#the lotus: a hope or wish perhaps

[extraordinarilyextreme]

大理寺少卿游 / White Cat Legend (2024) eps. 11-12

[mxtxfanatic]

Fandom Gripe #22: I wish the novel fandom would stop ascribing to Jiang Cheng things that he did not do (at least not alone) to make his character seem like some outstanding model citizen who pulled himself up by his bootstraps instead of the rotten product of wealth and nepotism that he is.

No, Jiang Cheng did not rebuild Lotus Pier on his own. In fact, Lotus Pier didn't need to be rebuilt at all because it was never destroyed. Wen Chao was using it as his supervision office, which is why Wang Lingjiao showed up in the first place:

Wang LingJiao spoke in a tender voice, “Young Master Wen, congratulations for moving into Lotus Pier.” Wen Chao, “What Lotus Pier? Change the name. Bring down any door carved with the nine-petaled lotus crest and replace them with those with the QishanWen Sect’s sun crest! JiaoJiao, come dance for me your best song!”

—Chapt. 59: Poisons, exr

If anything, any "rebuilding" that was done happened after Wei Wuxian defected, as Jiang Cheng remade Lotus Pier to be more extravagant than it originally was:

It was perhaps because too many places had been renewed. The training field was two times larger. Each new building seemed to be taller than the previous, adorned with curving roof decor. It seemed grander than before and had more splendor. But, compared to the Lotus Pier of his memories, it had changed too much. Wei WuXian felt a sense of loss from deep within. He didn’t know whether the old buildings from the past were blocked behind these impressive new buildings or if they were torn down already.

—Chapt. 85: Loyalty, exr

No, Jiang Cheng did not recruit new disciples on his own. He was recruiting on his own during the war for the 3 months that Wei Wuxian had been trapped in the Burial Mounds, as per Wang Lingjiao's musings:

...leaving only Jiang Cheng, who was younger than even Lan XiChen and was still a child born yesterday, who had nobody in his hands but still dared call himself sect leader, holding up the banner of rebellion as he recruited new disciples.

—Chapt. 60: Poisons, exr

But after Wei Wuxian returned, Wei Wuxian had a large hand in disciple recruitment, specifically because of the interest his ghost path garnered amongst cultivators at banquets where they were recruiting, such as the Phoenix Mountain Hunt:

One of the sect leaders spoke in a sour tone, “This time, Lotus Pier is really the center of the show. Almost all of the spirits and corpses were summoned to the YunmengJiang Sect’s grounds. There’d definitely be a number of cultivators interested in them.” ... Someone sneered, “Huh? Interested in them? I don’t think so. To put it simply, they’re interested in Wei WuXian, aren’t they? Didn’t the YunmengJiang Sect grow in fame during the Sunshot Campaign only because of Wei WuXian?”

—Chapt. 70: Departure, exr

Despite the above quote being gossip from jealous cultivators, we know this to be true because after Wei Wuxian defects, cultivators begin to flock to the Burial Mounds to ask to be his disciples, still:

After he found himself in the limelight during a few night-hunts, there really were quite a few people who came for him, hoping that they could be accepted by the ‘patriarch’ and become one of his disciples. The mountains that used to be so deserted suddenly became crowded. None of the fierce corpses Wei WuXian set up on patrol down the mountain would attack on their own. At most, they’d send the person flying and roar their throats out. Nobody got hurt, and so more and more people gathered down Burial Mound.

—Chapt. 75: Distance, exr

No, Jiang Cheng did not raise Jin Ling on his own. First off, Jin Ling is the heir to the Jin Clan, so him being raised wholly by Jiang Cheng would make absolutely no sense. Which is why nowhere does the novel say this happens; Jin Ling spends his time split between Lanling and Lotus Pier:

When Jin Ling was young, he was brought up by two sects. He lived at the LanlingJin Sect’s Jinlin Tower half the time, and the YunmengJiang Sect’s Lotus Pier the other half, so he should be carrying belongings from both sects.

—Chapt. 38: Grasses, exr

(However—and this is just my conjecture—I doubt the overtly homophobic and sexist Jiang Cheng would personally go about changing the diapers of a child who only knew him to be merciless and cold:

From the beginning of his memory until now, Jin Ling had never seen such a look on Jiang Cheng’s face before. This uncle of his who led the prominent YunmengJiang Sect ever since a young age had always been cold and dark. When he spoke, he was willing to neither show mercy nor do good.

—Chapt. 23: Malice, exr

Rich people have servants for a reason.)

No, Jiang Cheng does not spend his time helping the people of Yunmeng. He really does spend a good deal of his time fobbing off his duty to the people (not unusual for a large sect) in favor of hunting down and torturing people (very unusual, the reason why his citizens prefer to pray to gods) who either had the surname Wen or that he suspected of either being possessed by Wei Wuxian because they remind him of the latter, which extends to people who use his inventions:

Jiang Cheng spoke grimly, “Break his legs? Haven’t I told you? If you see this sort of evil and crooked practice, kill the cultivator and feed him to your dogs!”

—Chapt. 7: Arrogance, exr

Zidian definitely wouldn’t deceive [Jiang Cheng] or make a mistake, so he quickly calmed himself and thought, this doesn’t mean anything. I should first find an excuse to take him back and use every possible method to get information out of him. It’s impossible for him to not confess anything or give himself away. I’ve done things like this in the past anyways. After thinking it through, he made a gesture. The disciples understood his intention and came over.

—Chapt. 10: Arrogance, exr

The owner, “Young Masters, you’re not from Yunping City so you don’t know. The Jiang Sect is responsible for all of us along the Yunmeng area. The Sect Leader’s got quite a bad temper. It’s almost frightening. His subordinate’s said so a long time ago. Only one sect is in charge of such a large area. Each day, there are almost a hundred cases of small ghosts or other creatures pulling pranks on the living and all that. If every single small thing had to be dealt with immediately, would there be enough time and energy? Those that don’t kill anyone aren’t malign spirits, and we’re not supposed to disturb them with trivial matters that aren’t malign spirits.” She complained, “What is this supposed to mean? Wouldn’t it be too late if we waited until somebody’s died to find them?!” ... The owner continued, “On top of that, Lotus Pier is truly a scary place. How would anyone dare go there again?” Wei WuXian moved his gaze from Lan WangJi’s calm face with a short pause of surprise, “Lotus Pier is scary? How could Lotus Pier be scary? You’ve been there?” The owner, “I haven’t been there myself, but I know someone who went because his house was being badly haunted. But it was all bad luck. That Sect Leader Jiang was cracking a glowing whip right on the training field. The victim’s flesh and blood flew as high as his screams! A servant secretly informed him that the sect leader caught the wrong person again, that he hadn’t been in a great mood, and that he definitely shouldn’t be irritated in any way. He was so scared that he dropped off the gifts he brought and fled at once. He never dared visit again.” Wei WuXian had long since heard of how Jiang Cheng had been searching for cultivators of the ghost path who seemed like they seized another’s body, taking all of them into Lotus Pier to be tortured and questioned. The owner’s friend probably just happened to have ran into him when he was letting off steam. It wasn’t hard to imagine how hideous Jiang Cheng would’ve looked, so no wonder a normal person would make a run for it. ... The owner, “No, no. It was his misfortune. The person’s surname was Wen, and that Sect Leader Jiang’s archenemy happened to have the surname of Wen as well. He’s hating on everyone in this world whose surname is Wen. Whenever he sees one, he’d grind his teeth in hatred, wanting to skin them alive. How could he give a single friendly look to...”

—Chapt. 92: Longing, exr

The time he isn't spending hunting down people to torture, he uses to trail after Jin Ling on nighthunts to make sure nothing happens to him.

Wei WuXian, “Huh? Jiang Cheng? How did you run into him while night-hunting?” Lan SiZhui, “We invited Young Master Jin to join our night- hunt last time, so...” Wei WuXian immediately understood. One could even guess that while Lan SiZhui led the group in the night-hunt, Wen Ning naturally wouldn’t be idle either. He must’ve followed them in the dark to protect them, so that he could provide assistance when they encounter danger during the night-hunt. Jiang Cheng must’ve been sneaking behind Jin Ling as well, scared something would happen to him again.

—Chapt. 116: Banquet Extra, exr

Any other "single jiujiu!jc who don't need no man!" fanon I'm missing?

[thesilversun]

Dihua exchange fic: Fragments of our Past

Writen for @flashbulb-memory as part of the the Dihua exchange.

Bulb, I hope this was the kind of thing that you wanted.

Title: Fragments of our Past

Pairing: Di Feisheng/Li Lianhua

Rating: Mature (brief nsfw in Di Feisheng's memory fragments)

Warnings: No AO3 archive warning apply

Word count: 5984

Additional tags on AO3: Temporary Amnesia, Headaches & Migraines, Hurt/Comfort, Sharing a Bed, regaining lost memories, previous relationship together, working on getting back together.

Summary:

After returning to the Lotus Tower following the events at Mountains Red, Di Feisheng finds himself feeling more and more unsettled by what happened there. The women held there, how they were people who wouldn’t be missed. The cruel master with guards controlled and beholden to him even if they did not wish to do his bidding. Even Murong Yao, how he’d come to take vengeance, how he’d wanted it to be over, rather than to take power and continue the cycle of oppression. They all play into memories that he no longer has access to, yet still manage set his nerves on edge.

Unable to rest, a late night practice with his sword brings with it a brief flash of the past - a shared, intimate past with Li Lianhua.

Read here or on AO3

They leave Mountains Red, the women freed and able to return to their homes if that is their wish, while they return to the Lotus Tower.

For all it is over and done with, Di Feisheng finds himself feeling more and more unsettled by what happened there. The women’s captivity, how they were people who wouldn’t be missed. The cruel master, with guards controlled and beholden to him even if they did not wish to do his bidding. Even Murong Yao, how he’d come to take vengeance, how he’d wanted it to be over, rather than to take power and continue the cycle of oppression.

His head aches it with it all, a low level background discomfort that refuses to fully fade no matter what he does to try to ease it. Memories that he no longer has access to, somehow still setting his nerves on edge. While old scars itch and ache with phantom pain, his body recalling old hurts, even when his mind does not.

Despite this there have been no new memories forthcoming, but he can feel their presence bubbling just beneath the surface. Either they will rise and become known, or they will sink back into the depths. He has no way of knowing or forcing either eventuality.

So, for all he is weary, aching with the need for rest, Di Feisheng knows he won’t manage it. Not yet, maybe not at all tonight. All he will do is grow more and more frustrated at his inability to remember or to sleep. Eventually, his restlessness will wake Fang Duobing, who will be tired and tetchy from being woken up in the middle of the night. As much fun as squabbling with him usually is, he doubts that either of them are in the mood for it. As for Li Lianhua, he definitely wouldn’t be happy if he was woken up by raised voices and breaking furniture.

If he can’t sleep then maybe he can burn off some of the restless energy boiling in his veins.

Taking his sword, Di Feisheng leaps easily down from the upper part of the Lotus Tower. There’s no sense using the stairs and potentially waking Li Lianhua. He can let them sleep, even he cannot.

Perhaps if he tires himself out then maybe he’ll be able to get an hour or two before he’s woken by the sunrise and the sound of the forest coming alive around them.

The moon is bright as he steps out into the wooded clearing, the dry autumn leaves murmur softly above him in the breeze. It’s peaceful, yet sitting in such nocturnal calm isn’t what he has in mind.

Removing his sword from its covering, Di Feisheng traces his fingertips over the embossed metal of the scabbard and hilt. It’s well looked after, although there are small nicks and scratches on it, showing how it’s been used.

It’s not just decorative piece, carried only for show. It’s a weapon first and foremost. It’s a weapon, it has been used to kill and it’s his. He knows this much with absolute certainty.

He might not remember who he is, not beyond the few fragments he’s recalled for himself, the violently unsettling dreams that disturb his rest and the half truths that Li Lianhua has provided, but his body knows this.

It is as natural to him breathing. Each move flowing effortlessly one into the next, there is no need for thought: His muscles remembering what his mind does not. It isn’t an elegant style, at least not compared to others, but it’s powerful, exacting and demanding in its own way.

He feels alive like this. Power surging through him, the sword an extension of him and his will. It’s freedom and the strength to stay that way. It's the ability to make his own way in the world, unhindered by others.

Turning fast, Di Feisheng brings his sword round in an arc, energy rippling out from it, fierce as a winter storm. Branches bend and sways above him, autumn leaves showering down, as the silver moonlight catches his blade.

Dazzlingly bright, its reflection catches his eyes. Images of another autumn night, the moon full and golden over city rooftops, flood his mind and vision.

A young man in red and white, dances in the moonlight. Sword and ribbon and body all moving in complete harmony. The youth doesn’t look like Li Lianhua, even allowing for the passage of years, but he knows with absolute certainty that he is. Younger by at least ten years, he’s moves with a grace and power that makes something seize in his chest even now.

Another night and another roof top, they fight hard and reckless, blades sliding against each other, sparks dropping like the stars in the sky. A kiss across the crossed blades, as hard, as forceful, as the fight itself. Lips and teeth and heat.

They whirl away from each other, the vision of the past fleeing with them.

