#thank you jesus for answering our prayers

[my-name-is-boneless]

BYE BITCH

[lady-perpetua]

GOD IS GOOD & ALL THINGS ARE DONE ACCORDING TO HIS WILL!!!!

I’m so happy to announce that my little brother, who we were told wouldn’t get into Seattle Children’s Hospital for an entire month, was successfully checked in at the Hospital under 2 hours and will now have the much needed help he needs. 

I can’t tell you guys how hard this trial has been. My Dad’s faith was pushed to its limit, my Mom’s sanity was pushed to its breaking point, and last night I broke down crying as I prayed for my family to get the help we needed for my Brother. 

And guess what? Today our burden has been lifted off our shoulders and we will finally get answers and help for my little brother that we’ve been praying for. I want to thank my brothers and sisters in Christ who’ve prayed for us and who’ve kept my brother in their prayers. All things are possible through Christ Jesus. Glory be to God!!! 

[starlightbooklove]

Ok, I finally saw Journey to Bethlehem and I can't begin to express how much I loved it, I'm a very difficult person to like a full musical, which is why movies like west side story and in the heights I only liked a few songs, like as movies in general they are good, but not to my personal taste.

Furthermore, the Christian film market usually ranges from very similar, commercial and honestly boring films, to 'reinterpretations' that remove plots and things that do not go at all with the Original material So I wasn't too confident in how good the trailer looked but I was willing to give it a look, thank goodness I did.

As a Christian who was raised in the church with a Christian family, my view of religion was quite Biased by their way of looking at it Which wasn't bad, but I was focused on the religious point of view sometimes excessively, so over time as I grew up and got to know the world around me, I moved away from that, And then after I grew up I returned to wanting to learn for myself without biased opinions about the Bible and to be able to understand it and really feel what everyone said they felt.

And so I came to the conclusion that You can save your self a Lot of time, if you just read the bible as what it is: a book, full of human people with a lot of imperfections, murky, miraculous, heartbreaking, crazy, steamy and even funny (yes, I'm not lying) stories. Religion, so focused on an idea that sometimes not even the Bible itself shares, forgets the human part that fills the stories, which is not very described in it either, but that one can easily interpret.

And thanks to this, criticism of Christians is very well founded on several occasions, and many people have the mistaken idea that the Bible is a 'holy book of holy people'.

That there is nothing more false, the book is holy or is different, unique and/or sacred because of how it was written and because of the stories that happen in it And how accompanied by prayer and the real desire to want to know, you can learn a lot no matter how many times you read it, not because of the people who lived them.

Who were they, let me tell you the test of God's patience.

Do you know Moses? The dude who divided the sea (by God's guidance), did you knew that (this one's funny), thanks to the people he brought out of Egypt after the plagues and that he have to spend 40 years with them in the desert? 🙃 no, it's not a joke and no, it's not an interpretation, literally thanks to the almost constant disobedience of the Israelis after being liberated they were punished with that, and the worst thing is that God had reasons, and I'll give you an example of that, these people decided to worship a damn golden cow that they built Because Moses had taken a long time to return from talking to God (when he went to look for the commandments ironically) less than a year after being freed by God from slavery.

Moses broke the first tables of commandments out of anger, and had to go look for them again, I repeat, no, I'm not playing, this is how it happened in the Bible And it was not only for this reason that they had to stay, it was a list of things that these people did, having as a testimony and example just by being free, still had Incredible faith problems.

The generation that left Egypt never saw or lived in the promised land, the only one who saw it out of mercy was Moses, but it was the descendants who managed to enter the promised land.

Haaa, bet you didn't knew that..

So, as you can see, no, not holy and/or perfect people at all. You might wonder, what does this have to do with the movie? And I will answer you, sorry, i got inspired, but the thing is, this is basically the context of why I liked it so much.

Journey to Bethlehem, it is the story of the birth of Jesus if we remove the religion and the holy holy beautiful peacefull look that some churches like to sell, and start to unite our 4 neurons and think about what, humanly, those people thought and did under the context of that time With fire songs, good performances, very good acting, and Milo (I'm not going to elaborate, I'll just say that I gained a tremendous crush on this man lmao)

And I want to list my favorite points from this in the movie.

-The representation of Mary

Arguably my favorite part of the movie, like, this woman really made me feel what it must have been like for her to carry the son of God.

Because N1: Mary is painted as this woman rejoicing in the news that she will become pregnant overnight when she is engaged, not married, in a patriarchal society With around 1000 laws about what you can and cannot do and the things you cannot do are punishable by death, One of them being being pregnant or having a child out of marriage 🙃🤭 what a blessing right?

And N2: For years Mary has been said to be holy and worshiped when she probably wouldn't approve of that herself, since she grew up with scriptures that said they couldn't worship idols. And they made her an idol. Something to make clear is that the only holy human, biblically speaking, is Jesus. Mary was a virgin, not a saint, she had more children with her husband after having Jesus, she had a life beyond him.

And this movie brings that out, it makes the most of it and I love it.

It shows what a struggle it must have been for her to have such a burden on her, she was young (in those days people married young), perhaps a teenager, Yes, they were raised differently and at the end of the day he was about to get married, but still, as I said, the Bible leaves out a lot of the human factor.

It can say that it passes a beginning and an end but it does not give you the means to connect both parts In the Bible, Mary respectfully accepts the news that she is going to have a baby, and the film respects that, but Mary was human, you know the fear and absolute madness must cause that an angel to appear to you out of nowhere and tell you that you are going to have a son who is going to be savior and king and then disappear (appreciation for the angel Gabriel btw My man would be me if i was an angel lmao) How the hell do you explain that to your parents? To your fiancé, no matter how versed everyone was in the scriptures, no one, NO ONE thought Jesus was going to be born from a humble virgin, Literally part of the reason (spoiler alert lmao) Jesus was killed was because no one believed that the king they were waiting for was a simple carpenter who was born in a manger. This probably included Mary herself, certainly her parents, and much more, Joseph. And she knew it, of course she knew it, she knew it was true but she had to know how hard it was to believe it and how much trouble she could get into for being pregnant. It's kind of expected that Mary would have doubts, rightly so which is why I love love the song "mother to a savior and king" i just feel that it had to be exactly what she thought.

... Give me eyes to see

Just how I can be

Carrying your son when I need You

To carry me

...Should a miracle feel like an anchor

Bringing shame upon my family

This burden is too heavy

I need strength to be

A mother to a savior and king

... You said, "Do not fear"

So Lord, if you are here

Help me have the faith you have in me

Give me eyes to see just how I can be

Mother to a savior

When I need saving

Like aaaa Chills, literal chills And I love it because it doesn't occur to people how society must have seen Mary, we see it as a blessing because we know how it all ended, but they didn't know. And they lived in a very very different society, if everyone had found out, they would have stoned Mary, that is the reality that they don't talk much about at Christmas.

Another fact that I liked is that Mary had to travel, traveling in this time does not imply the same as traveling in that time, with her 9 months of pregnancy (Because she gave birth as soon as she arrived in Bethlehem) on a donkey 🙃🙃🙃🙃 I don't think I have to elaborate much, i love how they portrayed here. You can say people knew how things were, they were used to it, yes, but Maria had never been pregnant and no matter how adapted you are to something, You can't erase the physical challenge of traveling with a giant belly in those conditions.

And let's not even talk about the birth, where they were in the city that: it was full of soldiers seeking to kill her and her baby, they broadcast the news that they would be killing babies and pregnant mothers In search of finding her, which is why they did not find asylum and had to go to a stable.

I think with the idea of ​​☺️ ah, Jesus was born in a manger ☺️We forget that 💀 oh, Jesus was born in a manger 💀 I don't know about you, but I think that is not the ideal place to give birth And yet the representations of that are so sugar coated We literally have a song called "Silent Night" tell me, explain to me what part of giving birth where the animals and their excrement are because an entire army is chasing you trying to kill you, sounds like a peaceful night????

Another detail is that Joseph (who I am obviously going to talk about) logically had to act as midwife for Mary, because no one was with them, no one wanted to be with them, that sounds like a horror story honestly, and no, I'm not taking away from how beautiful the whole purpose of Jesus is and everything is.

I am only pointing out the facts, which are raw and very Real about a situation like this, this was the reality as it is written, the Bible leaves things out But the rawness in several acts is never lacking.

One last thing to add is that I was afraid at first that they would portray Mary as a feminist ahead (by centuries) of her time But in an annoying and very political way because of how the movie started, And that they were going to make her not want the pregnancy and make it as if they had violently forced her, thank God that didn't happen, i loved her, The actress did a tremendous job interpreting her with personality without losing the respect (that is noted in the Bible) Mary had for God and the giant task she was given, and I actually liked that twist That perhaps Mary and Joseph did not know each other before they got engaged, which would not be unusual at that time. And that Mary said at the beginning of the movie that she believed she was destined for bigger things 🙃.They give more personality to this icon that we all have of her and I love it.

-The representation of Joseph

Starting with the fact that I have a big fat crush now on Milo Mannheim thanks to him (not important at all actually)

I think everyone, whether Christian or not, knows that Joseph is a secondary character every time the story of Jesus' birth is mentioned, even invisible I dare say. And I was always curious because of how he leaves after he is born in the Bible, it is simply not mentioned again and this is why I think there is this kind of unconscious belief that Jesus only had one parental figure and that was Mary.

