#the brady brood

[titleknown]

Fun Fact: Apparently the original planned title for The Brady Bunch was "The Brady Brood" which was objected to due to sounding like a horror film.

Which like, I think we can all agree the Brady Bunch would be substantially better if one of the family could produce psychically-controlled rage-fetus-monsters to kill people.

[thewintersoldierdisaster]

i don’t usually write aus but i can’t get the idea of a princess reader with brady as her loyal knight out of my head. maybe he grew up in the castle, training to be part of the kingsguard, and the mischievous young princess befriends him, not concerned about their different stations. he’s her first kiss when they’re just children and she bullies him into teaching her some self defense. he’s always been halfway in love with her, but knows she’s meant to marry for the good of the kingdom.

he’s fine with it (he’ll never be fine with it and will love her until his dying day) until the king is assassinated and she’s the queen regent and he’s put on her guard, swearing to protect her with his life. he stands guard at her door, stoic until he hears her sobbing in her room about her dead father and the responsibility on her shoulders. against his training, brady cracks open the door and she flings herself into his arms, sobbing on his shoulder and he curls around her, stays the night with her head tucked under his chin

and as she grows more confident in her ruling abilities, her advisors have her presented with suitors and she turns them all away, loyal knight brady at her side throughout it all. he’s the only one she can talk to because he’s the only one who has her best interests at heart

and she convinces him to bring her for a midnight stroll around the gardens because she feels like she’s suffocating in the castle. and he agrees and under the moonlight she grabs him by the tunic and kisses him and he kisses her back before he remembers himself, gently pushing her away, wishing he could kiss the dismayed pout off her face

and she listens to his excuses and dismisses them as excuses and he’s never really been able to say no to his princess so they begin an affair and his princess says she’ll have no one but her knight by her side

and she continues to reject the suitors during the day while screaming brady’s name at night and he whispers promises and oaths into her skin, traces his fingers over her skin, vows to never leave her side

and she cards her fingers through his hair - grey, far too grey for someone so young, but she loves it, calls it distinguished - and whispers that she will never allow him to leave her side

and she makes a pronouncement to her advisors, her loyal knight at her side, that she will be wed to her loyal knight or she will abdicate and the people of the kingdom love their princess and will riot if she abdicates so they’re left with no choice really. she leaves them no choice, her face set in stony determination

and there is a spring wedding, gates to the castle thrown open, a feast and dancing and kisses no longer in secret and the princess marries her loyal knight, who becomes her loyal husband, most trusted advisor, and father to the brood of children he can’t seem to stop putting in her

and they live happily ever after

[markrosewater]

Hi Mark,

I've successfully entered my fifth decade of life and wish to invoke the rite of birthday trivia, pretty please. What've you got on The Sultai Brood?

Khans of Tarkir was originally going to be four factions, two two-color and two three-color. That is until the creative team came up with the Sultai Brood. Brady Dommermuth, the then creative director, begged me to add it.

I did, but realized that if we went to five factions, we’d have to change the colors to all have the same number of colors. That became wedge as it’s the one mix we hadn’t done before.

I would later us the original faction color breakdown in Ixalan.

Happy Birthday!

[runwithwolvcs]

Addicted to You

three - Bad Habit

Smuttish

word count: 2826

As much as she loved animals, Sulli had finally come to terms with the downside of being a veterinarian. Helping injured animals made her happy, she loved seeing the smiles on their owners faces when she gave them good news. But seeing the animals that couldn’t be helped, or the ones that were surrendered to the clinic because the owners didn't realise how hard it was to take care of animals, or worse, because they just didn’t want them anymore, broke her heart.

Sulli wished she could take them all home with her to love and adore them the way they deserved, but that was just a fantasy. 

“Hey babes, you’ve got mail.” She heard Kaycee call out to her as she shut the front door.

Sulli collected the mail for her from the table in the entry way as she walked into the living room. She nearly groaned out loud as she noticed Collin cuddled up to her best friend, and Brady sat stretched out on the adjacent couch.

“We were just about to start a movie, do you want to join us?” Kaycee asked her with a smile.

“Is it Teen Wolf?” She jabbed, causing Collin to glare at her. Guess he hadn’t informed Kaycee of his extracurricular activities.

Kaycee laughed and asked, “No, why is that the first movie that came to mind?”

“Dunno.” She shrugged,  “I’ll be upstairs.”

Sulli picked up her cat, Tommy, from underneath his little heat lamp that was meant for the plants littered throughout the living room. It was his favourite spot to wait for her in. Even with the many cat trees scattered throughout the house, he never looked happier than when he was under the lamp or in Sullis arms.

She brought him up to her room and carefully placed him on the small cat tree in her room.

Sulli sat on her bed sifting through the mail that was hers. Only one letter caught her attention. She carefully opened the envelope and took out the paper. It was a classic white letter sheet, with a handwritten letter. The little drawings caught her eye and she couldn't help but smile. She turned her head to the door as two soft knocks sounded throughout the room. 

“Can I come in?” Brady asked as he poked his head in. He didn't wait for a response and let himself in, a look of concern on his face as his eyes drifted down to the letter in her hands, he grimaced and wrang out his fingers.

She rolled her eyes, turning her attention back to the letter in her hand. She read it quickly and let out a shaky sigh. She quickly wiped the lone tear that had fallen before standing up and placing the letter on the desk in her room. 

“I need to change.” She muttered, trying to keep her tone even. She didn't want to cry in front of him. She didn't want to seem weak, because she wasn’t. She was tired, tired of people pushing her around for no reason. As if she didn't get that enough when she was a teenager.

“Nothing I haven't seen before.” He quipped, sitting on the edge of her bed where she had just been sitting.

She scoffed, “You have a lot of fucking nerve”

“Sulli, I--” He started to defend himself.

“Brady,” She stopped him, bringing her hands up to her face to prevent herself from losing it at him. She still considered him a friend, even if what he was doing was cowardly,  “I’ve had a hard day and I really don’t want to do this right now.”

Brady looked at her with concern, and suggested, “How ‘bout we go for a ride, just you and me?”

“You said that you were told--” She started, only to be cut off.

“I know,” He grabbed her waist and guided her towards where he sat on his bed, “But I can’t stand to see you cry, Sulli.”

“I’m not crying.” She brooded. Though her voice and sniffles told another story.

“I’ll take you to Cows and you can get your usual chocolate chip cookie dough cone, hows that sound?” He offered as she pulled off her top and untied her pants.

“Sounds like coercion.” She said, stepping out of her scrub pants, “Besides, I think I’m in a Sasquatch Trails mood.”

Brady watched her undress, leaning back on his hands, and with a grin he stated,“Whatever you want, babe.”

------

“So, you know our secret.” Brady asked, looking for confirmation. 

The ride between the ice cream shop and his house had been filled with questions avoiding the topic. Though she could tell he was dying to ask. Now, as they sat on the porch of his home, looking out at the stars that she really gets to see in Forks, he must’ve felt more comfortable asking. Or maybe it was because she had ice cream in her system.

“Mhm.” She hummed, and continued to slowly eat her ice cream cone. Brady had opted for a cup as the driver of their ice cream run. They had been going back and forth sharing their own preferred icecreams. Sulli knew that he got cookie dough because she had mentioned it was her favourite early on in their friendship, it was a nice gesture.

She handed him the cone and he showed his self restraint by not wolfing it down. She giggled at the thought as he handed it  back.

“How do you know exactly?” Brady asked, giving her a spoonful of his ice cream. 

“Before I went into foster care, I stayed with Sue Clearwater. She's my aunt.” She explained, licking her lips free of excess ice cream. 

Brady gave her a shocked look, “Sue told you?”

“No, Leah and Paul did.” She corrected with a shake of her head,  “Well, they showed me.”

Brady nodded, before asking, “And you haven't told anyone?”

“Not a single soul,” Sulli confirmed. She knew how important it was, even if she didn’t exactly care about the pack, she knew they couldn't control their genetics. Why make their lives hell just because hers was? She sighed and slumped down in her seat,   “Unlike them, I keep my promises.”

“Paul--” Brady started and Sulli rolled her eyes at the name before cutting him off.

“I don’t care, Brady.” She tutted, “And you shouldn’t let him tell you what to do, it makes you look like a pansy.”

“He's kind of the last person on earth I’d want to piss off.” He mentioned with a laugh, “Though, this probably will.”

“Seems like tomorrow's issue.” She said licking her ice cream cone suggestively.

He watched intently before looking down at his cup and stabbing the remainder of his icecream with his spoon, “Sulli, I want to, I do. But we really can’t.”

“Why? He’ll already be pissed off at you.” She asked, but the look on his face, one of regret and pain made her concede, “Fine.”

“We can still break in that blanket you got me. It really does help.” He suggested.

“Six feet apart?” She mocked.

Brady laughed boyishly, “No, I'll need to keep you warm. I know how cold you get.”

“Deal.” She grinned at the compromise. Pulling out her phone quickly, Sulli texted Kaycee to let her know that she would not be coming home for the night. She knew her best friend would take care of Tommy just as well as she could for the night. She slid her phone back into her pocket before Brady grabbed her hand and let her upstairs to his room. He shared a house with Collin and for two boys in their twenties, it was extremely well kept. Even his room was quite clean, with only a few items of clothes thrown about. 

He grabbed the folded duvet off of his dresser, “You might need this.” Brady dropped it onto the bed and spread it along the edge of the bed, so that she could reach for it if necessary.

They two got into bed together and Sulli immediately knew she would be too cold as she inched closer to him. Brady wrapped his arm around her, the two as close as they could be, before he switched on the little tv on his wall and threw on the Movie Network. She knew it would just be background noise while they talked over it. It always was.

“You’re so warm.” She murmured, sliding her hand underneath his sweatshirt as she laid her head on his chest. The feeling of his skin radiating a comforting heat onto her hand made her crave more. She was glad the cooling blanket worked well enough for him though, she could barely feel it saddled up next to him. She couldn't imagine how hot he was underneath the duvet.

“Sulli,” He whispered softly.

She looked at him with a serious look, her hand stopping its travels on his solid abdomen, “Say no and I’ll stop.”

“And if I don't?” He asked with a cocked eyebrow. They were both losing this ‘no sex’ battle. Though there were more consequences for him than Sulli. 

“I want you, Brady.” She whispered. Sulli almost cringed outwardly at how desperate she sounded. The heat pooling between her legs stopped her from caring, her needs were more important in that moment than her pride.

She gasped as he flipped their position without notice. As she looked up at Brady, the want was clear in his eyes.  “I’m practically a dead man walking at this point,” He stated with a chuckle,  “What's one more nail in the coffin?”

“Are you sure?” She asked. A part of her felt guilty to put him in this position, but the feeling of his hips pressing into her own reassured her that he was just as wanton as she was.

“I regret not keeping you to myself.” He muttered. Brady stroked her hair out of her face and behind her ear, before softly mumbling, “It’ll be like closure.”

“Hey,” She said, bringing her hand up to cup his cheek with a sly smile,  “I get it, sort of. They’re like family to you, but I still want to be friends with you. No matter what Paul says, he can't take you away from me. Not if you don't let him get to you.”

 “I’ll try.” He said earnestly, before grinning as he added, “You’re like the coolest girl I've ever met.”

“I don’t need the flattery, Brady.” She chewed on her lip as she arched her back, pressing their chest together. The throbbing between her legs almost painful, “I just want you to fuck me.”

---------------------

“Goodmorning,” she whispered, throwing her leg over his body to straddle him. It was official, Sulli had succumbed to her heat addiction. She never wanted to feel cold again. “You’re alive,” She teased, brushing his dark locks out of his eyes.

He hummed in delight, “I like waking up like this.”

Brady's hand travelled her spine, causing goosebumps to raise across her body. “I can tell.” murmured softly. She could feel how hard she was, and she knew how easy it would be to slip him into her if she wanted to. Just one dip of her hips and the tip would slide right into her heat. She trusted Brady enough to not get tested for STDs but not enough to let him enjoy her raw. Sulli dipped her head down and pressed a kiss to his lips, pulling away slightly to ask, “Do you have work this morning?”

The door to his bedroom flung open, surprising both of them. Brady had been too focused on the slick heat she was pooling near his length as he resisted taking her right then and there, to hear anybody coming up the stairs.

“Brady, you’re--” A man's voice interrupted, the tone of disbelief had her looking over her shoulder to see who was speaking, just as the man muttered, “Oh, he’s going to kill you.”

“Jared!” Brady shouted, but he seemed more concerned about the unnamed man not seeing Sulli naked.  He wrapped her in the duvet as she sat up, still warm from their body temperatures melding together underneath the sheets. Brady grabbed his boxers and slipped them on clumsily before sitting next to her on the  bed. She inched closer to him to seek out more of his heat. 

In all honesty, she was hoping for a third round before her next shift at the clinic.

“God, you are so dramatic.” She groaned, “We were just sleeping.”

“Sulli,” Brady shook his head, with a serious look on his face. As if he was telling her to be quiet. 

