#thank you whoever sent this

[the-whispers-of-death]

I heard ya drank water today? Good job lad, ‘m proud of ya

-Simon

I saw this right after I drank some more water, OMG.

But anyways, thank you, Simon!! Heh, always nice to make someone proud.

Now excuse me while I go scream into a pillow and kick my feet. I’ll be unhinged about this for several HOURS.

[puppygirl-panopticon]

I love my job

[mcytblr-archive]

But is this not just the inherent nature of DreamNotFound? The true reasoning and explanation behind Dream’s sudden onset and terminal case of post-UK trip hesitancy?

It’s Dream sitting at his computer desk in a dark room inside an empty house at some hour that is ungodly in Florida but halfway human in Brighton, jetlagged to hell and back mere days after his return to the US. His heart won’t stop pounding inside his chest, and his fingers tremble as he types, backspaces, then retypes his email to George.

I really enjoyed our time in Brighton, he starts. The pizza was really good.

And it was really good, really, even though all he could focus on the entire time was the body heat that had radiated off George as they sat beside each other in the booth, their thighs almost touching, and their elbows knocking because George was left handed and he was sitting on his right.

And the hug that George had given him when he met him outside the hotel the day after his two-week quarantine ended was amazing. That he had half-expected it to be awkward and uncertain and painful like most real-life meetings were, except it wasn’t. That instead it was almost like two halves reuniting after months, years, and decades apart, the spaces and gaps in their bodies meant to hold the other and be held in return.

He also liked the way their shoulders had brushed when they walked down Brighton’s lively streets, the backs of their hands grazing every other step, heat blooming high on his cheeks when he finally decided, fuck it, and took George’s hand into his, fingers intertwined and palms touching, their skin soft and warmed by the UK’s summer heat.

The kiss they had shared inside the hotel lobby, after Wilbur had left them, was really good as well. He can remember the feeling of George’s face between his hands, their masks pulled down around their necks, his heart pounding in his chest and blood roaring inside his ears, the height difference between them obscene as he started to close the distance between them, actions chaste and fumbling and so painfully and heartrendingly unsure when he stopped to ask, is this okay?

I hope we can still be friends, he types, that our friendship can survive what happened between us in Brighton.

Because he isn’t a Youtuber. Fuck, he isn’t even sure he’s a Twitch streamer.

He hits send.

Lets the weight of his actions befall him, his shoulders slumped and his head resting in his hands, fingers tangled and pulling at the unruly hair at his temples.

A second passes by.

Then another.

He gets a notification.

It moves him from his position of repose as he looks up, moves the mouse to see what—who—it could possibly be.

It’s from George.

Somewhere inside his chest, behind his ribcage, his heart stutters, stops, then starts again—

There’s a single email, a single sentence, on screen, which reads:

"Okay, [redacted]."

Dated: August 21st, 2020

oh my god which member of dreamlying dug this out and sent it to me. i opened my notifications at work and this was like a slap of nostalgia and shock lmao

[harringrove-cafe]

Triple order of Hawkins Heartthrob Apple Pie for mod

Wanna send a treat to someone and continue to spread the love? Order Here

[danwithouttheplan]

The following submission contains a NORMAL ask. Please provide a NORMAL response.

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Hello Dan how are y

Error!4302

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Restarting sequence . . .

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Error!5616

Error!8008

Error!2529

hehe 8008 typing that into my calculator

[zhaozi]

I was with you for most of the points you made on KP's relationship not being the epitome of healthy (even though, and lets be real here, no one came into KP for the healthy relationships) but bullet points 15-17 might be you projecting.

With all due respect.

If you have watched the Filmania trailer, you know that Apo is very good at micro expressions and facial expressions in general. We know what Porsche looks like when he's uncomfortable. Those few minutes in the Filmania trailer where Kinn gropes Porsche and sticks his fingers in his shirt are what Porsche looks like when he's uncomfortable. This is not the case for BeOnCloud's Porsche. He was into it. Yeah, sure, bad timing to grope your partner when you're being shot at, but Porsche was not uncomfortable. Apo knows how to portray discomfort, and that was not it.

As for Kinn "talking bad" about him in front of his parents, I don't think it was meant to be taken that seriously. Porsche didn't take it that seriously and I don't think the audience should feel offended for him if he wasn't. Porsche was smiling and I think that bit was included to show the audience how far their relationship has progressed. From Kinn being exasperated and done with him, to now being completely in love with him, something he thought was impossible at the time due to all the trouble he caused Kinn (in the beginning, on purpose, because he didn't want to be there) at the very beginning.

