#that we should be... cognizant of

[salt-baby]

gentle reminder that human health does not fit into a binary system and nothing is ever really fully a mental or physical disability

stress can have significant effects on physical health, more than you'd think

and the basis of any mental disability is still physical, that's why it's possible to develop medications for it

[easypeasylindyvesey]

also here’s another thing to all the fair-weathered fans out there:

real fans stay till the end of the game, even if they’re sitting on the couch (that’s me)

[myrfing]

me pulling out the you know im not a great patient myself it's a bother but sometimes we're not the best judges of our own condition on guys to get them to go to the hospital

[liedownquisition]

Hihi Helllo I have a response to the issue from Revek's timeline (which I brought up to them and they helped point out DC's own glaring issue that I then researched for this response lmao), and had personally forgotten what Batman #642-644 was so I'd like to clarify that: I'm pretty sure those issues actually precede UtH. It's supposed to be the final arc of the War Games plotline, which is generally agreed to fully precede UtH.

I assume you're referring to this panel?

To be honest... I think that's Willingham talking out his ass in messing up the timeline, because, well... War Games happened During the school year.

Like... not only was it very much Well After Tim's 16th birthday (July 19th), but it was also past JASON'S 18th birthday (August 16th, mentioned during War Drums/the prelude to War Games), & it was a whole thing that Tim's school was one of the only ones that hadn't been forced to close bcs of the gang war.

... The only think I can find that would tie any of this arc to the "summer" is the fact that Stephanie's brief run as Robin is published with cover dates from July-September 2004 (Actual release dates May-July 2004) a year prior to War Crimes with cover dates September-October 2005 (Actual Release July-August 2005).

(The rest of War Games, ftr, ran from October 2004-January 2005)

i dont accept the titans tower incident as canon, not for any jason apologist reason, but because genuinely im so fucking confused when it happened.

like obviously it cant be before UTRH, because jasons identity is known already.

during UTRH? youre telling me a budding crime lord who is constantly having to do shit in his area and keep up with all his insane plans has time to go all the way to san fran (roughly 5 hours by flight, MINIMUM), make enough preparations to infiltrate a damn superhero tower, beat a kid up, and head back home- all without compromising any work?? i mean sure i GUESS that can kinda sorta work????

after UTRH? there is absolutely no way that jason suffered grievous enough injury to Fucking Die, courtesy of his DAD, and was fine enough to fight tim. like even with comic book logic thats absolutely deranged recovery speed. and to my knowledge the teen titans issue was supposed to be set around UTRH time so it cant be that jason took the time to recover first and Then decided to fight a child.

like im being so fr ill accept jason slicing tims neck, ill accept him putting a batarang in tims stomach, ill accept him screwing dick over with pretending to be nightwing, ill accept whatever that bs plan involving the kids was that i still need to read about- because regardless of garbage characterization or Whatever, i still know when they happen. but titans tower incident?? titans tower incident???? i am sincerely asking WHEN THE FUCK DOES IT HAPPEN??????

[lastoneout]

TL;DR people with OCD do infact hyperanalyze every single thing we do or say or think to avoid being bad people, because being a bad person is literally our nightmare and we were born believing we're monsters and must spend our lives repenting for the crime of existing. Don't make it worse by telling someone that openly enjoying a hugely popular genre of art makes them suspicious and will stop them from making friends or being treated kindly unless they constantly repent in the form of saying they don't hate marginalized people. This shit is a nightmare for us, and again, you are hurting marginalized people in your quest to save them and that's really frustrating from the other side. If you care about people in your communities who have OCD you should be cognizant of what might make your spaces incredibly hostile for us. I already have my OCD telling me I'm a disgusting awful person who doesn't deserve to be treated like a human because I'll hurt everyone I love by accident, I don't need real people telling me they think my mental illness is right.

[xenosagaepisodeone]

during the summer at work we often get teens or young adults whose parents are forcing them to go door to door down the whole business strip to drop off resumes. we politely explain that we can't take physical applications and that they should just keep an eye on the website for any new job postings that come up. if the kid is alone, they'll normally understand but leave their resume anyway (which goes directly to shredding as per management instruction), but if they're with a parent it turns into a game of 20 questions of what positions are open, how to navigate the website, all kinds of poking and prodding about how to get in or get involved (with volunteering being something of interest but rarely followed up on 9 times out of 10), entirely lead by the parent. the parent is putting on a show for the kid to exhibit how job searching "is done" and the kind of tenacity that they think potential employers want to see in applicants. sometimes they'll resort to smalltalk or flattery in an attempt to leave a good impression, which would probably have some pull at a job with a smaller and more intimate staff or a high turnover rate, but means nothing in our closed and streamlined online application process overseen entirely by management. I sometimes try to give some advice re: job searching or next steps to make the conversation feel like less of a waste of time, but I can tell when a parent is feigning interest in my response because they haven't fully become cognizant of what is meant by "you have to apply online" and still believes that they're in the "sell yourself" phase of talking to a potential employer. when the parent and kid do the mandatory congenial smile and wave thing as they leave, i always look at the kid, awkward and embarrassed and on some level understanding that this is not working but following their parent to the next place anyway, and think "thank God I'm not young anymore"

[moonstruckme]

Hellooooo

Mae, could you maybe (absolutely no pressure or anything!!!) write something with Vampire!james x reader when he once again feeds from her and actually takes too much or so? Not like so much that it’s really bad or so but like too much, you know?

I haven’t thought about it a lot so I’m sorry that it’s so incomplete. The rest is yours to decide (as always)

(Sorry that my request is so messy, it’s the middle of the night for me)

Wasn't messy at all gorgeous! Thanks for requesting <3

cw: blood, lightheadedness/near fainting

vampire!James x fem!reader ♡ 682 words

You don’t notice it happening. You suppose that’s probably by design—vampires are supposed to drain their victims, after all, and that biology doesn’t account for your gentle boyfriend and his willing bloodbag. You’re not cognizant of any change between when your mind feels pleasantly fuzzy and when it starts to slip away from you altogether, dark spots blotting your vision and your bones losing their solidity. James notices, though, when you turn to mush in his hands. 

“Shit.” His voice is garbled by fang and slurred by gluttony, his arms encircling you to better prop you up. You feel a warm droplet of blood trudge down your front as he takes his mouth from you in a hurry. James swears again, wetting the wound to close it. “Shit, sweetheart, I’m sorry. Are you okay? Can you hear me?” 

You make some somnolent sound of reassurance, but it doesn’t seem to do its job well. James is panicky and upset, trying to calm himself enough to figure out what to do with you. 

“Okay.” He kisses your face, eyes watery. “I’m sorry. You’re okay. Let’s lay down, yeah? Come here.”

You’re not really up for following instructions, but James does the work himself, laying you sideways on the couch and propping your head on a pillow. 

“Stay awake, angel.” He lifts your legs some, holding your ankles in one hand while the other strokes up and down your leg soothingly. “Can you do that for me?” 

You hum. You’re feeling better already. It’s not like usual, where the fuzzy feeling starts to fade as soon as James takes his lips from you, but you’re beginning to feel more solid. “James, m’okay.” 

“I’m so sorry,” he says, voice hoarse with emotion. “How do you feel? Do you want some water?” 

“I feel better.” You take a deep breath, trying to steady yourself. “Just a little…a little weird. Hey. Jamie.” You cover his hand on your leg with yours. Your boyfriend’s expression looks tormented, his eyes glassy with self-loathing. “It’s okay, lovely. I’m fine, I just need a minute.” 

“I can’t believe I didn’t stop,” he admits in a near whisper. 

“I should have let you know.” 

“How were you supposed to? I was drinking you dry.” His voice thins. James closes his eyes, agonized. “I’m so sorry, sweetheart. That was dangerous. I could’ve killed you.” 

“You wouldn’t have,” you tell him gently. 

“I could have, I—” 

“James.” You sit up on your elbows. Your boyfriend’s brows bunch concernedly, but your head feels fine. Maybe your protectiveness of James is just more substantial than anything else in you. “You wouldn’t have, baby. Really. I know you’re worried you’re going to lose control or something, but that’s not what happened. We just both let it go a little too far. And when you realized what was happening, you stopped without even thinking about it.” You make your voice firm. “This was just a fluke. It was bound to happen at some point, but you’d never really hurt me. And everything turned out fine, right? Didn’t it?” 

James breathes out. “I don’t know,” he says uncertainly. “Are you fine?” 

“Yeah. I’m fine.” You give him a smile, reaching out your arms. 

James hugs you but doesn’t meet you halfway. He presses you back into the couch instead, his arms wound tight around your middle and stubble scritching against your cheek. 

“You promise you’re okay?” He turns his head to kiss your ear. “Be honest.” 

You rub his back. “I promise. I just needed a minute. It’s normal, you know?”

James sighs, his body sinking into yours. “Nothing about this is normal.” 

“I guess. But I was talking about, like, blood donation. This happens all the time in those cases.” You lie there for a minute, you soothing your palms over his back and him with his arms wrapped around you. “I feel fine to sit up now, by the way.” 

“No way.” James kisses the shell of your ear again. “You scared the shit out of me, baby. I’m never letting you up off this couch again.”

