friend and opened the white door to her bedroom. It's not the first time she's slept in a different bed. “In the meantime, look around the house."

[novarasalas]

Second Look Review: ‘A Little Adventure’

And here begins a review series of Voltron’s season 7, written up as i re-watch it. This is equal parts as a writing exercise and as me just wanting to share my thoughts and observations.

I’ll try to go light on meta and theories, sticking to just the facts, ma’am.

Well, that’s what I intended to happen, but this episode was very personal from the start, what with all the Shiro backstory. 

So join me for this two-part review, where I switch on the projection machine and smash the overshare button.

Part 1: Laugh So You Don’t Cry

Let’s start with the easy stuff, yeah? 

It features Coran, finally going full Thornberry:

...truly gorgeous.

We also have this amazing pair here:

And, most unexpectedly, a demonstration of yalmors linking at the ears, something we haven’t heard about since season 1:

I don’t have much else to say about this part. I would, however, like to formally request a spin off of Hunk and Romelle being so, so done with everything.

Part 2: The Meeting

So hey! It’s that back story everyone’s been screaming for, and boy, does this episode deliver. I really wish it had been solely dedicated to that story, though. I’m not a fan of the high drama/humorous aside splits they keep giving us. I know they do that to keep things interesting, cause hey, rated TV-Y7, right? But I always come out the other side of it feeling like I have emotional whiplash.

First, look at this:

Thank you.

So Shiro’s a bit of a celebrity? That’s pretty cool. I’m impressed.

Too bad Keith isn’t.

He’s even in the classic “anime protagonist seat”. Oh, Keith.

The subtitles here say: Shiro broke the record for the fastest orbital velocity, beating the old heliocentric speed by about 50 kilometers per second. 

I’m a big damn nerd, so you know I had to look this up. Here’s what I found:

In 2018 though, a new NASA mission - Solar Probe Plus - will be launched. Designed to come as close as 8.5 solar radii to the Sun (that’s about about 5.9 million kilometers or 3.7 million miles), it will hit orbital velocities as high as 200 kilometers a second (450,000 miles an hour).

To just put that incredible figure into perspective - going this fast would get you from the Earth to the Moon in about ½ an hour. It is also about 0.067% the speed of light. (source: Scientific American -”The Fastest Spacecraft Ever?”)

I have no idea if they’re counting his record against something like that, or manned flight, for which the record is 107,000 km/h. That’s uh..that’s us. On Earth. We haven’t sent people into independent solar orbit yet.

Also, one day I’ll learn how to post links without breaking the tags, cause my source article was very interesting. Please go find it.

And now we have the simulator. We get that call back to “Taking Flight”, which I found to be a nice touch.

Keith, you’re the only one who could possibly fly through this.

And then Keith steals Shiro’s car and his heart, wasting no time in attempting to push him away. And he doesn’t just keep it between the two of them; Keith’s got a lot of misguided anger to share.

Nothing will endear you to your new classmates faster than signing the whole group up for a collective punishment.

But lessons are learned and everyone calms down.

..oh. Whoops.

Yes, the good ol’ collective punishment: let the jerkass’ peers sort them out. And maybe it would have worked in this case, except for the fact that Keith respects exactly no one.

When this episode first aired, I was seeing yelling about James being a bully, but to be honest, this is more of a case of two shithead kids being shitheads to each other. Keith doesn’t care how his actions affect others, and James reacted by going for a low blow about Keith’s parents.

I suppose they sorted each other out in the end, didn’t they?

So here’s Keith, the angry, lost kid, acting out in desperation and loneliness, and Shiro, who we now see risking his own good name to help him.

Why would he do that?

Now, a lot of what I come up with in the next part is my interpretation of Shiro based on my own experiences, because that’s all I have to go on. My one big gripe about this is that we don’t see Shiro until he’s a young adult. What was he like growing up? Does he try to help Keith because he’s a sweet guy, or does he relate to him in some way?

We may never really know. For my own purposes, I’m going to assume that it’s more of the latter.

Let’s look back at this interaction:

Shiro: “That’s the Calypso, the first ship to carry astronauts to the moons of Jupiter.”

Keith: “It took them three years to get there. Longest voyage of its kind.”

Shiro: “That’s right. Reading about that mission is what made me wanna be a pilot. Those astronauts braved the unknown.”

Nerd break: 

The Juno probe made it to Jupiter in 5 years, arriving in 2015.

Right now it takes 9.5 years to get to Pluto

/nerd

Keith knows about the Calypso. You might think that the tiny, emo kid doesn’t seem the type to be into nerd stuff, right?

But I get it.

I didn’t have the best time growing up, and we know that after the death of his father, neither did Keith. I had one big obsession that got me through the badness: space. Sorry, two: space and dinosaurs. And giant mech shows. Er...three big obsessions.

But space was the biggest and realest. The 90s were an exciting time for space exploration, with the Voyager probes finishing up their grand tours, the ISS being built, and the first rovers being sent to Mars. It felt good. It felt hopeful.

And I think maybe Keith may have felt the same about space. After all, space was a big unknown. By nature, it couldn’t be good or bad, right? Not like home.

Or maybe it’s because he’s half Galra and always knew that he wasn’t fully of Earth. Or maybe it was both.

I can imagine that Shiro may have thrown himself into space for similar reasons. Because you know what really sucks having deal with growing up? Chronic Illness.

Part 3: Invisible

We come to realize, right along with Keith, that Shiro is sick.

When I’d first heard about this, I was both saddened and ecstatic. It’s not often that I get to relate in any way to a strong, capable, wonderful fictional character. ‘Cool!’, I thought to myself, ‘He’s a sicko like me.’ Immediately, my next thought was ‘Damn, he’s a sicko like me…’

Then a few things about his character began to fall into place.

I think we all noticed Shiro pushing Keith into the place of leadership via the phrase “If anything ever happens to me...”. And Shiro being chronically ill explains that. I’d been wondering for a while about what Shiro’s deal could be. Why did he think something was going to happen to him? Was is just planning for every eventuality, or was it something else?

Shiro’s a great leader, so it was probably both. But him being ill puts a new perspective on things.

When you’re chronically ill, you have to think about things a lot more than other people. You have to plan heavily for ‘what ifs’, and you had better be prepared. 

Back in July, a friend and I took a trip to a con. This had been the first trip I’ve been on in years since I’ve been so damn sick. The preparation alone was exhausting. I had to make sure I had everything with me, and backups of everything just in case something happened. I had to make sure my meds and supplies were in reach if I needed them right away, but I also had to make sure that they were cool and out of the summer sun, because if they got too hot, they’d stop working.

The con was six hours away from home, and if I had needed replacements of these things, I would have to make soooo many phone calls and likely beg for help.

I had to have a conversation with my friend about what to do in case I had “an incident”. It’s humiliating; I’m a grown ass adult that has to preemptively ask people for help. Even though she’s my best friend, and I trust her so very much, it sucks.

In the end, everything was fine, but only because of careful planning. I can’t tell you how much I miss the days of just being able to go, to do, to not have to think about everything that could go wrong and possibly kill me.

So what I’m really saying here is that Shiro most likely has a lot of experience planning for eventualities. He’s also swallowed enough of his pride to discuss these things with Keith by the time the main story begins. And note: it’s only Keith he shares these things with, not the others. I don’t share these things with people who aren’t very, very close to me either.

Well, present company excluded, of course.

And here’s the part that  I go projecting onto Shiro again, but as I said previously, until they give more backstory, it’s all I have to go on.

So, what about Shiro’s family?

That’s something that’s been talked about in the fan space for a while, too. Is he an orphan? Did they disown him? Unfortunately, the flashbacks we get don’t go back that far. All I have to go on to answer that are my own experiences, which are not good.