I also want to say that the ghost thing in the Sidestory was not meant to be taken that seriously either. It was mostly teasing. And to be honest, he used that to get them both closer to each other. We know that if Porsche truly didn't want to stay or was angry with him, he would've left or given him the cold shoulder as he did in in episode 5 after the dubcon/noncon incident. Porsche wanted to truly stay with Kinn (he was lingering and he had shifty body language/unsure eyes) but didn't know how to ask for it or if he even was in a position to ask for it, so Kinn used that as an opportunity to get them to talk and reassure each other that Kinn wants him to stay and that Porsche is allowed to stay. They needed that short conversation and they both wanted that conversation but didn't know how to approach it after the whole forest arc and then being thrust abruptly back into their duties after an emotionally charged life or death situation.

If it makes you feel any better, Kinn came when Porsche called him on the phone when he thought there was a ghost in the room and then went to the temple with him + talked about Tawan to reassure him that it wasn't a ghost and then in episode 13, he let him climb him when he thought Pete was a ghost/zombie. He has never made fun of Porsche for his fear of ghosts...

The thing that is infuriating about some VegasPete-ers is that some of them are saying stuff like "Wow! Vegas, consent king!" Or "VegasPete is still more consensual than KinnPorsche 👀" When that is so severely not the case: The whole drugging Porsche, tying him up and intending to mark him, getting aroused by getting headbutted and almost r*ping him, then we have him licking Pete's neck and touching him and electrocuting his crotch, then touching Pete's ass in the torture dungeon and almost going too far if it wasn't for his father coming in, and then having sex with a prisoner who is chained and truly has no autonomy... like...its not great to use consent as an indicator of why VP is better or superior to KP.

Really, there is no reason to compare VP and KP when they are equally fucked up and like I said, no one came to this show for the healthy relationship dynamics. The only reason there are not more bad things to say about VP's dynamic is because they only got like barely 3 1/2 episodes, surely there would have been more things to criticize about VP if they had had equal screentime as KP.

i appreciate this ask because maybe it will help me understand kinn and porsche more. i'm going to give you the most genuine response i can and maybe try explain my opinions a bit clearer so you can understand where i was coming from. if you still disagree with me, then that's what promotes healthy discourse.

i'm going to try add quotes from your ask as headings because otherwise bits of information might get confusing. bold are quotes from your ask, and any italics are quotes from my original post. i hope that makes this a bit clearer!

'even though, and lets be real here, no one came into KP for the healthy relationship'

i said in the second paragraph of my kinnporsche analysis 'this is a show about the mafia, there was always going to be morality that ranged from black to grey but that doesn’t mean you should accept less than you’re worth in a relationship.' i don't believe that being a criminal or even head of an organised crime family means you forsake every moral fibre in your body; just bc you have no morals when it comes to tax fraud, doesn't mean you're also going to kick a puppy.

bullet points 15-17 might be you projecting.

thank you for numbering them. i probably should have done that in the original post. it was an oversight on my part. i assume by projecting, you mean putting my own negative thoughts and feelings onto their relationship. you might be right. i have a lot of relationship trauma. ive dated criminal men, i've been a victim of rape following ghb, i've been involved in criminal families since i knew how to spell my own name so it's definitely a possibility. does that mean the opinion is invalid though?

If you have watched the Filmania trailer, you know that Apo is very good at micro expressions and facial expressions in general. & Apo knows how to portray discomfort, and that was not it.

i don't think the filmania trailer is entirely relevant here because the authors said between production companies they changed the script to make it more palatable to wider audiences and removed some of the noncon issues, but i see where you're coming from with the acting choices.

these gifs show that the first thing he does is grab kinn's wrist and remove it from his crotch and push it towards where the gun is. is that because he's got a sense of urgency or because he didn't like it; we will never know. that doesn't change that fact that it's a consent issue.

i made a sub-point about me and my partner that i stand by. me and him have been together anywhere between 12 to 24 times as long as kinn and porsche, does that mean they're allowed to grab me whenever they want? no because consent still applies. there's times when implied consent might be there but i don't think that stands in the middle of a territorial battle.

As for Kinn "talking bad" about him in front of his parents, I don't think it was meant to be taken that seriously.

you have a point here. maybe i was offended on behalf of porsche when porsche didn't seem to care. i still think it would be disrespectful in a relationship but maybe it was playful instead. i concede.

I also want to say that the ghost thing in the Sidestory was not meant to be taken that seriously either.

again, you have a point. i still think if you look at this in terms of an actual relationship then it's not great but lets be real they needed a way to push forward the narrative.