She didn't even know who this man was and it felt like he was judging her. Judging them. All because some guy from ten years ago has some weird sense of entitlement over her. 

“No, I’m allowed to sleep with, and fuck, whoever I want.” She shot back at him, narrowing her eyes at the man who had barged in, “Who even are you?”

“Jared.” He said politely, looking toward Sulli who had stood on her knees to grab Brady's sweater from the edge of the bed. Tossed aside from the night before. His eyes widened as he took in her lack of clothes,  “And you’re naked.”

He turned to look away, swearing under his breath. She giggled at his uncomfortableness. 

“He’s Paul's best friend,” Brady said. He had put on a pair of gym shorts, but was still without a shirt. With every honest answer, he just got hotter and hotter. She knew she liked him for a reason.

“Best friend, huh?” She questioned Jared, “So you know all about his sex life?”

“Unfortunately.” He grimaced.

Sulli smirked, asking, “Right, so has he ever fucked any of your friends?”

“No,” He said quickly.

“But he fucked Jacobs sister.” Brady countered. Sulli grinned at the newfound confidence her friend had pulled together before Brady added, “Pretty sure he still is.”

Jareds eyes widened as he looked at Sulli to the younger boy, “Brady!”

Bingo!

That was all the information Sulli needed. How was Paul going to tell Brady to stay away from her when he was fucking his own friends sister?! In her books, that was arguably worse. He didn't even really know Sulli, and she definitely didn’t know him. Only bits of memory from her eleventh birthday and Christmas had been ingrained in her mind, that was it.

“Thanks, Brady, now all you need to do is grow a pair.” She said sweetly, patting him on the shoulder before turning back to Jared with a scowl, “And you can tell Paul hes a fucking hypocrite and that he doesn’t know me like he thinks he does.”

The older boy laughed, “You can tell him yourself at the bonfire.”

“Jared,” Brady shook his head, a silent conversation happening between the two boys.

Jared sighed in annoyance, “You didn’t do it, did you?”

“Do what?” Sulli asked him in confusion.

“He was supposed to ask you to come,” The older boy explained, adding,  “Your friends coming so you might as well tag along,”

Her lips parted at the mention of Kaycee attending, no doubt in her mind that she would be going with Collin. The way Jared had mentioned it so nonchalantly made her blood boil. She didn't care that Kaycee was going, that's another argument, for another day. 

The idea of begging her best friend to ditch the wolf she was currently shacking up with had crossed her mind, but that would just make her a hypocrite considering whose bed she woke up in.

“Fuck you, I’m not going.” Sulli swore at Jared before turning to Brady and pointing an angry finger at him, “And fuck you, thats the only reason you were over yesterday, wasn’t it?”

“Yeah, but I wasn’t going to ask you.” He said honestly. She knew he was telling the truth, she could see the desperation to be believed on his face.

“You weren’t?” Jared asked with a cocked eyebrow as he folded his arms over his chest, “You told Paul you would.”

Of course he did. She was almost stunned by the idea, but the fact that Brady didn’t follow through and instead actively tried, and succeeded in making her day better is what stopped her from lunging at him in anger. She was aware of the bounty that would be on his head once it got out that Jared had found them naked in bed together, and now that he had apparently failed to do what was asked of him, she could only imagine how much worse it would be once Paul found out.

“She was crying, bro.” Brady said as shook his head. 

“I’m going home,” Sulli said in disbelief. She no longer wanted to listen to this conversation, glaring at Brady as she told him, “Text me when you’ve cut the cord, Brady.”

[nehswritesstuffs]

Father Like Son, Mother Like Daughter, Parent Like Child - Part 2 of 4

This thing has me so pumped you have no idea lol it’s just the Brady Bunch but people who could murder you (if just eventually) and I love it

First chapter on [tumblr] - [FFN] - [AO3]

Bell-mère and Cora adjust to their new situation, while their collective brood makes the best of things. [8506 words; AU where Cora-san and Bell-mère live with their six kids in the East Blue and everyone is better-adjusted]

It was the dead of night as Bell-mère lay awake, staring at the ceiling of her bedroom with Cora curled around her. Well, she guessed it was their bedroom now, as she was very decidedly not upset by the events the week before that led to her taking her old flame and coaxing it back into an inferno. Moving her head slightly, she pressed a kiss to his forehead, her nose taking in the smell of sweat, mikans, and musk that was him. He stopped his soft snores long enough to hum happily in his sleep—who knew that the man could do cute?

After a while of laying there, Bell-mère heard quick footsteps rush out of one of the other bedrooms, down the stairs, and out the door. She got out of bed, careful to not wake Cora, and pulled on a nightgown and robe, padding down the stairs so that she could look out the window.

It was Law… and he was huddled in the mikan grove.

Sighing heavily, she went outside and found the lad shivering underneath one of the trees. He gasped when he noticed her, having been too enveloped in his own thoughts to be aware of his surroundings. There was sick down his front and in the grass—something was wrong.

“Are we going to talk about it?” she asked. The boy simply stared at her with those eyes that were so, so sad and so, so tired. “Let’s at least get that shirt off of you—come on.”

The teen didn’t make a fuss as she pulled his soiled shirt off him and let it plop down on the grass. She pulled him up and draped her robe over him before leading him along to a different part of the grove, away from the smell of bile.

“I’ve never seen you this spooked before,” she said quietly, running her fingers through his hair. “What has you like this?”

“I…” He went quiet, not sure of what to say or how to phrase it. “You know I get nightmares, right?”

“Everyone does, but no one like you, I bet.” It grew quiet, only the crickets and frogs making the noise between them. “What happened?”

“Nami was there.”

She considered that carefully. “What do you mean?”

“Nami was there, instead of… my first sister.” Bell-mère raised an eyebrow at that, giving the boy room to explain. “Before I met Cora-san, I had a mom, a dad, and a little sister. They’re dead now. Nami and Lami… they should be about the same age. It makes sense, when you think of it that way.”

Bell-mère nodded slowly at that—she knew a lot of the boy’s origins from what Cora had told her, but she clearly didn’t know it all… only Law did. “Does she know this?”

“Gingersnap? No. I…” Law pulled the robe tighter, feeling the chill in the night air. “I can’t do that to her. Not now. It’s not fair to her.”

“…but she’ll know eventually, right?” The teen nodded. “Hey… did Rosi ever tell you about why I quit the Marines?”

“You didn’t want to raise Nami and Nojiko on a base, right?”

“That’s a big part of it, but it’s not everything.” She began to pull the lad back to the house, making sure to avoid the sick-covered shirt. “I want to say the first… what… three months I had the girls I was trying to figure out who they really were, what happened to their actual family, what the Marines were even doing in Oykot Kingdom…”

“Oykot…?” Law furrowed his brow as he was led into the kitchen and made to sit down. “Where’s that?”

“No longer exists,” Bell-mère shuddered. “When I was briefed, we were supposed to be aiding the local law enforcement in the round-up and capture of a large number of pirate-led dissidents so that they could stand trial and make their grievances known in court. That wasn’t what happened.”

Law watched Bell-mère put together tea in silence, unsure how to continue. It wasn’t until he had a steaming mug passed his way did he finally find his voice again.

“What did happen?”

“It was more than just a massive protest we were flung into, but a full-on war. I was one of the officers with a false briefing—the ones given the real orders laid waste to the kingdom, killing everyone not in a Marine uniform. Some of us questioned them, only to get shot ourselves. It was only supposed to be a peacekeeping mission, and yet…”

“That’s… a lot like Flevance,” the lad realized. “Let me guess: when you took it to Headquarters, there was nothing that could have been done?”

“They flat-out lied to my fucking face, kid,” she growled. “They said that rebels, pirates, whomever wasn’t us, killed the citizens, that it was beyond Marine control until the end, and that any casualties were an unfortunate side-effect. There’s nothing simply unfortunate about me laying in the dirt, barely clinging to life and ready to die, as a toddler carrying an infant just finds me because neither of them have anywhere else to go. Those three months, I learned a lot.”

“…about what…?”

“I learned that the entire oath I swore to protect the citizens was a lie, that the force I had pledged myself to was a shell of its image, and that there was nothing I could do to change it, even if I gathered all the other good Marines in the organization and went public. I learned that the girls were just that in the eyes of the government—just a pair of orphaned children—and that it didn’t care as much as I hoped it would.”

“…and their actual family…?”

“Right here, in this house,” Bell-mère replied gently. She placed her hand on the kid’s shoulder and squeezed gently. “You know what it was like to lose Lami, and… something tells me that you’re all the more prepared to take care of the siblings you have now because of that, which is a force more powerful than any of us are able to admit.” Tears welled up in Law’s eyes once more and she tutted. “Don’t give me that shit—you’re a bleeding heart, just like Rosi.”

“Did… did he know…?”

“Know what?”

“The lies.”

She both nodded and shrugged at that. “It’s been his goal for a long time to take his brother out of commission. He accepted long ago that sometimes you have to ignore some really evil shit in order to take down an even bigger, more evil, shit, because in the end… you can’t truly clean up unless you start from the top, or else as soon as you get something clean further down, a new load lands thanks to the ones on top.” She took a sip of her own tea and exhaled heavily. “Makes you wonder sometimes if the pirates know a bit more than we do about shit.”

“I think… I might become one again…” the teen confessed quietly. He watched Bell-mère raise her eyebrow inquisitively. “There’s a lot I want to do… to learn… and a pirate doesn’t have to worry about protocol or chain of command or anything like that.”

“As someone who is currently supporting your ass while on a Marine pension, I’d say to go for it,” she smirked. “I’d almost go as far to say to maybe get your older brothers in the hierarchy as moles, but they’re not built for the bullshit that’d be involved.”

“That’s an understatement,” Law grumbled into his tea. Bell-mère let out a barking laugh at that, confusing the boy with her amusement.

“You really are like Rosi: bleeding heart, perceptive, and you hold a spark that can’t be faked. Can’t say anything about a man I’ll never meet, but you’re sure the spit of the dad you got now… if only in how much you torture my poor blood pressure.”

“It’s all those years of smoking,” the lad said innocently. He suppressed a smirk as Bell-mère glared at him. “What? Offer still stands to scrape all the tar out of your lungs.”

“I don’t care how good of a doctor you are; I better be dying if you pull me apart like that,” she glowered. She smiled inwardly as Law let out a soft giggle—at least he was back to where he should be in that regard. “Hey… you good now…?”

He nodded. “Yeah. For now.”

“Go the fuck to sleep, kid. We’ll take care of your shirt in the morning.”

-_-_-_-_-_-_-

Rolling her eyes, Bell-mère allowed Cora to pepper her throat and clavicle with kisses, keeping her busy as his hands roamed elsewhere. It was monsoon season and business was slow, leading them to their bedroom in the middle of the day to weather away the wet and wind that was outside. She was close to flipping him onto his back and really getting things started when four knocks rapped upon the door.

“Bell-mère…? Cora-san…?”

“Go away, Bepo,” Bell-mère groaned. “Not now.”

“Sorry …but Nami says we should take shelter in the cellar. She says the storm is gonna get really bad soon.”

“Then go make sure the orchard’s alright.” She waited until she heard the Mink’s heavy footsteps walk away from the door before she let out a grunt. “Fuck… that just killed the mood.”

“Nami just wants to make sure everything’s alright,” Cora murmured against her pulse point. “Kid’s way too good at predicting kinds of weather to just ignore it, but she’s not good at figuring out the other bits yet.” He snapped his fingers and Bell-mère could feel him smile. “Now we’re safe.”

“We better be.” She hummed in satisfaction as Cora’s hands went down to the buttons of her shirt; it was about damn time.

At least when the younger three kids broke down the door five minutes later after hearing no response, Bell-mère still had her bra on.

-_-_-_-_-_-_-

“What are you guys doing…?” Nojiko asked, wrinkling her nose. Penguin and Shachi had frozen in place, while Law tried to look as dignified as possible as they all sat huddled on the floor of his bedroom, papers littering the space around them.

“Language lessons,” he said, voice cracking. The girl stared flatly at him in an effort to seem not impressed. “It’s… uh… a Northern thing.”

“Is that why Bepo’s not learning?”

“Bepo wants to learn, but I don’t want to distract him right now from studying with Nami,” Law claimed. “Besides, this will be useful when we get older and sail out to sea, like our own code.”

“Yeah, until you run into someone else who knows it.”

“I… doubt that.” Nojiko saw something flicker across the teen’s face and knew something was unsaid that probably should be out in the open. She picked up a paper and looked at it critically.

“What’s it called?”

The boys all looked at one another before swallowing hard, with Law answering, “Flevench. It’s the language where I’m from.”

“Does Cora-san know it?”

They shook their heads.

“Then we really should get Bepo and Nami in on this. You do realize that this is not only a code for you goons, but it can be a code for all us siblings?”

“You… want to learn Flevench…?”

“How are all three of you older than me but still so stupid?” Nojiko huffed. She sat on the bedroom floor with them and summoned the serenest expression she could gather. “Now, what are we learning?”

Law looked away for a moment, trying not to cry, before he began to reexplain the lesson.

