#tbh thinking thoughts about the symbolism behind these

[extraordinarilyextreme]

大理寺少卿游 / White Cat Legend (2024) eps. 11-12

[ineffable-romantics]

Some thoughts on why and how I believe Crowley and Aziraphale's relationship would incorporate sex/why I do not read them as wholly asexual:

This is something I've seen the most discourse about in this fandom, and I've had a few thoughts of my own that I really wanted to expand upon in a full meta/character analysis post. I do understand that this can be a contentious topic, so first, let me clarify a few things:

First of all, this is going to be long. Tbh it probably won't be that organized either. I ramble and I'm not very good at editing, so just... you know. Be warned. (*Hi, it's me from 2 days after writing this; I'm really not kidding, it's LONG)

These are all my own thoughts. They might not be hot takes, because recently I've seen more than a few people come to the same conclusions on a lot of these points as I have. But I've also had these notes in my drafts for about a week and a half now, and have been continuously adding to it as things have occurred to me. This post is essentially just somewhere for me to collect the separate but related meta I've been kicking around in my head.

I fully respect anyone who does see and prefer an asexual reading of this relationship. These are my own thoughts and interpretations as someone who is not asexual. I am in the LGBT+ community, so while I do know a few things about the asexuality spectrum, I am by no means an expert.

This is NOT something I expect, need, or even necessarily want the show (or, God forbid, Neil's tumblr ask box) to address. Tonally, it's just not that kind of show. Newt and Anathema's sex scene was very much played for laughs, and it worked for that reason. If the show found a way to address it in a way that was both appropriate for the tone of the show and ultimately satisfying, then great! But there is so much more to this relationship than sex, and I didn't need a kiss to confirm their love, so I certainly don't need a sex scene. As immortal beings (as I assume they'll stay) there is so much of the rest of their lives we'll never get to see. You can headcanon them as asexual and potentially be right. I can headcanon them as not and be equally potentially right. Again, these are just a collection of my own thoughts, because I think the question of sexuality (or lack thereof) is just as interesting a facet of these characters as any other.

Note: Tbh I've been second-guessing this whole post and debated deleting the whole thing several times for being silly or unnecessary, bc I don't want anyone to think that this is the only thing I care about when it comes to this story/characters. But if nothing else, it's inspired me to write in a way that nothing has in a very long time, so I've decided it's worth continuing, if for no other reason than that.

This is going to be a mixed bag of textual reading, subtextual reading, and a full-on reach or two. It's been a while since I've been in an English class, but if my teachers expected me to find a deeper meaning behind blue curtains, you can expect me to read too deeply into the symbolism of a loaded rifle or an ox rib. (This is probably not what my professors had in mind when grading my literary analysis papers but oh well) My point is, if it feels like a reach, I'm as aware of it as you are. I am in no way saying that all (or even any) of my points made were deliberate on the part of Neil or the actors or the writers or the directors. I am no longer the delulu Apple Tree Yard child of my youth, I promise.

If anything said here is in any way offensive or hurtful to anyone in the asexual community, please do not hesitate to message me or comment and let me know exactly what it was. I promise you it is not my intention to do so, and am happy to clarify or outright edit anything that reads that way.

With all that being said, let's talk about why I think Crowley and Aziraphale would absolutely fuck nasty incorporate sex into their relationship.

Note: I am out of practice with essay writing, so I think I'll just go down the bullet points of notes I have been making, and expand on each as best I can

Food

Where better to start than with Aziraphale's introduction to Pleasures Of The Flesh? (Just a heads up, this entire post may feel very Aziraphale-heavy, and with good reason).

This might be the least hot take here. We've all seen the Job minisode. We've all seen That Scene.

Whether this was intentional or not, the symbolism here is off the charts. Eve was tempted by an apple. So why not go a similar route and tempt Aziraphale with another fruit, or cheese, or bread, or literally anything else for his first experience with food? Instead, we go with a huge, glistening slab of fresh meat that he proceeds to absolutely go feral upon, moaning and gasping into his meal while Crowley watches with what definitely doesn't look to be disgust or even satisfaction with a good temptation. There's surprise at the ferocity of Aziraphale's appetite, certainly. But ultimately he looks to be intensely fascinated by it, while the thunder crashes, the music crescendos, and the earth literally shakes around them.

(It's also interesting to note how very little it takes for Crowley to tempt him with the ox rib. One murmured suggestion, a bit of unwavering eye contact, and vavoom Aziraphale immediately meets him in the middle.)

Cut to Aziraphale devouring the rest of the meat with Crowley splayed back on a makeshift bed, drinking wine and continuing to watch him indulge through half-lidded eyes. Outside a thunderstorm rages while they're learning secrets about each other in warm flickering firelight. It's cosy, it's intimate, and if they'd thrown in a bearskin throw blanket, it might as well be a post-coital scene straight out of Game of Thrones.

The next time (chronologically) we see them discuss food is when Aziraphale "tempts" Crowley with oysters in Rome. So Crowley first tempts Aziraphale with meat and then Aziraphale tempts Crowley with what is widely regarded to be an aphrodisiac. Interesting.

And then chronologically after that, the Arrangement begins to form, which has always reeked of a friends with benefits situation. Just to throw that in there.

It's What Humans Do

In the very first episode, we're shown Gabriel's obvious disgust and bewilderment towards Aziraphale eating sushi, calling it "gross matter" and being proud of the fact that he does not sully his body with it. Aziraphale initially tries to defend his own enjoyment in it, before passing it off as something that humans do, as something he simply has to do in order to blend in (which we know very well is not the case).

He does this again in season 2, passing off Nina and Maggie being in love as "something humans do". But it isn't, is it? Angels are beings of love, and can sense it, and understand very well what it is... up to a point. Even romantic love is obviously within their wheelhouse, given what we now know happened between Gabriel and Beelzebub (we'll come back to them).

What the "humans do" that angels wouldn't understand is messy, physical forms of love.

But here's the thing: Aziraphale and Crowley love doing what the humans do. They love drinking, they (or at least Aziraphale) love eating. They love music. Crowley loves driving and sleeping and watching rom-coms and sitcoms. Aziraphale loves reading and doing magic and earning little licenses and certificates for achievement in his various hobbies. They love to playact at being human so much that they've stopped playacting and started building a genuinely human lifestyle for themselves and with each other.

Once together in an unambiguously romantic sense, why do we think they wouldn't also want to explore one of the most prominent, intimate, powerful human expressions of love and desire with each other?

Angels, Demons, & Asexuality

Here's where I really want to clarify that in no way do I mean that sex is necessary for a healthy, fulfilling, and loving romantic relationship, or that the lack of desire for sex makes you any less human. Asexuality is a sexuality as valid and human as any. What I would say is that it is definitely in the human minority compared to allosexuality.

Angels and demons, on the other hand, are predominately asexual. Sexless/genderless unless Making An Effort. (Which, btw, is a concept introduced as early as the original book; why even bring it up as a possibility? Why not keep angels/demons being sexless/asexual as a hard and fast rule, if not to open up the potential for later use? Chekhov's Effort, if you will. And isn't that something that Aziraphale in particular is shown to do time and time again? He makes an effort in French and driving and magic, doesn't he?)

And this is why I don't believe Aziraphale and Crowley necessarily need to be asexual, narratively. There is already a huge amount of ace rep within the angels and demons (and no, not just the horrible ones. Muriel also doesn't "drink the tea" and has no reason or desire thus far to Make An Effort, and there are certainly other angels and demons who aren't horrible like the archangels seem to be who likely wouldn't Make An Effort either).

The central conflict for Aziraphale and Crowley is that they are on their own side, the ones who went native, the ones who are so different in so many ways from their respective hives. It would make sense for them to also break away from traditional angel/demon asexuality.

I say "traditional angel/demon asexuality", because I would also like to note that I would absolutely not rule out demisexuality for either of them. This post is being written to as a response to people who specifically believe that they (like the rest of the angels/demons seem to be) would be sex-averse in a relationship, and that it wouldn't be a factor in their relationship. I could easily read them as demisexual, but I do think there would be no real way of verifying this, because they've never been able to form as close an emotional relationship with anyone else but each other. Certainly not in heaven, and I can't imagine they would be able to form that kind of attachment with any of the humans, who they love and emulate but ultimately regard as the separate species they are. So yes, they could either be allosexual or demisexual, in my opinion.

Then again, now that I think about it, Making An Effort itself could be a great metaphor for demisexuality, since they would be entirely sexless/asexual until they have enough of an emotional connection with someone to consciously manifest otherwise. Since the other angels and demons don't generally form those types of emotional connections with anyone, there hasn't been a precedent for it.

Except...

Brielzebub

We do have a precedent for it now, don't we? Gabriel and Beelzebub fell in love. They are a direct foil for Crowley and Aziraphale's relationship, speedrunning right through their courtship and finding their happily ever after on the other side of things.

For being such a 1 to 1 comparison, it feels deliberate that they did not kiss. They held hands, they were gooey with each other, but they did not kiss. That feels like such a deliberate thing to omit when you know what's to come at the end of the episode between Crowley and Aziraphale.

And going back to the food = sex metaphor for a moment, let's notice how even as they fell in love over the years, even when pints and crisps were there on the table in front of them, they never felt the desire to reach out for them. They didn't need to. It's a date (love story) even if you aren't eating dinner (sleeping together).

Yes, I know Jim liked hot chocolate. No, I am not counting it because I don't consider Jim and Gabriel to be the same person with the same proclivities, and Jim was highly suggestible at the time anyway.

Gabriel and Brielzebub's big happily ever after moment (as of now) was one between two asexual supernatural beings. They did not need to kiss to drive the point home. They showed what Crowley and Aziraphale could have, if they would only acknowledge it.

Crowley & Aziraphale's Dissatisfaction

But they do have that already, don't they? If you really think about it, what do Gabriel and Beelzebub do with each other that Crowley and Aziraphale don't already? They hold hands, they spend time together, they create little rituals, they give gifts, they're visibly and verbally affectionate with each other, etc. They are more or less already in a romantic asexual marriage relationship with each other, aren't they?

