#that got so long and sappy

[babygirlphil]

tell me what the video Basically, I’m Gay means to you?

Omg...this is such a tough question. When it came out, I had almost completely left the phandom. BIG dragged me back in by the ankles. I was pretty resigned to the idea that dnp were just going to remain in a glass closet forever and never come out officially. So imagine my shock when I woke up from a nap and saw that notification.

It obviously means a lot to me as a long-time phannie. It confirmed that I wasn't just a crazy fangirl who was seeing things that weren't there or being manipulated by two straight men who were savvy marketers.

More importantly though, If it hadn't been for BIG helping me to realize I was a lesbian, I would have never come back to the phandom. If I hadn't come back to the phandom I would have never met my real best friend, companion through life, like actual soulmate. Dan might get on my nerves sometimes, but I'm incredibly grateful to him for being brave enough to share his journey of self discovery with the internet bc it inadvertently changed the course of my entire life.

I'm so glad this community exists. It's brought me so much joy during the hard times and I'm not sure I'd be where I am today without it. I think if anyone is put on this earth for a purpose, then Dan and Phil's is bringing people together. So many of us have met our best friends/SOs through the phandom.

So Dan and Phil...if you ever read this...thank you. From the bottom of my heart.

[ruporas]

bound to want (part two) /// part one rest of pages under READ MORE after ID

[ID: 23 page digital comic of Vashwood from Trigun Maximum. The comic is in a limited palette of a dark blue, light pink, white, black, and a light beige color for Vash's skin and a mid-brown color for Wolfwood's. This comic is the second part to "Bound to Want" and is spoiler-free. The first part is linked here.

It begins with a panel close up of Vash's expressions. The sky colored in dark blue can be seen behind him. He has a neutral expression, but he holds a slight frown and the reflection of his glasses covers one side of his eyes. Wolfwood says, "Hey. What's with the distance?" In the second panel, the shot widens to show both of them, a clear physical distance separating them with Wolfwood walking ahead and Vash trailing a little behind. Vash responds, "What? I'm just walking a bit slower today..." Wolfwood looks at him with a an irritated expression, clicking his tongue. Wolfwood says, "I was going to wait for you to start... But yer just running away away."

Vash is seen looking away, unable to hold eye contact with Wolfwood as he continues, "You've been avoiding me since that night. Did ya think I wouldn't notice? It's about that dream, right? Tell me about it already if you're going to be moping like this." Vash looks slightly downwards, his brows furrowing and he starts to walk ahead of Wolfwood without looking at him and responds stiffly, "I really don't want to talk about it..." Wolfwood looks at him with a surprised expression, but doesn't probe.

A panel close up to Wolfwood's eyes as he watches Vash go on ahead before he follows suite with an irritated sigh. The panels are overlapped by Wolfwood's hand holding the bottle of the Bride with motion lines, indicating a transition in time.

A wide shot of Vash and Wolfwood in a room now. Vash is seated, his back turned away from the viewer, while Wolfwood's body faces the viewer with his eyes looking towards Vash. He rests the bottle of the Bride on the table with a "clack" and his other hand holds two shotglasses. The background is coated in a light pink.

A panel shows a close up of Wolfwood's face, his eyes looking downwards to Vash as he says, "Let's drink." Next to this panel is Vash looking up at Wolfwood, his brows furrowed and a slight frown. The bottom half of the page is a wider shot with Vash's body turned away from the viewer as he says, "I'm not going to talk about it." Wolfwood responds, "You don't have to." as he sits down.

A wide panel of Wolfwood holding the shotglass, pouring in the drink as he continues, "I'll talk." The next panel is a profile view of Wolfwood, his eyes looking down at the now filled shotglass as he continues to say, "You're..."

"... upset with me." Vash can be seen next to this speech bubble with narrowed eyes, looking towards Wolfwood. The panels are all coated in with a dark blue background. Wolfwood continues, "I can't be certain why since yer not telling me a thing -- but it's probably... my bad." The panels show Wolfwood about to bring the shotglass to his mouth but he turns way as he continued to speak, his eyes not on Vash. The bottom page shows him looking away completely with a guilty expression as he says, "I'm sorry.

