thinking about gale, who likes to walk up to john while john is sitting down just so he can see pretty, earnest blue eyes look up at him and watch a boyish smile quirk corners of lips up over sharp canines, the bounce of curls as his head tilts up akin to dog ears going all perky
and thinking about john, who likes to make himself small on his knees at gale's feet so he can watch fond blue eyes swallow him whole before he's pulled on top of warm thighs like an oversized lap dog, knees bumping hips, firm hands wandering and noses nudging at collarbones and murmurs of affection (and of other things)
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Morning losers💕
7:10am EST
Slept okay. Feeling kinda numb this morning after all the drama and shit that went down yesterday. Hoping today is a better day…
If I don’t reply to DMs quickly I’m sorry but I will get to them tonight💕
I love you
Remember
You are loved
You are wanted
Take your meds
Drink your water
Be kind to yourself
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olivia rodrigo’s “the grudge” + mickey milkovich
- I have nightmares each week about that Friday in May
One phone call from you and my entire world was changed
Trust that you betrayed, confusion that still lingers
Took everything I loved and crushed it in between your fingers
And I doubt you ever think about the damage that you did
But I hold on to every detail like my life depends on it
My undying love, now, I hold it like a grudge
And I hear your voice every time that I think I'm not enough -
- And I try to be tough, but I wanna scream
How could anybody do the things you did so easily?
And I say I don't care, I say that I'm fine
But you know I can't let it go, I've tried, I've tried, I've tried for so long
It takes strength to forgive, but I don't feel strong -
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actually getting out of academia at this time in my life is the best thing i could've done for myself - i was wandering around like a ghost thinking only about theory and poetry and feeling superior to every single person around me. now i'm teaching special needs and disabled teenagers and i'm actively improving the lives of kids every day, making them laugh, having great conversations, helping them understand tricky concepts and feeling immensely proud. my students are the absolute best and it's such a joy when they engage with how i teach them and have fun learning. i still read and write poetry, read theory, and i've been thinking about d.h. lawrence non-stop for a month, but i now actually feel like a real person with people relying on me. i'm calm and patient and maternal and witty. i'm really good at my job. my job is not only important but fundamental to the lives of my kids. i'm doing good in the world and enjoying doing it because they make it worth it. this is the best thing i could've done for my own life. i'll go back to academia eventually, but i'm so glad i took this path right now in my life.
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if you don’t celebrate anything today (like me) then happy sunday and a good monday 🥰 if you celebrate christmas i hope you have a good time and a happy holiday!! ☃️
if rn is a time where being with family is hard, i’m sending you strength. if rn is a time where money is tight and difficult, i’m sending you good fortune. if rn is a time where you feel alienated by those around you, i’m sending you support. if rn is not the time you can be happy, i’m sending you hugs.
whatever your situation is i hope the end of the year is a good one for you and that these next months bring kindness and good health ❤️
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