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#that dawning fear slowly catches up..knowing that all of their experience will be nothing more than a memory
blabberoo · 4 months
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You've done this before...
Countless of times...
Why now?
Bonus :)
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1K notes · View notes
versadies · 3 years
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Hey hey!! I've been following you for a while now and I love your work sm aaa
Saw the event, I love soulmate au's 😩‼ as a gemini, may I request a gemini prompt + kaeya? Up to you who the enemy is, I trust you ^ ^
-🦚 @pavo-ocell-me
someday, one day (hc scenario)
penpal: omg hi !! im glad u love my work, i hope this is to ur liking 🙌
prompt: gemini the twins, enemy-lover soulmate au
pairing/s: kaeya x gn!reader
sypnosis: when you thought he was your enemy but is actually your lover.
includes: spoilers on diluc and kaeya's backstory, spoilers on genshin's official webtoon, violence, physical pain, burns, arguing, enthusiastic!diluc (pls take note that its canon that he USED to be like all the other pyro characters b4 his father's death.),
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when you first met diluc, it felt like he was your knight in shining armor.
the first time you two met was when you accidentally fell down from your balcony after leaning too much on the railing and diluc managed to catch you bridal-style whilst he was on patrol around the city as a knight.
it truly was romantic– and a near-death experience for you.
so when you found out that his name is imprinted on your wrist, you felt ecstatic, and so did he.
since then, you two were known as the youngest soulmates who had found each other in mondstadt, people admiring your relationship with envy and happiness.
of course, you and diluc were a happy couple. although you would be lying if you said diluc is overall your type, you managed to find yourself falling in love with the man.
when crepus, diluc's father, found out about diluc's once-in-a-lifetime moment, he simply laughs and pats you and his son by your backs with a proud smile.
"by the time my son turns 18, we better make arrangements of your wedding! it's a ragnvindr tradition, after all." he comments eagerly. you honestly weren't sure if the man was joking or not.
it didn't take long before you meet his dear brother, kaeya.
when you find out his brother's name is the same as the one that's imprinted on your other wrist, being surprised is far from your reaction.
"don't worry about it, y/n." diluc reassures you one night as the two of you stroll around the city together. "i'll make sure nothing will go wrong between you and my brother. besides, you always have me, right?"
if diluc hadn't tried what he said, perhaps things would've gone differently than now.
in fear of being enemies with your future brother-in-law, you decided to avoid kaeya like a plague, giving the young man apologetic looks whenever you walk away from his presence.
as much as you're avoiding the man, you couldn't imagine hating on kaeya. every night, you always think of what can make kaeya your enemy. what is there to hate him? he's funny, chivalrous, everything that screams your type of men.
wait.. type?
your heart drops from the moment you started thinking romantic things about diluc's brother, looking behind you to see your soulmate sleeping soundly with a frown plastered on your face.
is diluc really your lover?
doubts started to cross your mind. what if diluc isn't your soulmate? what is there to prove that kaeya is your enemy? are you just overthinking things?
"i can't think about this." you murmured to yourself, pulling up your comforter before laying back down on your bed and try to fall asleep.
"i have a wedding to worry about next year."
just as you said, you did try not to think about the possibilities you have with the two brothers, distracting yourself with tasks and dates with your lover, who's quite oblivious to your problems going on inside your head.
unnoticed by you, you weren't the only one who has been burdened with your thoughts.
by the time diluc's birthday has arrived, the two of you started to get excited from your future wedding, excited to finally marry each other after years of spending your adolescence together.
you didn't expect an inconvenience during diluc and crepus's trip.
you didn't expect crepus trying to save diluc from a monster using something that no one but snezhnaya has ever heard of.
you didn't expect crepus asking diluc to put him out of his misery.
you didn't expect diluc to come strolling back to your shared home with blood stained in his clothing at a late hour.
you never, ever, expected your lover to fight his own brother when he took a visit.
and you did not expect your lover to plan on leaving you and everyone.
"what do you mean you're... you're leaving?" you ask in disbelief, staring at diluc as though he has two heads. "can't i go with you–?"
"no, this journey will be too dangerous for you–"
"this applies to you as well! you're not an immortal or some god–"
"i can do this on my own, y/n." he says with his eyes narrowed. you couldn't help but scoff in disbelief. this isn't the diluc you know and loved.
"but diluc.. isn't this too much? your father... i know crepus's death is too much but, why can't you stay?" you whispered, cupping his cheeks. "what about our wedding? the life you and i planned after your bi–"
"my father died and you're seriously thinking about our wedding?!" diluc forces your hands away from his face, glaring at you. "why can't you understand that i'm trying to find out the truth on this delusion–"
"i do understand!" you yelled out. "i do understand that you want to do this for him but what about monstadt? the knights? what about your brother–"
"HE'S NOT MY BROTHER!" he yelled, lashing out at you as you screamed in surprise when you saw fire in front of you, immediately covering your face with your arms out of reflex.
you didn't notice how your lover's eyes widens on what he did,
you couldn't notice him, not when you're too focused on the huge burns on your arms.
"oh my god..." diluc murmurs, slowly taking a few steps back as he takes a look of what he did, ignoring the sudden presence of adelaide and elzer, who both gasped from the scene.
your eyes starts to water from the intense pain, trying not to cry out and scream your heart out in fear of making your lover feel regret. you could honestly care less on what diluc is doing, all you could think about was the intense burns from your arms.
suddenly, the door was slammed open by kaeya– who was wet from the rain outside.
"what the hell did you do to them?!" kaeya exclaims, running towards you with a shocked look on his face. "i'll take you to the cathedral alright? the sisters will heal you." he whispers, wiping off the tears from your face as he wraps his arm around your shoulder and takes you towards the doors.
before diluc could let out a word from his mouth, kaeya gives him a glare.
"you may hate me for what happened," kaeya says.
"but for celestia's sake, don't ever come to them or call them your lover ever again."
that was the last time you saw diluc.
you eventually find out from the chattering nuns that the man had already left monstadt with no news of when he'll return, causing everyone to pity you and for diluc about what happened.
you were thankful that no one except the nuns found out about the incident of your arms.
throughout your stay in the cathedral, you usually find kaeya beside you, keeping an eye on you with a concerned look on his face. you honestly couldn't imagine what would've happened if the man didn't storm inside dawn winery. would diluc actually try to help you later on and leave? would you have suffered more with your injuries as he stands by watching you in disbelief?
whatever outcome you could think of, your heart ached from them all.
would diluc stayed had he been the one who tries to take care of your injuries?
either way, you knew the man is no longer the one you fell in love with from those years ago.
as years grew by, so did your friendship with kaeya.
although it was awkward from the start, you eventually warmed up to the man who you thought is your enemy, feeling more comfortable with him than before.
the two of you started having careers by then, with you having a successful career whilst kaeya becomes the calvary captain of the knights of favonius.
although the two of you are busy, you agreed to always meet each other at night in angel's share, where you drink the night away and talk about anything that comes out of your minds.
there wasn't a day when you thought about diluc.
thankfully, your burns weren't too severe and is slowly fading away throughout the years. but that doesn't mean the memories you had from it disappeared as well.
ever since that dreadful night, you started having nightmares about the incident, always finding yourself sitting up from your bed with a scared look on your face.
you wished you didn't want to see diluc this way, but you honestly couldn't bare to face him if he ever comes back to the city.
you don't see him as a lover or a friend. all he is to you at this very moment is your nightmare.
your nightmares simply washes away when kaeya comes up in your mind.
whenever you think about your so-called destined enemy, you felt comforted and safe. it was understandable really! you were touched by how he took care of you regardless of you being his "enemy".
however... now that you could think about it, the calvary captain has a lot more common with you than diluc himself. the fact that his brother made you laugh a lot and supported you in many ways made you started thinking that maybe diluc really isn't your destined lover.
your heart skips a beat from the thought of kaeya being your true lover, the smile you wore never fading away.
perhaps when you're finally starting to move on from the relationship you had with diluc, maybe... just maybe, kaeya could be the one you've been hoping for.
you started to sleep more peacefully, excited for the future that awaits.
somewhere in the calvary captain's home, the man is dreaming and hoping of you too.
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fatuilady · 3 years
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— 𝐦𝐨𝐧𝐝𝐬𝐭𝐚𝐝𝐭 𝐛𝐨𝐲𝐬 - 𝐡𝐮𝐠𝐠𝐢𝐧𝐠. (headcanons)
✦ word count : 2.6𝐤
✦ feat : 𝐆𝐍 𝐫𝐞𝐚𝐝𝐞𝐫 , [𝐠𝐞𝐧𝐬𝐡𝐢𝐧 𝐢𝐦𝐩𝐚𝐜𝐭] 𝐚𝐥𝐛𝐞𝐝𝐨, 𝐛𝐞𝐧𝐧𝐞𝐭𝐭, 𝐝𝐢𝐥𝐮𝐜, 𝐤𝐚𝐞𝐲𝐚, 𝐫𝐚𝐳𝐨𝐫, 𝐯𝐞𝐧𝐭𝐢
✦ context : 𝐚𝐥𝐥 𝐚𝐛𝐨𝐮𝐭 𝐡𝐨𝐰 𝐨𝐮𝐫 𝐥𝐨𝐯𝐞𝐥𝐲 𝐦𝐨𝐧𝐝𝐬𝐭𝐚𝐝𝐭 𝐛𝐨𝐲𝐬 𝐡𝐮𝐠 𝐲𝐨𝐮 ~
✦ cw : 𝐢𝐧𝐭𝐢𝐦𝐚𝐜𝐲, 𝐩𝐡𝐲𝐬𝐢𝐜𝐚𝐥 𝐭𝐨𝐮𝐜𝐡 𝐚𝐧𝐝 𝐬𝐥𝐢𝐠𝐡𝐭 𝐬𝐮𝐠𝐠𝐞𝐬𝐭𝐢𝐯𝐞 𝐮𝐧𝐝𝐞𝐫𝐭𝐨𝐧𝐞𝐬 𝐟𝐨𝐫 𝐬𝐨𝐦𝐞 (kaeya lol)
✦ note : apologies this one took so long, work had been swamping me ;-; ! quite long, pretty wordy, almost oneshots, but i hope you all enjoy anyway :)
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𝖆𝖑𝖇𝖊𝖉𝖔 :
✦ This particular chalk prince is all too enthralled with delicacy. His very mantra is all about the fragility of life and creation, surely, you're no exception. He has a unique fascination with life and death, yet seemed to focus little on the precious moments between the cradle and the grave.
✦ Albedo is always gentle, shy and chaste when he embraces you.
✦ At first, he was unfamiliar with the sentiment as social contact had never been his forte, since he was in fact a wall of stone (or chalk?). He'd declined your open offer from his own inexperience, he failed to consider that it may portray him as cold, distant or unwelcoming.
✦ Soon enough, Albedo would begin to ponder how such a simple interaction could bring strong emotion to humankind, yet the more he dwelled upon it, the more he found his arms feeling empty. It was as if his hypothesis was proving itself wrong.
✦ Eventually, he'd come to terms with his growing curiosity, always one to initiate an experiment, he'd offer himself to return the affections - he was very glad he did.
✦ Albedo's coy nature would let him drape one arm around your shoulder, the other taking your hand. He'd wrap his soft hands around your own, placing his head beside your own. His hair would smell soft, newborn and clean, the scent of fresh cotton, baby powder and angel feathers beside your nose as he buried into you.
✦ The chalk prince unfortunately would struggle to find the time for such intimacy on the regular, but when he did find the chance to embrace you, he'd make them last as long as he could.
✦ Perhaps this still lingered from his limited understanding of social cues, but he'd hold onto you for many minutes, more than you could count on one hand. Taking you in his arms, he would touch you as if you were a blooming Cecelia, tenderly and lovingly. You'd return his care, cuddling him and wrapping both arms around his back.
✦ During his hugs, he'd also sometimes find himself tracing over your body with inquisitive hands. Albedo had never had the chance to properly appreciate your anatomy in such a manner before, but he quickly fell in love with your form.
✦ Albedo soon began to realise the adoration behind hugs; his adoration for you also began to grow. Slowly but surely, he actively began to seek out your displays of affection, whether to feel your warmth, play with the fabric of your clothes or caress your shape, he wasn't sure.
'Thank you... deeply, for sharing this moment, you... resemble a statue, I couldn't think of anyone better suited for such an embrace.'
✦ What he was sure of was that he had appreciated the beauty of life in the same way ever before than he did when he was swaddled in your arms.
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𝖇𝖊𝖓𝖓𝖊𝖙𝖙 :
✦ The young adventurer is notoriously unlucky, his clumsiness an infamous curse that seems to follow him wherever he goes. It's precisely the reason he's very hesitant to come too close to you, for fear his awful fortune will wipe off on you. No matter how careful he seems to be, there's always something the archons never seem to be on his side.
✦ Instead of his bad luck rubbing off on you, maybe your good luck would rub off on him, at least, that's what you believed.
✦ Bennett was more than surprised when you asked for a hug, your request catching him quite off guard. He'd think on it for a moment, face painted in light pink as he reached for an invisible itch on the back of his neck.
✦ As the leader of Benny's Adventure Team, he'd find it fitting to stand alongside you, carefully tossing one of his arms over your shoulder. He'd snatch you closer with a squeeze, the marigold colour bandana he wore knotted around his upper arm tickling your chin.
✦ The hug itself would be friendly, full of total and mutual trust as you too curled an arm around his front and back. You'd both sway, beaming as laughing as he flashed you an appreciative thumbs up, the sunkiss on his skin making the clumsy boy hold the same warmth as a summer beach.
'I think you're my favourite adventure buddy, I must have been lucky for once to meet someone like you, traveller!'
✦ Bennett would hope to keep moving through Mondstadt with his arm around you. The idea was short lived, to say the least.
✦ As ever, his curse would catch him at the worst moment, a measly loose stone in the plaza floor catching his foot. Bennett tumbled, and so, you tumbled as well.
✦ The active boy would try his best to manoeuvre himself to catch you before you scraped the ground. You'd end up likely crossed over his lap, a compromising position, but it was all in good fun. You loved Bennett's antics, he brought excitement to what could have easily been a mundane life.
✦ Caught up in giggles, Bennett kept his arms crossed over you as he drew his head around to press both yours and his cheeks together. The moment was another perfect instance for a scrapbook, even some of Mondstadt's more grouchier personas sparing a chuckle for you both.
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𝖉𝖎𝖑𝖚𝖈 :
✦ For a pyro wielder, Diluc Ragnvindr doesn't present himself warmly. Seemingly tired, uninterested and slightly callous, he concerns himself with practical matters when he is alone: economist by day, vigilante by night. Stuck in his ways, he'd see no purpose in day to day public displays of affection.
✦ This doesn't mean he dislikes contact in private, however.
✦ The common misconception would leave one to believe Diluc was a stone gargoyle, incapable and unwilling to act in any other way. Alone with you, he couldn't be further from it, in fact, in most cases, he's the one to initiate the contact, sometimes without even asking.
✦ When, and only when, perfect conditions are met does Diluc lets go of his tough exterior and ultimately boils down to a lovesick puppy. However, he much prefers to be alone alongside you, of course, in these endeavours.
✦ With nobody else in sight, he would be quick to start loving, his stature still ever strong as he discarded his gloves. The dark side of dawn much preferred to hold you with his bare hands to further lift your caring skinship.
✦ Diluc would wear a sincere smile, one of patience and relief as he drew closer to you. He'd wait for you to signal him with your own charming grin, and only then would he leap into the biggest, most tender bear hug one could conjure.
✦ Strong arms suffocated you as one hand rested on the back of your head, savouring the softness of your hair. The other would cross behind you and after a few compassionate minutes, he'd concentrate his strength to lift you up, up and further into his arms.
✦ If you would like to be put down, he'd place you gentle back onto the floor, releasing you slowly. The flaming hero would notice the mess he had made of your hair, tussling it back to it's usual shape with his fingers.
✦ Otherwise, you could wrap your legs around him, and whilst supporting you, he'd spin around and hold you tightly. Head against his chest, you'd twirl stray strands of his strawberry coloured ponytail in your fingers, relishing in the lingering scent of warm booze, sweet flowers and flecks of ash.
'I apologise for the wait, I'm glad you're still here, you know how dearly I treasure your touch.'
✦ He almost seemed a natural, more so than his love driven brother when it came to private intimacy, but truthfully, he still held small amounts of insecurity. His worry would be holding you too roughly, but the more you insisted you loved his hugs, the more the people of Mondstadt would notice him acting much more chipper during his day shifts at Angel's Share.
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𝖐𝖆𝖊𝖞𝖆 :
✦ Smooth talking, smooth moving, smooth loving, there's nothing about the Favonius Cavalry Captain that doesn't radiate utmost self confidence. He acts on his own accord, conducting how he pleases. Still one for manners, he'd clear the water with you far in advance before laying on the next level of his flirtatious affairs.
✦ Kaeya Alberich is incredibly touchy, his behaviour consistent in public, private, wherever he happens to be in the same space as you. His hugs are amatory; romanced laced in the most teasing way.
✦ You could be communing with citizens of Mondstadt, researching in the library, helping sweep away stray leaves at the cathedral on behalf of a desperate attendee. Kaeya makes a habit of catching a glimpse of you as he patrols the city, making a discreet beeline to catch up to you.
✦ Regardless of if you were courting or merely on mutual acquaintanced basis, he'd know exactly which places to stir up when he hugged you from behind.
✦ The frostbearing swordsman would care little about an outside audience, and would enjoy it in true deriding manner if you grew flustered at simply the thought of being intimate in public.
✦ Kaeya would snake his arms around your waist, hands smoothing over the angles or curves. Afterwards, he'd lean into the crook of your neck to place a gentle kiss on your skin.
'I simply couldn't wait another moment, you're heavenly~'
✦ His hair, much like is brothers, would flow over your shoulder like a rich waterfall, scented with rose oil, glistening jasmine and chai.
✦ In private, Kaeya would be even more adoring, favouring a gentler approach opposed to his more teasing public affections. He'd love for you to sit between his legs on the couch, back rested against his chest.
✦ A master of fine swordmanship, he'd be oh so gentle, his touches feather soft, sometimes even so gentle you wouldn't even notice they were there. Regardless, he loves more than life to make a fuss over you when you hug, he loves to play with your hair, he loves to spin circles into your skin with careful fingertips, he loves to whisper every word you'd like to hear all with the intent of making the moment stretch for as long as it could.
✦ Kaeya knew he was free to share his love with you at any moment, but that didn't keep him from making each hug count, after all, he simply just adores the way you fit perfectly into him.
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𝖗𝖆𝖟𝖔𝖗 :
✦ Razor is a curious soul, one of primal roots. Human intimacy is worlds apart from the care he shared with his Lupical, so he craves the best of both worlds. The wolf boy wants to learn, who better to verse him in human affection than you?
✦ When you'd ask him if he would like a hug, he was unsure what it was. He'd tilt his head to the side, clueless, but eager nonetheless. If he had a tail like his canine brother and sisters, it would surely be swaying side to side by now
✦ You'd find it adorable how he'd mimic your movements like a puppet, you raised an arm and he'd do the same.
✦ As you brought yourself closer to him, he'd hesitate slightly, his feral nature urging him to step away, but his human mind knew he trusted you, so he stayed in place and allowed you to cuddle him.
✦ When wolves displayed the same behaviour, it was one of threatening origin, normally the kickstarter of an incoming fight, but with you, he felt no threat at all. Admittedly, he seemed a little stiff when you engulfed him, not quite sure what to do with his limbs, he marvelled in place for a moment.
✦ Razor felt a flurrying heat collect in his face as he gasped, gradually relaxing his shoulders as he melted away into your embrace. He also might have felt his eyes sting a little with joyful tears, it was something new, surely, but the half wolf didn't mind it.
✦ He tried to sneak a glance at how you were holding him so he could do his best to replicate it. Hesitantly, he placed his arms around you in return, though they almost seemed to lag as he moved them. Once they were securely around you, Razor felt himself click into place and squeeze tightly.
✦ Gentle wind breezed over you, catching his distinct scent of earth, fresh rain and crushed berries. He seemed a little cold from the touch, but this was expected from somebody who spent his life outside in the roaming scape of Wolvendom.
✦ His hair, though mildly knotted in some places, truly did feel plush like a wolf's pelt, ideal to pat and stroke.
'You are...warm... Razor likes it, I will... stay, for a while'
✦ Razor had discovered two things: He now loved hugs possibly more than hunting, but what he loved most was your hugs specifically.
✦ He'd be more subtle, yet increasingly obvious in the future. Whenever the overgrown puppy of a boy would crave some attention, he'd shuffle close to you, raising his arms in the same way you did when you introduced the concept to you. Moreover, he'd be seeking you out a lot-
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𝖛𝖊𝖓𝖙𝖎 :
✦ A carefree and free flowing spirit by design, Venti is true to his element when it comes to hugs. He's a very affectionate boy, but in a more innocent sense. Always full of mischievous laughter, he appreciates the silliness and fun behind the little things.
✦ The windborne bard would be very open about hugs and public affections, often asking both if he could receive and give. When accepting his proposal, you'd get to see him close his eyes in delight, cheering to himself in a childish manner.
✦ He'd be all about the performance, being a bard and all gives him this habit. Laughter, singing, general sounds of delight, whatever he can conjure, Venti would beam with happiness from even the smallest contact with you.
✦ Venti would run and spring into you through the long grass strewn across Starsnatch Cliff, gusts of anemo following his excited behaviour.
✦ What's most humouring is the rather short boy propping himself up on the tips of his toes in order to better the hug, draping both of his arms around your neck.
✦ The bard would love to look into your eyes, placing a cheeky kiss on the tip of your nose. Another common practice would be cupping your face with one hand, holding it in his palm with nothing but adoration.
✦ Another curious trick of his involves his elemental skill. Charging it, he'd hold onto you tightly, chirping as you'd both lock into each other.
'Ehe, hold on tightly, I don't want you to fall!'
✦ In one single burst, you'd be launched upwards by a powerful gust, high enough to see all of Mondstadt in the unexpectedly strong arms of your favourite Archon.
✦ Brushing stray hairs that came loose from your hairstyle during the departure, he was something freeing, a breath of fresh air as you drifted contentedly to the delicate grass below.
✦ Everything about the old young bard seemed peaceful as you'd stay warm, knitted together laying down amongst the dandelions.
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© 𝖋𝖆𝖙𝖚𝖎𝖑𝖆𝖉𝖞 .
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mellowswriting · 3 years
Note
I saw that requests are open! would it be possible for you to write a follow up to Second Chances with javi and reader? Maybe you have another kid and this time javi is able to be there for you throughout the whole pregnancy, and get to experience the first kick, you giving birth, etc (I am a sucker for domestic!javi if you can't tell haha) I think it would be really cute!!
From the Beginning
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pairing || Javier Peña x afab!Reader
summary || Javier gets to experience the chaotic excitement of welcoming a new baby to the family.
word count || 6,466 
warnings || kid fic, pregnant reader, non-graphic childbirth, some spiciness but no smut, dad!Javi being adorable 
a/n || I can’t even express how much I love writing about the boys as dads, especially Javier! I really hope you all enjoy this, it was so very much fun to write.
Main Masterlist  |   Join the taglist!
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Early spring mornings always had a special quality about them. The air was never too hot, pleasantly warm with a hint of a cool breeze that still lingered from winter’s sharp grip. Plants were beginning to bloom, the trees regaining their bright green foliage that ruffled in a symphony with every pass of the wind. Spring was the bringer of warmth after the ice and snow, the nurturer that coaxed seeds to sprout and flourish, the guide for new life and hope.
Ironic, then, that those very qualities you had grown to love were the ones causing you so much inner turmoil that you couldn’t even enjoy the gorgeous morning happening around you. You hadn’t even realized what was happening at first. Mother nature hadn’t exactly gifted you with a cycle that could be easily followed and predicted. Instead you had the supreme pleasure of having to carry around menstrual products everywhere you went and having to replace your underwear far more often than usual. So when you went two months without the waves of cramps and frustration of your period, it wasn’t all that remarkable.
It was when you were doing some last minute grocery shopping the night before that you realized something was off. Well, more off than usual. The sight of the shelves of tampons made your stomach bottom out with realization. You must’ve made quite a sight as you stood in that aisle with a cart half full of food, just staring at tampons with dread. Two boxes of pregnancy tests got tossed in with the various other items in your cart and you hoped that Javier was too tired from work to insist he help you put away the groceries.
For once, the universe appeared to be on your side. Your husband was sitting on the floor with Elianna, a spread of coloring books and crayons scattered on the living room carpet, and he actually listened to you when you waved him off to carry the bags in yourself. The tests were tucked away in the bathroom behind your tampons - ironic, yes, but it was the one place Javier really wouldn’t be poking around.
Honestly, a part of you felt bad for not telling Javier right away. He had more than proven himself as a great father and husband in the nearly two years since he returned to your life. Those irrational little fears of him leaving you and little Ellie had been crushed into nothing in the wake of the role he readily took on with his daughter, but this was different. Maybe it was pretty naive of you to not have that conversation with him, but it was something you thought you still had time for.
The plus sign on the pregnancy tests told you the time for that conversation was now, apparently. You were grateful for the timing of your little realization. Saturday mornings saw the standing trend of your sister whisking Ellie away for some ‘auntie and niece time’, and you really didn’t want her to feel the tension you were carrying. She was such a perceptive little girl that had an eye for everything.
Javier was still asleep. You usually slept in with him on the weekends, but you were restless to find out if your period was just pulling a fast one on you or if you actually were pregnant. Now you had four positive tests sitting in front of you and a sleeping husband who you couldn’t decide whether or not to wake up. Luckily, you ended up not having to make that choice since two sharp raps of his knuckles against the bathroom door snapped you out of your trance.
The door opened a millisecond after you snatched up the tests and hid them behind your back, not so unlike Ellie when she was hiding a treat she wasn’t supposed to have yet. The difference was that you didn’t know if this would be a treat to Javier. He was still half asleep, his thin pajama pants slug low on his hips and his eyes squinted against the bathroom light.
“G’morning,” He grunted as he moved to shuffle past you. “Move over, I gotta piss.”
You were rooted to the spot, though, your brain floundering to gain control of your muscles. “Uhm…”
“What’s wrong?” Javier slowly perked up through his sleepy haze at the realization that you looked downright terrified. He put his hand on your bicep and squeezed slightly. “Is Ellie okay?”
“What? No, yeah, Ellie’s fine. She’s with Amelia.” You spluttered, cringing at your inability to function.
“Then why do you look like you’ve seen a ghost?” Javi pressed. There really wasn’t any hiding things from him. Ellie must get that sharp eye of hers from her father. “What are you holding behind your back?”
You tried to swallow down the thickness that enveloped your throat to form some sort of words, literally anything to convey to him what the hell was going on, but your body was seized with fear. So you held out the tests wordlessly. His eyebrows furrowed as he took the bundle of tests from your hand, staring at them with a split second’s confusion before it dawned on him. “This…? You…?”