When this can easily be contradicted by the little information we have in the Bible; Joseph was known as Joseph the carpenter, and who ended up being a carpenter? (Flashbacks to Sabrina lmao) Jesus, No matter how holy and amazing he was, Jesus grew up having to learn things, he wasn't born knowing, and obviously Mary didn't teach him how to work with wood so it's pretty logical to think that his stepfather (idk How to call it) taught him. That even if we leave this out (which is after the birth of Jesus) Joseph was THE man ok And this is with biblical foundation, he believed Mary and decided to continue with the wedding despite how crazy it all sounded, he helped her during the trip to Bethlehem, ALONE, he had to practically attend the birth

And the film captures that so, so well, I have no words to describe how impressed and excited I was to see how they highlighted so many things that I knew because yk, they are in the Bible but I hadn't been aware of noticing before.

How difficult it must have been for him to make the decision to believe Mary (which, let's be honest, takes a lot of faith to believe something like that) To follow her, and his song, my God, his song is so good. It's perfect for showing a morally gray human decision and the way he delivered that presentation ugh I just feel from my heart that it was exactly what Joseph thought. Cause:

I'm completely torn in two

Half of me believes her,

while the other half needs proof

This was no inmaculate conception

Just the ultimate deception

Gilty to the bone we should have her stoned now

Wait don't you throw your stoned no don't yoy judge her i look into her eyes i think i love her

I just 🫠🫠🫠 Jesus Christ

You don't come out of that movie without half falling for Joseph and that's something I never imagined saying in my life lmao

It was a very human way, full of personality and commitment, to portray the character. beyond the attractiveness of both the actor and the goofy personality they gave him. They gave it this degree of seriousness and part of the story that shows very clearly what they themselves say in the film and that is that God did not choose only Mary, She couldn't do everything she had to do alone, and among those things was raising a child that was given to her overnight and that she had to carry for nine months, and that does not deviate from history even though there are those who say no, it is written but I think it needed the human interpretation for people to see it, as I feel that they need with many stories from the bible. They definitely took their liberty to create the love story and I'm not complaining, I never thought at all that there must have been a lot of love both between them and for God for them to be able to go through all of that, And I like to believe that if it was like that, the love they had for each other, because only someone who loves another person so much is willing to go through all that, cause very easily Joseph could receive confirmation from God that what Mary said was true and say well, that's not my problem, but he decided to take responsibility with her, Which shows why God chose them, so yes, it has its freedoms but I don't think it is essentially far from reality.

Herodes

O. M. GOOOOODDD.

Antonio Banderas ate with his performance because damn I could feel the arrogance, the complete pleasure that those kings had for being rich and powerful, with that man And he didn't have much screen time, despite how comical he gets at times he manages to show how dangerous Herod was.

That, they didn't show it but that man ordered babies and pregnant mothers to be killed in the end, just for fear that they would take away his throne and his power, out of complete caress. And Antonio showed a funny and iconic man but also dangerous and capable of that and, and also they gave him the best song.

And i'm not Even joking, 'good to be king' is what Disney tried (and failed) to do with "Wish", It has all the magic and that lyricism that shows rough and raw things with incredible music That sticks to you despite how bad the bad guy is, from the villain songs of Disney's 2D movies, It's at the level of "poor unfortunate souls" and the Interpretation, God It's one of the best parts of the movie, weeks go by and I still can't get it out of my head

Finally, the relationship of Mary and Joseph.

I feel that all our lives, after thousands of times telling us the story of the birth of Jesus, the relationship of Mary and Joseph never had any importance beyond their role in the birth. So I loved the representation of that here, the way they took this theme of a planned marriage, which could very easily have been a reality, Along with the human and emotional reaction that these people must have had at the time, they give life and depth to Mary and Joseph, with the pros and cons.

With how difficult it was but also how strong they must have been as a couple to carry out the huge task they had, it made me see it from a more human point of view and give more value to their relationship.

They took their liberties, there are things that are super funny and have that absurd touch, but it is a story full of a lot of respect for the source, and full of a wonderful and human interpretation of of this great story, You don't feel it is religious, because it isn't, the music isn't just there and they are all very good (something that doesn't happen with all musicals).

And it is simply beautiful, it is made with love and it shows, they took advantage of every penny of their budget and put out this piece of art that I feel everyone should see for Christmas And that I would like to tattoo permanently on my brain lmao.

Go watch it, it's absolutely worth it.

If you made it this far, thank you for reading my entire almost essay of the movie, I hope you find your Joseph in life🫶😂

[agendabymooner]

colour me your colour || toto w. x ofc (8)

Summary: Tilly Marie nearly loses faith in her passion as she refuses to listen to everyone who told her to quit. Everyone but one. And it’s the man she met years ago at a racing event she didn’t want to attend. Who would have thought that her father’s partial ownership of three brands could take her to the zone of Mercedes and meet the love of her life?

Chapter summary: How do you celebrate your best friend’s P1 and your driver’s P3 without fawning over your best friend’s boss? Hint: you can’t. OR Tilly needs to let loose and having to celebrate Daniel and Lewis’ win showed that.

Content warning: Use of explicit language, Danny Ric and Lewis Hamilton being resident pieces of shit, alcohol consumption (podium wins), Danny’s shoey

Note: WE CAN STILL FORZA THIS FERRARI BABYYYYY!!! My prayers had been answered this weekend. Enjoy xx

masterlist

viii. frisky tilly

Mercedes got the P1. As I wished quietly. 

Even at the very beginning of the season, I’ve always been confident that this was going to be Lewis’ year. He didn’t exactly hide the fact that he’s worked for it. 

It wasn’t just that; he also won his home race. So while Christian and the Red Bull crew are upset that Mercedes took the lead, I certainly am jumping up and down in joy. In secret. I will always be a Lewis supporter first and a girl in a Red Bull jacket second. 

I made sure to tell him that I’d be there as soon as my job was done for the day. By that, I meant that I need to make sure Christian and the other Red Bull personnel are recognizing Daniel’s P3 finish in public, not bitch about Mercedes getting another P1 and P2 — with Williams’ Valtteri Bottas finishing. They’ve landed on the podium.

I’m sticking with Daniel the entire time, my eyes are keeping an eye out for Christian and Vettel in case they need me. 

Waiting patiently inside the cool down room, my hand sticks out a towel in Daniel’s direction. He looks at me with a questioning smile. “Wipe off your sweat. You’ll catch a cold,” I explain.

“Mother Tilly, you’re so sweet,” he coos, but his teasing smile eventually goes away as he thanks me. “You coming out to celebrate later?” 

“Celebrate what?” I ask him, wondering if there’s a party hosted after the race. If there was, I wasn’t told. Or I’m not invited. “I don’t recall Horner telling me about a celebration.”

“Oh no,” he shakes his head before leaning in to whisper in my ear, “we don’t party with the bosses all the time. I’m talking about just anyone that isn't the boss.”

I frown, “You called me Lady Boss more than twice.” 

He wraps his arm around me, pulling me close as he looks at me with a lazy smirk, “We do like to party with powerful women. We all know what’s behind all of that dominance.”

I recoil, pushing him away with a dirty look as he bursts out of laughter. His amusement affects my own as I smile, snatching the towel he dried himself off with and smacking him with it. 

“Such a perverted thing to say, Ricciardo,” I smack him again, this time my hand lands on his chest lightly.

“Between you and Toto someone’s got to give up some control— OW JESUS, TILLY!” Daniel wheezes as I slap him again. If he couldn’t stop speaking, I suppose smacking the air out of his lungs would do it. 

The bad thing about our banter is that Lewis caught onto it. He takes my vulnerable situation as an opportunity to sling his arm around me. “Daniel, what were you trying to tell her again? Look at her, she’s so flushed!” 

“Just because you’re the winner it doesn’t mean you get to make fun of me, Lewis Hamilton,” I try to push him off but he’s giggling and has his arm around me still. Daniel does the same, putting me in between the two of them as they continue to joke around with me. 

It doesn���t take long until they’re called up to the podium to be presented with Lewis’ trophy. The crowd roars in excitement and cameras click and flash. I’m standing at the side, the sight of the top three has me squirming in happiness. Each of them has a bottle of champagne in hand and it doesn’t take Daniel, Valtteri and Lewis long to pop the cork. 

My brain begins to melt at the overwhelming excitement that takes over my body. I’m not sure if this is just a temporary thing, but I know for a fact that it feels so… euphoric. The moment I’m in the haze, my rational thoughts and actions are long forgotten.

Lewis turns to look at the side, gesturing at something that isn’t me. At first I wanted to ask if he’s speaking to me, but a pair of heavy hands settled on my hips as I heard a, “‘Scuse me, Schatz.” 

My head snaps at Toto’s direction as he walks up to celebrate with Bottas and Lewis. The Mercedes Team Principal, as if he’s anticipating it, lifted his chin up as Lewis showered him with the champagne. The alcohol wastes no time to soak his face down to his shirt, him grinning mischievously as Valteri continues to soak him too. 

My brain short circuited for a second, and my eyes involuntarily watched as Toto’s right hand ran through his now-damp hair. I haven’t even paid attention to anyone but him. Daniel had taken this as a chance to drag me to where he was once and showered me with champagne.

“Daniel! What the fu—“ but all I hear is hollering. From the crowd. From the drivers on the podium. From my family, who are standing by the front. I can see Sylvie and Stevie with their phones out, probably taking the most embarrassing photos that will last a lifetime. 

My baby blue button-up is soaking wet, I’m thankful that I never wore full makeup besides from the tube of red lipstick that I bring with me. 

Daniel continues to encourage me to drink, and just to fuck around, my mouth opens up with my chin lifted as Daniel hollers and pours champagne into my mouth. The liquid splatters and the euphoria washes over me. My eyes are trained at Toto for a moment, watching him as he continues to look at his driver proudly before he turns to look at me with a smug smile. 

