#taehyung idol au

[7ndipity]

Accidental Announcement

Taehyung x Idol Reader

Summary: You and Tae’s relationship is revealed to his members in an unplanned, slightly awkward way.

Word Count: 1.2k

Warnings: suggestive, like one swear, Tae refers to reader as his girlfriend,

A/N: Thanks to the lovely anons who sent both of these requests! I decided to combine them into the same piece, I hope that’s okay. Idk why, but it’s funny to me that I went from not really knowing much about Idol AUs, to having several ongoing series’ of them on this blog!

Masterlist

Requests are open

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The backstage area of the music show was always so crowded and noisy that it made it easy for Tae to slip up beside you without anyone really paying attention, catching your hand in his before leaning in closer than nessary to mumble lowly in your ear.

“I’ve got a room to myself tonight, do you want to come over?”

“What exactly are you suggesting?” You asked, casting a sidelong glance at him, a smirk playing at the corners of your mouth.

“Whatever you want.” He replied, slipping a keycard into your hand smoothly before going back to find his members.

You were a bit surprised by his brazeness of the action, the past few weeks apart while traveling with your respective groups having apparently made him a little more needy than usual, though you couldn’t say you minded.

It wasn’t uncommon for you and Tae to slip off to each others rooms when you found out you were staying at the same hotel, but it was usually brief since there was the constant risk of one of the members walking in on you, due to having to share rooms all the time. But having a solo room meant there was no such threat for once.

You slipped down to his room after he texted that the coast was clear, spending a relatively quiet evening together before getting ready for bed, borrowing one of his t-shirts to sleep in, having conveniently ‘forgotten’ to bring your own pj’s with you.

As you wandered back out of the bathroom, you noticed Tae very engrosed in whatever it was that he was watching on his phone.

Out of curiosity, you snuck up behind him and peeked over his shoulder to catch a glimpse at his phone, surprised to see yourself, winking at the camera as you danced earlier that night during the music show.

“Are you watching fan edits of me?!” You squealed, making him jump and drop his phone, which you were quick to snatch up to get a better look.

“Ya! That was just in my recomendations! Give it back!” He jumped to his feet, chasing you round the bed, but you were too quick, darting across the mattress to save yourself from a full body tackle. You tried to make a dash for the bathroom, but were to slow, as he managed to grab hold of your arm and spin you so you were pinned between him and the front door.

“Give me that!” He giggled breathlessly as he wrangled his phone out of your grip.

“I can’t believe it, you’re such a fanboy!” You laughed, equally out breath, choosing to wrap your arms around his neck both for support and to pull him down to your eye level.

“Only because you’re so cute.” He cooed, catching your lips in a teasing kiss, trailing his hands up your sides slowly and making you squirm against him, momentarily lost in the feel of each other that you didn’t hear the sound of his door knob turning.

“Taehyung, do you know where- Yi-ash!” Before either of you could react, the door had opened, resulting in you and Tae falling out into the hallway, landing squarely at Jin’s feet in pile of limbs.

For a moment, you all froze, staring wide-eyed at each other in shock.

“Hyung, I-” Tae started.

“What was tha- whoa.” The door to the room next to Tae’s opened, revealing Jungkook and Jimin now peering out, equally shocked. “Y/n?”

“Hi, guys.” You said awkwardly, hyper aware of how compromising your current position looked. “Uh, Tae, can I get up?” You whispered, snapping you boyfriend out of his daze.

“Yeah, sorry!”

“What’s going on?” Jin asked as Tae scrambled to his feet and helped you up.

“Nothing! We were just-”

“Does Namjoon know about this?” Jungkook asked.

“Know about what?”

“Oh, for shit’s sake!” Tae whipped around to face the leader and Hobi, who had just exited the elevator, trying to hide you behind his back, as if that was going to help anything at this point.

“What is with all the noise?” Yoongi opened his door, blinking tiredly at the sight of everyone standing in the hall for several long seconds before wordlessly closing the door again, deciding against involving himself in whatever scene was unfolding right now.

“What’s going on?” Joon asked, glancing around at his members, eyes widening slightly as he spotted you, wearing one of Tae’s t-shirts and wishing to dissolve into the wallpaper. “Y/n?-”

“Y/n’s my girlfriend.” Tae blurted out loudly, causing everyone’s attention to whip to him, including yours. ”We’re dating, but I haven’t told the company yet.”

There was another pause as that information sank in, before Junkook spoke again, breaking the silence.

“Way to go, hyung.” He grinned at you and Tae.

“Yeah, good for you guys.” Jimin agreed, shooting you both a thumbs up.

“You’re not mad?” Tae asked, glancing at everyone nervously.

“Why would we be mad? So long as you’re careful, It’s your life.” Hobi said encourangingly.

“Yeah, I mean, I would’ve rather not have found out by catching you two doing that-” Jin said.

“We weren’t doing anything!” Tae exclaimed.

“Tell that to the hickey on you neck.” Jimin chirpped, dissolving into giggles as Tae clapped a hand to his neck in alarm.

“Okay, um, we can talk about this later, can everyone just please go back to your rooms before one of the staff shows up?” Joon said quickly, herding the two younger members back into their room.

“Be safe, you two!” Jungkook called, closing the door before Tae could snap back at him.

“Thank you, hyung.” Tae said to Namjoon.

“Don’t worry about it, man, we’ll talk later.” Joon replied, patting Tae on the shoulder before nodding to you. “Sorry about that.”

“It’s okay.” You said, catching Tae’s hand before making your way back to his room.

“Oh, hyung?” Tae leaned back out into the hall to address Jin. “What was it you came to ask me?”

The eldest member blinked for a moment before shaking his head. “I don’t even remember.”

Tae nodded. “Alright then, goodnight.” He closed the door firmly, making sure both locks were engaged before slumping against it with a groan.

“Well, that’s not how I planned for that to go.” He said, rubbing his face tiredly.

“What? Telling you bandmates about us, or asking me to be your girlfriend?” You asked, leaning against the dresser as you studied him.

“Both.” He admitted, looking at you apologetically. “I am so, so sorry.”

You shrugged. “At least it was just them and not your manager.”

He nodded before slowly straightening and coming to stand in front of you. “Will you let me fix one of my missteps from tonight?”

“Depends which one it is.” You said, smirking up at him.

“Will you be my girlfriend?” He asked you, staring down at you solomly.

“Hmm.” You pretended to mull it over. “I guess.”

“You guess?!” He balked, making you laugh.

“Yes, you goof, I will.” You relented, wraping your arms around his neck to pull him into a kiss.

“Good, I don’t think my heart could take any more surprises tonight.” He mumbled against your mouth.

“Plus, the guys would be upset.”

“The guys?” He raised a brow at you before hoisting you up and dropping you on the bed. “I don’t want to hear about ‘the guys’ again for the rest of the night.” He grumbled, climbing to hover over you.

“Are you possesive now?” You asked, grinning up at him.

“You’re gonna find out.”

[socksjinie]

wonder: chapter 03 | bts

synopsis. she had forgotten all about her favorite idols from her teenage years, but a reminder came to her through email format. the content of it? simple: working with the idols themselves — bts. how wonderful could that be?

✿ main chapters of the wonder drabbles; read them here

pairing. bts x oc's

genre. idol au + fluff + slice of life + smut

word count. 5008

warnings. heartbreaking conversations and some bickering hihi

“So, speaking of Gucci…” Carolina started, and Taehyung’s heart did a loop inside his ribcage, catching his attention immediately. “I was thinking. What if our wardrobe production had that vintage feel to it?” She smiled widely at him. 

“Hm, sure?” But he sounded a bit unsure. “Yeah, why not!” 

“I’m going to contact Deo then. If she’s the director of the store here, I’m sure she could help.” She mused, too caught up on the production of the video to notice how the boy before her kept fidgeting on his chair. “Plus it would be great to have a feature like that… Maybe I can contact a friend from Louis Vuitton too.” 

“I love both brands so.” Taehyung chugged down his wine, eyes lost on the scenery unfolded to him behind Carolina’s shoulder. 

Their dinner resumed to a lighter atmosphere once he changed the subject. They discussed excitedly about movies and old cinema crushes, which made Carolina laugh the entire night and take Taehyung by surprise because they had so much in common. They were both social people, and had a million different contacts — especially in their line of work — but surprisingly enough, they found some kind of bliss to be able to finally talk and share thoughts with someone that would understand them perfectly. 

It was almost eleven when they left the restaurant. Carolina had called a cab, and Taehyung offered to wait alongside her once his manager arrived. 

“Are you sure you don’t need a ride home?” He insisted once again. 

“I’m sure! I live in the complete opposite way from where you said you were going. Plus I already called for it! But thank you for offering” She chuckled and he opened a boxy smile. 

The duo continued talking and laughing, and soon her ride home arrived. Taehyung whispered something to his manager once Carolina entered the cab, and she realized a bit after accommodating herself better on the back seat bench, that he was asking the driver to drop her home safely. 

The ride home was a mix of lost thoughts while appreciating the lights passing through her window and little moments of dozing off. The girl only realized she had arrived after hearing the driver ask her if everything was alright and if she needed help. She thanked him kindly, and overly giggly — that was at the expense of the excellent wine they had over dinner — getting out of the vehicle and entering her building. 

Opening the door to her apartment, she kicked her shoes to the side and closed it behind her. She disposed of her bag on the island of her open space kitchen and went to sit on the couch. Fifteen minutes were spent there, looking at nowhere, before sighing and lighting up the chandelier next to the furniture, giving some light to the room. 

Supporting her legs on the coffee table, she grabbed the notebook she had previously forgotten on the sofa and started to write down some things she found important for the building of the highlight reel, such as the brands she could work for and the wardrobe part in general. 

Carolina had a lot of things written down by the time her phone buzzed by her side. 

Leaving their chatroom, she noticed there was another unseen text, this time from an unknown number. 

It made her chuckle fondly when she read the first line. The number was instantly saved before she replied. 

After that, she made a mental note to maybe meet Yoongi after lunch, since she had some location details to discuss with the production team. The girl put her phone aside, to continue rummaging through her notes, but it buzzed once more, interrupting her. 

She couldn’t help but smile. The feeling of meeting someone new, someone she liked so much and so quickly — instantly even — spreading through her whole body. 

It felt great to be understood. Especially because she had felt, for so long, so odd and out of the box through everyone’s eyes. 

After a long yawning, she closed her notebook, and walked toward her bedroom, intending on charging her phone. The device was left on her bedside table, and in the process of stripping off to take a quick shower before going to bed, she started thinking about the highlight reel once more. 

The boys’ requests and ideas popped into her head, one by one, and a first outline started to form. Inspired by an old book she adored as a child, the concept started to gain life and her mind elaborated a quick draft. 

She took her shower with the storyline in mind, musing over the fact she would have to find someone to be the central piece of the scenes. And it couldn’t be any of the boys. A girl would be ideal, she could represent the army presence too. 

The shower was turned off. Wrapping herself in a towel after wiping off the remaining water droplets on her body, she went eagerly towards her phone. 

“It’s not that late there I think…” Carolina thought out loud, checking the clock on her phone that marked 3 am. 

She decided to give it a shot. Sarah was never the type to go to bed early, she would often say she had been analyzing her pieces for the journal she worked for late at night. And although it had been a while since Carolina last spoke to her, they still kept in touch and considered themselves to be very close. 

“And here I was thinking my night couldn’t get any better,” She heard Sarah greet her through the other side of the line, voice filled with excitement. 

Carolina was quick to explain the entire situation after catching up with her friend. She went step by step, starting from the day she received the email from HYBE’s representatives to all the meetings she had to have. She knew Sarah was a busy person, and it was rather late, she wouldn’t want to disturb her work process. She also needed sleep if she didn’t want to arrive at HYBE the next day with eyebags. 

And although the conversation was way shorter than it was supposed to be, Sarah didn’t even think twice before saying yes, and Carolina went to bed that night feeling confident and overly joyful about her new project. 

Her beauty sleep didn’t last long, however. An annoying noise woke her up. After searching the bed for the device with one eye open and the other still closed, she confirmed what she suspected. It was still too early. Six thirty-eight, it showed on the clock. She proceeded to notice Sarah’s name on the screen and picked it up. 

“What day is it again?!” Was the first thing that Sarah questioned on the other side of the phone, making Carolina sigh deeply. Half of her was still asleep. 

“Wait.” Her voice sounded raspy, and her movements felt slow. She marched towards her kitchen, remembering her bag was still on the kitchen island, to pick up her agenda. Flicking through the pages, she voiced the dates of the filming to her friend. 

“Crap! I can’t be there on time, Carol.” She heard Sarah sigh frustrated. “I have this piece I’m building to air this month, I still need to lead the interviews…” 

“Fuck.” 

“But you know what? You should try Harin? Maybe she’s available!” Sarah suggested, now sounding more excited to be able to offer a solution to her friend. 

“I’ll try that. And don’t worry, as soon as the project is done, I’ll throw a party and you’ll be more than invited!” Carolina comforted the girl, knowing she probably said yes without much reasoning because one—it was a project with BTS, and two—to help a friend. A big yawn followed right after. “It’ll be a group reunion if you manage to come,” 

“What do you mean group reunion?”

“You won’t even believe this,” She started chuckling. “But I ran over Deo yesterday in a restaurant.” She herself wasn’t believing the words leaving her mouth. 

“Shut up. No way!” 

“Yup. I still can’t believe it myself,” She heard Sarah squeal on the other side making her laugh. “You have to come and see for yourself if you think it’s a doppelgänger!” 

The girls continued their talk excitedly, planning a big reunion until Sarah saw the hours and stated she really needed to go. 

Carolina thought about calling Harin, but since it was still too early, she only texted the girl, asking her to give her a call once she could, and then went back to dreamland. 

A few days went by and still nothing of Harin. Not even a response. The messages weren’t going through. But that often happened with the girl in question, so Carolina didn’t find it strange. She just opted to change the order of the recording instead to give Harin more time. So as an alternative to Jin being the first — the one with the actual time in the presence of the girl — she was going to start with Jungkook. 

His first scene would be a dreamy one, inspired by everything that hit close to Carolina’s childhood memories and the wonderland worlds she used to read in books. She even allocated an old and abandoned amusement park for it. 

As scripted, she would self film Jungkook’s back, as he had his hand on hers leading her to the park entrance. It was supposed to be Harin on duty, but she could afford to be a hand substitute for a firsthand narrative. 

The boy was already dressed — he was wearing Luis Vuitton from head to toe, although the others had a mix between that and Gucci — and everything seemed to be going alright. But as Carolina was making the final adjustments so she could self-record the scene, a buzz on the set started to spread. 

The first two takes were seemingly good. Jungkook seemed a bit nervous to have to take her hand and put a host act for her like he was Peter Pan showing the way to Neverland. Which was indeed what inspired Carolina to make this highlight reel. BTS would be playing the part of the infamously lost boys. 

She was discussing with an attentive Jungkook how the scene had to proceed when a girl interrupted them. 

“This hairstyle is getting all messy in the recording, Kookie” And as her hands tried to reach for his messy bangs Carolina’s eyes went straight to her figure in questioning. 

She wasn’t part of the makeup team or a stylist. And Carolina knew that because she had been in touch with each and every one of them to make this whole production come to life. 

“It’s in that awkward phase again where it starts to grow,” Jungkook explained himself with a playful smile but he was nervously nibbling on his lip piercing while eyeing Carolina. 

She was known for having a very sincere face and expressions. There wasn’t much she could hide, her face did all the work. And he was able to sense that. 

“I think it’s cute,” The shorter girl chuckled and Carolina had to refrain from being rude. 

It wasn't that she didn’t like people on set every time she worked, she was very much ok with that or even strangers being around. She liked meeting new people and to talk while doing stuff. But she also praised the fact those same people could discern the time to intervein on her job or not. 

And now just wasn’t the time. 

“I’ll go set up the camera again while you resume your chat,” she started, getting out of Jungkook’s hold on her hand that she didn’t even realize they were still intertwined until then. “And please don’t touch his hair.” She warned the girl, walking away and not bothering to introduce herself since the shorter one didn’t feel the need to. 

After that, the whole mood was corrupted. 

The crew started gossiping incessantly, probably noticing the bad vibe, and that was causing Carolina to get a bad vibe and a really bad impression of everything. And deep down she knew it wasn’t Jungkook’s fault, he seemed to be more than professional in everything he did, but the situation was annoying her so much that she couldn’t help but get a little annoyed with him too. She didn’t show it, of course, she too knew how to put her professionalism first, but her whole image of him got a bit tainted. 

She was analyzing the rough sketches of the scene in her journal when Deo approached her. 

“Word around is that girl over there is one of the backup dancers,” and seeing Carolina was still focused on the papers before her, Deo continued. “Which is odd, because this reel doesn’t have any dance part…” 

“Mhm”

“Are you seriously not gossiping about this with me?” Deo questioned, eyes on Jungkook and the dancer far ahead. 

“There’s not much to gossip about.” 

“As if! I mean–Who is she?” Deo crossed her arms now looking at her friend who was about to drink a cup of coffee. “Don’t you dare,” She warned, taking the cup out of Carolina’s hand before she could do so. “I won’t deal with that monster today, I have BTS to dress up.” 

Carolina sighed reluctantly but let the caffeine go. She really couldn’t hold her coffee well. “It got pretty clear to me she is Jungkook’s love interest,” She commented after looking at the duo briefly and Deo had to look at them both again. Eyes narrowed once the dancer scootched over to Jungkook to tell him something. 

“No way.”

And Carolina chuckled at her friend’s disbelief. 

“No, there’s no way…” Deo continued and then came to a pause. She looked at them again. “She’s definitely younger than him.” 

“Uhmhum” Carolina agreed. 

“I can’t believe he actually brought his girlfriend to set! And let her interrupt the footage!” 

A bit far off from where they were under an open tent to block the sun, Jungkook and Nain — the dancer — were talking. Well, he was mostly with his hands stuffed in the pockets of his trousers listening to her talk. From time to time he would glance over where Carolina was, trying to understand if she got suddenly so uptight because he had done something wrong. 

“I overheard one of you guy’s managers saying he was going to try his shot with her,” Nain said looking over at Carolina and suddenly Jungkook got alert. 

“What?”

“It’s been the talk of the staff,” she chuckled. “Two of the crewmates already asked for her number. Jisoo and that other one, what’s he called?”

“And she gave it to them?” He asked ignoring her train of thoughts completely. 

“I didn’t ask,” she laughed again. “And why didn’t you answer me last night? I had to come all the way here to see you!” 

“I had a thing to do,” He dismissed looking over at Carolina again. 

When the recording resumed, Nain went to sit by where the other staff was, including Deo. And this time the scenes were moving faster. Carolina would only say something to Jungkook if absolutely needed. The light chatter they were having in the first scene was gone and with it Jungkook’s sense of ease. Still, he was doing a fantastical job. 

But again, their moment of feigning peace didn’t last long. As they moved to use the cameraman's work instead of Carolina’s perspective and the girl stood close by serving as the director, her phone started buzzing in her jeans back pocket.

Jungkook was filming a running scene, so she took the time to go answer the phone once she saw Harin’s name on the screen.

“Let’s take five after he finishes that one,” she mouthed to the cameraman and immediately picked up the phone, walking away to a more silent area. 

“Harin!” She greets excited. “So what? Now that you’re a flight attendant you don’t have time for your friends? I texted you two days ago!” She teases playfully. 

She then begins to explain to Harin that she was directing a video for a client and that she was in search of a girl that could fill the part, without giving her the details for whom the video was. Carolina filled her in on the schedules, and how hurried everything had been. She really needed to start shooting Jin next week, otherwise, the locations she had allocated would be lost, and consequently more money for the budget she would have to arrange. 

Thankfully for her, Harin noted she would be landing in Korea that same weekend and would be more than happy to fill the part. Carolina assured her, even though she dismissed completely the thought, she would be paid for her time, and have the royalties for showing on the video. 

But Harin was just glad to be able to see her face live and in color after so long. 

“Alright guys, I’m sorry. Let’s continue!” Carolina apologized, gathering the team around and they were quick to reassure her everything was alright. That didn’t make Jungkook happy. 

He was furious, actually. 

From the moment he had turned around after running and hearing a “cut” that wasn’t from her voice to seeing her excitedly chatting on the phone, and then all the male gaze from the crew melted once she apologized for it. Even the women. He got annoyed. 

“Is something bugging you?” She approached him unexpectedly. As a director, she sensed these things from people, especially on set, and being considerate and professional about it was not only part of her job but also part of her character. 

Somehow he took that as an insult. Because Jungkook could misunderstand things when overwhelmed. He sometimes would let his emotions take the better of him. 

“Yeah,” He nodded. Tongue poking the inside of his mouth giving him an annoyed stance. “You’re my problem,” And just like that, he walked off. 

Carolina was left behind somewhat confused and angered. More than she counted on being. Because of that, what would’ve taken half an hour to film, took two. And between hearing the crew kindly make up excuses for Jungkook’s odd behavior, affirming to her he was the kindest and most easy person to work with, and having Nain interrupt the footage to give her opinion on moves she considered ‘more hip’ for Jungkook to make, Carolina simply lost it. She decided she had more than enough to work with and asked the stylists to prepare the next member. 

Taehyung came in like a ray of sunshine on a cloudy day. Even the way he strode around the set, made her open a wide smile. He was a natural. And she lost count of how many times she said Gucci was losing him as an official ambassador. 

Needless to say, his scenes went so smoothly that it was wrapped up in less than forty minutes. And when she decided to take a break for lunch, so that everyone could rest for a while, she noticed Deo had gone missing. She had been missing ever since Taehyung had started being the focus, actually. 

She tried calling but the reception was bad at the abandoned park, so she waited instead. 

The younger girl only showed up at the location again after lunch. She came in striding with joy carrying a few more clothes and accessories for the boys, only to have her smile fade slowly, noticing Carolina was sitting by a table with none other than Taehyung. 

That action wasn’t missed by her old-time friend. 

“You remember Taehyung, right, Deo?” Carolina made the introductions scrutinizing every movement and reaction. Both of them bowed slightly to each other. 

“Yes, I remember,” Deo said with a small smile. “How do you do?” 

And that was it. That was the puzzle piece Carolina needed to understand something was very off. She didn’t have a clue what exactly it was, but she knew her friend was being weird around Taehyung. And not a good kind of weird. 

Deo had been a fan of him ever since college days, Carolina could remember that clearly. And although she knew her friend wasn’t one to show off how much biased she was straight up to a celebrity’s face, she also knew this kind of reaction was… Completely fake and even forced. 

Not in a million years, Deo would lose the chance of seeing Taehyung act for the cameras as she had done that morning. 

“Good, thank you.” He answered simply. And as he was about to say something else, one of the crew called them to wrap up, noting they had to rush before they lost track of time and the whole day altogether. 

Taehyung smiled politely, his nose scrunching. Almost silently saying he felt awkward for being interrupted. He excused himself and went towards the stylist to change his clothes. 

Carolina made a mental note to ask her friend about what was going on, but for the time being, she decided to solely focus on work, leading Deo to an improvised tent, where some of the boys were already getting their makeup retouched. 

“I’m already done and waiting for inspection,” Namjoon joked, coming in exuding charisma. “I’m Namjoon by the way.” He reached out for Deo’s hand which she gladly took in a friendly handshake. 

“I know who you are,” Deo chuckled amused. “I’m Deo and I’m just here as a…” She looked for a word that could describe her position more clearly. 

“Provider,” Carolina pitched in. 

“What she said,” The younger replied with another chuckle. Namjoon smiled widely, clearly comfortable at their presence. 

“What do you think of adding a beanie or a cap?” Carolina leaned closer to Deo while eyeing the boy’s outfit. “For a more lost boy kinda look? And because he looks good in hats.”

“I’m right here, you know that, right?” Namjoon chuckled at her comment. “But I appreciate that.” 

“I say… What about a crown? A badly made one like kids do when being kids. That would look cute,” 

“I say yes.” They both went on with their conversation like nothing was happening, scanning Namjoon out. Some pins were added to the jacket he was wearing in the process too. 

They kept revising the boys' clothes together, and the two other stylists present in the room kept adding and taking off accessories according to what they deemed best to the concept. 

Jin had added a long yellow scarf around his neck that went over the floor, making him look almost like the little prince — a more indie version of it perhaps. Hoseok had a crochet hat with ears and was wearing a pair of jeans full of rag pieces, all colorful. 

All of this to a second act of the story, like they were personas of themselves, the seven lost boys. 

