#teterophilia

[cvmrag]

MINORS DNI

Cw: Merperson (has a dick but otherwise nonspecified), non.con

Thinking about a merperson that lives in the pools of a cave system.

Exploring a cave, coming across a series of connected pools.

Deciding to take a quick dip in a steaming one after your long walk through the cave system.

Stripping down, leaving your clothes folded on the side before lowering yourself into the still water.

Quickly drifting off in the warm, relaxing pond.

Partially waking to the sound of water lapping against the side of the pool. Relaxing, still half asleep from the warmth surrounding you. Not noticing when it seems to grow cooler between your legs.

Jumping at the sudden feeling of cold hands gripping your thighs. Looking down you see too large eyes, sharp teeth and webbed fingers. All of it pressed close against your naked form.

Both of you stilling, waiting to see what the other will do. Still caught in a half awake fugue that you couldn't seem to shake, staring at the creature between your legs.

Soft underbelly scales rubbing over you when you start to shift away.

Slowly bracing your arms on the side of the pool and begining to lift yourself out. Its claw tipped fingers leaving a trail of goosebumps in their wake as you slide from its grip.

Almost half way out of the pool when you stop sliding out, perched on the brim of the stone basin. Once again freezing in place when strong hands tighten around your calves. The sudden, firm pressure holding you in place while it too begins rising from the water, a soft cloud of steam rolling off it.

Feeling the change from chilled skin to smooth scales gliding against your quickly overheating flesh. Claws gently scratching up your legs to settle back on your thighs.

Eye to eye with you, easing in between your now spread legs. Gently spreading them wider to allow the large form to press closer still.

Carefully reaching forward to brush the back of its webbed fingers over the damp skin of your cheekbone. Then down to your jaw, then chin. Tilting your face from side to side, inspecting its docile prey.

A tapered and finned tail coiling around your ankles and up to your knees in a loose hold. The cool scales a stark contrast to the heat of the water. To the heat building in you.

Now completely restrained and at the merpersons mercy.

Its other hand starting to brush against your exposed skin, forcing you to keep eye contact while it explores your exposed, still dripping skin. Leaving goosebumps in its wake while tracing over your neck, shoulders, arms, chest, sides. Everything it can reach is caressed, squeezed, all while the sinuous tail holds you in place.

Breathing heavier and squirming in the unyielding hold when its face shifts closer to yours, grip tightening on your chin and hip. Using its hold to pull you back into the pool until everything below your shoulders is submerged again. Eagerly moving closer still. Chilled skin against your chest, even colder scales against your hips, between your legs.

Its soft underbelly scales causing you to buck up against its purposeful touch. Too lost in the sensations to notice the building undulations in the scales pressing into your twitching skin.

Rolling your hips against it whe sharp teeth scrape over your neck. Claws lightly brush your nipples. A tongue spreading slime over your collarbone. All distracting you from its real purpose.

Until something small, almost tongue like in size and mobility was pressing at you. Tilting up against the feeling, lining your hole up with the small protrusion. Gasping and scrambling at its shoulders when it presses in, gently wiggling and applying pressure to work itself deep inside you.

It keeps filling you further and further with a member that continues to grow in girth and length until you're stretched further than you thought possible.

The entire time the appendage doesn't stop its insistent wriggling and is rubbing against your oversensitive walls until you can't focus on anything other than its cool flesh and the heat pooling in your belly.

Thats why it takes you a minute to realize there seems to be more hands gripping your sensitive flesh than should be possible. You feel something wrapping around your nipples, reach down and caressing the stretched edge of your hole, toying between your legs, making you twitch and moan. Something slick pushing against your lips, something else wrapping around your throat.

It seems like someone else had dibs on using you next.

It starts holding you in place for the other merperson who begins rutting against you in earnest. The impossibly large cock is thrusting in and out mercilessly, completely uncaring for you bodies limits while its busy seeking its peak inside your now sloppy hole.

Another scaly body presses up against your side and you feel its slippery pouch humping against your side before it lowers its head to suck at your nipples.

That's all it takes to push you over the edge and you writhe and shake in their strong grips. They continue to use your pliant body until the one inside you is cumming too. Filling you with a strange, thick seed that almost feels like a bunch of tiny fish eggs.

Before you have time to worry too much about that the merperson at your side is already pushing their pouch up against the mess between your legs. Running it up and down, ignoring your overstimulated whimpers, until you saw multiple tiny tentacles begin to push through a near invisible opening.