“Yeah.” You whispered. The worry in your voice must’ve been obvious because Javier was on you in a second flat, his arms crowding you into his chest with a crushing strength.
“You’re pregnant?” Javier croaked into your neck and the dam of emotion in your chest crumbled. His voice was full of excited disbelief, and relief crashed over you.
“Yeah, I am.” You said with a tearful chuckle, winding your arms around him to burrow yourself even further into his chest. “I know we never really talked about having another kid but… is this something you want, Javi?”
“Fuck, this is ironic.” Javier laughed quietly and when you looked up at him, he avoided your eyes with an almost bashful look. “I was gonna ask you today if you ever thought about it. Do you have any idea how many times I went over it in my head?”
You couldn’t help it - you cracked up laughing. The whole thing was almost ridiculous - the both of you worrying despite wanting the exact same thing. Tears of relief and laughter soaked into his t-shirt as you both broke into chaotic laughter, fingers clutching at each other’s shirts as you tried to catch your breath.
“So, uh… are we doing this?” Javier sounded nervous, his hands rubbing up and down your back as if to reassure himself. “You really wanna have a baby with me? Again?”
“Yeah.” Your voice was choked with a tense mix of emotions, so you cleared your throat and tried again. “Yeah, I do.”
“I can’t… fuck, I can’t believe you - you’d… thank you.” He babbled, nearly unintelligible in his scramble to convey how fucking grateful he was, but you knew. It wasn’t the first time you had heard the desperate need to spit words he couldn’t really find, the words that matched the swell of emotions in his chest that still wasn’t used to voicing. “Fuck, Ellie’s gonna be such a good big sister.”
That choked you up more than you expected. She really would be, you knew that for a fact, but it was a dream you had boxed up and shoved on a shelf with all your other unrealistic dreams for your future. Never in your life did you let yourself really think you could have the whole package deal - the loving (albeit gruff) husband, the big house, the sound of little feet chasing each other through the halls…
“Wait, how long have you been…? Or do we have to see a doctor first? Oh shit, we have to find a doctor for you, what the fuck are they called..? A fucking... obstetrician!” Javi rambled in a mix of nerves and excitement, breaking from your embrace to pace the length of the bathroom. “How are you feeling? Are you okay? Is there anything I can do to help, because -”
“Javi, breathe!” You calmed him with both hands out to stop his walking and braced your hands on his shoulders to rub at him firmly. “We have plenty of time, okay? Let me go make some coffee for you and we can sit down and make a plan. First, didn’t you have to go to the bathroom?”
“Oh… yeah.”
----------
Javier couldn’t stop bouncing his knee. It was a subconscious thing, something he stopped the moment he realized but soon found it moving of its own volition all over again. He really was trying not to let his nerves show even though he knew that you could tell. It was all so new to him, which wouldn’t be a problem if the reminder didn’t gut him every goddamn time. He couldn’t imagine how alone you must have felt the first time around when you were pregnant with Elianna, especially in these cold, sterile doctors offices.
His grip tightened on your hand. The feeling of your fingertips pressed against the top of his hand kept him grounded, helped him remind himself that there was no going back and changing everything else that happened. All he could do was be there this time around, be the best version of himself that he could be for you and his kid - well, kids now. Plural. The excitement was almost enough to drown away the guilt. Javi really could barely believe that he was getting the privilege of experiencing this with you.
“I’ve seen files on drug lords shorter than all that.” Javier nodded at the pile of forms and paperwork you held in your lap and you laughed brightly. He preened a little at the sound. It was something he could never get enough of, that laugh of yours. “I love you.”
You looked up at him, the pen in your hand stopping its constant scratching for the first time in forever, and gave him a lopsided smile. “I love you, too.”
There was no way he wasn’t going to kiss you after that adorable little display. Your cheek felt soft against his palm and the little sigh of relief you huffed against him was addictive. Just knowing that he was an anchor for you made Javier feel so incredibly loved and important and all he wanted to do was imbue you with that same sense of security. He held you close, his hand slipping back to the back of your neck to keep you right where he wanted you, and gave you those soft little kisses that never failed to make you melt.
“Mrs. Peña?” A nurse called out and he had no choice but to let you go with one last peck against your lips. He followed you and the nurse into the exam room, nerves and excitement soaring even higher in his chest.
It was kind of fascinating, watching you answer the nurse’s barrage of questions. Questions about your medical history, how many pregnancies you’ve had, all about your menstrual cycle. The two of you went back and forth for at least fifteen minutes, tossing questions and answers back and forth like a tennis match. The nurse left with the promise of the doctor being in momentarily for an ultrasound.
“Come hold my hand?” You asked, and how could he deny such a sweet request?
“Of course,” He pulled a chair from across the room and settled himself next to the exam table, both of his hands wrapping around one of yours as he brought it up to his lips to kiss your knuckles. “So what happens now?”
“The doctor will give me an ultrasound. She’ll probably want to run some blood tests, too.” You sighed, obviously uncomfortable at the thought of needles.
“I’ll hold your hand then, too.” Javier promised.
“It’ll be good practice for you, ‘cause once I’m in labor I’ll probably break your hand.” You teased and yeah, broken fingers didn’t sound all that great but fuck, he was more than ready to let you do just that. Javier wanted to be your rock, wanted to support you through it all - especially since he couldn’t the first time.
Two quick knocks sounded against the door made Javier straighten up hastily. The doctor came in with a smile and a large machine wheeling in behind her. “Good morning, mom and dad! How’re we feeling?”
“All good here, Dr. Hall. A little nauseous, but still… good.” You gave Javier’s hand a little squeeze before letting go to unbutton your jeans and fold the waistband down, followed by pulling the hem of your shirt up. It was hard to believe that the beginning of an entire new life was right there between your hips.
“Good to hear!” Dr. Hall fiddled with the ultrasound machine for a moment before turning to you. “So today we’re going to take a look and find out how far along you are, make sure mom and baby both look healthy, okay?”
“Okay,” You and Javier said in unison, and he took your hand again, needing to feel you there with him.
The gel must’ve been cold based on the way you hissed slightly. Javier watched the screen as Dr. Hall trailed the wand over your belly, lips parting at the sight of the black and white image. It was hard to make out what exactly he was seeing at first, but the image shifted slightly and he could make out the tiniest, vague shape of the newest edition to his little family.
“It looks like you’re about ten weeks along.” Dr. Hall murmured without taking her eyes off of the screen. “Baby is about the size of a plum.”
Javier squeezed your hand lightly, the both of you sparing a glance at each other before staring back at the screen in wonder. The doctor pointed out the baby’s head and a little foot as she took her measurements, reassuring you both that everything looked perfect. He gave a rushed “yes, absolutely” when she asked if he wanted the ultrasound photos - there was a spot in his wallet that he had in mind for it already.
It wasn’t as if he hadn’t been in situations that left him shocked before. This was Javier Peña, after all. Life and career experiences had given him plenty of moments where his mind was completely washed blank with surprise, but never had it been such a good thing. There were so many times that the shock was accompanied by grief or anger, but excitement? Gratefulness? That was new to him, left him reeling the entire drive home, all throughout dinner. Something in the back of his mind nagged at him that he couldn’t be like this when Ellie got home the next day. She was smarter than he could’ve imagined any kid being at three years old and even though he agreed with your assertion that no one should know about your pregnancy for a few more weeks at least, Javier was certain his daughter would be able to needle it out of him.
Those expert interrogation skills must be hereditary.
It wasn’t until he was getting ready for bed that it really hit him how real it was, that you really were sitting in the bed you shared with him, pregnant with his baby and making plans for the usual Sunday brunch and park visit you all did every week. As he set his wallet on the nightstand, he couldn’t help but pull out the little ultrasound picture. He had a feeling he would be doing that a lot, especially when the new cadets were driving him crazy at work. It all swelled up in his chest, the appreciation and excitement and disbelief, because holy shit, how did he get so lucky? One finger traced the little image in his hand, and he couldn’t help but blurt out, “Thank you.”
The confused look you gave him made him flounder for the words.
“I just… I know everything was fucked up the first time around but I swear, it’s going to be different this time. I am not going anywhere.” Javier slid closer at the sight of the tears in your eyes, easily welcoming your arms around his neck as you practically drug yourself into his lap. He held you close to his chest, trying to instill the certainty and promise of it all. “God, fuck, and I thought I couldn’t get enough of you before…”
“Javi…” You croaked, laughing wetly into his neck.
“I’m serious! You’re gonna have to tell me to fuck off when you want space because I can’t keep my hands off you.” Javi teased, relief washing over him at your seeming acceptance of his promises. “And now like this, growing my baby… fuck, I am in this with you. Me and you and Ellie… and our little plum.”
That night, Javier fell asleep with his head on your shoulder, his face buried in your neck, and his hand tucked into the waistband of your sweatpants to cradle that precious space that held his newest child.
----------
Ellie couldn’t stop touting her new title to anyone who would listen.
“I’m a big sister!” She told the cashier at the grocery store, the other kids at the park and their moms for good measure, and even the mailman when they came by each morning. The brightness in her eyes when she said it made your heart flip in your chest. You had expected some sort of confusion or even for her to be upset at the idea of a new sibling, but she launched right into a story about how her friend from playgroup has a baby sister, and you knew that she would be just fine.
With your sixteenth week rapidly approaching, you couldn’t be more grateful that Ellie was excited for the new addition to the family. It was one less thing for you to worry about amidst the chaos of bringing a new person into the world. The fatigue was something you definitely didn’t miss about pregnancy - it washed over you without warning, left you nodding off wherever you sat. Thank god Javier was such a hands on father. He had no problem herding Ellie off into the backyard or off for a walk to let you get some much needed rest.
You hadn’t expected him to be such a hands on husband, though. Sure, you knew he was excited and you knew he already loved everything about your body, but he really wasn’t lying when he said pregnancy made him want you even more. Every night, Javi’s hands gravitated to your body to ease the kinks out of your muscles, to rub your feet until the aches went away, to cheekily offer you an orgasm if you were up for one. It made you feel cherished, something you sorely missed the first time you were pregnant.
“Thank you, Javi,” You groaned lowly as those strong hands of his worked at your lower back. He easily hitched your thigh up slightly to ease some of the pressure on the new swell to your belly. There was a slur in your voice when you said, “Feels so good.”
Javier chuckled behind you, moving on to rub your feet. “Be quiet, you don’t want to wake Ellie.”
“Did you ever see this being our life?” You murmured though your voice was muffled by the pillows you buried your head in. “Telling each other not to wake the kids, making bacon smiley faces for a toddler’s breakfast?”
“I didn’t think I’d actually get it, but I wished for it. Dreamt about how pretty you’d look all full of me.” Javi placed a teasing kiss to the inside of your thigh. “The real thing is so much better.”
You could only groan under his praise. His thumbs dug into the arch of your foot and rubbed in methodical circles, drawing another pleased groan from you that you muffled in your pillow. The pain slowly melted from your tired muscles under his thorough ministrations, leaving a pleasant warmth in his wake that made you all pliant and drowsy beneath him.
“How are you feeling, sweetheart?” Javi asked as he rubbed his hands up your calves and you smiled. You knew exactly what he was gunning for.
You eased yourself onto your back and reached out for him with both arms, bringing him forward with grabby hands that he could never refuse. Javier settled between your thighs, a knowing smirk on his face, and leaned down to kiss you deeply. “‘M feeling good, Javi.”
“You know I love making my girl feel good,” Javi murmured as he kissed down your neck, one hand trailing back and forth over your hip and thigh lovingly. “Can I make you feel even better?”
“Please?” You asked breathily and your husband was more than happy to oblige. The loose tank top you wore was the first to go, followed quickly by your shorts and underwear.
Javier set about lavishing your neck and chest with affection, his touch more gentle than usual on your oversensitive breasts, and once again you were struck by the surrealness of it all. The fact that this had begun in Colombia all those years ago as two coworkers using sex for stress relief and had blossomed into this beautiful life you shared together was a thing of dreams. But there you were, with Javier Peña making love to you, quietly as to not wake your daughter and gently as to keep you and your baby safe and happy, and you could barely believe it.
“I love you,” You choked out through the tears that sprung into your eyes and Javi sat up to look at you with a concerned expression.
“What? What’s wrong?” He asked, his eyes roaming all over to find the apparent source of your tears.
“Nothing’s wrong.” You tried to pull him back down to you but he didn’t budge, the concern unwavering.
“Then why are you crying?” Javier brushed a thumb under your eyes to wipe away the evidence of your strong burst of emotion.
“Because I love you,” You chuckled as you held his hand close to your cheek and pressed a kiss to the middle of his palm. “And I’m pregnant, so everything is a thousand times more intense and you don’t get to tease me for that.”
“I would never,” Javi muttered but the mischievous grin on his face betrayed him. “Let me make you feel better, baby,”
“I’m already better, Javi - oh,”
----------
Two o’clock in the morning was not an ideal time to wake up, especially since Javier knew that Ellie would be awake and full of energy by seven, but something felt off. Even in his unconscious state, he could feel the absence of you in bed and his mind nagged at him to get up and find you. The hardwood was cold beneath his feet as he wandered from the bedroom, finding the bathroom empty before he made his way down the stairs. You often would rest on the recliner in the living room when your back was bothering you particularly bad, especially since your center of gravity had so drastically changed the further along you got in your pregnancy - but you weren’t there either.
Before Javi could start really worrying, he heard the refrigerator open and found you peering into the illuminated fridge in search of… something. A pint of ice cream was already in your hand, a spoonful of it hanging from your lips as you browsed with a frustrated look on your face, and honestly… Javi loved how you looked. It was so domestic and sweet, the sight of you in your pajamas that barely covered your belly as you raided the kitchen.
Thirty-six weeks and four days. He could barely believe how much time had passed since he saw those positive tests. It felt like forever and the blink of an eye at the same time, and he was beyond excited to meet his newest little one.
“What are you looking for, sweetheart?” Javi asked after a moment of watching you helplessly search around.
The sheepish smile you gave him made his heart swell in his chest and he automatically opened his arms as you shuffled over to bury your face in his chest. “Your kid is driving me crazy with the cravings.”
Javier hugged you tightly, relishing in the way you relaxed against him. “Well, if they’re anything like me, they probably want those barbecue chips, then.”
It didn’t take long for him to get you herded back up to bed with the chips in hand and the sight of you sleepily munching away while burrowed in the blankets eased an almost innate need Javier had to see you safe and happy, all nice and taken care of in his bed. He climbed into bed once he was sure you didn’t need anything else, settling on his side with his head propped up against his hand to watch you despite his own sleepiness.
“Let your mama sleep, troublemaker.” He murmured to your belly as he rubbed gentle circles over the spots he could feel the nudges of his little one retaliating to their father’s stern words. “Need some lotion?”
“Hmmm, please?” You hummed.
Rubbing lotion into your skin was something Javi had taken a particular liking to. The first time he had seen you doing it yourself, he was quick to take over. That was the first time he felt his little one kick at his hands and he fell even more in love - something he hadn’t thought was possible. It was a good way to feel closer to you both, to his wife and the baby you were bringing into the world, and the way you dozed slightly as he helped you relax made him feel needed, like he was doing right by you. That’s all he ever wanted to do.
A nudge to the edge of his hand made Javier glance back down to where his hands were running all over your belly, but it was the sight of the baby rolling that made him do a double take. “Holy shit,” He whispered, hands frozen as he saw what had to be the imprint of a little foot or hand poke out before disappearing. “There really is a whole person in there.”
“You’re tellin’ me,” You grumbled, grimacing slightly at the feeling. “It’s aerobics hour, apparently.”
“That’s fucking crazy.” Javi tentatively resumed massaging the lotion into your skin. It was hard to fathom, the idea that your body was so capable of creating and nurturing a brand new life, and for the millionth time he found himself thanking the universe for letting him have this second chance.
----------
Gabriel Peña came early, quick, and with a sharp cry you were sure could be heard throughout the entire hospital. His little nose was scrunched up, his face all red from his wailing, hands curled into angry fists over his sudden eviction from the warmth and darkness he was accustomed to. It was a short labor, so very different from your first with Ellie for so many reasons but the biggest being the strong presence of Javier at your side. The moment the contractions began at the crisp hour of six a.m., he was alert and full of nervous excitement.
True to his word, Javier let you clutch onto him through it all - every contraction, every push, every angered grumble you threw his way for getting you pregnant in the first place. That sharp mind of his kept up under the pressure. He spoonfed you ice chips and let you use him for support as you rocked your way through particularly bad contractions.
There were tears in Javier’s eyes as he carefully set his hand on his son’s head, carefully musing the shock of dark, wispy hair on his head. You leaned your head against Javi’s shoulder, exhaustion, relief, and happiness warring with each other after hours of labor. You felt his lips press against your temple before he sniffled and whispered, “Thank you.”
Javier stayed by Gabriel’s side the entire time the doctors checked him over and cleaned him up, per your instructions, and he was the one to return your son to your arms. It was the most careful you had ever seen him, his movements slow and deliberate, eyes on the baby’s adorable, chubby face.
“Seven pounds, nine ounces,” Javi murmured as he drug a chair as close to your bedside as possible and settled in, his hand resting on your thigh. A disgruntled whine came from the baby wriggling in your arms and you smiled, knowing he was hungry and could probably smell the milk your body had been preparing to make for his arrival. You pulled the gown down to expose your breast, propping your arm with a pillow to better support him, and adjusted his latch to settle in.
“Nice latch, mama,” One of the nurses said as she finished settling the blankets around your feet.
“Not my first time at this rodeo.” You chuckled quietly. It had been a while since Ellie weaned but you still remembered the struggle of figuring out how to get a newborn to latch properly when you had no idea what you were doing. You set your hand over Javi’s, smiling at him when he blinked sleepily up at you. Neither of you had gotten much rest before Gabriel decided to make his appearance into the world. “Can you hand me some water, honey?”
“Of course,” Javi perked up with the small task you gave him. There wasn’t much he could do at this point, but you wanted him to feel involved, to feel like he was helping you, and even though his mere presence helped you relax, you knew he was an ‘action’ kind of man. He needed something to do to feel useful. He held the straw steady for you and everything, your sweet husband. “How’re you feeling?”
“Tired.” You answered honestly, leaning into his hand when he brushed stray hairs from your face.
“I know this wasn’t easy. I’m proud of you.” It was a simple statement but it hit you right in your chest. As excited as you were to have another baby, it was hard. Exhausting. He could see it all, how tired you were and how hard you were working just to carry on like normal through your pregnancy, and while he did everything he could to ease some of that burden, the plain acknowledgement of how hard you worked felt good.
“I love you so much.” You whispered, pulling his hand close to kiss his palm.
“I love you, too.” Javier leaned over the side of the bed and kissed you softly, careful not to jostle his son where he sleepily nursed against you. “How are our kids so damn cute?”
You huffed a laugh, which made Gabriel shift against you before settling back down, sighing suspiciously similar to his father. “It helps that their dad is incredibly good looking.”
“True,” Javi said, trying for that cocky tone you loved but you didn’t miss the pink tinge to the tips of his ears. Compliments always got him like that, all red-faced and adorable - though he would never admit it.
A short nap later and you had one very excited Ellie fidgeting in the chair next to your bed, impatiently waiting to meet her baby brother. Javier stood behind her, quietly reminding her to be careful as you helped keep the squirming newborn steady in her lap. Your heart damn near exploded when she began cooing at her brother and very gently touching his soft cheeks. She was enamored by him, asking so many questions that you and her father could barely keep up.
“Can we share my bed?” “No, he can’t sleep in your bed, baby. He has to sleep in a special bed in mommy and daddy’s room.”
“Does he get a special seat like me?” “Yep! Daddy’s putting his carseat in next to yours right now. You’ll get to talk to him the whole way home.”
“Is he gonna cry a lot?” “Yeah, he will. That’s how babies let people know they need something since they don’t have words like we do.”
“Can I share my crackers with him?” “Not yet! Right now, he only drinks milk.” “Milk? Like for cereal?” “Kind of, but it comes from your mommy.” “What?!” “You ate the same thing when you were a little baby, too.” “What?!”
The entire drive home was full of little Ellie chatting away at her baby brother, mostly about the stuffed animals she had at home that she promised to show him the moment they got home. There was a small smile on Javier’s face as he drove, his hand curled around yours on the center console. He practically radiated contentment and damn did it look good on him.
----------
For what felt like the millionth time, you woke before the sun had a chance to rise. Though this time, it was to the feeling of a full bladder rather than the sound of a hungry baby, so that could be counted as a small win at the very least. You tried to ignore the ache in your healing body as you stumbled your way to and from the bathroom, near silent in your movements even though you were half asleep. It was a well practiced dance, getting out and back into bed without waking your sleeping children.
But something was off. The sheets were cooler than usual, missing the fire-like heat that Javier radiated constantly. You sat up, blinking against the drowsiness and darkness to see your husband passed out on the rocking chair in the corner of the room with Gabriel curled up on his bare chest. Skin-to-skin contact was something Javier couldn’t get enough of. He told you how close it made him feel to his son and you couldn’t complain. It was a precious sight. Avoiding the creaky floorboards, you carefully covered Gabriel with a soft baby blanket and smoothed it down his back.
“S’wrong?” Javier mumbled, words slurred with sleep, his eyes barely cracking open. On instinct, his hands shifted over the little baby asleep on him to hold him closer, even more secure.
“Shh, nothing’s wrong.” You soothed as you gently tucked his curls back away from his forehead. “Go back to sleep.”
“M’kay.” And with that his eyes were closed, back to dozing like he was never interrupted in the first place. You were glad. Tomorrow was an early morning, and paired with all of the midnight feedings and diaper changes, you all could use some rest. So you laid back down, sleep dragging you back under swiftly.
Javier was practically bouncing with nerves just hours later, even though he was trying not to show it. It brought you back to that first appointment when you were pregnant, only this time he held a sleeping one-month old who he was trying not to wake up with his nervousness.
“I just want it to go well.” He grumbled when you asked if he was okay.
“It will.” You reassured him, rubbing circles into his knee. “They’re both perfectly healthy, the pediatrician will tell you that, too.”
You were right - then again, when weren’t you? Gabe was a healthy nine and a half pounds, strong heart and lungs, and good reflexes. Javier was hooked on the pediatrician’s every word, nodding along and giving you a relieved smile with each positive statement. And of course, Ellie’s rambunctiousness had the pediatrician and nurses completely captivated as she told them all about her preschool and the antics she got up to while they checked her over.
The pride on Javier’s face with every positive comment and reassurance that both of his kids were on track developmentally made your heart flip. You felt so beyond lucky to have this little family of yours, with two beautiful children and the man you always loved. It felt too good to be true sometimes, especially when Javi pulled you close for a tight hug and a kiss to the side of your head before he worked to get one wiggly Gabe back into his onesie.
One impromptu trip to the park later and you and Javier had two very tired kids on your hands. Ellie was already passed out by the time Javier pulled into the driveway but Gabe was quickly venturing into ‘overtired’ territory. He was grumpy, wriggling around in your arms like he couldn’t get comfortable, all the while giving little whines and grunts that threatened to turn into full on wailing. He didn’t want milk, he didn’t need a diaper change, he just wanted to sleep but was too frustrated to let a nap take him.
“Give ‘em here.” Javier offered and you freely handed him over. The postpartum fatigue was no joke, and even though it was lessening with each passing day, you were damn tired so you had no issue with letting your husband put the baby down for a nap. You curled up on the couch, not quite going to sleep but still letting your mind and body rest as you listened to Javi try to negotiate with Gabriel as if he were some sicario and not just a particularly stubborn baby.
“C’mon, little man. Just go to sleep. All of your problems if you went to sleep right now? Solved. Completely solved. Instead of crying you could just… go to sleep.” Javier whispered over the cooing and grunting of his son. “Oh, don’t give me that face, mister.”
You snorted a laugh - you knew exactly what face Gabe was pulling. His nose and eyebrows would scrunch up, lips pursed as he huffed angry breaths like a little baby bull. It was an exaggerated copy of the face Javier pulled anytime he was frustrated, which you found ridiculously adorable. Slowly, the grumpy grunts became more and more quiet until they disappeared completely, and a few moments later, Javier flopped down on the couch next to you with a sigh.
“Got him down.” Javi said as he pressed close to you, burying himself between the back of the couch and your body to press his face into your neck. A blanket of drowsiness must have settled over the entire house as both kids napped peacefully in their beds and you cuddled up to your husband in the living room. The both of you would doze until the sound of little feet on the hardwood or the sounds of a hungry baby woke you, and then it would be back on the grind of parenthood, but you knew… with Javier by your side, you could do it.
{Taglist}
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clefairymuke · 3 years
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oiiii i have a request for a oneshot or maybe something fun to add to your regrets fic (whatever you find better) I think it would be funny a reader x the scouts drunk and levi finding them and being all cute taking care of reader :3
thank you for this request!! sorry for how long it took, but it managed to pull me out of some writers block that’s been kicking my ass lately. thank you for suggesting it and reading!
as always, much love! <3
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Red Wine | Levi x Reader
pairing: levi x reader
themes: fluff
tw: swearing, alcohol use
word count: 2511
True fun and relaxation is not something you typically experience.
Of course, when you signed up for this whole Scout Regiment thing, you weren’t expecting nights out in bars and plush queen-sized beds with wool blankets. You expected exactly what you got: exhausting days and mostly sleepless nights, demanding grief and waking nightmares. One thing you hadn’t expected, however, was how stale it would get. These thoughts are why you ended up where you are now: propped lazily against a wall surrounded by your friends, loud laughs bubbling freely from your ever-smiling mouth, and a bottle of wine in hand.
While the “why” is clear to you, the “how” is a bit more cloudy. Around the complete euphoria in your head stands a thick fog blocking your memory — that, or the fact that your drunkenly dwindling attention span can no longer support a thought lasting more than a second or two. All you know is that you’re here now, and you’re having the time of your life. Your eyes and ears skirt past Eren and Jean arguing without stopping to listen in as you pass the bottle to Mikasa.
For once, you aren’t thinking about how Levi could make this experience better. Although you love being in the company of your boyfriend, you can’t help but imagine his disdain if he were to witness your situation. You can almost feel the ferocity of his razor sharp-glare creeping up your spine as you picture it within your mind.
You lay your head back on the concrete wall that keeps you upright and close your eyes. Although you had shown to be quite social when the bottle first began to be passed, you now wanted nothing more than to take a nice nap — or to go vomit just to ease yourself of the queasy feeling that was overtaking your stomach. Either would suffice. You listen to your friends chatting mindlessly around you, their care to be inconspicuous slipping away with the wine. You watch Connie drain what was left in the bottle, leaving you to curse at the fact that you would be stuck in the uncomfortable kind of drunk that left you a bit nauseous while still conscious enough to be prone to anxiety.
You sit there in a dizzy oblivion for what could have been five minutes or fifty, tuning out the antics of the rest of the people in the room as they laugh and roughhouse. Your stomach stirs and turns, but your mind begins to clear: you notice Connie and Sasha choreographing a dance routine to music only they could hear; Mikasa and Armin sit quietly chatting behind Eren as he and Jean argue over who is more adept at fighting; Ymir and Christa are making googly eyes at each other over their giggles.
