#that hurt so much i can't stop crying

[nandalikesstuff]

Just got punched in the face and kicked down a hill by the last 2 eps of the hxh chimera ant arc holy shit

[southernreaches]

i need help with vet bills (again).

hi. for those of you who remember, earlier this year i asked for donations to help me afford toos' vet bills, who we found out through your help had kidney failure, and again with your help we got her on medication for it. unfortunately it wasn't enough, and we lost her. and then shortly after, dexter began deteriorating, which we put down to his grief of losing toos - she kept him young, he followed her everywhere, he only played because of her, he only ate when she ate, etc. without her he just stopped. and then he started to have seizures and fits daily. we got him blood tests, but he was suffering so badly. we made the decision to put him down. i didn't ask for donations this time, because i was so deeply embarrassed to ask for help again. but we are still recovering financially from that, as well as the parts of toos bills that didn't get covered from donations. my mother hasn't worked for a very long time, she's disabled and very sick, and she receives PIP from the government that only covers her monthly medications that are not covered by the NHS. my father retired early to become her full time carer, and we are living off his pension. i am too disabled to work, but because my mother already receives PIP and i live with them, the government are resistent to giving me any help - so i have zero income, and rely entirely on my parents.

this is jenny. she's a 14 year old cairn terrier, who loves when we garden because she wants to help dig holes. she helped us bury dexter and toos, digging their graves for them with my dads help. she's an angel, and loves people so much she likes to escape under the fence and join other families for awhile. one time she got into someones back garden and asked to come in as they were eating lunch. she really hates flies, and will try to bite them out of the air (she has never succeeded but i believe she will one day). she will rub her face against you until you start stroking her, and will growl and even bark if you stop! we don't have the money to take jenny to the vets, for a checkup or for anything they may want to do. this has been an ongoing issue, but toos and dexter took priority, and it hasn't been a bother to her. she existed as normal for a long time, but that's since changed.

jenny has this lump in her mouth, it is larger than the picture shows, but she is a nightmare to force open her mouth since this got so big, i think it's uncomfortable or painful for her. she can't properly close her lips now, and it has pushed all her front teeth away, misshaping her mouth, and sometimes it bleeds profusely. eating has become difficult for her, she can't eat anything hard, and currently will only eat soft human foods like rice, scrambled egg chopped up so small she doesn't have to chew, and things like soups and gravy. she's lost a lot of weight, and i'm getting frightened. to add onto it, i've found lumps like this across her body. i've done as much research as i can, and i believe it to be an oral tumor, it fits, and it looks right, and it spreading across her body is called 'full staging'. and going by all i've read - they will want to remove them in surgery. according to my research, this will cost anywhere from £585 - £4,740 for just the lump in her mouth. that's not including any checkup/test costs, or the other lumps on her body.

she hasn't been to the vet yet, i don't have any secure goal or bills to share, just my assumptions and beliefs from researching myself online. my parents refuse to take her because we can't afford it. i want to save up money, have it in my bank, and show them that we can help her now, before it gets worse, or it's too late. as i said before, i don't have any income, so the only way i can do this is with help.

here's a link to my paypal.me

the icon is a little mouse, and the @ is rivellon

i struggled so badly posting the first post like this for toos. i felt so guilty and embarrassed and ashamed. but i have no choice again, i want to help jenny. i don't want her to suffer. and selfishly, i can't handle losing another dog so soon. this year has been waking nightmare, and i need your help to stop it getting even worse.

please reblog and share, even if you can't donate.

thank you for reading.

[brown-little-robin]

あ

[money-and-dandellions]

continuation to this post:

Meg who unintentionally and absolutely illogically gets worried when Lester gets sick after the ghoul incident and he doesn't really understand why would she do that

until he does

[spacemancharisma]

.

[dolceterzo]

crying about terzo hours. oh, my love.