Images swirl, faster and faster, the pain and pressure in his head increasing. Dropping his sword, Di Feisheng staggers, clutching at his head. There is no relief to be found. The bright, stabbing bursts of pain are accompanied by flickering arcs of light.

Another time, a bright summer day in the bamboo forest, all heat and humidity beneath the greenery. Leaves showering down, light, whirling steps as Li Lianhua runs across the thin, swaying stems, free and unstrained like the breeze himself.

The image shifts again. Clothes hanging open, trousers pushed down to his knees, Li Lianhua clings to the towering bamboo, white knuckled, shaking, mouth open as he cries out in pleasure. Kneeling on the ground in front of him, Di Feisheng can remember the weight and heat of his cock in his mouth, the bitter salt rush over his tongue.

Caught in the rising tide of memories, barely aware of anything around him, Di Feisheng staggers then falls to his knees.

The memories aren’t yet done with him.

Another day, an inn, the golden afternoon light streaming in through the window, food left untouched on the table beside books and documents, while the are on the bed.

Naked apart from a red ribbon tied over his eyes, Li Lianhua gasps and moans, love bites littering his neck and chest, nipples dark and hard from where they’ve been mercilessly pinched and teased. Legs over A-Fei's shoulders, he arches into the punishingly hard thrushes, with no concerns for how sore he’ll be afterwards.

There is no sound to this vision of the past, but he can tell that the shape of the words that falls begging from Li Lianhua’ lips isn’t his name as it is now. Anymore than the name on his own tongue isn’t Lianhua.

Xiangyi.

In the memory Li Lianhua comes, his cries becoming more and more ragged and desperate as Di Feisheng chases his own pleasure.

That memory however, is denied him, as the pain in his head flares sharply. All encompassing, there is nothing he is aware of apart from its presence, everything else spiralling away.

Laying on the ground, his head aching fiercely, Di Feisheng slowly opens his eyes. The moonlit woodland blurs around him, dizziness and nausea building until he is forced to close them once more.

Trying to relieve it by feeding energy into it won’t help. Rather it will intensify the pain in his head, while the hidden things still beat at the edge of his consciousness, refusing to reveal themselves.

If he could regain his memories in this way, no matter the pain in doing so, Di Feisheng knows that he would. But it doesn’t work like that. He knows this because he has already tried. Because he has had to deal with how it had left him feeling feverish and sick, with a splitting headache for hours afterwards.

There’s movement close to him and Di Feisheng forces himself to open his eyes, although he doesn’t feel able to do more, even to defend himself. Which is a terrifying thought. But passing out or throwing up on them aren’t viable methods of attack.

A muted blur of colour approaches, the vicious pain in his head blurring his vision, and preventing him from seeing who is it. Finally, when they are almost close enough to touch they are clear enough for him to tell that it is Li Lianhua.

“Really, A-Fei, sleeping on the ground?” Li Lianhua sounds somewhere between amused and concerned. “Xiaobao doesn’t snore that badly, does he?”

“Couldn’t sleep. I-” Di Feisheng stops with a groan. Light still shimmers inside his head, a brilliant arc as if the sun had caught his corner of his eye. It brightens and the pain flares with it, an all consuming fire inside his skull. His vision distorts further, the ground beneath him feeling like it's falling away. Which is both impressive and utterly disconcerting as he is already lying down.

“A-Fei?”

Di Feisheng can’t reply as he feels cold, careful fingers pressed to his wrist. Trying to think enough to put even a few words together sends sharp bursts of pain searing behind his eyes.

“You’re not hurt,” Li Lianhua says, although it feels more like he’s talking to himself than offering reassurance. “Are you starting to remember?”

Still unable to voice an answer, Di Feisheng risks nodding. The smallest movement he can manage without it driving either the pain, dizziness or nausea to even higher levels. All the same he can feel a cold sweat beading on his forehead and down his spine.

“Now you know why I didn’t want to hit you with too much information all at once.” Li Lianhua pats his hand, before pulling away. “It shouldn’t last more than a few hours.”

Hours of feeling like this, of being all but defenceless, isn’t what Di Feisheng wants to hear. Yet what can he do but endure it? He tries to stay as still as possible, hoping that it will bring him some relief.

Unfortunately, laying there until it passes doesn’t seem to be something that’s going to be permitted, as Li Lianhua says, “Lets get you back to bed. You can’t sleep out here.”

Then, before he can say anything to dissuade him, Li Lianhua puts an arm around him and pulls him to his feet.

Bright bursts of light and pain fill Di Feisheng’s mind like fireworks have been let off inside his skull. With a groan, he sways, clinging to Li Lianhua’s arm for balance. Even with that assistance he’s far from certain that he’s going to remain on his feet or if he is even going to cling on to consciousness at all.

“A-Fei?” There is concern rather than teasing in his voice now. “I’ve got you.”

He has and it should be terrifying to be so weak and defenceless in front of anyone. Why he thinks it should be, Di Feisheng doesn’t know. Feelings and fears born of events and memories he no longer has access to still plague him.

It should be frighting to be so helpless, but he’s safe. With Li Lianhua, despite his lies, he knows he is safe.

“Do you want me to carry you?”

“No.” It hurts to talk, but he forces the word out all the same. Although any kind of movement feels somewhere between wildly inadvisable and outright impossible, he knows he has to try. Maybe he’ll regret it in moment if he ends up face first in the leaves, but the idea of giving up this last little bit of control is too much.

Li Lianhua gives his hand another small pat. “We’ll take it slow.”

Holding onto him for support, eyes still closed as it is the only relief he can find, Di Feisheng allows himself to be walked slowly and carefully back to the Lotus Tower.

Li Lianhua doesn’t ask any further questions about what he has remembered or even how he’s feeling. Nor does he try to make him negotiate the steps up to the bedroom upstairs that he’s suppose to share with Fang Duobing. Instead he guides him to his own bed. It’s probably only due to practicality, but it feels right all the same.

“Lay down.” Li Lianhua keeps a hand cradled against he back of Di Feisheng’s head as he guides him down onto the pillow. “I’ll just be a moment.”

Not that there is anything that he can do if he’s not.

He is wondering if passing out now that he’s safely indoors is an option, when a cool, damp cloth is laid on his forehead. Then deft fingers remove metal hair piece and pin that holds it in place, so nothing presses on his aching head.

It offers a small amount of relief for which he feels pathetically grateful. He wishes that Li Lianhua would stay there beside him, would keep his cool, careful fingers against his aching head. Even if it doesn‘t provide relief it is comforting all the same.

He won’t ask for it. He won’t beg. He’ll never do that again. Not for anyone.

A flicker of something too vague to be called a memory comes to him. Begging didn’t work anyway. It only meant more pain.

He can’t chase this thought, won’t hunt down this echo of something left behind by a past that he both needs to know, yet is hesitant to fully recall. Something holds him back, tells him to let it pass, at least for now.

The world narrows to nothing but the throbbing in his head, and the surging waves of nausea and vertigo that accompany it. How long he drifts like this, Di Feisheng doesn’t know, but finally he feels the thin mattress dip and the wood frame creak as Li Lianhua sits of the edge of the bed beside him.

A moment later a bowl is held to his lips, as Li Lianhua says, “Drink. It’ll help.”

The smell of whatever questionable medicine he has made is enough to turn Di Feisheng’s stomach. The taste, if possible, is even worse. It’s a struggle to drink it, but he does. He can endure the acrid, bitterness of it, if it will make the unrelenting pain in his head go away.

All the same, as he feels a second bowl pressed to his lips, he refuses, unable to stomach anymore. “No more.”

“It’s not medicine. It’s to take the taste away.”

It could be a lie, but he trusts that he won’t hurt him. It’s warm and faintly sweet, just water with a little honey melted into it. He drinks it gratefully, glad to be rid of the lingering bitterness of the medicine.

Li Lianhua leaves for a moment, then replaces the cool cloth on his forehead, fingers lingering a little too long to be purely practical as he brushes back his hair.

The night drifts on, and the pain and dizziness begin to fade, a gradual ebbing, likely a retreating tide. Finally, Di Feisheng risks opening his eyes. His head still aches, but the pulsing light is gone, and the pain has dropped to a dull throbbing rather than something agonisingly sharp.

He remains still at first, just breathing and looking around now that the light no longer hurts his eyes.

A single lantern, dim and shuttered, hangs above the table, creating only a small pool of light over Li Lianhua. Sitting at the table, a pot of tea to his side, he looks almost asleep. Eyes are closed, his head resting against this hand, where it is propping him up.

Li Lianhua has been far kinder and more patient than Di Feisheng had expected he would be, than he’d expected anyone to be with him. He has no expectation of kindness or care. Yet why wouldn’t he be? Li Lianhua understood pain and weakness better than most. With the poison slowly taking his life, how could he not?

He watches him, the dim gold of the lamplight seem to make him glow. He had been in love with him once. Maybe he still is. That brief glimpse of the power that Li Lianhua once had, one to rival his own. They had been perfect for each other in every way. What had gone wrong? Why has Li Lianhua not been honest about it?

Di Feisheng frowns, something tickling at the edge of his consciousness, yet refusing to let itself become known. He doesn’t want to force it. Not when his head has only just stopped feeling like it’s being split open.

Perhaps now he knows a little of his past he can get Li Lianhua reveal more of what they had been to each other. It’s late, possibly not the best time to talk, but there feels like there is an urgency to it, that if he leaves it until morning all he will get is excuses.

It has to be now, he decides, in case those few precious memories he’s regained start to fade.

Wary, less the pain and dizziness return, Di Feisheng sits up slowly and carefully. They don’t, but the movement makes Li Lianhua turn to look at him.

Half asleep, Li Lianhua blinks, barely stifling a yawn, as he says, “You’re awake. How do you feel?”

It’s a reasonable question, but it catches him by surprise all the same. Di Feisheng doesn’t think he’s someone who was used to being cared for or even kept safe. Did he only ever have this with Li Lianhua? Is this why they’d had such an intimate relationship? Perhaps soon he will have answers to this. “Better.”

“You’ve regained your memories,” Li Lianhua says, as if he is stating a fact rather than asking a question.

“Some. Yes.” He could be honest with him, tell him that it is only a very few fragments, but Li Lianhua has told enough lies and half truths that Di Feisheng feels entitled to do the same. He could do. He could make him guess what he knows, getting him to reveal more by pretending to already be aware of it. It’s appealing. It makes him wonder if he was once the kind of person that lied easily to others. He doesn’t think so. Not without reason at least. All the same he wants to try it. He watches Li Lianhua for a moment, making sure he has his full attention before saying, “Were you ever going to tell me we were lovers?”

“What? We weren’t-”

Not giving him a chance to deny it, Di Feisheng interrupts. “We were. On the roof top. In the bamboo grove. At the inn. Shall I continue?”

There is a look close to panic in Li Lianhua’s eyes as he rapidly tries to think of a way of refuting it.

“Nothing to say?” Di Feisheng asks, feeling a little smug at being able to play Li Lianhua for once. “Surely you remember. A red ribbon around your eyes. You were so loud.”

“A few times ten years ago. It was never serious.” Li Lianhua turns away, pretending to busy himself with rearranging items on a shelf, buying himself some time to think. “Why would you even remember it? What useless memories to get back. I’d almost forgotten all about it.”

Di Feisheng doesn’t need to have all his memories to know that he is being evasive, nor a better light source to have seen the way his cheeks had turned pink. So it must have meant something to him. Was this denial an attempt to make the fact he’d not managed to heal him, to save him, easier to deal with? It was a stupid plan if it was. As if any way of losing him wouldn’t feel like his heart has been ripped in two.

Or had it ended badly between them?

Or maybe to Li Lianhua it really hadn’t meant much.

No, the last of these feels more like a lie than anything else. He’s seen the look Li Lianhua gets in his eyes when he thinks he can’t see him watching him. The gentle, caring touches when he knew that he was in pain. He’s seen the blush just now. The feelings are definitely there, but for whatever reason he wants to keep them hidden.

He might want that, but there had been two of them in the relationship, and Di Feisheng wants the truth. Even if they cannot regain what they once had, he wants to know what those days had meant to them.

“You say that. Yet even when I can remember nothing else, I remember you.” Getting up from the bed, Di Feisheng follows him to where Li Lianhua has retreated to fuss over potted plants instead of facing him. “Even when I know nothing about you, even when all you’ve done is lie to me, I know I want you to live.” He stops just short of touching him. “That I want you.”

“A-Fei, we-“ Li Lianhua stops, catching himself before he says more. “This is why I didn’t tell you. You’re so clingy already. Why would I want to make that worse?”

The dismissiveness of it hurts. He’s been expecting it, but it doesn’t lessen its sting. “You mean I was in love with you, but you didn’t feel the same?”

“What?” There is genuine surprising in his voice now. “No, you weren’t.”

The memories of Li Lianhua gasping and clinging to him, caught in the throws of pleasure, crying out his name, burn. For all Li Lianhua might think that there was nothing there, Di Feisheng cannot believe it. He might not have his memories but the feelings, possessive, protective, besotted, don’t feel like lies to him. “You think that? That I can’t love anyone? Was I so cruel to you?”