I can’t even say anything to him, my brain has left. And even if I do say something, Daniel has already beaten me to it by nudging me. 

I grin as I witness him drink champagne on his shoe— they call it a shoey. It’s an Australian thing, I believe. At this moment I wonder what kind of tradition did Britain have. But my brain disappears once more when he offers me his shoe. 

My mind said no for a moment, but what did I have to lose? 

My hand snatches the alcohol-filled wear, cringing at the burning sensation that fills my throat as I wipe my mouth. A grin remains in my lips as everyone begins to clap for the winners.

I can’t help but look at Toto, who returns my look as he winks and smirks. Like he’s got tricks up his sleeve to show. I roll my eyes with exaggeration, chuckling as I mouth, “Congratulations.”

If this won’t make it to the sports headlines, then I don’t know what will. 

[rucbarthatbowtiesarecooldw]

Saturday Morning Session

Come Ye That Love the Lord

Conducting: Dallin H Oaks

The Morning Breaks

Sustaining vote – in the morning session? Normally afternoon

Church audit report – in the morning session? Normally afternoon

Did You Think to Pray

Jeffrey R. Holland

Awwwww the most fortunate of men!

More concentration, focus on the Savior, hope on His word, etc.

“Thanks are the highest form of thought. Gratitude is Happiness doubled by Wonder.” – Chesterton?

God hears every prayer we offer.

- Prayers are often answered differently than we expect

Our prayers are our sweetest hour, our most sincere desire, our most purest form of worship

Hesitation to pray doesn’t come from God.

Prayers should be spoken out loud. -It is a conversation with God

Listen to the spirit to know how to pray

If you don’t know what to pray for, just pray anyway!

Even the Savior had to pray to be closer to His Father – even He could pray “more earnestly.”

J Anette Dennis

You can look for a deeper meaning in all the things you read – how does this bring you closer to the Savior?

Jesus Christ is the center of ALL covenants we make.

Covenant relationships bless us, but it is out choice as to how,

Everything done in the Temple points to Gods plan for us. -Prayerfully seek the further meanings

Our symbolic outer clothing is only worn in the temple. Other than the garments, although those show that Jesus covers us.

Armor of Light – which is Christ

Choose to have a relationship with God by making and keeping covenants with Him

Alexander Dushku

Restoration began with a boys desperate prayer and a pillar of light

Rather than a pillar of light, the Lord sends us a ray of light – and then another, and then another

How do you experience the rays of light from the Lord? -Peace, impressions, desires, testimonies, hopefulness, prayer, feeling the love of God as you serve others

If we’re believing and repenting, we ARE living in revelation, even if we don’t recognize it or think we are experiencing it.

You cannot always expect big miracles and pillars of light – the Light comes line upon line, precept upon precept, here a ray and there a ray

Experiencing depression and anxiety make it difficult (sometimes impossible) to recognize the Spirit - Sometimes we don’t even know we are feeling the Spirit at all until after the fact!

Perhaps one ray is not enough for a Testimony, but together they can become a Light that will scare away the darkness.

D&C 93:36 “The glory of God is intelligence, or, in other words, light and truth.”

D&C 50:24 “That which is of God is light; and he that receiveth light, and continueth in God, receiveth more light; and that light groweth brighter and brighter until the perfect day.”

Press Forward Saints

Ulisses Soares

Covenant confidence through Christ

When we enter the Lords house, we embark on a sacred journey to become like Christ

What happens IN the temples is important

Remain Confident in Christ

Confidence in the covenants made with Jesus Christ is something you should pass on to your children

“My disciples shall stand in holy places and not be moved.”

Go to the temple with confidence and humility - Make preparations to go – not just for those going for the first time. We should be perpetually preparing - Will help with anxiety about worthiness

Home centered, Church supported, Temple Bound - Being Temple bound connects us to the Savior

Cast not away your confidence, instead let your confidence wax strong.

Jack N Gerard

Jesus Christ is our exemplar. - Integrity means being true to God, to each other, and to our identity.

Do what is right, let the consequence follow.

Exercise integrity in your choices

Would others see God through my conduct?

A life of integrity is not a life of perfection - Due to the fact that during this life you literally cannot be perfect - Perfection exists but not in me

Christian kindness is not a substitute for integrity - Meaning don’t be fake in your kindness? - Don’t be hypocrites?

I Know that My Savior Loves Me

Henry B Eyring

Story about going to the temple and finding out after the sealing that people have lost houses (teton dam break) and they left their kids at home and had to spend the night in a hotel and couldn’t make it home

“How can you sleep at a time like this?” - Whatever the outcome, all will be well because of the temple. We have made covenants - Apostles at gethsemane

John 14:27 “Peace I leave with you, my peace I give unto you: not as the world giveth, give I unto you. Let not your heart be troubled, neither let it be afraid.”

God will not abandon His relationship to all those who have covenanted with Him - He will never tire in His efforts to help us, and we will never exhaust His willingness to support us

Light and hope can come from keeping covenants, and they are opportunities to draw closer to God

We Thank Thee O God for a Prophet

[thewordfortheday]

“Be anxious for nothing, but in everything, by prayer and supplication with thanksgiving, let your requests be made known unto God."Philippians 4:6 If we’re going to impact our families, our nation, and our world in these critical days, prayer is where it begins. What was the first thing the Early Church did after Jesus’ ascension? "They returned to Jerusalem…to an upper room” and “continued with one accord in prayer and supplication…” (Acts 1:12-14). If those who walked alongside our Lord for three years were dependent upon prayer, how much more are we? What a grave mistake we make if we are casual about our prayer life. If worry assails you, pray, if you are anxious, pray, and give thanks because He's a God who answers your prayers.

[thenotsoholyspirit]

Holding pt 3

(Here for part 1-2)

Matt murdock x reader (angst)

Summary: A little talk with the right man ends up revealing more than the necessary information.

(I pushed myself to give it more action and context, so forgive me if the timeline is not quite accurate for season 3. There's a lot of mention of catholic related topics too if you're not comfortable with that . Either way hope you enjoy it and thanks for all the support ❤️✨️)

◇•◇•◇•◇•◇•◇•◇•◇•◇•◇•◇•◇•◇•◇•◇•◇•

It didn't take much time for the announcement of the release of the Kinpin to become all journals headlines.

As I go down my building heading for work, the first thing I notice are the newspapers laying downstairs the entry.

"FEDERAL COURT HEARS FISK APPEAL"

I stare dumbfounded.

Even if I have promised myself to keep my distance from Matt, I immediately feel the urge to go and find him as I'm more than aware of all the trouble this criminal has brought upon the devil of Hells kitchen and the place itself.

I look at my phone. It's almost six in the morning. I still have time before heading down the veterinary.

I'm unsure where to go first as he would surely no longer be at the Law Firm. Even my instinct to give Foggy a call is quickly refrained as I remember what he told me about our last talk.

What have you gotten yourself into this time, Matty.

Suddenly, I hear the usual resounding ring from the church's bells down the drive. From both corners of the sidewalk, I see small groups of people enter the place, the usual morning crowd.

How didn't I think about it before

Before I can lose more time, I run down the street, calling the closest taxi.

....

"As we say this, we bless ourselves three times by making a small cross on our-"

Clinton Church wouldn't exactly be the first place most people would go to if they were in the search of a devil dressed like a vigilante, yet as soon as I timidly open its door, the familiar incense smell and gothic columns reassure me that I've come to the right place. 

As I come in, I quickly go sit on one of the empty seats from the back. Father Lantom has already started the mass. 

I can not let myself but let a small smile leave my lips. It's been such a long time since I've last been here. 

While vaguely hearing the Father talk, memories of long ago lived moments fill through my mind. Small snippets of my old life.

“May almighty God bless you, the Father, and the Son, and the Holy Spirit.”  

I raise my head up when I hear the priest pronounce his final lines. This was it. 

Thankfully, not many people want to talk to him this morning, as most leave or simply stay in the right corner where the prayer candles softly illuminate the walls. I get lost for a moment, staring at the wavy shadows.

“Aren't they pretty... Some may take them as nothing else than silly good omens, but I'd rather see them as a representation of hope. People always need hope...."

I turn around, noticing Father Fantom looking at me curiously. I'm quite surprised he has noticed me. He invites me to sit down.

"I wasn't expecting to see you this morning miss (y/n), ” he chuckles slightly, "A bit late to mass although"

"I... I don't want to take too much of your time sir, but I need to know if you've well-," I try to smile, feeling quite vulnerable all out of the sudden "Seen or heard anything about Matt"

His face suddenly turns more serious, yet he barely looks surprised.

Is it this obvious

"That may depend on your own answer, miss.. I haven't seen you in quite a long time"

I nod, understanding his peak in curiosity.

"I know...." I look down the floor. "It's not like him and me are exactly on talking terms neither"

"(Y/n)... Matthew came here late last night searching for some answers , " he stares at the statue of Jesus placed beside the altar. "These are difficult times for him.. He needs some guidance..."

Father Lantom sighs softly as he shakes his head

"And some hope too....and I'm not just necessarily talking about his extracurricular activities...."

"I understand that." I nod sternly, knowing that something was different from his last visit. "But I'm not sure I'm in the best position to be of any help, neither ."

Im not sure why Im being so open with him, but I guess the serious yet caring tone of Father Lantom invites me to be more honest. I continue talking

"I'm not sure if I'm strong enough"

He gently gives me a tap on the shoulder.

"I'm not requesting you to forgive him (y/n)... that's an answer only your heart can give..." He tries to keep a reassuring tone, "I just worry of what he may push himself to do"

Suddenly, the silence of the church feels heavier. I rethink of the news. It just clicks in my head

"Don't tell me.... Don't tell me he wants to take care of Fisk on his own "

"He didn't mention-.."