If you can ever tell me why, I can try and adjust to make it more bearable. But if you're just trying to get rid of me--" The panels follow Wolfwood's certain expression as he says this, "I don't intend to leave you. I can't... and I won't." A panel shows Vash's wide-eyed expression, surprised upon hearing this, and then his eyes soften as Wolfwood again concludes with, "I'm sorry."

Vash's inner thoughts begins, a boxed speech at the center of the page and panels of his eyes, his brows furrowing again and a resigned, but frustrated expression. His thoughts starts, "Stop. I shouldn't be happy hearing that. And why are you apologizing? I should be the one to..! I can't let anything like that happen to you. You deserve to live a long steady and peaceful life. I want to be optimistic. I want to protect you, but I might end up doing the opposite." The text surrounds Wolfwood from Vash's perspective, the other man drinking out of his shotglass, his eyes downcasted.

"I shouldn't have you. And you won't leave." Behind these text is a panel of Wolfwood's eyes finally looking over to Vash. Vash's thoughts continues,  "It's so unfair." When Wolfwood sees Vash, his eyes soften and he frowns. The last panel shows the lower half of Vash's face, but tears begins to flow down his cheek. Wolfwood's hand is already reaching to wipe at them as he starts to say, "You know..."

A wider shot of Vash and Wolfwood, Vash slightly leaning forward with his mouth tightly shut, and tears steadily continuing to flow out of his closed eyes. Wolfwood continues to wipe at them with his hand as he continues, "This isn't a dream anymore. I don't know what you saw for you to be this shaken up, but whatever happened, you'll overcome it, right? If not you, I'm here too. You'll be okay, Spikey. So..." Wolfwood's expression grows more tender, "Have a little faith in me... and come back already." The dark blue starts to fade.

The wide panel has the dark blue background faded and replaced is the light pink. It shows Vash in full up to his shoulders, his eyes are still tears littered, but there's light in them as he says, "Wolfwood..." making eye contact with the other. The next panel shows Wolfwood's tender expression, his eyes and brows fully soften and he has a small smile on his lips, finally seeing the other return a level of sincerity with him.

The next panel shows the bottom half of Wolfwood's face and his hand is offered towards Vash for a dance as he says, "C'mon. We don't have to talk, but this is okay, right?" The background is now white and a ribbon flowing across the page separates this panel from the next sequence. Vash's inner thoughts continus, "I've spent too long avoiding this. It's scary to want after I've taken so much from others." A sequence close up of their hands is shown, with Wolfwood's outstretched hand on the right and Vash's reaching hand on the left. Vash gently places his hand in Wolfwood and at the bottom, Wolfwood wraps his fingers across Vash's.

Throughout the page, a dark blue ribbon starts to flow around the both of them with confetti raining alongside the effect. Vash and Wolfwood are hand and hand, dancing together with Wolfwood as the lead. The viewer can see a peak of Vash's expression, full of fondness but also a hint of sorrow as he looks down at Wolfwood. His inner thoughts continue, "I don't deserve this. I don't deserve you. But why is that even though I have these burdens, I still want to love you. I still want you to be by my side."

With a close up of their mouths, Vash's thoughts continue, the text covering his mouth, "Wolfwood, I--" Wolfwood's speech bubble covers Vash's text as he completes his sentence, "want you." Vash's eyes widen for one panel and in the next, his eyes spark, a blush appearing on his cheek and the confetti flows and spark. Tears ease up on his eyes again.

"Want me too already, Spikey." Wolfwood has leaned in enough to rest his head against Vash, a hand of his on Vash's neck, holding his nape and another hand pressed gently against his back. A ribbon separates this panel from the next, a mix of confetti flows across the page, as Vash envelopes Wolfwood in a hug too, holding him and his hand gripping tightly onto his back.

This page is just the ribbon flowly throughout the page on the white background, one white ribbon and the other a dark blue. Near the bottom, the ribbon envelopes each other in a loop. A conversation of Vash and Wolfwood is held over these ribbons, Vash starting to say, "What if I hurt you? What if you..?" Wolfwood responds, "You? How could you hurt me?" Vash, "You know what I mean... You see it everyday..." Wolfwood responds, "If you think I'm going to kick the bucket so easily, I suggest you look at me more closely from now on, idiot. I'm not that easy to get rid of."