The thing that is infuriating about some VegasPete-ers is that some of them are saying stuff like "Wow! Vegas, consent king!" Or "VegasPete is still more consensual than KinnPorsche 👀"

both of those statements are objectively true. when they had sex for the first time (we only see vegaspete have sex once so it's only fair to compare it to kinnporsches first time) vegas waited until pete gave him consent; whether that was through words or through actions doesn't matter. porsche could not consent. he was under the influence of drugs that make you lose your inhibitions and also make your brain foggy as anything.

i'[m going to assume every time after was consensual for both relationships though.

The whole drugging Porsche, tying him up and intending to mark him, getting aroused by getting headbutted and almost r*ping him

my posts were about kinnporsche and vegaspete in their individual relationships. outside of that vegas is a morally black character. i've never denied that.

we have him licking Pete's neck and touching him and electrocuting his crotch, then touching Pete's ass in the torture dungeon

i said in my vegaspete post: 'he caught pete snooping in his house, and as is the way it goes, he punished pete. this is non-negotiable. a ‘crime’ was committed, a punishment must be sought. he didn’t go into this punishment with sexual intent of any kind. to vegas, it was just another day on the job. bodily harm sprinkled with the mental anguish of mixing his grandma into the situation. in terms of criminal families, he did the right thing by their rules/law/policies/code of conduct whichever phrase you want to use.'

the point of punishing someone through torture is to make them wish they hadn't done whatever misdead it is. vegas found the way to do that with pete was mental anguish hence bringing his nan into it and touching him soft/sensually bc pete has been trained for violence.

and almost going too far if it wasn't for his father coming in,

you can't make this point because we can never know. it's not shown that he had sexual intent and we can't attribute it to him unfairly. the same way we cant assume kinn had malice talking bad to porsche's dead parents about porsche.

and then having sex with a prisoner who is chained and truly has no autonomy

once again i addressed this in my vegaspete post so i'll just put it here.

'pete sees vegas who is hurting. in order to distract from that, vegas tries to use sex. this is so unsurprising it borders on stereotypical. he sees hesitation in pete, so he tries to distance himself from it. he attempts to walk away. he is not trying to coerce pete. pete wholeheartedly, with full knowledge of what he is doing, consents to having sex with vegas. he hands vegas the ropes because he wants it, and he knows he is allowed to ask for it without fear of judgement or shame. in that moment pete would have been just as submissive and been restrained just as well by a pair of handcuffs made with paper where the submission is a mental task instead of a physical restriction of movement by rope. make no mistake, pete wanted that to happen.'

The only reason there are not more bad things to say about VP's dynamic is because they only got like barely 3 1/2 episodes, surely there would have been more things to criticize about VP if they had had equal screentime as KP.

this isn't a valid point because it can't be proved. we will never know what the writers would have done if both couples had equal amounts of time.

what were are presented with is a couple who followed through the processes of normal criminal families, overcame that (if pete chose to forgive vegas, that's his choice), had consensual sex, separated and suffered with the consequences and then had a relationship of their own volition; and a couple who started with lies and coercion, continued with rape, porsche was shown to have residual issues from that (the lighter to the lips scene), he was punished for being raped, he decided to go into a relationship anyway where he was lied too and manipulated.

no one is saying either relationship is the pinnacle of health. i was talking about how i saw more unhealthy behaviours in kinn and porsche's relationship than i did in vegas and pete's relationship.

i appreciate the ask, i genuinely do. you've made me rethink and rescind two of the points i made. it's given me a space to think about kinn and porsche more objectively. so i'm grateful.

i find the entire topic of relationships within criminal families utterly fascinating. i liked the show and i can't wait for season two. hopefully they will be healthier and happier in it.

[glassrunner]

congratulation. you have been visited. by the permit crab. you may do one (1) bad thing today.

… I am tempted to steal from the employee store. For legal reasons, this is a joke.

[none-ofthisnonsense]

The Rum Tum Tugger

Thank you!! (This is actually my first anon ask)

Sadly I don't know enough celebrities to really have a celebrity crush.

(I am partial to Saoirse Ronan or Emmy Raver-Lampman though. And Stephanie Beatriz.)

[psy-ay-ay]

if you receive this, you make somebody happy! go on anon and send this to ten of your followers who make you happy or somebody you think needs cheering up. if you get one back, even better! 💕

:)))))))))

[dentalhickory]

You're the best

Around

Never gonna let you down!

[butterflybabiie]

Your style is so cute and your makeup is very pretty!

this is very sweet thank youu 💕💕

[untitled-byler-blog]

Surprise!

You’re somebody’s favorite blog!