But I interrumpt him, understanding now Matt's logic. His anger, his guilt.

I get it just.. just why

"No.. He can't .. he can not do that.... He.."

"This city is already dangerous as it is (y/n)." Father Lantom looks at me with worry. He seems to have understood my own intentions, too. "It's not the time to play even more precarious games right now"

But I can't. I need to stop him before it's too late.

I look at my phone again. It's already eight.

Guess I better call off sick

"I gotta go"

I immediately jump on my feet. I give a last look to Father Lantom and the candles.

If everything ends up all right, I may give a chance to one of those.

"(y/n)!"

I hear his call, but I decide to ignore him as I step outside. I cannot wait.

There was no time to lose.

[theprinceofpeacesposts]

All afflictions are temporary, God will deliver you

"The afflictions of the righteous are many, but the LORD delivers him from them all." Psalm 34:19

Today, God's word is strengthening you as you go through life's challenges and sufferings. Don't think that maybe God doesn't love you because you're experiencing the troubles of this world.

When the word says "the afflictions of the righteous," it means that even God's blameless people suffer. When you face afflictions and troubles, it doesn't mean you've sinned or you're unworthy. No! Even the righteous suffer many afflictions.

So, Child of God, know that troubles and sufferings are part of the righteous life. We have much to learn from Job, who endured immense suffering. And God testified of him to Satan, saying, "Have you considered my servant Job? There is no one on earth like him; he is blameless and upright, a man who fears God and shuns evil." Job 1:8

Jesus Christ also told us, "In the world, you will have tribulation. But take heart; I have overcome the world." John 16:33 So, suffering and tribulation are things we will encounter in our lives, and it doesn't mean that the one suffering lacks something or is weaker than the one who isn't suffering.

The good news today is the promise God has given us in this word: "But the LORD delivers him from them all." Psalm 34:19 God has assured us of His healing and salvation. He has promised to heal all afflictions, not some, but all.

Some people have lost hope because there's something they've been praying for, for a long time, but it hasn't been answered yet. Everything else has been answered by God, except that particular problem. So, they've come to accept that problem as a part of their lives. They feel like God won't answer it. The word says, "God will heal all." There's no illness or disease that is yours. No affliction is yours permanently. All the sufferings you're going through are temporary, and

God will heal all your afflictions and you will live a life of joy and peace, praising your God for his goodness and grace in your life.

PRAYER: Thank you, LORD, for your promise to heal me and deliver me from all afflictions. Today, I surrender myself to you in faith, believing that you can save me from all my troubles, Amen.

[thengrace]

24 things I learned at 24.

Thank God, continuously thanking God is so important, it moves us from the earthly perspective into a heavenly perspective, it shifts our entire minds to be reminded of how powerful God is, how far He has brought us, what He is going to do.

Trust your gut, what it's telling you, and no matter how much you try to ignore it, the reality is that it's usually right.

It's okay for friendships to end, it's okay that things didn't work out, sometimes seasons change and with that, comes the end of certain relationships.

You shouldn't strive in a relationship, and this goes for friendships or romantic relationships; it shouldn't feel like a chore to make plans or talk, it should feel natural, and easy, that doesn't mean there won't be conflict, but it should feel like both people are equally invested. And if not, it's one-sided.

Always wait for what you deserve, whether that be a friendship or a romantic relationship, we shouldn't compromise because we are lonely or bored, that's not going to fulfill you.

Sometimes God has us wait to teach us patient and to depend on Him, instead of asking Him to hurry up, ask yourself, what can I do in this waiting period to prepare myself for what He has for me?

It's okay to feel all your emotions, the good, the hard, it's important to let yourself go through the cycle of emotions, learning to sit with your feelings is healthy, no matter how uncomfortable it is.

If something still bothers you after many days, that's a sign you should speak up and tell the person that hurt you how you feel, you'll feel so much better afterwards.

Conflict is necessary, and healthy, and no matter how much you hate it, you cannot avoid it. Conflict will help you grow in many ways.

Sitting in the silence with God is so important, the enemy wants nothing more than for you to be distracted, but God is calling us to deep contemplation of His Word and to sit at His feet and listen to what He has to say.

Tell others how you feel, what you're struggling with, don't let your story be, "I was alone and didn't have anybody," but instead, "I told that one person I trusted and there was healing."

Everyone makes choices and you can't save everybody, once you realize that, it'll change the way you show up in relationships. We have to let God work too.

Jesus is Savior, not me. I'm not responsible for someone's choices or sinfulness, I can pray for them, but at the end of the day, God simply wants me to be a vessel of His mercy, He alone has the power to save.

True friendship will survive long-distances, changing seasons, and once you find that, hold onto it dearly.

We're never alone, even when we feel at our lowest, cry out to God, tell Him exactly how you feel, no matter how scary or dark it may be, God is listening to us, and wants to be our Comforter.

Worship changes things, when we simply get to that secret place and worship the Lord, there's a change in our hearts and in the heavenly places.

It's okay to live a simple life, to not make the most money or be the most "successful" person in your family, as long as we are doing the work of the Lord, that's successful in the eyes of the Lord.

Pray unceasingly, when you wake up, when you're driving somewhere, God is a Friend, and He is always available and can be found in the everyday moments like driving to work or going to the gym.

It's okay if your prayers sound like, "God, I don't know what to do." God can take it, no matter how "ugly" it may be.

God is a Provider and a God of completeness, and if He brings you through one part of a trial, why wouldn't He stand with you until it's completed?

There are so many prayers that won't be answered for years, but God is still working, no matter how long it takes, be faithful in prayer, God will bless your faithfulness.

Remember the old things you loved to do, and continue to do them. Don't forget what makes you joyful, like an old skill or hobby that you used to find comfort in, those things will still bring joy even years later.

Don't spend too much time on things that might bring out the worst in you, like social media, it's wisdom to know what is your weakness, and to abstain from it.

Above all, trust God. Trust that He has good intentions for you and that He is going to get you through whatever infirmities, internal struggles, and relational issues you are dealing with. We have a good God.

[ultramegagigamax3]

2: my heart, i never feel /ej

i never see

i never know

oh, heart

and then it falls

and then I fall

and then I know

masterlist ~ last ~ next

It felt as if I had been awoken by my alarm as soon as my head hit the pillow. I let out a loud groan, just lying there as I let my alarm ring. I allowed myself about twenty more minutes before grabbing my phone and shutting it off. I push myself up, I had fallen asleep in the same clothes as the day before, the folds of my jeans and the wiring of my bra digging into my skin. I look down at my wrinkled white T-shirt, it had a corny Jesus pun on it with tacky imagery, a gag gift I had gotten from a nun after I graduated high school. It’s probably one of the ugliest things I’ve ever seen, why the hell do I still have this? I let out a yawn as I drag myself away from the comforts of my mattress, not bothering to change my sweaty clothes. I grabbed my big old puffer jacket off a pile of laundry and my backpack out of whatever corner I had thrown it in. I lazily brush my teeth before dry swallowing my morning pills, almost gagging myself in the process. After slipping on my work shoes, I finally grab my keys and white coat before rushing out into the blinding outside. The white coat smelt like death, literally, but I had no time to wash. (God, I’m disgusting, aren’t I?) I get in my car, it takes too long to start. Traffic is heavy, despite the short commute. No time for breakfast, stomach growls. This is my routine, this has been my life for the past year.

Despite my past childish philosophies about life and death sciences, I had become an overly qualified mortician. The path to my career had been rocky, complicated, and ultimately anticlimactic. Although my childhood and teenage years had been volatile and dramatic, my college years had passed in a monotonous haze. There isn’t much to say about it, I got accepted to a Christian university on a crazy good scholarship (thank you to my depressingly pathetic life story). I studied anatomy and physiology, spending my time throwing myself into schoolwork. My original plan had been to go into the medical field, to become the hero I dreamed of being as a child. But alas, I lasted about 6 months in med school before I dropped out. It was over, just like that. The dream of medical school was completely squashed, or at least that’s how it felt at the time. The story of my dropping out had a slow buildup of many different factors, all coming together for a cocktail of stress and mental deterioration. The overwhelming workload, peers and professors who had been particularly ruthless, a loss of innocence, a letter from my birth mother, and Jack disappearing. I had somewhat of a mental crisis before enrolling in mortuary school, to say the least. It had been impulsive, and I had only been half sane. I feel ashamed admitting it, but in my haze, I had chosen this profession in the hopes I would come across Jack’s body, closure. I don’t know if he’s dead, no one does, but something within me felt it. Well, the “me” who had been going through a manic episode felt it, however trustworthy she is.

Nonetheless, I got help, I got more meds, and now I am stuck as a mortician’s apprentice. I’m sure there was a way for me to drop out, but the prospect of being a failure again filled me with an overwhelming sense of shame. I had no passion or care for the field, my goal since childhood was to be seen as something akin to a hero, and yes, I know how stupid that sounds. But doctors saved lives. What did morticians do? There are temples in the name of God, and in these temples, you pray for healing. In turn, they answer your prayers, he saves your or your loved one’s life. A hero. Or they don’t. If they don’t, you can’t fault them, as this is the will of fate, something unshakable, uncontrollable, beyond our mortal comprehension. If doctors are proxies of God, then morticians are proxies to psychopomps. What is a psychopomp? Think Charon, the ferryman of Hades; A being that must be bribed by gold in order to ensure your loved ones gain safe passage. No one worships Charon (he doesn’t even have a statue, I think). Not only that, but he is also a worker of Hades, God of the Underworld, and the equivalent to Hell itself. Charon is a demon; Charon is an echo of Grim Reaper, an apathetic antagonistic force in the world of modern media. Sure, there are sympathetic or even cool interpretations of Grim Reaper everywhere. Artists and thinkers all have their own idea of Grim Reaper, or Death; demon with a heart, beautifully evil maiden, a tragic worker doomed by fate, the greatest enemy of man, a benign God, the one true God, an old friend, the ultimate muse. But no matter in what light you paint him, or Charon and other psychopomps, you would never want to actually associate with him, would you?