-_-_-_-_-_-_-

There was a part of Cora that wasn’t entirely certain that leaving either the Marines or the Donquixote Family was amongst the smartest moves he’d made in his life. Both organizations had order, in their own way, as well as long-standing protocol that he could fall back on when things got dicey. Even if it involved people who he couldn’t stand, there was still a sense of security involved in both, if only because people were still generally bound by a certain set of rules and decorum.

Raising kids, though? He wished it were as simple as that.

“Which one of you little terrors took my clothes?!” Shachi seethed as he stormed into the house. He was sopping wet, with only his hat to awkwardly cover his modesty and his sunglasses to shield everyone else from his murderous glare. The four kids at the table jumped, dropping pencils and losing pages.

“Be decent; your sisters are here,” Cora teased from over by the counter as he made sandwiches. He watched as Shachi grabbed an apron from the peg and wrapped it around his lower half.

“Yeah,” Nami added. “We don’t want a repeat of going to the bath in town.”

“I can still prove that was you, you little shit,” Shachi threatened. “I’m still getting turned down for dates!”

“No,” Law stated, “you get turned down for dates because of your uncomfortable codependency with Penguin causing speculation that generally prohibits courtship rituals.”

“Devil Fruit or not I will beat you up in your sleep…”

“Kids, I might not have brought you into this world, but I will take you out of it if necessary,” Cora mentioned. He then noted how there was only one of the elder pair standing there, which sent off alarm bells in his brain. “Shachi…?”

“What?!”

“Where’s your brother?”

“Little Penguin does not go in the hat since his is tougher to wash, so I’m the one figuring out which sibling to murder.”

“You are murdering no one, young man.”

“I am going to murder some thieves and I don’t think anyone can blame me!”

At that, Bepo broke out into hysterical tears, completely giving away the ruse of innocence. Nami and Nojiko tried to calm him while readying to block Shachi, while Law picked up the drawing compass and flicked up a Room.

“Kids!” Cora yelled. It didn’t matter; Shachi was down body parts and still charging, while the girls were protecting their fuzziest brother. Cora—without thinking, mind—grabbed a wooden spoon from the rack and, dusting off his spy training, threw it at Shachi’s head with pin-point precision.

“Ow! What was that for?!”

“Don’t kill your siblings!”

“They stole our clothes!”

“You were the idiot who left them unsupervised!”

“…but Daaaddd!”

The entire room froze, Shachi bringing a hand to cover his mouth while everyone else stared at him. Cora’s jaw dropped as he stared at the teen, who was now dark with blush.

“What did you just say…?” he asked the sixteen-year-old. Shachi shuddered before lowering his hand.

“I… um… I came in and you were making everyone lunch… it’s kind of what you are…”

“Really…?”

“Well, duh,” Nami added. “Why wouldn’t you be our dad?”

That was when the tears started flowing in earnest.

-_-_-_-_-_-_-

Bell-mère came in for lunch that day to find that not only was it not made, but that the man she woke up next to every morning (boyfriend? Manfriend? Fuck-buddy? Co-parent with benefits? Fuck if she knew what label to use) was sitting on the floor of the dining area, sobbing incoherently as five of their children tried to make sure that he was alright. One wasn’t even wearing clothes, for some odd reason.

This was what she deserved, she guessed, for not kicking them out sooner.

“Mom…?” Nojiko asked. “Can you watch Dad while we bring Peng-nii his clothes? We pulled a prank and… well…”

...ah. No wonder. Only her bleeding heart.

-_-_-_-_-_-_-

Arlong the Saw.

Captain of the newly-formed Arlong Pirates, the Fish-man decided to take some practical measures when it came to building his fledgling empire. Placing himself out of his former captain Jinbe’s reach, he decided to set himself up in a wee, sleepy town in the middle of the weakest Blue. There, he knew, he could take over a Human town with ease, extort it and the surrounding area, and in the end have the bribe that he would pass to the local Marines be not even a dent in his work. His aim was to subjugate the puny and upstart Humans, making them pay for everything that was ever done to Fishfolk and Merkind, all while raking in the treasures hidden within the peaceful stereotype of the East. With the local Marines pre-bribed and the town’s sheriff literally choking in his grip, it seemed as though everything was going off without a hitch.

He did not, however, take into account the local youth.

“Oi! Fish-face! What the fuck do you think you’re doing?!”

Arlong turned and saw six children standing just beyond the crowd—five Humans and, shit, a Mink—all looking like they were ready to fight. Even the littlest one—a ginger girl with a staff taller than her—seemed to think they could take him on. Shit, the oldest was still a teenager…

This was going to be good.

“Why, I’m collecting tribute,” Arlong shrugged. “I can explain how it works, if you’d like.”

“We know how tribute works,” stated one of the boys. He was wiry and serious, no older than sixteen at the Fish-man’s reckoning. “These people owe no such thing to anyone.”

“See, now that’s where you’re wrong,” Arlong said. “If I don’t collect this money, then I am going to kill people. That’s tribute.”

“You don’t need to mansplain it,” the girl with blue hair snapped. “We get enough of that from my idiot eldest brothers.”

“I’m hurt, Nojicakes, that you would seriously think that of us,” one of the other lads gasped in fake-insult. “It is our job as your brothers to make sure you grow up knowing how the world works, and…”

“Give it up, Sach,” a third lad sighed. “She has us nailed with our metaphorical dicks out.”

“Kids! Get out of here!” the sheriff shouted. “Leave while you can! Get off the island!”

“That still doesn’t solve the issue at-hand, which is the fact that these assholes are trying to terrorize our home,” the first lad stated. “How about if we give these invaders until the count of three to surrender?”

“To you…?” Arlong scoffed. “I don’t think so.”

“What do you say, Gingersnap? How about if you do the honors,” the third lad asked. The smallest girl grinned confidently.

“One!”

“Kids, leave!”

“No way, Uncle Genzo; this is our home too.”

“Two!”

“Shahahahahaha… this is going to be satisfying. Maybe I’ll start with eating your pet first.”

“That’s not our pet,” the second lad scoffed. “That’s our cute baby brother.”

“Three! Looks like they asked for it!”

“Baby brother…? Oh, this will be fun.” Arlong snapped his fingers. “Kuroobi, Chuu, start with the Mink.”

“Gladly,” Kuroobi chuckled. He cracked his knuckles as he and Chuu stepped forward, trying to look as menacing as possible to the young Mink. “What are you doing so far away from home, little one? You want to die that quickly?”

“I am home, with my brothers and sisters and parents,” the Mink said proudly. He charged at the Fish-men and jumped up, letting off a burst of Electro that fried them into shock. Arlong grimaced as he watched the scene—shit, the kid was at least something.

“Over here,” said a voice, and suddenly the rest of the kids seemed to be attacking. Two of the lads tried attacking him with a bat and a spear, while the girls used the distraction to run past him, waving their staffs with purpose. The first Human boy simply stood there, a smirk on his face and his hand outstretched.

“Room… shambles.”

In an instant, everything seemed to go haywire. Arlong’s crew simply fell apart, literally, into bits and pieces and limbs that the girls were easily able to step on and beat with their staffs. Kuroobi and Chuu’s innards had enough and both his lieutenants fainted. The lads that were beating on him got in some decent hits and were able to knock the backs of his knees, sending him to the ground.

…they were just a bunch of children… mostly Human children at that.

“What the hell is going on here?” a voice asked. Arlong looked up and saw a Human couple standing in the street, looking at the scene with… bemusement…?! Did they seriously think this was funny?! He grabbed the lads by their throats and sneered, pinning them in the dust.

“Are these your brats?” he snarled.

“They might be,” the woman said. Ah, it had been her before. “Now what are my wonderful children doing to you Fish-men? You are just passing through, aren’t you?”

“I’m taking over this measly, podunk little town,” Arlong stated. “You Humans need to be put in your place.”

“I can see you are putting us in our place all right,” the man nodded sarcastically. He then glanced past Arlong and huffed in annoyance. “Nami? Sweetie? Swing with your waist and hips, like I showed you.”

“Dad! Not now!”

“Uh… a little help…?” one of the captured lads choked out. The man stepped forward to attack, yet stumbled and tripped over his own feet, landing face-down in the dirt.

“I always have to do everything, don’t I?” the woman smirked. Less than half a second and her knee was connecting with Arlong’s face, subsequently releasing his grip on the teens as he fell on his back. “You two okay?”

“Now we are,” Shachi coughed. “Took you long enough.”

“We were out for a walk, and what the fuck was I supposed to do? Leave your dad to disrupt a bees’ nest and get covered in brambles? At least that shitty Tekkai of yours kicked in, or you’d be dead already.” The woman placed her foot on Arlong’s throat, gently pressing the soft flesh against the ground. “Cocoyasi is not yours, Fish-man.”

“Fuck you,” he spat. “The world was not meant to be ruled by Humans. You should know your place.”

“…and you should know yours.” He reached for his gun, only to find it was not there, somehow replaced by a crooked stick. “I have no problems with Fish-men as a whole, but I have many problems with you. Leave now, or the two of us shall finish what our children started.”

“…and why the fuck should that scare me?”

“…because it’s either leave or have to deal with both the Renegade Marine Captain and the former right-hand of none other than Donquixote Doflamingo, who I’m sure is part of the reason why you didn’t attempt to set up shop in the North.”

Nose broken and pride shattered, Arlong the Saw gathered his crew and sailed away from Cocoyasi, cowed more than he was ever going to admit. That night, a News Coo was summoned, sending a message directly to Marineford, marked of urgent importance.

Investigate potential bribery within the East, it read. A shark paid a mouse, and it would be wise to sniff him out.

Sengoku the Buddha looked at the signature and knew the veracity of the claim without question—he was going to need an inquiry to prove it though, which he was more than happy to commission.

-_-_-_-_-_-_-

Seventeen, eighteen, nineteen, thirteen; that’s how old Law, Shachi, Penguin, and Bepo were when they decided they were going to leave Cocoyasi. The four brothers packed up their stuff and prepped a boat that they were going to take to the Red Line—then the adventure would truly begin.

“It’s not fair!” Nami sobbed. She was being cradled gently by Cora, as the entire family was at the docks to wish the boys off. “I’m good at fighting and at navigation! Why can’t I come?!”

“We don’t need two navigators—that’s just dumb,” Shachi reasoned. It still wasn’t enough for his baby sister, who kept crying into Cora’s shoulder. “We can’t have any crybabies onboard! It’ll cramp our style!”

“…but you’re bringing Bepo-nii!”

“Sorry…”

“Listen, Nami, we’re going back to the Blue where we were born,” Law explained. Cora put the girl down and the teen let her hug him tightly around the middle. “I don’t think you really want to go there—it’s not a place where you can wear shorts all the time.”

“I still want to go…!”

“Listen: your time will come soon enough. Until then,” he leaned down and whispered in her ear, “I need you to help Mom and Nojiko watch after Dad, okay? It’s a full-time job watching over his clumsy ass.”

She giggled—it was a start.

“We’re both going to learn lots of different things!” Bepo said excitedly. “We’ll meet up again out in the Grand Line, and we’re going to have to compare notes!”

“We will…?”

“The two best navigators in the world can only rely on each other, after all!”

“Just keep a lookout for us in the papers, okay?” Penguin said.

“What are you going to be called?” Nojiko asked.

“The Heart Pirates,” Law said frankly. “I’m a doctor, and we’re Dad’s kids. He used to be referred to as ‘the Heart’ when he was undercover.”

“Not to mention love,” Cora said. He tried to keep his composure, but tears still began to stream down his face. “You can’t forget to love.”

“Great,” Bell-mère laughed. “Now he’s going to be all weepy the rest of the week. Thanks a lot, assholes.”

“You know it’s about you too,” Cora said. “The love we gave them made a difference in their lives, and there’s nothing any of us can do to change that.”

“Maybe you should listen to her and just let us go,” Shachi said. “Don’t worry, Dad. You still got Mom, Nojiko, and Nami, right?”

Cora suddenly became very much so unable to talk, as tears became outright sobbing. Bell-mère punched Shachi’s shoulder before bringing the lad in for a hug. Slowly, they all joined in until the entire family of eight was wrapped in one another.

“No matter where you are, write to us!” Nojiko demanded. “We want to know what’s out there too!”

“Don’t worry, Nojicakes; we’ll let you know we’re still alive every now and then.” Penguin ruffled her hair and she pouted—how dare he use that name at a time like this.

After more crying and belated goodbyes, the newly-formed Heart Pirates disappeared into the horizon, their sisters watching as their boat grew smaller and smaller, until there was nothing left. The sun set and the two girls trudged back from the pier, into the open arms of their parents, painfully aware of how quiet the house now was, and would be for a while yet.

-_-_-_-_-_-_-

Bell-mère noticed a distinct change in her youngest child’s demeanor and she wasn’t entirely sure she liked it. Every day the girl went to the north end of the island and sat, looking out over the water as though searching for something, for someone, and it was beginning to become annoying.