[honeyhotteoks]

just had the most delulu thought about yunho and wanted to share......... so i was watching protective!yunho compliations on tiktok trying to get his facial expressions and mannerisms right for something i'm writing, and a lot of these edits are like thirst traps over him looking serious/angry etc.

i was just reminded about how after isac when yunho was visibly upset with himself doing archery, he came on pm with atiny after and was surprised at how many people expressed that they liked when he looked angry. and the thing that i was absolutely obsessed with was first how surprised he was, but then second how quick he was to discourage fans from liking that side of him. he directly pointed out that people shouldn't want to see him angry, that they shouldn't like that part of him and he should be more careful to keep that in check in the future. but i've also noticed he enjoys teasing atiny when it comes to him getting jealous, especially lately like in lives when people brought up his brother or one of their handsome managers.

i think it's safe to say everyday that goes by this man is growing more and more into his potential for like true dom behavior. a man who's aware of what his anger or seriousness does to his partner but also is deeply cognizant that actual anger and actual aggression in a partner isn't something to admire? a man who enjoys playing with jealousy but keeps it light and keeps it teasing? truly i think as he gets older and grows more obviously confident and sure of himself (as we all do in our later twenties and beyond) i think these traits keep popping up that just translate so perfectly to real dom potential.

i'm not saying that he's actually pursuing or practicing any of this necessarily, i certainly think we're all much more chronically online and aware of kink subculture more than an idol in sk, but in the right circumstances i think he could really shine in that role with a partner and it makes me absolutely fucking dizzy. like you know, you KNOW he would be 10/10 at aftercare given how aware he is. everyone always writes him as the golden retriever happy go lucky puppy and to some extent he is.... but my god i am telling you behind the scenes this man is serious, he's working, he's focused, and he's extremely aware and self aware of what's going on around him.

i don't know maybe i'm in the delulu deep end or maybe i need @whatudowhennooneseesyou to confirm or deny based on this man's star chart but anyways yes have this headcanon

[inkdrinkerworld]

hi! maybe logan getting worried/protective over u after u get injured during a mission? 🥺🩷

Canon level (based on the comic books mostly) wounds and violence (it’s nothing too gory besides the wound description)

“Move out of my fucking way Scott,” you hear him before you see him which isn’t really a good sign.

You’d gone on a mission the same time he was out on one too, and though it had just been a simple recon mission, things got heated quick.

Zeitgeist was a bitch like usual, and you weren’t as fast as you might’ve been had there not been a falling child to save.

So now, your entire right side is rippled under the acid of his spit and you can’t deny the agony you’re in.

“She’s fine,” Scott says but you know your boyfriend.

He pushes past him and is at your side almost instantly. Your eyes take a moment to adjust to him being so close but when they settle on his face, the clear panic and worry is clear to see.

“I’m fine, Lo.” You say, teeth gritted through each word as Charles asses the wound.

You’re no longer in your suit, just in a pair of pants and a sports bra, your hair is drenched and Logan can only guess they just hosed you down to get rid of the majority of the acid.

It still burns like a bitch and you can’t hide that from the man who knows you so well.

“Bullshit,” he grumbles, hands brushing back the hair from your face. “Can’t you all do something instead of just fucking staring at it?”

The question is packed with worry that none of them are accustomed to seeing on Logan, but you swear you see Ororo smirk.

She’d been the only one to notice his soft underbelly- well beside you.

“We’re waiting for Hank to bring the antidote Logan,” you say gently, stroking his tense forearm. “I’m fine baby.”

It’s the ‘baby’ that softens him, that gets him to take a deep breath and press his forehead into yours.

“Fucking scared me,” he murmurs and the others all find themselves busy- besides Scott, he wants something to tease the man about as per the rules of their friendship. “Don’t do that shit again.” His hands are on your neck, thumbs under your chin so you can’t look away.

“I didn’t really have a choice, I had to save the kid.” He nods, pressing his lips to your temple. Hank saves him from blowing up again when you wince and the green acid bubbles a little more.

“Fucking finally, what took you so long?” He grunts, Hank only shaking his head as he pours the blue liquid over your wound.

“Fuck,” you cry out, hand itching to press against your side or slap Hank’s hands away but Logan stops you.

“Fucking say something next time, yeah big guy?” He growls but then you hiss again and he’s all focused on you again.

“You’re good, you’re okay bub.” It’s whispered straight into your hairline and if you were a little more cognizant you’d notice that Logan can’t stop glaring at the wound.

“We caught it in time, the antidote won’t reverse the burn completely, but it will be soothing it and fixing the majority of it.” Hank pulls on gloves, the snap of it on his wrist filling the room. “There’s a salve you need to put on it for the healing process.”

“Thanks Hank,” you whisper, much too tired for much else. “Can I go now?” Logan notices then how utterly exhausted you look and sets aside his anger and worry for a moment to dote on you.

“Yes, but Logan monitor the wound and how it heals over the next few weeks. The skin should be back to normal when the salve is done.” The professor says and Logan nods dutifully before picking you up off the med and taking the salve from Hank.

“C’mon, pretty girl.” He takes you back to your room and is smearing the salve on your side. “You’re not doing that shit again, I swear to whatever there is.”

You give him a small smile, “Getting hurt is part of it Logan, I can’t avoid that completely.”

He frowns and then presses a kiss right above your wounded side. “You don’t get how scary it is to hear, ‘she’s in the infirmary, an acid wound’, I nearly ripped Bobby in half.”

You stretch a hand to bury in his hair. “I know baby, but this was just a one time thing. Zeitgeist isn’t exactly unscathed either.”

Logan smiles, his lips pressing into your unblemished skin again. “Fire burns Logan, what can I say.”

“You’re fucking perfect, you know that?” You giggle a little, more so when he holds your cheeks and stamps a kiss to your lips. “Get some shut eye, m’gonna get one of the kids to make you soup.”

[readsaboutreid]

Fantasies (Part II) | S.R.

summary: Spencer and (Y/N) have been working back to back to back cases before finally getting a weekend off and take the opportunity to go to a local convention and have some fun cosplaying.

this is smutty smutty smut smut so 18+, minors dni please and thank you :)

contains: oral (m receiving), unprotected sex, roleplay, creampie

the first part can be found here (it's also 18+ and smut sorry but also not sorry)

also before any potential trekkies come for me yes i am aware that in the early to mid aughts Vulcan was a ridiculously hard language to learn but suspend your disbelief because the thirst for early series spencer reid is real for me okay?

any dialogue in italics is in Vulcan, any dialogue in regular text is in English :)

"You almost ready, (Y/N)?" Spencer asked through the door to the bathroom, knocking lightly as he did so. "Garcia is supposed to be here in 15 minutes so we have to make sure we're ready before then."

"Almost!" She called back, "just finishing up my makeup!"

Spencer took a look in the full-body mirror that she had resting up against the wall. He decided to cosplay as a generic original series star fleet science officer to keep it simple, but (Y/N) offered to help him put on some proper prosthetics so now he's a generic Vulcan science officer (with slightly less than Vulcan hair). He gently fiddled with the ears as he looked in the mirror and then jumped slightly as he felt a pair of small arms gently wrap around his waist from behind before he heard the soft, mellifluous voice of his girlfriend from over his shoulder.

"Don't do that too much," she chided him with a good natured chuckle, "I worked hard on applying those!"

"Sorry, angel," he offered a sheepish apology (complete with embarrassed smile), before turning around to face her and gently plant a kiss on her lips. She stood on her toes and moved her arms from around his waist and wrapped them around his shoulders. His arms snaked their way around her waist as he deepened the kiss, his tongue slipping into her mouth and dancing against her own.

Once they broke apart, Spencer took the chance to take in her own outfit. She looked much more convincing in her Vulcan cosplay with her natural hair concealed under a wig that was styled into a perfect chin-length bob, the front of it pushed back and tucked behind her prosthetic ears, and slightly curved bangs that were just long enough to cover the fact that she very much had human eyebrows. She had also decided to go with an Original Series cosplay, wearing a short blue star fleet dress with a translucent pair of black thigh high stockings. On her feet were a pair of black knee high leather boots with a small two-inch heel.

Spencer became aware of how uncomfortably tight his pants were starting to feel and cleared his throat, looking at literally anything else (he settled on keenly observing the books on his shelf, noting to himself that he should really get around to dusting at some point). He couldn't afford to be horny if they were going to be hanging out with Garcia and her friend for the day.

"You okay, there, Spencer?" The melodic giggle snapped him back to reality, and he could feel his face burn as his cheeks blushed a bright shade of red. He was painfully cognizant of the fact that her hands were now tracing along the waistband of his black pants, immediately nullifying his efforts to decrease his arousal. Her fingertips moved lower, ghosting over the bulge in the front.

Spencer let his mouth drop open before managing to stammer out, "(Y/N), we don't have enough time to—" his voice cut out as he gasped at the sudden sensation of her small, soft fingers slipping past the waistband of his pants and briefs, gently wrapping around his throbbing member.

"Well, Dr. Reid," she began slowly stroking up and down, earning a soft but enthusiastic whine from Spencer. He'd never tire of hearing her call him that. "It would seem you're in no position to be going anywhere quite yet. The most logical course of action would be to relieve you before the arrival of our companions, would it not?"

Holy shit. He had fantasized about roleplaying with her like this ever since she had brought it up a few months back. His knees buckled at the thought.

A moan forced its way through his lips as his hips bucked up into her hand. "You make a very sound argument, Dr. (Y/L/N), but I don't know if we have ti—oh my god yes!" She ran her thumb over the leaking tip, and then started to sink to her knees. She planted sloppy kisses along the waistband of his pants before working the fly on the front with deft and eager fingers. As soon as his cock was freed from its constraints her lips were wrapping around the tip. His fingers quickly tangled into her hair and he had to restrain himself from pushing her down onto him further as her tongue danced and swirled across him.

Thankfully she didn't make him wait for too long, her mouth starting to slowly envelop the rest of him until he could feel the tip hit the back of her throat. She gagged lightly and pulled back a little bit, bringing her hand up to wrap around the part of his shaft that didn't quit fit into her mouth and stroking it in rhythm with her bobbing head.

With a fresh burst of energy, Spencer moved his hips in time with her hand, his knees weakened by the desire coursing through his veins. He knew they didn't have much time left before Garcia and her friend arrived, but he couldn't bring himself to tell her to stop. He was lost in a world of pure sensation, her lips, her tongue, her hand, it was almost too much for him to bear.

As she increased the pace of her movements, his breath came in shallow gasps, trying to fight the urge to shout out her name. He could feel the tension growing within him, a storm brewing deep inside him.