The next page has the ribbon criss cross over the top of the page. Vash and Wolfwood can be seen in their dancing position again, Wolfwood now resting a hand on Vash's shoulder, as Vash takes the lead. Vash continues, "Well, I know that... I tried." Wolfwood responds, "But you won't anymore... since you want me... around, yeah?" Wolfwood's head cocks to the side, smiling with assurance, cheeks flushed. Vash looks at him with a wide smile and fond, loving eyes. The confetti flows across the bottom of this page and as it eases into the next page, it starts to disappear.

Vash responds, ".. Yeah... I do..." as he pulls Wolfwood into a hug again. Wolfwood says, "Not going to run away anymore, are you?" Vash says, "No... I trust you." A panel shows Wolfwood's turning away slightly with a shy expression, muttering "Geez..."

In a more simplified style, Wolfwood is seen gripping Vash's cheeks now with his hand, "Though... You do remember you avoided me for two weeks straight, right? How are you going to make that up to me?" Wolfwood asks. Vash responds with eyes closed and a pucker of his lips. A vein of irritation appears on Wolfwood's face. Wolfwood starts to squeeze at Vash's cheek with both hands, shouting, "Now that you've recovered, you're trying to be funny, huh?!" Vash says through the squished cheeks, "I'm just happy..."

The next page opens with a closed up panel of Vash's widen eye as Wolfwood's hand moves from squishing his cheeks to gently holding them and Wolfwood leans in. The inner thoughts starts again, "There's a chance I'm not making the right choice... My dreams, my fears of losing you, it will never go away. But you said you won't let it happen... And I want to hang onto your words closely this time. After all, if it's anyone who can make me believe, it's you."  The white ribbon from previous pages flows across the page and it visibly ends at the bottom of the page, enclosing the two of them as they share a gentle kiss with Vash holding Wolfwood's face, a tear in his eye.

The next pages starts with Wolfwood saying, "You cryin' again?" Vash responds, "I'm just grateful..." Wolfwood responds, "But you've always had me." Vash responds, "Being like this is different from staring at you from behind all the time though..." The two can be seen together again, Wolfwood pressing his elbows against the table with Vash leaning over him. Wolfwood is easing the tears out of Vash's eye again, just like earlier. A close panel of Vash's fond expression is seen as he says, "Thank you, Wolfwood." Wolfwood looks up at him with a small smile, gentle eyes. Confetti starts to flow lightly across the page as text starts to appear against the white background, "I'm the one who's grateful...

That you'd embrace someone like me, when I'm not fit to hold you in the first place... But I know better than to hesitate. The moment I acknowledged it, I knew I'd spend the rest of my life loving you. So, have as much of me as you want, Vash."

The final page shows the confetti gently falling down the page and at the bottom shows Vash and Wolfwood pressing their foreheads together, Wolfwood's hands cupping the side of Vash's face gently, and both of them smiling brightly with each other. ID END]

[fennthetalkingdog]

Dang, being nonhuman really is just like being trans, where I look back at my life and go, "Ohhhhhhhh, so THAT'S where it came from." It's easy for me to fall into the habit of thinking, "Well I just found this new label but I don't want it to infiltrate my whole life." But... it already has. All those moments pretending to be a cat on the playground, making fake "dog packs" with my friends, wrestling with my dog and laying next to her as if I was just another pup, attaching to my dog and cat stuffed animals, making dog-like noises to supplement my words, pretending I had (and still have) a tail to wag when I wanted, shaking out my "fur" and huffing just because I "liked mimicking my dog"—those were all my nonhumanity shining through. Me identifying with the nonhuman/therian label isn't an outliner, it's just the trend.

[mars-ipan]

some postgame doodles for pride month

[just-somedude]

.

[good-beanswrites]

I wanted to bring up a silly ship idea. Just for fun.

03, 06, 09, 10

Was this before Kotoko attacked them? After? I dunno.

Thoughts?

