#telling her how he felt during s6

[canonicallyobserving911]

Buck & Eddie: Buck had already found "happiness" before he started searching for it!

The shades of baby blue he wore in S6 illustrates it perfectly.

At the beginning of 6A, I noticed several things about Buck’s clothes including his "looking for ANSWERS uniform" (linked here) and all the "ugly" and "ill fitting" clothes (linked here) he wore during the season. But I also noticed the difference in the vibrancy of the shades of baby blue he wore and it perplexed me but I didn't analyze it because of the way Season 6 ended🙄.

However, last week, while I was searching for scenes in S6 that showed him wearing his "looking for ANSWERS uniform" along with some of the "ill fitting clothes" he wore, I remembered the differences in the shades of baby blue he sported throughout the season and after I finally analyzed it, I developed a theory regarding what it meant and his clothes validated it.

At the end of Season 5, Buck wore a vibrant baby blue suit to Hen and Karen's vow renewal ceremony and that color would be the staple for his journey in Season 6. The shades of baby blue he wore throughout the season were very LOUD and they spoke volumes about all the things he wasn't verbally saying. Everyone knows he had a lot of questions about his life including him wanting to be interim captain, his relationships, his search for happiness, him being a sperm donor and him wanting to be a father but the problem was (and still is since he's still looking for the answers) Buck had already found happiness with Eddie and Chris and the vibrant shades of baby blue he wore in 6x1, 6x2 and 6x13 tell the story while the muted shades he wore in 6x7, 6x8, 6x9 and 6x12 illustrated how he was unsure about the decisions he made or was making.

Before I get started, I want to remind everyone about the way Buck spent the majority of the season "not talking" to the people he should have been talking to (his found family) but his clothes represented how the things he wasn't saying were still being said except it wasn't verbal. His clothes told his story or better yet, how he felt about his decisions.

In 6x1, Buck was cooking for his family, Eddie and Chris and while he was, him and Chris were wearing the same color shirts, i.e., blue, gray and white. Buck’s blue shirt was vibrant and it was in between light and dark (reminder the Diaz family color is navy-blue). It's like the show was saying, HEY BUCK, HERE'S YOUR HAPPINESS SITTING RIGHT IN FRONT OF YOU AND THEY HAVE A COUCH WHICH IS YOUR COUCH TOO! But he didn't get it.

He was already HAPPY and he was literally cooking a meal for his husband and son.

But in 6x2, he started his search for happiness after he met Lev at the Happiness Convention and the color baby blue he wore started to get lighter and the more he wore it, the more muted it became.

In 6x7, the universe was SCREAMING at Buck and tried to STOP him from donating but he wouldn't listen and the muted color of his baby blue shirt illustrated it wasn't the right decision for him. Also, that shirt was too little and it was ill fitting.

In 6x8, Buck was proud of himself even though the muted color of his baby blue shirt proved he was unsure about his decision. He went to the Renaissance Fair with Hen and Denny but even though he's good friends with her, it was jarring for him to be there with them when her best friend is Chimney and he could have taken Jee-Yun with them. Reminder, Buck was there shopping for Jee-Yun anyway so Chimney could have gone. Also, IIRC, prior to that episode, Buck had only been shown spending time with Hen and Denny in 3x10 while they were at Eddie’s and he was making gingerbread houses with Chris and Denny.

Buck should have been with Eddie and Chris helping Chris get ready for his first dance. The way it was framed, it seemed like he wasn't where he was supposed to be.

In 6x9, he wore another dull baby blue shirt when he was on a four-way call with Hen, Chimney and Eddie. It was the call when he said he was the official creator of new life but the muted color of his shirt illustrated there's a different narrative. It showed he wasn't sure but he was forcing happiness again by trying to be part of a family (Connor's and Kameron's) when he was already happy several episodes earlier with Eddie and Chris.

In 6x12, Buck wore another dull baby blue shirt when he went to his appointment with Dr. Salazar. After he was struck by lightning, he was unsure about EVERYTHING and he admitted to Eddie that he didn't know what he was feeling when he went home... I mean when he fell asleep on his family's couch... I mean when went to the only place he could rest (Eddie’s).

The last time Buck wore baby blue in season 6 was in 6x13 when he was WITH HIS OWN FAMILY. His shirt was vibrant and bright and he was with Eddie and Chris when he wore it.

Reminder, this is the episode when he looked at Eddie after he said "I'm the guy with the answers, I kind of like it". Eddie and Chris are the answers!

Bonus: more proof Buck was trying to force happiness and his clothes illustrated it perfectly!

In 6x10, he wore a too little outfit when he went to pick up Margaret and Phillip from the airport. His muscles are literally bulging in those ankle beaters. It looks like he was trying to FORCE himself into a family that he doesn't belong in (look at the framing in the second photo to see how Buck’s in the background while all the other Buckleys are in the forefront. It's like he's in the dark about another family secret 👀).

His clothes were also too little in 6x4 when he went to ask Hen about being Connor's sperm donor. They were mismatched and his pants were ankle beaters. His shirt was black with tan trimming but his pants were a wine color and he was wearing his white hightops.

Here's proof that shows Buck did NOT dress like this before season 6. His clothes always fit and they weren't too small or mismatched.

In 4x7, he was dressed like he always did in custom fitted clothes.

In 4x3, his clothes fit perfectly (and so did Eddie’s jeans🤪😜).

In 5x14, he was NOT wearing ankle beaters. His clothes were once again custom fitted and who was he with? His family, Eddie and Chris.

If the show isn't trying to insinuate that Buck, Eddie and Chris are already a FAMILY and that Buck already found HAPPINESS, then the question remains, what is happening with Buck’s clothes?

[gulmoregirls]

Motivated by my own 21st birthday yesteday, I decided to (re)watch the famous episode in S6 in which Rory turns 21.

Looking at it now, I can't help but feel like she was, indeed, so young. I get the entire "rory gilmore downfall" thing and agree that that version of the character was just... off. However, I really feel like they could've made an entire arc about rory losing herself and then finding herself. After all, is what she deserves as one the leads of the show.

Now being her age, I understand better how weird it is to be in your early twenties. Expectations, endless possibilites, the burden of having to actually make the choices for yourself. Rory's in a different environment, questioning the lables that were very prematurely put on her. She's not living the life she had envisioned for herself, turns out she's not good at the one thing she thought she had, all of her friends are doing stuff for themselves - while she, who was always on a pedestal, feels lost.

In a sense, taking Rory from that pedestal was key to her character and to the show. Making her have a identity crisis while entering adulthood and the real world makes absolute sense. It doesn't make her spoiled, or terrible, or mean. It makes her a confused 20yo girl, and speaking as another teenager in my twenties, it does get weird!! I just hate the way everything happened, and how she had little to no insight on it, no meaningful conversations with peers, how under developed it was - to the point that it felt like an individual flaw of rory's character, when it could've been so powerful to a young women audience to have someone relatable get lost but find herself again.

Again, I'm not the show writer, and, as much as I wish Rory had been done better, I can only stick to what is canon while annalizing the episode. So here are my biggest thoughts (as if this text is not long enough)

I feel like there's a reason why they wrote Logan as unaware of Rory's birthday, specially because it plays no role in a fight, or has to do with a lack in their relationship. It's not that Logan forgot, or that he should've known. It's purely that Rory didn't tell him.

In my opinion, it symbolizes what becomes a theme during this part of the show, which is "past rory" vs "current rory" and which one is the "real" one, if it's one of them. Logan not knowing about her birthday equals Emily throwing her a big birthday party with a drink Rory doesn't like but that has her name, or inviting random people she doesn't care about. Equals Logan getting her a Birkin bag, a symbol of power, when she didn't even know the brand existed. The parallel between the dream she used to have with her mother (the trip to vegas, playing 21, buying 21 things) and the reality of their fallout and rory surrounded by exactly what lorelai ran from. Money not being able to buy traditions.

Adding to that, the next episode is the famous one, in which Jess shows up and does more than delivering a passionate speech that, almost twenty years later, would become a tiktok trend. He actually wishes her a late happy birthday. He remembers it. Either intentionally or not, it adds another layer to the amount of parallels rory is facing.

Obviously, Jess knowing something Logan didn't doesn't make him better, nor it changes anything. But in a way, it shows a gap between past and present in a different way (one maybe even more intersting than just comparing "study freak" to "yale dropout", because people change over time), once we're talking about the relationships she's building, and how she wants them to be.

On a side note, I theorize that an explanation could be that Rory and Logan's relationship is very present/future-oriented. "Future" not in the sense of building a future together, a far away future. But "Future" as "the next adventure", "the next challenge", "the next trend". The way his character was introduced already shows that, and it was very important for Rory to let go a little, but I feel like it became easy for her, amidst her twenties-crisis, to live too much like logan, trusting that things would fall into place, relying on priviledges she had never had before, forgetting herself in the process, because actually thinking about the situation would make her spiral.

I guess my point is that talking about Rory's past was not a priority - symbolized about how he doesn't even know her birthday. It worked well for them, as Rory was unconsciously doing it herself, hiding it because remembering meant actually getting in touch with who she used to be, and how things were changing, and questioning everything. Once she was able to taste how living was like for Logan - both because of him and because of her grandparents, that shared similar values and priviledges - it was easy ignoring the past, exactly because it was a big contrast that, maybe, meant that she needed to take a step back and to really think about what version she wanted to be.