This was going to be a long night...

This has been sitting in my drafts for a while, so I sort of gave up on the end. Might revisit this though...

Lmk if I missed a cw

[honest-moth-of-silver-grove]

Mothmom's Current Monster/Cryptid/Creature Masterlist (As of 01.21.24)

Key:

HC = Headcanons (most asks)

OS = One Shots, Ficlets, Drabbles (stand-alone pieces longer than bullets)

CS = Longform & Chapter Stories

CYOA = Choose Your Own Adventure (parts where Reader, s/o, makes different actions to appeal to different, separate characters)

Matchups = Character Matchups for Different Fandoms (readers get paired with a character based on their personality)

Hot! = Adult/NSFW Content

😈🧚 Monsters/Cryptids/Aliens/Creatures (Exophilia) 👾👽

HC: Yandere!Nokken x Female!Reader

HC: How would one go about getting Mothman’s attention?

HC: Female!Reader & Meeting/First Date w/ a Merman

HC: General (Non-Media Specific) Vampire x Reader Headcanons

[monsters-are-valid]

Mermay is great and all, but the potential for more monster art challenges seems largely untapped.

Octaurber or Orctober, Nekovember, Dridercember..

We as a community could do more, you know?

[sunshineler]

34

34. What are your top 5 most fuckable monsters?

god ok so

Vampires

Demons

Lycans

Tarkatans (MK-specific species)

Ghosts

my honourable mention is very specifically embodiments of the void/eldritch monstrosities with human personas because I really need the human element but fuck if everything else about creatures like that isn’t hot as hell

[cleaverqueer]

OP wants to fuck monsters but go off I guess

[1001scoganmusings]

Thoughts of you consume me

Warnings: [18+], glory hole kink, oral, brief mentions of vaginal sex, teterophilia

What!? Black hat discovering he might have feelings for Flug in the middle of fucking someone else? More likely than you think babes.

Word count: 3.3k

Minors for the love of god plz stay away

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Black hat looked at the business card in his hand then up at the neon sign that read pleasure palace in big bright red letters as it flashed on and off above him.

It was a private club who solely catered to high ranking villains only. You could only get in if you had been invited or were brought as a guest.

They were pretty hard to find considering the location changed from week to week. This insured absolute secrecy not only for the patrons but also the staff.

He had heard about this place from a business associate of his and had been told it was great for, letting off steam. He pocketed the card placing it in one of the hidden pockets of his coat as he walked up the front steps pulling on the brass handle of the door and walked in.

His footsteps clicked against the pristine flooring that was polished white marble with a gold trim.

He heard soft chattering as he walked through the lobby full of other villains waiting to get in.

Some of them were buyers from him and not even high ranking. The nerve to even claim to be he thought.

Delicate roses cut from ruby were scattered along the marble columns. Emerald cut in to exquisite leaves and vines that spiraled down the length of the column complimenting the dark red walls behind them.

Along the walls were Grecian paintings in golden frames. The paintings showed star crossed lovers or forbidden romances such as Eros and psyche. Classy but maybe a bit too over kill thought black hat as he passed by them.

A thin and lanky werewolf rushed over to greeted him. “Good evening lord black hat.” He said giving a polite bow. “If we had known you’d be coming we would’ve had someone greet you upon entering our fine establishment.”

“It’s fine,” Black hat said waving away anymore apologies the wolf might have. “ -just lead the way.”

“Right.” The werewolf said uttering a nervous laugh. “Please right this way.”

He could feel the indignant and jealous stares from the other guests. Angry that they had not been treated with the same level of respect.

But really he didn’t see why he needed to be checked in seeing as he was the highest ranking villain there.

Ridiculous really. The werewolf led him through the mahogany double doors to a huge room where people were dining and drinking. The werewolf bowed one last time leaving black hat on his own.

Inside up above a large crystal chandelier hung from the ceiling reflecting the soft candle light from the tables giving the room a romantic feel to it. Soft music played in the background as men and women of all kinds sat at tables drinking and smoking. Flirting with one another trying to gain attention from the patrons.

He saw a gargoyle man heatedly kissing an incubus woman in one of the corner booths.

His strong arms wrapped around her waist as she ground her hips into his.

Their limbs tangled around one another making it hard to tell where one ended and one began.

Further in a minator stood in front of a large glass tank with a love stricken expression on his face as a mermaid with pale blue skin and black eyes blew heart bubbles at him from underwater.