YES the cringefail 20yo polycule 👏👏👏 Thank you for the request! I've seen a lot about the individual pairs, so it was really fun to think about all their dynamics together! I have a set of hcs that could work in the current canon Milgram, and then a normal au set because it's so fun thinking about them :3

Milgram-focused

The I’m-a-loner-who’s-doing-it-for-justice-don’t-TOUCH-me pair finally meet their match when confronted with the I-loved-someone-so-much-and-don’t-plan-on-stopping pair. They all go into the relationship with grand ideas of love: they think it’s all heroic acts of saving, massive gestures or love, and dramatic confessions. Over time, they realize the real heroism/romance is in the little things. 

Mahiru has her hands full with three people who neglect themselves for the sake of their work/interests, but she always loves feeding them and helping give them what they need. In turn, they can give her more affection and attention than she could ever ask for. They make sure someone is always around to spend time with her.

Each of the three is a perfect match for dealing with John’s reveal. Mahiru is calming and helps tone down Mikoto’s initial stress. Fuuta is honest and will help Mikoto finally confront his own situation and move forward. And since Kotoko can match his strength, Mikoto doesn’t need to be afraid of accidentally hurting anyone. Mikoto becomes less stressed with the overall situation as well as more accepting of himself/John.

I always love the idea that Fuuta is secretly starstruck by Kotoko and John’s strength. He’ll never admit how much he admires their ability to stand up and fight. He feels really safe around them. He’s glad to have the opportunity to fight for someone else, too – he likes to be Mahiru’s self-proclaimed protector and hero. (Even though most of the time she can stand up for herself, she still likes letting him take care of her.)

Kotoko’s experiences let her hold solid conversations with everyone. She’s similar enough to Fuuta where they share some interests (social issues, schooling, etc.) She understands hard work and burnout to earn Mikoto’s respect. She understands physical strength to earn John’s. She has a lot of people-knowledge, so she can gossip and talk about Tokyo life to Mahiru (Mappi’s doing most of the ‘gossiping,’ but Kotoko has solid additions). She's a good listener and has a good memory, so everyone feels heard by her.

They start to rub off on each other. Mahiru and Mikoto learn to be a bit tougher in standing up for herself. Fuuta, John, and Kotoko learn to take a breath before jumping right to violence. They stay very much who they are, but pick up on just a few habits that make their lives easier.

Their styles also influence one another: Fuuta gets pointers from all three about piercing his ears (though it takes him a long time to get up the nerve to do it). Mahiru helps the others dress more trendy and boost their confidence, and they teach her to worry less about her appearance and relax more. 

If they get together T1, Kotoko is shocked by the T1 verdicts. She might pull away from everyone in initial horror, but after developing a relationship ahead of time, she doesn’t follow through with her attacks. If not, then maybe in T3 when Kotoko is suffering from her guilty verdict, Mahiru and Mikoto are able to bridge the gap and develop a friendship, leading to more. Fuuta would take longer to come around, but I think seeing Kotoko got through the same pain as him, his hero instincts would kick in and he’d gradually help. 

Normal-au

Mahiru once again tries out her lovers’ interests, and gets a bunch of new hobbies. Fuuta teaches her to game, she works out with Kotoko, and she tries out photography with Mikoto. She becomes close with Fuuta’s beautician sister, and enjoys bonding over fashion and hair. She helps redye Mikoto’s hair, and give the other two pointers on style now and then. When going to nicer events, she and Mikoto have to step in and stop the others from their sneaker/hoodie combos. As the only one with a license, she’s the designated driver at all events, but doesn’t mind. 

Fuuta uses his tech skills to set up social media accounts for the others. He helps Mahiru network her flower shop, fighting anyone who leaves a bad comment/review. He helps set up a complex online portfolio for Mikoto. He and Kotoko still have a passion for justice, and he becomes the tech brains behind her vigilante operations (very Ron Stoppable - Kim Possible) It’s not necessarily healthy growth, but they’re happy with it lmao

Mikoto is the only full-time worker, the others are all still in university, and he makes sure to keep them all on track. He knows the most efficient tricks and cheats about getting papers done, pulling all-nighters, and cramming before an exam. The others have learned to spot when he’s burning himself out for others, and will stop him when he tries to take on too much. They’ll take care of him and force him to rest. While he can still get into a bit of trouble, John learns to call them first and get some help. 

