#stupid arabella

[bluetights2]

A bit of a salve I have written to soothe our broken hearts over William's departure.....

[james-preble]

something im unsure if i understood in strawberry mansion

preble is supposed to be bella's second husband right?? doesnt she say like "my second husbamd was a dream" or wtv???

[dremieblur]

[blinkbones]

I love The Female Quixote because there's about a gajillion lines that, on their own, sound fantastic, like,

"Love is ingenious in Artifices"

but then you put it back into its context and it's just Arabella being colossally wrong about what's happening around her 😭

[pluralwizard]

the absolute best characters are always hyper-competent dumbasses

just absurdly skilled in some form and yet put them in a situation they aren’t ready for and suddenly they don’t have two braincells to rub together

[three-bunnies-in-a-trenchcoat]

WHY WOULD YOU DO THAT TO HER?

[oflolth]

genuinely though why do his eyes glow

[gay-dorito-dust]

May I request BootHill and Argenti with a crush who’s reckless and accidentally confessed due to a particularly bad injury?

Crush doesn’t care for getting injured at all and always brushes off their concerns when they get injured but one day they just get rlly badly hurt and when they try to do the usual

“I’m okay”

It just kinda snaps in the boys?

(Sorry if this is too much)

Boothill

‘You fudging idiot!’ Boothill screamed when he saw the massive gash on your side. ‘You’ve gone and gotten yourself hurt again!’

‘I’m okay.’ You said as casually as you could while trying not to wince as Boothill began to put pressure on your wound to prevent it from bleeding out further. The gash fucking killed but you weren’t about to let him know how much it hurt, you refused to as you’ve dealt with far worse.

You haven’t, actually, that was a fucking lie to begin with.

‘I’m okay’ they say.’ Boothill scoffs, ‘yeah right, you’ve only gone and done it now! For fork’s sake would it kill you to actually act like you want to fudging live for once?!’

He knew you were a reckless spirit for the moment you first met, you were someone who didn’t care how many scars would litter your skin, only caring about finishing the mission no matter how debilitating the pain was. At first he didn’t care to know your name nor your reasoning as to why you act the way you did, but when he started to feel something for you, that’s when he began to worry himself sick over you.

Boothill genuinely wondered whether or not you cared that you lived after each and every suicide mission, you couldn’t be mended or rebuilt like he could, you weren’t invincible as you’d like to this you were and Boothill could only hope that today served as a reminder of that.

Boothill didn’t want to lose you, he couldn’t bare it as he’s already lost his friends, family and his darling Arabella who’s smile so wide you could see the her gap tooth on full display. Arabella was just learning to walk when she was taken from him along with everyone else who meant everything to him; Revenge was his only motive and loosing you would only make him surrender to it a hell of lot faster.

‘If all you’re going to do is shout about how stupid I am then you can fuck off and leave me here to die since I’m such a idiot in your eyes, mr spaghetti western.’ You barked, hating Boothill’s unnecessary comments and hating the worried look within his eyes even more, it made you feel useless and pathetic.

Boothill looked at you as though you’ve grown a second head, lost on how that was the conclusion you came to, you must be delirious from the blood loss. ‘Fork me do I have to spell it out for you- I like you fudging dummy!’ He exclaimed. ‘I’m mad not because I hate you but because you’re hurt and I’m scared of loosing you darling!’ He chuckled humourlessly as he presses his forehead against yours, the one time where he was glad that his face was the last places where he could feel your warmth seep into him. ‘Your recklessness has me on the edge of insanity more than once sweetheart. I mean do you know just how much it hurt to see you like this? I might as well have gone on a tirade and hunt down every son of a nice lady who played a part in your scars.’

You remained in stunned silence.

This confession wasn’t something you were expecting from someone like Boothill, it made you wonder whether you were imaging this for yourself, and the reality was that he wasn’t actually here with you and you were indeed dying alone with no one to provide you company other then dead corpses waiting for you to join them. So in hopes of proving yourself wrong, you lifted a hand to his cheek, watched as he melted against it, his warmth seeping into your skin.

He was here.

Boothill was here and this was real, all this was real.

‘I like you too your silly cowboy.’ You whispered before pressing a tender kiss to his plush lips. A battlefield wasn’t a great place for a confession nor for love to blossom but if that was the case then why did it feel so right for the both of you in that moment.

Later you were taken to medical and Boothill, your official partner, went back to talking your ear off about how reckless you were, but would press kisses to your forehead and hands to let you know that he’ll take care of you from now on.

Argenti hated it whenever you came back from missions injured and your carelessness towards the scrapes and bruises that littered your body didn’t exactly help either.

‘I’m fine.’ You said after spraining an ankle.

‘I’ll live.’ You waved him off dismissively after hurting your side during a mission.

It seemed as though you never held yourself in the same regard as he did, and Argenti couldn’t help but feel his heart break the more and more he witness you disregard other people’s concern, acting though you had a paper cut rather then a wound that wound take you out of action for a good couple of weeks.

So when he found you with your back pressed up against a wall and a deep gash on your leg that made it hard for you to stand never less walk.

‘My beloved rose!’ He cried as he rushed to your side, setting aside his weapon as he inspected the wound.

‘I’m okay, it’s only a small gash.’ You told him but Argenti wasn’t about to hear it, not this time. He wasn’t going to allow you the chance to dismiss him when you were severely injured. So when he levelled you with a stare, you began to wish you could take back your words as seeing such a stern expression on a man as beautiful as Argenti was actually downright terrifying. ‘This is vastly different than a small gash, this is a serious injury that could alter your life’s trajectory for good if we treat it with such disregard as you have done with previous injuries.’ He told you with a seriousness that had you listen to him.

‘And why do you care?’ You asked.

‘I’ve always cared.’ Argenti replied straightforward, ‘every injury I’ve cared. I worried for your health, your well-being, both physical and mental, but you don’t seem to do the same and that pains me because you are so-‘

‘-reckless?’ You cut in, having heard the same thing from pretty much everyone and believing Argenti would be no different from them.

‘-beautiful.’ Argenti said and your breath caught in your throat. ‘You are so beautiful to me, my rose. I have found myself grown quite fond of you in a short amount of time that any pain caused to you might as well be my own.’ He finished as he saw the conflicting emotions within your eyes and prays that you could find the truth within his words.

‘Why?’ You asked. ‘What would a knight of beauty want with a reckless idiot like me?’

Argenti smiled softly. ‘You may be reckless but you are far from an idiot my dear, I like you a lot and I merely say this in fear of a future where I may never get the chance to do so for multiple reasons. Whether or not you accept is solely up to you.’ Argenti felt as though he had finally gotten a heavy weight off of his chest, but felt a pinch of anxiety when you didn’t respond after a period of time, and began to wonder whether this was a smart move on his behalf.