(Y/N)'s lips moved up and down around his shaft, her tongue dancing along the sensitive skin as she took him deeper than he thought possible. He could feel her throat constricting around him, her saliva filling his mind with the images of her lips and the sound of her moaning as she pleasured him. He couldn't imagine anything more incredible, more fulfilling, than the sensation of (Y/N)'s lips and tongue on him, wrapped around him so intimately.

(Y/N), her eyes closed in concentration, sensed that he was nearing his climax. She increased the tempo of her movements, her hand and mouth in perfect harmony, matching the rhythm of his thrusts. Her eyes remained shut, fully immersed in the task at hand, completely unaware of the world outside of their bubble.

As the climax grew nearer, Spencer could feel his entire body trembling with the intensity of the sensation. His fingers tightened in her hair, gently urging her on as his cock throbbed with need. The room seemed to blur around them, their world shrinking down to just the two of them and the ecstasy that consumed them.

(Y/N) seemed to read his mind, picking up the pace even more as she continued to stroke his cock and suck his shaft with fervor. Her eyes remained closed, her focus completely on the task at hand. She knew that he was close, and she wanted to make sure he reached that peak of pleasure he so desperately craved. He could feel his orgasm building inside him, a storm of intensity that threatened to consume him whole.

And then, without warning, it hit him like a tidal wave. With a loud groan, Spencer's body convulsed as he released his load into (Y/N)'s mouth. She didn't hesitate, swallowing every drop, her eyes still closed as she continued to pleasure him until the very last drop.

The room was filled with the sound of heavy breathing. Spencer's body shook with aftershocks, his knees weak and legs trembling as he tried to catch his breath.

(Y/N) finally pulled her mouth away with a soft pop, a satisfied smile spreading across her face as she licked her lips and looked up at him sweetly, the sight making Spencer's heart race even more.

They were brought back to reality by the sound of a doorbell. (Y/N) shot to her feet and checked the mirror, attempting to straighten her hair by combing her fingers through it, before walking through the door and heading to the front door. As (Y/N) let in their friends Spencer could hear Penelope from the living room as she began laughing and said, "girl whatever you two were doing has left your hair a wreck!"

Spencer and (Y/N) sat at a small table with their giant soft pretzels, Garcia and her friend having wandered off to watch a panel. They both sat at the table, their feet aching slightly from walking around in the convention center. Spencer's pretzel sat forgotten in front of him, all of his focus on his girlfriend sitting across from him. Her face was slightly flushed from the warmth in the convention center, the heat from the crowds easily overpowering the AC running in the building. His eyes roamed from her cheeks to her breasts, straining against the fabric of her dress.

"Spencer?" (Y/N) waved a hand in front of his face, "anybody in there?" She gave another one of her trilling giggles and Spencer felt a small smile spread across his lips involuntarily at the sound. He slowly brought his eyes up to meet hers and his smile turned into a sheepish grin at the loving yet exasperated look she was giving him.

"Sorry, heh," Spencer chuckled nervously as his face burned with embarrassment at being caught blatantly ogling her chest in public.

She muttered as she shook her head. It took Spencer a second to realize why he couldn't figure it out until he asked her to repeat herself. "I said, 'men at conventions are all the same,' you silly, silly man," she smirked at him. His eyes went wide as she spoke Vulcan as fluently as any other language, and his heart skipped a beat. He was sure he'd lose consciousness with how quickly the blood rushed from his brain to his dick.

"Y-you speak Vulcan?" He responded, also speaking Vulcan, trying to hide his growing erection by crossing his legs.

A wicked grin spread across her lips. She took note of his shifting posture and his flushing face as she responded, "is there a problem, doctor? You're flushed and sweating."

"Have you finished your food?" Was his only response as he began gathering up his own trash and standing up. His breathing was slightly uneven and when he finally looked at her and met her eyes, she saw the raw need emanating from them.

Spencer could see her piece together what was going through his head and noticed as her smile took on a nearly feline quality. "Doctor, are you suffering from the Blood Fever?" She crooned as she, too, began gathering up her trash and belongings. Her movements were slow and leisurely, and as she stood she remarked in English that she should probably shoot a text to Garcia that they were headed out for the day. He stood by the table and leaned against it, casually slipping his hands into his pocket so he could adjust himself in his pants to conceal his raging boner.

She moved to stand a couple inches in front of him and looked up at him through her eyelashes and flashed him an innocent glance and a not-so-innocent smile. He throbbed in his pants and she reached for his hand and began leading him towards the exit.

The cab ride back to his apartment had been torture, to say the least. Spencer's cocked throbbed and ached the entire way and (Y/N) did nothing to help the situation, whispering things into his ear in Vulcan that he had never dreamt of anyone ever actually using the language to say while tracing lazy circles on his chest with her fingers.

He all but sprinted up the steps while pulling her by the hand behind him. He fumbled and dropped his keys as he attempted to unlock the door but quickly managed to get the door open and as soon as they were both inside his lips found hers. He kicked the door shut and began guiding her towards his bedroom while his hands found her waist. As they entered the room he tore his lips from hers and took the chance to take her in. Her pupils were blown wide, her lips were swollen and parted slightly, and her cheeks were flushed as she panted lightly.

His lips found hers again as he slowly began to guide her towards the bed, gently laying her down on the bed and crawling on top of her. His hips rested between her open thighs and his cock pressed up against her clothed pussy. He ground himself against her and both of them moaned at the friction.

"What of the Ritual, doctor?" She smirked up at him as he began trailing his kisses from her lips to her chin, then down to her neck. He bit down on a sensitive spot gently before soothing it with his tongue, earning a gasp from (Y/N) as her back arced off the bed.

"Forget the Ritual, I need to take you now," he moaned as he ground against her harder before pulling back to unfasten the button of his pants, followed by the zipper. He pushed his pants and briefs down just far enough to free his cock and hissed as the cool air of his room met with the aching flesh. When he looked back down at (Y/N) he noticed she had taken to opportunity to remove her own underwear and wasted no further time as he pressed himself back into her, groaning at the slickness that awaited him.

He positioned his cock at the entrance to her dripping cunt, nudging up against her gently. She whimpered and bucked her hips up, trying to push him into her. He began slowly pushing into her, inch by throbbing inch, until he was buried all the way into her. They both let out long, drawn out sounds of pure ecstasy. Spencer pulled out a couple inches and then pushed back in as (Y/N) hooked her ankles together behind him, her heels pressing into him. He maintained this pace as he leaned onto one arm, freeing up his other hand to reach in between them and start teasing her clit, pressing feverish kisses into her neck while he gently fucked her.

She moved her hips against his, her fingers digging into his shoulders as she panted and mewled underneath him. "How does it feel, (Y/N)?" He crooned into her ear, his breathing becoming ragged. He sped up his hips, earning a loud moan in response. "Come on, (Y/N), use your words."

"Harder, please," she whimpered, throwing her head back and crying out in pleasure as he obliged. He reared up above her, biting his lip and screwing his eyes shut as he felt himself racing towards his own climax. He opened his eyes right as she reached her hand between them to take over rubbing little circles onto her clit and nearly lost himself in the sight. Her dress was pushed up over her hips, her eyes fluttering back into her head, and her face and neck flushed a deep scarlet. His breathing grew rougher and more ragged and his thrusts became disjointed as he moaned louder and louder.

"Yes, please fill me doctor!" She cried, and Spencer finished with a shout in response, throwing his head back and stilling his hips as he came. (Y/N)'s own orgasm hit her like a ton of bricks, ripping through her body and making her pull him into her, melting into a single being of tangled limbs and desperate moans.

He panted above her, resting his forehead against her neck as he slowly pulled out of her and collapsed next to her on the bed. He turned to reach for the box of tissues he kept on his nightstand, cleaning himself up and handing allowing (Y/N) to clean herself up as well, before pulling his pants back up and pulling her into him, laying her head against his chest.

"We have to do this again," she giggled sleepily, rubbing lazy circles into his chest with her fingers. He nodded and kissed the top of her head, his eyelids heavy.

"I love you, (Y/N)," he mumbled as sleep finally began to take hold of him.

[drcomttheo]

MATTHEO RIDDLE x YN

summary: it is Halloween night and the Slytherins decided to throw a party. You and Mattheo (your boyfriend) decided to do a couples costume. He was going as a devil, and you were going as an angel; your outfit was revealing, white, and sheer. warnings: Possessive angst words: 1770 a/n: Slytherin Boy oneshots—ML Slytherin Boy oneshots—AO3

𝙷𝚊𝚕𝚕𝚘𝚠𝚎𝚎𝚗 𝚐𝚊𝚖𝚎

As Y/N stepped into the common room, a hush fell over the crowd, all their eyes drawn to their presence.

Mattheo was unable to contain himself as he sprang to his feet and hurried over, his gaze locked onto Y/N with an intensity that spoke volumes. 

His hands found their way to your hips; his touch was gentle and inviting.

As he drew you nearer, the intoxicating scent of his cologne enveloped you, leaving you breathless.

Mattheo's gaze lingered on you, a smile spreading across his face, his eyes dancing over your outfit with a blend of admiration and curiosity.

"Damn, sweetheart, you look absolutely stunning," Mattheo remarked, his eyes glinting with praise.

"Oh, I know I do," you replied, a mischievous glint in your eye as you winked playfully.

He chuckled as he gave your hips a playful squeeze.

"You've got every single guy in the room's attention; it's as if Christmas has come early, and you're the most desired gift," Mattheo remarked, a playful smirk dancing on his lips.

"Oh, do I really?" You ask as you cast a playful glance around, your eyes dancing with mischief.

He follows your gaze, his eyes narrowing as he spots several guys openly admiring you.

"You have no idea how difficult it's going to be for me to resist the urge to knock some of these jerks out for staring at you all night," he muttered, a protective fire igniting within him.

A soft giggle left your lips like a melody of amusement that danced in the air.