(not that it matters, but it almost feels like their talks, ideas and challenges were very logan-coded, once rory was eager to ignore aspects of her life and he was eager to show her the perks and fun of his. on the other hand, her relationship with jess was very rory-coded, because everything in stars hollow brought her memories and stories she wanted to share, whereas jess was the one who wanted to escape himself, always failing to communicate, guard always up, even for small things)

In her party episode, Richard, Emily and Lorelai discuss about Rory, and have different views.

To Emily, they haven't failed her - not until she repeats Lorelai's story, showing up pregnant. Until that, there's still time and efforts. She doesn't care Rory is unhappy, or lost, or confused. She just cares about keeping her under her watch, thinking that, by doing so, she won't become like Lorelai.

To Richard, they have failed her by giving her everything she needed to run away from her responsabilities and her old self. He says something similar to what Jess later tells Rory, about how it isn't her to drop out of Yale and be in the DAR. However, he feels like that can be mended with the right incentive - a new car, a new house, in exchange for the old Rory back.

Lorelai, very wisely, knows that if the "old Rory" is bought, it is actually not her daughter. She knows the problem is not Rory not being in school, but Rory not even *wanting* to go back.

Still, none of them actually say any of that to her face. Having Jess be the one doing it is one of the few nice parts of that season, because it makes sense. He knows her, not an idealized version, but the flawed, real one she showed him. He returns exactly to show her he made something for himself exactly like she believed he could, reminding rory of how she can trust her own judgment, and how she can make something for herself as well. He doesn't hesitate in comparing how different the two versions of her are, even if he might be wrong or sound jealous. Mostly, he points out that it is not normal for rory gilmore to ignore her mom. Everyone from her past could see it, and someone needed to say it. For some reason, Lorelai, Lane and even Paris couldn't, and Jess checked all the boxes.

[whencallstheheart]

Hi! I've recently discovered your blog and I can't wait to join in on the fun all throughout the season! I've been rewatching the show from s6 to 10 in preparation for the new season and in s8e12, E obvs chooses L. I'd love your impressions on E's speech to N, especially when she tells him 1) that she was looking for Jack in him, was trying to replace him and 2) that she loves him but is not in love with him. And how you think they can make this work with the 2nd chance they are giving them now because they're going to have to address it. I'm fairly new to the fandom (I binged 7 seasons during confinement lol it really got me through depressing times!) and wasn't really online during s8 so I'm not sure what were the discussions around this episode. Thank you!!

I'm so excited to have you here! I'm actually almost done with my own rewatch of the full series with someone who hadn't seen it. It's been a blast.

I think we're all sort of under the same understanding that Elizabeth wasn't being truthful with herself from Jack's death until like episode 10x11 honestly. She was scared of what she felt for Nathan. She didn't want to lose him the way she lost Jack. She chalked up what she was feeling for him to her trauma from Jack's death. She wasn't willing to open her heart to him so she went for the safe choice in Lucas. Our girl was not doing well but she was acting like everything was fine. She wouldn't talk to anyone about it. She kept that charade up for quite a while before we finally started to see it chip away last season.

I really think the fans are the ones who want Elizabeth to clear things up. I don't think Nathan needs that. Of course he needs to know that she loves him but I don't think he'd require an explanation of all the things she's said to him in the past. He understands her and he understands her trauma. I really don't think it's an issue for Nathan. He still loves her and just wants another chance. No one likes to be the second choice but I'm sure we'll see her express her feelings in a way that reassures him that it's really always been him.

[wanderingwomanwondering]

I had 911 playing in the background while I was working on some stuff and realized that the 6b buddie is full of callbacks/parallels to 509 past is prologue, especially some of the toni and clive narrative beats.

Clive is shocked by his car and bumps his head. He has a sort of 611 “in another life” moment when he mistakes hen for toni and then tells the story of how he used to know her

Clive referenced toni’s “armor” and her fear of letting romance into her life because she’s “taken a lot of shrapnel”. Sounds like eddie to me.

During the 509 casino robbery talk, toni explicitly said “a fool and his money are soon parted” (loosely) linking buddie via buck’s math superpowers and the poker date in 613 to toni and clive’s love story. Remember toni fell in love with clive but chose hen and her first husband. This feels connected to eddie in 615 focusing on his past with shannon via chris instead of choosing his future with buck and chris. I know he has good reasons for being stuck in this mode but still an interesting connection to the toni/clive story.

We got our intro to eddie chris and telenovelas in 509 when eddie compares the drama of toni and clives multidecade saga to a telenovela. He showed great interest in learning the story, giving ideas for how to help clive and toni rekindle their romance, and hoping for a happy ending. We see eddie and chris actually watching one in 615, the very ep where eddie was thinking about the past with shannon (along with chris) and having an emotional reaction to buck feeling seen by natalia and also trying to date her.

There was also the whole 509 hen and toni conversation about glimpsing a better future but being afraid to step into it because of family duty and feelings of guilt/shame. Hen said toni was sad and felt alone in her marriage and that clive was her second chance at a happier future. This basic sentiment feels directly tied to eddie now in s6. We could argue that eddie felt alone and isolated plus the guilt/shame of choosing fear over parenthood/partnership back when he was with shannon. Now that he’s on the precipice of something romantic with buck circa 615 cemetery scene, he’s probably feeling alone and guilty again because he hasn’t expressed his feelings (which his healing arc kinda requires) and is in a holding pattern just waiting for something.

Hen told her mom in 509 to seek happiness now, despite the mistakes of the past. Tia Pepa basically did the same thing in 614 with eddie.

509 is also where we got the chloe and gabi emergency call. It was all about gabi running from/not really facing her problems. But also about finally not running/leaving when things got tough with the pen thru chloe’s chest. Sound familiar?

Then there was the whole gem during that chloe and gabi rescue about needing to save one of them before being able to save the other. Plus oil (something rich and precious) trying to get out but being contained by the weight of the people holding it in. *screaming in 615* I could say more about the symbolism of all that in the context of s6 buddie but I gotta sleep eventually lol

Then in the 509 closing scenes:

Toni: Hi! Sorry I’m late.

Clive: But you’re worth the wait.

If this isn’t buck and eddie i don’t know what is. The 615 cemetery scene felt like eddie loudly waiting on buck to see him and understand his feelings. But nope. Buck’s not there yet and eddie needs to speak/express.

Uh, Yeah. So in summary 509 was doing a lot of work to set up key themes and issues in 6b. I’m here for it 🤡🤡🤡

[paceyjoeydaily]

Hi can I ask you why do you think Joey chose Eddie over Pacey ?

Was she over Pacey ever ? And what might-have she e told him if Bessie did not interrupt ?

Oh this is an interesting question, or multitude of questions, and is definitely stuff that I've thought about before. This is just my opinion, I'm not actually sure why Joey did any of this stuff, but this just my own interpretation.

Firstly, I think Joey chose Eddie over Pacey because she was scared. Pacey says so himself in that episode (6x18), that Joey gets scared and pushes things away because of that fear and I think that plays into a lot of the reason she picks Eddie. I think because her love for Pacey was always so strong and deep, that she knew being with him again was going to be a serious relationship again that she just wasn't ready for. Joey also says a few episodes later that she thinks she needs to try being without Pacey (and Dawson) for a while, just to find herself. So, I don't think Joey picked Eddie over Pacey because she loves Eddie more, or because she wants to be with him more, I think she picks Eddie over Pacey for the same reason she initially picked her friendship with Dawson over being with Pacey in s3, because it was safer. Her relationship with Eddie was never as all consuming or terrifying as her relationship with Pacey, so it seemed safer. I also think Joey felt like she needed to see her relationship with Eddie through until the end, just to make sure that she was making the right choice, her and Eddie never really had complete and total closure, so I think Joey wanted that as well.

As for Joey ever being "over" Pacey, I think she always loved him. I think she always looked back on her time being with him as something she missed and felt fondly about. I think Joey pushed herself to be "over" him because he was the one that broke up with her, and he was the one that left. I see Joey get a lot of flack from people for moving on really fast in s5 and never "pining" over Pacey or caring about his relationships, but when you think about how Pacey broke up with her and then left for the summer and when he came back, he didn't tell Joey, it makes sense that Joey would keep her heart guarded and push any residual feelings for Pacey down that she might still have. It was easier for her to pretend that she was over him, to push him to move on, then it was to still have feelings for him, when he was the one that ended things. I don't think Joey ever truly got over Pacey, but I think she convinced herself she was in order to protect her heart. (I would argue that Pacey did the same thing until s6 when he admitted he wasn't over her, considering he, too, spends s5 dating other people and encouraging Joey's relationships with other people, just as she does).

And for what I think Joey would have said if Bessie hadn't walked in, I honestly am not really sure. What Joey is saying in that scene, is that while Dawson is a childhood love that is tied to who she was when she was 15 (an incredibly common thread throughout their relationship), Pacey is a love that she has been running from because she's never felt truly ready for it. Obviously, we can understand based on this scene and the ending scene between Pacey and Joey, that Joey ultimately decides to stop running and realizes she's ready for her relationship with Pacey. However, I'm not really sure exactly what she would have said. I think she might have told him that she's ready to stop running from him, that maybe she doesn't want Dawson or 'New York Guy', I'm not really sure, honestly, I think the way the scene plays out actually works really well. While I have always wished we got to see the scene where Joey did pick Pacey and tell him that she wanted to be with him, I feel like it didn't fit in during this particular moment between them. (Personally, I believe she went and talked to Pacey after the scene between her and Dawson outside of Dawson's house, but that's just me).