“Hey, guys?” you say, your brain lagging behind your mouth by at least a few seconds. “I’m probably about to throw up.” You quickly discover that you’re right, as your gut begins to bubble and your mouth begins to water.
“Oh, fuck,” Connie mumbles as he looks around the room desperately. Sasha looks disappointed as he stops dancing and approaches where you sit against the wall, gripping your wrists in his hands and helping you to your feet; with both of you being drunk enough to show it, stumbles are surely present. Time skips, and you’re kneeled in front of the toilet, Connie leaving to give you privacy — you’re decidedly much drunker than you thought you were.
Just as you start to vomit, you hear Eren defeatedly say, “Oh, fuck me.” That can’t be good.
The space goes silent save your groans. The most imaginative depths of your brain think that perhaps a titan is looking in the window, waiting to bring you all to your doom. How convenient for half of the newest scout recruits to be intoxicated and defenseless. When you hear Levi’s voice say, “Stupid fucking brats. Where is she?” you wish it were a titan instead.
A chorus of voices answer, “Bathroom.” What a bunch of fucking sellouts, you think to yourself. Your heartbeat begins to pound in your throat again as you hear his footsteps grow near; when he taps at the door a few times, you let it all out — out of fear or simple drunkenness you are unsure. “God damn it,” you hear him mumble before the door handle turns and his hands find your hair, pulling it back into a makeshift ponytail.
He rubs your back in a manner you can only describe as passive-aggressive. You can tell he wants to scold you — and you’re definitely in for it once you get to feeling better — but you can also tell that he wants to care for you. That’s why you try to pretend not to hear his curses as he lectures you on responsibility.
“Why the hell are you drinking with these idiots? I wouldn’t be mad if it was a glass or two, but there are three empty bottles on the floor in there. Three. No wonder you’re puking your fucking guts up,” he mutters, voice low enough for only you to hear despite his angry tone.
You feel your eyes watering as your stomach settles for another brief moment. “Levi,” you say, your breathing labored, “now is not the time.” You hear him scoff before you begin to dry heave, his hand moving a bit more caring across your back as he holds onto your hair. Your gut starts to feel a bit better as your brain realizes there’s nothing left. He places his hands under your arms and lifts you gently to your feet before flushing the toilet. You stumble awkwardly to his lead as he escorts you to the sink.
He reaches around you to turn on the water, which is cold to the touch as he holds your hand beneath it. “Clean your mouth out,” he says, nudging his hand around yours until you form a cup. “It’s disgusting.” You oblige him, lifting it to your lips. You feel it drip down your chin as you swish it around between your teeth, looking up in the mirror to see your blushing cheeks and droopy eyes. Levi stands behind you, dressed in no more than a grey t-shirt and some comfortable-looking pants. His hair is neat and combed, which doesn’t quite match the rest of his attire, but you aren’t complaining. He looks as ethereal as always. After you spit, he grabs your shoulder and spins you around to face him.
“You okay?” he asks, brushing the tears that had formed on your face away with his thumbs. You shake your head at him, your eyes trailing down to the ground. Here comes the scolding.
He sweeps you off your feet, to your surprise, holding you bridal-style as he carries you out of the bathroom. You lay your head against his shoulder, seeing the walls of the room and the faces of your friends go blurrily by as he strides to the door; they all look terrified.
“Laps,” you hear Levi announce to your friends, his voice icy. “At dawn. I don’t give a shit if you’re hungover.”
A chorus of groans is the soundtrack for your exit as the door slams shut. The walk back to Levi’s suite is spotty at best; you’re unsure of exactly how long it’s taking. The scenery around you feels more dreamlike than anything — you find yourself hoping that you’re still propped against the wall with your friends, sleeping soundly and dreaming of Levi catching you red-handed. When time jumps and he’s laying you down on his couch, you’re pretty sure you’re awake.
You hear rustling around as you lay there, still half waiting for a scolding. He rejoins you rather quickly, setting some things down on the side table and gently lifting your head. He sits, letting you back down slowly to lay in his lap. “I brought you bread,” he says, taking it from the table and placing it in your hands. “It’ll soak up the alcohol. There’s water over here when you need it.” You inspect the bread lazily before nibbling on it. The very idea of chewing something and swallowing it is enough to make you nauseous, but you trust his judgement.
You feel his hand fall atop your forehead and his fingers draw circles in your hair. You don’t fight the grin threatening your lips. “Are you okay, my love?” he asks, his voice soft. This is the tenderness you had fallen in love with many months ago; the one thing your friends are blind to. He carries himself with such coldness for the public — he is rude, and blunt, and insufferable, and unobtainable. With you, however, he could be kind. He could be loving. The speed with which his gentle voice melts your heart never lessens. This is Levi at his most vulnerable.
“I’m just drunk,” you tell him, your words slurring into each other. “I’m not dying.”
You hear a chuckle barely pass over his lips like a spring breeze, the sparkle in his eyes reminiscent of the way the sun reflects off the surface of a pond. The peaceful nature of your position is a worthy opponent to how your insides wage war on one another: nausea, dizziness, and the beginnings of what will become an absolutely splitting headache all contained within one disoriented body. “I would’ve gone with you, you know,” he says suddenly after a serene moment of silence. “I would’ve known when you needed to stop drinking.” He combs his fingers against your cheek, silvery eyes softening into pools of undeniable adoration.
“You would’ve been a complete buzzkill,” you reply, half joking as you close your eyes and enjoy the rare affection.
You hear a cross between a scoff and a laugh come from above you. “Keeping those brats from getting you so wasted that you start puking isn’t being a buzzkill. It’s called taking care of you.”
“I think I’m not drunk enough,” you say honestly. “We ran out of wine right at that stage where you could go to sleep or start throwing up, but there’s absolutely no chance of having a good time.”
He taps the top of your head with two fingers, prompting you to let him up. You oblige him, using the opportunity to lay down your bread and take a sip from the glass of water that rests on the side table. You watch as he saunters back toward the kitchen, wondering what he was doing somewhat, but mostly just trying to get a grip on your senses. You sit up as you wait on his return, laying your head back against the plush upholstery and taking deep breaths.
He’s back as quickly as he left, both hands behind his back in a feeble attempt to hide the wine glasses as their stems poked around to your view. You feel a smile creep onto your face as he unveils his master plan: a bottle of red wine and a glass for each of you. “Don’t expect this often,” he announces as he sets it all on the table, pulling a wine key from his pocket. He joins you on the couch, scooting in close so that your knees brush before you hear the satisfying pop of the cork and the relaxing swish of liquid on glass.
“You’re expecting me to believe that Captain Levi is offering to get drunk with me?” you giggle, almost nervous to reach for the wine in front of you. He laughs off your comment, reaching in front of him and lifting the glass to his lips; he takes only a sip before looking at you in expectation. You take yours as well, holding it up to his jokingly before you both bring them to your mouths.
After your first gulp, time begins to melt away. A movie-esque montage begins in front of your eyes: the sight of the man you love, once so stoic and so stiff, loosening and laughing the night away at your side; the feeling of typically isolated and scarce hands trailing carelessly along the length of your arms, warm against the sensitive skin of your wrists and your thighs; the smell of red wine spilled innocently on hardwood and upholstery without complaints or uprooting to clean it; the sound of his velvet and brass voice with his uncensored expressions of love, whispered and melodic; the taste of mint and jasmine tea on his unusually wandering lips.
What might be thirty minutes or three hours passes in a flash, leaving you sprawled across the couch with the drunken mess that is your typically reserved lover, legs utterly entangled so that you were unsure where you ended and he began. He’s whispering to you — that much you know — but his words are slurred, and you’re unbelievably distracted by the feeling of wet kisses being peppered along your jaw and ear. He grasps at your back, massaging and caressing and leaving no inch uncovered by his calloused hands as his touch reminds you why you breathe and laugh and plainly exist.
“Levi,” you whisper, your mind a tangled ball of twine save for the feeling of his breath on your cheek.
He hums in response, not bothering to look up at you. You can feel his grin against your jaw.
“We should get to bed, love.”
You’d be left to wonder how the two of you made it into the next room when morning came; rest assured there would be a trail from the couch to the bedroom door made from clumsily knocked-over knick knacks and your discarded clothes from the day to clue you in. If you were sober, you’d care enough about Levi’s wrath tomorrow to clean up behind the two of you; however, you aren’t sober, and you don’t care enough.
The two of you fall into the bed you share, intertwining your limbs like the threads of a tapestry, laying out plainly and beautifully the comfort you find in him. Your head finds his chest and his hands find your lower back, pulling you flush against him as his eyelids begin their threats to close before he is quite ready. He murmurs out your name, his hold on you growing more snug when it passes his lips. “I love you, s—” he falters, nuzzling his face in the top of your head. “So much.”
It’s short — and a pretty common thing for someone to say to the person they love — but it means everything coming from him. “I love you, Levi,” you tell him, praying to whatever is up there that you’ll remember this in the morning.
Soon, the two of you stop stirring and whispering. As you breathe him in, you try to hear his words in your mind as many times as you can before you slip out of consciousness. You begin to drift off to sleep, peaceful and content in his arms as you’ve ever been.
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Note
hey!!! if you're down to do a fic rec list, i would LOVE some codywan post-order-66 fics!!! fluff and smut would be greatly appreciated as well if you cant find any for the first prompt <33
ANON, I'M ALWAYS DOWN TO DO A FIC REC LIST!!!!
Oooooo post-order-66 codywan fics???? I've got a few of those for you!!!
Anon, if you keep an eyes out, I’ll be making a codywan fluff and smut fic rec list just for you
Life Didn't End When The World Did by @alyyks It had not happened like this.
As a matter of fact, this—whatever this was—had never happened at all.
Obi-Wan leaned over the man spread over his lap, afraid to jostle him and hurt him further, and felt a braid over twenty years gone slide over his shoulder. The man in his lap was older than Obi-Wan had last seen him, grey streaking his dark hair where the red of blood was not hiding it.
--- The Force works in mysterious ways. Sometimes its visions are rescue signals. Sometimes good things happen.
Tabula Rasa (series) by @dogmatix The battle on Utapau ends, then things go sideways. Cody is determined to try and put things right, even if he has to travel to the ends of the galaxy to catch up to Obi-Wan.
And I Fear Nothing (wip) by @maiseey Rex and Ahsoka delivered Cody to Obi-Wan with a bloody dressing taped to his scalp and a ruined left leg. The last thing he’d expected was his General to pick his traitorous shebs up with two pink, squalling natborns strapped to his back, but he's here to stay.
The Carbon Cycle by @cafffine In an attempt to settle into his life on Tatooine, Obi-wan picks up flower gardening. Across the galaxy, Cody is stuck with an inhibitor chip in his head and a thankless job in the Empire. - When strange gardening advice and the budding rebellion somehow bridge the infinite distance between them, the question must be asked: How much do a hermit and a stormtrooper really mean to each other?
You're Somebody Else (wip) by @ewanmcgregorismyhomeboy12 It would mean no more of this place that was slowly sapping the life from him. No more mornings with familiar fingers crushing his windpipe or smashing his ribs. No more hiding bruises from the guards or biting back sounds of pain that hurt twice as much because of who was inflicting it to keep from attracting attention.
it's not fair how much i love you by @ankahikoibaat There are good days and there are bad days. But all days are faced together.
Prompt: the way you said 'I love you' - muffled, from the other side of the door.
Sudden Silence, Sudden Heat by @ewanmcgregorismyhomeboy12 Since Cody had arrived, battered and broken and desperate for forgiveness, it had felt as though they were tiptoeing around each other, inching towards something not quite defined.
i have not yet learned to hold you by QuickSilverFox3 Cody and Obi-Wan flee from the newly formed Empire and the shadows that wear Cody’s face. They travel as refugees, war-torn and clinging to each other.
Cuisine's Kindest Course by @ewanmcgregorismyhomeboy12 (ITH ART BY @shukruut “Anyone who tells a lie has not pure heart, and cannot make good soup.” ― Ludwig van Beethoven
darkest before the dawn by @oathkeeperoxas “Why are you here, Cody? What do you want?” Kenobi asks wearily, as if that’s not the most loaded question currently in Cody’s life.
He doesn’t know if he’s here because he knows, deep in his gut, that the emotions he felt when following his General onto a battlefield were strong enough to cross lifetimes. But maybe it doesn’t matter what that dead version of Cody wanted; maybe he just needs to find out what he feels now, instead of trying to do everything in his power to avoid it.
Or,
Cody experiences the entire range of human emotion out among Tatooine’s sandy desert dunes.
I'm right here by me lol “Hear that?” Obi-Wan asked, his hand coming through Cody’s sweaty hair. “I’m alive. I’m right here.
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OR Cody has a nightmare post-Order 66, Obi-Wan comforts him
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alice-angel12x · 3 years
Text
☁Centaur!Shouto x reader
It was a bright hot summer day, not even a cloud in the sky. It would be a perfect day for a good centaur racing, I would say.
"And what a beautiful day here in our small town of Seris. The perfect weather for a good Race, right Aizawa?" Present Mic's voice boomed over the arena.
"Augh. I would be at home asleep right now," Mr.Aizawa complained.
"Anyway it's the last lap for the race and number 27 Endeavor with rider Hawks is still holding first place, with number 1 All Might with rider Night eye on their tail. Which is exciting cause both centaurs have won both Preakness Stakes, and Belmont Stakes. If either one wins they will be the next triple crown," mic explained.
He was right the race was heated. All Might started to catch up with endeavor, but Endeavor was still in the lead by a nose.
"We're not going to win this," Night eye sighed as he eyed up Hawks and his centaur.
"Don't give up nighteye, we can still win this. The hurdles are the last obstacle," All Might gasps as he continues to run full throttle.
Up ahead were a few rows of fences laid out 176 yards away from the finish line.
As the two centaurs leaped over the fecenes, Endeavor failed to time his leap and knocked over the fence. Causing him to trip and send his rider flying. All Might and Night eye made it past the fences and sped ahead to take the win. As endeavor watched on as he felt the glare of his owner in the stand.
Farther away was a small pen that held the little colts, that also watched the race.
"Man did you see that, All Might Won. Know he's the triple Crown," A young colt Izuku said in awe.
"Ha, when I become a strong stallion, I'll be the next triple crown," Katsuki said confidently.
Shouto a young colt was in awe of All night's strength and aura. He wanted to be strong like him.
___________
When Shoto and Endeavor returned home, their life changed drastically. Their owner Figs started to do the bare minimum to take care of them. It got so bad that endeavors mate Rei died of malnutrition. After that loss in the race, Fig took out his anger on the centaurs.
Endeavor wasn't any better. Every day he forced his colts and fillies to run and train. His oldest son died of exhaustion from Endeavor, and lack of nutrition from Fig.
The other two siblings were eventually sold to other owners. Leaving Shouto alone in that old barn. ____
"Faster Shouto, you never be a triple Crown with that speed," Endeavor said as he whipped Shouto.
Shouto kept running till he came to an abrupt stop, as he threw up near an old tree. Endeavor cracked his whip as a warning to Shoto.
Shouto gasped as he got back but and ran till dawn.
"Humph, you have lots of room for improvement. Get to your stall and rest. We're continuing this tomorrow," Endeavor said not even looking at Shouto.
Shouto said made his way to his stable as he waited in his stall. Eventually, Fig came and dropped two nearly rotten apples in his food pale. Shouto grimaced and Fig noticed. Which did not make him happy.
"What not good Enough for you. You little s***!" Fig shouted as he grabbed a hot kettle and threw a cup's worth of boiling water at his face.
Shouto screamed in pain as he clutched the left side of his face.
"NOW YOUR PLACE. I OWN YOU!" Fig yelled in anger as he stormed out of the barn.
Shoto looked over to his father's stall, which was across from him. Only to see that his father just stared at him with no emotion. He simply shook his head and turned away.
It felt like the who world shatters as he felt nothing anger towards his father, Fig, Everything. From that day he refused to train or cooperate. Which lead to Him being beaten, whipped, and starve.
"How long are you going to stay on your foolish strike? I won't benefit you in the long run," Endeavor said as he went to sleep.
But Shoto didn't reply as quickly dug up the spare key to his stall. Quietly he unlocked his stall, then the barn door. Once outside he locked the door and made a run for the forest.
The forest was dark and quiet. It felt like Shoto was walking for miles, but didn't feel safe to rest anywhere in the forest. As he continued onward, Shoto tried and fell down a steep hill and hurt his right front leg. He cried out in pain as the pain was almost bearable. He limps forward and Eventually gets out of the forest to see... A barn out in the distance.
At first, Shoto was confused, did he walk in one big circle. Sadly he was too tired and sore to keep walking. As he collapsed where he stood.
The sun peeked above the horizon as the rooster crowed into the morning sky. Sunlight poured into the barn where Shouto laid. His eyes slowly open as he pushed himself upright.
It took him a few seconds to realize he was in a barn. He quickly got to his feet only to feel a sharp pain him his front leg. Cried in pain as he bumped into the side of his stall. It caused A huge ruckus as the stall across from his stirred. He closed his eyes tight expecting his father to scold him, only to hear a different voice.
"Hey keep it down over there. So of use are still trying to sleep," a young voice called out.
Shouto looked over to see a young centaur colt. Around his age with odd purple hair and baggy eyes.
Suddenly another voice calls out.
"What's going on over there?" A female voice asked this time.
Another centaur filly, as his age was in the stall next to the purple guy. She had fair skin and jet black hair tied into a ponytail.
"W-were am I?" Shouto asked.
"You are in a barn on the Aizawa family's land," The girl explained. "I'm Momo by the way. And this guy is Shinsou," she introduced.
"Shoto," Shoto said simply.
Shouto quickly inspects himself and sees he is covered in bandages. His coat and hair were all muddy and messy.
Suddenly the barn door opened revealing a young girl with h/c hair and e/c eyes. She looked a year or two younger than Shouto.
She came into the barn and started to drop apples, carrots, and some oats into their food pale. Shouto backs up to the corner of the stall, suspicious of the new human. The girl eventually comes over to his stall with a smile as she places his breakfast in the food pile. Shouto glared at her the entire time. Though she didn't seem to be bothered by that, as she continued her chores.
"Momo, who is that?" Shouto asked.
"That is y/n, she is one of the caretakers here, she is also my partner in pageants," Momo said proudly.
"Bad experiences with humans, Shouto?" Shinsou asked.
"You could say that,'' Shouto said.
Eventually, y/n came back with some bandages and cleaning supplies, and entering Shouto's stall. He tensed up as he saw her approach him. She slowly got on her knees and got slightly closer to him.
"Hello, there I'm y/n. I just want to change your bandages," She said softly. "And what's your name?" She asked.
Shouto didn't say anything as he tried to back away from her even more. Y/n slowly started to get closer only for Shoto to snap at her. She remained calm as she held out her hand, as it started to glow a light blue.
Suddenly all of Shouto's fears and anger began to slip away. So did his energy as he slowly laid on his side. Then y/n got to work on his bandages. Once she was finished she started to stroke Shoto's hair. Shouto didn't mind this as he leaned into it.
"There, that wasn't so bad, was it. Though you really need a bath,"  Y/n giggled slightly.
The bath was a whole new experience for Shoto. He could feel her massaging his muscles, and scrubbing deep into his dirty coat. He had never felt so relaxed in his life before. But after it, he never felt too fresh and clean before. As Y/n began to rub a dry towel on his head, and then down his body. Without even knowing he was slowly leaning onto y/n.
"Shouto... My name is Shouto," He finally answered.
"That's a lovely name," Y/n said as she continued to brush his hair and coat.
Y/n cleaned him up and left him to rest for the day. As Shouto laid down in pure bliss for the first time. He felt fresh and clean, with a full stomach for once.
"Maybe living with them a little longer wouldn't hurt," Shouto mumbled to himself.
------------------ x
Part.2 coming soon. I hope you liked it and have some requests for me. Soo sees you next time.
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makoodlesarchive · 4 years
Text
when i was young i fell into a river
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pairing: kirishima x reader
word count: 5k
warnings: none, really! a bit of angst, a bit of fluff i guess?
notes: hello, it's me, back again with some writing! it's been a long time and i'm very sorry about that, but i've finally gotten around to writing and posting my spirited away au! i'm v stressed with college so this turned out more vent-y than i had originally intended, but hopefully it's enjoyable anyway! thank you all for being so patient with me, i am endlessly grateful for you
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The dream is the same as always, comforting in its familiarity.
A salt-scented breeze cools your sweat-soaked brow as you pause behind one of the sliding screen doors, the rice paper windows doing nothing to block out the chatter of the other workers. The bubbling noise of the bathhouse is constant, and the quiet little moments you steal away for yourself in the middle of the working day is the only solitude you’ve gotten since you came here. The work is physically back-breaking, but you know that you’re working towards a goal. It’s just a shame that you can’t remember exactly what that goal is.
One of the other girls calls your name, and you sigh as your unofficial break comes to an end. You slip back into the room, ignoring the way the frog spirits snicker and hold their noses as you pass. They like to complain a lot about your human stench, but it doesn’t stop them from threatening to eat you every time you make a mistake. Fear, you’ve found, is an uncomfortably successful motivator.
The days bleed into one another, full of scrubbing dark wooden floors and the rich earthy scents of the herbal mixes they use in the baths. The spirits that frequent the bathhouse, that once inspired so much awe and fear in your heart, become so commonplace that you hardly spare them a glance anymore. From the cackling masked spirits that always travel in threes to the grinning cat spirits to the sombre, unspeaking river spirits, you only go as far as to offer them a polite bow before scurrying out of their way. They never spare you any attention, anyway -- most of the time, the spirits’ eyes seem to look right through you.
All but one, that is.
He looks to be a boy around your age, but appearances can be deceiving around here. His red eyes are often dull and blank, but even so they have a certain ageless quality about them that no human twelve-year-old could ever possess. His scarlet hair sticks up in gravity-defying spikes, and his skin is as smooth and clear as running water. His face is often stuck in a carefully cultivated blank expression; the only thing about him that doesn’t seem intimidatingly otherworldly are the deep purple shadows under his eyes.
He helped you once, when you first came here. The rare act of kindness had stuck in your head, made even more remarkable in the face of the following weeks and months of harsh work and cruel co-workers. You wonder if he remembers; he doesn’t often look at you, but sometimes when he does you swear you can see a flicker of something in his eyes.
Two of the girls start yelling at each other, arguing heatedly over the way the work is being divided. A foreman appears to break up the fight, but then they both start shouting at him instead. You take the moment of distraction to relax, wincing at the pull of your tired muscles in the back of your neck. All the other girls working at the bath house are older and bigger than you, which means you need to work twice as hard to keep up with them and prove that you’re worth keeping around.
In the brief moment of rest, your eyes are drawn slowly to the corridor, where guests and workers alike bustle past as they travel to the treatment rooms and bathtubs deeper into the bathhouse. As if you’ve conjured him just by thinking about him, the boy stands in the doorway.
You straighten up on instinct, suddenly self-conscious of your sweat-soaked body and dishevelled uniform. He’s not even looking your way, preoccupied with the two girls who are still yelling at the frog foreman. Slowly though, his eyes began to travel the room, and you take a deep breath and hold it as his dull ruby gaze lands on you like a physical weight. You crack a nervous smile, feeling the muscles in your cheeks that have gone unused for weeks ache at the strain, and raise a hand to give him a tiny wave.
For just a moment, that blankness in his face seems to quiver and fall away. He smiles back.
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You jolt awake, breathing heavily and coated in a light sheen of sweat. You’ve had the same dream, or some variation of it, regularly ever since you were twelve years old and while it’s become familiar to you, you still find yourself feeling vaguely panicked when you wake up after it, as though you’ve forgotten something very important.
Once your heartbeat has calmed down a little, you pull yourself out of bed and trudge into the kitchen to make yourself some tea. The weak, milky light of dawn filters in through the windows, lighting your apartment up just enough so that you don’t have to turn on a light to make your way around. You take your tea out to the balcony and sit, gazing out at the purplish early morning sky.
Most of the time when you wake up from those dreams you feel blessedly lucky to be living alone with no one to question or bother you, but sometimes you can’t help but be overcome by overwhelming loneliness. The dreams are silly and most of the time they don’t even make any sense, but in the aftermath of them you’re always left with a vague sense of unfulfillment, though you can’t put your finger exactly on what it is you’re missing. You always end up exactly like this; sitting outside on your balcony in the early morning light, drinking tea alone and desperately wishing for something more.
You sigh, and go back inside.
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The dream is the same, but different.
The garden is in full bloom, greenery overlaid with bursts of beautiful bright colours. Camellias, rhododendrons, and oleanders wave and shiver gently in the warm breeze, and apple blossoms hang heavily from a nearby tree. The flowering garden is enormous and maze-like, and you have yet to see it in any state other than fully flourishing.
It’s a beautiful place, especially after the hot, cramped working quarters of the bathhouse. You inhale the sweetly fragranced air and feel the knot of tension in your spine unfurl; it feels like the first time that you’ve been able to breathe all week, but that’s not the only reason that you’ve found yourself outside.
At the bottom of the garden, the grass drops off into a sheer drop. The cliff face overlooks a seemingly endless ocean, and you perch a safe distance from the drop before leaning back in the grass. The sky is an almost surreally deep blue and you watch as enormous fluffy clouds float by, looking as though they’ve been painted on a jewel-blue canvas.
It’s not the first time you’ve had this dream, and you know what you’ll see if you keep patiently watching.
It doesn’t take long — it never does. You time your lunch breaks precisely, all so you get to see this sight.
The clear blue sky makes it so much easier to spot the shiny white scales, flashing jewel-bright in the sunlight. The dragon writhes in the sky, streaking through the air like a great serpent caught in the wind. Even from this distance, you can see the knife-like teeth, the great sharp claws that gleam like pyrite, and the twisting horns that erupt from his head like daggers made from calcified bone. He looks deadly, a living weapon that swims through the air like a salmon in open water, but the sight of him makes something settle in your stomach.
You wonder what it would feel like to fall through the air with nothing but the wind to break your fall. You imagine it must feel like freedom.
The dragon flutters through the air, buoyed by the gentle sea breeze. If you didn’t know better, you might almost think that he was showing off — his movements are hypnotic, dreamlike, more like a dance than anything. His scales glow pearlescent in the midday sun, otherworldly and earthly all at once.
You could happily stay and watch him skim through the sky forever, but already the bell is being rung to call all workers back into the bathhouse. You heave a sigh so deep it feels as though your chest is about to crack with the force of it, before hauling yourself to your feet.
Your break is over, and now it’s back to work.
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Sometimes you find it difficult to tell when you’re dreaming and when you’re awake. It feels as though everything is always happening all at once, in the present tense, forever. You don’t get to rest when you close your eyes and drift off to sleep, because the dreams just keep coming and coming. Sometimes you don’t feel like your life is real when you’re awake.