‘I always dreamed of having a knight in shining armour.’ You admitted, raising a hand to cup the back of his head. ‘But I didn’t think that dream would come true until you came along and I knew in that moment I would give you my heart and so much more.’ Argenti breathes a sigh of relief as he rests his forehead against your own, nuzzling your noses together briefly. ‘I’d be more than honoured of being your knight, if you’ll let me.’

You chuckled as you looked at him fondly. ‘I’d be more than happy to my cherry haired beauty.’ You replied as Argenti was quick to scoop you in his arms and carried you to the medics, who told you that you’d be out of action for quite a while and Argenti was more then happy to be your caregiver during that time, you couldn’t be more happier at the opportunity of being with your knight in shining armour.

[wellen-katze]

Masterpost for all my BG3 fanart

You are probably here for it so here is a list of all the Baldur's Gate 3 Fanart I did so far, please enjoy! whew, that was a lot of work

Comics:(last update 19/04/24)

The circle of degradation - bg3 comic astarion, cazador

Weeping of a bhaalspawn - bg3 comic original Dark Urge Tav

astarion dialogue spoilers

Compassion - bg3 durgeTav, Astarion comic

A fun show - bg3 Astarion comic

Why not - bg3 Astarion, Tav comic

Lae'zel, Voss comicstrip

Needle and thread - bg3 comic Astarion, Halsin [TW SA themed]

the funniest pictures are created(...) - bg3 Astarion, Karlach, Wyll, Shadowheart, Gale, Lae'zel

Moon and stars - bg3 Astarion comic

Farewell of a wizard - bg3 Rolan (Gale) comic

Don't you fret - bg3 comic A.Astarion/dark urge

Hope is for the living - bg3 astarion comic (remake)

Words to care - bg3 comic, Astarion

Lae'zel the artist(?) - Astarion, Gale, Shadowheart, Wyll, Karlach

Filth - bg3 comic, a.astarion, dark urge

Pondering and caring - bg3 comic, astarion

Love of my life -bg3 comic, astarion

Ascended Minds - bg3 comic, Dark Urge x A.Astarion

How it might have started Tav, Jaheira, Astarion, Shadowheart, Gale

Pondering and hatching - bg3 comic Lae'zel , Karlach, Astarion

It's raining - bg3 comic, Gale, Astarion

Far away - Astarion, Gale, Shadowheart

Halsin and ducks

Calamari - BG3 comic, Astarion, Gale

Temptation - BG3 comic, Astarion, Tav 'Yaris'(by Iruka/Sabu)

Bookclub part 3 - Astarion, Gale, Volo

Yellow flower - A.Astarion

Arrow - Astarion, Durge Tav ,Gale Karlach

The past of a magistrate - astarion, durge, wyll, shadowheart, karlach, gale

Taters! -bg3 Karlach PART 1, PART 2, PART 3

Bookclub-time with Gale,&Astarion

The golden hour - bg3 Cazador, Astarion comic

I love you - , astarion,tav

A faint whiff - astarion,tav [tw trauma]

bg3 doodle comic about stupid Tav things2

bg3 doodle comic about stupid Tav things

Family runs through the magic - bg3 rolan,cal,lia comic

Death, life and fun -Astarion, Arabella, Withers, Gale PART1 , PART2 , PART3

Cold skin, colder heart - astarion bg3 doodle comic

The office meme, Astarion, Tav

Not the religious type - bg3 astarion comic

The meaning of Gale of Waterdeep, Tara, Gale

Curse of a vampyr - bg3 a.astarion, tav comic

AstarionxDragonborn Dark Urge lap scene

Path down to the heart - BG3 Dark Urge, Astarion comic [TW blood, violence]

The freedom to love - Astarion,durgeTav bg3 comic

No one is allowed to eat from Tav's buffet lol - bg3 shortcomic

Circular scars - Cazador, Vellioth BG3 comic [TW violence, blood]

Nibbles - bg3 comic [Shadowheart origin spoiler]

The library of a million realms - bg3, Astarion comic [TW trauma]

The fortuneteller - Astarion, Tav

The worst podcast - bg3 comic [epilogue spoilers]

God Gale as a motivational coach and his guest Astarion

POV you are having a very romantic date with Astarion lol - bg3 comic

Durge, Astarion and a bhaalist worshipper, bg3 shortcomic

Dark Urge&A.Astarion PART 1 , PART 2 , PART 3 , PART 4, PART 5

Gale's burden - bg3 shortcomic

Bloodtalk -Astarion, Dark Urge,

Gale, Tara and Catstarion

The box - Astarion,Tav bg3 Comic [TW Trauma]

Astarion&Shadowheart, scars, river and talk

Gale and Astarion's Bookclub

Lae'zel is not smiling, you are smiling! -Karlach, Lae'zel, Tav

Bg3 Clown comic - Tav, Astarion, Shadowheart

Gale meets the kids - Gale, Tav, Shadowheart, Astarion

Astarion and the Gur scribble

Gale and his children

Astarion short comic [TW sa themed]

A short Shadowheart comic

Old Astarion comic - Cazador, Astarion

Ravishing Mirror - S.AstarionxA.Astarion R18! (Patreon shop)

Other:(last update 19/04/24)

kisses and hugs for gnome tav, Karlach, Astarion doodle

Shadowheart, nocturne FA

Astarion confession scene, break-up FA

Astarion face doodles

Astarion with child doodle

minthara doodle

A moment of disgust, Astarion FA

7000 pieces, Astarion FA

Gale doodle

Astarion FA

Tav Meme

Midnight chimes, eh? Astarion FA

Astarion Fa

Astarion Fa

Gale would still marry you, if you were a worm

Gale and Tara weee

Catstarion has nine lives

Very serious first 1000 words

let me know if there are any mistakes

[muchosbesitos]

Hi, would you be interested in writing a fic with Miguel and reader who doesn’t want to have kids? It’s ok if not 💖☺️

don’t let me go

pairing: miguel o’hara x fem reader

contents: brief mention of sex, mostly just fluff

author’s note: sorry if you wanted more smut 😭

word count: 1051

The discussion of having kids was a topic that you tried your best to avoid with Miguel since seeing how much longing he had towards having a kid made you feel guilty for not wanting the same thing with him. While most people drooled over the sight of your boyfriend having a child in his arms as he played with it, you didn't feel the same effects as they did. Comments of how good he'd be as a father, of how kind and protective he would be, along with comments critiquing you for not giving him a child yet circulated around constantly.

As much as you tried to avoid the subject, you could tell that you couldn't dance around it for much longer. The way that Miguel stared at your belly after he pumped you full of his cum, a part of him wishing that your birth control would fail and that his sperm would take. You'd be lying if you said that you hadn't thought about it just for his sake, but the concept of bringing a child into the world didn't illuminate your life as it did with others.