She batted her lashes at him coquettishly. The scales of her tail reflecting the room’s warm light giving it a dazzling shimmering effect.

He passes by a group of scantily clad werecat women that were already entertaining it seemed.

A goblin sat in a secluded corner of the room on a loveseat with his head thrown back and was moaning softly as two of the werecat women had their heads in his lap.

Each massaging one side of his large balls in the palm of their hands while simultaneously running their tongues up and down his shaft, purring as they did so. He brought his head up to look down just as one of them took the tip in to her mouth as the other laved at one of his balls. His big hands tangled in their hair carful of their sensitive ears as the other women kissed on his mouth and neck. One of them caught black hat staring and winked at him. Her jade green eyes playful as she threw him a flirtatious fanged smile. He paid her no mind and kept walking to the desk in the back of the room.

A pixie woman with tawny brown skin greeted him as he arrived. She wore a dress that looked as if it was made out of delicate white butterfly wings that accentuated her own translucent gossamer wings.

Her beautiful opal eyes even more striking against her green eyelashes.

She smiled at him dimples showing as she tucked a lose piece of her green hair behind her pointed ear revealing a golden ear cuff encrusted with rubies.

It ran from the tip of her ear all the way down to her earlobe.

“Hello Lord Black Hat.” she said in a high cheery voice also bowing her head politely, her Scottish accent thick.

“I am Mrs. Demir. How may I be of service to you this fine evening?”

“I was told there were fine entertainments to be had here.” Her eyes glittered with mischief as he spoke.

“Oh yes we have all kinds here.” she smiled at blackhat, showing a full set of small razor sharp teeth. Her mouth stretched thin at the corners making it look as if her skin didn’t fit her body quite right. As if it were too small for her. She was in his opinion horrifyingly beautiful. The kind of woman he might try to bed any other night. “What per say were you wanting sir?”

“Something private.” He emphasized the last word.

“All out rooms are private sir. Its what makes our establishment the best.” she said trying her best to sound reassuring.

“No,” he said correcting her. “- I mean I prefer for this encounter to remain completely anonymous for both parties.” Black hat wasn’t in the mood for fake pleasantries tonight. He wanted to fuck and get out as soon as possible.

“Oh, of course my mistake sir. Forgive me for misunderstanding.” She said flustered at having gotten such an important customers request wrong. She quickly continued on trying to cover up her mistake. “Will this be an overnight visit or-“

“No I will be leaving right after.” He said gruffly sliding a hefty wad of cash to her across the desk.

“I see.” she said thoughtfully as she opened the register and deposited the money in to it. Her thin long fingers reaching under the desk an pulling out a key card. “Then if I may, I suggest room 27. They have such compliments from their regulars. I think they’re exactly what your looking for.”

She gave him instructions to go on through the double doors and up the flight of stairs to the 2nd floor. Once there she instructed him to be sure to only enter the second to last stall once he was inside the room.

Black hat did as he was told going through another set of mahogany double doors and up another set of stairs. The inside was much larger that it looked from the outside. He supposed it was part of the enchantment that was placed on the building.

He walked down the hallway following the numbers 17, 18, 19, he passed a couple who looked as if they just couldn’t be bothered to wait till they were inside their room.

A woman, human it looked like with her dress hiked up panties moved to the side, and a tall hulking Sphinx man who was wildly driving in to her.

Her hands and face pressed up against the wall as one of the spinx’s clawed tipped hands that was wrapped entirely around her waist and was he pulling her back on to his cock making wet squelching noises as he did. His other hand held up her leg gripping the back of her knee. The angle letting him drive deeper in to her sopping wet cunt. Juices running down her leg as her body shook from the force of his thrusts. His wings expanding each time he bottomed out. Her cries of ecstasy echoing in the quiet hallway. 25, 26, 27. Thank hell he thought done with seeing others in the throws of passion. He scanned the key card through the card scanner and pushed open the black door to room 27 hurriedly walking inside. He heard the soft click of the door closing behind him echoing through the room.

The room was bathed in a dim neon pink light that lined the ceiling giving the room an eerie yet seductive air about it. He had half expected it to be dingy and filthy but to his surprise it was relatively clean. Not a very common thing for places like this but a very welcome change.

He passed by a single sink and mirror followed by urinals that lined the walls on both sides as he went further in to the room till he came to two stalls in the corner. He could hear a heart beat on the other side indicating that there was indeed someone in there.