“So many questions, A-Fei. It’s much too late for such things.” Li Lianhua turns away, avoiding looking at him again. “Go to sleep.”

“So you’ll talk about in the morning?” There is nothing Di Feisheng can do stop the hurt bleeding into the anger in voice. “Am I suppose to believe that?”

“You can believe what you want.”

It’s a risk, maybe it doesn’t mean anything or maybe it will anger him. Regardless, Di Feisheng can’t think of a better idea. “Maybe you’re right. Maybe I didn’t love Li Lianhua, but there was no Li Lianhua back then, was there?” He pauses a moment, seeing Li Lianhua’s shoulders tense, then he drops the rest. “The was only Li Xiangyi, who cried out my name as I took him.”

There is a thud as the water dipper that Li Lianhua had picked up falls to the floor.

So that was true as well. As horrible as the headache had been, Di Feisheng finds that he can now place it in the category of worth it. “Aren’t you going to say something? Deny it or tell another lie?”

“What would be the point?” Li Lianhua sounding weary rather than angry that this part of their past known to them both once more. “You’ve already made up your mind.”

“I know what I felt.” What I still feel.

“It didn’t…” There is no conviction in Li Lianhua’s voice at all.

“Don’t tell me it didn’t mean anything. Even if I was nothing to you. I know what I felt.”

“It wasn’t that. We…” Li Lianhua stops and sighs, the weight of those memories pressing down on him. He steadies himself, hands flat against the table top, eyes down cast. “Let it stay in the past, A-Fei. Neither of us are who we were.”

“Does that matter?”

He still doesn’t look up. “How could it not?”

Although Li Lianhua has refused to admit to any feelings for him, his actions speak far louder than any of his half hearted denials. There is one way this makes sense, albeit of an awful kind, that hurts more than it helps. “You’re lying to protect me.”

Weary, seemingly resigned to his fate, Li Lianhua’s shoulders droop, what little fight he had left in his vanishing. “What good would the truth be to you now?”

He has a point. What good would there have been in telling him that yes, once they’d been in love, but then something had happened, and now Li Lianhua was going to die. He was going to die because he hadn’t been strong enough or fast enough to save him.

Despite this, he still thinks that it isn’t a good point, because as horrible as that truth might be, Di Feisheng is certain he would rather know. Even if it only to make the most of every moment left to them.

“I’m going to remember it all in the end,” Di Feisheng says, walking up behind him, until they touch. “Were you hoping you’d be gone by then? That you wouldn’t have to face it? or me?”

When Li Lianhua doesn’t answer or move away, he puts his arms around him, holding him close, not willing to let him run out on answering. “You’re not a coward or a fool, regardless of what you pretend to be. Is self sacrifice so appealing to you? Do want to be thought of as a hero?”

There is an unsteady edge to his voice as Li Lianhua finally replies, “You’ve told me that before.”

“That you’re a fool?”

“That I want to be hero,” he says quietly, caught in memories of his own. “That it’s my greatest weakness.”

“Was I wrong?” Di Feisheng pauses, then adds, “Am I wrong now?”

Li Lianhua doesn’t answer. Instead he seems to sag, exhaustion finally getting the better of him.

Holding him close, Di Feisheng turns him in his arms until he is facing him. “I don’t know when I said that to you or why, but I don’t think I was wrong either.”

He strokes his hand along Li Lianhua’s jaw, as he’d done in his memories. Relief and even hope blossoms as he leans into it, rather than pulls away.

“Heroes get hurt. They pointlessly throw themself into danger for others who don’t appreciate it or deserve it. I don’t think I wanted that for you back then. For you to be hurt or used. I know I don’t want it for you now.”

Li Lianhua leans into his touch, eyes closing.

Di Feisheng can feel how cold he is, how exhaustion is truly taking hold. Heading out into the night to find him, helping him back inside, brewing medicine for him and then waiting up to see if it worked rather than resting, has cost him.

He holds him tighter. It feels good, right. He needs to keep him like this, needs him in arms. “Come to bed.”

“It’s my bed.” There is a soft huff of annoyance, as Li Lianhua adds, “I don’t need an invitation.”

“So I do?” Part of Di Feisheng wants to take this chance to kiss him, to see if he can shake loose something more than lies and half truths from him. Yet they aren’t quite at that point yet. He can wait for that.

Being able to rest can’t wait though. Now the pain in his head is almost gone exhaustion if fast taking its place. It’s unsurprising really. He’s slept poorly every night that he can remember since first waking up here, and pain is wearying by itself.

“Do you want me to go up and disturb Fang Duobing?” Di Feisheng says, although he has little intention of doing it. “Should I let him know that you were called-”

“Don’t you dare.”

There is something close to real fear or worry in his voice. Which is… interesting. “So he doesn’t know your other name. Why?”

“He doesn’t need to.”

It is possible that what he has said it truth. Di Feisheng has no idea about why Li Lianhua is called that now rather than Li Xiangyi. It's also equally possible that it's very important and he lying through his teeth about it. “He’ll find out eventually.”

“Eventually isn’t right now,” he snaps back. “So, don’t tell him.”

There’s nothing to be gained by arguing about it, so Di Feisheng replies, “I won’t, but I won’t do anything to stop him finding out either.”

He expects that to earn him another rebuke, but instead there is a soft laugh from Li Lianhua, as he shakes his head. “Still the same A-Fei, no matter what.” The laugh and smile fade, weariness that’s more than just physical creeping back in. “Don’t tell him.”

“I told you I won’t.” He strokes Li Lianhua’s cheek, a brush of fingertip, moving away a stray hair. “So I get to sleep here tonight?”

“Just sleep.”

“What else would we be doing?” Di Feisheng says with an innocence that they both know is fake. All the same, doing anything more strenuous than resting doesn’t seem wise. Yet if it was something Li Lianhua wanted, Di Feisheng knows that he wouldn’t say no.

They get ready for bed quickly, the night already cold and late. Lying down beside each other, their shoulders touch, the bed too small for them not to.

“All the times we were in bed together, we never just slept.” Li Lianhua says softly into the dark. “There was always some other matter to attend to. Something more urgent to deal with.”

“We were young.” Laying a hand on Li Lianhua, Di Feisheng starts to draw him closer. “We thought we had forever.”

There is no reply or resistance from Li Lianhua, only a shaky little sigh. An admission at last that this is a lot for him.

It’s probably too cruel to say such a thing to a dying man, and Di Feisheng finds that he regrets saying it. All the same he doesn’t apologise for it, there’s nothing to be gained by it.

“No more thinking and no more talking,” Li Lianhua says, prodding him, a finger against his ribs. “It’s late and I need my sleep. So either stop talking or go wake up Xiaobao and bother him.”

“I thought you told me not to.”

“I told you not to tell him about that, not that you can never speak to him.” Li Lianhua pushes half-heartedly at the arm Di Feisheng has around him. “What are you doing?”

“Keeping you warm,” Di Feisheng replies, not loosening the arm around him. There is something rather endearing about how sleepy and grumpy he is at the same time. “You’re cold. I’m not. It’s practical.”

Li Lianhua makes an indignant noise, but doesn’t try to move away. Then, after a moment or two, he settles more comfortably into his arms, sinking into the offered warmth.

It doesn’t take long for Di Feisheng to feel Li Lianhua drift off to sleep, too exhausted to stay awake any longer. He watches him sleep, a faint outline in the fading lamplight. The barely remembered past overlayed onto the uncertain present.

He knows it won’t be easy to get Li Lianhua to admit whether he was in love with him back then, any more than it will be make him admit what is between them now. Perhaps Li Lianhua had even believed that there had been no feelings involved. Di Feisheng knows his own heart, and he won’t leave him in any doubt this time.

There are two things that Di Feisheng knows with absolute certainty are the truth, and they both concern Li Lianhua. The first is that he wants him to live. The second is that he is in love with him.

He will find out who he was and who Li Xiangyi was, he will find out what was done to him and why. He will find a way to save him, to bring him back to being an equal in all things. He will help the barely hidden embers of fondness still in him burst in flames of passion once more. He wants to make him shake with pleasure again, to hear him, to feel him.

What had happened between them that they had broken apart? Why had they been separated for so many years? Had they been? He only has Li Lianhua’s dubiously honest words that they had been apart for years.

Despite the warm covers and Di Feisheng laying by his side, his arm draped across him, Li Lianhua starts to shiver in his sleep, the poison in him leaving him cold and aching in even when he tries to rest.

Rolling onto his side, Di Feisheng pulls him closer, spooning against his back, so they are pressed together from shoulder to thigh. There is a practical element to sharing body heat like this, and he does hope the warmth of being held close will help ease the painful cold in him. There is a sense of satisfaction too, that he can do this, that he is allowed to do this, that whatever happened between them in the past Li Lianhua still trusts him. More than anything though, it feels right to hold him, like he is meant to fit into his arms.

Perhaps it’s too sentimental and it’s certainly not something that he’d ever say out loud, but Li Lianhua is the only part of his past that Di Feisheng can remember with fondness or joy. The memories he has of him, as fleeting as they are, are ones he wants keep forever. They are proof that at least some of his past had been happy. That it hadn’t all been the vicious, terrible things that have come to him in nightmares, ones where he is a child, his hands red with blood of the boys he’s killed, their screams ringing in his ears.

A shudder runs through him, and Di Feisheng presses his face in to Li Lianhua’s hair, letting their closeness soothe his tired, ragged nerves.

Whether the man in his arms is called Li Lianhua or Li Xiangyi, or even another name that’s not yet know, it doesn’t matter to him. How can it when it doesn’t truly know his own?

Why would names matter at all? he tells himself. As no matter whatever they call themselves or however long they’ve been parted they have found their way back to each other. He can’t say if he has ever truly believed in fate, he’s not sure he does even now, but it feels like they are meant to be together.

Let me have this. A silent plea to whatever kind deity might listen to the words in his heart, even though he cannot yet speak them aloud, even if he never can. If I can have nothing else, even if I can never remember another thing about who I was for the rest of my life, let him live and let us have this.

Outside, autumn rain clouds have hidden the moon, the soft patter of it falling on the roof and trees fills the night air. While warm and dry, they lay together, held close in bed.

Di Feisheng lets his breathing match Li Lianhua’s, slow and steady in sleep. For once he feels truly at peace. He’s lived this long and so has Li Lianhua. He’ll find a way to keep him safe and to save him.

Finally, on the edge of sleep, he presses his lips to Li Lianhua cheek. A far chaster kiss than those in his memories, it’s a reassurance that all is well, and a promise too, of a future he wants them to share.

Li Lianhua murmurs something in his sleep, contented rather than annoyed. Beneath the covers, his hand seeks out Di Feisheng’s, holding it tight, like he’s never going to let go.

In the dark and quiet of the room, only their breathing and the gentle fall out rain disturb the silence, Di Feisheng finally sleeps. Tomorrow can take care of itself, for tonight at least he has everything that he wants right here in his arms.

[bokvshou]

can we please mention how jiang cheng didn't own a dog for years even after wei wuxian died?

(and as much as he probably loves fairy, it's not his dog, it's jin ling's).

after wwx's death there really was no reason to go along with the rule of ​​not allowing dogs on Lotus Pier, there was no one there with a phobia anymore, wei wuxian left, abandoned jc, he became the enemy of all the clans and their mothers, and then he died. poof, gone forever. jc was free to adopt some fluffy friends, we know perfectly well how much he loves dogs and he honestly deserved that little happiness.

and yet.

and yet, he never did. he never got a dog.

perhaps, jiang cheng wanted to have his home ready, just in case. because wwx wouldn't step foot in there if he found a dog, and that was unacceptable.

a part deep inside himself still hoping desperately, clinging to an impossible dream and a broken promise, an anguished wish where wei wuxian would return, one day.

[silverflame2724]

All it took was a simple lie.

Jiang Fengmian was tired of the accusations, of the rumors on the streets, of the scorn from his wife. Ever since he had brought little Wei Ying back from the streets, Jiang Fengmian had to deal with so much stress. But it was worth it. To care for the child of his best friends, it was worth it.

It was true that he loved Cangse. He loved her personality, her laugh, the freedom she represented. But the moment she rejected him, Jiang Fengmian had backed off and stuck with friendship instead. It wouldn’t have worked out between them anyways. Cangse lived her freedom and that was the one thing Jiang Fengmian couldn’t give her. So he was sontent with the friendship and even more so when she proposed to Wei Changze.

The two of them, his most favorite people in the world, would get married and stay in Lotus Pier. They would help him teach his disciples, show them the joys and hardships of life, help him out with the sect.

But that kind of wishful thinking was shattered when he was forced to marry Yu Ziyuan. Jiang Fengmian never wanted her. True, she was a strong, capable woman. But her personality grated against his and he knew he would crumble beneath her. But it was his terrible mother’s wish to see them married and he could not go against her as his father supported the marriage as well.

So he got engaged to Yu Ziyuan and had to get to know her. And she….wasn’t as bad as he thought her to be. Sure, she was volatile but underneath all of that, she was a wonderful woman. That’s what he thought, at least, until he found out that she had forced his friends away from Lotus Pier.

Evidently, rumors about his previous infatuation with Cangse had reached her ears and with his mother’s help, kicked Wei Changze and Cangse Sanren away from him.