My heart swells every time I see someone talk about how their family supports them as they deal with their illnesses. How good it is that they have love and stability to help them through.

I don’t have that. I never did. My home life sucked before I got sick, and illness certainly didn’t help.  I can say with certainty that if I had spent years in space out of contact with them, I wouldn’t be too broken up about it. There’d have been no video messages home, is what I’m saying.

I could see Shiro at this point in the flashbacks, gifted and celebrated, throwing himself at everything he could, working hard to prove that he’s worth something, proving that you’re not a lost cause just because you’re sick. I found myself wanting to prove things, too, taking on tasks and making plans and trying to show the world that I’m still useful, that I’m not lazy. See? I didn’t cause my own illness in an attempt to get out of responsibilities.

You’ll still get rejected, though.

So you learn to hide your illness from people that don’t need to know about it.

Shiro may have been like Keith: a lost, angry kid, pushing people away before they can make the decision to leave. It’s a difficult thing to grow up and only see disappointment in the eyes of the people who are supposed to be there for you. Again and again, they let you know in so many ways that you’re difficult to deal with, that somehow you’re a burden on them.

I can’t know for sure about Shiro, but I know that this is the truth for Keith. I completely understand why Keith would end up so attached to Shiro, the only person who was actually putting in a real effort to help him. I wish I’d had my own Shiro, ya know?

I can’t be all doom and gloom about this, though. I still like that one idea that Shiro was raised by his grandparents. I like to think that it was a happier time for him, as my time spent with my own grandparents was for me.

Of course, I could be completely wrong about all of this, and projecting way too much of my own problems onto him. For the sake of any alternate realities where Shiro is a real person, I hope that I am. 

Next up: Part 2 - relationships are hard -and- an appeal to societies greater sensibilities.

[ac-jarl-vahlia]

Hale

Hello everyone! This is my first time writing a fic, please bear with me OTZ To anyone who’ll give it a try, I’d like to apologize and thank you beforehand... Comments and suggestions are welcome :)

This is an AU in p3p where Miki is alive, Aki is a big baby, and Shinji is the mother goose who could foresee the future -- heads up for a lot of cursing, OOCitis, and MinakoxShinjiro.

Oh, and P3P is owned by Atlus

Anyway, here goes! :D

Bright red flame.  That was now all he could see on the place that they once called a home.  He couldn’t quite process what exactly happened, but he knew that it was really terrible.  All he could do was stare dumbly at the burning orphanage, as the scene is now shrouded by the hysterical cries of everyone around him.  The most deafening was Aki’s, who was now kneeling beside a body which he recognized to be Miki, and that was when Shinji started bawling himself.

Shinjiro tried to wipe his tears though he couldn’t stop them from coming, and the moment he opened his eyes again, the vision of the growing fire disappeared. He was then by himself, standing on a blank plane with nothing but blinding light.

“Don’t cry, Shinji,” a gentle voice called out to him.

He turned toward its direction.  Standing behind him was a girl with crimson eyes, auburn hair, and a calming, new, yet seemingly familiar face.

Wiping the tears on his cheeks, she leaned down and repeated herself, “Please don’t cry, Shinji.”

“B-but… Miki and Aki, they-“

“Don’t worry, Shinji.  It will be alright.”

“Really?  Are you sure?”

“I’ll make sure everything will be right this time.  I’ll protect them, I swear.  I’ll protect you.”

Her gentle smile slowly reassured Shinjiro, and when she patted his head, he was finally lulled.

The moment he woke up, Shinjiro remembered the nightmare.  He tried to look for the girl who even swore that she’ll protect them, but all he saw were the other kids at the orphanage, still soundly sleeping.

It was a good thing that the siblings, Aki and Miki, heard him suddenly bawling like a baby and got up to go by his side. They tried to comfort Shinjiro, but he couldn’t help himself from crying even more after seeing Miki.  His panting and sobbing then continued, but not until Akihiko laughed at him, saying that ten year olds don’t wet their beds.

The dream kept him terrified the whole day and Shinjiro knew there’s something he had to do to keep that from happening.  No, he knew what he must do, so when they were on an escapade and Miki reminded that it was already time for them to go back to the orphanage, Shinjiro insisted to stay and continue playing. As he expected, Miki refused, so Shinjiro went on to execute his foolproof plan.  He began crying and rolling on the ground, begging to not return yet, and then the deal was sealed.

After playing way past their curfew and arriving at the farthest train station that Shinjiro swore he knew in the area (or second nearest, in actuality), they have finally agreed to go back as Akihiko complained for the tenth time of how hungry he is and looked about ready to punch or bite Shinjiro, whichever comes first.

Moments later, Shinjiro found himself in the same situation that he had in the dream.

The orphanage was burning down, and Aki was crying hysterically.  Mouth agape, he fell to his knees, knowing everything was almost like the scene in his nightmare.  The only difference this time is that Miki is standing beside her brother, weeping with him.

It has been a month since Shinjiro started having those dreams that ended up as reality the following day.  At first, he got so excited and even blurted out that he could see the future.  Aki and Miki were also amused, but later didn’t mind and shrugged it off as a kid’s random story, while the others never took him seriously.

Shinjiro has long known that those dreams were precognitions, but since that day when he managed to save Miki, he knew that it was an incredible gift meant for great things, like playing tricks on Aki, and yeah, other great things.

Though, as expected from a kid, it became hard for Shinji to take matters on his own hand, let alone answer the questions that he had in mind. First, he couldn’t figure out the identity of the girl who would always appear at the end of his dreams.  As he was thinking carefully about it, Shinjiro was tall compared to the other kids of age ten in the orphanage, but the red-haired girl was still a lot taller than him.  Who knows how many years older she is than him?

…Wait, she’s very pretty, and she was really nice to me, so if she’s an old hag, then she could be a goddess!

Another thing that Shinji didn’t anticipate since the incident was the fact that in his continuous dreams, Miki was still dead. The first time he realized this, he didn’t know what to do.  It was like a different world, much darker than where he is now.  Every time he had the chance, he always asked the goddess about it, but all she ever did was smile and say, “I told you, we’ll make it right this time.”

It took too long for Shinji, about a year of mishaps between him and Aki, to piece it all together on his own and somehow conclude that he had actually created an alternate reality from the one in his visions.

On his first week in middle school, Shinjiro had been fully aware that he has altered a lot from the occurrences in his dreams.  They were all still together; Miki was alive, and Akihiko didn’t have a reason to be obsessed over getting stronger.  Heck, the other world’s Aki was doomed as fuck, far from the naïve, cheerful kid who’s always beside him, but even after Shinjiro had learned of his dreams as mere fragments of a reality parallel from theirs, he couldn’t help but overthink and get paranoid.

Everything was a lot more peaceful than in his so-called precognitions, which made him more nervous and confused.

The visions are basically useless now, what the heck am I supposed to do? Should I really relax, now that everything isn’t the way they’re supposed to be?  Besides, she’s not even answering my questions… so much for a guardian goddess.

Taking his usual route to school, his train of thought was then broken by a hand that hardly patted his back.

“Hey, I told you to wait for me this time.”

Shinjiro sighed in exasperation, “Then you shouldn’t have eaten all those rice bowls, Aki.”

“I’m a growing man, I need calories.”

“Whatever.”

“Come on, Shinji, what are you acting all tough for?” A grin then sprawled on the gray haired guy’s face, “are you hoping for a middle school debut or something?”

“I’m a delinquent, you won’t get it,” Shinjiro immediately blurted out, which caused a laugh from the other boy.

“That being said by the guy who used to pee on his bed. A lot.”

“Shut up, Aki.” Feeling uneasy, and knowing that the vision-Shinjiro’s personality is finally rubbing off on him, he tried to divert the other guy’s attention. “Hey, have you joined any club yet?”