"Feeling a bit protective, are we?" You whispered softly, your fingers gliding gently up his arm, leaving a warm trail in their wake.

"Damn right, I am; you belong to me." 

He tightened his hold on your hips and drew you nearer; his breath was warm against your ear as he leaned in, ensuring his words are for you alone. "If one of these idiots makes a move on you, I'll have to remind them why you're mine."

A sly smile danced across your lips.

"Oh, is that a challenge I hear? Maybe I should go and have a word with a few of them," you say, very animated, trying to provoke a reaction from him.

His fingers instinctively tightened around your hips, a silent promise of his possession; all the while he tried to maintain a cool composure, his expression trying hard not to betray the storm brewing within.

His fingers instinctively tighten around your hips, a silent promise of strength, while his expression remains composed, betraying none of the tempest brewing within.

"Oh, really, babe? I'd love to see you try," he teased as he squeezed you closer.

"Mhm," you hum, a soft sound escaping your lips as you deftly shift his hands from your hips and with a confident smirk, you begin to saunter over to a random Slytherin.

"Not going to try and stop me?" you asked as you glanced back at Mattheo, your expression a mix of challenge and mischief.

He crossed his arms, leaning effortlessly against the wall, his gaze locked onto you with an intensity that sent shivers down your spine.

He bit down on his lip, a subtle gesture that sent a jolt of electricity through the air as he straightened his posture, the unspoken tension hanging thick between you.

"No, go on, show me what you've got, princess," he challenged, with a grin on his lips as he pointed toward the unsuspecting boy.

He was acutely aware of your intentions, and deep down, you were equally cognizant of the unspoken connection that lingered between you.

He was willing to participate in this game with you.

You approached the Slytherin; your fingers delicately traced the contours of your chest.

Mattheo's gaze lingered on you, a storm of irritation brewing within him as he observed your every move.

He could sense the playful tension and the way you were deliberately trying to push his buttons, and it was undeniably effective.

He observed the way the other Slytherin's gaze lingered on you, a quiet irritation simmering within him. 

He fought against the urge to stride over and reclaim you as his own. The buzz of anticipation crackled in the air as he watched, curiosity igniting within him, eager to find out just how far you would push this playful competition.

His gaze remained fixed on you, a magnetic pull drawing his attention as you leaned in closer to the other Slytherin, laughter escaping from your lips at something he had whispered.

You edged nearer to him, feigning the intent to share a secret in his ear, all the while anticipating the moment when Mattheo would finally lose his composure.

Mattheo's patience was wearing dangerously thin, his gaze sharpening as he observed you inching closer to the other Slytherin, a storm brewing in his chest. Every instinct within him urged him to step forward and to assert his desire and possessiveness over you.

Yet he held back, determined not to surrender to the tantalizing game you played—at least not just yet.

You glanced over your shoulder, catching sight of Mattheo, his expression a mix of irritation and intrigue.

He stood there, unwavering, and a spark of mischief ignited within you, urging you to escalate the tension between you two. Your fingers brushed against the stranger's cheek and slid into his hair, giving it a gentle tug.

That was sufficient to spark a flame in Mattheo's gaze. He propelled himself away from the wall, advancing toward you, his eyes fixated on your hand tangled in the boy's hair. He gritted his teeth, his knuckles paling as he tightened his grip into fists.

He navigated through the crowd with purpose, his gaze fixed on you while you engaged playfully with the other man. As he approached, he seized your hips, effortlessly spinning you to confront him; his gaze was a mix of darkness and undeniable possession, sending a shiver down your spine. 

"Is something wrong?" Your voice dripped with sultriness, wrapping around each word like a velvet ribbon.

He encircled your waist with a strong arm, drawing you close to him, his chest warm and solid against you. His eyes, fierce and smoldering, radiated a mix of jealousy and possessiveness.

"You know damn well what's wrong," he said, his voice laced with frustration.

"Finally decided to show up, did you?" you teased, fingers weaving through his hair with a playful touch.

"Oh, you were hoping for a reaction from me, weren't you, darling?" He leaned in, his breath warm against your ear, his voice a sultry whisper that sent shivers down your spine.

"You wanted to get me all riled up and jealous; well, you succeeded, princess," he declared, a smirk playing on his lips.

He drew you closer, enveloping you in his embrace, his hold on you both possessive and commanding.

"You're playing a dangerous game, darling, and you're going to have to face the consequences." He bent low, his lips crashing against yours in a passionate, possessive embrace, his fingers threading through your hair as he marked you as his in the gaze of all around.

He felt an undeniable urge to assert that you were his and his alone, a truth that resonated deep within him.

He deepened the kiss, his tongue seeking permission to explore as he pulled you even closer, the heat between you igniting with every heartbeat.

He was entirely focused on you and the annoying impact you were having on him, so he paid no attention to the surroundings.

He finally broke the kiss, yet held you close, his body radiating warmth as his eyes danced with a tempest of jealousy and longing. "You're mine," he murmured, his voice a sultry growl that sent shivers down your spine, before he leaned in, planting a delicate trail of kisses along your neck.

He pressed his lips against your neck, teasingly nipping and biting at your sensitive skin, claiming you as his own with each fervent touch. He felt a fierce need to assert his claim, ensuring that every gaze in the room acknowledged the undeniable truth: you were his and off-limits to all others. 

"Not here, Mattheo," you whispered, your cheeks flushing as your gaze darted nervously around the room.

He brushes aside your words, lost in the moment as his lips trail along your neck. His hand finds its way to your chin, gently guiding your face back to meet his gaze.

"It's too late to play coy now, love; you brought this on yourself."

He said, his gaze drifting down to your bare chest. "And this damn outfit you're wearing isn't helping the situation," he murmurs, a mix of frustration and desire lacing his voice.

His hand glides down to your hip, fingers dancing along the delicate fabric of your costume. "It's taking every ounce of my self-control not to rip this damn thing off you right here in front of everyone," he whispers, his voice low and filled with a tantalizing urgency.

"Come on," you urged, guiding him away from the crowd and into a secluded corner, where the world outside faded into a distant murmur.

He yields to your gentle insistence, allowing you to guide him back until you find yourselves in a hidden nook of the common room, away from prying eyes. Once you arrive, he whirls you around, pinning you against the wall, his body melding with yours in a heated embrace. 

"You're mine; do you understand? No one else is going to touch you or look at you the way I do."

He presses himself even tighter against you, his body molding to yours as he suckles and licks at the sensitive skin on your neck, leaving behind a trail of hickeys as he lays claim to you.

"Yes, sir," you whisper, breathless and eager.

With a low growl escaping his lips, he tightened his grip on your hips, drawing you in closer; the heat between you was palpable.

"Good girl," he mutters, his breath warm against your skin.

He pulls back just enough to admire the hickeys that bloom across your neck, a satisfied smirk playing on his lips. Then, with a fierce intensity, he leans in once more, capturing your lips in a kiss that speaks of possession and desire, igniting a fire deep within you.

[thewertsearch]

TG: ooof jake jake no please TG: this is a conversation that cant happen cause i started it and i blew it by saying stuff so u have to foroget it

Yeah, that tends to happen when you're shitfaced.

Impulsive though it was, Roxy's clumsy reference to Jane's crush probably stemmed from a genuine desire to help her out. Crocker is lovesick, and Roxy wants it to be resolved, one way or another, so that the poor girl can stop pining already.

GT: Ok but may i say this? TG: mrm? GT: If in the future i would like to bring up certain topics completely unsolicited by one who may be sworn to secrecy on those very matters… GT: And im in need of i guess neutral and totally non compromising advice from a friend do you think that miss zuipperpips might unseal those scandalous metal choppers for a bit?

I still can't tell if Jake knows about Roxy's crush. If he does, then this is a pretty cruel request to make. He's basically asking her to bury her own feelings, and facilitate his relationship with someone else instead.

I have a sneaking suspicion that he is aware, actually, because he's cognizant of the fact that this conversation could interfere with Jane and Roxy's friendship.

...yeah, I'm pretty sure you know what's up, Jake English. Why else would you think that asking Jane out would bother Roxy?

TG: im totals your bee eff effsy jake TG: i am like TG: AT PEACE with that reality fromerly known as a raw fuckin deal for what avenues it closes betewen u and i that bein your bffsy has got to mean but yeah GT: Wait what? TG: i am just chill as fuck about being a pale friend to all varieties of cute and eligible as hell peeps TG: do you see my shoulder and how it says hey friend plz deposit tears here? TG: that is a LEGIT invite and is like sincere as fuckin BANANAS

...and if he didn't know before, he definitely knows now.

This kid's life is getting very complicated, very fast - and if Roxy's bringing quadrants into the mix, then things are about to get hairy.

TG: and not that im back pebbling but what about your best bro TG: dont you get 2 talkin to him about girl troubles ever GT: Yeaaaah… GT: Well. GT: Like i said the whole thing is complicated. Best not to get into it all until im ready to you know… GT: Really start manhandling these bushel loads of prickly pears.

There's also the very real possibility that Jake's not into girls at all. He might be actively crushing on Bro, instead - or, he might think he's into Jane and/or Roxy, but is actually much further up the Kinsey Scale than he's realized. Maybe he feels that he should like girls, and his obsession with blue women is more of a performance of heterosexuality than the real deal.

If anything like that is going on, Jake's most ethical move is to declare to everyone involved that he's not ready for a relationship, and won't be until he understands his feelings a little better. The issue, of course, is that everyone involved is a hormonal teenager, so we can forget all about straightforward communication. This is going to be a mess.

TG: as an early wigglin day thing u know what ill do GT: I still dont really get the wiggling thing but no what? TG: ill enable the brobots novice setting again for you

Does Roxy know that that's the gay setting, or...?

[v-writes]

wip wednesday

Captured King snippet 2

part 1 part 3 ao3

Zatanna's wards had held Phantom unconscious for transport to the Watchtower, but would grow less reliable over time. The ghost shield the Justice League had been provided appeared to work during transport to the Watchtower, having had to be turned off and of again to pass through, but according to the GIW Phantom had a history of being able to get around them.