This answer is probably WAY longer than you were expecting and I apologize for rambling, but I have so many thoughts and feelings especially on Joey's feelings and actions within her relationship with Pacey because I feel she's so misunderstood. Thanks for asking! <3

[esther-dot]

In s6-7 twice Sansa compared Jon to her bethroted/husband. First she compared Jon with Ramsey and was talking about his bastard status and her Stark name and how could they ally together to fight against Boltons. Then she compared Jon with Joffery for not listening to her but she also validate him saying he was better than Joffery. Both Joffery and Ramsey are narrative foils to Jon both in books and show. By making her comparison is weird choice by the makers.

It's so weird, anon! Having Sansa compare Jon to Joffrey was odd, but I suppose they felt the need to clobber us over the head with that one since they made some parallels with Dany and Joffrey later, and wanted us to know, Jon was the good guy (the true heir, the merciful ruler...) in each scenario.

Of course, Ramsay is an extreme by any standards, but a bastard marrying a Stark girl to take Winterfell is an interesting thing to include in a foil for Jon who refuses to take Winterfell from Sansa, but will be tempted to take it again in the books and there’s spec he might marry Sansa post parentage reveal, the contrast between Jon and Theon (who thought about marrying Sansa) will come into play, I think, when Jon has family but remains loyal to the Starks no matter what temptations they may offer.

Show wise, D&D inserted "so my watch begins" for Tyrion when he marries Sansa but promises not to touch her which is super odd considering how that is associated with the Night's Watch (Jon) and Sansa's courtesy is viewed as a wall by Tyrion in the books (Jon is sworn to protect the Wall), so it isn't out of nowhere that it appeared in the show, it's just weird? And in the show, Tyrion brings up the fact that he never consummated the marriage to Jon (ok??? why???) and then when Tyrion proposed remarrying and Sansa rejected him they cut to Jon... There were comparisons and connections made between Jon and each of the three men Sansa was meant to/or did marry in the show, and for what?

During s8 I said that D&D put more effort into the story they didn't tell than the one they did and I haven't changed my mind! 😂

[ouatsnark]

On the topic of Gold.

People really don't talk about how bad of a dad, granddad, and husband he was after he became the dark one.

I will not deny he was a good/decent dad to Baelfire before he became the dark one? But after?

The poor kid was terrified and ended up hating magic because of it, even into adulthood.

He traded away their second kid without discussing with Milah OR Belle when the two started dating.

He was all for murdering his grandson knowing the pain it would cause (because he lost a kid. He knew what it felt like and was willing to permanently injury/kill Henry. To permanently take away three people (HIS OWN SON'S) ten year old son and two people's own grandson (not including him in that since he clearly didn't care) before he found out Neal was dead.

He didn't respect Neal's wishes or Belle's.

He stole someone's baby during the hero and villains' thing.

He was gonna take ASHLEY'S baby and has been implied to have taken others, for purposes we do not know.

And he killed Milah TWICE. Like wtf.

And I don't see enough people talk about it?

People will seriously defend him to the grave not acknowledging any of this.

I don't get how. The man was willing to permanently take away multiple people's children (his 'true love's' and his own son's son included) despite knowing damn well how it felt.

And he doesn't show much remorse, does he?

I hate that retcon with the Charmings being baby snatchers but at least they showed remorse!

I don’t think much discussion happens around Gold at all because he was a minor character and not in the way of any major ships. Sad, isn’t it? Because the ship he is involved in was toxic as hell and deserves a lot of discussion!

Yes, I will agree that Rumple was a decent father before becoming the dark one. Rumple, however, was never a descent husband. To be fair, Milah wasn’t a decent wife either. Her anger over her husband being unable to kill someone when she, herself, wasn’t willing to do it, is just … wrong. But Rumple trading his second born without telling Milah (and later not disclosing this to Belle) was an asshole, cowardly, move. Does that make him a rotten father though? He was doing everything he could for his son. I do believe branding himself a coward was selfish and did his family wrong by dishonoring them.

However, blaming Rumple for his actions after being consumed by darkness is a tricky thing. I don’t fully blame Rumple because he was literally just consumed by darkness. He wasn’t even aware at the time what he was doing even though anger, cowardice and indignation led him to this fate… he was still consumed by a literal evil force. I begin to blame Rumple for his actions as the Dark One around the time he let his son fall through a portal. He was struggling there for control and he lost it. It’s like when Killian chose Emma above his power and over his own life. Rumple was just weaker.

The Rumple stans 100% do not acknowledge that Rumple’s love for Henry was very much contingent on his own happy ending. If Neal hadn’t been dead, Henry would be dead. If it had come down between Henry and Belle, he wouldn’t have hesitated to kill Henry. Rumple was very selfish.

And that selfishness showed in how he controlled Belle’s life. He never asked her before he did anything. He put her in a sleeping curse so he could get what he wanted in S4 during the shattered sight curse. He went against her wishes to wake her in S5. And again in S6 he locked her on his ship, tried to force her to give him their child and then didn’t ask her in S6 finale if she wanted to participate in his mother’s curse! Her life was basically a chess piece for him to maneuver around to gain his own happiness.

Rumple also got away with killing Milah twice. And I always forget: HELP ME OUT HERE… does Belle know that Rumple killed Milah or does she still think it’s Killian’s fault? Because that was always a WTF for me. I am pretty sure Rumple lets her think he isn’t a wife killer when he is.

And no, Rumple has zero remorse. After all “it is the man he is.”

I also hate the Charming baby snatching retcon but to be fair they didn’t know it was a human child. So in no way are they even on the same plane of evil as Regina or Rumple. But yes, they are the only ones to show remorse for harming a child. Well, Killian too. He regrets leaving Bae to Pan after being offended by Bae’s rejection.

P.S. The baby he stole during the AU was baby Snowflake aka Snowing’s child.

[kmze]

Not sure if my ask was sent before so I'm sending it a second time and You don't have to respond to this if you don't want to.I haven't discussed tvd in ages actually but I guess I just needed to let this out.

The manufactured "awkwardness" in the first episode was way too obvious,Kris.If you go back to s6 or even s5 or seasons prior,there was NEVER any awkwardness between them.Like you mentioned in your recap,Paul/Stefan was effortless around Candice/Caroline in s2.I remember Dries kept talking about them being "awkward" at the interviews as if that conniving shrew WANTED that to play out on screen.

I also remember how melodramatic Stefan's scenes were with You-know-who in the Rebecca Sonnenshine episodes and deliberately contrived.She gave them THE COFFEE scenes, Kris!!! Why did they play a wedding First dance song during her goodbye scene?It was the most unfit music moment ever done by Chris Mollore!

Paul's acting was,I don't know,unimpressive that season even though he was one of the very few people on that show who could actually act.!At times it felt like he was overacting around You-Know-Who.I don't remember him acting like that around Katherine or Elena.His chemistry with Katherine was always better than that with Elena though.I always sensed a weird stiffness in Paul when he was around Elena especially in s1 & s2.Not sure if it was because he was expected to play a tortured soul or because, like PW had said ,he took a lot of time getting comfortable in his role.However,something was wrong in  season 7 about his performance and I couldn't quite put a finger on it.Even the "I'll not let anything happen to you" didn't land or have the same impact.Not sure if it was the acting or the direction.In almost all the episodes,SC scenes were either heavily edited or abruptly cut in between.(1/2)

(2/2) Remember the twist in the mythology Dries kept blabbering about the whole time?What was the twist?That there was NO TWIST? Or that Stefan-You Know Who was the new hybrid version of SC-Forewood?

Stefan(6×16): I don't know when it became more than friendship but it did.

Stefan(7×16):Our friendship evolved.

Remind me again what exactly Stefan was running from because the whole Rayna-thing was severely unconvincing.

(A tiny part of me even dreaded a late reveal that they had Caroline and You-Know-Who's souls switched the whole time.)

Anyway,the whole "running away together" was a total ripoff of s3 Forewood which reminds me of something else about Tyler.For someone who claimed to have made the best decision by leaving MF, he sure as hell was interested in MF business for e.g coming back for Caroline's baby shower or protecting Elena's coffin which is why him randomly appearing in flash forwards and telling Stefan he didn't want to be involved in his and Caroline's drama only to change mind and say he would warn Caroline and never appear again??? The flash forwards were the biggest bunch of BS that tvd churned out.

Don't even remind me of Penny's death mystery/revenge.Even if Stefan compelled Matt to forget,how come he or for that matter an entire police department stayed convinced  she died in a car accident when Stefan's blood didn't even work on Penny i.e the bullet wound was still there! What kind of brain-dead morons worked there?Didn't they send the body for autopsy?Also if Stefan had been travelling for 3 years,isn't it too much of a coincidence that he just happened to have been in the US right when Matt released the huntress?How did Matt do it on his own?What were the logistics involved?And of course,Enzo was the root cause of 95% of the problems starting with bringing Rayna into everyone's lives and blackmailing Damon into giving up the sword using a lie and eventually preventing Bonnie,before the time jump, from sharing a key info with Damon that if they killed the everlasting they could stop Rayna.Bonnie was the one who figured it out on her own but post time jump that credit went to Matt so he could play hero!And neither he nor Enzo was held accountable especially Enzo for what he was doing to Bonnie for three years.

Stefan weirdness:

Exhibit 1: He used to binge watch Say Yes to the Dress! (What the hell was the prop department smoking?)

Exhibit 2: Writing "Dear Caroline" in BLOCK Letters with no address? Really?Didn't he maintain journals for over a century?Let's not even go into the whole grammatical error part because that made me wanna bash his head against something like Lexi did.

I think it was Melinda Tsu,Brian Young and Rebecca Sonnenshine whose writing infuriated me the most.And I think s7 caused a lot of discontent amongst the cast and it was sadly noticeable during s8 no matter how much they tried to hide it.They just wanted it to end.

