#susan nathaniel

[funeral]

Susan Nathiel, Daughters of Madness

[skatingthinandice]

SUSAN HART & NATHANIEL CROKER Ripper Street 5.06 "Occurrence Reports"

[abs0luteb4stard]

W A T C H I N G

[creative-soul-22]

Thoughts on Queen Narissa & Nathaniel

Narissa and Nathaniel appear like the comedic villain-duo like Kronk and Yzma (the beautiful evil mastermind and the stupid, ugly sidekick).

But there is SO MUCH MORE to them!

Obviously Nathaniel is truly, madly, deeply in love with Narissa. That's actually quite sad when you think about how cold-hearted she is and how badly she treats him. She abuses his will to do literally everything for her to make him do things he doesn't want to because Nathaniel isn't all that cold-hearted. And yet he hasn't got a choice to stand up against her since he knows she has power over him not only because he depends on her.

Given that they are both from our world Nathaniel might also stick around Narissa because he probably hopes to still be able to safe her. He might knew (and loved) her before she became evil, making it even harder for him to stand against her. He was forced to watch Narissa turning bad and couldn't do anything.

Narissa might got cursed when she married the former king of Andalasia with the same curse Giselle gets cursed when wishing for a fairytale life in "Disenchanted". When Giselle wishes for a fairytale life, she is Morgan's stepmother and Narissa had become Edward's stepmother by marrying the king.

Narissa sends Endward troll-hunting every morning to distract him from finding a girl and marrying in order to remain in power. Like the book in the picture says: "She lived in fear that one day her stepson would marry and she would lose her throne forever." That might sound selfish of her but given that she is from the real world where she once gave her whole life up, leaving family and friends behind who probably assume that she's dead makes it less selfish. Even if she left no friends and family behind, she still has been gone for a very long time in which New York changed a lot. One way or another, she has no home to return to. The throne is all she got. She is not from Andalasia. So if she loses the throne she'll probably be kicked out of Andalasia because there is no need for her anymore. So of course the idea of probably ending up in a New York where everything has changed with nothing except her clothes and nowhere to return to frightens her so she does everything to remain in the throne.

Nathaniel has zero self-confidence since he considers himself ugly. He knows he is not as handsome as Prince Edward making him the ugly guy in Andalasia. And he hates himself for that. In the motel he realizes he needs to love himself if he wants Narissa to love him, because how should she be able to love him if he even can't love himself? The thing is he thinks there is nothing to love about him so he assumes Narissa will never love him what ends him up in a bar. You can see he has been crying when on top of all this Narissa appears in his drink and scolds him for being unsuccessful in his attempts to kill Giselle.

She also calls him "worthless" when she finds him in New York.

When Robert wakes up Giselle with a true love's kiss, Nathaniel realizes everything is lost for Narissa and that it's too late for her. He might sees that no one can save her and turns down on her. He then finds the courage to stand up against her and threat her with the sword. This must be hard for him since he is letting Narissa go, knowing she is not the woman anymore that she used to be. Narissas death is tragic yet a mercy since her life wouldn't have been worth living after all that has happened at the ball.

Nathaniel, however, moves on and becomes a bestselling-author by writing a book about Narissa ("My Royal Pain: Vanquishing the Evil Queen Within").

[sorqpmusicmin]

Christ is Living in Me

I have been crucified with Christ and the life I live now is not my own Christ is living in me

I still live my human life, but it is a life of faith in the Son of God who loved me and gave Himself for me

I have been crucified with Christ and the life I live now is not my own Christ is living in me

I will not treat God's gracious gift as pointless If justice is available through the law, then Christ died to no purpose at all

[waywordsstudio]

TBR Pile: 2024 Preview Reads: Poetry -

TBR Pile: 2024 Preview Reads: Poetry - Books I'm most looking forward to in 2024!

[dostoyevsky-official]

who are some contemporary writers you recommend?

of those i've read that i can remember off the top of my head, i enjoyed: dostoyevsky, because he is always contemporary, colum mccann, colm toibin, orhan pamuk, elif batuman, nathaniel tarn, rita dove, bill knott, anne carson, salley rooney (qualifier: despite limiting the list to fiction and poetry, only her nonfiction), patricia lockwood, kazuo ishiguro, jerome rothenberg, charles bernstein, susan howe, and really anyone else of the language poets, joyce carol oates, and @intactics

[ophii]

are there still fnaf fans in 2024 that care about these guys.......... they are my children

au stuff below cut

okokSO some of them have full names in my au lets goo

obviously evan and elizabeths last names are afton. im gonna go with evan nathaniel afton becvause why not,, and elizabeth marie afton because, again, why not

susies full name is susan and her fullfull name is susan rose meyer

fritz is fritz kieran miller. susie and fritz get german last names cause theyre german in my au. fritz is also irish

cassidy and jeremy are siblings bc why not!! cassidy astrantia chihara and jeremiah allium chihara. flower middle names moment

gabriels name is gabriel levi smith. idk

charlies is obvious. but im giving her a middle name. charlotte lee emily

yeah thats it!! some of them have birth months: charlies is may, evans is november, fritzs is july, susies is april, andd thats all i have figured out.

OH and ethnicites bc ...yeah

elizabeth and evan are british and half hispanic. they get their dads genes, clearly. dw michael has some melanin

charlie is mixed: white and indian

cassidy and jeremy are japanese

fritz and susie are german. fritz, like i said, is also irish

gabriel is african american

ok thats enough ranting GOODBYE!!

[rhysdarbinizedarby]

Our Flag Means Death Season 2: Exclusive First Look

Vanity Fair joins Stede, Blackbeard, and the rest of the cast on set in New Zealand for an exclusive early look at the second season, debuting on Max in October.

BY SARAH CATHERALL (AUGUST 24, 2023)

Only the fans of Our Flag Means Death can determine whether they’ll be satisfied with the show’s second season, which debuts on Max in October. But if you ask Fernando Frias, who directed three of the season’s episodes, he sounds pretty confident: “If my life depended on saying whether it’s yes or no, I would say yes.’’