More reliable would be the custom restraints Zatanna had made, Phantom had stared at them in shock upon waking in the cell, before placing his shaking hands on the table he was cuffed to. Four custom sigils, two on each wrist, chained to a magically reinforced interrogation table.

Clark turned as Diana and Zatanna entered the observation room, each with a coffee in hand, "didn't bring a cup for Batman and I? I'm hurt."

"I know you are, I was there. And I hear the Medical Bay has its own private cafeteria and coffee pot."

Zatanna raises a perfect eyebrow, "do I look like a coffee gopher to you?"

"Ah, that's-"

Diana and Zatanna make eye contact, before laughing together, Diana leans pointedly on Clark as Zatanna asks "any updates?"

"Nothing solid," Clark sighs, "we thought we'd try talking to him individually to see if that changed how he responded, if he would be more open if he weren't outnumbered, but he just ignores us both, he'll look up to see who entered then go back to staring at his chains."

"That's not entirely true." Batman says.

"How could I forget, he flinched when I entered but not when Batman entered, anything else you want to add about his body language?"

"Hn."

Diana nods, "it makes sense, he has been in several fights with you, but not with Batman."

"Frankly I'm stunned the two of you thought could pull off unintimidating considering the past fights and your whole deal," she gestures to all of Batman, winking, "no offense Batsy."

"Hn."

"You think we should send in the one who put that bruise around his neck? Or the one who is responsible for his custom restraints?"

"Point taken. But I was actually thinking the Captain? You know, the one you used to get the drop on him? I saw the recordings, send him in as Billy and Phantom will talk."

"We aren't contacting Captain Marvel until school releases."

"Right. Middle of the night? No problem, what teenager has a sleep schedule anyway? But god forbid we interrupt Biology."

"It would be Language Arts at the moment actually."

"Why do you know that? Are you counting down until the school day ends?"

"Hn."

"Of course you are."

"You know," Wonder Woman starts carefully, "his cooperation with Captain Marvel isn't a guarantee, but there is another way."

Superman shrugs her arm off of his shoulder, "Wonder Woman-"

"Are we not in agreement about wanting information that does not come from the GIW themselves?" She gestures, lasso in hand, towards Phantom through the one way glass. "There information sits."

"Yes, but Diana-"

"It wouldn't be admissible in court."

Diana looks between Superman and Batman for a moment before sighing. "Politics."

"This isn't an alien invasion," Superman placates, "we need to be cognizant of how we handle this, not just that we handle this."

"I know, I know, as I said, 'politics'. That he can, or rather, has flattened a building with a yell and gone toe to toe with us makes him our business, but we aren't the USA's dogs"

The door to the observation room opens, Batman's eyes narrowing behind the cowl, "you're supposed to be in class."

"You thought I would listen to you and go to school after last night? How are you surprised, don't you have kids?" Captain Marvel does not even attempt to look ashamed.

"He really has no excuse, they don't listen to him either," Red Hood, sans signature red helmet enters, a domino in its place, and a manila folder in his hand.

Red Robin follows him, "he doesn't even have custody of me, but don't tell him that, he likes to pretend."

"This is a restricted access area, associated with a classified investigation."

"Nope." Red Hood steps to stand in front of Batman, taking the lead of the new trio to enter.

"Excuse me?"

"It's our investigation now old man."

"That's not your call to make-"

The computer terminal activates, lighting the room in green Oracle's symbol takes over the screen, static clicks over the Justice League communicators and computer speakers before Oracle's voice, computerized and clear comes over them.

"And he didn't make it, I did. And we've been busy."

Captain Marvel smiles, stubbornly bright, "I emailed her after you tried to bench me. You would not believe the stuff you can find on the GIW when you don't respect the government. Here's a flash drive from Oracle, I've had a lot of fun, and come to the conclusion that she's terrifying."

Red Robin snickers, "did you need the wisdom of Solomon to figure that out?"

"O, the Watchtower servers are on a closed network."

"I thought we were past you underestimating me? The drive is more for general JL use, I've already uploaded copies to our servers."

"I'm referring to the guests you gave Zeta access to."

"Oh that wasn't me."

"That was my idea," Captain marvel scratches the back of his head bashfully, not making eye contact with Batman, but not apologizing either.

"Without prior notice or Trinity approval?"

Diana takes a long sip of her coffee. "While I am neither 'the World's Greatest Detective', nor an investigative journalist, I have picked up how to best get around certain 'politics' issues. For what it's worth, Oracle was already on the case when I reached out to her."

"Speaking of ways around politics," Red hood steps towards the door to the interrogation room, Superman starts to move towards him, but stops when Wonder Woman puts a hand on his shoulder. "While you lot have been keeping your hands clean, we've been doing actual work-"

"In fact Oracle is still working."

"Yes, thank you O, you're amazing and their servers are weird, Red Robin can handle filling you lot in, I'm gonna go get Phantom to open up."

Red Hood slams the door open, Phantom's gaze snaps to him, eyes narrowing, "yo Danny!"

[beuxwhoyouare]

Bewildering

The Skreat escape pod crash landing on Earth one night caused chaos in more ways than one. Several people’s lives were altered forever by the events that immediately followed the ships blazing destruction. It was dark as sirens blared through the night heading towards the blaze.

I woke up by the shrieking sounds of alarms approaching. We crashed on some foreign planet after the sudden attack. My biggest fear was being captured on this planet, what if they were the ones that attacked us? What if they took me and tortured me for species secrets. I couldn't let them know about Skreats and began slithering as fast as I could through the area lined with bark lined towers.

2 figures approached in the night, but I couldn't focus on identifying features and chose to hide. Suctioning my way up a bark tower, I chose to use my observation skills to determine if they were friendly organisms or foes determined to take me in for experimentation.

"Raph I don't think we should get closer. We should go back to camp and evacuate. It looks like it could lead to a big wild fire," the shorter of the two pleaded with the bigger one.

"Alex, dude. There's no way it wasn't like a giant secret ship or something insane that caused it. Didn't you hear that crazy crash? We gotta see this thing first hand," the taller and much more statured of the two said with a boomy resonance.

The two were going towards the ship crash at a rate faster than I could slithering on this planets gravitational pull. I decided they were my way to observe the site and get there faster. I dropped my suction and aimed to fall on their bags. After detaching, I aimed to fall on the broader one since it seemed like my size would be negligible on him.

After falling onto his bag, he turned around as if he heard something behind him, but by that point I had slid into an opening on the enclosure. We Skreats are very pliable and I made my way into his bag.

The pair of earthlings made their way closer to the ships crash site but by the time they got there bright lights and tape marked off the region. Curiosity struck many trying to get a sight at the alien ship. I peaked out of the bag only to see the blaze. There’s no way any Skreats could have survived such a blast.

Numb. All I felt was numbness as this earthling unknowingly carried me away from the scene. Was I the last Skreat? How does one internalize the idea that you’re the last of your kind? The bag shook and then got flung onto a nearby soft surface after a loud door shut. I flew inside the bag which rocked me back to cognizance. Where am I now? I peaked out of the fabric cage I resided in and saw the taller one walking around a room.

He peered into a doorway that emanated light before pulling out a round red sphere and taking a bite.

He appeared to be preparing earthen sustenance…I should become more accustomed to this if I’m the last Skreat I’ll need to blend in with the earthlings. I left the soft seat the bag was thrown onto and slid my way closer to get a better look.

He threw things into a hot cauldron item over a flame. After a few time sectors he was done and put some of the substance into a bowl, that’s when I lost my grip on some steam and fell into the bowl when he wasn’t aware.

I hid among orange, green, and tan bits of sustenance in the hot salty broth. I stung but I couldn’t risk being caught. Eventually a colder metallic platform came into the bowl and lifted me up to his front facing orifice, despite my protests I got swallowed again without his notice.

I refused to be defeated. I mustered up the energy and detoured before meeting the earthlings digestive acids and headed to his core. I guess you call it a heart.

Once there, I began inserting my tendrils and began spreading myself through his bloodstream. It’s a large task for such a small Skreat like myself to attempt a takeover of a creature this large but I was desperate to live.

The large creature began to notice and clasped hard at his chest. But it was too late for him. Pulse pulse pulse. I could feel his heart pumping and eventually I synced up with it. We were becoming one. It’s a skill of the Skreats but it was my first time doing it. I was scared to do it wrong or worse…kill the host.

I began trying to use my new lungs. A phenomenon that like sounds like gasping for air from those who normally use lungs. Eventually I calmed down and brought the heart pulsing down to a normal seeming speed. All the internal systems seemed to normalize as I calmed the body down.

Except one part of the sizable earthling….

I used the body’s messaging device to take an image for further research later. Then I continued to calm the body down leading the appendage to become more restrained. But a message appeared from someone named Babe. I opened it up to see a slimmer earthling with longer hair. They appeared unclothed with a message saying “can i come over?” I replied with my new fingers “affirmative”.

I continued to try enjoying the sustenance the human made before. Wow these sensations from my new mouth were so vibrant and exhilarating. I wonder what else I can figure out. My new thick fingers fiddled with the bag I came out of nearby. An item flopped out with a bunch of cards, I picked up one with this bodies image.

Raphael James Conrad Lee. Was that his identification? That seems very long and superfluous. Must be why that other human called him Raph before.

A knock came to the door of the housing unit I was in. I approached the door and instead of investigating almost as if the host was on autopilot it turned the knob and a tiny earthling stood there in a see through top piece of clothing and a frilly bottom one. I believe this must be the opposite gender, a woman.

She lunged at me piloting the host and placed her mouth on to mine introducing her anatomy to mine. I reciprocated before she yanked my bottom clothing down. My previously hard appendage revived itself with a mind of its own as the woman placed her mouth on it.