As a young adult hiked up on too many pills, this is how my mind, that has only ever known Catholicism, worked. It’s stupid, I know. But when you have been raised with only the guidance of the Catholic church (and, maybe the internet), that’s all you will ever know: God (and the internet). Becoming a patron of Charon was something I didn’t want for myself. But one thing scared me more than violating my personal philosophies: disappointment. Disappointing others was not uncommon for me, but I was tired of it. At one point, during the fog of the weeks that lead up to my registration, I had gone back to my Church to consult with the nuns of my decision. I was clearly manic, I’m sure, but I can still remember the looks of hope on their faces. Just months prior, I had been here to tell them I had dropped out of medical school. They looked at me not with disappointment, but as if they had seen this coming. As if they hadn’t expected me to do much with my life. But now, they had hope for me. And so, I decided I would turn my life around, I would commit to mortuary school. Perhaps this change of pace would teach me something of humility, change my mind about my sense of self, and fix my personality for me. If I could finally succeed in something, I would succeed in this. This would mark the beginning of a new era of my life. I would become a better person.

I ended up getting to work completely late. My clothes a mess, my hair even worse, I was starving, I was half awake, I was cold, I was achy. God, I complain a lot. I burst through the front doors of the funeral home, immediately being met with a group of my coworkers hovering around the entrance. The 3 women and 1 man jumped in surprise at my sudden appearance, and I quickly bowed my head as I attempted to scurry past them. The only thing on my mind was getting to the Director’s office, I had no time to entertain their mind-numbing small talk. Nonetheless, I heard a soft “woah, there” and felt a hand grab my arm. I was spun around to meet my colleagues, feeling small in the presence that seemed to metaphorically tower over me.

Leonardo Nguyen, grinning playboy, stood in front of me, still holding onto my arm. “Morning, [  ]! Not even gonna say hello?” He seemed to always have a smug look about him, like he knew something about you that no one else did and was ready to exploit it whenever he had the chance. He had been one of the few men working in the funeral home, a rare sight. Perhaps that had gotten to his head, in one way or another. We, unfortunately, work under the same mortician.

“Leo, stop.” Margo Shwartz, a wolf in wolves clothing, lightly tapped Leonardo on the arm, tone utterly ingenuine. Don’t let her alternative appearance fool you, she looked like a punk and acted like a total high school mean girl, almost comedically so. I had a sneaking suspicion she had been bullied in her high school years and developed a complex about it. If I had to work with her, I would’ve killed myself by now.

“What? Can’t say ‘hi’ to my favorite doctor?” Leonardo was mocking me.

Isabella let out a giggle and rolled her eyes, “Whatever, Leo.”

I glanced nervously at the two other girls, searching for a way out. “My apologies, Leo, but I’m running late and really need to clock in. Please, save this for another time.” I begged. He would shrug and release me, and I give him a curt nod, a “thank you”, and hurry down the main hall. I could hear the group break out into giggles behind me, childish as always. Most all my fellow apprentices were between the ages of 20 to 25, while I had been nearing 30. It was strange, how cruel they are, and frustrating. I wondered if I had done anything wrong to them, besides being quiet and avoiding long conversation. Maybe it’s because I’m “old”? They seemed to have an endless supply of half-witted age jokes at their disposal, if they ran out of med school dropout ones. That’s how kids show their love these days, Samanatha had told me once. If I had been the same person I was in my teens and twenties, I probably would’ve fought back. I was no stranger to altercation. But alas, I’ve lost my bark and my bite, defanged and declawed beyond recognition. I let out a small sigh as I reached the funeral director’s office.

“Hello, Director Drake.” I avoided her gaze as I hurried over a board in a corner of the room. There, old fashioned punch in sheets sat in uniform rows pinned to a cork board, both stress inducing and comforting, paradox.

Vanya Drake sat with her arms crossed from her desk, her stare burning a hole in the back of my head. “[  ].”

“Yes, ma’am?” I grabbed my sheet and began to fill it out with a pen that had already been laid by the board, my back is to her as I’m too nervous to meet her gaze.

Drake let out a deep sigh, as if she were trying to keep her composure. “I keep telling you…”

I placed my punch in sheet in its respective pocket, then let my head drop in defeat. I was hoping she would let me off the hook this time (again), “I know, Director, I’m sorry. I’m really sorry, I had an appointment, then I overslept, and the traffic…” I turned and rushed up to her desk, my hands held up in a prayer position, force of habit.

She raises a palm at me, gesturing for me to stop. “[  ], if I continue to let this slide, you know what the consequences will be…” I felt my heart sink, my stomach turned, I felt sick. “…But. I have a proposal.”

My ears perked up, and suddenly I was standing straighter. “Yes, ma’am! I’m all ears!” My hands flailed a bit before I shot them back down to my sides, an aborted attempt at seeming enthusiastic.

“Finish your shift. Then meet me back here.” She looked how I imagined a mother trying to hide her frustration might look. One of the head nuns would look at me that way. She even shooed me away with a flick of the wrist, like a dog. I nod frantically, bowing and muttering more thank you’s and whatnot.

Her words would linger about my mind my entire shift, making it difficult to focus. I had a suspicion she enjoyed making people suffer. Oh yeah, and my stomach was growling. Luckily, I was assigned to paperwork instead of a cadaver for the waxing hours of my shift. The apprentices had no real office “yet”, so we were told to take up tables in the employee’s lounge, a glorified breakroom. Nothing about this funeral home ran the way it should’ve, probably (its thing only thing I’ve ever known). There are two directors, Drake and James Bernard. From what I know, Bernard used to run the place with his late wife, then hired a young Drake to take her place. But then, with Drake’s stern attitude and unwavering ambition (and Bernard’s aging mind) she basically took over the home. There were a handful of morticians that worked under the two of them, and they each had their own set of apprentices, give or take. I don’t remember very many of their names, though I do know most of the other apprentices, unfortunately. Leo and I currently worked under a Ms. Mehrab, an eccentric older woman with a passion for her work. She isn’t a catholic, unlike most everyone else who works here, and I, in my weak faith, got along with her fairly well. I enjoyed her presence, despite how odd she is, and her long spiels about whatever topic came to mind. I tried to become closer to her, perhaps she would become my friend, but she favored Leo. Like, a lot. She tended to send me off for paperwork and kept Leo for cadavers, said that I brought down the mood. (we’re morticians, what else would the mood be?) I’m currently sitting by a window, staring out at the busy street and the forest that lay beyond it. The trees are tall, skinny, and have lost most of their leaves by this time of year. Would my life always be so mundane? Was I destined for eternal boredom? My thoughts are interrupted by a loud thud on my “desk”, and I nearly jump out of my seat. I curse under my breath as I look up at Leo. I hold in a groan as I force a polite smile.

“Leo.” I mutter.

“Here, Mehrab wants you to work on these too.” He looks as smug as always. I look down at what he had just pushed in front of me; a white binder filled to the brim with papers, and a protein bar. “Oh, and, uh, that’s for you.” Leo suddenly seems less confident now, though only a bit, as he gestures towards the snack.

I’m taken aback, speechless, for a moment. “Oh, thank you.” I nod, feeling uneasy. Leonardo? Being nice? Was I dead and sent to a parallel universe?

“Yeah, don’t mention it.” He looks uncomfortable as he stood there for a moment, as if he had more to say. But whatever he wanted to say he didn’t say it, as he just gave me a nod and trudged out of the room. Something about the strange interaction feels familiar, and something within my twists, feeling confused, weirded out, and empty.

--------

I had been a good chunk of the way through the never-ending stream of papers when Leo showed up again, this time not catching me by surprise.

“You’re needed in the basement, doctor.” He chided as he languidly stepped into the room, making a beeline for the coffee pot. He was back to his usual, annoying self. I roll my eyes and gather my things, pulling on my white coat and tying back my hair as I hurried out of the room. I know it’s strange to say, but the prospect of seeing the new cadavers filled me both with dread and excitement. Although I had long since abandoned most of the ideas and philosophies of my youth, something within me still felt as if I were on the cusp of finding Jack again. Its morbid, its fucked up, but I still wanted my closure.

“Young John Doe,” Mehrab sighs and pouts, “how tragic.” Her words don’t match her demeanor as she moves around the room, setting up tools and what not, methodical and clinical, totally detached emotionally. I stare at the boy as I pull on my gloves, he’s unbelievably pale with buzzed black hair. He’s young, most likely in his late teens or early twenties. His face is soft, chiseled like a statue, and his body is long and skinny, his movements probably awkward when he was alive. There are brown, bruised, and rotting little holes all along the bicep, forearm, and the crook of his elbow of his left arm, junkie. I study his face and wonder about the life he may have lived, and perhaps searched his features for glimpses of Jack. It was stupid, he was much too young to be Jack, and, on top of that, corpses are almost unrecognizable in comparison to the way the looked in life. But I can’t help it. I can see Mehrab reading off a small stack of papers, is it a police report? I don’t think she’s meant to have access to those… “Overdose, found by a young couple walking their dog…” She shakes her head.

“They know the cause of death?” Something doesn’t seem right.

“Yup!” Mehrab continues to flip through the papers.