A loud banging on your door woke you up, sunlight barely starting to peek through the curtains when you got up. You let out a small groan as you trudged over to the door, being met with your sibling holding their baby in hand. "Hey, sorry that I'm bothering you this early but I was wondering if you'd watch Arabella. Her babysitter cancelled last minute and I don't have anywhere else to take her," they said, desperation evident in their eyes. Normally, you'd be willing to do anything for them but you were certain the baby had a vendetta against you.

"She doesn't like me, she doesn't stop crying after you leave her with me," you responded, a brief memory of the last time you babysat running through your head. "She was teething that time. Please? It's the last time I'll ask for a while, I swear," they answered and you decided to grab the baby from them, cradling it to the best of your ability. "Thank you, you're the best!"

You looked down at the sleeping baby before wrapping her up in a makeshift blanket burrito on the floor. You figured that you'd distract her from her parent's absence when she woke up, find something stupid for the two of you to do. But for now, you enjoyed the silence of the apartment and decided to watch some tv in order to pass the time.

A couple hours had passed and the baby had gotten up from her nap, tears rolling down her chubby cheeks as she wailed. You were in the process of trying to feed her some purée with peas in it, most of them ending up tossed in your hair or face. "Come on, what do you want from me? I changed you and I'm feeding you," you grumbled, looking over at the baby as you tried to get her to swallow the little bit on the spoon.

"Maybe you should try rocking her," you heard from behind you, seeing your boyfriend walk into the shared apartment. "You're home early," you noted, looking up for a moment before you felt the peas fling in your hair. "Could hear the wailing from HQ," he responded, picking up the baby as he cradled her in his arms. He comforted Arabella as he held her, rocking her back and forth as her tears faded away.

The three of you were sitting down on the couch watching cartoons while you waited for your sibling to get off from work, your head resting on Miguel's shoulder. He held the baby up in his lap, her eyes twinkling with excitement at the dogs showing up on the screen. You'd washed up the peas from your hair and now you were pretending to be asleep, just to avoid the conversation of having a baby as long as you could.

You eventually did fall asleep and when you woke up, the baby was gone and Miguel's hand was rubbing small circles on your thigh. "Hola bella durmiente. how was your nap?" he asked, looking over at you with a lazy smile. (hi, sleeping beauty) "It was good, how was work?" You responded, the two of you getting into an easy conversation after that. He divulged about the anomalies he had to capture today and you divulged on the stinky diaper you had to change today.

"I've been thinking about starting our own little family, actually. Seeing you with Arabella just made me realize that I think I'd like to pursue that with you, even if you don't think you'd be ready," he said after a while, your lips pursing a bit as you looked over at him. "Miguel, I need you to understand something before I tell you this. This isn't about you or my perception of you, okay?" You inquired, waiting for his approval to continue.

"I have no doubt about your fathership abilities but I just.. don't think a child would make me feel fulfilled. Trust me when I tell you that you're person I would imagine having a family with and i thought about doing that, just to see you smile the way you whenever you hold a baby. But the whole idea just doesn't make me happy or makes me thrilled," you told him, expecting him to try to change your mind or ask you if you didn't think he was good enough.

But he simply pulled you into a hug, comforting you with his embrace as he held you tightly. "I'm sorry if I made you feel like I was expecting that out of you. While the idea of a child does excite me, you're much more important than that idea. And I'm sorry that I made you feel like you couldn't share this with me," he told you, his hand running down your back.

"And you're okay with not having a child?" You asked him, a bit surprised that he seemed to be taking this so well.

"Yeah, we can just fill up the house with cats or dogs, even geese if that's what you want. You're too important to me to get hung up over an idea."

[thealogie]

Although he was not bitchy as Michael, David wasn’t the model roommate either, although in a more absent-minded and eccentric way (http://www.david-tennant.co.uk/2002/01/interview-how-we-met-arabella-weir-and.html)

There were a few teething problems. He's not at all tidy and I'm very tidy. I'm kind of, "You're cutting the garlic with the wrong knife and don't ever cut the plastic with that Sabatier." He's kind of, "Don't stir that pasta sauce with the spoon you've just licked." I'm more, "Don't be stupid, you kiss people you barely know."

He thinks I'm finicky, but he has to have his kiwi and his bowl of cereal in the morning. And he drove me nuts with his washing, which he'd leave in the machine for about a year. Also, I could never get him to believe that no matter how he shut the front door, to anybody inside the house it was a slam, although once Jeremy and I had babies he did get better.

Dude ok nevermind. Perhaps they are the same person except DT is very sorry and trying his best and MS is like whatever I’m Michael Sheen

[thedoewitch]

THE TRUTH ABOUT HARRY POTTER CHARACTERS

In the last few weeks, I've seen many arguments between the stans of different characters in the HP Fandom. And this, this exact post is about my opinion, mixed with canon (books) and how they normally should have been perceived.

This is part one of the series explaining the characters in the Harry Potter Universe. It will be long, seeing as many are hateful towards characters who did nothing wrong, or love them for all the wrong reasons.

Two big arguments will be explained in this post. Two biggest arguments about Anti-Character vs Pro-Character.

Anti-Dumbledore vs Pro-Dumbledore;

Now, there are many people who are on the anti-Dumbledore side of the fandom, and I can understand why. It is not a surprise, considering what has been done by Dumbledore in the series.

However, Albus is one of the many-layered characters. He was a Blood Supremacist throughout his life, even as an adult, until his sister Ariana Dumbledore died.

He is, like many others, a flawed character, just like us real humans are. He was in love with Gellert Grindelwald (Which he has no fault in, you cannıot control who you fall in love with), and was willing to take the world under their control just because Gellert wanted to.

In the Marauders and Lightening Era timeline, he did many horrible things. He went as far as using Fudge to gain things to his favor, he used Severus and Harry, and even Remus and Sirius and Rubeus (Hagrid) as the events unfolded, and he even neglected other students while trying to control everything that he can, even though he is a HEADMASTER, a person who s supposed to keep the school's students safe. And the fact that he left Harry in the Dursleys' footsteps and not checking on him properly was disturbing, no matter if Arabella Figgs was there. He didn't care to check up properly.

He did all of that, yes. There is no arguing about it, it is in The Fantastic Beast, in the Harry Potter books, in the Secrets of Dumbledore, in the Crimes of Grindelwald. He did all of those things that nowadays seem impossible to do.

But- He also did good things. He accepted Remus into the school, albeit it was stupid of him to do so with only a place he can transform that he can break free easily if not strictly controlled. He accepted him because he wanted people like him to have a chance.

We even see another werewolf student in the game called Hogwarts Mystery, which I liked and enjoyed. He is not prejudiced against them, and it makes their life easier.

He gave Harry and other students support throughout their life at Hogwarts. It excluded Slytherins, sadly, but he did try to be a good role model and also tried to relieve the students from stress by doing things like canceling the exams and even saying seemingly ridiculous words during the meals. He was truly afraid that Ginny was taken into the chamber, it is obvious in the CoS book when Lucius paid a visit to Albus.