Riding on the train has always been therapeutic, especially at this time of the early morning. The sun rising lazily over the horizon sends milky threads of purple and pink across the cloudy sky, and you cradle your chin in your hand as you gaze out across the moving landscape. You love these little trips, feeling more at home in the creaky, overfull train carriage than you do in your own bedroom sometimes, though you can’t quite work out where that particular feeling comes from.
You know sometimes that stories end with “And then I woke up — it was only a dream”, but in your experience the story simply doesn’t end. You cannot fully wake up without the tail-ends of your dreams clinging to you for the rest of the day, and you never fully sleep. You just dream, dream, dream.
Sighing, you lean your head back against the seat that you’re slumped in. The train carriage is too full, and you were lucky to get a seat in the first place — from your vantage point, you watch as people sway in tandem with the motion of the train. It’s almost hypnotic, how they undulate back and forth with every turn, brushing against each other only to be pulled apart again by the lurching train.
Through the sea of bodies, you catch a man’s eye. It breaks the monotony of the morning commute and your own spiralling thoughts, and your spine straightens unconsciously. He quirks an eyebrow briefly, slightly, in such a way that no one would be able to safely accuse him of having done it.
You look away, startled for no good reason. Do you know him? He feels familiar in a way that you can’t quite put your finger on. The train rattles on, and it takes several long minutes before you work up the nerve to glance the man’s way again. He’s still watching you, but you’re ready for it this time. His attention isn’t such a shock, and you allow your eyes to wander over his face properly.
You must know him, you think. Your eyes track over his features as though they’re winding over a well-worn path, admiring the curve of his nose and the fullness of his lips and the arch of his eyebrows over his intense, watchful eyes.
He smiles at you, and it feels as though you’re sharing a secret from across the crowded train carriage. You smile back — it’s just a small tug of the corners of your mouth, but it’s the most you’ve smiled in months. Longer, maybe.
In the middle of the carriage a woman laughs at something her friend has said and sways backward, blocking your view of the stranger. It feels like a loss.
The train trundles onwards, and the carriage gradually empties out. You watch people step off the train with friends, with their heads ducked low, lost in thought, arguing over the phone, distracted with their book bags. By the time it comes to your stop, the man is gone.
You try not to feel disappointed as you step off the train — it’s silly, after all. You don’t know the man, and whatever you thought you felt as you looked at each other was surely all in your own head. Your head has been awfully full, recently.
As you step off the train you grapple with your bag, side-stepping a businessman who is busy shouting down the phone at some unfortunate coworker. You’re distracted, which is the only reasonable explanation for how long it takes you to realise that the man from the train is standing in front of you.
“Oh.” You blurt, startled. You had already begun to resign yourself to never seeing him again, so you can’t help but feel distinctly caught off guard at the sight of him standing before you. “Hi.”
“Hello.” The man says. He’s looking at you expectantly, but you have no idea what he’s waiting for — as it is, you get completely distracted by his eyes. You hadn’t noticed on the train, but now that he’s up close you see that they’re a truly unusual deep burgundy. He tilts his head when you remain silent, and bites his lip. Now that you’re really looking, you notice how sharp his teeth are. “You’ve barely changed at all.”
You blink at him. “Er…” You trail off nervously. You don’t recognise him, but you feel like you know him. Clearly, he thinks that he knows you.
“It’s fitting, isn’t it? Meeting again on a train?” He smiles, and it’s an impossibly knowing expression. You don’t think you’ve ever been on the receiving end of a look that intimate in your life, though you have no idea what he’s talking about.
Someone collides hard with your shoulder and you stagger for balance. You only look away from the man for a mere second, but it’s enough; when you look again, he’s gone.
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You take to walking. There’s a wooded area behind the town, and you enjoy traipsing idly through the trees. Ancient roots erupt out of the dirt and fan over the ground like hairs, and the moss that covers the trunks of the trees is such a deep green that it almost seems like paint pigment. It’s soothing, being surrounded by nature like this. It reminds you of childhood — the simplicity of being able to jump over tree roots under a canopy of pale green leaves, of being able to leave all your thoughts and stress at the boundary of the forest.
It’s where you come after waking sweat-soaked and disoriented from a dream that clings to you like a burr, where you walk among the ferns and the needle-leaved weeds until you manage to shake the last vestiges of memory from your mind. You need it, especially in the mornings where you wake up with the acrid scent of herbal cleanser stinging in your nose or the bite of hard calluses on your palms from non-existent rough cloths. On mornings like that, you walk and walk until you no longer feel as though you’re more alive in your dreams than you are in reality.
Deep in the forest is a great red facade, painted a flaking, faded red. You wander by it frequently, admiring the overgrown greenery that crawls up the walls like reaching fingers, the mossy stone guardian that stands sentinel amongst the cracked flagstones that lead into the tunnelled entrance. You’ve asked around in the town, curious about what exactly this building was for, but most of the locals either don’t know what building you’re talking about or admit that they’re not sure. One man told you that the facade was built for a theme park in the 90s that had ended up going bust in the recession, and that the building only looked old.
You remain unconvinced on that front. The building has the kind of presence that only very old things have; it feels like it’s watching you.
For the most part, your walks in the forest are peaceful. Recently though, you’ve found yourself plagued by an insistent, irritating sense of deja vu. You don’t know where it’s coming from, and it hits you at the strangest of times — when you’re making tea, or in the bath, or cleaning your apartment, or on the train, or admiring the sky on a cloudless day.
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The man from the train is the boy in your dreams. It takes you weeks to come to that realisation. You just wake up in the middle of the night on a random Tuesday, with wide eyes and clammy skin and his name slipping from the forefront of your mind.
It shouldn’t be possible, but once it dawns on you, you’re certain of it.
Even stranger is that once you realise it, it feels as though you see him everywhere. You see flashes of red hair when you’re walking down the street, when you’re grocery shopping, when you’re walking home late at night. It’s only ever the barest glance out of the corner of your eye, just overt enough for you to know it’s him, but subtle enough for you to question yourself immediately after.
One night, you travel to a local city to meet some old school friends. At night, the city seems to pulse. The music from seedy clubs spills out into the neon-lit streets, muffled shouted arguments echoes from alleyways and apartments alike, and the streets are peppered with people either scurrying or stumbling home, with very little variation. Though the perpetually overcast sky hides any trace of the moon or stars, the streetlamps reflect in the ever-present stagnant puddles littering the street, lighting them up in varying shades of sickly yellow.
At night, the city seems alive. Chronically ill and struggling to breathe, maybe, but clinging to life all the same.
The way the neon lights flicker in the gloomy darkness, just barely illuminating the shadows of people hurrying through the streets to get in out of the rain, reminds you of something you can’t quite remember. It sits in the back of your mind like a sour taste, but no matter how much you reach for the memory it remains just out of reach.
You spend most of the night staring out of the steamed up window of the pub, entranced by the sight of the night streets and frustrated by the memories that seem to dangle just out of reach. You know that it doesn’t make for good company, and you feel guilty for that. Your friends don’t seem overly surprised at your detachment. You’ve been drifting away for years, and though tonight was supposed to be all about reconnecting it seems clear that it’s not going to work.
When you eventually stand up to leave, with forced smiles and awkward goodbyes, you can’t help but feel melancholy settle over you like a second skin. As you slip out of the pub and onto the dark streets, the thought crosses your mind that you’re not used to being alone like this. It’s a silly thought, really; you’ve been alone for years. But sometimes, in those liminal moments between waking and sleeping, you swear you can hear the gentle drowsy breaths of dozens of people sleeping all around you, as though you’re surrounded on all sides. On those nights you wake up hot and claustrophobic and uncomfortable, but never feeling lonely.
It is probably your own fault, you reflect as you drift down the sidewalk like a ghost. It’s difficult to make an effort to know people when you feel as though you don’t know yourself. You don’t know how to bridge the distance between yourself and other people. You think sometimes that you’re missing chunks of yourself.
You pass an open shopfront that’s serving street food, and glance briefly in at the kitchen. The cook is illuminated only dimly in the smoky room, standing out as a shadow figure more than anything, and for a split second you could swear that he has six arms. You look away quickly and carry on walking — you don’t want to look again only to be proven wrong. You want to preserve that little second of magic strangeness for as long as you can.
The puddles on the street seem like they’re glowing with the light reflected from the neon streetlamps, and you weave your way carefully around them to avoid getting your feet wet. The night has a strange quality about it, almost as though it’s holding its breath.
Considering the combination of your pensive mood and the expectant air of the evening, you don’t feel surprised at all when you look up from the wet cobblestones to find the man standing only a few feet ahead of you.
He smiles like he’s nervous, his gaze tracking carefully over your face. In his hands, he’s holding flowers. Camellias, you think. It’s the first time since you first saw him on the train that hasn’t been a fleeting glance out of the corner of your eye— he’s here in front of you and he’s real and solid and sturdy. He seems more substantial than the streets around you, than your friends back at the pub had been.
“Do you remember me?” He asks, voice soft as though he’s afraid of the answer.
“Remember you?” You croak. It feels as though the words are catching inside your throat. “No. But I’ve seen you every night in my dreams for years.”
If that’s the answer he’s expecting, he doesn’t show it. He just keeps looking at you, your face, your body. You wonder exactly it is that he’s seeing. “These are for you.” He says eventually, holding out the flowers. “I didn’t- I wanted to bring you something, when I saw you again. And I know that you always liked the garden.”
He’s talking as if the places that you’ve dreamed about are real. It doesn’t come as the earth-shattering surprise you might have expected — rather, it feels like a key turning in an old lock. A click, and then a sense of yes, that’s right.
You take the flowers, and clutch them to your chest. They’re a fleshy pink, with a vibrant yellow centre. The petals are as soft as velvet. Holding them feels like holding a safety blanket. “Thank you.” It’s the only thing that you can manage to say right now. Your thoughts are too full, and nothing else makes it out of your mouth.
It’s rather startling, the feelings that bubble up in your chest. It feels like something has just been unlocked, as though you had stored away all this emotion somewhere deep in your ribcage and then forgotten about it only for it to resurface at this precise moment, for this precise person.
“Eijirou.” You croak. “Kirishima Eijirou.”
His whole face brightens, and his eyes sparkle. “Yes. That’s me. You do remember!”
They’re not quite memories, you don’t think. They come in dreamlike flashes — the garden, an ocean, train tracks, the feral snarling of a dragon with sharp teeth, hard work and hot food, friends.
“I’m sorry I took so long,” Kirishima is saying, his face open and earnest. “But I told you that I’d come and find you again, remember?”
You do remember, sort of. A flash of a warm hand holding yours, pushing you forward over a boundary between one world and another, and a goodbye whispered behind you that sounds like a promise.
“You saved me.”
Kirishima laughs, though his eyes look a little shiny. “It was the other way around, actually. I would have stayed trapped in that bathhouse forever, if it weren’t for you.”
“The bathhouse.” You murmur, wide-eyed. It was real, real, real.
“Things are different now.” He edges closer to you. He’s large and imposing and taller than you, but he’s hunched slightly in an attempt to make himself unthreatening. “That’s why it took so long for me to come for you. Things were changing. Me and Katsuki run the bathhouse now.”
Katsuki. In your mind's eye you see a boy with wild blond hair and a dangerous look in his eyes, a boy who gives you extra rice when he can manage and takes over parts of your chores when you get so tired that you’re fit to pass out.
“I didn’t mean to make you wait.” He says quietly, and the tide of emotion that you had just barely been holding at bay comes crashing over you. Before the first tear has welled over the edge of your eyelids, Kirishima has stepped forward and wrapped you in his arms. The flowers are crushed between your chests as you cry.
“I didn’t even know what I was waiting for.” You cry into his silk suikan.
“I’m sorry.” He whispers into your hair. “I’m here now. I’m not going to leave again.”
You don’t release your grip on him. You’re not willing to take the chance.
After a moment, Kirishima speaks again. “Are you ready to go?”
“Go?” You echo, finally pulling away. “Go where?”
“Home.” He says, and he means the bathhouse. He means the spirit world.
“You want me to work for you?”
“I want you to help us run it.” He corrects. The distinction is important for both of you — though the memories are distant, you both know what it feels like to have your names and voices erased so cleanly that it makes you wonder if you ever existed fully at all.
“I don’t know anything about running a bathhouse. Especially not one for spirits.” You say, but Kirishima just laughs.
“You were always a hard worker. You’ll learn as you go. That’s what we’ve all been doing.”
You want to say yes. The word beats in your head like a drum, and you can’t think of a good reason to say no. The bathhouse. Home. The chance to feel real and awake at the same time.
“Okay.” You say on a breath, staring at him with wide eyes. “Stay with me, this time.”
When Kirishima’s face lights up in a smile, it’s the first time that you think you can accurately describe someone as incandescently happy. “Good luck getting rid of me again.”
You laugh, feeling nearly delirious with relief and joy. It’s real. He’s real. He’s come back for you, and now you’re going back with him. You think you should probably feel nervous or hesitant, but this brief encounter has felt more solid and right than the rest of the night spent with distant school-friends made uncomfortable by your silences.
“So, how do we get there?” You ask, but Kirishima just grins at you like you should already know the answer.
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The train station is tucked away down an alley just off a busy main shopping district.
“It’s easy to miss if you don’t know exactly where you're going.” Kirishima tells you with a sharp smile, and it’s easy to believe. The red brick building that housed the train station is unmarked, and the trains couldn’t be seen from the main street. The alley itself is home to many curious sights -- paper lanterns bob overhead (though they don’t seem to be suspended by anything in particular), a yellowed flyer from the 1950s advertising Marlboro cigarettes drifts along on what seems to be a breeze despite the noticeable lack of wind, and three magpies sit on a wall wearing little golden timepieces on chains around their necks and caw in time with the ticking.
“Ready to go home?” Kirishima asks quietly. In his hand, two train tickets flutter in a non-existent breeze.
A family of mice scamper past your feet, pulling a miniature suitcase between them. A tall, thin woman wearing a blank white mask assists them onto the train.
You laugh at the whimsy of it all — it feels as though you’ve stepped into a fairytale, into a dream, into your childhood. “Yes,” You grin, “I’m ready.”
Kirishima beams back at you, and holds out a hand to help you onto the train. Finding a seat was easy — despite all the passengers you had seen boarding, the carriage was oddly empty. As soon as you’re seated, you sigh. It feels as though you’re sinking into an old overstuffed armchair, comfortable and familiar. When the whistle blows and the train starts moving, you turn eagerly to watch as the train begins to pick up speed. Within moments, you find that you can barely recognise the landscape blurring past the window — It seems that you’re zooming passed a beautiful sea-view, despite the fact that the city the train station was located in was conspicuously land-locked. You sigh happily and lean against your seat.
You still don’t remember everything about your experience in the spirit world all those years ago, but you think you remember hearing someone telling you “Once you meet someone you never really forget them. It just takes a while for your memories to return."
You make eye contact with Eijirou, who smiles back at you so fondly that it nearly hurts to look at. He’s changed so much from the boy in your dreams, in your memories. His eyes are no longer glassy and distant — now they’re shiny and expressive and so bright. His hair is longer too; still spiked and wild, but longer and curling softly over the curve of his neck and shoulders. He’s the boy your remember from all those years ago, but he’s also a man now. Grown, like you have, but smiling at you gently just like you’re ten years old again.
Through the window behind his head, the sunrise begins to bathe the water in delicate pinks and yellows. You’ll wait for as long as you need to for the memories to return, but even if they don’t that’s alright. You can just make new ones.
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fortune-fool02 · 4 years
Text
Autophobia
Dio Brando x female reader
Requested by: anonymous 
can i please request a fic where dio's lover has an extreme fear of being separated from him,, so she wakes up to not seeing him next to her so she panics & searches around his mansion for him to the point where she starts crying & then dio finds her while she's sobbing looking for him :(
Please enjoy. 
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Isolation. Separation. Alone. Regardless of whatever form it was in, [Name] hated it. The mere idea of being ripped away from those around her was enough to set the cold pins through her skin and poke at her bones. There had been too many occasions where such thing has happened, someone she had grown close to being snatched away from her or simply up and leaving her alone, never coming back. 
She couldn’t handle it. She had to be close to those she cared for. Close to Lord Dio. The man was unlike any other she had met before. His power, his presence, his words, all of it was captivating like a siren’s song to a sailor lost at sea. To be in his mere presence was enough to be a blessing to the [Hair colour] woman. To be in his arms was another experience altogether, to feel to at peace and safe from all the horrors of the world around them. A piece of Heaven in his hold, listening to his soft words whisper in her ear. [Name] had never felt so safe and loved like that before. Lord Dio, in turn, found her to be adorable like a kitten seeking attention and affection, something he simply could not deny her. 
Her arm slowly moved out in the bed, searching for the warmth of Lord Dio’s body only to meet nothing but the cool, silk sheets, sending a light spark of confusion through her as she forced her eyes open to look. The spot beside her on the large bed where Lord Dio would always lay was empty, wiping away the confusion and replacing it with the cold wave of panic and concern as she shot upright, eyes darting around the room to see if he was around. Much to her dismay, Lord Dio was not in the room. 
Cold, clutching panic latched onto her bones as she shot up out the bed, eyes wide and darting around for any sight of the golden haired man. Had he left her? Had something happened? Was he hurt somehow? Had he abandoned her? Those thoughts seeped their venom into her head as she rushed around the room and outside it, searching for Lord Dio. 
With dawn not even with them, the halls were only illuminated by the small glow of candles, flickering shadows that appeared as figures in the dark. Ones that stood tall and proud, just like Lord Dio, but proved to be nothing but flicks of lights. Tears pricked her eyes like thorns, a result of the tight, coiling wire around her chest and stomach, grasping dread clawing at her delicate organs as panic bubbled in her blood. She didn’t want to be alone, she didn’t want to be on her own again. She wanted to be by his side, by Lord Dio’s side, held by his embrace. 
Tears spilled down her cheeks, sobs clenching in her throat and burning her lungs. She couldn’t be alone, she needed him. The sobbing softly floated down the corridor, catching the attention of someone. 
“[Name], what is troubling you so?” The sound of his soothing, deep voice pulled her from her tears and towards his. Lord Dio stood there, shadows dancing along his body while his ember eyes pierced through the darkness, a sight that flooded all fear and dread from her body and flushed it with relief. She approached him and desperately wished to wrap her arms around him but she stopped, knowing her place and boundaries. 
“F-Forgive me, my Lord. I-I had just....I feared you were gone.” she tried to explain, her body still shaking with the sobs that racked her earlier. Lord Dio only looked at her, a poor girl was always so close to him and now she had been left alone. Poor girl. Lord Dio hummed softly and carefully scooped her up into his arms, holding her close like one would a frightened puppy or kitten. The [Hair colour] woman looked at him before nuzzling against him, holding onto him, earning a light smile from Lord Dio. 
“Don’t fret, my darling. I shall not be leaving you alone.” He softly cooed to her, carrying her back to his room and setting her down on the bed before sitting down himself and held her close. Dark claws gently brushing through her hair in a soothing manner as he held her. 
“Rest, [Name]. I shall be by your side when you awake again.” He spoke softly, his voice gentle, reassuring somewhat. [Name] hummed softly, nuzzling against him and holding onto him as she relaxed more, slowly allowing herself to fall back to sleep. She was safe. She was here in his arms. Lord Dio was here with her. 
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rafael-silva · 3 years
Text
guide me back (I’m lost without your light): a tarlos fic
“All available units respond to a 10-50 at the intersection of Sixth and North Lamar Boulevard. Multiple vehicle pile up.” “Dispatch, this is 363-H-20 responding. ETA three minutes.”
*
When Carlos and Mitchell respond to the call, the last thing Carlos expects is to find TK in the middle of the wreck. He races against time to keep TK awake and stable until fire and medical arrive, while sending out prayer after prayer that his time with TK hasn’t been cut short. That they haven’t run out of time.
for bad things happen bingo: tarlos + bloodstained clothes 
hurt tk strand, worried carlos reyes, established relationship, whump, angst, emotional hurt/comfort, hurt/comfort, kisses, blood, injury description, major character injury, angst with a happy ending
10.1k | on ao3
*****
“All available units respond to a 10-50 at the intersection of Sixth and North Lamar Boulevard. Multiple vehicle pile up.”
“Dispatch, this is 363-H-20 responding. ETA three minutes.”
The sun sits high in the sky as Carlos grips the steering wheel tightly while Mitchell releases her radio and flicks on the light bar and siren, blaring loudly as they head into the heart of downtown Austin.
It sounded serious, if all available units are being dispatched to the scene, meaning fire engines are being dispatched, too. Carlos fleetly wonders if the 126 will be called to the scene, but he knows he won’t be seeing TK since it’s the paramedic’s day off.
It’s difficult when one of them is working and the other is off; at least if they were both working, there are always chances of them meeting on calls, and if they were both off, well, those days were spent in utter happiness together, either spent in or out, it didn’t matter as long as they were spent together. They make it work, however, spending as much time together before one of them goes to work and then at night, cuddling on the couch or in bed, safe in each other’s arms after a long day.
Carlos hopes the accident isn’t as grave as he’s imagining but his gut is telling him otherwise. With a sinking feeling in his stomach, he realizes there’s a big possibility he might be late for the home dinner date he and TK had planned. TK had said he had a surprise for Carlos, and was clearly super excited about it. Carlos was looking forward to it and now…
Carlos’s gut is proven right when they round the corner and he catches sight of the crash from a few blocks away. Dread sets in his stomach the closer they get to the scene, other police cruisers pulling up at the same time.
He might need to tell TK that his shift may run long. He holds back at that, though, first wanting to get a full feel of how the rest of his shift will pan out.
Carlos parks and shares a concerned look with his partner before drawing in a deep breath and letting it out slowly. They hop out of the car and Carlos takes a quick survey of their surroundings, noticing that they had arrived at the scene before fire and medical.
Carlos starts moving towards where the accident is the worst, and well, it’s bad. Four cars seem to have harshly rear ended each other, the crushed metal an indication of how sudden and quick it had happened. He can’t really tell one car from the other, all of them mangled together in a way that tells Carlos there are definitely more than a few injuries sustained to the people who were in these cars.
He doesn’t have much time to draw any more conclusions because he’s frantically being flagged down by a man around his own age, who seems unharmed. Bystander, Carlos’s mind supplies.
Carlos jogs over as the man takes a few steps towards him and starts speaking.
“He’s stuck,” the man starts, leading Carlos to one of the cars, or what’s left of one, in the middle of the wreck. “The door on one side popped open from the force of the crash but the guy inside can’t move. And we didn’t want to move him. He’s on the opposite side of the backseat and he’s in rough shape, seems to be going in and out of consciousness.”
Carlos swallows and follows him, whoever this man is, Carlos is going to do everything he can to help him until fire and medical arrive.
“It’s good you didn’t move him, that might have caused more damage,” Carlos tells him, his legs moving quickly.
The closer he gets, the more Carlos is hit with a sense of familiarity towards the injured man. He frowns, his heart starting to race in his chest as he zeroes in on the figure slumped in the backseat.
And that side profile, Carlos can draw it with his eyes closed.
He freezes when the realization dawns on him. His legs stop moving, his feet nailed to the asphalt. It feels like his heart is about to leap out of his chest while his eyes go impossibly wide.
TK.
And no, no, no. It can’t be TK. He was just texting him less than twenty minutes ago. He’s worried his brain is playing a cruel trick on him, conjuring up this nightmare. Carlos shakes his head, earning himself a confused look from the man leading him, who has also stopped moving.
But Carlos doesn’t spare him a glance, his attention solely held by the man in the crushed car. And when said man weakly opens his eyes and they catch some light, Carlos knows beyond a doubt that this nightmare is in fact reality.
Those green eyes, even seeing them from the side and through an awkward angle, can only belong to the love of his life.
“No,” Carlos whispers as his heart plummets into his knees, his body heating up. “No, no,” he repeats and then his feet are finally moving again, and he’s running around another car, his eyes not leaving TK.
He briefly registers the man’s growing confusion but he just rushes past him, no time for explanation, the only thing mattering to him is getting to TK. Saving TK.
He only slows down when he’s right by TK’s side, with only the smashed door separating them. The window is shattered, the ground littered with broken pieces of glass that crunch underneath Carlos’s boots.
TK’s eyes have closed again, but Carlos can see his chest slowly rising and falling with each shallow breath he sucks in.
“TK?” Carlos speaks, the rest of the accident fading away. The movement around is in slow motion, sounds muted, the world narrowing to just him and TK. “TK, can you hear me?”
Carlos can’t even hear his own voice over the blood rushing in his ears, but by the way TK tilts his head an inch towards him, he heard him.
A beat. And then: “‘Los…”
Carlos lets out a breath he wasn’t fully aware he was holding, his shoulders sagging forward a little. “Hey, babe. I’m here, I’m here.”
Carlos runs his eyes over TK, and his heart breaks a little more at the bloody state the paramedic is in.
“I’m stuck,” TK wheezes. “Can’t move.”
“We’ll get you out, just hang on. Help is on the way,” Carlos replies, hoping his voice is steadier than it sounds to his own ears. He then turns his attention to the older man in the front seat. “Sir, are you okay?”
“Yeah,” the man nods. “I’m fine, nothing hurts too bad. The hit was harder from the back.”
Carlos’s fear increases at that piece of information. “You let me know if your pain changes,” he tells him before his attention is back on TK. “TK, can you tell me what hurts?”
“Head, chest…and side,” TK replies through gritted teeth, squeezing his eyes as a wave of pain shocks his nerves, running through his battered body. Everything feels like it’s on fire, every breath he tries to draw in hurts, and he’s tired, he’s so tired.
But he isn’t alone anymore, Carlos is here now. TK is aware that his odds aren’t good, based on his years of work experience, but he finds himself not panicking at that thought as much anymore. Because Carlos is right here. He would even go as far as saying he feels a little calm now, but what he can’t answer is whether that is due to shock or Carlos’s presence. TK decides to believe it’s courtesy of the latter. Because shock would be very bad.
He isn’t aware his eyes have drifted shut until the officer’s voice filters through, telling him to open them and TK manages to peel his eyelids open and faces Carlos’s worried gaze.
“Stay with me,” Carlos pleads, those brown eyes that TK loves so much filled to the brim with terror. “Don’t close your eyes, look at me. Focus on me.”
TK obliges. He loves looking at Carlos, loves running his hands over his face, his cheekbones, feeling Carlos smile against his touch. TK wants to reach out, to smooth out the worry engraved on Carlos’s forehead, in the creases that sit above his eyebrows, but he can’t move a muscle. He wants to reassure Carlos that he’s okay, but not only does he momentarily lose his voice, he also doesn’t know how true his statement would be. Because he’s now suddenly very much aware of the amount of blood running down his side, sticky and hot. The side glued to the crushed door.
He groans, feeling the panic start to rise again. Being stuck was already bad enough, but being stuck while also bleeding is far worse that TK doesn’t even want to think about it.
“Hey, hey,” Carlos’s voice returns. “Focus on me, it’s okay. I know it’s scary, but I’m right here.”
“Carlos,” TK cries out, a tear rolling down his cheek.
