๐ ๐ก๐๐ญ๐ ๐ฐ๐ก๐๐ง ๐ฉ๐๐จ๐ฉ๐ฅ๐ ๐๐ฌ๐ค ๐ฆ๐ ๐ก๐จ๐ฐ ๐ ๐๐๐๐ฅ ๐๐๐๐๐ฎ๐ฌ๐ ๐ญ๐ก๐๐ง ๐ฆ๐ฒ ๐ฆ๐ข๐ง๐ ๐ ๐จ๐๐ฌ ๐ญ๐ก๐ซ๐จ๐ฎ๐ ๐ก ๐ญ๐ก๐ข๐ฌ ๐๐ง๐๐ฅ๐๐ฌ๐ฌ ๐ฏ๐จ๐ข๐ ๐จ๐ ๐๐ฆ๐จ๐ญ๐ข๐จ๐ง๐ฌ ๐๐ง๐ ๐'๐ฆ ๐๐ข๐ญ๐ก๐๐ซ ๐๐๐๐ฅ๐ข๐ง๐ ๐๐ฏ๐๐ซ๐ฒ๐ญ๐ก๐ข๐ง๐ ๐๐ญ ๐จ๐ง๐๐ ๐จ๐ซ ๐ง๐จ๐ญ๐ก๐ข๐ง๐ ๐๐ญ ๐๐ฅ๐ฅ ๐ฌ๐จ ๐ญ๐ก๐๐ง ๐ ๐ฃ๐ฎ๐ฌ๐ญ ๐๐ง๐ ๐ฎ๐ฉ ๐ฌ๐ก๐ซ๐ฎ๐ ๐ ๐ข๐ง๐ ๐๐ง๐ ๐ฌ๐๐ฒ๐ข๐ง๐
โ๐ ๐๐จ๐ง'๐ญ ๐ค๐ง๐จ๐ฐโ
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I feel numb. No tears, no anger, nothing. Just going through the same day again and again. I would rather just sleep without waking up.
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i have felt nothing but dread in my heart for the past 11 days. every morning, i check the death toll of my people. without fail, it has risen by at least 100. but today, i have truly broken. 500+ people and counting confirmed dead in one bombing. they cut off the food, water, and electricity for 2.2 million people, then attack our hospitals. hospitals that are full of the people injured from their previous bombings on civilian homes. doctors are discovering their families have died by those family members being rushed to their own hospital room.
i turn to the news to keep updated. i have stopped watching any western based news sources entirely since day 2. i get my reports straight from the palestinians on the ground. uncensored, brutal videos of children being maimed and parents crying over their dead babies. i read their final words and pleas to not be forgotten numbers. because if i turn on the news, those same people will be called terrorists for the crime of being born in gaza.
country doesn't matter anymore. a six year old in the usa is dead. germany has banned protesting the massacres. french police are harassing hijabis for speaking arabic. no palestinian is safe from violence or hate speech. i watch palestinain influencers be sent death threat after threat. i watch the instagram account for the state of israel make callout posts for palestinian model gigi hadid for mourning dead gazan kids.
there is no peace for the palestinian. birth has labeled us "human animals". we must witness the world co-sign our genocide. i feel nothing but anguish.
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Anyone else just feel insanely unlovable?
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Sitting here crying, and I wonder why the tears feel like sharp knives.
Everything else feels so numb.
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Morning losers๐
7:10am EST
Slept okay. Feeling kinda numb this morning after all the drama and shit that went down yesterday. Hoping today is a better dayโฆ
If I donโt reply to DMs quickly Iโm sorry but I will get to them tonight๐
I love you
Remember
You are loved
You are wanted
Take your meds
Drink your water
Be kind to yourself
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