He supported the adults like Alastor and Kingsley and Tonks, warned Sirius and the like against doing things that could be dangerous for their lives. He did care about them. Even, I'm sure, Marlene and Dorcas had a place in his heart because he does everything to help them win the war and live in peace.

Anti-Snape vs Pro Snape;

Severus Snape, like Albus, is a many-layered character. He is defensive and strict and is a bully throughout his adulthood. He is brave and courageous, stubborn and selfless.

Snape is not dark or light. He is not black or white. He is a Morally-Grey character through and through. There is no arguing against that.

Severus as a kid has done nothing wrong. The argument of him being obsessed with Lily when he was NINE is a very wrong thing to say. He was, as explained in the Pottermore likely abused by his father who was a drunkard, and from the writing in the books, his mother was likely neglectful as well. A kid who has gone through that will not have good social skills, or know how to talk to anyone politely. The fact that he is living in a dark neighborhood is probably an aspect of this as well.

He used accidental magic on Petunia, and he had no fault in it just like Harry had no fault when he deflated his aunt. Petunia insulted his mother, just like Marge insulted Lily. He had no control over his emotions, and thus, the accidental magic is not him being a hater.

During the train ride, all he said was he wanted to be in Slytherin. Why? Who knows, maybe his mother was sorted there and he wanted to feel closer to her. James and Sirius immediately attacked him with their words after that. Again, he is a kid. An 11 years old kid. He did not have a fault in that.

During his years at Hogwarts, he faced many more of the Marauder's bullying. And, yes, it was bullying, J.K Rowling said it, in the books even Harry thinks it is bullying, and Sirius accepts that fairly easily.

In his fifth year at Hogwarts, he is a fifteen-year-old and Sirius is 16 years old, Sirius sent him down the Willow Tree in the full moon. Why? Of that, I have a few theories but we don't know if any of them are true. He sent him down there on a FULL MOON, where Remus transformed, wanting to get a laugh of it.

He was almost killed, but saved by his enemy James Potter at the last second. He was forced to keep shut about this, which definitely added to his many traumas throughout his life. He was punished while he was the definite victim in this situation, along with Remus who was used by his best friend.

After this werewolf prank, it is obvious that the bullying got worse. It is probably because the Marauders had to do something to not let their friendship crumble, and blaming the whole situation on the victim, who is someone they hate or at the very least dislike seemed a good idea in their eyes. And thus, Snape's Worst Memory happened.

Lily and Severus' relationship was already falling apart by the fifth year. After the prank, they confronted each other and talked about the things they witnessed.

It is very disturbing how Severus did not care that Mulciber and Avery used dark magic on an innocent Gryffindor called Mary MacDonald. However, he also points out that the Marauders used a hex to grow Bertham Abrey's, a Slytherin's head grow his head twice its size. It is not Dark Magic, but clearly illegal. This hows that Marauders bullied everyone they could from Slytherin, and Sirius even admitted that himself.

Both of them are set in their ways. Lily doesn't acknowledge that Severus has to spend time with the Slytherins as he is a Slytherin himself. And Severus doesn't acknowledge that using Dark Magic to harm others is disturbing when others use Light Spells to hurt others instead, not realizing that both of them are wrong.

In SWM Lily definitely doesn't do everything she can do, along with Remus. They both are prefects but Remus stood back, and Lily only confronted the Marauders, not bothering to inform a professor at the very least.

Severus was very wrong in saying Mudblood to Lily. Sure, he was under a lot of stress, and he is a Half-Blood so the term also applies to him, but it was the last damage to crumble the wall of friendship the two had between them. But he did not deserve to get his trousers to get taken down and get threatened to be stripped completely. That was sexual assault, and no one deserves that.

After all of that, he apologized and left Lily alone. He was not obsessed with her. I'm sorry, but no one is saying that you cannot love a person who is in another relationship. It is not a crime, and he didn't even tell Lily about his feelings. (And I do not believe that 'feelings' were romantic. It was most definitely platonic, It is written like one, and the strong lesson the HP Series has is the power of Love.)

He went Dark after graduating, but when he discovered that he was going to be the cause of his ex-best friend's death he deflected quickly. I do not understand how people find this creepy. Regulus 'deflected' (not fully) for Kreacher, Narcissa, and Lucius for Draco and Albus for Ariana.

He agreed to be a spy for Albus and took a Vow to completely submit himself to a cause he had not yet believed completely in. After Lily's death, his life was devoted to protecting Harry.

He was a bully during his adult years. Now, it is mostly because traumatized people act mature, but their mentality goes backward, and the proper age of becoming fully mature comes later on. With his state, it would be at the very earliest when he was 53 that he would be fully mature, but it is also because he cannot let go of the past and heal from it.

He treated Harry and Neville horribly when not in class. And in class, he was strict with everyone. Even the others were the victim of his bad attitude.

However, no matter how mean he wanted his students to be safe. He protected Harry because of the Vow, that is true, however, he also protected and attempted to protect every other student, like the time he was worried for Ginny when he was taken into the Chamber.

He was a shitty person with a shitty backstory. He had no control over his emotions when he was with Harry, and bullied him because of his looks leaning towards James. It was not acceptable, and he was most definitely a bully, but he was not an abuser.

He despised physical punishments and refrained from physically attacking others, and the only exception was when Harry invaded his privacy when he looked into the pensieve.

He truly believed in the reasoning of the Light after all those years under the Vow. When it was clear that Harry was going to die no matter what he did, he did not go off to Voldemort to give him the secrets Dumbledore told him, no, he tried to protect his students and aided Harry secretly to destroy the Hocruxes.

He died a hero. Without him, the first Wizarding War would be won by Voldemort and everyone would be at Riddle's service to torture or kill or use. If he was loyal to Voldemort, the Battle of Hogwarts would end up with Voldemort truly killing Harry, and the whole fate was on his shoulders.

He is the bravest man throughout the series. He is a Hero, He is an Anti-Hero, he is an awesome spy, he is a bully, he is bitter, he is selfless, he is stubborn, he is loyal, and he is many more combined together.

He is not a villain, and he is not an evil reincarnate of a Nazi. He is a good person with bad doings. He is not innocent but he definitely deserved to be both praised and put down for all of the things he did.

[rintarousgirl]

i wanna be yours -- 3. arabella

✦ - Y/N is a small business owner, offering her services not only as a designer but an at-home makeup artist and cosmetic producer as well. She's perfectly content with her small life when she's approached by the manager of the INARIZAKI band, asking for her to fill the position of backstage artist on short notice. Needing the money, and wanting the experience, Y/N agrees. Little does she know of the fatal attraction she will share with the band's lead, Suna Rintarou.

»»————-　★　————-««

Shopping had been surprisingly easy for you, and you'd managed to save some of Kita's money to buy some more makeup supplies that you may need. You were certainly going to need a surplus of it if you were going to do four guys makeup every day.