“Talk to her,” she told Cora one day. She put a new bushel next to where he was sitting, having been banished there after dropping four other baskets of the fruit. The man stopped sorting mikan and raised an eyebrow at her.

“Why me?”

“Because, she knows you’re wrapped around her finger.” Well, that was true, but it was true of Cora and all six of their kids. “I also can’t tell her shit without being a hypocrite—by the time I was her age, I already was causing trouble.”

Ah… no wonder. He stood upright and stretched, attempting to shake sorting duties from his limbs. “Nojiko, can you please continue sorting for me? I have to go fetch your sister.”

“Okay, Dad!”

His heart still warmed a little bit every time she called him that, the wonderful feeling never quite dulling with use. He gave Bell-mère a quick kiss before wandering down the lane in search of their daughter.

Sure enough, Nami was there at the northernmost point of the island, sitting with her knees drawn up and a yearning expression on her face. Cora sat down next to her in silence, letting the sea breeze wash over them for a bit before speaking.

“You really want to go that badly, don’t you?” he asked. She did not reply. “It’s dangerous out there, my little wave, and the rest of us don’t want you getting swept away.”

“Bepo-nii’s not that much older than me,” she said. “They didn’t even bring Noji-nee and she’s older than him!”

“Your brothers were all living alone for a while before they ended up with me,” Cora explained. “They know what it takes to live on their own, how strong someone has to be—you don’t yet, which is a good thing.”

“How…?”

“It means your mom got you at the right time.” He tucked some strands of hair behind her ear so that he could see her face more clearly. “You’ll get out there one day; you just haven’t met the right people to take you yet.”

“Who could I possibly go with besides my brothers?!”

“That’s something we’ll all find out when the time comes,” he said. “For the time being, though, you have to help in the grove and keep at your studies. What will happen if you run into Bepo and forgot how to draw a map?”

The girl shrugged sullenly. “He’d be disappointed, I guess.” She thought for a moment, then turned towards him, her brown eyes impossibly wide. “Can you teach me how to fight? So that I can leave one day?”

“You want to learn how to fight…? Nami, sweetie, you’re not a fighter… not that way. You’re no soldier.”

“No, but I need to be able to hold my own. You and Mom were both strong Marines! You can teach me!”

“I, uh, think this is a conversation we need to be having at home, with your mom…”

“Oh, come on Dad! Please, please, please, please, pleeaasssseee…!” the tween begged. She gave him the saddest eyes possible and he wavered.

Shit.

-_-_-_-_-_-_-

“What?! Absolutely not!” Bell-mère scolded later that night over dinner. Her younger daughter was picking sourly at her peas, while the elder was wisely remaining quiet. “Nami, you’re not a soldier. Dad and I can’t be teaching you Marine level shit just because you asked nicely!”

“Peng-nii and Sach-nii are pretty pathetic and they got training before they left.”

“Penguin and Shachi got training before they left because they are teenagers who knew they needed something in order to keep up with Law and Bepo, a Devil Fruit user and a Mink,” Bell-mère stated. “You are an eleven year old Human girl with no extraordinary powers useful in battle.”

“What if Arlong comes back while they’re gone!” Nami insisted. She slammed her hands on the table in anger. “Law-nii’s not here to make it easy anymore!”

“Then Dad and I will have to take care of things,” Bell-mère said gravely. She glared across the table at Cora, who seemed to want to shrink in his chair and disappear. “See what you started?”

“What if we both did it?” Nojiko asked quietly. Bell-mère turned her attention to her older daughter, unsure if she should shut her down or hear her out. “That way there’s always someone our size to spar with—Nami’s almost the same height as me now anyhow.”

“You both are better than this,” Bell-mère said. “One look at you using Rokushiki and the Marine recruiters will be on your asses to join up… at best.”

“I… don’t think they care,” Cora said. They watched as the girls both looked at one another with downturned faces, trying to be sneaky about it. Bell-mère rubbed at her temple, knowing a headache was coming on.

For fuck’s sake; she wanted better than this for them.

-_-_-_-_-_-_-

Dad, Mom, Nojiko, Nami,

We made it back to the beginning, where we all met. Everything’s very much the same. Animals seem to have taken care of the Birdcage victims, so it’s better on Bepo’s nose, but the rest of Minion Island is hauntingly familiar. There is very little here. There were a few things hidden from our first time on the island—we’re calling it our first set of loot.

We’re off tomorrow to get a ship from a man Penguin and Shachi used to know. Let’s hope this pans out.

I love you.

Law

-_-_-_-_-_-_-

Screeching happily, Nami ran out of the house while waving the paper around. It was Nojiko’s turn to help in the orchard, so all three of the people she needed to see were out there.

“What the fuck are you screaming about?” Bell-mère asked, suddenly missing the ability to smoke. Nami crinkled the newspaper as she held it up.

“They did it! They did it!”

“They did what?” Cora asked. He took the newspaper from her and grinned devilishly at the article. It wasn’t front-page, but it was something.

NEW ROOKIE PIRATES IN NORTH – HEART PIRATES MAKE SPLASHY SCENE

There, next to the article, was a photo of a flooded palace, absolutely ruined by the pirates in-question. No bounties had been officially issued against the miscreants, but there was an impending one of an undisclosed amount for the leader soon as a proper photograph could be procured.

His sweet, darling sons sure were growing up fast.

“Give me that,” Bell-mère said, snatching the paper. Two moments and she was howling with laughter.

“What’s so funny?” Nojiko frowned. She looked at the paper and her brow furrowed. “They’re just getting in trouble.”

“The right kind of trouble,” Cora explained. “You know the country Law was from? The nobility fled there. Something tells me they’re not done, either.”

Both girls looked at their father and saw something sad on his face, but something happy as well. They figured it would make sense later, but for now, they were just glad to know that their brothers weren’t captured.

-_-_-_-_-_-_-

Dad,

Law is getting tattoos and it’s my duty as the eldest to both try to talk him out of it and to tattle when that doesn’t work. Guess what didn’t work?

He’s scary. Why did you let us leave with him again?

-_-_-_-_-_-_-

Nami,

Here’s some neat pens I found! I got us matching sets, since we have a little extra from our latest haul, and mine already work great! The nibs hold wonderfully to pressure, though I suggest you try writing or drawing something silly first before using it on an actual map. They actually seem to adjust themselves to compensate for paper weight and texture…? Please test it yourself and let me know if it does it for you too.

-_-_-_-_-_-_-

Mom,

So, you know how when you were teaching us what you know about Rokushiki and Shachi and I couldn’t quite get what was going on with Rankyaku? We were swimming in the ocean today and, well, I think it finally kicked in. Literally. Ha. I don’t think I’ve ever swam faster in my entire life, and it still didn’t tire me out! We’re still not good at the others, but Rankyaku… this could be something really big for us! I wanted to let you know because… well… thank you. It still means a lot, you know, what you and Dad did. All of it. Just because it’s not front and center all the time doesn’t mean it didn’t matter.

-_-_-_-_-_-_-

It was a lovely, quiet evening as Bell-mère and Cora sat together on a bench on the edge of the mikan grove. The breeze off the ocean was cool and all they heard was the nighttime bugs and frogs and other critters that scurried about while the sun was down.

“I’m worried,” Cora said lowly, his grip around Bell-mère’s waist tightening. “The papers are still saying that Doffy is in Dressrosa… that he’s a Warlord…”

“Ignore it,” she replied. “He’s a worthless sack of shit.”

“Yeah, but he’s still my brother… I feel a sort of responsibility for not finishing the job…”

“…a job which the old goat should have never sent you on,” she reminded him. “At least you know Vergo was decommissioned and locked away—his reach isn’t what it was.”

“…what I know of it, anyhow.” He pressed a kiss to her head—peach fuzz growing back in from when she last shaved and shaped it—and exhaled heavily as he lingered. “If I know Doffy, he’s figuring out a way to blackmail Law into becoming the next Corazón…”

“Don’t think about that,” Bell-mère ordered gently. “Our boys are better than to let that happen. Besides, you haven’t officially gone by your family name—let alone your real name—in a while. You can just fade here with me, being a farmer, letting those made of better stuff take care of him.”

“Belle, we were some of the best…”

“…and what that fuck deserves is to rot in the bottom of Impel Down until he’s good and dead. You can’t get to him in order to haul his ass there without getting yourself killed, while I’d just kill him outright. Maybe letting him think he can trick Law will end up being his downfall.”

“He is extremely charismatic and persuasive…”

“The boy also knows he’s a piece of shit,” she reminded him. “We raised those boys to be better than him, Rosi. They’re not stupid… even the stupid ones.”

They both laughed at that, knowing that she was completely right.

-_-_-_-_-_-_-

Noji-nee,

How is Nami doing? I know it’s rude to open with that, but I need to write it down before I forget! There was something about her last letter that seemed off. Is it that she started Girl Stuff too? You know I won’t tease her like our eldest brothers. I just want to make sure she’s okay. She’s the only one of us younger than me, you know.

How about you? Are your studies still okay? Any funny stories? Please tell me you went out with that boy from the island over… Heim…? I can’t find your other letter for reference. PLEASE tell me you went out with him. I have beri riding on this. For the record, I can’t blame you not wanting to date until well after we left—Peng-nii and Sach-nii are bad enough when it comes to Ikkaku. Oh, yeah, we got a gal on the crew a while back and she can get scary, but she usually isn’t because our brothers will be like that for her. Even Law-nii will get in on it, but that’s just how he is. He tries to act like a hardened criminal and jaded war orphan and… well… although that’s not wrong, I’m sure he doesn’t really hide his soft spots as well as he thinks he does.

Garachu.

-_-_-_-_-_-_-

Dad,

We’ve been in Spider Miles for a few days now. I’ve been avoiding coming here for as long as possible, but we needed a part for the ship that we could only really get here and… it’s rough. A couple people have definitely noticed and recognized me, especially around the old headquarters. It’s been abandoned for a few years now. No one wants to go near it because they say that bad spirits manifest there… always have. Maybe that was part of what was going on, in some way. At the very least, it didn’t help.

The bedroom I shared with Buffalo, Baby 5, and Dellinger was still intact. Don’t tell anyone else, but I laid down on my old bed and cried. It was dusty and smelled foul, but it gave a weird sense of closure. That’s… well… that’s why I wanted to write you, because I know you’d like to know I’ve been getting some closure while I’m here. I don’t know what was darker—here or my last days in Flevance—but no matter what, it’s making me stronger.

Give my love to Mom, Nojiko, and Nami. Sometimes, I think about everyone and smile wide, just like you did before you closed the trunk. I love you all.

-_-_-_-_-_-_-

“Dad…? Do we have any other family…?”

Cora-san glanced over at Nojiko, who was sitting at the low table in the sitting room with her schoolwork splayed out in front of her, taking up only about a third of the space thanks to Nami’s cartography practice. He and Bell-mère were cuddled up on the couch, attempting to make the best of a naturally-quiet afternoon.

“Why do you ask that?” he replied. She shrugged.

“I remember Uncle Genzo saying once that you have a dad. Is that true?”

After looking to Bell-mère for assistance—the shit was soundly asleep—Cora shrugged. “He’s my dad a lot like I’m your dad: circumstances and want. I haven’t seen him in years.”

“Why…?”

“He lives on the Grand Line—he’s difficult to get to.” The man felt better knowing he wasn’t telling his daughters a complete lie. “My birth parents died long ago, when I was just a kid. Younger than you were when I first brought your brothers here.”

“…because of Uncle Doffy, right?” Cora and Nojiko both looked at Nami, whose eyes hadn’t even lifted from the map before her. “I heard Law-nii talk about him when he thought I wasn’t around. The boys tried to keep him a secret.”

“Oh, is that what the guy Dad and Law-nii used to work for liked to be called? In the Family?”

“He is literally your uncle,” Cora said gravely. His daughters both stared at him, clearly taken aback. “Doflamingo and I might have had the same parents when we were small, but he is nothing like the rest of us. He is sick in the head. If at any time someone approaches you claiming to be him, or sent by him, do not indulge them and get one of us immediately. I don’t care how good you’ve been getting in your training—get your mom or me, preferably both. Do you both understand?”

Both teens nodded silently.

“Good.” He offered them both a soft smile and put a sound barrier on Bell-mère, who was now snoring. “Maybe one day you can meet the dad I have now. He lives at Marine Headquarters and is a stubborn old man.”

“We can’t tell him about our brothers then, huh?” Nojiko chuckled. Cora shook his head.

“Nah—he needs to know about all his grandchildren and their insane ways,” the man smirked. “In time, though. We don’t want to shock him too much, after all.”

-_-_-_-_-_-_-

Bell-mère double-checked the amount of bills she was given before handing her customer some change. With a freak storm coming over the Red Line and freezing some of the other Eastern mikan crops, Cocoyasi was busy with travelers wishing to restock their citrus supplies and storekeepers wanting to simply keep up with their normal demand. The man before her was one of the former—the chef of a passenger ship whose patrons were now wandering the city with curiosity and delight.

“Pleasure doing business with you,” she replied. “Want some help loading the goods?”