All I saw was her eyes as she moved swiftly. One she placed her mouth on it, it felt like all I could see was colors. Oh my what is this phenomenon. Ohhhhh unhhhhhh. What are these sounds escaping my mouth. Before I knew it, the feeling became overwhelming. I felt something coming. My hosts feet previously firmly planted on the ground, curled its toes. My abdomen contracted and then a RELEASE. I opened my eyes as she wiped something. She placed her mouth on mine again and said “thanks”. Before immediately fleeing.

What was that? What is this experience. And why does it feel so good?

I need to understand more about what this appendage does. I wonder if that tiny male human that was with “me” earlier might want to do the same activities with his appendages. I try to recall his identification. Cmon I knew I heard him say it. Lex, Ale, Alex….Alex? Yes.

I picked up the messaging device and snapped an image. I copied the text the woman sent me. “Come over”. Maybe that’s how humans that want that activity communicate it to one another.

Almost immediately the device buzzed.

“Oh bro I didn’t know you rolled like that too?”

What do these words mean? I don’t want him to out me for acting outlandish…okay I can do this.

“Yeah bro. So are you cuming?”

A hand with a thumbs up appeared above the message appeared? What does this mean? So much to learn about this planet. I better start learning if I want to blend in.

The door was never closed after the woman left and a one pound happened on the already opened door. Before I could approach it to see who it was. Alex was there at the door. I could see the same energy the woman had in his eyes. He slammed the door behind him and unclothed himself with haste. He also had an appendage hard like mine, but smaller. Was my body considered an alpha amongst men?

He approached with eagerness but also a tenderness, unlike the woman. I put my mouth on his like she did to me. I was about to show Alex everything I’ve learned about earthlings.

[bahablastplz]

Cosmic Love: Chan x Reader x Felix

A night at the club turns into a lot more than you anticipated, all thanks to a stupid text that you don't even remember sending. The next day, Chan and Felix invite you over for dinner. That's all it is, right? Content: Smut, minor angst, fluff Warnings: Use of petnames 'love,' and 'babygirl,' threesome, fingering, oral (f! and m! receiving), p in v sex, lots of praise, spanking (barely), humiliation/second hand embarrassment WC: 4700

It starts like this: 

Chan texts you the morning after you go to the club. Of course, you’re hungover out of your mind, but that’s to be expected. On Saturday morning, or afternoon you suppose, you roll out of bed with a loud groan, a pulsing headache making its way behind your eyes. 

You notice that your makeup has been removed and you’re now sporting clothes much comfier than your dress and heels that were suffocating you last night at the club. Your phone is also plugged in, and you have been notorious for waking up with a dead phone the morning after waking up from a night out. 

You have half the mind to wonder, how the hell were you cognizant enough last night to do all of this? You certainly don’t remember it. It all makes sense when you check your notifications, screen a little too bright for your liking, and see that Chan had texted you an hour ago. 

Channie: Hey babygirl  I don’t know if you remember, but Felix and I brought you home last night~  You were pretty fucked up haha  If you’re feeling up to it, you want to join us for dinner tonight at my place?  Me you and Lix  Hope you’re feeling okay this morning. Let us know if you need anything, yeah? 

You groan. Of course Chan and Felix brought you home last night, that makes so much more sense. Chan has always been a natural caretaker, and if he was at the club last night and you tried to go home with some random guy or even take an Uber, he surely would have become overprotective and offered to take you home himself. 

Your heart pangs when you read the text again. Babygirl. The pet name makes it easy to remember the major crush you’ve been harboring for him for forever. Him and Felix both, honestly. You really really hope you didn’t say anything embarrassing last night that you can’t remember. That would be just your luck, honestly. Taking a deep breath, you make a note to take some Advil as you text him back. 

Y/N: Thanks so much  I’ll be there! Can’t wait 

He texts you back almost instantly: 

Channie:  Sick  We’re super excited 

A red flag should have raised over the fact that, though him and Felix were your closest friends, they almost never invited you over to their place. They almost always come over to yours when you hang out, and hangouts usually happen more organically. You brush the thought aside, chalking it up to Chan’s protective nature and need to make sure you’re okay after what was likely a rough night out. 

That’s all it is, right? 

You’re only giddy because of this stupid crush on your friends you can’t quite push away. There’s not anything more going on and there’s no lines to read between. You repeat this like a mantra as you get ready tonight, putting on just a little bit of makeup (for no reason in particular!!!), and repeat it once more as you knock on Chan’s door, bottle of wine in hand. 

He opens the door with a large smile, all teeth, that makes your heart beat a little faster. When you hand him the bottle of wine you’re met with a hearty laugh. “You sure you didn’t have enough of this last night?” he teases. You shove his chest lightly, giving him a devilish grin.

“What if I brought it for you?” You quip back. 

“I think we were imagining a type of fun that didn’t involve alcohol.” You give him a smile at his words, brows furrowing for a second before brushing off his words. He probably just means they intend to stay sober tonight. You’ve had plenty of nights that were fun that didn’t involve alcohol, so that’s all he meant by his words! Shrugging, you put the wine in the fridge instead of cracking it open, taking his advice to save the drink for another day. 

Dinner is amazing. Chan made it with Felix’s observation, as according to Chan the other shouldn’t be allowed in the kitchen ever again. You laugh as he dives into several stories of baking incidents gone wrong, including a time that Felix and Seungmin ended up burning everything they made. You defend your friend, telling Chan that Felix ‘does make killer brownies,’ which the other can’t argue with. It’s decided that Felix should do most of his cooking alone, as anytime he cooks with anybody else it ends up in a minor disaster. Felix looks thoroughly flushed and embarrassed by the end of your conversation so the two of you relent on your teasing. 

You decide on a movie. It’s not even really that entertaining and you’re barely paying attention if you’re being honest. It’s some movie you’d seen a hundred times before. You find your place between Chan and Felix, your body squished between your two friends. You nuzzle your head into Chan’s shoulder and prop your legs up onto Felix. You’re comfortable, very much so, though you tense for a second when you feel Felix’s hand rest on your thigh. You can also feel Chan’s breath on your neck, and you suddenly feel hot. Very hot. 

You hope they can’t feel how warm to the touch you’ve become, and at such a simple action at that. Are you really that pathetic? God, your crush on them has gotten out of hand, you think, but when Felix’s hand raises further up your thigh and starts rubbing teasing circles you’re not so sure this is all in your head anymore. Chan has always been touchy with you and Felix moreso, but this is just a little bit out of character for them. You’re worried to speak up for a second, scared that your words would make Felix retract his hand. When he looks up at you with an inquisitorial gaze, however, you can’t help the words that spill from your mouth. “Lix–” 

You’re not prepared for the words that come from the man behind you. 

“Tell me, Y/N,” Chan says lowly. “Do you want me to fuck you nice and hard?” He punctuates his words and your body physically tenses. Your world has come to a full stop. 

“What?” 

“Do you want me to–” 

“I… I heard you,” you interrupt. “I’m just… I’m not quite sure what you mean.” You feel afraid to look up at Chan from behind you, and you certainly don’t look at Felix; though his hand has stilled, it still rests firmly on your thigh. 

“I don’t know if you remember this,” Chan says. His demeanor has changed, and you’re met with a chuckle and a deep breath. He seems very shy compared to the man just seconds ago speaking into your ear. “Last night when you were at the club, you texted me and Lix in a group chat.” 

Fuck. 

That makes so much more sense, you think. No way would you have gotten that fucked up without doing something you would regret. You reach for your phone but a hand rests on top of yours, stilling your movement. 

“No, it’s okay,” he says in response to your panic. “I already have it pulled up. I was thinking I could read it to you.” 

“Chan, I’m sorry, I’m sure I didn’t–” 

He shushes you. For some reason sparks shoot up your spine at the action. You purse your lips shut, an action that implies your silence and you wait for him to continue. 

“Last night you were dancing with us,” he starts. “You were drunk out of your mind. I think you knew that already. But you texted Lix and I, and we could just tell you had enough to drink so we offered to take you home. But while we were in the car,” he laughs lightly. You don’t feel like laughing back, “While we were in the car, you texted us. It wasn’t meant for us, but you told us some things that you wanted us to, um, do to you.” 

“That’s not the worst part,” Felix provides unhelpfully. You glare at the man and he smiles sweetly. “Chris’ phone was connected to bluetooth and it read your texts out loud in the car.” 

You groan. Thank God you were drunk enough last night to not remember that because you’re not sure you can even relive the memory. In fact, even now you wish for the world to split open and swallow you whole. 

“Emmaaaaa,” Chan starts, reading your texts out loud in a voice that is obviously meant to resemble your own. You realize now that the text was meant for your best friend, the one that you use to hopelessly rant to about your strong unrequited crush for the two boys in question. 

“God they’re so finee  I want Channie and Lixie so bad fr  I just want them to ruin me  You know I’ve never been fucked right but I want Chan to just fuck me nice and hard ughhshh  I know you’re so tired of hearing me talk about this  But he’s so perfect I just know he could fuck me up sooo good  And Felix? I just want him to whisper filthy things in my ears With his perfect voice  He looks like such an angel I just want to see what he’s really like, if he’ll fuck me soft or nice and hard like Channie  I need them both to ruin me!!!! You don’t understand If I don’t get someone’s cock in my mouth–” 

“Oh my god that’s enough,” you interrupt. You’re not sure you can listen to another second of past-you embarrassing yourself, and you tell him as much when you shoot out of his grasp and turn around to look at him. He has a sly fucking grin on his mouth and you can’t help but feel like you’re the butt of a joke you didn’t ask to be a part of. “I… I can’t listen to you embarrass me anymore. I’m so sorry about what I said and I really didn’t mean to make you uncomfortable. Hell, you know I don’t even remember it, and I know that really doesn’t excuse it but I hope you know I never wanted to ruin our friendship. I know you guys don’t feel the same way so if you want, I can go and–” 

Chan puts his hands around your shoulders, halting your movements when you try to stand. 