He opened the door to the unoccupied stall as he was instructed and went in locking it behind him. There was a sign on the stall wall written in black cursive letters that read knock and insert here with an arrow pointing to a hole in the wall.

Excitement ran through him. He’d never tried a glory hole before. He undid his belt and fly pulling out his 11in cock already half hard. He sighed softly giving himself a couple of firm strokes feeling himself harden in his hand. It had been awhile since he let himself indulge in the pleasures of the flesh. His schedule was so booked lately that there just didn’t seem to be any time for it. The last straw being when he started to imagine what Flug would look like on his knees with his lips wrapped around his cock as he gagged on it during a meeting with a very important client. The thought shocking him enough to reschedule and rush to the bathroom to take care of his problem. He knew right there and then that something had to be done before he acted out of foolishness. No good would come of having liaisons with employees. None.

Black hat knocked before sliding his erect cock through the hole. He let his hands rest on the wall in front of him as he waited. A warm hand on the other side took hold of him and kissed the tip. The warmth of their palm making him sigh as they rhythmically stroked him from base to tip.

He shivered as warm soft lips trailed up and down his shaft leaving hot open mouthed kisses in their wake. Tongue occasionally peaking out to trace up and down all the veins and ridges on his cock.

Black hat let his head fall back as he felt the tension in his whole body melt away with each caress of their hand and lips. This. This is what black hat had been craving, no needing. Someone to just worship his cock. No questions or useless polite talk of any kind. Just someone who gave him exactly what he asked for with out any hassle or emotional crap.

He groaned low in his throat as the tip of their tongue teased the underside of his cock making it twitch for them. Maybe it really had been too long if they were so easily able to pull these reactions from him black hat thought to himself.

He didn’t need to see to know that pre was dribbling out from his slit in thick rivulets. He felt their tongue lap at his leaking slit and lick up the cum that leaked down the sides of his shaft making sure to leave him clean and shiny with spit. The image of Flug down on his knees lapping up his cum came to mind. The image making him utter a choked moan. Why the fuck was he thinking about Flug right now?! What the hell was wrong with him?!

He shook his head trying to clear his mind but again his ridiculous mind brought up the image of Flug on the other side of the wall on his knees swirling his tongue slowly around the head teasing his slit with the pointed tip of his tongue.

Black hat bit his lip to keep from moaning as warm breath wafted over his cock driving him crazy with want. Maybe not seeing had been a mistake.

“Fuck.” he gasped, his hips gave small thrusts trying to get them to get on with it. But to his dismay they just continued their onslaught of tantalizing and teasing touches. Black hat tried hard to picture someone else. Anyone else, but it was no use. No matter who he imagined his mind kept turning back to Flug. He no longer was trying to fight his traitorous mind about Flug. Letting it win in what it wanted to see.

He pictured Flug closing those pouty pink lips of his around the head and bobbing in earnest, massaging the underside with his tongue just as they were.

Fuck picturing his pathetic and clumsy scientist doing something so perverse, so delectably sinful, was turning him on like nothing else ever had.

He’d need to revisit why later. But for now he threw it to the dogs and let his mind wander back to his fantasy.

His legs shook at how rough imaginary flug was being. Tugging on him just right with every pull back making sure to hollow his cheeks giving just the perfect amount of suction. It was pure bliss.

Drool dripped down black hat’s chin as he could hardly contain his noises anymore. God it was humiliating to be heard like this but at the same time so exhilarating. He could let go and not worry about anything because this person would never know who he was. It was maddening to him how relinquishing control during sex was turning him on so much as if he was a young demon again getting his dick wet for the first time. He wasn’t used to giving up control seeing as he had no one he could really trust. Not true his mind whispered going back to Flug. As a demon it was just unheard of for something like that to happen. But then again when had he ever followed demon societal norms.

He heard an inhale from the other side as felt the head of his cock slip into their throat wishing with all his being it was Flug. The in human roar he let out echoed in the empty bathroom. Tentacles sprung up from his body slithering up the wall and over the floor as they gaged around him. He pictured Flug looking up at him with those big doe eyes filled with worship and adoration. Gaging his reactions to see what best pleased him. And god was Flug good at pleasing black hat, even if black hat never acknowledged it.

Flug kept going till all of him was sheathed in his throat. His legs shook from the effort it took to just stand still and just enjoy the wonderful wet heat around him. It was taking all his self control to not just phase through the wall and just start face fucking whoever was on the other side.