…I know I’ve altered a lot, and I don’t know why I’m hoping this, but please be in the boxing club.

His hope was broken by Akihiko’s response, “I’m in the soccer team.”

“…well, never would’ve pegged you for one who plays soccer.”

“Yeah, me neither.”

“What? …wait, do you even know how to play?”

“Nope, not a clue.”

“…You’re an idiot.”

“Shut up. What about you? What club are you in this time?”

Shinjiro’s smirked slipped as the answer escaped his lips, “Home economics.”

Weeks later, Shinjiro learned through his visions that Akihiko being in the soccer team and not in the boxing club was an extreme wrong turn.  When Shinjiro told her about this, the goddess even teased him, or threatened, he wasn’t sure, she was always just smiling, “you have led us halfway to our doom,” then proceeded on flashing her ever glorious laugh as Shinjiro panicked over what he should do next.

In order to get back on familiar grounds, or prepare them for everything, Shinjiro spent the following months fretting over making Akihiko stronger and pushing him to join the boxing club instead, but as expected, the guy adamantly refused, which made Shinjiro frustrated and once again try to get matters on his own hand, thus training Aki on his own.

What’s a better way to get back the guy’s damn speed and reflex other than throwing things at him randomly? Smashing stuff at him also worked, and was also so damn fulfilling.  By the start of the second semester, Akihiko was finally able to foresee, dodge, and even counter all of his attacks.  This made Shinjiro proud of the kid, but not enough to make him stop entirely.

The following year, however, when Miki entered as freshman on the same middle school and decided to join the boxing club, Akihiko followed suit.  In the end, Shinjiro thought, he shouldn’t have fussed over the brat. Whoever the hell knew that the siscon will solve it himself?

“I’m moving out.”

Akihiko’s statement that one evening on their third year in junior high didn’t surprise Shinjiro at all, contrary to how Miki initially reacted to her brother’s sudden declaration.

A few more minutes of trying to calm her down, Miki finally replied, “Well, I’m not mad, Aki-nii, but why is it so sudden?”

“Relax, Miki.  Maybe your brother just got hitched or somethin’,” Shinjiro teasingly interjected.

Miki nudged him and pouted, “Not funny, Shinji-nii.”

“Well, not immediately, but,” Akihiko sighed in defeat and sat down beside Miki, “I’ll be graduating this year, I mean, I have to prepare ahead for high school, so I’ll move in to the dorms and—“

“Man, don’t try bullshitting your way outta this,” Shinjiro laughed.

“Dammit, Shinji.”

This time, Miki was the one who heaved a sigh on both of them, “It’s fine, Aki-nii. Just… take care of yourself, okay?”

“Yeah, of course I will,” her brother finally smiled, relief evident on his face.

“And if matters turn to worse, remember that Mama Shinji will save the day, okay?” she said, winking at Shinji.

“What? How is he my problem still?  Anyway, I ain’t gonna stop you or anything.” I pretty much already know where you’re going and why. Heck, the other world’s Shinjiro was guilty of only joining SEES because that Aki did. “All I gotta say is—“  How the hell did you even get a persona this time? To be recruited to the team, that was the major requirement. So. How? “…crap, nevermind.”

“Aaaaww… Are you embarrassed, Shinji-nii? Come on, say it.”

“Don’t worry, Shinji. I’ll miss you too.”

“Fuck you, Aki.”

Dark sky, green moon – the Dark Hour.  They were sent out on another mission to defeat a rampant shadow and secure the area.  In this case, there were two bystanders, a woman and a child, and Mitsuru has once again reminded them that their safety is the top priority of the group.  As such, she immediately instructed the civilians to hide on the alley behind them and reminded both him and Aki to keep an eye on the two.

Of course, things went smoothly as Mitsuru has planned. They have figured out that the shadow’s attack and defense were pretty low, and though it can control minds in close proximity and summon lesser shadows which proved to be problematic ticking time bombs triggered through physical attacks, they have learned that its endurance and ability to do so is limited.

Since Caesar and Castor both depended on brute force, Mitsuru was the one who handled the summoned shadows while the two guys focused on using their personas to inflict damage on the summoner.

As the explosions became weaker, Mitsuru assured them that the shadow’s endurance is near its limit and after another Spirit Drain, she instructed them to execute an all-out attack.

At the corner of his eye, Shinjiro even saw Aki smirked at him, and he knew full well what that meant.  They were about to wing this. What they didn’t anticipate was the instant that Castor missed to land a blow on the shadow, which in turn was able to gain momentum on the little time that it had and once again use its tricks.  That was when everything went downshit.

A couple of bad decisions and Akihiko attempting to use his persona to shield everything led them to this state minutes later, wherein Shinjiro was cursing under his breath and everything Mitsuru was saying at the moment sounded like self-righteous nags to him as he struggled to once again get back to the shadow.

“Shinjiro, you have to be careful!  Need I remind you that this shadow can manipulate minds?  Close combat is not advisable for—“ Mitsuru was reminding him from the sidelines, but Shinjiro tuned her out.

“I got this!” he shouted back, still trying to close the distance between him and the shadow, that was desperately trying to move around on a fast pace.

We almost did it. One last hit and it’s over.

“Use your Persona!”

“Dammit, Mitsuru!  Aki used his, look what that got him!”

Akihiko, pinned on the ground, visibly winced at what he said.  Mitsuru, on the other hand, was looking after him while trying to exterminate the lesser shadows summoned earlier.

‘trustmewecandothissummonme’

A static voice rang in his head, but Shinjiro ignored it.  Bet the guy’s just itchin’ to hit something again.

‘listencanfeelittrustme’

Shut up, Castor!  You missed earlier already! Don’t mess up now!

Shinjiro kept on following the shadow no matter where it went, not letting it escape from his sight and reach.

“Shinji, don’t let it buy time!”

I know, dammit!

Finally cornering the shadow on an alley, Shinjiro couldn’t hide his smirk as he lifted his axe, preparing to give the last blow, until he felt a pang on his back. As he peered behind him, the last image he saw was a woman with dead eyes, holding up a shard at him, and then his vision went blank.

The searing pain on his back was now replaced by the screeching in his head. Anguish, desperation, fear – several emotions rushed through Shinji, which was severely amplified by the panicked buzzing in his head.  Shouting, calling his teammates and asking for help, probably rolling on the ground – he tried everything, but not even clawing his head or trying to rip it off from his body was able to stop the pain that he was feeling.  The torture seemed to drag on for far too long that even Shinjiro wished for the shadow to just slash him dead already.

After what felt like hours before the pain dissipated and his breathing returned to normal, Shinjiro’s sight finally returned, but the destruction he saw made him wish it never did.

His teammates—his friends, were now lying on the ground, beaten and defenseless, all the while looking at him with desperate concern on their eyes. Shinjiro ran to them as fast as he could, but stopped on his tracks the moment he spotted on the corner of his eyes what he dreaded the most.

The vision that night ended just like how it all began.

Another lifeless body was right in front of him, but this time, it was all Shinji’s fault.

…

This time, as he was dragged back to the blank room, he was again crying nonstop in front of the goddess, just like how he did years ago.

“You saw how it all happened, Shinji. Trust yourself, and trust in Castor.  I know you can do it, you just needed someone who’ll believe in you,” reaching out her hand to touch his cheeks, she looked at him in the eye, which made Shinji return in kind.

Why is it that whenever Shinjiro has a dream-induced breakdown, those striking eyes would always get to him? Damn, the goddess really had him whipped.

Shinjiro continued crying like a baby, until she hugged him in her arms saying, “It’s fine, I know you’ll be able to make it right this time.”

“Not gonna say ‘I’ now, would you?”