You had packed all the outfits you'd bought into a suitcase, giving yourself more to drag along behind you. Rubbing at your face, you stared at yourself in the mirror. You hadn't bothered much with your own appearance, but you were due to leave in an hour and you looked like a mess.

Sighing, you grabbed some concealer and lip-gloss and put it on, so you didn't look as exhausted as you felt. Your hair was thrown up to be out of your face, so you weren't constantly trying to brush it out of your face while applying. Your outfit was just as simple, a white tank-top and some black jeans. You didn't want to wear clothes you cared about as you knew makeup made a mess, and you'd probably be running around.

Pulling out your phone, you send a quick text to the groupchat.

Despite showing up a good hour and a half before the show started, you found yourself weaving through crowds of people, dragging your suitcase of clothes and bag of makeup behind you. You manage not to grab much attention thankfully, swiping the backstage card you'd been giving and checking in with two security guards by the dressing room.

It's large, is what you noticed first, and dimly lit. Though you have multiple mirrors that light up, so that should be enough. There are two costume racks for you to hang up the clothes you'd bought.

Placing your stuff down, you open the connecting door that led backstage. The stage was big, or at least, the biggest you've seen in person. You hadn't been to many concerts, but you remembered going to one with Bokuto a while back. It was in a small little space, not too overwhelming, but as you looked past the stage and into the crowd you felt that familiar rustling of fear grows in your gut.

You shouldn't be scared, you know that. You were doing what you did best, after all, you weren't even the one preforming. Your fear was stupid, but you couldn't help the worries that floated through your mind. What if your makeup gave one of them an allergic reaction? Or you didn't have the right foundation and concealer for their skintones? Or you made a big mistake somehow and there wasn't enough time to fix it?

Kita's appearance snapped your out of your worries, placing a warm hand on your shoulder. "Y/N," he greeted warmly, "I know you've just arrived but I'm gonna need you to start working immediately."

You nod, "Of course, send them my way," you giggle, trying to keep your own mood light. Kita smiles, before drifting off to yell a few orders at some crewmen. You shuffle your way back into the dressing room, propping the door open with a chair before beginning to set up your station. You pull out four chairs and set them up along the long desk with mirrors.

You organize your makeup, putting them into categories along with the brushes and blenders. You'd cleaned them all extensively, and even bought some new ones. Once you were satisfied with that, you began to hang up the clothing on racks.

Aran walked in first just as you started hanging up the clothes on the second rack, the Miya twins and Suna slinking in beside him.

"Ah," you hum with a small, stressed smile, "take a seat!"

They listen, and you can hear the social media audios playing on their phone. On tiktok and instagram and twitter. You wish you could talk to your friends like they could, but you didn't want to waste any time.

After all the clothes had been hung, you divided the group. You were going to have Suna and Aran do makeup first as the twins tried on outfits for you to decide. Atsumu seemed to be delighted that he'd get to do a little fashion show, which you agreed. You loved trying on new clothes yourself.

You start on Aran, seeing as you were able to be more comfortable with him. If you got relaxed on your first client, you should be good for the rest. You work swiftly and dedicatedly, only stopping to judge which outifts you liked.

You dab on concealer and swipe minimal amounts of blush onto his cheeks. You manage to brush on some mascara, though he isn't up to the idea of eyeliner. You put some chapstick on his lips, seeing as you'd bought a whole new pack just for tonight.

You pause, brushing his dreads out of his face as you brushed his eyebrows.

"Uh, Kita never said anything about doing your hair..."

Osamu, emerging from the attatched bathroom, waved a hand in dismissal. "We're guys, it doesn't matter." You huff, shaking your head with amusement. "How's this outfit?"

You look up, and a smile crawls across your face. He's wearing a simple white and black striped shirt, with some beige cargo pants. You'd dress it up with accessories, of course, but otherwise it's perfect.

"It's great," you say, "I'll get to your makeup after Suna."

It was great timing that Aran had finished just as Osamu found the perfect outfit, so you sent Aran in as Osamu sat down. You could hear Atsumu's complaints about "nothing looking good on him" from the bathroom, wincing a bit.

You shift over to Suna, who was already looking at you expectantly. You give him a small smile, and his lips twitch. "Can I have your wrist?" you ask, holding out your hand. Slowly, he offers it up, and you begin to swatch shades on his skin.

You go through about three, before settling on an ivory tone. You paint small triangles on his skin, on his main spots that would be hit by the stage lights. You blend them softly, fighting to ignore the way his soft breath hit your throat and how his eyes kept trying to meet yours.

He smelled of tea, you noticed. Hot tea and fresh cookies. It was kind of comforting, reminded you of a lazy summer afternoon in some weird way. You felt yourself relax more and more.

Atsumu and Aran came out at the same time, both having decided on an outfit. "I don't care if you don't like it, Y/N, I am so tired of changing," Atsumu complains. You look up, trying not to judge too harshly. He wore a dark grey jersey with the number 5 on it along with some ripped black jeans. It was fine, maybe a few necklaces would bring some shine to it. You nod your consent, and he sagged into his seat.

Aran on the other hand had some baggy black jeans as well, with some chains hanging from his belt loop. He had on a simple white t-shirt and a red flannel. You'd accept that too. You figured the theme they'd keep to was black, whites, and greys, so you got a lot of those along with some pops of color here and there.

Suna did allow you to do eyeliner, which you tried not to shake too much as you dragged the pencil on his waterline. You smudged it ever so slightly, giving him a natural smokey eye without any actual eyeshadow necessary. You dab on a bit of highlighter to his cheeks and nose.

When you dragged the chapstick across his lips, your heart skipped a beat. The way he stared at you felt completely unprofessional, even though he hadn't done anything but meet your eyes and stare at your lips. The stick caught on his lip, and due to your trembling, you had to occasionally swipe a finger across his lips to wipe off any globs of chapstick.

"Thanks," he rasped, when you gave him the go to find an outfit. You hummed shakily, before waving Osamu and Atsumu over. You figured you could do them both at the same time considering they'd use the same shades.

Suna came back around the same time you finished Osamu and Atsumu's makeup, dressed in a black t-shirt with some white thin floral designs with a white-long sleeve underneath. He wore some gray cargo pants to blend in the clashing white and black easier.

"Uhm," you stutter, checking the time. They had thirty minutes. You needed to accessorize then let them warm up quickly. "Stand in a line, please."

They listen, and babble as you go around. You give Atsumu a few layered necklaces to put on, and Osamu a black baseball cap. Aran already has the chains on his belt loops, so you deem him fine, thankful that he'd dressed himself up, even going as far to put beads in his hair.

Turning to Suna, you open up a package of rings you'd bought with him specifically in mind. His pretty hands, uncalloused where they plucked the strings of his rhythmic guitar or held onto the mic stand as he sang.