All good anon! Everything came through and yeah it’s kind of nice therapy to let it out about all the things that bothered us in these seasons! Some stuff I can’t quite remembering and I’m trying not to watch future scenes during my rewatch so I might not have answered everything as well as I could have.

Awkwardness: Yep, exactly. It was the kind of awkwardness that wasn’t there before, so it felt super deliberate when I look at the overall season. There was an interview after season 6 ended (and I can’t find it) where Julie said that originally Stefan and Caroline were going to get together in the season 6 finale but Dries (see a pattern) convinced her that no they should wait and give Caroline time to heal. It would have been so much better if they had gotten together in the finale! I know initially I thought “oh well that’s good because then we wouldn’t have seen them getting together and the cuteness” because I was naïve to think this show wouldn’t start with angst the first chance it got. It also would have made narrative-sense since Stefan and Caroline always kept getting drawn back together no matter how much they fought it (like magnets).

SV: That damn coffee scene was really just there to piss us off. The song in their break-up didn’t bother me that much but I do understand why it annoyed people. I took it as that song was Valerie’s POV like that’s for letting me love you now I’m going to go find a life. The song that pisses me off that they used is “Little Do You Know” in 7x16 that was such a Steroline song and I can’t even listen to it anymore remembering how it was used in the show.

Paul’s acting: Oh yes 100% he seemed uninterested because I don’t think he knew where the storyline was going and maybe he doesn’t take good direction from Dries (or she doesn’t give it). There is an awkwardness with him and Elena in S1 that made me not really care for them, he just looks like he stubbed his toe when he kisses her all the time, and I don’t really understand it. They get better in S2 from what I’ve seen so far but I also think he became more comfortable in the role in S2. With Katherine him and Nina play it perfectly as that sort of “fine line between love and hate” ship and I think that ends up being a more interesting dynamic to watch for some. With Candice it’s just so effortless in how he plays Stefan’s comfort with her. For me the biggest problem in some of S7 was they did not let their scenes breathe! Like you mentioned the “I will not let anything happen to you” in S2 they linger on them after he says it and he pulls her into a hug and they didn’t really do that in 7x13 (though I blame the editors more than Paul’s acting I thought overall that was a good episode for him). Even in 2x13 the scenes at Caroline’s door are given so much time to breathe and linger and make an impact! There’s also the fact that Caroline’s porch becomes a big symbolism location for her in all her romances and it’s basically the door is her heart and we see who she lets in. This gifset and my thoughts explain it well. Even the kiss in 7x01 gets cut up weirdly even though the scene overall is great (door symbolism again, Stefan says he’s going to bolt the front door and then Caroline gives in and kisses him). S7 definitely gets better with the pacing and editing for the Steroline scenes after 7x16 though, like Stefan at the door in 7x19, all their scenes in 7x21 and then in 7x22 they are back to being themselves which of course was because Julie came back and Dries was completely gone.

Rayna: Bruh I have no idea what the point of the FF were, there was never any twist I feel like all the did was fill me with dread, and then the payoff episode in 7x16 was just everyone talking on the phone driving around in cars. Why did Stefan burn his car? Why did Stefan drive around the continental US with a blood-stained shirt for days? What did Caroline say in the broadcast? I will say I do understand why Stefan thought he couldn’t be with Caroline because of the twins but I didn’t really understand the being on the run thing since she was locked up. I thought maybe it was supposed to be that he was trying to find an answer on how to fix it (kinda like Caroline being gone in Legacies) but it’s never really explained. Just seemed like manufactured wangst and when JP came back she was like “this is stupid lets move on.”

Tyler nonsense/writers: I feel like the writers had no idea what to do with Tyler once they had decided they were ending Forwood for good (even though LivTyler was very cute they could have just not killed her!). I think it was scienter who had an ask a few weeks ago where someone said if Nina didn’t leave after S6 there was going to be a cliffhanger and someone was going to die and she thought it was Tyler and I agree. They had no idea what to do with him and they couldn’t really do a triangle with Stefan/Caroline/Tyler because it had been pretty established in canon Caroline always chose Stefan over Tyler, like even when Forwood was together (ala 4x09). LOL the Penny thing is so dumb but also shows how stupid Matt is because why when you know about the existence of vervain and vampires would you not STILL BE TAKING IT! I mean he really thought telling them to all leave would work? No back-up plan? The Mystic Falls PD is just as bad as Gotham City PD I’m not sure they’ve ever solved a crime, remember when Liz had all those open cases and Damon was like “oh this is all me” and she laughed. I don’t remember a lot of the Rayna plot device stuff and I actually forgot Enzo was the root cause of most of that, I will never understand why his death was supposed to be a bad thing, most useless character ever. I don’t remember exhibit 1 but exhibit 2 I just chock that up to prop department, at least they put something that made sense and not a scene from a random movie with no relation to the plot. I do agree Young and Sonnennshine were the most influenced by Dries and Sonnennshine particularly seemed to like writing SV. I believe I saw a BTS photo/post that her and Elizabeth (who played Valerie) were friends so she might have been influenced by that. Melinda could still keep SC strong in her episodes like 7x03 and 7x11 plus she wrote the first proposal and 6x19 so I can’t be mad at her. Young though, he was the most influenced by Dries (they are IRL BFFs) like the difference between 7x09 and 7x22 is staggering.

I do agree some of the acting looked like people were ready to leave in season 8 (cough Ian cough) but Paul and Candice were really great that season IMO. Stefan looked at Caroline with so much awe and love between 8x01-8x07 and gave us such amazing moments, probably because the direction of the story was initially pointing in them being happy together in the end but then KW had to ruin everything.

[like-sands-of-time]

Remember the episode where cuddy has her naming ceremony for Rachel? And she goes out of her way to invite house at the beginning of the episode, only to immediately run to Wilson to get him to talk House out of it? It's all set up in the name of angst and look at how she cares for him too but honestly what did she expect him to do? She tells him to come. He says ok. She tells Wilson to tell him not to go he says ok. She says to his face nooo it's fine you should come. He says ok. This is during season five, before houses big psychotic break and maturity during s6 and he doesn't fight her on it, doesn't show up just to spoil things like she seems to think he will. She straight up tells him I don't want you around this happy occasion because you'll ruin it !!

Why the hell were the writers so obsessed with not only showing us how much House hated himself and thought no one actually cared for him, but also showing how the few people he actually had in his life underestimate or misunderstand him too? They even show Wilson as not understanding why he would go, before he helps him work through a justification. But then Wilson's just gone for the rest of the episode and he never finishes that conversation with House that should've have basically been "house I know how much you care about her, and therefore her daughter, I really think you should go with me just to show that" but no it's all angsty montage of cuddy waiting hopefully by the door. Like why do you want him to drop in unannounced?? You made it pretty clear how you felt

[raayllum]

For some S4 positivity:

I am loving the different outlooks on Aaravos we are getting! I know people were/are ranting about how Zubeia did an exposition dump on Aaravos’s backstory. But we have to remember: a) the entire arc of s4-s6 is called the mystery of aaravos, not the season. and b) she’s a bias party who does not have all the information (and at one point, she did like him too. since he was “respected and loved by all” she’s not excluding herself from this, notably). in contrast with claudia’s words to soren during their conversation, it’s so *chef’s kiss.*

it honestly makes me excited to see what other views we’ll get on aaravos, and his true motives.

I also really enjoyed terry’s coming out to viren, viren’s panic attacks and how they were handled, claudia being a badass and no longer passive, and all of soren’s scenes. aaravos’s single scene in episode 4 was also 👌🏻 delicious. the new intro is also fun to listen & watch to! i love going back just to analyze it.

i’m sure i have more to say, but this is what i can think of off the top my head!

Right, like S4 pushes what we already knew (there was a mutual history of some kind between the Draconic Royal family and Aaravos) and then just amplifies it

Then we S4 we get hints at both of their perspectives on how they felt about each other personally

Like all we learned was that

Aaravos may have been involved in getting rid of the previous dragon monarch, Luna Tenebris. This is not confirmed.

Aaravos was likely involved in getting rid of Queen Aditti but we already knew that thanks to be the audience in 3x07

Aaravos has done what he did to Viren (and is doing to Claudia) many times across history. This doesn't tell us much of anything new, merely that his current machinations aren't anything new, either.

The Orphan Queen exposed his treachery in some way, according to Zubeia. The Key of Aaravos was symbolically or literally involved in doing so

Claudia confirms that Aaravos did, or at least tells humans that he did, give him magic through dark magic. This was implied all the way back in 3x01. Now it's confirmed

And... that's it. We still don't know exactly how the prison was constructed, or what crimes he was precisely imprisoned for, or what exactly he wants besides Zubeia and Soren's best guesses that are vague, but communicate intense destruction and upheaval. There's still plenty of mystery, but given that 1) this information had to be communicated orally to some degree (as Aaravos' name disappears when you read it) and 2) Zubeia has been alive for 300+ years to know what happened, even if her mate wasn't involved, I'd take this any day over only hearing from Aaravos himself, because that's about as untrustworthy as they come

It makes me think about how we hear about the death of the Dragon King and Zym over and over again. In 1x02, Rayla claims that humans attacked them unprovoked and Callum doesn't dispute it, even if we only learn in 2x05-2x06 this isn't true at all, thanks to his mother's dead at Thunder's hands. We're led to believe in the 1x01 intro that something rivalling an army took Avizandum down, and then learn in 3x06 that it was literally just Viren and King Harrow with two big dark magic spells that are extremely rare and powerful to manifest. We learn about Rayla's parents fleeing in 1x05 and only get the truth of how that encounter (and how indeed how Viren played into it, after it was hinted in 1x08) played out in 3x08. The show loooves to recontextualize and build to / add to things and perspectives over time. At this point I don't think they have to spell it out

[shummashum]

Klaus Goldstein Ch1 (11~15)

ooh… finally the dance time came

Remb asked Liz who she would like as her partner.