And it doesn't seem to be enough for either of them.

At the beginning of the season, Crowley is immediately shown to be unsatisfied with the way things are. Obviously part of it comes from living in his car, but it seems to be more than that (especially since Aziraphale makes it clear that the bookshop is just as much Crowley's as his, implying that he could have been living there the whole time and is choosing not to, for some reason?). You could argue he's feeling unmoored without Hell telling him what to do, but isn't that what he wanted? Isn't that what he still wants, by the end of the season? All season long, he's never indicated the desire for a new job, or a new project. He stopped the apocalypse because he wanted the freedom to openly spend time with Aziraphale, to spend his time on Earth however he sees fit. Until Gabriel arrives, he has exactly that (minus a flat).

So where does the dissatisfaction come from? And if it represents anything to do with his relationship, what does he want out of it that he isn't getting already?

I think Crowley only really comes to the realisation of what he's missing when Nina names it for him, not only putting them in the category of romantic, but physical (outright asking if they are sleeping together). These two posts [1], [2] go into more detail about what I mean, but I think it really pushes him into acknowledging that their relationship is more human than either of them have stopped to consider, and what that might mean as far as everything a human relationship can entail.

After all, Nina and Maggie only advised that he should talk to Aziraphale, make clear his feelings. The decision to kiss him, to tip them over the edge from nonphysical to physical, that was all him. And no, kissing isn't sex, but I wonder how taboo even that might be in the kind of all-encompassing asexuality most angels seem to identify with. (If they're disgusted by food and drink, I can only imagine what they think of snogging, much less sex.)

Aziraphale doesn't have this moment of someone observing their relationship from the outside. He loves Crowley, and as of 1941 probably even knows he's in love with him in a way that Crowley doesn't understand yet. Which makes sense, since love is technically his job, he'd be more likely to recognise it for what it is.

However, Aziraphale's reference for romance and relationships is Jane Austen. It's chaste. It's dancing and dinner and doing sweet things for each other and roses and candles and handholding. He contextualises his love for Crowley in that soft fantasy sort of way, where it's there, it's obviously there, but it's neat and easy and unspoken. Not to quote Glee in this, the year of our lord 2023, but it's all very "the touch of the fingertips is as sexy as it gets".

Someone should tell that to Aziraphale's face, then.

I'm not going to pretend I know what Michael Sheen's script notes were, but there were definitely some Choices™ made. Because yes, there were plenty of moments in both seasons with Aziraphale looking at Crowley in a sweet, loving, smitten way. And then there were moments that were yearning.

But yearning for what, exactly? All of those sappy Jane Austen tropes already apply to the two of them. So why are there moments where Aziraphale is looking Crowley up and down like the last eclair in the window and licking his lips and visibly exhaling like he's trying to get in control of himself (see: Bastille scene + Crowley telling Muriel to ask him if they have any other questions about love)? Why is Aziraphale not only unconcerned when Crowley shoves him bodily up against a wall in s1, but staring at his lips and a beat too late in noticing Sister Mary's arrival? Why are some of his lines so suggestive? I'm sorry, but the car ride after the church explosion might as well have been the beginning of a Pizza Man porn with a really weird Blitz theme. If even my mother picked up on that vibe, I can't imagine it wasn't intentional on part of both the dialogue and the delivery.

(This section may feel like more of a reach/joke, but I'm really only 20% joking. These are writers and actors who are EXTREMELY good at their jobs; they know what they were doing here.)

More importantly, I don't think Aziraphale is even aware that there is more to what he wants. He lives in the Jane Austen fantasy and it never even occurs to him that he might be interested in anything further. It never even occurs to him that, as an angel, there is anything further to be interested in in the first place. Until Crowley forces it to occur to him. Just like I believe Nina forced Crowley to confront the idea that romantic love is what he's been feeling all along, I believe Crowley forced Aziraphale to confront the idea that physical intimacy is something he's been wanting, without even realising.

Aziraphale's Hedonism

Expanding on Aziraphale for a moment. We talked about his relationship with food, but we all know that Aziraphale is defined by his love of things that Feel Good.

It isn't just that he and Crowley love human things. Aziraphale loves the best of the best, or at least his version of it. He doesn't just love food, he loves going to fancy restaurants. He doesn't just love clothes, he loves soft, cosy, warm, plush clothes, or shiny, flashy, bougie fashion. He loves the warmth of tea and cocoa, loves getting drunk, and sitting in a comfy chair in the sunlight. He doesn't just experience, he indulges.

Given the emphasis put on things that Aziraphale loves just because they Feel Good, it feels narratively strange to assume that he wouldn't enjoy the feeling of being touched, or that he wouldn't be willing to try it, at least once, with someone he cared very deeply for. And just like the ox rib, I think that once he gets the first taste of things, he would absolutely tip over into complete and utter self-indulgence.

Dancing

I also think that dancing could be construed as a huge metaphor here. After all, we're told flat-out that angels don't Dance. Except one.

I would argue that Aziraphale, in fact, Made An Effort to learn how to Dance. He threw himself into the gavotte with delight (at a Victorian gay club; noted) and worked hard to be good at it. He's chomping at the bit to Dance with Crowley, working up the nerve to ask him with undeniably romantic intent and eagerness. So, angels don't Dance... unless they Make An Effort to do so.

We are told that demons, on the other hand, do Dance, but not well. Makes sense, since they're the ones who would want to encourage a deadly sin like lust, but have as little understanding of human love and physical intimacy as the angels. Crowley, however, is shown to be an excellent dancer at the ball, especially in his compatibility with Aziraphale.

(But Aziraphale WandaVisioned the ball so everyone knew how to dance! Yes, he did. However, the rest of the brainwashing doesn't seem to affect Crowley in any way, and they did actually live through the time period where this sort of dancing was a social norm; I'd be surprised if he never needed to learn. After all, the demons can't spell either, and Crowley is at least functionally literate, as far as we know.)

As of today, it's also been confirmed that when Aziraphale asked Crowley to dance, Crowley replied with "you don't dance." Not "WE don't dance". So going along with the metaphor, Crowley is just now discovering that Dancing is something Aziraphale is interested in at all, much less with him, and not denying that he himself is interested in Dancing. In his defense, I believe he was asleep for a few years while Aziraphale was learning the gavotte, so he wasn't exactly aware of Aziraphale's hot girl summer.

Love Languages

I want to expand on that; Crowley and Aziraphale's compatibility. Specifically in regards to their individual love languages.

We all know Crowley's love language is Acts of Service. I don't think there's any debate there. He loves it, Aziraphale loves it, they're both aware of it, we're all aware of it, God and Satan are aware of it, no surprise there.

You may disagree with me, but I believe Aziraphale's love language is Physical Touch, for a number of reasons. One of which being his aforementioned hedonism. Aziraphale likes things that Feel Good, remember? He likes soft clothes, and well-worn books. Neil himself has said that they like holding hands. And any time he is taken by surprise (Brielzebub getting together, the wave of love in Tadfield, etc.) what is the first thing he does? Reaches out for Crowley. He stops him with a hand to the chest in the pub. He leads him by the hand to the dance floor. He guides him by the waist in the graveyard. He reaches out during the entire Brielzebub scene, whether he can reach Crowley or not. Despite his own turmoil, he grasps at Crowley's back during the kiss.

The one time Crowley reaches out for him (not counting the kiss yet; we'll get there), he is aggressively pushed against a wall (by someone he loves and trusts) with a complete and utter lack of concern (and perhaps some interest, depending on how you read it).

And when he isn't reaching out for anyone, or there isn't anyone to reach out to? Well, he's wringing his own hands together, squeezing his own fingers, as if to find that physical comfort in himself.

So. With that theory in mind, we have Aziraphale (Physical Touch) + Crowley (Acts of Service). Throw in 6000+ years of deep love, cherished companionship, and forcibly repressed longing, and there is a very real potential of this combination resulting in fierce sexual compatibility. Where Aziraphale would want to touch and be touched, to indulge in physical pleasure with someone he adores, in the same the way he indulges in every other fine thing in his life. And where Crowley would want to indulge him in return, to give him everything he wants, and to take pleasure in Aziraphale's pleasure, in the same way he enjoys watching him take joy in food everything else.

So Aziraphale is an angel who is insecure about his own less-than-holy desires, who would want to treat Crowley like a luxury to be touched and cherished and adored. And Crowley is a demon who has, over the millennia, been unhappy about how they've been forced to deny even their friendship with each other, who would want Aziraphale to feel comfortable and safe and encouraged to indulge in earthly delights. That sounds like a stunning recipe for sexual compatibility to me.

"You said 'trust me'" / "And you did"

Just like the Job minisode, the Blitz is RIFE with symbolism (intentional or otherwise). This one will be quick, but I did want to touch on it because I thought it was interesting. Maybe I'm reaching at this point, but I'm assuming you read the tin.

First of all, Crowley not wanting to admit to never firing a gun before; comes off as someone who very much does not want to admit to their crush that they're a virgin ("You must have done this lots of times!" / "Umm.... yyyyyeah.")

(You could make the argument that Aziraphale having a firearms license and a Derringer in a hollowed-out book is symbolic of him not being a virgin while Crowley is. I disagree, for reasons I'll go into later, but it's a valid reading. However, I see it more like keeping a condom in your wallet; it's there in case you need it, but the opportunity has not yet risen no pun intended.)

More importantly, the theme of this entire minisode is trust. We already know they trust each other with their lives against the rest of Heaven, Hell, and the world. But specifically, this is about the importance of having complete trust in your partner in a charged, physically vulnerable, intimate moment, where the only danger is between the two of you.

Aziraphale needs to believe Crowley would never hurt him if he can help it. Crowley needs to trust Aziraphale's unwavering blind faith in him. Frankly, it all feels very symbolic of two people deeply in love losing their respective virginities with each other.