It’s December 8, 2022, and the principal actors on Our Flag Means Death as well as the 800-plus extras and crew members have three days left of their three-month shoot for season two. Things are starting to get emotional. “You’ve been the most amazing crew I’ve ever worked with,” says one actor as he wraps his final scene. Frias says it’s like leaving “a long summer camp,” adding, “it’s like a family.”

Rhys Darby as Stede Bonnet. COURTESY OF NICOLA DOVE/MAX.

The series created by David Jenkins was a surprise breakout hit when it debuted in the spring of 2022, building a fiercely devoted fan base with its silly yet emotional deadpan, and defiantly queer take on the adventures of real 18th-century pirates. Everyone involved in Our Flag Means Death is eager to preserve the surprises in store for season two, which kicks off with gentleman pirate Stede Bonnet (Rhys Darby) and softhearted bad boy Blackbeard (Taika Waititi) ruefully separated after finally realizing their love for each other at the end of season one.

It’s “going to be unexpected and surprising, but also very pleasurable and satisfying for those who like the show,” promises executive producer Garrett Basch. It “doesn’t follow the expected route,” teases Con O’Neill, who plays Blackbeard’s devoted enforcer, Izzy. All that means is we’re not at liberty to share too much about what happened on set that day, which included emotional conversations, new cast members, banter with the Kiwi crew, and some seriously killer costumes.

But these exclusive new images give a hint of what is in store. There are fresh faces—Minnie Driver will guest-star as the real-life Irish pirate Anne Bonny, and Ruibo Qian joins the cast as the mysterious merchant Susan—and a lot of New Zealand actors and locations, now that the production has decamped across the Pacific.

“The viewers will see the scope of their world has expanded based on the fact we’re able to get to these amazing locations within a short travel time,” says executive producer Antoine Douaihy. “You will notice a marked difference between the two seasons in terms of the scope and the scale.’’

Minnie Driver joins the cast this season as Anne Bonny. COURTESY OF NICOLA DOVE/MAX.

There will be plenty of familiar faces too, of course. On set that day in Kumeu, New Zealand, a rural area about 20 miles outside of Auckland, are Waititi and Darby along their fellow returning cast members O’Neill, Vico Ortiz (Jim), Kristian Nairn (Wee John), Joel Fry (Frenchie), Matthew Maher (Black Pete), Leslie Jones (Spanish Jackie), Samson Kayo (Oluwande), Ewen Bremner (Nathaniel Buttons), Samba Schutte (Roach), and more. New onboard are two Kiwi actors, Madeleine Sami (most recently of the Australian mystery-comedy Deadloch), and Samoan-born Anapela Polataivao. And there’s one returning figure impossible to miss on the soundstage: The Revenge, the stately ship that Blackbeard—a.k.a. Ed—commandeered at the end of season one. In real life it was carefully transported across the Pacific Ocean from the show’s original Los Angeles soundstages.

The Revenge is vast and impressive, much larger in real life than it appears onscreen. But it’s not the only stunning scenery in store. There are around 50 sets involved in the production of season two, including the 30-acre forest behind the Kumeu Film Studio, Piha Beach, and the wild, black-sand Bethells Beach.

Waititi, who also executive produces the series, was part of the push to film season two in his native New Zealand. “Taika is an extraordinary talent and what’s really great about him with his international success is he’s remained very committed to New Zealand and very loyal to our industry,” says Annie Murray, the CEO of the New Zealand Film Commission. “The beauty of filming in New Zealand is that you can find incredible varied locations within a very short driving distance. [And] when you get to those locations you can turn your camera in any direction.’’

Rhys Darby as Stede Bonnet, filming at New Zealand’s Bethells Beach. COURTESY OF NICOLA DOVE/MAX.

The scope of the season is very evident back on set, as well. There’s a whole other pirate ship in addition to The Revenge, plus sets for a floating market, Stede’s cabin (empty when we visit), and the Republic of Pirates first glimpsed in season one. Behind the scenes it’s a maze of wardrobe, wig rooms, and dressing rooms. In another facility, props are stacked on shelves, ready to be taken away to storage as soon as filming wraps—vases, plates, antique furniture, and piles of mannequins replicating dead bodies which were used in one of the battle scenes.

Costume designer Gypsy Taylor joined the production this season and has designed hundreds of costumes, checking with everyone on set that day to make sure everything is in place before cameras roll. Taylor says each of the principals have six to eight looks in this season, and that every item—every leather belt, wig, bit of jewelry, even a mermaid tail—has been made by her 60-strong workshop. The costumes this season have a “Mad Max, ‘streets of New York’ feel,” says Taylor. “David Jenkins was keen to give the series a cool rock-and-roll vibe…so we had these rock-and-roll elements with an 18th-century twist.’’ As is evidenced in the image below, even Stede’s crew winds up with some unexpected new looks over the course of the season.

Wherever it is these Revenge crew members have found themselves, there’s something that surprised them. COURTESY OF NICOLA DOVE/MAX.

Two armies are part of the action in season two, all of them needing elaborate costumes—around 150 Chinese pirates and a fleet of 100 navy officers. Even the breeches are in studded black leather, and punkified. Says Taylor, “The theory behind their costumes is they would’ve stolen from other pirates…. Although our Wee John has started to become quite the seamstress, so he’s knitting this season.’’ True enough: Nairn is wearing what looks like a hand-knit sweater on set that day.

Wee John isn’t the only pirate getting into crafts. Nancy Hennah, who has managed the hair and makeup for both seasons, points to Blackbeard’s wig—made in London—and tattoos as Waititi works on set. With 14 tattoos on his right arm and 10 on the left, plus plenty of scars, he needs at least an hour in the makeup chair. “Taika wanted most of the tattoos to look like he’d done them himself,” Hennah says. “Like on slow days on the boat when there’s nothing much to do, they sit around and give each other tattoos.”

She gives a hint of a storm in one episode: “One of the hardest days here in makeup was when they were caught in a storm on the back of the boat. [The cast] were saturated for a whole day, which caused havoc with things like tattoos and hair, wigs and beards.’’

Taika Waititi as Blackbeard, who begins the season with a broken heart. COURTESY OF NICOLA DOVE/MAX.