- The Byler Praise Team 🌸

😭😭😭😭

[ruushes]

goofy fun pranking times ahead

[motelofmermaids]

I love your writing sm and was wondering if you could right a Finnick x reader where she’s not very experienced and he has to teach her how to ride him and is just super fluffy and sweet? 🫶🫶

this is such a good request… oh my lord. (this is so long, my apologies, but this had my brain WORKING!)

it started off with you in finnick’s kitchen, sitting at the table with an open book disregarded to the side. you were picking at your nails, nervousness racking at you, knee softly bouncing. finnick was out, helping a local fisher distribute catch to the neighboring shops. you weren’t sure when he’d return, but curiosity and nerves prickled under your skin; your face and neck hot from the previous chapter you’ve read in that book. it was a novel that caught your attention at the market a few days ago, the owner promising a ‘good time with that lil’ gem.’ so, with little to no persuasion, you bought it.

it was a beautiful read, as far as you’ve gotten. until you reached a chapter where the main character had a girl on top, riding him—the man doing hardly any work. you gasped, immediately pushing it off to the side. it wasn’t a lie that you lacked the experience, finnick loved you no less, of course. however, it didn’t help the guilt that tickled at your lower stomach, always letting him do the work. as skilled as that man was, with you not even coming close. you had sighed, slumping a little bit lower into the chair. wondering what you’d be like in the woman’s position, you assumed it’d be as artistic as the main character described it. how the lady’s thighs would shake, but she was persistent, chasing her own pleasure she had earned from working so hard.

you heard the door open, immediately sitting up and head snapping towards the direction of finnick’s appearance greeting you. “hey,” you squeaked out, before clearing your throat and going quiet. kicking off his boots, finnick’s brows knitted together in question. “hey, honey…,” he took in your nervous and rigged state, letting out a worried, “you okay?” either be honest with him or stay quiet, you thought, your eyes leaving his to examine that dangerous novel. he called your name, approaching you slowly, thoughts running between one assumption to the next. “uhm,” you started, before reaching out for the book, turning a few pages back, “can you—uh, please read this.” and finnick nodded, taking the book from you.

a few minutes had passed, only hearing the sounds of pages turning and your own labored breathing. “okay,” finnick said, setting the book down gently and turning to you. he crouched down when you refused to look up at him, so he was at a level to properly see you. “are you okay? did that make you uncomfortable? i can return it—,” you cut him off before he could continue, looking down at him and saying, “i want to do that.” finnick couldn’t help the small curl of his lips, face visibly softening from his own previous anxieties. “with you,” you clarified, hands reaching out and cupping his face. “i’d assume so,” he mumbled before leaning in to kiss you.

he had taken you to the room, reassuring you almost twenty times since you’ve situated yourself, still clothed, on his lap that you could stop anytime. you nodded, shutting him up by kissing him. it went on for a while, kissing him, until you experimented and ground down onto him. the friction was oh so sweet, and you continued at a slow pace. you moaned into his mouth, nipping at his bottom lip. finnick’s hands reached under your shirt, hands gripping onto the soft fat of your hips as he pulled you down—grinding up against you. “more, need more,” you breathed out. it didn’t take long for finnick to undress you, disregarding his own clothes somewhere. it also didn’t take long for you to reposition him against the headboard because, “i want you to be comfortable.” he smiled, giving your forehead a soft kiss as you lined yourself up against him.

when you lowered yourself onto him, tip entering your wet heat, you wondered why you were so nervous. it felt like any other time you and finnick had shared the bed together—until he started getting deeper. until he started reaching places missionary wouldn’t allow. “oh,” you exhale out, finally bottoming out against his base. it was so much all at once, your eyes slipping shut as your forehead fell to his shoulder. “sweetheart,” he groaned out, clenching his teeth when you fluttered around him. “how are you feeling? is this okay?” and you nodded, “just need a minute,” you whispered. after a few moments, you experimentally moved your hips. letting out a small whimper, you repositioned to hold onto his shoulders, head moving up to look him in the eyes. “you feel so good,” he leaned closer to mumble against your lips. his words encouraged you, hips starting to pick up a soft pace of moving up and down.

finnick’s eyes were so full of love, never looking away from you. his hands move up to your waist, grip slightly tightening as he helped you—noticed your thighs starting to tremble. “you’re so good, pretty girl,” he moaned, setting a pace himself to meet yours. “always know how to make me feel good,” and you threw your head back, nails digging little crescents into his shoulders. his mouth found your neck, leaving wet and messy kisses against the smooth skin. “finn,” you sobbed, becoming sloppy with your movements, so close to reaching that high finnick introduced you to. “that’s it, like that,” he encouraged against your neck, feeling his blissed out grin. you clenched around him, one hand coming down to play with your abandoned clit.

“fuck,” finnick murmured, thrusting up into your tight heat as he fell over the edge. you soon followed after, your fingers on your clit being brushed away by finnick to replace them with his own. “good girl, such a good girl for me,” he talked you through it, your thighs shaking as your chest fell up and down against his. when you came, you swear you saw stars, the whole world becoming so small—only you two existed.

that novel was right, riding is a form of art.