Jiang Fengmian grew resentful of the two after that. But perhaps he should have done more to comfort Yu Ziyuan that he didn’t like Cangse that way.

Well, what’s done is done. He can’t change the past. But he can do something right now.

He had found Wei Ying sobbing and on the floor, a red handprint on his cheek with Yu Ziyuan standing over him.

With a shout, he gathered Wei Ying towards him and questioned Yu Ziyuan, “Why did you hit him?!”

The woman scoffed. “Why can’t I? He caused trouble so he should be punished for it.”

“He’s nine! What kind of trouble could he have caused?”

“Does it matter?” She sneered. “You would always have come to this brat’s rescue. Even though you would never do the same for our son! Or am I right? That this brat is your child with that woman!!”

“I have never even touched Cangse in that manner, how dare you! I would never betray Changze like that!!”

“Well how am I supposed to know?! He looks so similar to you! And with the way that that woman flirted, you would think—”

“YU ZIYUAN! Don’t you dare complete that sentence!! There’s a child here!”

“Oh? Why can’t I? That brat deserves to hear what kind of a woman his mother was!”

Jiang Fengmian shook with anger. Without thinking too much, he blurted out something to make her stop. (Something he wished was true.) “Wei Ying is my nephew, San-Niang!! Wei Changze was my half brother! Why wouldn’t I care for the last reminder of him?!”

Silence reigned in the room save for Jiang Fengmian’s enraged breaths and Wei Ying’s sniffling.

“…..What?” Yu Ziyuan breathed. “He’s…..”

Jiang Fengmian just computed what he said. But he would push forward with it. “He’s my nephew. My father had a tryst with a woman and Changze was born. I never knew until my father had told me so on his deathbed.” Jiang Fengmian could only thank the starts that both his parents were dead and wouldn’t be able to contest against this. “I never brought it up to save our reputation. Are you happy now?”

Yu Ziyuan still seemed in shock so Jiang Fengmian took this time to retreat.

“I hope I never see anything like this again, my lady.”

He closed the door.

[sigyns-drafts]

Hi! May I ask for a Buddha with a fem reader who is very similar to Jataka? She is very sweet on the outside, but has a calm, stoic personality. She struggles with lack of desire and depression.

A/N: Hello! Of course you can, I hope you enjoy what I managed to write from your request!! ♡

You remind me so much of him 💙💛

Buddha & fem!reader

➩ Y/N was just resting under a bodhi tree, the weight of sadness hanging heavily upon her. Though luckily enough for her Buddha, someone she is very close with sees her and realized right away something was up.

He was prepared to comfort her, and only her until they soon found themselves both comforting each other. Sharing things they'd never spoken about and their bond growing ever so stronger!

➩ Reader type: platonic/romantic comfort with Buddha & Fem!reader

⚠: depression, discussion of loosing a loved one and then finding comfort in someone similar to said loved one.

In the tranquil gardens of the monastery, where the fragrance of blooming lotus flowers fell with the soft rustle of leaves, Buddha found Y/N sitting alone beneath the shade of a Bodhi tree.

Her tan skin glowed softly in the dappled sunlight, and her long locks of white hair flowed around her like a shimmering waterfall.

Approaching her with gentle steps, Buddha sensed the weight of melancholy that hung heavy upon Y/N's shoulders.

He knew the struggle all too well, the feeling of sadness that he had suppressed for quite sometime.

It was Y/N who in specific had reminded him too much of this one, certain person he could never get out of his mind.

His beloved older brother, Jakata, who had departed this world long ago.

Maybe that's why he was sticking around this woman for so long, Buddha sometimes would ask himself.

Or perhaps it was because of her sweet personality and calm, stoic demeanour.

"Y/N," Buddha said softly, his voice carrying a soothing warmth.

"I can tell when something is off. Tell me, what weighs upon your heart this evening?"

Y/N looked up, her dark blue eyes reflecting a mix of sorrow and gratitude at Buddha's presence.

She wished nothing more than for Buddha to start worrying about her!

"Oh..it's this emptiness inside me," she confessed, her voice barely above a whisper.

"But please, I wouldn't want to bother you by sharing my sorrows Buddha!"

Buddha chuckled to himself before taking a seat beside Y/N, gently taking her hand in his, offering her his full support.

"No, let me hear every last bit Y/N. I know how it can be sometimes and holding it in isn't the way, so please speak whenever~"

Nervous and hestinant at first Y/N wasn't sure how to exactly describe her delema and what she was feeling, until the words just started to pour out of her mouth like running water.

"I lack desire for anything, the motivation in doing my daily tasks are gone and the weight of this despair suffocates me.."

Buddha nodded understandingly, his own memories of despair and longing resurfacing. She must've been suffering from a deep depression for whatever reason.

"I, too, have felt this suffocating feeling, you know Y/N. You remind me of someone who was once very important to me."

Buddha began, his voice resonating with empathy. Y/N would look at Buddha, raising an eyebrow of concern. He had never opened up to anyone like this before, not to her own knowledge at least!

"Oh? Who is it, please I'm willing to listen in return for your kindness and understanding!"

"My older brother, his name was Jakata. He looked just like you..a spinning fair image."

"Jakata huh? We're we similar in personalities too, if I may ask."

Y/N said with a small smile widening on her lips as she tilting her head. Buddha only nodded in response, smiling back at her.

"He was, but you're even sweeter. Just remember this, dear Y/N, even in the depths of despair, there lies the seed of enlightenment."

As Buddha spoke, his words wove a tapestry of wisdom and compassion, helping Y/N in understanding and finding her eventual hope in getting back on her feet.

"I'll support you through your rough times like you've always done for me Y/N."

"D-Done for you..? What could I have possibly done to help you."

"My simply existing and coming into my life."

Moved by Buddha's words Y/N almost felt herself speechless, she wasn't aware of Buddha's own struggles. Let alone the fact she had been helping him with simply being herself around him.

Tears swelled up in her eyes dark blue eyes, almost as deep as the oceans itself, as she quickly took a deep breath to calm herself.

"Thank you Buddha, truly I.. I don't know what to say. Could you be this seed of enlightenment then?"

Buddha just looked away from her, grinning and suddenly pulling her close into a hug from the side. With each passing moment, Y/N felt the weight of her burdens begin to lift, replaced by a sense of clarity and peace.

Knowing that In Buddha's presence, not only could she find refuge from the storm raging within her, but help him as well.

[wangxianficfinder]

Fic Finder

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1. Hi! I’m looking for a fic I read on AO3, I don’t remember anything really more than that there was some kind of big entity in a town which noone but Wei Ying could see? The other character’s would be like ”nothing is wrong with this town :-)”. Thankful for help! Have a nice day and thank you for your work <3

#1, can u ask the requestor is Wei ying lived at the edge of the woods/forest ??

FOUND! Not What We May Be by brooklinegirl (E, 29k, WangXian, Post-Canon, Mutual Pining, Bedsharing, casefic, Hurt/Comfort) though its not only wwx who sees it. Great fic.

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2. Hello! I'm trying to find a fic where LWJ was cursed/blessed by his mom with a truth spell for LWJ's safety? It's not really the typical, your average "I speak the truth" one, but it's how LWJ can hear lies in the form of sounds that only he can hear! If i remember correctly, LXC knows about it and asked NMJ (blunt truths) and NHS (white lies) to help him control it. There's also scenes where he's stumped because WWX almost always speak the truth (thus making no lie detector sound for LWJ — which boggles him so much because no one always speak the whole truths even in CR — except the couple of times when he was speaking about his time in Lotus Pier). Thank you! (I'm pretty sure this is a fic by @i-like-plan-m but I can't remember the name rn 😅 - Mod C)

FOUND! in the shadow of moonlit flowers by Reverie (cl410) (T, 48k, wangxian, LXC/NMJ, cloud recesses, NHS & LWJ friendship, developing relationship, LWJ pov, minor injuries, autistic LWJ, implied/referenced child abuse, aka YZY warning, genius WWX, light angst, hurt/comfort, WWX protection squad, WIP) this one perhaps?

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3. hi i’ve been looking for a fic that i read a while ago but can’t remember what it’s called. Basically WWX is hired by LWJ for company/sex and he’s kinda like a sugar baby and stays at his house a lot. LWJ is a rich lan and both end up having feelings for eachother but bc LWJ started basically as WWXs client of sorts there’s some confusion. I remember at one point WWX gets sick and lets LWJ come to his house which he usually wouldn’t do with past clients and LWJ helps him shower and there’s a line where he talks abt the intimacy of letting LWJ wash his crotch (pretty sure he lives w wen qing) Then i think LWJ takes WWX to like new york or something on a work trip

these were the only things i could remember lol @st3wartladle​

FOUND? The Sugar Daddy AU Series by vesna (mrsronweasley) (E, 106k, wangxian, modern, sugar daddy, sex work, dom/sub, aftercare, semi-public sex, exhibitionism, bondage, boundary setting, relationship negotiation) specifically the first part A Sure Thing

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4. Hi! For the fic finder, two fics I enjoyed but apparently failed to bookmark, and now cannot find back...

A) Complete, medium length: Lan Zhan steps into the path of Wen Zhuliu coming for Wei Ying, loses his golden core. Afterwards, he tells no one but goes into seclusion. WWX is fine, and eventually comes to visit in Gusu. LWJ is reclusive as he is not a cultivator anymore (so he grows old faster than WWX), but they still build a connection. No solution for the golden core, just dealing with the new facts of life for LWJ, and building back some hope.

B) Similar in vibes, also complete: WWX travels to an alternative universe, where JC died and WWX is somehow the Jiang Sect Leader. He meets LWJ at a conference. The new universes' WWX was not friends with LWJ. LWJ's leg was still broken after the Wen Indoctrination and never healed, so LWJ is wheelchair bound (pushed by Jingyi). WWX builds up a friendship with LWJ but I think in the end he goes back to his own universe. This one sounds like that one fic where the theme was something like 'be careful what you wish for', iirc WWX wanted to see either his parents or JYL alive 🤔 ~Mod L

Any help would be much appreciated! As well as any other dimension travel recs anyone has. Thanks again for this wonderful blog! @vasterthanempires

I found 4A myself! It was love some littler things by shipyrds

4B remains elusive, although the comments so far seem to refer to the same fic. still looking for it!

4A)

FOUND! love some littler things by shipyrds (G, 17k, WangXian, Canon Divergence, Angst, LWJ Loses His Golden Core, Canon Divergence, No Golden Core Transfer, Angst with a Happy Ending, Angst with a Hopeful Ending, Disability)

4B I have read but also cannot recall! Additional details, it was an alternate dimension talisman WWX created, and when he leaves any changes he might have cause are erased but somehow wheelchair!LZ starts an actual friendship with local!WWX? not sure if it was a bonus chapter or an endnote but I recall I was happy that it was a hair ending for both sets...

4B)

FOUND? empty as the sky by incendir (T, 23k, wangxian, JYL & WWX, CSSR & WWX, be careful what you wish for)

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5. Howdy fine folks of the internet! I'm looking for a Twitter thread fic that disappeared from my bookmarks during some twitter turmoil, if any of yall can help. It was a modern au where wwx got kicked out of the Jiang home and stayed in a shed on school property while using the school showers and eating leftovers from the cafeteria overnight, until lqr, lxc, and nmj catch him. It had some really great depictions of panic attacks and I want back. Thanks

FOUND! Where is home? by SpicyRamen_10969 (M, 16k, wangxian, modern, high school au, implied/referenced child abuse, implied/referenced homophobia, coming out, not Jiang family friendly, supportive LQR, good sibling LXC, fluff, angst w happy ending, WIP)

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6. Hi, I'm looking for a fic where lan xichen had harsh realization of his wrong doing by supporting jin guangyao. (If this is actually an Itmf let me know and I will move it - Mod C)

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7. Hi, I've been trying to find this wangxian fic so badly. Like canon divergence lan xichen notices that wei ying likes lan zhan during cloud reases arc and starts convincing his teachers to change their style for him and his ADHD Genius and teach him about his own self worth so as to steal him away from Jiang sect. Like Jiang chan has an argument where Wei Ying finally stands up to him and it's so good. Think its ABO, dont remember. Please help

FOUND? might be 💖 Hoards and treasures by apathyinreverie (T, 21k, WangXian, Siblings, Family, not particularly Jiang friendly, YZY Bashing, slightly darker Gusu Lans, LXC being the best brother, Some manipulation, But with the best of intentions, and not between wangxian, Dragon LWJ, Fox WWX, Smitten LWJ, Fluff, perfect happiness, adorable WWX, Romance, Some worldbuilding, courting) although it's FoxWWX and DragonLans not A/B/O

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8. Hello <3 I'm looking for a modern AU fic where Lan Wangji contracts Mo Xuanyu as a companion for the night but mistakes him for Wei Wuxian in the hotel they would meet up. So they spend the whole night together and the chemistry is off the charts until Mo Xuanyu sends him a message later (or in the morning after, I can't exactly remember) saying that he never showed up. Lan Wangji tells Wei Wuxian about the misunderstanding and Wei Ying, who was thrilled with his attention, gets pretty hurt and they end things pretty tense. I remember that it's the anniversary of the passing of his mother or her anniversary, and Lan Wangji didn't want to spend it alone. After he explains that to Wei Ying, they try giving their date another chance. That's all I remember for sure that happens, I hope these details are enough!