He felt her chuckle, which somehow lightened him up as well, “How about ‘we’?”

“Fair enough,” Shinjiro buried his face on her shoulder and placed an arm around her, which made the goddess hug him even tighter.

The moment he woke up, Shinjiro was filled with determination.  Maybe, just maybe, he’ll find a way through this. He went out of his room and ran straight to the lounge that morning, where he saw Mitsuru sitting on the couch. Shinjiro cleared his throat, running through his resolve a couple more times in his head before voicing it to their leader.

He approached her, and Mitsuru then looked up at him with questioning eyes.

“My left hand hurts. I’m gonna ditch the mission tonight, ‘kay?”

“…Shinjiro, you know that I am the student council president, right?”

“Yeah, so?”

“And you’re aware that the use of illegal drugs is prohibited in our school?”

“Wha—no! The hell? I just can’t go, okay?”

“Just what are you saying?”

“Oh… nothing.”

“That is highly suspicious, but I won’t ask you any further. I’ll… pretend this conversation never happened.”

Shinjiro thought of proceeding to plan B, but as he saw Miki snickering at the front desk, who obviously witnessed the exchange between the two, he decided to jump to plan C.

“Are you sure you want to spar with me?” wrapping his hand before putting on his boxing gloves, Akihiko asked him one last time.

It was already after school, and club activities have started. There was no reason for Shinjiro to back out of this.

“Dammit, told’ya that already.” Besides, that was the plan. Break a hand, hopefully the left one, and instantly have an excuse from tonight’s mission.

“Don’t you have club activities today, Shinji? Those pancakes ain’t gonna cook themselves, you know?”

“What, are you mocking me and my club?!”

“No, I just wanna eat something. Pancake sounds nice.”

Shinjiro tried to punch him, but since he was not yet wearing gloves at the moment, and Aki just swatted his hand with one, Shinji finally got what he asked for.

After all the trouble that he went to, Shinjiro still had to drag his ass to that night’s mission. Aki, Miki and Mitsuru were with him, and upon analyzing their surroundings and the shadow at hand, Mitsuru and Miki started strategizing.

Earlier that evening, when the alarm went off on the dorm and Ikutsuki-san has oriented them of the situation, Shinjiro was sure that he could stay out of it, but Mitsuru insisted that they needed more manpower and Shinjiro’s “injury” wasn’t enough to consider him as a liability to the team. Regrettably, Shinjiro could also swear that his actions earlier that morning made Mitsuru wary of him, as she evidently eyed him suspiciously the moment they all heard the alarm.

Focusing back to their mission, Shinjiro recalled the dream that he had and compared it to the situation at hand, noting what he must do to avoid the outcome. One, don’t be a dick. Two, Miki’s here, so they got higher odds of winning. Three, trust in Castor.

Easier said than done. Shinjiro became too conscious of his actions that he was only on defense the entire time.  His plan also backfired, as he couldn’t shift the weight of his axe from one hand to another like he normally do. And he knows he had to trust Castor, but would he really gamble it now? I mean, it all started when the guy missed a hit.

As Shinjiro was preoccupied, what got his attention back to reality was a scream that came from the sidelines. The horror flashed on his face as he remembered the woman whose death he had foreseen.  Turning to where it came from and seeing that what he heard earlier came from someone else entirely, however, didn’t cause him relief either.

The one who was struck this time was Miki, which finally snapped him to his senses. Enough is enough.

Shinjiro finally called out to Castor, and never before had he heard his persona clearer than this. The connection he sensed as he finally reached out to Castor was indescribable, as he felt replenished and the weight dragging him down disappeared.  This time, Shinjiro realized that he was not just commanding Castor to fight, he knew that they were protecting each other.

“You did it,” the goddess smiled brilliantly at him that Shinjiro couldn’t help but wonder, how could she possibly shine even more than she already does?

Smiling back, Shinjiro impulsively hugged her this time.

The shadow was defeated, Miki was fine, and so were the bystanders that they later found out to be mother and child. After all that happened, Shinji deeply wanted to thank the woman in front of him, his goddess, for guiding him and staying by his side.

The moment she hugged him back, Shinjiro admitted to himself that he was filled with contentment and bliss, and wished to stay that way with her. The urge to say so crossed his mind, but as he was about to open his lips, she spoke up.

“That was the last trigger. You can relax now.”

“What do you mean?”

“You’ve saved them, and you’re safe as well, as promised,” she chuckled.

“Heh, then nothing bad’s gonna happen now, right? We can relax now, yeah?”

Cupping his cheeks, she laid her forehead on his, “Yes, I assure you, everything will be fine. We’ve done everything we could, so if anything worse happens, it could be beyond our control, but please don’t give up, Shinji.”

All he did was nod.

“You’re the strongest, bravest person I ever met, I’m sure you can do that.”

Laughing, he replied, ”Don’t patronize me, and besides, you’re always there for me, right?”

There was a long pause before she said anything, which made Shinji lean back and look her in the eyes.

“Shinji,” sighing, she finally replied, “it was really great to be with you again.”

Shinjiro was surprised from what the goddess said, but he got startled even more when she suddenly kissed him on the forehead.  Dumbstruck, it took moments for Shinji to make up his mind and tried to reach out to kiss her, but before he did, he finally woke up.

Anxiety was all he felt the whole day, and if he could, Shinjiro was ready to pass out even in class, as he desperately wanted to see her again. So the second he stepped into the dorm, he went straight to his room and tried his best to catch his sleep.

As he started to dream, the precognitions continued, but the visions of her stopped.

Two years have passed, but he never saw her again, not even the place where he assumed she dwelled on and he had grown to call the blank room, though blank plane seemed more appropriate. Shinjiro knew that there was no way her memories would slip from his mind, but he figured, he just had to live with it, because life goes on, and the very core of what she imparted on him was to never give up.

Needless to say, Shinjiro focused on the Home Economics club, to the extent that he even encourages everyone to join cooking contests and initiate tours to further develop their knowledge in different cuisine.

Aki and Miki more or less figured out back then that he might have been heartbroken, and though he denies it, Miki insists on helping him find someone and dragged her sibling to tag along with it.

Miki kept on setting him up on dates, but later didn’t bother when Shinjiro insisted on his specifics and turned down every girl he had talked to. Shinji thought Miki finally gave up, but it turns out she just passed the baton to her brother in finding the woman suitable for Shinjiro. Thankfully, the only time he ever bothered Shinji was when he was on a one-week tour in another city and Aki suddenly called him out of the blue, only to talk about a promising new member.

What Shinjiro didn’t expect was that as he was still on the tour, one night, he finally saw her again, not on the blank plane, but on the dream that was supposed to happen the following day.

Akihiko called him out to the hospital, said he got injured from the last shadow operation. He was about ready to leave, when more visitors came in to Aki’s room, and the goddess, real and alive, was one of them.

The next day, Shinjiro rode the first train back to Tatsumi Port Island. On the ride home, he texted Miki.

‘is aki on a hospital right now?’

‘(O-o) no… y?’

‘please push him off the stairs for me, am on a train home’

Unfortunately, Miki didn’t follow suit.

Arriving back later that evening, Shinji was preparing to ask a favor from Aki, but as he opened the door to the dorm, he dropped all of his stuff, seeing the new SEES member at the lounge, staring back at him.

All she did was smile, and his step turned into a full-on run.

1I really have no idea how this thing works... This has been sitting on my laptop for months and I never really intended to post it, being the lurker that I am, buuuuut going 37 hrs without sleep and a dead-end thesis made this sound like a good idea. Welp.