By mid afternoon, Con O’Neill is taking a break in his trailer. He pulls his slim, leather trousered legs up to a corner seat. A candle blazes on the kitchen bench as the veteran actor talks about the physical endurance required during the shoot. “It’s been frantic,’’ he says. His signature gray hair barely moves, frozen by the team of hair stylists who arrived on set around sunrise. (All interviews with actors in this story took place before the SAG-AFTRA strike). 

Izzy “goes on a remarkable journey” this season, says O’Neill. “He understands what love is and whom he’s in love with.’’ On a series featuring a variety of joyful queer relationships—not just Stede and Blackbeard, but Black Pete and Lucius (Nathan Foad), Jim and Oluwande, and Spanish Jackie and her many husbands—Izzy’s unyieldingly straitlaced devotion makes him an odd man out. By the end of season one many fans speculated that Izzy was driven by something at the intersection of love and obsession. This season, according to O’Neill, Izzy gets even deeper into that dynamic. “Physically it’s been quite demanding, and also emotionally it’s been quite demanding to be playing a man enraged by unrequited love, who’s basically a hopeless romantic, and to be able to play all that and also remember that this is fundamentally a comedy.’’

Though the show is often warm and fuzzy when it comes to feelings—one of Stede’s mottos in season one is that when faced with challenges, “we talk it through as a crew”—Izzy represents the darker, more violent side of pirate life, which the show doesn’t shy away from either. “What I love about this show is it does allow itself to swing between the two,” O’Neill says. “We’re almost operatic in our darkness at times, and then we swing back to the sweetness of the simplicity of the love of our two guys. It’s been challenging just to get the tone right.”

“We’ve gone further this season than we did last season with those tones,” he continues. “So sometimes it’s quite interesting to remind yourself that you have to take your foot out of the tragedy—literally, your foot—and put it back into the comedy.”

With a season behind them to build the dynamics between the characters and the actors alike, on set there’s been “a lot more spontaneity and script revisions based on what’s happening day-to-day,” says Douaihy. “The cast are so comfortable with one another and their characters, that they move through it naturally.’’

Leslie Jones as Spanish Jackie and Taika Waititi as Ed a.k.a. Blackbeard. COURTESY OF NICOLA DOVE/MAX.

The way O’Neill puts it, they’ve also built trust with Jenkins, their showrunner, to follow some bigger swings. “I don’t think David Jenkins is ever going to follow an expected route. I’d hate to drive in a car with him.” Thinking of the fans who will greet the series when the show returns in October, O’Neill continues, “I think they’re going to appreciate what [Jenkins] wants. Season two does stick to the original premise that we created in season one, which is take it on to other levels.’’

One character leveling up in a major way this season is Jim, the quiet badass (there are knives involved) played by the nonbinary actor and activist Vico Ortiz. “Jim really evolves in season two,” they say. “They’re a bit more chatty and a bit more conversational…. Most of the first season you see Jim in disguise, hiding, but in this one you see them a bit more [thinking,] Oh, this is my chosen family, and I feel good. There’s a bit more zaniness and a bit more softness.’’

Like O’Neill and several other castmates, Oritz had attended their share of fan events by the time season two began filming, and the entire cast and crew returned to the high seas with a strong sense that their show had taken on a life of its own. “It’s so beautiful to see that people are finding community within the fan base. It’s about creating spaces where we feel safe and seen, and it’s so great to see that so many people watch the show and feel validated in their experiences, whatever that may be,” says Ortiz. “A lot of people that watch the show are like, “Yeah, I’m a guy and it’s good to see all these dudes being vulnerable.’ We can just shake up [ideas about gender].’’

Ruibo Qian joins the cast this season as Susan, a merchant with secrets of her own. COURTESY OF NICOLA DOVE/MAX.

Basch admits the fan following surprised some of the team, “but it made a lot of sense” too. After years of television shows and movies that built up the potential of queer romance only to stop short, Basch thinks the fervor for Our Flag Means Death “says that shows in the mainstream aren’t delivering that promise or that setup, and we have. That’s really why the fans have gone wild for it.”

That promise, it’s safe to say, is kept in season two, and then some. On set that day in December, for example, there was a major romantic moment between two key characters. But we’d risk Ed Teach’s wrath if we told you any more.

Source: Vanity Fair

[p1325]

My book collection so far

Jane Austen - Pride and Prejudice

Emily Bronte - Wuthering Heights

Louisa May Alcott - Little Women

Charlotte Bronte - Jane Eyre

Jane Austen - Sense and Sensibility

Edith Wharton - The Age Of Innocence

Jane Austen - Emma

Gustave Flaubert - Madame Bovary

Jane Austen - Northanger Abbey

Edith Wharton - The House of Mirth

Jane Austen - Persuasion

Louisa May Alcott - Good Wives

Nathaniel Hawthorne - The Scarlet Letter

Charlotte Bronte - The Professor

Leo Tolstoy - Anna Karenina (Part 1)

Leo Tolstoy - Anna Karenina (Part 2)

Jane Austen - Mansfield Park

Anne Bronte - Agnes Grey

Thomas Hardy - Far from The Madding Crowd

William Makepeace Thackeray - Vanity Fair (Part 1)

William Makepeace Thackeray - Vanity Fair (Part 2)

Pierre-Ambroise-François Choderlos de Laclos - Dangerous Liaisons

Alexandre Dumas fils - The Lady of the Camellias

Henry James - Washington Square

Louisa May Alcott - A Garland For Girls

Henry James - The Portrait of A Lady (Part 1)

Henry James - The Portrait of A Lady (Part 2)

Jane Austen - Lady Susan. The Watson. Sanditon

Anne Brontë - The Tenant of Wildfell Hall

Thomas Hardy - Tess of the D’Urbeville

Edith Wharton - The Mother’s Recompense

Daniel Defoe - Moll Flanders

Henry James - The Wings of the Dove

Edith Wharton - The Customs of the Country

Kate Chopin - The Awakening

Jane Austen - Juvenilia  

George Eliot - Middlemarch (Part 1)

George Eliot - Middlemarch (Part 2)  