Shall we dance?

for your information, there's no refuse option you said that she could always ask if she had any trouble! don't tell me you're trying to retract what you said

He asked her why she chose him, and she responded that it was because everyone knew he was the best dancer around here.

so he's good at dancing? like a dance machine? okay! my next drawing theme is Klaus doing Just Dance or Pump It Up

and another pointing out again sure Klaus, let's get you to bed…

As the music started, the two clasped hands and took the first steps after politely bowing to each other.

Al taught her… then really, she was able to ask him since he's her practice opponent, wouldn't it have been better to ask him? his moves will be familiar, after all

but! this is Klaus' route so she's supposed to choose him as her partner

I think so too aren't you busy with with Ministry work

why do you talk like that she cared about you and is this what she got back oi,,,

umm no just do your work Ministry work is more important than dance classes which anyone with a certain level of skill can teach…

uh, whatever. anyway, it seems like there is something between the two

whut

something splendiferous just happened

erm isn't he being too sincere?! oi calm down go easy on her she's a newbie

erm,,,,,,, I think he's out of his mind just because seeing a newbie

btw I already felt this during Zeus' route but CG quality has improved, especially in terms of coloring and shadowing I like this new art style!

spare her ! ! this guy is insane

well but now I get it, he's highly skilled in dancing is dancing one of the virtues of a member of a prestigious family or what…

yeah yeah I already knew you had no heart for newbies Al over there taught her at her level, moreover he treated her very kindly even though she was a newbie though,,,,,,

A moment later, she spotted Zeus pushing his way toward her through the crowd.

oh.. he can dance? I can't believe he's willing to do such a classy and authoritative act but I think she needs a break because she was beaten the shit out of Klaus?

he hasn't changed at all! I've always thought it's good that things don't change but… you said you would change little by little in your happy ending! I trusted you! what is this he hasn't grown at all!

and they started scratching each other again now it just feels like background music

and here comes other potential opponents guess a situation is being created where she has to dance with everyone except Hiro oi Hiro you won't dance right? I trust you?

seems like he doesn't give a shit in any of this right now though that face that of an office worker tired of overtime and bullshit

huh totally unexpected

and she mentioned Lucious, huh

She recalled what happened with Luci and made up her mind that one day she would find a way to get him out of the labyrinth.

weelll meaningful results might come out during his own route, and this "making a plan to escape the labyrinth" will continue throughout S6 to S7 then, apart from that plan, there must be an incident that runs through S6… the one who manipulate Minotaur? or maybe it has something to do with what Remb wants to ask for this time?

Anyway, the viewpoint moved to Luci.

don't worry! you'll escape there someday! …maybe.

Then suddenly, a dark figure in the distance caught his attention.

it's that that… of the killer doll vibe that came out after Zeus failed to summon in his route come to think of it, it ran away while Liz was interrogating whether it was the real Taffy… but how did it get into the labyrinth huh

-Ch1 End-

[canonicallyobserving911]

Buck & Eddie: Before Buck’s Breakdown

Eddie had a mental breakdown in S5 but Buck could be heading towards having a breakdown of his own in S6.

This post includes detailed character studies on Buck and Eddie to illustrate how Eddie’s behaviors led to his mental breakdown and how Buck’s past and recent behaviors could lead to him having a breakdown of his own.

Eddie and Buck have experienced a lot of traumatic events both together and separately.  Those events have led them to therapy but Buck stopped talking to Dr. Copeland towards the end of season 4 and by the end of season 5 he hadn’t returned to therapy.  Eddie restarted his sessions with Frank after Bobby ordered him to go back into therapy for the second time in season 5B.  If the narrative about the way Buck doesn’t deal with things that affect him continues, it’s possible he could have a mental breakdown of his own in season 6 that could be worse than the one Eddie experienced.  They’ve both said they felt like they weren’t enough but Eddie said it in season 3 while Buck said it in season 4; therefore if their storylines keep paralleling, then all the pain and hurt Buck’s been carrying around with him for the last 31 years could contribute to him having a breakdown in season 6.  Let’s review some of their behaviors and compare some of the things that contributed to Eddie’s breakdown with Buck’s behaviors and how they could lead to him having a mental breakdown of his own.

Relationships

Buck and Eddie have experienced lopsided relationships with women who truly didn’t know them, used them to get what they wanted and broke their hearts. Those relationships led to them blaming themselves for being abandoned or hurt but some of the contributing factors that caused their relationships to end, weren’t their faults.  They both took the initiative to breakup with their girlfriends in season 5 since the relationships weren’t what either of them needed.  The difference is Eddie admitted the real reason why he needed to end it during his breakup but Buck didn’t.  Buck avoided the real reason why he should have ended it long before they reached the one-year mark of their relationship.

Eddie

Buck told Eddie to breakup with his girlfriend

Buck told Eddie to break up with his girlfriend in 5x2 “Desperate Times” because he knew Eddie wasn’t all in with her after he said he was planning to “stick it out” even though he knew it wasn’t working and it was causing him to have panic attacks.  He also realized that Eddie was only with her because of Christopher when he said, “My kid loves her” and Buck asked him if that was enough.  Buck continued and explained how he had been in a relationship with someone who wasn’t all in and how it hurts worse than the truth.  Eddie realized that he was only with her for Christopher’s sake so he had to decide if he was going to keep ignoring the red flags that were glaringly obvious in his relationship or if he was going to take a stand and do something for himself. Buck telling him he should end it was what he needed to hear and while Eddie had the benefit of someone telling him to end his relationship, Buck didn’t.

Eddie’s admission

Eddie admitted the truth to his ex-girlfriend in 5x3 “Desperate Measures” when he said, “I thought it would work. I…I did. The idea of us. Chris loves you so much”.  That was his admission to her and to himself that things would never work between them because (1) his heart wasn’t in it and (2) he was doing it for Christopher instead of for himself.  He cared more about the idea of them instead of actually wanting to be in a relationship with her.   Even though Eddie continued to use Christopher as a shield in 5x10 “Wrapped in Red” when he quit the 118, he did demonstrate how he had grown a little bit from using Christopher as a shield when he broke up with his girlfriend because he realized that he wasn’t in the relationship for the right reasons.  He thought he needed to find a mother for Christopher and based on the things he said to Bobby in 3x8 “Malfunction”, Eddie didn’t believe he was enough for someone to love both him and Christopher after his deceased wife asked him for a divorce in 2x17 “Careful What You Wish For” right after she told him that she didn’t want to be a wife or a mother anymore.  Eddie also quit his job because he was scared; therefore the time he spent in therapy after 5x13 “Fear-O-Phobia” helped him to grow even more once he understood that it was ok for him to want good things for himself instead of him just wanting Christopher to be happy (read blog post: “Eddie Diaz:  He’s going to therapy so that he can be better for himself” for more about Eddie’s therapy).

Buck

No one told Buck to breakup with his girlfriend

No one told Buck he should break up with his girlfriend even though someone probably should have; therefore he suffered through a roommates with benefits type of situation for a year only to finally end it with her after she broke a promise she made to him when she agreed to keep the information Chimney and Hen shared with them in 5x17 “Hero Complex” off the record.  Maddie didn’t tell him he should breakup with her when she returned in 5x13 “Fear-O-Phobia” even though she was very vocal with him in 2x1 “Under Pressure” about how she felt frustrated with the way his first girlfriend had abandoned him.

She even explained how the love part of an “Eat, pray, love” journey” is when the woman is out banging other guys so that he would understand that his first girlfriend wasn’t coming back to him.  She was right because his girlfriend didn’t return until two years later after she had a fiance’ and a family and she didn’t apologize to him.  At the time, he didn’t want to believe what Maddie told him so he kept waiting for her because he told Maddie that he liked who he was when he was with her. He identified himself via the relationship he had with her instead of learning who he was and how he needed to be in a healthy relationship with someone who would return his feelings instead of using him as a distraction like she did.

Eddie didn’t tell Buck to breakup with her either in 5x18 “Starting Over”, he just told Buck that he shouldn’t keep holding on to all his anger because if he did then he would eventually snap.  Buck didn’t show any signs of growth after he spent a year with her in his loft looking unhappy and unsettled but when Eddie’s comment from 5x18 about Buck’s relationship is compared to the two conversations they had after the lawsuit, Buck’s ability to show growth can easily be identified.

In 3x6 “Monsters” Buck offered Eddie his first apology for filing the lawsuit after he returned to work and Eddie wouldn’t talk to him.  After he made Eddie start talking to him at the end of their shift, Eddie asked him if he considered how filing the lawsuit would have affected them and Buck replied, “I needed my job back. I missed being here.  Being part of the team. I never meant for anyone to get hurt”.  Eddie called him out on it when he said, “There are a lot of I’s in there, Buck. Your actions, your choices, they impact the rest of us. That’s what it means to be a part of a team”.  They made up but Buck apologized a second time a few weeks later after he realized his mistakes.