[dontshootmespence]

Awestruck

A/N: A request from @peytonnation for a Spencer x Reader where he asks her to hang out with him at an aquarium because he knows she’s fascinated by marine life. During the day, he admits to her what she means to him. @coveofmemories

                                                              ----

“What’re you up to this weekend, kid?” Morgan asked from across the room. He’d invite him out with the rest of the team, but almost every week, Reid decided to go home and Reid. He was the definition of an introvert.

Still in a daze, his head snapped toward Morgan after he called for him the second time. “What’re you doing this weekend?”

“Nothing much. Probably just reading.” 

And there it was. He was so predictable. “Well, if you change your mind, Emily, JJ, Penelope, Hotch, Rossi and I are going to bar tomorrow night. Y/N, you coming?”

“I’m not sure,” you said, walking back to your desk to grab your things for the weekend. “I’ll text you and let you know.”

He gave you a look that said your loss and walked away, leaving you and Spencer alone in the bullpen. “I was actually thinking of going to that new aquarium that opened up a few months ago,” Spencer said without looking up from his desk. He was fiddling with his thumbs. It was like he’d been dying to say that he had other plans but he didn’t want to get talked into doing something else.

“Oh, I’ve been wanting to go there!” you cried. As a kid, you’d always loved marine life and had even thought of becoming a marine biologist. Eventually, you decided on law enforcement, but your love of marine life had never faded.

With a twitch of his head, he looked up, opening his mouth to speak and then hesitating. “You wanna come with me?” he asked.

“Yea,” you said with a smile. “I’d like that. When tomorrow? Noon?”

He nodded and walked with you to the elevator, eventually going your separate ways at the parking garage to grab your cars and head home. If you didn’t know any better, you’d think that Spencer had just asked you out on a date. He was blushing...wasn’t he?

                                                             ----

“We meeting there?” you asked, having called him that morning. You’d agreed on a time, but hadn’t actually said where you were meeting.

Spencer cleared his throat. “If you want, I could come pick you up. I heard the parking over there is horrible, so it doesn’t really make sense to take two cars.” 

“Cool, see you in 15?”

Not even 10 minutes later, Spencer was at your door, ready to go. When he looked at you in your dolphin shirt, which you’d picked out specifically for the occasion, he smiled that little smile he got when people told him he was cute and he didn’t know how to react. “So what are you looking forward to seeing the most?” he asked, driving the 20 minutes to the aquarium.

Hmmm....that was a good question. You’d always loved sharks and dolphins and sting rays, but recently, you’d become really fascinated by jellyfish. “I love dolphins, obviously,” you laughed, pointing at your shirt. “But I also like sharks and rays and jellyfish. I heard they have ones called moon jellys. I just like the sound of that.”

“Moon jelly or aurelia aurita feed on zooplankton mostly and the top part, the bell, can grow to be about 12 inches wide, or the size of a dinner plate. When deprived of food, they can shrink to one-tenth their size to save energy and will regrow when food is available. On top of that, their population used to be kept in check by predators like sea turtles, tuna, and sunfish, but because of the rise in water-based pollution, their predators are starting to die, so jellyfish populations are growing at an alarming rate.” As he rambled on about moon jellys while he drove, you smiled, turning in your seat to watch the expressions play across his face. You’d always thought Spencer was cute - had even thought about kissing him on more than one occasion, but there was something about his face when he spoke about something he knew a lot about (which was most things) that made you exceedingly happy. 

He got off the exit for the aquarium, which was the first time he’d seen your face on the ride there. “I’m rambling, aren’t I?” he asked, quickly stifling himself. “Sorry.”

“Don’t be sorry, Spence,” you laughed. “I love all this stuff. So by all means, ramble away.”

The corners of his lips turned up as he pulled into the parking lot. “Thanks,” he said softly. “It’s nice to not annoy someone with my ramblings.” 

It was a good thing he’d turned his head away from you to park the car, because your face dropped. He couldn’t help how excited he got about things, and although everyone on the team tended to be polite and hear him out, occasionally they’d make a comment. At the very least, he could tell that they didn’t want to listen but were just being polite. That was all well and good, but it was nice to have someone actually be interested in what you were saying. “Ready?” he asked. The sound of his voice brought you out of feeling bad for him. Today, you were going to let him tell you all about the exhibits you passed. He’d probably know more about them than the employees would anyway.

After you walked inside, you skipped toward the directory. You needed to figure out where to go first. “Blue blubber jellies,” you said. You imagined your wide eyes made you look like a crazy person. But saying blue blubber jellies was really fun. 

                                                            ----

She really was like a kid in a candy store in here. Spencer walked slowly behind Y/N as she looked from the floor to the ceiling and taking in everything the aquarium had to offer. “This is definitely the best aquarium in the area now,” she said, coming to stop in front of the jellyfish exhibit.

For a few moments, he just stared at her awe-struck face. The jellyfish in front of her actually went from white to light blue to dark purple in color despite their name. The reflection of color in her eyes did nothing to lessen how amazed she looked. If anything, they made her eyes sparkle even more than they did naturally. On the way in, he’d promised to tell her all about all of the creatures they’d pass during the day, but he found himself unable to speak. With all of the sea life around him, one would think he’d be fascinated, but he was more than content taking in the joy on her face.

                                                           ----

“Spence?” you said. He blinked, coming back to you after being in a far away land or something like that. “Tell me about these jellies.” Again, you turned to stare at the blobs of light. They were purple when you’d turned to grab Spencer’s attention, but now they were light blue. 

Spencer stuttered as he started, but as he got into telling you all about the jellyfish, he fell into a confident rhythm. “Well, just like the moon jellyfish, these guys feed on zooplankton. They do grow a little bigger. About 16 inches. And they’re found in the coastal waters of eastern and northern Australia. Fun fact,” he said, his fingers fidgeting at the speed of light, “In Asia, they are considered a delicacy, which is somewhat dangerous because if they aren’t prepared properly, they can be deadly. They’re very poisonous.”

After staring at the jellyfish for another 10 or 15 minutes, you began walking toward another area of the aquarium. At first you didn’t notice, but by the time you’d reached the bottlenose dolphins, you were leaning against his arm with your arm looped through his. “You want me to tell you about the dolphins, now?” he asked happily. He was really enjoying telling you all about these creatures.

“Can I tell you about the dolphins even though you probably know all about them already? Because I did a project on them when I was in elementary school and I was obsessed with them. I memorized everything I could.” Now you were rambling. 

“Sure. Go ahead.” He smirked. 

You turned toward the tank, your hands spread wide across the glass as you put your nose up to it to get the best look you could. “So, adult dolphins can get anywhere from 6-12 feet in length and weigh between 400 and 800 pounds. Males are slightly larger than females. Meh. They feed on fish, squid and crustaceans which can be found through cooperative hunting with other dolphins, feeding in association with fishing boats and even digging in the sand to uncover food.” Spencer had been so quiet you weren’t sure whether or not he was paying attention - but he was, he was staring right at you with a soft smile, so you kept going. “They are found in tropical and temperate waters all over the world, but unfortunately, because people suck and don’t recycle or anything, a lot of populations are being depleted. Thankfully, they aren’t endangered yet. But they could be soon, and that makes me so sad. I mean-” 

All of a sudden, you felt his lips on yours before he pulled away again. “I’m sorry,” he said, seeing the stunned look on your face. “I couldn’t help it.”

“You...like me?” you asked in amazement. You could feel your lips curling up into a smile. You’d never expected him to like you. He never really expressed an interest in anybody.

At your question, his own eyes mirrored your look of confusion. “Of course I do,” he said softly. “Why wouldn’t I? You’re smart, and pretty. Funny, and nice. And when it comes to certain things like this, you get like me. Plus, you always seem genuinely interested in what I have to say.” He trailed off, blushing at how much he was gushing over you. 