“If you have help, that would be nice—bad back and all,” the chef said. He waited until after Bell-mère came back with a cart, on which Nojiko and Cora began to load the crates of fruit. “Couldn’t enlist in the Marines because of it, so it’s why I like to give to veteran-owned businesses.”

“It’s not as glorious as it’s cracked up to be,” Bell-mère shrugged. “It might have been for some, but I’m willing to tell you that from my experience, you’re not missing much. Actually, you might be saving yourself a lot of hassle thanks to that back of yours.” She watched a flicker of confusion pass over the man’s face—he was clearly much more used to former military personnel who were all bluster and enjoyed subtly revising their own recollections of events… or worse. “I still appreciate the business. You’ll be coming back for the quality, not to worship what I did in a past life.”

“Mom’s modest,” Nojiko interjected, “but she’s not wrong. My parents don’t sugarcoat things because it would be a disservice otherwise.” The teen then took a piece of paper from a box and handed it to the chef. “A map of the area—make sure you give it to the ship’s navigator.”

“Uh… thanks…” The man awkwardly looked at the map—honestly more ad than map thanks to the prominence of the grove—and raised an eyebrow. “This is really good. Who’d you have make this?”

“My daughter,” Bell-mère said. The chef looked at Nojiko and both teen and mother laughed. “No, my younger daughter. Fifteen and has long been a steady hand.”

“Does she… take orders…? I think the captain might be interested in her charting a map to use for the customers.”

“That’s something the captain’s going to have to ask her,” Cora stated, a tinge of darkness to his voice. “Our daughter doesn’t just do things for anyone, you know.”

“Of course, of course…” He bowed his head as Nojiko went to pull the cart along. “I’ll let the captain know who to talk to if interested.”

“Much obliged—don’t be a stranger.” Bell-mère and Cora then watched as the chef and Nojiko walked back into town, with Bell-mère landing a firm smack on Cora’s rear once they were out of earshot.

“Whoa! What was that for?!”

“It’s for ‘Nami’s practicing at the north shore and Nojiko will be occupied for at least half an hour’,” she replied. “You getting all protective was kind of hot.”

“It’s what a dad does… what parents do…”

“Still doesn’t mean I don’t want you up those stairs so you can get under me.”

-_-_-_-_-_-_-

We need your help Gingersnap,

Please take this ring and sneakily give it to Dad. He wants it for Mom. I guess the gem is stone from the island where they met? Nojicakes likes to IGNORE MY MAIL and I can’t send it right to Dad or risk Mom getting it instead. Same would happen if Penguin sent it, Bepo can’t keep a secret, and Law’s acting funny about it, so… ta-da! We’re it.

If they get married in the meantime, remember that you’re our favorite and we need lots of photos. Don’t tell Nojicakes I told you that. I mean, I’m sure she’s figured it out, since you’re the youngest, and she knows we still love her too, but telling her is still mean.

You’re still the favorite and we’re counting on you. Lots of photos.

-_-_-_-_-_-_-

Bell-mère and Cora were, indeed, married soon after the latter went down on one knee and presented the former with the ring their children helped them acquire. Genzo was the one who coached them through their vows as they wore their best suits, while Nojiko and Nami threw orange blossom petals in the air. The entire village ended up coming out for the party, which lasted well into the night and they collectively needed a whole weekend to recover from. They finally made honest people of each other, and it simply felt right.

Yes, plenty of snail-photos were taken. No, Nami absolutely refused to send any to her brothers.

-_-_-_-_-_-_-

Law-nii,

It’s so odd, how hard it still is adjusting to the fact that you four are not here even though it’s been years. Every so often I feel like the house is too quiet, too clean, too big for it to be the four of us who are left. Yeah, Nami’s moved out of my room, but at the same time, there is a decided lack in the goons bickering, or Bepo sobbing at someone’s teasing, or your extremely deadpan comments. I never thought I’d ever say this, but I actually miss your sense of humor. At least you were the only one around here with a constantly-functioning brain. Nami honestly doesn’t count because her map thing is an obsession. Then… you know… Mom is Mom and Dad is Dad. The idiots are just that and Bepo is too precious. No further explaining needed.

Enclosed is a photo, as requested. Now promise to keep it safe, alright? It’s just a copy, but I really don’t think Dad wants there to be a photo of himself wandering around, especially one taken with his wife and daughters on his wedding day. I’ve sent one to Grandfather as well, through the direct emergency channel Mom sent him the message about those Fish-men, which I’m sure is about to go over as well as Dad in a deep puddle. After this, I want no ribbing about how Nami’s clearly the favorite. If it wasn’t for me, you four likely would only know a quarter of what does on around here.

By the way, Ikka-chan wins the bet. She promised to write me what the results are when you announce them, so no cheating you big dummy. You have to bring the crew here when you’ve got a nice break in your travels—her and I need to have some Very Serious Girl Time to negate the fact I’m sure the ship smells like Shachi’s feet and Wet Bepo and too many farts to count.

I can only hope my brothers are missing me just as much as I’m missing them.

-_-_-_-_-_-_-

“…and why are you two loitering on my porch this time?” Genzo asked. The two teens didn’t even look at him, with Nojiko continuing her book and Nami laying on her back with her arms spread out and gaze glued to the support beams of the porch’s roof. “It can’t be that bad.”

“We can’t even work in the grove,” Nami shuddered. “They’re just there… going at one another like they’re trying to make it so I’m no longer the baby of the family. No sex after marriage is a myth, apparently.”

Genzo paused at that. “Please tell me they move it into the house.”

“Oh, they stick to their room,” Nojiko supplied coolly, “but considering Mom is the only person who can get Dad to lose control of his Devil Fruit ability, and the knowledge of what is happening even when it is silent…”

“Ah.” The man shifted uncomfortably before nodding in commiseration. “If it’s any consolation, I’m sure Bell-mère would rather cut off a foot than gain another kid by any method other than adoption-via-kidnapping.”

“It’s the only thing stopping us from running away,” Nami deadpanned. “Sach-nii was eighteen when he left, and Law-nii wasn’t that much older than sixteen—we could make it.”

“A navigator and an assistant manager of an orchard does not a crew make,” Genzo chuckled. “Look: I know you feel like you are ready to leave, but just give it a bit more time, alright? There’s plenty to do on the island that doesn’t involve being anywhere near your parents while… they… test their bed frame.”

All three shuddered. It should have been a crime for them to think about such things.

[papermoonloveslucy]

KIDZ!

The Young People of the Lucyverse ~ Part 3

W.C. Fields famously warned performers never to work with children or animals. Luckily for us, Lucille Ball consistently disregarded his advice. Here’s a look at some of the young performers and characters of the Lucyverse.

“Lucy and the Drive-In Movie” (1969) ~ Jackie Berry is a married friend of Kim’s who has a newborn named Wendy. Her husband is said to be in the service. Jackie Berry uses her married name for the character. She ws the real-life wife of Ken Berry from 1960 to 1972, an actor championed by Lucille Ball. 

“Lucy and Jack Benny’s Biography” (1970) ~ Lucy plays Jack’s mother and  Michael Barbera plays Benny as a boy. Barbera was a child actor who was 12 years old at the time of filming. He accrued 18 screen credits before leaving the industry.

“Lucy Cuts Vincent’s Price” (1970) ~ Lucy says she previously talked on the phone to Mrs. Vincent Price when arranging entertainment for a big party the Price’s threw. In 1970, Vincent Price was married to costume designer Mary Grant (inset photo), although her name is never mentioned here. Making small talk on the telephone, Lucy asks about Little Vicki. This is a reference to the Price’s 8 year-old daughter, Victoria. Although Lucy visits their home, both characters remain off-screen.

“Lucy the Laundress” (1970) ~ Lucy smashes into a laundry truck. In order to pay for the repairs, she has to go to work at the laundry and encounters the owner’s two daughters Sue Chin Wong (left) and Linda Change Wong (right). Linda is played by Rosalind Chao who makes her screen debut with this episode. She created the role of Soon-Ye Klinger on “M*A*S*H” and “After M*A*S*H” but is perhaps best known for playing Keiko O'Brien on “Star Trek: The Next Generation” and “Deep Space Nine.” During that series she also filmed The Joy Luck Club. More recent credits include “Blackish,” “This is Us,” and “The Catch.”  Heather Lee (Sue Chin Wong) makes her screen appearance in this episode. When Lucy meets the sisters, she greets them in an exaggerated and condescending Chinese accent. The girls look horrified and answer back in voices totally devoid of any Asian influence. To further the humor of Lucy’s backward thinking, the girls are eating hamburgers with ketchup, a typical American-style meal.

“Lucy and Ma Parker” (1970) ~ A criminal mastermind (Carole Cook) enlists two little people (Jerry Marin and Billy Curtis) to play her ‘children’. Milton (Marin) is dressed as ‘Little Mildred’ in the style of child star Shirley Temple. Curtis plays Herman Golab, who is dressed as Buster Brown.  

“Lucy and the Italian Bombshell” (1971) ~ Harry’s former flame Donna Colucci (Kaye Ballard) is married and has a large brood of children: Ricardo, Anna Maria, Louisa, Luigi, Vincenzo, Dino, Lucrezia, Alfredo Jr., Margarito, Bruno, Rosa, and Frederico - all of whom appear uncredited.

“Lucy and Donny Osmond” (1972) ~ Lucy takes her pre-teen niece Patricia (Eve Plumb) to see her favorite singer, Donny Osmond. Plumb is probably best known as the middle daughter, Jan, on TV’s “The Brady Bunch” (1969-74). She filmed this episode simultaneously with “The Brady Bunch” which aired Friday nights on ABC. This is her only time acting with Lucille Ball.  Coincidentally, Desi Arnaz Jr. made a guest-appearance on “The Brady Bunch” in 1970 where he was the ‘dream date’ of Jan’s sister Marcia (Maureen McCormick). 

“Lucy and Her Prince Charming” (1972) ~ Harry hastily arranges a home wedding ceremony for Lucy and a Prince (Ricardo Montalban) - including a flower girl and a ring bearer - played by two uncredited young actors. 

Mame (1974) ~ Lucille Ball plays Auntie Mame to orphaned Patrick Dennis, played by Bruce Dern as a child. 

“Life With Lucy” (1986) ~ Lucy Barker and Curtis McGibbon (Gale Gordon) are grandparents to Becky and Kevin McGibbon. Becky is played by Jenny Lewis. Ten year-old Lewis appeared in all 13 episodes, only 8 of which were aired.

“Yes, Lucy was a bit rough around the edges, and yes, she constantly smoked cigarettes on the set. She would pull her face back with tape, sort of like a cheap face-lift.“ ~ JENNY LEWIS

Philip Amelio (Kevin McGibbon) made his screen debut on “Life With Lucy” at the age of 10. He played Stephen Baldwin’s younger self in the film Born on the Fourth of July (1989). He gave up acting by his early teensPhilip died in  2005 at the age of 27 due to a mis-diagnosed bacterial infection. 

Kelli Martin (right) played Becky’s friend Patty in two episodes of the series. Born in 1975, she made her acting debut at age 7 and went on to be seen as an Emmy-nominated regular on “Life Goes On” (1989-93) and “Christy” (1994-95) in which she played the title character. 

BONUS KIDZ! 

“Lucy the Diamond Cutter” (1970) ~ German diamond cutter Gustav (Wally Cox) calls Kim and Craig “the Katzenjammer Kids.” The Katzenjammer Kids was a comic strip created by German immigrant Rudolph Dirks which appeared from 1897 to 2006. The strip featured twins Hans and Fritz, who rebelled against authority. 

“Lucy and the Generation Gap” (1969) ~ In the final sequence of the musical episode set in outer space, the Carters sing “Kids” a song written by Lee Adams and Charles Strouse for the 1960 Broadway musical Bye Bye Birdie. The musical was filmed in 1963. This song is originally about the generation gap, so it requires the least lyrical changes. It was sung on stage and screen by Paul Lynde, playing the father of free-thinking kids obsessed with an Elvis-like rock and roll singer.  

[valkyrhys]

happy holidays to my favorite author!!!!

saw the last ask you answered about Haden & Penny at Christmas and it got me thinking about the brady bunch of kiddos that outnumber their parents - how over the top does uncle Niko go to spoil the brood?

looking forward (eventually) to more in their universe bc your characters are *chef’s kiss* and I am here for the navarrodeo for the long haul

hi, happy new year! I'm shook because Navarrodeo is the best thing I've ever heard and I will be def using it from now on.

Uncle Niko absolutely spoils the kids, but not with material things. He's the one who sneaks them out into the woods, shows them how to use various weaponry, and lets them take a sip of whatever he's drinking. But he's also the one who tells them the scary stories that have them huddled together under the covers at night, racing into their parents' room begging to sleep with them whenever the wind whips at the windows.

thank you so much for the kind words!!! <3

[90363462]

The Shocking Truth Behind Gisele and Tom Brady’s Divorce Drama – And Why We All Relate

Shaoni DasOctober 29, 2022

All is not well in the Brady household. The two have officially finalized their divorce after over a decade of marriage.