FOUND! Many happy returns. by orange_crushed (E, 25k, WangXian, Modern AU, Mistaken Identity, Misunderstandings, Grief/Mourning, Loss of Parent(s), Implied/Referenced Suicide, Past Suicide of a Parent, References to Depression, Anxiety, Therapy, References to Anti-Depressant Medications, Escort Service, Loneliness, Everybody’s Abandonment Issues, Angst and Fluff and Smut, Angst with a Happy Ending, Domestic Fluff, Moving In Together, Oral Sex, Penetrative Sex, Hopeful Ending, Recovery, References to Escorting/Sex Work but No Actual Escorting/Sex Work)  

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9. I need help on finding a fic. It's about how wei wuxian created his own sect from a past syndicate movements, he transformed it into a merchant/shops/silk road or something similar. He never went with the jiangs or any sects. When he was still on the streets he got betrayed by an "esteemed" cultivator because of false accusations (vendor told the cultivator that he caught wei wuxian stealing from him, but in actuality wei wuxian was at the wrong place at the wrong time), it was another kid that stole a toy from a merchant, if I'm not wrong. He was also a part of an illegal underground fights where he "won the bet" against the strongest fighter. He's also claimed by wen qing to be the killer of a murder because the only one who knows around needles is herself, and she met wei wuxian and taught him the arts of needles. There's also a wei wuxian - xue yang connection by said syndicate because the chang sect was a part of it.

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10. hi! i was wondering if you could help me find this one fanfic that i can't for the love of me remember at all!!!

the details are a bit hazy, but basically burial mounds era something happens that fucks up wei wuxian mentally and physically and he starts dreaming about things in the future,,,, meanwhile the whole jianghu is plunged into chaos with disasters and that one specific bird thing.

i think there was one time wei wuxian did a "no shit serlock!" joke but then said "oh wait, wrong timeline."

FOUND? To Ride A Stygian Tiger by Madyamisam (M, 93k, WIP, WangXian, Canon Divergence, Time travel, Angst with a happy ending, BAMF WWX, Dark LWJ, Slow burn, Family Feels, Misunderstandings)

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11. hwoooooo! :D back at it again with the asks, thank you so much for your services to the community!

im looking for a time travel fic for my bff!

it's in Lwj's pov in which he dreams about an older version of him, who tells him to treat wei ying kindly, and how the future lwj's world is completely frozen as a result of his sacrifice in order to safe a different timeline.

Future Lwj gets a happy ending in the last chapter!

FOUND? 💖 Looking at You Always, All Ways by Keysmashed T, 29k, wangxian, time travel fix-it, fluff, nostalgia, mild angst w/ happy ending)

~*~

12. hi! i'm looking for a fic where there was quarantine and wangxian went to stay at the family house (it was so big like a mansion or an apartment i don't really remember).

remember a scene where jingyi was having a panic attack (?) and wei ying came to calm him down. they were at the balcony. i think they were adopting jingyi.

i don't know if it is finished or deleted.

~*~

13. hello!! i hope y’all are doing well ☺️ the fic I’m looking for was definitely on ao3 but idk if it got deleted or I just can’t find it again but here’s what I remember

1) Wei wuxian died taking the arrows to save jin zixuan’s life. Initially people celebrated until the (sentient) burial mounds retaliated and destroyed most of the jin sect and people started panicking and trying to bring back wwx (jin zixuan, jin ling, and Jiang yanli all live)

2) parts of Wei wuxian’s diary was scattered amongst the cultivation world and Jin ling buys the pages and develops a sort of parasocial relationship w his dead uncle who he idolizes based on the image he creates of him thru wwx’s writing

3) i think one of the latest updates (it wasn’t finished when I read it) is wwx coming back as Mo xuanyu and running into jin ling and jiang cheng who recognize him.

Im pretty sure the wens are alive as well (not 100% tho). If this rings any bells please let me know - I’ve seriously looked for this for a solid couple of weeks and I loved it a lot 😭 thank you!! 💓

FOUND? To Be Named by Suibian_613 (T, 18k, WIP, WangXian, XuanLi, Canon Divergence, WQ is out of character, Everyone is probably ooc, canonical violence, Canonical Character Death, Somewhat Sentient Burial Mounds)

FOUND? I shall pay for all your sorrows by MidnightLightHowlite (G, 3k, JZX & WWX, XuanLi, angst with bitter ending)

~*~

14. A fanfic where Wei Wuxian is found by Lan Qiren as he saves him from something and then faints. It’s a modern AU, Lan Qiren takes him to the hospital and later they learn that he has fits and he becomes a teacher at the school. Lan Zhan and he marries later on and adopts Wen Yuan from an orphanage run by Wen Qing and Wen Ning. @hebbbb

FOUND? Against Entropy by Duochanfan (M, 40k, WangXian, NieLan, Modern AU, Attempted Rape/Non-Con, of an underaged character, Amnesia, Drama, Romance, Family Feels, Hurt WWX, Older JC, Homelessness, Angst with a Happy Ending, Protective LWJ, Protective LXC, Supportive LXC, Protective NMJ, Supportive LQR)

~*~

15. Hi I want to ask is there a wangxian fanfiction where lan zhan is a prince and wei wuxian is a huli jing and becomes his consort by forced marriage but instead wei ying is against this loveless marriage and so everytime they sleep it's always hate s£× until he gets preg and gives birth to a yuan and tries his best to give him love until he dies protecting a yuan from a wen attack and that day he realises wangji actually loved him dies and gets reincarnated and tries to fix things @random-online-reader

~*~

16. Hi there! I am looking for a fic that takes place during the war against the wens and mo xuanyu does the self sacrifice to summon wwx who is thought to project himself as his original form, but (SPOILERS) he is immortal and lwj is the reincarnation of his lover. Baoshan Sanren also makes an appearance after the last stand against wen ruohan

FOUND? Old Foreshadows by protos_metazu_ison (M, 15k, WangXian, YLLZ WWX, BAMF WWX, War, Universe Alteration, Sunshot Campaign, Rated For Violence, Timeline What Timeline)

~*~

17. Hello, can you help me find a fic?

Generally, all I remember was that WWX went back to the past (Studying at GusuLan Arc) after dying during the Burial Mound Siege. He was so traumatized over it that he has decided he does not want anything to do with the cultivation world anymore. His personality changed (from cheerful to downright depressed, from lively to soulless) so much that everyone began to notice and wondered what was up.

However, I remember a scene which pushed him to flee Gusu. He was walking and listening as NHS talked and talked trying to get him back to his old personality. They met NMJ on the way. WWX on pilot mode said that he (NMJ) has heart demons and without ado removed the resentful energy lingering inside NMJ. This shocked the Nie brothers, the Twin jades and JC (the latter two having just arrived and witnessed WWX manipulating resentful energy).

WWX obviously panicked, packed his belongings and flees from GusuLan because he thought they would kill him again due to his manipulation of resentful energy.

Please help me find this fic. I've been searching the web for weeks. Sadly, my browser history was disabled at that time and I don't remember the title. @heratheslytherinqueen

FOUND? Possible Works 2 - Numb by Hauntcats (M, 6k, wangxian, angst w happy ending, unhappy WWX, time travel fix-it)

FOUND? Without end by barisan (M, 70k, wangxian, major character death, time travel, suicide attempt, hurt/comfort, depressed WWX, protective LWJ, good uncle LQR, bad parents JFM & YZY, not YZY & JFM & Jiang friendly, implied/referenced child abuse & self harm, BAMF WWX, WIP)

~*~

18. So there was this fic in which wei wuxian modified nei huaisang's fan or something like that so it can be used as a weapon while in CR and also at some point nmj wrote a letter thanking him and asking him what he would like as payment but wwx replied that it was a gift for a friend

I don't think this was a major plot point of the story though. Thanks

FOUND? Eyes Wide Shut by Netrixie (T, 65k, LXC/NMJ, wangxian, canon divergence, no sunshot, everyone lives au, enemies to friends to lovers, identity porn, mistaken identity, misunderstanding, slow burn) when I read that I immediately thought of this fic just bc it sounds so similar, but it's lxc that gives nhs the fan, and nmj gets mad at lxc for it. and also it's nielan. maybe this is what you're looking for?

~*~

19. Hi again! I'm in need of help for finding a fic that I forgot to bookmark AGAIN🥹

How i remember it, It's how WWX died and get "resurrected" as a ghost thing by another character (could be Hua Cheng, could be Luo Binghe idk they definitely wore robes with the color red and black lol). So WWX started chatting with his "savior" and they told him that he can grow powerful by eating other demons in the BM(?) But as he grew powerful, he also shapeshifted as a white tiger for a while because he needs to hunt to maintain his human form, and by doing so he needs a lot of demon meat so he needs to catch food with his tiger form a lot (I'm kinda confusing myself if WWX started as a tiger from beginning or not, but it definitely involves him as a ghost/tiger!)

Other details that I kinda remember: 1) he re-introduced himself to the cultivation world as "Wei Wuqian" or something similar, he thought it was funny 2) nearby people who lived around the place WWX would hunt depicted him as a guardian/god and would gift him some spicy meat as prayers 3) said people would defend him when cultivators were trying to hunt this weirdly nice, babysitting as a secondary job, only likes his meat spicy tiger kitty that they call "evil spirit, dangerous and needs to be gone" 4) I think he has white hair but can change to black, it could be somewhat glowing hair but I'm not sure about this detail 5) LWJ definitely tried the "give big kitty spice and he'll play nice" trick he got from the village people to see if it was a malevolent ghost or not 6) tiger!WWX had been written eating a corpse in the fic at least once

FOUND? Wuqian, the Local God of Yiling by Grace_ShadowWolf (TaubeLePigeon) (M, 77k, wangxian, WWX & LSZ & LWJ, major character death, canon divergence, angst w/ happy ending, god WWX, Chinese mythology & folklore, pining, temporary character death, WIP)

~*~

20. Hi, I'm looking for the the story I've read before. I think it's about Wuxian are cursed to feel pain each time Jiang Wanyin close to him at Cloud recesses. It's kinda Jiang Wanyin bashing. I think Wei Wuxian took the cursed meant for Lan Wangji.

FOUND? I’ll Take the Path of Thorns by Admiranda (G, 6k, wangxian, cloud recesses study era, curses, not JC friendly, clever WWX, baby wangxian)

~*~

[paimonial-rage]

hi! hope you're doing great! i saw your game post and i'll give you the "dragon househusband" title :) 🤍

((This is a kinda weird Genshin title prompt request, but I’ll do my best!!))

Dragon House-Husband

[title ask game]

You yawned softly and curled even tighter around your pillow. The sun shining through your window warmed your bed, but not even it could replace the presence that was usually at your side. In the back of your mind, you wondered where he was. Making breakfast, perhaps? He usually woke up before you, opting for a walk before starting the day.

As if to confirm your suspicions, a smile pulled at your lips as your nose caught the scent of fried lotus crisps in the air. Really, your husband was too good to you. After such a long week of building houses, only he would be so sweet as to make a such beloved dish from your childhood. You honestly had no clue why he preferred to spoil you rotten so often like this.

Another yawn pulled itself from your throat as you finally stood and stretched your limbs. With the amount they were popping and cracking, you wondered if you would visit the city later on for a massage.

Though you were an illuminated beast, your parents did not wish for you to make a contract with Rex Lapis as an adeptus. They wished for you to live free like the wind. To ensure that, they set you up with a job at a carpenters’ guild. With your enhanced strength and experience with Sister Tubby, you were perfect for the job. That being said, it was hard and busy work. You were glad you had someone to care for the home while you were gone.

You were sure not to put everything on your husband though. While the job that kept him busy in the past was no more, he still enjoyed keeping himself occupied with things to do. Perhaps you could make something from your homeland tonight. He always enjoyed trying new things. Perhaps Dragon Beard Noodles? Maybe he would get a chuckle out of that.

A warmth filled your heart upon stepping into the kitchen. There at the sink washing the dishes was him, your husband. Prancing forward, you wrapped your arms around him from behind. He laughed, though didn’t bother to stop with his cleaning.

“You’re up earlier than usual.”

You mumbled into the back of his shirt, breathing in his calming scent. You didn’t want to remain for too long in fear his warmth would lull you back to sleep, but it seemed pulling away would take more effort than you were willing to expel. After a minute or so, you heard the faucet stop, then a bit of rustling, before he twisted around and wrapped you in his arms. There was a kiss at the top of your head.

“Eat breakfast before you fall asleep again, First,” rumbled his low voice in your ear.

You gave a long sigh, then pulled back. But before you could get too far, you stood on the tips of your toes and kissed his cheek.

“Thank you, Dvalin.”

[delusionaid]

drabble for @iniziare 🧡 | 🎶

The night-flame lantern - a revered object among believers, rumored to hold great magic: the power to reach lost souls in the netherworld and gather their pieces to guide them back towards the land of the living. Any soul not shattered by grief that holds a spark of desire to return to its former state can be called to the light as long as the one guarding it does not waver in their wish to be reunited and ensures its flame to burn for three days without break.