Carlos, very carefully, reaches his arm through the busted window, and with just as much caution, cups TK’s face and wipes the stray tear with the pad of his thumb. He’s aware of everything all at once, the way his hand shook as he moved it towards TK, how clammy TK’s skin feels, the beads of sweat rolling down his own neck and back.
“I’m right here.”
TK sniffs and nods as he leans into Carlos’s touch. It’s warm, and TK gravitates towards that warmth. The warmth that has become his home.
Carlos begins cataloging TK’s injuries: a cut near his temple that looks deep enough to need stitches, possible concussion, chest pain can be a result of the seatbelt tightening when the crash happened, but he can’t assess how badly TK’s side is hurt from his current position.
He doesn’t have much time to dwell on that, though, because TK is speaking a few moments later.
“My side…it’s bleeding…” TK murmurs once he’s gathered his voice, his mind suppling that he needs to tell Carlos. “I think it’s bad.”
The small amount of color remaining in Carlos’s face drains at TK’s words, his heart dropping further and it feels like he’s been drenched with a bucket of ice water. His mind freezes for a second before he’s shaking himself out of it. He needs to act, and quick.
“Can you reach it and apply pressure?” Carlos asks. “Easy though, slow movements.”
TK attempts to move his arm towards the injury but quickly grimaces and drops his arm.
“No,” TK’s voice shakes, the slight movement exhausting him further. “Hurts.”
“Shit,” Carlos’s own panic starts taking hold, evident in the way his hands start to shake again. They have to slow the bleeding if TK has any chance of making it out of this nightmare.
Then Carlos remembers that the other door is practically already ripped off the car. Making up his mind, he gives TK’s hand a squeeze and rushes to the other side of the car.
“Hang on, TK, I’m coming,” Carlos says as he quickly assesses the area where the door was once attached to the car.
It looks stable enough and the car isn’t tilted to either side or unbalanced, so Carlos carefully climbs in and pauses to see if his added weight caused any shift. Once there’s no evidence of that, he moves closer to TK, their thighs side by side.
Carlos reaches around TK with his left arm, eyes glued to his middle and surely enough, TK’s t-shirt is stained with blood. The officer has to swallow against his dry throat at the sight, there’s so much blood already and TK is looking paler by the second.
Carlos’s hand finds its target, and his fingers brush against the tip of the metal lodged into TK’s side. He feels sick to his stomach as he begins to apply as much pressure as he could without causing further damage or sinking the metal deeper into TK’s flesh.
TK whines at the pain jolting through his body, waking him up a little as he squeezing his eyes shut, more tears run freely down his face.
“I know, I know,” Carlos speaks, his tone apologetic.
TK’s eyes start to droop, the momentary adrenaline already wearing off and his head falls backwards against the headrest.
“No, no, TK,” Carlos eyes go wide, his voice strained. “Keep your eyes open, stay with me.”
“Carlos…” TK whispers.
“Right beside you, babe. I’m not going anywhere.”
“You’re his fiancé,” the older man’s voice reaches Carlos’s ears from the front seat.
Carlos turns to face him with a questioning look, his eyes drawing together at the statement.
“He was,” the driver pauses to breathe. “He was talking about you before the crash.”
Carlos sucks in a deep breath through his nose, nodding as his eyes begin to glisten with unshed tears. “Yeah,” he turns back to look at TK. “He’s the love of my life.”
TK is still clinging to consciousness and Carlos receives a small smile from him at his declaration.
“That’s it, baby. Stay with me,” Carlos pleads once more, closing his eyes and gently resting his forehead against TK’s uninjured temple, melting into him.
He keeps a steady hold on TK’s side, and senses TK weakly gravitating towards him even more, Carlos his lifeline. TK uses all his remaining energy to reach out into the small distance and latches his hand onto Carlos’s arm, wrapping his fingers there.
“I got you, Ty, I got you.”
A few moments later, the air around them fills with the roaring of sirens, getting closer and closer.
“Hear that, TK? Help is here,” Carlos says, instilling hope with every word.
He turns his head in the direction of the incoming fire trucks and ambulances, watching as red and blue color everything around. His eyes immediately find the bold 126 painted on the truck that comes to a halt on the edge of the crash site.
“Hey!” Carlos calls out for the young man who lead him here. “Direct them this way!” He nudges his head towards the team who are disembarking from the truck.
The man nods and starts running towards the firefighters.
“Hang on, TK, hang on,” Carlos whispers.
He looks back into the open and relaxes just a fraction when he spots Judd on the man’s heels, jogging towards him.
Carlos can pinpoint the moment Judd realizes who he’s moving towards, the firefighter’s eyebrow raising a little.
“Reyes?” Judd calls out before he’s reached the car.
“Judd, it’s TK,” Carlos wastes no time in responding.
Those three words have Judd’s eyes going wide, his speed picking up and he runs the remaining distance to the car, coming to a stop on the side TK’s jammed.
“He’s stuck and bleeding badly,” Carlos continues, looking past TK and at Judd through the broken window.
“Shit,” Judd mutters and then louder, in the direction of the rig: “Tommy! Nancy!”
Judd’s eyes roam over TK’s ashen face, the younger man’s eyes barely opened.
“Hey, brother,” Judd speaks, his voice carrying its natural strength but also soft and filled with concern. “You’re gonna be alright, just hang on.”
He gets a half-nod from TK in reply.
Tommy and Nancy approach the car, each of them clutching their equipment and medical bags, ready to get to work.
“It’s TK,” Judd tells them when they’re by his side. They both pause midair as they’re lowering the bags, their eyes going equally wide as they process Judd’s words.
Carlos can see the worry flash over their faces and they share a quick look of concern before they both switch back into paramedic mode. He knows what they’re thinking, that they have to be at the top of their game. TK is family, and he can feel their fear and pain, but they need to focus so they can save TK.
They both meet Carlos’s worried eyes before getting to work.
“Hey, TK,” Tommy gets closer to the crushed door, gloves on and clicks her pen light. Her voice is calm and gentle, her motherly tone helps even Carlos relax a little.
“Cap…” TK whispers.
“Follow the light, TK.”
She shines the pen into TK’s glassy eyes, his pupils responding to the light as they should, albeit a little weaker than she’d like.
“Talk to me, Carlos,” Tommy says while her attention is solely focused on TK. “Tell me everything.”
“He said his head, chest and side hurt, his side is bleeding badly. I have pressure on it and I can feel a piece of metal stuck in there,” he swallows, feeling the blood seeping through his fingers. “The bleeding slowed down a little but he’s already lost so much blood.”
Tommy nods, accepting the c-collar from Nancy and carefully placing it around TK’s neck to stabilize him.
Judd looks up when he hears the rest of the crew approaching, and after a brief glance with Carlos, Judd moves in their direction, seeking out Owen.
“Cap,” Judd shields Owen’s view of the wrecked car.
Owen frowns, but immediately sees through Judd’s worried eyes. “What is it?”
Judd takes a deep breath. He has always been a straightforward guy, he won’t start beating around the bush now. “It’s TK, he’s in that car.”
Carlos’s heart breaks even more at the gasp he hears from Owen, followed by rapid footsteps pounding the gravel as the captain rushes over.
He’s at the car from Carlos’s side and looking past his shoulder a few moments later, Owen’s eyes blown wide as they move from his son to his soon to be son-in-law.
“Carlos.”
“His side is bleeding,” Carlos tells Owen, more tears gathering in his eyes. “He couldn’t reach it to apply pressure and I had to do something.”
Owen nods, his eyes going back to TK, who’s barely moving. “It’s gonna be okay, son. You’re gonna be okay. We’re here.”
TK slowly opens his eyes the rest of the way and looks in Owen’s direction through his blurry vision. He tries to send a wordless message to his father and fiancé of I’m okay.
Owen gives him a smile, but it’s shakier than he intended.
“Here,” Tommy’s voice grabs their attention. She hands Carlos a large piece of gauze as Nancy moves to the front to check the driver.
Carlos begins to move, and TK instantly whimpers and tries to keep his already weak hold on the other man.
“Hey, hey, it’s okay, TK,” Carlos is quick to reassure him. “I’m not going anywhere.”
He maneuvers his free arm to take the piece of cotton and swiftly lifts his bloodied palm to cover TK’s wound with the gauze and returns the pressure there.
The team has gathered what was happening and crowd the car, Carlos is vaguely aware of Judd telling them they’ve got TK and they should go around the rest of the scene to help.
And then Judd is back, evaluating the situation and weighing their options.
“His breathing is getting worse,” Carlos announces with fright as TK’s hold on him starts to falter. “We need to get him out now.”
“The driver is doing okay, Cap,” Nancy chimes in. “Alert and his numbers are holding.”
Tommy nods. “We get TK out first. Carlos, is the metal connected to the door or is it separated?”
Carlos shakes his head. “Separated.”
“That’s good, makes busting the door open easier,” Judd nods.
“Judd, grab the—” Owen begins.
“Jaws, got them,” Judd finishes for Owen before running in the direction of their truck.
He returns less than a minute later, but it feels like forever for Carlos and Owen as they watch TK struggle to hold on.
“Come on, come on,” Owen whispers, his eyes not leaving his son’s battered form as Judd returns, pushes the piece of equipment into the mangled metal and starts to tear it apart.
Tommy and Nancy get the backboard ready in the meantime, ready to move as soon as it’s clear. A lot of movement erupts when the door is finally ripped open. Judd lowers the jaws to the ground, quickly reaching for the cutters he had also retrieved and cuts the seatbelt off TK. It takes Carlos’s brain a second to catch up with all the action and then his eyes land on Owen now standing on the other side behind Judd as both men make room for Tommy and Nancy.
They carefully place the tip of the backboard against the backseat cushion and Nancy and Judd carefully take hold of TK’s shoulders, moving him sideways and then guiding him to lie on the board. Carlos goes with them, the pressure he’s applying constant and he only lets go once he’s certain Nancy’s taking over, her hand firmly covering his.
He pulls back and watches as Judd and Owen carry TK over to the gurney. He wastes no time in getting out of the car himself, darting to TK’s side.
Once TK is out, Judd starts working on extracting the driver.
Tommy and Nancy work in unison, the Paramedic Captain covering TK’s face with an oxygen mask while Nancy inserts an IV in his arm and runs a line. Carlos then notices that Owen is applying pressure to TK’s side with one hand while the other runs through TK’s hair.
Carlos takes TK’s hand, giving it a squeeze.
“Let’s move,” Tommy instructs a moment later.
Nancy takes over holding pressure as they push the gurney towards the ambulance, Carlos and Owen trailing behind.
“Carlos?”
Carlos turns at his partner’s voice, coming from a few feet away.
Mitchell is about to ask where he’s been but her eyes go wide instead when they land on TK lying on the gurney.
“I have to—”
She’s nodding before Carlos finishes his sentence. “Go, I’ll sort it out.”
“Thank you,” Carlos gives her the best grateful smile he could muster before hopping in after TK and Tommy.
“I’ll be right behind you,” Owen says once TK is inside the rig.
Carlos nods, taking a seat on the small bench.
Nancy shuts the doors and races to the driver’s seat, climbing in and the sirens wail as they start to move.
Owen watches the ambulance drive away, the hot pit in his stomach growing with each passing second.
Carlos and Tommy don’t exchange words, each of them focusing on TK. Tommy is monitoring his vitals, giving him fluids and administering a local nerve blocker to help with the pain.
Carlos clutches TK’s free hand with both of his own, closing his eyes and willing his racing heart to slow down a beat. He works on his breathing, steading his rhythm but he can’t help the stray tear that falls when he opens his eyes and looks at TK.
Carlos’s chest is in knots, his heart in pieces, TK is too still, too pale.
It’s almost like TK feels his fiancé’s anguish and pain, and on some level, he does because he’s weakly turning in Carlos’s direction. It’s always been a thing TK and Carlos talk about—the way they sense each other and what the other needs and this moment is yet another one to prove that connection true.
“It’s okay, ‘Los,” TK manages, his voice frail and muffled even more by the oxygen mask.
Carlos sniffs, moving closer to TK so he’s in his line of sight and nods. “Yeah, baby. It’s okay, you’re okay.”
“I love you,” TK whispers.
“I love you too, baby,” Carlos reciprocates. “Hold on.”
TK nods, a promise Carlos clings onto with everything he’s got. And he prays today isn’t the day he loses TK.
They’ve only just begun.
*****
It’s a short but tense ride to the hospital.
Tommy had examined TK’s chest and Carlos’s assumption that it was the seatbelt that hurt him is proven right by the massive red bruise already formed down the paramedic’s torso. Carlos had drawn in a sharp breath at seeing it, heartbroken that TK has been injured to that extent. Tommy had also told Carlos that TK may have also suffered a bruised lung from the force of the seatbelt against his chest.
A team is already awaiting their arrival, tearing the ambulance doors open as soon as it comes to a halt in front of the Emergency Room entrance. Tommy relays all the information as they push TK inside and through the hallways. They reach a point where Tommy, Carlos and Nancy can’t follow and Carlos has to reluctantly let go of his tight hold on TK’s hand.
His heart shatters as he watches the doctors and nurses wheel TK away, feeling like he’s been ripped away from him.
He stands there for what seems like hours, watching the hallway long after TK was pushed into the elevator, Carlos’s eyes fixed on its closed doors. He feels a hand land on his shoulder, and he doesn’t need to turn to know who it is.
“Come on, Carlos,” Tommy’s soft voice reaches him.
Carlos lets her lead him towards the waiting area and he drops into one of the plastic chairs, hating how familiar they have become.
He shakes his head then drops it slightly and only looks up when a few wet wipes are in his line of sight.
He gratefully accepts them but doesn’t move for a few moments after. His gaze is focused on his own hands, his hands that are covered with TK’s blood. And his ring, his ring is coated in crimson, nearly obscuring the silver underneath and it makes his stomach churn in an unnatural way.
Carlos closes his eyes, going back to the day TK had slid this ring onto his finger, to the joy and contentment they had both felt, they way they basked in each other’s love when Carlos had said yes. A tear rolls down the officer’s cheek, one he doesn’t bother wiping away. He sniffs, opening his eyes and begins cleaning his hands.
Once the evidence of TK’s accident and injury is transferred to the wipes, Nancy takes them from Carlos’s hold and throws them away before sitting down, too.
The silence stretches, the feel and sound of the hospital nearly haunting. Owen’s arrival breaks it, Carlos looking up when he hears his name being called from afar.
“Carlos,” Owen’s eyes are wide and movement quick.
“Owen,” Carlos gets to his feet in time for the Captain to throw his arms around him in a hug, which Carlos returns.
Owen gives Carlos a squeeze before pulling back. “Did they say anything?”
Carlos shakes his head. “They took his straight up, didn’t say much of anything.”
Owen nods and sits on the chair next to Carlos’s as he too returns to it.
Tommy and Nancy’s radios spring to life a little bit later, and they reluctantly leave, promising to be back as soon as they can.
Carlos starts rolling his ringer over his finger, a gesture he does when he’s nervous or anxious. TK would always notice, and he’d reach out, taking Carlos’s hand and holds it tightly; a silent promise that he isn’t alone, and that TK’s got him. Carlos would give anything to feel TK’s tender touch.
He notices that his ring is still speckled with blood.
“I’ll be right back,” Carlos says as he rises from his place. “Just going to the bathroom.”
Owen nods. “Take your time.”
Carlos follows the signs to the nearest bathroom and looks at himself in the mirror as he gets closer to the sinks. The bathroom is empty, his boots echoing in the space, his eyes not leaving his exhausted reflection staring back at him. All the color has been drained from his face, his eyes a stark red against his pale skin and his usually neat curls are out of place. His eyes drift lower until they stop at his waist where there’s a large, dark stain. His uniform is stained with TK’s blood.  
He swallows as he turns on the faucet and lets the water run down at the coldest temperature before sticking his hands under it and working the remaining traces of blood off his ring. He momentarily relishes the cool sensation against his skin, but he soon breaks watching the pink-tinted water swirl down the drain.
It feels like TK is getting further and further away from him as each second passes by. He feels like he’s losing TK.
Helplessness settles in his bones, barely turning off the water and he grips the marble to support himself as his entire body starts to shake with the force of his oncoming sobs. A cry rips through his throat and he tightens his hold on the marble, afraid that his knees will no longer hold him up and he’ll crumble to the ground if he lets go.
He feels the fear crawling underneath his skin, the terror ringing through his whole being, the longing, the pain…it all washes over him at the same time, and he almost collapses from the weight of it. But he holds on. TK needs him to hold on. So he draws in a deep breath, stands up straight and splashes icy water over his face a few times.
Carlos returns to the waiting area with swollen eyes and Owen runs a hand up and down his back once he’s seated next to him once again, patting his shoulder before pulling back.
“We…we were planning on going over to my parents’ for dinner this weekend,” Carlos’s shaky voice slices through the silence that settles over them. “Our schedules lined up and TK was so excited. He,” he pauses, a small smile forming on his face. “He was saying how we should bake something to take to dinner. Chocolate chip cookies. They’re his go-to when it comes to baking,” he trails off, his hands connecting and he starts nervously fidgeting, rubbing his hands together.  “Chocolate chip cookies,” he whispers.
“They were always his favorite kind of cookies when he was a kid,” Owen says.
Carlos turns to look at Owen, his features broken and eyes filled with fragments of loss and aching. “He’s going to be okay, right? He has to be. He…has to be okay.”
“He’s strong, and he’s in the best of hands. He’s going to fight to come back to us, to come back to you, Carlos. The happiest I’ve ever seen my son was when he was with you, even in the beginning, when you were still figuring things out, there was something different about him, I could see it, I could feel it. He seemed lighter, brighter. His eyes lit up. I didn’t want to pry or push to know more, but when I saw you together, I knew. You were the missing piece he needed, you helped make him better, stronger. He’s going to come back to that.”
“It was the same with me. He saved me, in so many ways,” Carlos expresses.
“You saved each other,” Owen replies with a smile, giving Carlos’s knee a squeeze.
Carlos and Owen move to the waiting room on the surgical floor a little while later. Owen sits down on an identical plastic chair while Carlos paces around the room.
He stops when he looks out into the hallway and sees the rest of the team making their way towards them, all wearing the same concerned look on their faces.
“We got here as fast as we could,” Judd says as they step inside.
“Have you heard anything yet?” Marjan asks, her eyebrows drawn together.
Owen shakes his head. “He’s been in surgery for almost two hours.”
“He’s a strong kid, he’ll make it through,” Judd speaks with a steady voice.
“I should go call my mom, let her know what happened,” Carlos starts walking towards the door.
Paul pats Carlos’s shoulder as he passes him, and Carlos responds with an appreciative nod.
Carlos’s short trip to go outside is a haze, moving robotically until he’s stepping into the open air, the sun still high in the sky. It’s hot, Carlos closes his eyes and tilts his head up in the direction of the sun, letting its warmth seep into his skin. He takes a deep breath as he opens his eyes, pulls out his phone and he notices a few texts from Mitchell. He makes a mental note to reply later and moves to the phone icon, touching his mother’s contact from his favorites list.
One ring, two rings, three rings…
“Carlitos!”
“Mami…”
Andrea immediately picks up on his broken tone. “What’s wrong, mijo?”
“It’s…There was an accident…a car pile up downtown and…TK, he…he was in it,” Carlos’s voice cracks.
“Oh, Dios,” Andrea draws in a sharp breath. “How is he?” She asks and Carlos can hear rustling and movement in the background now.
“He…he lost a lot of blood, Ma. He was stuck in the car and his side was hurt…they took him straight to surgery and we haven’t heard anything yet,” Carlos sniffs.
“Where are you? I’m on my way,” Andrea says.
Carlos can hear the emotion in his mother’s voice and he knows she’s trying to keep her worry and fear for TK from breaking through the phone. She’s always been Carlos’s rock, strong and steady, and he can tell by her tone that she’s keeping it together for him. Still, though, he can hear the slight waver in her voice at the knowledge that her soon to be son-in-law is badly injured, currently undergoing surgery.
Since the moment TK was officially introduced to Carlos’s parents, they welcomed him into their family with wide, open arms. They had immediately liked him and adored him, Andrea happily whispering it into Carlos’s ear at the end of that very night. They saw the love between him and their son, and it had uplifted Andrea and Gabriel’s spirits and filled their own hears with so much love and glee.
And when Carlos had called them one night, voice filled with bliss and excitement, telling them that TK had proposed to him, Andrea and Gabriel wept tears of joy.
Knowing how much Andrea loves TK, telling her that he was hurt is one of the hardest things Carlos has ever had to do.
“We’re at West Park Memorial,” Carlos replies.
With a promise from Andrea to be there shortly, they end the call. He returns to the waiting room a few minutes later, everyone’s eyes landing on him. Carlos feels shrunk, his shoulders drawn in, his body feeling so heavy.
“She’s on her way,” he says before turning to stare into the direction of the operating rooms.
“No news yet,” it’s Judd who speaks next, reading Carlos’s mind.
Carlos nods and returns to his seat next to Owen.
Silence falls onto the room, everyone doing little things to keep themselves busy. Mateo praying, Marjan and Paul standing and pacing, Judd grabbing a couch pillow and holding it against his chest, Owen’s head is thrown back against the wall with his eyes closed and Carlos’s leg starts bouncing up and down while he fidgets with his hands. His fingers gravitate towards his ring, the one tangible piece of TK he has with him in this moment. Carlos always gravitates towards TK.
The team eventually get called away to a rescue with their promises too to return as soon as they can.
Carlos’s phone rings and a glance at his screen tells him it’s his mother.
“Ma,” Carlos answers.
“Hi, mijo. I’m walking in now, where are you?”
“We’re in the waiting room on the surgical floor,” Carlos tells her.
“Okay, I’ll be there in a couple of minutes.”
Carlos spots Andrea hurrying through the hall, handbag clutched against her side soon after they hang up.
“Carlitos,” Andrea breaths as she steps into the room.
Carlos walks over to her and falls against her as she wraps him in a tight hug.
“It’s okay, mijo. Va a estar bien,” she whispers reassuringly, holding him in a steady grip. It’s going to be okay.
Carlos returns the embrace, burying his face in his mother’s neck, more tears spring to his eyes at being held by his mother and feeling her safety and comfort.
There’s a considerable height difference between Carlos and Andrea, but right now, Carlos may as well be a little boy and she a giant. Her protective hold on him is steady and grounding.
Once they pull back, Andrea cups Carlos’s face and wipes the fallen tears with the pads of her thumbs.
“Any news?”
Carlos shakes his head.
Andrea walks over to Owen, who gets up and they exchange a quick hug.
“He’s going to be fine,” Andrea says as she takes a seat next to her son.
Carlos nods, his eyes drifting back to his ring.
“There was a missing ingredient,” Andrea says after a while.
Carlos frowns as he turns to look at her.
“I was talking to him this morning, I sent him the family recipe for tamales,” she explains. “He wanted to surprise you but there was one missing thing.”
“Our dinner date tonight…that’s why he was out, he was going to the store,” Carlos connects the dots, eyes filling with tears.
Andrea nods.
“That was his surprise,” the realization dawns on Carlos. “He knows tamales are my favorite,” a small smile forms on his face.
Andrea places her palm on the nape of Carlos’s neck and pulls him gently towards her. He goes easily and rests his forehead against her shoulder. She whispers comforting words in Spanish as she runs her fingers over Carlos’s short hair just above his neck. He closes his eyes, evening out his breathing as he soaks up his mother’s comfort.
*****
Carlos is staring into nothingness almost an hour later, his eyes glued to to the hallway but unseeing. His mind on TK, all figures that pass through and walk the hallway blurred. Until one doctor is walking towards the waiting room, his form getting clearer and clearer as Carlos forces his vision to focus on him.
The doctor is visibly tired, his face crunched up, still wearing his surgical cap as he enters the room. Carlos can’t read him, and that worries him even more. He braces himself, swallowing as the doctor starts speaking.
“Family of Tyler Strand?”
“TK,” Owen corrects as he gets to his feet. “How’s my son?”
Carlos and Andrea follow suit, the tension building in the small space.
The doctor nods at Owen. “TK made it through,” he offers them a kind smile.
The collective breath Owen, Carlos and Andrea were holding is released as they breathe out a sigh of relief. Carlos closes his eyes, letting the doctor’s words sink in, sagging forward a little. He feels Andrea’s hand running up and down his back, grounding him and he leans into her warm touch.
“There were some complications, however,” the doctor continues. “We were mostly concerned about the amount of blood he lost, which caused his blood pressure to drop. His numbers were low during the surgery but we were able to keep him stable and with some blood transfusions, his blood pressure began to improve. The metal shard nicked his kidney but it didn’t cause major damage, we were also able to repair the laceration. Brain scans were all normal, indicating no brain injury. His chest is bruised and he has a minor lung contusion from the force of the seatbelt, but that will heal on its own. He’s young and healthy, I expect him to make a full recovery.”
“Can we see him?” Andrea asks, knowing it’s on Carlos’s mind and also knowing Carlos is still processing the doctor’s prognosis.
The doctor nods. “He’s currently in recovery and he can have visitors once he’s settled in a room after some observation. I’ll make sure a nurse comes to inform you when he’s ready.”
“Thank you so much, doctor,” Owen extends his hand.
The doctor nods once more, shaking Owen’s hand. “He’ll be home in no time.”
Carlos is rolling his ring on his finger and nervously bouncing his leg a while later when a young nurse approaches them.
“TK is ready for visitors,” she announces with a smile.
Owen turns to look at Carlos. “Go,” he urges.
“Are you sure?” Carlos asks.
Owen nods. “I’m sure, I’ll stop by to see him in a while.”
Owen pats Carlos’s shoulder as the officer gets to his feet and follows the nurse towards TK’s room.
“I’ll be back in an hour to check on him,” the nurse says as they come to a halt in front of a closed door. “The nurses’ station is down the hall if you need anything, or you can just press the call button near the bed.”
“Thank you,” Carlos says, taking a deep breath and pushing the door open.
He knew what to expect, he knew what his eyes would land on once he stepped into the room but still, seeing TK looking so small and still in the hospital bed shakes Carlos to his core.
An ache bolts up and down his body as he makes his way towards TK, his footsteps echoing off the walls, the only sound aside from the beeping of the heart monitor. He doesn’t take his eyes off his fiancé as he lowers himself on the chair situated next to the bed, watching as the paramedic’s chest rises and falls with each breath he takes.
Carlos is at least glad to see that TK has regained some color but it’s the stillness that also makes the officer uneasy. TK is always active, even when he’s asleep, twisting and turning in bed every now and then. Carlos would say he’s a light sleeper, he loved when TK started spending the night in the early days of their relationship. Though TK’s restlessness would sometimes wake Carlos from his slumber, he’d wrap an arm around TK’s middle and drift off to sleep again only for it to happen again a few hours later. Carlos never minded that, though, he’d be woken up by many things over the years, and being woken up by TK’s movement is by far his favorite.
Eventually, those movements from the younger man through the night had become a source of comfort for Carlos over the months, a reminder that TK is right next to him, in his bed. It grounded Carlos, and a sleepy smile would spread over his face as he gravitates towards those movements, warmth spreading through his body.