Taehyung entered the tent a bit after with Jungkook behind him. Carolina and Deo were excitedly chatting with Yoongi and Jimin, not paying much attention to whom was coming or going. 

“I think you would look nice with a scar, yeah” Carolina agreed with Yoongi. “And that could tie-up with your solo MV,” 

“I thought so too,”

“That would look amazing,” Deo added. “And would fit this concept very well let me just say.” 

“Like this?” Yoongi drew it with his finger on his own skin but it wasn’t on the same spot as his Daechwita video. 

“Hmm” Carolina looked at him pensively. “I’d say like this,” She then showed him, tracing his eye and then a little one on top of his eyebrow. “Like you got one more,” 

“Off to the makeup chair again then,” He chuckled and strode off. 

Not even a second after Taehyung and Jungkook approached her, occupying the spot left by the rapper. Deo was still adjusting some pins on Jimin who would chuckle every now and then claiming it was ticklish. 

“Oh and about that. Why would you ask me if we were still out yesterday?” Carolina heard Taehyung ask Jungkook while they waited for her to look up some buttons and pins in the middle of a tiny bag the stylist had given her. 

“I uh… I don’t remember,” Jungkook answered. 

“But didn’t you have plans already? You could have said something if you wanted to co–”

“No! I was fine. I did have… Something. I was probably just asking for something. I don’t recall, really,” He chuckled nervously. 

“Who’s next?” Deo’s voice came through once Jimin went back to re-touch his hair. 

Both boys froze in place eyeing each other unsure of how to proceed. And Deo was about to call for Jungkook but Carolina turned around right at that moment, getting in control of the situation. She needed to know if her suspicion was true, even if she would have to sacrifice herself. 

“Take Tae,” She said to Deo waiting for a reaction, and by the way she pressed her lips against each other eyeing Carolina for a second, it told her more than words could. This was Deo’s way of telling her a silent ‘I’m going to kill you’. “Just add him that funky suspenders over there and these,” And she gave her a pair of mismatched and colorful socks as well as a necklace full of dangling amulets and pearls. 

“Those look nice,” Taehyung added trying to soften the mood and pretend normality but Carolina could see beyond that, especially by the way Jungkook kept fidgeting by their side. 

“Ok, let’s add these!” Deo said taking the things and inhaling deeply. 

“You come with me,” Carolina pointed with her head indicating Jungkook to follow her, which he did, even if he glanced back at Taehyung to check on him. 

And as Carolina waited by Jungkook’s side, trying to convey to the hairstylist what she wanted for the boy’s final look, she would also sneak glances through the mirror to try and understand better what was going on between her friend and Taehyung. They clearly knew each other already. That was more than visible on Carolina’s eyes, and apparently Jungkook’s. 

“So…” Taehyung tried to make conversation as Deo stitched his necklace on his shirt so he could move freely without the accessory hitting his face. 

“So,” She sighed, not eyeing him. 

“You’ve been ok?” His eyes were glued to her face, a palm away from his. It was precious seeing her struggle to stay on her tippytoes. 

“Let’s… not.” She eyed him quickly, “We’re at work.” 

“I know it’s awkward but let’s just try to at least talk to each other?”

“We are,” 

And he sighed. He felt frustrated with lots of unsaid things running freely in his mind. If he only had the chance to have this conversation elsewhere. 

“You know we–” But the words felt shortly because once again he got interrupted. 

“Taehyungssi?” The hairstylist called for him again and his eyes were finally out of Deo’s semblance. “Please come so I can do your hair quickly.” 

“Yes, coming!” And he took a final glance at her. Silent words for amending hearts. 

The afternoon went on with the shootings once all the members got ready and in place. Deo stayed until dinner time, helping with whatever she could. She knew Carolina was keeping her cool, but deep down she was for sure feeling burdened and in a rush, from all the times people called her name for approval or to change things up. 

Carolina however was the very last one to wrap things up. She took the offer of a ride home from her cameraman at four o'clock in the morning, knowing they would have to repeat everything by the time the sun rose again. 

And that’s what happened indeed. She was the first one to arrive on set, by seven sharp. She helped set some of the scenarios and revised the script with her team. 

By the time BTS came, one by one in their individual cars with some of their managers, she had already drunk two cups of coffee. And who knew her by heart was conscient she wasn’t a person who could drink even one cup of caffeine. Needless to say, she was speaking ten words per second, excitement exuding from her being, but her stress levels, although a bit masked by her euphoria, were on edge. 

Jungkook didn’t help that day. 

The more he saw her interacting with everyone else, the more he pressed and teased, claiming to himself he was doing it because of her actions the day before. But the more he did it, the more she gave the same treatment back resulting in more arguments and disagreements. It was like they didn’t see eye to eye on anything. 

When Friday came, and the clock marked six on the dot, a car came speeding, parking right next to some light equipment. Everyone looked surprised at the noise. Jin, who was finally the one being filmed, looked behind Carolina’s shoulder to see what gave him the scare of his life. 

The driver’s door opened. 

“Who called for help?!” Harin’s voice was heard loud and clear and Carolina couldn’t help but open a satisfied smile still with her back turned. 

✿ to be continued...

© socksjinie | all rights reserved. ⏤ do not copy. do not translate. do not repost.

if you want to be tagged for the next chapter, comment bellow!

[ggukkiereads]

Hi!

I was looking for a fic which was taehyung x reader ig...where tae is an idol and oc broke up with him and it ended really bad where she took it on national television and slandered his name...then years later after getting therapy she went to tae and apologized to him but he was petty and he now has jisoo as his gf...oc works at some strip club ig as a manager or sum amd tae frequently visits that club with jisoo...

Thank you.

🌷 Hi there! This is by @sunshyngal =) Yours, Unfaithfully

.

[yoonbroom]

BTS FIC RECS

a list of BTS fics I really enjoyed! pls go and show these amazing authors some love <3 if there wasn't a summary I just included a little blurb from the fics! and anything with * are my own thoughts. now onto the recs ↓

KIM SEOKJIN

TURN BACK TIME - @raplinesmoon

oneshot, fluff, angst, smut

After total humiliation at his middle school baseball try outs, Kim Seokjin wants nothing more than for his awkward years to fade away until he’s thirty. Cue a magic baseball glove, and his wish is finally granted. Seokjin suddenly wakes up seventeen years later, now the star pitcher of the team he’d always dreamed of playing for. Confused and overwhelmed at the prospect of the new life waiting for him, he turns to the only person who seems to understand him — you. Will Seokjin learn what it truly means to be thirty, flirty, and thriving? Or will he find himself wishing he could turn back time?

WITH YOU - @yoonpobs

oneshot, fluff, angst, smut, ceo, marriage, divorce, parent

marrying your childhood best friend was not the love story that most painted it to be. you knew that better than anyone else.

UNTITLED - @eoieopda

drabble, fluff, est relationship, parent

"I loved the dad joon and dad yoongs drabble 🥹 it's freaking cuteeee omg jade 😭😭 *whisper* can you do dad-to-be or dad seokjin too please...? I'm on a seokjin missing hour 🥹 thank you ❤️❤️"

LONG TERM COUPLE - @taetaespeaches

series, fluff, angst, idol au, strangers to lovers

long term couple masterlist *the whole long term couple series is honestly one of my faves😭*

MIN YOONGI

LONG TERM COUPLE - @/taetaespeaches

series, fluff, angst, smut, idol au, strangers to lovers

long term couple masterlist

NO MORE - @gyukult

series (two-shot), angst, smut, fluff, unrequited love, college, secret relationship

yoongi doesn’t like your consistent pining, and one day, after finally coming to terms that he will never reciprocate any feelings back, you give up. yet, for some reason, yoongi is the one who can’t come to terms with the consequences of when he says ‘no more.’

VOWS AKA 10 WAYS TO WIN YOUR HUSBAND'S HEART - @hamsterclaw

series, fluff, angst, smut, arranged marriage, est relationship

You’ve been in your arranged marriage with Yoongi for five years, and he’s never once retaliated for anything you’ve done to him. One day you realise you’ve lost your appetite for provoking him, and you set about trying to win his heart instead.

CARE FOR YOU - @archivedkookie

oneshot, fluff, est relationship, marriage, doctor au

Yoongi will always care for you, no matter what.

BABY, YOU CAN DRIVE MY CAR PT.2- @jungshookz

oneshot, fluff, angst, smut, mechanic au

welcome to min mechanics - what can i do for you today, doll?

THE TROPHY WIFE - @taeyohonic

oneshot, fluff, angst, est relationship, idol au

the proposal doesn’t go as planned

BACK-BURNER - @/yoonpobs

series, angst, fluff, smut, sisters best friend, friends to lovers

sometimes you felt like you were the back-burner of a two-decade-long friendship. how could you ever compete?

VEGAS BABY - @chimivx

series, fluff, angst, smut, idol au, parent au

A peek into the life of an Idol and his soulmate tackling the obstacles that come with having a surprise in the whirlwind of a world they live in. { This link takes you to the full collection of works. }

JUNG HOSEOK

LONG TERM COUPLE - @/taetaespeaches

series, fluff, angst, smut, strangers to lovers, idol au

long term couple masterlist

ONE NIGHT LIGHT - @bts-reveries

series, fluff, angst, smau, parent

Hoseok has been living his very own version of a perfect life. Unlike some of his best friends, this doesn’t include a happy marriage, adorable kids, or even a stable relationship. All he would ever need was music, dancing, and of course, the parties. Now what happens when he gets a wake up call from reality when the door rings approximately six years after his last one night stand?

AT THE CONCERT - @katnisspeetaprim

oneshot, fluff, est relationship, idol au

Hoseok was quite insistent that you come to this show in particular...

KIM NAMJOON

LONG TERM COUPLE - @/taetaespeaches

series, fluff, angst, smut, strangers to lovers, idol au

long term couple masterlist

UNTITLED - @/eoieopda

drabble, fluff, est relationship, parent au

dad!joon

ALONE ON YOUR BIRTHDAY - @monimonimoon

drabble, angst, est relationship

Namjoon promised he would be there on your birthday, he wouldn't be working, he certainly wouldn't work late. Sometimes, increasingly frequently, he broke his promises.

ME AND YOUR MAMA - @joonberriess

oneshot, smut, fluff, est relationship

you like to remember both what life before the little one was and after with your loving boyfriend namjoon.

PARK JIMIN

ROCK BOTTOM - @jkbabiey

oneshot, angst, fluff, smut, marriage, idol au

When, in a four-year marriage, you get to the point where you question its worth, you know that’s your rock bottom. How many I’m sorry’s will you handle? How many times are too many times?

MASK ON - @herherteartear

series, fluff, angst, smau, single dad au

blind dates are never the move.. unless your best friend is vouching for the person you're going on a date with. it couldn't be that bad, right? wrong. now you're in love with a man who has a big secret. a big secret with chubby cheeks and pig tails.

LONG TERM COUPLE - @/taetaespeaches

series, fluff, angst, smut, friends to lovers, idol au

long term couple masterlist

KIM TAEHYUNG

MINI ME - @bts-reveries

series, fluff, angst, smau, strangers to lovers, parent au, artist au

Unlike his best friends, Taehyung was young, wild, and free. No relationship, no babies, no responsibilities. Well he had his puppy, but that was it. Taehyung watched his nieces and nephews grow up and it was no secret that he too wanted to have one of his own someday. So what will happen when he finally finds someone that matches his personality (and himself) well?

WELCOME TO MY YOUTUBE CHANNEL - @tteokggukk

oneshot, fluff, idol au, strangers to lovers

"He’s been watching your videos for quite some time now, ever since your channel started rising. Art was one of his major interests and he absolutely adored the way you made your videos with the calming, ASMR-like sound of mixing paint and how you skillfully glided the brush across the canvas. On days when he found himself tired and in need of a quick way to relax, he’d subconsciously find himself binge watching videos on your channel— even repeating several videos since you were only starting. He found it fascinating, but also because he found you interesting."

ONE OF THE BOYS - @littlemisskookie

oneshot, fluff, angst, smut, childhood friends, best friends to lovers, high school

All your life you wanted only one thing- for Kim Taehyung to like you. You did everything you could to make this happen, from picking up his hobbies and rejecting anything feminine. But who do you start to become when you stop trying to impress him?

LONG TERM COUPLE - @/taetaespeaches

series, fluff, angst, smut, (best)friends to lovers, idol au

long term couple masterlist

"I WISH ID NEVER MET YOU" " I HATE YOU" - @v-hope

oneshot, angst, idol au

"pls do 12 and 27 with tae (angst)"

JEON JUNGKOOK

UNTITLED - @onlyswan

oneshot, fluff, angst, est relationship, idol au

in which you make jungkook’s world spin and you tend to… make him a little too dizzy.

ME AND MY HUSBAND - @gashinabts

oneshot, fluff, angst, smut, est relationship, parent au

You don’t want to brag but you have the world’s greatest husband. Jungkook packs your lunch everyday, and makes cute shapes with the fruit. There’s even a little note, ‘ Have a good day at work, Baby! <3’. Smiling to yourself you place the note down, and eat your food with content.

17 GOING ON 27 - @hansolmates

oneshot, fluff, angst, photographer au

one second, you’re sobbing at prom because the most popular guy in school dumps you due to your relationship being a little prank to break your heart. the next? you’re a creative editor at Ego, the hottest young adult fashion magazine. as you try to figure out what’s the deal with this sudden time skip into adulthood, you come across relationships and friendships that are made to be cherished and made to be broken.

HOME - @bonny-kookoo

oneshot, fluff, smut, idol au

Singing about love without having experienced it properly before, Jungkook felt a little foolish- as if he didn’t quite have the rights to the words he’d put out there for others to listen to. But Jungkook also loved to learn new things; and loving you was one of them.

LONG TERM COUPLE - @/taetaespeaches

series, fluff, angst, smut, strangers to lovers, idol au

long term couple masterlist

want recs for other groups? check out my navigation → here!

[katnisspeetaprim]

Always, Us (Suchwita)

Min Yoongi/FemIdol!Reader Requests open!

Warnings: Established relationship, discussion of pregnancy and marriage, idol!au

Word Count: 1506 M.list

‘Today on suchwita, we have someone people have wanted for a long while.’ Yoongi addressed the cameras as you stood at the side, excitedly waiting for your cue. Since Yoongi started his show, fans had wanted you to make an appearance, but there was never a good enough reason for you to appear until now. You don’t know if the reason fans wanted you here because they genuinely liked you, or if they just wanted to be nosey about your relationship now that it was public. Either way, you were happy to do this for Yoongi.

‘It’s Y/N of the group Prima.’ He stood from his seat and welcomed you with a bow, before pulling your chair out for you. You feigned shock as you sat down.

‘This is how you know cameras are around. He’s acting like a gentleman.’

‘YAH! Don’t say that!’ He snorted with a laugh as he sat down opposite you. ‘I’m always kind.’

‘Sure if you say so.’

‘I’m sure you noticed I got your favourite alcohol here. I’ll keep it for myself if you carry on.’ He smirked, gesturing to the various colourful bottles on the table.

‘You wanna play that game?’  You challenged, leaning forwards with a smirk to match his own. Yoongi relented, leaning back and waving his hands with a smile.

‘Ok, we’re getting off topic and we haven’t even started yet.’ You also relaxed, but you knew you had won that round.

‘As I was aying, this is your favourite. Let me pour you a glass.’ You held out your glass and thanked him as he poured.

‘People have been curious about us since we went public right?’ You asked, getting right into why you were there.

‘Yes.’ He agreed, drinking from his own glass. ‘How did it feel for you to finally be open after having to hide it for so long?’ Yoongi had given you a brief run down of the kind of questions that would be asked the night before, so that you could prepare, though you didn’t want to just write and memorise a script, especially when it came to your love life. You wanted your words to be as natural as possible.

‘It felt good to not have to sneak around. I know you were relieved too.’ Yoongi nodded in agreement.

‘It made me feel like we were a couple of horny teenagers sneaking out at night.’ He laughed.

‘Oh yeah you’re right! But looking back I don’t know why we hid it so long. People have been shipping us since we first met pretty much.’ You smiled warmly, thinking back to when you posted a picture of yourself and a young trainee Yoongi onto your groups twitter account. Yoongi wasn’t well know back then, but your fans were curious about your connection to the young trainee.

‘Do you remember how we met?’ Yoongi asked, smoothly moving the conversation along. You didn’t answer right away. You looked down as a subtle blush spread across your cheeks as you thought of the memory.

‘Why are you blushing? Don’t get shy now!’ Yoongi laughed as he called you out.

‘Shut up.’ You mumbled, all in good fun.

‘Ok. I was late for rehearsal and I ended up barging into your guys room by accident.’ You cringe at that part. ‘ You all stared at me and I was so embarrassed, but you also offended me that day!!’ Yoongi raised his eyebrows questioningly. Had he really?

‘Yes!’ You exclaimed, making him a little nervous. ‘You didn’t know who I was! Even though I debuted like 2 years before that!’ Yoongi sighed in relief and rolled his eyes.

‘I told you before! I didn’t know many current groups back then! I was too busy trying to debut myself.’

‘Yeah, sure.’ You crossed your arms with a pout.

‘Why are you pressed about that still? It was over a decade ago!’

‘That’s not the point! I’m your senior so you should respect me!’ Yoongi choked out and exasperated laugh, before he addressed the crew.

‘do you see what I deal with on a daily basis?’

‘You see! This is what I mean.’ You laughed whilst gesturing towards him. ‘No respect...’ Yoongi shook his head, laughing at the interaction.

‘You know, my mom keeps asking me when we’re going to give her grand kids.’ You froze and internally cursed him for bringing up this topic. It’s not like you don’t want babies with him, it just never felt like the right time to try. Especially now with his military service coming up...

‘I always thought we’d try after your enlistment, but we never really discussed it....’ You confessed, feeling the energy of the room die slightly. You saw Yoongi’s eyes widen ever so slightly at your answer, but he covered it up by rubbing his face.

You weren’t lying when you said it hadn’t been talked about, so your answer definitely caught him off guard.

‘We also need to find time for a wedding.’ He played it off cooly, trying to move on with a joke. You frowned to yourself. His reaction was strange. This definitely needed more investigating.

The remainder of filming flew by. You’d managed to avoid any more awkwardness after that and put on a good show. You were fairly certain that part would be cut anyway. It may have been a little too personal to bring it up in that way in hindsight....

‘So, do you want to talk about what you said?’ Both you and Yoongi were sat in his car in the parking lot. You could get a lift from the company driver, but Yoongi proffered the freedom of being able to drive himself. ‘About having kids?’ He looked over to you with an expression you couldn’t quite read. Looking down at your hands in your lap, you began to speak.

‘I meant what I said. I want kids with you, but I ... also don’t want to give up my career...’ You trailed off. He sucked in a breath at your words, but stayed silent. ‘I just said that about your enlistment because I didn’t know what else to say.’ You sniffled slightly, but you were determined to not get upset. Yoongi placed a comforting hand on your thigh and leaned across the console.

‘Hey. You won’t loose your career. You really think Bang PD would let you go after all these years?’ He spoke soothingly. No matter how hard you tried, you couldn’t stop a few tears escaping your eyes.

‘I know it’s stupid to think this way but-‘ Yoongi quickly shook his head.

‘Don’t talk like that. If you’re upset it’s not stupid, ok?’ He had now moved his hand to the back of your neck, rubbing calming circles into your skin. You slowly looked up at him to see him giving you a reassuring smile. You were unable to stop yourself from reaching up and pulling him into a hug, or as much as you could manage with the gear box between you.

‘I’m sorry I got upset.’ You mumbled into his neck. He craned his neck to place a kiss on the side of your head.

‘Nothing to be sorry for.’ You both stayed like that for a few relaxing moment as you calmed down. Pulling back, you wiped at your eyes before quickly pecking his lips.

‘We need to talk properly at some point, but right now I need you to take me home so I can stuff my face with ice cream.’ Yoongi broke out into his iconic gummy smile as he stared at you.

‘You must be feeling better if you can crack jokes. Now put your seatbelt on woman.’ Yoongi pulled out of the parking lot and started the journey home. You both sat in comfortable silence, only the sounds of the quiet radio played in the car. You thought back to the filming, when you suddenly remembered something he so casually said during the interview.

‘So...’ He glanced at you briefly, before looking back to the road. ‘What was that about a wedding?’  You smirked when he choked on his own spit and clearing his throat.

‘Ah yeah. That...’

‘You haven’t even proposed to me.’ You teased, hoping he might get a hint. Yoongi fully looked at you when he pulled up to a traffic light, smile tugging at his lips.

‘Do you want me to?’

‘I certainly wouldn’t be oppose to the idea!’ You both sent coy smiles to each other and that was that. Conversation over.’ The two of you didn’t need to get married to know you loved each other, but having said that...

And thus, a few weeks later, Korea woke to the news that you and Yoongi had secretly eloped and made your marriage official.

You had a lot of explaining to do to your parents, but you got out of it by promising that you would have a ‘proper’ ceremony at a later date. For now though, you were both content with how things were.

[7brownsuga7]

bts x idol!gf headcanons pls!!

i’ve been loooving ur bts boyfriend headcanons so far! ur so talented

Omg thank you so much 🫶🏽 I actually enjoyed writing this. Here you go & enjoy! <3

Namjoon:

• Tries to be discreet with your dating but will accidentally leave hints like some of your merch/stuff in the background of his pics/lives.

• Paparazzi pics in museums & galleries. Definitely off guard

• Always in touch when the other is away.

• Will publicly share your music/projects. Is a big supporter

• Spotting’s in clubs. Shades on dancing the night away. Y’all are definitely the talk of the night

• You both subtly post things on your story that insinuates that you both might be dating. Same location, same background, posting pics at same event or place. Posting songs that relate to each other.

• You both definitely talk through your stories. Talking to each other through songs or silly captions etc

Jin:

• Will shut down any bad rumour about you. Very defensive when it comes to you.

• Big supporter and is at all of your shows/events cheering you on if he can.

• Goes on live wearing your merch

• Lives where both of you are cooking together and bickering with each other about who’s better or who does it right.

• Idk I can see y’all presenting together?!! And kinda teasing each other. (I see this before you start dating. And this causes speculation which kind of initiates both of you dating??)

• You both definitely post pics of each other being a mess. Off guard pics 100%

Yoongi:

• Song covers while he plays the instrumental for you on his guitar or piano

• Will stick up for you and will shut down any bad rumour about you. Very defensive when it comes to you. And if you're getting hate he's gonna make sure it's dealt with

• Very protective when out in public together. Is like your own little personal bodyguard and will hold your hand and lead you away from the paparazzi/fans

• Will go on live and call out everyone for your fan edits. Even though he acts like he doesn’t like it he blushes and secretly saves them.

• He’s caught with your picture as his lockscreen

Hobi:

• Loads of dance videos and choreographies.

• Lives where you both are just dancing and vibing in the practice room.

• Duet video dance covers that he begs you to do

• Cameos in each others MVs

• Has your merch. Has your photocard hanging on his jeans or bag for sure.

• Is spotted with your initials painted on his fingernails

• Always showing you off to the cameras with a big grin on his face. Showing your photocard, merch, his lockscreen of you, showing his nails or any jewellery with your initials on it.

• Taking selfies with your posters/adverts with a big smile on his face. Or even will do a little freestyle dance in front of it lmfao

Jimin:

• Cameos in each others projects. Him more so in yours.

• Will talk about you in his lives. Will purposely make up a comment and read it out and then go on a whole rant about you. Will get shy and then wave it off

• Duet video covers that you beg him to do

• Posting pics with the same background/location so people know you're together

• Likes every and any fan edit of you both.

• You both are always spotted on little dates like cafes, pottery painting or just casual walks

• You both wear matching jewellery that he picked out himself

• Taking selfies with your posters/adverts with a happy proud smile on his face and the most sentimental and encouraging paragraph

Taehyung:

• Cameos in each others projects/MVs

• Loads of leaked messages of y'all being messy

LFMAO.

• Loads of photo shoots from him. He loves being your personal photographer

• Will purposely like and interact with any conspiracies and speculations about you dating. (Before you both went public with your relationship)

• He will beg you to go on variety shows together. He sees it as something fun. I can see you both bickering during the recording and making fun of each other/ teasing. You both would kill it though even though you don’t take it seriously you’d probably end up doing great in the games.

• Public outing spottings. You guys are always seen out together holding hands or him with his arm around you. You guys always stop for pictures.