You individually put them on his fingers, not trusting him to decide where they'd look good. They were all silver, and relatively simple. You knew they'd drag a positive light to his fingers, just as the belt loops would drag attention by fans to Aran's hips and the baseball cap to Osamu's face and the necklaces to Atsumu's throat.

They were all features that you knew people would be attracted to, especially their online following. You'd seen how people reacted to twitter to pictures Akaashi and Kuroo posted. It was part of the reason Akaashi now had a private account, he got tired of dealing with all the people in his dms and replies.

You stand there awkwardly, trying not to cower with their eyes on you. You adjust a few things here and there and brush a bit of setting powder on their faces.

"Good luck guys!" you say, giving them one of your best smiles and a thumbs up. Aran gives you a little smirk, and the twins give you identical beams. Suna instead tilts his head, amusement clear on his face.

"Thanks Y/N," he whispers, his hand brushing your arm. His skin was cold on your feverish skin, and you feel your heart pound in your chest. They leave backstage, and you hear the feedback of the mic and the pounding of drums as they begin to rush through their warmup.

Kita meets you backstage, handing you a water bottle that you accept gratefully. You take small sips from it, the cool water feeling great on your tongue. "You might want to bring your supplies out here. During breaks you'd want to touch them up and you don't have much time to pause."

You nod, and head back to grab some setting powder, mascara, blush, and concealer. You place them on a small table beside the stairs leading backstage, next to a bunch of water bottles and small snacks. You steal a carrot off a veggie platter as you set up your supplies.

Soon enough, the band is walking off stage as the security guards begin to let people in. You notice the band's target audience seems to be teen girls and young adults. You hadn't heard their songs, but their audience was still ranging from young to people almost your mother's age. Biting down on your lip, you look back to the boys who look completely in their element.

Aran seemed very relaxed you noticed, an easy-going smile on his lips as he talks softly with Osamu. Pre-concert jitters didn't seem to get to him like they were to Atsumu, who was peering around the curtain anxiously. He twirled his sticks in his hands, clearly hoping to play soon.

Suna slides up next to you, stealing a brownie from the tray.

"Are you nervous?" he asked, with that sweet-smooth voice of his. His words were quiet, you noticed, even when he was talking casually. You didn't deem him the quiet type to be honest, but the more time you spent around him the more it made sense. Suna just wasn't the type of guy who yelled, he wasn't like Bokuto and Hinata.

You were very excited to hear him sing, to see how that raspy voice translated into a loud enough belt to overpower the other instruments and the crowd, microphone or not.

"A little," you admit, hugging your arms around yourself, "though it's kind of stupid. I'm not even the one preforming."

He shrugs, taking a bite of the brownie. "Kiy--our old makeup artist got the same way," he says, and you decide to ignore the pause in his voice, "she was always nervous that we didn't look our best, and that'd she'd done a bad job."

"Did I?" you ask softly, looking up at him. Even though the lights were off, his eyes shone like emeralds. You had done good to your standards, but you hadn't seen the old artist's work. Who knows what kind of miracles she was pulling off.

"No. You did good, Y/N, really good," he compliments, and you try not to blush as you bite down on your lip.

"Thank you," you say bashfully, bowing your head.

"Does it come natural to you? Putting on makeup, I mean."

You sigh. "I guess? It didn't at first, but after so many years I could probably do a natural look in my sleep."

"It looked natural," he said, meeting your eyes. He looks at you softly, and you feel your breath hitch in your throat. Suna's smiling, you notice. He's giving you a small genuine little smile. "I watched you. Didn't even look like you were struggling."

"Well, thank you, Suna. It means a lot," you giggle, struggling to hold eye-contact.

There's a moment where you're both silent, just staring at each other. His eyes drift from your eyes to your lips, then to your trembling hands. His own hands lift from his sides, as if he was about to touch you, before falling back down and shoving into his pockets. "You're welcome," he says slowly.

And then there's nothing else you can say to each other, because the curtains are closing and the band has to take their spots. As he stands in front of the microphone, guitar strap across his shoulders, he looks over to you.

Reasonably, he could've been looking at anybody behind you, but you still lift up your hands and give him an enthusiastic thumbs up. He lets out a chuckle, though you can't hear it, and turns back to the curtains as they begin to open.

The crowd is borderline roaring, phones raised high and people shouting names.

You catch sight of Atsumu's wicked grin, before he begins a pounding drum solo to start off the first song.

Your heart catches in anticipation as you watch Suna strum his guitar slightly, and his mouth open as he begins to sing.

»»————-　★　————-««

<- previous | next -> | masterlist

fun facts! :

★ - when picturing how the band sounds it’s obviously inspired by arctic monkeys but also think like chase atlantic and maneskin.

★ - suna’s really trying to talk to y/n, but he isn’t the best conversationalist 😭

★ - osamu’s baseball cap is supposed to be like the one he has in the canon time skip

taglist:

@mannaornot / @gojoscumslut / @sunarots / @alienvarmint / @fleoresies / @tkooooop / @cheriesdear / @shotenvinsoot / @wolffmaiden / @riiceandsoup / @thebrownemo / @vivian-555 / @effmigentlywithachainsaw / @rukia-uchiha-98 / @weird0o0 / @seiamor / @rory-cakes / @blue-violin / @reveusecherie / @hellokittylover9 / @yourlocal-bunny / @keniza / @cerberuspuppy1

[kittenintheden]

Not Your Sweetheart Ch 34 - Lavender

Not Your Sweetheart Chapter 34 - Lavender

The one where I absolutely delight in reminding everyone that Astarion has a dead average 10 charisma and an 18 CHA Tav gives him a run for his goddamn money in all the best and most angsty ways.

AKA "gets away with it bc hottie w/a body" meets "wins every social interaction and is also troubled and hot."

AKA the seducer gets seduced and he's mad about it, until he isn't.

But also it's a whole campaign? You know. Do not enter unless you're expecting true-to-life D&D -- everyone hot as hell but stupid as fuck. Get your top-shelf found family and hotties battling for flirt dominance tropes here. 

---

We start off with some spicy and end on some sweet and everything in between is incredibly awkward and funny. Read on AO3.

Commissioned piece of the dorks by the fantastically talented @hamrikaa (see the full thing in Ch 10).

---

“Are you cold?” comes a voice from beside him.

He whips his head around to find the tiefling girl peering up at him. When she doesn’t look away, he glances around to see who she was talking to. “What?” he says.

Arabella points at his arm. “I rub my arms like that when I’m cold. Are you cold?”

“No,” Astarion says, forcing his arms to his side. He clears his throat and looks out over the camp until she wanders off.

She does not wander off.

“Sorry,” she says, though she doesn’t sound it. “I just thought maybe some of you were getting sick.”

“Why would you think that?” he sneers down at her, folding his arms in front of him so he doesn’t fidget.

The girl arches an eyebrow at him. “At least half of you were moaning and groaning partway through the night. I thought it was whatever you all ate. I think Karlach may have been hallucinating. She kept talking to someone who wasn’t there. If you’re not sick, then what?”