But here, right now, Carlos shivers, an icy sensation darting through his nerves. TK’s stillness is wrong, all wrong and so unlike TK is breaks Carlos’s heart all over again.
Carefully, Carlos reaches out, clasping TK’s hand in his own and prays that he can feel the familiar pressure.
“Hi, baby,” Carlos eventually speaks, his voice hoarser than he expected. “I’m here and you’re okay. They took really good care of you and you’ll be back on your feet in no time. I just…I miss you, Ty.”
The only response Carlos gets is the steady beeping of the heart monitor.
He sighs, running his thumb over TK’s knuckles. “I miss your voice, your smile, those beautiful green eyes of yours…your kiss. Come back to me, babe. This is only our beginning, we still have so much to do together. And I’ll be right here, right by your side, always. I’m not going anywhere,” Carlos vows.
Some time later, Carlos is so focused on TK and watching him, he doesn’t hear the knock on the door or it being pushed open until he senses another presence in the room.
He turns to see Owen stepping in, and stops by the foot of the bed.
“He looks better,” the Captain says, his eyes glued to his son.
Carlos nods, and continues running his fingers through TK’s hair.
“Your mom is heading to your place to pack a bag for you and TK,” Owen adds after a few moments. “She said to tell you to call or text her if there’s anything in specific you’d like her to get. And she’s also getting you some food.”
Carlos nods again. “I don’t think I’ll be able to eat, though.”
Owen’s eyes soften. “I know, but you have to keep your strength up. He’s going to need you when he wakes up. You need to take care of yourself so you can take care of him.”
Carlos knows Owen is right, so he doesn’t argue. “Thank you,” he tells Owen.
“Thank you,” Owen reciprocates. “You saved his life.”
“Part of me hopes I could have done more, I felt so helpless just…I wish I could have done more,” Carlos drops his head.
“Hey, Carlos,” Owen walks over so he’s behind the officer. He places a hand on Carlos’s shoulder and gives him a supportive squeeze. “You did everything you could, I know you did. I’ve seen so many accidents to know that in that pile up today, TK’s chances were…” he trails off, shaking his head. “His chances weren’t good. If it wasn’t for you, TK wouldn’t be here right now.”
The mere thought of that brings tears to Carlos’s eyes. “A guy flagged me down and…I followed him and then I realized it was TK and…my whole world stopped.”
Owen nods. “I hate that you had to go through that but…part of me is glad it was you who got to him. Because I know you would have done, and did do, everything you can to keep him alive. You climbed into the wrecked car, and that says everything.”
Carlos moves his hand to cup TK’s face, lightly tracing his cheekbone with the tip of his thumb. “I would do anything to make sure he’s okay.”
A moment of silence washes over them as Owen dips his hand into his pocket and pulls it out, fist closed before opening his palm in front of Carlos.
“Here,” Owen says.
Carlos looks down into Owen’s open hand and a tear rolls down his cheek when he sees TK’s ring there.
“The nurse gave me his stuff after she lead you here. I thought you should hold on to it for him,” Owen explains.
Carlos sniffs, reaches out and takes the ring. He secures it in a fist and brings his hand over his heart, holding it there before leaning forward and brushing a kiss to TK’s temple.
*****
Owen stays until Andrea is knocking on the door, walking into a room carrying a duffel bag and a brown paper bag. The delicious smell immediately hits Carlos and his stomach rumbles. His mother must have heard it because she gives him a knowing smile.
Owen excuses himself a few minutes later, making Carlos promise to call if anything changes. With one final glance at his son, Owen leaves.
Carlos settles on the small table in the corner of the room as he unwraps the food his mom brought him. Andrea stands near the bed and plants a tender kiss to TK’s forehead then sits in the chair previously occupied by Carlos.
Carlos watches the sweet exchange and feels his heart flutter in his chest at the sight. It’s such a simple gesture but it speaks volumes of the way Andrea had come to love TK and happily welcome him into the family. Carlos had witnessed TK and Andrea growing closer and closer over the course of their relationship and it had made him happier than words could express. He’d smile, his heart soaring as he watched them in conversation or watched TK help Andrea in the kitchen, talking about anything and everything, while preparing dinner together at the Reyes ranch.
There’s pain and sadness in his heart at seeing Andrea sit next to TK’s hospital bed. And even more when he hears his mother’s broken whisper of oh, amor, as her eyes roam over TK’s battered face and he can tell she’s imagining the layers of bandages hidden underneath his gown.
Carlos can tell she’s struggling, trying to remain strong for both him and TK. Because not only is Andrea’s Carlos’s rock and support, but she is also TK’s.
“It’s okay, Ma,” Carlos reassures her. There’s so many layers to those three words, and she catches on to each and every one.
She gives him a small, sad smile, her eyes swimming with unshed tears.
“Your dad sends his love, and he said he’ll be by to visit TK soon, once he’s awake and strong,” Andrea says a little while later, after Carlos had finished eating, freshened up, changed into sweats and a hoodie, and returned to TK’s side.
She was about to get up to vacate his seat then, but Carlos shook his head and gestured for her to remain seated there. He dropped into the chair on the other side of the bed, the one Owen had grabbed from near the wall and had been sitting in.
Visiting hours were coming to an end and Andrea was getting ready to leave. With a gentle pat to TK’s cheek, she gets to her feet and clutches her handbag, Carlos following her.
“Carlitos,” she starts but Carlos is quickly shaking his head, knowing what she’s going to say.
“I can’t leave him,” he answers.
Andrea sighs. “It’s going to be busy in here tonight, they’ll be checking on TK every couple of hours and you need to rest, too.”
“I know, but I won’t be able to sleep if I do go home either. I’ll stay wide awake, worrying and wondering and going back home now, going back to our bed, without him or without knowing he’s really okay…I can’t. At least staying, I can grab an hour here and there when they aren’t checking on him.”
Andrea nods after a moment. She knew deep down that Carlos would stay, hence the bag she had packed. She’s cupping Carlos’s face, caressing his cheek before pulling him into a hug.
He goes easily, wrapping his arms around his mother and returning the hug. Her strong hold on him gives him strength himself, almost transferring some of hers to him and he soaks it all up.
“He’s going to be just fine,” Andrea whispers, kissing Carlos’s cheek as they separate.
Carlos nods.
“I love you, mijo,” Andrea expresses. “I love you both.”
“We love you, too, Ma.”
After a similar promise to Andrea like the one made to Owen, she leaves, grabbing the bag sitting next to the door containing Carlos’s bloodstained uniform on her way out.
Carlos returns to his original place next to the bed, his hand going back to TK’s.
“It’s just you and me now, babe.”
*****
It starts with one slow movement. It’s so slow Carlos would have probably missed it if he weren’t watching TK as closely as he is.
The sun has climbed high in the sky, the hours ticked by from the time Carlos had given up on sleep around dawn. It was a night filled with fitful and restless sleep, as he had expected and between the nurse checking on TK and Carlos’s own worry, the officer managed to get three hours of shuteye.
He couldn’t sleep past the moment light cracked through the darkness of the sky above, so he got up, running a hand through his loose curls and stretched his aching muscles. The sun slowly got higher and stronger, painting the sky in streaks of orange, yellow and red, the colors morphing together in a magical way. He watched the process through the thin curtain, getting lost in it for a few moments before directing his attention back to TK.
TK who still hadn’t woken up. Who hasn’t even stirred.
Carlos was awake during the nurse’s more recent visit and she had assured him that it was perfectly normal, that TK’s body still needed some rest and that TK is doing well. He thanked her, giving her a smile that doesn’t reach his eyes followed by a nod when she mentioned there’s a coffee station just down the hall.
He feels TK’s ring sitting in his pocket, and he longs for the moment when he’ll able to slip it back on his finger, where it belongs.
He kept a positive attitude, repeating the nurse’s comforting words in his mind over and over, clinging to them as more minutes passed by with no indication from his fiancé of waking up.
“Come back to me, baby,” Carlos had whispered, giving TK’s hand a light squeeze.
He eventually left the room for a quick trip to the mentioned coffee station, and was back by TK’s side in a matter of minutes.
He kept himself occupied replying to texts he had received—from Mitchell, some of his other colleagues at the precinct, and most recently the 126 group chat, while keeping an eye on TK, as well.
The texts were all replied to and the coffee had long been consumed when the slow movement from the bed catches Carlos’s attention.
A small nudge of TK’s head to side, his eyes still closed. For a second, Carlos thinks his mind is playing a trick on him. But then it happens again, in the other direction and that has Carlos moving forward, heart picking up speed in his chest.
“TK?” Carlos calls. “TK, can you hear me?”
His heart is on its way to sinking from the lack of response from the paramedic, but instead flutters because TK is slowly opening his eyes and finding Carlos through the haze.
Carlos’s face breaks into a smile that does reach his eyes this time, said eyes also filling with tears at the sight of the green irises he has so terribly missed.
“Hi, baby, hi,” Carlos continues, his voice soft.
“‘Los,” TK breaths, his voice scratchy and low but it’s his voice and Carlos can almost weep at his nickname that only TK uses.
“I’m here, I’m here. You’re okay,” Carlos reassures him. “Everything is going to be just fine.”
Carlos’s hand moves to cup TK’s face, caressing his cheek and his heart sings when TK summons all the energy he can and leans into Carlos’s touch.
“Get some more rest, babe, I’m not going anywhere,” Carlos says when he notices TK drifting back to sleep.
Watching TK’s chest rise and fall in a steady rhythm now, TK’s ring in Carlos’s pocket feels lighter.
*****
The sun is getting lower when TK wakes up again. Andrea had passed by and joined Carlos for lunch a couple of hours before, Carlos feeling better and able to eat properly.
He was sitting in his usual spot on the chair next to the bed, mindlessly going through his phone and switching between apps when the same nudge of TK’s head pulls his attention, albeit it’s a little more frantic than the previous ones.
“Hey, hey, baby,” Carlos gets closer to TK, eyes on his face.
TK’s eyes are faster in opening this time, landing on Carlos and then looking around the room.
“Carlos?”
“Right here, I’m right here.”
“What…” TK’s eyebrows draw together, confusion written all over his face.
“It’s okay, you’re okay,” Carlos takes hold of TK’s hand. “You were in an accident, you were hurt pretty bad but they took care of you and everything’s okay. Do you remember?”
TK nods after a second and swallows against his dry throat.
“Do you want some water?”
TK nods again.
Carlos grabs the plastic cup from the nightstand and guides the straw through TK’s parched lips. “Easy, slow sips.”
“How—how bad is it?” TK asks once he’s done drinking.
Carlos sighs as he returns the cup. “We don’t have to talk about that now.”
“Please…I…I need to know,” TK says with a low tone.
After a moment, Carlos nods. “You were stuck in the backseat, you had some cuts and scraps, a concussion, bruise from the seatbelt and…there was a piece of metal lodged in your side. You lost a lot of blood, and I tried to keep pressure as much as I could but I didn’t want to hurt you more and…” he sucks in a shaky breath.
TK uses his energy to squeeze Carlos’s hand, knowing where the officer’s mind is going, taking him back to the horrific accident scene. TK squeezes Carlos’s hand to ground him and bring him back to the present.
“Never in a million years had I expected to see you in that crash…I was actually thinking the opposite, that I won’t see you because it’s your day off. But then the universe flipped the table on me and there you were…” Carlos trails off and then shakes his head. “I’m sorry, you just woke up, this…this isn’t what you should be hearing.”
It’s TK’s turn to gently shake his head. “Hey, there’s nothing to apologize for. Whatever you need to let out, and everything you’re feeling and thinking…I’m here to listen, no matter what.”
“I don’t want to overwhelm you,” Carlos lowers his gaze.
“Look at me, baby, look at me. You can never overwhelm me…I know how tough this has been, and I’m so sorry you had to go through that.”
Carlos tightens his hold on TK’s hand. “I was…so scared. I felt so helpless and it felt like you were being ripped away from me. And for a moment you were, when they wheeled you away and it broke me, in that moment, I shattered,” the tears get heavier in his eyes and with a blink, a tear falls and streaks down his cheek.
TK’s own eyes well up at seeing the pain and heartbreak drawn on Carlos’s face and coating his voice, wanting nothing more than to take it all away.
“I remember coming to after I blacked out from the initial crash and it was…terrifying. My mind hadn’t completely caught up with what happened and once it did, I was really scared,” TK sniffs. “I felt so alone. But you know what? When I saw you, well, at first I thought I was dreaming but then you reached out to me and touched me and it felt real, you felt real and warm and you were right there…I knew in my heart you were there and I wasn’t scared anymore. I didn’t feel alone anymore. I knew you would save me, like you did so many times before.”
More tears roll down Carlos’s cheeks at TK’s words.
“And you did. You saved me, ‘Los.”
Carlos lunges forward, taking TK’s face gently in his hands and plants a kiss on TK’s forehead.
“You saved me just as much,” Carlos whispers, looking into TK’s eyes where brown meets green, and there’s so much said without needing words, so much love communicated and felt. Carlos leans in, first touching their foreheads together and then brushing a tentative kiss to TK’s lips. And Carlos feels whole again.
“Also,” Carlos starts once he pulls back. “We’re definitely making those tamales once we’re back home.”
“You know?”
Carlos nods. “Ma told me. Missing one ingredient.”
“Yeah…I wanted to surprise you. You’ve been working so hard lately and I wanted to do something for you,” TK expresses.
“That means everything, TK. I just hate that you got hurt, I know neither of us could control what happened but still…I hate that it happened.”
TK nods. “But I’m here and I’m okay.”
“You are,” Carlos drops a kiss to TK’s cheek this time. “And one more thing,” he adds, a hand digging into his pocket.
He opens his palm in front of TK to reveal his ring and TK looks up at him, eyes glistening.
“I believe this belongs to you,” Carlos holds out his free hand to TK.
TK carefully lifts his hand and gives it to Carlos.
He watches as Carlos slides the ring on his finger, the familiar weight of it a comfort. He closes his eyes when Carlos brushes a kiss to the ring now sitting where it belongs, relishing in the touch.
“I love you, Ty, now and forever.”
Carlos's eyes are so soft and filled with love and adoration, it makes TK's heart swell with just as much love. He smiles, knowing he's found a home in Carlos. And he knows with his whole being that Carlos has found one in him, too.
“I love you too, ‘Los, always.”
And when TK gives Carlos the smile that’s reserved for only him, Carlos knows in his heart that they’re going to be just fine.
107 notes · View notes
thewritewolf · 3 years
Text
Night to Remember
Summary: Adrien wakes up to three videos from his soon-to-be wife, one for each day she'd been gone for her bachelorette party.
Hello and welcome! It’s been a hot second since I updated this series last, but I got here eventually! This time we’ve got a one shot on our hands and like usual, this story stands on its own pretty well. I’ll link to the other stories in case this one catches your attention
Enjoy!
Part 1: Five Times (and the Lucky One)
Part 2: Just Between Us
Part 3: Eating Habits
Part 4: Adrien Agreste and the Long Delayed Proposal
Read on Ao3
The soft rays of morning landed gently on Adrien’s face, the warm glow slowly rousing him from sleep. He rolled over, putting an arm over the opposite side of the bed to pull Marinette closer to him. 
When his hand simply hit empty blankets and pillow, his face scrunched up in irritation. He propped himself up on his elbows and squinted, eyes yet to adjust to the light of dawn, at the space beside him. Just as he feared, it was empty.
Sluggishly, the gears in his head began to turn. Why wasn’t she here? Did she go to make breakfast? No, she’d never get up early by herself. 
Was there an akuma? A cold spear of panic went through his heart before he remembered that Hawkmoth - his father - was in prison. It had been years since they’d had an akuma attack, but that didn’t mean he didn’t still sometimes wake up in a cold sweat. 
Now that he was wide awake, Adrien started to remember. He and Marinette were getting married. It wouldn’t be too much longer before the big day finally came, which meant that he’d finally talked her into having her bachelorette party. Her plans were a quiet weekend out in Bordeaux. Just her, a few friends, and some wine in a rural village. He rolled out of bed and started to get dressed.
That had been a theme in most of the wedding planning - Adrien wanting to give her the world, and Marinette going instead for simple elegance. Well, she’d talked him down in most other parts of this wedding, but if there was one part before the honeymoon he intended to spoil her, then the bachelorette party was it. 
Adrien grinned as he remembered slipping Alya his credit card with only one instruction - go all out. How she would pull it off would be a mystery, but if her grin was anything to go by, then Adrien knew he had nothing to worry about.
As he brushed his teeth, he pulled out his phone to check his email. There at the very top of the inbox were three messages, two from his bride to be and one from Alya. Marinette’s were dated Saturday morning and Sunday afternoon, with Alya’s from early this morning. He’d already seen the first two, but decided to watch them again to get the whole experience.
After finishing up in the bathroom, he started the first video.
------------
The video started, although Adrien only knew this because Marinette’s voice came through clear. The screen itself was completely black. 
“Hey, sweetie! We just dropped our luggage off at the hotel and we’re heading to the winery right now!”
“Um, Marinette?” It took Adrien a moment to place Alix’s voice. He’d only seen her a couple times in the past year. “Your thumb is on the camera.”
“Wha- Oh!” The screen lit up, showing Marinette’s radiant smile and slightly flushed cheeks. Her hair had been tied back in a ponytail, with a pair of big, fashionable sunglasses resting just above her face. “Sorry about that, Adrien!” 
Some giggling drew both his and Marinette’s attention to the others in the car. The camera shakily panned over to them. 
“Say hi, girls!”
Alix, caught with one arm wrapped around the head rest, finger gunned at him. “Hi girls.”
“Hello Adrien!” Rose frantically waved and beamed at the camera. “I can’t wait to see you two walk down the aisle! Its going to be so romantic!” She wiggled in place, too full of excitement to stay still.
Finally the camera landed on Alya, who was driving.
“Hey, centerfold. Don’t worry, I’m taking care of M.” She glanced at the camera and winked. “We’ll have to talk to you later since we’re about there.”
The scene shook again as Marinette fumbled the camera. She managed to catch it and soon enough the camera was back on her face again.
“It’s been less than a day, but I’m missing you already!” The screen was engulfed by her lips when she gave it a quick kiss. “Bye!”
-------------------
Adrien smiled to himself and kissed the now black screen. 
Friday night must have gone as Marinette had planned then, but from the looks of it, Alya definitely hadn’t forgotten his request. She was more devious than the rest of them, if only because she was much more patient. First she would lull Marinette into a false sense of security… and only then would she spring the trap. 
Fully dressed and ready to meet the day, Adrien stretched out on the couch and opened the second video. This one was dated Sunday afternoon, the second day of their party. He sipped his coffee and pressed play. 
------------------
“Heyyy, sweetheart,” Marinette began, the words just barely slurred. A faint, constant blush tinted her cheek a pleasant rosy color. It was a little hard to hear her over the song playing on the radio and, more importantly, Alix and Rose loudly singing off key to it behind Marinette. 
Marinette either didn’t notice or was ignoring them, smiling into the camera all the while. “We just left the… winery. They had some great stuff there!” The view turned dark when she held something up a little too close to the camera. “I got a couple bottles to take home too!”
Someone said something, Adrien couldn’t hear what, and Marinette’s head whipped over to the side as she listened carefully. She nodded to herself before turning her attention back to the camera. 
“Alya says hi! Oh, and we’re going a little off the schedule here… We heard about a town nearby. They’ve got a few bars and one has a live band! This is basically just a girls’ night out, so it won’t be too wild… Right?”
The last question was directed more toward the other occupants of the car than Adrien himself. As far as he could tell, she didn’t get an answer. 
Marinette flashed him a sheepish smile and a slight shrug. “Well, anyway. I’ll send you another video when we get back to the hotel. Bye!”
------------------
Which just left the final video. The only one that he hadn’t watched through already. He’d been a little worried when Marinette hadn’t sent her video when she said she would, but he had bitten back that fear as best he could. After all, she always struggled with deadlines and who knew what they ended up doing that night.
Even so it was weird that Alya was the one to end it. What had kept Marinette from sending the video?
Only one way to find out - Adrien opened the message and played the recording.
---------------------
A wall of noise slammed into Adrien, which stunned him for a second before he could figure out what was going on. There was the babble of a drunk crowd that formed the undercurrent for the rock band playing on stage. 
Adrien only had a second to wonder who was recording when he heard Alya’s voice close to the microphone.
“Watch this, blondie.”
It was at that moment that he found her - even between the low light and the jostle of the crowd, he could spot her anywhere. Then again, it wouldn’t be too hard to spot anyone if they were climbing up onto the stage with the band. Adrien watching with shock as she stepped up to the empty mic stand, swayed ever so slightly, and leaned in close. 
“I’m getting MARRIED!”
The crowd went wild, applause and shouting drowning out the music for a moment. 
“To the best man, the greatest partner in the whole world!”
Another round of cheers, combined with some ‘aw’s thrown in. 
One of the band members stepped up and gently took the mic from her. Thankfully, he seemed more amused than angry - Adrien could just barely make out an amused smirk from his perspective. 
“Then this one’s for you-”
“Marinette!” Alya shouted.
“-Marinette, and to your lucky man. Hit it, boys!”
Adrien wasn’t sure what the difference was between this song and the last, especially since he couldn’t hear it too well thanks to Alya being in the middle of a wild crowd, but Marinette definitely seemed to like it since she started dancing on the stage. 
The scene went black for a second before turning back on to Alya’s grinning face. She gave him a thumbs up. 
“Mission accomplished, centerfold!” She leaned in conspiratorially. “Better be careful when M gets home, though!”
She winked and the video ended. 
-------------------------------
In the silence, the sound of the door opening immediately caught his attention. Before he could get up off the couch, Marinette stepped into the room. She glared daggers at him, but he relaxed when he saw the corners of her mouth twitch, as if she was fighting down a smile. 
“So,” he said. “How was your quiet weekend out?”
Marinette sat down on him hard enough to knock some of the wind out of him. She crossed her arms and quirked an eyebrow at him.
“Did you know that Alya was the one who hired that band, or were you just bankrolling it?”
“Whaaat? I would never-” He put his hand on his chest in mock outrage. “I mean, what about the budget?!”
“You’re an awful liar, chaton. Three margaritas in and she spilled the beans. I may have been drunk too, but I don’t forget easily.” She tapped her chin and looked up at the ceiling in thought. “Hm... where will I have to pull the money from to balance it out… Maybe the cake?”
“Hey now, our guests have to have cake!”
“You’re right.” She crossed her arms. “The flowers then.”
“You booked Francois a month ago, my love. No way you’re going to be getting the deposit back on that one.”
“Good point.” Her eyes widened and she clapped her hands together. “Oh, I know! I haven’t gone lingerie shopping for the honeymoon yet!”
“...Wait, let’s not be hasty.”
“Well, it can’t be helped.” She sighed melodramatically and pulled out her phone. “I was going to go to this really upscale shop and spend quite a bit but since we blew so much of the budget, I'll just call Alya and cancel but- hey!"
Adrien had snatched her phone and turtled up as best he could. As they wrestled for it, they devolved into a mess of giggles. Somehow, they ended up on the floor, Adrien propped up on his elbows above her.
Marinette crossed her arms, her hair a halo behind her head. She shrugged and rolled her eyes with a smirk.
“I suppose I can let you spoil me just this once.” She tapped his nose. “But don’t get used to it.”
“We’ll see about that,” he replied with a kiss on her forehead. 
29 notes · View notes
solomonish · 4 years
Text
longtime listener (solomon x reader)
“Hi, uh, I’m a longtime listener, first time caller. Is it just me, or are we two halves of the same soul?”
It felt like the late night talk show was made for you specifically….and you know what? Maybe it was.
ao3 link: here!
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3 a.m. It was 3 a.m. in this nowhere town of yours, the summer crickets screaming loud enough to become a steady thrum in the back of your mind. This insomniac routine had gone on long enough that your bedroom light was not off. You had gone past the empty attempts at counting sheep, spent countless hours relaxing your muscles from head to toe, everything. The orange bottle of melatonin mocked you each time you opened your medicine cabinet, half-full of pills that didn’t do a damn thing for you. Now, surrounded entirely by trees and the sounds of nature keeping you company, you had taken to merely entertaining yourself in the hours of the night when you should be asleep.
If idle hands bored you in the daylight, it was even worse at night. The cover of darkness seemed to bring with it a blanket over your mind, insulating your thoughts with slowly creeping dread and loneliness the longer you allowed yourself to stew. Scattered across your house were projects in varying degrees of completion: a crochet granny square half-completed, a needle still stuck in a loop lying on the small table beside your couch. Sad as it is, it is still better off than the elephant who’s box was opened and instructions spread out, but too indecipherable to a novice like you. On your desk lay scattered coloring book pages and paint-by-numbers, even an adhesive jewel coloring activity that was far too expensive for the one page, delivered by a man who’s baseball hat brim never revealed his face. It was the first unfamiliar face you had seen in a while, even though you technically hadn’t seen it at all.
A small stack of books that you tried to read stared at you from your dresser, begging you to open them again as if the words wouldn’t blur together immediately. Beside them sat your radio, an old thing that you hadn’t touched in years before your sleepless nights came to plague you. Most of the time, static veiled the music that you expected to be playing, even though you could catch slivers of familiar lyrics between the fuzzy noises. The only station you could seem to get was a talk show.
Unlike other radio shows you had heard, this one was uninterrupted by music or, like the other stations, static. There were no guests either, as all you ever heard was one voice. It was a calm voice with a playful lilt, neither too deep nor too high. To you, it was the kind of voice that seemed to pull you in a trance, as if it knew exactly which senses to numb until you were pliable to the way the sound crashed into you. If you hadn’t been having these sleepless bouts, you could probably fall asleep to his voice.
The topic of the show was lost on you. Sometimes, if you listened real close, you could hear the man talk about old urban legends or strange, magical creatures. Other times, he was murmuring about spells and recommending potion recipes. More often than not, though, you spent your time in a stupor, not listening to the yarns he was spinning. Instead, it was as if his voice pulled your spirit out of your body and led you down a path of memories lost to time.
Such an idea seemed scary, but...it was comforting, honestly, and maybe the little bit of rest you needed to prevent your body from crashing throughout the day.
With the voice in the backdrop, you found yourself going on wild adventures you felt like you lived but could not actually remember. Sometimes, you found yourself on the edge of a rocky outcrop on the coast, stormy clouds above warning you to turn away from the ocean as the ebb of the tide beckoned you closer. You could feel the salt in the wind brushing against your mist-soaked cheeks, your hair limp and wet but still blowing wildly around you. Others, you could feel the thick moss sink under your weight as you traipsed through a nameless bog, searching for a vivid, unnaturally colored mushroom you knew you had seen before but could not name. You could even see, on occasion, a dark land lit by multi-colored lanterns, a decrepit manor filled with seven rambunctious figures you thought you remembered fondly.
Then, just before the sun started to peer above the horizon, you were brought back to your body and the voice signed off, almost affectionately. The room around you, bathed in the light purple of an early dawn, almost seemed to shimmer until the sun broke the spell.