[mysaintkitten]

Little Secret | Neil Lewis x fem!reader

prompt: neil is your sisters boyfriend, but that doesn’t stop you from developing a slight crush on him (this is based off a suggestion that was sent to me !! thank you to whoever sent it !!) (NSFW, NO MINORS!)

WARNINGS: veeery slight age gap (unspecified ages but reader is implied to be younger, everyones legal), cheating, loss of virginity, unprotected sex (p in v), creampie

word count: 3.8k

neil and your sister had been dating for about 4 months now, still very much in its fresh-honeymoon stage. in those 4 months, you two had been around each other a few times but hadn’t really spoken to each other directly. you’d be in the same conversations, but that’s really all that would happen.

it wasn’t until somehow, the two of you were left alone in the living room of your house a few hours before your parents were planning to hold a family gathering, neil being your sisters plus one. you’re sitting on one side of the couch and he sits on the other, you’re physically as far apart as you can within the couches armrests. your sister had temporarily left due to a minor emergency situation, she had realized that she had no solo cups or paper plates for the family gathering tonight, and your parents were at the liquor store buying alcohol for the gathering.

for a while, you just sat in silence. if you were being honest, you thought neil was pretty cute, but you felt so guilty about it. so you just tried your best to avoid him. he was just a few years older, nothing significant that would make people look twice, but the more dominating factor was that he was with your sister. whenever you felt yourself staring at him, or tweaking your appearance when he’d look away, you’d remind yourself: he’s with your sister.

as the two of you sat in silence, he eventually breaks it by blowing a weak raspberry through his lips and stirring up a conversation,

“sooo …” he starts, eyes scanning around the room before bringing them to you, “see any interesting movies lately?” he asks, you refrain from chuckling. of course he’s asking about movies. but, it’s his main interest and he’s trying to be nice, so you engage.

“uh, yeah, actually!” you respond, looking down at your hands in your lap was you fiddled with your thumbs, “watched fantastic planet, i thought it was really cool.”

“wow, really?” he responds, his words almost sound sarcastic, but when you look up at him he has a partially impressed expression on his face. you blush slightly, temporarily basking in the fact that you gave him an answer he approved of. your sister wasn’t as in to movies as either of you were, which was a bit of a tolling factor on his relationship with her.

“i like fantastic planet too, you seen any other french films? like la haine?” he questions, his body language becoming more relaxed,

you perk up slightly, “yeah! i loved la haine!” you beamed, turning your body inwards to face him better, you did really enjoy cinema but you didn’t have anyone to talk about it with.

he smiles at you warmly and then scans you up and down, before he can say anything you hear the front door unlock and your sister comes in, “oh, my god! you won’t believe what i saw!” she exclaims from the front door. his gaze stays on you for a few more moments before he breaks it to go help your sister out with the bags. you watch him as he leaves. you feel an uncontrollable smile spread across your lips and you scurrying up to your room, not wanting to face your sister and be reminded of the fact that these feelings are guaranteed to lead to nothing.

once upstairs, you start getting ready. you shower and shave, change into a nicer outfit, a cute little dress. overall modest, but showed enough to hopefully peak neil’s intrest, and do your hair and makeup.

you’re patient, making sure you look as nice as possible, nearly missing the beginning of the get together to finish getting ready.

as you’re putting your earrings in, you’re subconsciously thinking about what neil would like. does he like slutty? does he like modest? you don’t want to make it obvious, but you want him to like what he sees.

after a few drinks, it sets in that the gathering is a bit of a let down. neil didn’t look at you once. it was almost like he was avoiding you. the conversations were boring, and you were tired of asking the same dull questions about your life and your future. you decided it was best for you to just sneak back up to your room. your parents and sister were enjoying the company, you didn’t want to kill their vibe.

once in your room, you strip yourself of your dress and slip into a loose tee and some pyjama shorts, proceeding to climb back into bed and scroll on your phone.

suddenly, your bedroom door swings open, and there neil is.

you both stare at each other, “oh, sorry, i thought this was the bathroom.” he said, blatantly lying, he’s been to your house numerous times, he knew exactly where the bathroom was. but how’d he know which room was yours? had he been doing trial and error without you knowing?

you break eye contact and glance around your room trying to figure out what words to say, feeling a blush creep across your cheeks, you notice in your peripheral that he’s walking into your room now, beginning to shut the door behind him,

“uh, well ..” you start, “it isn’t, i can take you to the actual bathroom if you’d like ..” you joke lightly, attempting to calm your own nerves, he smiles at you,

“that’s alright, i don’t really have to go, anyway.” he responds, looking at all the small trinkets you have scattered throughout your room, “why’d you leave?”

oh, so he did notice you.