“Woah woah woah, babygirl,” he says, trying to interrupt your sad attempt at salvaging your relationship. “It’s not what you think, actually. You could never ruin your friendship with us, okay?” You feel tears prick at your eyes, truly humiliated with how the night has progressed. Even now, Chan is here trying to be nice to you so you won’t feel bad about what happened which is somehow even more humiliating. 

“Did you really mean what you said?” Felix says, finally. 

“Can I even take it back now?” you say, laughing sardonically. “You know, drunk actions are sober thoughts, or whatever they say? I’m so sorry, again. Like I said, if you want me to leave I can.” Your eyes flit between Felix and Chan, gauging for a reaction, any sense that they may be uncomfortable with your actions. You’re surprised to find none. 

“If you really meant it,” Chan says, inhaling through his teeth and clicking his tongue on the roof of his mouth, “Then we kind of had a proposal for you.” 

“What kind of proposal?” you ask suspiciously. 

“The kind where maybe we have sex? All three of us,” he suggests. 

What. 

What?

“What!?” Your brain supplies the only word it can think of. This is a joke, right? Your feelings that have been unrequited for so long are being reciprocated this casually? You stare blankly at the two men who are waiting for some sort of response. 

“I… I’m not sure if I can,” you answer finally. Though everything in your body is telling you yes yes yes, the arousal already pooling in between your legs, your brain finally seems to be the one in the forefront making the decisions. “I can’t do that, have ‘just sex’ with you. Either of you. And maybe I’m about to make a fool of myself even more tonight, but I have to admit that my feelings for you both run a lot deeper than just… sexual.” You let out a heavy sigh when you finally admit the truth. “I’m scared that I won’t be able to detach my emotions from it all, and I really don’t want to ruin what we have going on.” 

You’re met with silence and you open your eyes but don’t look at either of them, instead opting to look at the floor. Did Chan get a new carpet? It looks really nice–

“I don’t think it would be ‘just sex,’ babygirl.” Chan and that goddamned pet name that makes your heart flutter. “We’ve, uh, both liked you for a very long time. And we want this to go further, if you’re interested of course.” 

For the second time in one night, you feel as if the world has tilted on its axis. Maybe it has, because you feel a little bit dizzier now and your heart beats a little bit faster than it did just seconds ago. 

“Are you sure?” you ask, worrying your lip between your teeth. Felix takes his thumb and pulls your lip out from between your teeth, his thumb lingering for a second before pushing into your mouth. Your eyes close and your tongue swirls around the appendage. 

“Do you want this, love?” The deep timbre of his voice sends shivers down your spine and your eyes open, meeting his gaze. For a second, it feels as if nothing but you and Felix exist in this entire world, and you ponder his words for a second. If they really mean it and they have both liked you for a while now, you don’t have to worry about separating feelings from sex. You ponder what this means for your relationships going forward for a second but the pulsing need between your legs and the way your breath hitches when his thumb pushes further into your mouth tells you all you need to know. You want this. You nod your head and know it’s the right choice when you’re met with a reassuring smile. 

“If you’re sure, then we’re sure,” Chan says from beside you. You feel his fingers on your leg, veiny hands rubbing small circles on the expanse of your thigh. When he grips the plush of your thigh hard you can’t help the gasp that comes from your mouth, and Felix’s thumb releases from your mouth, wet with your saliva. You feel his hand come to rest on your face as he caresses you softly, brushing a stray hair away from your face as he leans in to kiss you. 

You breathe into the kiss but let him take the lead, soft and plush lips delicate against your own. When his tongue barely brushes your bottom lip you’re already opening your mouth for him eagerly, letting his tongue come into contact with yours. The kiss is passionate but almost too romantic for what you’re about to let him do to you. When you moan into the kiss he deepens it, hands pulling your face even closer to his own. 

You note the movement on the couch next to you and Chan taps your shoulder. When you turn your head to look at him he’s crashing his lips into yours in a bruising kiss, messy and desperate and it catches you off guard but you return his advances eagerly, lips and tongue moving expertly against one anothers. 

Felix’s hand comes and snakes around your waist, stopping your kiss just long enough to lift your shirt over your head. His warm breath hits your neck and it’s all you can focus on besides Chan’s wet tongue against yours, but then Felix’s fingers rub your nipples over the fabric of your bra and you’re keening backwards into his touch, running away while simultaneously trying to get more at the same time. 

When Chan finally breaks the kiss it’s with a groan and a long string of saliva connects you, wet and dirty. He sits back and admires the work that Felix is doing, having you come completely undone for him with just his fingers against your still clothed breasts. It’s Chan that reaches and unclasps your bra, leaving you utterly exposed in front of the two men in front of you and he wastes no time before joining Felix in his ministrations. 

The teasing becomes too much, tongue and teeth and pinching over your abused breasts, and at this point you’re not sure how much more squeezing of your thighs together you can do before it comes to much. 

“Please,” you breathe, and you’re not even quite sure what you’re asking for. 

“Please what, babygirl?” Chan coos at you, words laced with a teasing lilt. You reach forward and grab his hand and it’s like your breath stops when you place his hand right between your legs where you need him the most. “Want me to touch you?” He asks. His breathing is heavy and you admire his attempt at trying to keep his composure. 

“Yes, please,” you nod, eyes never leaving his. Not even when his hand cups your clothed pussy and you buck up into him with a cry. Felix shifts from behind you and pulls your back into his chest as Chan reaches down to pull down your shorts with one swift motion. 

You’re completely bare for them now, and you have little time to dwell on this fact before Felix grabs your legs and spreads them open, hooking them over his own. His hands rest on your thighs, holding you into place and giving Chan access to your sopping core. 

“God, babygirl you’re soaked,” Chan notes, two fingers swiping in between your folds. You can hear it, the wetness pooled between your legs, but when he leans his face forward and meets his tongue with your clit you can’t help the surprise that creeps from your throat. 

He’s relentless, his tongue flicking and circling your clit mercilessly. Your legs shake and try to close but are held open by Felix’s own. 

You look up at the man behind you with teary eyes and open mouth, thinking about asking him to give you mercy but the expression on his face tells you all you need to know. He’s enjoying this just as much as Chan is. 

“Does that feel good?” he asks into your ear. 

“Yes, oh my god,” you tell him as his lips come down to meet yours in a short peck. They ultimately land on your neck, nipping at the junction between your neck and ear. 

“Tell me how good,” he instructs. “Tell me how good he’s making you feel.” 

“So good, Felix, oh,” you moan. Two of Chan’s fingers thrust into you, in motion with the way that his tongue abuses your clit and it’s already too much. “God, Felix, he’s making me feel so good. He’s… He’s eating me out so good, his tongue feels…oh my–” you know you’re babbling but you can’t help the moan that interrupts your words. Felix shushes you, and you think his hands are going to find place in your hair to soothe you but instead they make way to your breasts, still sensitive from just minutes prior. 

His thumb and pointer finger pinch your nipples between his fingers, tugging and twisting them. Your back arches at his touch and your skin prickles at his low voice in your ear. 

“You’re doing so, so good for us, love. Fuck, you’re being so good letting Channie eat your pussy like that,” he says. One hand comes to grab the flesh at your hip, kneading it as he continues to tease your pebbled nipple between his fingers. “Do you like being good for us?” 

“Yes, fuck, fuck, I like being good for you,” you cry out. “Love it so much, oh my god–” and as Chan’s fingers curl up inside of you, you find your orgasm being ripped out of you with no warning. You’re cumming hard around his fingers, pulsing tightly as he lets you ride out your high on his face. Behind you Felix takes to setting a slow pace in rubbing his hands up and down your body, grounding you with his touch as he whispers praises in your ears. 

When you finally open your eyes again, you truly feel like you have woken up in a different dimension. 

“Holy fuck–” you rasp, noting when Felix wipes a tear from your eyes you hadn’t realized you had shed. 

“Do you think you can take us, babygirl?” Chan asks as he pulls his fingers from your center. He reaches across your body to offer his soaking fingers to Felix, who eagerly takes them in his mouth for the chance to taste you. You don’t miss the way he moans around Chan’s fingers. 

“Yes,” you say softly. “Want you both.” 

Felix reaches down and kisses you, much more comfortable this time with the way that he allows himself to be rougher with you, pushing his tongue into your mouth with a boldness that was lacking earlier. When you pull apart you notice the large hands on your waist that aren’t his and you’re being flipped around by Chan before you can process it. Your ass is up in the air and you’re on all fours now, squeaking when Chan lands a quick hit to your ass and kneads the flesh. 

When you tilt your head up to look at Felix you notice him pulling his pants and boxers down past his thighs, letting his cock spring free and resting at your face. He taps it against your cheek and he looks down at you, silently checking to make sure  you’re okay. Looking up at him with bright wide eyes you blink, asking him for permission as you open your mouth wide for him. 

He pushes in with a groan, letting his cock rest on your tongue for a second. You suckle on his tip and let your tongue swirl around his head, watching how reactive he is with amusement. Even though you haven’t fully started sucking him off yet he is breathy, eyes dark in the way he looks at you and strokes your hair. 

He pushes his length further into your mouth and you groan, taking him fully. He sets the pace, slow and languid, pulling his cock fully out of your mouth before shoving it back in with expertise. 

You barely register the hands behind you that grab your ass until you feel Chan’s tip prodding at your entrance, barely pushing inside you. You let out a shaky breath around Felix and Chan takes that as a sign to push into you fully. 

The stretch is welcoming. Your jaw goes slack as you take a moment to process the protrusion, clenching tightly around him as he stills. Felix uses your mouth now, setting the rhythm for the man behind you as well. Relaxing, you let yourself be used by both of the men. You feel Chan’s thighs smack the back of yours, wet and messy and relentless. This causes you to jerk forward, pushing you back and forth onto Felix’s cock. Chan’s hands press into your hips, desperate and harsh and sure to leave bruises in its wake.