“Come here,” you said, taking him by the collar and pulling him into you. “Kiss me again.” As you closed your eyes, you felt the softness of his lips again. You could get used to this. “We should do more of this later when there aren’t so many kids around.” 

“Definitely.” His forehead rested against yours for a few moments before he suggested walking over to the giant pacific octopus tank.

You shuddered at the thought. “They’re so cool, but also really unsettling. Good thing I have someone here I can cling to.”

As you walked over, you felt him gather you to his side. You were sure the rest of the team was having a great time together, and maybe one day soon, you and Spencer would join them together, but for now, you were ecstatic you’d decided to ditch them.

[ladyofthecastleproject]

[Angel of Miracle] 304 - Get into ACTION!!

“It won’t?!” - The Chosen Children and the digimon exclaimed petrified, they didn’t know how to react to Dai saying that.

“No, because without Fiorella, Mimi-san’s self from this world, we cannot get the Core of Purity” - he explained - “I completely forgot I killed her back in time, when I got corrupted…!”

“It’s okay,” - Ken looked at at him - “I’m a murderer too. I killed innocent digimon when I was the Kaiser. I… I understand the pain.”

“We’re aware that this place lost its light and is now doomed by the darkness” - Miyako sighed - “Even with you saying it’s not possible to corrupt us…”

“Excuse me,” - Warlock coughed - “Whatever Lance said about the corruption on you six… Is not certain or true. We never had outsiders before, so we’re not sure what will happen to you.”

“N-now I’m panicked” - Wormmon hid behind Ken’s legs - “Kenchan, let’s go home!!”

“I thought--” - Dai babbled.

“You may be a great mastermind, Lance, but you lack knowledge” - Warlock started to close the manuscripts - “It was my duty to teach you wizardry so you could use it to fight Pandora and seal the darkness.”

“Wow, nice friend you got here, Lance” - Dai said sarcastically.

“If this girl who was Mimi-san’s counterpart is dead, what should we do?” - Hikari seemed concerned - “Aren’t we able to save Lia-san’s world?”

“No, we’re definitely saving this world!” - And here was the goggle boy working at full speed - “There must be some way that exist to make it work…!!”

“You lack knowledge, but you don’t lack willpower” - the mage smiled.

“Warlock, please look at your books and everywhere. Lia, go with Miyako and try to gather Helios and Jason, please. The rest help me to find Sora-san and Koushiro-san from this world.”

“Right!” - everyone replied.

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“Taichi? Taichi!” - Yamato kept asking but the other wasn’t answering anymore - “Did he hang up? No… I still hear their voices…”

Suddenly, the Chosen Child felt something around, but ignored it. No, he needs to talk to Taichi. He heard something ‘she’s gone’. He wasn’t sure what it meant so…

“Taichi! Are you still there?! What happened? Did Koushiro discover something new about the kids? TAICHI! ANSWER ME, YOU--”

“YAMATO-SAN~♥”

Some hands grabbed Yamato’s shoulders by his back and he screamed. That scream echoed for the entire place. When Yamato looked behind him, he saw…

“M-Mimi-chan?!”

“Hello, Yamato-san!” - She smirked - “Did I scare you? Hee hee!”

“I’m on the phone, and… What are you doing here?! Weren’t you--”

“I decided to come visit you eleven!” - she said with excitement - “Where’s the others? Are they doing a party? Didn’t Sora-san tell you I was coming to make a visit? Summer is the best way to have fun with friends, there’s the beach, camping, shopping, and the city too. But I was planning to make a party for the digimon too, maybe we should go to the Digital World and enjoy the day?”

“Mimi-chan, I… We…” - how to tell Mimi that they’re having a little issue regarding the younger ones? - “Let’s talk about it later. I’m trying to talk with Taichi. Something strange happened and he’s not responding me.”

“... What’s wrong?” - she dropped that smile.

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“We can use a gate to go back to Duskstella” – Lia said it to Miyako, as they were walking on the dirt road that leads to the village - “I remember there’s one in the shore.”

“I’m fascinated with this world, Lia-san” - Hawkmon commented - “I wonder how it was before the corruption.”

“It was a nice place” - she started talking about her childhood, before Lance opening Pandora’s box. Miyako was in silence, just watching her partner and Lia interacting lively.

Actually, Miyako was overthinking. Lia Duskstella looks like Hikari, has powers, she can do anything by herself. Why would Dai tell her to go with a person who she didn’t know that well?! Wouldn’t have been better to send Hikari, since they were together before?

“He’s still Daisuke, right?” - Miyako muttered to herself, a bit uncomfortable with the whole situation - “He… He won’t be like this forever, will he? Will he become this ‘past life’ now?”

“Miyako-san?” - Hawkmon gave her a worried gaze - “Are you okay?”

“I… I am…”

“You don’t seem fine to me” - Lia frowned - “Is there something bothering you?”

“I can’t tell them I’m afraid that Daisuke won’t be the same anymore”

“It’s everything perfectly fine!” - She grinned, and saluted - “Haha! Let’s go! Can I offer you a ride? Holsmon is the best horse you can find!”

“Though I’m not a horse...” - Hawkmon felt a sweatdrop running down his head.

“I appreciate your offer, lady Miyako” - Lia giggled.

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“How will we find Sora-san and Koushiro-san from this world?” - Takeru asked - “And is there any other way to use the spell without the Core of Purity?”

“We’re going to make it work. No matter what happens, we gonna make it work!” - Dai was focused and determined - “I have to fix my mistakes, I didn’t want to involve your all… This is my problem.”

“You’re our friend, Dai-san” - Iori responded - “We wouldn’t leave you behind!”

“You did a lot for us” - Ken put his hand on Dai’s shoulder - “You did a lot for me. I’m in debt with you, and this is my time to return the favor.”

“Maybe we should ask Warlock-san and the others” - Iori suggested - “They must know someone who looks like Koushiro-san and Sora-san.”

“But redheads are not uncommon here like in Japan, Iori” - Dai replied - “They can know a lot of people who look like them. It’s not like Helios and Taichi-san, who have that… big natural crown.”

“Crown...?” - Vee tilted his head.

“I meant the hair. It’s unique, it’s like Goku’s hairstyle.”

“Ah…”

“We don’t need go with appearance though” - Ken interrupted - “Warlock-san and I have a few things in common, and I believe Lia-san and Hikari-san have too. What if… We give them exact information about quirks and behaviors that might help with the description?”

“Ken, you’re definitely the boy genius…!”

“I… I prefer to not hear those words anymore. It makes me remind how arrogant and lonely I was...”

“I’m sorry…” - Dai bowed his head, which made the others a bit confused until they remembered that Daisuke wasn’t acting normally at all.

“Okay… this wasn’t Motomiya-kun but Lance-san, right?” - Ken blinked.

“A-anyway, let’s ask! We know a lot about Sora-san and Koushiro-san.”

 “A person who’s… curious?” - Flannery and Amis looked at each other - “There’s a bunch of people in this reign like this” - then they answered.

“He’s a redhead,” - Dai repeated - “always working hard, too curious… Saved our butts several times… Are you sure there’s no one like him in this kingdom?”

“I dunno anyone like this either” - Boniface responded. He was chained to the pillar of the castle, being watched by the wolf and the guardian - “H-hey, don’t you think they exaggerated a little… Why chaining me?!” - he was glancing at the five Chosen Child.

“Because you’re dangerous, inmate!” - Flannery gritted her teeth.

“Don’t you think they went too far?” - Ken whispered to Dai - “Since we captured him, his behavior and mood changed drastically.”

“I don’t trust him” - Dai looked away - “I don’t trust a blond guy like him.”

“Daisuke-kun!” - Hikari snorted.

“A-ah, I’m sorry-- I mean, I trust Takeru but not HIM. He tried to kill me! And you!”