“i guess it just wasn’t really my vibe .. things didn’t go exactly as planned i suppose.” laughing weakly, again, just trying to break the tension. you’re not even sure if there’s actual tension or if it’s just your nerves, either way, you’re trying to calm yourself down.

“what did you have planned?” he asks, he’s standing directly beside your bed at this point, picking up and toying with little things he’s found on your nightstand.

“uhh ..” you murmur, trying to conjure up a believable lie. you can’t just say, “oh, i tried my best to look hot so you’d look at me, but you didn’t, so i went upstairs.” so you settle with, “i just wasn’t expecting every conversation to revolve around my future, you know? i mean maybe that’s excepted of older family members, they just want what’s best-“ you ramble, and you realize you’re rambling way too far into your sentence.

“sorry” you giggle, he grins at you and chuckles softly, “in summary, the conversations were tedious. i’d rather just be in my room.”

he sighs, “yeah, i get that”, he places the small objects back on your nightstand and adjusts them to how they were before he picked them up. then, to your surprise, he sits on the edge of your bed, “your sisters having a nice time talking with the other girls, i felt a bit out of place so i told them i was heading up to the bathroom, they didn’t really notice though.” he adds, his comment about your sister brought you back down to earth. oh, yeah, my sister, your girlfriend.

you shift away from him slightly, feeling yourself becoming antsy. he had never been this close to you before, he had never been in such a personal space with you before, neither of you knew each other like that, yet here you were.

“oh .. haha ..” you mutter, your eyes are actively avoiding him, you’ve convinced yourself that as long as you don’t look at him he won’t realize how nervous you are. as if he read your mind, you hear him say, “wait, look at me.”

you gulp slightly and shift your head and your gaze towards him, making direct eye contact with him. his eyes drift down to your lips and he brings his thumb forward, gently swiping it against the edge of your bottom lip.

you don’t breathe, his eyes on you and his thumb on your lip is a bit much for your psyche to handle, your eyes shift away, keeping your head in place for him.

he notices your eyes shifting and he chuckles, “what? am i that hideous?”

your eyes widen slightly while looking back at him “no, no no! it’s not that!” you explain frantically, “it’s uh … kinda ..” you start, your voice trailing off as you realize what you were just about to admit to him. he doesn’t let you stop though, he continues to pry.

“kinda … what?” he asks, raising his brows, “kinda .. the opposite.” you choke out, feeling your cheeks burn with embarrassment, you definitely can’t look at him at this point.

you shift away from him more, tucking your knees up to your chest, the silence is eating away at you.

“look, i’m sorry, i think you should go, i shouldn’t have-“ you blab, desperately trying to dig yourself out of this hole you’ve created.

“(y/n), (y/n), breathe, it’s alright.” he coos, placing his hand on your shoulder in attempt to calm you down, “no shame in a little attraction, we’re only human, after all.” he adds, rubbing your arm gently.

“but you’re taken, neil ..” you whisper, “by my sister, at that!”

he doesn’t really respond to that, he returns to his original point, “we feel how we feel. you can’t control that.”, as he speaks he brings himself closer to you, his torso is mere inches away from your tucked-up legs.

“you know ..” he says, staring down at your bed while tracing small patters on your comforter with his finger, “actually i don’t think i should say ..” he laughs weakly. your curiosity peaks. “no, go on, i had to say what i was thinking, it’s your turn.” you coax, relaxing your body language a bit.

he sighs, “well .. you aren’t too bad yourself, not bad at all actually ..” he looks back up at you, shifting his gaze between your eyes and your lips. your hearts pounding, you’re worried he might be able to hear it, “oh, stop .. you’re just saying that ..” you mumble, nudging him playfully.

“i’m not!” he laughs, “really, i think you’re very attractive .. you probably get that all the time though.”

you scoff and cross your arms in front of your body, “definitely not ..”

his brows stitch together in disbelief, “what? you’re telling me you don’t have guys trailing after you constantly?”, you shake your head no. he huffs and scoots closer, directly beside you now.

you chat for a while, almost completely forgetting about the gathering and the fact that your sister, his girlfriend, is downstairs, but neither of you care at this point. you begin to discuss your shared interest, movies.

he brings up trainspotting, and you nearly lose it, unleashing all of your retained trainspotting-knowledge onto him.

he can tell how into it you are, he watches you attentively as you ramble, making sure to nod every now and then so you know he’s listening and following along.