George Sand - Nanon

Henry James - The Ambassadors

Elizabeth Gaskell - Cranford

Thomas Hardy - Under The Greenwood Tree

Edith Wharton - Summer

George Sand - Indiana

Henry James - The Bostonians

George Eliot - Silas Marner

Henry James - The Golden Bowl (Part 1)

Henry James - The Golden Bowl (Part 2)  

Edith Wharton - The Twilight Sleep

Emily Eden - The Semi-Attached Couple

Edith Wharton - The Glimpses of the Moon

Mary Elizabeth Braddon - Lady Audley’s Secret

George Eliot - The Mill on the Floss

Elizabeth Gaskell - Mary Barton 

Fanny Burney - Evelina 

George Sand - Little Fadette

Emily Eden - The Semi-detached House

Charlotte Brontë - Shirley I

Charlotte Brontë - Shirley II

Daniel Defoe - Lady Roxana

Theodor Fontane  - Effie Briest 

Edith Wharton - The Cliff

Thomas Hardy - Two on a Tower

Frances Hodgson Burnett - A Lady of Quality

Louisa May Alcott - Moods

Edith Nesbit - The Incomplete Amorist

Frances Trollope - The Widow Barnaby (Part 1)

[brokehorrorfan]

Butcher, Baker, Nightmare Maker will be released on 4K Ultra HD and Blu-ray on May 28 via Severin Films. The 1981 psychosexual horror film is also known as Night Warning.

William Asher (Bewitched) directs from a script by Steve Breimer, Alan Jay Glueckman, and Boon Collins. Jimmy McNichol, Susan Tyrrell, Bo Svenson, Bill Paxton, and Julia Duffy star.

Butcher, Baker, Nightmare Maker has been newly scanned in 4K from the original camera negative. It features reversible artwork. Special features are listed below.

Special features:

Audio commentary by actor Jimmy McNichol

Audio commentary by writer/producer Steven Breimer and writer Alan Jay Glueckman, moderated by Mondo Digital’s Nathaniel Thompson

Audio commentary by co-producer Eugene Mazzola

Interview with actor Bo Svenson

Interview with director of photography Robbie Greenberg

Interview with editor Ted Nicolaou

Interviews with actors Jimmy McNichol, Susan Tyrrell, and Steve Eastin, makeup artist Allan A. Apone, and writer Steve Breimer

Trailer

TV spot

Terror begins when a night of murder and bloodshed leads bigoted police detective Joe Carlson (Bo Svenson) to try to frame orphaned high school basketball player Billy Lynch (Jimmy McNichol). However, Billy’s aunt Cheryl (Susan Tyrrell) is the real knife-wielding culprit, and with Billy about to graduate, her twisted urge to keep him all to herself is about to erupt in a wave of carnage. No one is safe when an unstable lawman and a psychotic aunt converge in a shocking climax you’ll never forget!

Pre-order Butcher, Baker, Nightmare Maker from Amazon.

[funeral]

Susan Nathiel, Daughters of Madness

[yieldfruit]

A collection of quotes I originally shared on my blog the first month and year I began: October 2019–

I love you as the friend and intimate sharer of all my thoughts, in whose ear I can think aloud and upon whose bosom, in the day of trial and trouble, I will have a right to confide and to ask sympathy. – Nathaniel Dawson in a letter to Elodie Todd, 19th century

So the lesson was: stay away from bodies. Maybe find someone you could talk to.– Susan Sontag, from a journal entry 

And in that silence, what grace. – Camille Norton, from Corruption: Poems; “Savonarola’s Cape”

everything inside me came bruising to the surface. – Rachel McKibbens

How shall I hold back my soul from touching yours? – Rainer Maria Rilke, excerpt of “Love Song [Liebeslied]” Wie soll ich meine Seele halten, daß sie nicht an deine rührt?

My heart is with your heart at home; – Emily Brontë, Poems of Emily Brontë

The pain is what you make of it. You have to find something in it that yields. I understood my guiding imperative as: keep bleeding, but love. – Leslie Jamison

[serenpedac]

I was going through my Wayhaven folder and found this banner that I made for 'breath that passed from you to me', but never posted. Which is a shame, since I do really like it, so here it is anyway, together with a snippet from the fic under the cut.

The guests trickle out one by one as evening falls, leaving her with a moment of peace. There is still bookkeeping to be done and a dress that needs mending, but for now, she uses the momentary lull to lean on the countertop and close her eyes.

The murmur is interspersed from time to time with quiet laughter or a voice raised to emphasise a particular point. The rich aroma of coffee, warm and deep and slightly bitter, blends with the woodsmoke from the fire. In the background, there are traces of mud and tobacco, hints of the city and its people. It’s familiar but not quite as comforting as it used to be before her father—

A polite ‘ahem’ has her snap her eyes open. From across the bar, Mr Sewell is watching her, all others having left.

She takes a breath to centre herself before letting out a laugh. “You do have a habit of startling me, Mr Sewell.”

He tilts his head, a stray lock of dark hair falling across his cheek as he smiles. “Nathaniel. Nate, if you would?”

Nate. She bites the inside of her cheek to keep from trying how his name would sound, how it would feel, on her lips. “Susan.”

[creative-soul-22]

Narissa, Nathaniel & the real world - theory -

Around the time "Disenchanted" came out, I watched a video about Queen Narissa on Youtube and found this comment under the video:

And a comment replying to this comment really made me put on my thinking cap:

And although I liked the theory and it all made sense to me, as well it really hit me like a lightning when I rewatched "Enchanted" recently. The signs had all been there, I had noticed them but this time I really realized them. And I thought: "Yes, of course! It all makes so much sense!"

Now let's have a closer look on it since I love theories:

1. Cars

Not only does she know what a car is, she also knows she has to stop them with her magic to not be run over. You can see on the picture she uses the crosswalk.

2. Melodramatic

She knows words like "melodramatic" that Edward doesn't seem to know (yet this could also be him just never heard of that word)

3. Interaction with people

Narissa knows she has to keep things low-key. When Giselle passed out after taking a bite from her poisened apple, Narissa tells everyone Giselle just fainted and tries to calm people down because she knows that's the most effective tactic to get away. Also she knows that the people from New York don't know magic so saying that Giselle fainted is easier to explain than poisened apples.