It was baffling, but you couldn’t exactly share the experience with anyone without them thinking that you were crazy. Besides, it all seemed too intimate to share, and the selfish part of you thought it’d be best to keep these moments tucked away.
As you settled in the swivel chair with the radio static in the background, aimlessly fiddling with the threads on your old shirt, you began to feel nerves bundling in your stomach. Though you couldn’t quite explain why, it seemed as if something was about to change. You eyed the radio nervously, listening to the static that would soon give way to the voice.
After a few more nerve-wracking moments, the static subsided and the relaxing, smooth voice started to poke through. There was no introduction music and he was starting to come through mid-sentence, but you already leaned back, convinced that whatever he was saying was true. The two of you were on the same wavelength, after all.
He droned on for longer than you remembered him taking, and you remain - frustratingly enough - with your body and painfully aware of the world around you. You can actually hear what he’s talking about - something about coincidences, fate, reincarnation - the stuff of a pre-teen branching into philosophical thought. You can feel your interest waning, and you even debate turning the channel and slipping back into your old attempts at falling asleep when he says something of interest.
“...and if it’s alright with you, I’ll open the line for any callers. I’ll wait for you. Whenever you’re ready.”
You froze. What? That wasn’t how this type of show was supposed to go. You had never heard him even speak about anybody else specifically, let along open up his world to anybody who was listening. The thought scared you in a weird way, the kind of fear that you were sure should only be felt in prehistoric times, an almost primal fear of invasion.
Reaching beside you, you grabbed your phone and dialed. You didn’t remember him saying the number to call, but you already knew it. You must have, because before you know it, you’re bringing the phone up to your ear.
For just a moment, as the phone in your ear rings but nothing changes on the radio.Like a child whose schoolyard crush just rejected them, you feel like a fool - until you hear a click, and the voice that greets you matches the one you’ve been listening to for endless nights.
Your voice doesn’t come through on the radio, a fact that both relieves and confuses you. Faintly, you can tell that your heart rate has picked up and your breathing has gotten shallower. The nerves from a few minutes ago pick up again. Gracelessly, you manage to stammer out a nervous, “H-hi…” while your brain catches up with the rest of your body.
“Hello, MC,” he responds, his smooth voice erasing all the bumps in your own introduction. You wonder how he knows your name, but decide to focus on how nice it sounds on his tongue. “What is it that you wish to learn tonight?”
That you’re talking to me. Me, and only me, is what your brain wants to say. Istead, your eyes dart around the room for a less...needy response. “I, uh- gosh, this is embarrassing, but I don’t think I caught your name.”
He hummed. You couldn’t tell if you were hearing his voice over the radio or the phone, but you could only hear him once - the rest of the world had been turned down to silence. “Perhaps you haven’t, in this life.”
In this life. For a moment, you swore you could see a familiar smirk in the darkest corner of your mind, one slim finger pressed against sly lips in a gesture to keep your secrets to yourself. Your face felt warmer than it had ever been, but your chest felt hollow, like you were grasping vaguely for something just out of reach.
“I didn’t mean to forget, Solomon.” The name felt right leaving your mouth, and now that you had said it, you wanted to repeat it over and over. On the other end of the line, Solomon seemed as pleased as you did.
“As long as you remember now.”
Honestly, what were you to say to that? Simply talking, really talking to Solomon had your breath robbed from your lungs. If you looked down, you could see your hands shaking, and you worried your voice might start trembling if you spoke too soon. The longer you let the silence linger, the colder you felt inside, an empty chill filling the space where something you briefly realized was torn from you should be. Whatever it was, talking to Solomon thawed you out, and you feared hanging up on him now would freeze you solid.
So you swallowed thickly and hesitantly spoke. “Do you ever dream about the ocean, Solomon?” You just wanted to say his name again.
“Who says those are dreams? Maybe they’re memories.” And surely he was right, because there was no way a simple dream could leave such a potent taste of salt in your mouth.
The way he spoke to you felt so familiar, almost safe and welcoming. Even if your conversation was only just beginning, you had the distinct sensation that you were picking up where you left off with an old companion, falling into an easy rhythm you used to find solace in. At the same time, you couldn’t shake the fact that you knew nothing about Solomon, and that this phone call was telling you that tonight was his last broadcast.
“Do you have memories of the ocean?” Your voice was breathy, and you had to catch yourself just before reciting his name a third time. What was your fascination with it? Perhaps you were trying to call out to him, to keep his attention on you. Maybe you were hoping to summon him back to you. You supposed it didn’t matter in the end, anyway.
“Yes. Not all of them are fond, though. Some parts are.”
You could practically see the way his mouth turned down at the corners, a practiced display of displeasure. He always managed to express himself without giving away too much information - he was the type of person where you knew he was upset, but you could never begin to fathom why. That’s what everyone else thought, but you were the exception. You could watch his face fall and know what he was thinking. You would be the one to lift his spirits again, once upon a time. That, you remembered. Could you ever forget?
The silence that stretched between you didn’t feel like something that needed filled. It was a language all its own, a space where you could hear the other speak without anything being said. This, you realized, is what it felt like to be so perfectly in tune with someone, to understand them completely, better than you knew yourself.
But how could you know Solomon so intimately when this was your first time speaking to him?
No...no, it wasn’t. You’ve known Solomon for longer than you’ve been alive.
“Which memories are fond?”
He didn’t answer the question. He didn’t need to. He was thinking of you in lifetimes you just learned had already come to pass.
“Are you still on air?” You asked, your voice soft and uneven. As if awaiting horrible, surprising news, you brought your free hand to your mouth and bated your breath. The world around you had come to a standstill as you awaited his answer - even turning yourself mindlessly in your chair seemed wrong, but you couldn’t force yourself to reach out with your foot and stop.
The chuckle you received was rich, velvety, and it sounded much closer and clearer than a man talking to you through a phone. “Who’s to say I was ever on air to begin with?”
Your face warmed, and you gasped. Despite the ominous words, something in your chest told you that you could trust him, that this was meant to be. All at once, the sounds of the world came back to you. The crickets were chirping, the katydids screaming, frogs calling out to one another in their summer song. From a distance away, a sudden low rumble sounded as something made impact with the ground, sending a light shockwave that shook the old branches above you and sent exhilarating chills down your spine. A shocking cloud of purple light, glimmering like all the stars in the galaxy came down to visit you, caught your attention through your window. You should be scared. You really should be, but you weren’t. You felt like the late-night bus just arrived to take you home.
Once you were out of your trance, you brought the phone back to your ear. The line had been quiet since you started asking your questions, but you could tell Solomon was still there. You didn’t need to tell him that you were back - he already knew.
“Why…?” You had no idea what you were asking about, but you did so with a hint of anticipation in your voice. This was the moment you had been waiting for all your life, but you only just realized you’d been waiting. His answer made your heart flip the way it used to.
“I was merely looking for you, my love.”
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Text
COSMIC - S3:E4; Chapter Four, The Sauna Test - [Pt. 3]
A Will Byers x Reader Series
𝘔𝘪𝘬𝘦, 𝘓𝘶𝘤𝘢𝘴, 𝘢𝘯𝘥 𝘞𝘪𝘭𝘭 𝘳𝘦𝘤𝘳𝘶𝘪𝘵 𝘌𝘭, 𝘔𝘢𝘹 𝘢𝘯𝘥 𝘠/𝘯 𝘵𝘰 𝘩𝘦𝘭𝘱 𝘵𝘩𝘦𝘮 𝘭𝘦𝘢𝘳𝘯 𝘸𝘩𝘰 𝘵𝘩𝘦 𝘔𝘪𝘯𝘥 𝘍𝘭𝘢𝘺𝘦𝘳'𝘴 𝘩𝘰𝘴𝘵 𝘪𝘴 𝘸𝘩𝘪𝘭𝘦 𝘙𝘰𝘣𝘪𝘯, 𝘚𝘵𝘦𝘷𝘦, 𝘢𝘯𝘥 𝘋𝘶𝘴𝘵𝘪𝘯 𝘳𝘦𝘤𝘳𝘶𝘪𝘵 𝘴𝘰𝘮𝘦𝘰𝘯𝘦 𝘵𝘰 𝘴𝘯𝘦𝘢𝘬 𝘪𝘯𝘵𝘰 𝘓𝘺𝘯𝘹.
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📝: ERICAAA!!! FRICKIN FINALLY!! Less important note, but when writing about Y/n, El and Max, I wrote "the three friends" and autocorrect literally changed "friends" to "fruits". Yelmax confirmed 💀
||𝟑𝐑𝐃 𝐏𝐄𝐑𝐒𝐎𝐍 𝐏𝐎𝐕||
"It is fascinating what twenty bucks will get you at the County Recorder's Office," Robin reports, unfurling what looked to be a familiar layout on the break room table. "Starcourt Mall. The complete blueprints."
"Not bad," Dustin smirks from her left.
"So this is us," she points to a familiar-looking room before gesturing across the map. "Scoops, and this is where we wanna get."
"Yeah, I don't really see a way in," Steve mumbles from his seat at the table.
"There's not. If,"
She rips away a layer of the blueprint, revealing a vastly complicated map of air ducts, pipelines, and detailing that made up Starcourt.
"you're talking exclusively about doors."
Dustin looks at her with excitement growing in his eyes. "Air ducts!"
"Exactly," she smirks, making her way to the whiteboard to retrieve the magic marker. "Turns out, this secret room needs air just like any old room and these air ducts lead all the way" she circles the secret room in question, drawing one, interrupted line right back to, "here."
Dustin and Steve finally tear their eyes away from the map and follow Robin's mischievous eye. All the way to the air duct tucked away in the far corner of the Scoops Ahoy break room.
⊹ ⊹ ⊹
To their surprise, a screwdriver had been harder to find than a ladder but soon enough Steve had managed to reach the air vent and unscrew it from the wall. But as he stood here now, peering down into the vent he quickly realized they were now facing yet another obstacle.
"Flath'ligh'?" Steve asked, finally removing the screwdriver from his mouth and shaping it for the small torchlight Dustin had waiting. "Thank you,"
The flashlight turns on with a tiny click and a soft yellow light bounces down the narrow metal tunnel, enunciation the frown on Steve's face.
"Yeah, I don't know man, I don't know if you can fit in here, it's like... super tight."
"I'll fit," Dustin smirks. "Trust me. No collarbones, remember?"
"Uh, excuse me?" Robin asks.
Steve jumps down from the ladder, turning to Robin as Dustin begins the climb and gives her a nod.
"Oh, he's uh, he's got so disease," he frowns thoughtfully, racking his brain as he tries to recall the word. "It's chrydo... um... something, yeah I don't know. He's missing bones and stuff, he can bend like Gumbo."
"You mean... Gumby?"
"I'm pretty sure it's Gumbo," he snorts.
"Just shut up and push me!" Comes Dustin's muffled voice from the vents.
By now he had wormed himself halfway in, his bottom half sticking out of the wall and still propped up on the latter while they had been talking.
"Okay,"  Steve huffed, motioning knowingly to the kid's feet and turned away from Robin.
She watched with a tired, lazily bemused expression as Steve grabbed a less than sturdy hold of the kid's feet and attempted to push.
"Not my feet, dumbass, push my ass!"
"Uh, what?"
"TOUCH MY BUTT! I DON'T CARE!" Came Dustin's impatient scream from the walls.
With a heavy grimace, Steve hesitantly began pushing against Dustin's rear end and his muffled anger grew louder.
"I'm pushing!" Steve argued.
"PUSH HARDER!" Dustin shrieks as he attempts to inch further into the metal vents. "You're playing with my legs!"
"I'm not playing, I have terrible footing!"
"Come on!"
Steve finally makes it to the top of the latter, Dustin's legs bunched together over his shoulders and locked under his arm as their voice continued to shout over one another.
"I'm gonna just shove you, ready?"
"Just shove me?"
"One, two..."
"Shit!"
"That work?"
"One more time,"
Robin rolls her eyes, finally turning away when she hears the sudden rapid chimes of the customer bell out front and all too familiar patron.
"Ahoy, sailors! All hands on deck!"
Through the partition window, Robin meets eyes with none other than Erica Sinclair who flashes her an exaggerated salute and rings the bell knowingly.
⊹ ⊹ ⊹
Laughter and joyful screams filled the chlorine-soaked air, the smell of the pool lingering with sunblock was strong enough it wafted all the way to the parking lot where the majority of the Party now stood at the Hawkins pool. It looked quite different than it had the day before when Y/n, Max, and El had last been, but the tension weighing down the atmosphere seemed just as heavy and ever-present.
The storm had of course long since lifted, and the sun was now beating down heavily on their backs as they took shelter behind a Rust Red AMC Hornet, all eyes across the lot on the occupant in the lifeguard chair.
Billy.
He was squished underneath the bright red beach umbrella, hidden underneath a baseball cap, thick shades, a long-sleeved sweater, and a white beach towel draped over his legs where they poked out into the sun. He was completely covered.
"I don't know," Max begins, peering through the group's binoculars. "He looks pretty normal to me,"
"Normal?" Lucas scoffs. "How many times have you seen him with a shirt on?"
Y/n smiles weakly from where she stands in between him and Will. Max lowers the binoculars, conceding a wince.
"I mean, it's a little weird,"
"More than a little," Mike nods. "He was in a tub with ice. The Mind Flayer likes it cold. Plus everything El saw—"
"But he's lounging at the pool," Max argues, doubtfully. "Which is like, the least Mind Flayer thing ever,"
"Not necessarily," Will says, pulling everyone's attention. "The Mind Flayer likes to hide. He only used me when he needed me. It's like... like you're dormant. And then, when he needs you,"
All eyes return to Billy.
"...you're activated."
Y/n gulps, shifting on her feet from where she had previously stood rooted to the spot. Ever since that dreaded Halloween night the previous year, nothing seemed to have been the same. The Mind Flayer had set his sights on Will, and in turn, her. Slowly but surely, he had infected all of their lives as he had the town of Hawkins; spreading his rot and poison, and his hate. She could still feel it sometimes; the pain of Will's nails raking into her face and leaving behind the faded scar that had already long since disappeared.
Her eyes dart back through the fence at the suspicious-looking lifeguard and her insides twisted further into a sickening knot. The thought of the Mind Flayer's possible return was enough to drain the color from her face and leave a chill in the humid, sticky summer air. Her mind was running rapid with fear but the sound of Max's voice was enough to return her to earth.
"Okay, so we just..." she shrugs, looking back over towards her brother. "wait until he gets activated."
"No," Mike says with the shake of his head. "What if he hurts someone?"
"Or kills someone?" Will counters, and the Wheeler boy nods.
"We can't take that chance. We need to find out if he's the host,"
"Well, how do we do that?" Lucas asks.
The Party falls silent. The weight of the air growing heavier and heavier as it dawns on them. And one by one, each pair of eyes trickle over to the only present Henderson sibling in the Party. Her head is hung, propped-up against the hood and when she senses the eyes on her she straightens, breathing a sigh. But Will was already shaking his head.
"What? No, no way," he says to Mike and the others, Y/n already turning to him. "No, Y/n, I don't think it's a good idea,"
"I don't like it either," Y/n fretted. "but it's our best chance. The Mind Flayer hates me, and I can push his limits. It's the fastest way."
"And if, by some random chance, Billy isn't the host?" Will countered gently. "He'd find out about you,"
Y/n didn't have a reply for that. Truthfully, she didn't know whether to be relieved or angered he had cornered her. She just stood there, frowning at the concrete sidewalk biting her lip thoughtfully. She tried to think of a way to use her abilities subtly, but all her experience with heat came from seismic blasts or concentrated bursts from her hands. If she attempted that on Billy, he would surely know it.
"There's gotta be another way," Mike cuts in. "I mean, a safe way that doesn't risk you getting hurt or discovered."
Y/n and Will - even El - shoot him a funny look and he shifts under the sudden attention, guiltily.
"What about the sauna?" Lucas says, lighting up.
"Huh?"
"Yeah, it's perfect!" He grins, stepping out from around the car and motioning for Will and Mike. "Come on,"
Seemingly catching onto Lucas's idea, Mike wastes no time in following. And Will hesitantly steps away, sending Y/n and his friends an apologetic shrug.
"Where are you going?" El called after them, exasperated.
"Sorry! Boys only!" Mike throws over his shoulder.
Max scowls after them. "Seriously?!"
"Just trust us!" Lucas cries.
"We'll be back," Will shrugs again. "... I guess."
The three friends sigh, throwing less than impressed looks at the retreating boys. Privately, Y/n wondered if Mike stood any chance of harm just from her glaring at him in this moment. She hadn't shared these feelings with anyone, but since reuniting with Will something had been troubled Ling him and he wouldn't say what. She could spot it right away, the shift in demeanor but she knew it was something different from the return of the Mind Flayer somehow. And she believed it had something to do with Mike.
He was acting differently around him. He had been for some time now, as she had with Max and even El but this was different. Something had happened, and because Will was, well, Will, he was clearly trying to put aside for the sake of everyone's safety. Y/n couldn't really blame him there, but she wished he would open up to her. Tell her what was wrong.
And she wished more than anything she could fix whatever Mike had clearly broken.
⊹ ⊹ ⊹
"All we gotta do is wait until the pool closes and everyone leaves," Lucas begins, guiding his friends through the first layer of the men's locker rooms. "And then get him from here..."
He steps forward, quickly ripping open the secondary door. The three boys scurry inside, and Lucas's friends quickly seem to catch on to his plan and a small smile grows on Will's face.
"And get him into here," Lucas eagerly rips open the sauna door, expecting to see nothing but steam but his luck had run out.
Five sweaty adult men in towels sat packed in the sauna like sardines, scowls on their faces for the three party members who interrupted their steam. "Hey! Shut the door!"
-"Come on, kid!"
-"Shut it!"
Lucas finally broke from his stupor and slammed the door shut, shuddering.
"I think I just threw up in my mouth,"
Will nodded with a grimace, but shook it off when his eyes landed on the wall beside the door.
"The controls!"
Mike's still bulging, haunted eyes finally broke away from their zoning out and jumped to the wall where Will was pointing. His face lit up.
"We can control from the outside, it's perfect!"
"Do you think it'll get hot enough?" Will asks, feeling more and more relieved by the second. "Like, "Y/n" hot?"
His friends immediately stopped, looking to him with a deadpan expression. Will scoffed at them. "You know what I mean" he snarked, not in the mood though he was trying to ignore the hint of a blush creeping up on his skin.
"Nevermind that," Lucas says. "Look right, here, 220 degrees. That's definitely enough."
"Okay, so we just need to figure out how to get him into here," Will nods towards the sauna door.
"Precisely."
"Then we lock him in," Mike says.
Lucas nods. "-heat him up,"
And Will manages another somewhat relieved smile. "-and no matter what happens, we'll know for sure."
⊹ ⊹ ⊹
Erica descends from the latter, the flashlight in her hands flicking off with a loud click as she strides up to the break room table where her recruits stood waiting. The group had taken a calculated risk I confiding in the young girl, but she was smart and demanded the information and why they needed to know if she could fit into the air duct in the back room. So here they stood, waiting with anxious breath for her verdict.
"Yeah, I don't know," she says, propping herself up on the edge of the table rather unimpressed.
"You don't know if you can fit?" Dustin asks.
"Oh, I can fit. I just don't know if I want to,"
"Are you claustrophobic?" Robin tries.
Amused, Erica gives the young woman a pitiful laugh. "I don't have phobias."
"Okay, well," Steve begins with a shrug. "What's the problem?"
"The problem is I still haven't heard what's in this for Erica,"
⊹ ⊹ ⊹
Steve slides another banana boat ice cream float across the table, joining the already plentiful dairy banquet laid out for the Sinclair girl. She merely gave it a single, disinterested glance and slid it back.
"More fudge please,"
Nobody said anything. And Steve just stared back at the table with tired, glazed-over eyes before Erica sent him a dismissive wave.
"Go on,"
He gave a sigh, and left the booth with the Banana boat in hand, and retreated to the counter. Robin took that as her cue and pulled out the marked-up blueprints she had at her side.
"Alright, you see this?" She points from the circle marked Scoops Ahoy and trail connecting over the flipped map. "This is the route you're gonna take. Then we just wait until the last delivery goes out tonight then you knock out the grate. Jump down. Open the door."
"Then you find out what's in those boxes?" She asks.
"Exactly,"
"And you say this guard is armed?"
"Yes," Dustin quickly nods. "But he won't be there,"
"And booby traps?"
"Booby traps?" Robin echoed.
"Lazers, spikes in the wall,"
Robin couldn't help but give a small laugh, but Erica was all too serious. She turned to the two with a serious look.
"You know what this half-baked plan of yours sounds like to me? Child endangerment."
"We'll be in radio contact with you the whole time-"
"Uh! Uh! Uh!" Erica stops her. "Child. Endangerment."
Robin sighs, ignoring the knot wanting to twist in her stomach. She knew she was right, and Robin supposed she just didn't want to admit to herself what they were asking not only of themselves but the young girl.
"Erica?" Dustin began. "Hi, uh... We think these Russians want to do harm to our country. Great harm. Don't you love your country?"
"You can't spell America without Erica," she shrugs, taking a long and loud sip from her complimentary Scoops Shake.
Dustin just blinks at her response and concedes with a nod. "Uh... yeah. Oddly, that's uh... weirdly true, so... so! Don't do this for us! Do it for your country. Do it for your fellow man. Do this for America, Erica."
Erica, who had been slurping her drink through her straw throughout his entire speech, finally finished it off and shivered, sending him a smirk. "Ooh! I just got the chills."
Dustin smiled proudly.
"Oh, yeah," she quickly corrects, her smile falling. "From this float. Not your speech."
His smile falls right off his face.
"You know what I love most about this country?" Erica began. "Capitalism. Do you know what capitalism is?"
Both Robin and Dustin mumble a 'yeah'.
"It means this is a free market system, which means people get paid for their services depending on how valuable their contributions are. And this seems to me that my ability to fit into that little vent is very, very valuable to you all. So-"
Robin and Dustin share a worried look.
"-you want my help? This U.S.S. Butterscotch better be the first of many. And I'm talking free ice cream for life,"
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pretchatta · 3 years
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swoon june day 16: heartbeat
[insp]
rating: mature (lap dancing, blood/injury); kanan jarrus/hera syndulla; 2.7k words
---
Hera’s heartbeat thuds in her ears as she enters the private club. All around her she’s aware of richly-dressed patrons sitting around tables being attended to by a variety of beings. She holds her head high in her best imitation of self-importance. Even though women of her species are usually expected to be in a different role in establishments such as these, she has learned that projecting confidence goes a long way towards convincing people that she belongs to nobody.
It doesn’t help her fear that comes from being here in the first place.
The club is warm, enough for her to remove the cloak around her shoulders. Underneath she’s wearing a cowl-neck dress that falls to her ankles, the fine material a deep purple colour. It hugs her figure while leaving her arms bare, and a matching cap covers her head and the base of her lekku. Her heart beats harder with a new fear now, the fear of being seen, of being reduced to her body and her species and nothing else. It’s an old fear, one she can control.
She finds an empty booth in a shadowy corner. Ignoring the way her shoes stick to the black floor, she sits on the circular padded bench that runs around the circumference of the small space. The red material is imitation velvoid – or, at least, she assumes it’s imitation in a place like this. The light is dim enough that she can’t tell. Soft music with a steady beat comes from hidden speakers, and she can feel the bass through the seat.
A zabrak server in dark robes arrives to take her drink order, and to ask if there’s anything else they can get for her. She knows exactly what they mean.
“A human male,” she says, in the same tone she ordered the drink. “Preferably tall, with long hair.”
“I’ll see who’s in for you tonight, Mistress.” The server gives a small bow before leaving.
Hera knows exactly who is in tonight. When Fulcrum had offered her this job, they had made it clear she didn’t have to take it. When she took it anyway, fully expecting that she would be the one to infiltrate the club that was actually a front for zygerrian slavers, she had been surprised when Kanan had insisted he go instead. Surprised, and touched. He’d been on her crew barely six months and still hadn’t shown much interest in her rebellion work, but the moment she’d briefed him on this job he’d been adamant that he would be the one in the field. They were fortunate the zygerrians trafficked in humans.
His target was data: a list of the trackers the zygerrians had implanted in their slaves and the frequencies they operated on. Without it, extraction would be impossible. If the zygerrians couldn’t recapture their prisoners they would simply remotely activate the explosives contained in the trackers, and any rescue would have been for nothing. Kanan would get the data, Hera would transmit it to Fulcrum, and then the rescue would be staged by the small team of bounty hunters Fulcrum had hired to ensure total success on this job.
All Hera had to do was meet Kanan and get the list.
Knowing that he’s the only human here doesn’t stop the relief she feels when he finally appears. It’s been four days of waiting, four days of alternating between worrying about him and feeling guilty and selfish for sending him instead of her. For a moment, the sight of him whole and healthy and unharmed calms her. Then she takes in his appearance and her heartbeat speeds right back up.
Kanan’s loose pants hang low off his hips. The dark material drapes down his legs, the lines of light and shadow shifting when he moves. In contrast, his armless green shirt is skintight, doing little to hide the lines of hard, lean muscles on his chest. He still has the same goatee as before but his hair is different – about half has been pulled up into a topknot and the rest hangs loose about his shoulders. His eyes, smudged with a touch of black eyeliner, immediately fix her with a smouldering gaze.
Hera’s cheeks flush with heat. She’s been so wrapped up in worrying about his well-being that, until now, she hasn’t spared a thought for the service she is posing as a customer for. She still hasn’t sorted out the mess that is her feelings for him, and it dawns on her that they might be about to get a whole lot messier.
He leans against the entrance to her booth with a casual grace.
“Do I meet your requirements for tonight, Mistress?”
His voice is low and husky and goes straight between her legs.
She swallows and tries to keep her voice steady as she replies.
“You’ll do.”
He gives her a small smirk as he pushes off the wall and slinks inside. The music grows louder, coalescing into a thrumming song with a heavy beat. He stops in front of her and smoothly takes her hand, bringing it to his mouth to brush his lips along the back of it.
Her breath catches in the back of her throat. She doesn’t know if he’s joking or if they’re being watched, but she follows his lead and keeps up the act in case it’s the latter.
He slides onto the bench beside her in time with the music, still with her hand near his face and his darkened eyes locked on hers. He brushes his nose against the back of her hand and then continues down her arm in a line, over her wrist and elbow all the way to her shoulder. From there he turns his head so that his lips are barely an inch from her earcone.
“They have cameras everywhere,” he whispers. “We’re both new, they’ll be watching us. Just play along.”
Hera gives him the smallest of nods to show she understands.
Kanan’s next moves flow with the beat of the music so well that she can’t help but wonder if there’s more than just four days of experience behind them. He twists so that he’s on one knee, and then swings his other knee over her lap, straddling her. His body undulates over hers, keeping time with the thrumming bass. She notices he’s very careful not to make contact with her, except for where the material of his pants drapes over her lap.
He lowers himself so that he’s almost sitting on her legs and drops his head, his mouth now next to her other earcone.