Flug hollowed his cheeks pulling back torturously slow, lewd slurping noises sounding too loud in the quiet of the room. He kept going till only the tip of black hat’s cock was in his mouth before going back down taking him all the way down again and again and again.

He let his forehead rest against the wall as the claws on his hands dug in to it leaving deep scratch marks. He closed his eyes pressing himself as close to the wall as he possibly could surrendering to the talented mouth on the other side all the while imagining it was his idiot scientist.

Fuck it felt good. Too good. Black hat could feel himself nearing his end already and the session had only just begun. His cock feeling as though it was melting from all the wondrous attention it was receiving. How Flug’s tight hot throat was squeezing him just right every time he swallowed around him.

Was it simply the anonymity of this encounter making him feel this good? Or was it his fantasy of Flug so attentively sucking his cock? He wasn’t sure and at the moment could be bothered to care as they moaned around his cock. The vibrations threatening to send him over the edge when they suddenly pulled off.

He let out a menacing growl that reverberated throughout the room. He felt them line themselves up with his cock and thrust back on to it. Their walls fluttering around him as they tried to accommodate his monstrous size. Black hat waisted no time and began thrusting into the tight channel.

The image of Flug laying flat on his stomach sprawled out on black hat’s bed. Black hat’s hands on either side of Flug’s head as he drove in to him wildly from behind making Flug scream his name. Oh how he’d fuck Flug, fuck him until flug begged him to stop. And even then he might not.

Fuck he was close, so close. The flimsy stall wall shaking with each rough thrust. Liquid fire pooled in his belly ready to burst at any moment. Hurried wet slapping noises and muffled moans came from the other side as their body suddenly clenched down hard on his length. His eyes slamming shut from the intensity of the pleasure. The acrid tang of blood filled his mouth as he bit his lip to conceal his voice as he thrust in a few more times before he too came. Hilting in them one final time before stilling his hips as he shot thick hot spirts of cum in to them, a soft whisper of Flug’s name falling from his lips. Black hat’s thighs trembled as their walls milked him so deliciously.

All that could be heard now was his own labored breathing. Black hat let his softening cock slip from their body. Tearing off a few pieces of toilet paper from the holder and wiping himself clean before tucking himself back in and zipping up his pants.

He exited the stall and walked out of the room. Black hat snapped his fingers and teleported himself back to the mansion, not particularly in the mood to see people rutting against one another like animals.

As he walked the halls back to his office he accidentally bumped too hard in to Flug as he turned a corner knocking the man down to the ground.

“Sorry boss I didn’t see you there.” He said in a nervous tone as he looked up at black hat.

There they were again. The disgusting thoughts. His mind telling him to pin Flug to the ground and fuck him till he couldn’t walk properly.

“Boss?” Flug said confused by black hat’s silence and intense stare.

Flug’s voice bring him out of his thoughts. “Stay out of my sight you pathetic worm.” He said as viscously as he could walking right over Flug and continuing on to his office. Keeping his desires in check was going to be a lot harder than he thought.

[honest-moth-of-silver-grove]

About Me

Greetings!

Hey, I’m a new imagine blog here on tumblr, working to practice my writing skills and have some fun doing it.

Here you will find a collection of headcanons, imagines, one-shots, and maybe even multi-chapter stories (one day).

Current Hyperfixations: Castlevania & Voltron

Note: When requsting, use the askbox and name the character you want and the scanrio you’re thinking of. Please specify whether you want a headcanon answer (bullet-points) or a imagine answer (short blurb in paragraph format). If you do not specify which type, I will take the liberty of choosing one for you.

If you’re thinking of a monster, do be specific in your descriptions.

To read my complete list of rules and see what fandoms I write for, please click here: [x]

Sincerly,

Mothmom

[monsters-are-valid]

My horny ass could not play Dark Souls

[swervesselfinserts]

So heres my commission sheet! Hopefully this isnt to expensive?? (with paypal btw!)

Please DM me if interested < 33

additional characters are half of the original price, if that makes sense, but don't worry, just ask me if your confused or have any questions!

Things i will draw:

Self Ships

OC X OC

OC X Canon

Canon X Canon 

Pastel Gore

SFW Teterophilia /  Xenophilia

Some Anthros (Depends)

(just ask if unsure!)

Things i wont draw

NSFW

Fetish/Kinks

Celebrities 

(just ask if unsure!)