• You both wear matching jewellery to symbolise your relationship

• Y’all are always caught kissing in public. So many pictures have been leaked

Jungkook:

• Paparazzi pics of your date nights. Holding hands and running away from the paparazzi/fans as a game

• Very sneaky and lowkey. Like you're known to be dating but you're very sneaky with it. Always hiding from paparazzi and not really speaking about your relationship publicly.

• But will publicly stick up for you if there's rumours going around or hate. He's shutting that shit down

• Duet cover videos that you guys randomly post that has the fans going insane

• Hot dance covers. Y’all both being sweaty having re-recorded many times due to fuck ups, teasing and getting distracted iykwim ;)

• Always FaceTiming and calling when either of you are away. You both miss each other so much and you can't go without communicating. He literally will keep on messaging you if you don't respond

• Fan edits go crazy and he eats it up every time. He’s obsessed with watching them.

• I can imagine him calling you during his promotion sketch videos. Seen giggling on the phone to you, excited to talk to you after his promotions. Sometimes you might even make a cameo in them

• You’re always seen discretely wearing his clothes

[euphoricfilter]

hearts for dinner ~ drabble 1:

pairing: yandere! taehyung x demon! reader

genre: fluff || smut || non-idol au || established relationship || yandere au

summary: the lust of kim taehyung

tags/ warnings: he films her without her knowledge. smut in the forms of: phone sex/masturbation, cumming on thighs, fingering, mentioned oral, sort of cum play, first kisses!!

notes: takes place before the previous part :D

<- previous || where you can read my other stuff!!

.　 . • ☆ . ° .• °:. *₊ ° . ☆.

the first time taehyung had invited you over to his house, it took every single cell of willpower to not lock the door and demand you move in with him that very second.

it had only been a couple of months since he’d asked you on your first date, seconds after meeting you enough for him to be entirely enamoured by your mere existence.

the pretty little dove he wanted to cage and keep to be cherished by his all consuming love for the rest of time.

there was only so many nights he could watch you through the camera he’d planted in one of the flower pots he’d given you before he was desperate to feel your flesh against his.

waiting for you to be tucked under the plethora of blankets on the bed before he’s snatching his phone off the desk, calling you.

he needed to be the last thought before you fell asleep, treading through your dreams, following you into the real world. he needed your mind as full of him, as his was of yours. needed you to understand the tight squeeze of his fragile heart every time he thought of you.

he needed your reason for life to be him, to want to breathe his air, touch him. he wanted the spiral of love, pulling the both of you so far into the black hole of raw desire to be the only thing that surrounds the both of you, as he moulds your very own paradise.

even on the nights you’d be sleepy as he calls, he can see the faint outline of a smile, barely there on your lips when you hear his voice.

and even on those nights it wouldn’t be hard to rile you up, smooth timbre of his voice ever so sweet as he tells you how pretty you are. how as he closed his eyes he could see the outline of your body, how much he wanted to mark you as his for the world to see.

teasing as you go quiet, hand palming his cock as he asks if you’re wet. if you’d be a good girl and press a finger through your folds, press a thumb over your clit.

he’d watch on the screen of the laptop, mound under the blanket where you’d slipped your hand into your panties.

he’d have to stave off his orgasm, always such a good thing for him. some nights you’d get a little hot, covers slipping onto the floor, and tae wouldn’t be able to help the ropes of cum that paint your face on the laptop screen at the little peek of your pretty little pussy, the perfect treasure taunting him.

you’d always been so shy, so to have you wriggling beneath the sheets as he tells you how to pleasure yourself made his heart soar, cock throbbing with the incessant want to cum between your walls, the rawest form of claim.

the night of your first kiss— that wonderful day you’d finally come over to his place, will forever be ingrained in his mind. how red your cheeks had been, ever so flustered. fingers digging into the fabric of his shirt as you blurt out your admission of never having kissed anyone before.

so unsure of yourself he was convinced he wouldn’t last the night with you sat in his bed, a vulnerable little thing.

“it’s okay, pretty” his thumb had brushed down your cheek, gentle reassurance. caramel sweet words soothing the sheer panic you’d felt.

there had been a quiver in your fingers as he leaned forward, eyes squeezed tight as his lips brushed over yours. the briefest little kiss, teasing you.

you’d chased after him, desperate for more. pressing a soft peck to his lips.

he hadn’t known you’d get so excited, hand shoved between your thighs as you try to relieve some of the growing arousal.

“oh sweet thing” he’d crooned, hands holding both your cheeks as he’d kissed you, tongue pressing into your mouth.

he remembers how you’d rubbed your poor little cunt on his thigh, how you’d admitted no one’s ever touched you before.

you’d watched as he’d tugged your panties down, showing you how to play with yourself. his fingers spreading your folds, thumb slipping into you.

the first time you moaned his name, he came over your thighs, slapping the head over your cunt to watch his seed mix with your arousal pushing it into you afterwards, making you push it all back out only to make you swallow it after.

it didn’t take much to convince you to stay over his house after that, tucked away sleeping in his bed with his head between your thighs, or your hand wrapped around his cock.

because taehyung knew you were perfect, your own version of love slowly forming into the raw sort of need that he had for you. your souls slowly becoming one, with every moment you spent together. because you even met in your dreams.

your life, be it awake or in the world of dreams, taehyung had taught you his way how to love.

[bangtanficsforyou]

They Reject You (maknae line)- part two

Pairing: Bts maknae line x Reader

Word Count: 8.8K

Warnings: swear words here and there

A/N: here's my patreon just in case you enjoy reading my stuff!

Park Jimin

Jimin's eyes light up when he spots you in the cafeteria. You're sitting alone with a cup of coffee and typing away something on your laptop and he can't help but feel like the chair next to you is practically calling for him. 

He makes a quick beeline towards your table and occupies the seat. "Hey, sweetheart."

You don't bother looking up at him as your eyes remain fixed on the screen.

"You shouldn't be sitting alone, if you needed company you could have just texted me," he suggests taking hold of your coffee cup. His plump lips wrap around the straw and he draws up the liquid extra loudly, knowing very well that the noise annoys you.

However, you pay no attention to his lack of table manners.

"Do you know we were supposed to have an exam today but it got cancelled?" He speaks in a tone of disappointment, knowing you'd agree with him. It's one of your icks when you've worked hard for something and have shown up for it, but ultimately do not get the chance to prove yourself.

But you still remain focused on your work and give no reaction or response.

At this point, Jimin finds himself feeling curious as to what might be so important in your laptop that it has all your attention. He leans forward to take a peek and realises that you're working on an assignment.

"Assignments are now more important than me, I see," sighing dramatically he looks down as if upset by your lack of acknowledgement. Not even a moment later he looks up subtly to check if you're looking at him.

When he realises that you aren't, the slightest bit of annoyance sparks inside him.

"If you're not going to talk to me, I should just leave," he keeps his tone casual, not intending to let the fact that he's feeling grumpy, be known.

You tilt your head cutely and mumble something along the lines of vertices having a degree two to yourself. 

Jimin's jaw drops in complete shock. The last time you two had a proper chat was three days back and now that he's trying to talk to you, this is how you treat him?! If that's what you want, fine. He isn't going to sit here and beg you to pay attention to him.

"Fine, I'll leave. I have better stuff to do anyway," he grumbles and takes his leave.

If anyone were to take notice of Jimin's expressions, they'd probably end up laughing. He looks angry but that little pout on his lips and the sad look in his eyes makes him look like a little child throwing tantrums. 

It's a good thing your eyes are not on him. Not even when he makes his leave.

----------------------------------------------------------------

Two classes later, Jimin is scrolling through his Instagram when he comes across a reel of a cute puppy doing the usual puppy antics. His first instinct is to send it to you. However, when he clicks on the share button, he doesn't find your account on the list of people to send. His brows furrow in confusion and he types your account id on the search bar only for the screen to read a message saying no matches found. 

Have you....have you blocked him?

He exits the application and opens WhatsApp. When his eyes land on your contact he notices how your profile picture is appearing to be blank and it only makes him desperately type out a message to you. 

Throughout the class, he keeps hoping that he'd notice a double tick to assure him that you haven't blocked him but unfortunately, no such thing occurs.

At the end of the day, he goes to sleep with a displeased frown. How could you do this? How could you just ignore him during recess and then block him on social media out of nowhere? He didn't even do anything wrong. 

Did he?

He tries to recall the last time the both of you had a proper conversation and his mind goes to the events that occurred on the night of the frat party. 

It's true that you had snapped at him and that the conversation you had, would not fall under the category of 'friendly'. But he didn't think it was serious, either. Both of you had silly arguments here and there, but it never seemed to matter in the long run. Somehow or the other, Jimin always managed to get under your skin and get a reaction out of you. Sooner or later, the two of you would fall back to the rhythm of him annoying the shit out of you and you talking back to him. 

The more Jimin recalls the little fiery banters you two have engaged in, in the past, the more his confidence grows. He tells himself this time would be no different. It may take a little more time but Jimin is sure you'll be talking to him again. 

It's true that you have never blocked him before. Or never have downright ignored him like this. Even when you would appear to be mad, there was always that little twitch of your eyes or you poking the inside of your cheeks with your tongue, which let him know that he was being successful.

But it doesn't matter. 

Maybe you're really really mad at him this time. But he's sure he will melt that anger away with his smile and charm.

It works on everyone, no doubt it will work on you as well.

----------------------------------------------------------------

With a wide confident smirk plastered on his face, he walks into your classroom and looks for you. 

His smirk softens into a small smile when he spots you with your head buried in books. 

He ignores the hushed whispers and the dreamy stares and walks to your seat before sliding next to you. 

"Hey sweetheart," he says, putting the effort to make his voice extra sultry and smooth. That always works on the girls. 

And for a moment, Jimin thinks he has won when he notices the look of complete surprise on your face. However, his victory is short-lived as your surprise fades quickly and once it does you're back to your work without paying him any mind.

"I got you a gift," he places the said gift on top of your notebook. A rose. "I looked at it and it reminded me of you."

Your hands falter for a brief moment as the nib of your pen is met by the flower. You use your other hand to move the flower out of your way.

Jimin huffs. He is starting to get annoyed and there's this sense of unsettlement in his veins but he tries to look amused. If there's one thing that bothered you to no end, it was when he found your anger as a source of his amusement. 

"Awww," he coos with an underlying tone of mockery. "Are you angry at me?" 

You don't react. Jimin is neither surprised nor flattered. 

"It's so cute though," he comments, and only if you were looking at him would you have known it's only his voice that gives the faux impression of him being amused. His eyes, his frown even the curve of his lips don't hide the fact that he is anything but not amused. 

Jimin feels a mix of frustration and desperation, which makes him snatch the pen away from your hand.

You seem startled by his actions but instead of arguing with him for being such a pain in the ass, your hand makes its way to your pencil pouch. However, before you can take another pen out, Jimin is taking that away from you as well. 

"You aren't getting these back until you talk to me," he declares, as he hugs the pouch and your pen close to his chest as if shielding them away from you.

You sigh, not out of agitation or anger. You seem bored. Something that scares and hurts Jimin, at the same time.

"What do you want?" You query, finally talking to him directly. After four days.

"What do you mean by what do you want?" He scoffs, making air quotes to mock your question. "You aren't talking to me and have blocked me on socials. What do you think I want?"

You sigh, once again and once again you look bored. As if you'd prefer to be anywhere but here. "I thought you had a reputation for being a fuckboy or something."

Jimin's brow furrow in confusion. "What does that have anything to do with this?"

"As a fuckboy whose commitment lasts for only one night, you must have faced many instances where you just wanted the girl to just take the hint," you state, speaking in a tone that's so calm that it makes Jimin squirm in discomfort. "Wonder why then, do you not know when to take the hint yourself."

His eyes fall and suddenly all traces of anger and frustration is gone and is replaced by sadness. Jimin looks a like sad kid who has just been told Santa isn't real. 

The look in Jimin's eyes catches you by surprise. He is an expert at making sad eyes to lure someone in. You know that because you have been a victim of it. But Jimin's eyes always had that little spark in them. Something that gave away his act and highlighted the mischief brewing within them. Something that let you on the fact that he's only pretending to be sad. 

However, now that you look into his eyes, they just seem dull. Making it seem like Jimin is sad, maybe for real this time.

You ignore the urge you feel to comfort him and maintain a blank face. Why should you even feel bad for choosing yourself? How many times has he thought or cared about his words and how they have made you feel? How many times was he there to wipe the tears that he made you cry?

Not even once. 

You may be someone who's tough and headstrong but you're also just as soft and loving on the inside. If you give in now and comfort him just to see him happy, you know you will be repeating the same cycle with yourself. And it would be so damn toxic.  

"Are you really not going to talk to me?" He whispers, in a soft voice. 

"I don't want to, trust me." This time your voice is not cold. This time you sound like you. The you, Jimin is familiar with. You don't even seem mad. And that's exactly how Jimin knows that you mean what you're saying.

--------------------------------------------------------------

Jimin has had a tough week. 

Nothing out of the ordinary, perse. He has been going to parties, has been getting drunk and has been the same him. But maybe that's exactly why he is having a tough time. Because despite doing regular 'Jimin' things, he hasn't been feeling like himself. 

He doesn't even know what's wrong. Or maybe he does, he just wants to ignore it and pretend that everything is fine. That he's fine. 

He does his classes and tries his best to focus on the material that's being taught but somehow or the other, he zones out. 

But it's not like it's a big deal. It's normal and all cool. He's fine. 

During football practice, he misses the opportunities that present themselves to him as if he's a blind man. 

But again, that's normal, right? Even the best of players make mistakes. Who's Jimin to not make one? It's fine. He's fine. 

During lunch, he accidentally puts pepper instead of salt in his food. But that's also normal! Nothing out of the ordinary. 

He's fine. 

He repeats these two words in his mind as he makes his way to the next class. However, he is met by a sight that has his steps halting.

It's you. 

You have your head thrown back and you're laughing at something your friend said.

The scene causes a stir of emotions inside him. 

One of the first things he feels is longing. Any other time he would deny it with everything in his being but now that you're in front of him like this, he simply can't. He misses you. He misses talking to you. He misses teasing you. He misses how your nose would scrunch up in annoyance. He misses the way you would chew on your lower lip to hold back from smiling. 

He misses everything about you.

The next emotion that hits him is anger. Here he is, feeling like he can't act and function normally without you, and there you are totally unbothered. 

The thought also scares him. What if, what if you just don't care about him anymore?

If that so happens to be the case, Jimin at least needs to know for sure. He can't be going around like this with a hole in his chest and having unanswered questions in his mind regarding what exactly happened for you to suddenly cut him off like this.

So, the next thing he knows, he's walking towards you. Ignoring the surprised look on your face, he grabs the courage to speak. 

"Can I talk to you for two minutes?"

You look at your watch simply because you need to make an excuse as to why you can't give him the two minutes. "Sorry, I have to head for my class."

Jimin nods, having expected something like that. "We can talk while walking. I'll drop you to your class."

"You don't need to–"

"I want to," he cuts you off with a determined look on his face, not willing to take no for an answer.

Truth be told, you have no intention of talking to him. But somewhere, at the back of your mind, you're curious as to what he might have to say. After all, after one whole week of Jimin not trying to bug you, you had honestly assumed that that was the end of whatever friendship (if you can even call it that) you two had. 

Jimin takes note of the indecisive look on your face and before you can come to a negative decision, he takes hold of your hand and gently tugs you to a side. 

"What–"

"I am sorry but I had to," he says with a tone that conveys nothing but sincerity. 

You're half pissed at Jimin's behaviour but you ignore it nevertheless, thinking that whatever it is that he has to say, it must be serious. Because you have never seen Jimin being like this before. 

"Whatever you want to say, make it quick," you say with a sigh. 

"Why are you cutting me off like this?" Jimin's words are out of his mouth the moment he knows that you're ready to listen to him. It's like he has been waiting for ages to ask you this particular question. 

Your brows furrow for a split second before you scoff. "Is that what this is all about?"

He is confused as to why you're looking at him as if he has asked a really stupid question.

"Yes?" He responds hesitantly. 

You sigh once again, this time much louder and in disbelief. "Oh my gosh, I can't believe this," you mutter to yourself before looking at Jimin and he does not miss the gleam in your eyes. 

"Let me spell it out for you, you were an asshole to me," you state, your voice having a certain hint of anger to them. 

"A-Asshole? How?" He stutters, looking even more confused than before. 

"You knew I had feelings for you, but you couldn't give two shits about it. I had no issues with you not liking me back, but rubbing all your sexual escapades on my face, and flirting with me is a total disregard and disrespect to how I feel."

"I didn't–"

"It doesn't take much for someone to realise that. Anyone with the minimum common sense can figure that out for themselves. But just because your feelings have always been shallow does not mean that the people around you are shallow as well."

There are a lot of responses that come to Jimin's mind but he knows none of those are good enough.

"Do you know how much of a fool I felt when you were being ignorant of the fact that I am a person who feels? I felt so stupid to be hanging out with you when you couldn't even pause and give me the minimum respect I deserve."

Each word of yours hits him like a bullet but he thinks this has been a long time coming. He is willing to take as many hits as it requires, but he just hopes this is not the end. That somehow he gets to redeem himself. No matter how difficult it is. 

"But at some point, you realise that you shouldn't put up with someone who doesn't appreciate you. I know how I deserve to be treated and it's obvious that you don't know how to treat a woman with respect. Hence, I'm afraid we can't be….friends anymore." 

You paused briefly before using the word friends as if you were not even sure if that's what you two were. And it sure as hell, makes Jimin feel shittier than he did moments ago. 

Oh my goodness, he really has messed this up, hasn't he? 

When you turn around to leave, Jimin doesn't stop you, knowing very well there's nothing much he can say to prove that you mean much more to him than what he has made you believe. 

So he lets you go. 

But only with the intention of earning your forgiveness.

Kim Taehyung

February

Tae 🐻:  did you reach home?

You: yes, just did!

Tae 🐻: i see

Tae 🐻: take rest and sleep well

Tae 🐻: also, i got a little something for you 

Tae 🐻: *image attached*

On clicking the picture, you're greeted with a small little teddy bear that looks adorable in every way possible.

It brings a smile to your face and there's a part of you that knows that it's his way of apologising for the dimmed smile you had throughout the day. His words may have been upsetting but at least he knows the effect they have had on you. And you know he's sorry for it. Mayhaps, that makes it a bit easier for you.

You: it's cute 

Tae 🐻: i know 

Tae 🐻: that's exactly why it reminded me of you 

You chuckle and shake your head softly.

He never leaves a chance to flirt.

--------------------------------------------------------------

April

You: you won't believe what happened

Tae 🐻: what

Tae 🐻: What

Tae 🐻: WHAAATTTT

You: a cat just snuggled against me.

You: CAN YOU BELIEVE IT???

You: like i used to be so scared of them 

You: but now i think they are just soft little balls of fur

You: now i want a cat for myself

Tae 🐻: this is so cute for some reason

Tae 🐻: i can just imagine your bright excited smile *sighs*

Tae 🐻: I'm glad you are not scared of cats anymore 👍😌

Tae 🐻: but but but 

Tae 🐻: idk how to feel about you getting a cat

Tae 🐻: what if you get one and then your whole attention is on them and then you forget about me 👉👈

You: 🙄

You: is this supposed to be a joke?

You: can i not have a bear and a cat at the same time???? 😒

You: also, don't worry i doubt the cat can ever get as annoying as you're 

You: so in a way, you'll always be special 😌

Tae 🐻: uhh thank you

Tae 🐻: that's very reassuring 🤗💖

You: well why, you're welcome 🤗

-------------------------------------------------------------------

July

Your phone rings making you alert of an incoming call. Checking the screen you realise that it's Tae. 

"Hello?" You greet in a sing-song voice, your mood suddenly turning bright.

"Hello, my lady," he greets back in a British accent. "How have you been?"

"Same old, mate, same old," you sigh, mimicking his accent. "Work has been hectic."

"It's even worse that I haven't seen you for so many days" he huffs, his accent gone and voice sounding whiny and complaining. Something that makes you think he has a cute adorable pout on his face.

"I know, work decided to be the biggest bitch ever," which is why you and Taehyung have not been able to find free time to spend with each other. 

The lunchtime for his department changed, making it impossible to have lunch together. Your department has way more workload than his does and as a result of which, you always have to stay back at least an hour to complete your share of work.

Taehyung doesn't wait for you or for your work to get done. And in a way, you're glad. You can't imagine how tiring it can be to wait a whole hour after a full day of work when you know you have the option to just go home and lay in bed and do nothing. 

Everyone deserves good rest and sleep after spending a whole day in front of a computer and that includes Taehyung. You'd never expect him to wait for you or do anything that would be at the cost of his discomfort.

Anyways, it's not like you and him have been out of touch. You text him about every silly little thing that would occur throughout your day. It could be a lizard staring at you intensely as if judging the way you're brushing your teeth, and Taehyung will be the first person to know about it. Hence, yes you do miss his presence physically but your days have been filled with him. 

You both have chatted for hours on end, sometimes via text, other times on a call.

This time is no different. You two end up talking for a whole hour before, he says something that ends with your heart skipping a few too many beats.

"Hey man, I won't say I love you on the phone," he jokes, but there's just something in those words that tells you he knows this isn't just a joke. "That's not fair to the both of us."

It is said out of nowhere, yet it fits the context of the conversation as well as of the situation you both are in. 

"Umm, w-well, say it in person I guess." Your cheeks warm up, a bashful smile that is so incredibly shy at the same time, adorning your lips.

"So I will," he whispers as if even though you two are only connected via call, he knows how gentle this moment is and what it means to you.

And then, the conversation is loud again. You with your silliness and him playing along with it and laughing loudly at your antiques.

----------------------------------------------------------------

September

"Why do you look down?" You query as you munch on popcorn.

Taehyung shakes his head, denying anything's wrong. "Nothing, I just feel tired, I guess."

Bullshit. You know Taehyung well enough to know when he's lying. His eyes just twinkle in a certain way as if on alert about being caught. 

"Do you want to leave?" You whisper, paying mind to the people around you. The last thing you want is the people in the movie hall shushing you or glaring at you.

He shakes his head, again. This time more vehemently. "No, I want to watch this movie with you."

You sigh but then speak in a gentle tone. "You know you can tell me right? Anything that's bothering you, you can tell me."

Taehyung looks at you and there's that certain look of vulnerability as if he's scared and worried. But whatever it was that he was looking for, he finds it in your eyes. It makes him decide that yes, he can be honest with you.

"Remember Kira? I saw her today and I guess it just triggered something within me."

Kira. 

How can you forget that name? 

Two months in your friendship and the both of you had discussed your lists of shitty exes and Kira was a topic discussed in detail.

Kira was his first and only girlfriend whom he loved a lot. Their relationship was filled with ups and downs but he never let it come in the way. He was there for her in ways you only see in movies and shows. But alas, things did come to an end. 

What hurt Taehyung more than the relationship coming to an end were the comments made by Kira. She didn't stutter while saying that he's just not the kind of guy she's into. He isn't bulky or muscular. He laughs too much and smiles easily. He isn't intimidating and is very gullible and naive. 

That...that was what broke him.

You remember the day he told you about Kira. It had made you so angry. How could anyone ever say something like that about a person? If you're not interested you're most welcome to leave but why go an extra step to be an asshole and scar someone? 

What was worse was the fact that you could tell Taehyung believed in those words. He thought they were a down point to his character and that it made him unlovable. 

It's also since that day, that you have developed this protectiveness over him. He may not see it but he deserves the absolute best. He deserves to know that it isn't difficult to love him at all, in fact, it might just be the easiest thing in the world. 

But right now, you know that her words from the past are probably being repeated in his mind over and over again. Hence, it becomes your goal to make him see that those words are not true. 

"I understand why it may have been triggering for you," you comment taking hold of his hands and playing with his fingers. "But I assure you, she was only being a bitch because she knew she losing a gem."

Taehyung smiles a smile that does not reach his ears. "Thank you."

"Don't thank me. I'm not done yet."

For the first time this evening, the briefest spark of amusement enters his gaze. 

"I know she hurt you, but if you need a reminder that what she said to you was total bullshit, I'll serve as one."

Your voice comes out firm but there's that tone of love and affection to it, that is simply unmissable.

"People say and do mean things and they hurt us. But their choice of actions and words define them, not us. At some point, you have got to stop and realise that you can't keep hurting yourself because of what someone has said. It's difficult to do that, I know but that difficulty is worth it. You are worth it."