The trick is a success, and they share an intimate candlelit dinner in which they reaffirm their faith in each other. Aziraphale also begins to voice his agreement with Crowley, that maybe Heaven's rules shouldn't have to be as black and white as they are, and that there are benefits to... blurring the lines, shades of grey, wink wink (at which point even my mom was like, whoa guys, this is a family show).

Btw also: Can we all agree how much it looked like Crowley was getting ready to get a lapdance in that one scene? You know the one.

Also also: "Aim for my mouth"? Come on.

The Birds & The Bees

Now that I think of it, there's also something to be said for the fact that Crowley and Aziraphale are both obviously familiar with where babies come from (how they're made and how they're born) while the other angels aren't.

Something something Aziraphale and Crowley fundamentally understand sex and reproduction in a way the other angels (and probably demons) very much do not, nor have any desire to.

Probably not important. Just thought it was worth mentioning.

The Kiss™ & Religious Trauma

The Kiss. Where to even begin?

This has definitely been the hardest one to start, because there is so much going on here that I definitely won't be able to cover it all, and will certainly miss a few things here and there.

Aziraphale's reaction to the kiss afterwards is the most interesting to me. And I don't mean directly after, I don't mean the "I forgive you" part. I mean the way he touches his lips when Crowley is no longer in the room and he no longer needs to save face, when he is completely alone. Had it been directly after the kiss, it would have been rightfully read as horror, or disgust, a shield to discourage further action.

It's not. It isn't just a touch, it's a press. As desperate and angry and unexpected and imperfect as the kiss had been, Aziraphale is pressing it into himself, recreating the feeling as best he can. Beneath all the poor timing and shock and hurt from their fight and fallout, I think it's fair to say that it was something he enjoyed. Something he doesn't think he should enjoy, something that Feels Good that he only allows himself to indulge in when completely alone.

Remember, Aziraphale's idea of love is Jane Austen and gentleness and courtship and fantasy. If he'd ever even considered kissing an option, it might have been gentle pecks, cheek kisses, forehead kiss, hand kisses. Soft, safe, chaste affection.

Crowley's kiss turns all of that on its head. He introduces physical intimacy in a very real, very messy, very human way that I don't think Aziraphale ever even considered could apply to them. Considering what other angels are like and what they look down on, even Aziraphale's Jane Austen fantasies probably would have been considered taboo.

So for their first kiss to be rough and desperate and passionate in the way it was, of course he was confused and in shock. It was deeply physical, and as overwhelming and awful as it was in the moment, it Felt Good. Enough that he grasped at Crowley and kissed back, if only just for a moment, before stopping himself. Enough that he actively pressed it into his lips afterwards, in private, to remember.

I adore how Neil has decided to evolve these characters past the first book/season. More so in this season, Aziraphale and Crowley have both become such interesting allegories for queer people on either side of the spectrum of toxic religion. Aziraphale in particular obviously, because he is the side that so desperately wants to believe, to make a difference, and to unlearn all of the propaganda he's been fed over such a long time. Just like so much of organised religion, there is so much that he is told, time and time again, that he should not want, that he is silly or stupid or outright wrong for wanting. It reminds me so much of the severe Catholic guilt one might feel for wanting/engaging in sex for the first time, and the stigma of being queer layered on top of that.

What is so critical to Aziraphale's character is that he goes on wanting, and more than that, actively pursues. He was convinced to go up against Heaven and Hell and stop all of Armageddon because he wanted to go on listening to music and eating lunch and reading books and enjoying the simple company of the person he cares most deeply for, even if that person is supposed to be the enemy.

All this to say that if angels are as generally asexual/sex-averse as I believe them to be, narratively speaking, it would make sense for Aziraphale to be singular in that regard as well. Mirroring his first experience with food, it would make sense for Crowley to be the one to first introduce this new messy, physical, human dynamic between them, for Aziraphale to hesitate (obviously we are at the Hesitation phase at the moment), and then (eventually) for him to dive in wholeheartedly, to absolutely glut himself on this new thing that Feels Good. It would make sense for his character development to show him overcoming his metaphorical Catholic guilt and pursuing the sexual intimacy most (if not all) of the other angels would scorn.

(I can't help but remember that plot idea Neil described from the unwritten sequel, with Aziraphale in a hotel room trying to watch a full porno by way of the free 2-minute teaser clips so he wasn't technically sinning by paying for it. I so hope this is used in season 3, because gosh, I wonder why Aziraphale would suddenly be so interested in observing human physical intimacy after 6,000 years. Lonely and doing a little surreptitious research there, angel?)

Crowley, on the other hand, is the queer person who has broken free from his toxic religion. He prides himself on being his own person, on their his own side. He doesn't have the hang-ups Aziraphale does. He doesn't worry that he's going to be judged or cast aside for wanting things he's not supposed to. So it only makes sense for him to be the first one to suggest/initiate physical intimacy. It makes sense for him to be the one who "goes too fast" (another fantastic example of this dynamic beginning as early as s1; what is that conversation in the car meant to represent, if not Aziraphale being overwhelmed by the intensity of their relationship, and his fear of succumbing to it when he believes he shouldn't? It's also interesting that this is the first conversation to take place in Soho, just after watching Aziraphale realise he's caught feelings for a demon, with the red glow of lust serving as the backdrop).

Do I think the kiss in and of itself was sexual? No. I think it was a passionate and devastating last-ditch effort on Crowley's part to convey the way he feels for Aziraphale. Not just that he loves him, but that he loves him in the most human way possible. But I do think that the kiss represents how they can move forward from here, and what they might want to explore with each other once they feel free enough to do so.

In Conclusion

I am sure, deep in my bones (unless we are explicitly told otherwise), that this was both of their first kisses no, I'm not counting the gavotte, and that neither of them have ever thought to do anything else physical with the humans while they have been on Earth. Like I said before, they adore the human race and lifestyle in general, but ultimately view them as a separate species altogether, and they seem mostly happy to keep to themselves and each other, unless otherwise necessary. I just can't see either of them being drawn enough to a human to pursue anything close to sex. If Crowley in particular has had anything to do with sex in the context of temptations, I'm positive he would be inciting lust amongst the humans themselves, not involving himself directly. At least not that directly.

So, like every other human experience they've had on Earth, sex is something new that they could explore together, just the two of them, on their own side. A deeply intimate, tangible declaration of their love and everything they've gone through to earn it. A visceral finger to give both Heaven and Hell. A renewed appreciation for their corporations and for each other's. A enjoyable method for immortal beings to simply pass the time in each other's company. A new and exciting way to Feel Good, and all the variations that come with it.

You might agree with this post, or you might not. Whether this is something that is ever addressed or not, it doesn't matter to me. This is a brilliant love story either way, and I genuinely feel so privileged to witness it.

But I just can't find it in myself to imagine, given everything we know about these two characters, that sex isn't an experience they would both consume with wholehearted enthusiasm, curiosity, and profound, ineffable adoration.

___________________________________

Bonus feature: the very silly notes I made to myself that inspired this post

[kazz-brekker]

hotd episode thoughts

listen, as someone who enjoys some good dragon drama, i feel fantastically well catered-to by this episode

the confrontation between rhaenyra and addam was fun, i liked that it's apparently kind of inspired by western face-offs but with dragons instead of guns

that conversation between larys and ironrod while they were watching aemond sentence men to the watch definitely implied to me that, unlike with his brother, the council is so wary of/intimidated by aemond they don't even want to talk to him about possibly important war developments. which does not bode well for team green's stability in the future, tbh

jace stop being mean about mysaria that's your mom's girlfriend you're talking about :(

i did find the conversation between rhaenyra and jace really interesting, i hadn't considered that the sowing of the seeds plan might bring out so much of his insecurities about being a bastard. he and rhaenyra have probably the most functional parent-child relationship in the show, but they really DON'T talk about this aspect of his life at all, and it really shows

oscar tully unexpected mvp of the episode perhaps? holding his own against that whole council of river lords…calling daemon loathsome…making him execute willem blackwood to atone for spurring on those war crimes…king shit!

i enjoyed getting to see viserys again, i've really missed his actor this season and seeing daemon's reaction to his ruined face was quite interesting

daemon you are SO close to realizing that you don't actually want to be king and would make a terrible ruler, i'm rooting for you to figure this out by the season finale

the scene with aegon and larys talking was probably my favorite from last week so i really liked that we got a follow-up on it. very impressed that aegon is capable of walking even the tiniest amount after what he's been through

rhaena running off into the mountains…she's getting that dragon by hook or by crook

ulf trying to get out of claiming a dragon by claiming he had an injury made me laugh

i like that hugh and ulf have totally different reactions to being possible dragonseeds, one boasting and the other hiding it

alicent was serving real ophelia by john william waterhouse vibes this episode

loved that the dragonkeepers had a huge fight with rhaenyra over the sowing of the seeds, they're in the background of so many dragon scenes but we've never gotten much perspective on what they think of dragons or the targaryen right to claim them before

i do admit to saying "wow, those are some toasty boys" out loud when vermithor was torching those poor dragonseeds

love love LOVE that we got to see both vermithor and silverwing this episode, they look so cool and i love their distinct designs

i have been waiting ALL SEASON for the payoff of hugh and ulf claiming those dragons and it was such an exciting sequence, you could really feel the adrenaline and the danger the whole time

ryan condal on the inside the episodes comparing the death of the dragonseeds to ritual sacrifice was also super fun symbolism

another daeron mention, hi daeron and tessarion :)

also house beesbury making problems for the hightowers, love to see it

after aemond has spent so much time this season intimidating and terrifying other people it WAS super fun to see him do a hard swerve into fear when he saw how many dragonriders rhaenyra has now

that final shot of rhaenyra standing on the dragonmount with syrax, vermithor, and silverwing behind her DID get to, i must say. it's house of the dragon! and we have the dragons!!!

okay yeah i am super hyped for the finale and whatever it may bring, seems like it's gonna be epic. the triarchy! the dragons! the riverlands! helaena in the war effort, apparently?! what fun!