“and you know, for the toilet scene, they actually used chocolate an-“ you’re cut of by his lips on yours, you immediately forget whatever trainspotting trivia you were about to say to him, which knowing his love for film, he probably already knew all of the facts you told him. but he sat and listened anyway.

he pulls away, and he smirks slightly at the surprised expression on your face.

“neil ..” is all you can manage to mutter out before his lips are back on yours again, kissing you a bit more deeper, testing his limits. he pulls back again for a moment, “is this alright?” he hums, his lips nearly grazing yours. “my sister ..” you whine, he just chuckles and kisses you again. at this point, you’ve fully pushed your morals aside.

his kisses start to get deeper and his tongue starts to explore your mouth, you moan at the new sensation, you hadn’t been intimate with anyone before and things were moving rather quickly.

his lips move over to your cheek, down to your jawline and then to your neck where he suckles on the skin softly while creeping his hand between your legs.

you grab his wrist and halt his actions, “neil, i’ve never done this before ..” you confess,

he groans into your neck, his hot breath sending chills throughout your body, “i’ll be gentle, sweetheart ..” he mumbles, licking a flat stripe onto your neck before continuing to place his wet kisses on the skin. he wouldn’t admit it out loud, but the thought of stripping you of your innocence made him harder.

you’re undeniably wet, your mind is racing, neil’s mouth, his hands, his cock, your sister, your family downstairs, you can’t focus on one distinct thing until you feel neil’s fingers slip into your panties.

you gasp quietly, feeling his skilled fingers toy with your pussy, “no one’s touched here before?” he asked, pulling his head out from your neck to look down at his hand in your pants, using his free hand to palm his aching bulge, “n-no .. just me ..” you whimper as he starts to rub small circles onto your clit, he smirks before whispering “ever think about me when you touch yourself?”. you nod, biting your lip, screwing your eyes shut to avoid looking at him.

he chuckles lowly, “dirty little thing .. lemme get these off”, he takes his fingers off your clit and hooks them into your waistband, you whimper in disapproval at the loss of contact. as you lift your hips to aid him in the removal, you lower them back down and spread your legs, bending them slightly.

he falls silent and your eyes open back up, you see him crawling to get between your legs, your holes are on a perfect display for him, you’ve never been so exposed in front of anyone before, but you’ve also never felt so aroused.

as his eyes scan you wet pussy, he brings his fingers back up, sliding his middle finger up and down your folds, “touch yourself for me, baby, i wanna see.” he purrs, teasing your opening with his finger. you whine, placing your hand between your legs and rubbing your clit timidly, a bit embarrassed to be doing it right in front of him. as you start to touch yourself, he begins to fuck you with his finger, watching as you clench desperately around his lone digit.

he’s absolutely infatuated with you, as you stare down at him between your legs he looks almost hypnotized.

“wish you had told me sooner .. would’ve touched you ages ago ..” he groans, adding another finger in, you whine slightly, stopping the movements on your clit.

neil shoves his fingers fully in, keeping them knuckle deep inside of you, “did i say you could stop?” he breathed, gently running the tips of his fingers along your leg.

you resume your movements, and he speeds up his while smirking “good girl.” he praises, he shifts onto his knees while keeping his fingers inside you, he brings his hand up to your face and cups your cheek.

he runs his thumb along your cheek sweetly before bringing his thumb to your lips, brushing against the skin, “open.” neil nearly whispers, you comply, sucking his thumb into your mouth.

you bat your eyelashes at him and suck his thumb in the most seductive way you can, despite having no experience, he likes what he sees. “jesus, (y/n) ..” he mutters, twisting his fingers inside you while trusting them in a bit harsher. “shit, neil!” you moan around his thumb, “you want more than my fingers, sweetheart?”, you whimper and nod, “hm? use your words, baby.” he hums.

you whine, “y-yes, i want more than your fing-ers ..”

“what do you want to fill you up instead?” he pries while taking his thumb out of your mouth and bringing that hand down to palm himself, smirking like the smug little fuck he is, you whimper louder, shifting your hips in front of him.

“neil ..” you huff, he just chuckles “come on, tell me what you want in that little pussy.”

you can barely manage to get the words out, embarrassment and arousal battling within your brain, but thanks to neil’s sweet little touches and words- arousal wins.

“y-our cock ..” you whisper, turning your head to the side. he groans quietly, “my, what, sweetheart? speak up.”

“your cock, neil!” you mewl, your desperation flooding all your other senses. he chuckles, “good girl, was that so bad?” he jokes before taking his fingers out of you, leaving you feeling empty, as he undoes his pants and hastily tugs them down. his hard cock springs out, you’re a bit intimidated by his size. he’s not huge, but he’s definitely big, and you’ve never had sex before, so your nerves were definitely starting to act up.

he scoots himself forward and lines himself up between your legs, rubbing your slick up and down with the head of his dick.