A mortal tale, nothing more. A sadness clings to the object, a silent history of shattered hopes accumulated by a long line of desperate men attempting to defy fate. Naturally, no artifact so powerful would fall so carelessly into the hands of mortals and stay hidden for so long if it held the power it promised. Yet the essence of something old and forgotten radiates from it undeniably - a god or adeptus may have had a hand in creating it or bestowing magic upon it.

Even so, it would not be powerful enough to draw back a soul as strong as Guizhong's.

It's a sweet dream that keeps nothing alive but the last slither of hope any grieving man holds on to for dear life, just long enough for him to keep himself afloat and not succumb to grief. And yet his hands show a light tremor as he places it on the ground and lights it, watches its flame flicker for a few tense seconds and then go still. He stays tense as he watches the glow inside the lantern, the delicate drawing of a lotus flower on the paper screen, once golden and magnificent, now yellowed and faded. It seems to come to life before his eyes, its petals dancing in an imaginary breeze.

Three days he sits and watches, never taking his eyes off the light. It's a warm and soothing presence, like her promise of visiting soon when he seeks seclusion in the mountains. He almost feels her coming, thinks to hear the sound of footsteps drawing near - bare feet on soft grass - hears the wind rustle her sleeves and the jingle of little trinkets that she carries.

Five days pass before the light goes out, the flame dying faster than he can move to save it. It burns bright one moment and is gone the next, leaving behind nothing but smoke and darkness. The essence he sensed fades like the remainder of a scent, lost to history for good, and with it the feeling of her. And the hope.

Nobody will come find him in his seclusion, no promise of a visit create that yearning in his heart to go back to them and not forget himself as centuries go by, letting seasons come and go without admiring the beauty of their flowers and the sweetness of their fruit. How naive to place one's hope in such a fickle artifact against all odds. Maybe some fragment of her was here for a brief time, but of course she would not return. Not now and not for a long time - perhaps not as long as time flows in this direction. He shouldn't have trusted in this for even a minute, but something compelled him this time - and he regrets it. For the grief he spared himself from, if only in part and only with heavy skepticism, comes rushing down on him now, accumulated, and it weighs heavier than before.

All he got in exchange for his hope is proof that she, indeed, is gone, and no word of him can reach her.

[dollhouseirl]

And with that, it's done. I present my first finished VN, Purple Prose for Purple Hearts: **** the Witch. **** is ambiguous; it does not mean to fuck her but I guess that's a thing you could do, were I a more skillful programmer. It could be to stop or harm her. That is certainly a thing that is done more than enough times. Ultimately, Lucia is a witch and something has to be done with her.

Alas, this was my first time working with Ren'py so, in the end, mostly all you've in you is to talk with and listen to the witch.

I'm very proud of myself for getting this done and had far more fun with it than I expected. This was for the Menhera Jam on itch.io and it was a fabulous community with many other fabulous submissions I will be sure to share on here as I read them which I WILL. DO.

Above all that though I am proud of my team: @norbezjones, @lotus-start, mellowbile and Clover all did fabulous design work and spriting! @loveinfirmary put in some real man hours on an incredible CG I'm still pretty astonished by! Even in this stage I am tweaking music some but there are tracks by Ms. mellowbile and Astar aside from all the royalty free stuff I have used for this project. The GUI was a contribution by swanchime, an incredible creative talent. Really, my whole team and everyone in the jam was incredible.

All I did was write it to life the best I could, make backgrounds with photos I had on hand and could manipulate, and code it with my rudimentary beginner's skillset. This ultimately is a dream I've gotten to have with beautiful new friends, I hope, that I wish to share with anyone interested in reading it.

If you, like Lucia and I, have bipolar 1, I wrote this almost more for people like you than anyone because, in many ways, I wrote it for myself and about my menhera. I wrote to take ownership of it and I wrote to own my ability to write a lot of ideas that I will ALSO be talking more about in this space.

If anyone has any questions about this work, if it is unclear in places or there are just things you want to know, I would be happy to answer any time ^^ There is at least one thing in this VN I made obscure but not a secret. Perhaps you'll sense what it is~

That's that. I've said too much. I hope everyone who picks this up enjoys it as much as I enjoyed making it!

[honeybeezgobzzzzz]

𓅨 As Dawn Breaks: Chapter Thirteen

As Dawn Breaks: Mother Night and Father Time, after having sired seven Endless to personify life in the known universe, create Earth and human life begins. One last Endless is created: Dawn, the personification of illumination and hope, the beginning of a new day and a chance for happiness and improvement. A love will span thousands of millennia, breaking with every sunrise and renewing hope come sunset. Yet, even the personification of hope can lose the very notion of her existence from the sting of a broken heart.

Warnings: More Angst (Because Why Not?).

To Note: Dream/Morpheus x Endless!FemaleReader(Dawn), This Involves Themes That Are Not For Everyone.

Word Count: ~2.0k

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Life continued on in eternal peace… at the very least that was the image you portrayed. It was only in the darkest of night, right before the sun kissed the horizon of your realm, that your people saw your true being. With every dawn came agony as your hope once again broke within you. But you were the embodiment of hope itself, and each and every sunset renewed your fragile hope that all of your pain would be healed and Morpheus would come to vanquish your agony. Why did your very purpose of creation have to be the reason you had suffered for eons?

Dawn breaks. Sunset anew.

You found yourself sitting on the edge of a balcony in your castle, staring out at the receding sun and the explosion of warm colors that painted the sky. Any moment now you would feel happy again, hopeful. At times you wished you could just remain sullen and heartbroken the full 24 hours, rather then spend 12 hours a day hoping for something you knew would never happen. Hope could be quite cruel at times.

The sun finally dipped below the horizon and renewing hope and energy filled your body. You shuddered in place, sucking in a deep breath and feeling your entire body melt from hunch and tight, into loose and relaxed. Unfolding yourself from your sitting position, you slipped from your perch and floated through your room, heading in the direction of your private courtyard. There wasn’t much for you to do this time of the years, the cherry blossoms were blooming and your people were collecting the soft petals to make soaps, oils, and perfumes. That wasn’t in your skill set so you happily left that job to your people.

Entering the courtyard, your eyes immediately went to the pond in the heart of the courtyard, lily pads and lotus roots growing throughout the pond. Contrary to its name, your lotus pond only held one lotus flower, a large blooming lotus that never faded and never wilted. Perhaps it only added to your grief, but you had felt the need to plant the lotus in remembrance of the child you had lost. Kneeling down at the edge of the pond, you reached forwards and brushed your fingers over the lily pads, clearing them of cherry blossoms petals that had blown into the courtyard from the lack of roof. A few of the vines rose from the water and offered you petals that had floated near the center of the pond.

“Thank you, little ones.” You spoke softly, gathering the offered petals in your hand and placing them to the ground beside you. You started humming softly, carrying on your usual day by neatening up your courtyard and letting the plants play with your fingers. You were in the middle of untangling two vines that had gotten overzealous with their competition for your attention when you felt the brush of Death.

Dawn, I know you wish to be left alone, but I beg you little one, please allow me to visit. I am worried about you.

You wanted to refuse. Vehemently. But for Death of the Endless to beg? That was unheard of and should never have to occur, not for such a powerful being as she. You took a deep breath and slowly let it out. There was no more running away from this conversation.

My gates are open to you.

You could feel the relief coming from the older Endless and then the slight tremble throughout your realm as Death entered your gates. Looking up, your eyes met those of your dove, and she cooed at you before taking to the air. She would guide Death to your private courtyard. Looking back at the lotus plants in front of you, you leaned back on your knees. When you explained everything to Death, because she surely would not leave until she was satisfied that you had told her everything, would she tell the others?

You felt that she wouldn’t, but you had been alone for billions of years now, you didn’t really know what to expect from the other Endless anymore. Well, you knew what to expect from Dream, and Desire was always predictable, but the others were still quite mysterious. Your dove cooed, her call echoing through the halls of the castle. Death’s essence was close, calling out to you after eons of lacking. She radiated soothing and comforting energy, warmth that you had greatly missed. There was a flutter of wings behind you and your dove swopped over your shoulder and landed by your right knee. You looked at her and she cocked her head, looking up at you proudly. Smiling, you brushed a finger over her speckled head before rising to your feet.

“Welcome to The Garden,” You greeted, slowly turning around to face Death as your dove fluttered to your shoulder. Death looked exactly as you remember from the glimpse you got of her at the family dinner. For a moment, all that Death did was stare at you. No, not stare, she was assessing you. Trying to see how broken you were. Trying to figure out what you had been hiding all of these eons past.

“Dawn, it is good to see you,” Death replied, her face taking on a gentle look. “It is a shame that you couldn’t stay for the family dinner, you haven’t been to one in eons.” You took another deep breath and slowly released it, your eyes flickering to the plants around you.

“Yes, well, I certainly wasn’t lying when I said that I was much too busy for such frivolous activities.” Death raised her eyebrow and snorted.

“It’s not frivolous to visit family, say hello,” She countered, knowing that, perhaps, you had been using that as an excuse to avoid a certain Endless. “We do miss you, all of us.” You let out an exaggerated snort of disgust.

“Oh I doubt that, Death, I doubt that indeed.” You stated blandly. “I was not created to be ignorant.” Death knew what you spoke of, knew who you spoke of. How could Dream have caused such a rift between himself and you that you had sequestered yourself behind your gates for Eons, refusing to come out? You had been carrying Dream’s child when you had broken all contact, surely you didn’t plan on hiding yourself and the ninth Endless away for all eternity…

“Dawn, you aren’t just punishing Dream by staying away,” Death started, trying to break through the solid wall you had placed between your essence and the seven others. “Surely your child deserves to meet—“ Death cut off the moment she saw your eyes blaze with your absolute power. She hadn’t ever seen you like this, so inhospitable, so angry. But you weren’t just angry, you were also filled with agony and despair. Death was puzzled.

“There is no child of Dream and Dawn of the Endless for you to meet, Death.” You replied, your voice dropping to a painfully soft whisper. It took a few moments for Death to register your words, when she realized what you meant, her confusion only grew.

“But— Dawn, I would have had to come collect your child if they died, and I have yet to do so…” You scoffed.

“That’s because I lost it before it even had the chance to bloom life,” You told her, your animosity clear in your tone. “I’ve had to live with losing all that I had left from what Dream clearly has labeled as a gross mistake.” If Death had a physical heart, it would be breaking right now. You hadn’t even had the chance to birth your child? You had lost everything you had loved in such a short period of time in such a cruel way, alone… it was no wonder you had shut yourself away for so long.

“Oh Dawn,” Death breathed out, now fully understanding what you were feeling behind your facade of a perfectly happy Endless. “Have you told anyone? Any of the others? Does Dream know?” No, of course he didn’t know! He wouldn’t still be stewing and muttering about you and your supposed child living happy and carefree without him and the other Endless… “Why haven’t you said anything to us? To him?”

“He has no right to that knowledge unless he should ask, and we both know he won’t.” You spat out, anger replacing the melancholy that had appeared in your features. “It’s like Dream said, I was just a mistake and a broken rule… why should I be allowed to keep a child made from something so twisted?” Your words flew from your mouth like they were poison and Death knew that you hadn’t just been agonizing over your would be child, but letting the hurt from Dream’s cruel words fester beneath your skin.

“You were not a mistake and neither are you a broken rule, Dawn,” Death tried to reassure you, you only softly chuckled and shook your head.

“Oh he made that quite clear, Death, what was it he called me? Ah, yes, a ‘plot twist’ and a ‘story that must come to an end’.” Bitterness was soaked into your voice like it had taken residence within you eons ago. No doubt it had, you’d been alone for so long, bearing the pain and agony of losing not just the being you loved but the child you had created with him. How did you manage to still look so radiant and hopeful? Death took your hand, and you let her, silently appreciating the touch of her essence. “Why did they make me like this? Why did they make me so twisted and disgusting?” Death pulled you around to look you in the eyes, her dark brown ones full of wisdom and age.

“Dawn of the Endless, Mother Night and Father Time made no mistake when they sculpted you from stardust and nebulas. You are exactly as they intended.” She firmly but gently, told you. Death was entirely serious with her worlds. Mother Night and Father Time might have made all of the Endless, but your creation was not to expand the current Endless family. No, you were Endless, but you were not their sibling. You were not Dream’s sibling. “You are an Endless, yes, but you are right, you always have been. You weren’t made to be our sibling, you were made to bring hope and strength to mortals. What is life without hope? Nothing, that’s my answer. Life is nothing without hope. We Endless are nothing without hope, without you. If Dream can’t see that then he is so self centered he could rival Desire and he does not deserve your love, Dawn.”

You knew her words to be true, but the hollowness you felt deep within your essence still radiated your pain, your agony, at what Dream had told you. Not even your very make, hope itself, could prevent that. You dropped your eyes to the ankh hanging around Death’s neck. You would eventually be free of the pain, but that was still head of you by an eternity.