[cookinguptales]

(via @goofygooberton)

tbh the one detail I want to talk about most is Guillermo taking off the cardigan that his grandmother gave him before he let Derek bite him.

Like -- him taking off his clothing before letting Derek bite him lends itself well to the sex/virginity metaphor I already talked about, but the fact that Guillermo specifically said that his grandmother got it for him... That opens up such a can of worms.

I want to come at this detail from a couple different angles, actually. That's how important I think it was. I think that the cardigan represents Guillermo's humanity, his family, and his slayer lineage. He wants to take it off -- but he also wants to protect it.

To start with, his humanity. Guillermo's sweaters have always kind of been a symbol of how... unvampiric he is. They're soft, they're cozy, they're not exactly fashionable. He stopped wearing them as often as he started delving into his slayer side and when he started being on more even footing with his vampiric family, but he's gone back to wearing them more often again.

I feel like Guillermo is often trying to Make A Point with his clothing, tbh. He wore smart, effective, professional (and attractive) clothing as a slayer. He wore flashy, expensive clothing to try and show off his power, money, and influence once he started embezzling from the club. But sweaters are his comfort clothes, and as he stops feeling the need to prove himself, he seems to revert back to what makes him most comfortable.

So him insisting on removing his sweater first, again, feels like Guillermo getting out of his comfort zone. It's him purposefully divorcing himself from his humanity before allowing Derek to turn him.

But... he still wants to keep those clothes safe. He still hasn't left humanity behind him all together.

Which brings me to the second point. Family. Guillermo very specifically brings up that this cardigan was given to him by his grandmother, the de facto head of the family. She loves him dearly, and, lbr, has been known to make not-so-subtle statements via her cardigans.

(Remember the rainbow cardigan at the family dinner? I sure do.)

Guillermo has really struggled with balancing his relationships with his family and his relationships with the vampires. He's in a very fragile place right now where he knows that his family is a danger to the vampires he loves (and vice-versa) and that they would not accept his choice to be a vampire. He literally told them what he wanted and saw it go to absolute shit. But they don't remember that now, so he's been able to maintain this tenuous peace between his two families.

But... has he really thought all this through? He's made the decision to become a vampire, and how will that affect his relationship with his family? The transformation doesn't seem to be working correctly, possibly because of his bloodline, but he's not quite human anymore, either. Is he far enough gone to set off their killing instinct? Hard to say, but I bet we'll find out.

So when Guillermo takes off a cardigan that his grandmother gave him to prevent it from getting stained with blood, it feels like he has chosen to distance himself from his family, but still desperately wants to hold onto what little relationship they might have left. He doesn't want their relationship to be permanently stained.

But I can only assume that his sweater, like every other inch of that room, probably got very bloody indeed.

So... is it a losing battle, trying to keep his relationship with his family safe and blood-free? Is it, like that sweater, doomed to destruction despite his best efforts?

Hard to say!

Finally... the whole slayer thing. The thing that's come between Guillermo, the vampires, and his family for all this time. Guillermo didn't want to be a slayer, but has come around to the realities of his bloodline. But he still doesn't want it to get in the way of his transformation. He removed the sweater that his vampire-slaying grandmother gave him before he was bitten, just like he's trying to remove his human bloodline altogether.

But... it's not so easy to get rid of your blood, is it? Even when you spray about 10 gallons of it all over the back room of a gas station. I think that blood is probably still interfering with the transformation, but I guess we'll get more information on that later.

The most interesting part of all this to me, though, is like... okay, so Guillermo's sweaters represent the parts of him that he wants to shed during this transformation, but that he simultaneously can't quite stand to let go of. But in the same episode, Nandor specifically asks Guillermo to wear a sweater.

Like sure, he calls it shitty -- but he doesn't want Guillermo to wear the flashy, expensive clothes that Guillermo wore to impress his family and boyfriend, or the neat lines of his professional slayer wear. He wants Guillermo at his most comfortable and his most himself. He wants Guillermo in a sweater, the nicest one he has. He wants Guillermo to be the nicest version of himself. He doesn't need Guillermo to take anything away from himself; he just wants to change him into the best version of what he already is.

The real question here for me now is... is this because Nandor is still uncomfortable thinking about Guillermo's transformation? Is that why he's still insisting on Guillermo wearing his sweaters? Or is it just that this is the version of Guillermo he likes best? The comfortable, sweet, soft version of him? The Guillermo that brushes his hair and pats his back and talks him down when he's scared?

Does he want Guillermo to keep wearing his sweaters because he, like Guillermo, associates them with his humanity? Or is it because he associates them with Guillermo's happiness? Does he want Guillermo to be the best version of himself while still being "shitty", aka human? Or does he want Guillermo to feel comfortable at his birthday dinner even if Nandor personally thinks the sweaters are ugly?

God. Nandor.

Ahhhh fuck, this all makes me feral. lmao. I am not emotionally prepared for this season.

[cyberrose2001]

RID 15 verse. A shy girl (around Sideswipes age in Earth years) has a MASSIVE crush on Sideswipe since he saved her from a kidnapping attempt. She's a delicate, princess-like (in a good way, she grew up rather sheltered) human whose fashion and aesthetic is pastel/cute core and wants to explore outside of her overprotective elder sister's (BB's future s/o) limits, and empathizes with Sideswipe due to that. Sideswipe really likes her too but doesn't think she'd want someone like him for obvious reasons but doesn't realize that they are both pining for each other(No official confessions yet!)

She's inspired to be more assertive and bolder thanks to him and he tries to slow down (a LITTLE.) for her. They go on joyrides together and she just absolutely has the time of her life every time!

Can the scenario just be them just going on one of said joyrides together in the quarry and they're bonding? (SFW pls!)

TF:RID 15 Sideswipe x human!fem!reader

for some reason I had 'The Night Is Still Young' by Nicki Minaj in my head while I wrote this, and it kinda suits tbh

anyway, sorry for the long wait! my first time writing for Sideswipe too, and I hope I did your request some justice

Warnings: None, sfw, small mention of mild past trauma

Word count: 1,187

"Woohoo!" You giggle in delight, sticking your head out the window as Sideswipe zooms around the quarry, kicking up plumes of dust behind him. The echo of his engine and his chuckles reverbing off the cliffs above you.

It was just the two of you, and you prefer it that way. No overprotective sister, no one nagging in your ear constantly, and most importantly, no limits. The only limit is how hard Sideswipe can put his accelerator on the floor, which you've learned is never enough.

"You better hold onto something, Y/n-" Sideswipes Autobot symbol lights up on his steering wheel before it jolts to the side, and he slams on the brakes.

He drifts near a wall, nearly throwing you onto the other side of his cab if it weren't for the seatbelt that fits too snuggly around your waist. You laugh in delight; a real belly laugh as your hands grip his dashboard as he proceeds to do doughnuts.

"Heheh," Sideswipe's laugh trails off, his engine humming softly, "How's that for a joyride, huh?"

Sideswipe chuckles with you, spinning around and around as much as his momentum can spin him, listening to your giggles and eyeing the toothy grin on your face. He eventually comes to a stop, his spark growing warm at the pure happiness you exude. How happy he makes you.

You giggle breathlessly, a hand running through your wind-swept hair as the adrenaline dissipates from you.

"Yeah, whew! That was so much fun!" You brush your white plaid skirt out, ironing the kinks with your hands once you brush your hair back in place.

"Yeah?" Sideswipe teases, revving his engine a little, "We gotta do this more often, Princess."

A slight blush graces your face at his pet name for you, turning your face away so he doesn't see.

The thing is, you've had a relatively large crush on the red speedster for a long time. The nickname 'Princess' was a name he had jokingly given you when he had unexpectedly saved you from getting snatched up by some random gang in Crown City, and you were definitely not strong enough to fight them off.

Though you were scared for your life at that moment, the least scariest part of that night was when the giant robot swooped in to scare them off. A knight in metallic armour, unironically. Since then, even after he had offered you and your (against her better judgment) older sister a place for protection under secrecy from the rest of the world, the nickname stuck.

Though, you don't know if it's because he likes to tease, or if it's because he likes you. He couldn't possibly want a human that way, could he? A question you have stewed on for a long time and always think about in the most inappropriate moments to be in your thoughts. Like right now.

"Hey, you alright, Princess? Didn't scare you too much, did I?" Sideswipe drags you from your thoughts, and he watches as you blink a few times, returning to the present.

"Yeah, I'm alright." You bite your lip softly, your fingers playing with the cuffs of your oversized pastel pink hoodie, "Just...thinking."

Sideswipe eyes of your fidgeting, a telling sign from you that you're nervous or getting a bit too shy. A quality that he finds exceedingly adorable in you, but he keeps it to himself to avoid crossing your boundaries. He sneakily gazes at you with his rearview mirror, taking in the soft red hue on your cheeks, how your hair falls on your shoulders like a waterfall, and how you bite your lip.

He also can't help but admire you and your cute outfits; he thinks it makes you unique. However, he wishes that you weren't so bound by your older sister, who he thinks can be a pain in the glute servos sometimes. To see you be able to be yourself around him, even just a little bit, makes his spark sing.

He realises he's staring a bit too much, not to mention the silence that falls upon both of you, and he clears his vocaliser.

"About what? If that's okay with you, of course." Sideswipe speaks up, his curiosity getting the better, always wondering what goes on in that little head of yours.

"Just," You blush a little more, either out of shyness or because you can feel his staring, "Just about how we met... do you remember?"

"Are you kidding?" Sideswipe chuckles softly, the warm vibrations sweeping through you, "How could I forget!"

In what seems like two seconds, Sideswipe transforms. Hydraulics and mechanics whirring around you until you sit on his palm, "How I scared off those humans to save you? It was pretty awesome if I say so myself." He poses heroically.