“Warlock-san” - Iori was too busy seeing a few photos in the library. One of them caught the little kid’s attention - “This person looks like a friend of ours” - then he pointed at it - “Who’s he?”

“Who?” - the other Chosen frowned, then looked to the picture Iori was asking about - “Koushiro-san?!”

“Ah?” - Warlock stopped reading and adjusted his glasses, then he replied - “That’s my big brother, Diomedes. He’s the prince of Scientia Terra. Our family has this branch where a few of us are wizards… And some are devoted to the knowledge. Don’t you remember of him, Lance? You met him once.”

“Koushiro-san from this world is Warlock-san’s big brother?!” - Ken was completely lost.

“Did I?” - Dai blinked - “Oh wait… Hmm… Was that time you had to give me a name and you used ‘Dai’ because Lance Duskstella could’ve given you troubles to keep me in Scientia Terra? Ah yes, as far as I remember… He’s very Koushiro-ish.”

“Can we call him, Warlock-san?” - Hikari asked.

“We don’t talk that much… Like I said, he’s obsessed with learning about the world and how it works. I’m the one who decided to follow the wizardry path of our family. I meet him only when is needed, because I prefer to stay studying and learning spells.”

“This is an emergency!” - Dai said - “What if I go there? I can try to call him so he could come help us.”

“I’m…”

“If you don’t try, then our world will be forever doomed! And I didn’t get this second chance for nothing!”

“Fine…” - Warlock sighed - “You convinced me. I will call Diomedes, it won’t take that much time” - he left the Library. During that time, Ken decided to talk to Boniface again.

“You are not an enemy at all” - Ken began - “I can make them free you if you cooperate with us. Do we have a deal?”

“I’m not sure if I have other option” - Boniface sighed - “Sure, I will help. I’m willing to help to compensate for all the grief and sorrow I caused.”

“Why would he help us?” - Dai stopped behind Ken - “I don’t think he knows something--”

“You said a person named Sienna sent you to kill Lia-san” - Ken said seriously - “Could you describe her?”

“What do you plan to do, outsider?” - Boniface bit his lips.

“Sienna…” - Dai repeated - “You must be kidding…!! Sienna wouldn’t do that! She was like a big sister to me! She wouldn’t-- No she--”

“She never liked Lia Duskstella for all the suffering she caused to the country and especially for your death. I lived with her once Purezza got destroyed. Since we shared the same pain I… Promised to revenge her and Purezza.”

“... I’m sorry. This is all my fault. Because I opened the box and released this evil in this world…” - Dai clenched his fist again - “Sienna… I don’t have too many memories of her at the moment…”

“Okay,” - Ken interrupted him - “Could you please describe her?”

“She’s a brave woman who loves everyone and the life” - Boniface started to describe that ‘Sienna’ - “short red hair, a skin a bit tan, a lovely gaze…”

“Wow, his description is like Sora-san’s” - Hikari commented.

“SORA-SAN!” - Dai screamed - “The strange dreams…!! I’ve seen a woman who looked like Sora-san and she was with Taichi-san in a dream… I remember…!! Those were Sienna and Helios! It was a memory!”

“This means we discovered who has the Core of Love?” - Armadimon asked. “Most likely” – Tailmon commented. “So now we have to find her, right?” - Patamon questioned.

“Look, Sienna will kill Lia if you put them in the same place” - Boniface explained - “She hates her. For losing a fianceé, for losing Lance, for having her country ruled by a monster--”

“Lia is NOT a monster!” - Dai roared - “If you have someone to hate, put the blame on me! All those shouldn’t have happened if I hadn’t opened that box!”

“We can protect everyone from Sienna” - Amis pointed at him with his thumb - “We have another pair of chains too.”

“Chaining her won’t solve anything!!” - Boniface screamed.

“Can’t we tell her it’s not Lia-san’s fault at all?” - Takeru suggested - “B-But I don’t think Lance-san was the one to blame. The darkness used him as well.”

“I dunno how would Sienna react when she sees me” - Dai confessed - “She might… not believe me.”

“I’m sorry for the wait” - Warlock returned - “I contacted Diomedes, but he’s with king Helios at this moment.”

“... I will help you to find something about the spell” - Dai announced - “the others free Boniface and try to bring Sienna here.”

“I… want to stay” - Hikari looked down - “If Sienna-san hates Lia-san so much, she will mistake me with Lia-san.”

“Takeru cannot go either” - Dai added - “Maybe you two could go get Zuzen with Flannery. Ken, Amis and Boniface go get Sienna. Iori, Warlock and I stay here and keep looking for another way to complete the enchant.”

“Right…!!” - they all agreed.

“Daisuke-san is acting like a true leader” - Iori smiled.

“Lance was a natural leader as well,” - commented Warlock - “I assume sir Daisuke is the leader in your group?”

“Most likely” - he responded - “Taichi-san and him lead the group, without them we could’ve been lost.”

[kaedekisaragi]

Kaede Kisaragi Watches The Flash S3E21 - Cause and Effect

Flash of Two Lives

Barry says Savitar is a time remnant of himself. Savitar exposits how, last year, to defeat Zoom, Barry sacrificed a time remnant to save the multiverse, while he went on with his merry life. But when Barry made Flashpoint, it changed everything. Future Barry created several remnants to stop Savitar, all remnants got killed... Except Savitar himself. And then, a funny thing happened: everyone, including Barry himself, shunned the remnant for not being the real barry allen. Just an Aberration. Future Barry didn't tell this to Barry. Savitar was broken, wanted the pain to end... And Gods feel no pain, so he had to become a God. All he has to do is kill Iris so Barry is forced into darkness and permits Savitar's birth... But the second thing he needs, he's gonna keep secret (I know, shocker, Barry Allen keeping secrets). BARRY ASKS WHAT HAPPENS IF HE SUICIDES, VIBRATING HIS HAND! Savitar reminds him how cause and effect (HA! HE SAID IT!) didn't work so good for Eddie. The more one time travels, the less its rules apply to you. Savitar says it will be Barry who is forgotten.

Then Barry uppercuts him and prepares to kill Savitar himself.

Then Savitar's armor smacks Barry away, being a cooler suit than his. The two face off, in their respective suits, using speed lightning, causing a massive explosion. Savitar escapes.

The team reacts shocked to the reveal. Cisco takes in all the info and manages to understand it, despite being appalled that HR didn't have Star Trek TOS but Voyager in his Earth. He rushes to the glass pane and proceeds to do a classic expository explanation:

-4 years from now, future Flash creates Time Remnant to fight Savitar. -Savitar lets that one live so IT can become Savitar. -Savitar is imprisoned in the Speed Force. -Remnant goes crazy, travels in time to the past, becomes Savitar. -Remnant creates the lie that he was the first speedster, spreading the myth and gathering acolytes.

This doesn't explain who came first, Remnant or Savitar. Because it is a closed loop. No beginning, no end. Predestination Paradox. Savitar exists because he's fated to exist by creating his own existence despite never originally having existed. Wally points out that a Remnant of Barry shouldn't want to kill Iris, but Barry has no answer to that.

Iris and Barry talk about Savitar. Finding out the monster isn't a monster isn't fun. Part of him was still Barry. The pain inside Savitar, Barry felt it when his parents died, how he wished he could be violent as they were to his parents. He knows he can be as evil as Savitar. Because he too lost someone. Iris reassures him he'll beat Savitar, reminding Barry that Savitar (and Barry) is not a god. Barry reflects that being a god is possible, when bad outweighs the good. It's not about being possible to do it, but about whether they should do it. What will he need to be to stop Savitar?

Cisco runs in with an awesome/worst idea. He wants to stop Barry from being able to remember what they're doing now by messing with his brain. To stop him from retaining new info, so Savitar can't learn what they're doing... Why do I feel this is why future Barry doesn't know who Savitar is? Barry agrees to it.