For years Tom Brady and Gisele Bündchen have been regarded as one of the most influential, formidable couples of the 21st century. He’s an NFL legend, the most decorated player in football history with a wealth of accolades, records, and Superbowl victories to his name, whereas she’s a former supermodel, a veritable bombshell who rose through the ranks of the modeling hierarchy to earn millions of dollars and establish herself as the foremost ambassador to her native Brazil. They were a match made in heaven, something most ordinary folks could only imagine for themselves as they looked with equal parts envy and aspiration. 

RELATED: What Drew Barrymore’s Surprising Post-Divorce Celibacy Can Teach Us About Love

However, it appears there is trouble in paradise. Since the beginning of 2022, rumors have been abounding regarding the status of Brady and Gisele’s marriage and whether they’re heading down splitsville. Though nothing has been confirmed by either party at the time of writing, Gisele has gone on record as of late to express dissatisfaction with her current state of affairs. 

Therefore, let’s take the time to understand the nuances of their marital woes, particularly from Gisele’s perspective, and what we might be able to learn from them in this time of chaos. 

Gisele Reveals The Sacrifices She Made For Tom Brady

In Gisele’s view, she has done her utmost to fulfill her commitment to Brady and the family they’ve built together. When she married Brady in 2009, she’d been at the pinnacle of her career and was only slated to expand her brand. However, when you exchange vows with someone, there are elements of sacrifice involved, even if it’s something you happily go through in the name of the ‘greater good.’ At the time of their union, both Brady and Gisele came to a mutual agreement: she was going to be the primary caretaker of their three children (including her stepson Jack), and he was going to be the principal breadwinner. Nothing about this arrangement was official per se, but it’s a compromise Gisele made with absolute conviction. 

So, Gisele did the necessary: she scaled back her professional engagements, packed her bags and moved to Boston, and devoted herself to nurturing and raising her growing family — just like any good housewife and mother would do. To be fair, she doesn’t regret a single thing, as it was fulfilling for both herself and her children to experience those special years during their upbringing. “I’m so grateful to have been there in those moments that were really shaping who they are as people,” she told Elle. 

RELATED: What Happened to Anna Marie Tendler After Her Divorce from John Mulaney?

However, now that the brood is older, Gisele is envisioning a comeback — or, more accurately, a revival —in the public consciousness. 

At 42, the Brazilian native has bigger dreams, more clarity, and tons of gusto to bring her vision into being. For starters, she wants to help global initiatives against climate change and pollution, especially with her homeland being such a focal point of environmental activism. She also has her eye on more extensive philanthropic work, such, such as universal education and healthcare relief. Her next project is a travel series highlighting Brazil’s diverse ecosystems. 

The former Victoria’s Secret star has plenty on her agenda, and she needs both the time and the space to see through these items. Ideally, this shouldn’t have been an issue at all — Brady was to have retired at the beginning of 2022, which would have enabled Gisele to carry out these endeavors. However, despite announcing retirement on February 1, 2022, Brady announced 40 days later that he would be part of the Buccaneers squad for the 2022 season. 

Gisele’s Perspective On Tom Brady’s Un-Retirement

His short-lived retirement instigated a flurry of speculation and memes in the press, and understandably so. The 45-year-old has achieved everything there is to achieve in football — what more is there to experience? Not to mention, the injuries will only accelerate with age. Also, doesn’t he want to make up for lost time and be a present dad for his children? Unfortunately, Brady never truly delved into why he un-retired; in his initial statement, he said, “These past two months I’ve realized my place is still on the field and not in the stands.”

RELATED: Find Your Strength in Times of Pain: Divorce Quotes for Her

From Gisele’s point of view, it’s a tricky situation. On the one hand, she values Brady’s ambition and wants him to be happy no matter what. On the other hand, as she said, “this is a very violent sport,” and she would like Brady to “be more present” in their children’s lives. 

At the end of the day, she can’t force him to do anything; she can only present her case and hope he can see her perspective and take the necessary measures. “But ultimately, I feel that everybody has to make a decision that works for [them]. He needs to follow his joy, too,” she said. 

Gisele has reached a point in her marriage where she has to be a little ‘selfish,’ so to speak, and reassess what she wants from Brady and their partnership. “I’ve done my part, which is [to] be there for [Tom],” she shared. She uprooted her life and spent every bit of her energy creating a warm, loving atmosphere for her children to grow up in. She couldn’t be prouder of them, but, at the same time, she does foresee a fork in her path. She is at a critical juncture in her journey and needs to decide how she wants to spend the next decade. “I have a huge list of things that I have to do, that I want to do,” she said. “At 42, I feel more connected with my purpose.”

So what next for Brady and Gisele? Though the model concluded the interview on a somewhat ambiguous note, reports in the media indicate that their marriage is on the rocks. In September, it was reported that they had been living apart for more than a few months, whereas in October, PageSixannounced that both Brady and Gisele had hired divorce lawyers amid the hearsay. Brady has also been spotted without his wedding band as of late. 

What Gisele Teaches Us About Fighting For Our Joys

There’s no way to predict the future: Brady and Gisele may very well divorce, or perhaps, they might find a way to salvage something out of this impossible situation. What we can take away from this travesty is the significance of drawing lines in our interpersonal relationships. 

RELATED: How Tiger Woods’ Ex-Wife, Elin Nordegren, Is Doing, 11 Years After Their Scandalous Divorce

There’s no way you can sacrifice everything for the other person — it’s a surefire way to get taken advantage of, lose your peace, and waste your time. Gisele has no regrets about her choices, yet she is still drawing those lines to find her happiness. We can’t all have everything we want, but at least we can still fight for some of our joys. 

KEEP READING: 

Brad Pitt Opens Up On Life Post-Divorce – and Shows Us How To Overcome Heartbreak

Shaoni Das

Shaoni Das is a writer based out of Alberta, Canada. Copywriter by day, true crime enthusiast by night - she has a passion for uncovering perspectives that capture the full spectrum of human nature. She deploys language as a way to connect with her audience and empower them to take action. When she's not writing or scouring the internet for ideas, you can find her playing Genshin Impact or eating Biriyani.

[infinitelytheheartexpands]

Lucia di Lammermoor (old film version from the 70s or something with Anna Moffo): Reactions, Part II

Baritone Brooding TM

you perhaps should have planned this earlier than, idk, the day of the wedding

normanno get your creepy ass and cringe hat out of here

SHE

YES GIRL CALL HIM AND HIS SEXIST BULLSHIT OUT

gaslight gatekeep girlboss or something like that

y’all donizetti just hard slaps

high note and collapse: the quintessential soprano combo

also why did they cut the Lucia/Raimondo duet

and yet you all look sullen

that reminds me: STILL TOO BRIGHT 

hahaha that’s hilarious 

pretty dress at least

noooooooo

most Tenor TM entrance ever but why does he have backup and also why does he just casually stroll in here

best i could do for brady bunch-style cutaways with what’s provided

yeah you fucked up you bastard

LOVE THIS SEXTET

damage control

WELP

EDGARDO WHAT THE FUCK

why is this tempo so slow

at least we get cool shots like this i guess

spark of madness

[mceproductions]

Dancing the Year Away (Countdown Recap)

Before I sum up 2023 We'll look back on the past 30 days Countdown wise.

Best of 2023

Movies

1.  Mission Impossible - Dead Reckoning: Part One

2.  Oppenheimer

3.  The Super Mario Bros Movie

4.  Spider-Man: Across the Spider-Verse

5.  Barbie

6.  Suzume

7.  John Wick: Chapter 4

8.  Guardians of the Galaxy Vol. 3

9.  Killers of the Flower Moon

10. The Hunger Games: The Ballad of Songbirds and Snakes

11. Elemental and The Flash

12. Fast X

13. Wonka

14. M3GAN

15. The Marvels

Runners Up:

A Man Called Otto

Shazam: Fury of the Gods

Indiana Jones and the Dial of Destiny

TMNT: Mutant Mayhem

80 For Brady

Worst:

1. Winnie the Pooh: Blood and Honey

2. Expend4bles

3. Ant Man and the Wasp: Quantumania

Honorable Mention:

Puss in Boots: The Last Wish

TV

Best New Show of 2023 Nominee*   Winner^

1.  Star Trek Picard (Paramount+)

2.  The Last of Us (HBO)^

3.  Succession (HBO)

4.  The Daily Show (Comedy Central)

5.  The Late Show with Stephen Colbert (CBS)

6.  Yellowstone (Paramount TV)

7.  The Mandalorian (Disney+)

8.  Abbott Elementary (ABC)

9.  Late Night with Seth Meyers (NBC)

10. Loki (Disney+)

11. SNL (NBC)

12. That 90’s Show (NETFLIX)*

13. My Hero Academia (ADULT SWIM)

14. Last Week Tonight with John Oliver (HBO) and Real Time with Bill Maher (HBO)

15. Ahsoka (Disney+)*

16. Attack On Titan: The Final Chapters (Crunchyroll/ADULT SWIM)

17. The Good Doctor (ABC)

18. The Owl House (Disney)

19. TONIKAWA: Over the Moon for You (Crunchyroll) and

Outlander (Starz)

20. My Adventures with Superman (ADULT SWIM)*

21. It’s Always Sunny in Philadelphia (FXX)

22. 1923 (Paramount+)

23. RWBY (Crunchyroll)

24. One Piece (NETFLIX)*

25. The Simpsons (FOX)

Runners Up:

Tomo-Chan is A Girl (Crunchyroll)

Oshi No Ko (HI-DIVE)

The Walking Dead: Dead City and Daryl Dixon (AMC)

Young Sheldon (CBS)

Jimmy Kimmel Live (ABC)

Worst:

1. Velma (MAX)

2. Secret Invasion (Disney+)

3. Gotham Knights (CW)

Honorable Mention:

Star Trek Lower Decks and Strange New Worlds (Paramount+)

Music

1. Dua Lipa “Dance The Night”

2. MindaRyn “Way to Go”

3. Morgan Wallen “Last Night”

4. Jack Black “Peaches”

5. Miley Cyrus “Flowers”

6.  NSYNC “Better Place”

7.  Taylor Swift “Karma”

8.  Radwimps and Toaka “SUZUME”

9.  Ed Sheeran “Eyes Closed”

10. Jason Aldean “Try That in a Small Town”

11. Ludwig Goransson “Can You Hear The Music”

12. Olivia Rodrigo “Vampire”

13. Halle Bailey “Part of Your World”

14. Jimin “Like Crazy”

15. Ryan Gosling “Push”

16. Metro Boomin, Swae Lee, Lil Wayne, and Offset “Annihilate”

17. NBA YoungBoy, Bailey Zimmerman and Dermot Kennedy “Won’t Back Down”

18. Brian Tyler “Level Complete”

19. Neriame “Unmei Kyoudoutai!”

20. Rahul Sipligunj and Kaala Bhairva “Naatu Naatu”

21. YOASOBI “IDOL”

22. Ryan Gosling “I’m Just Ken” and Cher “DJ Play A Christmas Song”

23. Dr. Teeth and The Electric Mayhem “Rock and Roll All Nite”

24. Taylor Swift “Cruel Summer”

25. LAUV “Steal The Show”

26. U2 “Walk On (Ukraine)” and Blink 182 “One More Time”

27. Jung Kook “Standing Next to You”

28. Linkin Park “Lost”

29. The Weeknd and Ariana Grande “Die for You”

30. Rachel Zegler “Nothing You Can Take From Me”

Runners Up:

Radwimps “Kanata Haluka”

Chris Pine “This Is the Thanks I Get”

BTS “Take Two”

Casey Lee Williams “Worthy”

Oliver Anthony “Rich Men North of Richmond”

Worst:

1. Awkwafina and Daveed Diggs “The Scuttlebutt”

2. Nicki Minaj and Ice Spice “Barbie World”

3. J6 Prison Choir and Donald Trump “Justice For All”

Honorable Mention:

Taylor Swift and Her Taylor’s Version Remakes

Game of The Year

Nominee* Winner^

The Legend of Zelda: Tears of The Kingdom^

Starfield*

Sony’s Spider-Man 2*

Super Mario Bros Wonder*

Hogwarts Legacy*

Worst:

The Lord of the Rings: Gollum

THE JAW DROPPERS:

1. Damar Hamlin

2. The Enterprise D Returns to the fold

3. Barbenheimer

4. Breakthrough of Bilingual VA’s in Anime

5. Hamas Gives another Salvo

6. Memory of a Flerken Brood

7. The Toymaker Spices Up Our Lives

8.  Looks like ______ is back on the Menu

9.  The Twilight of An Icon

10. The Saga of George Santos

HM: A sport goes Swiftie

[themagazinecity]

#TomBrady Goes Shirtless While Swimming With Her Three #Children During An Outing

[mybookplacenet]

Featured Post: Vibration: An Accidental Roommates Romance

About Vibration: An Accidental Roommates Romance: Steam Level: 4 peppers Meet the Brady family. They're brilliant, brooding, and barreling into relationships they weren't expecting. Irresponsible. Impulsive. Reckless. I've has heard it all from my family and I'm getting a little sick of it. I'm a smart guy, after all. In a family of brainy engineers, someone has to be the fun one, but the other Bradys don’t see it that way. To get a break from my family, I decide to move out and answer an online ad for a roommate. What could go wrong? For starters, my roommate turns out to be...not a dude. A smoking hot finance chick. But this is fine. We can be friends who live together. I just need to ignore the simmering lust that clouds my vision. Vibration is a stand-alone part of the Brady Family series. If you love messy family dynamics, unforgettable characters, and sizzling chemistry, you’ll devour this steamy rom-com by Lainey Davis. Buy the ebook: Buy the Book On Amazon Buy the Book On Barnes & Noble/Nook Buy the Book On Smashwords Buy the Book On iBooks/iTunes Buy the Book On Kobo Link to Series Buy the Audio book: Buy the Book On Amazon Buy the Print book: Buy the Book On Amazon Buy the Book On Barnes & Noble/Nook Author Bio: Lainey Davis is a rustbelt writer cranking out the heat and happily ever afters. Follow the author on social media: Learn more about the writer. Visit the Author's Website Facebook Fan Page Read the full article

[s-u-f-j-a-n-s-t-e-v-e-n-s]

These were my absolute favorite movies of 2021, in no particular order:

1. Vacation Friends—Tom Brady and Tyler Perry have great comedic chemistry in this laugh-out-loud rom-com vacation getaway gone awry. With Cameron Diaz and Whoopi Goldberg as Chevy Chase and Beverly D’Angelo. Cinematography by Annie Leibovitz.