After you had controlled your dizzyness from being thrown around a little, though you're pretty used to it now, you arch a brow at him. Not entirely impressed with his display but secretly amused.

Sideswipe peers an optic down at you before he sheepishly brings you closer to his face, "Sorry, I understand that night wasn't a good memory for you," He brings his other servo to rub the back of his helm.

You nod your head, "It's okay," A hand rubs at your arm, "You're not wrong... but..."

"But what?" Sideswipe tilts his helm at you, an action which you find pretty endearing.

"I... uh... got to meet you, at least." You smile softly at him, your heart beating a little when you feel his thumb press against your back.

The red speedster can't hide the soft hue of blue that forms on his faceplates, not when you're so close to his face.

"Yeah? Well," He smiles at you warmly, bringing a digit to ruffle your hair a little, "Every princess needs her prince, hm?"

"Hey-" You giggle softly, batting away his digit self-consciously, "You'll mess up my hair again."

"Good," Sideswipes spark warms as he watches you giggle, "I like it. It suits you better."

You blush softly at his comment, knowing how much you like maintaining your neat appearance. But if you're completely honest with yourself, you don't mind if Sideswipe messes it up a little.

"C'mon, the night's still young," He sets you down on the ground, letting you get your balance before pulling away, "How 'bouts we walk back to the junkyard?"

"Sideswipe? Not driving? Unheard of." You tease, putting your hands in your hoodie pockets.

"There's no hurry, not while I'm with you at least." Sideswipe chuckles, keeping a watchful eye on you as he walks by your side, "We can take our time, Princess."

Your eyes widen softly at his statement, wondering if there was a double meaning layered over his words. You nod, looking down to the ground as you walk alongside him, smiling as you feel your face heat up at the nickname again, "Yeah... we can take our time."

Sideswipe smiles before leaning down to place a hand on your shoulder, "Also, let's not tell your sister that I let you stick your head out my window, yeah?"

[extrastranszanepropaganda]

OKAY SO!

Diares Rewrite - Divine Relics And Their Warriors

I (added one) AND REDESIGNED THE DIVINE RELICS!!!

This was mainly done for one because I don’t really like the many of the original designs tbh- AND TWO! I wanted to put effort into the symbolism behind the shapes and gems, because symbolism makes me happy, and I like over analyzing things 😌

This one is going to be a long one, so I’m gonna go ahead and put a cut here, lol

FIRST OFF!

Irene (Aphmau)- Purple Diamond

Irene’s relic is based off of the purple diamond! One of the most rare gemstones and a sign for nobility. Irene, being the head of the warriors, slides into this role, as well as the theming of pride and spirituality, for, obvious reasons.

This one didn’t really get a redesign since it’s so iconic

Enki (Travis) - Lapis

Besides wisdom being a key tenant of Enki’s divinity, I thought this worked a lot with Travis and the storyline I’m planning to put him through.

From someone who flirts to hide their their own feelings and thoughts, to someone who is more open and an advisor of sorts. I view Travis as someone who is genuinely very smart and always listening and adapting his actions and words to what people want. The conclusion to his story would be to put a focus on him learning to do what he wants, and to being more genuine and open. To learn that his not just what he can do for others, he’s not just his fathers jailer. That these things are great and all, but that him just being himself is all that really matters

I kept this pretty much the same as the old design again since it looks cool and also I think having the two little gems bracketed leans into the “keeper” title. Especially with the people of their line being all about keeping the demon warlock/evil forces sealed away.

Shad (Aaron) - Ruby

Lets be soooo for real, the story tells itself. From the past hurts, to martyrdom, all the way to being protective of family and having a distorted veiw of one’s self. Shad and Aaron both fit all of these to a T

Annnndddd for the shape I took inspiration from this Slavic symbol!

Like…. Fire…… war……… going through shit….….. also the whole “child” thing!? What started his whole downfall was his daughter being turned into a relic. This relic. To be exact.

I get to be a little devious. As a treat >:3c

Esmund (Garroth) - Pink Garnet

Ok so, the name obviously matches but omg I swear I didn’t realize until much later XDDD

Funny coincidences aside, I thought the themes of loyalty, devotion, consistency, etc. really match him and the stability that he brings to those around him. Not to mention the whole “used to ward off evil“ blah blah blah. AS WELL AS the part where it says that it’s believed through being cut and polished (put through hard times) are when a garnets ability truly shines through. Showing how before he was nothing but a cog in his father’s wheel until he went through adversity and re made himself!

I wanted this to have the general shape shield as well as include the reoccurring shape I put in Garroth’s redesign!

AND I CANT PUT MORE THEN 10 PICTURES PER POST SO ILL REBLOG WITH THE REST RIGHT HERE

[fantasticalleigh]

putting my thoughts down from tags i added to the last post here bc i need them to have their own space but--

i wondered why drew looked so damn tortured on RAW when he beat punk and destroyed the bracelet and after seeing that photo of Drew in near tears the over analyzing really kicked off

so drew Claymore'd Punk off the commentator's table and knelt on the ground after but instead of looking smug or laughing he just looked. idk. broken. and then when he's picking Punk up and they're in the ring and he's stalking around Claymoring him again and again there's that one moment where Drew turns his head away and scrunches up his face like he's in pain.

Why is he reacting like that to his own actions? Normally whenever Drew beats Punk he's a gloating, sadistic, grade-A asshole but on Monday he did look heartbroken. Punk was celebrating being finished with Drew Mcintyre after Bash in Berlin, practically having a party in the ring that he's now able to set his sights on a new opponent and Drew just can't bear that so he came out and did what he did.

Yeah, it's about pride. It's about payback. It's about respect. But (I think) Drew really expects Punk to match the intensity of his obsession with this feud. Every week he's out there demanding Punk's undivided attention:

-luring him out of the ring to chase him around the stadium when Punk is too focused on Seth

-learning his opening routine/mannerisms to the letter to mock him. using all of Punk's history against him like a weapon/insult to provoke an emotional reaction.

-taking his bracelet and kissing it to taunt him every chance he gets

-"look me in the eye when you speak to me" "you complete me/you're my muse/this is divine intervention" "it will never be over" etc. etc. etc.

-risking being fired and even arrested by crashing out on live tv multiple times demanding that Punk come see him/fight him

And Punk responds. He followed Drew to Glasgow just to fuck him out of a win in his own home country (no i will not rephrase that thank you very much). He waited underneath the ring to leap out on an unsuspecting Drew during his segment to whip him with a strap. He ruined Drew's MITB cash-in and beat him with a chair and then the title belt. He falls to Drew's bait again and again but recovers quickly. To Punk it's just another Monday with his unhinged, annoying coworker who he's got another match with. Even if it's a personal rivalry Punk refuses to see it in the same light as Drew does.

TBH I get real Batman & The Joker vibes from them both where Drew (the Joker) wants more and more out of Punk (Batman), and Punk just won't give it. And that breaks Drew's heart because, well, he's a great big dummy deep in love/denial and doesn't realize it yet. Despite his hatred of Punk, Drew feels/senses this is a great /special rivalry and doesn't want to let go.

Deep down he's gotta be thinking of Punk as a worthy adversary even if he'd have to be forced to admit it out loud and through bloodied teeth. Why else keep the feud alive at this point? At the beginning he tried to establish himself as the IT guy. "I'm your leader now, kid." So if he was THAT guy, couldn't he have walked away at any point? Drew could have been the one to drop Punk and focus his sights anywhere else. But now we know he just can't let go of things. He's still fixated on 2020. He's still fixated on his history with Punk. He gave Punk that power (unwillingly) to ruin him, it's his own fault but he's powerless to stop it at this point.

So when Punk's out there talking about setting his sights on someone new, Drew can't bear it, and that pushes him to destroy the bracelet. If I can't have it, you can't either. There's a real poetry in Drew forcing Punk to swallow those beads (and totally not a sexual connotation behind it, no way ;) ;;;;) ). The bracelet was a really interesting motif in the feud, and I loved its symbolism, but I'm glad it's gone. I keep seeing people comment on social media about the feud being stale by now (I disagree) and the expectation is that it will end at Bad Blood in a Hell in a Cell match. I'm sadly leaning this way too, but now that Drew destroyed the bracelet the feud can have a fresh breath of air and go down a new line if they write it right. Selfishly, I don't want it to end any time soon. It's my favorite story line right now in the WWE.

[outmakingmoonshine]

I wrote this reply a few weeks ago about the 773 tattoo on Carmy's arm that really looks like 223. You'll have to read that first because I'm not gonna explain it all again here and you'll need context to understand this post.

SPOILERS below if you haven't watched to the end of S3 yet

Right before this in Marcus's mum's funeral scene he's talking about having someone who really listen to you and pays attention to you and the camera does a not so subtle zoom in on SydCarmy's faces. Then the next scene is this one where Syd says she made the margins wider on the menus because Carmy always writes in them. We already know Carmy pays close attention to Syd and he does really listen to her even though it's like he gets amnesia right after and does the opposite of what she wanted, he does really try to listen and understand her in his own way. This an example of Syd really paying attention to Carmy immediately after being told how significant it is and how good it makes you feel. Carmy looked shocked that she paid attention to him and went out of her way to do something thoughtful for him and said "That's really nice. Thank you." Then Carmy goes on to do a checklist of the things they both need which also showed he knows her too.

Keeping the number meta above in mind, I'm not sure who first mentioned this (pls link the post if anyone knows so I can credit them) but sydcarmy both represent the number 2. In the post above I spoke about when the two 2's (sydcarmy) face each other and finally turn to take notice of each other. I'm pretty certain this scene was a small glipse of what their future together would be like if sydcarmy did face each other without anything or anyone coming between them. They become a cohesive unit, working together as one just like they were in this scene. Sydcarmy are mirrors of each other in many ways, just like the twos are mirroring each other on the clock behind them. I know one is technically a 5 but visually it's a 2 backwards and how else would they symbolize two 2's facing each other on a digital clock? Imo these numbers in this scene represent this moment being a good thing and a glimpse of what they could be, plus the whole scene gave me strong married couple vibes.