Astarion stares. The gears in his head turn, click into place, and he takes a sizable step back.

“No,” he says, putting more space between them. “I am not the one for that talk, no. I’m going to go away now. Do not follow me. Ever again.”

Arabella frowns a little at his retreating back before two of the women walk by, each carrying rations and water toward the fire. The tiefling sighs and says after them, “That’s not what you had last night, is it?”

Shadowheart stops and looks around, confused. “I don’t think so. Why?”

“Don’t want to end up with a bellyache. You all were louder than Mirkon’s snoring until late.”

The half-elf goes immediately pink up to the tips of her ears. “We, erm,” she says. Swallows. “No one was sick. The food is fine.”

“Then what in the hells?” Arabella huffs. “No one tells me anything.”

Shadowheart’s mouth works as she tries to formulate a response.

Before she can get there, Lae’zel says, “I imagine you overheard us having various forms of intercourse, child.”

Very slowly, Shadowheart turns to look at her with wide eyes.

[bellatrixnightshade]

Earthlings and Aliens

@liketwoswansinbalance

here it is!

Well, this was actually an experimental bit of writing I published so it isn't technically finished, and this AU is more "free range" for now. It has endless possibilities and plots I would like to use, so I don't think I will write a strict storyline to it.

Midas couldn't believe his eyes when he found the Rhian from the stories standing right in front of him.

An actual extraterrestrial being.

Midas had always heard that aliens were grotesque and strange creatures that looked nothing like human beings, yet here Rhian was, no older than he was.

Granted, Rhian still had certain vibes that could not be from this planet. Unearthly beauty. His blue eyes had some sparkle in the irises and the puplis, like miniature stars in the evening sky. His wild blonde hair and his skin also had touches of sparkle and shine. And were those antennae? Midas was not hypnotized or impressed, to Rhian’s misfortune. In fact, he was filled with distrust. He didn't trust this stranger, much less one who was ogling at him.

Rhian, on the other hand, was enchanted by Midas at first sight. The boy didn't look like the other Earthlings– so common and uninteresting. He could have been the child of either sun or moon: his sweet looking gray eyes and his terracotta skin and copper curls made him look otherworldly.

"I don't want to go to your school," he snapped. "It isn't worth leaving Bongo or my home."

Rhian smiled, and this made Midas bristle. What was so funny? Was he really so inconsiderate? Being kidnapped by an alien was an Earthling's worst fear.

"Don't worry," he said, aiming a glowing finger at Midas to stun him, "you will be treated well on the way there. Wouldn't that be nice, to ride in an actual spaceship?"

"I don't know. I'm warning you, don't let my father or a safety official see you. Once they see an alien, it's over. The governments of Planet Earth are terrified of aliens. They think people like you will bomb us and annihilate us. They believe you will bring strange drugs and your people here." 

Rhian was about to laugh. 

These Earthlings were the most stupid people he had ever encountered. A toddler from his planet could easily destroy this neighborhood. And Rafal, RAFAL, the logical, cold, calculating, intelligent twin actually believed in these idiots, in their so-called potential. Maybe Rhian needed to take Rafal to the doctor. Maybe he was becoming sick in the head.

A snake slithered across the grass and Midas bent down to stroke its head. He glowered at Rhian. "I'm telling you, my dad's coming home any minute and when he sees you, he will-" He was interrupted by screams and his neighbors calling each other.

Midas left his backyard to his front door to get to the source of the screaming, stamping,  and unusual noise, traveling two blocks away. Arabella's house? Midas thought. Did she purchase drugs or something?"

Rhian was about to trail after him, but he turned to a giant screen. On display for the public view, were three disabled androids on the street. 

Rafal, he thought with despair. Rafal would fight like this. Rafal was in trouble. Rhian vaguely remembered Rafal heading in that direction for his special Earthling…

Rhian desperately wanted to go to the spaceship and leave with Midas. Let his brother fend for himself. Yet, Rhian didn't have Rafal's key and it wouldn't let him activate it without the key. Plus, he didn't know how Rafal got here and what directions he used. He didn't pay any attention. As he approached the house where his brother must undoubtedly be trapped in, he heard obnoxious yelling inside. Rhian remembered to use his disguise, and his antennae curled in his hair. This was more stressful than he thought. He could even feel them become more and more purple. No wonder his brother always hid them, even at home. 

"We need to scan your chip," an android said. "For your resistance, we have called extra forces."

A woman was sobbing. "My daughter told me everything. She told me this foreign freak wanted to take her away. To God knows where!" 

Rafal refused to go near the android. He was doomed if they scanned his chip, anyway. The android came to him, scanning it without his consent.

"Identity not recognized," it said. "You are under arrest for suspected terrorism, attempted abduction, and illegal entrance into our planet. Please follow us."

"I am not following you," Rafal snapped. "If you make me, I will make sure you share the same fate as those other stupid robots."

The woman looked up, glaring at him. "They already called humans against you. They will track you down and kill you, just like your people deserve. How dare you enter our world! We have had enough wars. We don’t need anymore, much less from invaders like your kind."

Rhian was silently watching. Midas was right. He hoped his dad wouldn't watch.

"Is she your friend?" Rhian asked, pointing to a redheaded girl, enamored with his brother. To his disgust, Midas' attention was also turned towards his brother.

"We are classmates and neighbors," Midas said slowly. "You brought more aliens, didn't you? More creatures to take our people to your home."

"Oh, he's just my brother," Rhian said quickly. "He was the one who brought me here. This wasn't my idea in the first-" The helicopters landed, and Rafal ran outside as far as he could, Arabella following after him. Someone in the crowd held a jar with a tiny Marialena inside. "They are infiltrating our home!" He screamed. Rafal eyed Rhian's disguise  in the crowd. Arabella headed in that direction. Suddenly, gunshots rang out and the crowd stepped back.

Rafal was hit. The police dragged him inside their plane. He was certainly doomed. He also found Rhian with another handsome boy. Again? He instructed Arabella to go to the ship as soon as possible and he gave her the key. She made a huge mistake in telling her mother, but she didn't know any better. Now she did. In case Rafal died here, at least Rhian had the key. At least he could fly home to safety.Arabella's mother had stabbed him in the stomach with a kitchen knife, then screamed "911" at her virtual assistant. Rafal wished he had obliterated that stupid computer program. He wished he had bombed this whole neighborhood.

[athenasparrow]

“you left your underwear back at my place.” Jily

Because this made me laugh when I read it

I hope this makes you laugh too @liiilyevans 😂

Rating: M

Send me a prompt

When Lily wakes up, it’s to a pounding headache and a bitter taste in her mouth that informs her – in a voice that sounds eerily like Petunia – that she shouldn’t have downed the five flaming vodka shots at the end of the night. But Marlene had already ordered them and it would’ve been such a waste.