4. A land without happy endings

Narissa knows exactly what she's doing when she pushes Giselle down that wishing well. She knows it's not just gonna take her out of Andalasia but it'll also slowly "defairytalize" Giselle when she stays in the real world.

5. The two baddies

Everyone in Andalasia is well-meaning, kindhearted and a ray of sunshine. Everyone except... Nathaniel and Narissa! This is of course also because they are the villains, but still...

Speaking of Nathaniel.

Well, I think it's because he is from the real world, too! Narissa either brang him along or he came searching for her. That's why he hangs around her so much and is so loyal to her. They're from the same world. Literally.

And because he's insanely in love with Narissa.

Wooh, a lot to read! Now I think I'll gonna leave it for now. Let me know what y'all think about it!

[inlovewithfictionalmensblog]

𝐘𝐎𝐔'𝐋𝐋 𝐁𝐄 𝐓𝐇𝐄 𝐅𝐈𝐑𝐒𝐓 𝐖𝐇𝐎 𝐄𝐕𝐄𝐑 𝐃𝐈𝐃  °.ཻུ۪›› Caspian X

Princess y/n had always been a bright, angelic woman. She was her kingdom's golden girl, loved by all. No one ever had a reason to hate y/n. She was too devine. But she was of fire, beautiful, warm but lethal. A curse she was gifted when she was born. She was unable to touch anyone. Though she never expected that the one she could touch would be her enemy.

Warnings : enemies to lovers. Angst, fluff, !intense shit. Reader has brown hair and amber eyes.

-—𝐓𝐇𝐄 𝐅𝐈𝐑𝐒𝐓 day y/n discovered she was unable to touch anyone was the day of her nameday. It had all happened so quickly. One moment, she just turned ten, and the next, she was sitting down with a body in front of her, shaking and whimpering in pain.

She screamed for soldiers that day, foe their help, and when one offered their hand to her, he screamed in pain. Nights she wondered what she had done to deserve such a terrible 'gift' . She couldn't hug her parents, touch any animals, touch anyone for that matter.

Her mother had been disappointed, putting things in y/ns head. How would she marry if she can't touch, how would she have an heir if she can't touch, how would anyone love her?

Her father hadn't mind. He was the only one out of her family to treat her the same. Touch wasn't the only way to express love. He often gave her gifts, blowing her kisses, he'd near her cheek to 'peck her cheek' only his lips never touched her.

She remembered the day the four kings and Queens of Narnia returned, her father fought in the war for the freedom of narnians and for the throne of Prince caspian.

Prince caspian had been a handsome man. He was polite, brave, and noble, like every prince. His deep brown black eyes, tanned skin, body, and telmarine accent. He was the most beautiful man she'd set eyes on. But while her eyes were on him, his were on susan pevensie.

Y/n couldn't deny Susan's beauty. Starting from her perfect pale skin, beautiful blue eyes and full lips. Not to mention, susan wasn't cursed.

She remembered the way he looked at her when he found out who she was. She remembered how peters/caspians' army stared at her, scared of her. They didn't go anywhere near her, Peter stopped Lucy from going anywhere near y/n .

Now presently, eight years later. Three years since the older pevensies left for good and another three since the younger ones did as well, two that y/n last saw caspian.

And suddenly y/ns father, Nathaniel announces that in a day, king caspian will visit. It didn't make y/n feel scared, not even nervous. Over the eight years, she changed, still unable to control her touch, she learned to use her 'gift.' .

One year ago her mother passed, it never saddened y/n, but her father was getting old and she was the only heir. Meaning sooner or later, y/n would be Queen, and she didn't have time to fear or to be weak and let others step on her.

"Princess." A fair tone said behind her, turning she saw her guard, Thomas. He gave her a simple and gentle but firm head bow. "The king requests for you to join him in the gardens."

Y/n smiles, walking away from the balcony and onto her way towards the door, Thomas looked at her, smiling. "Thank you, Thomas." She nods her head, and he returns it. Stepping aside to let her pass.

Walking through the halls, her heels echo. She lifts her gown to step down the stairs. One hand comes to her face to move a strand of hair away from her face. The sun hits her like a slap, and she smiles when she sees her father, looking at the tulips with squinted eyes, when his eyes met hers, his eyes softened.

"My sweet girl." His voice is gentle and sweet, he cocks his head towards Thomas, signaling for him to leave. "Father." Y/n smiles, making sure she's distant from him, he smiles at her. "Beautiful flowers aren't they?" He asks, suddenly.

Y/n looks at the many colorful tulips. They were beautiful. " Yes, Papa. Truly beautiful." She smiles, her finger touching only one petal, so delicately. She wasn't able to touch humans, but she was granted and able to touch un-living things, thanks to Aslan.

Her father sees and smiles, "dear," he says, "walk with me." He orders gently, to which she obeys. Walking alongside together, her father speaks. " Our Kingdom is the largest in the world. The second largest, seeing as Care Paravel had always been first before it turned into merely rocks and ruins."

Y/n nods , listening intently, her father's pauses with his words."and one day." He begins, "You will rule it all. But I am afraid you'd rule it alone." He seems hesitant, afraid. Y/n sighs, quietly.

"I don't expect you to want to marry, and I will not force you to." He says, looking at her. "You are a woman , free to do whatever you want. But I ask that you consider wanting to marry." Y/n looks away, staring at the fountains, the brught green grass, and at the town from a low view.

The kingdom, Therondia, was truly a big kingdom. Twice as beautiful as Cair Paravel. Green, the villages were beautiful, there were hundreds of lakes, and beaches, tunnels with secret lakes. Creatures that are only seen in Therondia.

It amazed y/n that one day, she'd be Queen of it.

"Who would want to marry me, father." She asks, not in a harsh tone or sad. In a normal tone, one she used all the time. Her father stared at her, shrugging. "You never know, dear. If I announced to all in Therondia , I'd need a good fit for you. I'm sure there'd be a line of thousands."