In numerology 9 represents completion/the end. The next number, 10, begins the cycle from 1 again or you could say it evolves, moves forward and keeps growing. 9 has other asociations but the core foundational meaning of it is completion. It's telling us in the end they will face each other and balance each other out, mirror each other. "Mirroring is an act of love." If that number sequence in the background of this specific scene isn't positive SydCarmy foreshadowing idk what is. This scene, the context, subtext and symbolism in it alone lets me know the sydcarmy love story and endgame is still very much on track. We're just taking a detour for now, like 99% of will-they-wont-they ships do right before the end of the story.

This shot showed directly after a Carmy/Claire opening scene in 3x05 and Carmy was laying in bed staring at it in some of the darkest blue lighting I think we've seen in the show.

I think this may even be a few shades darker than the sex scene with Claire. Imo it's because Carmy's in his darkest place now, he knows how he feels and who he wants but he can't have it. Carmy metaphorically turned to face Syd in the panic attack scene then fully turned, paid attention and listened to her in the table scene. Now he's somewhat aware of his feelings for her, tbh I think he does know but he's avoiding it because he's in a really dificult situation with Claire and he already let Syd down again after promising to be there for her. He doesn't love Claire romantically but he doesn't wanna hurt her either He's just stuck which is what I think this season was about, Carmy's still mentally and emotionally stuck in the freezer. Carmy said saying sorry to Claire was too hard and I think that's because he knows he has to tell her he doesn't feel the same way and it's gonna hurt her. We keep seeing cute flashbacks with Claire but I don't think it's because he misses her, I think it's because he feels really guilty that he lead her on so much because that's what the scenes were showing. He was acting all loved up with her and it's interesting that we the audience/Carmy never saw that last season and we're only seeing now it in hindsight. Remember the show is telling us the story through Carmy's eyes.

I said in the post above I initially thought the number 3 represented Claire and/or Marcus, but in 2x08 Carmy (2) asked Richie (3) to be the "go-between" and give Syd (2) an I love you note, literally putting the three in the middle of the two 2's so it made sense it probably represented him at the time.

And maybe it does, idk, he's been getting between them since S1 in one way or another, directly or indirectly. But it more likely represents anyone that comes between them. The third wheel so to speak.

Notice how the 2's aren't facing each other here in 2x08 because this was before Carmy faced what Syd means to him in 2x09.

And you may be wondering if the mirroring numbers represent how sydcarmy end up why isn't Carmy's tattoo 753? Well 753 isn't the chicago area code so it would raise questions why Carmy had a random tattoo of 753 so I think it was a choice to keep the symbolism but keep it subtle.

I didn't expect s3 to feel this bad (I should've tbh, this show always makes you feel the most) but I didn't expect it to go well for sydcarmy. That's why I posted this post the day before the episodes aired reminding everyone what the show told us to expect. They did warn us this wasn't gonna be a mushy gooey love story. It's not gonna be cute and sweet, it's gonna be ballbreaker and that's what Carmy's doing to Syd. He's doing to her what the NY Chef did to him. He's already making her sick, making her have panic attacks and he knows he's a "bad boss". He glanced her way when they were talking about it at the table in 3x10. When I saw Carmy confront NY Chef, for a moment I thought they were gonna have Carmy say the same to Syd one day in the future (this is how bad the whole situation felt while watching the show, it was truly horrible to watch) but I really don't think so. Carmy doesn't want to be anything like that arrogant guy so I can only imagine he'd be the complete opposite with Syd (someone he genuinely cares about) when he finally pulls his head out of his ass, metaphorically gets out of the freezer and faces the situation he's in like Cicero told him you have to run straight into it, you can't avoid it.

Even though this season was very hard to watch I think the same amount of subtext, symbolism and metaphors that pointed to sydcarmy in the last seasons is still all there. It's just more difficult to see, especially after 1 watch because there were barely any scenes that seem good for them on a surface level, they all went to Carmy/Claire. But underneath the surface a lot of the scenes imply good things are still to come for sydcarmy imo.

[lyrakanefanatic]

Thoughts that I wanted to share about the brothers Hawthorne/ the grandest game bc I don’t wanna make a million posts about each one 💀

1: Phone girls dad literally shot himself ON. HER. BIRTHDAY. 😭😭

2: Skye Hawthorne MIGHT be in the grandest game, because when Avery got bombed and Ricky and skye got arrested for it, they found out that it actually wasn’t them which means they prob got out of jail (maybe not Ricky but probably skye) and she might be controlling one of the players

3: WE’LL PROBABLY GET TO SEE A SUNSHINE X GRUMPY TROPE!! (Mathias and Gigi)

4: we’ll see which 7 contestants avery will pick for the game!! (While I was writing that instead of contestants I accidentally put tributes 💀)

5: we might learn more about Toby’s backstory (or just the Hawthorne backstories in general, like Zara’s, nans or Alice’s)

6: speaking of Alice, SOMEHOW THAT OLD GRANDMAS GOING TO BE ALIVE

7: this isn’t really a prediction but more just like a possible hint for the grandest game, but when grayson tells his brothers about the riddle “what begins a bet? Not that”, Jameson says this

He says “what’s the opposite of a handshake?” And I found a picture online that shows multiple different options of what could be the opposite of a handshake

Basically most of the words on there kind of show “misinterpretation” or just different words for some sort of mistake, so would that mean that the “beef” (im just gonna call it that bc I don’t rlly know what went down) between tobias and thomas thomas was maybe accidental?? Or maybe they got into a disagreement that ended in thomas ending his life? All the book really shows is that one paragraph (that I highlighted in green) that talks about what Jameson thought of the riddle, and then Jameson was talking to Avery about the game (probs bc jlb didn’t wanna drop too many hints lmao) And then if you add it in with the “abet” theory ⬇️

It said that one of the opposites of a handshake were “refusal” and “disagreement”, so what if tobias had wanted thomas to aid one of his crimes and thomas refused, and maybe tobias gave him an ultimatum which is why he shot himself?? It’s so confusing bc what would tobias even do that was so horrible that thomas had to shoot himself, I really don’t know. but if anyone has some theory’s on this pls lmk! 🫶

8: holy guacamole 7 was a long one, but anyway i feel like there are definitely more hints on the grandest game in the brothers Hawthorne then there were in the final gambit, even though in (i think tig is the one that clue was from?) the inheritance games “special” edition bc idk what their called it said “hints in the final gambit”. (although one loose end from tig was David Golding, and @riddles-n-games had a good theory about that) But i read the final gambit entirely and didn’t find a single clue other than David, so that’s kinda weird (unless somebody else found something else they found interesting in that book?)

9: Eve might also be behind one of the players, or just trying to get involved with the game so she could get the cash prize or whatever else it is that that psycho needs 🙄

10: we’ll (most likely, bc I’m 99.9% sure that she’ll be in tgg) see what phone girl looks like and see which one of us were right 😜

11: kinda random but i will bet a whole 5 dollars that phone girls name is either gonna be flower related, or just straight up be lily. Or maybe both, but just think of how ironic that would be (there are calla lilys all over the cover of tgg… 🤷‍♀️)

12: LIBBY NASH WEDDING!!! 🤭🤭🤭💗

13: so off topic but WHERE DO GRAYSON AND JAMESON GET THEIR MONEY FROM??? like I’m sure jameson probably gets some cash from his billionaire girlfriend, but what about grayson?? he says in tbh that he’s “buried in work” but what kind of work does he do?? and who does he work for?? 🤨

14: Okay this is gonna be the last one bc i need to shut up, but does anybody have an idea on what some things in the grandest game cover might symbolize? we know about the lilys and the opal rings, but other than that i CANT seem to figure out anything else on there 😭😭

and okay that’s all thank you for coming to my ted talk 🫶😊🙌

[kadextra]

Okay this is gonna be a lot of thoughts but this is how I’m currently understanding what’s happening in the lore of q!Bad

That very first stream in the desert? q!Bad was dying, the nuke damaged him so severely man was walking towards the light. he was completely focused on that, even drank the poisoned water (theorized to be river lethe water that erases memories) and since he couldn’t remember anything, just followed his instincts that told him to walk. BUT he turned back, because he ended up remembering his kids. his friends. he needs to stay alive for them.

“It’s not time yet. Not yet.”

I think him turning back interrupted the death process- which is why we’re having all these consequences now. in the library-memory analogy he talked about? maybe his memory index wasn’t fully wiped, and by turning back it’s almost like it got shattered into pieces too? that could be what all the q!Bads running around in the desert are

“We don’t know how we got here, but we’re here!”

The memory problems, the soul vulture wounds, the horrible nuclear wound, he is bearing with all this suffering because no… can’t die yet. I’ll deal with this horrible radiation damage and half-life until it eventually decays. Sure, I’ll burn it on magma to hopefully accelerate it, make it go away faster. What? I’m not coughing, you’re imagining things…

And in his mind q!Bad is desperately holding onto the tethers that keep him coherent (the eggs, the flowers) likely without even realizing it. because as soon as they disappear from sight his mind blinks out like a light. the worst part about this though, is that he doesn’t even know it’s happening. he knows about the radiation wound yes, but has zero memory of his own memory loss. :(

He is losing control, mind a chaotic mess, and maybe that chaos is what’s symbolized by the giant tornado which so carelessly flung him around.

Tbh q!Bad is probably near-death every night which is why he keeps ending up back in the mind desert (the realm of sleep and death touch after all). To fully recover from all this damage he would probably need to continue walking, then would eventually end up back on track with following the light and finishing the process of dying:

“Maybe you guys are right, maybe we just need to pick a direction- just pick a direction and walk. maybe if we just walk far enough, we'll find our way out... (stares at cornflower symbolizing Pomme) but I don't know. It just feels... like I'm leaving something behind."

bro is never going to do that lmao. if it’s up to him, he will never be able to leave his kids, his family, and die. he is fighting to stay alive in his broken body no matter how much it hurts

“Worst case, die and reset. If you don’t want to… then bear with it.”