“aw, you nervous?” he teases, you don’t respond, you just whine, “you’ll take it all, like a good girl, huh?” he coos, sliding himself inside you slowly. “what about protection, neil?” you mewl, he laughs, “what, you think your sisters dirty, or something? i’m clean, darling.”

god, he’s disgusting. before you can respond, you gasp loudly at the stretch and slight burning sensation, “oh my ..” you huff, forgetting about whatever you were just bickering about. he hasn’t even bottomed out yet. he pauses for a moment, still only halfway inside you, to lean his body forward and place his hand beside your head, placing small kisses on your lips and cheek.

“doing so good, just a little more ..” he moans, using his free hand to rub your thigh soothingly.

finally, he bottoms out, you look down between your legs and then back up at him. he’s blushing himself, and he has a stupid little grin on his face. “feels nice ..” he groans before sliding himself out a bit, quickly thrusting back in. you moan at the mixture of pleasure and pain, feeling so incredibly full by neil’s cock. he speeds up more, making your moans louder and your body twitch beneath him. “god fu-ck, neil!” you nearly shout, he brings his hand up from beside your head and covers your mouth, “i know it feels good, sweetheart, but you gotta be quiet, okay? can’t let everyone downstairs know you’re getting pounded up here.” he taunts, knowing exactly how his thrusts are effecting you.

“mhmm!” you whine from underneath his hand, he moans and his shoulders go slack, “so fucking tight ..”

you grip the wrist of the hand that’s over your mouth, grunting and whining into his palm, while exhaling harshly through your nose.

he takes his hand off your mouth and moves it to your neck, gripping the sides gently. you stitch your brows together and watch him fuck into you through half-lidded eyes. “how does this feel, baby?” he purrs, dragging his nails along your thigh with his free hand.

you moan, not loudly, but loud enough for him to hear.

“good .. ‘s so good ..” you whimper, finding it hard to speak due to the circumstances.

“think you can come on my cock for me, hm?” he grunts, bringing his lips to yours before kissing you sloppily. you not as best you can and moan against his lips, neil takes his hand off your neck and brings it between your legs and promptly rubbing your clit, making you moan even louder again this lips.

“neil! shit!” you whine, clenching around him involuntarily. he moans weakly, placing his forehead against yours.

“‘m gonna come .. god, fuck!” he groans, pumping into you harder while continuing to rub your clit, you’re close too- but so close that you really can’t verbalized it. you just hope he knows, and he does. with a few breathy moans, he’s coming inside you. he pauses for a few moments to pull his body back up, but his thrusts don’t slow down, he’s maintaining his rough pace while rubbing on your clit, eager to get you to come for him.

“drench my cock, sweetheart, show me how good it feels.” he praises, looking down at himself fucking you.

you don’t need much more than that, you’re coming around his cock and you’re coming hard. harder than you ever have. maybe because prior all your orgasms had been from your own hands, but neil’s hands and words and cock gave you an orgasm that was unlike anything you had felt before. your mind goes blank and your body tenses up, small huffs and ‘fuck’s falling from your mouth as your orgasm crashes through you.

“there you go .. that’s it .. all over me baby ..” he coos, watching in fascination as you come undone on his cock.

once you’ve ridden your orgasm out, he pulls his softening cock out, making you wince, “sorry, i’m sorry ..” he mumbles, running his fingers along your thigh calmingly. “god, look at that ..” he groans, mostly to himself, as he spreads your lips apart and watches as the come behind to spill out of you. he gets up off the bed and begins to button up his pants, adjusting his appearance in the mirror before heading to the door.

“i’ll get you a wet rag and get you cleaned up, after that i’ve gotta go back downstairs.” he says, his hand already on the doorknob, “wait!” you respond, he turns his body to face you fully.

“what was that? what’s this?” you ask, leaving the question rather vague for a reason, “i mean .. i would like to keep this going .. i won’t tell if you won’t ..” he whispers slightly, as if nows the time he needed to be quiet. you would like to see him more often, you wanna feel how you felt more often. so you nod, “okay, i won’t either.” you whisper back.

he smiles, “sounds good. can you swing by my video store sometime this week? we could chat, watch a few films ..” he bubbled, seemingly giddy at the idea of spending time with you. “yeah, definitely!” you grin back as he heads out the door to grab the wet rag.

the post-nut clarity begins to sink in. you just slept with your sisters boyfriend. how are you ever going to face her again? how awful of a person can you be to do something like this? what’s done is done, you tell yourself, you’ve already been an awful sister. so fuck it. let’s keep this going.

——

it’s 3 am heeeeyyyy

[yrsonpurpose]

Alex & Henry's Playlist ♡