Buck demonstrated growth when he admitted to Eddie during his second apology in 3x9 “Fallout” that he realized what he did was wrong when he abandoned Eddie and Christopher. He proved it when he said, “I’m sorry I wasn’t there Eddie. You and Chris needed me and I had my head so far up my own behind with that stupid lawsuit”.  Eddie said, “We’re way past that Buck” and Buck said, “I’m not! I should have been there”.  Buck not only learned from his mistakes, he admitted to them and apologized for the mistakes he made during his conversations with Eddie but the way he handled the breakup with his girlfriend was completely different.  He didn’t show how he learned from his past except for the fact that he ended the relationship with her instead of him waiting for her to do it.

Buck’s non-admission

Buck never admitted to himself that he wasn’t happy in his relationship with girlfriend #3 and the only reason he finally broke up with her was based on information he already knew and she reminded him of that when she said, “You knew who I was when you started dating me”.  Buck learned in 2x8 “Buck Actually” that she would put her job above everything else because it was important to her.  She was willing to embarrass him and his entire found family at the 118 after they had been dosed with a hallucinogen in 2x6 “Dosed” and she told him to his face that if the decision had been hers, she would have aired all the footage, including the part that showed Bobby standing on the roof of the firehouse when he was about to commit suicide.   Therefore Buck shouldn’t have been surprised at her actions in 5x17 “Hero Complex” after he spent an entire year with her and she hadn’t changed.  He broke up with her because she broke a promise to him but he didn’t breakup with her because he was unhappy (read blog post: “Evan “Buck” Buckley:  Promises are very important to him” for more about Buck and promises).  If he had broken up with her earlier and it had been based on his unhappiness, it would have demonstrated how he grew and learned from the past instead of him repeating the same mistake by dating her for a year and thinking he could learn to live with it.

He didn’t even discuss how unhappy he had been with her after he spent months in his loft looking confused, uncomfortable, sad, frustrated and sometimes angry.  After she told him about her childhood in 5x9 “Past is Prologue” and he chased her all the way to Oklahoma, he sat on the couch looking angry and frustrated as he hugged her.  It seemed like it was déjà vu for him because it was similar to the way he sat on the couch with girlfriend #1 before she abandoned him.  Then he asked her if she was angry with him for following her and she told him that she loved him for it.  He did the one thing she had been trying to get him to do which was chase her even though he said he didn’t want to do that again.  He was making the same mistakes all over again and the reason for him ending it only showed growth with regards to him understanding he could be the one to end a relationship.  Him breaking up with her didn’t show how he grew with regards to the things he should want for himself from a relationship.  Relationships take work not just co-habitation and it seems like that’s what Buck assumed after he asked her to move in with him.

Doors

After their breakups, Eddie’s ex-girlfriend closed the door to his kitchen while Buck’s ex-girlfriend left the door to his loft opened.  Eddie’s door being closed by his ex-girlfriend after he broke up with her, illustrated how his closed door could have represented a finality for him with regards to certain types of relationships. Was it meant to signify something specific with regards to his next relationship? Or could it mean he’s finally ready to admit who he wants to be with in a relationship? Does Buck’s opened door after she left mean he hasn’t admitted what he wants in a relationship?  Buck’s door being left open could mean a lot of things.  Since he never admitted that he was unhappy in that relationship and how he should have ended it way before he actually did, it could mean he might repeat the same mistake again in a future relationship.

Breakdowns

Eddie’s breakdown

Eddie’s breakdown had been building for years and even though he tried to keep pushing everything down so that he could keep moving forward, he couldn’t.  He desperately tried to go back to the way things had been before he quit his job when he tried to transfer back to the 118 but Bobby ordered him to go to therapy after he saw Eddie’s appearance in 5x11 “Outside Looking In”. He couldn’t continue running from his past and once Frank gave him a therapy assignment to complete, the metaphorical box he had been placing his emotions and feelings into, exploded just like Frank told him it would in 5x13 “Fear-O-Phobia”. Eddie’s breakdown happened after he had to face the fact that he almost died several times over the years including the three times he almost died while he was a firefighter, i.e., The Well, The Shooting and The Hostage Situation. He was faced with his PTSD and the fact that everyone he served with had died even though he pulled them all out alive from the downed helicopter. That’s why he kept saying “They’re all dead” after Buck broke down his bedroom door.  He had to face his own mortality and he couldn’t understand why he was still here.

In 5x14 “Dumb Luck” he told Bobby “I can’t believe they’re all gone and I’m still here. I’m not sure why." and Bobby replied, “That’s a question you will never be able to answer. You can chalk it up to the grand plan of some higher power or just dumb luck. But either way the result is the same, you are still here”.  Eddie said he didn’t know what to do with that but Bobby said he needed to find a way to heal and that’s what he started doing in therapy when he finally took it seriously.

Eddie told Bobby in 5x18 “Starting Over” “Look I spent the last few months trying to put away a lot of things from my past and move on. What I’ve learned is you can’t carry someone else’s weight; it’ll take you under”.  Eddie was finally growing and learning that he had to not only deal with his past, but he also had to accept it for what it was, admit to his mistakes and he learned how to start moving on.  His growth after years of pushing things down can easily be identified based on the two conversations, he had with Bobby in 5x14 and 5x18 but only portions of Buck’s growth can be identified since he never admitted that he was unhappy within his relationship.

Buck’s behaviors over the years could be leading to a breakdown

Buck hasn’t had a breakdown yet but he’s well overdue for one because he hasn’t really dealt with any of the things that happened to him or that disappointed him over his lifetime.  He’s avoided dealing with the abandonment he’s experienced from his parents and his ex-girlfriends, Eddie almost dying multiple times, the fact that he wants a family of his own and the fact that he almost died after the ladder truck bombing.  Even though Buck defined what love means to him in 5x18 “Starting Over”, he didn’t define what a good relationship means to him (read blog post: “Buck & Eddie: “That’s love!” for more on Buck’s definition of love). Therefore he hasn’t demonstrated any growth in that area of his life yet because he keeps trying to find it instead of making a relationship with someone who loves him endlessly and who won’t take advantage of him.

Buck tells everyone that he’s happy for them after they’ve hurt him or he apologizes to them even though they don’t apologize to him but he never deals with the fact that he’s unhappy. He should have told his first girlfriend after she returned in 3x18 “What’s Next?” that she did him dirty when she abandoned him in 1x10 “A Whole New You” but he didn’t.  He told her “I’m glad to see you happy [insert her name]. You deserve it”.  He was happy for her that she found herself but he was still hurt after he had spent months waiting for her to return but he never dealt with the hurt he experienced when she came back with a fiancé and a family.  He should have told girlfriend #2 that her waiting to breakup with him until right after he was discharged from the hospital in 2x18 “This Life We Choose” was a trifling move but he didn’t.  He was hurt by her actions but he pushed it down and tried to keep moving forward and focused solely on getting better so that he could go back to work.  After spending several months in a relationship that did nothing but make him feel sad, depressed, lonely and frustrated, he never told girlfriend #3 how him being with her wasn’t good for either of them.  All of those interactions proves that he’s holding onto all of the hurt he experienced from those relationships without him ever learning how to truly move on and get past it.  He just keeps letting it pile up and if he’s not careful the metaphorical box that he pushes his feelings into will explode just like Eddie’s did.

He told Maddie in 5x13 “Fear-O-Phobia” how he realized he was clinging to his girlfriend and how she had been there for him when he felt like everyone had left him behind but he never admitted that he was unhappy.  It seems like Buck still believes he has to take whatever leftovers someone offers him in a relationship and he doesn’t believe he has a say in it.  If all his past relationships with women are any indication of his growth, it’s easy to see there hasn’t been much of that for him.  He constantly gave while they took but he didn’t learn that he doesn’t have to always be the one giving.  Buck can’t think clearly when he’s in a relationship because he gets distracted with the idea of what he believes a relationship should be and then he describes it with words like “functional” which clouds his judgment and prevents him from being able to see the red flags that are always present.  All of the women he dated never truly got to know him and if they had they would have realized they gave up on a good man who loves with his whole heart and who will do anything for anyone. Buck just wants to be loved and when he’s in a relationship he tries to give his all.  He’s the fix it guy so he keeps trying to fix things even though he can’t and Eddie told him that in 5x4 “Home and Away” when he told Buck, “You’re the guy who always likes to fix things”.  Buck tries to fix things for everyone else but he never stops to fix things for himself.  He avoids dealing with his own problems and for whatever reason he keeps doing it.

The buildup to Buck’s breakdown

In 4x3 “Future Tense”, after Buck told Maddie that he was in therapy while he was at her and Chimney’s apartment, she went to his loft after he left so that she could find out why he started talking to Dr. Copeland.  He told her that she was the reason when she called him sad and lonely in 3x16 “The One That Got Away”. She was taken aback by it and explained how it had been months since she said that but he told her those were the kind of words that stuck with him (read blog post: “Evan “Buck” Buckley:  Words can hurt or heal him” for more on their conversation).  When she asked him why he believed she couldn’t help him or that he couldn’t talk to her, he told her it was because he thought she was sad too.

During the first dinner with their parents in 4x4 “9-1-1 What’s Your Grievance”, after Buck went into the kitchen with Chimney and Albert, Margaret said, “Evan seems good.  After you called, I was expecting…I don’t know what. But he seems fine”.  But Maddie said, “Yeah, I think he’s better at that than we think. Seeming fine”.  His parents still don’t know who Evan is and they were completely oblivious to the fact that he was hurting.  Buck wasn’t fine and Maddie knew it but his parents didn’t understand because they didn’t raise Buck, Maddie did.  Since Maddie raised him she knows how he acts in different situations and she also knows how he acts fine when he really isn’t.