[zynart]

the picture of aubrey dorian grayham

i havent seen anyone else say it yet, but i've often felt like drake had the vibe of a real-life dorian gray, even for years before this and even aside from all the allegations. and if today felt like a slashed painting, let's cover what i mean

it's about an almost 40 year old whose entire online presence for years has been culture curation and memes and celebrity shit and partying and womanizing and more partying on instagram and plastic surgery and trendsetting trend following and making music to make tiktok money and memeing with celebrities for instagram

a slightly dorky looking guy who seemed like a somewhat self-aware and kinda soulful enough dude in his early 20s, who got famous making music about love and emotions or heartbreak or whatever that even got him the "sensitive rapper" moniker (whether the image was real or fake all along, what i mean in how he came across in public) who has now spent a decade as this giant star where i cant remember the last time i've seen him do anything that looked like it showed an actual emotion beyond insecurity and pettiness and self-aggrandizement in all that time, especially about love

guy made songs like marvin's room but when's the last time he seems to have had any actual emotions about any women besides just chasing an endless list of women as status symbols and feeling wronged or slighted or threatened by women over petty shit. guy got famous off a song like best i ever had, made "sweatpants, hair tied, chilling with no make-up / that's when you're the prettiest" into a catchphrase people referenced for years. i dont know what his true self was but just like in the story, we're not arguing about whether dorian was rotten from the start, just talking about how it seems

haven't seen him show genuine emotion in years aside from trolling. flaunting wealth, trying to take taken women getting off on the concept of dominance play over other men. it's like someone who cared so much about looking hard and chasing pleasures that, because they thought real love and heartbreak looked weak, decided it was better to lose the capability at all

"enthralled by the hedonistic worldview that sensual fulfillment is the only thing worth pursuing in life... dorian expresses the desire to sell his soul. the wish is granted, and dorian pursues a libertine life of varied amoral experiences while staying young..."

someone whose entire life is vacationing with drinks beautiful settings or clubs or mansions or posing with celebrity women or trolling for memes, shown no actual emotions except pettiness and resentment in years. plastic surgery to look fitter and younger. life that's not lived as much as meticulously crafted and curated for instagram

circling back and seeing its a reverse dorian gray situation. one might think that instagram is the real-life painting, but the drake that we see and know is the drake on instagram, the carefully curated hedonistic party animal billionaire with a parade of celebrity friends and women, ab etchings and pout and photo filters and vacation settings for a look curated to be unchanging, constant, the biggest star on the planet. the drake we dont see, the drake in the attic, is the real drake. the person behind the curation

tbh maybe it's not that deep, it's just. a certain dorian gray feeling is something i've always gotten. this drake is something that in theory can't last, you would've expected any given billionaire playboy to have wound down and found love and settled by this age, there's only so long you can stave off time until you're actually old without a family around you, unless you're dorian gray and you can just keep going. but at some point someone's still stabbing that painting

[minnieposting]

i want to talk about robins trailer again!

following up from this post + a cool thread i saw earlier compiling lots of details i didn't notice in the trailer! (and the morse code post)

mostly really interested in the fact that this whole thing is filmed and directed by sunday

(sc from twt thread)

i said earlier that robin must feel like she doesn't want to let down both sunday and the family, both as his sister and the "pride of the family". but this clearly shows that he's the one pulling the strings, or at least one of them.

(as i type this out, i realize the usage of "pulling the strings" could relate back to the imagery of puppets we've been seeing. they are present in robin's trailer and also seen in the 2.2 penacony trailer)

(and of course, another puppet on strings...)

not sure where i'm going with this because tbh i got side tracked because i had the realization while writing. just some cool consistent puppet imagery, obviously symbolic, just don't feel like thinking about this rn lol

ANYWAY, my original train of thought was going towards sunday being a huge pressure on her, whether intentionally or not, he's clearly got his own shit going on... but i also feel like this gives new meaning to something else i pointed out a bit ago (post)

sunday is always right behind robin! she's always in the spotlight while he looms in the shadows. another thing tho, the same person who posted that twt thread i linked to pointed out that our bird friend is seen in the corner watching robin perform (x)

in the upper right corner!

(though, ive seen speculation that the bird is not sunday's but the dreammaster's! either way, sunday is still the most involved with her in the context of my post...)

now, going back to what i really want to talk about in the first place - director sunday. i do think this is more symbolic than anything, and coming from robin's perspective as this is her trailer.

sunday is a perfectionist obsesed with control and robin's public image may not be spared from that. she may feel that sunday is essentially breathing down her neck, whether or not sunday is aware he's making her feel like this. i've always thought that sunday's perfectionism and his obsessiveness have bled into his love for his sister and their relationship as a whole. again, she clearly does not want to let him down specifically, especially when they're supposedly working towards a childhood dream.

it's just! this whole thing about freedom, or the lack of it. robin is a caged bird and that's become explicit in her trailer. who knows wtf sunday's deal is, but he's also clearly under SO much pressure, he's the head of the oak family and ALSO needs to be nothing less than perfect. dude had a whole speech about it. i also imagine they both don't talk about any negative feelings related to this, maybe even wanting to keep up appearances around each other too.

i feel like i dont have anything else to say. i just mainly wanted to talk about some observations and stuff. i am very much looking forward to 2.2 coming out later, im SO excited to dig into sunday because he is the most intriguing and mysterious to me. their relationship is just so so so interesting, im so excited to see it in all of its glory later.

and mandatory note bc i am an anxious person, i do a lot of talking out of my ass and this is just exactly that.

(uh i scrolled up to read this post over and saw i linked back to a morse code post and didn't talk about that at all. well there's SOS morse code in robins trailer! that's fucked up! what else can i say)

[welcome-to-the-end-of-eras]

Ranking the pulleyverse characters based on how much I like their names

Obviously this list is subjective but like. We all know that some of these are objectively true.

1.) Keita Mori: I personally think this is a top tier name. It flows well together, it fits his personality, there’s a lot of cool symbolism behind/because of it, it’s really a fantastic name for a character. No notes, 10/10.

2.) Raphael: it’s a really cool name, and I think it’s fun that he doesn’t have a set last name; it’s adds a bit of mystery to things. That and calling him Raphael TheBedlamStacks is funny as shit to me. Is it a little dramatic??? Yes, but so is he so it works. 9.5/10.

3.) Valery Kolkhanov: again, I think this name is super fun, and super creative, and it really does fit his personality well. I’m only putting it lower than Raphael because I thought his name was Valerie (English pronunciation) and I got my hopes up for the first proper female pulleyverse mc, but if that weren’t the case his name and Raphael’s would be equal. 9/10.

4.) Joe Tournier: Comparatively a pretty average name, but I have to admit the French last name sounds kinda pretty. If his name had stayed Jem Castlereigh or whatever the fuck, it would be significantly lower on this list. 8/10

5.) Konstantin Shenkov: I like this slightly less than Valery’s name because it’s a little bit clunky comparatively, but it’s definitely not a bad name. Don’t like that Konstantin is spelled like that tho, it looks a bit odd. 7/10.

6.) Aubrey/River Gale: there’s something off about these names that I really can’t put my finger on, but it’s just. Slightly off-putting to me. They’re such an ethereal person that I feel like their name should be a little. More, yknow??? If they were River Sterling that would be a different story, I like that name a lot, but River Gale sounds anticlimactic almost. 5/10.

7.) Thaniel Steepleton: this kills me. This kills me so bad. It’s no secret that he’s my favourite, my babiest of girls, but god almighty pick a different fucking nickname. It sounds so stupid. Nathaniel isn’t a bad name, it’s a bit proper but it’s definitely not a bad name, so why on god’s green earth would you remove the easiest two letters to pronounce and call that a nickname, it’s fucking stupid. And it sounds so British, it’s atrocious. 3/10. And that is ONLY because of how much I love him.

8.) January Sterling: objectively speaking, the reason behind his name is funny as fuck, but literally any other normal person would just. Go and change his name. Or let him go by his middle name. Why he decided to stick with January is beyond me. 1/10.

9.) Merrick Tremayne: it’s so British. Like. Annoyingly British. Love him to death but his name sucks so bad, and it just puts me in mind of the evil stepmother from Cinderella. RIP to the real Merrick Tremayne, you never had to get made fun of in school for how bad your name is. 0/10

10.) Missouri Kite: I cannot STAND this name istg. “Oh it’s translated-” HOW DOES A SPANISH NAME TRANSLATE INTO A WORD IN TWO SEPARATE LANGUAGES??? MISSOURI COMES FROM A NATIVE AMERICAN DIALECT IN THE MIDWEST REGION OF AMERICA, AND KITE IS A RANDOM ASS BRITISH WORD FOR A PIECE OF FLYING CLOTH, HOW THE FUCK DO THOSE COMBINE TO MAKE A NAME??? IT’S SO STUPID. -5/10.

Edit: I didn’t include Flint Kang and that was an oversight on my part, but tbh I don’t have much of an opinion. I’m going to say he’s a step below Shenkov, his name is also a little clunky but also a little nasally so it’s not as nice. 5.5/10.