A small, tiny smile appears on Taehyung's lips at your words. Before he can get the words out to express his gratitude, you're speaking again.

"Also, all those things that she made you feel were unlovable about you, make you just that much more lovable. Because that's what makes you, you."

Once you're done, you feel the insecurity hit you that you may have been a little too passionate or that you went overboard. But Taehyung resting his head on your shoulder and muttering the softest of thank you's makes you relax. 

And that's how you watch the rest of the movie. With his head on your shoulders and him constantly wanting some part of his body to be in touch with yours.

---------------------------------------------------------------

December

You were promoted. 

You won't say it was out of the blue, you had seen it coming. Despite that, being recognised and awarded for your hard work, felt nice. 

But your promotion also meant you were now working in a different branch of your office. Same city, a different building. This also meant the chances of you and Taehyung meeting in between work had slimmed down to zero.

But again, it didn't seem to affect the bond you two shared. You two chatted with each other about your day almost regularly. It just didn't feel right, without telling him about the itsy bitsy details of your day-to-day life. 

It was your second week in the new building and by now you had become comfortable enough with the group of fellow employees you were mingling with, for them to ask the very important question. "Do you have someone special in your life?"

The question was asked in good spirits, with raised eyebrows, teasing smiles and mayhaps with an underlying hope that the answer to the question would be 'no' so that they can set you up with the company sweetheart Jeon Jungkook, who you have a hunch, has a crush on you.

Nevertheless, the question makes you stutter. 

It's not a difficult question to answer if the answer is a simple yes or no. But in your case, it's not so simple. It's complicated. 

But how do you explain it to them? 

You don't even know where you and Taehyung lie. You both have never directly addressed the feelings except once or twice. But what does that mean now? Do you two fall under the category of "more than friends, less than lovers"? 

You don't know.

You don't know if he still has feelings for you. What if it was just a phase and now all that you two are is just good friends? What if you're the only one who keeps thinking of the time you had confessed and what if you're the only one to whom the moments spent with the other, mean something special? 

But what if the opposite is true? What if he still has feelings for you, what if it wasn't just a phase? What if the moments spent with you, mean something to him as well?

Gosh, this indeed is complicated.

You take a deep breath and conclude that irrespective of whatever his feelings for you may be. You're someone who cares for him. A lot. 

You don't want to be someone who hurts him, ever. Knowing of the few instances that he has been hurt and the way he has been hurt, you never want to make him feel like he failed at love again. Or that, he isn't worthy of love. 

You don't want to assume that Taehyung has feelings for you. At the same time, you don't want to assume that he doesn't. Because you know, if you assume that he doesn't have feelings for you and act accordingly, and then it turns out that he still did, he will feel crushed.

"Let's just say, I do have a certain someone," you answer with a shy smile.

Your new coworkers look disappointed for a brief second, most likely because now they won't be able to play matchmakers but the disappointment is soon replaced by excitement. 

Multiple questions are thrown your way to know about this special person and you spend the rest of lunch trying to answer them as swiftly as possible.

--------------------------------------------------------------

February

You: why the 🙄 next to her name?

You ask in reference to him re-posting a status update of a co-worker on Whatsapp. Something about company lunch.

Tae 🐻: cause she's annoying! 

You: lmao why so 😂

Tae 🐻: oh boy she has no respect for boundaries 

Tae 🐻: her jokes are in such poor taste and inappropriate

Tae 🐻: it's just annoying and hence would explain the emoji choice

You: damn 

You: that's harsh 

You: but I'll trust your judgement

Tae 🐻: as you should, yes 😒

You: but this has me curious, if you were to put an emoji next to my name, what would it be? 👀

Tae 🐻: damn that's a good question

Tae 🐻: let me think

Tae 🐻: How about this one? ✨

You: huh? 

You: that's kind of unique 

You: why that one though?

Tae 🐻: because you shine, duh

Tae 🐻: and you light up every room you walk into 

Tae 🐻: and this ✨ just suits you 

Yet again, you feel the familiar warmth in your chest that at this point is just very common every time you talk to him.

But that doesn't make these little moments any less special for you.

------------------------------------------------------------

March.

Work was extra tiring today. You couldn't catch a breather. Couldn't even go to lunch. Stayed back after work till eleven.

And now here you're, finally home.

While having your ramen, you decide to respond to texts that you haven't and so open WhatsApp. 

Once done, you check through the status updates of people. It's always nice to know what fun people have been up to while you were being drained of all energy.

However, you frown when Taehyung's status appears on your screen. There are a few paragraphs written about love and how it can change the way you view life. When the next slide appears, it's a picture of him with a girl. He has his arm casually on the girl's shoulder as they smile at the camera. That added with the heart emoji as the caption causes a weird nervous sensation in your stomach. 

You type out a question as a reply to his status.

You: what is all this about? 😂

You add a laughing emoji next to it just to make sure you sound casual and curious.

Taehyung so happens to be online and his response comes quickly.

Tae 🐻: did you not see my status updates? 😂

Tae 🐻: I'm in a relationship ☺️

And just like that, your hands start shaking and the food in front of you gets forgotten.

Jeon Jungkook

It's been almost a month since you confessed to Jungkook. 

During the first week, you tried to reach out to him because you were so angsty to just get some sort of response. You didn't care if it was in the negative or was harsh. Anything was better than this. Anything was better than him just straight out ignoring your presence as if you never existed. 

You just couldn't understand. Did the friendship you two had mean nothing to him? Did you ever mean anything to him? If you did, how could he possibly treat you this way? Did you not deserve at least a proper explanation as to why he was doing what he was doing?

But after a week, you gave up. Your hurt turned into anger. You didn't care what his possible explanation could be. You did deserve better than this. So you ultimately stopped trying to reach out to him.

It's not like it doesn't bother you. Sometimes, it still does. But the difference is, you have stopped expecting anything from him. And that admittedly, makes it a little easier for you.

"What are we doing today?" Namjoon asks with a bright dimpled smile as he took his seat on the chair. 

"Four short interviews and then a late-night show," you reply, quickly opening your pouches to get out the brushes. 

He sighs. "Another round of answering what our love life looks like."

You snicker, finding it hilarious how done he looks. "Another round of you answering on behalf of the team that you all are a little too busy to find time for dating."

Namjoon shakes his head. "Sometimes I wish I didn't know English." 

The thought makes you laugh with your head thrown back.

"Well I can't imagine anyone else being the spokesperson, it would be damn funny."

You really do think that would be the case. Each of the members has a very distinct personality and just imagining what they would be like, is nothing short of amusing to you. 

Your amusement, however, dwindles when your mind comes up with the question about what Jungkook would be like if he were the one translating other members' words into English. But then your mind leads you to imagine how cute his English is, despite being broken. And then your heart ultimately shrank and you had to remind yourself to not think of him.

Namjoon seems to notice your distress and quickly changea the conversation to something else. 

Thankfully, it works. There are no other sad moments where your mind goes to Jungkook and you find yourself enjoying your conversation with Namjoon and that was more than enough. 

-----------------------------------------------------------------

It's three in the afternoon, you conclude after checking your watch. Which means another interview left and after that the boys can rest, until the late-night show of course. This also, means that there's another hour for you to just relax in the AC room. After that, you will have to get to work to remove Namjoon's makeup.

You lay down on the sofa and scroll through Instagram. What's better entertainment than this? 

Your fingers get to work and start scrolling, one meme after the other. Some you find hilarious, some you need to read twice to get and some you simply roll your eyes at. But you guess, that's just how memes are.

However, it's after a few more posts that you find one which simply makes you blink in disbelief. 

It's a picture from the news outlet dispatch. The picture in question is of Jungkook's with his arms around a woman. On reading the caption you realise that the said woman is, Niki from the girl group JION. And to no one's surprise, the photo has caused a stir on the internet and apparently, everyone's talking about it. 

You exit Instagram and open Google. You search for Jungkook and Niki are immediately met with a bunch of articles. Each of them discusses their possible relationship and whether or not they are dating. 

When you feel like you have had enough of the sick churning of your stomach, you close all apps and just shut your phone. 

Wow. 

This is something.

It leaves you perplexed and with a bunch of emotions, you have no idea how to deal with. 

Was he already seeing the woman when you left that note? Gosh, if that's the case, it would be so embarrassing. 

Is that why he thought it would be best to just get rid of you? Was that why he made that sudden move out of nowhere? Couldn't he just tell you that he is dating someone else? Learning this from a news outlet, for every reason, feels painful.

It's not even the fact that he is dating someone. It's just the fact that you both have become such strangers that he feels like a distant person you once used to know. All because you decided to trust him with your feelings.

But most likely it didn't matter. Your feelings didn't matter. You're someone who's always behind the scenes, someone who no one knows. But him? He is the world-renowned artist. He is the one who earns in millions and has an army of fangirls, quite literally. Why should he waste his time caring about how you feel? More importantly, why did you expect him to? 

It was undoubtedly a mistake on your part to have trusted him. As they say, expectations lead to heartbreaks and maybe you had to learn it the hard way. 

But that doesn't mean the pain is anywhere near acceptable. You needed a way to vent your anger, so you do the only thing that comes to your mind.

You block him on all social media sites.

---------------------------------------------------------------

Two weeks since the rumour about Jungkook and Niki dating begun and it's still all over the net. Why, you ask? Because the two people involved in the matter aren't helping their case at all. 

They have been spotted several times together and thus have been fuelling the rumours further. 

It angered you. Weren't idols supposed to be very careful about their relationships? Why were then, these two, flaunting their relationship for the world to see?

You're aware you sound bitter and ridiculous because no one should have to hide if they are dating someone but you just can't help yourself. No matter how hard you try, news about Jungkook and Niki would somehow or the other appear on your feed, be it on insta or Google. It just became unavoidable as these two were everywhere.

The comments didn't help either. People adored them. 

Apparently, these two were the perfect match for each other. Both maknaes of their individual groups and both fan favourites. 

It made it suck all the more for you. 

Argh. 

"Have you seen my chapstick?" Namjoon asks as soon as he enters the room. "Hobi just lectured me about how I should always keep my lips moisturised." 

"It should be in the drawer," you reply and get up to look for the chapstick. "Let me check once."

As it turns out, it indeed was in the drawer. You hand the small tube to him and as soon as you take a seat again, the door swings open to reveal someone you would have never imagined seeing. 

Niki.

"Namjoon oppa," she smiled, putting her dimples on display. "I was looking for you."

Namjoon turned around at the sound of his name. His expression too turns into that of surprise when he realises who it is. "Niki! I didn't know you'd be coming."

Huh, makes the two of us. 

The two idols chit chat and you ignore all of it. Simply, because they seem to get along really well and if there's one thing you know about Namjoon it's how protective he is of all the members. But if he likes and approves of Niki, well you guess she and Jungkook might just be the perfect match. 

It's not like Niki totally ignores your presence. She shoots you a smile that's sweet and warm, and you smile at her right back. Your's looking a tad bit less sincere.

Thankfully, whatever conversation the two of them were having soon comes to an end and Niki leaves the room. 

As soon as it is just you and Namjoon, you blurt out the question you have been wanting to ask for a long time. 

"Are they really dating?" 

Namjoon doesn't seem too surprised by your question, if anything he looks like he expected it. However, he does look hesitant to answer. "Umm, yes they are."

Shit. 

You don't know why you had to ask the question but you did, and now you got your pretty little confirmation and now you're hurting again. 

Well, shit, indeed.

But but but, why was Namjoon hesitant to answer? Was he perhaps aware you had feelings for Jungkook? Had Jungkook told him the reason of requesting a change? 

Fuck, you should really have kept your curiosity to yourself because now your mind is running wild and it's not helping you at all. 

"But, I don't think it's anything serious," Namjoon adds after a beat of silence then nods as if reassuring himself that it was the right thing to say.

It makes you even more paranoid that Namjoon knows about your little more than crush on Jungkook and it makes you want to flee from the spot. 

"Uhmmm, I need to pee," you squeak out and immediately shut your eyes because gosh that was stupid. 

"Uhh, okay." Thankfully, Namjoon isn't weirded out by your silly choice of words. Instead, he looks amused and there might have been something else in his gaze but you are too embarrassed to take notice.

You quickly leave the room and rush your way to the washroom. As soon as you're in, you splash your face with water.

What the fuck? Does Namjoon know? Does it mean that the other members know too? How are you ever going to face them again? 

Shit. Shit. Shit.

This is no good. You should have never confessed. You should never have listened to those excited beats of your heart and to those fluttering butterflies. Look where it got you.

"Don't worry about it, babe. It's all cool, it's all under control now." A voice reaches your ears from one of the stalls in the washroom. 

You assume the woman must be talking on the phone and you ignore it.

"Yes, I know how you feel about it but trust me this whole thing with Jungkook should be over in like a few weeks."

Now, that has your ears all perked up in attention. 

"You know, I don't even like him like that."

What. The. Fuck. 

"I'm not mad at you for it, relax babe, I love you."

And just like that, you hear the toilet flush and the doorknob jiggling followed by Niki stepping out. 

You pour the liquid soap on your hand and wash your hands with them just to look like you weren't eavesdropping on her conversation with her babe. 

Although, could it really be called eavesdropping when she was speaking so loudly? 

Thankfully, Niki doesn't find your behaviour suspicious and leaves the washroom with a small smile lingering on her lips. 

Uhh okay then. 

This is something. 

---------------------------------------------------------------

As soon as the shock dials down and you could think, you knew you had to tell someone. 

You don't know what and how to say, though. You can't just claim that Niki is cheating on Jungkook, despite your initial assumption being that. Because people call their siblings babe too right? Or their best friends? Yes, you can't just assume that she's having an affair behind everyone's back. 

But what you're plenty sure of and have heard Niki admitting is that she does not have feelings for Jungkook. What the heck is going on then? 

Before your mind can start running in circles, the door swings open announcing someone's arrival. Much to your relief, it's Namjoon, someone you can be honest with, without worrying about the technicalities. 

"Listen, I need to talk to you about something," you say, your voice coming out nervous yet firm.

Namjoon takes notice of your nervousness and smiles at you warmly, hoping to put you at ease. "Sure, go ahead."

"I went to the washroom and uhm, I heard Niki talking on the phone about something and I think you should know about it."

A small frown appears on Namjoon's face because of all things, he did not expect that what you had to say was anything related to Niki. He, however, keeps quiet and gives you an encouraging hum to go on. 

"I–She told someone over the phone that she doesn't really have feelings for Jungkook."

Namjoon looks as shocked as you had been but his shock wears off much much quicker than yours did. 

For the first time, he looks a little awkward having this conversation. Scratching the back of his neck, he gives you a small awkward chuckle. "I see what you're saying."

Your first thought to this reaction is that he does not believe you. It would make sense for that to be the case if Jungkook really had told Namjoon about the note. But that does not mean you don't feel incredibly offended and hurt right now. Just because you liked Jungkook does not mean you'd be lying. Is that how much faith Namjoon had in you?

"I'm not lying!" Your voice doesn't hide the emotions you're feeling, not that you were trying to hide them anyway. 

Namjoon's eyes widen and he immediately shakes his head. "No, no, no. That's not what I meant."

You cross your arms and look at him with a scowl, refusing to believe his words. "What did you mean then?" 

He yet, again looks a little sheepish as he answers, "It's just that I don't know what to say."

"You don't have to say anything to me," you reply without missing a beat. "This has nothing to do with me. It has to do with Jungkook. Tell him that this girl probably has some ulterior motives or something. Save him from the heartbreak he will inevitably go through when he comes to that realisation himself."

"You're right, that's exactly what I should do." Something in Namjoon seems to click and he nods. "Wait, I'll be right back."

Just like that, he's walking out in a hurry leaving you all alone in the room. 

---------------------------------------------------------------

It's been fifteen minutes since Namjoon left. 

At first, you were walking with hurried steps from one end of the room to the other but then your anxiety got too much for you and you decided to sort out the skincare items and put them in place. 

Productivity is better than burning calories by walking in circles in a room. Right?

You were only putting the new moisturizer in the drawer when someone clears their throat to announce their presence. 

It rightfully startles you and you let out a small yelp. 

However, when you realise who the person standing in front of you is, it makes your stomach sink. 

Jungkook. 

The same Jungkook you have been avoiding for weeks. Not that it was difficult though, he had never really made any effort to reach out to you. But whatever. 

You swiftly look away from him and get back to work, not wanting to pay him any attention. Why should you? You're not his makeup artist anymore, he does not have any business to be here. 

"Umm, I need to talk to you about Niki." 

You don't respond.

Your silence is met with a sigh from Jungkook. 

"Hyung told me what you heard Niki say. Ummm can you please not share it with anyone else?" 

Maybe it was something about the way the words were phrased but they did not sit well with you.

Your hands pause and a scoff of disbelief makes its way past your lips. Is...is that what he wanted to talk to you about? 

That too, of all things to ask you to not tell others about it? As if you had told Namjoon about it to spread some sort of gossip. The only reason you bothered with it was because....well, you were worried for Jungkook. 

But imagine caring about someone despite being treated the way Jungkook treated you and then that person coming to talk to you for the first time in weeks only to tell you not to get involved. As if it was by choice. 

One thing was for sure, you were this close to letting out the words you have been holding in for a long long time. Your position as a makeup artist be damned. 

"It's just that if word gets out she will be framed as the wrong guy."

She....she will be the one framed as the wrong guy? And you being the one who could potentially do it, doesn't make you sound like the villain? What he's saying is you could do something that could end up making Niki the victim.

That's it. You have had enough. 

"Do you even know what you're saying?"  You speak the words out with your tone laced with every bit of anger you have been keeping in for weeks. 

Jungkook winces. "I do–"

"Let me finish. I have no business telling people what I heard Niki speak on the phone with lord knows who. Heck, if I was selfish I would have just stayed out of it because who's gonna believe my words against those millions of articles and fans shipping you two? But the only reason I thought you should know about it is because what if you really loved her or something? Knowing it later when you're much more invested would be way more painful and crushing." 

Something enters in his gaze but you're too furious to notice or to even pause to give him the time to form a response.

"Not to mention that you treated me like trash. Didn't bother talking to me. Changed your staff without giving a proper reason. Heck, I might just be a make-up artist and you might be a world-renowned artist but I thought we were more than that," for the first time since you started speaking, your voice goes quiet. "To me, you were more than the idol everyone sees. Maybe that's why I assumed I was also someone more than just a make-up artist to you."

"But I guess I was wrong," your voice cracks and as soon as the sound of your wavering voice reaches your ears, you know it's time to shut up. Because no way in hell are you going to cry in front of Jungkook. 

But somehow that single voice crack says a lot.

You have seen Jungkook cry in pain and frustration. You have seen him laugh until his stomach started to hurt. You have seen him drink until he's all giggles and smiles. Those moments had led you to believe that you two were friends, at least. But then if you two ever were friends, he has disrespected that friendship way too much for you to be calm about it.

Jungkook looks at the ground as if it would magically give him the answer to the question of what he should do now. When it doesn't, Jungkook battles himself and ultimately decides that it's best for him to simply say the truth.

He has complicated things enough.

"Niki and I aren't dating." 

------------------------------------------------------

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In Memory of Him | It's Cold In Here

↳ Florist!Taehyung x Artist!f.Reader ⤜ Non-Idol, Late Husband's Best Friend ⤜ Rating: MA 🔞 ⤜ WC: 13,558 ⚠️ Mild language, death/loss of a loved one, deep depression, high anxiety, loads of guilt, hidden feelings, realizations, hurt feelings, repressed feelings, hurt/comfort

Next Chapter⇾ (coming soon!) ◅ Back to story masterlist

With trembling fingers, you smooth out the letter that you found attached to a bundle of flowers on your doorstep.

To the love of my life, For after the funeral Take a deep breath, baby, I know it’s not easy. Even as I sit and write this, I can feel your energy in the next room. You’re always such a worrier, I’m sorry I’ve added to that. It’ll all be better soon, I promise. But, I know you and I know that you’ll pull away, you’ll cut yourself off…and we can’t have that, now can we? You have to keep going if we’re to stay connected even after I’m gone.

So, here’s the first of a collection of some things that you can hold and look back on when the storm starts to roll in. There are only so many words in existence to describe what you mean to me. So, instead of words, I want you to remember these feelings: Warmth - like the sun on your face while you read a great book Satisfaction - the way you sigh softly after a good, lazy day in bed Contentment - waking up with a smile on your face every morning Peace - that moment of quiet before the rain starts, when the scent of petrichor filters in These are all the things you’ve brought into my life the last seven years. I’ve never been able to look at the sun, sleeping, smiles, or storms the same. Never did I imagine I’d meet and marry such a beautiful, kind-hearted soul with a genuinely unique outlook on life. I never had to be reminded to smile because it just came so naturally whenever you were around. You have brought so much light into my world and gave me the best years of my life. You also gave me Sujin, the perfect little replica of myself even if you think he looks more like you than me (I secretly agree, but that’s not something I’ll admit outloud). When I look at our wonderful son, I’m reminded of the beauty that first drew me to you all those years ago. Being his father is the second greatest achievement of my life, the first being making you fall madly in love with me…don’t laugh, you know it’s true. Many people see things in black and white, a beginning and an end…but our life isn’t like that. We’re full of color and everything in between. You’ve supported me at my best and have loved me at my worst. Everything good in my life is because of you. I know you’ll always love me, and I know it won’t be easy once I’m gone, but I need you to promise me you’ll continue to wake up with that smile on your face and never forget how the sun feels or how beautiful the quiet before the storm is. I need my light, my girl, to keep going. Be that guiding light so I know exactly where you are in the world as I watch over you and Sujin. We knew forever wasn’t guaranteed, that’s just the way life is, right? This doesn’t mean it’s over, not by a long shot. You still have so much more to give, so much more love to offer.  I know you’d never forget about me, that’s not what this letter is for—it’s not a reminder of me, it’s a reminder to live, love, and keep shining. There are more where this came from, Taehyung has them and knows what to do, but not until you’re ready for them. I love you so much, never stop living—for me, for Sujin…for you. Love forever, Your Yejun

The letter crumples in your fist, the bundle of hibiscus and lavender it was attached to forgotten on the step between your feet as you bury your face in the crook of your elbow and scream. It’s better that way—the symbolism of the hibiscus flower on a letter from Yejun is a punch to the gut when he’s no longer here. Eternity? Bullshit. The sound is muffled into the thick wool of your coat but no less filled with agony. As if the day wasn’t hard enough, everything went belly-up when you found the flowers and the letter on your door step. You choke on a breath of air as you try to control yourself.

“Yejun.” His name drips from your trembling lips, absorbed into your jacket sleeve like your cries. “I miss you so much. Why did you have to leave us?”

A hand on your shoulder makes you flinch, jerking away from the potential comfort, despite it being exactly what you need right now. You crowd against the wall, knees knocking into one another as you huddle in on yourself where you’re sitting in the stairwell outside your apartment door.

“Hey, hey, hey, come here,” a strong, soothing voice coos. Your limbs protest weakly for a moment, your heart raging with guilt at the prospect of finding solace in another man’s arms—even if that man is Taehyung, your now late husband's best friend—but the desperate need for someone to hold your pieces together wins out. You fear if you let yourself truly break, you’ll never be able to be made whole again. You frantically launch into those open arms, keening a wail into the solid chest between them. “Shh, it’s okay. I’ve got you.”

💔💔💔

Two years later

“Mommy, are we going to Uncle Tae’s house today?” Sujin asks from behind you, where he’s strapped into his booster seat.

You glance in the rearview mirror, angling yourself so you catch a glimpse of his smile as he stares out the window, patiently awaiting your answer. It’s gotten easier over the last two years to look at him without growing weepy. He looks like and reminds you so much of Yejun. They have the same chestnut-colored eyes and floppy midnight tresses. When he smiles, the tiny dimple on his left cheek is a near mirror to his father’s and something that your eyes seek out every time he flashes you a grin. Little pieces of his father that fill the gaps in your heart.

“Did you not want to stay at Grandma’s tonight? That’s what you said you wanted yesterday,” you remind him.

Sujin hums like he’s thinking hard about your question. “Well, I did want to go to Grandma’s, but I also want to see Uncle Tae, and plus, he always has good ice cream. All Grandma has is boring vanilla.”

“How about we see if Uncle Tae wants to hang out this weekend? I think Grandma would be sad if you decided not to stay with her tonight.”