“So, he’s visited the coroner already? So why is he here?” I’m utterly confused. “If this is a fresh John Doe, isn’t there an investigation going on? Why would they send him off to be embalmed? Shouldn’t he be with, like, a pathologist or examiner or something?” At least he wasn’t being cremated…

Mehrab sighed, placing a hand on her hip, like a teacher fed up with a dumb student. “[  ], we are morticians, not detectives.” She walks over from her desk and picks up the mouth stapler, my least favorite tool, and grabs my right hand, placing the tool on my palm.

“Yes, right, my bad, ma’am.” I sputter, shaking my head and pulling myself out of my trance, “It’s just… I’ve never been assigned a John Doe before.”

Mehrab smiles, seeming pleased with my response. “It’s fine, I totally get it!” She says this with the cadence of a teenage girl, despite being nearly 50 years old, “The night shift boys usually get these ones, but” she draws out the ‘but’, “they’ve been a little shorthanded, as of late.” She walks back to her desk, throwing herself into her plush chair.

I attempt to smile back, trying to lighten the mood. “So… we’re picking up their slack?” I try to seem more comfortable and less awkward than I am.

“Yeah, sure, whatever.” She turns away from me, focus already totally on her computer, paying me no mind. “Now, I’ll be at my desk if you have trouble, okay?” She was patronizing me, and I just look back at her stupidly. I nod, a soft okay, and turn back to the body.

The boy’s skin is cold, who knows how long he’s been dead. I open his mouth and see his teeth, stained and rotting. The stench wafts through my mask, past the peppermint essential oils that I drenched it in, and I feel like gagging, but I don’t. I still felt bad when I did this, like I was hurting him. I tried to be gentle and imagine myself a doctor giving a patient a painful, yet lifesaving, treatment. Shh, it’s alright, I would soothe, you’re just gonna feel a liiiittle pinch, then you’ll be okay. He would fall asleep (I would glue his eyes shut) and I would give him his shots (I would fill him with embalming fluid) and when he awoke, it would be as if he were never sick. I tried not to feel as if I were violating the boy as I moved his body around. I checked all injuries, realizing I had finally broken my eerie silence as I listed off every bruise I found to Mehrab.

“Ah, you’re so quiet! So focused!” Mehrab spoke, I think trying to come off as playful, but I could sense her masked unease.

The procedure was over as soon as it started, and I wheeled him to the room where he would be staying. I looked up at the walls, rows of little steel boxes lined every side. The more I looked at them, the more they looked like aisles of ovens, and now I feel sick. I took you John Doe to an empty box, open and ready to swallow him up, and put him inside. I wonder if anyone will come looking for him, perhaps a worried mother or a band of hiked up junkies. After I closed him away, I look over at the other boxes.

“Don’t forget Jenny!” Mehrab’s voice startles me as she calls out from the main room,  probably wondering what the hell was taking me so long. There was a funeral later today, for a woman named Jenny Woodrow, and her body would need to be prepared. She was placed just next to my John Doe. I wheel my cart over to her box before opening it up and pulling her out. She’s a pretty blonde with a near perfect figure, perfect teeth (before I shut her mouth), and perfect eyes (before I closed them up), such a shame. Well, she was almost perfect, save for the fact her lower body, past her hips, were missing. I remember the police report as I took her to the main room, she had been found out in the woods, not too far from here, her bottom half never recovered. Looking at bodies like this used to make me sick, but I’ve become desensitized, more or less.

--------

It’s now nearing 1:00 pm, and I am once again standing in front of Drake. My legs hurt, I still haven’t eaten anything, and I was exhausted.

Drake smiled at me when I first walked in, now she’s just staring at me with her lips pressed into a thin line. We got formalities and what not out of the way, now I was just waiting for her to spit out whatever “proposal” she had for me.

She was assessing my face, searching for something, but I wasn’t quite sure what. “We need someone on the graveyard shift…” My expectant smile drops, “You remember Paula? Well, she quit. Baby on the way. Now there’s a big opening in need of urgent replacement.” Paula Kent, a 23-year-old apprentice who had a husband before I had a lover, and now a baby, apparently. “You’re going to be working with Director Bernard and Mr. Hunt.” James Bernard and James Hunt, two elderly, bordering on senile, peas-in-a-pod. Drake went back to just staring at me, waiting for my answer.

I would have to change my meeting times with Dr. Trembly, or perhaps get a new therapist altogether. The thought filled me with dread, but I needed this job. Bad. I had no other skills, I had no drive to pursue anything else. If I quit, or if I was fired, I would probably just stay at home until I rotted away into nothingness (and then, I would be right back over here… God, I couldn’t stand the idea of Leo looking over my dead naked body, yuck). I stayed quiet for a moment as I thought. I allowed a beat to pass. “Okay.” I replied, feeling defeated.

“Okay?” Drake didn’t seem sure.

“Uh, yes. Yes, ma’am, I can do it. When do I start?” I stuttered, attempting to seem surer of myself than I was.

Drake’s face would break into a wide smile, customer service-esque. “Excellent! I want you here later tonight.”

I was taken aback, “Wait, what? Tonight? But…”

“Don’t worry,” Drake sat up and began shifting papers around her desk, indicating that she had work to do and wanted me gone, “You’ll get compensation. Now, hurry home and get some rest, okay?”

… “Okay.”

[finalgirleddiemunson]

Everything is Better with You (Eddie Munson x Reader)

summary: While Eddie is well aware love doesn’t fix all the world’s problems, loving you sure feels like it does. (wc 950)

warnings: kissing, implied fem reader (use of the word girlfriend), please let me know if I missed anything!

a/n: I’m so blown away by all the love on Loving You is Easy. Thank you, thank you, thank you! My ask box and messages are always open. Have some soft Eddie. (also, this is a side blog, so look for replies from my main!)

-----

Eddie knows that a relationship can’t fix everything in his life. 

And, he knows it’s not supposed to. Because that’s like the first step in the 101 Guide: How To Have An Unhealthy and Codependent Relationship and Make Your Girlfriend Sick of You. He knows. 

But, Christ- one look at you and that all flies out the window. 

It’s the typical Friday night routine for the two of you- you’re in Eddie’s room, lounging on his bed while a tape plays in the background. 

You alternate who gets to pick the music every time you’re together. Eddie pretends to be put out by anything that isn’t his usual metal, but you both know it’s only for show. If you wanted to pick the music every second that you two were together he would let you without complaint. 

But that’s something he loves about you. You want to listen to his music. You want to hear him talk about his favorite bands. You encourage it. 

For a while, Eddie wasn’t sure there was anyone in the world who would want to not only hear what he had to say, but encourage him to speak more. 

Eventually, he had the Hellfire Club and Corroded Coffin and he created spaces where he knew he was wanted. But, all of those years of being the town “freak” aren’t easy for Eddie to shake off, no matter the bravado he tries to hide behind. 

“And so then I told Robin, if you don’t like working for Keith that much, I can try to get you and Steve a job with me. Not that it’s an amazing improvement or whatever, but then we could all work together and that would be fun,” you say, laying on your stomach as you mindlessly flick through a magazine you had brought with you.

“Why would you help Robin and Steve get a job? Weren’t you just talking to Robin?” He asks, trying to split his attention between your story and the way your hands trace the letters across the pages. 

“Robin said they come as a package deal nowadays. And, in case you’ve forgotten, Steve’s our friend too, so obviously I would want to work with him.”

Eddie scoffs because he knows it’ll get a reaction out of you. “Let Harrington find his own job. He’s gotta get his wings someday.”

You gasp, pushing your magazine to the side in favor of flipping onto your back so that you can stare up at Eddie. He’s trying to wipe the self-satisfied smile off his face at having successfully gotten your undivided attention, but he knows he’s not doing a great job.

 “I’m shocked and appalled at you, Munson. We can’t leave a man behind in the battlefield of retail.” There’s no real heat behind your words, a soft smile over-taking your face as you look up at him. 

Jesus, that smile. 

Eddie’s not religious, but he’s not opposed to sending up a few thankful prayers to whatever made this moment possible. This moment of you smiling up at him, the dim lighting of his room warming your face and catching on your lashes. 

Instead of answering, Eddie’s unable to resist the urge to lean down and press a kiss to your forehead. You eyes close and you let out a content sigh, the kind that finds its way into Eddie’s chest and wraps around his heart. 

“I can’t believe you’d suggest abandoning Steve,” you continue. 

“Yeah?” He presses a kiss to your cheekbone.

“That’s just awful,” you murmur. 

“Horrible,” he agrees, kissing your temple. 

“I’ll- I’ll have to... tell him you said that…he’ll be so offended,” Your breath catches as his lips find your jaw.

Eddie hums, much more interested in tracing your bottom lip with his thumb. And when your head turns so that you can place a kiss to the palm of his hand, Eddie just can’t let that stand without consequences. 

His lips trace a path from your jaw to your chin before finding your lips. It’s not a demanding kiss, but it’s not gentle as his mouth coaxes yours open. 

The smell of your perfume and body wash is invading his senses and making him feel like he’s floating. The little sighs you make under him are putting his head in a spin better than anything he’s ever smoked. If he could find a way to bottle this moment with you and get drunk on it forever, he would.

When he finally pulls away to catch his breath, he can’t stop the lovesick grin from splitting across his face. 

“You make everything better,” he blurts out. He doesn’t mean to say it, but he also can’t bring himself to regret it when you take your bottom lip in between your teeth, suddenly shy. 

“Everything?” You laugh softly.

“Yeah,” he rubs his nose against yours. “Maybe I’m not supposed to say that shit, but yeah. You make everything better. Feel like I could conquer the world when I’m with you.”