Buck almost gave up in 4x5 “Buck Begins” when he questioned who he was after he learned his family’s secret about his dead brother Daniel.  His parents were at the firehouse waiting for him and even though they never apologized to him, he told them that he was sorry that he couldn’t save Daniel.  Buck was still taking the blame for something that wasn’t his fault and Eddie told him that after Buck told the 118 how he had been born for “parts, defective parts”.  Eddie said, “That’s not on you” but Buck said, “I doubt they would agree”.

When he went to Chimney’s apartment after the conversation with his parents, he told Maddie their parents asked him to forgive them and he told her that he did.  Buck entered with sad eyes, looking down and appearing like the weight of the world was on his shoulders.  He looked so young when he met Maddie’s eyes and it was probably the same way he looked at her when he was a child.  He was hurting and Maddie knew it so she tried her best to be there for him.  He looked sad but when he saw Maddie’s concern for him, he pushed it down and put on a happy face.  Buck did what he does best, he apologized to or told people who hurt him that he was happy for them while he ignored his own feelings of being sad, hurt or depressed.

In 4x8 “Breaking Point”, Buck started pursuing the woman he KNEW he should have avoided because of his encounters with her from 2x6 “Dosed” and 2x8 “Buck Actually”.  He told her he wanted to be in a meaningful relationship and she told him that his life was already filled with meaningful relationships.  He continued to pursue her even though she kept friend zoning him. She told him to his face that he was “needy” after she had just embarrassed him in front of Albert and Veronica when she told them he was intimidated by strong women. Buck looked mortified when she said that so the only logical explanation for why he kept pursuing her after all of those interactions was he believed that she was all he deserved.  She treated him like his mother used to when he was growing up (read blog post: “Evan “Buck” Buckley: HUSBAND vs. HIMBO” for more about Buck and the way women have treated him).

Then she friend zoned him again in 4x12 “Treasure Hunt” but she did a 180 degree turn after Eddie was shot and told him in 4x14 “Survivors” that she wanted him.  The only thing that changed for her in the week it took for her to tell him she wanted to be with him was the fact that Eddie was in a coma and she made her move on Buck while he was vulnerable (read blog post: “Buck & Eddie: Buck has always been in LOVE with Eddie; Taylor never had a chance” for more on the topic of how Buck was approached after Eddie had been shot).

Buck had also become unhappy at work after Maddie and Chimney left because he blamed himself for Chimney being upset.  Instead of placing the blame where it should have been, he thought it was all his fault and he wanted to fix it for everyone.  He was so upset that he wanted to transfer out of the 118 but Bobby wouldn’t let him.  Buck’s answer to everyone else leaving him was to leave too which would have only made him more unhappy but he still hadn’t grasped the idea that when people leave, it didn’t and doesn’t always have something to do with him.  Once again Buck was trying to punish himself instead of placing the blame on those who hurt him. He was willing to sacrifice being with his found family and starting over at a new firehouse so that everyone would be happy but he wouldn’t have been happy so him transferring wasn’t the answer.

Buck hasn’t dealt with any of his emotions and feelings that he experienced the numerous times when he believed he lost Eddie.  With each trauma he experienced with Eddie, his screams of Eddie’s name became quieter as he tried to mentally prepare for the day when he might see Eddie’s lifeless body.  In 3x15 “Eddie Begins”, after Eddie cut his line, Buck wanted to go down to save him and he told Bobby, “Cap, I should be the one to go down”.  He was willing to sacrifice himself then for Eddie but Hen stopped him when she said, “So we can have two cut lines?”. But when The Well collapsed, Buck screamed Eddie’s name seven times as he tried to dig him up with his bare hands.  When he told the 118, “You all think he’s dead” they knew he was on the brink of another hysterical reaction so they tried to stay calm so that he would remain calm.  He wasn’t ok until he saw Eddie alive and well but he hasn’t talked about it since that time.

Eddie being shot by a sniper in front of Buck in 4x13 “Suspicion” was traumatic for both of them.  When Eddie hit the ground, Buck went into a catatonic state of shock and couldn’t move.  If it hadn’t been for Captain Mehta, he could have been hit too.  Buck screamed for Eddie and told him to put his hand out as he crawled underneath the firetruck to get to him.  He dragged Eddie’s limp body underneath the firetruck in 4x14 “Survivors”, picked him up, loaded him in the firetruck with help from the 133 and he held gauze to Eddie’s wound to try and stop the bleeding.  When Buck walked through the glass doors to leave the hospital he looked like a ghost.  His face was pale and his eyes were red from crying but he remained cognizant enough to know that he needed to talk to Christopher.  Buck and Eddie were faced with losing each other again and it scared them both but it was different for Buck that time because he was standing right in front of Eddie.  Even though Buck saved Eddie’s life, he was willing to sacrifice himself when he told Eddie it should have been him who got shot while they were in the hospital talking after Eddie woke up from his coma. The Shooting took a mental toll on both Buck and Eddie and they haven’t dealt with any of it or the ramifications that followed.   They emotionally distanced themselves from each other but Buck has tried to talk to Eddie about it twice but Eddie is not ready to discuss it yet (watch and view: “Buck & Eddie: Panic” and “Buck & Eddie: The Glass Doors” to see the two times Buck has tried to talk to Eddie about The Shooting).

Buck was faced with losing Eddie a third time in 5x6 “Brawl in Cell Block 9-1-1” after they had been held hostage by two escaped convicts.  Buck didn’t want to leave Eddie alone in the ambulance with Mitchell but he reluctantly left after Eddie called his name and said, “Buck!” when Mitchell threatened to go to Eddie’s house and kill Christopher.  Since Buck was inside of the hospital, he thought Eddie had been shot again when he heard a gunshot but instead of running away from the sound, he ran towards it because he thought Eddie was either dead or about to die.  He called Eddie’s name four times but it wasn’t like the way he screamed for Eddie at The Well.  When he saw that Eddie was ok, he listened to Eddie’s instructions and went to get the supplies Eddie requested. They didn’t sit next to each other after it was over and Eddie left to go home to be with Christopher but Buck didn’t follow him.

Christopher called Buck in a panic about something being wrong with Eddie in 5x13 “Fear-O-Phobia” and Buck rushed to the Diaz house.  When he arrived, he asked Christopher what was wrong and he said, “He won’t come out. I keep calling him but he won’t answer”.  Buck reassured him and he tried talking to Eddie through the door but when Eddie didn’t answer, Buck broke down the door and he was panicked at the destruction he witnessed inside of Eddie’s bedroom. He called for Eddie twice that time but he didn’t scream his name like he did at The Well, after The Shooting or after The Hostage Situation. He called for him with an unsettling albeit quiet panic laced voice and he wasn’t relieved until he heard Eddie crying.  He rushed over to him and asked Eddie what was wrong but concern remained on Buck’s face and he even told Eddie that he was scared out of his mind just like Christopher was.

There have been a lot of other things that have happened to Buck over the last several years but he didn’t start going to therapy on his own until season 4.  TM stated in an interview before season 5 started that Buck had stopped going to therapy and how he wouldn’t be returning to it any time soon. Therefore Buck hasn’t talked to Dr. Copeland or anyone else about all of his trauma, his feelings of abandonment and his unhappiness.  He told Dr. Copeland in 4x3 “Future Tense” that he hides his true feelings from others and he does.  He’s spent a lot of time hiding his hurt and pain so that the people who’ve hurt him won’t know that he’s hurting.  He tried to hide the hurt he felt from girlfriend #1 when he told her she deserved to be happy.  He bit his lip when he told his parents that he was sorry about Daniel and he looked destroyed when girlfriend #2 broke up with him right after he was discharged from the hospital.  Buck can’t catch a break and he’s spent a long time trying to hide the things that bother him by putting on a smile and trying to move forward.  He’s sad and hurting.  Since he hasn’t been in therapy for more than a year and a half, that also means he hasn’t spoken to anyone about the traumas he experienced after Maddie left him again even though it was due to her PPD, Chimney punching him in the eye and the ramifications associated with his job as a firefighter after girlfriend #3 caused all that drama for him in 5x17 “Hero Complex” when she ran that story about Jonah and he was questioned by Chief Alonso.  Buck also hasn’t dealt with the reason why he asked his girlfriend to move in with him in 5x13 even though he knew it wasn’t right and that he wasn’t happy.  He cheated and he got a pass for it because girlfriend #3 didn’t want to know anything about it and she stayed with him because she was clinging to him just like he was clinging to her.  Buck didn’t learn that his actions have consequences too because his girlfriend didn’t breakup with him after he admitted to her that he cheated.  Instead of facing what he did and admitting he was unhappy and it wasn’t working, he just kept trying to keep their relationship together even though it was completely dysfunctional.  Buck deserves to be in a happy and in a fulfilling relationship with someone who will love him the way he should be loved and based on the narrative, there’s only one person who fits that description, EDDIE!

Did he show some growth in season 5?  Yes, he did but it was a limited amount of growth at best because he was the one to initiate the breakup instead of being the one who was broken up with but him doing that doesn’t demonstrate how he learned anything about the way good and well-balanced relationships are supposed to work.  He alluded to the fact that his relationship with girlfriend #3 had been like a comedy or a joke in 5x18 when he said, “That was a comedy” after he reminded Maddie of the Rom Com movie about the lady with amnesia. While Buck defined what love should be for himself in 5x18, it appears he hasn’t connected his definition to the way it should fit into a romantic relationship for him.  It takes Buck a while to connect the dots with regards to lessons and assignments he’s learning throughout the seasons so it appears he still may not have realized the relationship he’s wanted all along is available to him (read blog post: “Evan “Buck” Buckley:  Life Lessons Learned” for more on Buck and lessons).  Eddie’s moving forward and if the narrative continues, he will be the one there to help Buck pick up the pieces of his broken heart. Since several questions remain regarding Buck’s mental state, hopefully they will all be answered in season 6.  