Kotoko has trained herself to find people and information easily to catch criminals, but she finds use for it in much more mundane ways – she tracks down clients for Mahiru, snoops around Mikoto’s company to make sure he’s being treated right, and keeps an eye out for the people Fuuta is calling out and/or hanging out with. She goes on runs with Mahiru, and bike rides with Mikoto. Fuuta tags along sometimes to strengthen his legs for soccer. 

There’s definitely potential for them all to have their murders pre- or mid- relationship, and they help one another improve themselves and heal. I’m also a sucker for the relationship itself to cause them to change their ways and narrowly avoid the murder in the first place. (For the latter, Mahiru would ironically be the last to join the relationship, since she’d still be with her bf until the other three inspire her to break it off with him gently.)

[cecropiacrown]

Finished my first prompt for @fengqingaction ! This was requested by @maliwolfalia on twitter.

Mu Qing hates being touched—or at least that's what he says. Feng Xin knows this about his friend and roommate and he respects it wholeheartedly. He would never cross that clearly defined boundary.

But in those quiet hours before dawn, there are many hidden things that can come to light. OR: Mu Qing asks Feng Xin to hold him <3

[taegularities]

just thinking thoughts

[shleemies]

2015->2023

It gets better

[girlfox]

just peeking in to say that i'm lurking !! i hope you're all having a good day or night. ♡ i have to super - focus on my assignments tonight & tomorrow so i won't be around much but, i still wanted to pop out of the woodworks for a second.

i guess life update ?? i'm on the third to last week of school before the semester ends so i'm almost done yay !! ( until september ... but i might take a summer class ... ) also i'm making dutch croquette from my opa's recipe this week and i'm sooooo excited because it's something i really really miss from home and you can't really get it anywhere, frozen or fresh. AND i got a new giant flowering plant from the plant - guy at my office, and i dunno but i laurv u all. MWAH MWAH MWAH.

[dandyshucks]

one of the kiddos really loves rabbits and we're not able to really do much for Easter related activities irl so I thought I'd draw them with their favourite rabbit 'mon ... perhaps a gift from Guz,,,,,

[itsoneofthemuses]

fic: you’re one of the few things that i’m sure of (1/2)

title: you’re one of the few things that i’m sure of, part 1/2, here on AO3

rating: teen, because there are some mild allusions

warnings: none, but you may need to see the dentist after you read this

a/n: this is 1000% the fault of @farfarawaygirl but, @onlyforchenford also encouraged this.  If you must blame someone, blame them.  Me?  I am blameless, but a tool in the hands of these demanding masters.

Title is from J.P. Saxe’s The Few Things

Summary: Tim struggles with being in Metro for the exact same reasons Hicks’ wanted out.  Lucy understands, she’s a cop too, but Tim wishes he could be there all the time, every time, anyway.  Well, he’s always been a show you kind of guy, hasn’t he?  Tim shows Lucy and shows up for Lucy.

P.S. Go watch this, but AFTER you read the chapter

[notetaeker]

October 25, 2022 - Tuesday | Fall challenges 14/30 + 10/30

Only one class today! I sketched some grapes yesterday and spent a big chunk of today painting them I was so excited abt it I rlly got up at 7 AM to start on it. Today I also: showered, listened to lectures, wrote review sheets for two classes, and compiled an exam. A solid 9/10 day: MUCH better than yesterday. Alhamdullillah 💓

When did you make the blog, what were its goals and did you achieve them? I made it in 2016! I was a sophomore in college and was posting a lot of studying pics on my insta and a friend was like I love ur posts u should start a studyblr! And i was like !!! Yeah !! b/c i was alr on tumblr posting kpop gifs since like. 2012 🤡 I made the blog to document my studying and it has been a diary of sorts. I never felt any pressure to get likes n rbs on here because I was doing it more to keep record, so it was stress-free and less chaotic than my other 300 blogs. And more stable! My other blogs I always delete and remake and change the url and go on hiatus but this one has always been there with the same url lol honestly it has helped me thru a lot of times when I hit a wall and it was soooo hard to study / get things done. I’ve always used it mainly as a tool for me to keep myself accountable whenever I need a push. Only recently after doing a few productivity challenges have I started actually posting here regularly =]