In truth, you’d also be a bit disappointed if Sujin changed his mind. Being only four when his father passed, he doesn’t remember Yejun much, mostly knows him from photos and stories he’s heard. So, it’s not surprising he’s not able to put together that today is the second anniversary of his father’s passing. He doesn’t know that tonight isn’t just about your mom getting a visit. It’s also about you having an evening to grieve without being under your son's watchful and inquisitive eye.

Though maybe you’re wrong, perhaps he knows more than you think as he responds softly, “It’s okay, Mommy, I’ll stay with Grandma so you can go visit Daddy.”

If it wasn’t for tightening your grip on the steering wheel, you might have driven right off the highway. “You know what today is?” you ask hesitantly once your initial shock passes.

“Of course I do,” Sujin says with another smile, his dimple catching in the afternoon sunlight coming in through the car window. “I might not remember him, but I could never forget him.” It’s a wonder there aren’t more six-year-old poets, as what he just said is easily the most eloquent thing ever uttered by a child. Your heart swells, and you feel that telltale burn in the back of your nose and behind your eyes as you blink away the flood of emotions threatening to spill into the open.

You nod, taking a deep breath. “That’s right. He’d be so proud of you and how much you’ve grown.”

“He’d be proud of you, too, Mommy.”

It’s another blow, directly targeting the cracks already forming in your armor. Fissures zip and snap over the surface of the wall you’ve spent the last two years building. “Thank you, buddy. I love you,” you manage to get past the lump in your throat. 

The rest of the car ride home is spent with Sujin telling you about his day at school and how one of his classmates snuck a salamander into the classroom after recess. You hum, haw, and laugh as he recounts the way the class reacted to the discovery of the amphibian.

It makes you feel lighter, listening to his words and hearing the clear whimsy his heart possesses as the salamander suddenly becomes a dragon and Sujin, the fearless knight that saved the teacher—the damsel in distress—by scooping it up and putting it in an empty lunch box.

“She said since I was so brave and such a good helper that I could go outside with Mr. Kim, the science teacher, and help him release it back into the wild,” he proudly proclaims. “Did you know salamanders like water? Mr. Kim said they’re kind of like frogs even though they look more like lizards.” Sujin continues on, spouting off facts he learned about the salamander from his science teacher.

It’s a short drive from the school to your apartment. You’ve often thought about moving, using some of the life insurance money from Yejun to buy you and Sujin a lovely place outside the city. But, your mom lives just a floor up, and it’s been convenient having someone so close to look after Sujin when you need them, like tonight.

Having your mom close by, not just as a babysitter but also as an emotional support outlet, has been a blessing and far outweighs the other feelings—the seemingly endless void that now lingers in place of your late husband. With that, though, you can’t help looking at your small apartment as more like a preservation of memories. It was the first place you and Yejun moved into after getting married. It’s the place you both brought Sujin home to when he was born. It’s still filled with so many memories…you’re not sure you want to leave—at least, not yet.

The building has no elevator, just several winding flights of steps right up the middle. “Go on up to Grandma’s. I’ll stop by with dinner before I leave. Remember, homework first before you play.”

Sujin gives you a beaming smile and nods his head in understanding before vaulting up the stairs, his strong six-year-old legs carrying him far faster than your own. You watch him disappear up the stairs—the last flash of his face so reminiscent of Yejun racing up those very same steps the day you moved in—followed by the familiar sound of your mother’s voice drifting out over and down the stairwell as she welcomes him into her space—a safe space, away from the looming cloud of darkness over you.

Knowing he’s occupied and cared for, you allow your mask to slip just a little. The weight on your shoulders eases as you let the emotional fatigue roll in and replace your typically calm and collected demeanor. Even after two years, it’s not gotten any easier when this particular day comes. The holidays are hard, sure. There are plenty of days where you find yourself feeling like it’s too much…but nothing truly compares to this day. It’s not filled with happy memories the way those other days are. It’s nothing but darkness. There is a constant ache in your chest, which is amplified when the calendar turns over, and you find yourself once again reliving that fateful day all over again.

You spent nearly every waking hour sitting beside Yejun, the uncomfortable, stiff hospital chair becoming your permanent perch. The ventilator was always loud, but the punching swoosh grew to be comforting because you knew that meant he was still there. All the lines and tubes hooked up to him made it look like a scene from one of those sci-fi films he enjoyed making you watch with him. Yejun was so full of life when you first met, many years before. But, the image stuck in your mind—the one you can’t seem to get rid of—is of him with sallow cheeks and pale, greyish lips, drained of life.

It’s weird to think of watching someone die. But that’s precisely what you did over the six months Yejun was in the hospital. The disease moved quickly, the cancer stealing your husband away bit by bit, and you were powerless to stop it. That’s probably one of the worst parts, the helpless feeling that no matter what you do, you can’t prevent it from happening. No amount of prayer, begging, or screaming would change it. He’d still die, just the same. Day by day, the best parts of the man you loved vanished, and by the end—you feel guilty even thinking the thoughts, so you push them out of your head. 

After unlocking the door, you step into the quiet space of your apartment. Your shoes join the ones discarded by the door before you drop your purse on the small console table against the wall and make your way across the living room to the hall leading to the bedrooms. Sujin’s room is the first door. You peek inside to see that he had made up his bed before school this morning. You make a mental note to grab one of his chocolate popsicles from the freezer before dropping off dinner tonight. He deserves a little treat for being such a good kid.

The small single bathroom sits between Sujin’s room and the larger of the two bedrooms, the one you shared with Yejun for almost five years. You haven’t changed any of the decor. Everything is the same as it always has been, right down to the pillow on Yejun’s side of the bed. It took months before you mustered the courage to wash the pillow case and cried the entire time you stripped the pillow and plopped it in the washer.

The pillow was small fish compared to the closet. Going through all of Yejun’s clothes nearly took you out. Thankfully, Taehyung was there to help. You weren’t the only one that lost someone two years ago today. Taehyung and Yejun grew up together and worked together for the last dozen years, starting out as teens together at Taehyung’s parents' florist shop. They are—were—as close as brothers, and not just for the fact that Taehyung’s parents took Yejun in when his parents both passed, but because of their unbreakable bond—a bond nearly as strong as the one you had with Yejun.

Taehyung has been there for you whenever you’ve needed him since Yejun’s passing. All it takes is a phone call or a text message, and he drops everything for you. You try not to take advantage of it because you don’t want him sucked into your empty void any more than he already is. No grown man should be attached to a woman like that, especially when he has no obligation for it.

But, you must admit, it’s nice knowing he’s there…especially today. This is the one day of the year that you know you don’t have to text or call Taehyung for him to show up. His one promise to you. He’ll be there, waiting for you at the cemetery, just like he was last year.

You pull off your oversized t-shirt and worn jeans covered in splotches of paint from your time in the studio today. Once a well-known local artist, you haven’t been able to create anything worthwhile since Yejun passed. He would always joke about being your one true muse. It seems he wasn’t wrong. Everything you’ve been able to create in the last two years feels wrong, like it’s missing something.

The life insurance you received from Yejun has been more than enough to keep you and Sujin afloat. However, you feel like a failure having even to touch that money, even if it’s just to pay the bills. If you could just get your life together, you’d be able to provide for yourself and Sujin the way you once did—before everything happened. Shoving that line of thinking away, you focus on the here and now, just getting through the next handful of hours.

A quick shower later, and you’re dressed in a warm sweater and a clean pair of jeans with thick wool socks. It’s cold, winter having well and truly taken hold outside, but when the sun goes down, the bite from the wind grows more bitter. Grabbing the large, lidded bowl of beef stew you had cooking in the slow cooker all day. You wrap it in a dish towel to keep from burning your hands on the hot sides, snag a popsicle for Sujin, and make the short trip upstairs to your mom’s place.

“Hey, sweetheart,” your mom greets you when she opens the door. She’s gotten a lot more grey in her hair in the last year or so. The steel-colored strands stand out against her temples, framing her strong but still soft face. You used to think she looked too austere, but then you realized that was just the permanent mark of motherhood and time.

“Hi, Mom. Did Sujin get his homework done?” You follow your mom in, shutting and locking the door behind you as she ambles into the kitchen on the other side of the living room. Her apartment is a near mirror of your own, her second bedroom set up for Sujin as well.

“He finished a bit ago and wanted to break out the paints. Was nattering on about some sort of lizard, I think. He wanted to try to paint it,” she explains, putting the tea kettle on without needing to ask. Peppermint tea with a dollop of honey can fix even the worst of woes in her eyes. She’ll insist you have some just as she has any other time she can feel your darkness crowding in. You’ve grown to appreciate your mother's intuition, both for yourself and your son's sake.

“There was an incident involving a student bringing in a salamander at school, it seems. Sujin helped the teacher and was allowed to go out with Namjoon—Mr. Kim—to release it.” You recall the conversation in the car, your mother chuckling softly when you tell her about the salamander turning into a dragon.

She busies herself, packing the tea steeper with her own blend of mint tea. Tending the small garden of herbs and spices that she keeps on the fire escape off the living room, is how she spends most of her days since she retired a few years ago. Even in winter, she keeps a small plastic greenhouse over them, opening it just enough to care for them each day. “So, you’re on a first-name basis with that science teacher now?” she asks. You can tell she’s lightly probing, trying to figure out if there is anything more between you and ‘Mr. Kim’.

“I met him at the beginning of the year when we had parent-teacher meetings. He insisted I call him Namjoon, that’s all, Mom.”

Humming, she grabs the kettle just before it begins to whistle. “Still, he’s nice?” she asks, casting you a glance over her shoulder.

You pull your bottom lip between your teeth, wishing she’d not try to go down this path of questioning. You know she means well, but you’re just…you’re not ready to think about those things.

“He’s nice enough, Mom, I guess. It was just a slip of the tongue. I’m used to greeting him at drop-off in the mornings. It’s not—I don’t, it’s just being cordial, y’know? I’m not ready…” you trail off, hoping your mom picks up on what you’re trying to say so you don’t actually have to say it; not today.

Her free hand goes to her mouth, covering her frown. “Oh, sweetheart, I didn’t mean—you know I’d never, not like that. I’m sorry. Forgive an old fool for her loose words.”

“It’s okay, Mom, really,” you offer with a tight smile as you set the stew on the counter and pop the popsicle you brought for Sujin in the freezer.

She sets down the tea, the cup slightly trembling on the tiny saucer she serves it on. “I made some pajeon to go with the stew. It’s warming in the oven. Are you going to stay for dinner?” she asks, seeing that you need to move on from the previous subject.

You settle on one of the chairs at her small dining table, pick up the tiny teacup, and blow across the surface before taking a tentative sip. The mint is a cooling contrast to the heat of the liquid, coating your throat with a soothing sensation. The blooming sweetness of the honey lingers on your tongue, helping combat the intense punch of the minty flavor. It’s comforting. Reminds you of home.

“I’m not all that hungry. You and Sujin enjoy it. You’re sure you’re okay taking him to school tomorrow?” She gives you a fond smile and nods. “I’ll pick him up on my way home and we’ll come have dinner.”

“That’s fine, sweetheart.”

You finish off the tea, suppressing a grimace as it goes down a little too warm and nearly scalds your throat. The sun will be completely down soon, and you’d like to get to the cemetery before it’s too dark out. “I should get going. Just going to say hi to him real quick.”

Your mom watches you stand. Her eyes are hyper-focused on your face. “Okay, sweetheart,” she says slowly. It’s clear she wants to say more, but you’re glad she doesn’t push.

The room your mom has set up for Sujin has a small bed pushed into one corner, leaving the rest of the space for him to play—unlike his room at your place, which has a writing desk and dresser taking up the majority of the play space. He’s never complained, though, choosing to get creative with the small room he does have. “Hey, buddy, Grandma said you’re painting. Can I see?”

You lean on the door jamb, peering into the room. The easel Sujin is using is angled away from the door. All you can see is smears of bright color peeking around the edge of the canvas.

His bright eyes meet yours as he grins extra wide. “It’s not done yet, but of course you can see it.”

Stepping in and around the easel frame, you take in the canvas covered in paint. When your mom said he was going to paint the salamander, you knew there was a possibility of said ‘lizard’ being portrayed as a dragon as it was in Sujin’s story in the car. But what you didn’t expect were the characters surrounding the dragon. You count them, six in total. The brunette woman at the top of the castle tower is clearly Sujin’s teacher, Mrs. Min. Sujin himself is astride the dragon, and who you think is Namjoon stands in a corner near some trees, his large-frame glasses are what lead you to believe that’s who it is. The other three characters are where you’re a bit lost.

“Who are these people?” you ask, gesturing to the other feminine figure framed by two men; one with unruly black hair and the other with small angel wings extending from his shoulders. It dawns on you the moment you ask.

“That’s you, Daddy, and Uncle Tae, of course,” Sujin proudly states. “You were in the tower with Mrs. Min. I’m rescuing her, and Uncle Tae is rescuing you while Daddy guides him.”

You’re not sure what to say. But you can’t help looking at your son in a different light. He’s only six, but in moments like this, you feel like his soul is older and wiser than yours. “It’s lovely,” you finally say, because it truly is, and everything else you could say would definitely start the waterworks, and there will be enough of that later. “I’ll be back tomorrow to get you. Be good for Grandma. There’s a treat for you in the freezer, but only after dinner, okay?” You feel like you’re running away—and maybe you are, but the darkness creeps in just a little bit further the more you look at his painting.

“Yes, ma’am,” Sujin beams at you sweetly. He lifts his chin, angling a cheek in your direction for a kiss. You plant one there, throwing an arm around his back for a quick squeeze, too. “Love you, Mommy.”

“Love you, too, buddy,” you murmur, shoving down the suffocating feeling bubbling in your chest—just need to make it a few more hours.

💔💔💔

The cemetery is about an hour's drive from your place in the city. Yejun grew up in the countryside, and the columbarium where he’s interred is at the cemetery closest to his and Taehyung’s childhood home. It’s a quiet drive, a typical Tuesday evening if it were any other week. You don’t even bother with music, haven’t in the last two years, preferring to just soak in the quiet and try to center yourself.

As you pull into the parking area outside the gate to the grounds, you spot Taehyung’s black SUV. He’s standing beside it, leaning against the driver's side door with his chin tipped down below the line of the thick scarf wrapped around his neck. Your headlights swing across his vehicle, illuminating him in the process as you park.

You take your time climbing out of your car, casting fleeting glances in his direction while you gather your courage and resolve. He’s wearing a thick grey-colored tweed coat that covers him to the knees, and khaki slacks lead down to shiny brown loafers. His hair is windswept, the fluffy waves moving across his forehead with every gust of chilly air.

“Hey,” you say as you swing open your door and step out. He catches your eye over the roof of your car and gives you a soft smile.

“Good evening. Drive okay?”

You nod. “Not too much traffic, which is always nice.”

“You should have let me come and pick you up.” It’s the same thing he said last year, to which you decline politely just the same as well.

“Thanks, but I enjoy the drive. Gives me time to think.”

His eyes flick over you, taking you in from head to toe. There is understanding clear on his face. “Shall we?” He gestures toward the entrance gate. You notice a small bundle of flowers held in his other hand that’s hanging by his side. “Oh, this is for you.” It surprises you when Taehyung offers you the flowers, having thought he was bringing them to leave in Yejun’s vase.

You take the offered cluster, automatically bringing it to your nose and giving it a delicate sniff. It’s hard to smell the fragrance in the cold, but as you peer down at the flowers and take in the deep purple and soft pink, the scent of lavender and hibiscus filters through as if on a memory. It’s a combination that reminds you painfully of Yejun, as this was always his go-to whenever he would bring you home flowers from the shop after work.

“Thank y—“ your polite words cut off as you hear the distinct crackle of paper as you shift the bundle of flowers between your hands. “What’s this?” you ask, holding the flowers up until you see the small envelope attached to the hemp string holding the bunch together.

“A note,” Taehyung responds slowly as if he’s trying to decide if that’s all he’ll say. “Perhaps wait until we’re settled to read it?”

You finger the crisp fold of parchment, wondering. “Okay, yeah,” you agree, chalking it up to most likely being a grievance note from Taehyung, and it might be awkward for you to read it right now in front of him.

The cemetery typically closes at sundown, but Taehyung has access as the gardener. When he and Yejun took over Taehyung’s parents' floral shop, they expanded the business to include landscaping for local companies and establishments. The cemetery is one such establishment they took on. He produces a key from his pocket, unlocking the small pedestrian gate that must have been locked up not too long ago, judging by the sun barely having dipped below the horizon.

“Moojin left about ten minutes before you pulled up,” Taehyung explains casually, confirming the thought you just had. “It’ll just be us, so we can take as much time as we need.”

Maybe you should feel bad that Taehyung gives you preferential treatment and access to the cemetery after hours, but it’s hard to care about that when other, darker feelings have you clutched so tightly. The walk to the columbarium is relatively short, being one of the newer buildings erected within the grounds just some twenty years ago or so.

“The trees are doing well, even in the winter,” you note, nodding toward the row of young pines along the fence line. It was one of the last projects Yejun worked on with Taehyung before he became ill.

“He’d be able to tell you all the properties of the tree that make it sustainable during this time of the year,” Taehyung responds, his voice carrying notes of sadness. Yejun doesn’t come up much in conversation between the two of you, most things not needing to be said, merely understood without a spoken word. So, it’s surprising and endearing to actually hear Taehyung talk about him, especially now.

You smile, knowing he’s right. “With enough scientific jargon to make you go cross-eyed trying to keep up, too.”

That earns you a soft laugh from Taehyung. “And he wouldn’t even realize it until you’re so lost you can’t even pretend to have understood.”

“I miss that,” you whisper with a sigh, your warm breath misting lightly in the cold.

Taehyung slips his arm through yours, hooking his elbow around the crook of your arm. “Me, too.”

💔💔💔

Taehyung

It’s never easy, watching the way you suffer through your emotions. Taehyung knows you try to hide them, and sometimes you’re successful. But others…like right now, he can read you as clear as a bright spring sky. Only instead of pastel blues, pinks, and yellows, you’re a stark monochrome of Pantone grey. Just as clear, but decidedly less alive. He hates it. Knowing just how vibrant of a person you once were. When Yejun left your life, so, too, did the color, it seems. Leeched away with the slow death of your husband. It’s a cruel fate, Taehyung has decided, and it’s one you never deserved. Yejun also knew this. He saw this in the way you mourned at his bedside, even before he was gone. It’s why Yejun made Taehyung promise to take care of you, to never let you forget how to smile.

As more time passes, Taehyung isn’t sure whether or not he’s done a good job by Yejun’s request. Not when the dark circles around your eyes seem to get more permanent every time Taehyung sees you. It’s why he brought the letter—the next letter. He’s curious if you remember the first one, the one that came the day of Yejun’s funeral; the one that had you crawling into Taehyung’s arms for the first time, seeking the comfort you knew was there.

That’s happened a few times in the two years since Yejun now. Any time you begin to fray at the edges and unravel a bit too quickly, Taehyung’s been there, weaving you back together the best he can. It might not be pretty, but a patchwork quilt is better than shredded rags, he likes to think. He hopes, at least.

“Are you warm enough?” Taehyung asks, realizing your arm is trembling around his. The jacket you’re wearing is far too thin, meant more for warding off spring rain showers than winter chills. Your lips are formed into a thin, bloodless line as if you’re trying to keep your teeth from chattering, and your brow is pinched.

The lift of your shoulder is subtle, dismissive and nonchalant. “I’m okay.”

“No, you’re not. Here,” Taehyung insists, pulling you to a halt on the walking path. “Take this.” He shrugs out of his jacket, draping it over the thinner trench you’re wearing over your sweater. You instantly relax, a soft sigh misting the air in front of your mouth.

“Thank you. I forget how cold it gets out here at night,” you mumble, encouraging Taehyung to continue walking toward the entrance to the columbarium, where Yejun’s memorial awaits. “Are you sure you’ll be okay without it?” Your eyes are round and glassy when you look up at him, the moonlight overhead reflecting in their depths.

The thick sweater Taehyung has on paired with his wool scarf is enough to stave off the wintery bite, but what warms him the most is seeing your eyes flash with a brief flicker of life when you snuggle into the depths of his jacket, bringing the tweed collar up around your neck after he assures you he’s fine without it.

Your feet shuffle, your stride slowing as you approach the columbarium. Taehyung can feel your hesitancy. The air around you is suffocating and full of static, something Taehyung wants desperately to help dispel.

“Come on. Together.” Taehyung offers you his hand, splaying his fingers wide in invitation. You lick your lips, eyes flicking between Taehyung’s face and his offered hand. Finally, you sag a little and slip your fingers in between his.

Your hand is soft and delicate in his. Taehyung has always admired your ability as an artist, being able to take your hands and a simple tool like a paintbrush and create something profound and breathtaking. Some might argue that what Taehyung does is also a form of art, but he swears it’s nothing compared to the pure magic you create. He’s found himself under your spell more than once, entranced by your art.

Even the works you’ve created in the last two years, the things you keep hidden away in your studio, are still quite beautiful—if more haunted. Taehyung knows you’re not selling any art and you haven’t hosted a gallery night in almost three years now. The few times he’s been inside your studio since Yejun, you’ve indulged his curiosity and let him look at the things you’ve worked on.

Taehyung cherishes those private moments you allow him within your space. He uses them as a time to reflect on what life has brought to you and to him. You have a shared experience of losing someone, but it’s clear you’re both working through your pain differently. Your studio, once a bright and vibrant space filled with inspiration and captured moments of love, is now more of a tomb, silent and full of the whisper of death.

Taehyung eases open the door to the columbarium. The motion-activated lights within flicker on and fill the space with a soft yellow glow. It’s better than the typical fluorescent white lights they used to use. Taehyung thinks the bright, sterile lighting is far too reminiscent of a morgue or hospital, not exactly places people should be reminded of when coming to visit their dead loved ones. So, he suggested the change when he took over doing the gardening for the cemetery.

Yejun’s niche is towards the back of the space, near the bottom. You separate yourself from Taehyung, letting the bundle of flowers droop upside down in your hand as you step lightly across the floor. You look like a specter, gliding across holy ground in search of what’s keeping you tied to this plane of existence. In many ways, Taehyung thinks that’s precisely what is happening with you. You’re suspended in time, stuck in a limbo of heartache.

In the two years since Yejun, you haven’t been able to move on, even though that’s exactly what Yejun wanted you to do. Yejun never wanted you to mourn him for long. He told Taehyung there was far too much love for you to give, and you had a heart big enough to love someone else while still holding true to Yejun. What Yejun failed to realize, Taehyung thinks, is that without Yejun, you didn’t want to love again.

Taehyung holds back a few steps, giving you some time to have a private moment as you kneel down in front of Yejun’s niche. The placard covering the niche is engraved with his name, birth and death dates, and a small metal frame that holds a glass engraved likeness of Yejun. It pains Taehyung to see the smiling face and crinkled eyes behind his wireframed glasses. Yejun was his brother in all ways, except for being born to the same parents. That didn’t matter to them, though—still doesn’t matter to Taehyung. They love—loved—each other just as fiercely as if they had been.

“Yejun,” you whimper his name, pressing a hand to the placard, head hanging low. Taehyung watches your shoulders shake with silent sobs, and he can’t take it anymore. He moves across the space and kneels down beside you, ignoring the cold that instantly leeches through the knees of his trousers. Before he can think better of it, he has his arms around you, trying to hold you together…trying to keep your seams from unraveling too fast.

Taehyung coos softly, murmuring as many words of encouragement and solace as can work past his quivering lips, “Shh, it’s okay. I’m here. It’s going to be okay. I promise. He loved you so fiercely. I miss him, too. I’m here for you. Shh, it’s going to be okay.” Over and over again, Taehyung repeats it like a mantra until your sniffles subside, and you slump into his arms, feebly returning his embrace.

Feeling your arms around him is a comfort, one that helps him keep his own tears in check. “Thank you for being here,” you sniff before burying your face in his scarf and inhaling deeply.

“I’m always going to be here for you,” Taehyung offers, smoothing a hand over your hair in what he hopes is a soothing fashion. He watched Yejun console you enough times to have a good idea of what might help. After Sujin was born, you battled postpartum depression for a while, and Taehyung helped wherever he could, giving him those brief glimpses into your emotional turmoil. Yejun always petted your hair and let you ground yourself in his embrace. He never even had to say a word; just let you draw on his strength. So, Taehyung has always tried to emulate that for you whenever you’ve needed him.

You sigh, and Taehyung reluctantly lets you pull away to sit back on your heels. “I’m such a mess. I’m sorry.”