[feralfux]

What is your favorite monster?

What is your favorite monstrous kink?

What got you into teterophilia?

Who was your first monster crush?

What is your opinion on monsters marking their territory?

Describe the ideal monster tongue?

Who is your current monster crush?

What is your favorite piece of monster media?

If you could have any monster traits (forked tongue, bat wings, spiked tail, etc) what would they be?

What is your favorite monster-related trope?

Do you own any fantasy sex toys?

What is your hottest monster fantasy?

Do you like dressing up slutty or scary for Halloween?

What is the hottest aquatic monster?

If society did not care, what kind of body modifications would you get?

Do you want to fuck monsters or be the monster?

What is the weirdest thing you’ve masturbated to?

Would you prefer a monster on a leash or bound at a monster’s mercy?

Describe the ideal monster vulva?

What makes a quality monster?

What is the hottest horror movie?

What is your opinion on belly bulges?

What is the weirdest thing you’ve masturbated with?

Do you prefer a gentle giant or a violent beast?

Cat girls: are they monsters? Discuss.

What is the hottest humanoid monster?

What is your opinion on size difference?

Who’s your favorite monster porn artist?

Choose one: teeth or claws?

How big is too big?

What is your opinion on tentacles?

If you were a demon, what would someone need to put in your summoning circle?

Describe the ideal monster cock?

What are your top five most fuckable monsters?

What is your opinion on breeding?

Who is the sexiest horror movie villain?

What are your favorite monster blogs?

How much cum is too much cum?

Do you watch hentai?

Describe the ideal monster gangbang?

What do you think is the most underrated monster?

What is the hottest kind of demon (besides succubus/incubus)?

What is your opinion on aphrodisiacs or sex pollen?

What is your favorite monster-related kink?

What is the hottest Dungeons and Dragons monster?

What is the least sexy monster?

What is your opinion on consensual non-consent?

Humans: are we the real monsters? Discuss.

Do you prefer spit or cum?

What is the hottest cryptid (bigfoot, mothman, etc)?

What is your opinion on being chased or hunted?

What is your favorite kind of monster porn?

What is your opinion on vore?

What is a common monster porn trope that turns you off?

Who is the sexiest Japanese movie monster (Godzilla, Mothra, etc)?

What is your guiltiest pleasure?

Describe your most fucked-up fantasy?

What is your opinion on ovipositors?

Do you prefer a tame or feral monster?

Furries: are they monsters? Discuss.

What non-genital monster part turns you on the most?

Describe a romantic fantasy with a monster?

What monster is totally overrated?

What is the hottest high fantasy monster (dragon, orc, etc)?

What is your opinion on sexual gore?

What is the hottest flying monster?

Describe your ideal set of monster teeth?

Who is the sexiest classic movie monster (Frankenstein, Swamp Thing, etc)?

What is your dream sex toy?

[sunshineler]

6 and 31 for the asks

6. Describe the ideal monster tongue?

oh god okay so long, for starters, and flexible. kinda like venom but not as uncomfortably large. forked tongues are hot but not my ideal so not forked but definitely more pointed than human tongues are. strong.

31. What is your opinion on tentacles?

I love them tbh 10/10 but within reason?? ideally there is some sort of humanoid monster attached to the tentacles but they’re so good from a teterophilia perspective but also a tickle fetish perspective because. fuck. guys. fuck

[monsters-are-valid]

I love the Area 51 meme. I’ve been wanting to clap alien cheeks for years, and now I know I’m not alone.

[monsters-are-valid]

Monster under the bed? Bitch I want to be under that monster in my bed ha hA HA

[monsters-are-valid]

Monster pitch:

Slime boy, but instead of the usual translucent goo, he’s made of ice cream. Cookie dough boyfriend? Hard yes. Mint chocolate chip boyfriend? Two enthusiastic thumbs up. Cookies and Cream boyfriend? Uh, yes-frickin-please!

[monsters-are-valid]

Living with a centaur in a studio apartment is tough. The furniture has to be spaced out enough so that they can manuver through the living room, ground floor apartments only (stairs are far too much of a pain when you have four legs), and of course you can’t share a bed. Even so, when you lean up against their equine flank while you two watch a movie on the floor, you know that they are worth all the hassle.

[monsters-are-valid]

The weather was getting hotter, which meant that your cold-blooded Naga lover would spend a lot more time outside backing in the sun. There’s no better way for you to get a tan than sitting snuggled up in their coils.