[theprotagonistisdead]

loona 6th anniversary this week. what can i say. being an orbit for the past six years has been such an up and down journey, through the drought between "butterfly" and "so what", their slowly rising success in 2020 and 2021, haseul's hiatus and return, everything that queendom 2 was (both the positive and negative), the massive light it shone on the group, the messy world tour and eventual lawsuits. i remember how shocked and confused I was in November 2022 when Chuu got kicked out, only for many idols to stand up for her. For all of the girls to sue Blockberry, eventually being successful in their lawsuits. I'm sad that they are not together in one group right now, but at the same time, their projects are wonderful. They show the individual membbers' talents and passion and as a fan, they are thrilling to witness. This might be the best time to be an Orbit. Additionally, the members have said, again and again, that they are still part of loona and cheer each other on continuously. I hope that soon, we will be able to see them on the stage together again, and until then and after, I will be glad (and a little bit proud) to have always stuck to their side. Loona is on of my favourite musicians ever right now, and I think this love for them will continue for a long time.

[no27-autonation-honda]

thank you to everyone who gave me advice on preparing for my first ever Tisha b’av service last night! I was surprisingly well prepared and it was a beautiful service

[teddybeartoji]

sorry if this is weird mickey but i just . love how you write for yourself!! i feel like there's not a ton of writers who do male and fem and gn readers and idk the way you do it makes me feel ..?? like bittersweet in the sense that i wanna be comfortable with my gender like that BUT MORESOOO it makes me feel so euphoric that i can at least pretend to be like the reader. like i wanna be them and i can close my eyes and feel like them, even if for a little bit. i haven't found many other writers that give me that same feeling and maybe that's my own fault idk but i just . i love you and i think you're just so cool and talented and !!!!

PERCE MY ANGEL!!!!!!!!!!!! IT'S NOT WEIRD AT ALL!!!!!!!!!!!! while you're 100% right about me writing for myself, i am always so SOOO fucking happy to hear that others like and find comfort in my writings too. ESPECIALLY IF IT'S GOT ANYTHING TO DO WITH GENDER!!!!!!! i'm just so glad that i can give you even an ounce of that gender euphoria, even if it's through your imagination, even if it's just for a moment!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! i love you!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

but i also want you to know that i still struggle with it too!!! i get confused and i get weirded out because it's hard to jump from one thing to another all the time but again.. it just feels so much more safer and more Okay now that i have you and other friends who i know feel the same way. we're all in this fucked up gender blender together<33333333333

also!!!!! when i started writing i only did it for fem readers you know... so it's been a long journey and honestly.. taking the risk and writing about male readers when i had never ever done that before has quite literally done so much for me. like i feel better in my skin now, i feel better about being genderfluid. it's still a new thing for me but truly.. i do encourage writing for the reader YOU want to be. if you're feeling more masc, go for it. more fem, go for it. the others will love it either way. i can promise you that. they will!!!!!!!!

i was scared that male reader things would not get as much attention at first but when i realized how much i wanted to write for them it just didn't matter anymore. and when you can really write for yourself - it shows you know? like if i didn't care for my male readers the way that i do i doubt you'd be here with this ask. idk if that makes sense. i hope it does. i'm just trying to say that gender is fucked up and it's weird and it's confusing but putting into words can be a bit more grounding. this is getting so sappy lmao i'm sorry i just yeah it's been a lot of experimenting and it's about stepping out into the light and sharing your own 'silly' desires. bc they're not actually silly. they're real and they're valid and you SHOULD be talking about them. it feels good!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

ANYWAY YAP YAP YAP THANK YOU SO MUCH FOR ALL THE LOVE YOU'VE GIVEN ME PERCE!!!!!!!!!!!! I GOT UR BACK IN ALL OF THIS OKAY!!!!!!! MALE READER FEM READER GN READER THEY'RE ALL FOR YOU!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! YOU ARE SHARING A PIECE OF YOURSELF WITH US AND THAT'S BEAUTIFUL!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! I LOVE YOU I LOVE YOU I LOVE YOUU<33333333333