2. Cruella—Disney does it again. All the Emmas of Hollywood team up in this villainous origin story in which Sharon Stone adopts a zombie brood of Dalmatians to help kick-start her own hair-care fashion line called “Lucky Scrunchies.” This movie has dog-lover’s pizza written all over it!

3. Jungle Cruise—John Cena and Kirsten Dunst go on a gay-friendly Disney “cruise” ravaged by zombie monkeys in the Brazilian rainforest. A hologram of Michael Jackson makes a cameo as Ronald McDonald in a Technicolor burlesque sequence at Radio City Music Hall (featuring the Muppets), while Chris Pratt and Chris Evans play evil twins manning an atomic submarine in pursuit of a rare anaconda unicorn that gets lost while shopping at Kohl’s. Oscar frontrunner for sure.

4. Venom 2: Let There Be Carnage—More sloppy seconds from Marvel!

5. Drive My Car—This 3-hour HD screensaver from Apple TV is a super-cut of all the most violent murder sequences from Grand Theft Auto: The Battle of Gay Tony. In Japanese with drag subtitles.

6. The Power of the Dog—Benji vs. Cujo in a vicious canine-with-rabies bloodbath from hell. With Kendall Roy as Darth Vader. Now streaming on The Humane Society +.

7. Spencer—A riveting psychological docu-drama in which Kristen Stewart loses a contact lens and spends half the film searching for it inside a palatial mansion. She meets a chiropractor named Spencer Tracy who gives her an “adjustment of a lifetime,” forever changing the course of the universe. Jaw-dropping costume design by a Sears catalog circa 1991.

8. Licorice Pizza—There’s something for everyone in this sci-fi scramble of Mystic Pizza meets Willy Wonka. Olivia Rodrigo stars as the matriarch of a hoard of child-trafficking Antifa vampires smuggling Covid-laced heroin into hospices across America as a plot to overthrow Big Lots. There’s also a show-stopping musical number starring a hologram of Philip Seymour Hoffman as the rat that dragged a slice of pizza up the escalator in that viral video from a few years ago.

9. Spiderman: No Way Home—Peter Parker gets off his meds, breaks up with Zendaya, and finds himself “psychologically ensnared” in Charlotte’s “web of deception.” A downward spiral ensues: meth binge, bankruptcy, a cameo on that TV show Hoarders, where Peter is fatally crushed by a mountain of National Geographic magazines he’s been collecting since first grade. Charlotte hatches a million spider babies who feast on Peter’s “radioactive” carcass and begin spinning a green “virtual-reality” web in the Simulated Matrix Metaverse, where A.I. Chinese Overlord.com takes control of the global marketplace, drinks Pepsi all day, gets diabetes, and has to have its legs surgically removed by Keanu Reeves, whose last words before the anesthesia kicks in are: “Let’s Scooby-Doo this mother.” Starring Elon Musk as Wilbur the Pig and Mark Zuckerberg as James Franco before #metoo. Directed by Satan.

10. Avatar 2—Another masterpiece from John Cameron Mitchell. The Smurfs get swole, drop acid and disembowel Gargamel’s cat Azrael, who comes back as a zombie and eats Vin Diesel’s face right off in a stunning cross-cut-mash-up with Jungle Cruise 2: The Wrath of John Candy. With Amy Schumer as Smurfette.

11. West Side Story—An exhilarating edge-of-your-seat 24-hour C-Span live-stream of Kim and Kanye’s divorce proceedings. Starring Poe from Star Wars and Nicole Kidman from Australia. Directed by a hologram of Ingmar Bergman, with stunning dogma-style cinematography by Karen from Central Park. Now streaming on Disney +.

[lifeofkaze]

A Very Hexley Birthday

A/N: Seeing all those beautiful edits on my dash for the birthday of my favourite twins in the Potterverse (I said what I said), I knew I couldn't possibly do any better. So instead, let's have a look what Ethel and Jim are up to on their birthday, shall we?

This is for you, Bestie! @the-al-chemist

Happy Birthday, Jim and Ethel! 💛❤️

Naturally, Ethel and Jim Hexley and Héloïse Perrault belong to my favourite person in this world @the-al-chemist. The attending guests belong to @slytherindisaster (Lysander Mercury), @kc-and-oc (Siobhan Llewellyn, Bradford Pendleton, Oliver and Eliot Gerard, Ivy Anders), @hogwartsmysteryho (Vinny Raymond), @that-scouse-wizard (Cledwyn Ironwood), @cursebreakerfarrier (Galen Stagg), and @unfortunate-arrow (Anthony Rosen).

Even though the golden arrows of the September sun were showing themselves on the enchanted ceiling in the Great Hall of the Hogwarts School of Witchcraft and Wizardry, Jeremiah Hexley was in a rather glum mood when he reached for the huge bowl of porridge at the Hufflepuff House table.

It was just out of his reach and his fingertips only grazed the rim; he simply would have needed to stand up to get it, but that would only draw attention to the tall, lankish boy, which was something he generally tried to avoid, but especially so today. So Jim sat straight again and reached for a slice of toast instead.

“I wish you the finest of mornings,” he heard a voice call out to him, “isn’t it a wonderful day outside? You should have seen the colours of the sunrise; no one can paint anything as beautiful as that.”

The voice belonged to Lysander Mercury, another Hufflepuff boy from his year, and undoubtedly Jim’s best friend. He had a spring in his step as he walked up to Jim, and his thumbs were hooked under the straps of his suspenders; he hadn’t bothered putting the black jumper of their school uniform over them yet.

He sat down opposite Jim with a graceful motion, grabbing the porridge bowl in the same instance and pushing it over to Jim. Giving Lysander a grateful look, Jim helped himself to a healthy portion and drizzled a teaspoon full of dark golden honey on top, just the way he liked it. But even the prospect of his favourite breakfast wasn’t enough to lighten Jim’s mood, and it wasn’t lost on Lysander.

“Why such a long face, old fellow?” he grinned, and his stress on the word ‘old’ wasn’t lost on Jim, quite the contrary. “It’s not a day to be brooding!”

Jim opened his mouth to explain himself, but was interrupted by the sound of quick footsteps approaching from behind him; a moment later two pairs of arms were flung around his neck and Jim almost knocked over his bowl of porridge in his attempt to not be thrown off the bench.

“Happy Birthday, Jim!” two girls shouted into his ears in perfect unison, of course they did. The sound of their excitement cut through Jim’s eardrums and he winced as he pushed them away.

“Uhm, thank you,” he muttered, “Happy Birthday to you as well,” he said in the direction of the smaller of the two.

Ethel Hexley, his twin sister and complete opposite and in every aspect imaginable, grinned and clapped Jim on his back so hard he almost lurched forward. “Thanks, kiddo. One more year of making sure my little brother has at least some fun in his life.”

“Like a proper big sister should,” her best friend Selene Fraser added with a knowing nod. Not even the Sorting Hat had been able to separate these two, and sometimes Jim wondered who out of them three actually were the twin siblings.

“But, er, you know Effy’s only older by a few minutes... so she isn’t really my big sister, if you want to put it that way…”

Jim trailed off when he saw something whisk past him into the direction of the porridge bowl. Before he had the chance to dive straight into it though, Lysander had already gotten hold of the brown and white ferret Ethel and Selene shared custody of; Alan’s nose twitched as Lysander held him out to Ethel.

“Take your ferret back, Hexley,” he said, “I’d say you two are looking like the actual twins here, but seeing as it’s unfortunately your birthday as well, I’ll let it pass. Consider this my present.”

“Seeing as Alan definitely is the best looking guy I’ve spoken to today, I’ll take that as a compliment, Mercury,” Ethel immediately shot back, with that unmistakable glint in her eyes that Jim knew promised nothing but bother, very wordy bother.

Lysander had already leaned slightly forward as well, his eyes fixed on Jim’s twin sister, ready for their morning round of bickering and Jim sighed.

“Could you two, uhm… maybe, just maybe… perhaps stop it? Just for today?”

“Leave him, Effy, he’s not worth it. Not a match for you anyway,” Selene muttered to her best friend; Jim gave her a grateful look.

“True, Sels, I won’t have my birthday spoiled by a wanna-be artist in suspenders,” Ethel said indignantly, and Lysander opened his mouth in protest. Selene elbowed Ethel into the side, before setting Alan onto her shoulder and linking arms with her, quickly pulling her away before things would escalate. Again.

Selene turned around after a few steps and called over her shoulder. “Come to the Quidditch pitch after classes, Jim, will you? We have a little surprise for you!”

*

Throughout the whole day, Jim wasn’t sure what made him more uncomfortable: all the attention he got because it was his birthday, or the prospect of a surprise set up for him by Ethel and Selene. The sheer idea of everything these two could have been planning was enough to upset Jim’s stomach and he couldn’t even enjoy his favourite roast beef for lunch.

When their last class of the day was over, Jim reluctantly made his may over to the Quidditch pitch, as he had been told to. He had wanted to ask Lysander to come, but then again, bringing Ethel and Lysander into the same space was too much for him today; or any day, to be precise.

As soon as he stepped through the opening in the wooden perimeter of the pitch, he raised his eyebrows in surprise. Ethel and Selene had laid out several red and white chequered picnic blankets in the middle of the immaculate green lawn, just like the ones their parents had at home. He could see baskets full of sandwiches, little cakes, fruit and cheese on every single one of them, alongside countless jugs of pumpkin juice.

Naturally, Ethel and Selene were standing in the midst of the people already gathered there, laughing and joking and having a wonderful time, and Jim’s heart sank a little. He saw many familiar faces; he saw Siobhan Llewellyn and her best friend Galen Stagg, who were feeding slices of roast beef to a very content looking Alan; he saw Oliver Gerard who was laughing with Ethel about a lively story she was telling; he had brought his brother, Eliot, a Ravenclaw boy Jim didn’t really know, and who was looking very comfortable talking to Selene, who was standing next to Ivy Anders and Vinny Raymond were sharing some cake; he could even spy the eternally grumpy Cledwyn Ironwood, who never got tired of proclaiming he wasn’t Ethel’s friend but, just like Jim, had obviously stood no chance in declining the invitation.

All of these people were there, but all of them were Ethel’s friends, not his. Jim sighed; he knew Ethel and Selene had meant well, but they just didn’t understand him, they never really did.

“I ‘ope we aren’t late, non?”

Upon hearing the familiar French accent, Jim’s heart skipped a beat before beating doubly as fast as before. He turned around and his eyes went wide when he saw the group of people who had quietly come up behind him.

“Bon anniversaire, Jim!” Héloïse swept in and quickly kissed him on both cheeks in close succession, before pushing an immaculately wrapped gift into his hands, the edges of the paper sharp and the bow perfectly tied. Jim tried to thank her but his words came out as a horrible stutter and he felt the heat rise to his face; it felt particularly warm where Héloïse had kissed him.

Next up came his dear friend Bradford, who shared his enthusiasm for painting; he extended his hand to Jim to wish him a happy birthday as well, and the gift he was handing over to him felt suspiciously like the elaborate sketchbook Jim had seen on his last trip to Hogsmeade.

His roommate Anthony was there, too, as always accompanied by his wolfhound Conall. Jim bent down to pet the animal and scratch his ears. He had to smile when he saw how enthusiastic Conall was at the prospect of all the attention; at least one of them was, then.