[flowerslut]

I don't know about you but I've always hated the trope of vampires being addicted to blood like it was drugs. That's like saying that a human can be addicted to regular water if they drink too much so they have to filter it or something to change it. I don't know, I just don't understand why they would be 'addicted' to the very thing they need to survive? It makes me think of the quote from Mad Max; Fury Road "Do not, my friends, become addicted to water. It will take hold of you, and you will resent its absence!" In saying that, I do find it very funny that Jasper can be addicted to certain emotions, like how he was following Bella around the house and reluctantly leaving rooms she was in when she came to visit because he was getting 'high' off her good mood and Edward was so bemused to see him in that state because he's typically sounded by moody bitches who always argue and complain so he's not used to someone (other than Alice but I think he's used to her now, whereas Bella would be a bit like a slap in the face I think) being so genuinely happy that he follows her around like pepe lepew and skunk stink. I read a fic once about Jasper/Alice and Emmett/Rosalie going to college and meeting there and joining frats and they were around a bunch of drunk college kids and Jasper was ALSO starting to act a little drunk and loose and silly because SO MANY DRUNK KIDS all in the same space together was starting to affect him too. I don't know. I've just been thinking about it

I've never really thought twice about the whole "blood thirst as an allegory for addiction/human vices" because that's always been tied together really well with most vampire stories. I sort of expect that measure of symbolism from vampire media now, and tbh you'd really have to do some heavy, intense worldbuilding to make a vampire universe where bloodlust isn't akin to sex or addiction or some sort of taboo in order to make it still have the correct ~vibes~ (not that it's impossible, but I think the struggle to having to resist, or not resist, is honestly part of the lure for some people.)

and I know what you're trying to do with the "humans can't be addicted to water" thing but if water could only be obtained through killing other people (which, ahem, *gestures to history books*) then people sure would be snapping necks to get it, aaand that makes for an interesting story! I think it (obsession with blood being used as an allegory for drug addiction) can lead to some really interesting story dynamics and plot conflict!!

"I just don't understand why they would be 'addicted' to the very thing they need to survive?" because it's interesting! what do you do when you have to kill to survive, even if it goes against everything you've ever been taught? i love it. 10/10. bring on the pain game. I want to see the hoops people will jump through to moralize their choices!!!! its fun dude!!!!! 🤩

it is cute that jasper's drawn to happy emotions but the way that stephenie implements it makes me roll my eyes half of the time. especially when edward is like "wow bella, jasper loves being around because your emotions are soooo nice and pure and good and addicting because our love is so #Strong! 😌" like, yawwwwn. talk about an informed trait. sorry steph I will never care about edbella 😔 and also, like, reading twilight from bella's pov we... really don't get the proof of her being such a happy person. homegirl has self-esteem issues out the ass so color me skeptical that her emotions were really that alluring 🙄

but it does lead to fun opportunities for headcanons whenever people ask "so...alice just walked up to jasper and he just? went with it?" because if all it takes is a bitch with a good mood to have this war criminal trailing behind them then jasper never stood a chance at being an independent entity. he would've been simping for the first person who didn't feel revulsion toward him. I guess we should be happy it was alice that scooped him up and not someone less cool and hot and fun

but yes! i love the opportunity for jasper's gift to really mess with him and its SO fun to play around with it in fic!!!! breaking dawn doesn't have a lot that I love but if does have some fun "jasper having to feel some nonsense" moments

[thesherrinfordfacility]

clearing out the drafts of Random Things I've Noticed if you can't tell but here, have another one - this building on the end of aziraphale's row of shops, on the other side of the record shop:

now im fairly certain about two things. first, it's called 'Alf Laylah wa-Laylah' - translated to english from arabic as One Thousand and One Nights. i can't quite tell at this quality if the writing below it is hebrew or yiddish, nor if it's a translation of the text above it (although, as best as i can tell? it isn't? but not sure)

im also not entirely sure on the relevance of the reference - if there is any to be had - to the story compilation that is One Thousand and One Nights, to tell the truth. the immediate thought that springs to mind is how scheherazade tells the king countless folk tales and stories over 1001 nights in order to keep him in suspense of hearing how the stories end - so he essentially stops killing women as revenge for the infidelity of his wife (it's a whole thing), whom he eventually pardons/spares from execution.

all the tales - as well as returns to the 'present' - include debate on philosophies and ethics, and explore various themes and topics, but regardless... my thoughts are somewhat jumping between this, the questions around the reliability of events as presented in s2, the flashbacks and the Lessons, etc. maybe that's not the link to make here, but it's all im coming up with so far.

but back to the building, and the second thing: think that the stars on the bottom half of the building, in the specific configuration they're shown, are the kaheksakand (estonian) / auseklis (latvian) - an eight-pointed star representing fertility and life, the triumph of light over darkness, as well as used as a protection symbol against evil (aptly placed outside the door).

there's a lot to go into re: the symbology behind '8', including its relationship to the concept of balance and harmony, especially in nature. the eight-pointed star in general, not just in the above exact shape, has dozens of cultural, religious, and mythological links (tbh it's probably featured in some capacity in nearly every culture), but i think particularly apt is how it links to venus aka. the morning star.

in the interest of keeping this brief (im sure cleverer people may wish to clarify/develop this more!!!), and keeping on track with where its place may sit in the show, i think it's first of all potentially of interest how this building is lit, given the above. we see the shot of the bentley arriving to whickber street in ep1 at night, and this particular shop (?) front is the most brightly lit... might mean nothing, might mean something:

but when the demons descend in ep5, a good portion of them appear out of the mist from that direction; a green mist (green shop?), reflecting the hell vibes we saw in ep1 etc. that being said, when crowley starts sensing Trouble Is Afoot earlier on, he's looking in all directions and certainly we see some demons behind him (in the direction of the dirty donkey) when he confronts this particular little gang of them, so unless some demons started arriving ahead of schedule, they may not have all come through this building:

but. we know from eric that the lift is broken, and the only other routes are the small lift, one at a time, or the stairs. shax obviously arrives in style, but the other demons? taken the stairs. what if this front is that exit onto earth? but just the back stairwell?

there's so many potentially loose threads to weave in here, and im sure i'll come back to this at some point, but felt it was an interesting design choice nonetheless, even if it ultimately means naff all✨

[craycray-wolf]

*I*

Would like to make fanfiction of Minecraft Story Mode 😎

I plan on writing my own ideas as well as my version of events/own twist on the game's story itself! By this I mean the choices I like to make and adding some of my own events as well. I know these are common I just think I personally have something to offer! Plus the more preservation of the game's overall story we have the better ^_^ I love these games so much and I don't ever want them to die!

Then of course I have my own original stories for MCSM, it's just that my version of the games' stories provide context.

(Also it's probably going to be rated teen/PG13 and possibly even mature for some chapters, though for the latter I'm going to try to make them not necessary for the story when I can! I know the game itself is E10+ and meant for a general audience but I'm too much of a freak tbh. I like making intense content)

I plan on making 3 different universes:

Red Suspenders Jesse (and Jesskas) <= currently working on this one

Red hairclip Jesse (and Jesstra)

Red pants/peach sus Jesse (Jerkesse. No hate to any Jesse variants- I love them all!)

I also have a few short stories about red sus already written that I plan to integrate into the greater narrative once it's done. I have them already published on Wattpad and plan to publish them on AO3 and Fanfiction too.

Now this is gonna take a while to write so uh- feel free to ask any questions! I'm also going to share some tidbits about each universe real quick below.

SPOILER WARNINGS FOR BOTH SEASONS JUST IN CASE 🚨🚨🚨

You have been warned! I highly recommend experiencing the game for yourself if possible or watching a playthrough!

Okay let's experience a sampling of my chaotic brainrot!

Red sus: This Jesse is the most cinnamon roll of the 3 Jesses, but he's still savage as that is a classic Jesse trait. He's also the most honest of the 3, his mindset here is probably best encapsulated by the phrase "honesty is the best policy." He tends to relate more to Olivia than Axel, but he deeply loves them both. He takes Hadrian's deal without hesitation.

Jesse particularly likes the Ender Defender armor and uses it during S1. He also thought the best way to keep Magnus' armor would be to care for it and it not be damaged. He decides to branch out in S2 and wear the Shield of Infinity armor, then Please Don't Hit Me. He takes Romeo back with them home with no hesitation, even if he's p.o.'ed at the man. He told Petra he'd be right beside her as she found herself at the cabin, and follows through on his promise once Beacontown is rebuilt and stable enough (and he works on some personal business). He turns down Stella's offer as he thinks Lluna and her are meant to be.

During their travels, Jesse realizes how much he missed animal companionship due to Lluna. He keeps an eye out for his new companion, and comes across a bat in a cherry grove. The Order had troubles with bats previously whereas now they're turning over a new leaf. This new friend symbolizes new beginnings. Because of this and the fact that she was found in a cherry blossom biome, Jesse names the bat "Bloom." I love Bloom so much y'all. I hope you will too 😊

Red hairclip: She's less optimistic than red sus Jesse, but still a fair amount so. This Jesse still appreciates truthfulness but it's not a core feature she has or one she seeks like red sus Jess. She's less trusting than red sus Jesse so she doesn't take Hadrian's deal (though she's willing to sacrifice herself for her loved ones no question).

She thinks the best way to keep the armor is to wear it, killing the Witherstorm in honor of Ellegaard. Briefly before their Portal adventures though she tries wearing the Dragonsbane armor and falls in love. In S2 she wears Star Shield and Golden Apple.

Since Jesse chose to leave Nurm behind she has a stronger bond with Lluna, and takes Stella up on her offer to keep the fashionable llama. She is torn between adventuring with Petra and staying to keep leading her beloved town. She ultimately stays in Beacontown, at least for quite a while. That is until Jesse realizes how much she loves Petra and goes out to search for her.

Red pants/peach sus: And then there's THIS asshole. Tbh he's not as developed as the other two yet, but he's not the funnest guy to be around. He still cares on some level for his friends, but he sees them more as a means to an end. He's incredibly selfish and egotistical, soaking up all the glory from his "heroism". All of his actions are motivated by things that'd benefit him. Therefore he sure as heck doesn't take Hadrian's deal.

Not sure whether he takes Magnus' or Ellegaard's armor. S2 he wears Tim's armor because you know. Fancy and diamonds and stuff. He gets no 2nd animal sidekick, he didn't treat the first one right!

Also here, a link to my fanart of the New Order (S1 style) thx: https://www.tumblr.com/craycray-wolf/736076088473731072/these-dorks-in-my-artstyle-i-love-them-too-much?source=share

Thanks for reading Fam! It's been lit.