Y/n chuckles, shaking her head. She stared up ahead, seeing gardeners. Suddenly, the thought of her father leaving her hits her. Her father was getting older, hair growing white, wrinkles on his face.

"But I don't think you'll be leaving me soon, Papa." She says to him, stopping her tracks. She gives him a sad smile. He stopped to look at her also, she looked so much like her mother. Gifted with beautiful brown long curls, amber eyes, and fair skin.

"I'd never leave you, my dear."

After their walk, y/n entered her chamber, closing the door. Sitting by her fireplace, flipping through pages of a book. She tapped her fingers against the table beside her, although she wasn't paying attention to the letters/words. Tomorrow, someone she hasn't seen in two years, someone who hates her, would come and visit the kingdom.

She hadn't thought about it truly until recently. But now she couldn't push away the thought of seeing him once again. She shook her head, closing her book, opening her balcony door open, walking towards the edge, staring at the beautiful view of the seas , from the side she could hear faint music from the village.

She could see the lights, gleaming. She sighed, bringing her robe tighter on her. The air was fresh and smelled of sea salt, freshly cut grass, and smoke. Nothing smelled better. She closed her eyes, laying her head on the stone, sighing. She lifted her head , staring at her hands, only a knock on her door made her turn, the door opened revealing thomas.

"Your tea, princess." He bows, entering with a silver tray with tea. He places it on the table next to the fireplace, stands straight, and stares at her. The black silk satin robe, although her left shoulder was exposed, her nightgowns strap visible, her hair was down, and her skin looked warm. Thomas was stuck until she cleared her throat.

"Thank you, thomas." She smiles, "is that all?" She asks, keeping her distance. "No—no yes, yes. Rest well, Princess." He bows quickly, making an exit.

Y/n shakes her head, sitting down on her chair. Thomas valrik was a young man, younger than her. He was a dirty blond with green eyes, fit and strong. Which is why y/ns father had chosen him to be her guard. Y/n often found him a good friend, she trusted him with what she needed to let out. And her handmaiden , dayana even had a little crush on him.

She sips tea, relaxing. Tomorrow would be a new day, with visitors. She didn't know why, but she didn't want to be there when they arrived, she didn't want to have to see.. him. He often called her out with never being able to help, called her out on her curse, and he blamed her for hurting susan, which was an accident.

He was so.. obsessed with Susan, he never left her sight. What y/n did to susan was an accident, but caspian didn't see it like that. He was angry, unknowingly, he pushed her away from susan, angrily, and shielded susan.

She tried to explain what had happened but caspian never listened.

She was afraid, he would be worse.

----

Y/n stared at her reflection in the mirror. Sometimes, she didn't recognize herself. She looked different every day. Two years ago, she looked completely different.

Her handmaiden smiled at her, "You look beautiful, princess." Her handmaiden, dayana smiles, kindly. "I wish I could look like you, Your Grace."

Y/n turns, frowning. "You are beautiful, dayana. " y/n smiles, "you could win hundreds of hearts if only you were confident, my dear." Y/n says gently, her tone was angelic. The tone that a mother would use on a child. Dayana blushed. "Your grace—"

"I mean it, dayana. Never compare yourself to anyone." Y/n walked a little closer. Her finger didn't touch dayana, but softly pushed a small strand of hair from dayanas face, dayana didn't flinch. Dayana wasn't afraid of y/n. Dayana smiled.

"Thank you, Princess." Dayana said, smiling. She bowed and turned to leave the chamber, leaving y/n alone once again. Y/n sighed. She could see the large ship that belonged to caspian and his men. She wondered if, after all these years, he moved on from Susan.

Y/n looked away from the balcony, sighing with a pit in her stomach she couldn't fathom. She turned to her door, opened it, and closed it. She walked alone through the empty halls , her heels echoing in the hall, and she takes a shortcut, but it's cut off by her father.

" The king is on his way." Her father tells her, she nods, "yes," and he nods as well, " So where do you think you're going?" He asks, and she laughs nervously.

"To get some air." She lies.

He doesn't believe her. "Right. There is plenty of air inside as well, no?" He questioned, looking around the empty hall. She smiles , nodding once again. "Yes."

"Hmm, come. We must be there when King Caspian arrives."

Y/n sighs, huffing. She takes a deep breath and follows her father. He walks towards the throne room, where there stood in the center, the large stoned throne, silver diamond embroidered, shaved. King Nathaniel sat calmly and patiently while y/n stood beside him with her guard behind her, Grimsley by her father's side.

Y/n shifted from one foot to another, toying with her fingers. "Relax, princess." Thomas says behind her, whispering so only she can hear. She nods, swallowing. Footsteps approach and the doors open, Lord drinian steps first, then reepicheep the noble and brave rat—knight, she smiles when she sees reep and trumpkin, though she hides it. Her head is high, but they stare at her.

Then, here he came. Looking as different as before. He no longer had long hair but had cut it short, face was full of facial hair but not too much, it looked good, he was dressed in fine black clothes, black boots, with peter pevensie's sword hanging on his hip.

King Nathaniel stands, "King Caspian," he bows his head. Caspian hasn't seen y/n just yet, which she is thankful for. "We welcome you to our home," the king says, giving a warming welcome to the telmarine king.

"We are most grateful, You're grace." Caspian bows , y/n stares at him, but looks away shortly, not wanting to be caught. Her hands are locked in front of her, her chin high, and she avoided eye contact with any of her old friends.

Her father opened his mouth to speak of something, his voice echoing across the halls, reep and trumpkin stepping aside, lord drinian standing just beside caspian as always.

"My daughter and I hope your stay is as comfortable as you deserve." Her father says, smiling towards y/n, caspian looks at her, his fierce eyes trailing her form, she looked at him, bowing , "King caspian," She avoids his gaze, when she's straight he bows his head as well, "Princess y/n."

His tone was cold as usual, his telmarine accent gone, now replaced with an English strong and fierce accent. His voice was deeper. But then again, he was older.

She didn't say anything afterward, reepicheep looked at her, looking excited. She smiled softly at him, nodding to him as well.