“Hey,” Taehyung says, capturing the side of your face in one of his hands. You sway on your knees; big, round, red-rimmed eyes locked onto his. “Never apologize to me. You’re human, not a mess. Okay?”

“Okay,” you whisper, lips barely moving. You slowly turn, sitting with your back against Yejun’s niche.

“Okay,” Taehyung repeats, and settles in beside you. He barely notices the cold this time as it seeps through the seat of his pants. There are far too many fierce emotions rolling through him to be bothered by the chill.

“Is it okay if I read this now?” you ask after several moments of shared silence.

Taehyung looks over at you, fingering the small envelope attached to the bundle of fresh flowers he brought. He swallows past the thick knot in his throat, worried about you reading it but knowing you need to. Perhaps it’ll be best read when he’s around and not in the solitude of your apartment where you could fall apart without someone there to catch you; Taehyung knows Sujin is staying at your mother’s tonight.

He clears his throat. “Uh, sure, yeah.”

“They really are beautiful,” you say, voice so soft it barely carries to Taehyung. You admire the flowers for a moment, and the anxiety Taehyung had earlier in the shop when he was wrapping them goes away. He was worried that he got the flowers wrong. He knew Yejun always brought you fresh flowers, different types for different occasions. Yejun was all about the spiritual and emotional meaning of flowers, something that Taehyung hardly paid any mind to until after.

Finally, you tug the end of the string that attaches the envelope to the flowers, and you set them to the side. The flap is tucked into the envelope, so you slide it out and remove the tri-folded parchment from within. It looks the same as it did the day Yejun gave it to Taehyung a few weeks before he died. It’s the same as all the other letters waiting in a box under Taehyung’s bed—waiting for the right moment, waiting for you.

“If you need a moment—” Taehyung begins to say, but you hold up a hand to silence him. Slowly, you unfold the paper and smooth it over your thighs. Your eyes flick over the paper, snatching on random words until they hit the name signed at the bottom.

“What is this?” you whisper, yet your voice cuts like steel. “Is this a cruel joke?” You hold the paper up for Taehyung to see. At the top, it reads ‘For if you haven’t moved on’. Taehyung can understand why you might think so.

“N-no. It’s…there’s…” Taehyung pauses and takes a deep breath before trying again. “It’s not a joke. It’s from Yejun.” The look of hurt that ghosts across your face brings a prickling heat behind Taehyung's eyes, and he has to blink them several times to hold his emotions at bay as he explains. “The letter I gave you after the funeral?” He waits until you give him a subtle nod. “This is another he gave me…along with many others.”

“Many others?” you ask, incredulity seeping into your tone.

“He wanted to leave you something, something more than just your memories and heartache. So, he spent a few weeks, before he got bad, writing letters to you. He gave them to me and made me promise I’d give them to you when the time was right. This one—” Taehyung nods toward the letter held between your fingers “—was one I wasn’t sure if I’d have to give you or not. It was one Yejun specifically said to only give you if…well, if you hadn’t started living life again.”

“Hadn’t started living life again?” You balk at that, rearing back from him with an angry look pinching your face.

Taehyung feels like he’s botching this, not explaining it properly to you or something. “Just, just please read it.” Taehyung has no idea what the letter says. He never wanted to invade Yejun’s and your privacy. He’s hoping, though, that maybe the letter might hold some key information to help you understand…to help ease your anger in a way that Taehyung’s words can’t seem to.

You stare at Taehyung for a moment, and he’s certain you’re about to spit in his face and leave him sitting here alone. But, you finally shake your head and sigh, settling back into place and focusing on the paper. Taehyung is sorely tempted to try and read over your shoulder, but he doesn’t want to further your ire. So, he slides a few inches away, opening up a wide, cold gap between the two of you…and waits.

💔💔💔

To the love of my life,   For if you haven’t moved on Hi, baby. I hope this is a letter Tae never has to give you, but if you’re reading this, then that means we’re not doing so well. I say ‘we’, because I’m still there with you. Just like I promised in my other letter. I told Tae to use his discretion on whether to ever give you this or not. He knows you nearly as well as I do, so I trust him. So, if you ever read this, know he doesn’t mean any harm by it…I don’t mean any harm by it. But, baby, you gotta start living again. At this point, I don’t know how much time will have passed since I had to go away, but I do know you can’t let much more time pass. I need you to live, my love. Live for me, live for Sujin…live for yourself. No more standing by while the world continues to spin, you have to spin with it, baby, let it carry you away, and on to better days. Please. Find something that makes you laugh, find something that makes you smile…even if it’s a someone. I know you’ll always love me. There is no doubt about that. But, don’t let that love stop you from living. Let someone in, let someone help…love again, for me. Show the world that it can’t tear you down. Go on a date, go skydiving, go to one of those fancy art galleries in Italy you used to fantasize about…just go, baby. Go and do, and be free. Don’t be afraid…please, don’t be afraid to live. Love forever, Your Yejun

The memory of the other letter, albeit a bit fuzzy, drifts through your mind as you sit and try to come to terms with how you feel at this moment. You absently trace the neat scrawl of Yejun’s handwriting covering the page. Don’t be afraid. Are you afraid? Is that it? You’ve never thought of it like that, in terms of being afraid to live. But, if you think about it, you suppose that’s the root of it. You are afraid. Afraid of moving on. What if you do find happiness? What if you do find someone else? Yejun is clear that he’s confident you’ll never forget him, but what if you do?

You don’t want to be sitting somewhere thirty years from now, with your head thrown back, laughing at the joke from some other guy, with Yejun having not crossed your mind in years. It’s not that you don’t want to be happy. You just…you don’t know.

Taehyung is sitting so quietly beside you that if you closed your eyes, you’d think you were alone. Guilt pricks against your heart at how badly you first reacted, the harsh tone and words you lashed at Taehyung where he didn’t deserve it. You clear your throat, drawing the flicker of Taehyung’s eyes in your direction.

“I’m sorry, Tae. I really am. I shouldn’t have spoken to you like that.” The words are thick on your tongue as you work through the emotions threatening to obliterate your existence. You think you might cry, but give yourself an imaginary pat on the back when you manage to maintain eye contact with Taehyung while successfully blinking back the tears.

Taehyung is quiet for a moment, a muscle in his jaw working, flexing the dark stubble you can see shadowing along his jawline. It’s in this moment that you feel like you see Taehyung in a new light, with added clarity. He looks haggard, tired. You didn’t notice it before, the sunken circles around his eyes or the lack of a clean shave…until now. It’s not fair, you realize, that he has taken care of you so much the last two years when you haven’t even so much as bothered to check on how he is doing.

You’re just about to break the silence with another feeble apology when he smiles, it’s faint, but it’s there. “You don’t need to apologize to me. Yejun and I might have shared a different kind of bond than what you two had, but I have at least an inkling of the keen sting you’re feeling, the one that never quite goes away no matter what you do.” He brings a hand up and presses it to the center of his chest. “The one that slices a little deeper after the sun goes down and everyone else has gone about their lives.”

Chilled goosebumps pop up along your arms, despite the warmth from the added layer of Taehyung’s jacket. That is exactly what it feels like, a lingering sting that won’t go away, one that grows when you’re alone.

You lick your trembling lips, tearing your gaze away from his and focusing back on the letter clutched in your hand. “Yejun,” you whisper. “He—he wants…he wants me to move on.” A soft sob catches in your throat. “But, I can’t do that. How can I do that?”

Your shoulders heave as the emotions you were able to hold at bay before come crashing through the walls you managed to put up. It’s not like the weeping from earlier. That was simply the quiet cries of a mourning wife. This is bone-deep, soul-rending agony that shakes your entire body.

Taehyung pulls you into his arms, and you press your face into the cushioning of his scarf and scream. The sound is muffled, but you can still hear it echoing through the columbarium when all the air finally empties from your lungs. You try to replenish the air, sucking in stilted breaths, but it’s not enough. Panic ensues, your heart launching into a heavy, staccato rhythm as if trying to pound right out of your chest.

“Hey, hey,” Taehyung soothes. “Slow down. Try to breathe slowly.” He pulls you firmly into his lap. You’re heedless to the intimate position your body falls into with your knees on either side of his hips. All you care about is getting air into your lungs. Taehyung holds you by the face, angling yours so you look up into his worried eyes. “Come on, slow. In…out…like that, come on, another one. In and then out.” He breathes with you, exaggerating the way he inhales air through his nose and pushes it back out through his mouth.

His warm breath puffs across your face with each exhale, carrying with it the faintest sharp tinge of mint and the earthy tones of tea. Something that instantly makes you think of home. It helps bring you back to reality, slowing your rampaging heart, and subsiding your shuddering cries.

“I can’t do it,” you mumble.

“You can. You’re stronger than you give yourself credit for.”

“No, no. You don’t—I can’t. It’s…it’s cold in here,” you whisper, pressing a trembling hand over your heart. “No one wants that.”

A soft, sad smile forms on Taehyung’s face as he continues to stare down at you. “Good thing that I know a thing or two about keeping things warm.” He drops his hands from your face and grabs the lapels of his jacket that’s still draped over your shoulders and gives it a tug, pulling it tighter around you. You can’t help but smile, even if it’s a watery one.

“What would I do without you?” you ask, not expecting Taehyung to answer.

“You’d make it.” He sounds so sure. “I know you would, you’d do it. But, I am glad to be here, to help however I can.”

Taehyung doesn’t urge you off of his lap, just allows you to rest there with your cheek pressed over his softly beating heart, finding whatever comfort you can from the proximity of another source of warmth. His words linger there, filling the space between you with a comfortability that you know you’ll never find anywhere else. You don’t say anything else, as there isn’t much else to say. At least, not words you think you could say out loud. Not here, not now.

But, an hour later, as you’re driving home, you decide to try. So, you do something you haven’t done in a while and turn on the radio, letting the music fill the silence from before. It’s a small step, but a step nonetheless; the first of—you hope—many.

The next morning, with the light of a new day spilling through the gap between your bedroom curtains, you decide you feel…good. As you lay in bed last night, full of revelations about how you’re going to start making steps toward Yejun’s desire for you to be happy again, worry began to set in. Worry over whether or not you can do this. Now, though, you feel decidedly different—light, in a way—as you push back the blankets and climb out of bed.

With your mom having taken Sujin to school this morning, it afforded you some time to sleep in, which is something you haven’t done in years. You weren’t sure you were going to, considering how poorly you’ve been sleeping the last couple of years. It feels nice, stretching your arms over your head and not feeling as groggy for once.

There is one thing you want to do before heading to the studio, where you know you’ll probably just piddle around until it’s time to pick up Sujin, but it’s just baby steps for now. It’s not lost on you that your work, the art you create, no matter if you manage to move on or not, might still be something that you’re never able to recover. Yejun wasn’t far off when he joked about being your one true muse, but you try to remain hopeful that you can surprise yourself.

The box in the back of the closet is exactly where you left it almost two years ago. It holds some of your most treasured possessions. Things you’ve held on to dating back as far as your teen years and as recent as two years ago. You kneel in the bottom of your closet and slide the box out from behind the stack of empty shoe boxes you can’t seem to toss out.

It’s a bit faded, the blue exterior, once a brilliant navy, is now more denim in color. You’ve had the box since you were a child, given to you by your father the summer before he split from your mom. That really hurt your family, when he cut himself out of the picture without so much as an apology; he ran off with another woman. It was so hard for you to believe in love after that.

Lifting the small silvered latch, you ease open the box lid and sigh as your eyes land on the folded paper nestled on top. Yejun’s first letter. It’s the last thing you put in this box. The paper still feels crisp in your fingers as you delicately pluck it out and unfold it. You worry at your bottom lip a moment before letting your eyes devour the same words you read once before.

This time, they don’t hurt nearly as much. You still feel that piercing ache, but it’s accompanied by another, fresher feeling—one of hope. What stands out the most, now, though, is the confirmation that there are other letters waiting for you. Yejun says as much himself in this letter, you just hadn’t ever put the dots together, too distracted in your grief.

There are endless possibilities for what those other letters might be for. But, what’s clear is that you won't get another one until you do something to deserve it. Knowing Yejun, you have a few ideas of what those things might be. There is a thrill but also a sense of trepidation as you think about that. You want to move on and be happy again, and in doing so, you know you’ll get the other letters, but there’s also that sense of overwhelming dread.

Where do you begin?

You spent most of your day rearranging and organizing supplies at the studio. But, now that the sun is beyond its zenith and casting longer shadows across your paint-marked studio floor, you feel like you’ve done nothing but waste time. You still haven’t decided where to begin with Yejun’s letters and you’re no closer to coming up with an idea for your next project either.

With frustration coloring your thoughts, you lock up and welcome the reprieve of going and picking Sujin up from school. That’s one part of your life that you do know up from down with.

As you pull through the pick up line, you don’t see Sujin anywhere out front. You spot Mrs. Min ushering a few students to their cars, her friendly face sporting a smile as she does so. Her eye catches yours and she holds up a hand, rushing over to your passenger side window.

“Hi!” she says when you roll it down. “So glad I caught you before you waited too long. Sujin volunteered to help Mr. Kim with his terrarium and it’s taking a bit longer than expected. He should be out in the next fifteen minutes or so, feel free to park in the teacher’s lot or you can wait here if you’d like.”

“Mrs. Min!” a rambunctious gaggle of students call her name, requesting her assistance.

She gives you an apologetic look. “Sorry, duty calls. He shouldn’t be too long!” she calls over her shoulder as she jogs towards the cluster of students beckoning her over. One of the kids has what appears to be a large diorama that they’re having a hard time carrying to their car, even with the assistance of their friends.

“Well, great,” you mumble to yourself, checking your rearview mirror and seeing a long line of cars waiting behind you.

Pulling ahead, you slip around the side of the school and pull into one of the empty teacher spots and cut the engine. You haven’t been inside the school since the parent-teacher meeting at the beginning of the year, so it wouldn’t hurt if you went inside now, it would give you a chance to peek into Sujin’s classrooms and see what he’s been up to. If it’s one thing he loves, it’s learning.

Mr. Kim and Mrs. Min have adjoining classrooms at the end of the hall for Sujin’s grade, a storage and supply closet connecting the two rooms. The door to Mrs. Min’s room is closed but the light is still on inside. You take a quick peek through the view window on the door and see colorful drawings and paper projects hanging on the wall, books scattered across a few tables, and a large container of art supplies opened on her desk. She teaches English, Reading, Art, and History while Namjoon covers Math and Science. 

The gym teacher, Mr. Jeon, startles you as he breezes through the double doors at the end of the hall that lead out to the playground. “Oh, hey! Sujin, your mom is here!” he calls, stepping back and propping the door open with the heel of his sneaker.

“Mom!” you hear Sujin’s voice sound from through the open door. “You gotta come see this!”

Mr. Jeon holds the door open for you, his face lit with a pleasant smile. “A future scientist, I’d bet,” Mr. Jeon stage-whispers as you pass him and that makes your own smile blossom further.

“What’s going on, buddy?” you ask, taking in the scene before you.

Namjoon is crouched down beside Sujin, helping him sort through a collection of rocks spread out on a sheet of plastic. There are dozens of them, all various shapes and colors.

Sujin excitedly points out a few of the large rocks. “These would be perfect to create a hiding space!” he loudly proclaims before turning his bright eyes up to you. “Mr. Kim is letting me help him choose the rocks to go into the terrarium. We’re going to get our very own class salamander! Isn’t that cool, Mom? A class dragon!”

A soft chuckle comes from Namjoon as he pivots on his heels and squints up at you, the sun catching on the thick-framed glasses that are slipping down his nose. “We had so much fun yesterday talking about the salamander that was brought into Mrs. Min’s class that I couldn’t resist. I’ve had this old aquarium sitting in my garage for years, it just seems perfect.”

“Wow, yeah, that’s really cool.”

“Sorry for keeping him,” Namjoon suddenly stands, shoving his hands in his pockets and looking contrite. “I didn’t realize the bell had rung until Jungkook said something.” He turns to Sujin who is happily stacking a few of the smaller rocks into a pile. “I think that’s all for today, Sujin. We’ll finish it up tomorrow during class.”

Sujin frowns, his warm brown eyes flicking to Namjoon. “Okay,” he sighs.

“I tell you what, for all your hard work today, how about I let you be creative director during assembly tomorrow? Does that sound okay?”

The frown is quickly replaced with another excited smile. Sujin gives a whoop of delight and slaps his hands together before dusting them off. “Thank you, Mr. Kim, that sounds amazing!”

Seeing the interaction between Namjoon and Sujin gives you an idea, one that you hope you won’t regret. “Go grab your backpack, buddy, I’ll meet you outside Mrs. Min’s room in a second.”

“Yes, ma’am!” Sujin pulls open the door and scampers through, his sneakers squeaking on the tiled floor as he skips down the hall.

“Thank you for that, Namjoon, really. He was so excited about what happened yesterday and now this? He’s been wanting a turtle for a year now, so this will be a good test on whether or not we should get one.”

Namjoon pulls one of his hands out of his pocket and grips the back of his neck as he smiles shyly, his cheeks pinking slightly. “He’s a great kid, loves to learn. Though, turtles are a bit more needy than salamanders. It would also depend on the type of turtle. The standard box turtles are…” Namjoon trails off, his brow pinching as he throws furtive glances your way. “Sorry, you didn’t ask for a science lesson.”

That makes you laugh, which seems to ease the awkward tension in Namjoon. “Sujin isn’t the only one that likes learning.” You don’t intend the words to sound flirty, but they come out that way and you can distinctly tell that Namjoon keys into that.

“Yeah?” he asks, the shyness leeching away by the second.

“Um, yeah. Er, well, I should—” you jerk your thumb over your shoulder toward the door “—Sujin is probably waiting.” 

“Oh, yeah, of course.” Namjoon sidesteps over the plastic sheet of rocks and fumbles with the door handle before yanking it open. “Have a good—”

“Are you free Friday night?” you blurt, wincing at the rudeness of interrupting him but knowing if you don’t ask now then you’ll lose your nerve.

“Friday?” he parrots back, eyes wide behind his glasses.

Panic slices through and you immediately want to take it back. “Sorry, that was—I didn’t, it’s not appropriate is it? I’m so sor—”

“I’m free,” he states, the words silencing your backpedaling.

“Oh.” Now that he’s confirmed, you’re not sure what else to say. It’s been so long since you’ve done this.

“Is there something you wanted to do?” Namjoon asks hesitantly, clearly picking up on your trepidation.

You swallow around the choking feeling in your throat, the one that’s ingrained with the idea that you’re still married and still madly in love with another man and this is akin to cheating. “Maybe dinner? Or a late coffee? Um, or…I’m sorry, it’s been so long since I’ve done this.”

Namjoon gives you an easy smile. “Dinner sounds great. Let’s say, seven?”

“Seven is good. How about that new pizza place that opened up near the park, do you know the one?”

“I’ve had my eye on that place for weeks! That sounds perfect.”

Are you really going on a date…with Sujin’s Science teacher? “Okay,” you say, chewing the inside of your cheek as you take a few steps down the hall. “Great.”

“Great,” Namjoon confirms with a smile, his deep dimples making an appearance. “See you then.”

All you can do is nod, not trusting yourself with any more words with the influx of emotions now swirling through you. Sujin bursts through Mrs. Min’s door, his backpack and lunchbox in tow.

“Let’s go!” he trumpets, thrusting his free hand into the air in a fist. “I’ve got some homework to do before I can work on my diagram for the terrarium!”

Namjoon’s soft chuckle carries to you from down the hall as you usher Sujin towards the exit. You can’t help casting one last glance behind you, taking in the way he’s lazily leaning against the doorframe of his classroom. He’s quite handsome, there’s no arguing that.

A giddy feeling adds itself to the uncertain emotions rolling through you. A fluttering in your tummy that you haven’t felt in over seven years. You can’t help but wonder, as you load Sujin into the car, if this is really what Yejun wants for you or are you making a mistake?

💔💔💔

Taehyung

It’s a weird sensation when you expect to feel one emotion but end up feeling another. That’s what Taehyung thinks anyway, as he reads the text message he received from you for the dozenth time. You have a date. With Namjoon.

Taehyung has never met the quirky Science teacher, but he’s heard plenty of stories about him from Sujin. Charming, educated, and completely and utterly perfect for you. And that should make Taehyung happy. Yet, all he can feel is mild annoyance when he thinks about Namjoon sitting across from you at a dinner table making you laugh and smile.

He wants to chalk it up to being overprotective in a brotherly sort of way, but Taehyung knows better. It’s no secret—well maybe it is to you—that Taehyung cares for you deeply. Even before Yejun, Taehyung always had a soft spot for his best friend’s wife. Something that he drunkenly confessed to Yejun once a few years ago. Yejun took it goodnaturedly, something that Taehyung still thinks about to this day, and simply told Taehyung he understood the attraction because hell, who could blame him?

They never talked about it again, until the day Yejun asked Taehyung to take care of you and Sujin—the day he was given a box of letters addressed to you. Yejun had given Taehyung a knowing smile and said something along the lines of fate knowing and that’s why Taehyung already had so much love for you.

He wasn’t sure, at first, if Yejun had ever shared Taehyung’s little secret with you. But, as time went on, it was clear that he hadn’t. That, or, so lost in your grief, you’ve been keenly uninterested in that prospect. But, now, you’re going on a date and Taehyung doesn’t know how to feel about it.

The twinge of jealousy in his chest doesn’t sit right with him. He has no right to feel this way. It’s just something that he can’t seem to shake, hasn’t been able to since you told him about it two days ago. So, instead of expressing that, he forces himself to try and share in your joy.

That’s great. Let me know when you’re home, I have something for you.

A letter perhaps??

Your eager reply makes him smile despite himself. If anything, that helps his mood to improve. The ‘first date’ letter is already sitting on his counter, waiting.

Perhaps. Now stop texting me and go have fun.

There is no reply to that. So, Taehyung waits patiently, phone in hand. Hours pass in a mindless, sluggish way. He’s far too wound up to do anything productive but also has nervous energy that needs to be released. So, Taehyung spends the four hours it takes for you to finally respond by squeaking out haphazard notes on the alto saxophone he’s taken to trying to learn to play.

His phone lights up where it sits on the coffee table and he nearly drops the instrument in his haste to snatch up the device.

I’m home.

That’s all it says and it makes Taehyung frown. Not that he expected you to tell him how the date went over text message, but he was anticipating something more than just those two words. He is startled to realize just how late it is, though, being past eleven already.

Is it too late? I can always just swing by tomorrow.

Sujin is staying with mom. It’s not too late.

Taehyung is contemplating his reply when another text from you pops up that makes him drop everything else and grab his car keys, not caring it’ll be close to midnight by the time he pulls up outside your apartment. It was a knee-jerk reaction to also grab the letter that was sitting beside his keys, but now he’s thinking about whether or not it’s a good idea.

Those thoughts quickly fade as he focuses on the road, intent on reaching your apartment in record time. His phone sits on the passenger seat, still open to your text thread, the single word might as well be an alarm blaring to Taehyung, urging him on faster.

Please.

💔💔💔

As soon as you send the last text message you want to take it back. Not only do you feel whiny, but you know Taehyung will drop everything and come over which makes you feel terrible and like you’re using him.

But, fuck. The date was so horrible all you want to do is crawl into familiar, comforting arms and cry yourself to sleep. You’re about to pour your third glass of wine when there is a sudden knock on the door, followed by it swinging open. Taehyung stands there with your spare key in his hand, eyes wide with concern.

“Are you okay?” he asks, breathless as he clearly sprinted up the stairs to get here and now you feel infinitely worse for it.

You shake your head which earns you a pained sound from Taehyung but you hold up your hand, silencing him. “I’m not shaking my head no as in no I’m not fine, it’s more a I’m such a fool head shake. I’m sorry, Tae. I’m fine. I shouldn’t have said anything, I just—”

“I’m glad you said something. What happened? Do I need to go pay a certain science teacher a visit?” For all his bravado, you know he wouldn’t hesitate if you said yes.

“No, no. It’s not his fault. Well, not entirely. Look, I’m sorry you drove all the way over here.” You discard the empty wine glass in favor of taking a large glug directly from the bottle.

“Hey, hey,” Taehyung says, deftly taking the bottle from your hands before you have the chance to take a second gulp from it. “Stop apologizing and tell me what’s wrong.”

“It was a fucking disaster.”

If Taehyung is surprised by your cussing, he doesn’t show it. Instead, he stills beside you, brow slowly pinching and forming deep furrows between them. “Did he hurt you?” he whispers, but his tone is cold and hard. “I’ll kill him.”