AND THEN THEY PROCEED TO GIVE BARRY AMNESIA! DAMN IT CISCO! THIS IS WHY CAITLIN WAS THE BRAIN SURGEON!

Amnesiac Barry is a bit hillarious, finding his official name (Bartholomew Henry Allen) kinda bad, and wondering if his name shouldn't be Bart (next season, man, next season) and being completely and realistically hysterical that they might be trying to steal his kidneys. Iris shows him photos of them. He doesn't even remember he is engaged to Iris. AND THEY ALSO MADE HIM FORGET HE HAS SUPERSPEED! And then Cecile calls, needing Barry at CCPD. AND WHY THE FUCK DID IRIS TELL JULIAN TO STAY?!? JULIAN WAS A FORENSIC GUY, HE SHOULD BE THERE IN BARRY'S PLACE!!!

HR, back to flirting with Tracy, sees she's having problems making the Speed Force Bazooka (awesome name) work. He tells her to stop being so obsessed with what's not working, and to step back to try and figure it out from a broader point of view. AND OMG, THESE TWO DORKS ARE PERFECT FOR EACH OTHER, THEY ARE BOTH OBSESSED WITH COFFEE! AND THEY ALMOST GO FOR IT, BUT THEY BOTH STEP BACK LMAO

So, the emergency on CCPD: Lucius Coolidge, the Heat Monger, worst arsonist since Mick Rory went AWOL. And since his hearing is today, Barry needs to testify since he was the CSI on the case, to hold Coolidge for trial. BRUTAL DAMN LIFE WON'T LET YOU GET AWAY WITH A LITTLE AMNESIA! Cecile is livid that they did this NOW of all times, and tells them to hurry up, or else Heat Monger will be walking free. Barry can only cutely apologize, despite not having a clue why he feels this is his fault. And he warmly asks whether they've been busy planning the wedding, to Iris' utter heartbreak on realizing all the things they have not done.

Elsewhere, Savitar listens to Frost rambling about her problems with their plan... Only to choke her and ask her who is he... Ooooookay, interesting side effect. At least it worked?

Barry was in the anime club, he loved Dragon Ball Z. Badass. He and Iris are at Jitters and he's looking himself over on his mobile. The two laugh about how horribly nerdy he used to look and how clearly Iris never tried to help hard enough XD Iris is feeling amazed at how... light Barry is now. No worries. No burdens. No brooding. He's happy. And why wouldn't he be... He'll be with her forever, right? Iris is not amazed now. Barry leaves for the courthouse... WHY?!? HE STILL HAS NO MEMORY!!!

At the courthouse... Barry is  called to testify, but Cisco gives him glasses to wear... Why? Also, quirky music. This will be good. They are TYPING HIS ANSWERS ON THE GLASSES. GOOGLE GLASS. AND JULIAN IS MAKING HIM SAY SHIT. AND USING SMILIES. THIS IS A MASSIVE HILLARIOUS DISASTER OF A TRAINWRECK.

The testimony, despite stumbles, seems okay... But Barry is heating up something fierce. And it burns up so much he fizzles out the google glass. I can't even look. The case is dismissed. Heat Monger is walking free.

AND THEN FROST SHOWS UP ON THE LAB. AND WALLY LOST HIS SPEED! AND SHE DEMANDS THEM DO EVERYTHING SHE SAYS.

...fuck me... Of course. They made Barry forget everything. This means Savitar never remembered his plans. Which means he also didn't make Wally into a speedster. Cause and Effect. Time rules affect speedsters in all stupid ways.

Iris is glad at least Barry has the same 'wanna help' attitude without memories. He cannot see it in himself as being able to afford their big apartment or that he did the decorating. Also, he doesn't remember his parents :( Iris lies to him, saying they died peacefully. She comments how when they first met, he was the happiest boy ever. He says it might be because she entered his life, and they kiss. The kiss triggers his superspeed, and terrifies him.

Barry is psyched, actually, about having powers. At the lab, they find Frost, and Barry is dismissed (not before asking gleefully about Frost being a super villain). Frost tells them if she helps them fix Barry, all goes back to normal... But Iris says they could just re-teach barry everything. Frost claims this might be good... But currently, there's lots of villains and no flashes. Is it worth the risk?

HR and Tracy continue trying to fight their lustful desire for each other. They lose. Hard. They kiss. The kiss somehow makes her have an epiphany for her project.

Frost tries to act all serious and focused on her task, and Cisco casually talks about the past with Julian, clearly trying to make Caitlin return by talking on how they were three musketeers with Ronnie under Wells. He even casually namedrops Hartley (and how Julian was Hartley 2.0). And Frost remembers their funny stories about Ronnie. It gives her pause. She is clearly reluctant.

Joe and Iris bask on happy Barry running for funsies. Joe realizes he hasn't seen him this happy in ages... Or ever. The burdens of his past always weighing him down. He realizes Iris doesn't want him to remember everything. Joe reminds her that, without 28 years of experiences (OMG I HAVE BARRY'S AGE!), he isn't the same man she fell in love with. She can't help but wonder if maybe the city doesn't need the Flash...

Then Heat Monger uses a flamethrower. Damn it. Barry, even without any idea how to use his powers, puts on the suit and goes, for he needs to help. But he can barely even stop himself, how can he even rescue a whole building full of people? Frost wants them to use their plan: electroshocking his brain from the suit's sensors. Cisco activates the device, shocking Barry hard. It doesn't work. They need to kickstart his brain with a visceral memory... Iris knows what to do. She tells him how his mom was murdered. How he came to her house and was just shocked, not crying. And then she woke late at night and found him sitting and crying alone. And she sat there, letting him cry in her lap. That was the night they fell in love, realized how much they needed each other. She wanted to take it away, but she can't. And for every bad memory, he has a good memory to get him through the suffering...

Barry remembers everything. Savitar too.

Flash and Kid Flash put out the fire together. Heat Monger is caught. At the labs, Barry remembers all the nerdy tidbits, and also that he named his class hamster Alexander Ham Bell. Frost tries to leave, but the team try to persuade her to stay. Julian swears he'll try harder, no matter what, to fix her. AND HE SAYS THE L-WORD. But Frost says she never loved any of them. But as she leaves in the elevator, her eyes fizzle out briefly. She's fighting.

Barry wonders if Iris really wants him with his baggage. Barry comments how he had the chance to be free when he made Flashpoint. But he needs the pain to not forget who he really is. Iris is glad her Barry is back. They kiss. HR walks in. Tracy finished the Bazooka... But she needs 3.86 Terajoules of energy.

3.86 TERAJOULES?!? THAT'S MORE THAN THE SUN!!! WHERE ARE THEY EVEN GONNA FIND THAT?!?

Elsewhere. Red glowy rock. Big room... King Shark.

This episode was a classic character study. What is Barry Allen? Who is he as a person? Would you recognize him if I pulled his dark suffering away? Would you like him if he wasn't an experienced superhero? Would he be the same person? Well, the episode proved that, despite the excess suffering on future Barry or the lack of suffering of amnesia Barry, Barry Allen will always be a person who helps. That is what makes him a hero, not his powers, not his suffering. This was Iris' Flashpoint, the idea of letting him remain amnesiac was her last temptation. But like Joe, she too had to embrace the fact this is their 'normal', and she wouldn't have loved Barry better if he was a different person than the one she fell in love with. If anything, this episode gave Barry some good weightless fun to chill out before the big confrontation with Savitar. Likewise, Caitlin's showing more and more signs to still be inside of Killer Frost, and the chances are high she will keep on fighting harder from now on after Cisco's stellar work using their good times to remind her why they were friends.

Two episodes left!