Even Lysander had been invited, or had in any case decided to show up; you never knew with Ethel and him. But whether he had actually been asked to be here or not, Jim was glad to see him.

By Brady’s side, more quiet than the rest, stood Brady’s friend - or at least that’s what they claimed to be - Carolyn Nyberg. Jim was surprised to see her here; he and Carolyn didn’t really have anything in common but Brady, but then again, they were seldomly seen without each other these days. She inclined her head and quietly congratulated him.

The question as to why Carolyn had come, though, was quickly answered when Ethel spotted the new arrivals and bounded over to them. “It’s so good you came! I’m so happy all of you could make it to our birthday picnic. Most of you, that is,” she said with a pointed look in Lysander’s direction, but before he could shoot back, her attention had already shifted to Carolyn.

“Did you manage to make what we talked about?”

Jim could see Carolyn was trying hard not to roll her eyes. “Please, who do you take me for? That was a child’s play.”

Brady gave her a pointed look. “Be nice, Caro, it’s their birthday.”

She sighed, but her face softened and she reached into the hidden pocket in her dress, producing a small, stoppered vial with purple liquid inside. She weighed it in her hands, looking at the mugs of pumpkin juice on the picnic blankets. “I’d say six drops per mug should be sufficient.” She moved the vial out of Ethel’s reach when she extended her hand towards it. “Not one drop more, you hear me?”

“Loud and clear.”

Jim’s apprehension about Ethel putting a potion into their drinks soon vanished when he saw what it was that Carolyn had brewed on his sister’s request. After drinking from the modified juice, everyone of their guests had a distinct spring to their step that made them jump a little every time they moved. He remembered how much fun Ethel and Selene had had when they had turned the floor of the courtyard elastic with the Spongify charm; it had gotten them three weeks worth of detention and a passion for jumping as high as they possibly could.

Not being particularly keen on moving around like a bouncing ball, Jim had only taken the tiniest sip of pumpkin juice when Ethel had offered it to him; it was enough to give his step a tolerable spring, but not enough to make him bounce like the others, and that was just the way Jim preferred it to be.

Jim usually didn’t feel comfortable among so many people, but he had to give Ethel that, even he was enjoying himself. He watched Héloïse and Selene sharing excited whispers about the latest story of the Muggle detective they were so keen about, while Brady was bickering with Siobhan over one thing or the other, and Lysander was busy trying to place Alan on top of Carolyn’s head, who told him very sternly to stop it if he didn’t want a swig of Veritaserum served with his next meal.

Happy that his and Ethel’s friends seemed to be having a good time, Jim sat down on one of the blankets, partly because he wanted to eat something, and partly because he needed a step back from the hustle and bustle.

It wasn’t long, however, before Ethel spotted him. She walked over to him, jumping into the air with each step, and slumped down onto the blanket beside him.

“Aren’t you enjoying yourself?” she wanted to know. For a very brief moment, concern flickered over her freckled face. “Because I did my very best to make this fun for both of us. Look, I even invited that horrible friend of yours,” she said and pulled a face in Lysander’s direction; he stuck his tongue out at her in response before turning away.

“No, uhm, I just needed a short break,” Jim answered and set down his plate. “You, er… you did a great job, Effy, you know? I’m having fun, I think… It’s a lovely birthday party, really… so thank you. I, uhm, I didn’t expect this, to be honest.”

“But why?” Ethel asked; she looked truly baffled at his words.

“We’re just so… uhm, how do I say it… we’re just so different, you and I. I’m quiet and, er, shy, I guess and you’re so… loud and popular and we’re just not much alike.”

Ethel dipped her head back and laughed loudly. “I’m not popular, Jim,” she sniggered, “I just don’t leave people alone. Tell them you’re friends often enough and they end up believing it,” she grinned and waved to Cledwyn, who rolled his eyes and looked away. “There’s nothing more to it than that. I bet you could do it, too.”

But Jim shook his head. “I’m not really so sure of that... I think.”

Ethel nudged him into the side with her shoulder. “Give yourself more credit. You’re my twin brother after all, that has to account for something. If this is any help, we may be polar opposites, but you’re still my favourite person in this world.”

“Uhm, what about Selene?”

Ethel pursed her lips. “Okay, maybe it’s a tie.”

Jim had to smile at that. Remembering something, he reached into the inside pocket of his jacket and pulled out a piece of parchment, tied to a scroll with a crimson piece of ribbon.

“Happy Birthday, Effy,” he said, for once without a stutter.

Ethel’s eyes went wide when she saw the picture Jim had drawn for her. It showed the two of them, laughing with each other. Ethel, despite being smaller than Jim, had his head in a headlock and was ruffling his hair while he was trying to escape, but he was laughing just as much as she was. The drawn versions of themselves were moving over the parchment in fluent motions. Jim had asked for Héloïse’s help with enchanting it; with his French still being awful, it had been one of the most awkward and complicated conversations in his entire life.

“It’s beautiful, Jim, thank you,” she said and flung her arms around his neck. When she let go, she looked a little sheepish. “Now I feel stupid for what I got you, although I’m pretty sure you can need it.”

With a wink, she produced her own gift. Jim could see she had wrapped it in her typical Ethel-style, with way too much wrapping paper and loads of colourful ribbons; one of them looking suspiciously like the hair tie their grandmother had gotten Ethel for Christmas. He blushed deeply when he read the cover of the small red book the parcel contained:

101 Foolproof Ways to a French Witch’s Heart - A Guide for Modern Gentlemen

“Effy… that… um… you… why…” Jim stuttered, his face a deeper shade of red than the Gryffindor banners hanging from the wooden tower behind Ethel.

His twin sister only sniggered. “Read it and thank me later.”

She got to her feet and pulled Jim along, motioning to the entrance of the pitch, where Selene was in the process of levitating a giant birthday cake onto the field. It had enchanted lion and badger figurines on top; the lion was throwing tiny pieces of cake after the badger, who caught it with its mouth.

“Come on now, dear brother,” she said as she linked arms with him and half marched, half dragged him across the lawn towards their friends. “We have a cake to cut.”

[miracleonice87]

25&28 w tkachuk (if not taken)

25. spending time with family / 28. “Where’s all of your holiday spirit, you Scrooge?”

quick note: happy birthday, Matthew 💕 decided to use an OC for this one as it fit a little bit better. enjoy!

quick warning: just alcohol I believe. suuuper fluff. 

song pairing, just for fun: It’s Not Christmas ‘Til You Come Home by Norah Jones (for a sad, mopey, brooding Matty)

_____

“Where’s all of your holiday spirit, you Scrooge?” Keith bellowed, nudging Matthew’s arm with the same hand that held his vodka tonic. The matching drink he poured for Matthew still sat in front of his son on the kitchen island, untouched. That’s how Keith knew his son was really struggling.

“I prefer Grinch,” Matthew grumbled, resting his chin on his fist. “And my holiday spirit left with Leighton.”

Taryn clicked her tongue in pity from the barstool next to him and stood to wrap her arms around her brother’s shoulders. “I know you miss her,” she said as she squeezed him tight. “We miss her, too.”

Matthew attempted a smile and patted his sister’s forearm appreciatively. Brady, on the other hand, took less sensitive approach.

“Yeah, plus you’re way more fun when she’s here,” Brady pointed out, pouring himself another drink.

Matthew rolled his eyes. “Thank you,” he murmured sarcastically, followed by a lengthy sigh. “I just don’t know why she had to be the one to travel so far for this game. I wish somebody else could have.”

“Because it’s a big bowl game, Matthew,” Keith stated in a matter-of-fact tone. “And we all know she’s the best at what she does. It’s Christmas Day. There’s gonna be a lot of eyeballs watching this afternoon. You should be proud. And understanding. She works in sports and you’re a pro athlete. Of anybody, you should get it.”

Matthew dropped his head back in dramatic fashion. As much as he hated to admit it, his dad was right. He absolutely loved that his girlfriend worked as a sideline reporter for college football — they understood each others’ insane work schedules and had a special bond over their passion for sports of all kinds. He loved listening to Leighton’s reporting because she was a hell of a lot smarter than he was, and also a lot smarter than most other reporters… plus, the fact that she was an complete smokeshow, and all his, was the cherry on top.

But her job stealing her away from him at Christmas just wasn’t fair.

“Speaking of which, her game is starting soon,” Taryn said, glancing at the oven clock. She clapped Matthew’s back and ordered, “Come on, let’s go.” Taryn led the way into the living room as each family member found a seat in front of the TV.

As if Matthew could have ever forgotten, Leighton was working a bowl game in Phoenix. He had initially tried to force his way into joining her on her trip, but she refused to allow him to spend Christmas Day alone in a hotel room or waiting for her somewhere squeezed into the sold out stadium. She insisted on Matthew’s going home to spend the holidays with his family, who barely got to see him at all during the NHL season. Though they’d promised to have their own Christmas when they both returned to Calgary late on Boxing Day, they were both brokenhearted at the prospect of spending their first major holiday apart.

“It just won’t be Christmas without you, Leight,” Matthew sighed as he leaned his forehead against hers during their final goodbye at the airport.

She took a deep breath and tried to hold herself together at his statement, her fingers smoothing the short hair at the nape of his neck. When she looked back into his face, her eyes shone with tears.

“I’m sorry,” Leighton whispered, not trusting her voice to carry her words. Matthew shook his head.

“Don’t be sorry, baby,” he whispered, pressing his lips to the space between her brows. “I’m just gonna miss you is all.” Leighton squeezed his neck tighter, and after one last searing kiss, she pulled back with a sniffle.

“I’m gonna miss you too,” she told him. “Like always.” She reached for the handle of her rolling suitcase beside her and said, “I really have to go.” Matthew nodded.

“Okay. Be safe,” he said quietly, pulling her into his chest once more. “I love you, Leight. Merry Christmas.”

He felt her choke on a sob before she whispered, “Merry Christmas, Matty. I love you so much.”

And with that, she threw him a tight smile with red, watery eyes and forced her feet to carry her inside to the check-in counter, before she gave in and jumped back into Matthew’s car and returned home with him, like every muscle in her body was screaming at her to do.

Though he smiled when Leighton first appeared onscreen, looking even more beautiful than usual, Matthew then immediately replayed the memory of their crushing goodbye a few days prior, and his face fell once more. His mom, seated next to him, took notice, and wrapped her hand around his, smoothing the other over his cheek with a sad smile. He squeezed her fingers and gave a halfhearted smile of his own.

Michigan edged out a win over Florida after an ultra-competitive game, which Matthew couldn’t even enjoy because his heart ached each time Leighton was shown on the sideline. He sighed after each report she gave, and by the end of the game, when it was time for dinner, he had given into the drinks Keith was offering and was now well into the process of drowning his sorrows.

He did his best to contribute to the conversation at the dinner table, but after the plates were cleared and they returned to the living room to play board games and watch Christmas movies, Matthew fell quiet once more. No one called him out for it — they felt the weight of Leighton’s absence, too. She had become an integral part of the Tkachuk family dynamic, and not having her there just felt wrong.

By the time it was nearing midnight, Matthew was lying motionless on the couch, watching Home Alone but not laughing at any of the parts that made him chuckle each time it was on. He was just about to force himself upright to pour one last cocktail for the night when there was a knock at the door.

Everyone fell silent.

Brady and Taryn looked at each other at the same time, and Taryn whispered, “No way…”

Matthew looked to his parents, cuddled together on the couch across the room. Chantal appeared just as surprised as her children did, but Keith’s eyes had a distinct glimmer in them. He gave half a shrug and said from behind his glass, “Well, why don’t you go answer it?”

It couldn’t be. No. It wasn’t. Was it? There was no way. Taryn was right. No way.

Halfway through a second knock, Matthew swung open the door to find a certain sports reporter on his doorstep, still dressed in the same ensemble she had worn on the sideline, covered with a pea coat and a Flames beanie.

A breathy chuckle escaped through her smiling lips and rose through the air as a puff of white steam.

“Hi, Matty,” Leighton said simply.

For a moment, Matthew was completely and utterly frozen in place, convinced his mind was playing tricks on him. When he blinked and realized that his girlfriend was still standing before him, that she was truly here in St. Louis, he lunged toward her and buried his face in her neck — she would have fallen over for certain if not for how tightly his arms wrapped around her waist.

Leighton felt tears on her barely-exposed skin as she wrapped her own arms around Matthew as best she could. She turned her head to press a kiss to his cheekbone and said softly, “Did you really think I was going to be able to survive spending a whole Christmas without you?”

He laughed in disbelief and admitted, “I almost didn’t. Just ask them.” He nodded toward his family, who were now all huddled in the entryway together. She giggled and smiled brightly at them, the family who had long treated her as one of their own — including the probable future father-in-law who had schemed to get her to them as soon as humanly possible after her game had concluded.

Before she could step inside to greet them, though, Matthew firmly grabbed her face in both his hands and gave her a long, tender kiss — the kind that told her just how much she had been missed.

“I can’t believe you’re here. God, I love you, Leighton,” he whispered, nuzzling her cold nose with his warm one. “You’re all I wanted for Christmas this year.”