“Do you know what the worst part of this is, Death?” You asked, your eyes lifting to hers once more. Death pursed her lips, knowing that what you were going to say was not going to feel good on her heart. “Each and every sunset my hope renews, I can’t help but hope that he will come back to me and tell me how wrong he was, tell me that what we had wasn’t twisted, or a fantasy, or a mistake. But come dawn, when the sky is darkest? I break all over again and feel the agony of my loss just as fresh as it was when I could feel that little life, the one we made together, slowly slipping from my body. I relive that pain each and every day, and will until it is my time to go. I may have been naive then, but at least I am not cruel, not like him.”

Date Published: 2/27/23

Last Edit: 2/27/23

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[remma3760]

Chapter 4

Summary:

Where does Wei Ying belong? Should he stay with the Lans, or should they let the Jiangs have him back?

"So you think he would want this? It would be good for him?" Lan Qiren was anxious. The Elders had approved his request, but he was unsure on how to approach Wei Ying, so had come to Lan Huizhong for advice. 

"I do. He needs to feel safe. That he won't be discarded for the slightest mistake, and the onus of that is going to fall on you, Qiren. But you won't be alone in this. We have all become very fond of little A-Ying."

Lan Qiren smiled. Yes, the boy was certainly endearing. He had never thought he could feel such fondness for a child of Cangse Sanren. But, here they were. Less than two months and already Wei Ying had made such a difference in all their lives. "How are his sessions coming on, Huizhong?"

"Qiren, you know I can't talk about them. When Wei Ying is ready to share with you, he will. Although, I am considering additional sessions involving all of you."

"All of us?"

"Yes. You know I've been including A-Zhan already, and I feel that that has helped both of them, so in time, perhaps you and Xichen could be there too."

"I have noticed that A-Zhan seems more at ease. He smiles now, Huizhong. I had given up all hope of seeing that again. Was he really so traumatised by what happened at Lotus Pier?"

"His faith in the infallibility of adults was severely shaken, but honestly, he should probably have been seeing me since his mother died."

Shocked, Lan Qiren stared at his friend. "But he got over that. He stopped sitting outside her door every month and went back to being the well behaved boy he was before."

"The well behaved boy who never smiled and rarely spoke."

Dropping his head into his hands, Lan Qiren sighed. "I missed so much, Huizhong. I was never meant to be a Sect Leader or a parent, yet now I have to be both. All I wanted was to study and teach."

"Do you regret it?"

"No. Not for a moment. They're my boys and I would die to protect them. They make me a better man. Did you know that A-Zhan stood up to Madam Yu because he thought that that's what I would have done had I been there?"

"Isn't it?"

"I don't know. I would hope so. Even so, A-Zhan's trust in me is humbling. I only hope I can live up to it."

"Yes. The faith of a child is absolute and terrifying. And now you're taking on a third."

Lan Qiren huffed. "Am I mad, Huizhong? What was I thinking?"

"You were thinking that there was an innocent child who needed your love and protection. You're a good man. Qiren. Never think otherwise. Raising a child is the hardest job any of us will ever undertake. You're doing well, my friend. And you are free to come to me anytime you have doubts or uncertainties. I will always listen."

Lan Qiren smiled and sighed, giving his friend's shoulder a squeeze as he left to find his children.

***

"Why is Mother so angry, Yanli?"

"I expect she's missing A-Ying."

"No she's not. Why would she, she has us, and he was always being bad anyway and she hated him. I expect she's happy he's gone."

"Don't say that A-Cheng. Mother doesn't hate him. She cares about him deep down, she just wants to help him be better so she has to punish him sometimes. It's for his own good. Don't you miss him too?"

"No! I'm glad he's gone. He made Mother and Father fight and Mother was always angry because of him. Mother is still being angry because of him. I wish he'd never come here."

"You don't meant that A-Cheng. Think how much fun you had playing together."

"I had fun with my dogs but Father took them away because of him. Oh, do you think I can have them back now that he's gone?"

"He isn't gone. He's just visiting Cloud Recesses for awhile. Father means to bring him home soon, and Mother agrees. I heard them talking, and Father said the Lans were being difficult so Mother told him he had to be more forceful or she would take things into her own hands and go and get him herself. So you see, Mother does want him back and she must care for him."

"But if he's bad again, she'll get angry."

"Yes, but if he's here she can guide him to be better. Teach him to be good. This is his home. Father has been helping me write to him so he will want to come back. Maybe you could write, too, or we could send him a present. He must miss us both terribly. You know he loves us."

"I suppose. I could send him the frog I found!"

"Well, maybe not the frog."

"Can I send a bug?"

"A-Cheng, I really think it would be better not to send anything alive. Maybe a picture?"

"Drawing is boring."

"A-Cheng."

"What about the funny rock I found? that's not alive. can I send that?"

"Yes. That sounds good. I'm sure A-Ying will love it. You go get it and I'll ask Father to put it in with the newest letter."

Running off happily, Jiang Cheng went to retrieve his rock, while Jiang Yanli went to get her Father's help with a new letter.

***

Standing in the doorway, Lan Qiren quietly observed his family. Xichen sat at his small desk, finishing his lesson, while the little ones played by his feet. Some new game where his shoe had somehow transformed into a rampaging beast and was menacing his spare socks and a teacup.

Taking a deep breath he entered and closed the door behind him, drawing their attention. A-Ying jumped up immediately, running over and grabbing his hand to draw him into the game. A moment later A-Zhan joined them, tentatively taking Lan Qiren's other hand. This was a new developement as before A-Zhan had been reluctant to engage physically, but now that seemed to be changing. He knew how happy that made Xichen as he was now able to hug his little brother without feeling him turn into a block of stone. In truth, it pleased Lan Qiren too, although he had never before realised that this was something he wanted. 

Giving the small hands a squeeze, he settled himself down with the boys by his side, beckoning that Xichen should join them. 

"Boys, there is something I need to talk to you about."

"What is it, Shufu. Is something wrong?" 

"No Xichen. Nothing wrong. In fact, this is something good. At least, I think so, and hope you will to."

Xichen was confused. It wasn't like his uncle to ramble like this. He was usually so direct, but he said it was a good thing so he wasn't worried. Shufu never lied. 

Taking a deep breath, lan Qiren looked at Wei Ying. "A-Ying, are you happy here?"

Wei Ying started. "Yes, Lan Xiansheng. I'm so happy. Everyone has been so kind to me and I have my own bed and my own comb now. I know so many rules and I follow all of them, don't I Lan Zhan?"

Lan Zhan nodded and hummed. Then, in case his uncle didn'tfullu comprehend added, "Wei Ying is good."

Patting both boys on the head, Lan Qiren nodded. "I know. I know Wei Ying is good. But A-Ying, even if you do sometimes break a rule, it's okay. As long as you try your best, that's enough."

Getting agitated, Wey Ying shook his head in denial,"no, no, A-Ying is good. A-Ying will follow all the rules, always."

Holding his now shaking hand, Lan Qiren soothed him. "I know you will always do your best, but even if you do accidentally break a rule I need you to know that I will understand. Even A-Zhan has broken a rule."

Amazed, Wei Ying stared open mouthed at Lan Zhan who nodded sadly. Lan Zhan had broked a rule? But Lan Zhan was perfect! How could that be? Wide eyed, he looked back to Lan Qiren. 

"So you see, A-Ying, all I ask of you is that you always try to be the good, kind boy I know you are. Do you understand?"

Wei Ying wasn't sure he did. He could make mistakes? He could break a rule and not be thrown away? His mind was reeling. 

Lan Qiren gave his hand a little tug, getting his attention back. "That doen't mean you can run riot, A-Ying. You still should try to be good and follow the rules. Simply that you are young and still learning. Don't be afraid. I promise, if you fall, I will pick you up."

Wei Ying's smile was blinding. He hugged Lan Qiren's leg, bouncing happily. Patting him again, Lan Qiren continued. "Well then. A-Ying, since you want to be here, and we want you to be here, I would like, with your consent, to adopt you."

Silence. Nothing but blank looks. Had he been wrong? Was this a mistake. Then Xichen gave a happy squeal. "A-Ying, you would be my little cousin, my Tangdi! You could call me Tangge. If you wanted. Do you want to? A-Ying? Do you?"

"Your cousin? I could call you Tangge? Really. What about Lan Zhan? What would I call Lan Zhan? Could I still call him Lan Zhan? I like calling him Lan Zhan. I like just saying Lan Zhan. And Lan Xiansheng. what would I call Lan Xiansheng? Will I be a Lan? Lan Ying? I won't be Wei Ying anymore?" He was so confused. What did all this mean? 

Pulling the boy into his lap, Lan Qiren huffed a laugh. "A-Ying, it's alright. Wei Ying can still be Wei Ying. The choice is yours. Cangse Sanren and Wei Changze will still be your parents. Only that, since they can't be here, I will be with you in their place. I will make sure you get enough to eat, have a bed to sleep in, that you clean your teeth and brush your hair. You will have a ribbon, like Xichen and A-Zhan, and we will be family. You will grow up here, alongside A-Zhan and when you are old enough, you will get a sword and be a disciple. You can call Xichen and A-Zhan whatever they wish you to call them, and they will call you whatever you wish to be called. As for me, I know you called your father Baba, so perhaps you could call me Die or Fuqin?"

"A-Die?"

Chest tight, Lan Qiren Nodded. "I would like that very much A-Ying."

"Can I still be Wei Ying?"

"Of course. Your parents were good people, and deserve to be remembered. I have already spoken with a craftman. He is making tablets for them both. They weren't Lan, so I'm sorry, but they can't be kept in the Ancestral Hall, but we can build a shrine for them so you can visit with them, and honour them. You can even choose where you want the shrine to be if you wish."

Overwhelmed, Wei Ying burst into tears, clinging desperately to Lan Qiren and pulling Lan Zhan and Lan Xichen in close. Lan Qiren hugged them all. His family.

***

She watched the white clad cultivators as they wandered through the market. They were young, and hadn't yet learned discretion. They weren't shouting but she could easily hear them as she followed at a safe distance. 

"No, it's true. Lan Xiansheng is definitely adopting Wei Ying. A-Niang told me. There's going to be a ribbon ceremony and everything."

"The Elders agreed?"

"They did. A-Niang siad that at first, they were worried about fallout from the Jiang, but Lan Xiansheng convinced them."

"I still can't believe that our little master stood up to Madam Yu. That woman is terrifying."

"He probably didn't really do it. The stories have to be exaggerated. He's seven. She was probably just telling the Wei boy off and Lan Zhan interfered so it became this whole big thing."

"Are you crazy? Wei Ying was in the infirmary for weeks. You think what, he was so devestated at being scolded that he had a mental breakdown that needed weeks of recovery? Come on. A-Niang said that she heard Daifu say that Lan Zhan saved Wei Ying's life. His life."

"Wow. Lan Zhan always seems so quiet and reserved. Who would have thought he had such courage?"

"Well, they say it's always the quiet ones. And just think, if he's willing to stand up to Madam Yu for a complete stranger, what wouldn't he do for us, his sect brothers?"

Nidding in agreement, the disciples moved off. She watched them go. So, the rumours she had heard were true. Maybe it was time to pay a visit to Cloud Recesses. 

[okinawa-division]

Rashaad's Thoughts on Arakawa Division

Alexis Ward

"Oh, another American, much like Master Ace, Miss Rose, and Kyler-san. It seems she knows them all, probably from their time in America. She seems like a nice, yet stern woman with a chip on her shoulders. I've noticed she carries around a camera sometimes. Perhaps for filming or taking pictures. A shame she doesn't make that a full-time career. It seems her current job, whatever it is, is giving her a lot of stress. I hope she doesn't let it affect her too much."

Hoàng Diệu

"I may, or may not, have met Miss Diệu back when I was tutoring under Master Jelani. She hasn't changed a bit since the last I saw her. One thing that has changed is that she now seems to work under jewelry design. Her lotus-inspired jewelry seems to be quite popular with much of the female populace. It's a shame she chooses to make her living doing... whatever it is that she does now. If she switched from that to jewelry design, I'm sure she'd have less people upset at her."

Ivelisse Martinez

As Rashaad looks at the photo of the Puerto Rican yoga instructor, his eyes grow wide and his mouth opens as he looks at the photo. It is quite obvious he knows who this woman is, and he cannot believe that she is here, or how much she has changed.

"No... Ivelisse... what are you doing here?"

As he stares at the photo, memories of his past and his time as a teenager come flooding back. He closes his eyes tight and clenches his teeth. He sighs heavily and covers his face with both hands, letting the photo slide onto the counter as he tries to wrestle with his emotions. His memories, which he fought hard to keep hidden and forgotten have now come rushing full-force into the forefront of his mind.

Sounds of Silence

Rashaad is sitting in an empty booth, his legs propped up on the table. In one hand, he is holding a still lit cigarette, and in the other, he is holding onto a half-full cop of whiskey. He sighs and takes a swig of his liquor, finishing it in one gulp. He sighs once more, rubbing his forehead.

"...Suffice to say, I'm having trouble putting into words just how I feel about this team. While I have no problems with them personally, I really do not wish to battle against them. If we (Liberty Guild) do, then... well, I don't think I can face them. This has more to do with Ivelisse than the team as a whole. But anyway... yeah, I-I-I can't do it... I'm sorry."