When their welcome was over, y/n rushed out the throne room, thomas following quietly. She didn't turn to look at caspian, but she could feel his intense stare , following her as she walked out.

She let out a breath she didn't know she held, her back against a wall when she saw she was alone. Thomas gave her a look, "I see the tension still continues." He says, and she nods , chuckling.

"He hates me." She whispers, shaking her head. Thomas frowns. "I don't see how anyone could hate you, princess. You are kind."

Y/n shrugs, beginning to walk. Thomas never walked beside her, only ever walked behind her. Because that was his job as her guard. "He's hated me since before he met eighteen years ago." Y/ns begins, "but I suppose he only despised me when I accidentally, but to him, purposely hurt his precious susan." Y/n seemed sarcastic. She mocked Susan's name. Thomas seemed amused.

"It seems to me he's misunderstood you." Thomas says and y/n squeals. "EXACTLY!" She whispers yells. " The man only met me within 5 minutes and decided I'd be his worst enemy."

After walking, she made it to the garden and spent the rest of her day there.

----

Y/n knew she shouldn't be up late, but she couldn't sleep. Something kept her awake.

She walked alone at night with a lantern in her hand, making her way towards the library that truly belonged to her. She was the only one who read aside from her mother, who was.. gone now.

She opened the large door to the library and quickly closed it. The library was large, filled with problems, millions of books, a large and long window , showing a beautiful view of the moon and stars. She places the lantern down and goes over a couple of books, finding one that would be interesting for her.

"Not that one." She whispered to herself, as quiet as she could.

She was distracted with her book. She failed to realize she wasn't alone, and someone was watching her, both amused and slightly confused.

She dropped a book, hissing as the head of it hit Her toes. "Ow!" She hisses, desperately trying to be quiet. The library was incredibly both quiet and echoey. One sound, and it would echo loud enough for someone who coincidentally passed by to hear.

She bent to get the book, "Shouldn't you be asleep?" A voice behind her causes her to flinch and gasp. Turning she faces, standing in front of caspian who was dressed in other but a white button up, pants and his black boots. His hair was messy, and he looked tired.

"I-" She stammered, "I couldn't sleep." She said, then frowned. "Why are you here?" She asks suddenly. Caspian clicks his tongue, "it's a library, is it not? What other reason is there to be in a library if not to read?"

She mentally rolls her eyes, but instead, she hums. Not replying. She turns, grabbing a book, and wants to make a leave when his voice stops her. " You've changed." He says, his eyes are on the book in front of him for a moment, then he places it on a counter and looks at her, hands going on his pockets. Even from a distance, he was still very much taller than her.

"No," she shakes her head, "I haven't. I'm still the same." She lies. She did change. She'd like to believe. And he clearly sees it, too. He hums, he doesn't smile or anything. "But you have. Changed, of course. " he tells her again, he doesn't move.

His eyes are hers, waiting for her to reply. To say something. To bite back, but she didn't. She never did. Whenever caspian told her something, whether it was mean.. or mean. She'd never say anything back.

She shrugged. "Goodnight, Your grace."

-----

"I'm so glad to see you again, princess." Reepicheep says, biting into a block of cheese, cherishing the flavors.

Y/n smiles, "I'm glad to see you too, reep. Amazing how long it's been and nothings changed of you."

Reepicheep makes a 'oh stop' noise, waving his hand and chuckling. Y/n smiles, shaking her head while eating her breakfast. Her father is at the end of the dining table, caspian on the other end, y/n sat in the middle, reepicheep next to her, trumpkin in front and lord drinian next to caspian.

Y/n stood up, dusting herself off. "I'm off to the gardens father." Y/n says, caspian turns to look at her, her father nods. "So soon, my dear?" He asks, drinking his wine.

Y/n nods. "I'll be safe—"

"Yes, you will. Have Thomas be with you."

Y/n stays silent, only nods and leaves the wrong. Caspian watches her walk away and leave the room, reepicheep groans at his food, when capsian speaks.

"Thomas?"

The king looks at caspian, "Yes, her guard." He bites a grape. " Since the death of Queen Alysanne, I've been quite paranoid. I ordered for her to have a guard to protect her."

"I thought she was well trained in combat. No one would dare harm her. They can't to–" caspian stopped himself from finishing his sentence , ye coughs. "I see."

The king stares at caspian, "I can assure you your grace. My daughter has learned to defend herself, but as a father, I have my fears. Surely when you become a father, you will understand."

Caspian only nods but stays silent.

----

"He's so... irritating. He was in my library, thomas. my library." Y/n groans, walking through the gardens of roses.

Thomas is behind her, listening to her trantrums. Amused and finding it hard to keep on a laugh. "He gave me that stupid look, too."

"Look?" Thomas says, raising a brow. "Should I ask."

"Dont." Y/n warns.

Thomas puts his hands up in defense, smiling and shaking his head. Y/n continues to walk, collecting her own bouquet of flowers . "He frustrates me."

"I can see." Thomas says back, earning a glare from y/n. Thomas snorts out quietly.

----‐

Days passes, y/n had no idea why caspian was there. Why was he in her kingdom, she didn't know.

Days passed , and she avoided him every time. He looked at her often, sometimes wheen she caught him , he wouldn't look away. He sometimes studied her.

Until one day—night. Y/n got in a fight with her father. The two disagreed, and she stormed off. No one knew where to, but they knew she ran off to the forest.

Dayana tried to run after her, but even y/n was too fast for her to keep up.

"Where is she?" King Nathaniel shouts, the staff all flinch. Caspian stares with his arms crossed, he turns to Thomas, Thomas looks devastated and for some reason, caspian is glad.

Caspian grabs Thomas by the collar, leading him to a different room. " Where is she." Caspian nearly growls. Thomas doesn't flinch, although he should.

"Anwser me." Caspian says dangerously. " You are her guard. You know where she hides." Thomas looks at caspian and frowns.

"And you care why?" Thomas bites. "All you've been is cold towards her. "

Caspian huffs. " i don't care." He shrugs. "But she's the kings daughter. And if she dies, you'll be the one suffering the consequences." Thomas shakes his head.