“What? What, oh no, Tae, no. He didn’t hurt me, god no.” You sigh, propping your hip against the lip of the counter and wrapping your arms around your middle. “He was lovely, actually. I was the disaster. Or maybe we were. I don’t know, it was just a terrible night. A terrible idea.”

“Talk to me about it,” Taehyung encourages, his hands landing lightly on your shoulders to steer you toward the couch in the living room.

So, you spend the next hour recounting all the horrid details for him. Everything from the way Namjoon wouldn’t stop talking about rocks and mineralized dirt to the way he tried to kiss you at the end of the night only for you to duck and him to lose his balance, effectively making him face plant into the brick wall of your apartment building.

“See, it was a terrible idea,” you lament, letting out a frustrated sigh.

Taehyung hums softly. “It doesn’t sound like a complete disaster to me. Namjoon was polite, even if he did nothing but talk about his own interests. Did you try changing the subject, or did he ask about you and you gave a dismissive answer?” You give Taehyung an annoyed look. “I’m just saying, you have the tendency to avoid things like that. So, it’s only meant as a means to try and understand. Maybe it can be better next time.”

“There won’t be a next time.” You throw up your hands in defeat. “He said he had a lovely time, but I could see it plain on his face, he was just trying to be nice. He left with a bloody napkin pressed against his mouth for crying out loud!”

“Well, maybe he really—”

“But, most of all,” you continue, speaking over Taehyung, “I didn’t have a good time. I don’t want to do it again. It didn’t make me happy.”

That seems to subdue Taehyung. “Oh,” he says, nodding slowly. “Well, okay, that’s different.”

“I’m broken, defective.”

Taehyung scoffs, giving you a withering look a moment before dragging you into his arms, squeezing you tightly. “You’re not defective. You’re human. All this proves is that maybe the science teacher isn’t the guy for you. Simply just a lack of…chemistry.”

You can’t help but laugh at his bad joke. “You’re terrible,” you say in a lighter tone, meant to tease more than chastise. “But, you’re right, I guess. I just…this was the first date I’ve been on in a long time and it all went so horribly. It’s hard not to think that I somehow messed up, that I’m just…not right, just broken, y’know?” Taehyung’s eyes are soft as you look up at him, trying hard not to let yourself grow too accustomed to the comforting feel of his arms around your shoulders.

“You are perfect, most certainly not broken,” he whispers. You watch from beneath your lashes as a small crease etches across his forehead and you can tell he’s warring with himself over something before he slowly presses a soft kiss against the side of your head. “You just have to give yourself grace. I’m proud of you.” As he says that last part, he gently pulls back, hands resting on your shoulders. His right hand trails down your arm and you feel the soft caress of paper against the back of your hand. “Yejun would be proud of you, too, taking as big of a step as you have, I just know it.”

The envelope is small, but you instantly recognize the shape and feel of the paper. It’s just like the one you got earlier this week—like the one from two years ago. “Should I wait to read it?” you ask, not really expecting an answer.

“I’ll leave if you’d like some privacy.”

And in that moment you realize that’s the last thing you want. “No, please stay. Umm, that is, unless you have something to do.” It’s after midnight, the sour twist of jealousy rears as you think of everything that could possibly take Taehyung away at this hour. You tamp it down, knowing you have no right to keep him here, regardless. “I’m okay, I promise.”

Taehyung’s lip twitches as you wait for him to answer. He shakes his head. “No, I have nothing else to do. I can’t promise I won’t end up crashing on your couch, though,” he says, stifling a yawn in his elbow before lacing his fingers behind his head and stretching out. “I’m here as long as you need me.”

“Thank you,” you whisper, grabbing a blanket from the back of the couch and spreading it out over Taehyung’s legs before curling up on the opposite end of the couch. Taehyung shifts around the blanket with his feet, making sure the other end covers your legs as well.

“Don’t have to thank me,” he sighs sleepily. “I just want to make you happy.”

You’re not sure if he misspoke, because surely he meant only that he wants to see you happy. Because, as it is, him saying he wants to make you happy…well, that does something funny to you. Though, you can probably blame that on the terrible date with Namjoon or the half a bottle of wine you drank. Either way, you can’t help but smile as you look at Taehyung laying on the other end of your couch, eyes closed, and chest rising and falling with deep, even breathing.

You take a moment, running back over the date with Namjoon in your head, fingers idly moving along the edge of the envelope. It started out so nicely, Namjoon standing outside your apartment with a bouquet of flowers. They made your nose itch and your eyes water a bit from how overly fragrant they were—clearly some mass grown clippings from a supermarket—but you smiled anyway, appreciating the gesture.

Dinner was lovely, the new restaurant proving to be worth the drive and money spent. It’s perhaps your own fault for thinking Namjoon might pay for the meal and it didn’t hurt you any to pay for your own, but it felt oddly…impersonal? Less like a date and more like a business meeting or something. You’re not too old to be naive in the sense that women are just as capable of paying for dinner as men, as well as the fact that men shouldn’t hold the complete burden of expense on dates. It’s just…it was unusual and he didn’t even bring it up, simply told the waiter to split the check before it was brought.

It’s not helped by the fact that Namjoon wouldn’t stop talking about work or soil deposits. And perhaps Taehyung was at least half right in the fact that you didn’t put forth a lot of effort to change the subject, but the way you see it, if Namjoon was interested in knowing about you, he would have asked. Though, is that expecting too much? Are you being too harsh? Maybe you’re projecting and Namjoon really wasn’t that bad.

Before you can continue to spiral any further, you force your thoughts to the letter in your hand. Hoping it’ll put your ill heart at ease, you extract the folded parchment and smooth it out.

To the love of my life,             For after your first date Hi, baby. First, I want to say that I love you. Second, I hope he at least made you smile. If he didn’t bring you flowers or even those cheap ones from the supermarket, don’t think too much of it. I’ll let you in on a little guy secret, not all of us are well versed on flora and even less so on women. Even if it didn’t go so well, though I hope it did, you can’t give up. Go on another date, with the same person or someone else, you just can’t stop now. Take as many adventures as you can, do something spontaneous. You never did take that dance class you wanted to a few years ago. Paint, travel, explore the world. Take Sujin to places we never got to go. Just don’t stop, keep turning, even if it’s slowly. I’m so proud of you, you know? No matter what, I know you’re going to be okay. You’re going to make it. I can’t wait to see all you do. You’re going to be wonderful. You’re amazing, keep shining, baby. I love you so much. Forever With You, Your Yejun

Tucking the letter against your heart, you snuggle down in the couch, mind racing. You feel lighter somehow, like Yejun’s words have given you far more affirmation than you thought possible. The terrible date doesn’t seem so disastrous now.

“You okay?”

You startle at the soft question, thinking Taehyung was fast asleep. His eyes are barely cracked open, peering at you over his bent, blanket-covered knees.

“Mm, yeah. I think so,” you say after clearing your throat.

“Good…good,” Taehyung murmurs, his eyes falling shut once more.

“Hey, Tae?”

“Hmm?” His eyebrows raise but he doesn’t open his eyes. You take a moment to truly see him, the soft light from the stand lamp on the other side of the room illuminating him in profile. The soft curve of his cheek, the delicate slope of his nose, and the pouty bow of his lips aren’t new features, but you’re not sure you’ve ever truly paid attention to how breathtakingly handsome he is.

“Will you help me?”

Taehyung’s lips twitch as a mild frown turns down his lips. “Help you?”

“With whatever comes next.”

“Whatever you need, I’m yours,” he mumbles, a soft smile replacing his frown. You watch him for a moment longer, his lips going even softer as the smile fades with sleep. His chest rises and falls, your eyes tracking the motion in the dim lighting until you feel the pull of sleep yourself. Taehyung is the last thing you see before you close your eyes, and for the first time in over two years, you sleep peacefully; with a subtle warmth blooming in your chest where once there was only cold.

Next Chapter⇾ (coming soon!) ◅ Back to story masterlist  

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[7ndipity]

Jealous over your collab

Tae x Idol!Reader

Summary: Tae can't help but feel a bit jealous about your dancing with someone else.

Warnings: Jealous Tae, suggestive at the end, not proofread(when are they ever, lol)

A/N: Thanks to the lovely anon who requested this! Sorry uploads are a little slower rn, this week's been kicking my ass, but we're getting through it.👍

Masterlist

Requests are open

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“Hey, whatcha watching?” Tae asked as he found you sitting on the couch with your laptop, staring intently at the screen.

“I’m reviewing footage from today’s rehearsal.” You said without looking up.

“Is this for your collab?” He asked curiously. Lately, you'd been working constanly on a

special dance piece for an upcoming award show, but he'd yet to get to see any of it.

“Mhm, you wanna see?” You answered.

“Sure." He plopped down next to you as you restarted the video.

Almost immediately though, he began to regret his decision.

He knew you’d been working on the dance performance as duo with one of your labelmates, but he hadn’t realized that your partner was a guy, or that the vibe of the performance was going to be quite so... mature.

As the video progressed, he could feel himself tensing up more and more, trying to be analytical about the footage as you talked about sections that you thought needed improving or reworked, but all he could focus on was the amount of roaming hands and lingering touches that were sprinkled throughout the choreo.

"So, what do you think?" You asked, turning to him, your smiling faltering as you noticed his flat expression. "What's wrong? Is it bad? Did you not like it?"

“No, it’s good, really good.” He said, clearing his throat awkwardly. "What do you want for dinner?" He asked, changing the subject abruptly.

No further mention was made about the video or your collab until later that evening as you got ready for bed.

“So, are you and him close?” He asked suddenly, in regards to your partner.

“Uh, I guess? We were trainees together.” You said as you finished your skin routine.

“Is he single?” He questioned.

“I don't know, why?”

“No reason, just wondering.” He said, folding his arms.

You studied him for a moment from the doorway before coming to sit next to him, wrapping your arms around him as you did so.

“You know the only reason I’m working with him on this is because we’re labemates, right?” You asked him, rubbing his shoulder soothingly. ”You don’t need to be jealous.”

“I’m not jealous! Why would I be jealous?!” He protested.

You didn’t answer, looking at him pointedly.

“Okay, maybe I'm a little jealous, so what?” He said quickly. “I’m your boyfriend, I’m allowed to feel weird about some other guy putting his hands all over you!”

“It’s just a dance though, it doesn’t mean anything.” You reassured him.

“I know, but still.” He grumbled.

“And it’s only a few more days till the showcase.” You promised him, pressing a gentle kiss to his jaw.

“You did look really good.” He admitted, still pouting slightly.

“Thank you, baby.” You said, leaning up to kiss his cheek. "You know, yours are the only hands I like on me, though."

"Yeah?"

"Mhm."

"Think you could teach me some of that choreo?" He asked in a low voice, turning to catch your mouth with his.

"Gladly."

[bangtanintotheroom]

Model Behavior (M)

Still hooking over Still hooking over and die

• Pairing: Taehyung x Assistant!(F)Reader

• Genre: Idol!AU, Smut

• Rating: 18+

• Words: 3,181

• Summary: Helping with photoshoots brought you stress, excitement and a sense of validation. Today, you experience a new and unexpected emotion, thanks to the man at the center of it all.

• Warnings/themes: the Elle Korea photoshoot 😵‍💫, innocent touching (at first), flirting, eye contact, Tae in the open denim jacket ⚰️, making out, oral (m. receiving), a smidge of soft dom!Tae, Y/N using her teeth 🥴, restraining (with hands), cowgirl, semi-public sex, unprotected sex (a swift talk about BC and STDs is had!)

• Song Inspo: Quick Musical Doodles - Two Feet (Spotify | Soundcloud)

• Notes: When I tell y’all I am TIRED of this man wrecking me 🔪🔪🔪 I didn’t expect all of this from the Elle shoot! It got to me so bad that I started writing the beginning of this in the group chat… 🫣 Thank you to @minisugakoobies @sugalaritae @minttangerines for taking the ride to delulu land with me 💕💕💕 And thanks to @luaspersona for the helpful beta! 😚

• Taglist: @jimilter @joontied @jinsquishes @swweetnightt @minisugakoobies @minttangerines @sugalaritae @crisle19 @codeinebelle @ssaboala @kookprada @saweetspoiled @effielumiere @m1sss1mp

You're an assistant on the set of Elle Korea.

You've always been professional, especially since your position involved sprucing up the model at the time. From damn-near naked to partially covered, the human body never fazed you too much.

Until the day Kim Taehyung stepped into the room.

Your eyes were wandering.

Your responses were delayed.

Every time your fingers brushed against his sun-kissed skin, a spark began and traveled to the pit of your belly. And it didn't help that he had a tendency to look you dead in your eyes whenever you were in front of him.

His dark gaze penetrated you every single time.

But you managed to truck on and the rest of the shoot goes smoothly. Well, aside from the one time you almost missed your cue from the director, thanks to wishing you were the flower sticking out of Taehyung’s waistband.

Just as you were packing your bag, you felt a tap on your shoulder. You thought it was your boss and prayed that they didn't notice your slacking today; you had a cruise to go on next month. Opening your mouth with an apology ready, you spun around, only for it to evaporate.

For it was your distraction standing there.

"Hey. Y/N, right?"

Wait, he actually remembered your name? You were so used to 'the helper' or 'that girl' or 'you there' that the courtesy surprised you.

"Yes...Taehyung, right?"

A smile that lifted his cheeks came over his handsome face.

"That's me. Thank you for your help today, you work quick."

No Y/N, don't shuffle your feet like you're some shy schoolgirl.

Oops. Too late.

"Oh, thanks, but it's kind of what I have to do. If I was slow, I definitely wouldn't be here, haha."

You hoped you didn't sound too self-deprecating there, but it seemed to be okay as Taehyung chuckled.

"You have a point there."

Thinking that he was just coming by to pay his gratitude before moving onto whatever else million-dollar celebrities do, you were caught off-guard when he remained steady. For a few seconds, nothing was said as he continued looking you dead in your eyes.

Fuck, he needed to stop with that. Did he know what kind of power his deep brown orbs had?

"Y/N, listen. I need a bit of a favor before I leave for the day."

You blinked.

"You do? What is it?"

He shoved his hands in the pockets of his tight slacks, making the front of his open denim jacket part further, revealing more of that golden skin you kept eyeing up.

"I really liked these outfits. I wanted to see if you could give me the details on them so I could pass them along to my stylist."

Oh? You could do that. Anything to be around this gorgeous man longer.

"Of course! Just follow me to the fitting area, the bags have all the details."

Taehyung directed a box-like smile at you, nodding. You turned and motioned him to follow you down the hall and past people scurrying by with coffee trays and overflowing binders. Reaching your destination, you walked into the room with him, hearing the door shut behind as you made a beeline for the clothing rack along one of the walls.

You studied the cardstock hanging off of the first garment bag before speaking, "Okay, it looks like the red leather jacket you had was Valentino from the Fall/Winter 2023 collec—"

"Y/N."

You were interrupted by a baritone in close distance to your ear, turning your head to jump at how close Taehyung was standing next to you now.

"Y-Yes?"

His full lips curled into a crooked grin.

"I knew what collection that was from before I even got here."

Huh?

"You did?"

"Mhm."

A hand came up to hold yours, removing it from the paper.

That spark from earlier? Yeah, no, that was nothing, because his long and callused fingers against your smaller and somewhat dry ones lit a damn match inside you. And he only made the fire grow with the way his eyes lidded, looking so close to one of the shots that was taken earlier.

"Just wanted to get you alone."

Oh shit.

The air shifted thanks to his confession. The longer your gazes held, the more you forgot that you were at work.

You definitely shouldn't be alone in a dressing room with a famous idol. You definitely shouldn't be forgetting that anyone could bust in at any moment. You definitely should be reminding yourself about that cruise you still had to pay off. You needed this damn job and—

"Y/N."

A shiver ran through you. Damn, his voice.

"Don't think I didn't notice how you were looking at me the whole time."

Oops.

"I-I'm sorry, Taehyung, I shouldn't have been—"

Whatever else you wanted to say was halted when he pressed one of those appendages to your lips.

"Why are you sorry? You think I made you bring me back here for an apology?"

All you could do was stammer, looking undeniably stupid in front of someone who you deemed untouchable. Realizing you were at a loss for words, Taehyung took the reins and moved his finger before leaning down. You felt his wispy bangs brush against your forehead, eyes still on his smoldering gaze.

"If you're not averse to overtime, I'd like to see what's been running through this pretty head of yours."

Nope. This had to be a dream. Or a setup. Maybe that prick Kwan was trying to get you fired so he could get your position.

But...you didn't want to say no.

Licking your lips, you finally found your voice again.

"I...I don't want to get in trouble."

The idol didn't seem fazed, shoulders shrugging as he laid his hands on your hips.

"What happens in this room, stays in this room."

Ah. Well, that was what you would definitely consider a green light.

So you gave your own answer by grabbing the lapels of his jacket, tugging him in for a heated kiss. The next few moments were a blur.

There were hands roaming. His over your comfortable clothes that were starting to feel restrictive over time. Yours going straight for the warm, bare skin underneath the denim, doing your absolute best to remember every bump and dip. How many people would get to say they got to touch Kim Taehyung like this?

At some point, his back was pressed into the wall next to the rack, lips still ravaging your own. Your fingers went on autopilot for his belt, but as soon as you brushed the expensive leather, Taehyung broke the kiss.

"Hold on."

Uh oh. Did he change his mind?

You tried to stave off the disappointment coming on.

"What's wrong?"

He took your hands and pulled them away, but he never let go.

"I know how well these hands of yours work, baby—"

The smirk he gave you should have been illegal in over seventy countries.

"But I wonder if your mouth is just as talented."

Oh.

He had to have felt the way you trembled in his grasp. He had to.

"I mean...I've never had any complaints before."

Taehyung's eyes squinted at your sudden surge of confidence.

"Then don't be greedy. Sharing is caring."

Barely biting back a grin, you waited until he let you go before sinking down to your knees, coming face to face with a tent in his costly slacks. You began reaching for his belt again, only to feel a light swat to your hands. You gaped up at him in shock, only to quiver at the heat directed on you.

"I didn't say you could use your hands, did I?"

What had you gotten yourself into and how could you do it again?

“No, you didn’t.”

Taehyung’s straight teeth flashed dangerously.

“Don’t keep me waiting, gorgeous.”

While those few words rolled off his tongue, he took the opportunity to shift his hips closer to your face. You couldn’t hold back a swallow.

Hopefully, you wouldn’t make an absolute fool of yourself with what you were about to do.

You anchored your palms on your thighs, gripping lightly before you leaned forward, brushing your lips against the cool metal of his belt buckle. Praying that you wouldn’t get any marks on it, you took a hold of the leather with your teeth. You tried your best not to think of how stupid you might have looked, attempting to undo Taehyung’s belt this way.

But his word was absolute; no hands meant no hands.

Finally, you got somewhere, managing to release it from the metal prong before sliding the buckle away. This gave you access to his slacks now, relieved that this part would be much easier.

It was a good thing you only had lip balm on; any kind of stain on the expensive fabric would surely cause you to be reprimanded by your boss.

Your teeth loosened the button from its hole before going for the zipper tab, the sound of the fasteners undoing themselves like music to your ears. You went for his waistband as soon as you were finished, putting more force into your movement this time. With a sharp jerk, you pulled down enough to see a good portion of his briefs.

Just one layer left.

Taehyung seemed to be losing his patience, jutting his hips forward once again. Shooting him a reassuring look, you made quick work of the thin fabric. You barely had time to avoid his cock springing out and hitting you in the eye, face warming at the humored chuckle he gave.

Wanting to wipe the smirk off his face, your mouth engulfed as much of him as possible before giving a harsh suck.

“Shit—”

Lips curling around his length, you gave it your all, throwing in whatever tricks you were familiar with. Taehyung seemed to appreciate the effort, ebony eyes watching you like a hawk and filth-coated praises leaving his mouth.

“That’s it, baby— This what you wanted to do to me the whole day?”

Hopefully the way you fluttered your lashes got the message across.

“Goodness, I hope you’re not like this with every model you work with.”

Now your eyes narrowed, a hand coming up to swat his thigh on instinct. Unfortunately, you didn’t realize your mistake until Taehyung flew out to grab your wrist.

“What did I say, Y/N?”

Forgetting that your mouth was occupied, you began apologizing, but the idol was quick to stop you with his free hand.

“Give me your other arm.”

Your thighs quivered at the commanding tone covering the baritone now, obliging without a second thought. He wrapped his long fingers around your other wrist, keeping your arms up and next to his legs.

“Go on.”

You did not expect him to just take charge like that; the thought only made your pussy clench hard before you continued sucking him off.

For the most part, Taehyung let you do all the work. But sometimes his hips would come to life, taking a moment to give shallow thrusts into the wet heat of your mouth. The rational part of your brain freaked out whenever some of your spit threatened to leak out onto his pants while the horny part relished in the messiness.

Just before a large glob was about to slip past your lips, you felt him release your wrists and pull back to slide out of your mouth. While you were catching your breath, Taehyung helped you stand before walking you over to the couch on the other side of the room. He took a seat, keeping his legs spread as he tugged you by your hips to stand between them.

“Sorry to rush the fun, but my people are going to be looking for me soon.”

His hands already began working at your pants before the sentence was even finished.

“It’s fine.”

As soon as he opened the closures and yanked both waistbands down to your calves, you helped with getting them off your feet. He pushed his own clothing further down his legs and you straddled his lap, shivering at the sensation of his dick under your drenched core.

“You’re okay with this?”

Taehyung’s question took a second to sink in, but you nodded when it did.

“Yeah. I’m clean and safe.”

The man underneath you reflected the nod, hands sneaking around to cup your bare ass.

“Good. You don’t have to worry about getting anything from me, either.”

Your brows knitted jokingly as you felt Taehyung lift you up a bit.

“Are you sure? I don’t want to have to end up going to the media and letting them know that Kim Taehyung is carrying something.”

He merely chuckled, reaching down to guide himself to your entrance.

“And I don’t want to have to go to your boss and tell them about what went down in this room.”

Your mouth parted as you felt him begin to spread you out, words unable to come out until you were fully seated on his lap.

“T-Touché.”

Pleased with your acceptance, Taehyung took a hold of your hips and began pumping up into you. It was torture to have to hold back some of the louder noises you wanted to make, but you did not want to lose this damn job.

Guess you would have to show your appreciation another way.

Managing to balance yourself upright, you laid your palm on his chest, pushing the jacket aside to give you a better look at his torso. Your fingers roamed over the tanned skin, savoring the muscle and tone lying underneath. You took special interest in his stomach, enjoying the faint outline of abs that would show whenever he thrust up.

“Hey, that tickles.”

Your lips curled at Taehyung’s thick protest, sliding your index finger down to trace around his belly button.

“Sorry.”

He merely shook his head as you showed no signs of stopping your trek, digging his nails into your bottom.

“Sure you are.”

Taehyung made sure to get his revenge by pumping harder, forcing you to clap your free hand over your mouth, preventing a loud moan from escaping. He doesn’t slow down over time, fucking into you with abandon as low grunts left him. The model seemed content with watching you bounce above him for the most part. His dark orbs often switched between your face and where your bodies were connected.

The two of you continued until you felt that unbearable coil twisting in your gut, needing something extra to help it snap. Taking a chance, you removed the hand silencing yourself to grab one of Taehyung’s, sliding it between your hips. With a pleading look down at him, he nodded swiftly.

You were sure you tasted blood with how hard you bit on your lip when he started circling your aching clit.

But it was just what you needed, finding yourself getting to that precipice faster than before.

“T-Taehyung—”

Said man continued his movements, eyes steady on your face.

“Keep going, baby. Gonna make me come too—”

His admittance made your pussy quiver, but the excitement took a halt with a sudden thought you had.

“Wait, where are you gonna come?”

“I’ll pull out, don’t worry.”

Oh hell. If he did that, who knows where the mess would end up. While it would be unpleasant if it landed on your own clothes, any trace of semen on his own garments would cause a fiasco.

“Don’t, just— Stay inside, it’s fine.”

Taehyung gaped up at your words. It seemed like he wasn’t going to fight you though, not saying anything more. He let his hips do the talking for him instead.

With a few more steady thrusts and swipes over your bud, you saw stars behind your lids, arching your back and stifling down a cry in your throat. Your nails dug into the firm chest below, needing some sort of anchor as you rode out the tension. You almost missed the sight of Taehyung following behind you, watching as his face screwed up in bliss as ropes of release coated your walls.