He sighs, giving his cigarette one last smoke, before swinging his legs around and walking out of view. Left on the table is a photo of the yoga instructor with the words, 'sister' along with 'I'm sorry' is written on top of it in black ink.

[arakawa-division]

ARB Birthday Special 2024: Hoàng Diệu

~~ July 8th ~~

"Sometimes a perceived obstacle is just an opportunity in disguise."

Login Lines:

"Thank you much for your patronage! Please come back again soon!" *Sighs* "Another productive day at Lotus Bloom Jewelry, each piece a fragment of my soul on display. ...Oh, another customer? Welcome, how can I help? Oh, you're not here for a request? Then what is it?"

"What's this? A... birthday card? ...Ah, today is my birthday? How could I forget? And what's this? ...A request for a date? Haha~ how cute. ♡ Sorry Tiger, you're adorable, but I'm afraid I'm quite busy. Maybe next time. But thanks for the card, nonetheless."

Voice Lines:

"Arakawa has been more lively than usual today. A stream of well-wishers and hopeful suitors have come through Lotus Bloom, each leaving their mark—a birthday wish, a shy invitation. It's almost routine now, the way they look at me with anticipation. I'm accustomed to it, the attention, the offers." *Sighs* "If only time were a gem I could shape and polish at will, perhaps I'd indulge in the luxury of a 'yes.'"

"I received a call from 'Auntie' today. She wished me, in her little, special way, a 'happy birthday'. She's never truly been the 'touchy, feely, emotional kind-of person'. But still, to know she took time out to wish me a 'happy birthday' still means something. She even sent money to buy whatever I want. It was nice, but... I think she forgot I've got multiple accounts with more than enough money in them. Still, it's the thought that counts, as they say."

"31 years… The lotus blooms anew, each petal a year of triumphs and trials. The shop is quiet now, the day’s end near. I lock the door, the click echoing like a toast to the year ahead. To freedom, to the dance of shadows, to the art that is my life and my legacy."

"Alexis, so nice to see you this fine day. ...Ugh, are you still upset about that? I apologized. I'd no idea those photos were important for your project. Really, it was a mistake on my part, and I'll... try to make sure it doesn't happen again. But no promises. Oh, nothing. Please ignore me."

"So, was there a reason for you coming here? ...Oh, a birthday gift from you? How shocking. ...A personalized planner? It even has my name on it! Thank you so much for this, Alexis. This was very thoughtful. ...Of course, dear. Of course."

"Ivy, dear. Thank you very much for the birthday wish. ...I know I promised to join you for yoga. And you know me, I'm not one for breaking promises. However, work and... other things have been keeping me busy. I'll try to make your next one, but no promises, dear. ...Thank you for being understanding."

"What is this now? ...Oh, meditation beads? Hmm... some of these look like some of the gemstones from my store. Wait... is that what you wanted those stones for the other day, Ivy dear? ...How... beautiful. I didn't know that you were skilled at this sort of thing, my dear. Thank you for this, truly. I'll be sure to wear them the next chance I get. Thank you again, dear."

Alexis Lines:

"Happy Birthday, Diệu. ...Yes, I’m here, though really, I should be getting to work on replacing those photos you deleted. Yes, I’m still annoyed about those photos! Do you have any idea how much trouble you caused? Those were for a client! Now I have to take time off to re-take them! ...I heard that, Diệu. Normally, I'd hurt you for this, but since it's your day, I'll save it for later. For now, let's just let’s focus on today."

"Here's your gift: a custom planner. It's got everything you need to keep track of your… activities. Just promise me you won't use it for anything mischievous. I can see that smirk, Diệu. You’re not fooling anyone. But it's your day, so I'll let it slide. Just try to keep it professional, alright?"

Ivelisse's Lines:

"Diệu-san, Happy Birthday. It is good to see you. You were missed at my last yoga class. ...I know how the currents of life can sweep us away from our intentions, so I don't bear you any ill will. ...No need for promises, just flow with the tide when you can."

"...These beads, yes, they are from your collection. I wanted to give you something that resonates with your spirit. Each stone is selected with care, imbued with a wish for tranquility and balance in your whirlwind life. ...I'm glad they've found a place in your heart. Wear them in health, wear them in silence, or in the midst of your dance. They are a reminder of the peace that's always within reach, even when the world outside is anything but silent."

[cilil]

Author's Note: Thanks @edensrose for requesting this one!♡

This is the last entry for the spicy bingo that I still had to write. Apologies for the delay, other events and health issues kept interfering with my schedule.

ೃ♡⁀➷ Spicy Bingo: Frottage + Navëmóre ৎ୭

He can't remember the last time he was this excited, if ever before. Yet how is he supposed to stay focused on his work when he finds beautiful, gorgeous Vanimóre bathing in the lotus pools of Mandos, showing off his naked fána so shamelessly, knowing full well he can't tear his gaze away from him?

ৎ୭ Synopsis: Looking for his colleague doesn't go as Navëquen expected

ৎ୭ Featuring: Frottage (shocking I know), handjob, more or less clothed

ৎ୭ Oneshot (~ 900 words)

OC info: Navëquen Vanimóre

Their lips meet in a heated kiss, devouring each other until fangs pierce skin and they withdraw slightly to catch their breath. Navëquen barely has time to gasp before Vanimóre leans in again and licks the tiny wound before his tongue pushes itself between parted lips to explore his mouth. 

He can't remember the last time he was this excited, if ever before. Yet how is he supposed to stay focused on his work when he finds beautiful, gorgeous Vanimóre bathing in the lotus pools of Mandos, showing off his naked fána so shamelessly, knowing full well he can't tear his gaze away from him? When he is now kissing him so shamelessly and fervently, his fána barely covered by thin silken robes? 

Navëquen moans against his lips, causing Vanimóre to withdraw once more and let out a light chuckle.

"Well, creeps? Is this what you wanted?" he taunts, an impish expression on his face, fangs on display. 

Smug as always, Navëquen thinks, but there's no anger or malice behind it. His desire for the beautiful Maia in front of him eclipses everything else he may have felt in this moment, and he feels his fána reacting as well; yet even so, he hesitates, unsure if any further advances on his part are welcome. 

Vanimóre senses his indecisiveness. "Or would you perhaps like to play some more?" he asks suggestively.

His eyes are half-lidded and his breathing is heavy. Before Navëquen can wonder whether he should interpret this as an invitation to continue, he feels Vanimóre's hand on his thigh, slowly trailing upwards until his fingers brush against his growing erection, stroking him through the fabric of his breeches. 

"Ahn–! Vani–" 

He can't help it anymore, can't resist when the Maia he has loved in secret for ages tempts him so brazenly. Letting his instincts take over, Navëquen flips him around and pushes him against the nearest wall. Vanimóre manages to brace himself against it with both hands, only to be caught off-guard by two arms around his waist and a hand slipping underneath his robes to wrap around his cock. 

Navëquen is pleased to discover that his arrogant colleague seems to have enjoyed their kisses as well and starts pleasuring him without further delay. Vanimóre's previous question still remains unanswered, yet he feels like words are no longer needed–their fánar have long since betrayed them, displaying their lust for one another. 

Without thinking, he starts rutting against his counterpart in an attempt to relieve his own need. It feels so good, holding Vanimóre in his arms, touching him, inhaling his scent, hearing the song of his fëa–even better than in his dreams or anything he could have imagined. As much as Navëquen wishes there was no fabric separating their fánar, it creates a pleasant kind of friction that he hopes will be enough to satisfy him; whether he'll be taken care of in return, he is too shy to ask. 

"Getting–mmh–desperate, creeps?" Vanimóre taunts him again, though it's evident that he's suppressing a moan as he speaks. 

Navëquen slows down his movements on purpose, brushing against the tip of his cock with his thumb. 

"Don't bite the hand that feeds you, doll," he admonishes, "or touches you, in this case."

Despite his uncertainty in matters of intimacy, he won't let Vanimóre get away with such antics. He rolls his hips forward to  let him feel his hardness and increase friction, allowing soft groans to escape his lips. 

"Please..." Vanimóre breathes. His ear twitches and a shudder of pleasure goes through him; he seems to be giving in. 

"Please what, doll?" 

"Don't... tease me–ngh–touch me... please..." 

"Fine then." 

Navëquen smiles and gently bites his ear, eliciting another beautiful, desperate moan. Never did he think he would have Vanimóre begging for his touch, and he begins to realise just how much he loves this, enjoys taking control and asserting dominance over this smug Maia. 

He resumes his task, stroking Vanimóre with renewed vigour and persistence while he continues to rut against him. Everything else is forgotten, gone from his mind, and all that remains are soft sounds of pleasure, his fingers wrapped around a hot, hard cock and the ever increasing heat in his own lower body. 

It doesn't take long until Navëquen feels warm liquid spilling all over his hand and Vanimóre's fána tensing and quivering from his climax. He tries to hold back, to avoid embarrassing himself any further than he already has by grinding on his colleague like a beast in heat, but it's too late; watching and listening to Vanimóre finding his release in his arms, from his touch no less, has pushed him over the edge, and he soon feels a wet, sticky sensation between his legs. 

"Well?" 

Vanimóre recovers quickly and turns around, giving him an expectant look.

Navëquen isn't sure what he wants. Has he noticed that he came as well? Is he about to point it out and comment on the state of his robes? Is there anything he's expected to do that he isn't aware of? 

"I... have to get back to work," he says quietly, cheeks flushing bright red. Certainly not the most eloquent thing he could have come up with, but the first thing that came to mind. 

Vanimóre opens his mouth as if to protest, but Navëquen quickly disappears in a flash of green, teleporting back to his room with no intention of coming out any time soon. 

If you enjoyed, please consider liking and reblogging!♡

taglist: @edensrose @i-did-not-mean-to

spicy bingo master post | my masterlist | tag list form

[aurora-ze-aquarius]

Something I thought about while cleaning up. So we all know Kingdom is introducing the dragons into the game through Odyssey-esque chapters. That makes me wonder, will the other ancients go in search for the other dragons in their own chapters?

We all know Pitaya and Hollyberry were obviously going to get their own story arc after the reveal of their petty/friendly rivalry, but I'm curious as to if the other ancients are going to play a part in the other dragon stories.

I came up with this one on the spot.

Though, bare in mind I am not familiar with Ovenbreak (and have no desire to play it, so unfortunately my knowledge of the dragons are limited to the wiki entries.)

(btw, this post might be a long, unhinged rambling of mine, buckle up.)

Here's my hypothetical dragon chapter ft. Lotus Dragon and The Dark Cacao Cookies.

Edit: Apparently, Lotus dragon is more so a backdrop in this rambling. H mm. I did not foresee that.

This chapter will focus on Lotus Dragon Cookie, mainly because I really like their aesthetic, also because I think wish granting seems like it could be a great story to tell, especially with Dark Choco and Dark Cacao.

Speaking of which, I believe this chapter would benefit well if we sorta switched perspectives from Cacao to Choco every once in a while. Idk, somewhat like oddessy, except without Gingerbrave.

So anyway-

We begin our story with Dark Cacao and Crunchy Chip travelling to the lands where Lotus Dragon resides, hoping to find an allyship with them. Pitaya Dragon (now allies with them thanks to Hollyberry) informed the other ancients about the other dragons, and so have agreed to split up in search for them.

The two of them then stumble upon a collector/hunter cookie (i haven't decided), who was also in search for the Lotus Dragon to ask for a wish, and so the three of them decided to travel together. However, both Crunchy and Cacao seem pretty suspicious towards the cookie.

I don't know if the cookie will be a twist villain or not, but basically, they're not trusting them just yet. (Let's call them Collector Cookie for now)

Then we turn our attention to Dark Choco, who's currently living out his best life when he stumbles across a cookie in danger. He helps them out, and the cookie tells him that they wish to seek out Lotus Cookie (let's call this one Wanderer Cookie.) so Choco decides to go with him, perhaps to make a wish too.

Wanderer Cookie explains he wishes to seek vengeance against someone who hurt him, and Dark Choco (having gone through his character arc) tries to tell them it's not a good idea, leaving Wanderer Cookie to question whether or not they even want revenge or just closure for what happened to them.

By the middle of the story, the two parties accidentally meet up with one another. Wanderer Cookie seems to recognize Collector Cookie and accuses them of being the one who harmed them in the past.

(Like I said, I'm not sure if I want Collector Cookie to be the main "bad guy" of the story or not, but when the two parties meet, Collector and Wanderer do not like each other for whatever reason.)

I don't know where to go from here, but in the end, they save the day from a disaster or something, and they all get to make a wish.

Wanderer Cookie wishes for closure for what happened to them.

Crunchy gets a wish too.

Dark Choco and Dark Cacao? Dark Cacao wishes he could make things right with Dark Choco, and the latter wishes he could do something to right the wrongs he did when he spiraled down that path of bloodshed.

Oh yeah, Lotus is also convinced to join them.

Tldr: if ever Lotus Cookie is introduced, I want the Dark Cacao Kingdom Cookies to find them, and I want Dark Choco and Dark Cacao to be happy again. Why? Because I am very biased towards them.

(also Wanderer Cookie is definitely not a stand in for my oc haha- what are you talking abou—)