Lily groans and reaches for her phone, determined to tell Marlene off for making her feel so damn horrible, but she's rather distracted by the message that blinks innocently at her on the screen.

Unknown: Hi : D You left your underwear at my place. Let me know when you're awake - I can drop them off.

Lily stares at the message...someone has obviously typed in the wrong number; it was hazy, but she remembers getting in the cab alone. And her underwear was still–

Oh no.

Lily frantically yanks up her dress, staring in horror at her very knickerless–

Lily: Who is this?

Had she shagged the cab driver? She couldn’t remember if he was cute or not. Oh god, what if she’d given in to the building super who had been hitting on her for months. He was like fifty! That would explain why he had her number. Shit, double shit. 

Lily: Is this Horace? 

Unknown: Wait, you're shagging Slughorn?

A wave of pure relief swept through Lily; she was not – thank god – shagging her super.

Lily: No! No more questions!

Who are you?

I’ve woken up with no knickers and am now checking the opening hours for my nearest chemist so I can go buy a fucking pregnancy test.

And get an STI screening!

I do not have time for games right now!

Tell me who you are and return my knickers at once!

Unknown:

Woah, hold on a sec

You don’t need a pregnancy test or an STI screening

At least not because of last night

Lily:

And how would you know that genius?

Unless you’re infertile and a virgin there’s a chance of both!

Again, who am I speaking with?????

Unknown: I am neither infertile nor a virgin

Lily: Then you don’t “know” shit, do you?

Unknown: But we did not have sex last night

Lily: Oh!

Unknown: And this is your neighbour, James

Lily: I don’t have a neighbour named James!

James: I beg to differ. Listen, can you answer your door?

Even with that warning, Lily still jumped when a sharp rap sounded in her apartment. She had quite a few things to say to this man! She didn’t have a neighbour named James; she would know, she’d been living in this apartment for three years. Alice and Frank lived down the hall – they were looking for a bigger place since the arrival of their little one – in number seven. Arabella – a lady who had more cats than square metres – lived in number six. Number five held a charming set of twins – Gideon and Fabian – who Lily was happy to flirt with every time they got mail at the same time. She was in number five and number four–

Oh no.

Lily doesn't have time to stop her hand as it reaches out in front of her and opens the door.

Fit bloke from number four.

He looks even more delicious and Lily is suddenly rather regretful he’d said they hadn’t shagged. But she’s distracted from that thought by the sudden assault of memories.

***

“Pads?” James calls, hearing the door slam shut. He barely glances up from his phone as he frowns at the latest next his mother’s sent him. 

He does jump up at the ensuing crash – and rather loud silence in place of his brother’s usual greeting – running to the hallway and greeted with a rather strange sight.

The beautiful redhead from number five is sprawled out on his floor and seems to be giving her shoe a rather harsh verbal lashing.

“What are you making me trip for, you stupid thing!”

“Are you sure it’s the shoe that made you trip and not the several glasses of whatever you’ve been drinking?” James interrupts with a laugh.

She spins around, obviously caught by surprise, before letting out a triumphant yell as she yanks one heel off, then the other, tossing them carelessly over her shoulder. James winces at the mark the first one leaves on his wall but decides it’s nothing when her second shoe narrowly misses the vase his mother had gifted him.

“I think you’re in the wrong apartment,” James says kindly. She looked quite plastered. “Would you like me to–”

“I’m not in the wrong apartment!” Lily interrupts confidently. “You’re fit-man!”

“I’m James actually?” James says, rather bewildered. “And if anyone is fit here, it’s you!”

The redhead looks rather delighted at his compliment. “That’s excellent that you think so! This will work rather nicely then!”

“What will work nic– Hey! What are you doing?” 

Jame thinks it’s a fair question since she’s hiked up her dress – he was not going to look – and was tugging her deep blue lacy knickers – no looking! – down her pale legs. 

“Well, how are we supposed to do it with them on?” The redhead says, shooting him a look that James thinks is supposed to mean duh when in reality, he’s quite far from understanding anything at the moment.

“It?” James asks, clearing his throat and happy she doesn't appear to notice he sounds like a frog.

“Don’t you know what sex is?” And now she’s giggling at him, bright and free and drunk.

“I know what sex is,” James feels the need to clarify. “But we can’t do it right now.” No matter how much I wish we could.

“Why not?” She demands, her eyes wide – and mesmerising – and horrified as she stares at him.

“Because you’re drunk,” James breaks to her gently, fighting back a laugh. “And I don’t even know your name.”

“Lily.” A pause. “I suppose it would be odd to have sex with me when you don’t know my name.”

James nods vigorously, glad she’s seeing some sense. Hopefully he can convince her to go back to her apartment so he doesn't have to keep telling his cock to stay the fuck down. 

“It’s a pity I’m drunk,” she tells him. “I was really hoping for an orgasm before bed, it really helps me sleep, you know?”

James chokes on the very air he was supposed to be breathing. He does know but he’s not going to tell her that. “I suppose you’ll have to sort that out yourself."

Lily heaves a long sigh like he’s announced Christmas has been cancelled. “Are you sure you can’t help me?” she pouts.

You’re sure James, he tells himself sternly. 

“I’m sure,” he confirms. “You’re drunk.” He says this out loud for his benefit as much as for hers.

“So you would help me if I wasn’t drunk?” 

I would bury my face between your legs and make you cum over and over again.

“Would love to,” James says instead. “If you still want to of course.”

“I’ll still want to,” Lily declares surely and James hopes so, but he won’t hold it against her if she doesn’t. “Oh no!”

“Oh no what?” 

“I’m going to be sick.”

Well shit. 

James scrambles to his feet, thankful the bathroom is in the hallway as he helps her stand and rushes her to the toilet. He holds her hair as she retches into the toilet and offers her a glass of water when she’s done. 

“Now I’ve ruined it” Lily sighs regretfully as she leans her cheek against the toilet seat.

“Ruined what?”

“My sexiness! This is decidedly un-sexy.”

He shouldn’t be flirting – she's drunk – but James can’t help but reassure her. “You could throw up in my toilet all day long and I’ll still think you're beautiful.”

“You would?”

“I would. But let’s talk about this tomorrow, okay? I think you could use some sleep.”

“You’re fit and nice. Do you think I could marry you someday?”

“How about we go on a sober date first,” James proposes, shoving aside the image of her in a white dress that his traitorous mind procures.

“If we must,” Lily hums, letting him pull her up. She grabs a pen off his console and – rather neatly, given how drunk she is – writes her number on his arm. “Now you can find me again!”

She looks so pleased with herself that James doesn’t remind her he only needs to walk three metres to her door. Instead, he grabs her shoes as he guides her out his door and down the hallway. When he sees her safely to bed – her eyes are already heavy – he slips out to leave her in peace. 

Damn. Her knickers.

He grins as he reaches into his pocket for his phone, typing in the numbers neatly scrawled on his arm.

James: Hi : D You left your underwear at my place…