[dead-salmon]

this is me ranting about season's of blossom/hamin's flower, so TW SUICIDE, but anyways i don't know what's worse:

->hamin sacrificing his freedom so that jaemin could live freely, yet that freedom making jaemin feel like he's suffocating years down the line

-> somang's speech on how it's because of everyone that hamin killed himself, yet how it's none of their faults, especially not hamin's own

-> them using the phrase "disappeared from this world" to describe his suicide, not outright saying he killed himself

-> the theme of radiance. hamin feeling like somang was the radiant one and he was drenched in darkness, thus trying to distance himself from her. yet somang describing the summer with hamin her most radiant time, only because of his presence in her life, because he shined the brightest to her

-> jaemin who loved the rain because good things always happen to him then just for hamin to kill himself on a day where it rained non-stop. hamin who hated the rain but learnt to love it compared to jaemin who loved it but now dislikes it

-> hamin's suicide indirectly preventing gaeul's and dongchae's attempts. somang being unknowingly destined to lose a loved one either way

-> jaemin's parents not knowing how to handle hamin's suicide, his mother depending on him to be happy and his father being distant and too lax on everything. driving him further into his own abyss. hamin having sacrificed his happiness and acting too grown up for his age to protect jaemin from their parents strictness. jaemin ending up doing the same for his mother, faking a smile and comforting her about the pain of hamin's suicide

-> hamin not having heard the latter part of jaemin telling seonhui that while he resents hamin a little, he still loves hamin most of all. hamin having died thinking jaemin hates him, somang's last words to him calling him a coward

-> jaemin being lowkey passively suicidal and even trying a form of self-harm to understand hamin and deal with the pain of losing hamin

-> the fact that we start hamin's story already knowing how it ends

[dinosauring130]

You know you have a problem when you start RELATING to the song Waving Through A Window

[solitaireships]

I know that most people don't like James and it's fine if they make fun of him. But someone calling him a dumbass in my replies on twitter really made an already rough day even worse. He's not stupid and I hate how much people will discount every part of his character to talk about how he's the worst person in the world bcs god forbid people be able to talk about a villain while admitting they have any positive qualities or strengths

[lucyvaleheart]

fuck fuck fuck fuck everything hurts so much

ii. i need help i don't know how or why from who but i can't keep this up im in so much pain i can hardly think i can't move i can't pick anything up i can't hardly walk or. fuck

i don't know why I'm posting this please just ignore it

[coffeeworldsasaki]

Okay if my girlfriend is able to help me out I'll try getting over my ocd issue with the Bad Number

[cannibalisticskittles]

my builder is pissed at absolutely everyone inside this cell but they have never had any positive feelings towards yan whereas they Thought Miguel Was Their Friend (he came to their BIRTHDAY PARTY!!!) and pen was at soulmate-level, so. while yan definitely deserves a verbal beatdown, the one he receives is.... going to involve a lot of rage that is really meant for the other two that my builder isn't able to express towards them right now. but he's an asshole, so while it's technically misplaced, it's still deserved.

mentioning mi-an is also a terrible choice bc it just reminds her of how much of an ass he's been to mi-an, who is, by all accounts, a very nice girl. that just turns the rage back to full force. very "and ANOTHER thing!"

[cherrylight]

sighs.

[sylvia-de-silva]

Reem, Reem

Soul of my soul

I weep no tears for you.

Love was always too weak

a word; and still God loved you

more than I; it's why

he called you from my arms,

so soon; just long

enough for a window,

into my Paradise; yet

not long enough to let

the world hurt you

any more than it has done.

Reem, Reem

light of my heart; I rejoice

for it will never be you

who bears this hurt

this agony, this world,

He loves you so much

He could never bear to

see you in pain for His glory

the way I am blessed to suffer.

I praise His name,

prostrate with gratitude,

I am in a grief glorious

for this gift of His love,

of your love, this howling love,

these hallowed flames

this blessing of a love

that would hurt this much.

Reem, Reem,

my angel on earth,

now you are one in Heaven.

God sings you lullabies

sweeter than I ever could,

cradles you more gently

than I ever would,

Spirited you into

an eternal dream

softer than I could ever

spin you.

Reem, Reem,

I know my tears

broke your little heart, you

never could stand to see them.

So I try to not let them fall.

But darling, if I fail,

don't be sad;

These are glad tears,

patient tears, blessed tears,

knowing because of you

my love for God is stronger

His shield over my soul truer;

that a love that gave me you,

will never keep us apart,

for longer than I can endure

Tw: video of small dead child cradled by grandfather in Gaza under the cut. In an interview he called her "the soul of my soul".

[youremyonlyhope]

why won't my brain shut up why won't my brain shut up why won't my brain shut up why won't my brain shut up

[zoennes]

“Is it me or there was a really weird vibe going on between Zoë and Senne?”