“God, love, your mouth,” Felix moans. His hand in your hair is soft in its caresses, contradictory from the way his hips snap into your face ruthlessly. “You’re doing so fucking good for us, baby. This is what you wanted, isn’t it? For Chan to fuck you nice and hard, yeah? For me to whisper filthy things in your ear?” 

You do what you can to nod your head, though it’s pathetic with the way your mouth is full of him. You know you look utterly debauched, absolutely used from the two men you’ve found yourself in between. The mascara you applied before is running down your face along with tears of pleasure, and you find yourself continuously blinking them away to look up at Felix. Your hands find place on the bed beside you, fingers curling into the sheets. You’re close, incredibly so, and you know it’s not much longer until you come over the edge. 

Felix lets out a low groan and you feel his cock twitch in your mouth. With a sharp grasp on your hair he spills into your mouth, right down your throat in hot spurts. You swallow around him thickly and he pulls out, wiping a bit of spit off of your mouth with his thumb. 

You fall forward into Felix’s lap, arching your back in order to give Chan full access to your dripping hole. He takes full advantage of it, fucking into you with reckless abandon. Now that your mouth is free, you have full opportunity to speak–though, the only thing that comes out of your mouth now are loud moans and broken, choked sobs. 

“Chan, fuck, oh my, I’m gonna cum, fuck I’m gonna come–” you babble. 

“Sweet girl, is he fucking you stupid?” Felix asks, wrapping his arms around you and making you look into his eyes. When you meet his gaze you nod your head sporadically. 

Chan grunts from behind you, his hips starting to stutter. “Fuck, Lix. I’m close,” he warns. “Touch her pretty clit for me, make her cum for us.” Felix does as instructed, snaking his hand down to where Chan pushes in and out between your bodies. “So good, love. Cum for us,” he says into your ear. 

His fingers barely brush your clit when you’re cumming hard around Chan’s cock, squeezing around his length hard. He rocks his hips into yours, helping you ride out your release before he pulls out and cums all over your ass. You’re whining and clutching onto Felix, though you don’t realize it; his hand runs small circles onto your back. When he looks down at you it’s as if you hung the stars, gaze so full of adoration that your heart batters against your chest in response loud enough that he very well might hear it. 

Somewhere behind you, Chan leaves and then returns with something to clean you up. You only know this when you feel the soft material on your back and you let out a grunt of appreciation. Chan sits next to you now, spooning you from the side where you lay across Felix’s body. 

“Are you okay?” Chan speaks softly. 

You scoff. “I just fucked the two people I’ve been in love with for years. You think I’m not okay?” 

“Love. You love us?” Felix asks. 

You laugh. You can’t help it, because how the fuck do you keep on embarrasing yourself like this? It’s as if they can read your mind, because before you can backtrack or word-vomit they’re already speaking. 

“I don’t know if I made this clear,” Chan starts. “But my feelings for you, they’re strong. I love you too. It’s nothing to be ashamed of.” 

“Same here, love. We’ve wanted this for forever. If you’ll let us have you, we want you to be ours.” He whispers a soft ‘I love you’ into your hair and you find yourself overcome with emotion. 

The movie is still playing on the TV. It makes you laugh when you realize something. 

“Did you both seriously invite me over for dinner just so you could seduce me?” 

“Hey hey!” Chan laughs, tickling your side for a moment. “You’re the one that begged for us to ruin you, babygirl. Did you get what you wanted?” 

“I don’t know,” you say, pretending to be in thought. “I’m not feeling super ruined at the moment.” 

“That can be arranged.” 

*** Last installment of the threesome series <3 Thank you everyone for reading. If you want to check out the other three chapters, you can find them in my masterlist.

Taglist: @lolareadsimagines @elizalabs3 @chvn-max

[caligvlasaqvarivm]

was rereading the convo dirk has with dave and was captivated by the subtle work done to indicate how very much this was not actually a good or productive convo for dirk, and a capstone on the toxic mess that is him and hal

in the exact same conversation that dave is explaining, and dirk is seemingly accepting, that beta!dirk/bro should not have been allowed near a child, dirk chooses to bring up hal. and he does it to be really shitty.

DIRK: Creating him was an interesting exercise I guess, but over the years I came to see his development as one of my biggest mistakes. DIRK: He sort of turned into a monster. But I could never bring myself to get rid of him, or even really blame him for being an asshole, because he wasn't actually that different from me.

like... hal is dirk's younger brother/kid, right?

that's part of the reason that when hal starts using a different color, it's dave's red. in one part, the orange/red split is evocative of dave/davesprite, casting dirk/hal as foils, but... i don't think the lil bro/"kid i'm responsible for" vibe is unintentional, either. especially when paired with the fact that the brainscan is of 13-year-old dirk, and that the words "nascent" and "emergent" are used to describe hal's consciousness, all implying an element of youthfulness or childishness to him that isn't applied to dirk.

hal is fully sapient, has real feelings (by dirk's own admission, too), and is also, like, completely his own guy. he's not a dirk splinter, he's a computer housing a dirk splinter, and he and dirk only think they're the same guy because their individual issues happen to perfectly align in the worst possible way.

so if you look at their relationship through that lens instead - a frankenstein/frankenstein's monster scenario (which is also directly and intentionally an exploration on parenthood) at best and dirk Pretty Much Actually Just Making A Child at worst - doesn't it become really fucked up that Dirk tried to kill him?

Doesn't it become really fucked up that Dirk is outright calling him a "mistake" and a "monster"?

the other really interesting thing here is when he talks about Jake - specifically, the way he chooses to "make it up to" jake. which is to say, he doesn't.

DIRK: I wouldn't be surprised if he was trying to avoid me as much as possible. DIRK: I'm sure that's for the best. DIRK: I think I need to stay out of his business for a good while, so I don't risk poisoning another innocent kid's life.

This isn't a solution. Hell, this isn't even an apology. This is just self-isolation, self-punishment, more of Dirk's martyrdom complex and teen boy diva bullshit.

yes, dirk hates himself, but the actual toxic loop he's stuck in is one where he doesn't address any of his problems. he identifies what his issues are, he feels really bad about them, he can enunciate them very clearly to other people, but then, instead of fixing them, he inflicts punishment on himself and then calls it a day.

We know that this is a bullshit thing to do to Jake because we know the situation from jake's side of things.

GT: Do you think you could relay the same sentiments to dirk? GT: I was thinking about all the stuff he said to me while we were all telling him to dance. GT: And yeah i was really being a prick when i ran away to lomax. GT: He was right about everything. I should have come clean about wanting some space.

jake wants reconciliation! jake wants to address the fact that he failed and apologize! jake wants to be friends again!

self-punishment is not a solution, and while I don't think dirk is entirely cognizant that he's doing it, by venting to dave - who literally has no idea what's been going on in dirk's group - he's able to frame the story - ahem, control the narrative - to justify his own shitty choice to not actually improve as a person, but instead to wallow in his own self-inflicted misery. If he'd said what he did about Hal to Jake, Roxy, or Jane - all of whom recognized hal's personhood and emotional reality to some degree, and spoke with him extensively - how would they respond? If they knew he'd tried to kill Hal, how would they respond?

The answer to that is why he doesn't tell them, and has got to be ticking in the background to explain why Dirk chooses to isolate himself from them. Put simply, I think the reason why he seems to think his friends never know the worst of him is because he deliberately avoids showing them. If he showed them, they wouldn't stay quiet, and if they didn't stay quiet, he'd actually have to... do something about it, instead of just indulging in some self-punishment and walking away feeling like the problem was solved.

and i think part of why he's so terrible to hal is because, on some level, he recognizes that he does kind of owe it to hal to be better. because, you see.

Hal is his kid.

hal's existence, hal's circumstances, and hal's suffering are a direct result of dirk's decisions, and hal is taking him to task for them. the things dirk really resents about hal are less the ways that hal is a reflection of dirk, though that's in there too, but the fact that hal is asking dirk to take responsibility. actual responsibility. that hal keeps confronting him with the fact that he's the one who caused hal's plight, he's the one with the power to fix it, and he's the one choosing inaction and avoidance.

TT: I'm guessing she's touching base to remind me about the party tomorrow. TT: I don't know what to tell her yet. Or Jane, for that matter. TT: It could get pretty awkward. TT: I have no idea if Jake will be there, and I'm not about to write another cringe-inducing message of desperation for him to ignore. AR: Would you like me to calculate the probability of his attendance? TT: Fuck no. AR: Are you sure? AR: My probabilities are extremely precise. TT: Your probabilities don't mean dick. AR: I could hack his chats, and determine what his plans are. TT: No. Don't do that either. [...] TT: Just don't do anything. Seriously. TT: No hacking, no calculations. Do absolutely nothing.

That's why Dirk takes such exception to the AI thing, too.

AR: In any case, my use of the responder responder is ironic. TT: It's not ironic. TT: YOU were ironic when I made you. TT: Then you became self-aware, and ruined irony forever.

then you became self-aware - in other words, "then you became a free-thinking entity and those jokes became reminders that your situation is fucked up, and i'm the one who put you in it". in other words, "and then you were born, and i had to be responsible for that". because, after all, the AI jokes that dirk hates so much? those aren't a reflection of dirk. that's all hal, baby. dirk can't use his "i hate you because i hate myself" excuse on that.

now i don't want to make it sound like i'm saying that dirk is a monster or anything. he does care, very fucking deeply, about his friends. and i think this conversation was genuinely very cathartic and helpful for dave. and it is, genuinely, very tragic that he does actually hate himself to the point where he finds it difficult to believe that he can get better, or even that he deserves to get better.

but those feelings have transformed into a vastly more harmful attitude of wilful, obstinate refusal to change, and even outright resentment and fear towards those that would ask him to. it's subtler than some of the others, but his convo with dave really highlights that dirk has not finished developing as a character yet. and i think it's really neat.