Will he finally go back to therapy? Will he face his issues of abandonment while he’s in sessions with Dr. Copeland?  Will Buck and Eddie finally talk about all of their shared traumas?  Will he have a mental breakdown?  Will it take him almost dying in front of Eddie for them to confess their love for each other?  How will Eddie react if Buck has a breakdown and needs the same kind of attention Buck gave him in 5x13 and 5x14?  Only the showrunners, writers and producers know the answers to those questions.

[fazedlight]

re: weird trauma reversal and also being late to the fandom

i was also quite late to the fandom and one of the things i’ve noticed is that i think in some ways you can tell when someone bingewatched the series after it was complete, or close to when it was complete, and especially in terms of the relationships people have with the characters.

i think one of the biggest examples of this is james - i kind of feel like a lot of the people who are more open to the fact that guardiancorp happened or felt there was ‘potential there’ etc are people who would have watched seasons 1 & 2 in particular play out in real time over the course of 2 years, so they had time to form more of an acquaintance and acceptance of what his character was intended to be, whereas i think if you watched all of the seasons back to back to back over a matter of weeks james’ behaviour is so erratic across the course of seasons 1 - 4 that he just seems kind of like a manipulative jerk because suddenly the kara -> lucy -> kara -> guardian -> luthors are evil -> lena is hot comes right on the heels of each other in a way that it wouldn’t have if you were watching the series in weekly episodes.

but in specific relation to what you were saying about cheapening kara’s traumas, i think bingewatching makes that cheapening effect even worse and that it also has an impact on how people see kara and lena actually, because - similar to how it’s hard to see james as the character the showrunners intended when you binge watch - when you speedrun through s3 - s4 the inconsistency with kara’s character and her traumas makes some of her flaws, like the self-righteousness and the hypocrisy, seem even worse in a way because it’s so much more compressed? it’s a lot easier to see how it must have seemed to lena when she looked back in retrospect and revisited their friendship after the trauma of lex because the flipflopping in one episode to the next isn’t over the course of a week or a season.

(i thought the lex trauma comment in one of your earlier posts was really astute and it resonated with me so much - while there’s plenty of balanced fiction and also fiction that completely ignores that lena did Bad Things, on the other side of it I really don’t think a lot of lena’s antis really account for the fact that yeah, she completely went haywire and yeah, it was pretty ooc, but at the same time the writers did try to set the stage for it - she lived through making a morally grey decision involving a once beloved family member and then having the rug pulled out from under her immediately after, and right on the heels of some very erratic behaviour by kara. lena sitting in her office feeling used that kara only wanted her to use her as a source always gets me, like her doubts of their friendship weren’t just seeded by supergirl/kara being two people alone.)

sorry for the long comment! i try so hard to be a normal person but some of the things you say just really resonate with me, and then… this happens. congrats on completing diat as well and excited for your wips!!!

Yeah!! That makes sense. Having started the show in early 2022 and binging it, I have no sense of the pacing at all. Someone (maybe you?) brought up in another ask that the stuff with Kara’s DNA in S6 came up during covid era, when talk about DNA replication was pretty common on the news, which made it especially odd in the show that they treated it like a single-opportunity thing. I would never have thought of the covid context, since I wasn't watching then.

It makes sense that bingewatching would make that trauma reversal aspect even worse! I hadn’t thought of that. Also, ouch, the rift buildup being worse tears my heart out - it was already pretty heartwrenching from my point of view, speed running through the series!

... also, god, waiting an entire summer between S4 and S5 would’ve killed me 🤣

I feel pretty lucky in that I haven’t come across too many anti-Lena or anti-Kara folks (yet?). I just really don’t understand it… they’re just both such compelling characters. They’re both flawed, and they’re both trying to do the right thing, and they’re both trying to deal with their traumas, and I can’t imagine reading stuff for this ship without loving them both.

(Thank you for the comment, please never apologize!! I love reading these! It’s not like I’m normal either 🤣)

[zalrb]

So I’ve read a lot of Jax/Tara fics and there are some (specifically where they get to have a happy ending after s6) where Jax and Tara each separately make these grandiose speeches in front of the club or Colette and basically share their entire story and use a lot of dialogue to explain what they mean to each other publicly.

But I’ve always felt (and think from what we’ve been shown) that they’re so much more private about the way they feel for each other. And that they mostly show their protective/possessive instincts through physical behavior or quick lines to others.

But at the same time it seems that only the brothers who were there during their high school phase really understand how deep their love goes so maybe the writer wanted them to reconnect and show their love for each other by telling everyone but I still feel like its so ooc to deliberately say those things rather than like overhear what they share with each other or see it.

What do you think?

But at the same time it seems that only the brothers who were there during their high school phase really understand how deep their love goes?

What makes you say that? And who does that not include? I can only think of Juice and I'm thinking Chibbs? Then again later seasons SOA is fuzzier for me so if they've added one or two new members in, like, season 6 I won't remember them, haha.

But I definitely think it would be ooc for them to express their love for each other that way publicly like you said, it's mostly in gestures like when they get married and Jax nods his head at Tara for her to take off his SOA ring and replace it with his wedding band

or Tara simply saying

(and again people saying Maggie Siff is a bad actress, the way her eyes harden at the end of that sentence??)

or Jax threatening Clay for the way he spoke about Tara

even Tara showing up before church starts to declare that she's basically his ride or die

the implications of that are huuuuge, this is their sacred space, their members only space where I don't remember seeing any woman be in except for that picture of Gemma and John and she walked in and declared she wasn't leaving him in front of everybody.

Like they know the depths of their love when Jax is out for blood when Tara's hand gets smashed and they're like yeaaahhh you can't be anywhere near this right now because you're way too angry and he just yells WHAT THE HELL DO YOU EXPECT? Or even when Salazar holds Tara hostage and he just exclaims "He's going to hurt her!" and they're like OK Jax, come on, come, you need to calm down.

They call her his wife before they're even officially married.

And honestly, there's been only one real speech between them in private

even when he proposes I don't really consider that a "speech"

I think the rest of it is like two sentences "you've given me a beautiful son and you've taken Abel as your own" (paraphrasing)

It's very much about the actions

and them definitively saying "I love you" or "don't go anywhere" or "I'm here" I think

Like if he were to say something publicly to the club, like if they were talking about what to do with Tara when her entire plan is revealed and Jax insists that nothing happens to her and maybe Tig gets in his face a little bit about it, that's when I can see a "She's mine" and that would be a silencer, I don't think anything else would be necessary.

[randomfoggytiger]

I'm really starting to think that the IVF conversation/ask happened early 1998! Chinga could have been Scully's vacation where she decides she wants to ask Mulder to be the father... Classic sibling rivalry; Bill since he and Tara had a baby in Dec-97/Jan-98, and mourning the loss of Emily- thinking she could have been a secret child of Melissa's, Charlie supposedly having son(s) as referenced in Home. The ask happening before Fight The Future... Mulder had found Scully's ovum in '97 and had it immediately tested. She wouldn't want to wait very long from the moment she knew about it... I'm compelled!

There was a fic about that, I think!

Scully takes a vacay to clear her head after Mulder tells her about the ova. It diverts how I interpreted the episode; but it was a great read.

Wait a sec... *rummages* Can't find it on this short notice (I didn't name it appropriately in my docs, UGH.) Does anyone else know what it's from? I think a large body of work?

But anyway! I used to be big on the IVF in S5 thing (got a few? fics about it stashed); but it, unfortunately, made more sense (to me) in S6 because they were grounded often during the Kersh times (and flying wasn't/isn't? recommended while going through IVF, I think.) And the "doesn't want it to come between us" is perfect after FTF and The Beginning and Drive when both were crawling back from the immense mess up that Mulder did in ignoring Scully's FTF reiteration (The Beginning.)

If I were to set it in S5, I'd follow @dreamingofscully's theory-- post All Souls (resolution for grief/guilt on Scully's part); and failure before The End (because Scully would feel even more hurt by Diana-- she would have been viewing herself as a "failure"-- whereas Mulder was oblivious to how threatened she felt. And Diana capitalized on all that emotion.)

[disco-tea]

I really, really don’t like how hard they tried to make Spike look like an asshole a lot of the time during mid-late S6, it felt like such a regression of his character development up until that point. It was like everything that happened in S5 and early S6 meant nothing.

YEAH. Right. Another thing about S6. We’re just all in the S6 slander lmao. but yeah. And again, I’m sorry, I really do get that some people like S6 and say it works, but it’s very hard for me *personally* not to read between the lines when it comes to the way that arc went. Because it doesn’t feel like the natural progression…at least not *exactly* anyway. I don’t vibe with it because I can literally tell that the reason they did it wasn’t because they were being nice to the part of the audience who shipped them. Because I can literally see that the way they have them act doesn’t line up with previous characterization. I can literally tell when it’s trying to paint Spike in a negative light because they don’t like him or they don’t want the audience to like him/him and Buffy. I can definitely feel the divide in the writers room.

And yeah, I mean don’t get me wrong, Spike is a bitch (it’s a part of his charm) but it’s the ridiculous heel turn they have him make halfway through. He goes from thoughtful and understanding and genuinely just wanting to be there for Buffy BECAUSE HER DYING HAD A HUGE IMPACT ON HIM to pretty much a jerk most of the time. It definitely felt like they went out of their way most of the time (after Tabula Rasa anyway) to make him seem like an ass.