Your hands find his hair, gently pushing strands away from his face. “You make everything better, too,” you whisper. Like it a secret, just for the two of you. And then you’re kissing him again, softer this time. Pouring every ounce of love that you can into it.

Eddie knows a relationship can’t fix everything. That part of him will always remember being called the town freak and his struggles throughout school- everything that he’s been through to get here, to get to you. 

But he’s also starting to believe that maybe that 101 Guide bullshit he’s made up in his head doesn’t apply when it comes to you and him. 

[lovebvni]

hii!! Im a christian shifter, but i have a question. Idk if you are christian, but if you can help me, that’d be great!! <3 also, hope your having a great day!

So, basically how should i try to shift as a christian? do i believe i can do it myself, or should i believe God makes me shift or not? Like how people ask the universe, etc, should i ask God?

And how could i make my scripts more christian like? (like how God would want it?)

Sorry if this doesnt make sense, and feel free not to answer if you dont want too! I just want to make sure im not doing anything wrong <3

have a good day, God bless.

(sorry for if i have bad grammar btw! english is confusing. And english is my first language 😭)

hii! yes i am a christian shifter. i would like to disclose my religious ideas are a little bit broader than the normal ones, so it may not have the same effect as if i was a conservative christian. i hope in my soul this can still help you though !! <3

so to include god more in my shifting journey, i literally pray every night for him to give me the strength to shift. i ask him to help me and guide me each step of the way with the tools, beings and people that have taught me thus far. i ask him to show me the way, and if it’s in his will allow me to shift the night in question.

but there is also some self confidence that comes into play. Philippians 4:6-7 says this “Be careful for nothing; but in every thing by prayer and supplication with thanksgiving let your requests be made known unto God. And the peace of God, which passeth all understanding, shall keep your hearts and minds through Christ Jesus.”

so basically, i interpret this scripture as give thanks that god introduced you to shifting, pray about being able to reach that goal, and work towards and have confident in yourself and god that it will happen. Like 1:37 “nothing will be impossible with god”

with implies you’re doing work too. you also have to believe in yourself! you can’t just say “god, can u feed my dogs for me to keep them alive? thanks man.” because it’s more likely than not he won’t do it. he definitely can! but that’s something you should be doing. and, if your dogs eat healthy, they will live long lives! :)

and that’s with the grace of god. he moves in every aspect of our lives if we know it or not.

with scripts, i really don’t know.. i mean i don’t physically script much but my best suggestion would be in your dr, preform activities you do here. such as reading the bible and praying.

i’m gonna be honest, i have one of the most unholy, jaw dropping, gut wrenching, soul snatching scripts known to this earth (which is why i haven’t posted them)

but i know, even in my drs, i pray and thank god. hell, even in my wr i literally said one of the first things i wanna do is meet jesus christ, okay?

but yeah. there’s nothing you have to add to your script, you just have to accept jesus into your heart in those realities too <3 and don’t give up on him

that’s all i have anon i hope this helps u <3 sorry it took so long to respond

[skippyv20]

Skippy, do you still do prayer requests? My husband had a mental breakdown recently and once we got him stabilized, I discovered he’d destroyed the family finances. He’s doing much better now and is able to work, but since he owned his own business all his clients have disappeared and gone elsewhere. He has several bids in for jobs, and we really need pretty much all of them to come through. We have a child with special needs and a lot is riding on this. Please pray, and thank you.

Hi! I am so sorry to hear what you and your husband have been going through. I am so happy to hear your husband is now doing better. Hold strong in faith, help is coming. Yes, I still do prayer requests, and of course will add you and your family to our Prayer List.🙏🏻❤️❤️❤️❤️

St. Jude, loving Saint and friend to us all. We come to you and pray for your intercession on behalf of our friend and her husband. They have been placed in a dire financial situation which has created much pain for them. They face a future of uncertainty and desperately need your help. Dear St. Jude as they try and rebuild their lives, our friend’s husband needs your intercession to be successful when bidding on jobs. We pray for them to receive the help of our loving God who promised us HE would never forsake us. With your close relationship with Jesus we pray for you to intercede on behalf of our friends, all our friends who face the same financial problems. We pray for you to intercede on behalf of all of friends, who face difficult trials when seeking employment. We come to you St. Jude as we know you are the Saint most trusted to intercede when we are desperate for immediate resolution. Thank you St. Jude and we promise to publish any/all prayers answered. God Bless our friend , her husband and their child🙏🏻❤️❤️❤️❤️ In Jesus’ name we pray.🙏🏻❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️

[the-lesser-light]

As someone new to Judaism, it's ridiculous how quickly I've had to learn to spot the red flags in 'helpful' learning tools.

The number of times I've clicked on a video claiming to offer a nice short explanation or something or how to do something and found someone yelling about "The True path to Christianity" is ridiculous.

What is worse is sometimes I'll start something and feel something is 'off' but can't quite place it then halfway into a 15 minute video they start talking about Redemption and Gates of Heaven and THE LORD. Ah yes, the hidden Christian. It's like a jump scare every time.

Me looking at a Sunset: Boy, I'd love to learn how to sing the prayer for seeing something beautiful. Google: How to thank Jesus Me: Jewish prayer for seeing something beautiful Google: Here it is in Hebrew. Me, who cannot read Hebrew: Jewish Prayer for seeing something beautiful in English Google: Here it is transliterated. Me: Great. But I'm butchering it. How do I SAY it. Google: Here's a Messianic man adding in a twenty minute explanation on why THE LORD is our Savior and we have to repent.

Me: .....Well the sunset is gone now. I'll go spend an hour looking into this for the next time I see a really pretty sunset.

I'd love to compile some helpful links for people like me, who are looking for answers that aren't always in the form of a long essay. Sometimes the essay is good and by all means I love a deep explanation, but when I'm in a hurry and don't understand how to say a prayer, all I want is something to click on and sing along with so that I feel like I'm doing it right and learning.

MyJewishLearning.com is the bee's knees, and Sefaria is amazing once you learn how to navigate it, but the real winner is the people who post the 1 minute videos that simply say "This is how you count the Omer. Sing it with me." And you suddenly feel like you can do it.

[rucbarthatbowtiesarecooldw]

Sunday Morning Session

Awake and Arise O Ye Slumbering Nations

Conducting: Henry B Eyring (in a chair!!)

Come Ye Children of the Lord

Ronald A Rasband

Words matter – they are the bedrock of how we connect and represent our beliefs, morals etc.

First and foremost the Lords words matter

If a man love me he will keep my words

Believing and heading the word of God will draw us closer to Him – our ability to be like Him will increase

D&C 6:2,

The words of Prophets matter

The Prophet hears and speaks the words of the Lord

THINK CELESTIAL

Diligently ACT upon his words – because he is the voice of the Lord on the earth today

Our own words matter

In our emoji filled world, our words matter!

Be careful what you say and how you say it

Thank you, I am sorry, and I Love You

These are not to be saved for special occasions! Use them constantly and cheerfully

The Words of Christ will tell you all things that you should do!

Susan H Porter

Our Heavenly Father LOVES YOU. You are His child. He Knows You. He will Bless You.

Pray to know

What do you need to know?

Heavenly Father are you really there? And do you hear and answer every childs prayer?

“Wait. I’m not alone. I have Christ.”

Cute children ugh

Often the best question to ask is not why but what

Pray to grow

He wants to help us grow!

Sent Christ to help us live

What do you need to grow? Patience, kindness, etc

Skills and sttributes

Pray to show.

Nephis bow

Heavenly Father does not force anyone to make a choice

Are you praying for blessings for your family and those you love? Don’t give up.

Don’t Stop Praying – Matthew West?

I know He lives and loves you – Pray. He is there.

A Childs Prayer

Dale G. Renlund

Kayaking excursion story

“A large wave, this big”

Keep paddling, maintaining your momentum and you will be fine

If we maintain spiritual momentum by continuously going toward the Savior, then we are secure

Maintain your momentum: faith, repentance, baptism/covenants, gift of the Holy Ghost, endure to the end

Enduring to the end is repeatedly doing the other for over and over again

Building and improving with each repetition – drawing us closer to Jesus Christ each time

This momentum requires speed and direction – if we are continually rowing as hard as we can in the wrong direction, we will not make it where we need to go

Doing spiritual things needs to happen daily – just like it doesn’t work to binge food once a week on Sundays, it also doesn’t help us build spiritual momentum if we are only doing spiritual things once a week

We can always keep going, no matter how many times we’ve fallen; the important part is that we do not give up (circling back to the story - stopping for a rest is not giving up)

We must never stop failing, because the minute we do, we’ve failed.

Multiple covenants draw us closer to Christ and connect us more strongly to Him

The covenants are not in and of themselves the source of power – the source is our Savior Jesus Christ and the covenants are the conduit to that source

Comparing ourselves to others can lead to errors

Don’t judge others for struggling when you are struggling too

None of us earn salvation – we never can. ALL of us need all of the Saviors Infinite Atonement, not just part of it.

Our judgement is neither helpful nor welcome, and is most often ill informed.

Paul B Pieper

Trust exercises

It is not a relationship if one person trusts completely and the other does not

Trust is the foundation of all relationships

Use the precious gift of repentance liberally

Sometimes we just need to be willing to fall backward and let Him catch us

To build trust in the Lord: Learn about Heavenly Father, notice things He does for us, sometimes do crazy trust exercises

Sometimes the best way to trust God is just to trust Him

He is always stretching us to help us realize more of our divine potential – allow Him to give you more soul stretching experiences

Trust Him just a little bit more

If we ignore or decline an invitation our progress stops

We can choose to trust God today and every day going forward. Each time we do, God will be there to catch us and our relationship with Him will grow stronger and stronger.