“In about two minutes there’s going to be an evacuation. Get out, transmit the data, then meet me round the back with a speeder bike.”
Hera hopes his shoulder hides her mouth from any cameras as she breathes, “Where’s the list?”
Kanan turns his head so that his sly smile hovers just above her mouth. “I’m about to give it to you.”
Heat flares in her body in response. His hands cup her face and tilt her head back. She feels his nose brush her throat, and then his hands are running down to her shoulders, along her arms. His nose reaches the dip between her collarbones.
“They gave me a tracker,” he murmurs, his breath tickling her breastbone, “but I couldn’t get the frequency. That’s why I need an alternate extraction.”
In one smooth movement he’s standing in front of her again, holding her gaze with his eyes. He runs one hand down his chest, then takes the hem of his shirt and slowly lifts it. The hard lines of his tensed abdominal muscles had already been visible, but now she can see his flushed skin and its sparse coating of hair. It’s enough to distract her from the question she was about to ask.
Kanan draws his shirt up further, to his chin, at which point he takes the material between his teeth. Then he steps back towards her. He takes one of her hands and presses it against the highest point of his exposed skin, his breastbone, just under the triangle made by the hem of his shirt. With her palm flat against his hot skin she can feel his heart beating almost as hard as her own.
He then moves her hand down and slightly away, grazing the tips of her fingers down his abs in a line. Hera’s barely breathing. Even if maintaining his cover hadn’t been imperative, she wouldn’t have been able or willing to stop now. But continuing their act was important – they were so close now, the last thing they needed was for the zygerrians watching them to get suspicious.
When her hand reaches the top of his pants he cants his hips so her hand is once again pressed flat against him, and she feels something hard pressing into her palm. She hooks her fingers inside his waistband to retrieve the small datachip tucked into it and doesn’t know whether to be grateful or disappointed that it was off-centre.
He lets her hand fall to her lap. Hera draws it up to her face, her thumb tucking the datachip against her palm. Her cheeks are flushed with heat but she holds his gaze as she flicks out her tongue and slowly drags the length of her hand over it, licking off his sweat. Something flickers in his kohl-smeared eyes as she does. When she’s done, her hand is on her chest and she can tuck the datachip into the cowl of her dress.
Kanan blinks and comes back to himself, dropping to his knees in front of her, in time with the music once again. He places his hands on her legs so that his fingers splay over her thighs, their warmth penetrating through the material of her dress. Then he starts to slowly stroke up, towards her hips. He bends his head to follow, his nose brushing along her inner thigh. Hera feels like her heart might explode, blood pounding hot in her ears.
Without warning, the music cuts out. A moment later an alarm starts blaring. Kanan is immediately on his feet, tugging his shirt back down and offering Hera a hand.
“Evacuation alarm, Mistress,” he says loudly and calmly over the noise. Hera takes a shaky breath and allows him to lead her out of the booth. Her heart feels like it’s trying to beat its way out of her chest, and she doesn’t realise she’s forgotten her cloak until Kanan settles it around her shoulders. She turns to thank him, but they’re back in the main area and his face is set in an expressionless mask.
Hera lets herself be ushered back to the entrance she came through by the servers as Kanan disappears through a curtain into the back. In the noise and confusion it’s easy for her to duck away into a side street and away from the congregating patrons, who range from bewildered to outraged that their night is being interrupted.
The cool night air is soothing against her flushed skin. She takes several deep breaths as she walks back to the place she stashed her speeder bike, doing her best to calm herself. Attached to the bike is the short-range transmitter she installed and she uses it now to send the bounty hunters the frequency data. They should be on standby, ready to go as soon as she gives the word, which means the extraction begins now.
She hops on the bike and revs the engine. Kanan’s extraction begins now, too. She never did ask him how he was intending to disable his tracker, and she squashes the sudden fear that he doesn’t actually have a plan for that yet. Or, at least, she tries to; her hands shake on the handlebars as her heart once again starts pounding.
The back entrance isn’t hard to find, because it’s where the bounty hunters’ ship is hovering. She tears around the corner in time to hear Kanan’s voice.
“...go, I’ve got my own way out!”
She doesn’t see who he was talking to, as they are presumably taken up to the ship. It starts to rise as she brakes, calling out to Kanan.
He appears a moment later.
“Go,” he shouts, leaping onto the bike behind her. Three zygerrians follow him out, whips and crossbows in their hands. She steps on the accelerator as Kanan’s arms encircle her waist from behind.
Several shots sail over their heads as Hera urges the bike down the narrow streets. Driving isn’t quite the same as flying, but the thrill is close enough. She takes several sharp turns to throw off any pursuit, and is about to map out a route back to the Phantom when Kanan speaks into her earcone.
“Pull over, they’ll be tracking me.”
She’d almost forgotten. She finds an empty alley to back the bike into and takes them into the cover of the shadows before turning to him.
“You do have a plan to get it out, don’t you?” She doesn’t know if she’ll be more scared or angry if his answer is no.
“Yeah, but it’s going to be messy and I don’t want anyone else to see this.”
That’s something, at least. She’s still trying to work out what he’s about to do when his shirt comes over his head in one swift movement. The sudden appearance of Kanan’s bare chest stuns her into speechlessness as he starts to tear the thin material into wide strips.
“Can you tie this around here?” He hands her a strip and indicates the upper part of his right arm. “Tight, like a tourniquet.”
Hera takes the offered strip slowly, confused. “What are you doing?”
“No time to explain. Just trust me.”
She ties it and pulls the knot tight, grateful that her hands are no longer shaking, though adrenaline still courses through her veins. Once Kanan is satisfied with her work he hands her the rest of the cloth strips. Then he takes a step back from her and closes his eyes. His left hand comes up to hover just over the inside of his right elbow and a small frown of concentration appears on his brow.
Hera understands what he’s doing a moment later.
Bright red splatters Kanan’s chest as something explodes out of his skin. Hera gets a glimpse of a small, credit-chip-sized electronic device floating in mid-air for a brief second. Then Kanan’s hand clenches in a fist and the device collapses in on itself, crushed by an invisible force.
Blood begins to pour from the wound in his arm and she rushes forwards with the rest of his shirt to try to stem the bleeding. The first strip wasn’t just like a tourniquet – it was a tourniquet, tight enough to slow the blood his heart is trying to beat out of his body.
She doesn’t realise she’s letting out a stream of curses as she tries to stabilise him. She’s angry, she’s scared, she’s covered in Kanan’s blood and all she wants is to be safely back on the Ghost with all the doors locked and everyone’s skin intact.
“–absolute kriffing idiot, wool-headed nerf-herder, you bantha-brained stupa–”
“We need to go,” he cuts in, stopping her tirade.
She gives the bloodied mess of material a final tug to make sure it’s tied in place and then relinquishes his arm. He immediately throws a leg over the bike and sits down heavily, and her heart softens. She’s not angry at him for hurting himself, she’s angry at the galaxy for making this mission a necessity.
Noticing his skin is pebbled with goosebumps she removes her cloak and affixes it around his shoulders before he can complain.
“Just hold on,” she tells him gently, cupping his face with one hand. “We’ll get you back to the Ghost and we can fix you up there.”
He nods in response.
She carefully places herself in front of him and feels him settle against her back. She draws his good arm securely around her waist and then revs the bike’s engines a final time, shooting away into the night.
They did a good thing today. The people they freed would be able to return home, and Kanan would be alright. She’d make sure of it. Anything else could be dealt with later.
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kyeomunism · 4 years
Text
Journal of the Bruised || Sirius Black
Pairing: Sirius Black x Fem!Reader
Marauders Era
Word Count: 2.9k
Summary: In which Sirius gets fascinated by the spitfire witch after reading her hopes and goals in a research journal.
Warnings: slight wounds, swearing, anxious thoughts, mentions of toxic parents, suggestive flirting, making out, me abusing my prompts I'm supposed to use for twelve different fanfics... (i think that's it, please tell me if I missed something.)
y/h/c=your hair color
y/l/n=your last name
y/n=your name (or just yeen:))
︵‿︵‿︵ʚ˚̣̣̣͙ɞ・༺❀༻・ ʚ˚̣̣̣͙ɞ︵‿︵‿︵
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You carefully step over some gigantic vines as you stroll around the forbidden forest. With a journal on your hand, wand in your pocket, and the bright moonlight over your head, you crouch down to get a closer look at some thorny branches and see a gleaming strand of unicorn hair entangling within it. You carefully save it in your pocket for your potions ingredients collection.
You stand up to get back to the castle without anyone noticing because getting detention would be a blow. You increase your pace, a hoard of centaurs being the least of your woes, considering the distant howls you've been hearing.
Your fear of getting in trouble at Hogwarts is just a result of your parent's high expectations, but you'll risk it for the sake of adding something to your journal. You love going to the woods at night just to pick a rare plant, animal hair, or at lucky nights, beast eggs. The moon is so bright you don't need to pull your wand out to illuminate the path.
Within a heartbeat, a loud thundering howl followed by ground-quaking steps electrify your spine. Instinct tells you to run immediately but the feel of something else's presence just several meters away glues your feet to the ground. You slowly reach for your wand as you turn. There's nothing there, but it feels like you're being watched.
A small rat came running near your direction as you inhale deeply, backing up towards the shadows just in case. A huge stag suddenly appears from where the rat came from, followed by an enthusiastic bear...no wait, you squint hard and could make up a large dog. The howling returns but this time, it's louder and scarier. Shivers overwhelm you as a full size werewolf came out of the shadows. Your free hand fly towards your mouth to stifle your terrified gasp.
You move away but not carefully enough, swearing all of them looked at your direction. The next second, you're running for your life, not daring to look back. All you know is that not only the werewolf is coming your way, but also the stag and the dog, and you don't care why. Nothing else matters as you make efforts not to scream nor show your face. It becomes harder for you through the thorny vines, wincing as the branches sting you.
Nobody can know you've been breaking the rules, not if it means getting many wounds or getting devoured alive. Nobody can know, or else your parents may force you to quit your hobbies and start preparing for work at the ministry. Oh you'd rather be dead than live without your passion.
The fear and panic about your future drives you out of the forest, not realizing until you find yourself catching breaths and applying pressure on wounds. You sit on the ground, listening to the distant howling that nearly became the last thing you heard. You check your pockets, your wand and the unicorn hair is still there.
"Damnit! Where's my journal?" You whisper-shout, bitter expression from your stinging wounds and the years long research now gone. Having the urge to lay there and cry until morning, you have no choice but to sneak back in the castle.
༺∘◦ ❀ ◦∘༻
"Who do you think that bloke was, Prongs?" Sirius asks as they sit beside Remus's hospital wing bed. "Doesn't matter now, does it? Whoever they are, they shouldn't have been idiotic enough to take a walk in the forest during a full moon," James says rather loudly.
"How 'bout you, Moons, who do you bet was it?" Peter pipes up.
"Doesn't matter, I could've killed them, worse, I could've bitten them," Remus says weakly.
Sirius brushes it off with a whole new full-proof plan for the next full moon. Something that Remus doesn't look forward to, but somehow enjoy with his friends' company. The marauders later spends the whole weekday morning in the hospital wing with the food Sirius, James and Peter got from the kitchens. The topics change each moment, until James finds a way to mock Sirius with his failed attempts at flirting with you.
"Just go talk to her!" James says between laughs.
"She doesn't even acknowledge me."
"I don't think so, it was only last quidditch practice when I heard her yell, suck it Black, when you got hit by a bludger." James, Remus and Peter laughs as Sirius's eyes widen.
Before Sirius could retort, "I gotta go prepare for my date with Evans now." James suddenly gets up, hastily messing up his hair and pocketing some sweets as his friends laugh at his ridiculous behavior.
"I'll stay here and finish these," Peter says while munching on some toast.
"I still want to know who's the owner of the journal I found a while ago. You sure you'll be good here, mate?" Sirius asks, to which Remus replies with a nod and goodluck.
༺∘◦ ❀ ◦∘༻
You're trying out spells to hide your puffy eyes from crying throughout dawn, frustratedly healing wounds. You don't want to miss breakfast to avoid suspicion, but it's hard to act normal. You finally look decent enough to your liking, but the potion made from the ingredients in your trunk did not do well on a gash on the back of your right hand, leaving a bruise. You decide to hide it in your Hogwarts robes and eat breakfast quickly.
After breakfast, you find yourself staring at the raven haired boy at the end of the hallway. Not that you expect him to care or notice you, but an inch of hope is still there. His usual unkempt hair that touches his face with such grace is just one of the many things you find attractive about him, but there was something different this time. He was holding a book, a very unusual thing to see since it's weekend.
You gasp as you walk closer in his direction, it's your journal. The thing you poured hardwork on, contains researches, discoveries and a list of dreams that had been ridiculed by your own parents. It was an extension of your soul, and it was being held by the Sirius Black.
He noticed you staring. "What's your deal, y/l/n, did you ran out of ridiculous potions to dye your hair y/h/c?"
You snap back from your thoughts. "Just a near-death experience, Black. And for the record, my hair is naturally y/h/c."
You turn around with a pounding heart. How did he find the journal? Did he read the contents? Was it that embarrassing?
Sirius watched you walk away. What does she mean by near death experience?
He looks at the journal, scans it for the second time since he found it this dawn. It's well-written and perfectly organized. He could swear he had seen the handwriting before, and the initials scribbled at the first page. Sirius decides to follow you to see if his guess is right.
༺∘◦ ❀ ◦∘༻
You sit on a part of the Hogwarts grounds away from other students, having trouble figuring out how did Sirius got your journal.
"You could've just told me this was yours."
You almost got a whiplash with Sirius's voice appearing out of nowhere. You just stared at him, examining his sharp features under the sun.
"What do you want?"
"Do you want this back?" he says, lightly waving the journal in front of you.
With a sigh, you spoke softly, "yeah. Can I have it now?"
"No."
"What?" You ask in disbelief, standing up to look at his silvery eyes.
"No, you have to reach it."
You want to whip out your wand and Accio the journal but Sirius's grin made you reach out as he waves it high above your head.
"What's wrong with your hand?" You freeze and hastily adjust your sleeves to cover it.
"You know what, I'm going back to the castle," you say half-heartedly.
"Who did this to you? I'll hex them."
"A tree branch. I would very much enjoy watching you hex it. You'll look more stupid than you already are."
"As much as I love the idea, let me see your hand first. Sirius's gentle voice almost melted you while reluctantly showing the bruise on the back of your hand. Sirius holds it, muttering an incantation under his breath. The bruise disappears in an instant.
You fill up with sudden gratitude and mixed emotions.
"I owe y—"
"No you don't. I'm doing this because I want to, deal with it. Now, tell me where you hurt yourself. Then I'll let you have your journal back."
"Why do you care anyways? I told you, I got hurt from a tree branch."
"That bruise is a cause of a potion applied on a deep gash lacking the proper incantation. What were you doing in the forbidden forest?"
"Speaking from experiences, are we, Black?" You say, highly amused. "I was just wandering around and dropped it. Are you done?"
"No, I know the easiest kind of lying is when you leave things out of a story. You could've been bitten or got killed. You're lucky Prongs and I saw you first."
You almost choked. "Excuse me? I don't know what you're talking abou—"
"I was there, me and my friends. It's a long story, y/n, so could you start first?" Your cheeks heat up at the sound of Sirius saying your first name.
"I don't think you'll understand, I'm my parent's disappointment, I'm the opposite of what they want me to be. Instead of doing my purpose, I'm out here wasting my time, trying to cope using the dumbest ways possible." You start venting out as you sit on the grass beside him.
"Believe me, I know exactly what that feels like, love." They both mentally freeze as the words slip though his mouth.
"I go through the forest just to write about the things I find there. Something I couldn't get from sitting in the library. That journal contains my hard work."
"I can tell. It's impressive and elaborate."
"Uhm, thanks. Y-you wouldn't tell anyone I was in the forest, would you?" You say hesitantly.
"If I'd tell the professors about your midnight strolls, I might as well be turning the marauders in for expulsion."
"Marauders?"
"It's my turn to explain," Sirius utters with a sigh.
You watch the handsome boy talk about his friends; how they had to transform into Animagi for the sake of keeping their friend's company—which greatly impressed you—and their mischievous whereabouts. You've never heard Sirius speak this gentle.
There so many things you wanted to say, but can't form words. "Sirius..."
His eyes meet yours for the first time you mentioned his name, and it's in a tone that he wouldn't trade for the world.
"...can I visit Remus?" you continue.
He smiles at you—a genuine smile that made your heart leap—and takes you back to the castle without a word. He gives the journal to you on the way.
Your steps are slow and steady, as if the air has never been more comfortable. You finally got to the hospital wing, and see Remus lying in bed, reading a book next to a pile of sweets his friends placed there. He looks at the two of you with a questioning stare.
"Remus, I... I was the person who saw you in the forest. Sirius told me about..."
"I'm sorry."
You felt taken aback with Remus's response.
"No, I should be sorry, I wasn't thinking. I shouldn't have been sneaking around late at night."
"That's actually a difficult habit to stop, y/n. Not that I tried," Sirius pipes up, earning chuckles from you and Remus.
You eventually become good friends with the marauders. Remus is glad you become friends because of his condition, and not inspite of it. Sirius would always ask about your day, which earns a lot of teases from James. You would still walk through the forbidden forest sometimes, but Sirius is always there to accompany you.
༺∘◦ ❀ ◦∘༻
Your NEWTs were coming near and Remus studied with you in the Gryffindor common room. It was late at night and completely silent, except for your small discussions about some topics. Several minutes pass and you find yourself talking about your feelings for Sirius, to which Remus never fail to respond with the best advices.
"Sometimes I wonder if Sirius feels the same..."
"You don't have to wonder," Remus says.
"Why?"
"Because he's right behind you." You almost jump as you hear him speak. "Mind to take a break from studying, y/n?"
You look at Remus, who shrugged with a smile. You get up and take a walk with Sirius. It was a comfortable silence, casually avoiding spots where you know people can see you and get you in detention. Your mind was going places thinking about a possible future with him. You didn't even realize you're in the astronomy tower if it wasn't for the sudden hug if cold air. You watch his eyes sparkle under the stars, standing at the huge overview of the tower.
"You wanna know how I feel about you?" You gulp at the way he broke the silence. You don't think you'll ever be ready to know. Your eyes finally met and it sent your bones to flames.
"I love you, y/n. And I've never felt more sure about anything in the world, fuck that, you are my world." The sincerity in his tone melted your brain, you couldn't string up a word.
"I can't believe we're finally here." Your throat starts to tighten with the struggle of words. "I was so scared to lose you, but I was also scared to say anything."
"Does that mean...?"
"Face first to the point and you still missed it. Of course I love you too, you idiot!"
You laugh as you jump into his arms, he gladly hugs you tight. The warmth and comfort that you felt contrasting to the cold night air felt so right.
"Hogsmeade, this weekend?" He whispers to your ear which sends shivers through your spine.
"Yes, but I don't wanna end up in detention after that."
"That's also a good idea for a first date."
You let go of the hug to look at his face.
"There's a fine line between liking you and wanting to hex you to oblivion."
"And I cross it everytime."
"Oh yes you do."
"You love it though."
"Hmm...yes I do."
With one meaningful look in his face, you press your lips against his. It's soft and gentle, firm and promising. His hand cups your face, thumb caressing your cheek. You wrap your arms around his warm body, feeling his heartbeat under his perfectly chiseled chest. After what seems like a beautiful forever, you pull away. The second you back up, a whistle and cheering made you jump.
"Prongs, Wormtail, what the hell are you doing here?" Sirius called the crackheads by the door.
"We saw you in the map, thought we've come to see the show," James says smugly.
"Want a treacle tart, y/n?" Peter says while holding half a dozen of them.
"No thanks I—"
"Hey, I thought you snuck out to the kitchens to get those for me?" You hear the distant voice of Remus, who clearly made an effort to leave his studies just to get his friends away from trouble.
"Nah Moons, 'tis the best part right here, I wanna know if Sirius messed this up," James continues with such a bright tone.
"Oh sod off, mate!" Sirius laughs as Remus take the two grown children away.
"Where were we?" You coo.
His lips brush yours passionately, like a fiery tease. You barely had a second to react and you already granted his tongue in the seam of your lips. He delved in your mouth, making you breathless. Your arms travels up to tangle around his neck to his luscious black hair. He pulls you even closer and you inhale sharply as his lips form into a smirk. He began peppering your neck with delicate kisses. You can't get enough of it, you let out pleasured tones that feels like godly music to him.
"Please, Siri... I need you."
"Absolutely, love. I will be gentle and make sure you can still walk after."
"I have seen your exes walk, no you won't," you reply. He chuckles between kisses that turned you on even more. The rest of the night will forever be one of the best things you've ever experienced.
༺∘◦ ❀ ◦∘༻
After graduating, you and Sirius joined the Order, fighting with and for each other.
One day, you and Sirius comes home from an Order mission, you have a slight bruise on your hand after falling over once in a duel with a Deatheater.
"What's wrong with your hand?" Sirius asks. Your lips forms a smile at the sudden flashback of his words.
"It's not holding yours," you reply. He lets out a bark of laughter as he checks your hand. His laugh is the nicest thing to watch and listen to.
"Wanna know what's wrong with your hands?" you ask him.
"Hmm?"
"They're not around my neck." Before you even finish the sentence you both are already laughing loudly.
He did fix what's wrong with his hand later that day, which you absolutely love.
You continue writing all your researches on your journal as you participate in the war. It all paid off because of Sirius, despite your parents' disapproval. You're with him and that's all that matters.
You eventually publish several informative books, with Sirius always by your side to support you. You both are proud of the fact that your books became the foundation research for Damocles Belby in creating the wolfsbane potion.
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whispersafterdusk · 3 years
Text
Prompt #23: Soul
The bath felt long, long overdue, even though it had barely been two days since he'd last soaked in one; living (or, RE-living) the downfall of a civilization, battling Ascians and spectral warriors...when you were rapidly pivoting from one catastrophe to the next it felt like months rather than hours.  When he'd finally had time to catch his breath, to contemplate, to rest, the first thing Sylnan had wanted was a bath.  A very...very hot bath.  And solitude.
It thankfully had only taken a simple request and now, dripping and with pruned fingers, he found himself staring over at the mirror that adorned the far wall, where his armor, weapons, and guitar hung on racks and pegs.  All he could see was...himself.  Just himself.  And all he could hear was the rustle of cloth as he dried himself, the splash of water as a precariously balanced bar of soap finally fell back into the tub, and the peculiar sound moist skin made when it was peeled up from a smooth floor.
Once close enough he reached out to touch his reflection, running his fingers over the smooth glass.
Just him.
So then...how had Seto seen...
Sylnan lowered his head and gently thunked his forehead into the mirror.  He half-expected to turn around and find Ardbert waiting on him, as he'd done so many times before.  Despite...despite everything that had happened, he hoped that that had truly not been the end of the man -- he didn't want it to have been his end.  Ardbert had been dead for an age even before Sylnan had come to the First, and they'd become quite good friends and learned a great deal about and from one another; that in the end it had fallen on Ardbert to sacrifice what was left of himself because Sylnan simply hadn't been strong enough...it felt like failure.  Or perhaps it wouldn't feel so much like a failure if Ardbert would, or could, just show himself one more time.
There was a quiet knock at the door and Sylnan jumped; he had a towel around his waist and nothing else - not exactly presentable.
"Who's there?"
"'tis only I," came Urianger's response, barely heard due to Sylnan's distance from the thick door.
"...is it urgent?" Sylnan called, padding slowly toward his bed, where his fresh clothes were laid out.
"Not immediately so."
"That's not an answer -- hang on, let me at least get my dignity covered."
He dressed quickly and then opened the door; Urianger stood on the other side, neutral expression giving way to a small smile.
"What's on fire this time?" Sylnan asked, waving him into the room.
Urianger came in and didn't answer until he stood by the table, looking over the untouched meal that sat there.  "Nothing.  Are you well?"
"Well enough.  Why?"  Urianger gestured at the food and Sylnan sighed.  "I was...going to get to it."
"Is it not to your liking?"
Sylnan snorted loudly.  "Please.  I feel we've known one another long enough to know I have yet to meet a food I didn't care for.  It just...slipped my mind, is all.  The bath ran a bit longer than intended."  Slowly the man looked between the table, the bath, and Sylnan -- he didn't need to speak for Sylnan to hear - no, feel - the doubt radiating off him.  "All right, all right, fine -- I wasn't hungry.  Too...caught up inside my own head, I suppose."
"Do you wish for an ear?"
He brushed wet hair out of his face.  "It's just - you don't see or sense anything different about me, do you?"
Urianger shook his head.  "Neither myself nor Y'shtola detected anything amiss.  Why?"
"It's...Ardbert.  I can't stop thinking of him -- or maybe, thinking of me, all things considered.  The things we've learned, we've found, the questions I've got, and yet it boils down to feeling as though I failed him.  He suffered for years, he deserves a peaceful rest knowing his legacy was redeemed, and yet-"  Sylnan stopped and let out a sigh that trailed into a raspberry.  "Seto saw him one last time so I feel there's still SOMETHING left of him, inside.  But damn me if I know how to separate us again so he goes to his earned rest."
Urianger listened silently, and at first all he offered was a nod; he settled into a chair at the table, bracing his elbows against the wood and steepling his fingers together before looking up at him from behind his hands.  "I see, and also hear those things you've left unspoken, as they have been upon my mind as well."
Sylnan gave his hair one last rub with the towel and tossed it on the floor beside the tub, then went over to the bed; beneath the pillow he pulled out a bright orange crystal and ran his finger over the delicate carving on its front.  "If I could just let go of him...let him move on..."
As a silence fell Sylnan came over to sit across from Urianger, setting the stone on the table between them.  Urianger reached out to gently take it, turning it over between his fingers.
"...there is much to think about, to be certain.  However things may go in the future, whatever form of existence our friend finds himself in now, I hope he holds close the fact that his bravery and sacrifices saved not only his world, but ours."
Sylnan smiled.  "Yes...he did do that.  I just wish I could tell him directly."
Urianger returned the smile, then glanced to the door.  "I did come to tell you that our expedition has been arranged, and we set out anon."
"Oh?  When exactly?"
"Tomorrow morning.  Knowing Thancred, 'tis like to be at dawn or near enough to it."
"Ah.  I shall be there, of course."
With a nod Urianger stood and headed for the door; he paused within the doorway to look back to Sylnan again.  "Should anything weigh your thoughts further, I am willing to listen."
"I know and I appreciate it, even if I fear you might think me a bit mad if I tried to put anything into words.  It's been...quite the experience."
Sylnan watched as Urianger's gaze moved pointedly to where the guitar hung.
"You'll forgive me if I do not believe you unable to properly arrange thy words."
"Not everything is a song, friend."
"That has never stopped you before."
Sylnan made a shooing motion.  "I'll see you in the morning, bright and unfortunately early."
The man smiled and turned, the door shutting softly behind him.  His bath done, Sylnan walked over to the window and threw it wide open, looking out into the countryside outside the Crystarium.
A world at peace, thanks to the sacrifice of a heroic soul.
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