After a moment of silence, thomas gives in. Telling caspian where y/n usually hides, a place no one knew about. And in an instant, caspian flees. Thomas watches, "Don't care? Rubbish." He says to himself.

----

Y/n is in the middle of the forest. It's dark, and she can't see. She wants to turn and return to the castle, but she doesn't want to face her father.

She's in complete silence , standing in the middle of a forest, and she's alone. She cursed herself, turning around, but she hears a crack, making her stop. Another crack followed.

"Hello?" Her voice isn't shaking. She's curious, but she regrets that she didn't bring a weapon with her. Though, she didn't really need one.

"Hello." A deep voice behind her approaches. She turns and sees a man, she can't see his face but he's wearing a cloak. "Oh." She whispers.

"Oh?"

"Sorry to... disturb. I was just leaving." She hesitates. The man in the cloak tilts his head. "But you just arrived. You couldn't possibly be leaving already?"

Y/n freezes, the man is scary. "I'm sorry , truly! But my fathe—"

"The king can wait." The man says quickly. Y/n doesn't day anything, one step forward, and she takes one back.

"Sir." She whispers. " I need to go home."

"Home?" He repeats. "I don't have a home. What's it like." He says. He keeps titling his head from left to right. His voice gets deeper and shallower.

"It... it's " the man takes wha looks like a dagger from his pocket, and y/n pretends she doesn't see.

"Uh huh?"

Y/n makes no noise and doesn't speak. She's quiet for a long time. "You do not want to get near me.""

The man chuckles. "Oh but I do. I haven't felt someone's touch in a very long time. I get lonely."

Y/ns breathe shudders. "You do not want to touch me." Is what she wants to say. But instead, she says quiet. The man in the cloak circles around her, though she still can't see his face.

He gets closer til he's inches away from her. She doesn't push him away. Suddenly, everything was done. Sudden, his hand grabbed her neck, throwing her to the ground with him on top of her. Her hand gripped his wrist, and immediately, he screamed in agony.

The burning desire, she could feel her veins pop out. She could feel her blood pumping, her heartbeat. She felt hungry for more. He screamed and screamed, shaking, crying, and sobbing. Yet the more he was dying thr weaker she seemed to get.

"Let go!" He screams. "Let go!" He screams repeatedly. But she did. She had let go a long time ago.

She was breathing heavily, trying to stand, trying to waddle her way closer to the castle. Her vision is blurry. She can't feel her legs. For a moment, she could hear faint screams from someone else before everything went black.

-----

Y/n opened her eyes slowly, blinking slowly. She can feel pain on her neck and on her head. She groans, not realizing she wasn't alone.

She expected her father or Thomas, maybe even dayana. But she never expected caspian sitting and watching her.

"Who did this to you." Is all he says. He stares at her neck, not looking away from him. "Who?" He asks again. But she doesn't reply.

"I will search this entire kingdom if I have to. Don't tempt me." He finally looks at her. She's confused.

"How did I end up here?" She asks, staring at her surroundings. Who brought her here and how.

He shrugs. "I found you in time. You were already on the ground, unconscious." He says to her. He hesitates for a moment. She raises a brow, slightly.

"How did you bring me here?" She asks again, slowly. He doesn't reply, he stares but he doesn't reply.

"Did you touch me?"

"I didn't have a choice. You were unconscious." He tells her. Y/n stares at him , eyes widened. "I hurt you?" She whispers, staring for injuries but he looked fine.

"No." He shakes his head.

"So how did you touch me?" She asks, her voice louder. He swallows, gets up from the chair and sits on the bed. Not too close to her.

"Do you remember when you touched susan?" He asks her, the memory replays on her head. She nods, brows narrowed down. "I pushed you away." He tells her, "and I didn't feel pain. I pushed you from your shoulder, I felt your skin under mine. But I didn't feel pain. And I wondered—" He pauses to lick his lips. "Susan was in tears from a mere touch from you, an injury that scarred on her arm, and yet your touch never affected me."

Y/n is listening, but she can't believe it—him.

"I thought it was because I touched you so quickly and pulled away, but a couple nights ago." He hesitates. "You fell asleep in the library, and I couldn't help it." He stops. "I touched your face. It was killing me... I needed to know. And... it didn't hurt me."

Nothing makes sense anymore. Y/n is lost for words. She can't understand everything anymore.

"And when I saw you fall, your head was bleeding. I didn't check to see if there was anyone else. I needed to take you to safety. I brought you before anyone could see me." Caspian says, his eyes were deep and staring into hers.

"I can touch you?" She whispers and he nods. "Only you?"

Caspian seems hesitant but nods. " yes."

"Oh."

-------

Y/n sat in the library. A book In her hand, she's focused when the doors open and there is caspian. Dressed in a black robe, he's frozen on the spot.

Y/n paused. She avoided him since the accident. Not knowing or wanting to see or talk to him, afraid of the subject.

"I apologize—I didn't know you'd be--"

"It's okay." She says quickly. Offering him a kind smile. "The library is for all. Please.." She goes back to her book, and he nods.

After minutes of silence, he looks at her. "Couldn't sleep?" He asks, wanting to make conversation. She shakes her head, not looking at him.

"Me neither." He whispers.

Y/n sighs " it scares me to sleep." She says, admitting. He stares at her. " why is that?" He asks.

She shrugs. "When you sleep... you never know what's happening in the world. When you sleep, you're in a void of darkness. Since the night my mother was killed, I haven't been able to peacefully sleep without feeling like something will happen to me or to my father." She confesses , she closes her book, and stares up at him, but he's already staring at her.

"I suppose that is why I found you sleeping here? In the daylight."

Y/n smiles, nodding.

He hums, watching her stand. She places the book on the counter, bowing her head as she nears him.

"Goodnight 𝘊𝘢𝘴𝘱𝘪𝘢𝘯."

Caspian watches her leave the room, passing him he deeply inhales. The smell of lilies and soap brings him to heaven. He closes his eyes, savoring the smell.

"Goodnight, Y/n."

-------

Idk if it gave enemies to lovers.... I TRIED YALL.

Part 2???