Redeemer of Israel

Patrick Kearon

His plan is designed to bring you home, not to keep you out. No one has built a roadblock and stationed someone there to keep you away – instead God is relentlessly seeking you

Christ’s great atoning gift removes every roadblock that would separate us from our spiritual home

This life is the time to make mistakes, to learn and grow, to love God and our neighbor, and to return home

The intent of the Father’s plan of happiness is your happiness. The intent of the Father’s plan of redemption is your redemption. The intent of the Father’s plan of mercy is to extend mercy. The intent of the Father’s plan of salvation is your salvation

We still need to change and repent and turn towards Him

God always wants for us a radical reorientation

Transformative faith in Christ

None is excluded from this divine potential

He goes in search of His lost sheep until He finds you – He is not willing to leave any to perish. Infinite means infinite – covers you and those you love

If you are prone to worry that you will never measure up, then you misunderstand.

We do understand, can comprehend, the holy saving intent of His divine sacrifice.

His intent, His wish and His hope is all to heal you, all to give you peace, all to bring you and those you love home.

Brian K Taylor

Why do some receive their miracles quickly while others have to endure?

We don’t know (lovely)

We can choose to learn from our trials, but it is a choice

Trusting in God’s divine purpose brings hope to weary souls

My hands are not the hands that save – those hands belong to the Savior. – Remember the scars His hands bear on your behalf. Don’t look at your scars as a reminder of what you were unable to do.

Stronger faith comes by putting Jesus Christ first

John 16:33 “These things I have spoken unto you, that in me ye might have peace. In the world ye shall have tribulation: but be of good cheer; I have overcome the world.”

Brighter hope comes by envisioning our eternal destiny

Greater power comes by focusing on Joy

“Christs joy eats our trials”

John 14:18 “I will not leave you comfortless: I will come to you.”

His Eye is on the Sparrow

Dallin H. Oaks

The purpose of Temples and the history and role of covenants

Covenants are commitments

Wedding rings are to remind the wearers and others of the covenants made

See the end for the beginning and think Celestial

Temple is to help teach about the plan of salvation and introduce sacred covenants

Covenants do not take a day off!

All things are ours in exaltation

Being bound to Christ can give us strength

Lord, I Would Follow Thee

[redreart]

Everything we know about Staci Pratt

Some time ago, I wrote all the stuff you can possibly know about Staci Pratt (everything that was deleted and hard to notice from the first play). But it was in another language so I decided to translate it lol.

Also, I'm really inspired by @lulu2992 posts, because I'm still obsessed with fc5 lore as well

So, let's begin. I'm going to use some materials from other people on Tumblr and I'm going to leave links to their original posts and mention them in the credits later on.

Everything we CAN find in the game

At the very beginning of the game, while still in the helicopter, Pratt jokes about our Dep and offers Hudson to drink something from a flask, maybe an alcoholic beverage. (maybe the flask is to blame for the helicopter crash, lol). And note that Pratt is the main pilot of the helicopter (because he sits on the right).

Screenshot by @llazyneiph

Based on everything, we can conclude that Stacy is not affected by depression and probably is not a part of Eden's Gate at this point in the game. Although from another angle we can see that the flask he holds in his hands has an Eden's Gate cross on the other side, I assume Ubi were just too lazy to create another texture just for that scene.

Screenshot by @llazyneiph

While leaving the helicopter to go follow the sheriff Pratt may say something if you stay there for too long.

Staci Pratt: Suck it up, rookie! Get your head out of your ass and get up to the church. The fuck you doing? Follow the sheriff. Jesus...

When we meet Stacy after the failed attempt to put Joe in jail, he is already serving Jacob it is not clear why the box does not work on him, although then in one cutscene Only You from the loudspeaker has an effect on him. The game does not provide an answer to this question, although hypothetically this can be associated with deleted content, which will be discussed a little bit later.

Please this this amazing post by @lulu2992 because it summarizes what I want to say here

at.tumblr.com/lulu2992/i-feel-there-is-something-about-deputy-staci/pxihfpi1xgp4

And just a quick thing about Jacob.

In oasistrings (you can find it here text.farcry.info) Jacob call's Pratt "peaches" just once and I found no explanation except my own assumptions.

But the most obvious reason is that Jacob uses this to break Pratt. I mean he's already in a bad state but Jacob is just pushing it further. But also It's interesting that Staci likes Peaches the cougar. She's the only animal companion that he's positive about. This part is kind of cut from the game though because Pratt usually stays in the bunker. But if you'll have him as a companion with the help of the Resistance Mod he'll def comment on the animal you're with.

Another interesting thing was noticed by @hopecountyradio. Idk myself, but it is really worth mentioning. In the very first cutscene with Jacob, someone is carrying our Dep. @hopecountyradio thinks that it is Pratt who does it.

I've made a little collage so you guys can compare the shoes.

Just a bunch of random short facts that ARE in the game

Staci is 26 years old

He wears a wristband

He used to be or is a catholic because he knows the "Ave, Maria" prayer (you can listen to him praying here, Ave, Maria is the second one) which is most common amongst Catholics in the US (thanks @noire610 for telling me this)

Content that was deleted from the game

Let's start with the analysis of audio. Interestingly, not all of this ended up in the oasis strings.

Let's start with this interesting thing provided by @voices-of-hope-county. There are several dialogues between the peggies, Pratt and peggies, and even Jacob and peggies. All of them are united by the fact that they took place (should have happened) in the Veterans Center. Only one of them is available in oasis strings. I could not find the rest in the text file. Let's start.

Audio 1

Dialogue 1 | Audio 1:

Female peggie: Can you fucking believe that guy? Male peggie: Who? FP: The Deputy… Pratt. He was wandering around behind the cages. MP: The fuck was he doing there? FP: Who the hell knows? Jacob's probably got him off doing some shit. MP: Hahahah… He's lucky to put two words together after what Jacob did to him. FP: Seriously… Sometimes I think it's a mistake to put so much trust in this converts. You should come willing to the light, or be struck down. MP: Amen to that, sister.

Dialogue 2 | Audio 1 (can be found in oasisstrings):

Dialogue 3 | Audio 1

Staci Pratt: Hey… I need to get in. Male Peggie: Seriously? Didn't I just let you out? SP: There's a new prisoner… I gotta go get him. For Jacob. MP: Fine… Get going. Just leave me the fuck alone.

Dialogue 4 | Audio 1 (It sounds like Pratt knows the person he's talking to well)

Male Peggie: Don't this fucking dogs ever shut up? Staci Pratt: They're called Judges. MP: They are still fucking dogs. SP: Have you ever seen them kill? Those are more than just dogs, my friend. MP: Well… They still stank like dogs. Good Lord… Huh… Anyone cleans those cages? SP: Are you volunteering? MP: Fuck no! Haha… Are you kidding? SP: Then stop complaining.

Dialogue 5 | Audio 1 (It sounds like Pratt knows the person he's talking to well)

Staci Pratt: How does it look? Male Peggie: Not good. SP: What does that mean? Do we need a new one? MP: Not sure… We might be able to get away with just replacing the belt. SP: Right… And how long will that last? MP: Well… It might buy us a couple weeks. SP: Or… It may just blow up tomorrow. And then where will we be? MP: Up shits creek without a paddle. SP: So what do we tell Jacob? MP: We'll replace the whole fucking thing. It's the only way to be sure.

They're probably repairing a car because they're discussing timing belt.

Although the last dialogue in the audio does not involve Pratt, it does include Jacob and an explanation of how the converts are treated.

Dialogue 6 | Audio 1

Jacob Seed: Anything to report? Male Peggie: Sir. Truck just pulled up n' dropped of a bunck of new prisoners. JS: Recruits. MP: What? JS: We call them recruits. Soon they'll be a part of our army… Part of the Project. You need to respect that. MP: Ye… Yes, Sir. Of course, Sir. JS: I'm going down to see how the process is going. I'll be back soon.

As we can see there was plenty of stuff that should've happened in Jacob's region.

Audio 2

Staci Pratt: It's just gonna get harder… They want an offering. A sacrifice… I'm trying… I'm trying my best. You have to know that!.. I'm sorry.

Probably was talking to our Dep.

Audio 3

Starts after the prayers somewhere around here

Staci Pratt: The whole time I was locked in that room I just kept thinking about how I got here. You know why I became a cop? To get laid. That was it. It was a whim. And then... after awhile, I tried to convince myself that I did it for the greater good. To help people. But I can't. I know that now. Jacob taught me that... I don't know what I'm supposed to do anymore... I don't even know who I am. I don't know what we're supposed to do now. Protect and serve? Out here? There's no law anymore, Rook. Look around! Someone should've been here by now. Nobody gives a shit about what's happening here. We're on our own. Survival of the fittest. Weak and the strong.

(I would love to meet these badge bunnies in Hope County ngl. Probably Adelaide eas one of them)

Also as @lulu2992 notices Pratt's name in game files is spelled Stacy.

Previous character designs

@hopecountyradio extracted a bunch of videos of Pratt's confession.

The first version is this one:

Also in this vid Jacob has greenish eyes

The second version is this one

Has an amazing Eden's Gate intro

And Staci looks like that:

A general conclusion can be drawn from all three versions, incl. the one that was included in the final version of the game, even though the water is hard to see there. Stacy was electrocuted here, so when we rescue him in the Armory that's another reason why he blows the control panel.

Thank ya'll for reading 🖤 I would love to chat about it and add info if you know something/can provide something I haven't mentioned

I used materials from @lulu2992 , @hopecountyradio , @voices-of-hope-county and text.farcry.info