His hips came to a stop after some time, his head flopping to rest on the back of the couch as he caught his breath.

“Fuck, that was good…”

You couldn’t speak quite yet, choosing to reflect the sentiment with an unsteady nod. The two of you took a moment to catch your breaths before you tapped his shoulder.

“We should probably get out of here now.”

“Ah.”

You were careful in pulling off of Taehyung’s dick, making sure nothing dripped out. Thankfully, a tissue box was nearby, allowing you to grab a few sheets to clean yourself up. You handed a couple to him as well.

Once you were done, you picked your pants and underwear off the floor, sliding them back on over trembling legs. Taehyung seemed to finish getting himself together at the same time as you, fastening his belt. He looked up at you with a grateful smile.

“Thanks for that, Y/N.”

You scoffed lightly, your own smile coming to the surface.

“I should be thanking you. When I woke up this morning, I didn’t expect to get the opportunity to fuck an idol.”

The taller man laughed at your quip, wispy bangs moving as he shook his head.

“Cross it off your bucket list. Who knows, we might see each other again in the future.”

Taehyung smirked at how flustered you became now, leaning down to plant a kiss on your swollen lips. He whispered against them, “Hell, I wouldn’t mind it. See ya.”

He didn’t even give you a chance to say goodbye, heading for the door. Shooting you a wink, he opened it before stepping out and shutting, leaving you all alone in the dressing room now.

Wow.

Did you really just sleep with the Kim Taehyung?

And got away with it?

A short laugh couldn’t help but come out.

Hopefully he was telling the truth when he said that what happened here would stay between the two of you.

Glancing at your watch, you decided to head back to the set to help break everything down. You walked over to the door and placed your hand on the knob.

A sudden realization froze your body and made your gut twist.

The two of you forgot to lock the door.

Motherfucker.

All you could do was sigh and shake your head before leaving; Taehyung better keep his pretty mouth shut.

©bangtanintotheroom, 2023. Crossposted to AO3. Do not repost to other sites or copy without permission.

[seulcaty]

  𐚁 ꫬ   ۪   namjoon ( bts ) lockscreen

[katnisspeetaprim]

Broad Day Light

Min Yoongi/Reader

Im so sorry if this is bad. i haven't had time to properly edit this. I've been sick again recently, but I wanted to get at least something out for you guys!

Warnings: Injury, crowds, anxiety, established relationship, idol!au

Word Count: 1203 M.list

Walking down a busy street in the middle of the day shouldn’t have been an anxiety inducing task, but here you are. That’s all it’s felt like these days.

You and Yoongi went public a few years ago and paparazzi and sasaeng’s had mostly started to leave you alone after a few months, just the odd personal space invader here and there, but you learnt to live with the new found attention.

Fast forwards to 2023 and Yoongi’s solo tour was well under way. With a world tour came massive media attention, and with media attention, came paparazzi.

You weren’t famous, so having people run up to you with cameras was a surreal experience.

You tried your best to shield your face, but it was to no avail as the group of photographers bolted towards you from across the road.

‘Y/N! Over here!’

‘Are you going to any of the shows!?’

The group of men had effectively blocked your path, not allowing you to leave.

‘Please let me through. I have somewhere to be...’ You mumbled and wrapped your arms round yourself as you kept your head down and away from the cameras. You started forcing your way forwards.

‘Y/N! Yoongi and Halsey have been acting close! Did something happen between them!? Is that why you aren’t on tour with him?’ You know you shouldn’t dignify these people with a response, but the gall of implying that Yoongi would cheat on you with someone that had become a good friend to the both of you... It was enough to make you rage.

‘Of course not! They are good friends, now let me through- Ah!’ As you forcefully pushed your way through the crowd, you didn’t realise how close you were to the curb.  Your ankle rolled, causing you to topple over into the road.

Your hands, arms and knees were all scratched up, along with a twisted ankle. At least no cars were coming so you wouldn’t get run over. Though that seemed like a more preferable situation than the one you were currently in.

‘AH!’ You shakily sat up and grabbed your ankle, causing you to hiss out in pain.

‘Please just leave me alone!’ You screamed out and swiped out at the paparazzi circling round you.

‘Hey that’s assault! She just tried to hit me!’ One of the men shouted out, trying to garner sympathy with his fellow low lives.

You were all but breaking down into a full blown panic attack, when all of a sudden you felt a wave of hope flow through you when you heard the shouts of police officers approaching the scene.

‘Hey! What’s going on here? Out of the way!’ They pushed through the crowd and one knelt next to you, whilst the other two pushed back the group, ultimately threatening arrests if they didn’t dispurse.

‘Miss? Are you ok? Are you hurt?’

‘My ankle- I think it’s twisted!’ You whimpered, trying to hold back your tears.

‘Don’t worry. We’ll get you to the hospital.’

Hours later and you were finally able to go home. With a lot of help from your best friend, you were now sat in your living room, feeling sorry for yourself with your poor ankle all wrapped up.

The scraped that littered your limbs weren’t too bad, just a little sore. Stories had hit the web pretty much immediately, along with plenty of videos of the incident, filmed by multiple people.

With any luck, Yoongi would be too busy to even think about going online...

-Incoming video call from Yoongles-

Ah well. There goes that idea.

After a slight hesitation, you pushed the green answer button.

Yoongi suddenly appeared on screen. He’d clearly changed out of his concert gear and was now clad in comfy sweat pants and a jumper.

And he looked pissed.

‘Hey Yoongi...’ You trailed off, trying to sound normal.

‘Seriously? You going to pretend nothing happened?’ He stared at you in disbelief.

‘You should have called me when it happened!’ He continued on, raising his voice ever slightly.

You looked away from the screen, feeling guilty that you tried to keep it from him. Of course he would see the articles, so it was pointless to even try.

‘I’m sorry...’

Yoongi  took in your defeated appearance and groaned internally for adding more upset to your already stressful day.

‘No, I’m sorry for shouting. When I saw what happened, I just got so angry.’ He paused for a moment before shaking his head. ‘You got hurt because of me...’

‘Yoongi no!’ You sat up straighter, trying to reassure him. ‘This isn’t your fault. At all!’

He nodded slowly, but you could tell by the look in his eyes that he didn’t believe you.

‘I’m going to send you the number for one of our bodyguards. If you need to go somewhere, get him to drive you.

Yoongi suddenly moved the phone in his hands. He was clearly texting you.

You couldn’t help but smile at your boyfriend.

‘Yoongi! I’m sure they have better things to do than look after me!’ His message however, had already pinged on your phone.

‘You got attacked in broad daylight Y/N. Seems pretty serious to me.’ Yoongi deadpanned as he stared you right in the eyes.

The smile fell from your face. You couldn’t argue with the fact that you would feel a lot safer with someone escorting you...

‘I won’t be going anywhere for a while. My ankle is all screwed up.’ You joked, trying to lighten the mood a little.

You didn’t get to see Yoongi often these days, given how in demand he was. The last thing you wanted to do with your precious time together was be miserable.

Yoongi smirked mischievously.

‘Maybe you’ll stay out of trouble then.’ You drew back in mock offense.

‘Excuse me!?’ Where has the compassion gone to?’

‘I’m sure you’ll survive.’ He said, trying to hold back his smirk.

You couldn’t hold back and began to laugh for the first time that day.

‘I wish I could be there for you’ Yoongi suddenly spoke over your laughter. You immediately went quiet, knowing that Yoongi was still upset by the days events.

‘It’s ok. This is enough, for now.’ You smiled gently and gestured towards the phone screen separating the two of you.

‘Remind me again why you couldn’t come with me?’ Yoongi groaned and slumped back in his chair.

‘You know why. I couldn’t get off work.’ You giggled as you also snuggled down into your chair.

He frowned before once again beginning to type on his phone.

‘What’s wrong?’ You enquired curiously.

‘I’m not there, but Tae will be close by tomorrow. I’m sending him to check on you.’

‘Oh my god!’ You exclaimed with a laugh. ‘I can’t convince you I’m fine can I?’

‘Definitely not.’

You and Yoongi spent a long time on call together that night, making the most of every moment.

It was only after ending the call for the night, did you notice Taehyung had sent you a message.

Hey noona! Hope you are ready for a home spa day tomorrow!

P.S, Please tell Yoongi-hyung I made you happy... He’ll kill me if I fail!

[yulixi]

𝘔𝘢𝘺𝘣𝘦... pt.1 | jjk

𝚂𝚞𝚖𝚖𝚊𝚛𝚢:Army has seen over time the beautiful friendship between the maknae Jungkook and the model Y/N.

But since the Y/N model began to share more photos, videos, and appear in some of Jungkook's live shows, a part of the fandom began to have doubts.

𝙿𝚊𝚒𝚛𝚒𝚗:Jungkook x fem!reader

𝙶𝚎𝚗𝚛𝚎𝚜:fluffy, cute, comfort.

sometimes i'm not good with english but i try to improve^^

But since the Y/N model began to share more photos and videos of them together, a part of the fandom began to have doubts.

@/Junggmaknae:It is clear that we have all seen those beautiful videos and photos of them together.

But that video that the beautiful model Y/N shared with us via instagram, I'm still not well after that beautiful video of them together.

+｡★｡+ﾟ☆ﾟ+｡★｡+ﾟ☆ﾟ+｡

The video begins with Y/N smiling at the camera, you could see that he was on the ground.

A few seconds later he could see the muzzle of a dog approaching his face.

She laughed as she felt the dog's tongue on her cheek.

"Look at this big and beautiful dog," said the model before sitting down and showing the well-known pet of the youngest BTS member.

It could be seen that she caressed it and how the dog got excited getting closer to her

"Uh? What are they doing?" the male voice was heard

"Just showing off Bam" Y/N laughed while looking at the young man

Some footsteps could be heard and how the singer appeared looking at the camera "hello" he said with a funny voice

And there the video ended but there was still a second video, Jungkook playing and jumping with Bam and in the background the model's laughter could be heard, the video lasted a few more seconds and soon ended.

That was enough for the fandom to start giving their opinions of the two of them...

+｡★｡+ﾟ☆ﾟ+｡★｡+ﾟ☆ﾟ+｡

@/Junggmaknae: OMG?!?!?! But that last video?

That video from now on lives in my mind permanently, I won't let it go

If you like it, give me a like and reblog ^^

[euphoricfilter]

hearts for dinner

pairing: yandere! taehyung x devil! reader

genre: fluff || smut || non-idol au || established relationship || yandere au

summary: how to wake up the devil

word count: 1.5k

tags/ warnings: fluff, mentions of death and murder, blood, yandere! tae, she does in fact eat hearts for breakfast lunch and dinner, eventual smut to come

notes: mother is back!!! with a mini series based off this idea!! and am fully open to questions about the au which can be turned into future drabbles :D

where you can find the rest of my work!!

.　 . • ☆ . ° .• °:. *₊ ° . ☆.

fingers tease the ends of your hair, taehyung tugging gently.

he lays on his side beside you, head propped up by his hand as he stares at your sleep stricken face. ever so peaceful, fragile and delicate, warm, entirely unaware of the world around you.

though he supposes even when you’re awake, he doesn’t leave much room for your mind to wander.

a man having tamed the devil herself.

filing down sharp edges and dissolving her poisonous touch until you’d become nothing but soft, warm, pretty gooeyness. tooth rotting sweetness. a heart wrenching loveable being hidden in human form.

tucked away from people. tucked away from civilisation, kept between the walls of the cottage with everything you ask for.

your own crafted paradise, taehyung the creator of your world. the pinnacle of your mind, the core of every thought and feeling.

your life solely his to keep, held in calloused hands, stained in the blood of hundreds. though those lives of everyone who passed, had a new purpose. the purpose of feeding you— taehyung’s only reason to live.

to keep you alive. happy and alive.

<3

you briefly register the ghost of a touch over your cheek, a loose strand of hair tucked behind your ear before warm, soft, lips press over the supple skin of your neck.

you turn, sheets tangled around your waist, noise of question catching in your throat as you slowly slip into consciousness. a gentle slide into the waking world.

“sweet dove” taehyung murmurs against your skin, pressing a kiss to your bare shoulder.

goosebumps prickle the skin of his arms as the scent of you sinks into his pores, the taste of you dancing across his tongue.

“hmm” you tug the blanket up higher, knees curling into your chest. utter warmth surrounding you.

he coos, “my little dove, i have breakfast for you”

you breathe out a long sigh, hands blindly reaching out for him, fingers pressing over his chest, trailing up his arms until your reach his neck, deft fingers curling around the necklace that dangles over his collarbones. your initials locked around his neck. a forever promise that he will never take off.

“can’t you smell it?” he brushes a knuckle down the line of your jaw, “i thought you’d enjoy it warm today… got too cold on the way home”

you peek an eye open, tongue wetting your bottom lip.

“you were gone all night” you croak, trying to pull him closer. quick to throw the blanket over his body to keep the warmth in.

“and how would you know that” he hums, “what time did you go to bed?”

you press your face into the pillow, words muffled, eyes slipping closed, ready for you to slip back into your own little dream world.

“i asked you a question, dove” he presses, arms slipping around your waist.

“6” you mutter.

“A.M. i assume” he presses on.

“mmhmm” you nod, “my gaming console died and i couldn’t be bothered to get out of bed to get the charger…”

a low rumble of laughter vibrates his chest.

“breakfast, then, i’ll tuck you back into bed for a nap. how about it?”

your eyes peel open, “okay” you nod, hands fumbling around under the blanket, looking for his hand.

your fingers wrap around his wrist, bringing it up to your face. you sniff, nose scrunching up at the onslaught of smells. apparent why’d he been gone so many hours of the night. because no matter how much he scrubbed his hands after, the sweet tickling scent of blood will never be missed by you.

“how many?” you wonder, and he smiles a toothy grin.

“enough to last you the week… that’s why i was gone for so long” he leans down, gentle kiss presses to your cheek in apology.

you sigh, leaning your cheek into his open palm “i missed you”

“oh darling” he croons, pulling you closer, face pressed against his chest.

you can feel the steady beat of his heart, the gentle rush of blood slipping through his veins.

“i think i may have missed you more” he whispers, words sweet like nectar as they drip off his tongue, “but i’m here now, just like how it should be”

“and you won’t leave?” you murmur, fingers grasping at his shirt.

“never”

“promise?” you swallow.

“you are my life” his fingers slip into your hair, tugging your head upwards to look at him, “we are forever. there is no end to us until the day our bodies decay, and even then you will never get rid of me. i am yours for eternity”

you nod, smile tugging at the corners of your lips “okay. what if i wanted to travel”

“then i’d follow” his answer is quick, no hesitation.

“and if i wanted to get married?”

“i am all yours”

your fingers skim over his cheek, “what if i wanted the stars?”

at this, he smiles, “i would venture far into the galaxy to pick you the most perfect stars, and name a constellation after you on the way”

“i would want to come with you” you tell him.

his fingers rake through your hair “i wouldn’t ever leave you behind”

you look up at him, silence stretching out between the both of you.

“what about—“ you start, though taehyung’s boisterous laughter cuts you off.

“anything. anything you ask for, it is yours. but first you need to eat, my little dove”

he peels the blanket off the both of you, whine of protest bubbling up your throat as the cool air of the bedroom caresses your skin.

“poor thing” he frowns, arms wrapping around you, pulling you up and off the mattress, “i’ll put the fire on while we eat” he hums, footsteps heavy as he trudges down the stairs, your arms wrapped around his neck

“hold on for a moment” he tells you, hoisting you up a little higher as he pulls out your chair at the dining table. gentle as he sits you down.

your bare feet touch the cold tiles, recoiling to press against your chest.

taehyung scuttles out of the kitchen, quick to grab you, your favourite blanket from the couch, wrapping it around your shoulders as he flitters around the kitchen.

your gaze wanders, eyes catching sight of the outside world. the vast forest seems never ending, darkness lurking just beyond the safety of the house.

“we can go out for a walk later if you like?” taehyung hums, “i have a new coat for you to try”

you turn to look at him, voice soft “i’m okay, thank you though”

he looks over his shoulder at you, holding eye contact. you feel your breath catch in your throat.

he tilts his head, turning back to the pan on the stove, “alright. tell me if you change your mind”

it’s only second after that he’s turning back to you, plate in hand.

you look at the heart, perfectly seared, puddle of blood still coating the plate even though cooked.

“let me know what you think” he smiles, taking the seat opposite yours.

you don’t bother with cutlery, fingers digging into the muscle, wet squelch of blood dripping down your palm, ever so warm. the tantalising smell of it enough to have yourself hungry.

“thank you” you look up at taehyung with a smile, and he simply grins, motioning for you to eat.

you bring the human heart up to your lips, tongue pressing against the muscle before your teeth sink into it.

you chew at it, molars tearing at the meat, swallowing down the metallic blood as it coats your tastebuds.

your fingers tighten around the heart. frown slowly pulling at taehyung’s lips, noticing how your cheeks don’t go rosy, he can tell your bloodlust is not nearly sated.

you drop the heart back onto the plate, not bothering that blood splatters onto the tablecloth.

“what’s wrong?” taehyung stands, taking the plate from in front of you.

“not good” you look up at him, bottom lip pulling into a pout.

“my dove” he kneels down before you, hand running over your cheek, “here—“ he stars, standing.

he moves towards the freezer, pulling the door open, then tugging the biggest drawer open.

“pick which one smells the tastiest, yeah?” he motions for you to look. freezer packed with individually wrapped hearts, the smallest shelf saved for his own meals.

“then i’ll cook you a nice breakfast, better this time” he starts, “then we can stay in bed for as long as you like, yeah?”

you nod at him, from still pulling at your lips, “please”

he smiles.

“i want something sweet for breakfast” you tell him, “something younger than the old piece of shit i just had”

“i should have known you wouldn’t like him… he was more my own indulgence than your dinner” he admits, “horrible man” it comes out barely above a whisper.

“taehyung” you call out to him as he rummages through the drawers.

he perks up, “yes, dove?”

“i love you”

and he can’t help the grim that stretches his cheeks, heart beating rapidly, locked away in his ribcage though so close to bursting through his skin. a heart full of awfully delicious love, ready for you to consume.

“and yet, i might love you more” he tells you.

[alphabetboyluvr]

sundae (kinda love) | kth

pairing: non-idol!taehyung x female reader - childhood friends, unrequited pining, missed connection

premise: you always thought kim taehyung's lips would taste like chocolate sundaes, but when you learn -through a friend- that he tastes like watermelon chewing gum, the illusion shatters. so does your heart. in time, so will his.

warnings: a lil angsty, big question mark on a happy ending? (it's an ending! i'll give it that much!), short n sweet, mentions of alcohol, clubbing, tae is stupid!, but also not to be blamed (or at least not until the end), insinuation of emotional affair, big regrets, ballroom dancing, no smut and no fluff

wordcount: 1.1k

note from holly: originally written as a submission for my old writing groups monthly prompt - "I wanted it to be you. God damn, I really did." This is ooooooold, but it just felt apt with love me again and rainy days. i also believe it's the oneshot that someone on wattpad commented 'why are the tae ones always so shit' so MAKE OF THAT WHAT YOU WILL! lmaooo.

minors dni // cross posted to wattpad

"Quick, quick, slow. Quick, quick, slow," repeats the familiar shrill of your dance instructor. "Nina, back straight! Namjoon, footwork!"

The village hall you're in is musty, dust particles imitating you as they dance in the sunlight that beams through the wide windows. It's a Saturday morning, and there's no place you'd rather be less. You're dancing with your best friend, Nina, because there are only three boys in your class of twelve.

There's Jimin, the star student; Namjoon, whose mother forced him to attend because she thought it would be good for him; And then there's Taehyung, their best friend.

He's only there because he has nothing better to do when his only buddies are too busy learning the paso-bloody-doble to hang out with him.

It's spring, and school is in full swing. They're growing, and as time lurches forward, they find themselves with less and less chances to enjoy one another's company.

And so Taehyung's shoes tap along the varnished parquet all rather naturally, much to the dismay of Namjoon, who really is trying his very hardest.

"Now! Turn!" Your instructor commands. "And switch!"

You throw Nina a look -one that she gives you right back- which you both understand to mean 'ugh'. Stupid switch you always think, and refrain from rhyming it with how you feel about your instructor.

There's no part of you that wants to hold hands with other random kids from your village as you Cha Cha Cha across the dance floor. You just want to spend time with your best friend.

The same can be said for Taehyung, but when the switch happens, he finds himself dancing with yet another random girl - Nina.

He glances over -checking who he stole her from- and when your eyes meet, he stumbles on his footwork. Nina giggles, and he looks down all bashfully; pink in the cheeks.

When he looks up, he's looking at Nina. She giggles again, and he gets a little shy, but he starts dancing with her like a duck to water. Something about them just seems to... work.

You suppose you should have seen it coming when the next week he asks to dance with Nina again.

At least, that's what you assume he's doing when he approaches the pair of you. She kind of just hops up and drags him away before he even gets a chance to ask.

When they reach an empty spot on the dance floor, Taehyung glances back over to you and purses his lips. His eyes are soft, and so wonderfully brown that you think he must taste like chocolate sundaes on a hot summer's afternoon.

You're fifteen when you watch from the sidelines as rosettes are pinned to their clothes.

Taehyung's in a suit - dark, a little too big for him. His bowtie is green; a congratulations gift from you, given on the night they smashed through regionals.

Nina is in a matching green dress. Pretty, hair pinned back, perfect. Just like always.

The village hall has been swapped for a convention centre in the heart of the big city. They've just won third place. Jimin and his partner snagged first. Namjoon didn't make the top twelve. He tried, though.

You're beaming, outrageously proud of their achievement - but when Taehyung's eyes find yours in the crowd, his smile falters. It softens after a moment, and he nods. You nod back. Smile. Whisper 'well done'. He grins, now, and Nina notices his line of sight on you, so she waves. You wave, too, but you'll tell her well done later.

When you're eighteen, in a bar in the heart of town, Nina tells you that Taehyung tastes like vodka lemonade and watermelon chewing gum. You don't see him that evening. He sends you a text as the sun begins to rise:

'Didn't see you tonight. Missed you tearing up the dancefloor.'

There's a smile on your lips, though you really wish there wasn't. You both know you've got two left feet. It was always Nina's thing.

You send him back a picture of the chocolate sundae you're nursing, and tell him that you hate watermelon.

He doesn't understand, and assumes you're drunk. You kind of are, legs slung over the side of a sitting room chair in your family home.

You mean what you say. Detest watermelon. Loathe it. Had been eating it the day before without a care in the world, but feel sick just thinking about it now.

You've loved the idea of Taehyung tasting like chocolate sundaes since you were a kid - but now you know otherwise.

It's ruined your perception of him.

Although it hasn't really.

Not in the slightest.

For when he shows up at your twenty-first birthday party without a gift, but a bottle of chocolate liqueur instead, you have to fight yet another smile.

"For all those sundaes," he says.

See, it's become a bit of a ritual.

Every time those pretty lips of his end up on Nina's -and he pretends to care about the fact you aren't around- a picture of a chocolate sundae lands in your message thread to him.

He still doesn't understand it.

Though he does smile when he sees them on menus, and he thinks about how much he'd love one whenever summer comes around. He never indulges, mind you.

Never.

Not until a few years later, when it's the only option for dessert in a gilded reception room, back in your hometown.

He doesn't think it's apt. It's autumn, not summer. Far too chilly.

It's been close to two decades since he first saw you dance - and you're still just as shit - but there's something beautiful about it, now. Maybe it's the flowers in your hair. Maybe it's the way you're looking at your groom, pink sunset pouring through the windows, fairy lights glittering above you. Maybe it's your dress.

Or maybe it's the way your eyes catch the light as you glance over towards him. He's holding your bouquet -Nina had palmed it off on him- and he nods. Smiles. The taste of chocolate is bitter in his mouth.

And only now does he really understand.

Because truthfully, he had wanted it to be you in that dreary village hall all those years ago, too.

God damn it, he really had.

Taehyung knows he shouldn't, but when he's had a few too many drinks, and your groom is off entertaining his friends, he sits beside you. You're watching your wedding party from the back of the room with a smile on your face.

When you look at him, you know -finally- he tastes like a chocolate sundae, now. Your smile falters. It's bitter. The sundaes are sweet, you assume. Haven't had one. Won't have one.

"Should've been you," he says so quietly it's almost a whisper.

You hate that you understand what he means. Hate that you nod. Hate that you're thinking about the way he tastes. Hate that your heart beats faster now than it did when you said 'I do.'

Hate that you say:

"Should've been us."